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1
00:00:05,047 --> 00:00:07,216
[GRUNTS]
2
00:00:07,299 --> 00:00:09,468
HATRED:
It's touch football! Touch!
3
00:00:09,551 --> 00:00:10,552
Oh. I didn't know.
4
00:00:10,636 --> 00:00:11,887
You did too!
5
00:00:11,970 --> 00:00:12,888
You have it in for me!
6
00:00:12,971 --> 00:00:14,848
Why didn't you throw Dean the ball?!
7
00:00:14,932 --> 00:00:16,683
Oh, why do you think?
8
00:00:16,767 --> 00:00:18,894
Guys! What's with the tea party?!
9
00:00:18,977 --> 00:00:20,729
I am so open!
10
00:00:20,812 --> 00:00:22,564
Oh, I-I didn't see you there.
11
00:00:22,648 --> 00:00:25,734
I didn't think to check our own end zone!
12
00:00:25,817 --> 00:00:27,945
You're just mad you didn't get to be skins.
13
00:00:28,028 --> 00:00:29,404
Well, we should have been skins!
14
00:00:29,488 --> 00:00:31,114
We won the damn toss, but Dean was all,
15
00:00:31,198 --> 00:00:34,326
"Nyah! I don't want to
get sunburned! Nyah!"
16
00:00:34,409 --> 00:00:35,536
Dean.
17
00:00:35,619 --> 00:00:36,954
Why didn't we get
Professor Snape or Hank?
18
00:00:37,037 --> 00:00:39,414
'Cause I'm always on Brock's team.
19
00:00:39,498 --> 00:00:42,626
Somebody's in my car.
20
00:00:42,709 --> 00:00:44,253
SHORELEAVE:
All right, that is a legitimate superpower.
21
00:00:44,336 --> 00:00:46,630
Seen him do that from
another country away.
22
00:00:46,713 --> 00:00:47,923
[SCOFFS]
Big deal.
23
00:00:48,006 --> 00:00:49,883
Come on! Give me a chance!
24
00:00:49,967 --> 00:00:51,510
I'm wide open here!
25
00:00:57,516 --> 00:00:59,439
Oh, what the hell are you doing?
26
00:01:01,645 --> 00:01:03,564
Well, obviously, you're not serious
27
00:01:03,647 --> 00:01:06,775
because you know that I
converted my engine to electric.
28
00:01:06,858 --> 00:01:08,610
It's not only green,
29
00:01:08,694 --> 00:01:11,655
it's 100% crybaby suicide proof.
30
00:01:11,738 --> 00:01:13,574
Now let's talk this out.
31
00:01:13,657 --> 00:01:16,827
Nobody's gonna road-flare their brains out.
32
00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:18,495
Now what's going on, huh?
33
00:01:18,579 --> 00:01:20,038
What happened this time?
34
00:01:23,041 --> 00:01:24,209
Time's up. Let's go.
35
00:01:24,293 --> 00:01:26,795
HATRED:
Don't pressure him.
36
00:01:26,878 --> 00:01:28,672
I've been in his shoes.
37
00:01:28,755 --> 00:01:31,008
I've seen my wife's legs
wrapped around some...
38
00:01:31,091 --> 00:01:32,759
jerk!
39
00:01:32,843 --> 00:01:35,262
And I thought,
"what's the ding-dong point?"
40
00:01:35,345 --> 00:01:37,681
Yeah, not sure that's
helpful there, big guy.
41
00:01:37,764 --> 00:01:39,016
Thanks, buddy.
[SNIFFLES]
42
00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:40,684
Put your shirt on.
43
00:01:40,767 --> 00:01:42,019
I really wanted to be skins.
44
00:01:42,102 --> 00:01:44,062
I know. I know.
45
00:01:44,146 --> 00:01:46,398
Look, can you just talk about it?
46
00:01:46,481 --> 00:01:48,984
It can't be that bad.
47
00:01:49,067 --> 00:01:50,902
Will you just knock it off?!
48
00:01:50,986 --> 00:01:52,613
Daddy, is it something Hank did?
49
00:01:52,696 --> 00:01:55,407
Dude, don't drag me under this bus.
50
00:01:55,490 --> 00:01:57,326
When my pumpkin went away,
51
00:01:57,409 --> 00:01:59,995
I, too, suffered the grim
cloud of listlessness,
52
00:02:00,078 --> 00:02:03,081
but our duty is to--
53
00:02:03,165 --> 00:02:05,417
Mr. Venture is not suicidal.
54
00:02:05,500 --> 00:02:06,835
Oh, really?
55
00:02:06,918 --> 00:02:09,963
Then why is he trying to
hang himself from your tie?
56
00:02:10,047 --> 00:02:12,007
Because Mr. Venture...
57
00:02:12,090 --> 00:02:14,509
is possessed!
58
00:02:17,095 --> 00:02:19,014
[MONITOR BEEPING]
59
00:02:21,975 --> 00:02:24,144
ORPHEUS:
Okay, I'm ready.
60
00:02:24,227 --> 00:02:26,563
Good gracious. What's all this nonsense?
61
00:02:26,647 --> 00:02:28,565
The man doesn't have a fever.
62
00:02:28,649 --> 00:02:30,817
They did it to Dorothy
in the Wizard of Oz.
63
00:02:30,901 --> 00:02:32,027
I don't know.
64
00:02:32,110 --> 00:02:33,820
I also hooked up this field monitor
65
00:02:33,904 --> 00:02:35,572
from my old O.S.I. days.
66
00:02:35,656 --> 00:02:38,158
Sure, it's a little dusty,
but it'll work...
67
00:02:38,241 --> 00:02:39,242
probably.
68
00:02:39,326 --> 00:02:40,952
And the bucket?
69
00:02:41,036 --> 00:02:43,246
Oh, that's for the
geyser of pea-soup vomit.
70
00:02:43,330 --> 00:02:45,791
- And the camera?
- Also for the vomit.
71
00:02:45,874 --> 00:02:47,376
Do I even have to ask?
72
00:02:47,459 --> 00:02:48,794
They said there was gonna be vomit.
73
00:02:48,877 --> 00:02:51,380
This isn't a Gallagher Too performance.
74
00:02:51,463 --> 00:02:53,048
It's a sacred rite.
75
00:02:53,131 --> 00:02:55,050
I want you two gentlemen to hold him down.
76
00:02:55,133 --> 00:02:58,303
The demon will fight
as I cast the spell of binding.
77
00:02:58,387 --> 00:03:00,722
Anything could happen.
78
00:03:00,806 --> 00:03:02,307
Anything but that.
79
00:03:02,391 --> 00:03:05,018
Ready, gentlemen?
80
00:03:05,102 --> 00:03:06,520
I hold thee.
81
00:03:06,603 --> 00:03:09,064
I constrain thee!
82
00:03:09,147 --> 00:03:11,525
With the name Sidragrosam,
83
00:03:11,608 --> 00:03:14,611
I bind thee!
84
00:03:14,695 --> 00:03:15,946
Aah!
85
00:03:16,029 --> 00:03:17,614
That dick!
86
00:03:17,698 --> 00:03:20,075
Come on. Come on, Rusty!
87
00:03:20,158 --> 00:03:21,618
Pansy.
88
00:03:21,702 --> 00:03:22,953
Move!
89
00:03:23,036 --> 00:03:25,706
Kill yourself already!
90
00:03:25,789 --> 00:03:27,082
Do something!
91
00:03:27,165 --> 00:03:29,084
[BEEPING]
92
00:03:29,167 --> 00:03:31,086
Vitals down! We're losing him!
93
00:03:31,169 --> 00:03:33,046
- What happened?!
- No idea.
94
00:03:33,130 --> 00:03:34,089
We gotta bring him out!
95
00:03:34,172 --> 00:03:35,674
We can't! He'll be a vegetable!
96
00:03:35,757 --> 00:03:37,092
Don't yell at me!
97
00:03:37,175 --> 00:03:39,136
I'm not yelling at you.
I'm telling at you!
98
00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:41,221
He has to return on his own.
99
00:03:41,304 --> 00:03:43,557
- Well, what do we do?
- Keep him alive!
100
00:03:43,640 --> 00:03:45,100
You are still yelling.
101
00:03:45,183 --> 00:03:46,518
Oh, I'm gonna throw up.
102
00:03:46,601 --> 00:03:48,562
I'm gonna throw up in Venture's brain.
103
00:03:48,645 --> 00:03:50,105
This is --
[GAGS]
104
00:03:50,188 --> 00:03:51,231
Oh, God!
105
00:03:51,314 --> 00:03:55,026
I'm gonna puke all over his
crappy childhood memories.
106
00:03:55,110 --> 00:03:56,194
So good.
107
00:03:56,278 --> 00:03:57,320
[FLATLINE]
108
00:03:57,404 --> 00:03:58,655
- He's flatlining!
- I'm gonna defibrillate!
109
00:03:58,739 --> 00:04:00,115
Clear!
110
00:04:00,198 --> 00:04:02,117
Oh, my God!
I don't know what that means!
111
00:04:02,200 --> 00:04:03,118
Stay clear!
112
00:04:03,201 --> 00:04:05,203
Well, of course I wi--
Wait, that's what it means?
113
00:04:05,287 --> 00:04:06,413
Yes!
114
00:04:06,496 --> 00:04:07,748
[ELECTRICITY CRACKLES]
115
00:04:07,831 --> 00:04:08,957
Vitals.
116
00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:10,667
He's back, but he's weak.
117
00:04:10,751 --> 00:04:12,127
Help me hook up life support.
118
00:04:12,210 --> 00:04:14,796
That was so fucking scary.
119
00:04:14,880 --> 00:04:15,672
[SIGHS]
120
00:04:15,756 --> 00:04:17,799
Can't believe I actually said "clear!"
121
00:04:17,883 --> 00:04:19,134
Yeah, that totally didn't help.
122
00:04:19,217 --> 00:04:20,385
I thought I was supposed to push, like,
123
00:04:20,469 --> 00:04:22,137
the "clear" button or something.
124
00:04:22,220 --> 00:04:23,263
Hey, you think he's gonna bring back
125
00:04:23,346 --> 00:04:24,556
a pissed-off Billy Mahoney with him?
126
00:04:24,639 --> 00:04:25,640
Right?
127
00:04:25,724 --> 00:04:27,142
Running around the cocoon in that hoodie?
128
00:04:27,225 --> 00:04:28,143
Totally.
129
00:04:28,226 --> 00:04:29,352
Hey, can I put them on his nipples
130
00:04:29,436 --> 00:04:30,812
like he's a robot stripper?
131
00:04:30,896 --> 00:04:32,814
Okay, w-what do I do?
132
00:04:32,898 --> 00:04:35,817
Should I boil holy water
or, uh, rip up some sheets?
133
00:04:35,901 --> 00:04:37,152
Look, he's possessed, Hank.
134
00:04:37,235 --> 00:04:39,196
He's not giving birth to a monster baby.
135
00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:41,072
If you need a bible, I have one on tape
136
00:04:41,156 --> 00:04:43,116
narrated by Mr. Darth Vader.
137
00:04:43,200 --> 00:04:44,367
I have like 10 rosaries left over
138
00:04:44,451 --> 00:04:47,162
from my short-lived,
ill-conceived Madonna phase.
139
00:04:47,245 --> 00:04:49,206
As much as I appreciate all your help,
140
00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:51,166
I am not a priest.
141
00:04:51,249 --> 00:04:53,919
I am a master necromancer!
142
00:04:54,002 --> 00:04:56,171
I will enter Mr. Venture's mind,
143
00:04:56,254 --> 00:04:59,132
and there do battle with
the unwelcomed spirit.
144
00:04:59,216 --> 00:05:00,300
Oh, can I come?
145
00:05:00,383 --> 00:05:01,968
Uh, no.
146
00:05:02,052 --> 00:05:03,178
But you can help me.
147
00:05:03,261 --> 00:05:04,888
I can only gain entry to his soul
148
00:05:04,971 --> 00:05:06,932
if I am perceived as friendly.
149
00:05:07,015 --> 00:05:09,351
Boys, you are the great
love of your father's life.
150
00:05:09,434 --> 00:05:11,228
Be my raiments!
151
00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:13,980
Take my hands! Gird me!
152
00:05:14,064 --> 00:05:17,526
I am blessed by what he loves most --
153
00:05:17,609 --> 00:05:20,195
the key to his soul's lock!
154
00:05:20,278 --> 00:05:26,201
Open his mind to me!
155
00:05:26,284 --> 00:05:28,203
Please?
156
00:05:28,286 --> 00:05:31,665
Yeah, I'm not sure
you have the right, uh...
157
00:05:31,748 --> 00:05:33,083
key?
158
00:05:33,166 --> 00:05:35,210
I am blessed by what he loves most --
159
00:05:35,293 --> 00:05:37,212
the key to his soul's lock.
160
00:05:37,295 --> 00:05:39,047
Open his mind to me!
161
00:05:39,130 --> 00:05:41,091
Nope. Maybe I should--
162
00:05:41,174 --> 00:05:41,967
Wait!
163
00:05:42,050 --> 00:05:43,510
Okay, try it with his old headshot,
164
00:05:43,593 --> 00:05:44,636
all the awards,
165
00:05:44,719 --> 00:05:45,929
the signed picture of Loni Anderson,
166
00:05:46,012 --> 00:05:47,556
all the money, the newspaper clippings,
167
00:05:47,639 --> 00:05:49,182
the shoe box of old love letters,
168
00:05:49,266 --> 00:05:51,309
but without the Rush cassette.
169
00:05:51,393 --> 00:05:54,145
Oh, here's your problem --
it's a "Best Of."
170
00:05:54,229 --> 00:05:57,232
And there's one more thing
we haven't tried,
171
00:05:57,315 --> 00:06:01,069
and it's nothing personal, but...
172
00:06:01,152 --> 00:06:02,737
I get it.
173
00:06:02,821 --> 00:06:06,241
Okay, one more time.
174
00:06:06,324 --> 00:06:09,369
I am blessed by what he loves most --
175
00:06:09,452 --> 00:06:13,164
the key to his soul's lock.
176
00:06:13,248 --> 00:06:18,628
Open his mind to me!
177
00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:21,673
I'm sure it was the Rush cassette, Dean.
178
00:06:27,929 --> 00:06:29,097
Back, demon,
179
00:06:29,180 --> 00:06:31,933
lest I unleash my awesome powers!
180
00:06:34,436 --> 00:06:36,688
All right, that's uncalled for!
181
00:06:36,771 --> 00:06:38,815
Yeah, that's racial
profiling is what that is!
182
00:06:38,899 --> 00:06:39,941
Oh, dear.
183
00:06:40,025 --> 00:06:41,026
I-I-I thought he was a--
184
00:06:41,109 --> 00:06:42,861
Demon? 'Cause of the way I dress?
185
00:06:42,944 --> 00:06:44,321
'Cause you're a bigot, maybe?
186
00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:46,281
And a total hypocrite. Look at him!
187
00:06:46,364 --> 00:06:48,199
Yeah, Dracula. Where do you get off?
188
00:06:48,283 --> 00:06:50,327
Okay, I get it. I apologize.
189
00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:52,454
So whom do I have the pleasure to meet?
190
00:06:52,537 --> 00:06:54,414
You are Cupid, I assume.
191
00:06:54,497 --> 00:06:55,540
Cupid?!
192
00:06:55,624 --> 00:06:57,292
W-Why would Cupid be in The Rusty?
193
00:06:57,375 --> 00:06:59,336
Come on. Will you stop
basing everything on looks?
194
00:06:59,419 --> 00:07:01,087
How do you not know me?
195
00:07:01,171 --> 00:07:04,299
I'm Eros. Hello?
And I'm pretty important.
196
00:07:04,382 --> 00:07:06,176
Eros -- kind of popular. I've got fans.
197
00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:07,844
You really should recognize us --
198
00:07:07,928 --> 00:07:09,304
pistol-hot careers.
199
00:07:09,387 --> 00:07:10,764
Yes, of course!
200
00:07:10,847 --> 00:07:13,516
Eros and Thanatos -- sex and death.
201
00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:15,560
You two motivate our every action.
202
00:07:15,644 --> 00:07:17,062
Well put, Count Freud.
203
00:07:17,145 --> 00:07:18,647
Now, what the hell are you doing in here?
204
00:07:18,730 --> 00:07:20,106
Seriously, what is this, open house,
205
00:07:20,190 --> 00:07:21,775
bring your daughter to work day?
206
00:07:21,858 --> 00:07:24,027
We don't have time for another
intruder screwing things up.
207
00:07:24,110 --> 00:07:26,613
We have a complete
cerebral shutdown to deal with
208
00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:27,781
from the other guy.
209
00:07:27,864 --> 00:07:29,324
Yeah, we got maybe an hour or two
210
00:07:29,407 --> 00:07:31,117
before The Rusty falls into a coma.
211
00:07:31,201 --> 00:07:33,995
And then the chill hand of
death takes The Rusty home.
212
00:07:34,079 --> 00:07:35,330
Okay, there, Mr. Good news.
213
00:07:35,413 --> 00:07:36,331
Merciless is the end!
214
00:07:36,414 --> 00:07:38,333
Let's bring it down. Just breathe.
215
00:07:38,416 --> 00:07:40,877
In with the good air,
out with the crazy air.
216
00:07:40,961 --> 00:07:42,045
I want you to breathe.
217
00:07:42,128 --> 00:07:43,171
Thanks, buddy.
218
00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:44,381
I-I got in the zone again.
219
00:07:44,464 --> 00:07:46,049
I think I may be responsible
220
00:07:46,132 --> 00:07:48,218
for the shutdown you speak of.
221
00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:49,678
Nice.
222
00:07:49,761 --> 00:07:51,096
So how is he?
223
00:07:51,179 --> 00:07:52,347
Stable, I hope.
224
00:07:52,430 --> 00:07:54,516
Sweetie, can you hear me?
225
00:07:54,599 --> 00:07:56,059
I bet he needs something familiar.
226
00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:57,394
Sing him your guy's song.
227
00:07:57,477 --> 00:08:00,021
We're not Bernie Taupin and Elton John.
228
00:08:00,105 --> 00:08:01,314
We don't write songs.
229
00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:02,649
No, I mean like your song --
230
00:08:02,732 --> 00:08:04,901
the song that's yours, like a romantic--
231
00:08:04,985 --> 00:08:06,820
Oh, right. No. We don't have one.
232
00:08:06,903 --> 00:08:07,946
What? Nothing?
233
00:08:08,029 --> 00:08:08,905
Lady in Red?
234
00:08:08,989 --> 00:08:10,365
No. W-Wait!
235
00:08:10,448 --> 00:08:12,367
He always sings that
Human League song to me.
236
00:08:12,450 --> 00:08:13,410
What is it?
237
00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:15,036
Keep Feeling Fascination?
238
00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:16,454
[LAUGHING]
Oh, my God. No.
239
00:08:16,538 --> 00:08:18,456
Wait! I know which one!
240
00:08:18,540 --> 00:08:21,376
? So they were working like a countess ?
241
00:08:21,459 --> 00:08:22,544
? In a cocktail glass ?
242
00:08:22,627 --> 00:08:24,504
? When I knew about you ?
243
00:08:24,587 --> 00:08:26,381
? Don't you want me? ?
244
00:08:26,464 --> 00:08:27,716
? Do you not want me? ?
245
00:08:27,799 --> 00:08:29,718
? Don't you want me, baby? ?
246
00:08:29,801 --> 00:08:31,386
That is not even close.
247
00:08:31,469 --> 00:08:32,429
- [BANG ON DOOR]
- What?!
248
00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:34,472
It's Tim-Tom and Kevin!
249
00:08:34,556 --> 00:08:35,932
Security inspection!
250
00:08:36,016 --> 00:08:37,392
Go away!
251
00:08:37,475 --> 00:08:38,393
Can't, mum.
252
00:08:38,476 --> 00:08:40,478
Mandatory -- Monarch's orders.
253
00:08:40,562 --> 00:08:42,897
Don't look at me! It was his idea.
254
00:08:42,981 --> 00:08:44,274
The first of every month,
255
00:08:44,357 --> 00:08:45,442
there's this mandatory inspection --
256
00:08:45,525 --> 00:08:46,776
no exceptions.
257
00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:49,404
And to look like a big man,
he even included himself.
258
00:08:49,487 --> 00:08:50,655
We're coming in!
259
00:08:50,739 --> 00:08:52,449
Crap. They can't see this.
260
00:08:52,532 --> 00:08:55,535
The whole mind-assassin
thing is against Guild rules.
261
00:08:55,618 --> 00:08:57,412
It is?! Oh, great!
262
00:08:57,495 --> 00:08:59,414
Super! Brilliant idea.
263
00:08:59,497 --> 00:09:00,957
Take off your clothes!
264
00:09:01,041 --> 00:09:02,417
All right, Venture.
265
00:09:02,500 --> 00:09:04,419
You think you bested me, huh?
266
00:09:04,502 --> 00:09:07,464
I'll give you nightmares
you'll never recover from.
267
00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:09,424
Tippy-tap, tippy-tap.
268
00:09:09,507 --> 00:09:10,508
Bup-bup, bup-bup bup.
269
00:09:10,592 --> 00:09:11,593
Oh, you like that?
270
00:09:11,676 --> 00:09:14,095
Every memory of you
being hated by everyone
271
00:09:14,179 --> 00:09:16,431
just come flooding into your dreams?
272
00:09:16,514 --> 00:09:18,099
Sweet!
273
00:09:18,183 --> 00:09:19,434
Oh, you are in for it, Venture.
274
00:09:19,517 --> 00:09:21,644
That is like a huge Frankenstein switch.
275
00:09:21,728 --> 00:09:23,772
That has got to be bad.
276
00:09:23,855 --> 00:09:25,982
Suck on this!
277
00:09:26,066 --> 00:09:27,776
Well, if there is something
controlling The Rusty,
278
00:09:27,859 --> 00:09:29,736
you're gonna find it in master control.
279
00:09:29,819 --> 00:09:31,196
That's the fourth level of the psyche.
280
00:09:31,279 --> 00:09:33,448
Yeah, it's a straight path
right through the back of the brain.
281
00:09:33,531 --> 00:09:35,997
If nothing goes wrong,
we'll be there in a snap.
282
00:09:39,412 --> 00:09:41,456
That counts as something wrong.
283
00:09:41,539 --> 00:09:42,665
No exceptions!
284
00:09:42,749 --> 00:09:43,792
Monarch's orders!
285
00:09:43,875 --> 00:09:45,460
All right! Hold on! Geez!
286
00:09:45,543 --> 00:09:46,503
That's it!
287
00:09:46,586 --> 00:09:49,339
I'm gonna bash the door down
with my secret mind powers.
288
00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:50,924
Back up, Tim-Tom!
289
00:09:51,007 --> 00:09:53,468
You don't have secret powers.
290
00:09:53,551 --> 00:09:55,386
That's because they're secret --
291
00:09:55,470 --> 00:09:56,596
maybe even to me.
292
00:09:56,679 --> 00:09:58,264
But I have a key to the door.
293
00:09:58,348 --> 00:09:59,140
Oh, whatever.
294
00:09:59,224 --> 00:10:00,892
It just-- Now we'll never know
295
00:10:00,975 --> 00:10:02,811
if I have secret mind powers.
296
00:10:02,894 --> 00:10:05,688
All right, what's all the
hoop-dee-hoo in here?
297
00:10:05,772 --> 00:10:08,483
Now let's see what we...
298
00:10:08,566 --> 00:10:09,484
Okay.
299
00:10:09,567 --> 00:10:12,112
Well, I guess this is inspected,
300
00:10:12,195 --> 00:10:13,613
and we should just go.
301
00:10:13,696 --> 00:10:16,491
We'll just, uh, tick this off,
302
00:10:16,574 --> 00:10:19,244
and sorry to disturb you, Monarch.
303
00:10:19,327 --> 00:10:22,789
[MUFFLED]
Close the door behind you.
304
00:10:25,834 --> 00:10:28,753
The doors of perception
have opened all at once!
305
00:10:28,837 --> 00:10:30,463
We must close them!
306
00:10:30,547 --> 00:10:31,756
Hey, there's quadrillions of them!
307
00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:32,966
Maybe millions!
308
00:10:33,049 --> 00:10:35,051
What are you -- quadrillions
is a larger number.
309
00:10:35,135 --> 00:10:36,594
Quadrillions is a fake number.
310
00:10:36,678 --> 00:10:38,555
No, it's not! It's a thousand billion.
311
00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:39,639
Really?
312
00:10:39,722 --> 00:10:41,391
Are you just trying to
make me look like a douche
313
00:10:41,474 --> 00:10:42,559
in front of the new guy?
314
00:10:42,642 --> 00:10:43,643
[DISTANT RUMBLING]
315
00:10:43,726 --> 00:10:44,853
Did you feel that?
316
00:10:44,936 --> 00:10:46,187
Thank you! Yes.
317
00:10:46,271 --> 00:10:48,523
And it hurts because I always
say nice things about him.
318
00:10:48,606 --> 00:10:49,941
But he's always--
319
00:10:50,024 --> 00:10:51,442
No, that rumble!
320
00:10:51,526 --> 00:10:52,527
What is that rumble?!
321
00:10:52,610 --> 00:10:53,945
Leviathan.
322
00:10:54,028 --> 00:10:55,530
He is why men murder.
323
00:10:55,613 --> 00:10:57,448
He is why men make war --
324
00:10:57,532 --> 00:10:59,450
the beast within us all.
325
00:10:59,534 --> 00:11:00,535
We are doomed!
326
00:11:00,618 --> 00:11:01,619
Cheery, isn't he?
327
00:11:01,703 --> 00:11:03,413
Crap! Get out of the way!
328
00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:04,539
[ALL MOANING]
329
00:11:07,625 --> 00:11:08,835
I hate those things.
330
00:11:08,918 --> 00:11:10,253
They're all over the place in here,
331
00:11:10,336 --> 00:11:11,462
and they chew on stuff,
332
00:11:11,546 --> 00:11:12,881
and they get poop on everything.
333
00:11:12,964 --> 00:11:14,966
They are his dead sons --
334
00:11:15,049 --> 00:11:18,553
forever haunting his subconscious mind.
335
00:11:18,636 --> 00:11:20,513
Leviathan draws near!
336
00:11:20,597 --> 00:11:22,223
Death is at hand!
337
00:11:22,307 --> 00:11:24,058
We cannot outrun the beast!
338
00:11:24,142 --> 00:11:25,560
He gets that way around death.
339
00:11:25,643 --> 00:11:27,103
It's like he's in a Creed video.
340
00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:29,439
Why don't we just go in
one of these doors?
341
00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:30,607
Okay.
342
00:11:30,690 --> 00:11:33,443
Yeah, that's cool.
343
00:11:33,526 --> 00:11:35,486
No change. He's steady.
344
00:11:35,570 --> 00:11:36,696
Or this takes batteries. I don't know.
345
00:11:36,779 --> 00:11:37,906
[THUMPING, GLASS SHATTERS]
346
00:11:37,989 --> 00:11:39,365
Hey, no indoor football!
347
00:11:39,449 --> 00:11:40,450
Outside!
348
00:11:40,533 --> 00:11:41,743
SHORELEAVE:
'Kay!
349
00:11:41,826 --> 00:11:42,827
U-uh, we were just, you know--
350
00:11:42,911 --> 00:11:44,537
HANK:
Sorry, Brock!
351
00:11:44,621 --> 00:11:47,540
Yeah, that's kind of my job now.
352
00:11:47,624 --> 00:11:49,709
Hank, I'm gonna do a white load,
353
00:11:49,792 --> 00:11:52,712
so make sure all your
panties are in the hamper!
354
00:11:52,795 --> 00:11:54,589
Panties?
355
00:11:54,672 --> 00:11:56,132
Y-You know, their little...
356
00:11:56,216 --> 00:11:57,717
underpanties.
357
00:11:57,800 --> 00:12:01,512
That's what I -- Hey, uh,
what you eating there?
358
00:12:01,596 --> 00:12:03,056
Uh, Skittles.
359
00:12:03,139 --> 00:12:05,475
Can I have some?
360
00:12:05,558 --> 00:12:07,852
One?! A Skittle?
361
00:12:07,936 --> 00:12:10,104
I have to thank you for
putting up with all this.
362
00:12:10,188 --> 00:12:12,815
You know, the Monarch
just jumps into things.
363
00:12:12,899 --> 00:12:15,610
He doesn't mean to do it to us,
but he's--
364
00:12:15,693 --> 00:12:16,611
Our leader.
365
00:12:16,694 --> 00:12:18,279
I am his henchman.
366
00:12:18,363 --> 00:12:19,489
Oh, come on, 21.
367
00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:20,823
You're not just one of the drones,
368
00:12:20,907 --> 00:12:21,699
you're different.
369
00:12:21,783 --> 00:12:22,784
Am I?
370
00:12:22,867 --> 00:12:23,868
[SIGHS]
371
00:12:23,952 --> 00:12:26,246
I had dreams once, and I've
given them to the Monarch.
372
00:12:26,329 --> 00:12:27,789
I even bought my own costume.
373
00:12:27,872 --> 00:12:29,624
I was saving up for a monster truck,
374
00:12:29,707 --> 00:12:33,086
or maybe for Patrick Swayze's
leather jacket from Road House.
375
00:12:33,169 --> 00:12:35,797
Or, I don't know, have
Rockapella perform for the guys.
376
00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:37,632
But I'm out of dreams.
377
00:12:37,715 --> 00:12:39,801
Look, I know that we all
have numbers in this game.
378
00:12:39,884 --> 00:12:42,637
We're supposed to just
forget that we make people die.
379
00:12:42,720 --> 00:12:45,265
But when it hits home, i-it's hard.
380
00:12:45,348 --> 00:12:47,225
Gary, you've seen too much.
381
00:12:47,308 --> 00:12:49,644
I've seen my only real friend die.
382
00:12:49,727 --> 00:12:53,106
I've seen a giant penny roll
over a guy dressed like a rainbow.
383
00:12:53,189 --> 00:12:55,441
I've seen the Donkey Kong kill screen.
384
00:12:55,525 --> 00:12:58,653
I've seen attack ships on
fire off the shoulder of Orion.
385
00:12:58,736 --> 00:13:01,489
Oh, G-A-R-Y!
386
00:13:01,572 --> 00:13:02,907
You ain't got no alibi!
387
00:13:02,991 --> 00:13:04,701
You're Gary! What, what?!
388
00:13:04,784 --> 00:13:05,868
You're Gary!
389
00:13:05,952 --> 00:13:08,443
Okay, I have not seen that ever.
390
00:13:13,751 --> 00:13:15,586
Oh, sweet!
391
00:13:15,670 --> 00:13:16,754
My kind of scene!
392
00:13:16,838 --> 00:13:18,548
What are you waiting for?
393
00:13:18,631 --> 00:13:20,133
Call me.
394
00:13:20,216 --> 00:13:22,260
Why be alone tonight?
395
00:13:22,343 --> 00:13:24,137
Just pick up the phone.
396
00:13:24,220 --> 00:13:25,888
I'm waiting for you.
397
00:13:25,972 --> 00:13:27,807
What's your sleep number?
398
00:13:27,890 --> 00:13:30,768
I'm just a phone call away.
399
00:13:30,852 --> 00:13:33,521
Welcome to the Rusty's invisible harem.
400
00:13:33,604 --> 00:13:36,607
My name is Id, and I am master here.
401
00:13:36,691 --> 00:13:37,775
If I knew you were hiding this,
402
00:13:37,859 --> 00:13:40,403
I would not have been hanging
out with him the whole time.
403
00:13:40,486 --> 00:13:41,529
Ha-ha-ha!
404
00:13:41,612 --> 00:13:42,905
These ladies are not for you.
405
00:13:42,989 --> 00:13:44,699
They are for The Rusty.
406
00:13:44,782 --> 00:13:46,701
The Rusty could have any of these women
407
00:13:46,784 --> 00:13:48,453
if he just put in the effort.
408
00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:50,121
Lindsay Wagner? Really?
409
00:13:50,204 --> 00:13:51,039
Yes!
410
00:13:51,122 --> 00:13:53,124
The Rusty met Lindsay Wagner at a party.
411
00:13:53,207 --> 00:13:55,376
She was totally into The Rusty.
412
00:13:55,460 --> 00:13:57,086
Witty banter was shared.
413
00:13:57,170 --> 00:13:59,589
But The Rusty did not seal the deal.
414
00:13:59,672 --> 00:14:02,300
This was because The Rusty was tired.
415
00:14:02,383 --> 00:14:03,926
Only because of this--
416
00:14:04,010 --> 00:14:07,013
We only seek passage to master control.
417
00:14:07,096 --> 00:14:10,475
My friends and I do not
desire The Rusty's women.
418
00:14:10,558 --> 00:14:11,559
Ha-ha-ha!
419
00:14:11,642 --> 00:14:13,144
You could not have these women.
420
00:14:13,227 --> 00:14:15,021
You lack the flair of The Rusty.
421
00:14:15,104 --> 00:14:18,024
You have not the skill and
rakish good looks of The Rusty.
422
00:14:18,107 --> 00:14:19,734
Yes, Master Id.
423
00:14:19,817 --> 00:14:24,113
I have seen The Rusty work
his exquisite juju with women.
424
00:14:24,197 --> 00:14:26,240
It is a thing of beauty.
425
00:14:26,324 --> 00:14:28,326
Ah! You speak the truth.
426
00:14:28,409 --> 00:14:31,037
I will show you to the
next level of The Rusty,
427
00:14:31,120 --> 00:14:33,039
but only if you please me.
428
00:14:33,122 --> 00:14:36,417
We shall do your bidding.
429
00:14:36,501 --> 00:14:38,169
The flying baby shall make love
430
00:14:38,252 --> 00:14:39,587
to the black specter.
431
00:14:39,670 --> 00:14:40,755
Yes, yes!
432
00:14:40,838 --> 00:14:43,299
They shall make sweet,
sensual love for me.
433
00:14:43,383 --> 00:14:44,759
- Oh, no way!
- Out of the question.
434
00:14:44,842 --> 00:14:46,761
Oh, you ask too much of us, Master Id.
435
00:14:46,844 --> 00:14:49,263
This is Thanatos and Eros.
436
00:14:49,347 --> 00:14:50,807
They are love and death.
437
00:14:50,890 --> 00:14:53,309
To have them copulate is impossible.
438
00:14:53,393 --> 00:14:54,644
Huge understatement.
439
00:14:54,727 --> 00:14:55,978
Then they shall merely kiss.
440
00:14:56,062 --> 00:14:58,398
And they shall use their tongues.
441
00:14:58,481 --> 00:15:00,108
This, I command!
442
00:15:00,191 --> 00:15:01,776
I'll do it if he does.
443
00:15:01,859 --> 00:15:02,735
Yeah, I bet you will.
444
00:15:02,819 --> 00:15:04,028
Oh, yeah. Like I want to do it.
445
00:15:04,112 --> 00:15:06,114
And there shall be laughing and mirth.
446
00:15:06,197 --> 00:15:08,241
And also ass grabbing.
447
00:15:08,324 --> 00:15:10,159
Dude, just do it!
He's upping the ante!
448
00:15:10,243 --> 00:15:11,786
Will you just kiss me already?!
449
00:15:11,869 --> 00:15:13,329
Time is of the essence!
450
00:15:13,413 --> 00:15:14,872
I demand kissing!
451
00:15:14,956 --> 00:15:19,252
And also I demand at least second base!
452
00:15:19,335 --> 00:15:20,503
Oh, come on.
453
00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:23,840
You think the Monarch Mind Infractor
is the only mess he's gotten me into?
454
00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:26,175
21:
He calls it the Monarch Mind Infractor?
455
00:15:26,259 --> 00:15:27,927
Why not the Monarch Mind Machine,
456
00:15:28,010 --> 00:15:29,929
or the Monarch Mind Mutilator?
457
00:15:30,012 --> 00:15:31,806
Because that is way cooler.
458
00:15:31,889 --> 00:15:33,391
Oh, it has alliteration.
459
00:15:33,474 --> 00:15:35,643
I know. But that's the Monarch.
460
00:15:35,726 --> 00:15:36,811
Oh, thank you.
461
00:15:36,894 --> 00:15:37,854
We must drink.
462
00:15:37,937 --> 00:15:40,064
This is Tranya.
463
00:15:40,148 --> 00:15:42,817
I hope you relish it as much as I.
464
00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:44,819
Oh, my God!
465
00:15:44,902 --> 00:15:46,279
You know the corbomite maneuver!
466
00:15:46,362 --> 00:15:48,781
Sure. I used to love the old Star Treks.
467
00:15:48,865 --> 00:15:51,075
It's kind of hard to forget
Ron Howard's brother.
468
00:15:51,159 --> 00:15:54,370
Right? He was such a creepy kid.
469
00:15:54,454 --> 00:15:56,956
You act like I wanted
to make out with you.
470
00:15:57,039 --> 00:15:58,499
You did! You were into it!
471
00:15:58,583 --> 00:16:00,501
You grabbed my nipple!
472
00:16:00,585 --> 00:16:02,712
That's what second base is! I had to!
473
00:16:02,795 --> 00:16:04,839
Gentlemen, please.
474
00:16:04,922 --> 00:16:08,509
I presume you are The Rusty's ego?
475
00:16:08,593 --> 00:16:09,844
You got it.
476
00:16:09,927 --> 00:16:11,137
And the little guy's Eros,
477
00:16:11,220 --> 00:16:13,848
the jerk who made
The Rusty join Match.com.
478
00:16:13,931 --> 00:16:15,892
He's got to at least
try to get some loving.
479
00:16:15,975 --> 00:16:17,852
And the one with the umbrella is Thanatos,
480
00:16:17,935 --> 00:16:20,980
the jerk who made
The Rusty quit Match.com.
481
00:16:21,063 --> 00:16:23,858
Hey, many of these women
could be murderous gold diggers,
482
00:16:23,941 --> 00:16:25,985
or, at the very least,
carriers of chlamydia.
483
00:16:26,068 --> 00:16:28,571
You want me to help these two?
They're my biggest problem.
484
00:16:28,654 --> 00:16:30,198
And those rotten things.
485
00:16:30,281 --> 00:16:31,866
Scat! Shoo!
486
00:16:31,949 --> 00:16:33,868
Whoever you are, get out.
487
00:16:33,951 --> 00:16:36,621
We want only passage to master control
488
00:16:36,704 --> 00:16:37,955
to save The Rusty.
489
00:16:38,039 --> 00:16:40,333
He has been taken over by an intruder.
490
00:16:40,416 --> 00:16:43,127
If you help us, we are at your bidding.
491
00:16:43,211 --> 00:16:45,296
Oh, you want to get to the next level?
492
00:16:45,379 --> 00:16:49,247
Okay. Help me fix this.
493
00:16:49,425 --> 00:16:51,928
The guy was all but
crawling already, mind you,
494
00:16:52,011 --> 00:16:54,972
but the boy was still able to
squeeze off two good leg shots.
495
00:16:55,056 --> 00:16:56,015
Hank did that?
496
00:16:56,098 --> 00:16:59,185
Yeah, for a... Hank, he's not a bad shot.
497
00:16:59,268 --> 00:17:00,770
Thanks to me.
498
00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:02,438
You guys! Dean's hurt or something!
499
00:17:02,522 --> 00:17:04,649
He's running around the yard screaming!
500
00:17:04,732 --> 00:17:05,900
Come on!
501
00:17:05,983 --> 00:17:07,235
I'll deal with this.
502
00:17:07,318 --> 00:17:11,185
Hell no! I'll deal with this.
503
00:17:12,949 --> 00:17:14,909
Why are you not insane yet?!
504
00:17:14,992 --> 00:17:16,619
What does it take?!
505
00:17:16,702 --> 00:17:18,412
[SIGHS]
506
00:17:18,496 --> 00:17:20,581
Fuck, it is getting hot in here!
507
00:17:20,665 --> 00:17:22,208
[FLATINE]
508
00:17:22,291 --> 00:17:23,918
[SLURRING]
And then he just ran away
509
00:17:24,001 --> 00:17:26,295
and I'm standing there
for like three hours
510
00:17:26,379 --> 00:17:27,922
before I just left.
511
00:17:28,005 --> 00:17:29,006
[SLURRING]
Did you ever think, like,
512
00:17:29,090 --> 00:17:30,091
maybe you could do better?
513
00:17:30,174 --> 00:17:31,175
I dunno.
514
00:17:31,259 --> 00:17:32,927
Can you do better than a man you adore
515
00:17:33,010 --> 00:17:34,929
and who really needs you?
516
00:17:35,012 --> 00:17:36,806
Well, maybe like a man who needs you
517
00:17:36,889 --> 00:17:39,934
and would treat you like the
amazing woman you are --
518
00:17:40,017 --> 00:17:41,352
like a perfect beauty center
519
00:17:41,435 --> 00:17:45,106
with a coating made
of perfect-smart candy.
520
00:17:45,189 --> 00:17:46,566
Someone like that.
521
00:17:46,649 --> 00:17:48,568
Oh, come on. That's silly.
522
00:17:48,651 --> 00:17:50,194
Like who?
523
00:17:50,278 --> 00:17:52,363
Oh, maybe like...
524
00:17:52,446 --> 00:17:54,353
like me.
525
00:17:56,075 --> 00:17:59,078
I-I-It just keeps falling apart.
526
00:17:59,161 --> 00:18:00,454
Where's the Dracula guy?
527
00:18:00,538 --> 00:18:01,831
How do you know that guy?
528
00:18:01,914 --> 00:18:02,957
Just showed up.
529
00:18:03,040 --> 00:18:04,834
Hey, don't you have any glue or something?
530
00:18:04,917 --> 00:18:05,960
I'm back!
531
00:18:06,043 --> 00:18:07,420
And I've brought help.
532
00:18:07,503 --> 00:18:08,462
Who are they?
533
00:18:08,546 --> 00:18:10,506
They are here to assist your labors.
534
00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:11,966
You must believe me.
535
00:18:12,049 --> 00:18:14,844
They can help mend your little boy.
536
00:18:14,927 --> 00:18:16,804
Yeah? Okay.
537
00:18:16,887 --> 00:18:18,848
Then you may pass.
538
00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:20,808
[ALL GASP]
539
00:18:20,891 --> 00:18:22,768
Dude, how did you get those from the Id?
540
00:18:22,852 --> 00:18:24,979
I beg you not to ask.
541
00:18:25,062 --> 00:18:26,397
Aah! Oh! Get them off!
542
00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:28,357
Oh, please! Oh, my gosh!
543
00:18:28,441 --> 00:18:29,942
What's going on?!
544
00:18:30,026 --> 00:18:30,985
Don't look at me.
545
00:18:31,068 --> 00:18:32,987
Hank and I are just
tossing the ball around,
546
00:18:33,070 --> 00:18:34,989
then this guy starts
running around like that.
547
00:18:35,072 --> 00:18:36,824
Take it easy, Dean. What happened?
548
00:18:36,907 --> 00:18:37,992
I don't know!
549
00:18:38,075 --> 00:18:38,993
Just make it stop!
550
00:18:39,076 --> 00:18:40,077
It's burning!
551
00:18:40,161 --> 00:18:42,663
Hello! Here's your problem.
552
00:18:42,747 --> 00:18:45,249
Genius here has a whole
ant colony on his ass.
553
00:18:45,333 --> 00:18:46,292
Oh, geez, Dean.
554
00:18:46,375 --> 00:18:48,461
You sat in the black dirt, didn't you?
555
00:18:48,544 --> 00:18:50,004
And solved.
556
00:18:50,087 --> 00:18:51,172
Okay, who's up for another game?
557
00:18:51,255 --> 00:18:52,882
What was that?!
558
00:18:52,965 --> 00:18:55,676
Oh, relax. It's just Sprite.
559
00:18:55,760 --> 00:18:59,055
Sprite?! That's sugar! They eat that.
560
00:18:59,138 --> 00:19:00,973
You just fed the ants.
561
00:19:01,057 --> 00:19:02,975
Aaaaah!
562
00:19:03,059 --> 00:19:04,018
Am I going through menopause,
563
00:19:04,101 --> 00:19:05,686
or is it getting really hot in here?
564
00:19:05,770 --> 00:19:07,730
The Rusty is dying.
565
00:19:07,813 --> 00:19:08,773
We may be too late!
566
00:19:08,856 --> 00:19:10,358
The Rusty is dying?
567
00:19:10,441 --> 00:19:11,901
And you came for my help?
568
00:19:11,984 --> 00:19:14,153
Well, aren't you the super ego?
569
00:19:14,236 --> 00:19:15,112
[CHUCKLES]
570
00:19:15,196 --> 00:19:17,031
Of course, good man. It's just...
571
00:19:17,114 --> 00:19:19,575
It's just that I haven't been
called upon in quite some time.
572
00:19:19,659 --> 00:19:21,035
Then rally!
573
00:19:21,118 --> 00:19:24,163
You are what is strong
and true in The Rusty!
574
00:19:24,246 --> 00:19:25,956
Get us to master control,
575
00:19:26,040 --> 00:19:28,292
and help us banish the intruder!
576
00:19:28,376 --> 00:19:29,418
That's it?
577
00:19:29,502 --> 00:19:31,587
Easy!
578
00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:33,923
Master control.
579
00:19:34,006 --> 00:19:35,800
That easy.
580
00:19:35,883 --> 00:19:38,803
Whoa! All the doors are open!
581
00:19:38,886 --> 00:19:39,637
That's new.
582
00:19:39,720 --> 00:19:41,180
Well, every door but that one,
583
00:19:41,263 --> 00:19:42,848
and it's the only door I can't open.
584
00:19:42,932 --> 00:19:44,058
Looks like we're gonna die.
585
00:19:44,141 --> 00:19:45,059
Knew it.
586
00:19:45,142 --> 00:19:47,061
Is there any other way in?
587
00:19:47,144 --> 00:19:50,064
Theoretically, if you could get through
the tragic-memory ducts,
588
00:19:50,147 --> 00:19:51,190
they lead everywhere.
589
00:19:51,273 --> 00:19:52,441
Capital!
590
00:19:52,525 --> 00:19:54,068
I have an idea.
591
00:19:54,151 --> 00:19:56,612
You will go to the origin of these ducts,
592
00:19:56,696 --> 00:19:58,114
and you must bring Eros.
593
00:19:58,197 --> 00:20:02,201
Your strength and
his love will be the bait.
594
00:20:02,284 --> 00:20:04,078
Once you reach the duct,
595
00:20:04,161 --> 00:20:07,623
you two will combine your...
596
00:20:07,707 --> 00:20:10,376
- Daddy?
- Daddy?
597
00:20:10,459 --> 00:20:13,170
Daddy?
598
00:20:13,254 --> 00:20:15,172
What the?
599
00:20:15,256 --> 00:20:17,383
Aah! Ew! No!
600
00:20:17,466 --> 00:20:18,926
Get the hell away from me!
601
00:20:19,009 --> 00:20:22,513
No! No! No-o-o-o-o!
602
00:20:22,596 --> 00:20:24,974
[PANTING]
603
00:20:25,057 --> 00:20:27,935
W-W-What's going on?
604
00:20:28,018 --> 00:20:29,812
- Nothing.
- Anymore.
605
00:20:29,895 --> 00:20:32,106
HATRED:
Oh, that is humiliating.
606
00:20:32,189 --> 00:20:34,859
Y-Y-You can't just
hose him like a convict.
607
00:20:34,942 --> 00:20:36,110
Oh, will you stop it?
608
00:20:36,193 --> 00:20:37,820
The kid's got ants on his ass!
609
00:20:37,903 --> 00:20:39,822
This is how you deal with the problem!
610
00:20:39,905 --> 00:20:41,824
Those boys are not your problem, Samson!
611
00:20:41,907 --> 00:20:43,200
They're my problem!
612
00:20:43,284 --> 00:20:44,785
You're both wrong.
613
00:20:44,869 --> 00:20:47,121
Those boys are my problem.
614
00:20:47,204 --> 00:20:48,998
Brock, turn off the hose.
615
00:20:49,081 --> 00:20:51,333
Dean, get up and get in the shower.
616
00:20:51,417 --> 00:20:53,043
Hank, stop giggling at your brother.
617
00:20:53,127 --> 00:20:55,129
Hatred, what the hell is
connected to my chest?
618
00:20:55,212 --> 00:20:56,756
And Shoreleave...
619
00:20:56,839 --> 00:20:59,633
I don't know, go do... something.
620
00:20:59,717 --> 00:21:03,179
Ugh. I have a huge headache.
621
00:21:05,264 --> 00:21:08,267
[UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS]
622
00:21:32,500 --> 00:21:33,626
Are you okay?
623
00:21:33,709 --> 00:21:35,377
Dr. O said you're probably insane now
624
00:21:35,461 --> 00:21:37,379
and that you'll never be the same.
625
00:21:37,463 --> 00:21:38,798
[CHUCKLES]
626
00:21:38,881 --> 00:21:39,924
Are you kidding?
627
00:21:40,007 --> 00:21:41,300
[SIGHS]
628
00:21:41,383 --> 00:21:44,178
Okay, I'm just turning 16
629
00:21:44,261 --> 00:21:46,180
and having a birthday pool party.
630
00:21:46,263 --> 00:21:48,641
My father invites every girl he knows,
631
00:21:48,724 --> 00:21:50,726
and I'm not talking about girls my age.
632
00:21:50,810 --> 00:21:52,186
No, not Jonas.
633
00:21:52,269 --> 00:21:55,189
He invites Playboy bunnies and models
634
00:21:55,272 --> 00:21:57,066
and, I think, actual whores --
635
00:21:57,149 --> 00:21:58,484
you know, real prostitutes.
636
00:21:58,567 --> 00:22:01,195
So there I am in my giant bathing suit
637
00:22:01,278 --> 00:22:03,697
with nervous puberty
638
00:22:03,781 --> 00:22:06,200
oozing out of my gigantic pores.
639
00:22:06,283 --> 00:22:07,868
Just-- Just awful.
640
00:22:07,952 --> 00:22:09,995
So, the band suddenly stops playing
641
00:22:10,079 --> 00:22:11,455
and I hear
642
00:22:11,539 --> 00:22:15,209
"And now the man of
the hour, Rusty Venture!"
643
00:22:15,292 --> 00:22:17,169
All eyes on me, right?
644
00:22:17,253 --> 00:22:19,296
Then suddenly, almost predictably,
645
00:22:19,380 --> 00:22:22,424
The Action Man shoots
my groin with a shrink ray
646
00:22:22,508 --> 00:22:24,510
right as that fucking
jackass Colonel Gentleman
647
00:22:24,593 --> 00:22:26,512
pulls my shorts down.
648
00:22:26,595 --> 00:22:28,848
Wow. That's like a nightmare.
649
00:22:28,931 --> 00:22:30,224
Oh, no! No!
650
00:22:30,307 --> 00:22:33,060
What I went through today
was "like a nightmare."
651
00:22:33,143 --> 00:22:38,023
What happened when
I was 16, that is my life.
652
00:22:38,073 --> 00:22:42,623
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