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1
00:00:45,547 --> 00:00:47,673
- Aw. He's using his jacket
2
00:00:47,674 --> 00:00:49,717
as some kind of
security blanket.
3
00:00:49,718 --> 00:00:51,552
- That's so cute and pathetic.
4
00:00:51,553 --> 00:00:54,847
- It really is.
You do you, weirdo!
5
00:00:54,848 --> 00:00:57,391
- Oh, hey, guys. I'm just
sucking on my jacket.
6
00:00:57,392 --> 00:00:59,768
A Clump-O-Honey candy
got stuck right there
7
00:00:59,769 --> 00:01:02,521
over a thousand years ago,
and I can still taste it.
8
00:01:02,522 --> 00:01:04,940
- You know who I bet
would like some of that?
9
00:01:04,941 --> 00:01:06,275
Me! Zoidberg.
10
00:01:08,153 --> 00:01:10,362
Oh, no!
11
00:01:10,363 --> 00:01:12,448
Zoidberg, you residue hog!
12
00:01:12,449 --> 00:01:14,658
Now all I taste is crab juice.
13
00:01:14,659 --> 00:01:16,869
- So, buy another jacket candy.
14
00:01:16,870 --> 00:01:18,913
- I can't. They
stopped making it
15
00:01:18,914 --> 00:01:22,041
after it got reclassified
as industrial glue.
16
00:01:22,042 --> 00:01:25,419
- Ah. Then I, Bender,
will recreate the recipe.
17
00:01:25,420 --> 00:01:28,423
Don't forget, I came in
third on MasterChef Junior.
18
00:01:32,510 --> 00:01:34,511
- May I have a taste?
19
00:01:34,512 --> 00:01:37,306
- Sure. You seem like the
kind of guy who has a mouth.
20
00:01:38,642 --> 00:01:41,810
- Whoa! Diabetic coma!
21
00:01:41,811 --> 00:01:44,731
- Hm. I better add some
sugar to make it less sweet.
22
00:01:46,524 --> 00:01:49,068
- And just a touch of treacle
23
00:01:49,069 --> 00:01:52,196
to remind me of my dear
departed Aunt Juanita.
24
00:01:52,197 --> 00:01:54,740
She
drowned in treacle.
25
00:01:54,741 --> 00:01:57,743
- You know I'm
dying on the floor.
26
00:02:03,250 --> 00:02:05,626
So, what do you think?
27
00:02:05,627 --> 00:02:08,963
- Mm! It's perfect, Bender.
Totally jacket worthy.
28
00:02:08,964 --> 00:02:11,131
It's a little sticky.
29
00:02:11,132 --> 00:02:12,925
It's
a lot sticky!
30
00:02:14,594 --> 00:02:17,471
And there's
something hard in it.
31
00:02:20,100 --> 00:02:23,686
- Luckily, I'm an expert
at fixing human beak bones.
32
00:02:23,687 --> 00:02:26,438
Are you free Friday for
an expensive appointment?
33
00:02:26,439 --> 00:02:28,942
- Let me check. Open calendar!
34
00:02:30,569 --> 00:02:32,736
Shmeird. There's
some old alert
35
00:02:32,737 --> 00:02:34,989
I set up 20 years ago.
36
00:02:34,990 --> 00:02:37,158
Our babies?!
37
00:02:38,785 --> 00:02:40,244
- It's time, my love.
38
00:02:40,245 --> 00:02:42,037
- Oh, Kif!
39
00:02:42,038 --> 00:02:43,706
- The hell are
you talking about?
40
00:02:43,707 --> 00:02:46,041
Something to do with
the meatbag life cycle?
41
00:02:46,042 --> 00:02:48,127
- That's right,
Bender. Many years ago,
42
00:02:48,128 --> 00:02:50,546
I gave birth to a
clutch of tadpoles
43
00:02:50,547 --> 00:02:52,339
with Amy by my side.
44
00:02:52,340 --> 00:02:54,800
- I have video of the
birth. Wanna see it?
45
00:02:54,801 --> 00:02:55,968
No!
46
00:02:55,969 --> 00:02:58,388
- That is the wrong
kind of delivery!
47
00:03:00,390 --> 00:03:03,142
Oh, Nelly! Oh!
48
00:03:07,647 --> 00:03:09,523
- Life is disgusting.
49
00:03:09,524 --> 00:03:11,525
- No, it was beautiful.
50
00:03:11,526 --> 00:03:14,028
But I was so not
prepared to be a mother.
51
00:03:14,029 --> 00:03:16,030
- In 20 years,
they'll sprout legs
52
00:03:16,031 --> 00:03:18,909
and crawl back onto
land as children.
53
00:03:19,618 --> 00:03:21,578
- I'll be ready then.
54
00:03:22,746 --> 00:03:25,247
- Well, Amy, are you ready now?
55
00:03:25,248 --> 00:03:27,124
- Having a family with you
56
00:03:27,125 --> 00:03:30,502
is the only thing I
want in the whole world.
57
00:03:30,503 --> 00:03:32,838
- Then can I have your car?
- No!
58
00:03:32,839 --> 00:03:34,590
- Too late. I
already crashed it.
59
00:03:41,765 --> 00:03:43,140
- Oh, this is so exciting!
60
00:03:43,141 --> 00:03:45,601
The birth ceremony
will begin any minute.
61
00:03:45,602 --> 00:03:47,562
- Thanks for the warning.
62
00:03:48,521 --> 00:03:50,689
And don't describe it
to me!
63
00:03:50,690 --> 00:03:53,108
- We're here!
- Mom! Dad!
64
00:03:53,109 --> 00:03:55,319
Oh, I'm so glad you made it!
65
00:03:55,320 --> 00:03:58,155
- Oh, we wouldn't miss the
birth of our grandbabies
66
00:03:58,156 --> 00:03:59,782
for a million dollars.
67
00:03:59,783 --> 00:04:01,951
- 'Cause we're so rich,
that's like a penny.
68
00:04:04,955 --> 00:04:07,581
- Oh, my. It's
the Grand Midwife.
69
00:04:07,582 --> 00:04:10,125
- I am the Grand Midwife!
70
00:04:10,126 --> 00:04:11,794
- Big fan!
71
00:04:11,795 --> 00:04:14,088
- I am Kif of the clan Kroker.
72
00:04:14,089 --> 00:04:16,423
- I know. I recognize your head.
73
00:04:16,424 --> 00:04:18,509
- And this is my smizmar, Amy.
74
00:04:18,510 --> 00:04:20,970
We have come to
receive our offspring.
75
00:04:20,971 --> 00:04:23,264
- As you transition
to parenthood,
76
00:04:23,265 --> 00:04:25,891
I shall be your
counsel and guide.
77
00:04:25,892 --> 00:04:29,228
I do so out of solemn
respect for our traditions
78
00:04:29,229 --> 00:04:31,772
and not for any
optional cash donation
79
00:04:31,773 --> 00:04:33,857
people sometimes
place in that basket.
80
00:04:33,858 --> 00:04:35,234
- Thank you.
- It's green,
81
00:04:35,235 --> 00:04:37,487
and there's a little sign on it.
- Found it!
82
00:04:39,656 --> 00:04:42,908
- Then the Emergence
shall now commence!
83
00:04:47,122 --> 00:04:49,707
Or not. It's unpredictable.
84
00:04:49,708 --> 00:04:52,751
Guess I'll have to wing it.
Anybody here from out of town?
85
00:04:52,752 --> 00:04:54,712
O-oh!
Here they come.
86
00:05:02,470 --> 00:05:06,223
- Oh my. I'm so anxious, my
camouflage reflex is kicking in.
87
00:05:06,224 --> 00:05:07,725
- No, it's helpful.
88
00:05:07,726 --> 00:05:10,227
I wanna look cute for
our hundreds of kids.
89
00:05:11,813 --> 00:05:15,190
- We shall now stand
by, without interfering,
90
00:05:15,191 --> 00:05:18,319
as we observe the sacred
process known as...
91
00:05:18,320 --> 00:05:19,737
the Winnowing.
92
00:05:19,738 --> 00:05:21,155
- What's that mean?
93
00:05:21,156 --> 00:05:23,240
- It means don't
start naming them yet.
94
00:05:40,217 --> 00:05:41,717
- Four of them made it!
95
00:05:43,136 --> 00:05:44,762
Well, three and a half.
96
00:05:44,763 --> 00:05:47,306
- Young creatures
of the Black Lagoon,
97
00:05:47,307 --> 00:05:49,308
go now to your parents.
98
00:05:52,854 --> 00:05:54,688
- Uh, can I help you?
99
00:05:54,689 --> 00:05:55,941
- Over here!
100
00:05:59,277 --> 00:06:02,279
They're perfect.
101
00:06:02,280 --> 00:06:04,406
- Ew. She's touching them.
102
00:06:04,407 --> 00:06:07,409
- Cherish these
children, Kif and Amy,
103
00:06:07,410 --> 00:06:09,579
for they are beautiful.
104
00:06:11,623 --> 00:06:12,623
Eh...
105
00:06:12,624 --> 00:06:15,584
- Well, in-in the sense that
all children are beautiful.
106
00:06:24,970 --> 00:06:27,346
The transformation is complete!
107
00:06:27,347 --> 00:06:30,891
We welcome these new
beings of the land.
108
00:06:32,602 --> 00:06:35,104
- They can call
me Captain Uncle.
109
00:06:35,105 --> 00:06:38,524
- Uh, I'll go dispose
of this medical waste.
110
00:06:38,525 --> 00:06:40,819
With a little butter and lemon.
111
00:06:41,444 --> 00:06:43,654
- Want a picture with the kids?
- No need.
112
00:06:43,655 --> 00:06:45,823
The way they look is
burned into my mind.
113
00:06:45,824 --> 00:06:48,534
- They're nice, you know?
Just a kinda little...
114
00:06:48,535 --> 00:06:49,827
- Super gross.
115
00:06:49,828 --> 00:06:52,413
- But, you're
finally grandparents.
116
00:06:52,414 --> 00:06:54,207
- That'll be our little secret.
117
00:07:05,051 --> 00:07:06,928
Oh my.
118
00:07:09,055 --> 00:07:11,807
- Thanks for bringing the
kids by for my lunch break.
119
00:07:11,808 --> 00:07:14,101
- They're the sweetest
thing on the menu.
120
00:07:14,102 --> 00:07:15,022
Not even close!
121
00:07:16,479 --> 00:07:17,980
- Uh, question.
122
00:07:17,981 --> 00:07:20,984
These three babies are
totally different sizes.
123
00:07:21,818 --> 00:07:22,902
Question mark.
124
00:07:22,903 --> 00:07:25,237
- Oh, well, they
grew at varying rates
125
00:07:25,238 --> 00:07:27,823
depending on the temperature
of the water they were in.
126
00:07:27,824 --> 00:07:31,118
Little Newt here was
in a cold, deep area.
127
00:07:31,119 --> 00:07:33,370
- Mama!
- Wrong again.
128
00:07:34,497 --> 00:07:37,207
- Mandy is from the
temperate middle depths.
129
00:07:37,208 --> 00:07:38,792
- He's shrively!
130
00:07:38,793 --> 00:07:41,170
You haven't
seen the half of it.
131
00:07:41,171 --> 00:07:43,380
- And Axl is from
the warm shallows,
132
00:07:43,381 --> 00:07:45,216
just like his old man.
133
00:07:45,217 --> 00:07:48,093
Do you always
have to talk about me?
134
00:07:48,094 --> 00:07:50,554
- So why does this one
keep calling me Mama?
135
00:07:50,555 --> 00:07:52,306
And what's with
the big weird eye?
136
00:07:52,307 --> 00:07:54,600
- It's not weird.
It looks like yours.
137
00:07:54,601 --> 00:07:55,935
It's pretty weird.
138
00:07:55,936 --> 00:07:57,436
- Why would he look like me?
139
00:07:57,437 --> 00:07:58,896
- Don't you remember?
140
00:07:58,897 --> 00:08:01,607
Twenty years ago,
you impregnated Kif.
141
00:08:01,608 --> 00:08:03,943
- Seriously? Oh, my God.
142
00:08:03,944 --> 00:08:05,736
I must have been super drunk.
143
00:08:05,737 --> 00:08:09,114
- Leela, you bone brain!
You didn't have sex.
144
00:08:09,115 --> 00:08:11,116
Bone.
145
00:08:11,117 --> 00:08:13,535
- Luckily, there's
an educational movie
146
00:08:13,536 --> 00:08:17,081
that explains how Kif's
species reproduces.
147
00:08:17,082 --> 00:08:18,832
And it's filthy.
148
00:08:18,833 --> 00:08:22,002
YowzaVision
Educational Films
149
00:08:22,003 --> 00:08:25,506
presents Sex Across
The Universe.
150
00:08:25,507 --> 00:08:28,342
Oh, yeah!
Educate me, baby.
151
00:08:28,343 --> 00:08:30,595
This week,
the Amphibiosans.
152
00:08:31,346 --> 00:08:33,889
For every organism
across the universe,
153
00:08:33,890 --> 00:08:37,560
reproduction is a
steamy, erotic process.
154
00:08:37,561 --> 00:08:40,145
Except the Amphibiosans.
155
00:08:40,146 --> 00:08:42,356
They just barely touch hands
156
00:08:42,357 --> 00:08:45,067
while the rest of us
are gettin' it on.
157
00:08:45,068 --> 00:08:47,194
Yowza.
158
00:08:47,195 --> 00:08:48,612
Eh, that
was pretty hot.
159
00:08:48,613 --> 00:08:51,240
- So, you see, Amy
was my smizmar,
160
00:08:51,241 --> 00:08:54,827
the one whose mere presence
made me receptive to pregnancy.
161
00:08:54,828 --> 00:08:57,913
- Which makes me their smizmama.
162
00:08:57,914 --> 00:09:01,208
- But it was Lila who
contributed the DNA
163
00:09:01,209 --> 00:09:04,253
when she accidentally
touched Kif's hand.
164
00:09:04,254 --> 00:09:06,130
- Are you sure I wasn't drunk?
165
00:09:06,131 --> 00:09:08,716
I-I mean, I'm drunk
now.
166
00:09:08,717 --> 00:09:10,217
- Mwah!
167
00:09:10,218 --> 00:09:11,886
- Ew! Mom, Dad!
168
00:09:11,887 --> 00:09:13,721
Leela!
169
00:09:13,722 --> 00:09:17,559
♪ Will you stay in
our lovers' story? ♪
170
00:09:18,226 --> 00:09:21,186
♪ If you stay, you
won't be sorry ♪
171
00:09:21,187 --> 00:09:23,564
♪ 'Cause we believe in you ♪
172
00:09:25,150 --> 00:09:28,861
♪ Soon you'll grow,
so take a chance ♪
173
00:09:28,862 --> 00:09:33,575
♪ With a couple of kooks
hung up on romancing ♪
174
00:09:34,326 --> 00:09:38,162
♪ Will you stay in
our lovers' story? ♪
175
00:09:38,163 --> 00:09:41,749
♪ If you stay, you
won't be sorry ♪
176
00:09:41,750 --> 00:09:43,667
♪ 'Cause we believe in you ♪
177
00:09:45,295 --> 00:09:48,714
♪ Soon, you'll grow,
so take a chance ♪
178
00:09:48,715 --> 00:09:50,841
♪ With a couple of kooks ♪
179
00:09:50,842 --> 00:09:53,761
♪ Hung up on romancing ♪
180
00:09:57,515 --> 00:10:00,226
- Let's reinflate
my head and go home.
181
00:10:00,227 --> 00:10:04,188
- Yeah. Maybe they'll conk out
and we'll get a little us time.
182
00:10:09,986 --> 00:10:13,073
Those little guys are
the best, but they're a lot.
183
00:10:14,074 --> 00:10:16,576
- Well, luckily, there's
two of us to split the work.
184
00:10:17,827 --> 00:10:19,870
♪ Doop, doo-doo-doop,
doop, doop, doop, doop! ♪
185
00:10:19,871 --> 00:10:22,039
- Captain Brannigan!
At your service, sir.
186
00:10:22,040 --> 00:10:25,417
- With ease, Lieutenant. I have
a bit of news to say at you.
187
00:10:25,418 --> 00:10:28,379
- Is it about the baby gifts you claim
you sent? Because we still haven't...
188
00:10:28,380 --> 00:10:30,130
- I'm afraid there's
no time to discuss
189
00:10:30,131 --> 00:10:32,925
the many presents I bought,
some of which are large.
190
00:10:32,926 --> 00:10:35,261
Soldier, you are ordered
to report for duty.
191
00:10:36,263 --> 00:10:39,640
- Is it war?
- I hope so, but we're not sure.
192
00:10:39,641 --> 00:10:42,434
All we know is that DOOP
has lost radio contact
193
00:10:42,435 --> 00:10:46,063
with a remote outpost in
Ursa Major. Over and under.
194
00:10:48,400 --> 00:10:50,734
- I'm sorry you'll have
to handle the kids alone.
195
00:10:50,735 --> 00:10:52,236
I'm not worried.
196
00:10:58,785 --> 00:11:00,452
I love you!
197
00:11:24,269 --> 00:11:26,145
- Roll call!
198
00:11:26,146 --> 00:11:29,607
"Four eyes."
"One-eye." "Crab man."
199
00:11:29,608 --> 00:11:32,026
"Can man." "Who cares?"
200
00:11:32,027 --> 00:11:33,777
Dammit! Where's Amy?
201
00:11:33,778 --> 00:11:35,779
What do I need, a bigger antler?
202
00:11:35,780 --> 00:11:38,490
Oh, I'm so, so sorry.
203
00:11:38,491 --> 00:11:40,159
The babysitter didn't show up.
204
00:11:40,160 --> 00:11:42,077
Ah!
205
00:11:42,078 --> 00:11:45,247
- Finally. Where are you?
- Sorry, toots.
206
00:11:45,248 --> 00:11:46,916
I must have the address wrong.
207
00:11:46,917 --> 00:11:49,335
784 West 28th Street?
208
00:11:49,336 --> 00:11:52,087
Uh-huh. Weird,
th-that's what I got.
209
00:11:52,088 --> 00:11:53,881
Oh, Earth! Ah!
210
00:11:53,882 --> 00:11:56,550
Coulda swore you
said Kepler 10B.
211
00:11:58,053 --> 00:12:01,680
Guess I'll catch the next
generation ship back to Nutley.
212
00:12:01,681 --> 00:12:03,515
- Oh...
213
00:12:03,516 --> 00:12:06,644
- Mom, Mom, Mom! Can you
judge our whispering contest?
214
00:12:06,645 --> 00:12:08,145
Okay. You ready?
215
00:12:08,146 --> 00:12:11,190
I lose!
216
00:12:11,191 --> 00:12:12,524
Oh, come on! Oh...
217
00:12:17,822 --> 00:12:21,242
- Look at me, chugging
mineral water on a weeknight!
218
00:12:21,243 --> 00:12:23,285
So wild and free!
219
00:12:25,372 --> 00:12:27,414
I miss them so.
220
00:12:27,415 --> 00:12:29,333
- I feel you, soldier.
221
00:12:29,334 --> 00:12:32,294
And not in a handsy
way this time.
222
00:12:32,295 --> 00:12:33,754
Mm.
223
00:12:33,755 --> 00:12:35,131
Sticky...
224
00:12:36,049 --> 00:12:38,175
Bring a bowl of these
candies to my quarters
225
00:12:38,176 --> 00:12:39,552
when you're done crying.
226
00:12:42,597 --> 00:12:45,140
- Thanks for offering to
watch the kids, Leela.
227
00:12:45,141 --> 00:12:48,227
I need a break so
bad. You have no idea.
228
00:12:48,228 --> 00:12:51,313
- No, it's clear you're
a wreck, and I get it.
229
00:12:51,314 --> 00:12:53,357
They're a nightmare.
230
00:12:53,358 --> 00:12:55,901
A-A sweet, adorable nightmare.
231
00:12:55,902 --> 00:12:57,736
- That's fair. Kids!
232
00:12:57,737 --> 00:12:59,863
Mommy's gonna go nap-nap.
233
00:12:59,864 --> 00:13:02,032
Don't be scared of
Leela. She's very...
234
00:13:02,033 --> 00:13:03,784
Yay! Mommy Leela!
235
00:13:03,785 --> 00:13:06,120
Cowabunga, dude!
236
00:13:10,375 --> 00:13:13,168
- The Clump-O-Honeys you
requested, Capt... Oh jeez.
237
00:13:15,088 --> 00:13:17,923
If there's nothing further, I will...
- Oh no, you willn't.
238
00:13:17,924 --> 00:13:21,176
These delicious Clumps
aren't for eating. Mm!
239
00:13:21,177 --> 00:13:22,887
Mm...
240
00:13:22,888 --> 00:13:24,972
They're for manscaping.
241
00:13:24,973 --> 00:13:27,558
Manscape me, Kif.
That's an order.
242
00:13:27,559 --> 00:13:29,811
Owooga!
243
00:13:30,604 --> 00:13:32,855
- Ooh!
- Whoa! What's that?
244
00:13:32,856 --> 00:13:34,732
- I never saw one
of those before,
245
00:13:34,733 --> 00:13:36,650
and I was born,
like, four days ago.
246
00:13:36,651 --> 00:13:39,695
- It's a ship loader.
Any hyperactive kids here
247
00:13:39,696 --> 00:13:43,073
up for a nice, exhausting
treadmill race?
248
00:13:43,074 --> 00:13:46,493
Oh wow! Cool! I mean, cool.
249
00:13:46,494 --> 00:13:48,495
- God, I hope this works.
250
00:14:10,185 --> 00:14:13,896
- Approaching the outpost, sir.
Still no response on any frequency.
251
00:14:13,897 --> 00:14:16,857
- My God. What the hell
happened down there?
252
00:14:16,858 --> 00:14:19,610
It looks like the whole
planet has psoriasis.
253
00:14:19,611 --> 00:14:22,154
- You're looking at the
back of my head, sir.
254
00:14:33,458 --> 00:14:36,461
- Welcome to
Exobiology Station 38.
255
00:14:38,046 --> 00:14:40,256
- Dammit! I'm outta laser!
256
00:14:40,257 --> 00:14:43,342
- Um, hello, sir. Is
this outpost secure?
257
00:14:43,343 --> 00:14:46,262
The DOOP hasn't received any
response from you in months.
258
00:14:46,263 --> 00:14:48,764
- Oh, yeah. Transmitter
got ripped up by bears.
259
00:14:50,058 --> 00:14:52,518
That's what we study here.
Bears. I'm a bear biologist.
260
00:14:52,519 --> 00:14:54,979
- Sounds like a fun
job that pays bad.
261
00:14:54,980 --> 00:14:58,440
- I used to be a whale
biologist, but I hate whales.
262
00:14:58,441 --> 00:14:59,858
Hate them.
263
00:14:59,859 --> 00:15:02,403
- Well, then it's good you
found an animal you like.
264
00:15:02,404 --> 00:15:03,612
- Nope. Still looking.
265
00:15:03,613 --> 00:15:07,032
This bear
species is known as tardigrades.
266
00:15:07,033 --> 00:15:09,535
It's a fancy word for ugly.
267
00:15:09,536 --> 00:15:12,288
Oh, shut
up, you stupid bear!
268
00:15:12,289 --> 00:15:13,831
They're also stupid, by the way.
269
00:15:13,832 --> 00:15:16,001
I discovered that.
Bear biologist.
270
00:15:23,258 --> 00:15:25,969
I fixed the transmitter.
271
00:15:27,178 --> 00:15:29,555
Now, may I please head
home to my family?
272
00:15:29,556 --> 00:15:31,891
- Without delay. But first,
273
00:15:31,892 --> 00:15:33,350
candy break?
274
00:15:38,940 --> 00:15:40,774
- Are you bat crackers?
275
00:15:40,775 --> 00:15:43,320
If they smell human food,
they go bat crackers!
276
00:15:48,783 --> 00:15:52,494
- It seems they recognize
a fellow apex predator.
277
00:15:52,495 --> 00:15:54,873
Well, four can
play at that game.
278
00:15:59,711 --> 00:16:02,339
Kif! Help!
279
00:16:05,926 --> 00:16:08,636
Let's
go! Faster! Faster!
280
00:16:08,637 --> 00:16:11,472
Go, horseface, go!
281
00:16:11,473 --> 00:16:13,600
Neigh!
282
00:16:14,434 --> 00:16:17,228
Now, buy us ice cream!
283
00:16:21,566 --> 00:16:24,401
Rum raisin tastes just
like caterpillars!
284
00:16:24,402 --> 00:16:26,654
- We love you, Leela.
285
00:16:26,655 --> 00:16:29,823
- Aw, hell no! You're
not the mom of them!
286
00:16:29,824 --> 00:16:32,952
- What?
- Are you done spoiling my kids rotten
287
00:16:32,953 --> 00:16:34,703
so they'll love you more?
288
00:16:34,704 --> 00:16:36,872
- I'm just a beaten-down horse.
289
00:16:36,873 --> 00:16:39,792
- Well, you can trot
back to the barn now!
290
00:16:39,793 --> 00:16:43,045
Kif's coming home soon,
and you are not their mom!
291
00:16:43,046 --> 00:16:45,714
- Uh, actually, I sort of am.
292
00:16:45,715 --> 00:16:47,717
- Go on! Git! Hyah!
293
00:16:52,639 --> 00:16:55,140
Oh God, they're nuzzling me!
294
00:16:56,935 --> 00:16:58,852
Hello?
295
00:16:58,853 --> 00:17:01,480
- Please come home, Kiffy!
296
00:17:01,481 --> 00:17:04,900
The kids like Leela more
than me, and it really hurts.
297
00:17:06,278 --> 00:17:09,029
I'm the worst mom ever.
298
00:17:09,030 --> 00:17:11,365
Except for my own mom.
299
00:17:11,366 --> 00:17:14,577
Stop licking my
velour! It's dry clean only!
300
00:17:14,578 --> 00:17:17,121
- Amy, darling, the
children love you.
301
00:17:17,122 --> 00:17:18,706
And I love you.
302
00:17:18,707 --> 00:17:21,292
And stay away
from my scrotums!
303
00:17:21,293 --> 00:17:24,420
- You're their mother,
and you always will be.
304
00:17:24,421 --> 00:17:26,171
Nothing can change that.
305
00:17:27,257 --> 00:17:29,925
- Amy Wong, a challenge
has been filed
306
00:17:29,926 --> 00:17:32,303
for the motherhood
of these children.
307
00:17:32,304 --> 00:17:35,055
No...
308
00:17:35,056 --> 00:17:37,096
Amy? Amy,
I'm coming home, I swear.
309
00:17:39,019 --> 00:17:41,270
I have to leave right now, sir!
310
00:17:41,271 --> 00:17:44,607
No, Kif! The DOOP
never leaves a man behind!
311
00:17:44,608 --> 00:17:46,025
Not when I'm the man!
312
00:17:52,157 --> 00:17:55,618
- Alright, bears. Daddy's
coming to tuck you in...
313
00:17:56,661 --> 00:17:58,329
to your graves.
314
00:18:01,541 --> 00:18:02,959
- I'll be out here.
315
00:18:06,755 --> 00:18:08,756
- Nobody's taking my babies!
316
00:18:08,757 --> 00:18:10,424
They're everything to me!
317
00:18:10,425 --> 00:18:13,427
- I appreciate your emotional
shouting in my ear hole,
318
00:18:13,428 --> 00:18:16,806
but I must intervene whenever
parenthood is called into question.
319
00:18:18,141 --> 00:18:19,433
- Grand Midwife?
320
00:18:19,434 --> 00:18:21,936
- Oh, drop the
surprised act, Leela.
321
00:18:21,937 --> 00:18:24,313
How could you do this?
- Do what?
322
00:18:24,314 --> 00:18:27,149
Suck the jelly out of the
jelly donuts with a straw?
323
00:18:27,150 --> 00:18:30,402
- This jelly hound did not summon
me. The challenge is automatic
324
00:18:30,403 --> 00:18:33,948
when tests show the
smizmar contributed no DNA.
325
00:18:33,949 --> 00:18:35,991
The children
inherited genes
326
00:18:35,992 --> 00:18:37,826
only from Kif and Leela,
327
00:18:37,827 --> 00:18:40,704
plus trace DNA from
a certain Scruffy.
328
00:18:40,705 --> 00:18:43,707
Scruffy's stuff gets around.
329
00:18:45,293 --> 00:18:48,170
- Should the challenge indicate
someone else is the mother,
330
00:18:48,171 --> 00:18:49,421
then that person...
331
00:18:49,422 --> 00:18:51,590
eh, or whatever...
332
00:18:51,591 --> 00:18:53,092
shall raise the children.
333
00:18:53,093 --> 00:18:54,426
- But... But...
334
00:18:54,427 --> 00:18:58,430
- You and Kif must be present for
the challenge tomorrow. Good day.
335
00:18:59,891 --> 00:19:02,394
Yeah, FYI, y-you've got a
little jelly right there.
336
00:19:09,901 --> 00:19:12,111
- Did somebody call
an exterminator?
337
00:19:20,370 --> 00:19:23,038
- It's been a blast.
- Help me, Kif!
338
00:19:23,039 --> 00:19:26,000
They found the secret
candy in my girdle!
339
00:19:33,758 --> 00:19:36,261
I'm a camouflaged
killing machine.
340
00:19:40,140 --> 00:19:41,348
- I'm...
341
00:19:41,349 --> 00:19:44,310
I'm sorry I got
so jealous, Leela.
342
00:19:44,311 --> 00:19:47,354
I just kinda lost it.
- It's okay.
343
00:19:47,355 --> 00:19:50,649
The bond parents feel with
their kids is intense...
344
00:19:50,650 --> 00:19:51,942
so I hear.
345
00:19:51,943 --> 00:19:54,653
I'm just
proud I helped you become a mom.
346
00:19:58,074 --> 00:20:00,200
I hope it works out
for you tomorrow.
347
00:20:00,201 --> 00:20:01,869
- And if it doesn't,
348
00:20:01,870 --> 00:20:05,372
I'm sure you'll
take good care of them.
349
00:20:09,836 --> 00:20:12,671
- I refuse to die groveling.
350
00:20:12,672 --> 00:20:14,340
But I'm open to sniveling.
351
00:20:24,684 --> 00:20:26,101
Naked Kif,
352
00:20:26,102 --> 00:20:27,519
you saved my life!
353
00:20:27,520 --> 00:20:29,480
You have my undying loyalty.
354
00:20:30,732 --> 00:20:32,107
Eat Kif! He's boneless!
355
00:20:37,364 --> 00:20:39,531
- This one's for Axl, Mandy,
356
00:20:39,532 --> 00:20:41,158
and little what's-his-name.
357
00:21:03,932 --> 00:21:07,560
- I am the Grand Midwife
from the other day,
358
00:21:07,561 --> 00:21:10,980
inquisitor for the
challenge of Amy Wong.
359
00:21:10,981 --> 00:21:13,399
Amy, where is your smizmale?
360
00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:15,025
- He isn't with me.
361
00:21:15,026 --> 00:21:18,904
- Oh, the sorrow! Oh, the shame!
362
00:21:18,905 --> 00:21:20,364
- There he is!
363
00:21:22,325 --> 00:21:24,619
- Okay, but it doesn't
lessen the shame.
364
00:21:25,829 --> 00:21:27,705
- Kif!
- Amy!
365
00:21:27,706 --> 00:21:29,207
Daddy!
366
00:21:30,417 --> 00:21:32,293
- I don't remember him.
367
00:21:32,294 --> 00:21:34,420
- So, like, did
you do war stuff?
368
00:21:34,421 --> 00:21:37,256
- I did what a Daddy had to do.
369
00:21:43,263 --> 00:21:45,973
- Bear number 23
was also stupid,
370
00:21:45,974 --> 00:21:49,268
fighting for scraps while
I dined on salmon tartare.
371
00:21:51,605 --> 00:21:53,607
None for you, losers!
372
00:21:57,193 --> 00:21:58,569
Oh!
373
00:22:05,327 --> 00:22:08,537
- The challenge may play
out over days or weeks
374
00:22:08,538 --> 00:22:11,916
within the brutal confines
of the Inquisidome.
375
00:22:11,917 --> 00:22:13,668
Some call it a tiki hut.
376
00:22:14,002 --> 00:22:16,962
- Leela's gonna watch you
guys while we're in there.
377
00:22:18,089 --> 00:22:20,133
And maybe a little longer.
378
00:22:20,508 --> 00:22:22,426
But whatever happens,
379
00:22:22,427 --> 00:22:24,429
you're going to be okay.
380
00:22:25,847 --> 00:22:27,598
- You are, too.
381
00:22:38,526 --> 00:22:41,111
- The challenge is a
challenging challenge,
382
00:22:41,112 --> 00:22:44,114
dating from when our
language had few words.
383
00:22:44,115 --> 00:22:46,909
It will incorporate a
battery of genetic tests
384
00:22:46,910 --> 00:22:49,912
and a full neuropsychological
obstacle course,
385
00:22:49,913 --> 00:22:52,915
but it begins with
a simple question.
386
00:22:52,916 --> 00:22:54,083
Amy Wong.
387
00:22:54,084 --> 00:22:57,753
Do you or do you not
love those children?
388
00:23:01,633 --> 00:23:04,678
- More than I knew I
could love anything.
389
00:23:05,887 --> 00:23:07,889
- Which is all
that truly matters.
390
00:23:08,932 --> 00:23:10,766
The challenge is over.
391
00:23:10,767 --> 00:23:12,351
You are their mother
392
00:23:12,352 --> 00:23:14,979
and always will be.
393
00:23:20,652 --> 00:23:22,611
Oops! That wasn't
supposed to happen.
394
00:23:22,612 --> 00:23:24,446
Cheap, lousy wall.
395
00:23:24,447 --> 00:23:28,075
Children! You may now come
hug your mother and father.
396
00:23:28,076 --> 00:23:30,244
For only a small additional fee.
397
00:23:33,832 --> 00:23:36,542
- You're my favorite mommy.
398
00:23:40,922 --> 00:23:42,631
- Who wants treacle?
399
00:23:45,719 --> 00:23:47,428
- Strong stuff, huh?
400
00:00:45,547 --> 00:00:47,673
- Aw. He's using his jacket
401
00:00:47,674 --> 00:00:49,717
as some kind of
security blanket.
402
00:00:49,718 --> 00:00:51,552
- That's so cute and pathetic.
403
00:00:51,553 --> 00:00:54,847
- It really is.
You do you, weirdo!
404
00:00:54,848 --> 00:00:57,391
- Oh, hey, guys. I'm just
sucking on my jacket.
405
00:00:57,392 --> 00:00:59,768
A Clump-O-Honey candy
got stuck right there
406
00:00:59,769 --> 00:01:02,521
over a thousand years ago,
and I can still taste it.
407
00:01:02,522 --> 00:01:04,940
- You know who I bet
would like some of that?
408
00:01:04,941 --> 00:01:06,275
Me! Zoidberg.
409
00:01:08,153 --> 00:01:10,362
Oh, no!
410
00:01:10,363 --> 00:01:12,448
Zoidberg, you residue hog!
411
00:01:12,449 --> 00:01:14,658
Now all I taste is crab juice.
412
00:01:14,659 --> 00:01:16,869
- So, buy another jacket candy.
413
00:01:16,870 --> 00:01:18,913
- I can't. They
stopped making it
414
00:01:18,914 --> 00:01:22,041
after it got reclassified
as industrial glue.
415
00:01:22,042 --> 00:01:25,419
- Ah. Then I, Bender,
will recreate the recipe.
416
00:01:25,420 --> 00:01:28,423
Don't forget, I came in
third on MasterChef Junior.
417
00:01:32,510 --> 00:01:34,511
- May I have a taste?
418
00:01:34,512 --> 00:01:37,306
- Sure. You seem like the
kind of guy who has a mouth.
419
00:01:38,642 --> 00:01:41,810
- Whoa! Diabetic coma!
420
00:01:41,811 --> 00:01:44,731
- Hm. I better add some
sugar to make it less sweet.
421
00:01:46,524 --> 00:01:49,068
- And just a touch of treacle
422
00:01:49,069 --> 00:01:52,196
to remind me of my dear
departed Aunt Juanita.
423
00:01:52,197 --> 00:01:54,740
She
drowned in treacle.
424
00:01:54,741 --> 00:01:57,743
- You know I'm
dying on the floor.
425
00:02:03,250 --> 00:02:05,626
So, what do you think?
426
00:02:05,627 --> 00:02:08,963
- Mm! It's perfect, Bender.
Totally jacket worthy.
427
00:02:08,964 --> 00:02:11,131
It's a little sticky.
428
00:02:11,132 --> 00:02:12,925
It's
a lot sticky!
429
00:02:14,594 --> 00:02:17,471
And there's
something hard in it.
430
00:02:20,100 --> 00:02:23,686
- Luckily, I'm an expert
at fixing human beak bones.
431
00:02:23,687 --> 00:02:26,438
Are you free Friday for
an expensive appointment?
432
00:02:26,439 --> 00:02:28,942
- Let me check. Open calendar!
433
00:02:30,569 --> 00:02:32,736
Shmeird. There's
some old alert
434
00:02:32,737 --> 00:02:34,989
I set up 20 years ago.
435
00:02:34,990 --> 00:02:37,158
Our babies?!
436
00:02:38,785 --> 00:02:40,244
- It's time, my love.
437
00:02:40,245 --> 00:02:42,037
- Oh, Kif!
438
00:02:42,038 --> 00:02:43,706
- The hell are
you talking about?
439
00:02:43,707 --> 00:02:46,041
Something to do with
the meatbag life cycle?
440
00:02:46,042 --> 00:02:48,127
- That's right,
Bender. Many years ago,
441
00:02:48,128 --> 00:02:50,546
I gave birth to a
clutch of tadpoles
442
00:02:50,547 --> 00:02:52,339
with Amy by my side.
443
00:02:52,340 --> 00:02:54,800
- I have video of the
birth. Wanna see it?
444
00:02:54,801 --> 00:02:55,968
No!
445
00:02:55,969 --> 00:02:58,388
- That is the wrong
kind of delivery!
446
00:03:00,390 --> 00:03:03,142
Oh, Nelly! Oh!
447
00:03:07,647 --> 00:03:09,523
- Life is disgusting.
448
00:03:09,524 --> 00:03:11,525
- No, it was beautiful.
449
00:03:11,526 --> 00:03:14,028
But I was so not
prepared to be a mother.
450
00:03:14,029 --> 00:03:16,030
- In 20 years,
they'll sprout legs
451
00:03:16,031 --> 00:03:18,909
and crawl back onto
land as children.
452
00:03:19,618 --> 00:03:21,578
- I'll be ready then.
453
00:03:22,746 --> 00:03:25,247
- Well, Amy, are you ready now?
454
00:03:25,248 --> 00:03:27,124
- Having a family with you
455
00:03:27,125 --> 00:03:30,502
is the only thing I
want in the whole world.
456
00:03:30,503 --> 00:03:32,838
- Then can I have your car?
- No!
457
00:03:32,839 --> 00:03:34,590
- Too late. I
already crashed it.
458
00:03:41,765 --> 00:03:43,140
- Oh, this is so exciting!
459
00:03:43,141 --> 00:03:45,601
The birth ceremony
will begin any minute.
460
00:03:45,602 --> 00:03:47,562
- Thanks for the warning.
461
00:03:48,521 --> 00:03:50,689
And don't describe it
to me!
462
00:03:50,690 --> 00:03:53,108
- We're here!
- Mom! Dad!
463
00:03:53,109 --> 00:03:55,319
Oh, I'm so glad you made it!
464
00:03:55,320 --> 00:03:58,155
- Oh, we wouldn't miss the
birth of our grandbabies
465
00:03:58,156 --> 00:03:59,782
for a million dollars.
466
00:03:59,783 --> 00:04:01,951
- 'Cause we're so rich,
that's like a penny.
467
00:04:04,955 --> 00:04:07,581
- Oh, my. It's
the Grand Midwife.
468
00:04:07,582 --> 00:04:10,125
- I am the Grand Midwife!
469
00:04:10,126 --> 00:04:11,794
- Big fan!
470
00:04:11,795 --> 00:04:14,088
- I am Kif of the clan Kroker.
471
00:04:14,089 --> 00:04:16,423
- I know. I recognize your head.
472
00:04:16,424 --> 00:04:18,509
- And this is my smizmar, Amy.
473
00:04:18,510 --> 00:04:20,970
We have come to
receive our offspring.
474
00:04:20,971 --> 00:04:23,264
- As you transition
to parenthood,
475
00:04:23,265 --> 00:04:25,891
I shall be your
counsel and guide.
476
00:04:25,892 --> 00:04:29,228
I do so out of solemn
respect for our traditions
477
00:04:29,229 --> 00:04:31,772
and not for any
optional cash donation
478
00:04:31,773 --> 00:04:33,857
people sometimes
place in that basket.
479
00:04:33,858 --> 00:04:35,234
- Thank you.
- It's green,
480
00:04:35,235 --> 00:04:37,487
and there's a little sign on it.
- Found it!
481
00:04:39,656 --> 00:04:42,908
- Then the Emergence
shall now commence!
482
00:04:47,122 --> 00:04:49,707
Or not. It's unpredictable.
483
00:04:49,708 --> 00:04:52,751
Guess I'll have to wing it.
Anybody here from out of town?
484
00:04:52,752 --> 00:04:54,712
O-oh!
Here they come.
485
00:05:02,470 --> 00:05:06,223
- Oh my. I'm so anxious, my
camouflage reflex is kicking in.
486
00:05:06,224 --> 00:05:07,725
- No, it's helpful.
487
00:05:07,726 --> 00:05:10,227
I wanna look cute for
our hundreds of kids.
488
00:05:11,813 --> 00:05:15,190
- We shall now stand
by, without interfering,
489
00:05:15,191 --> 00:05:18,319
as we observe the sacred
process known as...
490
00:05:18,320 --> 00:05:19,737
the Winnowing.
491
00:05:19,738 --> 00:05:21,155
- What's that mean?
492
00:05:21,156 --> 00:05:23,240
- It means don't
start naming them yet.
493
00:05:40,217 --> 00:05:41,717
- Four of them made it!
494
00:05:43,136 --> 00:05:44,762
Well, three and a half.
495
00:05:44,763 --> 00:05:47,306
- Young creatures
of the Black Lagoon,
496
00:05:47,307 --> 00:05:49,308
go now to your parents.
497
00:05:52,854 --> 00:05:54,688
- Uh, can I help you?
498
00:05:54,689 --> 00:05:55,941
- Over here!
499
00:05:59,277 --> 00:06:02,279
They're perfect.
500
00:06:02,280 --> 00:06:04,406
- Ew. She's touching them.
501
00:06:04,407 --> 00:06:07,409
- Cherish these
children, Kif and Amy,
502
00:06:07,410 --> 00:06:09,579
for they are beautiful.
503
00:06:11,623 --> 00:06:12,623
Eh...
504
00:06:12,624 --> 00:06:15,584
- Well, in-in the sense that
all children are beautiful.
505
00:06:24,970 --> 00:06:27,346
The transformation is complete!
506
00:06:27,347 --> 00:06:30,891
We welcome these new
beings of the land.
507
00:06:32,602 --> 00:06:35,104
- They can call
me Captain Uncle.
508
00:06:35,105 --> 00:06:38,524
- Uh, I'll go dispose
of this medical waste.
509
00:06:38,525 --> 00:06:40,819
With a little butter and lemon.
510
00:06:41,444 --> 00:06:43,654
- Want a picture with the kids?
- No need.
511
00:06:43,655 --> 00:06:45,823
The way they look is
burned into my mind.
512
00:06:45,824 --> 00:06:48,534
- They're nice, you know?
Just a kinda little...
513
00:06:48,535 --> 00:06:49,827
- Super gross.
514
00:06:49,828 --> 00:06:52,413
- But, you're
finally grandparents.
515
00:06:52,414 --> 00:06:54,207
- That'll be our little secret.
516
00:07:05,051 --> 00:07:06,928
Oh my.
517
00:07:09,055 --> 00:07:11,807
- Thanks for bringing the
kids by for my lunch break.
518
00:07:11,808 --> 00:07:14,101
- They're the sweetest
thing on the menu.
519
00:07:14,102 --> 00:07:15,022
Not even close!
520
00:07:16,479 --> 00:07:17,980
- Uh, question.
521
00:07:17,981 --> 00:07:20,984
These three babies are
totally different sizes.
522
00:07:21,818 --> 00:07:22,902
Question mark.
523
00:07:22,903 --> 00:07:25,237
- Oh, well, they
grew at varying rates
524
00:07:25,238 --> 00:07:27,823
depending on the temperature
of the water they were in.
525
00:07:27,824 --> 00:07:31,118
Little Newt here was
in a cold, deep area.
526
00:07:31,119 --> 00:07:33,370
- Mama!
- Wrong again.
527
00:07:34,497 --> 00:07:37,207
- Mandy is from the
temperate middle depths.
528
00:07:37,208 --> 00:07:38,792
- He's shrively!
529
00:07:38,793 --> 00:07:41,170
You haven't
seen the half of it.
530
00:07:41,171 --> 00:07:43,380
- And Axl is from
the warm shallows,
531
00:07:43,381 --> 00:07:45,216
just like his old man.
532
00:07:45,217 --> 00:07:48,093
Do you always
have to talk about me?
533
00:07:48,094 --> 00:07:50,554
- So why does this one
keep calling me Mama?
534
00:07:50,555 --> 00:07:52,306
And what's with
the big weird eye?
535
00:07:52,307 --> 00:07:54,600
- It's not weird.
It looks like yours.
536
00:07:54,601 --> 00:07:55,935
It's pretty weird.
537
00:07:55,936 --> 00:07:57,436
- Why would he look like me?
538
00:07:57,437 --> 00:07:58,896
- Don't you remember?
539
00:07:58,897 --> 00:08:01,607
Twenty years ago,
you impregnated Kif.
540
00:08:01,608 --> 00:08:03,943
- Seriously? Oh, my God.
541
00:08:03,944 --> 00:08:05,736
I must have been super drunk.
542
00:08:05,737 --> 00:08:09,114
- Leela, you bone brain!
You didn't have sex.
543
00:08:09,115 --> 00:08:11,116
Bone.
544
00:08:11,117 --> 00:08:13,535
- Luckily, there's
an educational movie
545
00:08:13,536 --> 00:08:17,081
that explains how Kif's
species reproduces.
546
00:08:17,082 --> 00:08:18,832
And it's filthy.
547
00:08:18,833 --> 00:08:22,002
YowzaVision
Educational Films
548
00:08:22,003 --> 00:08:25,506
presents Sex Across
The Universe.
549
00:08:25,507 --> 00:08:28,342
Oh, yeah!
Educate me, baby.
550
00:08:28,343 --> 00:08:30,595
This week,
the Amphibiosans.
551
00:08:31,346 --> 00:08:33,889
For every organism
across the universe,
552
00:08:33,890 --> 00:08:37,560
reproduction is a
steamy, erotic process.
553
00:08:37,561 --> 00:08:40,145
Except the Amphibiosans.
554
00:08:40,146 --> 00:08:42,356
They just barely touch hands
555
00:08:42,357 --> 00:08:45,067
while the rest of us
are gettin' it on.
556
00:08:45,068 --> 00:08:47,194
Yowza.
557
00:08:47,195 --> 00:08:48,612
Eh, that
was pretty hot.
558
00:08:48,613 --> 00:08:51,240
- So, you see, Amy
was my smizmar,
559
00:08:51,241 --> 00:08:54,827
the one whose mere presence
made me receptive to pregnancy.
560
00:08:54,828 --> 00:08:57,913
- Which makes me their smizmama.
561
00:08:57,914 --> 00:09:01,208
- But it was Lila who
contributed the DNA
562
00:09:01,209 --> 00:09:04,253
when she accidentally
touched Kif's hand.
563
00:09:04,254 --> 00:09:06,130
- Are you sure I wasn't drunk?
564
00:09:06,131 --> 00:09:08,716
I-I mean, I'm drunk
now.
565
00:09:08,717 --> 00:09:10,217
- Mwah!
566
00:09:10,218 --> 00:09:11,886
- Ew! Mom, Dad!
567
00:09:11,887 --> 00:09:13,721
Leela!
568
00:09:13,722 --> 00:09:17,559
♪ Will you stay in
our lovers' story? ♪
569
00:09:18,226 --> 00:09:21,186
♪ If you stay, you
won't be sorry ♪
570
00:09:21,187 --> 00:09:23,564
♪ 'Cause we believe in you ♪
571
00:09:25,150 --> 00:09:28,861
♪ Soon you'll grow,
so take a chance ♪
572
00:09:28,862 --> 00:09:33,575
♪ With a couple of kooks
hung up on romancing ♪
573
00:09:34,326 --> 00:09:38,162
♪ Will you stay in
our lovers' story? ♪
574
00:09:38,163 --> 00:09:41,749
♪ If you stay, you
won't be sorry ♪
575
00:09:41,750 --> 00:09:43,667
♪ 'Cause we believe in you ♪
576
00:09:45,295 --> 00:09:48,714
♪ Soon, you'll grow,
so take a chance ♪
577
00:09:48,715 --> 00:09:50,841
♪ With a couple of kooks ♪
578
00:09:50,842 --> 00:09:53,761
♪ Hung up on romancing ♪
579
00:09:57,515 --> 00:10:00,226
- Let's reinflate
my head and go home.
580
00:10:00,227 --> 00:10:04,188
- Yeah. Maybe they'll conk out
and we'll get a little us time.
581
00:10:09,986 --> 00:10:13,073
Those little guys are
the best, but they're a lot.
582
00:10:14,074 --> 00:10:16,576
- Well, luckily, there's
two of us to split the work.
583
00:10:17,827 --> 00:10:19,870
♪ Doop, doo-doo-doop,
doop, doop, doop, doop! ♪
584
00:10:19,871 --> 00:10:22,039
- Captain Brannigan!
At your service, sir.
585
00:10:22,040 --> 00:10:25,417
- With ease, Lieutenant. I have
a bit of news to say at you.
586
00:10:25,418 --> 00:10:28,379
- Is it about the baby gifts you claim
you sent? Because we still haven't...
587
00:10:28,380 --> 00:10:30,130
- I'm afraid there's
no time to discuss
588
00:10:30,131 --> 00:10:32,925
the many presents I bought,
some of which are large.
589
00:10:32,926 --> 00:10:35,261
Soldier, you are ordered
to report for duty.
590
00:10:36,263 --> 00:10:39,640
- Is it war?
- I hope so, but we're not sure.
591
00:10:39,641 --> 00:10:42,434
All we know is that DOOP
has lost radio contact
592
00:10:42,435 --> 00:10:46,063
with a remote outpost in
Ursa Major. Over and under.
593
00:10:48,400 --> 00:10:50,734
- I'm sorry you'll have
to handle the kids alone.
594
00:10:50,735 --> 00:10:52,236
I'm not worried.
595
00:10:58,785 --> 00:11:00,452
I love you!
596
00:11:24,269 --> 00:11:26,145
- Roll call!
597
00:11:26,146 --> 00:11:29,607
"Four eyes."
"One-eye." "Crab man."
598
00:11:29,608 --> 00:11:32,026
"Can man." "Who cares?"
599
00:11:32,027 --> 00:11:33,777
Dammit! Where's Amy?
600
00:11:33,778 --> 00:11:35,779
What do I need, a bigger antler?
601
00:11:35,780 --> 00:11:38,490
Oh, I'm so, so sorry.
602
00:11:38,491 --> 00:11:40,159
The babysitter didn't show up.
603
00:11:40,160 --> 00:11:42,077
Ah!
604
00:11:42,078 --> 00:11:45,247
- Finally. Where are you?
- Sorry, toots.
605
00:11:45,248 --> 00:11:46,916
I must have the address wrong.
606
00:11:46,917 --> 00:11:49,335
784 West 28th Street?
607
00:11:49,336 --> 00:11:52,087
Uh-huh. Weird,
th-that's what I got.
608
00:11:52,088 --> 00:11:53,881
Oh, Earth! Ah!
609
00:11:53,882 --> 00:11:56,550
Coulda swore you
said Kepler 10B.
610
00:11:58,053 --> 00:12:01,680
Guess I'll catch the next
generation ship back to Nutley.
611
00:12:01,681 --> 00:12:03,515
- Oh...
612
00:12:03,516 --> 00:12:06,644
- Mom, Mom, Mom! Can you
judge our whispering contest?
613
00:12:06,645 --> 00:12:08,145
Okay. You ready?
614
00:12:08,146 --> 00:12:11,190
I lose!
615
00:12:11,191 --> 00:12:12,524
Oh, come on! Oh...
616
00:12:17,822 --> 00:12:21,242
- Look at me, chugging
mineral water on a weeknight!
617
00:12:21,243 --> 00:12:23,285
So wild and free!
618
00:12:25,372 --> 00:12:27,414
I miss them so.
619
00:12:27,415 --> 00:12:29,333
- I feel you, soldier.
620
00:12:29,334 --> 00:12:32,294
And not in a handsy
way this time.
621
00:12:32,295 --> 00:12:33,754
Mm.
622
00:12:33,755 --> 00:12:35,131
Sticky...
623
00:12:36,049 --> 00:12:38,175
Bring a bowl of these
candies to my quarters
624
00:12:38,176 --> 00:12:39,552
when you're done crying.
625
00:12:42,597 --> 00:12:45,140
- Thanks for offering to
watch the kids, Leela.
626
00:12:45,141 --> 00:12:48,227
I need a break so
bad. You have no idea.
627
00:12:48,228 --> 00:12:51,313
- No, it's clear you're
a wreck, and I get it.
628
00:12:51,314 --> 00:12:53,357
They're a nightmare.
629
00:12:53,358 --> 00:12:55,901
A-A sweet, adorable nightmare.
630
00:12:55,902 --> 00:12:57,736
- That's fair. Kids!
631
00:12:57,737 --> 00:12:59,863
Mommy's gonna go nap-nap.
632
00:12:59,864 --> 00:13:02,032
Don't be scared of
Leela. She's very...
633
00:13:02,033 --> 00:13:03,784
Yay! Mommy Leela!
634
00:13:03,785 --> 00:13:06,120
Cowabunga, dude!
635
00:13:10,375 --> 00:13:13,168
- The Clump-O-Honeys you
requested, Capt... Oh jeez.
636
00:13:15,088 --> 00:13:17,923
If there's nothing further, I will...
- Oh no, you willn't.
637
00:13:17,924 --> 00:13:21,176
These delicious Clumps
aren't for eating. Mm!
638
00:13:21,177 --> 00:13:22,887
Mm...
639
00:13:22,888 --> 00:13:24,972
They're for manscaping.
640
00:13:24,973 --> 00:13:27,558
Manscape me, Kif.
That's an order.
641
00:13:27,559 --> 00:13:29,811
Owooga!
642
00:13:30,604 --> 00:13:32,855
- Ooh!
- Whoa! What's that?
643
00:13:32,856 --> 00:13:34,732
- I never saw one
of those before,
644
00:13:34,733 --> 00:13:36,650
and I was born,
like, four days ago.
645
00:13:36,651 --> 00:13:39,695
- It's a ship loader.
Any hyperactive kids here
646
00:13:39,696 --> 00:13:43,073
up for a nice, exhausting
treadmill race?
647
00:13:43,074 --> 00:13:46,493
Oh wow! Cool! I mean, cool.
648
00:13:46,494 --> 00:13:48,495
- God, I hope this works.
649
00:14:10,185 --> 00:14:13,896
- Approaching the outpost, sir.
Still no response on any frequency.
650
00:14:13,897 --> 00:14:16,857
- My God. What the hell
happened down there?
651
00:14:16,858 --> 00:14:19,610
It looks like the whole
planet has psoriasis.
652
00:14:19,611 --> 00:14:22,154
- You're looking at the
back of my head, sir.
653
00:14:33,458 --> 00:14:36,461
- Welcome to
Exobiology Station 38.
654
00:14:38,046 --> 00:14:40,256
- Dammit! I'm outta laser!
655
00:14:40,257 --> 00:14:43,342
- Um, hello, sir. Is
this outpost secure?
656
00:14:43,343 --> 00:14:46,262
The DOOP hasn't received any
response from you in months.
657
00:14:46,263 --> 00:14:48,764
- Oh, yeah. Transmitter
got ripped up by bears.
658
00:14:50,058 --> 00:14:52,518
That's what we study here.
Bears. I'm a bear biologist.
659
00:14:52,519 --> 00:14:54,979
- Sounds like a fun
job that pays bad.
660
00:14:54,980 --> 00:14:58,440
- I used to be a whale
biologist, but I hate whales.
661
00:14:58,441 --> 00:14:59,858
Hate them.
662
00:14:59,859 --> 00:15:02,403
- Well, then it's good you
found an animal you like.
663
00:15:02,404 --> 00:15:03,612
- Nope. Still looking.
664
00:15:03,613 --> 00:15:07,032
This bear
species is known as tardigrades.
665
00:15:07,033 --> 00:15:09,535
It's a fancy word for ugly.
666
00:15:09,536 --> 00:15:12,288
Oh, shut
up, you stupid bear!
667
00:15:12,289 --> 00:15:13,831
They're also stupid, by the way.
668
00:15:13,832 --> 00:15:16,001
I discovered that.
Bear biologist.
669
00:15:23,258 --> 00:15:25,969
I fixed the transmitter.
670
00:15:27,178 --> 00:15:29,555
Now, may I please head
home to my family?
671
00:15:29,556 --> 00:15:31,891
- Without delay. But first,
672
00:15:31,892 --> 00:15:33,350
candy break?
673
00:15:38,940 --> 00:15:40,774
- Are you bat crackers?
674
00:15:40,775 --> 00:15:43,320
If they smell human food,
they go bat crackers!
675
00:15:48,783 --> 00:15:52,494
- It seems they recognize
a fellow apex predator.
676
00:15:52,495 --> 00:15:54,873
Well, four can
play at that game.
677
00:15:59,711 --> 00:16:02,339
Kif! Help!
678
00:16:05,926 --> 00:16:08,636
Let's
go! Faster! Faster!
679
00:16:08,637 --> 00:16:11,472
Go, horseface, go!
680
00:16:11,473 --> 00:16:13,600
Neigh!
681
00:16:14,434 --> 00:16:17,228
Now, buy us ice cream!
682
00:16:21,566 --> 00:16:24,401
Rum raisin tastes just
like caterpillars!
683
00:16:24,402 --> 00:16:26,654
- We love you, Leela.
684
00:16:26,655 --> 00:16:29,823
- Aw, hell no! You're
not the mom of them!
685
00:16:29,824 --> 00:16:32,952
- What?
- Are you done spoiling my kids rotten
686
00:16:32,953 --> 00:16:34,703
so they'll love you more?
687
00:16:34,704 --> 00:16:36,872
- I'm just a beaten-down horse.
688
00:16:36,873 --> 00:16:39,792
- Well, you can trot
back to the barn now!
689
00:16:39,793 --> 00:16:43,045
Kif's coming home soon,
and you are not their mom!
690
00:16:43,046 --> 00:16:45,714
- Uh, actually, I sort of am.
691
00:16:45,715 --> 00:16:47,717
- Go on! Git! Hyah!
692
00:16:52,639 --> 00:16:55,140
Oh God, they're nuzzling me!
693
00:16:56,935 --> 00:16:58,852
Hello?
694
00:16:58,853 --> 00:17:01,480
- Please come home, Kiffy!
695
00:17:01,481 --> 00:17:04,900
The kids like Leela more
than me, and it really hurts.
696
00:17:06,278 --> 00:17:09,029
I'm the worst mom ever.
697
00:17:09,030 --> 00:17:11,365
Except for my own mom.
698
00:17:11,366 --> 00:17:14,577
Stop licking my
velour! It's dry clean only!
699
00:17:14,578 --> 00:17:17,121
- Amy, darling, the
children love you.
700
00:17:17,122 --> 00:17:18,706
And I love you.
701
00:17:18,707 --> 00:17:21,292
And stay away
from my scrotums!
702
00:17:21,293 --> 00:17:24,420
- You're their mother,
and you always will be.
703
00:17:24,421 --> 00:17:26,171
Nothing can change that.
704
00:17:27,257 --> 00:17:29,925
- Amy Wong, a challenge
has been filed
705
00:17:29,926 --> 00:17:32,303
for the motherhood
of these children.
706
00:17:32,304 --> 00:17:35,055
No...
707
00:17:35,056 --> 00:17:37,096
Amy? Amy,
I'm coming home, I swear.
708
00:17:39,019 --> 00:17:41,270
I have to leave right now, sir!
709
00:17:41,271 --> 00:17:44,607
No, Kif! The DOOP
never leaves a man behind!
710
00:17:44,608 --> 00:17:46,025
Not when I'm the man!
711
00:17:52,157 --> 00:17:55,618
- Alright, bears. Daddy's
coming to tuck you in...
712
00:17:56,661 --> 00:17:58,329
to your graves.
713
00:18:01,541 --> 00:18:02,959
- I'll be out here.
714
00:18:06,755 --> 00:18:08,756
- Nobody's taking my babies!
715
00:18:08,757 --> 00:18:10,424
They're everything to me!
716
00:18:10,425 --> 00:18:13,427
- I appreciate your emotional
shouting in my ear hole,
717
00:18:13,428 --> 00:18:16,806
but I must intervene whenever
parenthood is called into question.
718
00:18:18,141 --> 00:18:19,433
- Grand Midwife?
719
00:18:19,434 --> 00:18:21,936
- Oh, drop the
surprised act, Leela.
720
00:18:21,937 --> 00:18:24,313
How could you do this?
- Do what?
721
00:18:24,314 --> 00:18:27,149
Suck the jelly out of the
jelly donuts with a straw?
722
00:18:27,150 --> 00:18:30,402
- This jelly hound did not summon
me. The challenge is automatic
723
00:18:30,403 --> 00:18:33,948
when tests show the
smizmar contributed no DNA.
724
00:18:33,949 --> 00:18:35,991
The children
inherited genes
725
00:18:35,992 --> 00:18:37,826
only from Kif and Leela,
726
00:18:37,827 --> 00:18:40,704
plus trace DNA from
a certain Scruffy.
727
00:18:40,705 --> 00:18:43,707
Scruffy's stuff gets around.
728
00:18:45,293 --> 00:18:48,170
- Should the challenge indicate
someone else is the mother,
729
00:18:48,171 --> 00:18:49,421
then that person...
730
00:18:49,422 --> 00:18:51,590
eh, or whatever...
731
00:18:51,591 --> 00:18:53,092
shall raise the children.
732
00:18:53,093 --> 00:18:54,426
- But... But...
733
00:18:54,427 --> 00:18:58,430
- You and Kif must be present for
the challenge tomorrow. Good day.
734
00:18:59,891 --> 00:19:02,394
Yeah, FYI, y-you've got a
little jelly right there.
735
00:19:09,901 --> 00:19:12,111
- Did somebody call
an exterminator?
736
00:19:20,370 --> 00:19:23,038
- It's been a blast.
- Help me, Kif!
737
00:19:23,039 --> 00:19:26,000
They found the secret
candy in my girdle!
738
00:19:33,758 --> 00:19:36,261
I'm a camouflaged
killing machine.
739
00:19:40,140 --> 00:19:41,348
- I'm...
740
00:19:41,349 --> 00:19:44,310
I'm sorry I got
so jealous, Leela.
741
00:19:44,311 --> 00:19:47,354
I just kinda lost it.
- It's okay.
742
00:19:47,355 --> 00:19:50,649
The bond parents feel with
their kids is intense...
743
00:19:50,650 --> 00:19:51,942
so I hear.
744
00:19:51,943 --> 00:19:54,653
I'm just
proud I helped you become a mom.
745
00:19:58,074 --> 00:20:00,200
I hope it works out
for you tomorrow.
746
00:20:00,201 --> 00:20:01,869
- And if it doesn't,
747
00:20:01,870 --> 00:20:05,372
I'm sure you'll
take good care of them.
748
00:20:09,836 --> 00:20:12,671
- I refuse to die groveling.
749
00:20:12,672 --> 00:20:14,340
But I'm open to sniveling.
750
00:20:24,684 --> 00:20:26,101
Naked Kif,
751
00:20:26,102 --> 00:20:27,519
you saved my life!
752
00:20:27,520 --> 00:20:29,480
You have my undying loyalty.
753
00:20:30,732 --> 00:20:32,107
Eat Kif! He's boneless!
754
00:20:37,364 --> 00:20:39,531
- This one's for Axl, Mandy,
755
00:20:39,532 --> 00:20:41,158
and little what's-his-name.
756
00:21:03,932 --> 00:21:07,560
- I am the Grand Midwife
from the other day,
757
00:21:07,561 --> 00:21:10,980
inquisitor for the
challenge of Amy Wong.
758
00:21:10,981 --> 00:21:13,399
Amy, where is your smizmale?
759
00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:15,025
- He isn't with me.
760
00:21:15,026 --> 00:21:18,904
- Oh, the sorrow! Oh, the shame!
761
00:21:18,905 --> 00:21:20,364
- There he is!
762
00:21:22,325 --> 00:21:24,619
- Okay, but it doesn't
lessen the shame.
763
00:21:25,829 --> 00:21:27,705
- Kif!
- Amy!
764
00:21:27,706 --> 00:21:29,207
Daddy!
765
00:21:30,417 --> 00:21:32,293
- I don't remember him.
766
00:21:32,294 --> 00:21:34,420
- So, like, did
you do war stuff?
767
00:21:34,421 --> 00:21:37,256
- I did what a Daddy had to do.
768
00:21:43,263 --> 00:21:45,973
- Bear number 23
was also stupid,
769
00:21:45,974 --> 00:21:49,268
fighting for scraps while
I dined on salmon tartare.
770
00:21:51,605 --> 00:21:53,607
None for you, losers!
771
00:21:57,193 --> 00:21:58,569
Oh!
772
00:22:05,327 --> 00:22:08,537
- The challenge may play
out over days or weeks
773
00:22:08,538 --> 00:22:11,916
within the brutal confines
of the Inquisidome.
774
00:22:11,917 --> 00:22:13,668
Some call it a tiki hut.
775
00:22:14,002 --> 00:22:16,962
- Leela's gonna watch you
guys while we're in there.
776
00:22:18,089 --> 00:22:20,133
And maybe a little longer.
777
00:22:20,508 --> 00:22:22,426
But whatever happens,
778
00:22:22,427 --> 00:22:24,429
you're going to be okay.
779
00:22:25,847 --> 00:22:27,598
- You are, too.
780
00:22:38,526 --> 00:22:41,111
- The challenge is a
challenging challenge,
781
00:22:41,112 --> 00:22:44,114
dating from when our
language had few words.
782
00:22:44,115 --> 00:22:46,909
It will incorporate a
battery of genetic tests
783
00:22:46,910 --> 00:22:49,912
and a full neuropsychological
obstacle course,
784
00:22:49,913 --> 00:22:52,915
but it begins with
a simple question.
785
00:22:52,916 --> 00:22:54,083
Amy Wong.
786
00:22:54,084 --> 00:22:57,753
Do you or do you not
love those children?
787
00:23:01,633 --> 00:23:04,678
- More than I knew I
could love anything.
788
00:23:05,887 --> 00:23:07,889
- Which is all
that truly matters.
789
00:23:08,932 --> 00:23:10,766
The challenge is over.
790
00:23:10,767 --> 00:23:12,351
You are their mother
791
00:23:12,352 --> 00:23:14,979
and always will be.
792
00:23:20,652 --> 00:23:22,611
Oops! That wasn't
supposed to happen.
793
00:23:22,612 --> 00:23:24,446
Cheap, lousy wall.
794
00:23:24,447 --> 00:23:28,075
Children! You may now come
hug your mother and father.
795
00:23:28,076 --> 00:23:30,244
For only a small additional fee.
796
00:23:33,832 --> 00:23:36,542
- You're my favorite mommy.
797
00:23:40,922 --> 00:23:42,631
- Who wants treacle?
798
00:23:45,719 --> 00:23:47,428
- Strong stuff, huh?
799
00:23:47,478 --> 00:23:52,028
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