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1
00:00:01,220 --> 00:00:03,219
One, two, three!
2
00:00:03,220 --> 00:00:05,820
Claire: Hey, guys!
We're here!
3
00:00:05,860 --> 00:00:07,160
Welcome!
4
00:00:07,190 --> 00:00:08,830
Pool's cool,
snacks in the kitchen,
5
00:00:08,860 --> 00:00:11,830
I've had some rosé,
so fun Mitchell is in the house.
6
00:00:11,860 --> 00:00:13,660
Showing quite
a bit of leg.
7
00:00:13,700 --> 00:00:15,500
This is very...
World-cuppy?
8
00:00:16,870 --> 00:00:18,170
Jay:
There they are!
9
00:00:18,200 --> 00:00:20,670
My adult children
still sponging off me
10
00:00:20,700 --> 00:00:23,010
after nearly
five decades.
Love it.
11
00:00:23,040 --> 00:00:25,380
Sorry, thought I'd
bend that into a joke,
but it stayed real.
12
00:00:26,380 --> 00:00:28,180
-Hi, kids!
-Hey, Grandpa.
13
00:00:28,210 --> 00:00:29,380
Cameron: Come on, Lily.
Come on.
14
00:00:29,410 --> 00:00:32,350
Hey, Phil.
Hm.
15
00:00:33,380 --> 00:00:34,850
What's up his can?
16
00:00:34,880 --> 00:00:36,190
I don't know.
17
00:00:36,220 --> 00:00:38,360
Not easy being a white man
these days.
18
00:00:38,390 --> 00:00:39,690
You feel me.
19
00:00:39,720 --> 00:00:42,390
So, I got Dad and Gloria's
anniversary present.
20
00:00:42,430 --> 00:00:44,030
You guys both
owe me 40 bucks.
21
00:00:44,060 --> 00:00:45,200
Wait.
It's their anniversary?
22
00:00:45,230 --> 00:00:46,860
I-I thought it was
Gloria's birthday.
23
00:00:46,900 --> 00:00:48,200
Oh, it can't be
Gloria's birthday.
24
00:00:48,230 --> 00:00:50,030
She gets mad even
if you mention it.
25
00:00:50,070 --> 00:00:51,370
I once asked
when it was,
26
00:00:51,400 --> 00:00:53,200
and she left a dismembered
Bratz doll in my purse.
27
00:00:55,410 --> 00:00:56,710
Then why
are we here?
28
00:00:56,740 --> 00:00:59,040
You know what? I'm gonna
go check what the cake says.
29
00:00:59,080 --> 00:01:00,540
Oh, I'll have a glass
of "cake," too.
30
00:01:00,580 --> 00:01:01,910
Okay.
31
00:01:01,950 --> 00:01:03,910
Quick, before she comes back,
I need some relationship advice,
32
00:01:03,950 --> 00:01:05,920
and this is kind of
in a gray area ethically.
33
00:01:05,950 --> 00:01:07,220
Oh, and it's okay
to ask us
34
00:01:07,250 --> 00:01:08,920
because, as gays, we wouldn't
dare judge anyone
35
00:01:08,950 --> 00:01:11,050
while living such
a deviant lifestyle?
36
00:01:11,090 --> 00:01:13,890
Even the most beautiful version
of our love is a mortal stain
37
00:01:13,920 --> 00:01:16,230
compared to the worst thing
you could do?
38
00:01:16,260 --> 00:01:17,390
Maybe I should
talk to somebody else.
39
00:01:17,430 --> 00:01:19,060
-No, tell us!
-No! Spill, girl, spill!
40
00:01:19,100 --> 00:01:20,600
Okay, so just
between us,
41
00:01:20,630 --> 00:01:22,600
you know I'm with Arvin and
he's working in Switzerland.
42
00:01:22,630 --> 00:01:23,930
Well, I did
something bad.
43
00:01:24,930 --> 00:01:25,900
I kissed Dylan.
44
00:01:25,940 --> 00:01:28,410
Whoa! Whoa,
Dylan's still around?
45
00:01:28,440 --> 00:01:30,270
I-I thought he joined
a cult or something.
46
00:01:30,310 --> 00:01:32,610
I heard he ate Mentos and a Coke
and exploded.
47
00:01:32,640 --> 00:01:34,580
I don't know why I did it.
I meant nothing,
48
00:01:34,610 --> 00:01:36,610
but I feel horrible,
and Arvin keeps calling,
49
00:01:36,650 --> 00:01:38,080
but I'm not picking up
because, like --
50
00:01:38,110 --> 00:01:39,450
Do I have
to tell him?
51
00:01:39,480 --> 00:01:42,950
Uh, uh, honey, these things
happen in every relationship.
52
00:01:42,990 --> 00:01:45,760
You absolutely do not need
to tell your partner everything.
53
00:01:45,790 --> 00:01:47,920
Okay, well, that's a fun thing
to hear your husband say.
54
00:01:47,960 --> 00:01:49,590
Oh, please, do not turn this
into something.
55
00:01:49,630 --> 00:01:51,760
Well, I was going to say,
yes, you need to tell Arvin
56
00:01:51,800 --> 00:01:53,600
because you want your
relationship based on truth,
57
00:01:53,630 --> 00:01:54,960
which, apparently,
mine is not.
58
00:01:55,000 --> 00:01:56,930
Ugh, this sucks!
I don't know what to do.
59
00:01:56,970 --> 00:01:58,770
I was counting on you two
to be on the same page.
60
00:01:58,800 --> 00:02:01,270
Well,
we usually are.
When have you
ever seen that?
61
00:02:01,310 --> 00:02:02,770
What are you hens
cackling about?
62
00:02:02,810 --> 00:02:04,970
Oh, just asking how they are.
63
00:02:05,010 --> 00:02:07,140
- Gonna jump in the pool.
- Okay, see you.
64
00:02:07,180 --> 00:02:09,110
Haley doesn't care
how people are.
65
00:02:09,150 --> 00:02:10,650
What's going on?
It's nothing.
66
00:02:10,680 --> 00:02:12,950
She was just asking
for some advice.
67
00:02:12,980 --> 00:02:14,120
Why wouldn't
she come to me?
68
00:02:14,150 --> 00:02:16,450
I thought we were
finally becoming friends.
69
00:02:16,490 --> 00:02:17,820
Well, you know,
think about it, Claire.
70
00:02:17,850 --> 00:02:20,120
All the secrets that
you kept from your mom.
71
00:02:20,160 --> 00:02:22,130
Yeah, but my mom
72
00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:23,990
was an uptight, crazy person.
73
00:02:24,030 --> 00:02:26,830
Let's just slowly back away
as that settles in.
74
00:02:29,830 --> 00:02:31,840
-- Captions by VITAC --
75
00:02:34,840 --> 00:02:40,810
t1
76
00:02:44,680 --> 00:02:45,980
Hey, buddy!
77
00:02:46,020 --> 00:02:48,690
Ready for the best thing
to happen to your mouth since --
78
00:02:48,720 --> 00:02:51,820
I'm gonna bail on that.
I took off without a place to land.
79
00:02:51,860 --> 00:02:53,990
How about
a Mint "Jay-lep"?
I'll pass,
80
00:02:54,020 --> 00:02:56,160
seeing as I'm not a
hundred-year-old Southern lady.
81
00:02:58,860 --> 00:03:00,830
Phil: I finally saw the movie
"Mean Girls."
82
00:03:00,860 --> 00:03:02,670
I know.
I'm a middle-aged man.
83
00:03:02,700 --> 00:03:04,200
How'd I wait so long?
84
00:03:04,230 --> 00:03:07,500
The point is, I realized
I have a mean girl in my life --
85
00:03:07,540 --> 00:03:08,670
Jay.
86
00:03:08,710 --> 00:03:09,870
Like last week at this wedding,
87
00:03:09,910 --> 00:03:11,710
I'm rocking my moonwalk,
and Jay yells,
88
00:03:11,740 --> 00:03:15,210
"Hey, look,
it's Michael Jerkson."
89
00:03:15,250 --> 00:03:16,710
Enough's enough.
90
00:03:16,750 --> 00:03:19,520
How do you get a mean girl
to stop being a mean girl?
91
00:03:19,550 --> 00:03:22,020
Be mean girlier.
92
00:03:22,050 --> 00:03:23,520
No, no, no, no,
you're gonna love it.
93
00:03:23,550 --> 00:03:25,360
Mint Jay-leps
are all the rage.
94
00:03:25,390 --> 00:03:27,220
Oh, you keep saying
"Jay-leps."
95
00:03:27,260 --> 00:03:30,530
Yeah, well I made juleps, and --
and -- and my name's Jay,
96
00:03:30,560 --> 00:03:31,900
so I call them
"Jay-leps."
97
00:03:31,930 --> 00:03:33,560
No, I get it.
98
00:03:35,230 --> 00:03:36,700
It's just a fun thing.
99
00:03:36,730 --> 00:03:39,200
Ooh, are these the Mint Jay-leps
we've been hearing about?
100
00:03:39,240 --> 00:03:40,700
Yeah.
Oh, Jay-leps.
101
00:03:40,740 --> 00:03:42,710
Adorbs.
They are adorbs.
102
00:03:42,740 --> 00:03:44,040
Why do I
doubt myself?
103
00:03:44,070 --> 00:03:45,710
Mmm. Manny!
104
00:03:45,740 --> 00:03:46,910
How was
the road trip?
105
00:03:46,940 --> 00:03:49,910
Uh, what can I say?
Six weeks, 33 states,
106
00:03:49,950 --> 00:03:52,250
a lot of fake scrotums
on the back of pickup trucks.
107
00:03:52,280 --> 00:03:55,390
And he met a very nice girlfriend,
and he's in love.
108
00:03:55,420 --> 00:03:57,050
-Ohh!
-Let's see a pic.
109
00:03:57,090 --> 00:03:58,420
Wish I could.
110
00:03:58,460 --> 00:04:00,060
I-I went old-school
and used a film camera,
111
00:04:00,090 --> 00:04:02,560
and the one roll I took of her
fell into the Grand Canyon.
112
00:04:02,590 --> 00:04:04,390
You don't have
a single photo of her?
113
00:04:04,430 --> 00:04:07,230
Uh, well, just this blurry one
on my phone.
114
00:04:07,260 --> 00:04:08,230
-Oh, let's see.
115
00:04:08,260 --> 00:04:09,400
-Oh
-Look at her.
116
00:04:09,430 --> 00:04:10,570
Yeah, you can't really
117
00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:12,570
make her out, but it captures
her wild spirit.
118
00:04:12,600 --> 00:04:14,140
Yes.
119
00:04:16,440 --> 00:04:18,410
Is it me, or is Manny
dating Bigfoot?
Yeah.
120
00:04:18,440 --> 00:04:19,580
Let me tell you
the difference
121
00:04:19,610 --> 00:04:21,950
between Manny's girlfriend
and Bigfoot.
122
00:04:21,980 --> 00:04:23,280
Bigfoot could be real.
123
00:04:23,310 --> 00:04:24,750
She's not
a fake girlfriend.
124
00:04:24,780 --> 00:04:26,280
You want to hear
the kicker?
125
00:04:26,320 --> 00:04:27,280
She's from Canada.
126
00:04:27,320 --> 00:04:28,920
-Oh, no.
-Oh, yikes.
127
00:04:28,950 --> 00:04:31,760
Oh, stop it!
Back me up, boys.
128
00:04:31,790 --> 00:04:32,760
You know what,
Gloria?
129
00:04:32,790 --> 00:04:34,920
Canada is good
for a lot of things,
130
00:04:34,960 --> 00:04:37,430
but their number-one export
is fake girlfriends.
131
00:04:37,460 --> 00:04:39,100
Yeah, it's kind of
a thing.
132
00:04:39,130 --> 00:04:40,600
Uh, before Cam and I
came out,
133
00:04:40,630 --> 00:04:42,430
we each had
Canadian girlfriends.
134
00:04:42,470 --> 00:04:44,930
So, what are you saying now?
That Manny's gay?
135
00:04:44,970 --> 00:04:49,140
We weren't, but he does check
a few of the boxes.
136
00:04:49,170 --> 00:04:50,770
Come on.
Look at him.
137
00:04:50,810 --> 00:04:54,440
He's as straight as the swim
from Cartagena to Houston.
138
00:04:54,480 --> 00:04:57,150
The trip was amazing,
and I did the cheekiest thing.
139
00:04:57,180 --> 00:04:58,950
I saw "Oklahoma!"
in Oklahoma,
140
00:04:58,980 --> 00:05:00,620
"Chicago" in Chicago,
and then,
141
00:05:00,650 --> 00:05:03,290
I got in a little trouble
in River City.
142
00:05:03,320 --> 00:05:05,460
Mm.
Okay, that's the gayest thing
I've ever heard,
143
00:05:05,490 --> 00:05:07,620
and I shampooed dogs
in West Hollywood.
144
00:05:07,660 --> 00:05:09,130
He's had
so many girlfriends.
145
00:05:09,160 --> 00:05:11,800
The last one was
a woman in her 20s.
146
00:05:11,830 --> 00:05:13,960
Yeah, but didn't you say he was
so sweet when she stayed over
147
00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:15,130
he offered to sleep
on the couch?
148
00:05:15,160 --> 00:05:18,330
So what?
My first boyfriend at his age,
149
00:05:18,370 --> 00:05:20,000
he wasn't ready
to sleep with me.
150
00:05:20,040 --> 00:05:21,810
Mm-hmm, and
what does he do now?
151
00:05:21,840 --> 00:05:25,140
He runs a very nice
bed and breakfast.
152
00:05:25,170 --> 00:05:26,180
-With...?
-With...?
153
00:05:26,210 --> 00:05:28,010
His good friend Steven!
154
00:05:28,040 --> 00:05:29,350
Shut up!
155
00:05:30,350 --> 00:05:32,980
I-I really
feel for Manny
156
00:05:33,020 --> 00:05:34,980
if he's wrestling
with this secret.
157
00:05:35,020 --> 00:05:36,490
Yet you had
no problem keeping
158
00:05:36,520 --> 00:05:38,490
an indiscretion from me
for 16 years.
159
00:05:38,520 --> 00:05:39,690
And off we go.
Yeah.
160
00:05:39,720 --> 00:05:41,830
Just like the shorts of
that beefy UPS driver
161
00:05:41,860 --> 00:05:43,330
that delivered you
two packages that day.
162
00:05:43,360 --> 00:05:45,500
Wow, that is
not what happened!
163
00:05:45,530 --> 00:05:47,160
So, you admit
something happened!
164
00:05:47,200 --> 00:05:48,500
Okay, I'm gonna tell you
everything
165
00:05:48,530 --> 00:05:50,500
'cause it is so much tamer
than what's in your head.
166
00:05:50,530 --> 00:05:52,840
Okay.
Six weeks
into our relationship,
167
00:05:52,870 --> 00:05:54,840
before we decided
we were exclusive,
168
00:05:54,870 --> 00:05:57,340
I kissed
someone in a bar.
169
00:05:57,370 --> 00:05:59,680
See, it's not
a big deal.
Okay, yes,
it is a big deal,
170
00:05:59,710 --> 00:06:01,850
which is why
I rejected
171
00:06:01,880 --> 00:06:04,550
a very similar advance
at the same time
172
00:06:04,580 --> 00:06:06,180
from a celebrity,
173
00:06:06,220 --> 00:06:07,350
but I'm not gonna tell you
who that is,
174
00:06:07,380 --> 00:06:08,850
because I don't
want you to feel insecure.
175
00:06:08,890 --> 00:06:10,350
Cam, we both know
you're seconds away
176
00:06:10,390 --> 00:06:13,020
from telling me --
It was Isaac Mizrahi!
177
00:06:13,060 --> 00:06:14,720
Yeah, that's right.
178
00:06:14,760 --> 00:06:16,260
Cindy Crawford's friend!
179
00:06:20,100 --> 00:06:22,200
There you are.
180
00:06:22,230 --> 00:06:23,700
We haven't had a chance
to talk about anything
181
00:06:23,730 --> 00:06:25,200
since you got back.
182
00:06:25,230 --> 00:06:28,200
So, tell me about this
new Canadian girlfriend.
183
00:06:28,240 --> 00:06:30,740
Well, she's brilliant,
but humble,
184
00:06:30,770 --> 00:06:32,580
beautiful,
but accessible,
185
00:06:32,610 --> 00:06:34,240
one of the funniest people
I've ever met,
186
00:06:34,280 --> 00:06:36,210
but, also,
deeply serious.
187
00:06:36,250 --> 00:06:39,220
Ah, such lovely,
general terms.
188
00:06:39,250 --> 00:06:41,750
She sounds a little bit
too good to be true.
189
00:06:41,790 --> 00:06:43,090
What is her name?
190
00:06:43,120 --> 00:06:44,420
It's Sherry Shaker.
191
00:06:45,460 --> 00:06:47,090
Sherry Shaker?
192
00:06:47,120 --> 00:06:49,760
Those are the two things that
are in front of you at this bar.
193
00:06:49,790 --> 00:06:51,600
Delightful!
194
00:06:51,630 --> 00:06:52,760
Manny...
195
00:06:52,800 --> 00:06:55,400
is there anything
that you need to tell me?
196
00:06:55,430 --> 00:06:57,730
Maybe some kind of...
197
00:06:57,770 --> 00:06:59,570
sexual thing?
198
00:06:59,600 --> 00:07:00,600
Um...
199
00:07:01,770 --> 00:07:03,910
I really don't want
to talk about this.
200
00:07:03,940 --> 00:07:05,910
Okay, papi,
but you know I love you
201
00:07:05,940 --> 00:07:07,440
and that you can be
honest with me
202
00:07:07,480 --> 00:07:09,280
about anything, right?
203
00:07:09,310 --> 00:07:11,250
In that case...
204
00:07:11,280 --> 00:07:12,750
This is a lot.
205
00:07:12,780 --> 00:07:14,280
I'm pretty
desensitized to it,
206
00:07:14,320 --> 00:07:15,990
but I saw Luke
walk into a wall.
207
00:07:21,290 --> 00:07:22,760
What are you guys
laughing at?
208
00:07:22,790 --> 00:07:24,260
Oh, I wouldn't
worry about it.
209
00:07:24,290 --> 00:07:25,800
You said something funny,
didn't you?
210
00:07:25,830 --> 00:07:27,760
The guy's
a joke machine!
Mm-hmm.
211
00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:29,270
Oh, someone's
sitting there.
Who?
212
00:07:29,300 --> 00:07:31,640
Someone who doesn't ask
a million questions.
213
00:07:32,800 --> 00:07:34,340
Grandpa,
you can sit with us.
214
00:07:36,970 --> 00:07:37,940
Great.
215
00:07:37,970 --> 00:07:40,440
It was working,
but it was killing me.
216
00:07:40,480 --> 00:07:42,950
I've actually had dreams
where the only thing happening
217
00:07:42,980 --> 00:07:45,110
was me sitting with Jay
while he, you know,
218
00:07:45,150 --> 00:07:47,280
tousles my hair,
calling me "Sport."
219
00:07:47,320 --> 00:07:48,790
Congrats, honey.
220
00:07:48,820 --> 00:07:51,290
Always proud to celebrate
one of your awards.
221
00:07:51,320 --> 00:07:52,960
I didn't
win an award.
222
00:07:52,990 --> 00:07:54,790
Well, then, what
are we all doing here?
223
00:07:54,820 --> 00:07:56,290
I'm a busy man!
224
00:07:56,330 --> 00:07:58,960
Don't you
just golf now?
I work
when it's raining.
225
00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:00,460
Why am I defending myself
to you?
226
00:08:00,500 --> 00:08:01,800
And why is your father
mad at me?
227
00:08:01,830 --> 00:08:03,630
Did I do something?
Probably.
228
00:08:03,670 --> 00:08:05,000
Isn't that
your relationship?
229
00:08:05,030 --> 00:08:07,640
He's always desperate for your
approval and you shoot him down?
230
00:08:07,670 --> 00:08:09,470
It's supposed to be, but
all of a sudden, he's, like...
231
00:08:09,510 --> 00:08:11,810
all cold.
232
00:08:11,840 --> 00:08:13,140
Wouldn't let me
sit with him.
233
00:08:13,180 --> 00:08:15,510
Ugh, so high school.
234
00:08:15,550 --> 00:08:17,150
Dad and I watched "Mean Girls"
the other night,
235
00:08:17,180 --> 00:08:18,820
and I chewed off
a piece of my hair
236
00:08:18,850 --> 00:08:20,720
reliving
how awful it was.
237
00:08:21,690 --> 00:08:22,850
Wait.
238
00:08:22,890 --> 00:08:25,660
In the movie, the heroine
takes down the head mean girl
239
00:08:25,690 --> 00:08:27,660
by being mean to her.
240
00:08:27,690 --> 00:08:29,360
Maybe that's what Dad
is doing to you?
241
00:08:30,530 --> 00:08:32,160
Son of a bitch.
242
00:08:32,200 --> 00:08:34,160
Phil thinks
he can "Mean Girls" me?
243
00:08:34,200 --> 00:08:36,000
How lame is that?
Let me tell you something --
244
00:08:36,030 --> 00:08:38,330
I might be a pretty face,
but I fight to win.
245
00:08:38,370 --> 00:08:40,070
Just like "Legally Blonde"!
246
00:08:42,570 --> 00:08:44,670
Oh, you're not looking
at your phone.
247
00:08:44,710 --> 00:08:46,880
Is everything okay?
Yeah, everything's fine.
248
00:08:46,910 --> 00:08:49,010
You know,
if something was on your mind,
249
00:08:49,050 --> 00:08:51,350
I'm an excellent person
to confide in.
250
00:08:51,380 --> 00:08:52,680
No judgment.
251
00:08:52,720 --> 00:08:55,350
God knows I've done some stuff
I'm not proud of.
252
00:08:55,380 --> 00:08:57,550
Like what?
253
00:08:58,590 --> 00:09:00,690
J-Just like...
254
00:09:00,720 --> 00:09:02,360
shoplifting.
255
00:09:02,390 --> 00:09:04,530
Wow. Really?
Mm-hmm.
256
00:09:04,560 --> 00:09:06,200
I mean, no judgment here --
I do it, too.
257
00:09:06,230 --> 00:09:08,200
What? You do?
258
00:09:08,230 --> 00:09:10,030
Yeah, but I'm very ethical
about it.
259
00:09:10,070 --> 00:09:12,740
I only take things from
companies that use child labor.
260
00:09:12,770 --> 00:09:15,370
That is how my generation
is saving the world.
261
00:09:15,400 --> 00:09:18,540
Haley, I did not
raise you to steal.
262
00:09:18,570 --> 00:09:20,040
You just said
you do it, too!
263
00:09:20,080 --> 00:09:21,540
I made that up
so you would tell me
264
00:09:21,580 --> 00:09:23,210
what's going on
in your life!
Why would I?
265
00:09:23,250 --> 00:09:25,050
Stuff a couple Pakistani
lipsticks in my purse,
266
00:09:25,080 --> 00:09:26,420
and you freak out at me!
267
00:09:29,450 --> 00:09:31,920
Well, well, well, if it isn't
John, Paul, and George.
268
00:09:31,960 --> 00:09:33,390
Anyone need a Ringo?
269
00:09:33,420 --> 00:09:35,220
Actually, we can get by
270
00:09:35,260 --> 00:09:37,260
without a little help
from you, friend.
271
00:09:38,590 --> 00:09:39,900
Well...
272
00:09:39,930 --> 00:09:42,100
pool's so over,
anyways.
273
00:09:42,130 --> 00:09:45,070
Maybe, uh, the guys
want to hit the H2O,
274
00:09:45,100 --> 00:09:46,570
rock some Marco Polo.
275
00:09:46,600 --> 00:09:48,440
Good for you not
letting that chest
276
00:09:48,470 --> 00:09:50,270
get in the way
of having fun.
277
00:09:50,310 --> 00:09:52,080
Most guys
wouldn't go shirtless
278
00:09:52,110 --> 00:09:53,580
until they got
a little...
279
00:09:53,610 --> 00:09:54,640
muscle.
280
00:09:55,980 --> 00:09:57,750
We need to talk.
Wait. Something weird
is happening.
281
00:09:57,780 --> 00:09:59,420
I want to see
how it plays out.
282
00:09:59,450 --> 00:10:01,420
Who's ready
to hit the pool?
283
00:10:01,450 --> 00:10:02,420
Marco!
284
00:10:02,450 --> 00:10:04,820
Solo!
285
00:10:07,960 --> 00:10:11,260
Okay, I know emotional slights
usually roll off me
286
00:10:11,290 --> 00:10:13,600
like water
off a mule's back --
Isn't it "duck"?
287
00:10:13,630 --> 00:10:15,600
Uh, a lot of animals bead,
Mitchell.
Mm-hmm.
288
00:10:15,630 --> 00:10:17,600
The point is
I need to know details.
289
00:10:17,630 --> 00:10:19,600
I need to know
what happened...
290
00:10:19,640 --> 00:10:21,100
...and with whom.
291
00:10:21,140 --> 00:10:23,270
Was it a peck?
Was it with Pepper?
292
00:10:23,310 --> 00:10:24,440
Was he drunk?
293
00:10:24,470 --> 00:10:25,980
Did you get a peck
from a pickled Pepper?
294
00:10:26,010 --> 00:10:27,440
How long have you been
sitting on that?
295
00:10:27,480 --> 00:10:29,610
You kissed a man
six week--
296
00:10:29,650 --> 00:10:31,310
-Hi.
-Hi.
297
00:10:32,980 --> 00:10:35,450
You kissed a man six weeks
into our relationship
298
00:10:35,480 --> 00:10:37,290
when I'm telling you
"I love you."
299
00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:39,460
I'm calling my mom,
telling her I'd met the one
300
00:10:39,490 --> 00:10:41,990
while you're sidled up next to
some cha-cha queen at a urinal.
301
00:10:42,030 --> 00:10:44,130
Okay, this insane reaction
is proof
302
00:10:44,160 --> 00:10:45,460
that I did the right thing
not telling you.
303
00:10:45,490 --> 00:10:47,460
Okay, everyone knows
this kind of secret
304
00:10:47,500 --> 00:10:48,970
is poison, Mitchell.
305
00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:50,170
Oh, yeah?
Yeah.
306
00:10:50,200 --> 00:10:51,840
Let's take it
to the room.
307
00:10:51,870 --> 00:10:53,970
Hey, you all heard
that whole conversation, right?
308
00:10:54,000 --> 00:10:55,140
Of course, yeah.
Sí.
Yeah.
309
00:10:55,170 --> 00:10:58,140
So, Phil,
if Claire kissed someone
310
00:10:58,170 --> 00:11:01,680
very early into the relationship,
should she have told you?
311
00:11:01,710 --> 00:11:03,310
-Of course.
-No way.
312
00:11:03,350 --> 00:11:05,150
What?
Did you kiss someone?
313
00:11:05,180 --> 00:11:07,980
See? Secrets.
Tearing them apart.
314
00:11:08,020 --> 00:11:09,990
Mitch and Cam,
I just want you to know
315
00:11:10,020 --> 00:11:11,990
that I support
your lifestyle,
316
00:11:12,020 --> 00:11:13,860
and I find it
very charming
317
00:11:13,890 --> 00:11:16,330
when your people
act very emotional
318
00:11:16,360 --> 00:11:18,530
and inappropriate
in public.
319
00:11:18,560 --> 00:11:20,500
Okay, so I'm getting
no help from this room.
320
00:11:20,530 --> 00:11:23,000
I'm sorry, but kissing someone
outside of a relationship
321
00:11:23,030 --> 00:11:25,000
is a big deal and you should
fess up right away.
322
00:11:25,030 --> 00:11:26,340
You told them?!
323
00:11:26,370 --> 00:11:27,840
Yes! Yes, they told us
everything,
324
00:11:27,870 --> 00:11:29,340
and I can't believe
you did that!
325
00:11:29,370 --> 00:11:32,010
Well, I'm sorry, but Dylan
was a huge part of my life --
326
00:11:32,040 --> 00:11:34,510
You kissed Dylan?!
That's your secret?
327
00:11:34,540 --> 00:11:35,680
You tricked me!
328
00:11:35,710 --> 00:11:37,380
What are you doing?
329
00:11:37,410 --> 00:11:39,850
You are dating
a world-renowned scientist.
330
00:11:39,880 --> 00:11:41,680
I mean, isn't Dylan
still married
331
00:11:41,720 --> 00:11:43,190
and still an idiot?
332
00:11:43,220 --> 00:11:45,520
Hey, he is
not still married.
333
00:11:45,550 --> 00:11:47,860
And he's getting his life together.
He's in nursing school.
334
00:11:47,890 --> 00:11:50,190
Good for him.
I love Dylan.
335
00:11:50,230 --> 00:11:51,900
Honey,
she's dating Arvin.
336
00:11:51,930 --> 00:11:53,360
We love Arvin now.
337
00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:54,860
And wouldn't
it be wonderful
338
00:11:54,900 --> 00:11:58,700
if someone called Dylan
loved someone called Arvin?
339
00:11:58,730 --> 00:12:01,370
No one in this room would have
a problem with it.
340
00:12:01,400 --> 00:12:04,210
Am I wrong, or is your mom
trying to get Alex
341
00:12:04,240 --> 00:12:05,410
to come out
of the closet?
342
00:12:06,740 --> 00:12:08,210
Oh, God,
it's Arvin calling.
343
00:12:08,240 --> 00:12:10,250
Quick, a show of hands,
who thinks I have to tell him?
344
00:12:11,410 --> 00:12:12,550
One, two, three, four.
345
00:12:12,580 --> 00:12:14,450
Four out of nine?
A frickin' tie?!
346
00:12:16,290 --> 00:12:18,750
Yay, I'm so happy
I finally reached you!
347
00:12:18,790 --> 00:12:20,060
I know.
348
00:12:20,090 --> 00:12:22,760
How's work?
Any major breakthroughs?
349
00:12:22,790 --> 00:12:24,890
Oh, well,
I-I made a German laugh.
350
00:12:26,430 --> 00:12:28,400
Oh, I miss you terribly.
351
00:12:28,430 --> 00:12:30,600
I miss you, too.
352
00:12:30,630 --> 00:12:33,070
Uh, listen,
um, we have to talk.
353
00:12:33,100 --> 00:12:36,440
I love you, and this is
really hard for me to say,
354
00:12:36,470 --> 00:12:38,070
but, I, um...
355
00:12:38,110 --> 00:12:39,910
I did something stupid.
356
00:12:39,940 --> 00:12:42,110
I kissed my ex-boyfriend.
It meant nothing, I swear,
357
00:12:42,150 --> 00:12:45,110
and I'm hoping you'll forgive me,
and we can forget this ever happened.
358
00:12:47,120 --> 00:12:48,920
Sorry, love,
you froze up.
359
00:12:48,950 --> 00:12:50,920
I-I-I missed the --
the whole thing.
360
00:12:50,950 --> 00:12:52,620
Oh, that sucks.
Um...
361
00:12:54,290 --> 00:12:56,590
This is really hard for me,
but I did something stupid.
362
00:12:56,630 --> 00:12:58,790
I kissed my ex-boyfriend.
It meant nothing, and I --
363
00:12:58,830 --> 00:13:02,100
Sorry, froze up again
in the funniest position.
364
00:13:02,130 --> 00:13:04,270
You look like you'd smelled
something dreadful.
365
00:13:04,300 --> 00:13:05,940
Have another go.
Okay.
366
00:13:05,970 --> 00:13:08,270
- I messed up, and I kiss--
- Wait!
367
00:13:08,300 --> 00:13:09,610
Okay, go.
368
00:13:09,640 --> 00:13:10,970
I kissed
my ex-boyfriend!
369
00:13:12,480 --> 00:13:15,280
Damn it,
stop freezing!
370
00:13:15,310 --> 00:13:17,950
Not frozen.
371
00:13:17,980 --> 00:13:19,980
Shocked.
372
00:13:20,020 --> 00:13:21,780
Very hurt, actually.
373
00:13:21,820 --> 00:13:23,290
I'm so sorry.
374
00:13:23,320 --> 00:13:25,120
It meant nothing.
Can --
375
00:13:25,150 --> 00:13:26,620
Can we please
move past this?
376
00:13:26,660 --> 00:13:27,660
I don't know.
377
00:13:27,690 --> 00:13:29,790
Um, we said that
we loved each other.
378
00:13:29,830 --> 00:13:31,630
I-I trusted you.
379
00:13:31,660 --> 00:13:34,130
What I want to do is hang up
on you right now.
380
00:13:34,160 --> 00:13:35,460
Wait, I --
381
00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:41,140
Well, I told him, and it
couldn't have gone worse.
382
00:13:41,170 --> 00:13:42,140
-Oh, no.
-Oh, I'm sorry.
383
00:13:42,170 --> 00:13:43,970
He broke up with you.
Not yet.
384
00:13:44,010 --> 00:13:45,840
He just
hung up on me.
385
00:13:45,880 --> 00:13:47,640
Oh, come here, honey.
386
00:13:47,680 --> 00:13:50,850
I'm -- I'm so sorry, and I know
why you didn't come to me.
387
00:13:50,880 --> 00:13:53,320
I haven't always been
Dylan's biggest fan.
388
00:13:53,350 --> 00:13:55,020
You pushed him
into a beehive.
389
00:13:55,050 --> 00:13:56,990
You know, to be fair,
I pushed him off of you,
390
00:13:57,020 --> 00:13:58,490
and he fell
into the beehive,
391
00:13:58,520 --> 00:14:02,360
but, regardless,
I want to be supportive.
392
00:14:02,390 --> 00:14:04,330
No judgment.
I promise. I promise.
393
00:14:04,360 --> 00:14:06,700
I can't believe
how stupid I was.
394
00:14:06,730 --> 00:14:08,160
I let Dylan
get in my head,
395
00:14:08,200 --> 00:14:10,000
and now I might have ruined
everything with Arvin.
396
00:14:10,030 --> 00:14:11,500
-Mnh.
-So...
397
00:14:11,530 --> 00:14:13,170
what we're learning
is that
398
00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:15,340
sometimes it is better
to keep the secret.
399
00:14:15,370 --> 00:14:17,510
You can't be
proud of that.
400
00:14:17,540 --> 00:14:19,010
Look, honey, sometimes
these things happen.
401
00:14:19,040 --> 00:14:20,180
They happened with them,
402
00:14:20,210 --> 00:14:21,680
but that turned out to be
a good thing.
403
00:14:21,710 --> 00:14:22,850
I'm sorry.
In what way?
404
00:14:22,880 --> 00:14:25,510
Because after Mitchell
kissed the guy in the bar,
405
00:14:25,550 --> 00:14:27,180
he called me crying,
406
00:14:27,220 --> 00:14:29,690
so tortured.
407
00:14:29,720 --> 00:14:31,220
He said
the second he did it,
408
00:14:31,250 --> 00:14:32,860
he knew
he wanted to spend
409
00:14:32,890 --> 00:14:35,220
the rest of his life
with Cam.
410
00:14:35,260 --> 00:14:36,860
Mitchell, is that true?
Why didn't you say that?
411
00:14:36,890 --> 00:14:39,860
Because we've been together
for 15 years, Cam.
412
00:14:39,900 --> 00:14:41,700
I got defensive.
I'm sorry.
413
00:14:41,730 --> 00:14:44,230
No. I'm sorry.
414
00:14:44,270 --> 00:14:45,530
You know,
I freaked out,
415
00:14:45,570 --> 00:14:47,870
and I made this whole day
about myself.
416
00:14:47,900 --> 00:14:51,070
And you're right -- I can be
self-centered and emotional.
417
00:14:51,910 --> 00:14:53,040
I guess it's, you know,
418
00:14:53,080 --> 00:14:55,540
because of all that time
my daddy spent with his pigs.
419
00:14:55,580 --> 00:14:56,580
Cam.
Please.
420
00:14:56,610 --> 00:14:57,880
It's time.
Mm-hmm.
421
00:15:00,250 --> 00:15:02,720
Haley, you're not
a bad person.
422
00:15:02,750 --> 00:15:05,250
Maybe this kiss taught you
something you needed to know,
423
00:15:05,290 --> 00:15:07,060
just like it did
with Uncle Mitch.
424
00:15:07,090 --> 00:15:08,760
If that's the case,
425
00:15:08,790 --> 00:15:11,060
you need to fight
for the man you love
426
00:15:11,090 --> 00:15:12,930
and shut it down
with the one you don't.
427
00:15:12,960 --> 00:15:14,730
You're right.
Mm-hmm.
428
00:15:14,760 --> 00:15:16,600
I have to go see Dylan.
Okay.
429
00:15:17,770 --> 00:15:20,270
Be strong.
Don't let him manipulate you.
430
00:15:20,300 --> 00:15:23,570
He can be a very em--
She's good.
431
00:15:23,610 --> 00:15:24,770
She's good.
432
00:15:26,780 --> 00:15:29,750
Ah, so happy
that you came out.
433
00:15:29,780 --> 00:15:31,080
What's going on
with you?
434
00:15:31,110 --> 00:15:32,750
Where did you
get that raft?
435
00:15:32,780 --> 00:15:36,250
It was in a gift bag from
a very moving Pride benefit
436
00:15:36,290 --> 00:15:38,090
that I went to
with Mitch and Cam.
437
00:15:38,120 --> 00:15:39,920
If you want to know if I'm gay,
just ask me.
438
00:15:39,960 --> 00:15:42,430
No, I don't want
to be pushy.
439
00:15:42,460 --> 00:15:44,260
I like women, Mom!
440
00:15:44,290 --> 00:15:45,930
Why on Earth
would you think I'm gay?
441
00:15:45,960 --> 00:15:48,600
In fairness, you do check
a lot of the boxes.
442
00:15:48,630 --> 00:15:50,270
I only thought it
because Jay said
443
00:15:50,300 --> 00:15:52,940
that the Canadian girlfriends
are fake
444
00:15:52,970 --> 00:15:55,100
and that Mitch and Cam
had them.
445
00:15:55,140 --> 00:15:56,770
You think
my girlfriend is fake?
446
00:15:56,810 --> 00:15:58,310
Well, you didn't have
any pictures,
447
00:15:58,340 --> 00:16:00,110
and at the bar,
you said that her name
448
00:16:00,140 --> 00:16:03,310
was something like
Olive Cocktail-napkin.
449
00:16:03,350 --> 00:16:04,950
It's Sherry Shaker!
450
00:16:04,980 --> 00:16:06,450
I am sorry,
451
00:16:06,480 --> 00:16:09,790
but when I asked you if you
were hiding something from me,
452
00:16:09,820 --> 00:16:12,790
you got all defensive,
and you boob-shamed me.
453
00:16:12,820 --> 00:16:14,790
Because something
did happen.
454
00:16:14,820 --> 00:16:16,630
Sherry and I...
455
00:16:16,660 --> 00:16:18,460
we joined our...
456
00:16:18,490 --> 00:16:20,130
We crossed that
beauteous threshold
457
00:16:20,160 --> 00:16:22,300
into the physical
expression of love.
458
00:16:22,330 --> 00:16:25,300
Have you ever heard a straight
guy describe sex that way?
459
00:16:25,330 --> 00:16:26,800
That's what
he meant?
460
00:16:26,840 --> 00:16:28,970
Why does that
feel worse to me?
461
00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:30,970
Hey, Alex.
You're the last virgin.
462
00:16:31,010 --> 00:16:33,980
Please,
I'm dating a fireman.
463
00:16:34,010 --> 00:16:35,510
I'm having
hotter sex than...
464
00:16:38,550 --> 00:16:39,820
Hey, Dad?
465
00:16:39,850 --> 00:16:41,180
What are you doing?
466
00:16:45,350 --> 00:16:47,820
He wouldn't.
467
00:16:47,860 --> 00:16:50,830
I realized he
was "Mean Girls-ing" me back
468
00:16:50,860 --> 00:16:52,660
with a weird nod
to "Legally Blonde,"
469
00:16:52,700 --> 00:16:54,500
which I'll bet he thinks
I didn't notice.
470
00:16:54,530 --> 00:16:56,000
I had to change tactics.
471
00:16:56,030 --> 00:16:57,330
I had to stop acting
like a mean girl
472
00:16:57,370 --> 00:16:59,840
and do the last thing Jay
would ever expect me to do --
473
00:16:59,870 --> 00:17:01,670
act like a man.
474
00:17:01,700 --> 00:17:03,010
What the hell
are you doing?!
475
00:17:03,040 --> 00:17:04,510
Oh, yeah, well,
everybody's hungry,
476
00:17:04,540 --> 00:17:06,010
and the prevailing opinion
is that
477
00:17:06,040 --> 00:17:07,380
I'm a better griller
than you.
478
00:17:07,410 --> 00:17:08,680
No.
479
00:17:08,710 --> 00:17:11,180
Wow. You must think
you're pretty tough.
480
00:17:11,210 --> 00:17:13,350
Not as tough
as your meat.
Claire!
481
00:17:13,380 --> 00:17:15,680
Yes, good,
everybody get out here!
482
00:17:15,720 --> 00:17:16,850
What?
What's going on?
483
00:17:16,890 --> 00:17:19,360
It's Phil!
Phil is grilling!
484
00:17:19,390 --> 00:17:21,360
This bozo just told me
485
00:17:21,390 --> 00:17:23,360
that you think
I overcook your meat.
486
00:17:23,390 --> 00:17:24,360
Is that true?
487
00:17:24,390 --> 00:17:25,860
-Uh...
-Uh...
488
00:17:27,230 --> 00:17:28,560
Luke?!
489
00:17:32,570 --> 00:17:34,570
Dad,
we love you, but...
490
00:17:35,240 --> 00:17:37,370
...you don't know
what medium-rare is.
491
00:17:37,410 --> 00:17:38,870
I've -- I've given you
a meat thermometer
492
00:17:38,910 --> 00:17:40,210
for three Father's Days
in a row.
493
00:17:40,240 --> 00:17:41,540
For the love of God,
just use one!
494
00:17:41,580 --> 00:17:43,550
Fine.
See if I care.
495
00:17:43,580 --> 00:17:46,050
But I don't know what
you have against me today --
496
00:17:46,080 --> 00:17:47,750
kicking a man
off his own grill,
497
00:17:47,780 --> 00:17:49,550
making fun
of my Mint Jay-leps.
498
00:17:49,590 --> 00:17:52,220
You made fun
of his Mint Jay-leps?
499
00:17:52,260 --> 00:17:53,920
He did them for you.
500
00:17:53,960 --> 00:17:56,060
What?
I don't know
what she's talking about.
501
00:17:56,090 --> 00:17:58,430
The minute Jay
created the Jay-leps,
502
00:17:58,460 --> 00:18:01,100
all he could
keep saying was,
503
00:18:01,130 --> 00:18:03,070
"Phil's gonna get
such a kick out of this."
504
00:18:03,100 --> 00:18:04,770
But he didn't!
He said it was dumb!
505
00:18:04,800 --> 00:18:06,600
He said it was
an old lady's drink!
506
00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:08,570
Since when do you care
what I think?
507
00:18:08,600 --> 00:18:09,770
Always!
508
00:18:09,810 --> 00:18:11,410
He thinks that you're
the life of the party.
509
00:18:11,440 --> 00:18:12,740
He wants
to be more like you.
510
00:18:12,780 --> 00:18:14,910
All I've said
is that sometimes
511
00:18:14,940 --> 00:18:17,750
I envy people
who don't mind being an ass
512
00:18:17,780 --> 00:18:19,080
because
they're having fun,
513
00:18:19,110 --> 00:18:20,750
and I guess...
514
00:18:20,780 --> 00:18:22,290
you're one
of those people.
515
00:18:22,320 --> 00:18:23,920
Wow, so all this time,
516
00:18:23,950 --> 00:18:26,760
you've been mean to me
because you admire me so much?
517
00:18:26,790 --> 00:18:29,790
Eh.
Hey, look at me.
518
00:18:29,830 --> 00:18:31,930
I loved
those Mint Jay-leps.
519
00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:33,430
You did?
Yeah.
520
00:18:33,460 --> 00:18:35,130
Did you hear that, Gloria?
He did.
521
00:18:35,160 --> 00:18:36,930
I only trashed them because
of what you called me
522
00:18:36,970 --> 00:18:38,270
when I was dancing
at the wedding.
523
00:18:38,300 --> 00:18:41,270
What? Flail Dunphy?
Shrill Dummy?
524
00:18:41,300 --> 00:18:42,770
When you dropped your drink --
Spill Bumbly?
525
00:18:42,810 --> 00:18:44,110
Michael Jerkson.
526
00:18:44,140 --> 00:18:45,770
Oh, yeah.
I forgot about that one.
527
00:18:45,810 --> 00:18:48,610
- I'm sorry.
- don't worry about it.
528
00:18:48,640 --> 00:18:49,780
What are we doing?
529
00:18:49,810 --> 00:18:51,810
Did you just
call me "Sport"?
Huh?
530
00:18:55,150 --> 00:18:56,290
Haley.
531
00:18:56,320 --> 00:18:57,950
I had a feeling
it was gonna be you.
532
00:18:57,990 --> 00:18:59,290
You buzzed me
in the gate.
533
00:18:59,320 --> 00:19:01,620
Do you have a minute?
Sure, my roommates and I
534
00:19:01,660 --> 00:19:03,660
are just studying
for physiology midterms.
535
00:19:03,690 --> 00:19:05,790
Oh, she cute.
Thanks, girl.
536
00:19:05,830 --> 00:19:06,960
That hair is on point.
537
00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:09,300
I bought it
yesterday.
Oh.
538
00:19:09,330 --> 00:19:10,800
Can we talk out here?
539
00:19:14,840 --> 00:19:16,470
Listen, I need you
to know that
540
00:19:16,510 --> 00:19:17,970
that kiss never
should have happened.
541
00:19:18,010 --> 00:19:20,980
Arvin and I are together,
and you and I are friends,
542
00:19:21,010 --> 00:19:22,650
and that's all
we're ever going to be.
543
00:19:22,680 --> 00:19:24,350
No, thank you.
544
00:19:24,380 --> 00:19:26,680
"No, thank you"?
I didn't ask you a question.
545
00:19:26,720 --> 00:19:28,350
Well, let me
ask you one.
546
00:19:28,380 --> 00:19:31,320
It's been 10 years,
and I can't move on from you.
547
00:19:31,350 --> 00:19:33,320
Also not a question.
548
00:19:33,360 --> 00:19:34,990
Remember
the day we met?
549
00:19:35,020 --> 00:19:36,160
I was walking
through the halls,
550
00:19:36,190 --> 00:19:38,330
and I saw
the most beautiful girl,
551
00:19:38,360 --> 00:19:40,330
and I was like,
"Whoa! Who is that?"
552
00:19:40,360 --> 00:19:42,530
And you were like,
"That's Rebecca Salkin."
553
00:19:42,570 --> 00:19:44,500
And then I turned and
saw you for the first time,
554
00:19:44,530 --> 00:19:46,540
and I was done
with Rebecca Salkin.
555
00:19:46,570 --> 00:19:50,170
Yeah, you were wearing that
cool, beat-up Army jacket,
556
00:19:50,210 --> 00:19:53,680
and I was completely jealous
of your eyelashes.
557
00:19:53,710 --> 00:19:55,510
Haley...
558
00:19:55,540 --> 00:19:58,350
I fell in love with you that
day, and I've never stopped.
559
00:19:58,380 --> 00:20:01,850
I'm gonna keep making myself
better until I deserve you.
560
00:20:03,750 --> 00:20:06,520
♪♪
561
00:20:06,560 --> 00:20:09,860
Haley: Why is it so hard
to be honest in relationships?
562
00:20:09,890 --> 00:20:11,690
We play games.
563
00:20:11,730 --> 00:20:13,100
We keep secrets...
564
00:20:15,230 --> 00:20:17,700
I don't remember
crying to you about that kiss.
565
00:20:17,730 --> 00:20:19,700
The truth wasn't
moving the needle.
566
00:20:19,740 --> 00:20:20,870
You're welcome.
567
00:20:20,900 --> 00:20:22,410
...when all we want to do
is connect.
568
00:20:22,440 --> 00:20:24,370
Everyone,
listen up!
569
00:20:24,410 --> 00:20:25,570
Sherry:
Hi, I'm Sherry.
570
00:20:25,610 --> 00:20:28,210
I'm Manny's real
Canadian girlfriend.
571
00:20:28,240 --> 00:20:30,050
This isn't the first time
I've had to do this.
572
00:20:30,080 --> 00:20:31,050
Claire: Hi!
573
00:20:31,080 --> 00:20:32,110
-Hi!
-Hi!
574
00:20:33,750 --> 00:20:38,390
I guess we have to start with
being honest with ourselves.
575
00:20:38,420 --> 00:20:39,960
And if I'm being honest...
576
00:20:41,760 --> 00:20:43,790
...I love two people.
577
00:20:45,090 --> 00:20:46,430
Damn it!
578
00:20:48,460 --> 00:20:50,430
Can we go?
Are we waiting for cake, or...?
579
00:20:50,470 --> 00:20:52,600
-Is it a birthday?
-Should I make a toast?
580
00:20:52,640 --> 00:20:53,600
-To what?
-To whom?
581
00:20:53,640 --> 00:20:57,070
All right! It's come to my attention
through a series of assumptions,
582
00:20:57,110 --> 00:21:00,080
old e-mails,
and lazy, sheep-like thinking
583
00:21:00,110 --> 00:21:02,750
that we may have
gathered for no reason.
584
00:21:02,780 --> 00:21:04,750
So, it's not
my welcome-home party?
585
00:21:04,780 --> 00:21:06,080
-Of course, it --
-Nope!
586
00:21:06,110 --> 00:21:08,080
Your mother thought Alex
won an award, she didn't,
587
00:21:08,120 --> 00:21:09,280
and the dry spell
continues.
588
00:21:09,320 --> 00:21:13,320
Please,
the last thing I'm having is a dry...spell.
589
00:21:14,320 --> 00:21:17,290
People, listen up.
There are too many actual reasons
590
00:21:17,330 --> 00:21:18,430
for us to see each other.
591
00:21:18,460 --> 00:21:21,260
We cannot afford
to hang out by mistake!
592
00:21:21,300 --> 00:21:23,130
I love you all.
Now go home.
593
00:21:23,170 --> 00:21:24,670
-Okay, well, great.
-All right, let's go.
594
00:21:24,671 --> 00:21:26,671
t1
595
00:21:26,672 --> 00:21:28,672
t343466
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