All language subtitles for T.M.F.UNCLE_S03-E30 The Cap and Gown Affair (DVDRip)

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt-PT Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:39,959 --> 00:00:42,155 Williams to Solo. Do you read me? 2 00:00:42,328 --> 00:00:43,489 Loud and clear. Go ahead. 3 00:00:43,663 --> 00:00:45,859 38th Street clear as far as Eighth Avenue. 4 00:00:46,032 --> 00:00:50,333 Repeat. No sign of possible Thrush activity as far as Eighth Avenue. 5 00:00:50,503 --> 00:00:53,404 Roget. Ova! and out. “Na? 6 00:00:53,706 --> 00:00:55,572 [OVER RADIO] Williams reports 38th Street clear. 7 00:00:55,742 --> 00:00:57,608 - Nat a Thrushie in sight. - I wouldn't bet on it. 8 00:01:05,618 --> 00:01:07,780 How soon before we reach the rendezvous point? 9 00:01:07,954 --> 00:01:09,513 In about six minutes, we should, uh... 10 00:01:10,857 --> 00:01:12,882 Wail a second. Hang on. “Na. 11 00:01:13,392 --> 00:01:16,089 - Solo here. - I'm at Checkpoint David. 12 00:01:16,262 --> 00:01:18,959 - All clear as far as Madison. - Roger. 13 00:01:19,132 --> 00:01:24,332 Helicopter 490 has made a thorough check of Zone G, as in “George.“ 14 00:01:24,504 --> 00:01:26,029 No foreseeable problems. 15 00:01:26,539 --> 00:01:27,768 Did you hear that, IIIya? 16 00:01:27,940 --> 00:01:31,399 I heard, but I'm still dubious. 17 00:03:00,633 --> 00:03:02,533 WAVERLY: Yes, I've already paid my compliments... 18 00:03:02,702 --> 00:03:04,636 ...to the people in Section Five. 19 00:03:05,705 --> 00:03:09,938 That dummy they made is astonishingly like me. 20 00:03:10,743 --> 00:03:14,737 So much so that I'm rather glad now Thrush didn't manage to destroy it. 21 00:03:14,914 --> 00:03:19,511 It might be a good idea to cancel all public appearances for a while, sir. 22 00:03:19,685 --> 00:03:22,313 Well, perhaps so, Mr. Solo. 23 00:03:23,122 --> 00:03:25,682 But there's one that I can't possibly avoid. 24 00:03:25,858 --> 00:03:27,189 Nor do I wish to do so. 25 00:03:27,360 --> 00:03:29,294 Blair University. 26 00:03:29,695 --> 00:03:31,561 My alma mater. 27 00:03:32,398 --> 00:03:35,993 And certainly, Thrush isn't gonna prevent me from getting that honorary degree. 28 00:03:36,168 --> 00:03:38,364 I'm quite certain that Thrush will do their best... 29 00:03:38,537 --> 00:03:40,699 ...to make sure the award is posthumous. 30 00:03:42,375 --> 00:03:44,469 I was rather hoping that you and Mr. Kuryakin... 31 00:03:44,644 --> 00:03:46,612 ...would do your best to see that it isn't. 32 00:03:47,280 --> 00:03:50,272 IIIya's already there, uh. scouting the terrain. I'll join him tomorrow. 33 00:03:50,449 --> 00:03:51,848 Good. 34 00:04:00,159 --> 00:04:02,355 Oh, and Mr. Solo... 35 00:04:03,462 --> 00:04:08,195 Mr. Solo, Blair is a coeducation institution... 36 00:04:08,367 --> 00:04:12,270 ...so try to curb your predatory instincts, will you? 37 00:04:13,072 --> 00:04:14,597 Yes, sir. 38 00:04:17,576 --> 00:04:19,567 [STUDENTS CHATTERING] 39 00:04:21,314 --> 00:04:23,305 MAN [OVER SPEAKER]: Attention all students. 40 00:04:23,482 --> 00:04:26,941 There will be a mammoth protest meeting... 41 00:04:27,119 --> 00:04:30,987 ...in front of Felton Hall today at 4 p.m. 42 00:04:31,157 --> 00:04:33,216 All students are invited. 43 00:04:33,392 --> 00:04:37,522 I repeat, all students are invited. 44 00:04:37,697 --> 00:04:41,998 Volunteers, please report to protest headquarters. 45 00:04:42,168 --> 00:04:44,899 Attention all students. 46 00:04:45,071 --> 00:04:47,472 And I mean all students. 47 00:04:47,640 --> 00:04:51,577 Come to the mammoth protest meeting in front of Felton Ha"... 48 00:05:01,087 --> 00:05:04,284 Uh, excuse me. How does one go about joining the group? 49 00:05:04,790 --> 00:05:07,885 - You wanna protest? - Very much. 50 00:05:08,060 --> 00:05:09,459 What are we protesting? 51 00:05:10,396 --> 00:05:11,864 MINERVA: That. 52 00:05:12,531 --> 00:05:13,794 ILLYA: Oh, I'm with you. 53 00:05:17,636 --> 00:05:19,968 I haven't seen you before. 54 00:05:20,139 --> 00:05:21,607 I'm Minerva Dwight. 55 00:05:21,774 --> 00:05:23,538 Uh, IIIya Kuryakin. 56 00:05:23,709 --> 00:05:26,110 You new left or old left? 57 00:05:27,813 --> 00:05:30,009 Well, I favor the moderately conservative left... 58 00:05:30,182 --> 00:05:32,480 ...slightly to the right of Rasputin. 59 00:05:33,452 --> 00:05:35,477 Who decided on the demonstration? 60 00:05:35,654 --> 00:05:38,282 - That was Gregory's idea. Gregory? 61 00:05:38,457 --> 00:05:42,451 Gregory Haymish, our off-campus agitator. Every group has one, you know. 62 00:05:43,129 --> 00:05:45,291 Yes, I know. Uh, is he here? 63 00:05:45,464 --> 00:05:47,330 No, but he'll be at the demonstration. 64 00:05:47,500 --> 00:05:49,832 I see. Uh, may I? 65 00:05:59,945 --> 00:06:01,208 MINERVA: Thank you. 66 00:06:01,380 --> 00:06:02,609 Don't mention it. 67 00:06:09,155 --> 00:06:11,146 [JEERING] 68 00:06:24,770 --> 00:06:28,604 Beautiful. Beautiful. 69 00:06:37,216 --> 00:06:40,277 Greg, IIIya's just joined the group. 70 00:06:40,453 --> 00:06:44,651 HAYMISH: Welcome. Welcome to the way-outs, big daddy. 71 00:06:46,926 --> 00:06:51,796 [SHOUTS] All right, group, I wanna hear rebellion! 72 00:06:51,964 --> 00:06:53,955 [STUDENTS YELLING] 73 00:07:05,044 --> 00:07:06,273 ILLYA: What's the matter? 74 00:07:06,445 --> 00:07:08,413 I don't want Daddy to see me. 75 00:07:08,581 --> 00:07:09,810 Daddy? 76 00:07:11,350 --> 00:07:12,545 This is Dean Dwight. 77 00:07:12,985 --> 00:07:15,079 May I have your attention, please? 78 00:07:15,254 --> 00:07:17,279 Quiet, everybody. 79 00:07:18,724 --> 00:07:22,388 This demonstration is in violation of university rules. 80 00:07:22,561 --> 00:07:24,393 Please disperse immediately. 81 00:07:29,235 --> 00:07:31,226 Unless you disperse immediately... 82 00:07:31,403 --> 00:07:34,429 ...I shall order the campus police to take appropriate measures. 83 00:07:40,179 --> 00:07:41,476 This is your last chance. 84 00:07:41,647 --> 00:07:45,675 Unless you disperse immediately, you will all be arrested. 85 00:07:46,218 --> 00:07:47,686 Everybody down. 86 00:07:52,725 --> 00:07:54,454 MINERVA: Come on. What are you waiting for? 87 00:07:55,094 --> 00:07:58,189 All right, officers, do your duty. 88 00:08:03,502 --> 00:08:04,867 [STUDENTS LAUGHING] 89 00:08:10,209 --> 00:08:12,143 You're not supposed to cooperate. 90 00:08:12,311 --> 00:08:14,712 - Not even a little? - Absolutely not. 91 00:08:16,015 --> 00:08:18,416 HAYMISH: Police brutality! 92 00:08:18,584 --> 00:08:20,575 [STUDENTS JEERING] 93 00:08:30,629 --> 00:08:32,620 [GROOVY MUSIC PLAYING] 94 00:08:42,208 --> 00:08:44,870 Hi. I have an appointment with Dean Dwight. 95 00:08:45,044 --> 00:08:47,103 You'll have to wait your tum. 96 00:08:47,279 --> 00:08:48,508 SOLO: I beg your pardon. 97 00:08:48,681 --> 00:08:51,480 No offense... 98 00:08:51,650 --> 00:08:55,052 ...but I have an appointment too, and I'm next, heh. 99 00:08:55,221 --> 00:08:56,655 Right behind Mr. Trumbull. 100 00:08:57,122 --> 00:09:00,524 - Who's he? - He's the head of the board of regents. 101 00:09:00,693 --> 00:09:01,956 And he's in there right now. 102 00:09:04,863 --> 00:09:08,026 The arrests were entirely unnecessary, Dean Dwight. 103 00:09:08,200 --> 00:09:11,761 Entirely unnecessary. Think of the publicity. 104 00:09:11,937 --> 00:09:15,373 But the university rules specifically forbid such demonstrations. 105 00:09:15,541 --> 00:09:17,873 What do I care about university rules? 106 00:09:18,043 --> 00:09:20,341 Oh, the papers will have a field day on this one. 107 00:09:20,512 --> 00:09:23,277 Besides, students have been staging demonstrations all year... 108 00:09:23,449 --> 00:09:25,315 ...and you haven't had them arrested. Why now? 109 00:09:25,484 --> 00:09:28,977 I've been patient with them until now, but patience has its limits. 110 00:09:29,154 --> 00:09:30,883 Indeed it does. 111 00:09:31,056 --> 00:09:33,889 And my patience with you is fast reaching those limits. 112 00:09:35,227 --> 00:09:38,162 He actually wanted me to cut open a frog. 113 00:09:38,330 --> 00:09:40,059 Ugh! Can you imagine? 114 00:09:40,232 --> 00:09:41,461 Unbelievable. 115 00:09:41,634 --> 00:09:43,966 Well, I walked out on the course and never came back. 116 00:09:44,136 --> 00:09:45,831 And then there was French history. 117 00:09:46,005 --> 00:09:49,737 All those kings, and every one of them a Louis. 118 00:09:49,908 --> 00:09:50,898 [SOLO CHUCKLES] 119 00:09:51,076 --> 00:09:53,807 Heh, you'd have to be a census take! to keep them straight. 120 00:09:53,979 --> 00:09:56,414 So I flunked out on that course too. 121 00:09:57,049 --> 00:09:59,177 I was never very good at history myself, Miss, uh...? 122 00:09:59,718 --> 00:10:01,550 - Darling. - What? 123 00:10:01,720 --> 00:10:03,518 Uh, Patricia Darling. 124 00:10:03,689 --> 00:10:05,179 SOLO: Mm. 125 00:10:05,357 --> 00:10:07,018 How many courses are you flunking? 126 00:10:07,192 --> 00:10:09,923 FI--? Uh, well, I... 127 00:10:10,095 --> 00:10:11,563 I can't tell yet. 128 00:10:11,730 --> 00:10:12,959 TRUMBULL: Just remember. 129 00:10:13,132 --> 00:10:17,592 I hold you personally responsible for any bad publicity attached to this incident. 130 00:10:17,770 --> 00:10:19,260 SOLO: How do you do? I'm Napoleon Solo. 131 00:10:19,438 --> 00:10:21,736 I have an appointment with Dean Dwight. 132 00:10:21,907 --> 00:10:23,636 Oh, I'm Dwight. 133 00:10:23,809 --> 00:10:27,336 This is, uh, Mr. Jonathan Trumbull, chairman of our board of regents. 134 00:10:27,513 --> 00:10:29,504 - How are you? - We just did that. 135 00:10:29,682 --> 00:10:32,617 DWIGHT: Well, uh, heh... 136 00:10:32,785 --> 00:10:34,310 PATRICIA: Dean Dwight? 137 00:10:34,486 --> 00:10:36,818 Oh, not again, Patricia. 138 00:10:36,989 --> 00:10:38,423 I'm sorry, Dean Dwight. 139 00:10:38,590 --> 00:10:41,855 - What is it this time, frogs 01 Louis? - Both. 140 00:10:42,461 --> 00:10:44,395 I'll talk to you later. 141 00:10:46,865 --> 00:10:49,527 Alex Waverly called to tell me you would be arriving, Mr. Solo. 142 00:10:49,702 --> 00:10:51,329 I trust you have everything well in hand. 143 00:10:51,503 --> 00:10:53,801 Far from it, Mr. Solo. Far from it. 144 00:10:53,972 --> 00:10:57,431 I realized a demonstration at the ceremony would make security more difficult... 145 00:10:57,609 --> 00:11:00,078 ...so I decided to put a stop to all demonstrations. 146 00:11:00,245 --> 00:11:02,077 I had the main group of picketers arrested. 147 00:11:02,247 --> 00:11:05,148 Now Trumbull threatens to have me removed unless I drop the charges. 148 00:11:05,317 --> 00:11:07,308 I think we can handle the demonstrators, sir. 149 00:11:07,486 --> 00:11:10,751 A matter of principle, Mr. Solo. A matter of principle. 150 00:11:10,923 --> 00:11:12,152 I will not back down. 151 00:11:12,324 --> 00:11:14,315 [RADIO BEEPING] 152 00:11:14,927 --> 00:11:16,656 Excuse me. 153 00:11:17,629 --> 00:11:18,619 “Na? 154 00:11:18,797 --> 00:11:20,788 [GROOVY MUSIC PLAYING] 155 00:11:22,534 --> 00:11:25,162 Are we allowed to put bail on our expense accounts? 156 00:11:25,337 --> 00:11:27,305 I gather you're in durance vile. 157 00:11:27,473 --> 00:11:28,941 I am indeed. 158 00:11:29,108 --> 00:11:32,078 SOLO: You seem to have an affinity for those places. 159 00:11:32,945 --> 00:11:36,006 It was in the line of duty. Would you please come down and get me out of here? 160 00:11:36,181 --> 00:11:38,115 Me too. Me too. 161 00:11:38,283 --> 00:11:39,876 [OVER RADIO] Me tau. 162 00:11:40,052 --> 00:11:42,419 That's Minerva. What's she doing there? 163 00:11:43,055 --> 00:11:44,284 I beg your pardon. 164 00:11:45,224 --> 00:11:47,090 DWIGHT: Minerva Dwight. That's my daughter. 165 00:11:47,259 --> 00:11:48,624 She's there, isn't she? 166 00:11:49,294 --> 00:11:50,659 I'm afraid so, sir. 167 00:11:50,829 --> 00:11:54,129 We'll get you out shortly, IIIya. Meanwhile, just relax and enjoy the music. 168 00:11:54,299 --> 00:11:55,289 DWIGHT: It's too much. 169 00:11:55,467 --> 00:11:58,869 First this assassination business, and now my own daughter arrested. 170 00:11:59,037 --> 00:12:00,869 Well, I'm sorry about that, Mr. Dwight. 171 00:12:01,039 --> 00:12:05,601 It's not your fault, Mr. Solo. It's just that the year's been so had already. 172 00:12:05,778 --> 00:12:07,542 The free-speech riots last fall... 173 00:12:07,713 --> 00:12:09,738 ...the basketball scandal this spring, and now this. 174 00:12:09,915 --> 00:12:12,680 It's too much for one man. It's... 175 00:12:13,652 --> 00:12:14,983 ...just too much. 176 00:12:19,925 --> 00:12:22,189 TRUMBULL: I'm sure he's an U.N.C.L.E. agent. 177 00:12:22,361 --> 00:12:24,728 Then there are probably more. 178 00:12:24,897 --> 00:12:27,628 U.N.C.L.E. agents tend to hunt in packs. 179 00:12:27,800 --> 00:12:29,427 TRUMBULL: I say kill him. 180 00:12:29,601 --> 00:12:32,764 Well, I wasn't suggesting we give him a party, Trumbull. 181 00:12:32,938 --> 00:12:37,068 Merely that we wait until he contacts some of his associates. 182 00:12:37,242 --> 00:12:39,438 Learn to kill efficiently, Trumbull. 183 00:12:39,611 --> 00:12:42,740 You'll save yourself a great deal of time and trouble. 184 00:12:42,915 --> 00:12:46,374 I can't stand waiting. It makes me nervous. 185 00:12:46,552 --> 00:12:49,351 Everything makes you nervous, Trumbull. 186 00:12:49,521 --> 00:12:51,512 [GROOVY MUSIC PLAYING] 187 00:12:58,096 --> 00:13:02,693 It's all right, you're free to go. The charges have been dismissed. 188 00:13:03,335 --> 00:13:04,769 HAYMISH: Everybody down. 189 00:13:04,937 --> 00:13:06,166 MINERVA: IIIya. 190 00:13:08,340 --> 00:13:10,536 What are you doing? 191 00:13:10,843 --> 00:13:13,540 We can't knuckle under to the establishment now. 192 00:13:13,712 --> 00:13:15,737 We must stand our ground. 193 00:13:15,914 --> 00:13:18,713 Here we are and here we stay. 194 00:13:18,884 --> 00:13:22,115 We shall not be moved. 195 00:13:24,690 --> 00:13:26,852 GUARD: Jackson! Barnes! 196 00:13:27,326 --> 00:13:29,818 [CHEERING] 197 00:13:35,434 --> 00:13:36,731 Cossacks! 198 00:13:42,241 --> 00:13:46,041 We have called the dean's bluff and won! 199 00:13:46,211 --> 00:13:47,201 [GROOVY MUSIC PLAYING] 200 00:13:47,379 --> 00:13:50,474 Now he wouldn't dare try to stop us from putting on our demonstration... 201 00:13:50,649 --> 00:13:52,083 ...at the graduation. 202 00:13:52,251 --> 00:13:56,245 When Waverly begins his speech, we all grab our signs... 203 00:13:56,421 --> 00:13:59,550 ...and march right down to the podium! 204 00:13:59,725 --> 00:14:01,625 [ALL CHEER] 205 00:14:01,793 --> 00:14:03,887 ILLYA: Uh, do we have to march down to the podium? 206 00:14:04,062 --> 00:14:07,157 Couldn't we just, uh. hold them up at the back? 207 00:14:07,332 --> 00:14:11,599 Oh, that would be the nice, middle-class way of doing it. 208 00:14:11,770 --> 00:14:13,397 - Are we middle-class? CROWD: No! 209 00:14:13,572 --> 00:14:16,303 Then we march right down to the podium! 210 00:14:16,475 --> 00:14:18,466 CROWD: Yeah! 211 00:14:20,779 --> 00:14:22,770 Turned up anything, hmm? 212 00:14:22,948 --> 00:14:24,313 I'm not sure. 213 00:14:24,483 --> 00:14:27,919 This is our big chance... 214 00:14:28,086 --> 00:14:30,282 ...to hit the establishment where it hurts. 215 00:14:30,455 --> 00:14:31,616 So let's make the most of it. 216 00:14:31,790 --> 00:14:32,780 [TELEPHONE RINGING] 217 00:14:32,958 --> 00:14:34,357 I'll get it. 218 00:14:35,093 --> 00:14:38,154 I think this, uh, demonstration is a little too convenient. 219 00:14:38,330 --> 00:14:40,526 I smell Thrush, maybe, huh? 220 00:14:40,699 --> 00:14:42,497 ILLYA: So do I, but I don't know who. 221 00:14:43,068 --> 00:14:44,593 Uh, just a minute. 222 00:14:44,770 --> 00:14:47,102 Greg, it's for you. 223 00:14:48,373 --> 00:14:50,432 SOLO: What about him, baby? 224 00:14:51,577 --> 00:14:52,806 Hello? 225 00:14:53,478 --> 00:14:55,640 ILLYA: He's just a misguided extremist. 226 00:14:55,814 --> 00:14:59,375 Hmm. A Thrush extremist, maybe, huh? 227 00:14:59,551 --> 00:15:00,780 Maybe. 228 00:15:00,953 --> 00:15:02,546 Yes, he's here now... 229 00:15:02,721 --> 00:15:06,248 ...and he's talking to the blond-headed kid that joined the group this morning. 230 00:15:06,425 --> 00:15:10,328 Yeah. Well, I figured he was an U.N.C.L.E. agent. 231 00:15:11,029 --> 00:15:14,260 Beautiful. All right. 232 00:15:14,433 --> 00:15:15,832 You have the men there... 233 00:15:16,001 --> 00:15:19,403 ...and I'll give our two little U.N.C.L.E. mice a whiff of cheese... 234 00:15:19,571 --> 00:15:23,007 ...that will have them scurrying right into the trap. 235 00:15:29,348 --> 00:15:32,010 HAYMISH: That's all for tonight. See you tomorrow morning. 236 00:15:32,184 --> 00:15:35,484 CROWD: Good night. See you later. 237 00:15:38,023 --> 00:15:40,151 IIIya, will I see you tomorrow? 238 00:15:40,325 --> 00:15:42,157 I have a lot of work to do tomorrow. 239 00:15:42,327 --> 00:15:46,264 Dear IIIya, you're so hopelessly middle-class. 240 00:15:46,431 --> 00:15:49,560 But I like you anyway. 241 00:15:49,735 --> 00:15:51,203 Well, I'm glad. 242 00:15:51,370 --> 00:15:54,067 You know, I'm a biology major. 243 00:15:54,239 --> 00:15:56,640 I'm taking a course in eugenics. 244 00:15:56,808 --> 00:15:58,708 - Well, that's nice. - Well, don't you think... 245 00:15:58,877 --> 00:16:01,903 ...that the improvement of the human race by selective breeding is important? 246 00:16:02,080 --> 00:16:03,775 - Oh, I do, I do. - Good. 247 00:16:03,949 --> 00:16:07,112 Because I have a hunch that you and I-- - You and I what? 248 00:16:07,285 --> 00:16:10,220 Just think of the offspring we could produce. 249 00:16:10,389 --> 00:16:16,886 Why, in three or four generations, it could be a race of superman. 250 00:16:17,062 --> 00:16:18,928 Almost. 251 00:16:19,097 --> 00:16:20,587 Well, it's a thought-provoking idea... 252 00:16:20,766 --> 00:16:23,758 ...but, uh, don't you think you should finish the course first? 253 00:16:23,935 --> 00:16:25,300 What? 254 00:16:26,104 --> 00:16:29,199 Oh. Well, um... 255 00:16:29,374 --> 00:16:31,604 We'll talk about it tomorrow. 256 00:16:37,416 --> 00:16:39,407 How is it that the clouds still hang on you? 257 00:16:39,584 --> 00:16:42,349 Hmm? Oh. 258 00:16:42,521 --> 00:16:45,115 You asked me this morning... 259 00:16:45,290 --> 00:16:48,123 ...if I remembered any members of the group acting strangely. 260 00:16:48,293 --> 00:16:50,057 SOLO: Mm-hm. And have you? 261 00:16:50,228 --> 00:16:54,256 Yeah, well, I seem to recall a guy named Tony Wills... 262 00:16:54,433 --> 00:16:58,495 ...talking to a couple of very strange cats. 263 00:16:58,670 --> 00:17:00,536 How strange? 264 00:17:00,706 --> 00:17:04,802 The double-breasted types with bulges right here. 265 00:17:05,610 --> 00:17:08,170 If you wanted to find Tony... 266 00:17:08,947 --> 00:17:11,279 ...if you cut straight across the quad... 267 00:17:11,450 --> 00:17:14,385 ...right in front of the girls' dorm, you'll find the student union. 268 00:17:14,553 --> 00:17:16,544 - He'll be there. - Yeah. 269 00:17:16,722 --> 00:17:18,247 Thank you. 270 00:17:18,857 --> 00:17:20,621 Don't mention it. 271 00:17:42,848 --> 00:17:44,111 [GRUNTING] 272 00:17:53,658 --> 00:17:55,990 - In there. - That's the girls' dorm. 273 00:17:56,161 --> 00:17:57,993 SOLO: Is that bad? 274 00:18:09,841 --> 00:18:12,811 J.D.'s from one of those fraternities again. 275 00:18:12,978 --> 00:18:15,072 That's the third time this week. 276 00:18:15,514 --> 00:18:17,380 They're such ju-- 277 00:18:29,861 --> 00:18:31,920 SOLO: Oh, sorry. 278 00:18:38,069 --> 00:18:40,003 When I was in college, they used to scream. 279 00:18:40,172 --> 00:18:41,230 Come on. 280 00:18:52,551 --> 00:18:53,950 Juveniles. 281 00:18:54,119 --> 00:18:57,145 ILLYA: Where's the fire door? PATRICIA: Over there. 282 00:18:57,322 --> 00:18:58,653 MINERVA: Get the kids. 283 00:18:58,824 --> 00:19:00,451 [GRUNTING] 284 00:19:02,460 --> 00:19:03,723 PATRICIA: Pillow fight! 285 00:19:03,895 --> 00:19:05,124 GIRL: Pillow fight! 286 00:19:06,097 --> 00:19:07,531 [GIGGLING] 287 00:19:09,835 --> 00:19:11,200 [SHRIEKING] 288 00:19:30,922 --> 00:19:32,287 GIRL: Get him! 289 00:19:56,581 --> 00:19:58,777 And I thought you were middle-class. 290 00:19:58,950 --> 00:20:02,909 Well, appearances can be deceptive. 291 00:20:03,088 --> 00:20:06,752 But you must take better care of yourself, for the sake of our future children. 292 00:20:07,225 --> 00:20:09,626 - Our superman? - Mm-hm. 293 00:20:09,794 --> 00:20:13,059 Would you rather have super-boys or super-girls? 294 00:20:14,232 --> 00:20:17,224 Hey, you know, that's the first time I've gotten any use out of these books. 295 00:20:17,402 --> 00:20:18,392 [GIGGLES] 296 00:20:18,570 --> 00:20:21,835 Well, I don't know about your professors, but I'd be delighted to give you an A. 297 00:20:22,007 --> 00:20:23,270 In what subject? 298 00:20:24,209 --> 00:20:25,438 Well,uh... 299 00:20:25,610 --> 00:20:27,977 Why don't you try ancient history, Mr. Solo? 300 00:20:30,048 --> 00:20:32,574 It's what you're about to become. 301 00:20:33,985 --> 00:20:36,955 Excellent timing, gentlemen. Thank you. 302 00:20:37,122 --> 00:20:39,113 Don't celebrate yet, Solo. 303 00:20:39,291 --> 00:20:41,316 There's plenty more where I came from. 304 00:20:44,963 --> 00:20:46,727 I told you. 305 00:20:47,399 --> 00:20:50,027 We should've killed him right away. 306 00:20:50,201 --> 00:20:52,761 Now our whole plan is knocked into a cocked hat. 307 00:20:52,938 --> 00:20:54,702 I don't see that. 308 00:20:54,873 --> 00:20:58,207 With Haymish in jail, we can't assassinate Waverly. 309 00:20:58,376 --> 00:21:01,311 “Can't“ is a big word, my good friend. 310 00:21:01,479 --> 00:21:04,471 TRUMBULL: Of course, we could just shoot him down. 311 00:21:04,649 --> 00:21:06,583 But the idea behind the whole plan... 312 00:21:06,751 --> 00:21:08,981 ...was to blame the killing on the student demonstrators. 313 00:21:09,154 --> 00:21:11,714 There are other ways to kill Waverly... 314 00:21:11,890 --> 00:21:13,858 ...and other people to put the blame on... 315 00:21:14,025 --> 00:21:16,153 ...so I arranged an alternate method. 316 00:21:16,728 --> 00:21:18,162 Dwight will kill Waverly. 317 00:21:19,764 --> 00:21:23,166 - Who? - Dean Timothy Dwight. 318 00:21:23,335 --> 00:21:27,329 You must admit, it's a rather provocative idea. 319 00:21:28,039 --> 00:21:31,236 We haven't been able to find out who's behind it, but we did get the hatchet men. 320 00:21:31,409 --> 00:21:36,279 Mr. Solo, Thrush has enough hatchet men to take on the United States Marines. 321 00:21:36,448 --> 00:21:38,348 At least they can't follow their original plan... 322 00:21:38,516 --> 00:21:41,281 ...which was to use a student demonstration as a smoke screen. 323 00:21:41,453 --> 00:21:44,889 One of their men was to have led the demonstration and presumably kill you. 324 00:21:45,056 --> 00:21:48,082 WAVERLY: They have as many plans as they have hatchet men. 325 00:21:48,259 --> 00:21:50,853 They're undoubtedly hatching out a new one right now. 326 00:21:51,029 --> 00:21:53,293 Alexander, this has gone too far. 327 00:21:53,465 --> 00:21:56,025 The press is having a field day. Have you seen the headlines? 328 00:21:56,201 --> 00:21:58,431 I'm sorry, Timothy. 329 00:21:58,603 --> 00:22:01,698 I don't mean to cause you embarrassment. What are the headlines? 330 00:22:01,873 --> 00:22:05,138 Something about a brawl in a girls' dormitory. 331 00:22:05,310 --> 00:22:06,778 Oh. 332 00:22:06,945 --> 00:22:11,815 Well, with Mr. Solo involved, I might've known. 333 00:22:12,617 --> 00:22:15,450 Try and be a bit more discreet in future, Mr. Solo. 334 00:22:15,620 --> 00:22:16,610 Yes, sir. 335 00:22:16,788 --> 00:22:18,847 And please, gentlemen, leave my daughter out of this. 336 00:22:19,024 --> 00:22:22,255 Since you've arrived, Minerva's been in jail, she's been in a brawl. 337 00:22:22,427 --> 00:22:24,486 Jonathan Trumbull has threatened to have me fired. 338 00:22:24,662 --> 00:22:26,130 The students are getting out of hand. 339 00:22:26,297 --> 00:22:28,823 And I think I am on the nerve of a vergous breakdown. 340 00:22:29,734 --> 00:22:31,498 Must you keep that vaporizer on? 341 00:22:31,669 --> 00:22:34,661 You can smell the fumes all through the building. 342 00:22:34,839 --> 00:22:36,671 THRUSH AGENT: It's my sinuses, Trumbull. 343 00:22:36,841 --> 00:22:39,902 Perhaps this makeup aggravates the condition. 344 00:22:40,078 --> 00:22:43,104 I'm going down to check on preparations for the graduation ceremony. 345 00:22:43,281 --> 00:22:45,773 I wouldn't wander around if I were you. 346 00:22:45,950 --> 00:22:48,180 THRUSH AGENT [AS DWIGHT]: Don't worry about me. 347 00:22:49,687 --> 00:22:51,121 A remarkable job. 348 00:22:51,656 --> 00:22:53,590 Truly remarkable. 349 00:22:54,125 --> 00:22:56,457 THRUSH AGENT: You've been in the sticks too long, Trumbull. 350 00:22:56,628 --> 00:22:59,654 You've forgotten how we do things in the big city. 351 00:23:06,104 --> 00:23:08,095 [FOOTSTEPS] 352 00:23:10,508 --> 00:23:13,205 SOLO: Dwight was not exactly brimming over with goodwill. 353 00:23:13,378 --> 00:23:14,607 Would you be? 354 00:23:14,779 --> 00:23:17,840 He might be a little more cooperative, it he's on the level. 355 00:23:18,016 --> 00:23:20,314 - You think he isn't? - Consider the facts now. 356 00:23:20,485 --> 00:23:24,888 Thrush knew we'd be here, and Dwight was the only one who was told about it. 357 00:23:25,056 --> 00:23:27,457 Ah, Mr. Solo. 358 00:23:27,625 --> 00:23:30,151 What do you think of our little campus? 359 00:23:30,328 --> 00:23:35,823 Well, it's, uh, not exactly a bucolic atmosphere. 360 00:23:42,207 --> 00:23:43,902 Jonathan? 361 00:23:46,711 --> 00:23:48,736 Jonathan? 362 00:23:50,381 --> 00:23:52,247 Jonathan? 363 00:23:53,017 --> 00:23:54,143 [THRUSH AGENT SNIFFING] 364 00:24:18,209 --> 00:24:19,540 Timothy, what's wrong? 365 00:24:20,145 --> 00:24:22,443 It's happened. I've cracked up. 366 00:24:22,614 --> 00:24:25,584 You have? You look all right to me. 367 00:24:25,750 --> 00:24:27,809 I just saw myself, Jonathan. 368 00:24:27,986 --> 00:24:31,388 I just looked into my own face. It was incredible. 369 00:24:31,556 --> 00:24:33,217 What's wrong with it? 370 00:24:33,391 --> 00:24:35,917 You have a perfectly acceptable face. 371 00:24:36,094 --> 00:24:38,256 Some people might even consider it handsome. 372 00:24:38,429 --> 00:24:41,660 Yes, but it was on somebody else. 373 00:24:41,833 --> 00:24:43,301 - Your face? - Yes. 374 00:24:43,468 --> 00:24:46,403 I opened that door and there it was, my own face. 375 00:24:46,571 --> 00:24:48,869 Through a cloud of swirling mist. 376 00:24:49,040 --> 00:24:51,839 - Swirling mist? - Yes. 377 00:24:52,010 --> 00:24:56,038 I just saw myself in that room not 30 seconds ago. 378 00:25:06,958 --> 00:25:10,019 - Inside this room? - It's empty. 379 00:25:10,461 --> 00:25:12,088 TRUMBULL: Naturally. 380 00:25:13,965 --> 00:25:15,524 But what's that medicinal smell? 381 00:25:15,700 --> 00:25:16,861 Smell? 382 00:25:17,035 --> 00:25:18,230 [TRUMBULL SNIFFS] 383 00:25:18,403 --> 00:25:20,030 What smell? 384 00:25:21,172 --> 00:25:24,107 First I see things, now I smell things. 385 00:25:25,343 --> 00:25:28,005 Jonathan, I've finally gone over the edge. 386 00:25:28,179 --> 00:25:30,546 TRUMBULL: I wouldn't worry about it, Timothy. 387 00:25:30,715 --> 00:25:34,117 It's been a difficult year, and you're a little upset. 388 00:25:34,285 --> 00:25:36,049 A good night's sleep, and you'll feel fine. 389 00:25:36,221 --> 00:25:39,191 Sleep. I wouldn't dare close my eyes. 390 00:25:39,357 --> 00:25:41,621 I'd see that thing again, that face, my face. 391 00:25:41,793 --> 00:25:44,558 Now, don't panic. That's the worst thing you could do. 392 00:25:44,729 --> 00:25:47,596 I am not panicking. 393 00:25:47,765 --> 00:25:48,994 I'm resigning. 394 00:25:49,167 --> 00:25:52,330 Oh, you can't resign. Not until after the graduation anyway. 395 00:25:52,503 --> 00:25:55,700 Oh, yes, I'll resign before the graduation, otherwise, I'd crack up. 396 00:25:55,873 --> 00:25:59,138 Why? It's just an ordinary graduation. 397 00:25:59,310 --> 00:26:01,074 It isn't ordinary, Jonathan. 398 00:26:01,246 --> 00:26:03,840 Believe me. There are certain things I can't tell you... 399 00:26:04,015 --> 00:26:06,245 ...but the strain would be terrible. 400 00:26:06,417 --> 00:26:10,320 And obviously, I'm in no condition to undergo even a small strain at this point. 401 00:26:12,824 --> 00:26:15,850 Do me one little favor, Timothy. 402 00:26:16,027 --> 00:26:17,961 Before you resign... 403 00:26:18,129 --> 00:26:21,099 ...talk to your old friend in the Psychology Department. 404 00:26:21,266 --> 00:26:22,859 What's his name? 405 00:26:23,401 --> 00:26:25,165 DWIGHT: Dr. Neary? 406 00:26:25,637 --> 00:26:27,469 Dr. Neary. 407 00:26:28,640 --> 00:26:30,165 All right. 408 00:26:32,577 --> 00:26:34,238 But I warn you... 409 00:26:34,412 --> 00:26:37,871 ...I fully intend to resign before the day is out. 410 00:26:39,651 --> 00:26:41,551 Get me Dr. Neary. 411 00:26:48,192 --> 00:26:49,626 [CLEARS THROAT] 412 00:26:54,666 --> 00:26:59,126 If he resigns publicly before the graduation, our plan is useless. 413 00:26:59,304 --> 00:27:00,533 Don't worry. 414 00:27:00,705 --> 00:27:03,367 He'll be out of circulation very soon. 415 00:27:03,541 --> 00:27:07,500 You'll just have to take his place a little earlier than we planned, that's all. 416 00:27:09,414 --> 00:27:12,440 Dr. Neary, Jonathan Trumbull here. 417 00:27:12,617 --> 00:27:15,109 Dean Dwight is on his way over to see you. 418 00:27:15,286 --> 00:27:17,846 NEARY: He is? Good. 419 00:27:18,022 --> 00:27:20,320 I haven't seen him since this morning. 420 00:27:20,491 --> 00:27:22,926 He's a sick man, Neary. 421 00:27:23,094 --> 00:27:25,791 I want you to keep him at your place until you hear from me again. 422 00:27:25,963 --> 00:27:28,898 Sick? Timothy? 423 00:27:29,067 --> 00:27:31,934 Why, he was fine when I saw him this morning. 424 00:27:32,103 --> 00:27:36,836 If I say he's sick, Neary, he is sick. 425 00:27:37,508 --> 00:27:39,602 Of course, he is sick. 426 00:27:39,777 --> 00:27:41,302 Shall I call a doctor? 427 00:27:41,479 --> 00:27:44,176 Oh, no. Just make sure he doesn't get away. 428 00:27:44,816 --> 00:27:49,049 But, uh, if he is sick, Mr. Trumbull, and of course he is... 429 00:27:49,220 --> 00:27:50,949 ...shouldn't he be treated? 430 00:27:52,824 --> 00:27:56,260 The regents elect the new chairman of the Psychology Department... 431 00:27:56,427 --> 00:27:58,657 ...next month, Neary. 432 00:27:58,830 --> 00:28:01,959 I had intended to recommend you for the job. 433 00:28:02,900 --> 00:28:05,665 Uh, but detaining Dean Dwight without his consent... 434 00:28:05,837 --> 00:28:08,067 ...it would be unethical. 435 00:28:08,239 --> 00:28:13,234 And I had not intended to mention that little indiscretion of yours... 436 00:28:13,411 --> 00:28:15,903 ...with that blend graduate student. 437 00:28:17,181 --> 00:28:20,242 Um, I suppose I could keep him here for a while. 438 00:28:20,418 --> 00:28:23,251 Considering it's for his own good. 439 00:28:23,421 --> 00:28:26,755 His and yours, doctor. Good day. 440 00:28:31,629 --> 00:28:33,723 Take care of him later. 441 00:28:33,898 --> 00:28:37,357 Meanwhile, to all intents and purposes, I am Dwight. 442 00:28:37,535 --> 00:28:39,765 I don't like replacing him this soon. 443 00:28:39,937 --> 00:28:41,769 I'll have to face that daughter of his. 444 00:28:41,939 --> 00:28:44,567 Either you replace him or he resigns. 445 00:28:45,877 --> 00:28:47,106 All right. 446 00:28:47,278 --> 00:28:50,805 You keep Dwight under wraps. I'll take care of the brat. 447 00:28:52,884 --> 00:28:54,443 What about the U.N.C.L.E. agents? 448 00:28:55,686 --> 00:28:59,213 We'll find something interesting for them too. 449 00:29:05,229 --> 00:29:08,722 I still don't think you should come here, sir. You could give any number of excuses. 450 00:29:08,900 --> 00:29:12,234 Absolutely not, Mr. Solo. I'll be there. 451 00:29:12,403 --> 00:29:14,872 And it's your job to see that I leave there alive. 452 00:29:15,039 --> 00:29:16,029 Yes, sir. 453 00:29:16,207 --> 00:29:18,335 WAVERLY: And as far as Dean Dwight is concerned... 454 00:29:18,509 --> 00:29:21,410 - I can assure you, he's beyond suspicion. - But it is possible... 455 00:29:21,579 --> 00:29:24,378 ...that he might've told someone about our being here, inadvertently. 456 00:29:24,549 --> 00:29:27,416 Yes, it's possible. Why don't you ask him? 457 00:29:27,585 --> 00:29:30,577 Yes, sir. That's exactly what we're planning to do. 458 00:29:32,723 --> 00:29:35,090 My own face. It was terrible. 459 00:29:35,259 --> 00:29:38,388 - I can well imagine. - And I smell things too. 460 00:29:38,563 --> 00:29:41,692 These are not good signs, Timothy. Not good at all. 461 00:29:41,866 --> 00:29:44,597 Silas, do you think I've gone over the edge? 462 00:29:44,769 --> 00:29:46,737 I wouldn't say that. 463 00:29:48,105 --> 00:29:51,097 But I think we should have a talk about your problems. 464 00:29:51,275 --> 00:29:54,176 Along talk, and right now... 465 00:29:54,345 --> 00:29:56,074 ...before your condition worsens. 466 00:29:56,247 --> 00:29:58,238 Right now, I'm going to announce my resignation. 467 00:29:58,850 --> 00:30:01,820 - I think we should talk, Timothy. - What's there to talk about? 468 00:30:01,986 --> 00:30:05,445 I will resign and I'll have myself committed voluntarily. 469 00:30:06,023 --> 00:30:08,549 Your symptoms are not that serious. 470 00:30:08,726 --> 00:30:11,752 A frank discussion might relieve the anxieties... 471 00:30:11,929 --> 00:30:14,762 ...that are causing these symptoms. 472 00:30:14,932 --> 00:30:17,958 Otherwise, you may end up like Nelson. 473 00:30:18,135 --> 00:30:19,830 He started out just like you. 474 00:30:21,172 --> 00:30:25,837 He is now in the incurable ward at the state hospital. 475 00:30:27,278 --> 00:30:29,337 They call him “the vegetable.“ 476 00:30:35,520 --> 00:30:38,080 Let's talk. Wait. 477 00:30:39,323 --> 00:30:41,621 I better call my daughter first. 478 00:30:47,198 --> 00:30:48,791 Tell her I'll be late for dinner. 479 00:30:48,966 --> 00:30:50,957 [TELEPHONE RINGS] 480 00:30:52,637 --> 00:30:55,334 - Hello? - Who is this? 481 00:30:55,506 --> 00:30:59,238 This is Timothy Dwight. Who am I speaking to, please? 482 00:31:01,078 --> 00:31:02,341 What's wrong? 483 00:31:02,747 --> 00:31:04,613 It's getting worse. 484 00:31:05,449 --> 00:31:08,384 I just talked to myself on the telephone. 485 00:31:09,253 --> 00:31:12,018 Um, sit down, Timothy. 486 00:31:13,691 --> 00:31:15,989 Can I get you an aspirin? 487 00:31:27,405 --> 00:31:31,239 I don't like it, Trumbull. I don't like it at all. 488 00:31:31,409 --> 00:31:32,774 Just for one night. 489 00:31:32,944 --> 00:31:35,845 We can't very well get rid of everyone who knows Dwight. 490 00:31:36,013 --> 00:31:39,972 No, I suppose not. Though it is a nice idea. 491 00:31:40,151 --> 00:31:42,142 [KNOCKING ON DOOR] 492 00:31:42,920 --> 00:31:44,684 Come in. 493 00:31:46,190 --> 00:31:48,591 Ah, Mr. Kuryakin and Mr. Solo. 494 00:31:48,759 --> 00:31:50,989 How nice to see you. 495 00:31:52,263 --> 00:31:54,459 - I hope you gentlemen stay for dinner. - No, thank you. 496 00:31:54,632 --> 00:31:57,499 We have to get back to the campus to make preparations for tomorrow. 497 00:31:57,668 --> 00:32:01,229 We wanted to ask you if you might have mentioned our presence here to anyone. 498 00:32:01,872 --> 00:32:03,897 You asked me to keep it to myself, didn't you? 499 00:32:04,075 --> 00:32:07,807 Well, of course, but you might've mentioned something without realizing it. 500 00:32:07,979 --> 00:32:10,277 You're speaking to the dean of this university, Mr. Solo... 501 00:32:10,448 --> 00:32:12,917 ...not to one of its crackbrained coeds. 502 00:32:13,884 --> 00:32:14,976 Forgive us. 503 00:32:15,152 --> 00:32:16,142 [DOOR OPENS THEN CLOSES] 504 00:32:17,455 --> 00:32:18,752 MINERVA: IIIya. 505 00:32:18,923 --> 00:32:20,550 THRUSH AGENT [AS DWIGHT]: Oh, hello, dear. 506 00:32:20,725 --> 00:32:21,886 MINERVA: Hello, Daddy. 507 00:32:22,059 --> 00:32:23,424 How were classes? 508 00:32:23,594 --> 00:32:25,926 Daddy, I didn't have any classes today. 509 00:32:26,097 --> 00:32:27,622 Now, you know that. 510 00:32:27,798 --> 00:32:29,027 Oh, ha, of course. 511 00:32:29,200 --> 00:32:32,932 Sometimes I feel more like a dean than a daddy. It's an occupational hazard. 512 00:32:33,104 --> 00:32:38,133 Don't worry about that, because you are doing just fine in the daddy department. 513 00:32:38,309 --> 00:32:40,073 Thank you, dear. 514 00:32:40,244 --> 00:32:42,804 You know Mr. Solo? My daughter, Minerva. 515 00:32:42,980 --> 00:32:46,245 - Minerva, how are you? - Hello, Mr. Solo. 516 00:32:47,251 --> 00:32:48,776 “Na. what ate you doing have? 517 00:32:49,320 --> 00:32:51,084 Oh. Oh, I know. 518 00:32:54,525 --> 00:32:58,223 It has something to do with that business in the dorm, doesn't it? 519 00:32:59,764 --> 00:33:01,425 Something like that. 520 00:33:02,099 --> 00:33:04,830 Uh, I'm sure everything will work out. 521 00:33:05,002 --> 00:33:06,868 I hope so. Good day. 522 00:33:07,038 --> 00:33:10,099 - Good day. - I'll walk you to the car. 523 00:33:22,086 --> 00:33:23,315 I'm worried about Daddy. 524 00:33:23,487 --> 00:33:24,716 SOLO: Why? 525 00:33:24,889 --> 00:33:27,483 MINERVA: Uh, nothing specific. 526 00:33:31,562 --> 00:33:34,293 Well, it's just that he's been acting peculiar. 527 00:33:34,465 --> 00:33:35,694 ILLYA: How peculiar? 528 00:33:35,866 --> 00:33:37,630 Very. 529 00:33:38,536 --> 00:33:41,403 Is there anyone else on campus that knows your father well? 530 00:33:42,373 --> 00:33:44,535 His oldest friend is Silas Neary. 531 00:33:44,709 --> 00:33:46,507 He's a psychology professor. 532 00:33:48,879 --> 00:33:50,506 Bye, IIIya. 533 00:33:51,382 --> 00:33:52,781 Bye. 534 00:33:55,419 --> 00:33:57,820 She's suspicious. So are they. 535 00:33:57,988 --> 00:34:00,013 If we give them enough time... 536 00:34:02,326 --> 00:34:04,658 THRUSH AGENT: Their time's already run out. 537 00:34:06,731 --> 00:34:08,358 My dear. 538 00:34:10,468 --> 00:34:11,799 I think the moment has arrived... 539 00:34:11,969 --> 00:34:15,462 ...for you and Daddy to have a little talk about the facts of life. 540 00:34:17,508 --> 00:34:19,101 How'd he seem to you? 541 00:34:19,276 --> 00:34:21,973 Like an absent-minded dean. 542 00:34:22,446 --> 00:34:25,711 Mr. Waverly says he's all right, he's probably all right. 543 00:34:25,883 --> 00:34:29,319 Wouldn't do any harm to talk to his friend Dr. Neary. 544 00:34:31,455 --> 00:34:34,117 DWIGHT: All that year, I was terribly frustrated. 545 00:34:34,291 --> 00:34:35,588 Pressures, anxieties, you know. 546 00:34:35,760 --> 00:34:39,060 And then the next year, when I entered seventh grade, it was even worse. 547 00:34:39,230 --> 00:34:41,164 My father wanted me to make good marks... 548 00:34:41,332 --> 00:34:43,630 ...and my mother wanted me to go out for the baseball team. 549 00:34:44,502 --> 00:34:46,493 I suppose it was just a typical problem, but-- 550 00:34:46,670 --> 00:34:47,660 [KNOCKING ON DOOR] 551 00:34:55,980 --> 00:34:57,573 - Dr. Neary? NEARY: Yes. 552 00:34:57,748 --> 00:34:59,580 We'd like to talk to you about Dean Dwight. 553 00:35:05,856 --> 00:35:07,381 When did you get here? 554 00:35:07,558 --> 00:35:09,959 Oh, uh, along time ago. 555 00:35:10,127 --> 00:35:14,963 I've been talking to Dr. Neary about myself and I, uh... 556 00:35:15,132 --> 00:35:16,793 I'm up to the seventh grade already. 557 00:35:39,156 --> 00:35:41,147 So we meet at last, Dean Dwight... 558 00:35:41,926 --> 00:35:43,519 ...face-to-face. 559 00:35:44,094 --> 00:35:48,292 Please, Mr. Solo, no fireworks. There are ladies in the audience. 560 00:35:48,465 --> 00:35:50,092 Daddy. 561 00:35:52,002 --> 00:35:54,972 Touching. Very touching. 562 00:35:55,139 --> 00:35:58,109 I take pleasure in such happy reunions. 563 00:35:58,275 --> 00:36:00,937 Let's skip the flourishes and get rid of them. 564 00:36:01,111 --> 00:36:03,671 We have a lot of arrangements to make before tomorrow morning. 565 00:36:03,848 --> 00:36:08,843 Spoken like a true Philistine, Trumbull. You have no appreciation of the an. 566 00:36:09,019 --> 00:36:11,454 My business killings are always quick and clean... 567 00:36:11,622 --> 00:36:14,717 ...but this is a pleasure killing, so I don't mind dawdling a little. 568 00:36:16,794 --> 00:36:20,230 After all, man has to have some relaxation. 569 00:36:28,839 --> 00:36:31,274 THRUSH AGENT: Interesting, these communicators. 570 00:36:31,442 --> 00:36:35,208 I think, though, it'd be inadvisable to let you keep them. 571 00:36:36,046 --> 00:36:39,038 Uh, you'll find the chairs are bolted to the floor. 572 00:36:39,216 --> 00:36:41,878 Now, class, you're ready for your final exam... 573 00:36:42,052 --> 00:36:44,987 ...to be administered by this electronic teaching machine... 574 00:36:45,155 --> 00:36:48,648 ...which is reputed to work wonders with slow learners. 575 00:36:48,826 --> 00:36:52,387 A recorded voice will ask you a question and give you two possible answers. 576 00:36:52,563 --> 00:36:56,898 If you choose the correct answer by pressing the appropriate button, Mr. Solo... 577 00:36:57,067 --> 00:36:58,398 ...a bell will ring. 578 00:36:58,569 --> 00:37:00,663 This will be followed by the next question. 579 00:37:01,138 --> 00:37:02,469 If you choose the wrong answer... 580 00:37:02,640 --> 00:37:05,974 ...or fail to answer within the 15-second time limit... 581 00:37:06,143 --> 00:37:07,406 ...a buzzer will sound. 582 00:37:07,578 --> 00:37:10,604 This buzzer is connected to a cylinder of poison gas. 583 00:37:11,215 --> 00:37:14,344 When the buzzer sounds, the gas is released. 584 00:37:14,852 --> 00:37:18,413 So you see, my friends, your first mistake will also be your last. 585 00:37:18,589 --> 00:37:21,581 To insure your privacy, we've sealed off all the ventilators. 586 00:37:21,759 --> 00:37:26,253 And there will be no proctors. We operate here on the honor system. 587 00:37:29,867 --> 00:37:31,460 Seal it. 588 00:37:40,945 --> 00:37:44,472 MAN [ON RECORDING]: Question one. European history. 589 00:37:44,648 --> 00:37:48,414 In what year did Napoleon Bonaparte die? 590 00:37:48,585 --> 00:37:52,317 Answer A: 1823. 591 00:37:52,489 --> 00:37:56,483 Answer 3: 7827. 592 00:37:56,660 --> 00:37:58,560 [TICKING] 593 00:37:58,729 --> 00:38:00,322 Come on, Napoleon, you should know that. 594 00:38:00,497 --> 00:38:03,956 I was named after him. I wasn't at his funeral. 595 00:38:04,902 --> 00:38:07,462 I flunked history the same year I flunked Latin. 596 00:38:07,638 --> 00:38:10,403 - Dr. Neary? - I'm afraid it's not my field, Mr. Solo. 597 00:38:10,574 --> 00:38:12,804 I think it's 1823, but I'm not sure. 598 00:38:12,977 --> 00:38:15,002 Well, let's not die by default. 599 00:38:16,480 --> 00:38:17,845 [RINGING] 600 00:38:18,916 --> 00:38:20,611 [ALL SIGH] 601 00:38:34,698 --> 00:38:38,692 MAN [ON RECORDING]: Question 309- Nature! science- 602 00:38:38,869 --> 00:38:42,828 The horseshoe crab belongs to which genus? 603 00:38:43,007 --> 00:38:46,204 Answer A: Genus Armonidae. 604 00:38:46,377 --> 00:38:49,210 Answer 3: Genus Rhexiflia. 605 00:38:49,380 --> 00:38:51,439 - Armonidae. - Rhexillia. 606 00:38:51,615 --> 00:38:53,606 [CLOCK TICKING] 607 00:39:00,190 --> 00:39:02,682 [BELL RINGING] 608 00:39:10,868 --> 00:39:12,836 THRUSH AGENT [AS DWIGHT]: Alex. 609 00:39:13,704 --> 00:39:16,105 WAVERLY: Ah, Timothy. THRUSH AGENT: It's been too long. 610 00:39:16,306 --> 00:39:18,673 This is Jonathan Trumbull, chairman of our board of regents. 611 00:39:18,842 --> 00:39:21,311 WAVERLY: Mr. Trumbull. THRUSH AGENT: Alex Waverly. 612 00:39:21,478 --> 00:39:23,879 Well, Timothy. you're looking well, I must say. 613 00:39:24,048 --> 00:39:26,107 THRUSH AGENT: I'm looking forward to the next hour... 614 00:39:26,283 --> 00:39:29,309 ...more than I can tell you, Alex. WAVERLY: Uh, Mr. Solo and Mr. Kuryakin... 615 00:39:29,486 --> 00:39:30,544 ...aren't they here? 616 00:39:30,721 --> 00:39:32,519 Why, no, I haven't seen them since last night. 617 00:39:32,689 --> 00:39:33,679 WAVERLY: That's curious. 618 00:39:33,857 --> 00:39:35,757 THRUSH AGENT: Everything's in order, my friend. 619 00:39:35,926 --> 00:39:38,759 Indeed, everything's just fine. 620 00:39:48,439 --> 00:39:50,908 Oh, I don't know, gentlemen. 621 00:39:51,075 --> 00:39:54,807 I don't think the younger generation is completely hopeless. 622 00:39:54,978 --> 00:39:57,845 Difficult perhaps, but not hopeless. 623 00:39:58,015 --> 00:40:00,006 You could kill him now just as easily. 624 00:40:00,184 --> 00:40:05,748 No, I want to wait until they're all seated and he's in the middle of his speech. 625 00:40:05,923 --> 00:40:10,053 I want it to be absolutely clear he's been killed by Dean Timothy Dwight. 626 00:40:10,227 --> 00:40:13,925 Killed in front of the entire graduating class. 627 00:40:14,098 --> 00:40:16,362 Consider what'll happen, Trumbull. 628 00:40:16,533 --> 00:40:20,401 The groves of academe will be shaken to the very roots. 629 00:40:20,571 --> 00:40:23,302 The scandal will lead to so many investigations... 630 00:40:23,474 --> 00:40:25,306 ...U.N.C.L.E. will be finished. 631 00:40:25,476 --> 00:40:29,413 Absolutely finished as a secret agency. 632 00:40:29,580 --> 00:40:32,447 And Thrush will move into the vacuum. 633 00:40:32,616 --> 00:40:35,051 TRUMBULL: Excuse me. This way, gentlemen, please. 634 00:40:41,525 --> 00:40:43,892 Open Channel D, please. 635 00:40:46,296 --> 00:40:48,025 Mr. Solo? 636 00:40:48,765 --> 00:40:50,597 Mr. Kuryakin? 637 00:40:51,401 --> 00:40:53,460 Either of you, come in, please. 638 00:40:54,004 --> 00:40:58,669 MAN [ON RECORDING]: Question 336. Biochemistry. 639 00:40:58,842 --> 00:41:00,867 TRUMBULL: We're ready, Mr. Waverly. 640 00:41:01,378 --> 00:41:03,437 Oh, coming, coming. 641 00:41:06,683 --> 00:41:10,620 TRUMBULL: Alexander Waverly hardly needs an introduction. 642 00:41:10,787 --> 00:41:14,155 His reputation is well-known by all of you. 643 00:41:14,324 --> 00:41:19,091 And on this day, when you are about to leave the cloistered halls of ivy... 644 00:41:19,530 --> 00:41:22,090 ...no man is more qualified... 645 00:41:22,266 --> 00:41:26,362 ...to give you a few words of wise advice... 646 00:41:26,537 --> 00:41:28,096 ...as you are about to... 647 00:41:28,272 --> 00:41:30,536 MAN [ON RECORDING]: The star Alpha 17... 648 00:41:30,707 --> 00:41:33,369 ...is haw many light years from the sun? 649 00:41:33,544 --> 00:41:37,037 Answer A: 416. 650 00:41:37,214 --> 00:41:40,343 Answer B: 394. 651 00:41:40,517 --> 00:41:41,507 [DWIGHT SNORING] 652 00:41:41,685 --> 00:41:43,016 Daddy. 653 00:41:43,187 --> 00:41:44,484 [TICKING] 654 00:41:44,655 --> 00:41:45,884 Daddy, wake up. 655 00:41:46,056 --> 00:41:47,717 DWIGHT: It's 394. 656 00:41:47,891 --> 00:41:49,689 NEARY: Four sixteen. 657 00:41:49,860 --> 00:41:52,158 DWIGHT: Three ninety-four, I tell you. 658 00:41:52,329 --> 00:41:54,491 ILLYA: Push the button. SOLO: Which one? 659 00:41:55,966 --> 00:41:57,161 [RINGING] 660 00:42:00,337 --> 00:42:02,499 TRUMBULL: But before you hear Mr. Waverly... 661 00:42:02,673 --> 00:42:05,233 ...I would be derelict in my duty... 662 00:42:05,409 --> 00:42:09,846 ...if I did not give you a few words of parting advice of my own. 663 00:42:10,013 --> 00:42:12,482 MAN [ON RECORDING]: Geography. Mt. Whitney... 664 00:42:12,649 --> 00:42:16,313 ILLYA: Napoleon, that's closed-circuit television. 665 00:42:16,820 --> 00:42:20,950 MAN“. Answer A: 14,495. 666 00:42:21,124 --> 00:42:23,388 Answer 3: 74. 667 00:42:23,560 --> 00:42:25,028 TRUMBULL: I can only say... 668 00:42:25,195 --> 00:42:27,527 ...we of the older generation... 669 00:42:27,698 --> 00:42:33,262 ...look to you for new solutions to our old problems. 670 00:42:34,037 --> 00:42:35,471 [SIGHS] 671 00:42:39,476 --> 00:42:40,807 [ILLYA GRUNTS] 672 00:42:41,678 --> 00:42:43,271 ILLYA: Four ninety-five. 673 00:42:43,447 --> 00:42:45,006 How do you know? 674 00:42:46,683 --> 00:42:48,742 ILLYA: I climbed it. 675 00:42:50,854 --> 00:42:51,844 [BELL RINGS] 676 00:42:52,022 --> 00:42:54,081 ILLYA: Help! If there's anybody can see us, help us. 677 00:42:54,258 --> 00:42:56,522 [ON TV] Help! 678 00:42:56,693 --> 00:42:58,627 Help! Help, anybody. 679 00:42:58,795 --> 00:43:02,026 MINERVA: Please! Please! 680 00:43:02,199 --> 00:43:06,693 TRUMBULL: And finally, I can give you no better advice than this: 681 00:43:06,870 --> 00:43:11,467 Heed well the words of the man who is about to speak to you... 682 00:43:11,642 --> 00:43:14,907 ...Alexander Waverly. 683 00:43:15,912 --> 00:43:17,903 [APPLAUSE] 684 00:43:20,350 --> 00:43:23,012 Gentlemen of the faculty... 685 00:43:23,654 --> 00:43:28,558 ...parents and members of the graduating class... 686 00:43:28,725 --> 00:43:31,626 MAN [ON RECORDING]: Question 340- Mathematics. 687 00:43:32,162 --> 00:43:35,462 What is the numerical value of pi? 688 00:43:35,632 --> 00:43:40,001 Answer A: 3.14159. 689 00:43:40,170 --> 00:43:45,336 Answer 3: 3- 74758. 690 00:43:46,009 --> 00:43:48,569 DWIGHT 8. NEARY: Answer B. 691 00:43:49,579 --> 00:43:50,978 This is a historic occasion. 692 00:43:51,148 --> 00:43:53,947 It's the first time you both agreed on something. 693 00:43:56,653 --> 00:43:58,644 [BUZZING] 694 00:44:00,524 --> 00:44:02,583 That's impossible. It must be answer B. 695 00:44:02,759 --> 00:44:05,694 Agreed. It must be. 696 00:44:05,862 --> 00:44:07,626 The machine is wrong. 697 00:44:10,434 --> 00:44:13,028 Save your breath, professor. You're gonna need every bit of it. 698 00:44:16,206 --> 00:44:18,197 [STUDENTS CHANTING AND JEERING] 699 00:44:19,409 --> 00:44:22,902 PATRICIA: Hey, kids. Trouble. I need your help. Come on! 700 00:44:26,116 --> 00:44:30,110 WAVERLY: And as I look out over this sea of young faces... 701 00:44:30,287 --> 00:44:34,656 ...I cannot believe those prophets of doom... 702 00:44:35,192 --> 00:44:38,287 ...who are certain that civilization is at its last gasp. 703 00:44:45,635 --> 00:44:47,626 [STUDENTS YELLING] 704 00:44:49,639 --> 00:44:50,868 STUDENT 1: Look. 705 00:44:51,041 --> 00:44:52,031 [MINERVA COUGHING] 706 00:44:52,209 --> 00:44:53,870 STUDENT 2: Hold your breath. 707 00:44:54,044 --> 00:44:55,034 Hold your breath. 708 00:44:55,212 --> 00:44:57,180 STUDENT 1: Untie the ropes. 709 00:44:57,347 --> 00:44:58,974 STUDENT 2: Don't breathe. 710 00:44:59,916 --> 00:45:01,611 STUDENT 1: Hold your breath. 711 00:45:03,153 --> 00:45:05,918 The future is in your hands. 712 00:45:06,089 --> 00:45:10,720 After all, we old ones will not be around much longer. 713 00:45:16,900 --> 00:45:20,894 And then it will be your task to carry forward the torch. 714 00:45:21,071 --> 00:45:27,443 I must admit, the world you inherit from us is not exactly unscaned... 715 00:45:27,611 --> 00:45:28,601 ...but nevertheless-- 716 00:45:28,779 --> 00:45:30,770 [CLEARING THROAT] 717 00:45:32,916 --> 00:45:34,509 [GUN COCKS] 718 00:45:40,357 --> 00:45:41,518 [GUNSHOT] 719 00:45:41,691 --> 00:45:43,682 [CROWD SCREAMING] 720 00:46:10,220 --> 00:46:13,212 SOLO: Dean Dwight. Better stay right where you are. 721 00:46:13,390 --> 00:46:15,449 Run into any Thrush men, you're likely to get killed. 722 00:46:15,625 --> 00:46:17,093 Oh, I doubt that. 723 00:46:17,260 --> 00:46:18,591 [SOLO GRUNTS] 724 00:46:36,246 --> 00:46:38,647 Trumbull! It's him. 725 00:46:38,815 --> 00:46:39,805 Shoot him, Trumbull. 726 00:46:39,983 --> 00:46:41,314 No, Trumbull. It's him. 727 00:46:43,220 --> 00:46:44,585 MINERVA: No! 728 00:46:46,656 --> 00:46:48,146 - Shoot him! - Daddy! 729 00:46:49,993 --> 00:46:51,859 No! 730 00:46:54,264 --> 00:46:55,663 Daddy! 731 00:46:59,536 --> 00:47:01,903 Darling, you saved my life. 732 00:47:02,072 --> 00:47:03,301 [DWIGHT CHUCKLING] 733 00:47:03,473 --> 00:47:05,134 How could you tell us apart? 734 00:47:06,076 --> 00:47:08,340 Don't you think I even know my own daddy? 735 00:47:14,851 --> 00:47:17,912 SOLO: I thought you were building your superman plans around IIIya. 736 00:47:18,088 --> 00:47:19,317 MINERVA: I was. 737 00:47:19,489 --> 00:47:21,651 But he told me that insanity ran in his family. 738 00:47:21,825 --> 00:47:22,815 [SOLO CHUCKLES] 739 00:47:22,993 --> 00:47:26,861 Well, I couldn't very well expose my future children to that kind of risk. 740 00:47:28,031 --> 00:47:31,296 Why, he even told me that he was a little... 741 00:47:31,468 --> 00:47:32,697 mo”. 742 00:47:32,869 --> 00:47:36,237 Hmm. Crazy like a fox. 743 00:47:36,406 --> 00:47:39,569 Do they still print these things on sheepskin, Timothy? 744 00:47:39,743 --> 00:47:43,338 I'm ashamed to say this to you, Alex. but that's ordinary paper. 745 00:47:43,513 --> 00:47:45,982 Economy has replaced tradition. 746 00:47:46,149 --> 00:47:48,641 Things have changed since you and I were in college. 747 00:47:48,818 --> 00:47:50,980 PATRICIA: Mr. Kuryakin. 748 00:47:53,123 --> 00:47:57,651 - Yes, Miss Darling? - Please. Patricia. 749 00:47:58,862 --> 00:48:02,594 Uh, can I call you IIIya? 750 00:48:03,266 --> 00:48:04,256 Please do. 751 00:48:04,434 --> 00:48:08,769 Heh, you know, Mr. Solo told me how smart you are. 752 00:48:08,972 --> 00:48:12,203 I mean, getting all these answers when you were on the teaching machine. 753 00:48:12,375 --> 00:48:14,605 Oh, he's a very bright guy. 754 00:48:15,045 --> 00:48:18,777 Well, the point is, I'm not. 755 00:48:18,949 --> 00:48:19,973 [GIGGLES] 756 00:48:20,150 --> 00:48:26,055 So I thought that maybe you might tutor me in the evenings. 757 00:48:26,222 --> 00:48:28,554 Mm. He'd do a wonderful job. 758 00:48:28,725 --> 00:48:31,023 You know, there's insanity in my family. 759 00:48:31,194 --> 00:48:32,662 Oh! Heh. 760 00:48:32,829 --> 00:48:35,696 Well, that makes it even more interesting, heh. 761 00:48:35,865 --> 00:48:37,890 You will, won't you? 762 00:48:38,868 --> 00:48:40,563 Why not? 763 00:48:41,471 --> 00:48:42,802 Hey. 764 00:48:43,206 --> 00:48:44,765 I beg your pardon, Miss Dwight? 765 00:48:45,875 --> 00:48:48,276 Well, it just dawned on me. 766 00:48:48,445 --> 00:48:53,144 Since we're friends with U.N.C.L.E., who do we demonstrate against next? 767 00:48:53,316 --> 00:48:55,045 Oh, now, really, Minerva, please. 768 00:48:55,218 --> 00:48:56,879 Don't worry, Timothy. 769 00:48:57,053 --> 00:48:59,750 So long as there are students, there'll be protest. 770 00:48:59,923 --> 00:49:02,984 That's one tradition that will never change. 771 00:49:54,577 --> 00:49:56,568 [ENGLISH SDH]59249

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.