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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:07,893 --> 00:00:09,625 Jackie: Midnight to 6:00 in the morning. 2 00:00:09,661 --> 00:00:12,961 Well, I was shocked, shocked! 3 00:00:12,997 --> 00:00:14,897 You said yes to breakfast. 4 00:00:14,933 --> 00:00:16,464 Oh, yeah. I'm like a supermodel. 5 00:00:16,500 --> 00:00:18,078 "I never get outta bed 6 00:00:18,102 --> 00:00:19,735 for less than $10,000," 7 00:00:19,771 --> 00:00:21,006 or Carrie Bradshaw. 8 00:00:21,272 --> 00:00:24,072 - One or the other. - Aw, shucks. Well... 9 00:00:24,108 --> 00:00:26,308 anyway, I wanted to keep a promise 10 00:00:26,344 --> 00:00:29,348 that you probably don't even remember me making. 11 00:00:30,915 --> 00:00:33,148 Dude, did you dedicate your book to me? 12 00:00:33,184 --> 00:00:36,520 No, Jackie, I did not. 13 00:00:37,220 --> 00:00:41,657 But you said you wanted a personally signed copy when it came out. 14 00:00:41,693 --> 00:00:43,192 - There you are. - Oh, thanks. 15 00:00:43,227 --> 00:00:45,494 This is gonna make me look hella smart on the subway. 16 00:00:45,530 --> 00:00:47,096 Ooh, well, I don't know. 17 00:00:47,132 --> 00:00:48,930 No. 18 00:00:48,966 --> 00:00:52,101 I just broke my no-Hollandaise- before-noon rule. 19 00:00:52,137 --> 00:00:53,702 Fuck! 20 00:00:53,738 --> 00:00:55,407 Sorry, excuse me. 21 00:00:56,608 --> 00:00:57,606 Godspeed. 22 00:01:03,781 --> 00:01:04,780 Hm? 23 00:01:10,722 --> 00:01:11,723 Carrie: Hm? 24 00:01:15,927 --> 00:01:19,628 Oh, E... Enid. Hi! 25 00:01:19,664 --> 00:01:22,797 - Carrie. Hello. - Yeah. 26 00:01:22,833 --> 00:01:25,233 I thought I recognized your highlights 27 00:01:25,269 --> 00:01:28,403 and fairly certain it was your shade, 28 00:01:28,439 --> 00:01:30,772 but I couldn't bring myself to say hello. 29 00:01:30,808 --> 00:01:33,308 - Oh, why not? - Well, I felt terrible 30 00:01:33,344 --> 00:01:35,110 about what happened to your husband. 31 00:01:35,146 --> 00:01:37,073 And then I was mortified 32 00:01:37,109 --> 00:01:39,548 that I hadn't written a condolence card... 33 00:01:39,584 --> 00:01:40,582 That's okay. It's okay. 34 00:01:40,618 --> 00:01:43,614 The truth is, I had my own death. 35 00:01:43,650 --> 00:01:44,887 I'm sure you heard. 36 00:01:44,923 --> 00:01:46,950 My God, no. Who did you lose? 37 00:01:46,986 --> 00:01:50,125 Me. After 34 years at "Vogue," 38 00:01:50,161 --> 00:01:52,828 and then six years before that at "Mademoiselle," 39 00:01:52,864 --> 00:01:54,496 may she rest in peace. 40 00:01:54,532 --> 00:01:57,828 Condé Nast gave me the golden parachute, 41 00:01:57,864 --> 00:01:59,568 if you can believe it. Me. 42 00:01:59,604 --> 00:02:01,236 No, honestly, I can't. 43 00:02:01,272 --> 00:02:02,637 But if it helps to hear, 44 00:02:02,673 --> 00:02:06,175 I'm really enjoying your "Ask Enid" newsletter. 45 00:02:06,211 --> 00:02:09,178 I mean, you must know it's wildly popular. 46 00:02:09,214 --> 00:02:11,347 Yeah, it is. It-It's rivaling "Goop." 47 00:02:11,383 --> 00:02:12,784 Oh! 48 00:02:13,050 --> 00:02:14,816 What are you reading? Something wonderful? 49 00:02:14,852 --> 00:02:18,487 Oh, well, I hope so. It's, um, it's my new book. 50 00:02:18,523 --> 00:02:21,622 - Oh. - Actually, I had s-sent you an email. 51 00:02:21,658 --> 00:02:23,959 It was... I-I don't... It was a while ago. 52 00:02:23,995 --> 00:02:25,160 I don't know if you got it. 53 00:02:25,196 --> 00:02:26,332 No. 54 00:02:27,565 --> 00:02:28,696 Yes. 55 00:02:28,732 --> 00:02:31,199 Y-You wanted me to blurb your book. 56 00:02:31,235 --> 00:02:33,335 Congratulations, by the way. 57 00:02:33,371 --> 00:02:36,505 Well, obviously, the blurb ship has sailed, 58 00:02:36,541 --> 00:02:37,977 but, um... 59 00:02:40,143 --> 00:02:44,680 if you... ever felt inclined, you know, to mention the book 60 00:02:44,716 --> 00:02:46,548 in "Ask Enid," 61 00:02:46,584 --> 00:02:47,828 I mean, I don't have to tell you 62 00:02:47,852 --> 00:02:49,851 how tough publishing is these days. 63 00:02:49,887 --> 00:02:52,621 You know, Carrie, if I mentioned your book, 64 00:02:52,657 --> 00:02:56,358 I would have to mention everyone's book and then... 65 00:02:56,394 --> 00:02:59,560 Oh... does everyone have a book? 66 00:02:59,596 --> 00:03:01,963 Well, I don't. 67 00:03:01,999 --> 00:03:06,301 Mostly to avoid embarrassing situations like this. But, listen, 68 00:03:06,337 --> 00:03:08,003 I'm having a thought. 69 00:03:08,039 --> 00:03:10,042 I like it already. 70 00:03:11,775 --> 00:03:16,812 I'm launching an online magazine called "Vivante!" 71 00:03:16,848 --> 00:03:19,514 - Oh! - That's French for "alive." 72 00:03:19,550 --> 00:03:23,551 - Yes, yes, of course, of course. - It's focused on women our age. 73 00:03:23,587 --> 00:03:27,989 Women our age are grossly underrepresented in the media, 74 00:03:28,025 --> 00:03:30,058 so I-I'd love it if you could get involved. 75 00:03:30,094 --> 00:03:31,326 You're perfect for it. 76 00:03:31,362 --> 00:03:34,495 Oh, oh, my gosh. Well... thank you. 77 00:03:34,531 --> 00:03:35,765 Thank you. 78 00:03:35,801 --> 00:03:37,065 Enid: Oh! Excuse me. 79 00:03:37,101 --> 00:03:40,601 This is my new beau. He's really something. 80 00:03:40,637 --> 00:03:43,772 I'll send you the "Vivante!" info. 81 00:03:43,808 --> 00:03:46,909 - Okay. - Enid: Hey, handsome. 82 00:03:46,945 --> 00:03:49,911 Tippleton Lake Camp! Final boarding! 83 00:03:49,947 --> 00:03:51,746 Harry: Okay, this is it. 84 00:03:51,782 --> 00:03:54,216 Charlotte: Baby, I'm gonna miss you so much! 85 00:03:54,252 --> 00:03:55,617 It's only four weeks, Mom. 86 00:03:55,653 --> 00:03:57,052 I will see you visiting day. 87 00:03:57,088 --> 00:03:58,587 - Leila: Lily! - Leila! Love you guys! 88 00:03:58,623 --> 00:03:59,967 - Harry: Bye. - Charlotte: Sweetheart, love you! 89 00:03:59,991 --> 00:04:02,590 Summer fun is boarding now! 90 00:04:02,626 --> 00:04:05,139 - I love you, I love you, I love you, baby girl! - Charlotte: Bye, you guys! 91 00:04:05,163 --> 00:04:06,690 Did you remember to pack my retainer? 92 00:04:06,726 --> 00:04:08,930 I am 95% sure. 93 00:04:08,966 --> 00:04:11,132 - Hi! - That leaves a 5% window of error. 94 00:04:11,168 --> 00:04:12,701 I don't like those odds. 95 00:04:12,737 --> 00:04:14,569 - Lisa: Bye! - Be good. Bye, baby. 96 00:04:14,605 --> 00:04:17,405 - Did you pack your deodorant? - Yeah, yeah. 95% sure. 97 00:04:17,441 --> 00:04:18,973 Lisa: Ha! 98 00:04:19,009 --> 00:04:21,310 What are you guys gonna do with all your kid-free time? 99 00:04:21,346 --> 00:04:23,313 Both: Oh... work. 100 00:04:23,349 --> 00:04:24,349 Kinky. 101 00:04:24,849 --> 00:04:26,647 No kids, no interruptions. 102 00:04:26,683 --> 00:04:28,049 And now that my film is in Tribeca, 103 00:04:28,085 --> 00:04:30,552 I have a zillion polishes and clearances 104 00:04:30,588 --> 00:04:33,255 that I can do without any guilt. 105 00:04:33,291 --> 00:04:37,159 I've got a huge backlog of pro-bono things I wanna dive into. 106 00:04:37,195 --> 00:04:39,127 - You two? - Yeah, um... 107 00:04:39,163 --> 00:04:42,731 Things we're behind on, too. 108 00:04:46,104 --> 00:04:48,771 Lisa/Charlotte: Aww. 109 00:04:51,843 --> 00:04:55,009 - Okay! Bye, guys! - All right, bye! 110 00:04:55,045 --> 00:04:57,678 - Let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go! - Okay, okay, okay! 111 00:04:57,714 --> 00:04:59,493 They are definitely gettin' it on. 112 00:04:59,517 --> 00:05:01,516 I don't think I've ever seen Harry run. 113 00:05:01,552 --> 00:05:03,585 Don't forget our 20th anniversary party! 114 00:05:03,621 --> 00:05:05,621 - Charlotte: Okay! - Harry: Okay, okay. Go, go, go. 115 00:05:05,656 --> 00:05:10,024 So, I've invited my dad to the party. 116 00:05:10,060 --> 00:05:12,288 - Your father and my mother in the same room? - Yeah. 117 00:05:12,324 --> 00:05:14,495 Have you learned nothing from Gabby's baptism? 118 00:05:14,531 --> 00:05:17,599 Don't get upset. The kids are gone. 119 00:05:44,896 --> 00:05:47,099 - Good morning! - Morning. 120 00:05:52,871 --> 00:05:54,069 Good morning, honey. 121 00:05:54,105 --> 00:05:56,208 We have to be there at 1:00. 122 00:05:57,676 --> 00:05:59,308 Do those headphones work? 123 00:05:59,344 --> 00:06:02,143 Obviously not if I can hear you. 124 00:06:02,179 --> 00:06:03,178 Charlotte: Right. 125 00:06:09,620 --> 00:06:11,623 We're due at therapy at 1:00! 126 00:06:17,095 --> 00:06:19,098 Oh, fuck. 127 00:06:35,145 --> 00:06:39,714 - Hey, do I present as a 75-year-old retiree? - There you are. 128 00:06:39,750 --> 00:06:43,751 - Be honest. - Why on earth would you ask that? 129 00:06:43,787 --> 00:06:48,791 Well, my former boss and mentor, who is in her 70s, 130 00:06:48,827 --> 00:06:53,729 alluded to us being the same age 131 00:06:53,765 --> 00:06:57,193 not once, not twice, but thrice 132 00:06:57,229 --> 00:06:58,967 the other day when I ran into her. 133 00:06:59,003 --> 00:07:01,703 - I counted. - She wishes you were in her group. 134 00:07:01,739 --> 00:07:02,883 You're not. You're in my group. 135 00:07:02,907 --> 00:07:05,040 We're sophomores, not seniors. 136 00:07:05,076 --> 00:07:07,242 Just stop using the word "thrice." 137 00:07:07,278 --> 00:07:08,723 Don't get me wrong, the woman's amazing, 138 00:07:08,747 --> 00:07:10,579 but now she wants me to write for her 139 00:07:10,615 --> 00:07:13,047 online magazine, "Vivante!" 140 00:07:13,083 --> 00:07:15,785 If you need a magazine to remind yourself 141 00:07:15,821 --> 00:07:17,419 that you're alive... 142 00:07:17,455 --> 00:07:18,754 you've got bigger problems. 143 00:07:18,790 --> 00:07:20,221 Well, now I've got a bigger problem 144 00:07:20,257 --> 00:07:23,893 'cause she invited me to attend her start-up. 145 00:07:23,929 --> 00:07:27,365 God bless, but a retirement magazine? 146 00:07:27,764 --> 00:07:29,964 - I'm not there yet. - Well, I'll never be there. 147 00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:32,567 Trust me, I'll be pushing penthouses from the grave. 148 00:07:32,603 --> 00:07:34,915 I mean, I just started the second book of a three-book deal. 149 00:07:34,939 --> 00:07:36,516 I still have friends that call me "dude." 150 00:07:36,540 --> 00:07:38,340 Exactly. Just ignore her, dude. 151 00:07:38,376 --> 00:07:41,510 Who is this sad, desperate woman anyway? 152 00:07:41,546 --> 00:07:43,982 She was my editor at "Vogue." Enid Frick. 153 00:07:44,548 --> 00:07:48,784 Okay... we have to start this whole conversation over. 154 00:07:48,820 --> 00:07:50,252 The woman's a legend. 155 00:07:50,288 --> 00:07:52,353 - Mm. - Do you subscribe to "Ask Enid"? 156 00:07:52,389 --> 00:07:54,322 I will literally buy anything she recommends. 157 00:07:54,358 --> 00:07:58,126 Yes, exactly, which is why I shamelessly asked her to plug my book. 158 00:07:58,162 --> 00:08:00,328 Brilliant move. They'll fly off the shelves. 159 00:08:00,364 --> 00:08:01,630 No, no, no, no. She said no. 160 00:08:01,666 --> 00:08:02,865 If she plugs my book, 161 00:08:02,901 --> 00:08:04,178 she has to plug everyone's book. 162 00:08:04,202 --> 00:08:05,767 "No" is the opening offer. 163 00:08:05,803 --> 00:08:07,835 Everything's a negotiation. In my business, 164 00:08:07,871 --> 00:08:10,105 it's, "Throw in the custom loveseat, it's a yes." 165 00:08:10,141 --> 00:08:12,640 In yours, it's, "I came to your old lady start-up 166 00:08:12,676 --> 00:08:15,314 and you plug my book in 'Ask Enid.'" 167 00:08:15,846 --> 00:08:20,483 - Can I do that? - You have to go to that old lady event and work it. 168 00:08:23,521 --> 00:08:26,025 Another text from this guy? 169 00:08:27,492 --> 00:08:29,624 That's a beauty. The car, not the man. 170 00:08:29,660 --> 00:08:33,295 "Wrong number." What is happening? 171 00:08:33,331 --> 00:08:37,568 Was my life recently hacked by the AARP? 172 00:08:37,934 --> 00:08:43,005 Oh, not wrong number. "Carrie Bradshaw? Marlon Shaffer. 173 00:08:43,041 --> 00:08:45,574 A little birdie gave me your number." 174 00:08:45,610 --> 00:08:48,677 - Who's the "little birdie"? - Who's Marlon Shaffer? 175 00:08:48,713 --> 00:08:52,547 And where does he buy his yellow sweater? 176 00:08:52,583 --> 00:08:55,017 Charlotte: Ooh. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 177 00:08:55,053 --> 00:08:56,584 - Oh. Oh yeah. - Like that. 178 00:08:56,620 --> 00:08:58,031 - Yeah, just like that. - You are so fuckin' hot. 179 00:08:58,055 --> 00:09:00,188 Ooh, you are so fuckin' hot. 180 00:09:00,224 --> 00:09:02,390 - I'm close, baby. - Ooh! H-Harry, Harry, 181 00:09:02,426 --> 00:09:04,058 do you wanna come on my tits? 182 00:09:04,094 --> 00:09:05,940 -It's not even my birthday. That's a birthday thing. -Oh God! 183 00:09:05,964 --> 00:09:07,697 I know, but it's like birthday 184 00:09:07,733 --> 00:09:08,997 and Hanukkah and Christmas 185 00:09:09,033 --> 00:09:11,433 all rolled into one. Let's do it! 186 00:09:11,469 --> 00:09:14,102 Okay? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 187 00:09:16,207 --> 00:09:18,068 Ooh, ooh! 188 00:09:18,104 --> 00:09:19,875 Ah! 189 00:09:21,479 --> 00:09:22,912 Woo! 190 00:09:22,948 --> 00:09:26,384 Oof, we still got it, babe... We still got it. 191 00:09:26,818 --> 00:09:28,820 Do we? 192 00:09:31,423 --> 00:09:32,888 Harry... 193 00:09:32,924 --> 00:09:35,424 did you just fake an orgasm? 194 00:09:35,460 --> 00:09:37,626 What? No. 195 00:09:37,662 --> 00:09:39,298 Why do you think... 196 00:09:40,598 --> 00:09:41,600 Where is it? 197 00:09:42,633 --> 00:09:45,366 And then, there was nothing there. 198 00:09:45,402 --> 00:09:46,636 And according to Harry, 199 00:09:46,672 --> 00:09:49,104 the orgasm was very present 200 00:09:49,140 --> 00:09:52,140 and powerful, just invisible. 201 00:09:52,176 --> 00:09:53,976 So, it's Casper the Friendly Cum? 202 00:09:54,012 --> 00:09:55,543 Oh, my God! 203 00:09:55,579 --> 00:09:57,046 Don't you dare call him that. 204 00:09:57,082 --> 00:09:59,047 Why're you lookin' at me? She's the potty mouth. 205 00:09:59,083 --> 00:10:00,443 Excuse me... 206 00:10:00,479 --> 00:10:03,051 can I ask how you made this discovery? 207 00:10:03,087 --> 00:10:05,486 Well, normally, he would come inside me. 208 00:10:05,522 --> 00:10:08,590 - Uh-huh. - This was just a special treat since the kids are away. 209 00:10:08,626 --> 00:10:12,662 - Aw. - So, who knows how long it's been going on. 210 00:10:12,698 --> 00:10:15,330 And this is a problem why? 211 00:10:15,366 --> 00:10:18,300 I-I mean, I-I haven't been with a man in a while, 212 00:10:18,336 --> 00:10:20,568 but jizz-free sex sounds like an upgrade. 213 00:10:20,604 --> 00:10:22,416 Guess that should've been our first clue about you. 214 00:10:22,440 --> 00:10:24,840 Why, do you enjoy it? 215 00:10:24,876 --> 00:10:26,909 I've never given it any thought, 216 00:10:26,945 --> 00:10:30,140 literally until this moment, 217 00:10:30,176 --> 00:10:32,718 but to me... jizz... 218 00:10:33,385 --> 00:10:35,251 jizz... 219 00:10:35,287 --> 00:10:37,819 jizz... 220 00:10:37,855 --> 00:10:41,689 jizz is like an old friend that gets on your nerves. 221 00:10:41,725 --> 00:10:44,259 - Miranda: Mm. - You know? I think I'd miss it if it were gone. 222 00:10:44,295 --> 00:10:45,827 Aw, that's sweet. 223 00:10:45,863 --> 00:10:48,597 Miranda: Anthony, as the sole ejaculator in the group, 224 00:10:48,633 --> 00:10:51,133 can you shed any light on this particular phenomenon? 225 00:10:51,169 --> 00:10:52,801 Thank you, Rachel Maddow. 226 00:10:52,837 --> 00:10:55,504 I believe the clinical term is "Dust-Balls." 227 00:10:55,540 --> 00:10:58,373 - Oh. - I have no personal experience with this, 228 00:10:58,409 --> 00:11:00,375 either as a cum-er or cum-ee. 229 00:11:00,411 --> 00:11:02,844 I'm like a milking machine, if you must know. 230 00:11:02,880 --> 00:11:04,057 - 'Scuse me. - Waiter: Yes, sir? 231 00:11:04,081 --> 00:11:05,325 - Little mayo, please? - Waiter: Right away. 232 00:11:05,349 --> 00:11:07,349 See? I've never been a fan of mayo, either. 233 00:11:07,385 --> 00:11:08,511 - Another clue. - Carrie: Hm. 234 00:11:08,547 --> 00:11:11,653 Well, I've always been a fan of mayo. 235 00:11:11,689 --> 00:11:14,817 It's like the confetti at a parade. 236 00:11:14,853 --> 00:11:18,827 It's like the finale of fireworks on the 4th of July. 237 00:11:18,863 --> 00:11:20,395 I love you so much right now. 238 00:11:20,431 --> 00:11:22,898 Me too. Who knew you were a cum-slut? 239 00:11:22,934 --> 00:11:24,670 Hey, don't cum-slut-shame her. 240 00:11:25,069 --> 00:11:26,847 That is gonna be your new name in my phone, though. 241 00:11:26,871 --> 00:11:28,804 Okay, shh. 242 00:11:28,840 --> 00:11:30,903 And the children, just in time. 243 00:11:31,237 --> 00:11:32,875 It is 10 o'clock. 244 00:11:32,911 --> 00:11:34,342 - Yeah. - We are not begging 245 00:11:34,378 --> 00:11:35,911 one of our children to go to bed, 246 00:11:35,947 --> 00:11:37,312 we are at The Mark, 247 00:11:37,348 --> 00:11:41,316 we are having a nightcap after a long day's work. 248 00:11:41,352 --> 00:11:44,219 Do you realize that we are having an actual conversation 249 00:11:44,255 --> 00:11:46,055 - without interruptions? - Hm. 250 00:11:46,091 --> 00:11:47,489 We are listening to each other 251 00:11:47,525 --> 00:11:50,592 - and getting things done. - What can't we do... 252 00:11:50,628 --> 00:11:51,860 Both: With the kids away. 253 00:11:51,896 --> 00:11:54,098 Lisa: Mm. 254 00:11:54,631 --> 00:11:56,765 After FedEx-ing Gabby's retainer, 255 00:11:56,801 --> 00:11:58,533 I walked by the Mark Kasabian Gallery 256 00:11:58,569 --> 00:12:00,081 and realized I wanted him to come to the party 257 00:12:00,105 --> 00:12:01,336 so I invited him, he's coming. 258 00:12:01,372 --> 00:12:03,205 - Is that okay? - Of course, it is. 259 00:12:03,241 --> 00:12:06,240 - You know why? - Both: Because the kids are away! 260 00:12:06,276 --> 00:12:09,278 Oh, and thank you for handling the party invitations. 261 00:12:09,314 --> 00:12:10,879 I was happy to take it off your plate. 262 00:12:10,915 --> 00:12:12,384 Your hands are more than full now. 263 00:12:13,385 --> 00:12:14,950 In fact... 264 00:12:14,986 --> 00:12:16,551 you know that run 265 00:12:16,587 --> 00:12:18,721 I've been mullin' over for City Comptroller? 266 00:12:18,757 --> 00:12:20,189 Oh, you mean threatening? 267 00:12:20,225 --> 00:12:23,229 Well, this morning, when I was workin' out, 268 00:12:23,762 --> 00:12:25,764 I decided on a bit of a re-think. 269 00:12:26,130 --> 00:12:28,631 I think it would be too much, especially now. 270 00:12:28,667 --> 00:12:29,730 Are you sure? 271 00:12:29,766 --> 00:12:30,978 I mean, I know how much 272 00:12:31,002 --> 00:12:33,601 - you wanna do for this city. - Yeah, I do. 273 00:12:33,637 --> 00:12:36,872 But there'll be time for that when the kids are older, but not now. 274 00:12:36,908 --> 00:12:38,907 And we both know with my campaigning, 275 00:12:38,943 --> 00:12:42,044 it would all fall... on you, 276 00:12:42,080 --> 00:12:44,246 and I think that would be unfair. 277 00:12:44,282 --> 00:12:47,983 I love "no kids" us so much. 278 00:12:48,019 --> 00:12:48,854 Mm-hmm. 279 00:12:50,321 --> 00:12:52,654 Shall I order two more espresso martinis? 280 00:12:52,690 --> 00:12:55,991 So that we can... be wide awake to go home and... 281 00:12:56,027 --> 00:12:57,427 - Work more? - Yeah. 282 00:12:57,463 --> 00:12:58,460 Yeah. 283 00:12:58,496 --> 00:13:00,128 Hm. 284 00:13:00,164 --> 00:13:03,502 - Nothing to worry about. - Oh, good. Good! 285 00:13:03,868 --> 00:13:07,472 Excuse me about the power bar. Busy day, low blood sugar. 286 00:13:08,305 --> 00:13:10,439 Um, you just had a "dry orgasm," 287 00:13:10,475 --> 00:13:12,477 or retrograde ejaculation. 288 00:13:13,043 --> 00:13:15,546 Your semen went into your bladder instead of your penis. 289 00:13:16,046 --> 00:13:20,816 - Why would it do that? - Um, Dr. Chang, once this starts happening, 290 00:13:20,852 --> 00:13:23,289 is there any way to... 291 00:13:25,056 --> 00:13:27,089 - Redirect traffic? - Yes! 292 00:13:27,125 --> 00:13:30,826 Sure. Right now, your muscles are not well-coordinated 293 00:13:30,862 --> 00:13:32,260 with your pelvic floor. 294 00:13:32,296 --> 00:13:34,696 - I have one of those? - Dr. Chang: You sure do. 295 00:13:34,732 --> 00:13:35,968 Ever heard of Kegels? 296 00:13:36,401 --> 00:13:38,934 Heard of it? It's all I eat during the High Holidays. 297 00:13:38,970 --> 00:13:41,997 Honey, not kugel. Kegels. 298 00:13:42,033 --> 00:13:44,705 They're exercises to strengthen the muscles down there. 299 00:13:44,741 --> 00:13:48,310 I'm an expert. I can teach you. It'll be fun. 300 00:13:48,346 --> 00:13:49,945 I bet not as fun as kugel. 301 00:13:49,981 --> 00:13:54,549 Okay, we're gonna lift and squeeze the sphincter. 302 00:13:54,585 --> 00:13:56,551 But remember, it's not your butthole. 303 00:13:56,587 --> 00:13:58,186 You are not trying to hold in a fart. 304 00:13:58,222 --> 00:13:59,399 ‘Cause I already know how to do that. 305 00:13:59,423 --> 00:14:01,823 Yes. So, remember what he said, 306 00:14:01,859 --> 00:14:04,560 "Think of your penis like an elephant's trunk, 307 00:14:04,596 --> 00:14:07,362 slurping from the river." 308 00:14:07,398 --> 00:14:10,632 - Okay, slurp it up! - Oh, baby. 309 00:14:10,668 --> 00:14:15,170 -Come on now, slurp! Let's see it. -Yes, ma'am. Slurp. 310 00:14:18,009 --> 00:14:20,475 - Slurp. - You call that a slurp? 311 00:14:20,511 --> 00:14:22,344 Ugh. Give me your hand, feel mine. 312 00:14:22,380 --> 00:14:23,879 Miss, we hardly know each other. 313 00:14:23,915 --> 00:14:24,980 Harry, get serious. 314 00:14:25,016 --> 00:14:26,814 Do ya ever wanna come again or not? 315 00:14:26,850 --> 00:14:28,544 I do. I-I wanna, I wanna shoot all over you. 316 00:14:28,580 --> 00:14:30,389 Okay then, let's do this. 317 00:14:31,388 --> 00:14:33,054 Are you freakin' kiddin' me?! 318 00:14:33,090 --> 00:14:35,924 - It's like a steel trap down there. - You are welcome. 319 00:14:35,960 --> 00:14:39,995 I do three sets of 10, three times a day, 320 00:14:40,031 --> 00:14:41,831 so you can suck it up. 321 00:14:41,867 --> 00:14:45,533 Now, come on. Two, three, four. 322 00:14:45,569 --> 00:14:49,437 Slurp that sperm from the pelvic floor. 323 00:14:49,473 --> 00:14:52,078 -The rhyming helps. -Oh, good, good, good! Come on! 324 00:14:53,439 --> 00:14:55,677 So, who would like... 325 00:14:55,713 --> 00:14:58,246 - Okay, I'll start. - Great... Brady. 326 00:14:58,282 --> 00:15:00,082 Brady: Yeah, so it's been three weeks. 327 00:15:00,118 --> 00:15:01,918 I'm pretty much done talking about my breakup. 328 00:15:01,952 --> 00:15:04,352 - Like, I'm good with all that. - I agree, buddy. 329 00:15:04,388 --> 00:15:05,720 You're a champ, you know? 330 00:15:05,756 --> 00:15:07,767 So, is there anything else that we should be, you know, 331 00:15:07,791 --> 00:15:10,859 - doing or thinking about? - Yeah, your breakup. 332 00:15:10,895 --> 00:15:14,433 Luisa's gone, fuckin' whatever. What about you two? 333 00:15:15,400 --> 00:15:17,265 - What about us? - Mom, come on. 334 00:15:17,301 --> 00:15:18,800 Do you think I'm an idiot or something? 335 00:15:18,836 --> 00:15:21,202 Steve: Hey! Nobody's saying you're an idiot. 336 00:15:21,238 --> 00:15:25,908 Uh, me and your Mom are keeping our stuff separate, that's all. 337 00:15:25,944 --> 00:15:28,276 You installed a punching bag in your bedroom. 338 00:15:28,312 --> 00:15:30,379 And Mom's fuckin' banished herself to the couch, 339 00:15:30,415 --> 00:15:31,615 pretending she's fine with it. 340 00:15:31,644 --> 00:15:34,316 I am fine with it... for now. 341 00:15:34,352 --> 00:15:37,486 Right, yeah, well, I'm not. 342 00:15:37,522 --> 00:15:39,654 Are you two separating or what? 343 00:15:39,690 --> 00:15:43,258 Your mom and I, you know, can talk about this privately. 344 00:15:43,294 --> 00:15:44,726 We don't wanna drag you in... 345 00:15:44,762 --> 00:15:46,594 I'm right here in the middle of it. 346 00:15:46,630 --> 00:15:47,941 You're up there like "Raging Bull." 347 00:15:47,965 --> 00:15:50,598 I can barely sleep, and I'm heavily medicated. 348 00:15:50,634 --> 00:15:52,902 You are not heavily medicated. 349 00:15:52,938 --> 00:15:54,803 Okay, then give me more. 350 00:15:54,839 --> 00:15:57,339 Laurel: Okay... what I'm hearing is 351 00:15:57,375 --> 00:16:00,741 there's a lot of underlying tension in the house. 352 00:16:00,777 --> 00:16:04,112 This is a good time to look at the family dynamic as a whole. 353 00:16:04,148 --> 00:16:08,154 I mean, what can I say? You know, it is what it is. 354 00:16:09,888 --> 00:16:11,523 Nothing. Mom? 355 00:16:12,056 --> 00:16:13,091 Mom? 356 00:16:13,658 --> 00:16:16,495 - This is not who she is, just so you know. - Miranda? 357 00:16:17,996 --> 00:16:20,095 We both wanna be home for Brady. 358 00:16:20,131 --> 00:16:21,967 Yeah, well, it's not helping. 359 00:16:22,567 --> 00:16:25,133 I think it might be in everyone's best interest 360 00:16:25,169 --> 00:16:28,470 to find a more permanent solution. 361 00:16:28,506 --> 00:16:31,510 - We're looking for consistency. - Okay. 362 00:16:33,511 --> 00:16:36,611 Then I guess I should find a place. 363 00:16:36,647 --> 00:16:39,815 No, I'll find a place, you know, closer to Scout. 364 00:16:39,851 --> 00:16:41,517 It... That-That's my bar. 365 00:16:41,553 --> 00:16:43,389 Oh, well... 366 00:16:44,922 --> 00:16:46,153 thank you. 367 00:16:47,086 --> 00:16:49,728 Well, Brady, is there anything else on your mind? 368 00:16:50,862 --> 00:16:52,161 Uh, it's kind of off-topic, 369 00:16:52,197 --> 00:16:54,432 but I'm not gonna start college in the fall. 370 00:16:55,199 --> 00:16:58,104 That's okay, Buddy. Whatever you need. 371 00:17:00,504 --> 00:17:02,838 Mom, we can all see that your head is about to explode, 372 00:17:02,874 --> 00:17:04,374 so why don't you just say it? 373 00:17:04,410 --> 00:17:05,844 No. 374 00:17:07,111 --> 00:17:08,878 I have nothing to say. 375 00:17:08,914 --> 00:17:10,523 I have so much to say. 376 00:17:10,547 --> 00:17:12,681 I don't even know where to start. 377 00:17:12,717 --> 00:17:14,982 This is Brady. This is not a kid who self-motivates. 378 00:17:15,018 --> 00:17:18,753 And Steve is just sitting there like it's totally chill 379 00:17:18,789 --> 00:17:21,556 that our son has decided to completely skip college. 380 00:17:21,592 --> 00:17:23,424 Well, why didn't you say anything? 381 00:17:23,460 --> 00:17:27,196 Because I blew us up and we all know it. 382 00:17:27,232 --> 00:17:30,866 It's the silent agreement Steve and I co-signed. 383 00:17:30,902 --> 00:17:33,167 He's not allowed to punch me in the face, 384 00:17:33,203 --> 00:17:36,371 and I'm not allowed to take up any more space than the couch. 385 00:17:36,407 --> 00:17:38,506 - Sounds healthy to me. - Yeah, right. 386 00:17:38,542 --> 00:17:40,575 - Carrie: Welcome home! - Miranda: Welcome home! 387 00:17:40,611 --> 00:17:44,712 Oh, hi, Lyle! I-I didn't know you'd still be here. 388 00:17:44,748 --> 00:17:47,215 - I-It's nice to see you again. - Yeah, you, too. Come on in. 389 00:17:47,251 --> 00:17:49,384 - Oh, great, thanks. - Che: Hey! 390 00:17:49,420 --> 00:17:52,688 - Hey! - Welcome to page 42 of the Ikea catalog! 391 00:17:52,724 --> 00:17:54,890 What? Nice! 392 00:17:54,926 --> 00:17:56,926 Now where do I get the Swedish meatballs? 393 00:17:56,962 --> 00:18:00,195 - Come here. - Oh, my gosh. Oh! 394 00:18:01,499 --> 00:18:05,133 I have to say, Che with an elevator is even hotter 395 00:18:05,169 --> 00:18:07,202 than Che in a five-flight walk-up. 396 00:18:07,238 --> 00:18:10,205 Oh, and if my TV show goes... 397 00:18:10,241 --> 00:18:12,741 - When your TV show goes. - Thank you for that. 398 00:18:12,777 --> 00:18:14,943 And I'm taping in LA, I will have no problem 399 00:18:14,979 --> 00:18:17,479 subletting it for more than I pay. 400 00:18:17,515 --> 00:18:20,147 Now, I'm part of the problem. 401 00:18:21,387 --> 00:18:22,388 Che: Mm. 402 00:18:25,690 --> 00:18:27,289 Hi, I'm Carrie. 403 00:18:27,325 --> 00:18:30,758 I keep waiting for someone to introduce us. 404 00:18:30,794 --> 00:18:32,394 Same here. 405 00:18:32,429 --> 00:18:36,632 Shit. Lyle, this is Carrie. Carrie, this is Lyle. 406 00:18:36,668 --> 00:18:38,100 - Hi. - Hi. Nice to meet you. 407 00:18:38,136 --> 00:18:39,479 - Likewise. - All right, I'll take that. 408 00:18:39,503 --> 00:18:41,502 - I'm the designated bartender. - Oh... Oh, okay. 409 00:18:41,538 --> 00:18:44,406 Lyle is a mixologist at the Malibu Soho House. 410 00:18:44,442 --> 00:18:46,308 That's right, but lower your expectations. 411 00:18:46,344 --> 00:18:49,978 'Cause Che has no fancy glassware. Or any glassware. 412 00:18:50,014 --> 00:18:51,847 Hey, show me the bedroom. 413 00:18:51,883 --> 00:18:54,516 Oh! Okay. 414 00:18:54,552 --> 00:18:57,822 But just show her. I'm only here for one drink. 415 00:18:58,355 --> 00:19:00,059 Loud and clear. 416 00:19:01,993 --> 00:19:04,693 So... Carrie, what's your story? 417 00:19:04,729 --> 00:19:07,929 Let's see. What is my story? 418 00:19:07,965 --> 00:19:10,265 Well, as I mentioned, I'm only here for one drink, 419 00:19:10,301 --> 00:19:11,700 and I'd much rather talk about you, 420 00:19:11,736 --> 00:19:15,470 a gentleman wearing a ring on every single finger. 421 00:19:15,506 --> 00:19:18,777 What, pray-tell, is your story? 422 00:19:19,344 --> 00:19:21,376 - Well, I was married to Che for two years. - Mm! 423 00:19:21,412 --> 00:19:23,156 So, that's a short story. 424 00:19:23,180 --> 00:19:24,512 And the rings are a holdover 425 00:19:24,548 --> 00:19:27,349 from my Beverly Hills hairdressing days. 426 00:19:27,385 --> 00:19:31,553 - A Beverly Hills hairdresser. - Mm-hmm. 427 00:19:31,589 --> 00:19:35,858 Perhaps, I'll be staying for more than just one drink. 428 00:19:35,894 --> 00:19:38,897 Oh... I just... 429 00:19:40,231 --> 00:19:43,565 I guess I didn't think that Lyle would still be here. 430 00:19:43,601 --> 00:19:46,001 Mm, did you think he'd drive me in his truck 431 00:19:46,037 --> 00:19:47,669 all the way from LA to Hudson Yards, 432 00:19:47,705 --> 00:19:50,333 load up all my new shit from Ikea, 433 00:19:50,369 --> 00:19:53,575 swing by my old place, get my clothes, 434 00:19:53,611 --> 00:19:56,045 turn around and drive 3,000 miles back? 435 00:19:56,081 --> 00:19:58,213 Oh, shit, that was loud. 436 00:19:58,249 --> 00:20:02,317 Okay... I guess when you put it that way. 437 00:20:02,353 --> 00:20:06,154 I just... I just miss being with you. 438 00:20:06,190 --> 00:20:07,889 So much. 439 00:20:07,925 --> 00:20:11,026 Me too... Me too. 440 00:20:11,062 --> 00:20:12,897 He'll be sleeping on the couch. 441 00:20:13,297 --> 00:20:14,530 - Okay. - Okay. 442 00:20:14,566 --> 00:20:16,197 - Cameron Diaz... - Mm. 443 00:20:16,233 --> 00:20:18,266 - Eva Longoria, Che Diaz... - Wow. 444 00:20:18,302 --> 00:20:20,668 - Before they were Che. - Really? 445 00:20:20,704 --> 00:20:24,206 Oh, yeah, yeah. This was, uh, this was in 2010. 446 00:20:24,242 --> 00:20:26,874 Che was in LA to tape "Funny Latina Ladies" for Showtime. 447 00:20:26,910 --> 00:20:30,746 And an agent told them to lose the long, flowing 448 00:20:30,782 --> 00:20:33,115 - Carrie Underwood hair. - Oh, my God. 449 00:20:33,151 --> 00:20:36,017 Mm-hmm. So, Che came in... 450 00:20:36,053 --> 00:20:40,689 - Mm-hmm. - I gave them a sexy shag, and then... we shagged. 451 00:20:40,725 --> 00:20:44,626 - It's very "Shampoo" of you. - Mm, total compliment. 452 00:20:44,662 --> 00:20:48,797 Anyway, Che got cut from the special and blamed the new haircut, 453 00:20:48,833 --> 00:20:50,966 so the least I could do was marry them. 454 00:20:51,002 --> 00:20:52,301 Yep. 455 00:20:52,337 --> 00:20:53,572 - Oh, shit! - Oh! 456 00:20:53,972 --> 00:20:55,741 Oh, shit. 457 00:20:57,443 --> 00:20:58,540 Che: Oh. 458 00:20:58,576 --> 00:21:00,308 We broke your couch. 459 00:21:00,344 --> 00:21:02,911 It's the side you screwed in, man. 460 00:21:02,947 --> 00:21:05,880 Carrie: Happy Housewarming! 461 00:21:05,916 --> 00:21:08,917 - There you are. - Happy anniversary, my love. 462 00:21:08,953 --> 00:21:10,385 Happy anniversary, baby. 463 00:21:10,421 --> 00:21:13,721 - Hi! So sorry we're late. - We were workin' out. 464 00:21:13,757 --> 00:21:16,291 - Is that what we're callin' it now? - It's not what you think. 465 00:21:16,327 --> 00:21:18,293 Lisa: Well... you're not late at all. 466 00:21:18,329 --> 00:21:20,162 You're actually the first to arrive. 467 00:21:20,198 --> 00:21:22,898 - Oh. - Do I not exist? 468 00:21:22,934 --> 00:21:24,833 Oh, I am so sorry, Mother Wexley. 469 00:21:24,869 --> 00:21:27,635 Yes, you were punctual, as always. 470 00:21:27,671 --> 00:21:29,804 Uh, Harry, they have got a beautiful whiskey over here. 471 00:21:29,840 --> 00:21:32,043 - I know you're gonna love it. - Excellent. 472 00:21:32,643 --> 00:21:35,744 Oh, wow! Everything looks so beautiful. 473 00:21:35,780 --> 00:21:38,680 - Did you rent out the whole place? - Lisa: Yes. 474 00:21:38,716 --> 00:21:41,516 Is that Mark Kasabian? Do you know him? 475 00:21:41,552 --> 00:21:43,853 Yes, he sold me the Amy Sherald 476 00:21:43,889 --> 00:21:45,453 and then a few other paintings. 477 00:21:45,489 --> 00:21:47,455 Hello! Happy anniversary! 478 00:21:47,491 --> 00:21:48,856 - Sorry, I'm late. - Lisa: Aw! 479 00:21:48,892 --> 00:21:52,527 The Jim Stall Installation needed a little extra TLC. 480 00:21:52,563 --> 00:21:56,431 - Hello. Mark Kasabian. - Hi. I am Charlotte York Goldenblatt. 481 00:21:56,467 --> 00:21:58,867 I have been to your gallery countless times. 482 00:21:58,903 --> 00:22:00,368 It's a pleasure to meet you. 483 00:22:00,404 --> 00:22:02,604 And you're not late, Mark, we just started. 484 00:22:02,640 --> 00:22:04,539 Oh, but, uh, didn't you say 7:30? 485 00:22:04,575 --> 00:22:06,975 Yes. I guess everyone is stuck in traffic? 486 00:22:07,011 --> 00:22:09,177 Well, I've been here since 7:15 487 00:22:09,213 --> 00:22:12,251 and not so much as an hors d'oeuvre. 488 00:22:12,651 --> 00:22:15,050 Okay, why don't we all go in? 489 00:22:15,086 --> 00:22:17,385 How did I ever make it 20 years? 490 00:22:17,421 --> 00:22:19,187 ♪ At last ♪ 491 00:22:19,223 --> 00:22:21,660 Oh, Daddy, I'm so happy you came. 492 00:22:22,259 --> 00:22:28,063 Darling, this looks like it has the makings of a magical evening. 493 00:22:28,099 --> 00:22:31,867 You've approached me with that same hors d'oeuvre 494 00:22:31,903 --> 00:22:34,737 for the second time so far. 495 00:22:34,773 --> 00:22:36,839 Spoke too soon. 496 00:22:36,875 --> 00:22:38,708 Harry... I'd like to think that 497 00:22:38,744 --> 00:22:40,675 we're more than just "dad" friends. 498 00:22:40,711 --> 00:22:42,511 Oh, that's nice 'cause I feel the same way. 499 00:22:42,547 --> 00:22:45,080 I-I think of us as "friend" friends. 500 00:22:45,116 --> 00:22:48,050 Good... That's why I sat you next to my mother. 501 00:22:48,086 --> 00:22:49,852 You seem so familiar to me. 502 00:22:49,888 --> 00:22:52,154 Well, I used to work at the Wickham Gallery, 503 00:22:52,190 --> 00:22:53,821 back when Banks Thurlow owned it. 504 00:22:53,857 --> 00:22:57,525 Wait, a-are you the young girl who discovered Sonya Sklaroff, 505 00:22:57,561 --> 00:22:59,923 - right out of RISD? - That was me. 506 00:22:59,959 --> 00:23:01,897 Yes, I used to be her. 507 00:23:01,933 --> 00:23:03,764 I can't believe you remember that. 508 00:23:03,800 --> 00:23:06,101 I always remember memorable people. 509 00:23:06,137 --> 00:23:08,236 - Ha! - Happy anniversary. 510 00:23:08,272 --> 00:23:10,773 Thank you. Harry, this is 511 00:23:10,809 --> 00:23:13,875 Lisa's father, Mr. Lawrence Todd. 512 00:23:13,911 --> 00:23:16,511 He is a renowned playwright and poet, 513 00:23:16,547 --> 00:23:18,180 and founder of the Newark Free Theater. 514 00:23:18,216 --> 00:23:20,515 No kiddin'. That's very impressive. 515 00:23:20,551 --> 00:23:22,184 Are you like my son-in-law here, 516 00:23:22,220 --> 00:23:24,853 who's a highly paid centurion 517 00:23:24,889 --> 00:23:27,089 to the great god of Wall Street? 518 00:23:27,125 --> 00:23:28,451 Eh, not exactly. 519 00:23:28,487 --> 00:23:31,026 I'm more involved in the re-distribution of wealth. 520 00:23:31,062 --> 00:23:32,639 I'm a divorce lawyer. 521 00:23:32,663 --> 00:23:35,598 So, I guess it's all lawyers and bankers tonight, 522 00:23:35,634 --> 00:23:37,265 as I feared. 523 00:23:37,301 --> 00:23:39,801 Honey, I just texted Susan to see how close they were, 524 00:23:39,837 --> 00:23:43,571 and she just wrote back, “What are you talking about? We're in Capri.” 525 00:23:43,607 --> 00:23:45,774 I mean, surely you were tracking the RSVPs, right? 526 00:23:45,810 --> 00:23:49,015 - On the Paperless Post? - I think so... Hang on. 527 00:23:51,116 --> 00:23:54,320 Um... I think I see the problem. 528 00:23:54,747 --> 00:23:57,151 And? 529 00:23:57,187 --> 00:24:00,026 -I never hit send. -What do you mean? You never hit send on what? 530 00:24:00,959 --> 00:24:03,462 The invitations?! Herbert! 531 00:24:04,496 --> 00:24:07,829 So... hello. 532 00:24:07,865 --> 00:24:10,998 We, uh, we wanted to keep you up to speed on, 533 00:24:11,034 --> 00:24:14,001 uh, this, uh, situation that we find ourselves in. 534 00:24:14,037 --> 00:24:17,839 - Honey, would you... - Herbert forgot to hit send on the invitations. 535 00:24:17,875 --> 00:24:20,242 So, all of you who are actually here 536 00:24:20,278 --> 00:24:22,744 were invited the old-fashioned way, by talking. 537 00:24:22,780 --> 00:24:26,142 Everyone else is in Europe or the Hamptons by now. 538 00:24:26,178 --> 00:24:27,915 So, I hope you're hungry 539 00:24:27,951 --> 00:24:32,087 because we have a four-course meal coming for 31 people. 540 00:24:32,123 --> 00:24:34,125 - Oh, my God. - Herbert: And, uh... 541 00:24:34,792 --> 00:24:36,395 and oysters don't keep. 542 00:24:37,529 --> 00:24:38,627 Okay, full disclosure. 543 00:24:38,663 --> 00:24:39,995 I was planning to stop in 544 00:24:40,031 --> 00:24:42,497 for a quick drink and then take off... 545 00:24:42,533 --> 00:24:45,500 but now it feels too awkward to leave. 546 00:24:45,536 --> 00:24:47,706 Oh, no, you can't leave now. 547 00:24:48,206 --> 00:24:51,205 - Oh, no. We took our wedding very seriously. - Lyle: Mm-hmm. 548 00:24:51,241 --> 00:24:55,143 We were married in Vegas by an Elvis impersonator... 549 00:24:55,179 --> 00:24:58,647 both of us dressed as Elvis. 550 00:24:58,683 --> 00:25:01,483 Oh... Jannie was dressed as Priscilla. 551 00:25:01,519 --> 00:25:03,384 - Oh, Jannie. - Jannie. 552 00:25:03,420 --> 00:25:06,489 - Who's Jannie? - Jannie was, kind of, our girlfriend 553 00:25:06,525 --> 00:25:07,823 for a few months. 554 00:25:07,859 --> 00:25:09,490 Yeah, we were poly-pioneers. 555 00:25:09,526 --> 00:25:11,526 - Uh-huh. - Miranda: Meanwhile, I was cutting up 556 00:25:11,562 --> 00:25:14,196 carrot sticks for Brady's lunchbox. 557 00:25:16,601 --> 00:25:18,633 - Carrie, I know what you're thinking. - Hm? 558 00:25:18,669 --> 00:25:21,136 Really? 'Cause I'm not even sure. 559 00:25:21,172 --> 00:25:23,704 This wasn't some pervy, straight guy idea. 560 00:25:23,740 --> 00:25:25,580 In fact, I wasn't even down with this at first, 561 00:25:25,611 --> 00:25:26,976 but young Che over here 562 00:25:27,012 --> 00:25:28,643 wanted to break out of the old norms. 563 00:25:28,679 --> 00:25:31,046 - Hello?! Not just me. - Lyle: Mm-hmm. 564 00:25:31,082 --> 00:25:33,148 Lyle: It was totally just you. 565 00:25:33,184 --> 00:25:35,150 You said, you said it was important for us 566 00:25:35,186 --> 00:25:37,819 - to push our relationship boundaries, right? - Ah. 567 00:25:37,855 --> 00:25:41,223 And, and, and, and if I was afraid to explore that... 568 00:25:41,259 --> 00:25:44,359 I wasn't for you, so I figured, well... 569 00:25:44,395 --> 00:25:46,161 "happy life, happy wife." 570 00:25:46,197 --> 00:25:49,568 - Marriage takes sacrifice. - Lyle: Speaking of sacrifice... 571 00:25:50,768 --> 00:25:53,202 Jannie was my first pegging. 572 00:25:53,238 --> 00:25:55,703 - Well, look at the time. - Oh, I guess that's not 573 00:25:55,739 --> 00:25:57,672 - ice-breaker conversation. - Oh, shit. 574 00:25:57,708 --> 00:26:00,042 Is my first strap-on experience off the table? 575 00:26:00,078 --> 00:26:02,210 - Che/Lyle: Aww. - You know, I still don't know 576 00:26:02,246 --> 00:26:04,913 how I feel about the first time I wore a strap-on. 577 00:26:04,949 --> 00:26:06,381 How am I still in this room? 578 00:26:06,417 --> 00:26:10,018 Oh, okay. We'll walk ya out. 579 00:26:10,054 --> 00:26:11,754 - Lobster, sir? - More lobster? 580 00:26:11,790 --> 00:26:12,655 Charlotte: Hello. 581 00:26:12,691 --> 00:26:14,022 Herbert: Oh, more lobster! 582 00:26:14,058 --> 00:26:15,703 - Eat up, everyone. - No, no thank you. 583 00:26:15,727 --> 00:26:17,793 There's, uh, lots more of it. 584 00:26:17,829 --> 00:26:19,094 Mother... 585 00:26:19,130 --> 00:26:21,796 wouldn't you like to come down here and join us? 586 00:26:21,832 --> 00:26:26,805 This was the only seat without the air conditioning blasting on it. 587 00:26:27,571 --> 00:26:29,399 Honey, go back and keep her company. 588 00:26:29,435 --> 00:26:31,440 Yeah, I feel like I did my time. 589 00:26:31,476 --> 00:26:33,145 Waiter: More lobster, sir? 590 00:26:35,914 --> 00:26:37,112 Thank you. 591 00:26:37,148 --> 00:26:39,881 Texting at the table. I-I apologize. 592 00:26:39,917 --> 00:26:41,917 Well, if you weren't so nice, 593 00:26:41,953 --> 00:26:44,656 you would be home by now, so I'll allow it. 594 00:26:44,922 --> 00:26:48,089 My 10-year-old found a way to smuggle her cell phone into camp 595 00:26:48,125 --> 00:26:50,337 - and she's torturing me nonstop... - Waiter: Another lobster, sir. 596 00:26:50,361 --> 00:26:52,227 Begging to be picked up. 597 00:26:52,263 --> 00:26:55,430 Oh, both my kids were homesick first time at sleepaway camp. 598 00:26:55,466 --> 00:26:57,665 Yours will adjust, I promise. 599 00:26:57,701 --> 00:27:01,136 Madness. This is Delilah again! 600 00:27:01,172 --> 00:27:03,773 Oh, don't answer it. In fact, give it to me. 601 00:27:03,809 --> 00:27:05,574 - Excuse me? - I'm serious. 602 00:27:05,610 --> 00:27:07,955 - If they smell weakness, they are like bloodhounds... - Dad. 603 00:27:07,979 --> 00:27:10,012 And they will go in for the kill. 604 00:27:10,048 --> 00:27:12,216 Give me the phone. 605 00:27:12,716 --> 00:27:16,318 I'd like to make a toast to my beautiful daughter, Lisa, 606 00:27:16,354 --> 00:27:20,089 and her magnificent film that I've just been told 607 00:27:20,125 --> 00:27:25,026 is in the Tribeca Film Festival! 608 00:27:25,062 --> 00:27:27,128 He does know it's our anniversary, right? 609 00:27:27,164 --> 00:27:29,309 Lisa: Thank you, Daddy. Cheers! 610 00:27:29,333 --> 00:27:31,503 - Happy news! - Hear, hear. 611 00:27:32,537 --> 00:27:35,170 Shit! 612 00:27:35,206 --> 00:27:36,241 Fuck. 613 00:27:36,808 --> 00:27:38,309 Well, I guess he was exhausted. 614 00:27:39,175 --> 00:27:41,609 Miranda: Could you wake him up and move him to the couch? 615 00:27:41,645 --> 00:27:44,647 The broken couch? 616 00:27:44,683 --> 00:27:45,881 He sleeps like a dead man. 617 00:27:45,917 --> 00:27:47,549 And, honestly, I am so tired. 618 00:27:47,585 --> 00:27:49,253 I'm gonna pass out, too. 619 00:27:50,020 --> 00:27:53,523 - Ugh. - You're gonna make it up to me tomorrow. 620 00:27:53,559 --> 00:27:54,560 Okay. 621 00:27:57,162 --> 00:27:59,765 Ugh. Oh, God. 622 00:28:00,431 --> 00:28:04,499 So, Delilah's mother, my third ex-wife, had a mid-life crisis. 623 00:28:04,535 --> 00:28:08,337 - I guess it was all too much for her. - Well, there are very few 624 00:28:08,373 --> 00:28:10,165 Lisa Todd Wexleys in the world, 625 00:28:10,201 --> 00:28:12,419 - who can juggle everything so gracefully. - We have 31 buffers between 'em. 626 00:28:12,443 --> 00:28:15,344 And look at her now, getting back to her passion. 627 00:28:15,380 --> 00:28:16,515 Waiter: More wine, ma'am? 628 00:28:17,783 --> 00:28:19,815 Why don't you follow her lead? 629 00:28:19,851 --> 00:28:21,250 Come work for me. 630 00:28:21,286 --> 00:28:24,385 - If only. - No, I-I'm, I'm being serious. 631 00:28:24,421 --> 00:28:26,521 I would love to invite someone 632 00:28:26,557 --> 00:28:28,758 with your taste and tenacity 633 00:28:28,794 --> 00:28:30,425 into my gallery. And I promise, 634 00:28:30,461 --> 00:28:33,932 it's not only to rip the phone out of my hand occasionally. 635 00:28:34,699 --> 00:28:35,701 Oh, d... 636 00:28:37,201 --> 00:28:40,035 It-It's been so long and, and... 637 00:28:40,071 --> 00:28:42,738 my kids need me even more these days. 638 00:28:42,774 --> 00:28:43,770 But... 639 00:28:44,942 --> 00:28:49,177 you've really made my night by asking me. 640 00:28:49,213 --> 00:28:51,817 If you ever change your mind, you know where I am. 641 00:28:53,712 --> 00:28:57,785 Okay... I think it's safe to leave now. 642 00:28:57,821 --> 00:29:01,923 Hey, uh, everyone, uh, uh, dessert's comin' up. 643 00:29:01,959 --> 00:29:04,425 Uh, save room, there's lots of it. 644 00:29:04,461 --> 00:29:08,263 Lisa: Yes, in fact, this is a very special dessert 645 00:29:08,299 --> 00:29:10,531 from our first date 646 00:29:10,567 --> 00:29:13,305 - when you took me for coffee and cake... - Oh, yeah. 647 00:29:13,939 --> 00:29:15,368 Oh, my God. 648 00:29:15,901 --> 00:29:18,206 - What? - Oh, my God, I forgot to order the cake. 649 00:29:18,242 --> 00:29:19,774 Herbert: What?! 650 00:29:19,810 --> 00:29:23,879 Lisa, did you say you forgot to order the cake? 651 00:29:23,915 --> 00:29:27,315 Yes! Yes, I did. I'm so sorry. 652 00:29:27,351 --> 00:29:29,250 Well, I'm stuffed. 653 00:29:29,286 --> 00:29:31,152 Maybe it's a blessin' in disguise, right? 654 00:29:31,188 --> 00:29:33,749 Eunice: Well, if I understand you correctly, 655 00:29:33,785 --> 00:29:36,558 you didn't send out the proper invitations 656 00:29:36,594 --> 00:29:39,097 because you were working so much. 657 00:29:39,597 --> 00:29:43,465 And then, you forgot to order the cake. 658 00:29:43,501 --> 00:29:47,503 Shall I tell you why I never forgot to order the cake? 659 00:29:47,539 --> 00:29:49,638 Mother, please. 660 00:29:49,674 --> 00:29:52,474 Because I baked them all myself 661 00:29:52,510 --> 00:29:54,343 and I was happy to do it. 662 00:29:54,379 --> 00:29:57,773 It helped my husband's business to flourish. 663 00:29:57,809 --> 00:30:00,282 Yeah, well, things are a little different now. 664 00:30:00,318 --> 00:30:01,850 I have my own career. 665 00:30:01,886 --> 00:30:06,321 And I had mine. I was a concert pianist, 666 00:30:06,357 --> 00:30:10,525 but when I became a mother, my priorities changed. 667 00:30:10,561 --> 00:30:11,538 May I have my phone back, please? 668 00:30:11,562 --> 00:30:13,028 Lawrence Todd: Well, Mrs. Wexley, 669 00:30:13,064 --> 00:30:16,198 just because you let your dream wither away 670 00:30:16,234 --> 00:30:19,267 doesn't mean that my daughter has to. 671 00:30:19,303 --> 00:30:21,937 Lisa Todd is an artist. 672 00:30:21,973 --> 00:30:26,608 She's putting beauty and ideas into the world, 673 00:30:26,644 --> 00:30:31,614 rather than just praying to the almighty dollar... 674 00:30:31,650 --> 00:30:33,282 like your son here. 675 00:30:33,318 --> 00:30:34,528 Thank you for the compliment, Daddy, 676 00:30:34,552 --> 00:30:36,646 but Herbert is concerned with lots of things 677 00:30:36,682 --> 00:30:38,153 that have nothing to do with money. 678 00:30:38,189 --> 00:30:40,226 Really? Could've fooled me. 679 00:30:40,826 --> 00:30:43,225 Name one project that he's working on 680 00:30:43,261 --> 00:30:46,032 that doesn't revolve around profit. 681 00:30:46,598 --> 00:30:48,464 Um... 682 00:30:48,500 --> 00:30:50,102 I rest my case. 683 00:30:54,071 --> 00:30:56,905 Herbert is running for City Comptroller. 684 00:30:56,941 --> 00:30:59,007 - He is?! - He is? 685 00:30:59,043 --> 00:31:02,678 - I am? - Yes! He wants to give back. 686 00:31:02,714 --> 00:31:07,152 And I support his decision 100%. 687 00:31:07,686 --> 00:31:10,753 - Hear, hear! - All: Cheers! 688 00:31:10,789 --> 00:31:12,558 Can I come back down there now? 689 00:31:37,983 --> 00:31:40,281 Are we really doing this? 690 00:31:40,317 --> 00:31:42,684 I-I feel like my freshman-year roommate 691 00:31:42,720 --> 00:31:45,721 who used to have sex while I was three feet away in the next bed. 692 00:31:47,459 --> 00:31:48,460 Yeah. 693 00:31:52,096 --> 00:31:54,333 Okay. 694 00:31:58,503 --> 00:32:00,739 Oh, yeah. 695 00:32:28,432 --> 00:32:30,369 Are you okay with this? 696 00:32:34,005 --> 00:32:35,136 Thank you for asking. 697 00:32:35,172 --> 00:32:36,650 I need to think about this for a minute 698 00:32:36,674 --> 00:32:39,341 because my visceral reaction is "no," 699 00:32:39,377 --> 00:32:41,276 but maybe that's just fear of the unknown. 700 00:32:41,312 --> 00:32:45,113 Because, I mean, how will I ever know unless I try it? 701 00:32:45,149 --> 00:32:47,349 We're all here. It's kinda hot. 702 00:32:47,385 --> 00:32:49,821 It's getting less hot the more you talk. 703 00:32:58,395 --> 00:33:00,399 Che: Ooh, is that a yes? 704 00:33:02,201 --> 00:33:03,202 Yes. 705 00:33:13,177 --> 00:33:14,913 Oh, yeah. 706 00:33:47,077 --> 00:33:50,178 - Ow, ow, ow! Charley horse! Ow! - Oh! No, no, no! 707 00:33:50,214 --> 00:33:52,993 - Ow, ow, ow! Oh, that's bad! - What's wrong, what's wrong, what's wrong?! 708 00:33:53,017 --> 00:33:56,886 Um... ow... 709 00:33:56,922 --> 00:33:58,157 I just... 710 00:33:58,757 --> 00:34:01,189 You know what, guys? 711 00:34:01,225 --> 00:34:03,859 This just isn't me, so just, just... 712 00:34:03,895 --> 00:34:06,494 You should... you should carry on. 713 00:34:06,530 --> 00:34:09,698 Seriously, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm good with it. 714 00:34:09,734 --> 00:34:12,337 Ow! Fuck! Ow. 715 00:34:12,570 --> 00:34:14,073 Fucking hell. Ow. 716 00:34:36,961 --> 00:34:38,163 Hey... 717 00:34:38,663 --> 00:34:41,167 you really didn't have to stop. I meant that. 718 00:34:42,233 --> 00:34:45,071 Oh, I know... but I missed you. 719 00:34:46,971 --> 00:34:48,407 Aww. 720 00:34:50,008 --> 00:34:52,140 Oh, God. 721 00:34:56,682 --> 00:35:00,686 There we go. Yeah. 722 00:35:02,153 --> 00:35:03,355 Both: Oh! 723 00:35:08,124 --> 00:35:13,062 If you're calling to ask to be my wing-man at "Vivante!" the answer is yes. 724 00:35:13,098 --> 00:35:14,496 Oh, no, I couldn't come to that. 725 00:35:14,532 --> 00:35:17,265 You know what they say, never meet your heroes. 726 00:35:17,301 --> 00:35:20,970 Do they also say, "Never ask your old boss to plug your book?" 727 00:35:21,006 --> 00:35:22,675 Because, um... 728 00:35:23,441 --> 00:35:25,773 I might not be brave enough to pull that off today. 729 00:35:25,809 --> 00:35:28,155 Seema : Okay, that's why I called. I sensed you'd cave. 730 00:35:28,179 --> 00:35:31,312 Carrie, don't be afraid to be transactional. 731 00:35:31,348 --> 00:35:34,249 Enid's a work-contact, not a gal-pal. 732 00:35:34,285 --> 00:35:36,418 - Uh, I'll do what I can. - Do more. 733 00:35:36,454 --> 00:35:37,765 You need this for your book sales. 734 00:35:37,789 --> 00:35:39,588 And just don't get in any photo 735 00:35:39,624 --> 00:35:40,655 near women with walkers. 736 00:35:40,691 --> 00:35:42,458 That'd be a brand-killer for you. 737 00:35:42,494 --> 00:35:43,695 Let's go, Rocco. 738 00:35:44,896 --> 00:35:46,761 - Hello. Hello. - Welcome. 739 00:35:46,797 --> 00:35:48,598 Hi. Can we get a photo of you three ladies? 740 00:35:48,634 --> 00:35:49,765 Oh, I... N... 741 00:35:49,801 --> 00:35:50,978 - D... Oh, uh... - Sheila: Yes. 742 00:35:51,002 --> 00:35:52,334 Oh, no, I don't wanna... 743 00:35:52,370 --> 00:35:54,035 My hair is so... No, no, no. 744 00:35:54,071 --> 00:35:55,504 Thank you, but thank you. 745 00:36:01,012 --> 00:36:02,048 Oh. 746 00:36:02,348 --> 00:36:03,581 Can I, um... 747 00:36:03,848 --> 00:36:05,047 Do you need any help? 748 00:36:05,083 --> 00:36:07,319 Do I look like I need help? 749 00:36:08,419 --> 00:36:09,850 Kinda. 750 00:36:09,886 --> 00:36:12,721 So, tell me when you need me to do the thing, okay? 751 00:36:12,757 --> 00:36:14,189 - Okay. - Okay. All right. 752 00:36:14,225 --> 00:36:15,369 - That's Gloria Steinem. - Oh, my gosh! 753 00:36:15,393 --> 00:36:16,859 Hello, hello, hello. 754 00:36:16,895 --> 00:36:18,393 - Oh! - Hi, how are you? 755 00:36:18,429 --> 00:36:19,999 Guest: That was Gloria Steinem! 756 00:36:21,266 --> 00:36:23,231 - Enid, hi. - Hi. 757 00:36:23,267 --> 00:36:27,969 - Thank you for including me. - Well, when I got the idea for "Vivante!" 758 00:36:28,005 --> 00:36:31,040 the first name that I thought of was Carrie Bradshaw. 759 00:36:31,076 --> 00:36:34,509 And, um... Oh, hello. 760 00:36:34,545 --> 00:36:37,412 - That's Jane Rosen. - Money. 761 00:36:37,448 --> 00:36:40,210 Uh, I should say hello. You and I will talk later. 762 00:36:40,246 --> 00:36:42,846 Oh, great! And, and because just to circle back 763 00:36:42,882 --> 00:36:45,153 to our earlier conversation, 764 00:36:45,189 --> 00:36:46,655 the one that we were, 765 00:36:46,691 --> 00:36:48,490 you know, having at breakfast the other day... 766 00:36:48,526 --> 00:36:50,691 Carrie! Carrie, hello! 767 00:36:50,727 --> 00:36:53,362 - Oy. - Oh, you know Bitsy von Muffling? 768 00:36:53,398 --> 00:36:55,596 - Just tangentially, through my boyfriend. - Mm. 769 00:36:55,632 --> 00:36:57,733 She's only here 'cause she has deep pockets. 770 00:36:57,769 --> 00:37:01,036 - Oh. - Oh, my God. 771 00:37:01,072 --> 00:37:02,838 - Hi. - I don't know what this afternoon 772 00:37:02,874 --> 00:37:05,207 is gonna cost me, but it's worth it. 773 00:37:05,243 --> 00:37:07,370 Gloria Steinem! 774 00:37:07,406 --> 00:37:09,444 -Oh, I saw her. She walked past me. -Oh, I know! 775 00:37:09,480 --> 00:37:12,213 - You look very pink. Pretty... - You... Well, thank you. 776 00:37:12,249 --> 00:37:14,194 - Excuse me, everyone. - Carrie: Oh, oh, oh. 777 00:37:14,218 --> 00:37:15,884 Enid: Ladies, welcome. 778 00:37:15,920 --> 00:37:18,786 I think this might be the greatest gathering 779 00:37:18,822 --> 00:37:21,790 of female minds since Eleanor Roosevelt 780 00:37:21,826 --> 00:37:23,859 had dinner alone at the White House. 781 00:37:25,763 --> 00:37:28,797 Which we know she did often because she wasn't a lot of fun. 782 00:37:28,833 --> 00:37:33,601 Let's get seated so we can begin. 783 00:37:33,637 --> 00:37:38,844 So, what do you think of Marlon Schaffer? 784 00:37:40,678 --> 00:37:44,580 Oh. Oh, are y... You're the little birdie? 785 00:37:44,616 --> 00:37:46,581 - Tweet-tweet. - Oh. 786 00:37:46,617 --> 00:37:50,753 Well, ever since I saw you so, so sad 787 00:37:50,789 --> 00:37:53,122 in the nail salon that day, 788 00:37:53,158 --> 00:37:56,195 I wanted to do whatever I could to cheer you up. 789 00:37:56,628 --> 00:37:58,326 Isn't he wonderful? 790 00:37:58,362 --> 00:38:00,595 Oh, I-I don't... 791 00:38:00,631 --> 00:38:04,732 He doesn't exactly seem right for me. 792 00:38:04,768 --> 00:38:07,135 Don't let the Albany area code throw you. 793 00:38:07,171 --> 00:38:09,138 He also has a place in town. 794 00:38:09,174 --> 00:38:11,339 - Okay. - And, Carrie, trust me, 795 00:38:11,375 --> 00:38:15,176 the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else. 796 00:38:15,212 --> 00:38:17,812 You know, maybe I should give this prime seat to... 797 00:38:17,848 --> 00:38:21,283 And if you're going to get under someone, it should be Marlon. 798 00:38:21,319 --> 00:38:23,351 The best sex I've had since Bobby. 799 00:38:23,387 --> 00:38:27,188 I mean, of course, no one could please me in bed like my Bobby. 800 00:38:27,224 --> 00:38:29,757 Oh, so attentive to my needs. 801 00:38:29,793 --> 00:38:32,795 Mr. Broadway loved his lady. 802 00:38:32,831 --> 00:38:35,597 My head is spinning. 803 00:38:35,633 --> 00:38:39,367 I was always under the impression that Bobby was gay. 804 00:38:39,403 --> 00:38:42,103 He was! That's why he tried so hard. 805 00:38:42,139 --> 00:38:43,439 - Oh. - You know me. 806 00:38:43,475 --> 00:38:45,273 I love a challenge. 807 00:38:45,309 --> 00:38:47,675 Clearly unfinished business with my father. Hm. 808 00:38:47,711 --> 00:38:50,545 Oh, Bitsy, I so appreciate it, really, I do, 809 00:38:50,581 --> 00:38:53,281 but I'm, I-I'm, I'm doing much better. 810 00:38:53,317 --> 00:38:54,949 Don't be hasty! 811 00:38:54,985 --> 00:38:58,353 Ladies around town call Marlon "the human tripod" 812 00:38:58,389 --> 00:39:01,393 'cause it's like he has three legs. 813 00:39:02,092 --> 00:39:03,837 - Guest: Do you need a seat, Catherine? - My God. Oh! 814 00:39:03,861 --> 00:39:05,138 - Would you like this...? - Oh, thank you. 815 00:39:05,162 --> 00:39:08,063 Yeah, I... No, I see one way over there. 816 00:39:08,099 --> 00:39:09,192 You have a seat. 817 00:39:09,228 --> 00:39:11,733 So, when Enid told me about "Vivante!" 818 00:39:11,769 --> 00:39:14,802 I thought it sounded like a revolution, 819 00:39:14,838 --> 00:39:18,506 and every revolution starts with a conversation, 820 00:39:18,542 --> 00:39:20,541 which is why we are here. 821 00:39:20,577 --> 00:39:22,911 This is the way "Ms." magazine started. 822 00:39:22,947 --> 00:39:25,247 Can't believe it was a half-century ago. 823 00:39:25,283 --> 00:39:27,249 Oh, my God. 824 00:39:27,285 --> 00:39:30,585 Gloria Steinem: So, maybe the new frontier is aging. 825 00:39:30,621 --> 00:39:34,393 So, this is our new frontier and you are it, folks. 826 00:39:35,259 --> 00:39:37,253 We live longer than men, 827 00:39:37,289 --> 00:39:39,928 which we don't mean to do, actually. 828 00:39:43,034 --> 00:39:46,100 Uh, but for all of us, women and men, 829 00:39:46,136 --> 00:39:50,004 with our much longer life expectancy in this world... 830 00:39:50,040 --> 00:39:56,444 I think we're beginning to see all kinds of new possibilities. 831 00:39:56,480 --> 00:40:01,616 And the more we understand that, the more we stop being divided 832 00:40:01,652 --> 00:40:05,687 by age, and race, and culture, and, and gender. 833 00:40:05,723 --> 00:40:08,624 I love you. I love you so much. 834 00:40:08,660 --> 00:40:11,097 I love you, baby. I love you. 835 00:40:11,930 --> 00:40:14,566 Ooh, ooh! 836 00:40:16,434 --> 00:40:18,366 How'd we do? How'd we do? 837 00:40:18,402 --> 00:40:20,806 Happy Fourth of July. 838 00:40:27,813 --> 00:40:29,777 Oh! Wow, gosh. 839 00:40:29,813 --> 00:40:32,480 - There's probably no original way... - Talk or go! 840 00:40:32,516 --> 00:40:34,382 Oh, sorry. No, you go. Sorry. 841 00:40:34,418 --> 00:40:36,896 -Oh, I think we should... -Here, guess we'll... Yeah, over here. 842 00:40:36,920 --> 00:40:41,256 There's really no... Ooh, I'm sor... Oh, here. Ooh, 's-scuse me. Sorry. 843 00:40:41,292 --> 00:40:42,758 Anyway, there's, like I said, 844 00:40:42,794 --> 00:40:44,059 no original way to say this, 845 00:40:44,095 --> 00:40:45,826 but, so, just thank you. 846 00:40:45,862 --> 00:40:49,431 Thank you. I have admired you my entire life. 847 00:40:49,467 --> 00:40:52,300 Well, I guess that means we care about the same things. 848 00:40:52,336 --> 00:40:54,935 I would like to think so, yes. 849 00:40:54,971 --> 00:40:58,507 - Oh. - And I'm not proud to admit, but I almost didn't come today 850 00:40:58,543 --> 00:41:03,844 because I thought that... maybe I didn't quite belong. 851 00:41:03,880 --> 00:41:07,849 I'm afraid I'm still battling my own deep-seated ageism. 852 00:41:07,885 --> 00:41:09,117 We're all battling that. 853 00:41:09,153 --> 00:41:10,985 But we are at the age of 854 00:41:11,021 --> 00:41:14,690 - our minds, not our wombs, hello. - Yes. Yes, exactly. 855 00:41:14,726 --> 00:41:16,091 - Excuse me. - Ooh. 856 00:41:16,127 --> 00:41:18,660 The "Vivante!" photographer is desperate for you. 857 00:41:18,696 --> 00:41:20,461 - Okay, okay, okay. - Carrie: Oh, thank you. 858 00:41:20,497 --> 00:41:25,634 -We'll meet again. -Okay. I hope so. Thank you. Wow. Wow. 859 00:41:25,670 --> 00:41:27,436 Oh, my gosh, Enid, hi. 860 00:41:27,472 --> 00:41:29,304 Wow. This is... This was thrilling, really. 861 00:41:29,340 --> 00:41:32,474 I would be honored to write for "Vivante!" 862 00:41:32,510 --> 00:41:36,111 Oh, I don't want you to write a thousand words about purses. 863 00:41:36,147 --> 00:41:38,947 I want you to give $100,000. 864 00:41:38,983 --> 00:41:40,510 Uh... pardon me? 865 00:41:40,546 --> 00:41:45,187 We're asking founding donors to give $100,000. 866 00:41:45,223 --> 00:41:50,125 So, I'm, I... I'm not here because of my age, 867 00:41:50,161 --> 00:41:53,161 I'm here because of my deep pockets? 868 00:41:53,197 --> 00:41:55,997 Due to tragic circumstances, 869 00:41:56,033 --> 00:42:00,672 your pockets recently got deeper, so, yes. 870 00:42:01,205 --> 00:42:05,006 Well, Enid... if I gave you $100,000, 871 00:42:05,042 --> 00:42:09,812 I'd have to give everyone $100,000. 872 00:42:09,848 --> 00:42:11,341 - Touché. - Hm. 873 00:42:11,377 --> 00:42:13,315 What if I put you in "Ask Enid," 874 00:42:13,351 --> 00:42:16,051 how much would you be comfortable investing? 875 00:42:16,087 --> 00:42:17,519 Enid, I'm heading out. 876 00:42:17,555 --> 00:42:19,254 Um, forgive me for asking. 877 00:42:19,290 --> 00:42:22,157 Would you mind terribly being in a photo with Enid and me? 878 00:42:22,193 --> 00:42:24,487 - I would love that. - Oh, wow, okay. 879 00:42:24,523 --> 00:42:25,940 - Would you take it? - Sheila: Oh, absolutely. 880 00:42:25,964 --> 00:42:27,996 -Oh, thank you. There you go. -All righty. 881 00:42:28,032 --> 00:42:29,764 -Okay, ladies. -Okay, all right. Here we are. 882 00:42:29,800 --> 00:42:31,834 - We'll do this fast, sorry. - Ready for picture. 883 00:42:33,071 --> 00:42:35,003 Fabulous. Fabulous. 884 00:42:35,039 --> 00:42:38,273 - Thank you. - Thank you so much, Gloria. 885 00:42:38,309 --> 00:42:39,744 Bye. Safe home. 886 00:42:41,111 --> 00:42:44,947 - Let me eyeball that, I've been burned before. - Sure, turn it the other way. 887 00:42:44,983 --> 00:42:45,985 Oh. 888 00:42:48,620 --> 00:42:49,616 Uh... 889 00:42:50,455 --> 00:42:51,887 Carrie? 890 00:42:51,923 --> 00:42:54,256 Are you schtupping my boyfriend? 891 00:42:54,292 --> 00:42:57,893 W-What? W-Why would you even ask that? 892 00:42:57,929 --> 00:42:59,761 This is my Marlon's pecker. 893 00:42:59,797 --> 00:43:03,131 - Why would you have this if you weren't dating him? - Oh. No, no, no, no. 894 00:43:03,167 --> 00:43:07,906 Someone was trying to set me up with him, and I said no. 895 00:43:08,272 --> 00:43:10,640 I, I would never date a man that old. 896 00:43:10,676 --> 00:43:12,610 But I would? 897 00:43:12,976 --> 00:43:17,478 So... let's circle back to what we were talking about before. 898 00:43:17,514 --> 00:43:19,414 Before you called me old? 899 00:43:19,450 --> 00:43:22,484 So, how much did you say you wanted? 900 00:43:22,520 --> 00:43:25,087 I don't think I have my checkbook with me today, 901 00:43:25,123 --> 00:43:27,654 - but... - PayPal works. 902 00:43:28,793 --> 00:43:30,759 Okay, yeah. 903 00:43:30,795 --> 00:43:32,794 I don't use PayPal much, so. 904 00:43:32,830 --> 00:43:38,733 And just like that, Enid and I became PayPals. 905 00:43:41,506 --> 00:43:46,712 ♪ And we're only two stars away from Heaven ♪ 906 00:43:48,379 --> 00:43:50,812 ♪ Hear me out, I'm the one ♪ 907 00:43:50,848 --> 00:43:54,616 ♪ And we're only two stars away ♪ 908 00:43:54,652 --> 00:43:57,288 ♪ Closer each day ♪ 909 00:43:57,888 --> 00:44:01,961 ♪ Every night I try to keep you occupied ♪ 910 00:44:06,063 --> 00:44:09,625 ♪ I get smashed on the floor without you ♪ 911 00:44:09,661 --> 00:44:13,072 ♪ When I drop my idle thoughts ♪ 912 00:44:16,707 --> 00:44:20,912 ♪ Got me thinkin' we can take another pass ♪ 913 00:44:26,084 --> 00:44:28,450 ♪ Hear me out, I'm the one ♪ 914 00:44:28,486 --> 00:44:34,093 ♪ And we're only two stars away from heaven ♪ 915 00:44:35,493 --> 00:44:37,860 ♪ Hear me out, I'm the one ♪ 916 00:44:37,896 --> 00:44:41,730 ♪ And we're only two stars away ♪ 917 00:44:41,766 --> 00:44:44,633 ♪ Closer each day ♪ 69342

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