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1
00:00:07,893 --> 00:00:09,625
Jackie: Midnight to
6:00 in the morning.
2
00:00:09,661 --> 00:00:12,961
Well, I was shocked, shocked!
3
00:00:12,997 --> 00:00:14,897
You said yes to breakfast.
4
00:00:14,933 --> 00:00:16,464
Oh, yeah. I'm
like a supermodel.
5
00:00:16,500 --> 00:00:18,078
"I never get outta bed
6
00:00:18,102 --> 00:00:19,735
for less than $10,000,"
7
00:00:19,771 --> 00:00:21,006
or Carrie Bradshaw.
8
00:00:21,272 --> 00:00:24,072
- One or the other.
- Aw, shucks. Well...
9
00:00:24,108 --> 00:00:26,308
anyway, I wanted
to keep a promise
10
00:00:26,344 --> 00:00:29,348
that you probably don't
even remember me making.
11
00:00:30,915 --> 00:00:33,148
Dude, did you dedicate
your book to me?
12
00:00:33,184 --> 00:00:36,520
No,
Jackie, I did not.
13
00:00:37,220 --> 00:00:41,657
But you said you wanted a personally
signed copy when it came out.
14
00:00:41,693 --> 00:00:43,192
- There you are.
- Oh, thanks.
15
00:00:43,227 --> 00:00:45,494
This is gonna make me look
hella smart on the subway.
16
00:00:45,530 --> 00:00:47,096
Ooh, well, I don't know.
17
00:00:47,132 --> 00:00:48,930
No.
18
00:00:48,966 --> 00:00:52,101
I just broke my no-Hollandaise-
before-noon rule.
19
00:00:52,137 --> 00:00:53,702
Fuck!
20
00:00:53,738 --> 00:00:55,407
Sorry, excuse me.
21
00:00:56,608 --> 00:00:57,606
Godspeed.
22
00:01:03,781 --> 00:01:04,780
Hm?
23
00:01:10,722 --> 00:01:11,723
Carrie: Hm?
24
00:01:15,927 --> 00:01:19,628
Oh, E... Enid. Hi!
25
00:01:19,664 --> 00:01:22,797
- Carrie. Hello.
- Yeah.
26
00:01:22,833 --> 00:01:25,233
I thought I recognized
your highlights
27
00:01:25,269 --> 00:01:28,403
and fairly certain
it was your shade,
28
00:01:28,439 --> 00:01:30,772
but I couldn't bring
myself to say hello.
29
00:01:30,808 --> 00:01:33,308
- Oh, why not?
- Well, I felt terrible
30
00:01:33,344 --> 00:01:35,110
about what happened
to your husband.
31
00:01:35,146 --> 00:01:37,073
And then I was mortified
32
00:01:37,109 --> 00:01:39,548
that I hadn't written
a condolence card...
33
00:01:39,584 --> 00:01:40,582
That's okay. It's okay.
34
00:01:40,618 --> 00:01:43,614
The truth is, I
had my own death.
35
00:01:43,650 --> 00:01:44,887
I'm sure you heard.
36
00:01:44,923 --> 00:01:46,950
My God, no. Who did you lose?
37
00:01:46,986 --> 00:01:50,125
Me. After 34 years at "Vogue,"
38
00:01:50,161 --> 00:01:52,828
and then six years before
that at "Mademoiselle,"
39
00:01:52,864 --> 00:01:54,496
may she rest in peace.
40
00:01:54,532 --> 00:01:57,828
Condé Nast gave me
the golden parachute,
41
00:01:57,864 --> 00:01:59,568
if you can believe it. Me.
42
00:01:59,604 --> 00:02:01,236
No, honestly, I can't.
43
00:02:01,272 --> 00:02:02,637
But if it helps to hear,
44
00:02:02,673 --> 00:02:06,175
I'm really enjoying your
"Ask Enid" newsletter.
45
00:02:06,211 --> 00:02:09,178
I mean, you must know
it's wildly popular.
46
00:02:09,214 --> 00:02:11,347
Yeah, it is. It-It's
rivaling "Goop."
47
00:02:11,383 --> 00:02:12,784
Oh!
48
00:02:13,050 --> 00:02:14,816
What are you reading?
Something wonderful?
49
00:02:14,852 --> 00:02:18,487
Oh, well, I hope so. It's,
um, it's my new book.
50
00:02:18,523 --> 00:02:21,622
- Oh.
- Actually, I had s-sent you an email.
51
00:02:21,658 --> 00:02:23,959
It was... I-I don't...
It was a while ago.
52
00:02:23,995 --> 00:02:25,160
I don't know if you got it.
53
00:02:25,196 --> 00:02:26,332
No.
54
00:02:27,565 --> 00:02:28,696
Yes.
55
00:02:28,732 --> 00:02:31,199
Y-You wanted me to
blurb your book.
56
00:02:31,235 --> 00:02:33,335
Congratulations, by the way.
57
00:02:33,371 --> 00:02:36,505
Well, obviously, the
blurb ship has sailed,
58
00:02:36,541 --> 00:02:37,977
but, um...
59
00:02:40,143 --> 00:02:44,680
if you... ever felt inclined,
you know, to mention the book
60
00:02:44,716 --> 00:02:46,548
in "Ask Enid,"
61
00:02:46,584 --> 00:02:47,828
I mean, I don't have to tell you
62
00:02:47,852 --> 00:02:49,851
how tough publishing
is these days.
63
00:02:49,887 --> 00:02:52,621
You know, Carrie, if
I mentioned your book,
64
00:02:52,657 --> 00:02:56,358
I would have to mention
everyone's book and then...
65
00:02:56,394 --> 00:02:59,560
Oh... does everyone
have a book?
66
00:02:59,596 --> 00:03:01,963
Well, I don't.
67
00:03:01,999 --> 00:03:06,301
Mostly to avoid embarrassing
situations like this. But, listen,
68
00:03:06,337 --> 00:03:08,003
I'm having a thought.
69
00:03:08,039 --> 00:03:10,042
I like it already.
70
00:03:11,775 --> 00:03:16,812
I'm launching an online
magazine called "Vivante!"
71
00:03:16,848 --> 00:03:19,514
- Oh!
- That's French for "alive."
72
00:03:19,550 --> 00:03:23,551
- Yes, yes, of course, of course.
- It's focused on women our age.
73
00:03:23,587 --> 00:03:27,989
Women our age are grossly
underrepresented in the media,
74
00:03:28,025 --> 00:03:30,058
so I-I'd love it if
you could get involved.
75
00:03:30,094 --> 00:03:31,326
You're perfect for it.
76
00:03:31,362 --> 00:03:34,495
Oh, oh, my gosh.
Well... thank you.
77
00:03:34,531 --> 00:03:35,765
Thank you.
78
00:03:35,801 --> 00:03:37,065
Enid: Oh! Excuse me.
79
00:03:37,101 --> 00:03:40,601
This is my new beau.
He's really something.
80
00:03:40,637 --> 00:03:43,772
I'll send you the
"Vivante!" info.
81
00:03:43,808 --> 00:03:46,909
- Okay.
- Enid: Hey, handsome.
82
00:03:46,945 --> 00:03:49,911
Tippleton Lake Camp!
Final boarding!
83
00:03:49,947 --> 00:03:51,746
Harry: Okay, this is it.
84
00:03:51,782 --> 00:03:54,216
Charlotte: Baby, I'm
gonna miss you so much!
85
00:03:54,252 --> 00:03:55,617
It's only four weeks, Mom.
86
00:03:55,653 --> 00:03:57,052
I will see you visiting day.
87
00:03:57,088 --> 00:03:58,587
- Leila: Lily!
- Leila! Love you guys!
88
00:03:58,623 --> 00:03:59,967
- Harry: Bye.
- Charlotte: Sweetheart, love you!
89
00:03:59,991 --> 00:04:02,590
Summer fun is boarding now!
90
00:04:02,626 --> 00:04:05,139
- I love you, I love you, I love you, baby girl!
- Charlotte: Bye, you guys!
91
00:04:05,163 --> 00:04:06,690
Did you remember to
pack my retainer?
92
00:04:06,726 --> 00:04:08,930
I am 95% sure.
93
00:04:08,966 --> 00:04:11,132
- Hi!
- That leaves a 5% window of error.
94
00:04:11,168 --> 00:04:12,701
I don't like those odds.
95
00:04:12,737 --> 00:04:14,569
- Lisa: Bye!
- Be good. Bye, baby.
96
00:04:14,605 --> 00:04:17,405
- Did you pack your deodorant?
- Yeah, yeah. 95% sure.
97
00:04:17,441 --> 00:04:18,973
Lisa: Ha!
98
00:04:19,009 --> 00:04:21,310
What are you guys gonna do
with all your kid-free time?
99
00:04:21,346 --> 00:04:23,313
Both: Oh... work.
100
00:04:23,349 --> 00:04:24,349
Kinky.
101
00:04:24,849 --> 00:04:26,647
No kids, no interruptions.
102
00:04:26,683 --> 00:04:28,049
And now that my
film is in Tribeca,
103
00:04:28,085 --> 00:04:30,552
I have a zillion
polishes and clearances
104
00:04:30,588 --> 00:04:33,255
that I can do without any guilt.
105
00:04:33,291 --> 00:04:37,159
I've got a huge backlog of
pro-bono things I wanna dive into.
106
00:04:37,195 --> 00:04:39,127
- You two?
- Yeah, um...
107
00:04:39,163 --> 00:04:42,731
Things we're behind on, too.
108
00:04:46,104 --> 00:04:48,771
Lisa/Charlotte: Aww.
109
00:04:51,843 --> 00:04:55,009
- Okay! Bye, guys!
- All right, bye!
110
00:04:55,045 --> 00:04:57,678
- Let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go!
- Okay, okay, okay!
111
00:04:57,714 --> 00:04:59,493
They are
definitely gettin' it on.
112
00:04:59,517 --> 00:05:01,516
I don't think I've
ever seen Harry run.
113
00:05:01,552 --> 00:05:03,585
Don't forget our 20th
anniversary party!
114
00:05:03,621 --> 00:05:05,621
- Charlotte: Okay!
- Harry: Okay, okay. Go, go, go.
115
00:05:05,656 --> 00:05:10,024
So, I've invited my
dad to the party.
116
00:05:10,060 --> 00:05:12,288
- Your father and my mother in the same room?
- Yeah.
117
00:05:12,324 --> 00:05:14,495
Have you learned nothing
from Gabby's baptism?
118
00:05:14,531 --> 00:05:17,599
Don't get upset.
The kids are gone.
119
00:05:44,896 --> 00:05:47,099
- Good morning!
- Morning.
120
00:05:52,871 --> 00:05:54,069
Good morning, honey.
121
00:05:54,105 --> 00:05:56,208
We have to be there at 1:00.
122
00:05:57,676 --> 00:05:59,308
Do those headphones work?
123
00:05:59,344 --> 00:06:02,143
Obviously not if I can hear you.
124
00:06:02,179 --> 00:06:03,178
Charlotte: Right.
125
00:06:09,620 --> 00:06:11,623
We're due at therapy at 1:00!
126
00:06:17,095 --> 00:06:19,098
Oh, fuck.
127
00:06:35,145 --> 00:06:39,714
- Hey, do I present as a 75-year-old retiree?
- There you are.
128
00:06:39,750 --> 00:06:43,751
- Be honest.
- Why on earth would you ask that?
129
00:06:43,787 --> 00:06:48,791
Well, my former boss and
mentor, who is in her 70s,
130
00:06:48,827 --> 00:06:53,729
alluded to us being the same age
131
00:06:53,765 --> 00:06:57,193
not once, not twice, but thrice
132
00:06:57,229 --> 00:06:58,967
the other day when
I ran into her.
133
00:06:59,003 --> 00:07:01,703
- I counted.
- She wishes you were in her group.
134
00:07:01,739 --> 00:07:02,883
You're not. You're
in my group.
135
00:07:02,907 --> 00:07:05,040
We're sophomores, not seniors.
136
00:07:05,076 --> 00:07:07,242
Just stop using
the word "thrice."
137
00:07:07,278 --> 00:07:08,723
Don't get me wrong,
the woman's amazing,
138
00:07:08,747 --> 00:07:10,579
but now she wants
me to write for her
139
00:07:10,615 --> 00:07:13,047
online magazine, "Vivante!"
140
00:07:13,083 --> 00:07:15,785
If you need a
magazine to remind yourself
141
00:07:15,821 --> 00:07:17,419
that you're alive...
142
00:07:17,455 --> 00:07:18,754
you've got bigger problems.
143
00:07:18,790 --> 00:07:20,221
Well, now I've got
a bigger problem
144
00:07:20,257 --> 00:07:23,893
'cause she invited me
to attend her start-up.
145
00:07:23,929 --> 00:07:27,365
God bless, but a
retirement magazine?
146
00:07:27,764 --> 00:07:29,964
- I'm not there yet.
- Well, I'll never be there.
147
00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:32,567
Trust me, I'll be pushing
penthouses from the grave.
148
00:07:32,603 --> 00:07:34,915
I mean, I just started the
second book of a three-book deal.
149
00:07:34,939 --> 00:07:36,516
I still have friends
that call me "dude."
150
00:07:36,540 --> 00:07:38,340
Exactly. Just
ignore her, dude.
151
00:07:38,376 --> 00:07:41,510
Who is this sad,
desperate woman anyway?
152
00:07:41,546 --> 00:07:43,982
She was my editor at
"Vogue." Enid Frick.
153
00:07:44,548 --> 00:07:48,784
Okay... we have to start
this whole conversation over.
154
00:07:48,820 --> 00:07:50,252
The woman's a legend.
155
00:07:50,288 --> 00:07:52,353
- Mm.
- Do you subscribe to "Ask Enid"?
156
00:07:52,389 --> 00:07:54,322
I will literally buy
anything she recommends.
157
00:07:54,358 --> 00:07:58,126
Yes, exactly, which is why I
shamelessly asked her to plug my book.
158
00:07:58,162 --> 00:08:00,328
Brilliant move. They'll
fly off the shelves.
159
00:08:00,364 --> 00:08:01,630
No, no, no, no. She said no.
160
00:08:01,666 --> 00:08:02,865
If she plugs my book,
161
00:08:02,901 --> 00:08:04,178
she has to plug everyone's book.
162
00:08:04,202 --> 00:08:05,767
"No" is the opening offer.
163
00:08:05,803 --> 00:08:07,835
Everything's a negotiation.
In my business,
164
00:08:07,871 --> 00:08:10,105
it's, "Throw in the custom
loveseat, it's a yes."
165
00:08:10,141 --> 00:08:12,640
In yours, it's, "I came
to your old lady start-up
166
00:08:12,676 --> 00:08:15,314
and you plug my
book in 'Ask Enid.'"
167
00:08:15,846 --> 00:08:20,483
- Can I do that?
- You have to go to that old lady event and work it.
168
00:08:23,521 --> 00:08:26,025
Another text from this guy?
169
00:08:27,492 --> 00:08:29,624
That's a beauty. The
car, not the man.
170
00:08:29,660 --> 00:08:33,295
"Wrong number."
What is happening?
171
00:08:33,331 --> 00:08:37,568
Was my life recently hacked by the AARP?
172
00:08:37,934 --> 00:08:43,005
Oh, not wrong number. "Carrie
Bradshaw? Marlon Shaffer.
173
00:08:43,041 --> 00:08:45,574
A little birdie gave
me your number."
174
00:08:45,610 --> 00:08:48,677
- Who's the "little birdie"?
- Who's Marlon Shaffer?
175
00:08:48,713 --> 00:08:52,547
And where does he buy his yellow sweater?
176
00:08:52,583 --> 00:08:55,017
Charlotte: Ooh. Yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah.
177
00:08:55,053 --> 00:08:56,584
- Oh. Oh yeah.
- Like that.
178
00:08:56,620 --> 00:08:58,031
- Yeah, just like that.
- You are so fuckin' hot.
179
00:08:58,055 --> 00:09:00,188
Ooh, you are so fuckin' hot.
180
00:09:00,224 --> 00:09:02,390
- I'm close, baby.
- Ooh! H-Harry, Harry,
181
00:09:02,426 --> 00:09:04,058
do you wanna come on my tits?
182
00:09:04,094 --> 00:09:05,940
-It's not even my birthday. That's a birthday thing.
-Oh God!
183
00:09:05,964 --> 00:09:07,697
I know, but it's like birthday
184
00:09:07,733 --> 00:09:08,997
and Hanukkah and Christmas
185
00:09:09,033 --> 00:09:11,433
all rolled into
one. Let's do it!
186
00:09:11,469 --> 00:09:14,102
Okay? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
187
00:09:16,207 --> 00:09:18,068
Ooh, ooh!
188
00:09:18,104 --> 00:09:19,875
Ah!
189
00:09:21,479 --> 00:09:22,912
Woo!
190
00:09:22,948 --> 00:09:26,384
Oof, we still got it,
babe... We still got it.
191
00:09:26,818 --> 00:09:28,820
Do we?
192
00:09:31,423 --> 00:09:32,888
Harry...
193
00:09:32,924 --> 00:09:35,424
did you just fake an orgasm?
194
00:09:35,460 --> 00:09:37,626
What? No.
195
00:09:37,662 --> 00:09:39,298
Why do you think...
196
00:09:40,598 --> 00:09:41,600
Where is it?
197
00:09:42,633 --> 00:09:45,366
And then, there
was nothing there.
198
00:09:45,402 --> 00:09:46,636
And according to Harry,
199
00:09:46,672 --> 00:09:49,104
the orgasm was very present
200
00:09:49,140 --> 00:09:52,140
and powerful, just invisible.
201
00:09:52,176 --> 00:09:53,976
So, it's Casper
the Friendly Cum?
202
00:09:54,012 --> 00:09:55,543
Oh, my God!
203
00:09:55,579 --> 00:09:57,046
Don't you dare call him that.
204
00:09:57,082 --> 00:09:59,047
Why're you lookin' at me?
She's the potty mouth.
205
00:09:59,083 --> 00:10:00,443
Excuse me...
206
00:10:00,479 --> 00:10:03,051
can I ask how you
made this discovery?
207
00:10:03,087 --> 00:10:05,486
Well, normally, he
would come inside me.
208
00:10:05,522 --> 00:10:08,590
- Uh-huh.
- This was just a special treat since the kids are away.
209
00:10:08,626 --> 00:10:12,662
- Aw.
- So, who knows how long it's been going on.
210
00:10:12,698 --> 00:10:15,330
And this is a problem why?
211
00:10:15,366 --> 00:10:18,300
I-I mean, I-I haven't been
with a man in a while,
212
00:10:18,336 --> 00:10:20,568
but jizz-free sex
sounds like an upgrade.
213
00:10:20,604 --> 00:10:22,416
Guess that should've been
our first clue about you.
214
00:10:22,440 --> 00:10:24,840
Why, do you enjoy it?
215
00:10:24,876 --> 00:10:26,909
I've never given it any thought,
216
00:10:26,945 --> 00:10:30,140
literally until this moment,
217
00:10:30,176 --> 00:10:32,718
but to me... jizz...
218
00:10:33,385 --> 00:10:35,251
jizz...
219
00:10:35,287 --> 00:10:37,819
jizz...
220
00:10:37,855 --> 00:10:41,689
jizz is like an old friend
that gets on your nerves.
221
00:10:41,725 --> 00:10:44,259
- Miranda: Mm.
- You know? I think I'd miss it if it were gone.
222
00:10:44,295 --> 00:10:45,827
Aw, that's sweet.
223
00:10:45,863 --> 00:10:48,597
Miranda: Anthony, as the
sole ejaculator in the group,
224
00:10:48,633 --> 00:10:51,133
can you shed any light on
this particular phenomenon?
225
00:10:51,169 --> 00:10:52,801
Thank you, Rachel Maddow.
226
00:10:52,837 --> 00:10:55,504
I believe the clinical
term is "Dust-Balls."
227
00:10:55,540 --> 00:10:58,373
- Oh.
- I have no personal experience with this,
228
00:10:58,409 --> 00:11:00,375
either as a cum-er or cum-ee.
229
00:11:00,411 --> 00:11:02,844
I'm like a milking
machine, if you must know.
230
00:11:02,880 --> 00:11:04,057
- 'Scuse me.
- Waiter: Yes, sir?
231
00:11:04,081 --> 00:11:05,325
- Little mayo, please?
- Waiter: Right away.
232
00:11:05,349 --> 00:11:07,349
See? I've never been
a fan of mayo, either.
233
00:11:07,385 --> 00:11:08,511
- Another clue.
- Carrie: Hm.
234
00:11:08,547 --> 00:11:11,653
Well, I've always
been a fan of mayo.
235
00:11:11,689 --> 00:11:14,817
It's like the
confetti at a parade.
236
00:11:14,853 --> 00:11:18,827
It's like the finale of
fireworks on the 4th of July.
237
00:11:18,863 --> 00:11:20,395
I love you so much right now.
238
00:11:20,431 --> 00:11:22,898
Me too. Who knew
you were a cum-slut?
239
00:11:22,934 --> 00:11:24,670
Hey, don't cum-slut-shame her.
240
00:11:25,069 --> 00:11:26,847
That is gonna be your new
name in my phone, though.
241
00:11:26,871 --> 00:11:28,804
Okay, shh.
242
00:11:28,840 --> 00:11:30,903
And the children, just in time.
243
00:11:31,237 --> 00:11:32,875
It is 10 o'clock.
244
00:11:32,911 --> 00:11:34,342
- Yeah.
- We are not begging
245
00:11:34,378 --> 00:11:35,911
one of our children
to go to bed,
246
00:11:35,947 --> 00:11:37,312
we are at The Mark,
247
00:11:37,348 --> 00:11:41,316
we are having a nightcap
after a long day's work.
248
00:11:41,352 --> 00:11:44,219
Do you realize that we are
having an actual conversation
249
00:11:44,255 --> 00:11:46,055
- without interruptions?
- Hm.
250
00:11:46,091 --> 00:11:47,489
We are listening to each other
251
00:11:47,525 --> 00:11:50,592
- and getting things done.
- What can't we do...
252
00:11:50,628 --> 00:11:51,860
Both: With the kids away.
253
00:11:51,896 --> 00:11:54,098
Lisa: Mm.
254
00:11:54,631 --> 00:11:56,765
After FedEx-ing
Gabby's retainer,
255
00:11:56,801 --> 00:11:58,533
I walked by the Mark
Kasabian Gallery
256
00:11:58,569 --> 00:12:00,081
and realized I wanted
him to come to the party
257
00:12:00,105 --> 00:12:01,336
so I invited him, he's coming.
258
00:12:01,372 --> 00:12:03,205
- Is that okay?
- Of course, it is.
259
00:12:03,241 --> 00:12:06,240
- You know why?
- Both: Because the kids are away!
260
00:12:06,276 --> 00:12:09,278
Oh, and thank
you for handling the party invitations.
261
00:12:09,314 --> 00:12:10,879
I was happy to take
it off your plate.
262
00:12:10,915 --> 00:12:12,384
Your hands are
more than full now.
263
00:12:13,385 --> 00:12:14,950
In fact...
264
00:12:14,986 --> 00:12:16,551
you know that run
265
00:12:16,587 --> 00:12:18,721
I've been mullin' over
for City Comptroller?
266
00:12:18,757 --> 00:12:20,189
Oh, you mean threatening?
267
00:12:20,225 --> 00:12:23,229
Well, this morning,
when I was workin' out,
268
00:12:23,762 --> 00:12:25,764
I decided on a
bit of a re-think.
269
00:12:26,130 --> 00:12:28,631
I think it would be too
much, especially now.
270
00:12:28,667 --> 00:12:29,730
Are you sure?
271
00:12:29,766 --> 00:12:30,978
I mean, I know how much
272
00:12:31,002 --> 00:12:33,601
- you wanna do for this city.
- Yeah, I do.
273
00:12:33,637 --> 00:12:36,872
But there'll be time for that when
the kids are older, but not now.
274
00:12:36,908 --> 00:12:38,907
And we both know
with my campaigning,
275
00:12:38,943 --> 00:12:42,044
it would all fall... on you,
276
00:12:42,080 --> 00:12:44,246
and I think that
would be unfair.
277
00:12:44,282 --> 00:12:47,983
I love "no kids" us so much.
278
00:12:48,019 --> 00:12:48,854
Mm-hmm.
279
00:12:50,321 --> 00:12:52,654
Shall I order two more
espresso martinis?
280
00:12:52,690 --> 00:12:55,991
So that we can... be wide
awake to go home and...
281
00:12:56,027 --> 00:12:57,427
- Work more?
- Yeah.
282
00:12:57,463 --> 00:12:58,460
Yeah.
283
00:12:58,496 --> 00:13:00,128
Hm.
284
00:13:00,164 --> 00:13:03,502
- Nothing to worry about.
- Oh, good. Good!
285
00:13:03,868 --> 00:13:07,472
Excuse me about the power bar.
Busy day, low blood sugar.
286
00:13:08,305 --> 00:13:10,439
Um, you
just had a "dry orgasm,"
287
00:13:10,475 --> 00:13:12,477
or retrograde ejaculation.
288
00:13:13,043 --> 00:13:15,546
Your semen went into your
bladder instead of your penis.
289
00:13:16,046 --> 00:13:20,816
- Why would it do that?
- Um, Dr. Chang, once this starts happening,
290
00:13:20,852 --> 00:13:23,289
is there any way to...
291
00:13:25,056 --> 00:13:27,089
- Redirect traffic?
- Yes!
292
00:13:27,125 --> 00:13:30,826
Sure. Right now, your muscles
are not well-coordinated
293
00:13:30,862 --> 00:13:32,260
with your pelvic floor.
294
00:13:32,296 --> 00:13:34,696
- I have one of those?
- Dr. Chang: You sure do.
295
00:13:34,732 --> 00:13:35,968
Ever heard of Kegels?
296
00:13:36,401 --> 00:13:38,934
Heard of it? It's all I eat
during the High Holidays.
297
00:13:38,970 --> 00:13:41,997
Honey, not kugel. Kegels.
298
00:13:42,033 --> 00:13:44,705
They're exercises to strengthen
the muscles down there.
299
00:13:44,741 --> 00:13:48,310
I'm an expert. I can
teach you. It'll be fun.
300
00:13:48,346 --> 00:13:49,945
I bet not as fun as kugel.
301
00:13:49,981 --> 00:13:54,549
Okay, we're gonna lift
and squeeze the sphincter.
302
00:13:54,585 --> 00:13:56,551
But remember, it's
not your butthole.
303
00:13:56,587 --> 00:13:58,186
You are not trying
to hold in a fart.
304
00:13:58,222 --> 00:13:59,399
‘Cause I already
know how to do that.
305
00:13:59,423 --> 00:14:01,823
Yes. So, remember
what he said,
306
00:14:01,859 --> 00:14:04,560
"Think of your penis
like an elephant's trunk,
307
00:14:04,596 --> 00:14:07,362
slurping from the river."
308
00:14:07,398 --> 00:14:10,632
- Okay, slurp it up!
- Oh, baby.
309
00:14:10,668 --> 00:14:15,170
-Come on now, slurp! Let's see it.
-Yes, ma'am. Slurp.
310
00:14:18,009 --> 00:14:20,475
- Slurp.
- You call that a slurp?
311
00:14:20,511 --> 00:14:22,344
Ugh. Give me your
hand, feel mine.
312
00:14:22,380 --> 00:14:23,879
Miss, we hardly know each other.
313
00:14:23,915 --> 00:14:24,980
Harry, get serious.
314
00:14:25,016 --> 00:14:26,814
Do ya ever wanna
come again or not?
315
00:14:26,850 --> 00:14:28,544
I do. I-I wanna, I wanna
shoot all over you.
316
00:14:28,580 --> 00:14:30,389
Okay then, let's do this.
317
00:14:31,388 --> 00:14:33,054
Are you freakin' kiddin' me?!
318
00:14:33,090 --> 00:14:35,924
- It's like a steel trap down there.
- You are welcome.
319
00:14:35,960 --> 00:14:39,995
I do three sets of
10, three times a day,
320
00:14:40,031 --> 00:14:41,831
so you can suck it up.
321
00:14:41,867 --> 00:14:45,533
Now, come on.
Two, three, four.
322
00:14:45,569 --> 00:14:49,437
Slurp that sperm from
the pelvic floor.
323
00:14:49,473 --> 00:14:52,078
-The rhyming helps.
-Oh, good, good, good! Come on!
324
00:14:53,439 --> 00:14:55,677
So, who would like...
325
00:14:55,713 --> 00:14:58,246
- Okay, I'll start.
- Great... Brady.
326
00:14:58,282 --> 00:15:00,082
Brady: Yeah, so it's
been three weeks.
327
00:15:00,118 --> 00:15:01,918
I'm pretty much done
talking about my breakup.
328
00:15:01,952 --> 00:15:04,352
- Like, I'm good with all that.
- I agree, buddy.
329
00:15:04,388 --> 00:15:05,720
You're a champ, you know?
330
00:15:05,756 --> 00:15:07,767
So, is there anything else
that we should be, you know,
331
00:15:07,791 --> 00:15:10,859
- doing or thinking about?
- Yeah, your breakup.
332
00:15:10,895 --> 00:15:14,433
Luisa's gone, fuckin'
whatever. What about you two?
333
00:15:15,400 --> 00:15:17,265
- What about us?
- Mom, come on.
334
00:15:17,301 --> 00:15:18,800
Do you think I'm an
idiot or something?
335
00:15:18,836 --> 00:15:21,202
Steve: Hey! Nobody's
saying you're an idiot.
336
00:15:21,238 --> 00:15:25,908
Uh, me and your Mom are keeping
our stuff separate, that's all.
337
00:15:25,944 --> 00:15:28,276
You installed a punching
bag in your bedroom.
338
00:15:28,312 --> 00:15:30,379
And Mom's fuckin' banished
herself to the couch,
339
00:15:30,415 --> 00:15:31,615
pretending she's fine with it.
340
00:15:31,644 --> 00:15:34,316
I am fine with it... for now.
341
00:15:34,352 --> 00:15:37,486
Right, yeah, well, I'm not.
342
00:15:37,522 --> 00:15:39,654
Are you two separating or what?
343
00:15:39,690 --> 00:15:43,258
Your mom and I, you know, can
talk about this privately.
344
00:15:43,294 --> 00:15:44,726
We don't wanna drag you in...
345
00:15:44,762 --> 00:15:46,594
I'm right here in
the middle of it.
346
00:15:46,630 --> 00:15:47,941
You're up there
like "Raging Bull."
347
00:15:47,965 --> 00:15:50,598
I can barely sleep, and
I'm heavily medicated.
348
00:15:50,634 --> 00:15:52,902
You are not heavily medicated.
349
00:15:52,938 --> 00:15:54,803
Okay, then give me more.
350
00:15:54,839 --> 00:15:57,339
Laurel: Okay...
what I'm hearing is
351
00:15:57,375 --> 00:16:00,741
there's a lot of underlying
tension in the house.
352
00:16:00,777 --> 00:16:04,112
This is a good time to look at
the family dynamic as a whole.
353
00:16:04,148 --> 00:16:08,154
I mean, what can I say?
You know, it is what it is.
354
00:16:09,888 --> 00:16:11,523
Nothing. Mom?
355
00:16:12,056 --> 00:16:13,091
Mom?
356
00:16:13,658 --> 00:16:16,495
- This is not who she is, just so you know.
- Miranda?
357
00:16:17,996 --> 00:16:20,095
We both wanna be home for Brady.
358
00:16:20,131 --> 00:16:21,967
Yeah, well, it's not helping.
359
00:16:22,567 --> 00:16:25,133
I think it might be in
everyone's best interest
360
00:16:25,169 --> 00:16:28,470
to find a more
permanent solution.
361
00:16:28,506 --> 00:16:31,510
- We're looking for consistency.
- Okay.
362
00:16:33,511 --> 00:16:36,611
Then I guess I
should find a place.
363
00:16:36,647 --> 00:16:39,815
No, I'll find a place,
you know, closer to Scout.
364
00:16:39,851 --> 00:16:41,517
It... That-That's my bar.
365
00:16:41,553 --> 00:16:43,389
Oh, well...
366
00:16:44,922 --> 00:16:46,153
thank you.
367
00:16:47,086 --> 00:16:49,728
Well, Brady, is there
anything else on your mind?
368
00:16:50,862 --> 00:16:52,161
Uh, it's kind of off-topic,
369
00:16:52,197 --> 00:16:54,432
but I'm not gonna start
college in the fall.
370
00:16:55,199 --> 00:16:58,104
That's okay, Buddy.
Whatever you need.
371
00:17:00,504 --> 00:17:02,838
Mom, we can all see that your
head is about to explode,
372
00:17:02,874 --> 00:17:04,374
so why don't you just say it?
373
00:17:04,410 --> 00:17:05,844
No.
374
00:17:07,111 --> 00:17:08,878
I have nothing to say.
375
00:17:08,914 --> 00:17:10,523
I have so much to say.
376
00:17:10,547 --> 00:17:12,681
I don't even know
where to start.
377
00:17:12,717 --> 00:17:14,982
This is Brady. This is not
a kid who self-motivates.
378
00:17:15,018 --> 00:17:18,753
And Steve is just sitting
there like it's totally chill
379
00:17:18,789 --> 00:17:21,556
that our son has decided
to completely skip college.
380
00:17:21,592 --> 00:17:23,424
Well, why didn't
you say anything?
381
00:17:23,460 --> 00:17:27,196
Because I blew us up
and we all know it.
382
00:17:27,232 --> 00:17:30,866
It's the silent agreement
Steve and I co-signed.
383
00:17:30,902 --> 00:17:33,167
He's not allowed to
punch me in the face,
384
00:17:33,203 --> 00:17:36,371
and I'm not allowed to take up
any more space than the couch.
385
00:17:36,407 --> 00:17:38,506
- Sounds healthy to me.
- Yeah, right.
386
00:17:38,542 --> 00:17:40,575
- Carrie: Welcome home!
- Miranda: Welcome home!
387
00:17:40,611 --> 00:17:44,712
Oh, hi, Lyle! I-I didn't
know you'd still be here.
388
00:17:44,748 --> 00:17:47,215
- I-It's nice to see you again.
- Yeah, you, too. Come on in.
389
00:17:47,251 --> 00:17:49,384
- Oh, great, thanks.
- Che: Hey!
390
00:17:49,420 --> 00:17:52,688
- Hey!
- Welcome to page 42 of the Ikea catalog!
391
00:17:52,724 --> 00:17:54,890
What? Nice!
392
00:17:54,926 --> 00:17:56,926
Now where do I get
the Swedish meatballs?
393
00:17:56,962 --> 00:18:00,195
- Come here.
- Oh, my gosh. Oh!
394
00:18:01,499 --> 00:18:05,133
I have to say, Che with
an elevator is even hotter
395
00:18:05,169 --> 00:18:07,202
than Che in a
five-flight walk-up.
396
00:18:07,238 --> 00:18:10,205
Oh, and if my TV show goes...
397
00:18:10,241 --> 00:18:12,741
- When your TV show goes.
- Thank you for that.
398
00:18:12,777 --> 00:18:14,943
And I'm taping in LA,
I will have no problem
399
00:18:14,979 --> 00:18:17,479
subletting it for
more than I pay.
400
00:18:17,515 --> 00:18:20,147
Now, I'm part of the problem.
401
00:18:21,387 --> 00:18:22,388
Che: Mm.
402
00:18:25,690 --> 00:18:27,289
Hi, I'm Carrie.
403
00:18:27,325 --> 00:18:30,758
I keep waiting for
someone to introduce us.
404
00:18:30,794 --> 00:18:32,394
Same here.
405
00:18:32,429 --> 00:18:36,632
Shit. Lyle, this is Carrie.
Carrie, this is Lyle.
406
00:18:36,668 --> 00:18:38,100
- Hi.
- Hi. Nice to meet you.
407
00:18:38,136 --> 00:18:39,479
- Likewise.
- All right, I'll take that.
408
00:18:39,503 --> 00:18:41,502
- I'm the designated bartender.
- Oh... Oh, okay.
409
00:18:41,538 --> 00:18:44,406
Lyle is a mixologist at
the Malibu Soho House.
410
00:18:44,442 --> 00:18:46,308
That's right, but lower
your expectations.
411
00:18:46,344 --> 00:18:49,978
'Cause Che has no fancy
glassware. Or any glassware.
412
00:18:50,014 --> 00:18:51,847
Hey, show me the bedroom.
413
00:18:51,883 --> 00:18:54,516
Oh! Okay.
414
00:18:54,552 --> 00:18:57,822
But just show her. I'm
only here for one drink.
415
00:18:58,355 --> 00:19:00,059
Loud and clear.
416
00:19:01,993 --> 00:19:04,693
So... Carrie,
what's your story?
417
00:19:04,729 --> 00:19:07,929
Let's see. What is my story?
418
00:19:07,965 --> 00:19:10,265
Well, as I mentioned, I'm
only here for one drink,
419
00:19:10,301 --> 00:19:11,700
and I'd much rather
talk about you,
420
00:19:11,736 --> 00:19:15,470
a gentleman wearing a ring
on every single finger.
421
00:19:15,506 --> 00:19:18,777
What,
pray-tell, is your story?
422
00:19:19,344 --> 00:19:21,376
- Well, I was married to Che for two years.
- Mm!
423
00:19:21,412 --> 00:19:23,156
So, that's a short story.
424
00:19:23,180 --> 00:19:24,512
And the rings are a holdover
425
00:19:24,548 --> 00:19:27,349
from my Beverly Hills
hairdressing days.
426
00:19:27,385 --> 00:19:31,553
- A Beverly Hills hairdresser.
- Mm-hmm.
427
00:19:31,589 --> 00:19:35,858
Perhaps, I'll be staying for more than just one drink.
428
00:19:35,894 --> 00:19:38,897
Oh... I just...
429
00:19:40,231 --> 00:19:43,565
I guess I didn't think that
Lyle would still be here.
430
00:19:43,601 --> 00:19:46,001
Mm, did you think he'd
drive me in his truck
431
00:19:46,037 --> 00:19:47,669
all the way from
LA to Hudson Yards,
432
00:19:47,705 --> 00:19:50,333
load up all my new
shit from Ikea,
433
00:19:50,369 --> 00:19:53,575
swing by my
old place, get my clothes,
434
00:19:53,611 --> 00:19:56,045
turn around and drive
3,000 miles back?
435
00:19:56,081 --> 00:19:58,213
Oh,
shit, that was loud.
436
00:19:58,249 --> 00:20:02,317
Okay... I guess when
you put it that way.
437
00:20:02,353 --> 00:20:06,154
I just... I just
miss being with you.
438
00:20:06,190 --> 00:20:07,889
So much.
439
00:20:07,925 --> 00:20:11,026
Me too... Me too.
440
00:20:11,062 --> 00:20:12,897
He'll be sleeping on the couch.
441
00:20:13,297 --> 00:20:14,530
- Okay.
- Okay.
442
00:20:14,566 --> 00:20:16,197
- Cameron Diaz...
- Mm.
443
00:20:16,233 --> 00:20:18,266
- Eva Longoria, Che Diaz...
- Wow.
444
00:20:18,302 --> 00:20:20,668
- Before they were Che.
- Really?
445
00:20:20,704 --> 00:20:24,206
Oh, yeah, yeah. This was,
uh, this was in 2010.
446
00:20:24,242 --> 00:20:26,874
Che was in LA to tape "Funny
Latina Ladies" for Showtime.
447
00:20:26,910 --> 00:20:30,746
And an agent
told them to lose the long, flowing
448
00:20:30,782 --> 00:20:33,115
- Carrie Underwood hair.
- Oh, my God.
449
00:20:33,151 --> 00:20:36,017
Mm-hmm. So, Che came in...
450
00:20:36,053 --> 00:20:40,689
- Mm-hmm.
- I gave them a sexy shag, and then... we shagged.
451
00:20:40,725 --> 00:20:44,626
- It's very "Shampoo" of you.
- Mm, total compliment.
452
00:20:44,662 --> 00:20:48,797
Anyway, Che got cut from the
special and blamed the new haircut,
453
00:20:48,833 --> 00:20:50,966
so the least I could
do was marry them.
454
00:20:51,002 --> 00:20:52,301
Yep.
455
00:20:52,337 --> 00:20:53,572
- Oh, shit!
- Oh!
456
00:20:53,972 --> 00:20:55,741
Oh, shit.
457
00:20:57,443 --> 00:20:58,540
Che: Oh.
458
00:20:58,576 --> 00:21:00,308
We broke your couch.
459
00:21:00,344 --> 00:21:02,911
It's the
side you screwed in, man.
460
00:21:02,947 --> 00:21:05,880
Carrie: Happy Housewarming!
461
00:21:05,916 --> 00:21:08,917
- There you are.
- Happy anniversary, my love.
462
00:21:08,953 --> 00:21:10,385
Happy anniversary, baby.
463
00:21:10,421 --> 00:21:13,721
- Hi! So sorry we're late.
- We were workin' out.
464
00:21:13,757 --> 00:21:16,291
- Is that what we're callin' it now?
- It's not what you think.
465
00:21:16,327 --> 00:21:18,293
Lisa: Well... you're
not late at all.
466
00:21:18,329 --> 00:21:20,162
You're actually the
first to arrive.
467
00:21:20,198 --> 00:21:22,898
- Oh.
- Do I not exist?
468
00:21:22,934 --> 00:21:24,833
Oh, I am so sorry,
Mother Wexley.
469
00:21:24,869 --> 00:21:27,635
Yes, you were
punctual, as always.
470
00:21:27,671 --> 00:21:29,804
Uh, Harry, they have got a
beautiful whiskey over here.
471
00:21:29,840 --> 00:21:32,043
- I know you're gonna love it.
- Excellent.
472
00:21:32,643 --> 00:21:35,744
Oh, wow! Everything
looks so beautiful.
473
00:21:35,780 --> 00:21:38,680
- Did you rent out the whole place?
- Lisa: Yes.
474
00:21:38,716 --> 00:21:41,516
Is that Mark Kasabian?
Do you know him?
475
00:21:41,552 --> 00:21:43,853
Yes, he sold me the Amy Sherald
476
00:21:43,889 --> 00:21:45,453
and then a few other paintings.
477
00:21:45,489 --> 00:21:47,455
Hello! Happy anniversary!
478
00:21:47,491 --> 00:21:48,856
- Sorry, I'm late.
- Lisa: Aw!
479
00:21:48,892 --> 00:21:52,527
The Jim Stall Installation
needed a little extra TLC.
480
00:21:52,563 --> 00:21:56,431
- Hello. Mark Kasabian.
- Hi. I am Charlotte York Goldenblatt.
481
00:21:56,467 --> 00:21:58,867
I have been to your
gallery countless times.
482
00:21:58,903 --> 00:22:00,368
It's a pleasure to meet you.
483
00:22:00,404 --> 00:22:02,604
And you're not late,
Mark, we just started.
484
00:22:02,640 --> 00:22:04,539
Oh, but, uh, didn't
you say 7:30?
485
00:22:04,575 --> 00:22:06,975
Yes. I guess everyone
is stuck in traffic?
486
00:22:07,011 --> 00:22:09,177
Well, I've been
here since 7:15
487
00:22:09,213 --> 00:22:12,251
and not so much as
an hors d'oeuvre.
488
00:22:12,651 --> 00:22:15,050
Okay, why don't we all go in?
489
00:22:15,086 --> 00:22:17,385
How did I
ever make it 20 years?
490
00:22:17,421 --> 00:22:19,187
♪ At last ♪
491
00:22:19,223 --> 00:22:21,660
Oh, Daddy, I'm so
happy you came.
492
00:22:22,259 --> 00:22:28,063
Darling, this looks like it has
the makings of a magical evening.
493
00:22:28,099 --> 00:22:31,867
You've approached me with
that same hors d'oeuvre
494
00:22:31,903 --> 00:22:34,737
for the second time so far.
495
00:22:34,773 --> 00:22:36,839
Spoke too soon.
496
00:22:36,875 --> 00:22:38,708
Harry... I'd like
to think that
497
00:22:38,744 --> 00:22:40,675
we're more than
just "dad" friends.
498
00:22:40,711 --> 00:22:42,511
Oh, that's nice 'cause
I feel the same way.
499
00:22:42,547 --> 00:22:45,080
I-I think of us as
"friend" friends.
500
00:22:45,116 --> 00:22:48,050
Good... That's why I sat
you next to my mother.
501
00:22:48,086 --> 00:22:49,852
You seem so familiar to me.
502
00:22:49,888 --> 00:22:52,154
Well, I used to work
at the Wickham Gallery,
503
00:22:52,190 --> 00:22:53,821
back when Banks
Thurlow owned it.
504
00:22:53,857 --> 00:22:57,525
Wait, a-are you the young girl
who discovered Sonya Sklaroff,
505
00:22:57,561 --> 00:22:59,923
- right out of RISD?
- That was me.
506
00:22:59,959 --> 00:23:01,897
Yes, I used to be her.
507
00:23:01,933 --> 00:23:03,764
I can't believe
you remember that.
508
00:23:03,800 --> 00:23:06,101
I always remember
memorable people.
509
00:23:06,137 --> 00:23:08,236
- Ha!
- Happy anniversary.
510
00:23:08,272 --> 00:23:10,773
Thank you. Harry, this is
511
00:23:10,809 --> 00:23:13,875
Lisa's father,
Mr. Lawrence Todd.
512
00:23:13,911 --> 00:23:16,511
He is a renowned
playwright and poet,
513
00:23:16,547 --> 00:23:18,180
and founder of the
Newark Free Theater.
514
00:23:18,216 --> 00:23:20,515
No kiddin'. That's
very impressive.
515
00:23:20,551 --> 00:23:22,184
Are you like my son-in-law here,
516
00:23:22,220 --> 00:23:24,853
who's a highly paid centurion
517
00:23:24,889 --> 00:23:27,089
to the great god of Wall Street?
518
00:23:27,125 --> 00:23:28,451
Eh, not exactly.
519
00:23:28,487 --> 00:23:31,026
I'm more involved in the
re-distribution of wealth.
520
00:23:31,062 --> 00:23:32,639
I'm a divorce lawyer.
521
00:23:32,663 --> 00:23:35,598
So, I guess it's all
lawyers and bankers tonight,
522
00:23:35,634 --> 00:23:37,265
as I feared.
523
00:23:37,301 --> 00:23:39,801
Honey, I just texted Susan
to see how close they were,
524
00:23:39,837 --> 00:23:43,571
and she just wrote back, “What are
you talking about? We're in Capri.”
525
00:23:43,607 --> 00:23:45,774
I mean, surely you were
tracking the RSVPs, right?
526
00:23:45,810 --> 00:23:49,015
- On the Paperless Post?
- I think so... Hang on.
527
00:23:51,116 --> 00:23:54,320
Um... I think I
see the problem.
528
00:23:54,747 --> 00:23:57,151
And?
529
00:23:57,187 --> 00:24:00,026
-I never hit send.
-What do you mean? You never hit send on what?
530
00:24:00,959 --> 00:24:03,462
The invitations?! Herbert!
531
00:24:04,496 --> 00:24:07,829
So... hello.
532
00:24:07,865 --> 00:24:10,998
We, uh, we wanted to
keep you up to speed on,
533
00:24:11,034 --> 00:24:14,001
uh, this, uh, situation
that we find ourselves in.
534
00:24:14,037 --> 00:24:17,839
- Honey, would you...
- Herbert forgot to hit send on the invitations.
535
00:24:17,875 --> 00:24:20,242
So, all of you who
are actually here
536
00:24:20,278 --> 00:24:22,744
were invited the
old-fashioned way, by talking.
537
00:24:22,780 --> 00:24:26,142
Everyone else is in Europe
or the Hamptons by now.
538
00:24:26,178 --> 00:24:27,915
So, I hope you're hungry
539
00:24:27,951 --> 00:24:32,087
because we have a four-course
meal coming for 31 people.
540
00:24:32,123 --> 00:24:34,125
- Oh, my God.
- Herbert: And, uh...
541
00:24:34,792 --> 00:24:36,395
and oysters don't
keep.
542
00:24:37,529 --> 00:24:38,627
Okay, full disclosure.
543
00:24:38,663 --> 00:24:39,995
I was planning to stop in
544
00:24:40,031 --> 00:24:42,497
for a quick drink
and then take off...
545
00:24:42,533 --> 00:24:45,500
but now it feels too
awkward to leave.
546
00:24:45,536 --> 00:24:47,706
Oh, no, you can't leave now.
547
00:24:48,206 --> 00:24:51,205
- Oh, no. We took our wedding very seriously.
- Lyle: Mm-hmm.
548
00:24:51,241 --> 00:24:55,143
We were married in Vegas by an Elvis impersonator...
549
00:24:55,179 --> 00:24:58,647
both of us dressed as Elvis.
550
00:24:58,683 --> 00:25:01,483
Oh... Jannie was
dressed as Priscilla.
551
00:25:01,519 --> 00:25:03,384
- Oh, Jannie.
- Jannie.
552
00:25:03,420 --> 00:25:06,489
- Who's Jannie?
- Jannie was, kind of, our girlfriend
553
00:25:06,525 --> 00:25:07,823
for a few months.
554
00:25:07,859 --> 00:25:09,490
Yeah, we were poly-pioneers.
555
00:25:09,526 --> 00:25:11,526
- Uh-huh.
- Miranda: Meanwhile, I was cutting up
556
00:25:11,562 --> 00:25:14,196
carrot sticks for
Brady's lunchbox.
557
00:25:16,601 --> 00:25:18,633
- Carrie, I know what you're thinking.
- Hm?
558
00:25:18,669 --> 00:25:21,136
Really? 'Cause
I'm not even sure.
559
00:25:21,172 --> 00:25:23,704
This wasn't some pervy,
straight guy idea.
560
00:25:23,740 --> 00:25:25,580
In fact, I wasn't even
down with this at first,
561
00:25:25,611 --> 00:25:26,976
but young Che over here
562
00:25:27,012 --> 00:25:28,643
wanted to break out
of the old norms.
563
00:25:28,679 --> 00:25:31,046
- Hello?! Not just me.
- Lyle: Mm-hmm.
564
00:25:31,082 --> 00:25:33,148
Lyle: It was totally just you.
565
00:25:33,184 --> 00:25:35,150
You said, you said it
was important for us
566
00:25:35,186 --> 00:25:37,819
- to push our relationship boundaries, right?
- Ah.
567
00:25:37,855 --> 00:25:41,223
And, and, and, and if I was
afraid to explore that...
568
00:25:41,259 --> 00:25:44,359
I wasn't for you, so
I figured, well...
569
00:25:44,395 --> 00:25:46,161
"happy life, happy wife."
570
00:25:46,197 --> 00:25:49,568
- Marriage takes sacrifice.
- Lyle: Speaking of sacrifice...
571
00:25:50,768 --> 00:25:53,202
Jannie was my first pegging.
572
00:25:53,238 --> 00:25:55,703
- Well, look at the time.
- Oh, I guess that's not
573
00:25:55,739 --> 00:25:57,672
- ice-breaker conversation.
- Oh, shit.
574
00:25:57,708 --> 00:26:00,042
Is my first strap-on
experience off the table?
575
00:26:00,078 --> 00:26:02,210
- Che/Lyle: Aww.
- You know, I still don't know
576
00:26:02,246 --> 00:26:04,913
how I feel about the first
time I wore a strap-on.
577
00:26:04,949 --> 00:26:06,381
How am I still in this room?
578
00:26:06,417 --> 00:26:10,018
Oh,
okay. We'll walk ya out.
579
00:26:10,054 --> 00:26:11,754
- Lobster, sir?
- More lobster?
580
00:26:11,790 --> 00:26:12,655
Charlotte: Hello.
581
00:26:12,691 --> 00:26:14,022
Herbert: Oh, more lobster!
582
00:26:14,058 --> 00:26:15,703
- Eat up, everyone.
- No, no thank you.
583
00:26:15,727 --> 00:26:17,793
There's, uh, lots more of it.
584
00:26:17,829 --> 00:26:19,094
Mother...
585
00:26:19,130 --> 00:26:21,796
wouldn't you like to come
down here and join us?
586
00:26:21,832 --> 00:26:26,805
This was the only seat without the
air conditioning blasting on it.
587
00:26:27,571 --> 00:26:29,399
Honey, go back and
keep her company.
588
00:26:29,435 --> 00:26:31,440
Yeah, I feel like I did my time.
589
00:26:31,476 --> 00:26:33,145
Waiter: More lobster, sir?
590
00:26:35,914 --> 00:26:37,112
Thank you.
591
00:26:37,148 --> 00:26:39,881
Texting at the
table. I-I apologize.
592
00:26:39,917 --> 00:26:41,917
Well, if you weren't so nice,
593
00:26:41,953 --> 00:26:44,656
you would be home by
now, so I'll allow it.
594
00:26:44,922 --> 00:26:48,089
My 10-year-old found a way to
smuggle her cell phone into camp
595
00:26:48,125 --> 00:26:50,337
- and she's torturing me nonstop...
- Waiter: Another lobster, sir.
596
00:26:50,361 --> 00:26:52,227
Begging to be picked up.
597
00:26:52,263 --> 00:26:55,430
Oh, both my kids were homesick
first time at sleepaway camp.
598
00:26:55,466 --> 00:26:57,665
Yours will adjust, I promise.
599
00:26:57,701 --> 00:27:01,136
Madness. This is Delilah again!
600
00:27:01,172 --> 00:27:03,773
Oh, don't answer it.
In fact, give it to me.
601
00:27:03,809 --> 00:27:05,574
- Excuse me?
- I'm serious.
602
00:27:05,610 --> 00:27:07,955
- If they smell weakness, they are like bloodhounds...
- Dad.
603
00:27:07,979 --> 00:27:10,012
And they will go
in for the kill.
604
00:27:10,048 --> 00:27:12,216
Give me the phone.
605
00:27:12,716 --> 00:27:16,318
I'd like to make a toast to
my beautiful daughter, Lisa,
606
00:27:16,354 --> 00:27:20,089
and her magnificent film
that I've just been told
607
00:27:20,125 --> 00:27:25,026
is in the Tribeca Film
Festival!
608
00:27:25,062 --> 00:27:27,128
He does know it's our
anniversary, right?
609
00:27:27,164 --> 00:27:29,309
Lisa:
Thank you, Daddy. Cheers!
610
00:27:29,333 --> 00:27:31,503
- Happy news!
- Hear, hear.
611
00:27:32,537 --> 00:27:35,170
Shit!
612
00:27:35,206 --> 00:27:36,241
Fuck.
613
00:27:36,808 --> 00:27:38,309
Well, I guess he was exhausted.
614
00:27:39,175 --> 00:27:41,609
Miranda: Could you wake him
up and move him to the couch?
615
00:27:41,645 --> 00:27:44,647
The broken couch?
616
00:27:44,683 --> 00:27:45,881
He sleeps like a dead man.
617
00:27:45,917 --> 00:27:47,549
And, honestly, I am so tired.
618
00:27:47,585 --> 00:27:49,253
I'm gonna pass out, too.
619
00:27:50,020 --> 00:27:53,523
- Ugh.
- You're gonna make it up to me tomorrow.
620
00:27:53,559 --> 00:27:54,560
Okay.
621
00:27:57,162 --> 00:27:59,765
Ugh. Oh, God.
622
00:28:00,431 --> 00:28:04,499
So, Delilah's mother, my third
ex-wife, had a mid-life crisis.
623
00:28:04,535 --> 00:28:08,337
- I guess it was all too much for her.
- Well, there are very few
624
00:28:08,373 --> 00:28:10,165
Lisa Todd Wexleys in the world,
625
00:28:10,201 --> 00:28:12,419
- who can juggle everything so gracefully.
- We have 31 buffers between 'em.
626
00:28:12,443 --> 00:28:15,344
And look at her now,
getting back to her passion.
627
00:28:15,380 --> 00:28:16,515
Waiter: More wine, ma'am?
628
00:28:17,783 --> 00:28:19,815
Why don't you follow her lead?
629
00:28:19,851 --> 00:28:21,250
Come work for me.
630
00:28:21,286 --> 00:28:24,385
- If only.
- No, I-I'm, I'm being serious.
631
00:28:24,421 --> 00:28:26,521
I would love to invite someone
632
00:28:26,557 --> 00:28:28,758
with your taste and tenacity
633
00:28:28,794 --> 00:28:30,425
into my gallery.
And I promise,
634
00:28:30,461 --> 00:28:33,932
it's not only to rip the phone
out of my hand occasionally.
635
00:28:34,699 --> 00:28:35,701
Oh, d...
636
00:28:37,201 --> 00:28:40,035
It-It's been so long and, and...
637
00:28:40,071 --> 00:28:42,738
my kids need me even
more these days.
638
00:28:42,774 --> 00:28:43,770
But...
639
00:28:44,942 --> 00:28:49,177
you've really made my
night by asking me.
640
00:28:49,213 --> 00:28:51,817
If you ever change your
mind, you know where I am.
641
00:28:53,712 --> 00:28:57,785
Okay... I think it's
safe to leave now.
642
00:28:57,821 --> 00:29:01,923
Hey, uh, everyone, uh,
uh, dessert's comin' up.
643
00:29:01,959 --> 00:29:04,425
Uh, save room,
there's lots of it.
644
00:29:04,461 --> 00:29:08,263
Lisa: Yes, in fact, this
is a very special dessert
645
00:29:08,299 --> 00:29:10,531
from our first date
646
00:29:10,567 --> 00:29:13,305
- when you took me for coffee and cake...
- Oh, yeah.
647
00:29:13,939 --> 00:29:15,368
Oh, my God.
648
00:29:15,901 --> 00:29:18,206
- What?
- Oh, my God, I forgot to order the cake.
649
00:29:18,242 --> 00:29:19,774
Herbert: What?!
650
00:29:19,810 --> 00:29:23,879
Lisa, did you say you
forgot to order the cake?
651
00:29:23,915 --> 00:29:27,315
Yes! Yes, I did. I'm so sorry.
652
00:29:27,351 --> 00:29:29,250
Well, I'm stuffed.
653
00:29:29,286 --> 00:29:31,152
Maybe it's a blessin'
in disguise, right?
654
00:29:31,188 --> 00:29:33,749
Eunice: Well, if I
understand you correctly,
655
00:29:33,785 --> 00:29:36,558
you didn't send out
the proper invitations
656
00:29:36,594 --> 00:29:39,097
because you were
working so much.
657
00:29:39,597 --> 00:29:43,465
And then, you forgot
to order the cake.
658
00:29:43,501 --> 00:29:47,503
Shall I tell you why I never
forgot to order the cake?
659
00:29:47,539 --> 00:29:49,638
Mother, please.
660
00:29:49,674 --> 00:29:52,474
Because I baked them all myself
661
00:29:52,510 --> 00:29:54,343
and I was happy to do it.
662
00:29:54,379 --> 00:29:57,773
It helped my husband's
business to flourish.
663
00:29:57,809 --> 00:30:00,282
Yeah, well, things are
a little different now.
664
00:30:00,318 --> 00:30:01,850
I have my own career.
665
00:30:01,886 --> 00:30:06,321
And I had mine. I was
a concert pianist,
666
00:30:06,357 --> 00:30:10,525
but when I became a mother,
my priorities changed.
667
00:30:10,561 --> 00:30:11,538
May I have my
phone back, please?
668
00:30:11,562 --> 00:30:13,028
Lawrence Todd:
Well, Mrs. Wexley,
669
00:30:13,064 --> 00:30:16,198
just because you let
your dream wither away
670
00:30:16,234 --> 00:30:19,267
doesn't mean that
my daughter has to.
671
00:30:19,303 --> 00:30:21,937
Lisa Todd is an artist.
672
00:30:21,973 --> 00:30:26,608
She's putting beauty and
ideas into the world,
673
00:30:26,644 --> 00:30:31,614
rather than just praying
to the almighty dollar...
674
00:30:31,650 --> 00:30:33,282
like your son here.
675
00:30:33,318 --> 00:30:34,528
Thank you for the
compliment, Daddy,
676
00:30:34,552 --> 00:30:36,646
but Herbert is concerned
with lots of things
677
00:30:36,682 --> 00:30:38,153
that have nothing
to do with money.
678
00:30:38,189 --> 00:30:40,226
Really? Could've fooled me.
679
00:30:40,826 --> 00:30:43,225
Name one project
that he's working on
680
00:30:43,261 --> 00:30:46,032
that doesn't revolve
around profit.
681
00:30:46,598 --> 00:30:48,464
Um...
682
00:30:48,500 --> 00:30:50,102
I rest my case.
683
00:30:54,071 --> 00:30:56,905
Herbert is running
for City Comptroller.
684
00:30:56,941 --> 00:30:59,007
- He is?!
- He is?
685
00:30:59,043 --> 00:31:02,678
- I am?
- Yes! He wants to give back.
686
00:31:02,714 --> 00:31:07,152
And I support his decision 100%.
687
00:31:07,686 --> 00:31:10,753
- Hear, hear!
- All: Cheers!
688
00:31:10,789 --> 00:31:12,558
Can I come back down there now?
689
00:31:37,983 --> 00:31:40,281
Are we
really doing this?
690
00:31:40,317 --> 00:31:42,684
I-I feel like my
freshman-year roommate
691
00:31:42,720 --> 00:31:45,721
who used to have sex while I was
three feet away in the next bed.
692
00:31:47,459 --> 00:31:48,460
Yeah.
693
00:31:52,096 --> 00:31:54,333
Okay.
694
00:31:58,503 --> 00:32:00,739
Oh, yeah.
695
00:32:28,432 --> 00:32:30,369
Are you okay with this?
696
00:32:34,005 --> 00:32:35,136
Thank you for asking.
697
00:32:35,172 --> 00:32:36,650
I need to think about
this for a minute
698
00:32:36,674 --> 00:32:39,341
because my visceral
reaction is "no,"
699
00:32:39,377 --> 00:32:41,276
but maybe that's just
fear of the unknown.
700
00:32:41,312 --> 00:32:45,113
Because, I mean, how will I
ever know unless I try it?
701
00:32:45,149 --> 00:32:47,349
We're all here.
It's kinda hot.
702
00:32:47,385 --> 00:32:49,821
It's getting less hot
the more you talk.
703
00:32:58,395 --> 00:33:00,399
Che: Ooh, is that a yes?
704
00:33:02,201 --> 00:33:03,202
Yes.
705
00:33:13,177 --> 00:33:14,913
Oh, yeah.
706
00:33:47,077 --> 00:33:50,178
- Ow, ow, ow! Charley horse! Ow!
- Oh! No, no, no!
707
00:33:50,214 --> 00:33:52,993
- Ow, ow, ow! Oh, that's bad!
- What's wrong, what's wrong, what's wrong?!
708
00:33:53,017 --> 00:33:56,886
Um... ow...
709
00:33:56,922 --> 00:33:58,157
I just...
710
00:33:58,757 --> 00:34:01,189
You know what,
guys?
711
00:34:01,225 --> 00:34:03,859
This just isn't me,
so just, just...
712
00:34:03,895 --> 00:34:06,494
You should... you
should carry on.
713
00:34:06,530 --> 00:34:09,698
Seriously, I'm, I'm,
I'm, I'm good with it.
714
00:34:09,734 --> 00:34:12,337
Ow! Fuck! Ow.
715
00:34:12,570 --> 00:34:14,073
Fucking hell. Ow.
716
00:34:36,961 --> 00:34:38,163
Hey...
717
00:34:38,663 --> 00:34:41,167
you really didn't have
to stop. I meant that.
718
00:34:42,233 --> 00:34:45,071
Oh, I know...
but I missed you.
719
00:34:46,971 --> 00:34:48,407
Aww.
720
00:34:50,008 --> 00:34:52,140
Oh, God.
721
00:34:56,682 --> 00:35:00,686
There we go. Yeah.
722
00:35:02,153 --> 00:35:03,355
Both: Oh!
723
00:35:08,124 --> 00:35:13,062
If you're calling to ask to be my
wing-man at "Vivante!" the answer is yes.
724
00:35:13,098 --> 00:35:14,496
Oh, no, I couldn't come to that.
725
00:35:14,532 --> 00:35:17,265
You know what they say,
never meet your heroes.
726
00:35:17,301 --> 00:35:20,970
Do they also say, "Never ask
your old boss to plug your book?"
727
00:35:21,006 --> 00:35:22,675
Because, um...
728
00:35:23,441 --> 00:35:25,773
I might not be brave enough
to pull that off today.
729
00:35:25,809 --> 00:35:28,155
Seema : Okay, that's
why I called. I sensed you'd cave.
730
00:35:28,179 --> 00:35:31,312
Carrie, don't be afraid
to be transactional.
731
00:35:31,348 --> 00:35:34,249
Enid's a work-contact,
not a gal-pal.
732
00:35:34,285 --> 00:35:36,418
- Uh, I'll do what I can.
- Do more.
733
00:35:36,454 --> 00:35:37,765
You need this for
your book sales.
734
00:35:37,789 --> 00:35:39,588
And just don't get in any photo
735
00:35:39,624 --> 00:35:40,655
near women with walkers.
736
00:35:40,691 --> 00:35:42,458
That'd be a
brand-killer for you.
737
00:35:42,494 --> 00:35:43,695
Let's go, Rocco.
738
00:35:44,896 --> 00:35:46,761
- Hello. Hello.
- Welcome.
739
00:35:46,797 --> 00:35:48,598
Hi. Can we get a photo
of you three ladies?
740
00:35:48,634 --> 00:35:49,765
Oh, I... N...
741
00:35:49,801 --> 00:35:50,978
- D... Oh, uh...
- Sheila: Yes.
742
00:35:51,002 --> 00:35:52,334
Oh, no, I don't wanna...
743
00:35:52,370 --> 00:35:54,035
My hair is so... No, no, no.
744
00:35:54,071 --> 00:35:55,504
Thank you, but thank you.
745
00:36:01,012 --> 00:36:02,048
Oh.
746
00:36:02,348 --> 00:36:03,581
Can I, um...
747
00:36:03,848 --> 00:36:05,047
Do you need any help?
748
00:36:05,083 --> 00:36:07,319
Do I look like I need help?
749
00:36:08,419 --> 00:36:09,850
Kinda.
750
00:36:09,886 --> 00:36:12,721
So, tell me when you need
me to do the thing, okay?
751
00:36:12,757 --> 00:36:14,189
- Okay.
- Okay. All right.
752
00:36:14,225 --> 00:36:15,369
- That's Gloria Steinem.
- Oh, my gosh!
753
00:36:15,393 --> 00:36:16,859
Hello, hello, hello.
754
00:36:16,895 --> 00:36:18,393
- Oh!
- Hi, how are you?
755
00:36:18,429 --> 00:36:19,999
Guest: That was
Gloria Steinem!
756
00:36:21,266 --> 00:36:23,231
- Enid, hi.
- Hi.
757
00:36:23,267 --> 00:36:27,969
- Thank you for including me.
- Well, when I got the idea for "Vivante!"
758
00:36:28,005 --> 00:36:31,040
the first name that I thought
of was Carrie Bradshaw.
759
00:36:31,076 --> 00:36:34,509
And, um... Oh, hello.
760
00:36:34,545 --> 00:36:37,412
- That's Jane Rosen.
- Money.
761
00:36:37,448 --> 00:36:40,210
Uh, I should say hello.
You and I will talk later.
762
00:36:40,246 --> 00:36:42,846
Oh, great! And, and
because just to circle back
763
00:36:42,882 --> 00:36:45,153
to our earlier conversation,
764
00:36:45,189 --> 00:36:46,655
the one that we were,
765
00:36:46,691 --> 00:36:48,490
you know, having at
breakfast the other day...
766
00:36:48,526 --> 00:36:50,691
Carrie! Carrie, hello!
767
00:36:50,727 --> 00:36:53,362
- Oy.
- Oh, you know Bitsy von Muffling?
768
00:36:53,398 --> 00:36:55,596
- Just tangentially, through my boyfriend.
- Mm.
769
00:36:55,632 --> 00:36:57,733
She's only here 'cause
she has deep pockets.
770
00:36:57,769 --> 00:37:01,036
- Oh.
- Oh, my God.
771
00:37:01,072 --> 00:37:02,838
- Hi.
- I don't know what this afternoon
772
00:37:02,874 --> 00:37:05,207
is gonna cost me,
but it's worth it.
773
00:37:05,243 --> 00:37:07,370
Gloria Steinem!
774
00:37:07,406 --> 00:37:09,444
-Oh, I saw her. She walked past me.
-Oh, I know!
775
00:37:09,480 --> 00:37:12,213
- You look very pink. Pretty...
- You... Well, thank you.
776
00:37:12,249 --> 00:37:14,194
- Excuse me, everyone.
- Carrie: Oh, oh, oh.
777
00:37:14,218 --> 00:37:15,884
Enid: Ladies, welcome.
778
00:37:15,920 --> 00:37:18,786
I think this might be
the greatest gathering
779
00:37:18,822 --> 00:37:21,790
of female minds since
Eleanor Roosevelt
780
00:37:21,826 --> 00:37:23,859
had dinner alone
at the White House.
781
00:37:25,763 --> 00:37:28,797
Which we know she did often
because she wasn't a lot of fun.
782
00:37:28,833 --> 00:37:33,601
Let's get
seated so we can begin.
783
00:37:33,637 --> 00:37:38,844
So, what do you think
of Marlon Schaffer?
784
00:37:40,678 --> 00:37:44,580
Oh. Oh, are y... You're
the little birdie?
785
00:37:44,616 --> 00:37:46,581
- Tweet-tweet.
- Oh.
786
00:37:46,617 --> 00:37:50,753
Well, ever since I
saw you so, so sad
787
00:37:50,789 --> 00:37:53,122
in the nail salon that day,
788
00:37:53,158 --> 00:37:56,195
I wanted to do whatever
I could to cheer you up.
789
00:37:56,628 --> 00:37:58,326
Isn't he wonderful?
790
00:37:58,362 --> 00:38:00,595
Oh, I-I don't...
791
00:38:00,631 --> 00:38:04,732
He doesn't exactly
seem right for me.
792
00:38:04,768 --> 00:38:07,135
Don't let the Albany
area code throw you.
793
00:38:07,171 --> 00:38:09,138
He also has a place in town.
794
00:38:09,174 --> 00:38:11,339
- Okay.
- And, Carrie, trust me,
795
00:38:11,375 --> 00:38:15,176
the best way to get over someone
is to get under someone else.
796
00:38:15,212 --> 00:38:17,812
You know, maybe I should
give this prime seat to...
797
00:38:17,848 --> 00:38:21,283
And if you're going to get under
someone, it should be Marlon.
798
00:38:21,319 --> 00:38:23,351
The best sex I've
had since Bobby.
799
00:38:23,387 --> 00:38:27,188
I mean, of course, no one could
please me in bed like my Bobby.
800
00:38:27,224 --> 00:38:29,757
Oh, so attentive to my needs.
801
00:38:29,793 --> 00:38:32,795
Mr. Broadway loved
his lady.
802
00:38:32,831 --> 00:38:35,597
My head is spinning.
803
00:38:35,633 --> 00:38:39,367
I was always under the
impression that Bobby was gay.
804
00:38:39,403 --> 00:38:42,103
He was! That's why
he tried so hard.
805
00:38:42,139 --> 00:38:43,439
- Oh.
- You know me.
806
00:38:43,475 --> 00:38:45,273
I love a challenge.
807
00:38:45,309 --> 00:38:47,675
Clearly unfinished business
with my father. Hm.
808
00:38:47,711 --> 00:38:50,545
Oh, Bitsy, I so appreciate
it, really, I do,
809
00:38:50,581 --> 00:38:53,281
but I'm, I-I'm, I'm
doing much better.
810
00:38:53,317 --> 00:38:54,949
Don't be hasty!
811
00:38:54,985 --> 00:38:58,353
Ladies around town call
Marlon "the human tripod"
812
00:38:58,389 --> 00:39:01,393
'cause it's like
he has three legs.
813
00:39:02,092 --> 00:39:03,837
- Guest: Do you need a seat, Catherine?
- My God. Oh!
814
00:39:03,861 --> 00:39:05,138
- Would you like this...?
- Oh, thank you.
815
00:39:05,162 --> 00:39:08,063
Yeah, I... No, I see
one way over there.
816
00:39:08,099 --> 00:39:09,192
You have a seat.
817
00:39:09,228 --> 00:39:11,733
So, when Enid told
me about "Vivante!"
818
00:39:11,769 --> 00:39:14,802
I thought it sounded
like a revolution,
819
00:39:14,838 --> 00:39:18,506
and every revolution
starts with a conversation,
820
00:39:18,542 --> 00:39:20,541
which is why we are here.
821
00:39:20,577 --> 00:39:22,911
This is the way "Ms."
magazine started.
822
00:39:22,947 --> 00:39:25,247
Can't believe it was
a half-century ago.
823
00:39:25,283 --> 00:39:27,249
Oh, my God.
824
00:39:27,285 --> 00:39:30,585
Gloria Steinem: So, maybe
the new frontier is aging.
825
00:39:30,621 --> 00:39:34,393
So, this is our new frontier
and you are it, folks.
826
00:39:35,259 --> 00:39:37,253
We live longer than men,
827
00:39:37,289 --> 00:39:39,928
which we don't mean
to do, actually.
828
00:39:43,034 --> 00:39:46,100
Uh, but for all of
us, women and men,
829
00:39:46,136 --> 00:39:50,004
with our much longer life expectancy in this world...
830
00:39:50,040 --> 00:39:56,444
I think we're
beginning to see all kinds of new possibilities.
831
00:39:56,480 --> 00:40:01,616
And the more we understand that,
the more we stop being divided
832
00:40:01,652 --> 00:40:05,687
by age, and race, and
culture, and, and gender.
833
00:40:05,723 --> 00:40:08,624
I love you. I love you so much.
834
00:40:08,660 --> 00:40:11,097
I love you, baby. I love you.
835
00:40:11,930 --> 00:40:14,566
Ooh, ooh!
836
00:40:16,434 --> 00:40:18,366
How'd we do? How'd we do?
837
00:40:18,402 --> 00:40:20,806
Happy Fourth of July.
838
00:40:27,813 --> 00:40:29,777
Oh! Wow, gosh.
839
00:40:29,813 --> 00:40:32,480
- There's probably no original way...
- Talk or go!
840
00:40:32,516 --> 00:40:34,382
Oh, sorry. No, you go. Sorry.
841
00:40:34,418 --> 00:40:36,896
-Oh, I think we should...
-Here, guess we'll... Yeah, over here.
842
00:40:36,920 --> 00:40:41,256
There's really no... Ooh, I'm sor...
Oh, here. Ooh, 's-scuse me. Sorry.
843
00:40:41,292 --> 00:40:42,758
Anyway, there's, like I said,
844
00:40:42,794 --> 00:40:44,059
no original way to say this,
845
00:40:44,095 --> 00:40:45,826
but, so, just thank you.
846
00:40:45,862 --> 00:40:49,431
Thank you. I have admired
you my entire life.
847
00:40:49,467 --> 00:40:52,300
Well, I guess that means we
care about the same things.
848
00:40:52,336 --> 00:40:54,935
I would like to think so, yes.
849
00:40:54,971 --> 00:40:58,507
- Oh.
- And I'm not proud to admit, but I almost didn't come today
850
00:40:58,543 --> 00:41:03,844
because I thought that...
maybe I didn't quite belong.
851
00:41:03,880 --> 00:41:07,849
I'm afraid I'm still battling
my own deep-seated ageism.
852
00:41:07,885 --> 00:41:09,117
We're all battling that.
853
00:41:09,153 --> 00:41:10,985
But we are at the age of
854
00:41:11,021 --> 00:41:14,690
- our minds, not our wombs, hello.
- Yes. Yes, exactly.
855
00:41:14,726 --> 00:41:16,091
- Excuse me.
- Ooh.
856
00:41:16,127 --> 00:41:18,660
The "Vivante!" photographer
is desperate for you.
857
00:41:18,696 --> 00:41:20,461
- Okay, okay, okay.
- Carrie: Oh, thank you.
858
00:41:20,497 --> 00:41:25,634
-We'll meet again.
-Okay. I hope so. Thank you. Wow. Wow.
859
00:41:25,670 --> 00:41:27,436
Oh, my gosh, Enid, hi.
860
00:41:27,472 --> 00:41:29,304
Wow. This is... This
was thrilling, really.
861
00:41:29,340 --> 00:41:32,474
I would be honored to
write for "Vivante!"
862
00:41:32,510 --> 00:41:36,111
Oh, I don't want you to write
a thousand words about purses.
863
00:41:36,147 --> 00:41:38,947
I want you to give $100,000.
864
00:41:38,983 --> 00:41:40,510
Uh... pardon me?
865
00:41:40,546 --> 00:41:45,187
We're asking founding
donors to give $100,000.
866
00:41:45,223 --> 00:41:50,125
So, I'm, I... I'm not
here because of my age,
867
00:41:50,161 --> 00:41:53,161
I'm here because
of my deep pockets?
868
00:41:53,197 --> 00:41:55,997
Due to tragic circumstances,
869
00:41:56,033 --> 00:42:00,672
your pockets recently
got deeper, so, yes.
870
00:42:01,205 --> 00:42:05,006
Well, Enid... if I
gave you $100,000,
871
00:42:05,042 --> 00:42:09,812
I'd have to give everyone $100,000.
872
00:42:09,848 --> 00:42:11,341
- Touché.
- Hm.
873
00:42:11,377 --> 00:42:13,315
What if I put you in "Ask Enid,"
874
00:42:13,351 --> 00:42:16,051
how much would you be
comfortable investing?
875
00:42:16,087 --> 00:42:17,519
Enid, I'm heading out.
876
00:42:17,555 --> 00:42:19,254
Um, forgive me for asking.
877
00:42:19,290 --> 00:42:22,157
Would you mind terribly being
in a photo with Enid and me?
878
00:42:22,193 --> 00:42:24,487
- I would love that.
- Oh, wow, okay.
879
00:42:24,523 --> 00:42:25,940
- Would you take it?
- Sheila: Oh, absolutely.
880
00:42:25,964 --> 00:42:27,996
-Oh, thank you. There you go.
-All righty.
881
00:42:28,032 --> 00:42:29,764
-Okay, ladies.
-Okay, all right. Here we are.
882
00:42:29,800 --> 00:42:31,834
- We'll do this fast, sorry.
- Ready for picture.
883
00:42:33,071 --> 00:42:35,003
Fabulous. Fabulous.
884
00:42:35,039 --> 00:42:38,273
- Thank you.
- Thank you so much, Gloria.
885
00:42:38,309 --> 00:42:39,744
Bye. Safe home.
886
00:42:41,111 --> 00:42:44,947
- Let me eyeball that, I've been burned before.
- Sure, turn it the other way.
887
00:42:44,983 --> 00:42:45,985
Oh.
888
00:42:48,620 --> 00:42:49,616
Uh...
889
00:42:50,455 --> 00:42:51,887
Carrie?
890
00:42:51,923 --> 00:42:54,256
Are you schtupping my boyfriend?
891
00:42:54,292 --> 00:42:57,893
W-What? W-Why would
you even ask that?
892
00:42:57,929 --> 00:42:59,761
This is my Marlon's pecker.
893
00:42:59,797 --> 00:43:03,131
- Why would you have this if you weren't dating him?
- Oh. No, no, no, no.
894
00:43:03,167 --> 00:43:07,906
Someone was trying to set me
up with him, and I said no.
895
00:43:08,272 --> 00:43:10,640
I, I would never
date a man that old.
896
00:43:10,676 --> 00:43:12,610
But I would?
897
00:43:12,976 --> 00:43:17,478
So... let's circle back to what
we were talking about before.
898
00:43:17,514 --> 00:43:19,414
Before you called me old?
899
00:43:19,450 --> 00:43:22,484
So, how much did
you say you wanted?
900
00:43:22,520 --> 00:43:25,087
I don't think I have my
checkbook with me today,
901
00:43:25,123 --> 00:43:27,654
- but...
- PayPal works.
902
00:43:28,793 --> 00:43:30,759
Okay, yeah.
903
00:43:30,795 --> 00:43:32,794
I don't use PayPal much, so.
904
00:43:32,830 --> 00:43:38,733
And just like that, Enid
and I became PayPals.
905
00:43:41,506 --> 00:43:46,712
♪ And we're only two
stars away from Heaven ♪
906
00:43:48,379 --> 00:43:50,812
♪ Hear me out, I'm the one ♪
907
00:43:50,848 --> 00:43:54,616
♪ And we're only
two stars away ♪
908
00:43:54,652 --> 00:43:57,288
♪ Closer each day ♪
909
00:43:57,888 --> 00:44:01,961
♪ Every night I try
to keep you occupied ♪
910
00:44:06,063 --> 00:44:09,625
♪ I get smashed on the
floor without you ♪
911
00:44:09,661 --> 00:44:13,072
♪ When I drop my
idle thoughts ♪
912
00:44:16,707 --> 00:44:20,912
♪ Got me thinkin' we
can take another pass ♪
913
00:44:26,084 --> 00:44:28,450
♪ Hear me out, I'm the one ♪
914
00:44:28,486 --> 00:44:34,093
♪ And we're only two
stars away from heaven ♪
915
00:44:35,493 --> 00:44:37,860
♪ Hear me out, I'm the one ♪
916
00:44:37,896 --> 00:44:41,730
♪ And we're only
two stars away ♪
917
00:44:41,766 --> 00:44:44,633
♪ Closer each day ♪
69342
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