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Kamikaze is a fictional story about loss,
grief and rediscovery.
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If you are dealing
with mental health issues
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or experiencing suicidal feelings,
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speak to someone you trust
or contact a helpline.
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When I was borndad was in an important meeting.
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In five years we've dropped about 40%.
I think that's a lot.
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This indicates a change in behaviour.
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Although he went onas fast as he could...
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I arrived before him.
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Today is Julie's birthdayHurrah, hurrah, hurrah
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Birthdays were a big thingin our family.
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Dad said it was about taking a breakand doing your best.
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Dad died at 54.
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Mum at 46.
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Tom at 23.
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I don't have a lot to celebrate now.
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I have celebrated my last birthday.
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Can you escape your birthdayif you run fast enough?
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You can definitelyrun yourself to death.
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It's not difficult at all.
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Even young,healthy people die occasionally
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from pushing their bodies too hard.
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Lack of sleep, food and drinkcombined with a fast heart rate
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and pushing the body to its limits
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brings about a total collapse.
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Alfie, wake up!
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His grieving has stopped.
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Kitta was dad's colleague.
A brilliant criminal lawyer
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and a former police prosecutor
in her prime and an active runner.
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She ran one marathon after the other.
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She ran to work and in the woods
in her spare time.
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The autopsy established
that Kitta's heart was huge.
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The size of an ox heart.
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Her worries must have been equally big,
but dad never mentioned them.
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It's ages since we've seen your father
here. No more business in London?
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- No, not really.
- Say hello to him from me, will you?
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Dad always stayed
at the same hotel in London
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and ran the same route every morning.
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- Morning, Julie.
- Morning.
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It's day fiveand I haven't eaten in five days.
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I have had nothing to drinkfor ten hours.
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Exhaustion is a conditionthat can kill you.
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Just like hunger and thirst.
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The extreme conditionsyour body is exposed to
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cause your vital organs to fail.
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In the end...
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Liver, stomach...
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You die.
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My dad and I go all in.
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Always.
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Listen up.
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What do you say?
It's past 11 o'clock.
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- Let's go.
- Yes.
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- Can we skip it today?
- Tom, you are so lazy.
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Come on.
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Come on!
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Yes, all right. You got it?
Great!
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Fuck!
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Are you dead?
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Not yet.
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We deliver.
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We deliver.
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We deliver.
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We are focused. We never quit.
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Julie?
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- Renate?
- Hi.
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- Where is Tom?
- They went ahead to the restaurant.
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Sunday lunch.
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Has he made an appointment
to get his vaccinations?
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- Vaccinations?
- Yes.
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For Guatemala.
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In a month.
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For six months.
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- I got an "artist residency".
- Congratulations. Cool.
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Six months.
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What about his exams?
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He better explain that himself.
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- Let me find him.
- Sure. See you.
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See you.
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What did Renate say?
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That she and Tom are going
to Guatemala for six months.
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To realise their art.
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I am really trying to understand
this equation of yours.
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In your head.
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You're throwing
away your entire future
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just to get six months
in Guatemala with Renate.
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Dad, life is not an equation.
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But are you a musician?
Do you want to become one?
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- Playing music makes me happy.
- Sure, I understand that.
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My son...
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You're not a musician.
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You come from
a family with traditions.
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You should carry them with you.
Be proud of and grateful for them.
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We keep the wheels turning.
We are the backbone of society.
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Look at me!
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Another thing that characterizes
our family is that we are focused.
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We don't give up. We deliver.
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If you don't care about youreducation you won't get one.
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It's that simple.
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I'll be by your side, Tom.
I'll help you, Tom. Damn it!
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What do you say?
Are we agreed?
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Tom.
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Are we agreed?
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Okay, then I'm going
to cut off your funds.
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You won't get your child trust fund
until you turn 22.
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I won't pay for your hippie trip
to Guatemala.
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I must admit I don't understand
your relationship with Renate.
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I understand what she can get from
you, but not the other way around.
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Do you think it's love?
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Tom did understand.
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On my 18th birthday his newlaw school girlfriend was invited.
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After dinner everyone agreed
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it was like Aja had alwaysbeen a part of the family.
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Cute, here you are...
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- Julie at 4.
- You can see that it's you.
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- Yes, super cute.
- There is Tom.
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Where is he?
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I don't know.
He might be sleeping.
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Now you know
what your children will look like.
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- Sweetie.
- We will look forward to that.
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We are focused.
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We don't quit.
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We deliver.
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We deliver.
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Help!
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Mister?
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Hello?
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Don't give up.
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Dad?
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Dad, is it you?
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- Yes, this is your dad.
- Shit!
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You were so young.
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- We were looking at baby pictures.
- We also want to see photos of you.
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My Marlon Brando period.
My Harley-Davidson.
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An XLH 1000 1979 custom build.
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- Where was it taken?
- Bayham Street. London. 1984.
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I was your age. 19-20.
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- I loved it.
- Where is it now?
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I sold it.
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Why?
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I grew up.
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My dad ran his entire life.
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And I just ran along.
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You run until you can't runany further. Until the heart stops.
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Or until something gets in your way.
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Or...
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...until someone saves you.
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Bye!
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There you are!
We thought you'd gone to bed.
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No, I was just getting this.
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- Are you giving a concert?
- Yes.
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Dear Julie. Dear sister.
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00:15:32,519 --> 00:15:36,399
There isn't enough music
this evening, and...
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It's your 18th birthday,
so I would like to play you a song.
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I don't remember having a song
on my wish list.
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- That's harsh.
- But go ahead.
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Sure, but you don't always know
what you need.
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00:15:52,799 --> 00:15:56,639
You have probably had
a little too much to drink.
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00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:53,919
Tom got his law degree some monthslater with a pretty good average.
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Dad gave Tom a trip to Africaas a present.
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Do you knowwhat my problem is, dad?
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That I always fucking agreed with you.But you were wrong.
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You, who was always right.
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You, the best and the fastest.
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The winner.
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00:18:13,039 --> 00:18:14,880
Look at us now.
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00:18:53,200 --> 00:18:59,319
- Hey, Julie. Happy birthday.- Krzysztof. How did you know?
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I'm drowning here in flowersand stuff people dropped off, so...
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Were you in the house
on my 18th birthday?
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00:19:08,200 --> 00:19:11,839
I was around, working, I think.
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No, in the evening when...
Tom played a song for me.
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Yes. I heard. He was good.
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No, it was
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"This summer I went swimming,
this summer I might have drowned,
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but I held my head
and I kicked my feet..."
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00:19:38,799 --> 00:19:42,440
Yeah, the song is called
"The swimming song",
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if you want to listen to it.
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Okay. I'll check it out.
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Where are you nowand what are you doing today?
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I don't know because nothing
seems to go as planned.
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I will start my first day
as a 19 year old with a shower.
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A mysterious girl by the name of Juliehas saved the life of Lord Rory Merek.
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Lord Merek, who could have suffereda fatal heart attack,
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is now eager to track down Juliewhose last name is unknown,
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fled the scene shortly after savinghis life in Green Park at midnight.
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I hope she sees this or somebodywho knows her sees this.
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00:21:03,559 --> 00:21:07,839
Acapulco's Ejido Las Pozas:
"One of the world's deadliest streets!"
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- Your receipt.
- Thanks.
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- Is Acapulco your final destination?
- I really hope so.
14458
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