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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:40,856 --> 00:00:43,525 Welcome back to the United Kingdom. 2 00:00:43,525 --> 00:00:45,127 Where have you come from today, sir? 3 00:00:45,127 --> 00:00:47,763 Uh, Holland. 4 00:00:47,763 --> 00:00:49,632 It's the Holland ferry. 5 00:00:49,632 --> 00:00:51,467 Can you be more precise, please? 6 00:00:51,467 --> 00:00:54,603 Uh, yes. Amsterdam. 7 00:00:54,603 --> 00:00:56,505 Business or pleasure? 8 00:00:56,505 --> 00:00:58,007 Do I have to say? 9 00:00:58,007 --> 00:01:01,977 I'll ask again. Business or pleasure? 10 00:01:01,977 --> 00:01:03,778 Uh, pleasure. 11 00:01:05,814 --> 00:01:06,915 On your way. 12 00:01:50,092 --> 00:01:51,126 Took your time. 13 00:02:01,203 --> 00:02:03,939 Seventy grand's worth. Right there. 14 00:02:05,107 --> 00:02:06,775 Bloody hell, kid. 15 00:02:06,775 --> 00:02:08,978 I never thought you'd actually go and do it. 16 00:02:08,978 --> 00:02:11,413 I've remortgaged the café for this. 17 00:02:12,247 --> 00:02:14,182 High stakes player, me, Vince. 18 00:02:16,018 --> 00:02:20,489 This'll show Dennis what sort of a man I really am, hmm? 19 00:02:20,489 --> 00:02:21,556 - Cheers. 20 00:02:25,093 --> 00:02:26,428 Well, come on then. 21 00:02:44,246 --> 00:02:46,482 As soon as she lays an egg, Vince, 22 00:02:46,482 --> 00:02:47,882 we're gonna be rich. 23 00:02:51,820 --> 00:02:53,755 Ey up. The boyfriend's here. 24 00:03:19,448 --> 00:03:21,483 This had better work. 25 00:03:21,483 --> 00:03:23,819 This is every penny I've ever nicked. 26 00:03:23,819 --> 00:03:26,155 Never failed yet, mate. 27 00:03:26,155 --> 00:03:27,889 You'll have an egg in ten days. 28 00:03:42,638 --> 00:03:44,773 Should've laid by now, right? 29 00:03:44,773 --> 00:03:48,744 May be discombobulated from travelling. 30 00:03:48,744 --> 00:03:50,679 She's a racing pigeon. 31 00:03:50,679 --> 00:03:52,214 Travelling's what they do. 32 00:03:52,214 --> 00:03:54,683 Weather's been bad. It affects 'em. 33 00:03:54,683 --> 00:03:56,418 And hanging over her with a shotgun 34 00:03:56,418 --> 00:03:58,754 ain't gonna relax her much, is it? 35 00:03:58,754 --> 00:04:01,023 Listen, I raided the Christmas Club subs 36 00:04:01,023 --> 00:04:02,658 for that there pigeon. 37 00:04:02,658 --> 00:04:03,993 - There's a lot at stake here. - Yeah, well, 38 00:04:03,993 --> 00:04:05,995 she doesn't know that, does she? 39 00:04:05,995 --> 00:04:07,062 Then tell her! 40 00:04:15,971 --> 00:04:17,806 - You heard. 41 00:04:17,806 --> 00:04:19,241 Get laying. 42 00:04:19,241 --> 00:04:20,475 Go on. 43 00:04:21,677 --> 00:04:22,677 Go on. 44 00:04:46,568 --> 00:04:48,170 Shit. 45 00:04:48,170 --> 00:04:52,174 - Oh. Oh, shit. 46 00:04:52,174 --> 00:04:54,009 Shit. 47 00:04:55,978 --> 00:04:58,180 Oh! 48 00:04:58,180 --> 00:05:02,184 - Oh! Ah, shit! 49 00:05:10,526 --> 00:05:12,127 Come on, love. Gotta open up! 50 00:05:12,127 --> 00:05:13,762 All right, I'm comin'. 51 00:05:15,597 --> 00:05:17,032 Wow. 52 00:05:17,032 --> 00:05:19,702 It's either the Oscars or parents' evening. 53 00:05:19,702 --> 00:05:21,070 What you talking about? 54 00:05:21,070 --> 00:05:23,238 You in your finery. 55 00:05:23,238 --> 00:05:26,742 Well, you-- You can't let yourself go, can ya? 56 00:05:33,882 --> 00:05:36,652 - Come on, love. 57 00:05:36,652 --> 00:05:38,020 I thought you said we had a hurry on. 58 00:05:38,020 --> 00:05:39,154 I'm coming. 59 00:06:32,841 --> 00:06:34,643 - Guy, love, 60 00:06:34,643 --> 00:06:36,612 hope the conference is good. 61 00:06:36,612 --> 00:06:38,013 If you tell me what time you're back, 62 00:06:38,013 --> 00:06:41,583 I'll make something nice. Just ring me, eh? 63 00:06:41,583 --> 00:06:44,019 - Love you. 64 00:06:44,019 --> 00:06:46,121 All right, you cock! Just give us a sec. 65 00:07:04,206 --> 00:07:05,407 Horse?! 66 00:07:06,875 --> 00:07:07,909 Are you there? 67 00:07:11,513 --> 00:07:13,882 Yvonne! Hi! 68 00:07:13,882 --> 00:07:16,952 It's all a bit Robinson Crusoe, this, isn't it? 69 00:07:16,952 --> 00:07:18,720 Me battery's flat! 70 00:07:19,621 --> 00:07:25,594 I'm on me way to, uh, a benefits assessment thingy in Castleford. 71 00:07:25,594 --> 00:07:28,097 I'm that late, if I miss me slot, 72 00:07:28,097 --> 00:07:30,099 they're gonna cut me bloody money! 73 00:07:30,099 --> 00:07:33,135 - I'm going that way! - Are ya? 74 00:07:33,135 --> 00:07:34,603 Hop in, Horse. 75 00:07:35,471 --> 00:07:37,973 What did you do with the rest of Man Friday? 76 00:07:37,973 --> 00:07:41,677 Oh, I cooked him and I ate him! 77 00:08:06,068 --> 00:08:09,070 Yeah. I've had a part exchange come in. 78 00:08:10,038 --> 00:08:14,576 What's your best price on a 2007 Ford Focus? 79 00:08:15,811 --> 00:08:17,579 Fifty quid scrap? 80 00:08:17,579 --> 00:08:21,116 Okay. Well, unless I can find some idiot to buy it... 81 00:08:21,116 --> 00:08:23,986 Yeah, well, you wouldn't want to be seen 82 00:08:23,986 --> 00:08:25,754 driving that pile of junk anyway. 83 00:08:25,754 --> 00:08:29,224 Tell you what. Give me 60, and I'll drop it round. 84 00:08:29,224 --> 00:08:30,859 - Ta-ta. 85 00:08:32,461 --> 00:08:33,495 Lomper. 86 00:08:34,496 --> 00:08:36,799 You don't want a car, do you? 87 00:08:36,799 --> 00:08:37,866 No, thanks. 88 00:08:37,866 --> 00:08:38,934 Be seated. 89 00:08:38,934 --> 00:08:40,001 No, I'm-- 90 00:08:42,270 --> 00:08:44,640 He can always tell, can Bill. 91 00:08:45,708 --> 00:08:47,576 He got a sixth sense. 92 00:08:47,576 --> 00:08:48,777 Should be on the telly. 93 00:08:50,946 --> 00:08:53,749 I-I got a load of leads out. 94 00:08:53,749 --> 00:08:55,884 Couple of bites from buyers abroad. 95 00:08:55,884 --> 00:08:57,453 It's looking good. 96 00:08:57,453 --> 00:08:59,554 But bird's a bit late laying. 97 00:09:02,824 --> 00:09:05,126 I-I need an extra week. 98 00:09:07,062 --> 00:09:08,763 The repayment. 99 00:09:10,899 --> 00:09:14,402 The second instalment. Due today. 100 00:09:15,337 --> 00:09:20,009 It's funny, Bill. The end bit's always the same, 101 00:09:20,009 --> 00:09:22,177 but the first bit's always different. 102 00:09:22,177 --> 00:09:24,613 It's fascinating. 103 00:09:24,613 --> 00:09:25,680 Yeah. 104 00:09:28,617 --> 00:09:31,487 You're definitely the first person we've had 105 00:09:31,487 --> 00:09:34,423 whose life has been endangered by a pigeon. 106 00:09:34,423 --> 00:09:35,557 My life? 107 00:09:35,557 --> 00:09:37,726 Oh, he exaggerates. 108 00:09:37,726 --> 00:09:39,561 We'll give you an extra week. 109 00:09:39,561 --> 00:09:40,895 Won't we, Bill? 110 00:09:45,067 --> 00:09:46,167 'Course we will. 111 00:09:47,903 --> 00:09:51,072 And to help you along, we'll give you a car. 112 00:09:51,973 --> 00:09:56,779 I was thinking a nice 2007 Ford Focus. 113 00:09:56,779 --> 00:09:58,213 Lovely little runner. 114 00:09:58,213 --> 00:10:00,015 Lovely. 115 00:10:00,015 --> 00:10:01,783 Five-hundred quid to you. 116 00:10:06,788 --> 00:10:07,822 It's an elephant. 117 00:10:12,894 --> 00:10:14,730 Lilies are a bit more expensive. 118 00:10:14,730 --> 00:10:16,598 So what we talking? Total figure. 119 00:10:16,598 --> 00:10:18,567 With the church, table decorations, 120 00:10:18,567 --> 00:10:21,971 bridesmaids' posies, and the bouquets, 121 00:10:21,971 --> 00:10:25,140 it's around about, uh, eight all in, I'm afraid. 122 00:10:25,140 --> 00:10:26,475 Eight thousand? 123 00:10:26,475 --> 00:10:27,743 Yeah. 124 00:10:29,011 --> 00:10:30,612 More flavour in the packaging. 125 00:10:31,613 --> 00:10:32,948 Still there, Yvonne? 126 00:10:32,948 --> 00:10:35,017 Mmm. Yep. 127 00:10:35,017 --> 00:10:37,653 Decision made. I want the lilies, 128 00:10:37,653 --> 00:10:40,222 so I shall have the lilies. And, uh, Guy shall have a fit, 129 00:10:40,222 --> 00:10:42,825 but, hey, you only get married once. Let's do it! 130 00:10:42,825 --> 00:10:45,026 - On it. 131 00:10:46,695 --> 00:10:50,132 Weddings, Horse. A lot of bloody money. 132 00:10:50,132 --> 00:10:52,768 Yeah. Eight grand for a wedding, eh? 133 00:10:52,768 --> 00:10:55,437 No, that's just for the flowers, love. 134 00:10:55,437 --> 00:10:58,974 Wow. I never knew you and Guy were getting married. 135 00:10:58,974 --> 00:11:01,210 Guy gave you an invite. 136 00:11:01,210 --> 00:11:03,746 - Did he? - Yeah, you RSVP'd. 137 00:11:03,746 --> 00:11:05,180 - Did I? - Said you were visiting 138 00:11:05,180 --> 00:11:07,950 your rellies in Liverpool, couldn't come. 139 00:11:07,950 --> 00:11:09,785 - But I haven't got no rel-- - Hey, what do you think 140 00:11:09,785 --> 00:11:12,821 about this for a business idea? Botox Rocks. 141 00:11:14,156 --> 00:11:16,191 - Is that a band? - Botox 142 00:11:16,191 --> 00:11:18,661 and hot-stone treatments at the same time. 143 00:11:18,661 --> 00:11:20,863 I've got the hypodermics and gel in my bag right here. 144 00:11:20,863 --> 00:11:22,765 I'll do you a freebie! 145 00:11:22,765 --> 00:11:25,000 Well, I've got to be at the assessment centre 146 00:11:25,000 --> 00:11:27,136 - for, uh-- Yeah. - No bother. 147 00:11:27,136 --> 00:11:29,138 Doesn't have to be today. 148 00:11:29,138 --> 00:11:31,974 I've not got a lot on at the moment, to be honest. 149 00:11:31,974 --> 00:11:33,809 Guy's busy with work, and I'm just 150 00:11:33,809 --> 00:11:37,680 sort of waiting about for the baby. 151 00:11:37,680 --> 00:11:39,714 I mean, there's the wedding, of course, but... 152 00:11:41,116 --> 00:11:44,152 Sometimes I just... drive around. 153 00:11:46,888 --> 00:11:48,156 It's nice having company. 154 00:11:49,858 --> 00:11:50,892 Yeah. 155 00:11:53,261 --> 00:11:54,663 Yeah, it is. 156 00:11:59,701 --> 00:12:02,871 Good, good. Next question. 157 00:12:02,871 --> 00:12:05,674 Are you able to stand up independently? 158 00:12:05,674 --> 00:12:08,911 Um, you've just asked me to sit down. 159 00:12:08,911 --> 00:12:11,647 No, I mean as a rule at home. 160 00:12:11,647 --> 00:12:13,215 Oh. Um... 161 00:12:13,215 --> 00:12:16,051 well, I can't do it without me stick, you know? 162 00:12:16,051 --> 00:12:18,887 'Cause, um, I sleep in the lounge now 163 00:12:18,887 --> 00:12:21,890 because I find it difficult getting up and down the stairs. 164 00:12:21,890 --> 00:12:24,460 But with the stick, you can stand up? 165 00:12:24,460 --> 00:12:27,863 - Uh, yeah, yeah. - Good, good. So that's a yes. 166 00:12:27,863 --> 00:12:31,499 Are you able to prepare and cook your own meals? 167 00:12:32,534 --> 00:12:34,970 I like MasterChef, you know? 168 00:12:34,970 --> 00:12:37,773 But, um, I think, like, 169 00:12:37,773 --> 00:12:41,443 I'm--I'm more of a, uh, Pot Noodle man, if I'm honest. 170 00:12:41,443 --> 00:12:43,412 But you could? 171 00:12:43,412 --> 00:12:45,080 Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I think so, yeah. 172 00:12:45,080 --> 00:12:47,650 Good, good. I'm going to put another yes. 173 00:12:47,650 --> 00:12:50,519 Uh, short journeys. How's your mobility? 174 00:12:50,519 --> 00:12:52,154 I see you've managed to get here from... 175 00:12:52,154 --> 00:12:54,690 Sheffield. Yeah, yeah. 176 00:12:54,690 --> 00:12:57,092 Yeah, but it wasn't easy, love, I'll tell ya. 177 00:12:57,092 --> 00:13:00,529 We broke down on the-- on the-- the dual carriageway, 178 00:13:00,529 --> 00:13:02,131 - like, I know-- - And yet, here you are. 179 00:13:02,131 --> 00:13:03,465 So, well done, you. 180 00:13:03,465 --> 00:13:05,968 It's another yes. 181 00:13:05,968 --> 00:13:07,035 Good, good. 182 00:13:18,580 --> 00:13:19,949 Here you go, love. 183 00:13:19,949 --> 00:13:21,683 £1.25, please. 184 00:13:23,518 --> 00:13:24,686 Thank you. 185 00:13:44,073 --> 00:13:45,140 Yes! 186 00:13:47,542 --> 00:13:49,178 - What you doin'? 187 00:13:49,178 --> 00:13:51,780 Uh, nothin'. 188 00:13:51,780 --> 00:13:57,119 Uh, we need another 20 litres of sunflower oil. 189 00:13:57,119 --> 00:13:59,688 Not at 2:30 in the morning, we don't. 190 00:13:59,688 --> 00:14:01,590 I'm just trying to help. 191 00:14:01,590 --> 00:14:02,925 By waking me up? 192 00:14:02,925 --> 00:14:04,125 S-Sorry. 193 00:14:13,468 --> 00:14:15,137 We finally got a buyer. 194 00:14:15,137 --> 00:14:17,706 He's coming over from South bloody Korea, Vince. 195 00:14:17,706 --> 00:14:20,743 Sang-Chol, he's called. Mr Sang-Chol. I Googled him. 196 00:14:20,743 --> 00:14:23,746 He's a-a software billionaire, apparently. 197 00:14:23,746 --> 00:14:26,782 Knows his pigeons, oh, that--that's--that's right. 198 00:14:26,782 --> 00:14:29,118 Has he paid you then, this Sang-Chol fellow? 199 00:14:29,118 --> 00:14:31,887 First 20 grand banked. Oh, now we're talkin'. 200 00:14:31,887 --> 00:14:34,657 - So, when can you pay me back? - Not just yet, Vince. 201 00:14:34,657 --> 00:14:36,558 But there's another 20 once he's seen it, 202 00:14:36,558 --> 00:14:39,028 and he's checked over all the paperwork and she's laid. 203 00:14:39,028 --> 00:14:41,463 Yeah, and about that, when is she gonna lay? 204 00:14:41,463 --> 00:14:43,798 Oh, any day now, Vince. Any day. 205 00:14:44,900 --> 00:14:48,103 And I've named her. Lewis. 206 00:14:48,103 --> 00:14:50,005 Like that detective off the telly? 207 00:14:51,173 --> 00:14:53,742 No, like Lewis Hamilton. 208 00:14:53,742 --> 00:14:56,045 Fastest pigeon in Europe, she were, in her day. 209 00:14:56,045 --> 00:14:58,881 Yeah? Well, I wish she'd get a shift on. 210 00:14:58,881 --> 00:15:00,215 She will, she will. 211 00:15:00,215 --> 00:15:02,952 Trust me, Vince. Trust me. 212 00:15:33,682 --> 00:15:36,118 - Nice to meet ya. 213 00:15:36,118 --> 00:15:38,854 Mr Sang-Chol is very happy to make your acquaintance. 214 00:15:38,854 --> 00:15:40,923 Oh. Well, me too. 215 00:15:42,524 --> 00:15:43,926 My name is Mun-Hee. 216 00:15:43,926 --> 00:15:46,495 Lomper. Pleased to meet you. 217 00:15:46,495 --> 00:15:48,230 This is a great day for Mr Sang-Chol. 218 00:15:48,230 --> 00:15:50,065 He's most desirous of seeing 219 00:15:50,065 --> 00:15:51,800 the eggs of the propitious pigeon. 220 00:15:52,701 --> 00:15:56,772 Uh, the propitious pigeon hasn't actually laid yet. 221 00:16:01,043 --> 00:16:02,678 No? 222 00:16:02,678 --> 00:16:04,113 No. 223 00:16:59,835 --> 00:17:00,969 Just tea bags. 224 00:17:16,585 --> 00:17:19,989 Mr Sang-Chol will stay at the hotel until Lewis has laid. 225 00:17:19,989 --> 00:17:23,058 You will pay for the unheralded extension to his stay. 226 00:17:24,226 --> 00:17:26,428 - Oh, right. - If you need to contact him, 227 00:17:26,428 --> 00:17:28,430 he is in the presidential suite. 228 00:17:29,898 --> 00:17:31,700 That--That's nice. 229 00:18:04,866 --> 00:18:07,970 He don't look like the sort of fucker you mess with. 230 00:18:09,505 --> 00:18:11,607 I can't force her to bloody lay. 231 00:18:11,607 --> 00:18:15,911 I didn't know they even had a presidential suite. 232 00:18:19,948 --> 00:18:21,684 I've been thinking. 233 00:18:21,684 --> 00:18:23,519 What if she's a ringer? 234 00:18:23,519 --> 00:18:25,955 She isn't. I got all the paperwork and everything. 235 00:18:25,955 --> 00:18:27,056 - Paperwork. - Yeah. 236 00:18:27,056 --> 00:18:28,624 - Paperwork? - Yeah. 237 00:18:28,624 --> 00:18:29,892 You can do owt on a computer these days. 238 00:18:29,892 --> 00:18:31,460 - Oh. - And what about 239 00:18:31,460 --> 00:18:34,063 that male pigeon? Shooting blanks, maybe. 240 00:18:34,063 --> 00:18:37,700 No, he's famous. He's sired half of Britain's best racers. 241 00:18:37,700 --> 00:18:39,768 Oh, we can all have our rough days on that front. 242 00:18:39,768 --> 00:18:41,937 - Oh. - Ask Ellie. 243 00:18:41,937 --> 00:18:43,906 - On second thoughts, better not. 244 00:18:43,906 --> 00:18:46,442 If she hasn't laid by tomorrow, 245 00:18:46,442 --> 00:18:48,644 I'll take her to see Reg, yeah? 246 00:18:48,644 --> 00:18:51,012 At least get her checked over by a specialist. 247 00:18:52,514 --> 00:18:54,750 Oh, come on, Mrs Pigeon. 248 00:18:54,750 --> 00:18:56,919 It doesn't take that long to lay a bloody egg. 249 00:18:56,919 --> 00:18:58,554 Come on. Get on with it. 250 00:19:34,857 --> 00:19:36,458 Hey. 251 00:19:36,458 --> 00:19:38,594 It's harassment. It's musical bullying. 252 00:19:38,594 --> 00:19:40,062 It is pretty good though, isn't it? 253 00:19:40,062 --> 00:19:42,164 Yeah, but that's not the point, Mr Amagee. 254 00:19:42,164 --> 00:19:44,066 Not at all. 255 00:19:44,066 --> 00:19:45,133 Hey, Jean. 256 00:19:46,702 --> 00:19:50,071 Have you thought more about, you know, what I said? 257 00:19:50,972 --> 00:19:54,777 Thought about it? Dil, I've thought about nothing else. 258 00:19:54,777 --> 00:19:57,546 - And? - Oh, Christ. I don't know. 259 00:19:57,546 --> 00:20:00,015 I don't wanna sneak around anymore, you know? 260 00:20:00,015 --> 00:20:02,551 - It's--It's not us. It's wrong. 261 00:20:02,551 --> 00:20:05,521 It's deceitful. 262 00:20:05,521 --> 00:20:08,791 - We need to be honest. - Yeah, I know. 263 00:20:08,791 --> 00:20:10,693 Even if it hurts people we care about. 264 00:20:10,693 --> 00:20:12,661 I know. 265 00:20:28,677 --> 00:20:31,480 Come on, now. Give me some good news. 266 00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:32,581 There's a love. 267 00:20:34,650 --> 00:20:38,487 - I booked the vet's for 1:30, 268 00:20:38,487 --> 00:20:39,855 so you better get going. 269 00:20:39,855 --> 00:20:41,724 I need to nip to the bog first. 270 00:20:41,724 --> 00:20:43,792 Terry's blocked it again. Gone for the plunger. 271 00:20:43,792 --> 00:20:46,729 Well, I'm gonna have to stop off at the café. 272 00:20:46,729 --> 00:20:49,765 Yeah? Well, don't be late. 273 00:20:49,765 --> 00:20:52,834 I wanna know what the hell's going on with that bird. 274 00:20:56,138 --> 00:20:57,172 Okay. 275 00:20:59,207 --> 00:21:00,509 You want more lettuce? 276 00:21:00,509 --> 00:21:02,044 Yeah, if it's not a problem. 277 00:21:02,044 --> 00:21:04,480 Problem? No. No. 278 00:21:04,480 --> 00:21:05,848 Not at all. 279 00:21:05,848 --> 00:21:08,117 Dennis. I've got this letter. 280 00:21:08,117 --> 00:21:09,718 Oh, won the pools, have we? 281 00:21:09,718 --> 00:21:11,787 It's from the Benefits Agency. 282 00:21:11,787 --> 00:21:13,822 They're telling me that I'm fit for work, 283 00:21:13,822 --> 00:21:15,457 and I don't quite know how to-- 284 00:21:15,457 --> 00:21:17,426 I'm right busy, Hor-- 285 00:21:17,426 --> 00:21:18,861 Here. 286 00:21:18,861 --> 00:21:21,664 I'm not stayin'. 287 00:21:21,664 --> 00:21:23,499 Where have you been? 288 00:21:23,499 --> 00:21:25,834 Cut some more lettuce, will ya? 289 00:21:25,834 --> 00:21:28,671 It says you're a fit and functioning member of society. 290 00:21:28,671 --> 00:21:30,439 - Congratulations. - But I can't even-- 291 00:21:30,439 --> 00:21:31,807 Look, I'm in a bit of a hurry. 292 00:21:31,807 --> 00:21:33,708 Yes! The lettuce. 293 00:21:37,947 --> 00:21:41,784 Now where's he gone? 294 00:21:41,784 --> 00:21:44,552 Oh, not on the prep table! 295 00:21:46,221 --> 00:21:48,156 How many times? 296 00:21:58,066 --> 00:22:00,502 Oh! 297 00:22:00,502 --> 00:22:03,038 Oh, go on! Out! Out! 298 00:22:05,641 --> 00:22:07,442 Dirty fucking things! 299 00:22:14,116 --> 00:22:16,151 Ooh, that's better. Caught short there. 300 00:22:16,151 --> 00:22:17,653 I have told you one million times... 301 00:22:17,653 --> 00:22:20,756 - I'm just gonna-- - ...shut that back door. 302 00:22:20,756 --> 00:22:23,826 I have just had a bloody pigeon in here. 303 00:22:23,826 --> 00:22:25,494 - A pigeon? - Imagine if the health inspector 304 00:22:25,494 --> 00:22:27,162 had been on patrol. He'd have shut us down. 305 00:22:27,162 --> 00:22:28,396 What-- 306 00:22:29,231 --> 00:22:30,899 - Where is it? - What? 307 00:22:30,899 --> 00:22:32,635 - The pigeon. - In the salad. 308 00:22:32,635 --> 00:22:35,571 - Excuse me? - Nearly there! 309 00:22:35,571 --> 00:22:36,871 Your bloody Majesty. 310 00:22:37,806 --> 00:22:40,075 - Where's the-- - I've shooed it out! 311 00:22:40,075 --> 00:22:41,577 What do you think? 312 00:22:41,577 --> 00:22:43,012 - What-- Out? - Yes. 313 00:22:43,012 --> 00:22:45,414 But-- W-W-Where did it-- If it went-- Which-- 314 00:22:45,414 --> 00:22:47,616 If you're having a stroke, could you wait 315 00:22:47,616 --> 00:22:48,950 till the lunch rush is over? 316 00:22:59,428 --> 00:23:01,930 Hey, Lomps. 317 00:23:01,930 --> 00:23:03,932 - Lomps, I've got this letter. - Oh, no. 318 00:23:03,932 --> 00:23:05,567 - I don't know what to do. - Not now, Horse. 319 00:23:05,567 --> 00:23:07,102 Um, oh, all right. All right. 320 00:23:14,476 --> 00:23:17,145 Oh, God. Oh, God. 321 00:23:24,953 --> 00:23:27,623 Lomper, I called the vet. 322 00:23:27,623 --> 00:23:29,692 I know you never showed. 323 00:23:29,692 --> 00:23:31,460 Just so you know, 324 00:23:31,460 --> 00:23:33,629 the last person who double-crossed me 325 00:23:33,629 --> 00:23:35,631 lost both his kneecaps. 326 00:23:35,631 --> 00:23:37,933 Call me! Urgently! 327 00:23:44,973 --> 00:23:47,643 I hope you know the Korean for "fuck up", love. 328 00:23:47,643 --> 00:23:48,710 'Cause we've got one. 329 00:23:54,322 --> 00:23:56,591 - Where are you? 330 00:23:56,591 --> 00:24:00,028 I had to do the whole lunch rush on me own. Call me. 331 00:24:01,696 --> 00:24:03,632 Honestly. 332 00:24:03,632 --> 00:24:06,401 What can I get you, gentlemen? 333 00:24:06,401 --> 00:24:09,071 Lomper. You can get us him. 334 00:24:09,071 --> 00:24:10,171 He's not in. 335 00:24:11,306 --> 00:24:12,574 Oh, dear. 336 00:24:12,574 --> 00:24:14,476 Bill. 337 00:24:14,476 --> 00:24:16,077 Indeed. 338 00:24:17,445 --> 00:24:21,149 Personal question, so, you know, 339 00:24:21,149 --> 00:24:23,018 feel free not to answer it. 340 00:24:23,018 --> 00:24:26,121 But married, are ya? You and Lomper? 341 00:24:26,121 --> 00:24:29,224 We are, as a matter of fact. Yes. 342 00:24:29,224 --> 00:24:31,526 Ah, so what's yours is his. What's his is yours. 343 00:24:31,526 --> 00:24:33,494 - Mmm. - For richer, for poorer. 344 00:24:35,263 --> 00:24:37,265 Ain't that how it goes? 345 00:24:37,265 --> 00:24:38,667 Uh, I seem to remember something similar 346 00:24:38,667 --> 00:24:40,902 from the marriage vows, yes. 347 00:24:40,902 --> 00:24:44,005 Well, that is a big relief. Isn't it, Bill? 348 00:24:44,005 --> 00:24:46,140 - Relief? - Huge. 349 00:24:47,542 --> 00:24:51,145 'Cause your husband owes us £17,500. 350 00:24:52,514 --> 00:24:54,249 He what? 351 00:24:54,249 --> 00:24:55,884 And if he hasn't paid the next instalment 352 00:24:55,884 --> 00:24:57,619 by the end of the week, 353 00:24:57,619 --> 00:25:00,121 plus the one that he's just missed... 354 00:25:01,589 --> 00:25:03,458 well, then we're coming to get it from you. 355 00:25:08,663 --> 00:25:10,565 - This? - Mmm. 356 00:25:15,069 --> 00:25:16,237 We'll see you soon. 357 00:25:17,372 --> 00:25:18,406 Ta-ra. 358 00:25:20,208 --> 00:25:21,543 - Mmm. 359 00:25:21,543 --> 00:25:23,177 That was fuckin' lovely. 360 00:25:26,515 --> 00:25:28,450 We're going to have to close. 361 00:25:28,450 --> 00:25:31,353 Now. Personal circumstances. 362 00:25:31,353 --> 00:25:33,955 - So sorry. - Well, I was in the middle 363 00:25:33,955 --> 00:25:35,490 of a very interesting conversation 364 00:25:35,490 --> 00:25:37,893 with a Nigerian lawyer. 365 00:25:37,893 --> 00:25:40,395 Apparently, I've been left some money in a will. 366 00:25:41,930 --> 00:25:44,132 - Come on. Out you get. 367 00:25:44,132 --> 00:25:45,600 Okay, thank you. 368 00:25:45,600 --> 00:25:47,869 - So sorry. Bye, bye, bye. 369 00:25:54,175 --> 00:25:57,446 I can't get to me phone, so leave me a message. 370 00:25:58,947 --> 00:26:01,583 Lomper, what the hell is going on? 371 00:26:01,583 --> 00:26:03,418 Where are you? 372 00:26:04,586 --> 00:26:06,220 Sorry, we're closed. 373 00:26:08,590 --> 00:26:10,025 I said we're-- 374 00:26:12,994 --> 00:26:16,631 Mr Sang-Chol is not interested in a cup of tea. 375 00:26:16,631 --> 00:26:20,602 Mr Sang-Chol is interested in the whereabouts of Mr Lomper. 376 00:26:20,602 --> 00:26:22,270 Who are you? 377 00:26:22,270 --> 00:26:26,041 Mr Lomper owes Mr Sang-Chol a lot of money. 378 00:26:26,041 --> 00:26:27,309 He does? 379 00:26:27,309 --> 00:26:28,343 How much? 380 00:26:28,343 --> 00:26:30,278 - You, out. - Gladly. 381 00:26:30,278 --> 00:26:31,947 - This place is a madhouse. 382 00:26:31,947 --> 00:26:34,116 - Oh, my God. 383 00:26:34,116 --> 00:26:35,283 He's not upstairs. 384 00:26:36,651 --> 00:26:39,020 So, where is the bastard? 385 00:26:48,062 --> 00:26:49,897 - Amsterdam? 386 00:26:51,132 --> 00:26:53,268 - Hello? - Oh, hello. 387 00:26:53,268 --> 00:26:57,004 Um, it's Dennis Godfrey here. 388 00:26:58,706 --> 00:27:01,510 - Uh, yes, Lomper's husband. - Ah, right. 389 00:27:01,510 --> 00:27:06,181 Who am I speaking to, please? 390 00:27:06,181 --> 00:27:08,216 This is Richard. 391 00:27:08,216 --> 00:27:09,283 Richard? 392 00:27:11,152 --> 00:27:13,488 As in Lomper's Uncle Dickie, Richard? 393 00:27:13,488 --> 00:27:15,457 Yes. 394 00:27:15,457 --> 00:27:16,524 But... 395 00:27:18,293 --> 00:27:21,229 ...you're dead. 396 00:27:28,036 --> 00:27:30,005 - Is he here? - Who? 397 00:27:30,005 --> 00:27:31,873 Oh, don't give me that. I've seen the way you look at him. 398 00:27:31,873 --> 00:27:33,909 - My husband, that's who. - Lomper? 399 00:27:33,909 --> 00:27:37,112 - Oh, so you do know. - Mate, you just told me. 400 00:27:37,112 --> 00:27:38,379 Enjoy Amsterdam, did ya? 401 00:27:39,180 --> 00:27:42,184 - Amsterdam? - Ah, so you admit it. 402 00:27:42,184 --> 00:27:45,287 I'm not understanding the rules of this conversation at all. 403 00:27:45,287 --> 00:27:46,587 Guy? 404 00:27:48,690 --> 00:27:50,959 Do you know what your boyfriend gets up to, Yvonne? 405 00:27:50,959 --> 00:27:53,428 Eh, do you? His proclivities, hmm? 406 00:27:53,428 --> 00:27:55,997 Do I know Guy's bisexual and went out with Lomper 407 00:27:55,997 --> 00:27:58,166 25 years ago? Yeah, I do. 408 00:27:58,166 --> 00:28:00,102 Oh. 409 00:28:00,102 --> 00:28:02,204 Very modern, I'm sure. 410 00:28:02,204 --> 00:28:04,405 Dennis, mate, what's up? 411 00:28:06,908 --> 00:28:08,076 He's gone, Guy. 412 00:28:09,377 --> 00:28:10,912 He's got somebody else. 413 00:28:13,648 --> 00:28:16,017 It's all been a tissue of lies. 414 00:28:41,276 --> 00:28:43,344 I might have known I'd find you here. 415 00:28:44,512 --> 00:28:46,114 Best view in Sheffield. 416 00:28:49,217 --> 00:28:50,952 Oh. I'm sorry, Dennis. 417 00:28:53,188 --> 00:28:54,523 I guess you know. 418 00:28:54,523 --> 00:28:57,459 If you mean Amsterdam, oh, yes, I know. 419 00:28:57,459 --> 00:29:00,262 - Right. - And the remortgage. 420 00:29:00,262 --> 00:29:02,197 Uh-huh. 421 00:29:02,197 --> 00:29:04,866 So how much of our money have you frittered away, 422 00:29:04,866 --> 00:29:06,935 you old fool? 423 00:29:06,935 --> 00:29:10,338 About 70 grand, give or take. 424 00:29:10,338 --> 00:29:12,407 70 grand? 425 00:29:14,642 --> 00:29:17,645 Oh. Well, that's us bust, good and proper. 426 00:29:21,116 --> 00:29:25,053 Got a name, this dirty, little secret of yours, eh? 427 00:29:25,053 --> 00:29:27,055 - Lewis. - Lewis, oh? 428 00:29:27,055 --> 00:29:29,091 Nice. 429 00:29:29,091 --> 00:29:31,259 - Where'd you meet him? - Her. 430 00:29:31,259 --> 00:29:34,996 Worse and worse. 431 00:29:34,996 --> 00:29:36,465 Online. 432 00:29:36,465 --> 00:29:38,232 So predictable. 433 00:29:39,934 --> 00:29:42,204 I've been looking for a couple of years. 434 00:29:42,204 --> 00:29:43,905 You think I didn't notice 435 00:29:43,905 --> 00:29:47,876 all those late-night sessions on the computer? 436 00:29:47,876 --> 00:29:49,644 Disgusting. 437 00:29:49,644 --> 00:29:52,180 Picked her up in Amsterdam. 438 00:29:52,180 --> 00:29:54,949 Had to smuggle her in, like. 439 00:29:56,151 --> 00:29:57,185 Trafficking? 440 00:29:58,486 --> 00:30:00,455 Jesus Christ, Lomper. 441 00:30:00,455 --> 00:30:03,191 I were trying to breed from her. 442 00:30:03,191 --> 00:30:06,595 You swore blind you never wanted kids. 443 00:30:06,595 --> 00:30:09,131 Just not with me, it seems. 444 00:30:09,131 --> 00:30:10,532 Lewis is 445 00:30:10,532 --> 00:30:12,267 a Northern Light Black Busschaert. 446 00:30:12,267 --> 00:30:14,636 You think I care what you call the bitch? 447 00:30:14,636 --> 00:30:15,970 A pigeon. 448 00:30:21,609 --> 00:30:24,412 Right. I know that. 449 00:30:26,281 --> 00:30:27,382 Hang on a sec. 450 00:30:28,516 --> 00:30:31,152 You spent 70 grand on a bloody pigeon? 451 00:30:33,121 --> 00:30:36,358 You really are a fucking idiot. 452 00:30:36,358 --> 00:30:38,627 Well, wh-who's the fucking idiot 453 00:30:38,627 --> 00:30:41,229 who kicked it out the kitchen door, eh? 454 00:30:42,530 --> 00:30:43,631 Oh. 455 00:30:50,371 --> 00:30:53,075 What? This is what we're looking for? 456 00:30:53,075 --> 00:30:55,343 Oh, yeah. Now, I think I've seen this one in the bins 457 00:30:55,343 --> 00:30:57,345 round the back of the school with all its mates. 458 00:30:57,345 --> 00:30:58,913 It's a pigeon. 459 00:30:59,714 --> 00:31:02,184 - Answers to the name of... - Health hazard. 460 00:31:02,184 --> 00:31:03,218 Pecker. 461 00:31:03,218 --> 00:31:04,853 Lewis, if you must know. 462 00:31:04,853 --> 00:31:07,489 Like Lewis Hamilton? 463 00:31:07,489 --> 00:31:09,558 Yeah. Like Lewis Hamilton. 464 00:31:09,558 --> 00:31:12,327 - 'Cause she's fast? - Brilliant, Horse. 465 00:31:12,327 --> 00:31:14,129 It's all about the tyre changes, apparently. 466 00:31:14,129 --> 00:31:16,531 You got slicks, uh, wets, intermediates-- 467 00:31:16,531 --> 00:31:18,166 Shut up, you. 468 00:31:18,166 --> 00:31:20,035 - What? 469 00:31:20,035 --> 00:31:23,472 Laugh all you like, but there's a thousand-pound reward 470 00:31:23,472 --> 00:31:25,974 for the person who finds her. 471 00:31:25,974 --> 00:31:28,977 A grand? For a flying rat? 472 00:31:28,977 --> 00:31:30,512 If that's the reward, then what's she worth? 473 00:31:30,512 --> 00:31:33,348 My life, literally. 474 00:31:33,348 --> 00:31:35,650 He really lights up a room, doesn't he? 475 00:31:35,650 --> 00:31:36,851 Come on then. 476 00:32:05,280 --> 00:32:08,417 As far as I can tell, any of them could be Lewis. 477 00:32:08,417 --> 00:32:10,986 - Or none of them. - Or none of them. 478 00:32:10,986 --> 00:32:12,654 Lewis! 479 00:32:12,654 --> 00:32:15,623 Lewis! 480 00:32:17,692 --> 00:32:19,294 Well, I don't know, do I? 481 00:32:19,294 --> 00:32:21,263 I don't mind looking daft for a grand. 482 00:32:23,065 --> 00:32:25,434 Lewis! 483 00:32:25,434 --> 00:32:28,403 - Lewis! - Lewis! 484 00:32:28,403 --> 00:32:31,940 - Lewis! - Lewis! 485 00:32:45,187 --> 00:32:48,590 What kind of celebrity bird would hang out here? 486 00:32:50,092 --> 00:32:53,462 Bottom line, a pigeon's a pigeon. 487 00:32:53,462 --> 00:32:57,966 Yeah, though some silly fucker would still pay £70,000 for one. 488 00:32:57,966 --> 00:33:01,937 Uh, look, I thought, you know, go big or go home. 489 00:33:01,937 --> 00:33:05,540 I would go home, but you've remortgaged it! 490 00:33:05,540 --> 00:33:10,345 The real betrayal is the deception and the lies. 491 00:33:10,345 --> 00:33:14,049 Not a word to me after 22 years. 492 00:33:14,049 --> 00:33:16,485 - Well, you'd only have said no. - Seventy grand on a thing 493 00:33:16,485 --> 00:33:19,221 with feathers you can't even wear on a Friday night? 494 00:33:19,221 --> 00:33:22,457 - You're damn right I would. - Yeah, you have no faith in me. 495 00:33:22,457 --> 00:33:24,993 None at all. You never have had. 496 00:33:24,993 --> 00:33:26,961 You think I'm usel-- 497 00:33:37,572 --> 00:33:39,674 This is ridiculous. 498 00:33:39,674 --> 00:33:42,277 How many CEOs are out looking for pigeons, do you think? 499 00:33:43,945 --> 00:33:45,981 I only went out with Lomper for a few months. 500 00:33:45,981 --> 00:33:47,649 Boy, have I paid for that. 501 00:33:47,649 --> 00:33:48,883 Nope. 502 00:33:50,051 --> 00:33:52,354 I've got way too much on for this. 503 00:33:57,592 --> 00:33:59,327 - Lewis! - Lewis! 504 00:33:59,327 --> 00:34:01,630 - Lewis. Lewis. - Lewis. 505 00:34:01,630 --> 00:34:04,199 Lewis. Lewis. 506 00:34:04,199 --> 00:34:06,101 Lewis. 507 00:34:11,439 --> 00:34:13,975 Oh, don't tell me Lewis is in there getting a bit of shopping. 508 00:34:13,975 --> 00:34:15,576 Nah, it's menswear. 509 00:34:15,977 --> 00:34:17,879 See this hoodie? 510 00:34:17,879 --> 00:34:19,114 Is that-- 511 00:34:19,114 --> 00:34:20,916 I don't know. 512 00:34:20,916 --> 00:34:22,383 Could I wear that? 513 00:34:24,052 --> 00:34:25,887 - Guess so. Why not? - Mmm. 514 00:34:25,887 --> 00:34:28,657 You'd be bang on trend with that, Mr Horsfall. 515 00:34:28,657 --> 00:34:31,493 - You're not taking the piss? - No. 516 00:34:31,493 --> 00:34:33,428 All right. I'll catch you up. 517 00:34:46,508 --> 00:34:48,310 I can see you moving. 518 00:34:48,310 --> 00:34:49,644 What? 519 00:34:49,644 --> 00:34:51,513 Oh, Garry. 520 00:34:51,513 --> 00:34:53,648 I thought you was one of them living statues. 521 00:34:53,648 --> 00:34:56,084 - You're not, are you? - No. 522 00:34:56,084 --> 00:34:58,387 Funny way to earn a living, if you ask me. 523 00:34:58,387 --> 00:35:01,256 You wanna get yourself a proper bloody job. 524 00:35:01,256 --> 00:35:04,059 Not that there are any proper bloody jobs anymore. 525 00:35:04,059 --> 00:35:06,494 I'm looking for a pigeon. 526 00:35:08,029 --> 00:35:10,999 Not often I say this about you, 527 00:35:10,999 --> 00:35:14,870 but you have a success story on your hands here, kid. 528 00:35:14,870 --> 00:35:17,405 No. A particular pi-- 529 00:35:20,074 --> 00:35:21,109 Andy. 530 00:35:22,110 --> 00:35:23,912 Don't move. 531 00:35:23,912 --> 00:35:25,980 I don't much these days. 532 00:35:39,694 --> 00:35:41,630 I've got it. 533 00:35:41,630 --> 00:35:42,898 I'm a grand up. 534 00:35:47,335 --> 00:35:50,372 Stood there most of the day, I was. 535 00:35:50,372 --> 00:35:54,176 One particular little bugger on me head most of the time. 536 00:35:54,176 --> 00:35:56,111 - Still, worth it. 537 00:35:56,111 --> 00:35:58,513 Do you do cash, Lomps? 538 00:36:02,050 --> 00:36:03,918 That's not her. 539 00:36:05,086 --> 00:36:06,254 It is. 540 00:36:06,254 --> 00:36:07,556 Got the thingy on its leg. 541 00:36:07,556 --> 00:36:09,124 Has to be. Look, the tag. 542 00:36:09,124 --> 00:36:10,525 Tag's from Barnsley Loft. 543 00:36:12,227 --> 00:36:13,328 You sure? 544 00:36:13,328 --> 00:36:14,595 Looks nowt like her, Gaz. 545 00:36:16,431 --> 00:36:17,465 Great. 546 00:36:23,705 --> 00:36:26,574 Pigeon shit all over me jacket. 547 00:36:34,449 --> 00:36:36,151 I see you're hiring. 548 00:36:36,151 --> 00:36:38,053 Uh, yeah. 549 00:36:38,053 --> 00:36:40,922 How are you with cappuccinos, frappuccinos, espressos, mochas? 550 00:36:44,125 --> 00:36:45,293 I can do coffee. 551 00:37:06,247 --> 00:37:07,282 Hiya. 552 00:37:09,451 --> 00:37:11,286 Hiya, love. 553 00:37:11,286 --> 00:37:12,353 Been out? 554 00:37:13,555 --> 00:37:15,223 Yeah. 555 00:37:18,993 --> 00:37:20,896 I have. 556 00:37:20,896 --> 00:37:21,996 Mmm. 557 00:37:26,201 --> 00:37:27,435 So, uh... 558 00:37:29,237 --> 00:37:31,106 what do you think? 559 00:37:31,106 --> 00:37:32,174 Of what? 560 00:37:32,174 --> 00:37:34,942 - The-- The togs. - Hmm? 561 00:37:38,913 --> 00:37:42,584 Oh. Been raiding the lost property box again? 562 00:37:42,584 --> 00:37:44,853 No, no. I went shoppin'. 563 00:37:44,853 --> 00:37:46,121 Did ya? 564 00:37:46,121 --> 00:37:47,322 What for? 565 00:37:47,322 --> 00:37:50,992 Well, uh... smarten up a bit. 566 00:37:50,992 --> 00:37:52,661 Oh. 567 00:37:52,661 --> 00:37:54,629 Good for you. 568 00:37:56,097 --> 00:37:58,433 Um, listen, I've, um, gotta... 569 00:38:00,034 --> 00:38:02,070 - Uh, there's, um... 570 00:38:03,338 --> 00:38:06,474 half a-- half a lasagne left in the, uh... 571 00:38:08,143 --> 00:38:10,679 ...in the, uh-- in the kitchen... 572 00:38:12,013 --> 00:38:15,016 if you're, uh-- you're hungry. 573 00:38:16,852 --> 00:38:20,121 Sorry, man. I hope you find something. 574 00:39:16,478 --> 00:39:19,114 No, couldn't find her. 575 00:39:23,418 --> 00:39:25,953 I know I moan about this place a lot... 576 00:39:27,989 --> 00:39:29,290 ...but I will miss it. 577 00:39:30,158 --> 00:39:35,063 It's more than a café. It's a place where people come. 578 00:39:35,063 --> 00:39:37,566 I mean, who else is gonna give Horse free cake? 579 00:39:37,566 --> 00:39:39,968 You give him free cake? 580 00:39:39,968 --> 00:39:41,436 Of course I do. 581 00:39:41,436 --> 00:39:43,838 He hasn't got two pennies to rub together, has he? 582 00:39:44,806 --> 00:39:47,408 Where are folks like him gonna go when we shut, eh? 583 00:39:48,443 --> 00:39:51,646 Do you think Costa and Starbucks are gonna give them free cake? 584 00:39:56,251 --> 00:39:58,019 It had a purpose, this place. 585 00:39:59,220 --> 00:40:00,521 I had a purpose. 586 00:40:04,159 --> 00:40:06,428 How did we come to this, Lomper? 587 00:40:08,096 --> 00:40:09,197 I don't know. 588 00:40:10,565 --> 00:40:13,434 All that debt, the risk. 589 00:40:14,269 --> 00:40:16,438 Those people in cheap leather jackets. 590 00:40:16,438 --> 00:40:18,139 I mean, I say leather. 591 00:40:21,443 --> 00:40:22,643 What possessed you? 592 00:40:25,113 --> 00:40:27,148 I wanted you to notice me. 593 00:40:28,116 --> 00:40:30,051 Well, mostly, I'm invisible. 594 00:40:32,053 --> 00:40:35,290 Then, every once in a while, you spot I'm here, 595 00:40:35,290 --> 00:40:38,293 and there's this look crosses your face 596 00:40:38,293 --> 00:40:40,896 like you really don't like me anymore. 597 00:40:40,896 --> 00:40:42,230 Well, I do. 598 00:40:45,600 --> 00:40:50,038 You said you want-- wanted adventure in therapy that time. 599 00:40:50,038 --> 00:40:52,007 Uh, I thought with Lewis, 600 00:40:52,007 --> 00:40:54,076 maybe I could do something a bit adventurous, 601 00:40:54,076 --> 00:40:59,347 something to surprise you, to make you proud of me. 602 00:40:59,347 --> 00:41:01,049 The surprise bit worked. 603 00:41:03,084 --> 00:41:06,054 I mean, every couple has their ups and downs, right? 604 00:41:08,189 --> 00:41:09,624 When was the last up? 605 00:41:13,027 --> 00:41:15,063 Old Andy's 70th. 606 00:41:15,063 --> 00:41:17,532 That's only 'cause you put Gaz's cocaine 607 00:41:17,532 --> 00:41:19,201 on your dinner. 608 00:41:22,971 --> 00:41:24,472 Best chips I've ever had. 609 00:41:26,141 --> 00:41:27,642 That were eight years ago, Den. 610 00:41:29,511 --> 00:41:30,945 Really? 611 00:41:33,715 --> 00:41:35,049 I disappoint you. 612 00:41:36,451 --> 00:41:38,519 I do. I wish I didn't, but I do. 613 00:41:42,257 --> 00:41:44,359 I'll go sleep up on Edge. 614 00:41:44,359 --> 00:41:46,427 You never know. She may come back. 615 00:41:49,497 --> 00:41:52,600 But even if she don't, you deserve better, Dennis. 616 00:42:32,074 --> 00:42:34,009 - Get out me room! 617 00:42:34,009 --> 00:42:37,379 - You're scaring the neighbours. - Get out my fucking room! 618 00:42:37,379 --> 00:42:40,515 See, that's what I'm talking about, innit? 619 00:42:41,316 --> 00:42:43,385 If I start sharing the rent with your mum, 620 00:42:43,385 --> 00:42:46,454 then... is it your fucking room? 621 00:42:47,422 --> 00:42:48,423 Discuss. 622 00:42:49,624 --> 00:42:52,860 Look, I'm trying to be reasonable here. 623 00:42:54,529 --> 00:42:56,431 Your mum and I love each other. 624 00:42:56,431 --> 00:42:59,568 You don't like that. I get it. 625 00:42:59,568 --> 00:43:04,372 So, 500 is a deposit on a room somewhere. 626 00:43:04,372 --> 00:43:07,275 And you can stop paying me back for the windscreen. 627 00:43:07,275 --> 00:43:08,977 My mum know you're trying to blackmail me 628 00:43:08,977 --> 00:43:10,045 out me own house, does she? 629 00:43:12,313 --> 00:43:14,149 And who do you think she's gonna believe? 630 00:43:15,951 --> 00:43:18,953 Worked out well last time, didn't it? 631 00:43:26,228 --> 00:43:27,995 Oh. No hurry. 632 00:44:10,405 --> 00:44:11,873 Vince. 633 00:44:11,873 --> 00:44:14,342 Vince, I've seen her near the stadium! 634 00:44:14,342 --> 00:44:15,610 Call Dennis for me! 635 00:44:17,679 --> 00:44:19,981 - Let's go. 636 00:44:19,981 --> 00:44:22,551 Make sure the ball gets to feet. Let's have good headers. 637 00:44:24,553 --> 00:44:25,987 Gaffer, gaffer. 638 00:44:27,355 --> 00:44:29,424 I'm not good with heights, Vince. 639 00:44:29,424 --> 00:44:31,526 Not-- Not good at all. 640 00:44:31,526 --> 00:44:34,262 No? Then how about I don't push you off 641 00:44:34,262 --> 00:44:35,363 if you get the bird? 642 00:44:35,363 --> 00:44:36,497 Deal. 643 00:44:38,199 --> 00:44:39,434 Come on. Lewis. 644 00:44:39,434 --> 00:44:41,303 Lewis. Come on, Lewis. 645 00:44:41,303 --> 00:44:43,071 Come on. Come on. 646 00:44:43,071 --> 00:44:45,874 Since when's a pigeon turn its beak up at grain? 647 00:44:45,874 --> 00:44:48,409 She's a quality bird, Vince. I've always said so. 648 00:44:50,044 --> 00:44:52,581 Lomper! What are you doing?! 649 00:44:52,581 --> 00:44:54,182 Come down! 650 00:44:54,182 --> 00:44:55,584 No! 651 00:44:55,584 --> 00:44:58,320 Please, don't be an idiot! 652 00:44:58,320 --> 00:45:01,289 I'm-- I'm not! I-I've found her! 653 00:45:01,289 --> 00:45:02,491 Lewis! 654 00:45:02,491 --> 00:45:04,025 Oh, no. 655 00:45:05,660 --> 00:45:09,297 Mr Sang-Chol would prefer that Mr Lomper comes to Earth. 656 00:45:09,297 --> 00:45:11,967 Yeah, me too, darling. Me too. 657 00:45:11,967 --> 00:45:14,369 She's gone down here, Vince. I'm sure of it. 658 00:45:14,369 --> 00:45:16,671 I'm coming, I'm coming. I'm right behind ya. 659 00:45:19,274 --> 00:45:22,978 He says that at least it would be an honourable death. 660 00:45:22,978 --> 00:45:26,581 Right. Well, you tell him another comment like that, 661 00:45:26,581 --> 00:45:29,618 and I'll bloody drop him. That's my man we're talking about. 662 00:45:29,618 --> 00:45:32,187 - Lomper! 663 00:45:34,189 --> 00:45:35,456 I found her, Vince! 664 00:45:38,593 --> 00:45:40,395 I think I know why she's not coming. 665 00:45:40,395 --> 00:45:42,531 Oh, let me guess. 666 00:45:42,531 --> 00:45:44,866 The grain's not fucking organic. 667 00:45:44,866 --> 00:45:47,069 No, I know exactly why. 668 00:45:47,069 --> 00:45:50,072 - Come on. Come on. 669 00:45:50,072 --> 00:45:51,506 Lomper! 670 00:45:53,041 --> 00:45:54,976 Lomper, what the hell are you doing?! 671 00:45:57,545 --> 00:46:00,648 - Lomper, get back here! 672 00:46:02,117 --> 00:46:04,219 Jesus, now what's he doing? 673 00:46:07,622 --> 00:46:09,891 Lomper, what the hell are you doing?! 674 00:46:09,891 --> 00:46:11,593 I think she's laid! 675 00:46:11,593 --> 00:46:13,228 I don't care! 676 00:46:13,228 --> 00:46:15,497 For God's sake, come down! 677 00:46:15,497 --> 00:46:18,934 No. Whatever happens, you're not losing Grand Pain. 678 00:46:18,934 --> 00:46:22,904 Grand Pain. How many times? 679 00:46:22,904 --> 00:46:24,339 What?! 680 00:46:24,339 --> 00:46:28,643 Look, I don't care about Le Grand--the café. 681 00:46:28,643 --> 00:46:32,213 I don't care about anything except you! 682 00:46:33,982 --> 00:46:35,350 I love ya. 683 00:46:37,685 --> 00:46:38,886 Really? 684 00:46:40,221 --> 00:46:41,623 - Oh! - Lomper! 685 00:46:43,024 --> 00:46:44,325 Lomper! 686 00:46:45,260 --> 00:46:49,331 - Come down, for God's sake! 687 00:47:03,478 --> 00:47:05,013 We have eggs! 688 00:47:05,013 --> 00:47:06,881 Yes. Yes! 689 00:47:23,432 --> 00:47:26,334 Is that enough adventure for ya?! 690 00:47:49,958 --> 00:47:51,493 Hey, no, Dennis. 691 00:47:51,493 --> 00:47:53,628 Dennis, Dennis, wait, wait. No, no, no! 692 00:47:53,628 --> 00:47:55,464 Oh, you daredevil! 693 00:48:07,408 --> 00:48:08,443 Oh. 694 00:48:23,591 --> 00:48:25,494 - Game on! 695 00:48:30,465 --> 00:48:32,467 Oh! 47618

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