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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:18,393 --> 00:00:20,353 - Babe, we did it! Oh, my God, okay. 2 00:00:20,395 --> 00:00:21,580 Here's another one. You ready? - Yeah. 3 00:00:21,604 --> 00:00:23,523 - "VICE Magazine," "'Based on a True Story, ' 4 00:00:23,565 --> 00:00:24,649 "real or hoax? 5 00:00:24,691 --> 00:00:25,793 The podcast that's gripped the nation." 6 00:00:25,817 --> 00:00:26,943 - Holy shit. 7 00:00:26,985 --> 00:00:28,361 - Keep going. - Yep, we got one 8 00:00:28,403 --> 00:00:30,321 from BuzzFeed: "Top ten moments you can't miss 9 00:00:30,363 --> 00:00:32,198 from 'Based on a True Story.'" 10 00:00:32,240 --> 00:00:34,200 - Love you, BuzzFeed. - Another amazing one. 11 00:00:34,242 --> 00:00:35,326 "New York Times Magazine," 12 00:00:35,368 --> 00:00:36,995 "Bill Kristol and Noam Chomsky debate, 13 00:00:37,037 --> 00:00:39,789 'What does "Based on a True Story" say about America?'" 14 00:00:39,831 --> 00:00:41,499 - It says, the best... 15 00:00:41,541 --> 00:00:43,376 country ever! - Oh, my God. 16 00:00:43,418 --> 00:00:46,379 Charli D'Amelio tweeted "My new favorite obsession! 17 00:00:46,421 --> 00:00:48,214 #basedonatruestory!" 18 00:00:48,256 --> 00:00:49,734 - Who's Charli D'Amelio? - I loved her 19 00:00:49,758 --> 00:00:51,402 from "Dancing with the Stars." She won last year... 20 00:00:51,426 --> 00:00:52,528 - Okay. - But she also has, like, 21 00:00:52,552 --> 00:00:54,429 150 million followers on TikTok, 22 00:00:54,471 --> 00:00:56,032 so we are fucking viral, babe! 23 00:00:56,056 --> 00:00:57,390 - Uh-oh, look who's callin' here. 24 00:00:57,432 --> 00:00:59,351 Okay. Hey, you see the Daily Beast? 25 00:00:59,392 --> 00:01:01,102 Who is the voice 26 00:01:01,144 --> 00:01:03,188 of "Based on a True Story"? 27 00:01:03,229 --> 00:01:05,065 - Can you believe that? 28 00:01:05,106 --> 00:01:07,192 - Man, we are everywhere. 29 00:01:07,233 --> 00:01:08,526 - Right? 30 00:01:08,568 --> 00:01:09,778 How far away are you? 31 00:01:09,819 --> 00:01:12,364 - I'm just on Sunset. I'll see you soon. 32 00:01:13,865 --> 00:01:15,825 - Why did she invite him? - I don't know. 33 00:01:15,867 --> 00:01:18,119 It's like, if I know someone, she has to know them too. 34 00:01:18,161 --> 00:01:19,537 My friend has to be her friend. 35 00:01:19,579 --> 00:01:21,390 If I have a plumber, she has to have the same plumber. 36 00:01:21,414 --> 00:01:23,166 It's like, fuck off. - Yeah. 37 00:01:23,208 --> 00:01:25,460 This is gonna be a fucking great party. 38 00:01:35,053 --> 00:01:36,429 - All right. - Hi, guys. 39 00:01:36,471 --> 00:01:39,015 - Wow. - Welcome. Hi. 40 00:01:39,057 --> 00:01:40,600 - Beautiful in here. - Oh, thank you. 41 00:01:40,642 --> 00:01:42,727 You look amazing. You're huge. - Thank you. 42 00:01:42,769 --> 00:01:44,229 Uh... - Hi. 43 00:01:44,270 --> 00:01:46,147 - Hi, girls. - So good to see you. 44 00:01:46,189 --> 00:01:48,733 - You guys look gorgeous. - This dress... 45 00:01:48,775 --> 00:01:50,568 - Cut two dresses... - Stop. 46 00:01:50,610 --> 00:01:52,046 - And put it together. - No, you did not. 47 00:01:52,070 --> 00:01:53,154 - Hi! - Tory! 48 00:01:53,196 --> 00:01:54,322 - Hi, sis. - Hello. 49 00:01:54,364 --> 00:01:55,740 - Little kid. 50 00:01:55,782 --> 00:01:56,741 - You need a sweater. 51 00:01:56,783 --> 00:01:58,326 - Oh, hi. - No, let it all out. 52 00:01:58,368 --> 00:02:00,912 - How was school? - I just graduated. 53 00:02:00,954 --> 00:02:03,540 - You look smarter. - Looking for a place to stay, 54 00:02:03,581 --> 00:02:05,792 you know, before baby comes and kicks me out. 55 00:02:05,834 --> 00:02:07,394 - Oh, my God, no one is kicking you out. 56 00:02:07,419 --> 00:02:08,878 Is there food yet? - Yeah, inside. 57 00:02:08,920 --> 00:02:10,630 - Bye. - Hi. 58 00:02:10,672 --> 00:02:12,882 - Who's your date? - Tinder guy. 59 00:02:12,924 --> 00:02:15,844 - Uh, no, actually, Bumble guy. Jacob. 60 00:02:15,885 --> 00:02:17,095 - Another fuckfest. 61 00:02:17,137 --> 00:02:18,972 - Oh, no, it's, like, a little early. 62 00:02:19,014 --> 00:02:20,473 - Is it? - Alcohol? 63 00:02:20,515 --> 00:02:21,599 - Mm-hmm, yes. - Yeah. 64 00:02:21,641 --> 00:02:23,018 - Yes, yes. - I see this. 65 00:02:23,059 --> 00:02:23,977 - Bye. - Holding hands. 66 00:02:24,019 --> 00:02:25,228 - Intimate. 67 00:02:26,646 --> 00:02:28,189 - I used to hate these things. 68 00:02:28,231 --> 00:02:29,607 I always got outbid. 69 00:02:29,649 --> 00:02:31,276 Not anymore, babe. - Not anymore. 70 00:02:31,317 --> 00:02:32,569 - Look at this watch. 71 00:02:32,610 --> 00:02:34,529 - Ten-day vacation... Four Seasons in Maui. 72 00:02:34,571 --> 00:02:36,322 Ooh, I like that one. 73 00:02:36,364 --> 00:02:38,175 - What else we got here? - A little wine tasting 74 00:02:38,199 --> 00:02:39,784 at home? That would be nice too. 75 00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:41,286 - A brick. 76 00:02:41,327 --> 00:02:43,663 - What is that? - "A single brick salvaged 77 00:02:43,705 --> 00:02:46,833 from the last Manhattan residence of Edgar Allan Poe"? 78 00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:49,044 - A creepy brick owned by a horror writer? 79 00:02:49,085 --> 00:02:51,212 I have to have that. - Early anniversary present? 80 00:02:51,254 --> 00:02:53,524 - That is so mine. - It's gonna be yours, baby. 81 00:02:53,548 --> 00:02:54,942 - It also works as a weapon. - Hey, it's my two 82 00:02:54,966 --> 00:02:56,343 favorite people. 83 00:02:57,385 --> 00:02:58,636 - Hey, Matt. - Hey. 84 00:02:58,678 --> 00:03:01,348 - Hey, Michelle. - Hey. 85 00:03:01,389 --> 00:03:03,350 - I didn't know you were coming. 86 00:03:03,391 --> 00:03:04,768 - Well, surprise. - Yay. 87 00:03:04,809 --> 00:03:06,394 - Yeah. - Great. Yeah. 88 00:03:06,436 --> 00:03:09,647 And it's great that you guys... Um, how are you? 89 00:03:09,689 --> 00:03:12,984 - You know what? We are awesome. 90 00:03:13,026 --> 00:03:16,363 - Yeah, and we have Nathan to thank because he set us up. 91 00:03:16,404 --> 00:03:17,781 - Yeah. - Oh, I... no, I didn't. 92 00:03:17,822 --> 00:03:19,449 I... I definitely didn't set you up. 93 00:03:19,491 --> 00:03:21,826 - No, no, you did. You did, remember? 94 00:03:21,868 --> 00:03:22,911 I... I said he was hot, 95 00:03:22,952 --> 00:03:25,747 and then you said he was good people. 96 00:03:25,789 --> 00:03:27,165 - Buddy, thanks. 97 00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:28,750 I owe you. - I didn't... 98 00:03:28,792 --> 00:03:30,543 - Good people? 99 00:03:31,920 --> 00:03:33,880 - Oop, excuse me. 100 00:03:33,922 --> 00:03:35,965 Thank you so much. 101 00:03:36,007 --> 00:03:38,385 Oh, my God, these canapes are amazing. 102 00:03:38,426 --> 00:03:40,136 - Ugh, I know. I've had, like, 17 of them. 103 00:03:40,178 --> 00:03:42,389 - Uh... 104 00:03:44,599 --> 00:03:47,185 Uh... Carlos is here. 105 00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:49,062 - Mm, mm-hmm. 106 00:03:49,104 --> 00:03:51,022 Yeah. 107 00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:52,732 - You invited Carlos? 108 00:03:52,774 --> 00:03:54,818 - Yes. I want all my friends here. 109 00:03:54,859 --> 00:03:56,337 - Oh, my God. You invite him to, like, 110 00:03:56,361 --> 00:03:58,405 socialize too? 111 00:03:58,446 --> 00:04:00,031 - Well, this is the first one, 112 00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:01,408 but Simon doesn't care. 113 00:04:01,449 --> 00:04:02,784 - Hey. - See? 114 00:04:02,826 --> 00:04:03,785 All good. 115 00:04:03,827 --> 00:04:05,537 - You guys are so fucking weird. 116 00:04:07,956 --> 00:04:09,416 Hey, guys. 117 00:04:11,209 --> 00:04:12,419 Bring it in. 118 00:04:12,460 --> 00:04:14,254 Look at these new numbers. 119 00:04:14,295 --> 00:04:16,589 15 million downloads. 120 00:04:16,631 --> 00:04:18,133 - That's a lot of fuckin' money. 121 00:04:18,174 --> 00:04:19,551 - Yeah, that's a lot of money. 122 00:04:19,592 --> 00:04:20,427 - Like, a million dollars. - Can you believe that? 123 00:04:20,468 --> 00:04:21,761 Can you believe that? 124 00:04:21,803 --> 00:04:24,097 - Yeah, but you know what the next question is? 125 00:04:24,139 --> 00:04:25,515 How do we make it bigger? 126 00:04:25,557 --> 00:04:27,267 - Okay, let's just enjoy this moment. 127 00:04:27,308 --> 00:04:28,601 - We gotta push it. Look. 128 00:04:28,643 --> 00:04:30,395 I went on a bit of a deep dive on Reddit. 129 00:04:30,437 --> 00:04:32,897 Okay, 24% of our fans, 130 00:04:32,939 --> 00:04:35,108 they want me to keep talking about my greatest hits 131 00:04:35,150 --> 00:04:37,610 over and over like I'm Billy fucking Joel, 132 00:04:37,652 --> 00:04:40,530 but 76%, guess what they want? 133 00:04:40,572 --> 00:04:42,449 - Don't say it. - Fresh new content, 134 00:04:42,490 --> 00:04:43,450 motherfuckers. Both: No. 135 00:04:43,491 --> 00:04:44,784 - No. - Yeah. Yeah. 136 00:04:44,826 --> 00:04:45,845 - We're not talking about that anymore. 137 00:04:45,869 --> 00:04:47,138 - They said it. - Faking it worked 138 00:04:47,162 --> 00:04:48,413 pretty good in Vegas. 139 00:04:48,455 --> 00:04:49,330 - The fake was great. It was great. 140 00:04:49,372 --> 00:04:50,665 It was a one-time thing. 141 00:04:50,707 --> 00:04:51,624 - How 'bout a two-time thing? - It was great. 142 00:04:51,666 --> 00:04:52,584 - Why? - No, we've gotten listen 143 00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:54,753 to our 15-million fanbase, 144 00:04:54,794 --> 00:04:56,296 and we gotta keep it real for them. 145 00:04:56,338 --> 00:04:57,672 - Okay, listen to this. 146 00:04:57,714 --> 00:05:00,091 Spotify is talking about a $20-million deal with us. 147 00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:01,569 - Yeah. - So how 'bout that's keeping 148 00:05:01,593 --> 00:05:03,928 shit real, bro? - That's keeping it real real, 149 00:05:03,970 --> 00:05:05,638 so just keep your shit together, 150 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:08,058 don't fuck it up, and just keep cool. 151 00:05:08,099 --> 00:05:09,392 Offer's comin' in any minute. 152 00:05:09,434 --> 00:05:10,518 We're all gonna be rich. 153 00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:12,145 - Okay. Great. 154 00:05:12,187 --> 00:05:13,730 - Got it? - I got it, yeah. 155 00:05:13,772 --> 00:05:16,024 - Don't fuck this up. - Okay, don't fuck it up. 156 00:05:49,432 --> 00:05:51,559 - Yeah? 157 00:06:02,987 --> 00:06:04,989 - Okay, ready? Oh, good catch. 158 00:06:05,031 --> 00:06:06,700 Good boy. Come here. Come here. 159 00:06:08,118 --> 00:06:09,869 Come here, boy, you handsome boy. 160 00:06:12,706 --> 00:06:14,582 Ooh. Oh, good catch. 161 00:06:14,624 --> 00:06:16,334 Oh, Duke is such a handsome boy. 162 00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:18,086 Come here. - Hey. 163 00:06:18,128 --> 00:06:20,088 Do you wanna try this edible flower? 164 00:06:20,130 --> 00:06:22,882 - Do you think we could get the dog back? 165 00:06:22,924 --> 00:06:24,718 - Uh, sorry, what? 166 00:06:24,759 --> 00:06:26,094 Are you kidding? - I just... I... 167 00:06:26,136 --> 00:06:28,096 - I'm really feeling like 168 00:06:28,138 --> 00:06:29,514 he wants to come home. 169 00:06:29,556 --> 00:06:32,017 - Okay, babe. We gave them the dog. 170 00:06:32,058 --> 00:06:34,060 You can't ask for something like that back. 171 00:06:34,102 --> 00:06:35,603 That's insane. - We gave him the dog 172 00:06:35,645 --> 00:06:37,272 because our yard was too small. 173 00:06:37,313 --> 00:06:38,273 - Yes. - But that's about 174 00:06:38,314 --> 00:06:39,274 to fucking change. 175 00:06:39,315 --> 00:06:40,650 We're gonna have a huge yard. 176 00:06:40,692 --> 00:06:42,110 He should come home. 177 00:06:42,152 --> 00:06:43,504 I mean, look... Look at the way he's... 178 00:06:43,528 --> 00:06:45,363 He throws the ball like such a pussy. 179 00:06:45,405 --> 00:06:46,823 He's like... - Anybody see that? 180 00:06:46,865 --> 00:06:48,700 - It is kind of a lame throw. 181 00:06:48,742 --> 00:06:50,469 - Right? Just like... - Yeah, but that doesn't mean 182 00:06:50,493 --> 00:06:51,619 you can steal the dog back. 183 00:06:51,661 --> 00:06:53,663 - Good catch, Duke! 184 00:06:53,705 --> 00:06:54,789 - His name is McEnroe. 185 00:06:54,831 --> 00:06:56,624 It's not Duke, and he knows it. 186 00:06:56,666 --> 00:06:58,209 - You gotta let it go, okay? 187 00:06:58,251 --> 00:06:59,461 We can't ask for the dog back. 188 00:06:59,502 --> 00:07:02,297 - Okay, fine. We'll buy him back. 189 00:07:02,339 --> 00:07:04,674 - You know how much Simon loves this dog? 190 00:07:04,716 --> 00:07:06,551 He does. He's obsessed. 191 00:07:06,593 --> 00:07:08,470 - He sleeps in the guesthouse with him. 192 00:07:08,511 --> 00:07:10,013 - Do you think I give a shit? 193 00:07:11,598 --> 00:07:13,099 Hey, pal. 194 00:07:14,684 --> 00:07:16,120 It's us. He's look... he's looking at... 195 00:07:16,144 --> 00:07:17,496 - Babe, he's not looking at us. - He's looking at us. 196 00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:19,272 - No, he's not. You can't take something 197 00:07:19,314 --> 00:07:20,273 like that away. - Hey. 198 00:07:20,315 --> 00:07:21,316 - That's... that's nuts. 199 00:07:21,358 --> 00:07:22,442 - Yeah, um, can I... 200 00:07:22,484 --> 00:07:23,627 Can I grab you for a second? I just... 201 00:07:23,651 --> 00:07:24,819 - Yeah. - I need a hand. 202 00:07:24,861 --> 00:07:27,697 - Yes. Please don't steal the dog, okay? 203 00:07:27,739 --> 00:07:29,407 - Come here, Duke. Come to me. Come to me. 204 00:07:29,449 --> 00:07:30,950 Oh, come here. Good catch. 205 00:07:30,992 --> 00:07:33,453 Good boy. Come here. Come here. 206 00:07:33,495 --> 00:07:35,038 Okay, Duke. 207 00:07:35,080 --> 00:07:36,373 Go get it. 208 00:07:36,414 --> 00:07:38,458 Oh, good catch. You're such a handsome boy. 209 00:07:38,500 --> 00:07:39,709 Bring it back. Bring it back. 210 00:07:50,345 --> 00:07:53,890 - Just love this room! 211 00:07:53,932 --> 00:07:55,850 It's so beautiful. Where are the party favors? 212 00:07:55,892 --> 00:07:57,435 You hiding them up here? - Ava... 213 00:07:57,477 --> 00:07:58,853 - Also, you have no pictures. 214 00:07:58,895 --> 00:08:01,356 It's really weird. - Hey, are you okay? 215 00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:03,525 - What? 216 00:08:06,778 --> 00:08:08,113 What... what is that? 217 00:08:08,154 --> 00:08:09,989 - I don't know. You tell me. 218 00:08:10,031 --> 00:08:12,033 I saw it fall out of your pocket at CrimeCon. 219 00:08:12,075 --> 00:08:15,286 - I've... I've never seen that before in my life. 220 00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:16,722 - You've never seen this before in your life? 221 00:08:16,746 --> 00:08:17,831 - No. - Ever? 222 00:08:17,872 --> 00:08:19,374 - No. - Okay. 223 00:08:19,416 --> 00:08:22,752 "WTF? You killed Dahlia? 224 00:08:22,794 --> 00:08:24,254 "You made a podcast without us? 225 00:08:24,295 --> 00:08:27,132 Meet us outside in the corridor now." 226 00:08:28,842 --> 00:08:31,177 You're "Based on a True Story," aren't you? 227 00:08:31,219 --> 00:08:32,262 - The... 228 00:08:32,303 --> 00:08:35,015 "Based on a"... The... the... the podcast? 229 00:08:35,056 --> 00:08:36,725 - Ava, I-I just... I wanna help you. 230 00:08:36,766 --> 00:08:37,851 Are you in danger? - No. 231 00:08:37,892 --> 00:08:39,644 - Because I... I called the number 232 00:08:39,686 --> 00:08:40,788 on this phone, and Matt answered. 233 00:08:40,812 --> 00:08:43,023 - I don't... no. What? 234 00:08:43,064 --> 00:08:45,400 - He's the Westside fucking Ripper, isn't he? 235 00:08:45,442 --> 00:08:46,901 What is going on? 236 00:08:46,943 --> 00:08:48,379 - Okay... - Why... why are you doing this? 237 00:08:48,403 --> 00:08:49,797 Is... is he threatening you... - It's not what you think. 238 00:08:49,821 --> 00:08:51,072 - Or Nathan? - Oh, my God, no. 239 00:08:51,114 --> 00:08:53,324 It's not... It's not like that at all. 240 00:08:53,366 --> 00:08:55,261 - No? Then what is it? Because it says right here 241 00:08:55,285 --> 00:08:56,911 that he killed that girl in Vegas. 242 00:08:56,953 --> 00:08:58,747 - Okay, is that why you invited Matt tonight? 243 00:08:58,788 --> 00:09:00,040 So you could ask me about this? 244 00:09:00,081 --> 00:09:01,750 - I mean, I invited him to find out 245 00:09:01,791 --> 00:09:03,436 if he's the guy so I... So I could help you, 246 00:09:03,460 --> 00:09:05,187 but if you don't want my help, I'll just go to the cops with... 247 00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:06,647 - No, no, no. No, no, no. No, no, no, no, no. 248 00:09:06,671 --> 00:09:08,816 There's no... we don't need to... Let's just all calm down. 249 00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:10,276 No cops. You don't need to call anybody. 250 00:09:10,300 --> 00:09:12,427 Oh, fuck. Okay. I'm gonna tell you the truth. 251 00:09:12,469 --> 00:09:14,054 Okay? - Okay. 252 00:09:15,263 --> 00:09:16,723 - Nathan and I are broke. 253 00:09:16,765 --> 00:09:18,850 We... we were gonna lose the house. 254 00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:20,310 - What? - I know, and Matt was over, 255 00:09:20,352 --> 00:09:21,936 and we started talking, and it turns out 256 00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:25,106 he's a... he's this, like, crime fanatic junkie like us. 257 00:09:25,148 --> 00:09:29,486 So the three of us decided to make a fake podcast 258 00:09:29,527 --> 00:09:33,323 where Matt pretends to be the Westside Ripper. 259 00:09:36,409 --> 00:09:40,121 - So Matt is pretending to be a serial killer? 260 00:09:40,163 --> 00:09:41,515 - I know. When you say it like that, 261 00:09:41,539 --> 00:09:42,641 it sounds really bad, but... 262 00:09:42,665 --> 00:09:45,251 It-it's so bad and... And fucked up. 263 00:09:45,293 --> 00:09:47,253 I know it sounds like that, but we were desperate, 264 00:09:47,295 --> 00:09:49,255 desperate, completely desperate, and... 265 00:09:49,297 --> 00:09:51,466 And then Matt, like, he got, like, really into it, 266 00:09:51,508 --> 00:09:53,218 and he pretended he was the guy 267 00:09:53,259 --> 00:09:54,761 that pushed that girl off the roof. 268 00:09:54,803 --> 00:09:56,137 And people got obsessed. 269 00:09:56,179 --> 00:09:58,431 They couldn't get enough of it. 270 00:09:58,473 --> 00:10:01,601 - So you're saying that all of this is... is fake 271 00:10:01,643 --> 00:10:02,828 and that guy's just a plumber? 272 00:10:02,852 --> 00:10:04,896 - Yes! - Because this looks 273 00:10:04,938 --> 00:10:06,523 pretty fucking real to me. 274 00:10:06,564 --> 00:10:07,732 - Well, good. 275 00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:10,276 We... We got you. 276 00:10:10,318 --> 00:10:11,361 That's good. 277 00:10:11,403 --> 00:10:12,570 That... 278 00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:14,322 Come on. 279 00:10:14,364 --> 00:10:16,449 Do you think that I would be in business 280 00:10:16,491 --> 00:10:18,993 with a real serial killer? 281 00:10:19,035 --> 00:10:21,996 I mean, you sound insane. 282 00:10:22,038 --> 00:10:24,666 That would be the biggest fucking stupidest thing 283 00:10:24,708 --> 00:10:26,334 I could do, right? 284 00:10:26,376 --> 00:10:28,086 Right? 285 00:10:29,713 --> 00:10:30,839 - Yeah. - Right. 286 00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:32,173 Please don't tell anybody. 287 00:10:32,215 --> 00:10:35,427 Truly, like, I... I literally dragged Nathan 288 00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:36,886 into this shit show. 289 00:10:36,928 --> 00:10:38,388 There's a baby coming. 290 00:10:38,430 --> 00:10:41,141 Our lives could be over. 291 00:10:41,182 --> 00:10:42,392 Please. 292 00:10:44,394 --> 00:10:45,770 - Okay. 293 00:10:45,812 --> 00:10:47,772 Okay. Yeah, no, no, no. I... I... 294 00:10:47,814 --> 00:10:48,857 I won't say a word. 295 00:10:48,898 --> 00:10:50,692 - Thank you. 296 00:10:50,734 --> 00:10:53,111 Thank you. - Wow. 297 00:10:53,153 --> 00:10:56,197 I got to admit, this is... This is kind of genius. 298 00:10:56,239 --> 00:10:58,742 "Based on a True Story" is based on a fake story. 299 00:10:58,783 --> 00:11:00,827 - I know. - I-I wish I'd thought of it. 300 00:11:00,869 --> 00:11:03,413 - Yeah. Well, yeah. Well, yeah. Mm-hmm. 301 00:11:03,455 --> 00:11:04,748 Thank you. 302 00:11:05,915 --> 00:11:07,334 - I got your back. 303 00:11:07,375 --> 00:11:10,545 - Thank you. Okay. Okay. - Let's go back outside. 304 00:11:10,587 --> 00:11:13,590 - Duke, Duke. Duke. 305 00:11:13,631 --> 00:11:14,591 Duke. - McEnroe. See? 306 00:11:14,632 --> 00:11:16,009 He likes McEnroe. McEnroe. 307 00:11:16,051 --> 00:11:17,552 McEnroe, right there. 308 00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:20,055 Good boy. 309 00:11:20,096 --> 00:11:21,765 Yes! Come on, buddy. 310 00:11:21,806 --> 00:11:23,475 - Come here. Come here. - Come on, buddy. 311 00:11:27,354 --> 00:11:29,230 - Come to me, Duke. Come to me, Duke. 312 00:11:31,191 --> 00:11:32,233 Good boy. 313 00:11:33,651 --> 00:11:34,944 Ready? Go. - Okay. 314 00:11:34,986 --> 00:11:37,113 I... I got it. Okay, here we go. 315 00:11:37,155 --> 00:11:38,490 Go get it. 316 00:11:38,531 --> 00:11:39,449 - Here boy. Come on. 317 00:11:42,077 --> 00:11:43,787 Here, boy. Come on. - Duke. 318 00:11:43,828 --> 00:11:45,121 - Hey, hey. - Come on. 319 00:11:45,163 --> 00:11:46,831 Bring it to me. Bring it to me, to me. 320 00:11:46,873 --> 00:11:49,042 Me, me. - McEnroe, look at me. 321 00:11:49,084 --> 00:11:51,461 Come here, pal. Come here, pal. 322 00:11:51,503 --> 00:11:52,545 Look at me. Come here. 323 00:11:52,587 --> 00:11:54,172 Bring it to me. To me. - Duke. Duke! 324 00:11:55,882 --> 00:11:58,093 - Come to me, Duke. Come to me. 325 00:11:58,134 --> 00:12:00,720 Come to me. Come to me, Duke. 326 00:12:00,762 --> 00:12:03,056 Yay... oh! 327 00:12:03,098 --> 00:12:05,350 Aah! 328 00:12:10,814 --> 00:12:11,856 Help! Help! 329 00:12:25,328 --> 00:12:27,539 - I'm gonna getcha outta here. 330 00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:52,063 - McEnroe. - Duke. 331 00:12:52,105 --> 00:12:53,499 - McEnroe. - Come to me. Come to me, Duke. 332 00:12:53,523 --> 00:12:54,875 - Bring it to me. - Come to me. Come to me, Duke. 333 00:12:54,899 --> 00:12:56,234 Duke! - Look at me. 334 00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:57,235 - Come to me. Come to me. - McEnroe. 335 00:12:57,277 --> 00:12:58,820 - Come to me. Yeah, yeah. 336 00:12:58,862 --> 00:12:59,821 Oh! Oh, don't... - Good boy. 337 00:13:04,325 --> 00:13:05,952 - Hey. 338 00:13:05,994 --> 00:13:07,787 Hi. Hi. 339 00:13:07,829 --> 00:13:09,998 - You good? 340 00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:12,667 - Um, yes. 341 00:13:12,709 --> 00:13:14,419 Yes, I'm good. 342 00:13:14,461 --> 00:13:17,172 - Everybody, please take a seat inside. 343 00:13:17,213 --> 00:13:20,133 Dinner first, and then the auction. 344 00:13:22,218 --> 00:13:24,054 - Yeah, he likes me so much better than Simon. 345 00:13:24,095 --> 00:13:27,140 - I know. - Let's get that fuckin' brick. 346 00:13:27,182 --> 00:13:30,769 - Hey, did you call me before? 347 00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:32,687 - Uh, it was a butt-dial, sorry. 348 00:13:32,729 --> 00:13:34,314 - Really? - Yep. 349 00:13:34,356 --> 00:13:35,982 Where's the trust, partner? 350 00:13:42,739 --> 00:13:44,339 - The same caterer did my... Our wedding. 351 00:13:44,366 --> 00:13:46,409 - I didn't know that. - Uh-huh. 352 00:13:46,451 --> 00:13:48,161 That's right. - Yeah. 353 00:13:48,203 --> 00:13:49,204 - Hm? 354 00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:50,264 - Absolutely. - It's great. 355 00:13:50,288 --> 00:13:51,247 - Okay. - I wish he would take 356 00:13:51,289 --> 00:13:52,207 an interest in my... - I mean... 357 00:13:55,919 --> 00:13:57,921 - You tried your cake? - No. 358 00:13:57,962 --> 00:13:59,047 - Goodness. 359 00:13:59,089 --> 00:14:00,090 Thank you. 360 00:14:00,131 --> 00:14:01,591 - Nice to see you. 361 00:14:01,633 --> 00:14:04,260 - So are you a part of the crew now? 362 00:14:04,302 --> 00:14:05,929 - Hey, did you crush those midterms? 363 00:14:05,970 --> 00:14:08,390 - Yeah, I'm going to UCLA Law in the fall. 364 00:14:08,431 --> 00:14:10,684 - Oh, my God. Congrats. - Yeah, thanks. 365 00:14:10,725 --> 00:14:12,268 - So we're gonna see a lot more of you. 366 00:14:12,310 --> 00:14:14,312 - Yeah, a whole lot more. - Awesome. 367 00:14:14,354 --> 00:14:16,314 - "Crushed those midterms"? 368 00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,483 - So a sign of the times, I tried to put an ad 369 00:14:18,525 --> 00:14:21,820 on that hot true crime podcast, "Based on a True Story." 370 00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:23,029 - Hot. - Brilliant. 371 00:14:23,071 --> 00:14:24,239 - Such a hot show. 372 00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:26,241 - Is that not a genius idea? - Right? 373 00:14:26,282 --> 00:14:27,742 - Yeah. - Amazing. 374 00:14:27,784 --> 00:14:29,327 - Brilliant. - Yeah. 375 00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:31,055 - I love that. - Oh, my gosh, it gets me hot. 376 00:14:31,079 --> 00:14:32,330 - So brilliant. - It's so good. 377 00:14:32,372 --> 00:14:33,665 - I think it's fake. - Oh, yeah? 378 00:14:33,707 --> 00:14:36,418 - Yeah, like, the, um... The Orson Welles thing? 379 00:14:36,459 --> 00:14:37,585 - Uh, "War of the Worlds"? 380 00:14:37,627 --> 00:14:39,671 - It could be just street theater. 381 00:14:39,713 --> 00:14:41,798 - Absolutely not. Are you kidding me? 382 00:14:41,840 --> 00:14:43,133 You heard this guy's voice? 383 00:14:43,174 --> 00:14:44,759 That's a stabby voice. 384 00:14:44,801 --> 00:14:47,178 - What? - I buy it 100%. 385 00:14:47,220 --> 00:14:48,847 That guy is the killer. - Mm. 386 00:14:48,888 --> 00:14:51,307 - You should just ask them. - There's no chance. 387 00:14:51,349 --> 00:14:53,852 - Yeah. - You never talk to anybody. 388 00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:55,145 - Oh. - No, you... 389 00:14:55,186 --> 00:14:57,230 You email a shell corporation. 390 00:14:57,272 --> 00:14:58,773 You pay them in crypto. 391 00:14:58,815 --> 00:15:02,444 Nobody knows where they are or who they are. 392 00:15:02,485 --> 00:15:04,988 - Wow. - I wouldn't pay them a cent. 393 00:15:05,030 --> 00:15:07,866 Paul, the guy is killing people. 394 00:15:07,907 --> 00:15:09,659 - Okay, Richard. 395 00:15:09,701 --> 00:15:13,496 Last time I checked, there is still free speech in America. 396 00:15:13,538 --> 00:15:15,790 - Okay, even if that speech is about 397 00:15:15,832 --> 00:15:17,292 how you just killed someone? 398 00:15:17,334 --> 00:15:18,626 - Yeah, especially then. 399 00:15:18,668 --> 00:15:21,129 You... you wanna outlaw offensive speech? 400 00:15:21,171 --> 00:15:22,839 Who decides what goes on the list? 401 00:15:22,881 --> 00:15:24,382 Me? You? 402 00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:26,176 - I listen to it, and I think 403 00:15:26,217 --> 00:15:28,178 it's totally fucking disgusting. 404 00:15:28,219 --> 00:15:29,888 I think that you're right. 405 00:15:29,929 --> 00:15:31,514 I think that it's all true. 406 00:15:31,556 --> 00:15:33,141 I think he's a serial killer. 407 00:15:33,183 --> 00:15:35,018 And I think the people that are helping him 408 00:15:35,060 --> 00:15:36,644 are far worse than he is. 409 00:15:36,686 --> 00:15:38,563 - Oh. What people? - Preach, sister. 410 00:15:38,605 --> 00:15:39,856 - There's an interviewer. - Hm? 411 00:15:39,898 --> 00:15:41,417 - Don't say that. - Right? I mean, somebody... 412 00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:42,835 - No, that's not your word. - Has to be helping him. 413 00:15:42,859 --> 00:15:46,321 The Westside Ripper has some kind of brain defect, 414 00:15:46,363 --> 00:15:48,823 but these parasites are making money off of him. 415 00:15:48,865 --> 00:15:50,825 They should go to prison longer than he does. 416 00:15:50,867 --> 00:15:53,078 - That's a very good point. 417 00:15:53,119 --> 00:15:54,371 No, they really should. 418 00:15:54,412 --> 00:15:56,247 Think about it. - Mm. 419 00:15:56,289 --> 00:15:58,625 - I don't know. I... 420 00:15:58,667 --> 00:16:00,835 There's nothing wrong with makin' money. 421 00:16:00,877 --> 00:16:03,046 I love money. You love money. 422 00:16:03,088 --> 00:16:04,589 You love money. 423 00:16:04,631 --> 00:16:06,049 Money's great. 424 00:16:06,091 --> 00:16:07,384 Puts food on the table, 425 00:16:07,425 --> 00:16:09,386 puts our kids through school. 426 00:16:09,427 --> 00:16:11,513 Carlos loves money. Right? 427 00:16:11,554 --> 00:16:12,806 - What? 428 00:16:12,847 --> 00:16:15,058 - Can't open your gym on the East Coast 429 00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:17,310 without money, right? 430 00:16:17,352 --> 00:16:19,562 - Uh, it certainly would help, yeah. 431 00:16:19,604 --> 00:16:22,524 - Mm, guys, I think it's time 432 00:16:22,565 --> 00:16:24,734 to start bidding on the items, right? 433 00:16:24,776 --> 00:16:26,986 - I just wanna say I love Carlos' business plan. 434 00:16:27,028 --> 00:16:29,322 - Oh, my God. - And I... 435 00:16:29,364 --> 00:16:30,740 I want to invest in it. 436 00:16:30,782 --> 00:16:33,743 - Wait, you... you want to invest in my gym? 437 00:16:33,785 --> 00:16:37,914 - Yeah, I want to finance the whole thing by myself. 438 00:16:39,249 --> 00:16:40,417 - Well, that's... 439 00:16:40,458 --> 00:16:41,668 Wait, are you serious? 440 00:16:41,710 --> 00:16:42,919 - 100%. 441 00:16:42,961 --> 00:16:43,920 - Great. - Yeah? 442 00:16:43,962 --> 00:16:45,046 - When do we start? 443 00:16:46,965 --> 00:16:48,883 - Now. 444 00:16:48,925 --> 00:16:50,885 - What? 445 00:16:50,927 --> 00:16:52,762 - Now. 446 00:16:52,804 --> 00:16:54,055 Like, right now. 447 00:16:54,097 --> 00:16:55,223 Immediately. 448 00:16:56,766 --> 00:16:57,851 - Immediately? 449 00:16:57,892 --> 00:16:59,269 - He's joking. 450 00:16:59,310 --> 00:17:01,312 He's just... 451 00:17:01,354 --> 00:17:03,565 - Go pack a bag, 452 00:17:03,606 --> 00:17:05,025 go to LAX, 453 00:17:05,066 --> 00:17:07,819 get on the red-eye, go to New York, get to work. 454 00:17:07,861 --> 00:17:10,405 It's gonna take a couple of years. 455 00:17:10,447 --> 00:17:12,198 I'm gonna need you there the whole time 456 00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:14,826 overseeing construction, the plans, 457 00:17:14,868 --> 00:17:18,371 and you're not gonna be able to come back here ever. 458 00:17:23,835 --> 00:17:26,296 - Why you doing this? 459 00:17:26,338 --> 00:17:28,757 Hm? - Hm? 460 00:17:28,798 --> 00:17:30,884 - Why are you doing this right now? 461 00:17:30,925 --> 00:17:32,177 Is it 'cause I invited him? 462 00:17:32,218 --> 00:17:35,096 - What? 463 00:17:35,138 --> 00:17:36,639 I believe in Carlos. 464 00:17:36,681 --> 00:17:38,808 I like Carlos' business plan. 465 00:17:38,850 --> 00:17:41,936 Unless there's something that Carlos loves 466 00:17:41,978 --> 00:17:45,148 more than money here in LA. 467 00:17:45,190 --> 00:17:46,358 Then he should stay. 468 00:17:49,694 --> 00:17:51,654 Okay. 469 00:17:51,696 --> 00:17:55,450 I just transferred you $250,000. 470 00:17:55,492 --> 00:17:56,409 - What? 471 00:18:03,541 --> 00:18:04,918 - When I get my investment back, 472 00:18:04,959 --> 00:18:06,544 we'll go 50/50. 473 00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:09,381 If it works out, I'll finance a national rollout, 474 00:18:09,422 --> 00:18:12,384 but you gotta go right now. 475 00:18:20,392 --> 00:18:21,351 - You don't have to go. 476 00:18:21,393 --> 00:18:24,229 Babe, please, stay for me. 477 00:18:24,270 --> 00:18:25,730 - You gotta go, Carlos. 478 00:18:28,108 --> 00:18:29,275 - I'm sorry. 479 00:18:30,193 --> 00:18:32,153 - Oh. 480 00:18:44,541 --> 00:18:47,043 - Are you fucking insane? 481 00:18:51,297 --> 00:18:53,425 Why would you do that? 482 00:18:53,466 --> 00:18:55,885 Why the fuck do you even care? 483 00:18:59,264 --> 00:19:00,974 - God. 484 00:19:02,267 --> 00:19:03,435 - Hey, buddy. 485 00:19:03,476 --> 00:19:04,978 You got some interesting friends. 486 00:19:05,020 --> 00:19:08,398 - Okay, let's help some teen runaways! 487 00:19:10,108 --> 00:19:12,277 - Oh, my God. 488 00:19:12,318 --> 00:19:14,154 I cannot believe that happened. 489 00:19:15,697 --> 00:19:16,656 You okay? 490 00:19:16,698 --> 00:19:18,199 I know you really loved Carlos. 491 00:19:18,241 --> 00:19:19,743 - Oh, fuck Carlos. 492 00:19:19,784 --> 00:19:21,494 I never loved Carlos, 493 00:19:21,536 --> 00:19:24,664 but fuck him for leaving. 494 00:19:24,706 --> 00:19:28,251 - Well, I mean, we all know you're gonna be just fine. 495 00:19:28,293 --> 00:19:30,170 - Will I? - Yes. 496 00:19:30,211 --> 00:19:33,089 - 'Cause I feel like I'm pretty fucked right now. 497 00:19:33,131 --> 00:19:37,135 Ava, look at my life right now. 498 00:19:37,177 --> 00:19:38,720 Take a good look. 499 00:19:38,762 --> 00:19:41,097 You gotta let me in on the podcast. 500 00:19:41,139 --> 00:19:43,808 Okay? It's... it's literally all that I got. 501 00:19:45,852 --> 00:19:48,104 - Okay, uh, maybe we should talk about this another time. 502 00:19:48,146 --> 00:19:50,148 - No, no, no, 'cause... 'cause I can help you. 503 00:19:50,190 --> 00:19:52,359 You know, you... you know I'm great with marketing. 504 00:19:52,400 --> 00:19:54,944 Right? And branding, and I know this world. 505 00:19:54,986 --> 00:19:57,364 And we're the "Wine & Crime" girls, right? 506 00:19:57,405 --> 00:19:58,924 - Yeah, I can't do this. - Oh, well, I... 507 00:19:58,948 --> 00:20:00,825 Because do you remember that guy... 508 00:20:00,867 --> 00:20:02,762 That guy that I had a thing with in Cabo last year? 509 00:20:02,786 --> 00:20:05,205 'Cause he's huge at Wondery, 510 00:20:05,246 --> 00:20:06,331 and... and he's married, 511 00:20:06,373 --> 00:20:07,749 so he definitely owes me a solid. 512 00:20:07,791 --> 00:20:09,918 I can get him to make us a preemptive offer, 513 00:20:09,959 --> 00:20:12,629 you know, probably a really, really big one. 514 00:20:12,671 --> 00:20:14,255 - Oh, my God. - Yes. 515 00:20:14,297 --> 00:20:18,635 - So some guy is gonna make us a multimillion-dollar offer 516 00:20:18,677 --> 00:20:20,470 because he went down on you in Cabo? 517 00:20:20,512 --> 00:20:23,348 - Yeah, that is how the world works. 518 00:20:23,390 --> 00:20:25,225 How do you not know that? 519 00:20:25,266 --> 00:20:27,018 - Okay, just trust me. 520 00:20:27,060 --> 00:20:29,121 You shouldn't get involved in this 'cause it's a mess. 521 00:20:29,145 --> 00:20:30,480 - Okay, hold on. 522 00:20:30,522 --> 00:20:31,666 Don't come at me like you're my friend now. 523 00:20:31,690 --> 00:20:33,191 - What? - No, I know exactly 524 00:20:33,233 --> 00:20:34,776 what's going on. 525 00:20:34,818 --> 00:20:37,529 I mean, I know Matt's the killer. 526 00:20:37,570 --> 00:20:39,864 - I have no fucking idea what you're talking about. 527 00:20:39,906 --> 00:20:41,324 - Okay. 528 00:20:41,366 --> 00:20:42,909 So if I took Matt's wine glass 529 00:20:42,951 --> 00:20:44,661 and took it down to the police station, 530 00:20:44,703 --> 00:20:47,997 you're telling me that his DNA wouldn't be an exact match 531 00:20:48,039 --> 00:20:49,499 to the Westside Ripper? 532 00:20:52,711 --> 00:20:54,713 - If you tell a single person about this, 533 00:20:54,754 --> 00:20:57,465 I will fucking end you. 534 00:20:57,507 --> 00:20:59,092 - But I already told Simon. 535 00:21:00,510 --> 00:21:02,387 - What? - Yeah. 536 00:21:02,429 --> 00:21:04,389 I told him. - You told... 537 00:21:04,431 --> 00:21:06,016 You told Simon? Are you insane? 538 00:21:06,057 --> 00:21:08,351 Why would you do that? - Because he's a lawyer, 539 00:21:08,393 --> 00:21:09,769 and he will protect me! 540 00:21:09,811 --> 00:21:12,022 - Oh, my God. He's not gonna protect you. 541 00:21:12,063 --> 00:21:14,482 He fucking hates you. He hates everything about you! 542 00:21:14,524 --> 00:21:16,693 - Oh, sweetie. 543 00:21:16,735 --> 00:21:18,111 That's just married talk. 544 00:21:18,153 --> 00:21:19,672 - Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I can't believe 545 00:21:19,696 --> 00:21:21,239 you would be stupid enough 546 00:21:21,281 --> 00:21:22,782 to fucking tell Simon! 547 00:21:22,824 --> 00:21:25,160 - Oh, I absolutely am that stupid. 548 00:21:25,201 --> 00:21:26,703 And why not? 549 00:21:26,745 --> 00:21:29,914 I mean, it's worked pretty well for me so far, right? 550 00:21:29,956 --> 00:21:31,416 Tell me something. 551 00:21:31,458 --> 00:21:34,044 Who's the one living in a mansion 552 00:21:34,085 --> 00:21:36,880 in the Palisades, 553 00:21:36,921 --> 00:21:39,424 and who can't afford their mortgage in Mar Vista? 554 00:21:40,550 --> 00:21:42,093 - Okay, you listen to me, 555 00:21:42,135 --> 00:21:44,637 you with your little 400 calories a day, 556 00:21:44,679 --> 00:21:46,848 your cool sculpt, and your amazing blowjobs 557 00:21:46,890 --> 00:21:47,992 you can't stop bragging about... 558 00:21:48,016 --> 00:21:50,060 - They are amazing. - Well, 559 00:21:50,101 --> 00:21:52,729 not amazing enough to keep Carlos around. 560 00:21:52,771 --> 00:21:54,564 So if you wanna go steal 561 00:21:54,606 --> 00:21:56,399 the Westside Ripper's wine glass, 562 00:21:56,441 --> 00:21:57,859 good fucking luck. 563 00:21:57,901 --> 00:21:58,985 - Fuck you. 564 00:21:59,027 --> 00:22:00,737 Fuck you, 'cause Nathan will bring me in 565 00:22:00,779 --> 00:22:03,573 'cause he is nothing like you! 566 00:22:03,615 --> 00:22:05,575 He will cut me in! 567 00:22:05,617 --> 00:22:08,119 And my blowjobs are the fucking best! 568 00:22:09,371 --> 00:22:12,415 Everyone in LA knows it... 569 00:22:12,457 --> 00:22:13,750 and Dubai. 570 00:22:18,171 --> 00:22:19,482 - 900, $900. Ladies and gentlemen, 571 00:22:19,506 --> 00:22:20,775 it would be a dream within a dream 572 00:22:20,799 --> 00:22:22,676 if we got to $1,000. 573 00:22:22,717 --> 00:22:25,470 Do I hear 1, $1,000 574 00:22:25,512 --> 00:22:26,721 for the Edgar Allan Poe brick. 575 00:22:26,763 --> 00:22:27,990 How 'bout a 1,200? Who'll do a 1,200? 576 00:22:28,014 --> 00:22:29,450 There's a fan of blood and murder for 1,200. 577 00:22:29,474 --> 00:22:31,267 - Hey, can I talk to you for a second? 578 00:22:31,309 --> 00:22:33,204 - Hold on, these fuckers are trying to steal your brick. 579 00:22:33,228 --> 00:22:34,646 - $1,300. - Okay, but... 580 00:22:34,688 --> 00:22:37,357 I need you for one second. 581 00:22:37,399 --> 00:22:39,043 - We're gonna lose the brick. - I don't care. 582 00:22:39,067 --> 00:22:40,735 Just come on. 583 00:22:40,777 --> 00:22:42,088 So here's the thing... Don't panic 584 00:22:42,112 --> 00:22:43,798 when I tell you this... But I lost the burner. 585 00:22:43,822 --> 00:22:44,781 - What? - I got it back, 586 00:22:44,823 --> 00:22:45,841 but I dropped it in Vegas, 587 00:22:45,865 --> 00:22:47,242 and then Ruby, she found it, 588 00:22:47,283 --> 00:22:48,386 and now she's blackmailing... - Oh, my fucking God. 589 00:22:48,410 --> 00:22:49,327 - Us and wants in on everything. 590 00:22:49,369 --> 00:22:50,495 - Ruby? - Yes. 591 00:22:50,537 --> 00:22:51,413 - How did you not know you dropped it? 592 00:22:51,454 --> 00:22:52,414 - It was an accident! Okay? 593 00:22:52,455 --> 00:22:53,498 We had been using yours. 594 00:22:53,540 --> 00:22:54,642 I barely use mine. I thought it was 595 00:22:54,666 --> 00:22:55,875 in my bag, but it fell out. 596 00:22:55,917 --> 00:22:57,353 I know I fucked up, but she knows everything. 597 00:22:57,377 --> 00:22:59,170 She knows that Matt is the Westside Ripper, 598 00:22:59,212 --> 00:23:01,131 and she told me that she told Simon. 599 00:23:01,172 --> 00:23:03,883 - She told Simon? - Well, she might be bluffing. 600 00:23:03,925 --> 00:23:05,653 I don't fuckin' know, but... - This is fine. It's fine. 601 00:23:05,677 --> 00:23:06,862 We're gonna figure this out. 602 00:23:06,886 --> 00:23:08,138 But this place is toxic. 603 00:23:08,179 --> 00:23:09,782 Okay? I'm telling you, it's fucking toxic. 604 00:23:09,806 --> 00:23:12,017 They're nuts. I'm taking McEnroe outta here. 605 00:23:12,058 --> 00:23:13,953 - Babe, who fucking cares about the dog right now? 606 00:23:13,977 --> 00:23:15,478 Just forget the fuckin' dog. 607 00:23:15,520 --> 00:23:17,063 We have bigger problems. 608 00:23:18,565 --> 00:23:20,025 What? What? - Oh, shit. 609 00:23:20,066 --> 00:23:23,069 Alba, she just came out against us. 610 00:23:23,111 --> 00:23:24,279 - No, not Alba. 611 00:23:24,320 --> 00:23:25,530 - Jessica Alba just tweeted, 612 00:23:25,572 --> 00:23:27,907 "If #BasedOnATrueStory is true, it's sickening. 613 00:23:27,949 --> 00:23:29,427 "If it's fake, it might be even worse. 614 00:23:29,451 --> 00:23:30,720 "America, we're better than this. 615 00:23:30,744 --> 00:23:33,455 #CancelBasedOnATrueStory." 616 00:23:33,496 --> 00:23:35,040 - Oh, no, oh, no, oh, no. 617 00:23:35,081 --> 00:23:36,958 Okay, oh, fuck, fuck, fuck. Oh, my God. 618 00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:37,959 Okay, maybe it's not gonna track. 619 00:23:38,001 --> 00:23:39,627 Maybe no one's gonna pick this up. 620 00:23:39,669 --> 00:23:42,047 - Oh, shit. Malia Obama just retweeted it. 621 00:23:43,089 --> 00:23:45,050 - Oh, my God, so did Tom Hanks. 622 00:23:45,091 --> 00:23:47,260 - Kylie Jenner. - Oh, my God. 623 00:23:47,302 --> 00:23:49,137 So did Dame Judi Dench. 624 00:23:49,179 --> 00:23:51,056 - Oh, I'm so sorry, babe. - Oh, my God. 625 00:23:51,097 --> 00:23:53,558 - I know you love her. - Are you seeing this shit? 626 00:23:53,600 --> 00:23:54,785 - Yes. - We're gonna get canceled? 627 00:23:54,809 --> 00:23:56,811 Alba fucked us. - Okay, is there anyone 628 00:23:56,853 --> 00:23:57,896 that's for us? 629 00:23:57,937 --> 00:23:59,481 - For us? Um... - Who is? Look. 630 00:23:59,522 --> 00:24:00,732 - Kanye? - Okay, Kanye? 631 00:24:00,774 --> 00:24:02,192 - Ugh, that's not good. 632 00:24:02,233 --> 00:24:03,234 - The dude from NXIVM. 633 00:24:03,276 --> 00:24:04,527 - Josh Duggar? 634 00:24:04,569 --> 00:24:05,862 - Jared from Subway. 635 00:24:05,904 --> 00:24:07,131 - That's not good. - That's bad. 636 00:24:07,155 --> 00:24:08,198 - No. 637 00:24:08,239 --> 00:24:09,908 - This is fuckin' awful. 638 00:24:09,949 --> 00:24:11,076 - There goes iTunes. 639 00:24:11,117 --> 00:24:12,410 - We lost iTunes? - Yes. 640 00:24:12,452 --> 00:24:13,536 - Okay. 641 00:24:13,578 --> 00:24:14,805 Okay, here's what we're gonna do. 642 00:24:14,829 --> 00:24:16,331 You and me, we're gettin' outta here. 643 00:24:16,373 --> 00:24:17,933 We're takin' the dog. We'll call you from the road. 644 00:24:17,957 --> 00:24:19,376 - You're taking the fucking dog? 645 00:24:19,417 --> 00:24:20,436 Our brand is under attack. 646 00:24:20,460 --> 00:24:21,711 We gotta act now. 647 00:24:21,753 --> 00:24:23,588 Here's our play, okay? 648 00:24:23,630 --> 00:24:25,131 The snowflakes can suck it. 649 00:24:25,173 --> 00:24:27,676 We're gonna double down just like our fans want. 650 00:24:27,717 --> 00:24:29,010 I'm gonna go out tonight... - No. 651 00:24:29,052 --> 00:24:31,888 - And I will... - We are not doing that, okay? 652 00:24:31,930 --> 00:24:33,783 We have to do something, but we are not doing that. 653 00:24:33,807 --> 00:24:34,766 You guys, if we don't do something, 654 00:24:34,808 --> 00:24:37,102 we are gonna lose the Spotify deal. 655 00:24:37,143 --> 00:24:38,812 Do you understand? So what do we do? 656 00:24:38,853 --> 00:24:40,438 - Wait, wait. Hold on a second. 657 00:24:40,480 --> 00:24:41,648 Wait a minute. Doesn't... 658 00:24:41,690 --> 00:24:44,818 doesn't Ruby know Alba? 659 00:24:44,859 --> 00:24:47,070 - Yes. You know what? She was her body double 660 00:24:47,112 --> 00:24:48,363 in "Spy Kids 4." 661 00:24:48,405 --> 00:24:49,590 - Remember, she had the wig and the costume on 662 00:24:49,614 --> 00:24:50,782 one night after shooting? 663 00:24:50,824 --> 00:24:52,409 - She loves to hold that over me. 664 00:24:52,450 --> 00:24:53,618 - She went down on Kid Rock. 665 00:24:53,660 --> 00:24:54,869 Someone took a photo. - Yeah. 666 00:24:54,911 --> 00:24:56,705 - Why don't we get Ruby to tell Alba 667 00:24:56,746 --> 00:24:58,456 that we'll release the fuckin' photo 668 00:24:58,498 --> 00:24:59,791 unless she pulls the post? 669 00:24:59,833 --> 00:25:00,959 - Why would Alba care? 670 00:25:01,001 --> 00:25:02,127 It's not her in the picture. 671 00:25:02,168 --> 00:25:03,920 - It doesn't matter. It looks like her. 672 00:25:03,962 --> 00:25:05,802 - No, the tweet's out there. It's taken flight. 673 00:25:05,839 --> 00:25:07,007 - You go talk to Ruby. 674 00:25:07,048 --> 00:25:08,299 I'll find out what Simon knows. 675 00:25:08,341 --> 00:25:10,593 - Ruby's not gonna do shit for us right now. 676 00:25:10,635 --> 00:25:12,637 Trust me. - It's all we fuckin' got, 677 00:25:12,679 --> 00:25:14,180 guys. Let's go. Go. 678 00:25:14,222 --> 00:25:16,474 Big man, everyone! 679 00:25:17,517 --> 00:25:19,310 Big fuckin' man. 680 00:25:19,352 --> 00:25:22,397 What kind of control freak buys his wife's boyfriend, huh? 681 00:25:22,439 --> 00:25:23,958 - You're the one who invited him, honey, 682 00:25:23,982 --> 00:25:25,126 in front of all of our friends. 683 00:25:25,150 --> 00:25:26,693 - Yeah, you know why? You know why? 684 00:25:26,735 --> 00:25:29,029 'Cause you can't get it up unless you call me "Mommy." 685 00:25:29,070 --> 00:25:30,989 Do you guys know that? What's up with that? 686 00:25:31,031 --> 00:25:33,324 You miss sucking on Mommy's titties, huh? 687 00:25:33,366 --> 00:25:35,827 - Yes! Yes, I do! 688 00:25:35,869 --> 00:25:37,287 You know what? I actually like 689 00:25:37,328 --> 00:25:39,622 sucking Mom's tits better than yours! 690 00:25:39,664 --> 00:25:41,207 - Guys, that's not great 691 00:25:41,249 --> 00:25:42,625 for the dog. - Or anyone. 692 00:25:42,667 --> 00:25:45,962 - Even if I stitched Michael Fassbender's foreskin 693 00:25:46,004 --> 00:25:47,881 onto Orlando Bloom's dick... 694 00:25:47,922 --> 00:25:50,008 And Frankensteined the perfect penis, 695 00:25:50,050 --> 00:25:51,926 I still couldn't get it up for you! 696 00:25:51,968 --> 00:25:53,303 - Are you gonna finally stroke out 697 00:25:53,345 --> 00:25:56,014 and leave me with all your daddy's money, huh? 698 00:25:56,056 --> 00:25:59,768 - Come on. Come on, McEnroe. Come on. 699 00:25:59,809 --> 00:26:02,979 Okay, stay here, and stay quiet. 700 00:26:03,021 --> 00:26:04,415 I'm gonna get you outta here tonight. 701 00:26:04,439 --> 00:26:05,482 Okay? Yeah. 702 00:26:05,523 --> 00:26:07,025 - You think that hurt me? 703 00:26:07,067 --> 00:26:08,860 You think sending him away hurt me? 704 00:26:08,902 --> 00:26:10,212 - Okay! - You can't fucking hurt me. 705 00:26:10,236 --> 00:26:11,796 - What do you want? You want the spa day 706 00:26:11,821 --> 00:26:13,114 at the Peninsula, honey, huh? 707 00:26:13,156 --> 00:26:14,324 Do you want the deep tissue? 708 00:26:14,366 --> 00:26:16,034 Do you want me to buy that for you? 709 00:26:16,076 --> 00:26:17,744 - You're gonna continue to buy my love! 710 00:26:17,786 --> 00:26:19,245 You're a fucking monster, 711 00:26:19,287 --> 00:26:21,247 and you've never loved anything 712 00:26:21,289 --> 00:26:24,000 in your entire life except that dog! 713 00:26:24,042 --> 00:26:26,378 That's it! How pathetic is that, everyone? 714 00:26:26,419 --> 00:26:28,880 - So now it's the dog's fault? - Oh, sure! 715 00:26:28,922 --> 00:26:30,191 Yeah, it's the dog's fault! 716 00:26:30,215 --> 00:26:32,008 Sure, it's the fucking dog's fault! 717 00:26:32,050 --> 00:26:33,343 - You want me to shut the dog up? 718 00:26:33,385 --> 00:26:35,178 - Yeah, go shut the fucking dog up! 719 00:26:35,220 --> 00:26:37,055 - Okay. I'll shut the fucking dog up! 720 00:26:37,097 --> 00:26:38,056 - Do you need Mommy's help? 721 00:26:38,098 --> 00:26:39,808 You think you can handle that? 722 00:26:39,849 --> 00:26:40,767 You got that, hon? 723 00:26:40,809 --> 00:26:42,394 Goddamn it! 724 00:26:42,435 --> 00:26:44,813 - Hey, I know this is a terrible time. 725 00:26:44,854 --> 00:26:46,731 I'm so sorry, but, um, you're friends 726 00:26:46,773 --> 00:26:48,024 with Jessica Alba, right? 727 00:26:48,066 --> 00:26:49,818 - Yeah. - You are? 728 00:26:49,859 --> 00:26:52,028 - Yeah, she's really sweet, actually. 729 00:26:52,070 --> 00:26:54,072 - Um... - Fuck off and die! 730 00:26:55,198 --> 00:26:56,199 - Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 731 00:26:56,241 --> 00:26:57,909 Oh, my God. Oh, no. 732 00:26:57,951 --> 00:26:59,369 - No. 733 00:26:59,411 --> 00:27:01,246 - What's he doing? - Someone... 734 00:27:01,287 --> 00:27:03,081 - No, no, no, no, no, no, no. 735 00:27:03,123 --> 00:27:04,833 - Uh... - No, you should stay here. 736 00:27:06,292 --> 00:27:07,752 - Wait... 737 00:27:07,794 --> 00:27:09,087 - He's got a gun. 738 00:27:09,129 --> 00:27:10,272 - He's got a gun. - Oh, my God. 739 00:27:10,296 --> 00:27:11,840 - Oh, my God. 740 00:27:11,881 --> 00:27:12,841 - Watch out. Watch out! 741 00:27:12,882 --> 00:27:15,051 - Oh, my God. 742 00:27:15,093 --> 00:27:16,720 - What did you do? 743 00:27:18,805 --> 00:27:20,432 - I shut the dog up. 744 00:27:22,267 --> 00:27:24,894 - Oh, no. 745 00:27:27,772 --> 00:27:29,315 - I shut it up. 746 00:27:29,357 --> 00:27:30,608 - Oh, my God. 747 00:27:30,650 --> 00:27:32,610 - Simon, please put that down. 748 00:27:34,654 --> 00:27:37,490 What the fuck did you... - I shut the fucking dog up 749 00:27:37,532 --> 00:27:39,409 is what I did. 750 00:27:45,957 --> 00:27:49,294 - Okay, easy, please. Please, please. 751 00:27:49,336 --> 00:27:53,298 No, no, no. 752 00:28:05,935 --> 00:28:09,981 - I'm gonna come around you, okay? 753 00:28:10,023 --> 00:28:15,320 Hey. Just focus on me. 754 00:28:15,362 --> 00:28:17,530 All right? 755 00:28:17,572 --> 00:28:20,450 That's good. That's good. 756 00:28:20,492 --> 00:28:24,496 Man, you must be in shock. 757 00:28:27,707 --> 00:28:30,502 You're not a bad person. 758 00:28:30,543 --> 00:28:34,422 We all have anger in us. 759 00:28:34,464 --> 00:28:36,841 I know. It's okay. 760 00:28:36,883 --> 00:28:38,051 It's okay. It's all right. 761 00:28:38,093 --> 00:28:39,594 It's good. Yeah, yeah. That's good. 762 00:28:39,636 --> 00:28:40,595 You don't wanna do this. 763 00:28:40,637 --> 00:28:42,889 Yeah. That's good. 764 00:28:42,931 --> 00:28:44,849 - McEnroe! 765 00:28:47,185 --> 00:28:48,853 - Okay, Tory. - You all right? 766 00:28:48,895 --> 00:28:50,021 - I got you. 767 00:28:50,063 --> 00:28:51,022 - I got you. 768 00:28:51,064 --> 00:28:52,357 - He just lost his mind? 769 00:28:52,399 --> 00:28:55,860 - Oh, no! 770 00:28:55,902 --> 00:28:57,696 - I'm so sorry. 771 00:30:12,604 --> 00:30:14,105 - Nice shot, Dad. 54067

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