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1
00:00:01,740 --> 00:00:03,740
Anyway, we get
to the end of the date,
2
00:00:03,740 --> 00:00:05,070
and I'm waiting for him
to kiss me,
3
00:00:05,070 --> 00:00:07,540
and all he offers
was a fist bump.
4
00:00:08,910 --> 00:00:10,350
So, what did you do?
5
00:00:10,350 --> 00:00:12,980
I punched it in.
6
00:00:14,050 --> 00:00:16,790
Maybe I should have
cosmetic surgery
7
00:00:16,790 --> 00:00:18,920
to look more like that!
8
00:00:18,920 --> 00:00:23,530
Oh, I don't think
that's a good or possible idea.
9
00:00:23,530 --> 00:00:27,230
I'd do anything
to have a body like hers.
10
00:00:27,230 --> 00:00:29,630
Whoa! Hold up,
hors d'oeuvre man.
11
00:00:30,520 --> 00:00:34,490
Mm, tsk, thank you.
12
00:00:34,490 --> 00:00:36,840
These are to die for.
13
00:00:36,840 --> 00:00:40,240
I will take your word for it.
14
00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:43,610
I'm starting to think
I'm never gonna get a husband!
15
00:00:43,610 --> 00:00:46,200
Well, just...
16
00:00:46,200 --> 00:00:48,950
Don't put so much pressure
on yourself.
17
00:00:48,950 --> 00:00:51,950
I mean, don't look at every man
as a potential husband.
18
00:00:51,950 --> 00:00:53,190
I guess you're right.
19
00:00:53,190 --> 00:00:56,160
I shouldn't be so focused
on being Liz the wife.
20
00:00:56,160 --> 00:00:58,660
- There you go.
- I should just have fun.
21
00:00:58,660 --> 00:01:01,400
I mean, I'm not gonna look
like this forever.
22
00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:07,370
I have some crudite
on my left breast.
23
00:01:07,370 --> 00:01:10,940
It actually goes with the dip
that's on your right one.
24
00:01:18,610 --> 00:01:21,350
Oh, my God.
25
00:01:21,350 --> 00:01:23,020
What?
26
00:01:24,120 --> 00:01:26,820
Look at me.
27
00:01:29,330 --> 00:01:33,500
I am...Art.
28
00:01:33,500 --> 00:01:35,930
How on earth
did that thing get into this--
29
00:01:35,930 --> 00:01:38,730
- shh, shh, shh.
30
00:01:38,730 --> 00:01:40,940
Just drink it in.
31
00:02:10,920 --> 00:02:14,760
Wait, you actually
bought a copy?
32
00:02:14,760 --> 00:02:18,790
I, uh, happen to believe
that it was underpriced.
33
00:02:18,790 --> 00:02:21,530
This thing's
gonna appreciate like crazy.
34
00:02:21,530 --> 00:02:23,700
You know what, I think
I remember that picture.
35
00:02:23,700 --> 00:02:25,930
It was on the cover
of Honcho Magazine.
36
00:02:25,930 --> 00:02:28,170
What's Honcho Magazine?
37
00:02:28,170 --> 00:02:30,470
I'm so straight, I don't
even get my own references.
38
00:02:31,710 --> 00:02:33,270
So how did this happen?
39
00:02:33,270 --> 00:02:34,780
Well, in college this, uh,
photographer asked,
40
00:02:34,780 --> 00:02:36,180
uh, me to model for him.
41
00:02:36,180 --> 00:02:37,930
Um, I guess
he's become a big deal,
42
00:02:44,350 --> 00:02:46,650
I mean, flat stomach,
taut, sculpted muscles,
43
00:02:46,650 --> 00:02:49,490
this faraway look in your eyes.
44
00:02:50,360 --> 00:02:51,990
What were you thinking about?
45
00:02:53,900 --> 00:02:56,160
Probably his
upcoming audition for wham!
46
00:02:56,160 --> 00:02:57,660
What's wham!?
I don't get it.
47
00:02:57,670 --> 00:02:59,330
I'm sorry,
48
00:02:59,330 --> 00:03:02,400
what art gallery
is your picture hanging in?
49
00:03:03,570 --> 00:03:04,700
It's not in galleries.
50
00:03:04,710 --> 00:03:07,040
It's on telephone poles
near schools and parks.
51
00:03:09,930 --> 00:03:11,880
All this thing does
is remind you
52
00:03:11,880 --> 00:03:13,580
that you don't
look like this anymore.
53
00:03:13,580 --> 00:03:16,020
Yeah. You know,
I mean, you're, like, okay now,
54
00:03:16,020 --> 00:03:20,650
but here you were just
a fantastic physical specimen.
55
00:03:20,660 --> 00:03:23,790
I'm still pretty close
to that, right, huh?
56
00:03:23,790 --> 00:03:25,430
Yeah.
57
00:03:26,330 --> 00:03:27,660
Except instead
of a six-pack,
58
00:03:27,660 --> 00:03:29,260
you have more of a keg
in there.
59
00:03:31,000 --> 00:03:33,400
I mean, I mean,
you were--
60
00:03:33,400 --> 00:03:36,240
you were hot, man.
61
00:03:36,240 --> 00:03:37,700
You've got the ripped abs,
62
00:03:37,710 --> 00:03:39,140
the lats, the delts,
63
00:03:39,140 --> 00:03:42,180
just the right amount
of chest hair.
64
00:03:42,180 --> 00:03:44,080
Heads up, Audrey.
65
00:03:44,080 --> 00:03:46,380
I think he wants
a piece of your husband.
66
00:03:47,180 --> 00:03:49,020
No way.
67
00:03:49,020 --> 00:03:51,590
Not this one.
68
00:04:08,970 --> 00:04:10,840
Ow.
69
00:04:10,840 --> 00:04:12,690
Ah!
What happened?
70
00:04:12,690 --> 00:04:14,740
I--I tried to take a picture
of myself in the mirror,
71
00:04:14,740 --> 00:04:16,610
and I got blinded.
72
00:04:16,610 --> 00:04:19,410
Honey, we've talked
about how a mirror works.
73
00:04:21,370 --> 00:04:22,670
You know, honey,
I think we should have
74
00:04:22,670 --> 00:04:24,480
a professional photo
taken of us.
75
00:04:24,490 --> 00:04:25,870
Why?
76
00:04:25,870 --> 00:04:27,590
Well, Jeff had one of himself
when he was in his prime,
77
00:04:27,590 --> 00:04:29,870
you know, and he
was in such good shape,
78
00:04:29,870 --> 00:04:31,690
and his hair
was tousled just right.
79
00:04:31,690 --> 00:04:33,590
Okay, okay,
Audrey warned me about this.
80
00:04:33,590 --> 00:04:35,600
Well, I just think we should
have a picture of ourselves
81
00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:37,400
in our prime, you know?
82
00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:40,300
I mean, looks fade,
wrinkles start to appear,
83
00:04:40,300 --> 00:04:42,470
things start sagging.
84
00:04:43,550 --> 00:04:47,040
I might not
look as good either.
85
00:04:48,140 --> 00:04:50,410
Adam, we are gonna age
just fine.
86
00:04:50,410 --> 00:04:51,510
I'm just saying.
87
00:04:51,510 --> 00:04:54,680
We've both seen your mom.
88
00:04:55,620 --> 00:04:57,350
Hey, my mom is...
89
00:04:57,350 --> 00:04:59,820
I mean, she's...
90
00:04:59,820 --> 00:05:03,120
Yeah, a picture might be nice.
91
00:05:13,870 --> 00:05:15,700
Hey.
92
00:05:15,700 --> 00:05:17,540
What are you doing?
93
00:05:17,540 --> 00:05:20,140
I'm juicing up a health drink.
94
00:05:20,140 --> 00:05:23,080
Juice? Health?
95
00:05:23,080 --> 00:05:25,180
You don't know those words.
96
00:05:25,180 --> 00:05:26,650
I do now.
97
00:05:26,650 --> 00:05:28,650
I got whey protein,
pure wheatgrass,
98
00:05:28,650 --> 00:05:30,550
and seaweed extract in here.
99
00:05:30,550 --> 00:05:32,390
I'm getting back to that.
100
00:05:34,120 --> 00:05:36,860
How many of those things
did you buy?
101
00:05:38,090 --> 00:05:40,490
Um, babe,
why are you doing this?
102
00:05:40,490 --> 00:05:43,830
For the art-loving public.
103
00:05:45,200 --> 00:05:46,970
And when did we get a juicer?
104
00:05:46,970 --> 00:05:48,920
Uh, last night
on the way home from the gym.
105
00:05:48,920 --> 00:05:50,540
It's pretty powerful too.
106
00:05:50,540 --> 00:05:53,340
Look, our wooden spoon.
107
00:05:57,240 --> 00:05:59,250
It's a little splintery.
108
00:06:06,850 --> 00:06:09,760
Oh, thanks
for inviting me along, sir.
109
00:06:09,760 --> 00:06:12,030
Well, I've been in
a little bit of a slump.
110
00:06:12,030 --> 00:06:13,990
I thought you might be helpful.
111
00:06:14,000 --> 00:06:15,110
Oh, well, then I'm, uh,
112
00:06:15,110 --> 00:06:16,700
honored to be
your moral support.
113
00:06:16,700 --> 00:06:18,060
Yeah.
You just stand there
114
00:06:18,070 --> 00:06:19,930
looking skinny,
poor, and geeky.
115
00:06:19,930 --> 00:06:23,670
It'll highlight
that the alternative is avail.
116
00:06:23,670 --> 00:06:26,410
And you're welcome
for paying your cover charge.
117
00:06:26,410 --> 00:06:28,380
Let's not
live in the past, Tim.
118
00:06:28,380 --> 00:06:31,280
We gotta find out which one of
these delightful young ladies
119
00:06:31,280 --> 00:06:33,080
I'm gonna wear like a belt.
120
00:06:33,080 --> 00:06:35,620
You find a lot of ways
to say the same thing
121
00:06:35,620 --> 00:06:36,950
over and over again.
122
00:06:38,890 --> 00:06:41,420
Hey, could you do me a favor?
123
00:06:42,560 --> 00:06:44,720
Looks like the decisions
have been made for me.
124
00:06:46,930 --> 00:06:50,030
Hi, I'm Russell.
You've chosen wisely.
125
00:06:50,030 --> 00:06:52,470
- My name is dawn.
- Oh, as in, uh--
126
00:06:52,470 --> 00:06:54,630
- cue the crack of joke.
127
00:06:56,400 --> 00:06:58,610
This creepy guy
is hitting on me...
128
00:06:58,610 --> 00:06:59,640
Mm.
129
00:06:59,640 --> 00:07:01,410
Can you sit here
so he gets the hint?
130
00:07:01,410 --> 00:07:03,980
Of course I could.
131
00:07:03,980 --> 00:07:06,250
Oh, my God,
I love this band.
132
00:07:06,250 --> 00:07:07,850
I know!
133
00:07:07,850 --> 00:07:11,150
I really like them
and what they do.
134
00:07:11,150 --> 00:07:12,590
What's your favorite
song of theirs?
135
00:07:12,590 --> 00:07:14,320
That's a tough one.
136
00:07:14,320 --> 00:07:18,540
I would maybe say
the first song on side two.
137
00:07:18,540 --> 00:07:20,880
What's a side two?
138
00:07:20,880 --> 00:07:24,530
Who knows? I'm too busy
tweeting my besties!
139
00:07:24,530 --> 00:07:28,890
- Oh, hey, sorry.
- Oh, sorry, dude.
140
00:07:28,890 --> 00:07:30,770
My father here just found me,
141
00:07:30,770 --> 00:07:32,410
and he's really mad
142
00:07:32,410 --> 00:07:35,110
because I'm supposed
to be grounded.
143
00:07:35,110 --> 00:07:37,080
I'm really sorry, dad.
144
00:07:39,510 --> 00:07:41,250
Thank you so much, sir.
145
00:07:41,250 --> 00:07:43,120
Yeah, I'm happy to, uh...
146
00:07:43,120 --> 00:07:45,820
Help.
147
00:07:49,290 --> 00:07:50,490
Sir?
148
00:07:51,340 --> 00:07:53,080
Dad?
149
00:07:53,080 --> 00:07:54,460
Look on the bright side.
150
00:07:54,460 --> 00:07:56,830
She could have reasonably
gone grandpa.
151
00:07:56,830 --> 00:07:58,970
Dude, I took you out here
152
00:07:58,970 --> 00:08:01,030
thinking you
could help my slump,
153
00:08:01,040 --> 00:08:03,140
but instead I'm watching
my strikeout reflected
154
00:08:03,140 --> 00:08:06,270
in those hubble telescopes
you call glasses.
155
00:08:06,270 --> 00:08:09,640
Sir, why not try learning
a lesson from this
156
00:08:09,640 --> 00:08:12,450
and graduate from dating girls
to dating women?
157
00:08:12,450 --> 00:08:14,650
You might be right, Tim.
158
00:08:14,650 --> 00:08:17,050
She was flat.
159
00:08:17,050 --> 00:08:19,590
I meant someone
a little more mature.
160
00:08:19,590 --> 00:08:21,690
Someone who might know
what side two means.
161
00:08:21,690 --> 00:08:22,860
Eh...
162
00:08:22,860 --> 00:08:24,220
For instance,
163
00:08:24,220 --> 00:08:25,590
and may she one day forgive me
164
00:08:25,590 --> 00:08:27,130
for bringing her
to your attention,
165
00:08:27,130 --> 00:08:28,560
this woman over here.
166
00:08:32,270 --> 00:08:34,900
All right.
I'll do it.
167
00:08:34,900 --> 00:08:36,170
All right.
168
00:08:36,170 --> 00:08:39,070
I'll do a little
charity work tonight.
169
00:08:39,070 --> 00:08:41,010
Get me out on my slump.
170
00:08:41,010 --> 00:08:43,410
By the way,
she's not gonna forgive you.
171
00:08:44,510 --> 00:08:47,350
Hey there. I thought
I'd boot-scoot over here
172
00:08:47,350 --> 00:08:48,750
and buy you a drink.
173
00:08:48,750 --> 00:08:50,580
How about them apples?
174
00:08:50,580 --> 00:08:53,090
Sorry, I'm a lesbian.
175
00:08:53,090 --> 00:08:55,190
Whoa. Really?
176
00:08:55,190 --> 00:08:58,090
Effective immediately.
177
00:08:59,860 --> 00:09:01,230
Ah.
178
00:09:03,600 --> 00:09:06,230
Here you go.
Another scotch.
179
00:09:06,230 --> 00:09:07,480
Hey, thanks, Doreen.
180
00:09:07,490 --> 00:09:10,240
Um, can I ask you a question?
181
00:09:10,240 --> 00:09:13,660
Yeah, they're real.
182
00:09:16,010 --> 00:09:17,680
No, that's not
what I was gonna ask.
183
00:09:17,680 --> 00:09:19,480
I, uh...
184
00:09:19,480 --> 00:09:20,910
Wow, all right,
I can't remember.
185
00:09:20,920 --> 00:09:22,180
I'm sorry.
186
00:09:22,180 --> 00:09:24,650
And what can I get you?
187
00:09:24,650 --> 00:09:26,350
What is the healthiest thing
on the menu?
188
00:09:26,350 --> 00:09:28,860
Nothing.
189
00:09:30,790 --> 00:09:33,860
Hey, what's wrong?
Why the orange face?
190
00:09:35,160 --> 00:09:36,530
Just...
191
00:09:36,530 --> 00:09:40,070
Can't seem to break out
of the slump with the ladies.
192
00:09:40,070 --> 00:09:42,770
Still? You just gotta
hang in there.
193
00:09:42,770 --> 00:09:44,100
Get back on the horse.
194
00:09:44,100 --> 00:09:47,710
I'm sick
of paying for it, though.
195
00:09:51,550 --> 00:09:52,650
Horse.
196
00:09:52,650 --> 00:09:55,520
I said horse.
197
00:09:55,520 --> 00:09:56,920
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
198
00:09:56,920 --> 00:09:58,080
Speaking of, here comes Liz.
199
00:09:58,090 --> 00:10:00,590
Do not leave me alone with her.
200
00:10:00,590 --> 00:10:01,750
Stay here.
201
00:10:01,760 --> 00:10:03,210
Okay, okay.
202
00:10:04,490 --> 00:10:07,460
Hi, Jeffrey.
203
00:10:07,460 --> 00:10:08,930
Russell, right?
Yup.
204
00:10:08,930 --> 00:10:10,660
Anyways, I gotta get back
to my jogging,
205
00:10:10,660 --> 00:10:12,130
so I'll see ya.
206
00:10:16,940 --> 00:10:19,340
- Mm.
207
00:10:19,340 --> 00:10:21,470
Well, that's it. I gotta run.
Uh, it was good--
208
00:10:21,480 --> 00:10:23,180
- here you go.
209
00:10:24,360 --> 00:10:27,150
I ordered food.
What a space cadet.
210
00:10:27,150 --> 00:10:29,020
Doreen, could I
get maybe one more?
211
00:10:29,020 --> 00:10:30,650
And make it a double.
212
00:10:30,650 --> 00:10:34,040
You know what?
Make it two doubles.
213
00:10:42,730 --> 00:10:46,370
Nice work, lover.
214
00:10:46,370 --> 00:10:48,700
Uh-huh.
215
00:11:31,810 --> 00:11:33,950
What are you, uh...
216
00:11:33,950 --> 00:11:36,250
I left you with...
Ehh...
217
00:11:36,250 --> 00:11:39,690
You're wearing the same...
218
00:11:39,690 --> 00:11:40,920
Oh, no!
219
00:11:40,920 --> 00:11:44,160
- Please don't tell anyone.
- Come on, man!
220
00:11:44,160 --> 00:11:45,780
It was a mistake.
I was drinking, man.
221
00:11:45,780 --> 00:11:48,590
Liz?
Is there enough booze?
222
00:11:48,600 --> 00:11:50,450
Look...
I was in that slump--
223
00:11:50,450 --> 00:11:53,770
- no! No excuses!
You did a bad thing!
224
00:11:53,770 --> 00:11:56,200
I--I can fix this, man.
225
00:11:56,200 --> 00:11:58,740
Look, I'm not gonna
take her calls,
226
00:11:58,740 --> 00:12:00,240
and I'll avoid your building.
227
00:12:00,240 --> 00:12:01,740
She'll get the hint, buddy,
228
00:12:01,740 --> 00:12:04,040
and everything will be
back to normal.
229
00:12:04,040 --> 00:12:05,650
You're not gonna tell anyone,
are you?
230
00:12:05,650 --> 00:12:10,650
I wouldn't want
to taste the words.
231
00:12:10,650 --> 00:12:12,920
Thanks, buddy.
232
00:12:12,920 --> 00:12:15,020
Get out of here.
233
00:12:25,320 --> 00:12:28,820
Ah, yes, very nice.
Yes...
234
00:12:28,820 --> 00:12:31,010
All right.
235
00:12:31,010 --> 00:12:33,530
I'm really liking
what I'm seeing.
236
00:12:33,530 --> 00:12:35,130
Ah, thanks, Rudolfo.
237
00:12:35,130 --> 00:12:37,330
Now, let's get a little sexier.
238
00:12:37,330 --> 00:12:39,500
Why don't you both
remove your tops.
239
00:12:41,570 --> 00:12:43,170
Can do, Rudy.
240
00:12:44,540 --> 00:12:47,510
I-I'm not sure
I'm ready yet.
241
00:12:47,510 --> 00:12:49,810
Oh, Jen, you saw my portfolio.
242
00:12:49,810 --> 00:12:51,630
It'll be very tasteful.
243
00:12:51,630 --> 00:12:54,580
We'll strategically cover
any parts that may--
244
00:12:54,580 --> 00:12:56,450
- Rudy, Rudy, if I may...
245
00:12:56,450 --> 00:12:58,620
I'll tell you what, honey,
I'll go first on my own.
246
00:12:58,620 --> 00:13:01,590
You'll see how easy
it is, okay?
247
00:13:03,360 --> 00:13:05,930
Rudolfo.
All right. Yes.
248
00:13:05,930 --> 00:13:08,830
There you go.
Okay, yes.
249
00:13:08,830 --> 00:13:12,130
Oh, now...
You're having fun.
250
00:13:12,130 --> 00:13:13,600
You're having fun.
Yes.
251
00:13:13,600 --> 00:13:14,800
Uh, like...
252
00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:19,170
Yes...
253
00:13:19,180 --> 00:13:21,610
Now--now you're
a little shy.
254
00:13:21,610 --> 00:13:23,610
A little shy.
Oh, wait...
255
00:13:23,610 --> 00:13:25,680
Oh, no...
Oh, so shy.
256
00:13:25,680 --> 00:13:29,050
Oh, now--now you've got
a secret...A secret.
257
00:13:29,050 --> 00:13:31,790
What is it?
258
00:13:33,620 --> 00:13:36,490
No, uh, I wanted
a different pose.
259
00:13:36,490 --> 00:13:40,130
Wouldn't that be
your secret?
260
00:13:41,860 --> 00:13:43,300
- No, I meant--
- No, because it's yours.
261
00:13:43,300 --> 00:13:45,030
Okay, you know what,
just to end this,
262
00:13:45,030 --> 00:13:47,270
I'm ready now.
263
00:13:54,110 --> 00:13:56,030
It's Liz!
264
00:14:00,480 --> 00:14:02,980
Hey, Liz.
Hey, Jeff, it's li...
265
00:14:06,220 --> 00:14:09,320
Well, I just wanted
to let you know
266
00:14:09,330 --> 00:14:11,490
I took your advice.
267
00:14:11,490 --> 00:14:13,660
Oh, great.
268
00:14:13,660 --> 00:14:15,500
So which gym did you join?
269
00:14:18,370 --> 00:14:20,100
Not that advice, silly.
270
00:14:20,100 --> 00:14:23,100
I met a guy, and I just
had fun in the moment.
271
00:14:23,110 --> 00:14:25,390
Oh, good for you!
272
00:14:25,390 --> 00:14:27,610
Half hour after
we started talking,
273
00:14:27,610 --> 00:14:29,410
we were playin'
the old slap 'n' tickle.
274
00:14:32,480 --> 00:14:35,480
And I didn't think of him
as husband material
275
00:14:35,480 --> 00:14:39,620
because, believe me,
he was not.
276
00:14:39,620 --> 00:14:43,120
Yeah. I mean, obviously...
277
00:14:43,130 --> 00:14:46,090
You're not gonna marry a guy
you slept with that fast.
278
00:14:48,700 --> 00:14:51,600
How long before you and Jeff
started making love?
279
00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:55,500
Uh...Oh...I don't think
we slept together
280
00:14:55,500 --> 00:14:56,800
till we'd been dating
for a month.
281
00:14:59,340 --> 00:15:01,980
So who was this guy?
282
00:15:01,980 --> 00:15:05,680
I'd really rather not say.
283
00:15:05,680 --> 00:15:07,550
He was kind of a bowser.
284
00:15:09,950 --> 00:15:12,950
Oh, well, who's proud
to sleep with any man, really?
285
00:15:16,460 --> 00:15:17,560
So how'd you leave it?
286
00:15:17,560 --> 00:15:19,690
I pretended to sleep
287
00:15:19,700 --> 00:15:21,160
while he let himself out.
288
00:15:21,160 --> 00:15:23,100
I think he got the message.
289
00:15:23,100 --> 00:15:24,900
Let's just hope
kitty doesn't come back
290
00:15:24,900 --> 00:15:29,040
begging for some more milk.
291
00:15:35,180 --> 00:15:37,850
She's embarrassed?
292
00:15:37,850 --> 00:15:39,480
No, no, no...
293
00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:42,580
I'm embarrassed!
294
00:15:43,950 --> 00:15:46,650
She said she was.
295
00:15:46,660 --> 00:15:49,560
Called you a bowser.
296
00:15:49,560 --> 00:15:52,140
This can't be happening.
297
00:15:52,140 --> 00:15:54,630
If she's happy
to get rid of me,
298
00:15:54,630 --> 00:15:57,700
I have officially hit
rock bottom.
299
00:15:57,700 --> 00:15:59,130
Are you sure
that wasn't the time
300
00:15:59,130 --> 00:16:00,700
you called me at 2:00 a.M.
To ask
301
00:16:00,700 --> 00:16:05,010
if girls also had
Adam's apples?
302
00:16:05,010 --> 00:16:07,410
Oh, I'm positive.
This is way worse.
303
00:16:07,410 --> 00:16:08,440
It can't end this way.
304
00:16:08,440 --> 00:16:11,480
I'm supposed to get her
to want me,
305
00:16:11,480 --> 00:16:13,680
then I dump her.
306
00:16:13,680 --> 00:16:16,150
Just the way it goes, man.
307
00:16:16,150 --> 00:16:18,640
Sorry, it's already over, bowz.
308
00:16:18,640 --> 00:16:21,390
Then I'll have to restart it.
309
00:16:21,390 --> 00:16:22,520
Restart what?
310
00:16:22,520 --> 00:16:25,660
If I know Mr. dunbar...
311
00:16:25,660 --> 00:16:28,930
And I wish I didn't...
312
00:16:28,930 --> 00:16:30,930
He's going to try
to sleep with Liz again
313
00:16:30,930 --> 00:16:32,770
so he can be the one to end it.
314
00:16:34,140 --> 00:16:37,140
Exact-a-mundo.
315
00:16:39,010 --> 00:16:42,040
And I'm gonna bring
the best game I've ever brought.
316
00:16:42,040 --> 00:16:45,580
And when she's begging
for more,
317
00:16:45,580 --> 00:16:48,620
I'll tell her the circus
just pulled out of loserville,
318
00:16:48,620 --> 00:16:51,490
and we're on our way
to skank town, U.S.A.
319
00:17:00,460 --> 00:17:03,700
Oh...Russell.
320
00:17:03,700 --> 00:17:05,730
Oh, yeah, it's me.
321
00:17:05,730 --> 00:17:09,870
And it's time for round two.
322
00:17:09,870 --> 00:17:11,440
Well, I was just about
323
00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:14,140
to change
the cat box liner and...
324
00:17:16,010 --> 00:17:18,180
Oh, what the h-e-
double hockey sticks,
325
00:17:18,180 --> 00:17:20,060
let's do this.
326
00:17:41,720 --> 00:17:43,170
Jeff, wake up.
What?
327
00:17:43,170 --> 00:17:44,710
You were asleep.
328
00:17:44,710 --> 00:17:48,640
No, I'm gonna make a smoothie,
then I'm gonna go jog.
329
00:17:48,640 --> 00:17:51,910
Gotta look like this.
330
00:17:51,910 --> 00:17:54,050
That's a cactus, Jeff.
331
00:17:54,050 --> 00:17:57,100
Jeez, trying to look
like your old picture
332
00:17:57,100 --> 00:17:58,420
is killing you.
333
00:17:58,420 --> 00:17:59,690
You don't have to do this.
334
00:17:59,690 --> 00:18:02,020
If I don't, then I'm just
an old fat guy.
335
00:18:02,020 --> 00:18:04,160
Oh, shut up!
336
00:18:04,160 --> 00:18:05,990
You are in better shape
than most guys your age,
337
00:18:05,990 --> 00:18:07,530
and a lot of guys
younger than you too.
338
00:18:07,530 --> 00:18:09,700
True. But wouldn't you
rather have that guy?
339
00:18:09,700 --> 00:18:11,900
No. I had that guy.
340
00:18:11,900 --> 00:18:14,240
His dorm room was full
of neon beer signs
341
00:18:14,240 --> 00:18:16,800
and a Kelly lebrock poster.
342
00:18:18,140 --> 00:18:21,740
Before seagal
got a hold of her.
343
00:18:21,740 --> 00:18:23,750
I mean, come on, look.
Wouldn't you rather have
344
00:18:23,750 --> 00:18:27,420
that guy with the six-pack
than this guy with the keg?
345
00:18:27,420 --> 00:18:31,050
Oh, honey,
is that what this is about?
346
00:18:31,050 --> 00:18:32,770
I was just teasing you.
347
00:18:32,770 --> 00:18:36,090
And I think you are
way hotter now
348
00:18:36,090 --> 00:18:37,360
than you were back then.
349
00:18:37,360 --> 00:18:39,830
How do you figure?
350
00:18:43,130 --> 00:18:45,100
Well, I wasn't really prepared
351
00:18:45,100 --> 00:18:47,770
for a follow-up question.
352
00:18:47,770 --> 00:18:50,940
Let's just go to bed
and we'll sleep on it, okay?
353
00:18:57,550 --> 00:19:01,620
Hey, lover.
354
00:19:01,620 --> 00:19:03,890
Last night was incredible.
355
00:19:03,890 --> 00:19:06,690
Thanks, babe.
356
00:19:06,690 --> 00:19:10,460
But, uh...
Here's the thing.
357
00:19:10,460 --> 00:19:12,160
Before you go on, listen.
358
00:19:12,160 --> 00:19:14,300
No, no, no, wait.
You listen, okay?
359
00:19:14,300 --> 00:19:16,860
See...
Wait. Listen...
360
00:19:16,870 --> 00:19:19,200
If anyone's listening,
it's gonna be you, okay?
361
00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:20,330
So listen.
362
00:19:20,340 --> 00:19:21,500
- Listen.
- Listen.
363
00:19:21,500 --> 00:19:23,340
- Listen...Listen...
- Listen...Listen...
364
00:19:23,340 --> 00:19:24,640
- Listen!
- Listen!
365
00:19:24,640 --> 00:19:25,640
- Listen.
- Listen!
366
00:19:25,640 --> 00:19:27,780
- Listen!
- Urrgggh!
367
00:19:33,850 --> 00:19:37,420
All right, let's try this again,
real quick.
368
00:19:42,910 --> 00:19:46,440
So this is the picture
we decided to blow up...
369
00:19:46,440 --> 00:19:48,110
And frame.
370
00:19:48,110 --> 00:19:49,610
Okay, ready?
371
00:19:54,320 --> 00:19:55,620
Wow.
372
00:19:55,620 --> 00:19:56,920
What--what do you think?
373
00:19:56,920 --> 00:19:58,420
Jen looks hot.
374
00:19:58,420 --> 00:20:01,460
Thanks.
375
00:20:01,460 --> 00:20:03,340
What about me?
376
00:20:03,340 --> 00:20:05,830
I'm not looking at you.
377
00:20:05,830 --> 00:20:08,630
Can you?
378
00:20:08,630 --> 00:20:11,130
Can.
379
00:20:11,140 --> 00:20:13,370
Not gonna.
380
00:20:13,370 --> 00:20:14,940
What do you care
what he thinks?
381
00:20:14,940 --> 00:20:16,940
I just do.
382
00:20:16,940 --> 00:20:18,710
I want him to like it.
383
00:20:18,710 --> 00:20:22,780
Well, I think you look
really sexy.
384
00:20:22,780 --> 00:20:24,650
Thanks.
385
00:20:24,650 --> 00:20:26,880
Anyway, no matter how bad
we look when we get old,
386
00:20:26,890 --> 00:20:28,550
we will always have this.
Mm-hmm.
387
00:20:28,550 --> 00:20:31,260
You'll also have this.
388
00:20:32,460 --> 00:20:35,830
Is that me?
389
00:20:35,830 --> 00:20:37,260
Yes...
390
00:20:37,260 --> 00:20:40,760
In an ad for
a gay escort service.
391
00:20:43,400 --> 00:20:46,170
Oh, my God!
The photographer must have
392
00:20:46,170 --> 00:20:49,770
sold the picture to them,
and then they photoshopped it.
393
00:20:49,770 --> 00:20:54,110
Well, at least they chose
a good shot.
394
00:20:54,110 --> 00:20:57,150
This is the one
where I have a secret.
395
00:21:00,650 --> 00:21:03,150
I think the secret's out,
buddy.
396
00:21:03,150 --> 00:21:06,190
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