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1
00:00:04,704 --> 00:00:07,054
Once again, to vote
for Lacey and Justin,
2
00:00:07,055 --> 00:00:13,111
call or text 1-800-555-0199.
3
00:00:13,112 --> 00:00:15,213
We'll be right back
with more of
4
00:00:15,214 --> 00:00:17,982
Dance America, Dance
after this.
5
00:00:17,983 --> 00:00:20,635
Oh, damn, it's busy.
Keep trying, keep trying.
6
00:00:20,636 --> 00:00:22,070
Lacey needs our votes.
7
00:00:22,071 --> 00:00:23,254
This is so fun.
8
00:00:23,255 --> 00:00:24,856
I can't watch TV with Adam,
9
00:00:24,857 --> 00:00:26,991
he never stops talking.
It's so annoying.
10
00:00:26,992 --> 00:00:28,142
Oh, God, yes, jus...
11
00:00:28,143 --> 00:00:30,796
Shh, it's back on.
12
00:00:30,797 --> 00:00:32,480
Audrey, what's with the phones?
13
00:00:32,481 --> 00:00:34,966
Been calling and everything
goes to voicemail.
14
00:00:34,967 --> 00:00:37,652
Our dance show's on,
we were calling in our votes.
15
00:00:37,653 --> 00:00:39,487
So you gotta
tie up all the lines?
16
00:00:39,488 --> 00:00:40,655
Shh!
17
00:00:40,656 --> 00:00:43,391
Hey, did I just get
shushed in my own home?
18
00:00:43,392 --> 00:00:46,260
Why don't you sit down and
watch with us? You'd like it.
19
00:00:46,261 --> 00:00:48,313
I don't know.
Not really my kind of dancing.
20
00:00:48,314 --> 00:00:51,249
What is your kind of dancing?
In an end zone.
21
00:00:51,250 --> 00:00:52,818
On a pole.
22
00:00:52,819 --> 00:00:55,303
In a lap.
23
00:00:55,304 --> 00:00:57,305
Ooh, they're lining
up the finalists.
24
00:00:57,306 --> 00:00:58,673
Hopefully to shoot them.
25
00:00:58,674 --> 00:01:00,458
Look, there's Lacey.
26
00:01:00,459 --> 00:01:04,245
She's our favorite.
Isn't she great?
27
00:01:04,246 --> 00:01:07,315
All right, so you know that
TV show Dance America, Dance?
28
00:01:07,316 --> 00:01:10,401
What, are you... ? Are you
kidding me? I love that show.
29
00:01:10,402 --> 00:01:11,686
You are so gay.
30
00:01:13,355 --> 00:01:15,106
Anyways, I was watching
it last night...
31
00:01:15,107 --> 00:01:17,442
Why am I gay
for watching it and you're not?
32
00:01:17,443 --> 00:01:19,294
Who's telling this story?
33
00:01:19,295 --> 00:01:21,646
Oh, I'm sorry, Jeff.
34
00:01:21,647 --> 00:01:25,466
Anyways, there's this really hot
contestant, Lacey...
35
00:01:25,467 --> 00:01:26,718
Oh, I know Lacey.
36
00:01:26,719 --> 00:01:29,488
Her tango was magical.
37
00:01:29,489 --> 00:01:33,674
That's why you're gay
38
00:01:33,675 --> 00:01:36,444
and I'm not.
39
00:01:36,445 --> 00:01:39,080
Well, right before
I met Audrey, I dated her.
40
00:01:39,081 --> 00:01:40,315
Really? You dated her?
41
00:01:40,316 --> 00:01:41,499
Oh, yeah. I...
42
00:01:41,500 --> 00:01:45,253
I dated the crap out of her.
43
00:01:45,254 --> 00:01:47,506
You know what I mean?
44
00:01:47,507 --> 00:01:52,093
Yeah. Yeah, I mean, you took her
out on a lot of dates.
45
00:01:52,094 --> 00:01:54,329
Sometimes I wish I'd made
more of an effort
46
00:01:54,330 --> 00:01:56,031
to cultivate friends.
47
00:01:57,767 --> 00:01:58,883
I had sex with her.
48
00:01:58,884 --> 00:02:00,668
With Lacey?
That's unbelievable.
49
00:02:00,669 --> 00:02:02,170
Did you... Did you tell Audrey?
50
00:02:02,171 --> 00:02:05,239
Right after I showed her how
to check my Internet history.
51
00:02:06,508 --> 00:02:08,943
Wow.
52
00:02:08,944 --> 00:02:10,078
You look terrible.
53
00:02:10,079 --> 00:02:12,680
Yeah, what's up
Leaving Las Vegas?
54
00:02:12,681 --> 00:02:14,048
Not in the mood.
55
00:02:14,049 --> 00:02:15,917
Hey, Russell.
56
00:02:15,918 --> 00:02:17,184
You know what you want?
57
00:02:17,185 --> 00:02:19,186
A beautiful young
woman named Suneetha
58
00:02:19,187 --> 00:02:20,722
who's engaged to my assistant.
59
00:02:20,723 --> 00:02:22,724
I take four buses to get here.
60
00:02:22,725 --> 00:02:24,892
Can you just order?
61
00:02:24,893 --> 00:02:27,028
Uh, just water.
62
00:02:27,029 --> 00:02:29,330
Water.
Can't wait for that tip.
63
00:02:31,133 --> 00:02:33,601
It's pathetic. I'm still
hung up on Suneetha.
64
00:02:33,602 --> 00:02:36,004
I just have to do
the mature thing, I think.
65
00:02:36,005 --> 00:02:37,038
What's that?
66
00:02:37,039 --> 00:02:38,239
I'm gonna fire his ass.
67
00:02:38,240 --> 00:02:40,191
Then I'll never have
to see her again.
68
00:02:40,192 --> 00:02:42,978
I mean, you can't just fire him
for marrying Suneetha.
69
00:02:42,979 --> 00:02:47,282
He'll sue you and take the tiny
shirt off your little back.
70
00:02:47,283 --> 00:02:48,767
Yeah, that's true.
71
00:02:48,768 --> 00:02:51,953
I'm not big.
72
00:02:51,954 --> 00:02:54,789
So I'm right back where
I started. They'll get married,
73
00:02:54,790 --> 00:02:57,191
she'll be hanging around.
What am I gonna do?
74
00:02:57,192 --> 00:02:58,276
I know this is difficult,
75
00:02:58,277 --> 00:03:00,144
but I have something
that might help.
76
00:03:00,145 --> 00:03:01,546
All right.
77
00:03:01,547 --> 00:03:05,399
You ever see that show
Dance America, Dance?
78
00:03:07,469 --> 00:03:10,622
♪ How many ways
To say, "I love you?" ♪
79
00:03:13,058 --> 00:03:17,729
♪ How many ways
To say that I'm not scared? ♪
80
00:03:17,730 --> 00:03:20,298
♪ With you by my side ♪
81
00:03:20,299 --> 00:03:22,617
♪ There is no denyin' ♪
82
00:03:22,618 --> 00:03:25,837
♪ I can't wait
For me and you ♪
83
00:03:32,745 --> 00:03:34,413
Just give it some time.
84
00:03:34,414 --> 00:03:36,448
I mean, Timmy works here,
not Suneetha.
85
00:03:36,449 --> 00:03:38,917
Not like she's gonna
be hanging out in the office.
86
00:03:38,918 --> 00:03:40,669
Yeah.
87
00:03:42,505 --> 00:03:45,807
She's hanging out
in the office.
88
00:03:45,808 --> 00:03:46,625
Hello.
89
00:03:46,626 --> 00:03:48,827
Hello, sir. Mr. Rhodes.
90
00:03:48,828 --> 00:03:51,230
Suneetha just brought
over my wedding clothes
91
00:03:51,231 --> 00:03:52,498
for me to try on.
92
00:03:52,499 --> 00:03:55,033
It's sort of Bollywood
meets Shiva,
93
00:03:55,034 --> 00:03:56,768
Hindu god of destruction.
94
00:03:56,769 --> 00:04:00,238
It'll look great once
he grows four more arms.
95
00:04:00,239 --> 00:04:01,690
Suneetha.
96
00:04:01,691 --> 00:04:04,943
Oh, Russell knows
I'm joking, don't you?
97
00:04:04,944 --> 00:04:06,295
Oh, yeah.
98
00:04:06,296 --> 00:04:08,664
Ha, ha, ha, ha!
Good one.
99
00:04:11,768 --> 00:04:14,136
Bye-bye, darling.
Goodbye.
100
00:04:14,137 --> 00:04:16,639
Mr. Rhodes.
101
00:04:16,640 --> 00:04:17,840
Russell.
102
00:04:19,643 --> 00:04:21,010
See, that wasn't so bad...
103
00:04:21,011 --> 00:04:22,545
Shut up. Timmy hit the bricks,
104
00:04:22,546 --> 00:04:23,946
pack your stuff, you're fi...
105
00:04:23,947 --> 00:04:25,297
I don't wanna get married.
106
00:04:25,298 --> 00:04:27,383
What?
I don't wanna get married.
107
00:04:27,384 --> 00:04:29,702
It's not Suneetha,
she's lovely. A lovely girl,
108
00:04:29,703 --> 00:04:32,621
but we just met, and I can't
marry someone I don't know.
109
00:04:32,622 --> 00:04:33,822
Okay. Okay. It's okay.
110
00:04:33,823 --> 00:04:36,659
These are pre-wedding jitters,
everybody gets them.
111
00:04:36,660 --> 00:04:38,310
You'll be happy
once you're married.
112
00:04:38,311 --> 00:04:40,129
What are you doing?
113
00:04:40,130 --> 00:04:42,698
I should never have consented
to an arranged marriage,
114
00:04:42,699 --> 00:04:44,316
and now I...
I feel it's too late
115
00:04:44,317 --> 00:04:46,985
for me to back out,
but I'm too young,
116
00:04:46,986 --> 00:04:49,504
I've hardly even dated anyone.
You know?
117
00:04:49,505 --> 00:04:50,806
What should I do?
118
00:04:50,807 --> 00:04:53,142
Okay, look, I-I don't know
if this will help,
119
00:04:53,143 --> 00:04:54,960
but have you seen that show,
120
00:04:54,961 --> 00:04:57,263
Dance America, Dance?
121
00:04:58,714 --> 00:05:00,382
Timmy, we can't do this for you.
122
00:05:00,383 --> 00:05:02,484
This is a decision
you have to make.
123
00:05:02,485 --> 00:05:04,704
I could break it off,
but the repercussions.
124
00:05:04,705 --> 00:05:08,974
Well, better a broken engagement
than a broken marriage.
125
00:05:08,975 --> 00:05:10,893
That's what I've been thinking.
126
00:05:10,894 --> 00:05:13,812
Okay.
But I've just been so afraid...
127
00:05:13,813 --> 00:05:16,515
Too afraid to say it out loud.
128
00:05:16,516 --> 00:05:19,484
Thank you for your counsel, sir.
129
00:05:19,485 --> 00:05:20,986
Listen,
I'm not gonna stand here
130
00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:23,689
and watch my best friend make
a life-altering mistake.
131
00:05:25,642 --> 00:05:27,893
He's your best friend?
132
00:05:27,894 --> 00:05:30,746
I really do feel as though
a great weight has been lifted.
133
00:05:30,747 --> 00:05:32,214
Okay.
134
00:05:32,215 --> 00:05:35,150
I guess I'll just go update my
Facebook page.
135
00:05:38,421 --> 00:05:40,956
Fantastic performance, Lacey.
136
00:05:40,957 --> 00:05:43,325
Huh, who knew you could get
your legs that high.
137
00:05:47,814 --> 00:05:49,448
This is so cute.
138
00:05:49,449 --> 00:05:52,101
You are totally into it.
139
00:05:52,102 --> 00:05:54,753
You have no idea.
140
00:05:54,754 --> 00:05:56,304
Please move.
141
00:05:56,305 --> 00:05:58,757
Oh, that's Lacey. Isn't she the
best?
142
00:05:58,758 --> 00:06:01,043
Top three.
143
00:06:01,044 --> 00:06:02,861
Did you love what she did?
144
00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:05,597
No complaints.
145
00:06:05,598 --> 00:06:08,667
I am so glad we finally found
something we can enjoy together.
146
00:06:08,668 --> 00:06:12,487
You, me, Lacey,
147
00:06:12,488 --> 00:06:15,874
together, that's fantastic.
148
00:06:18,094 --> 00:06:19,545
So it should take me,
like, what,
149
00:06:19,546 --> 00:06:21,613
20 minutes to get to
the dentist tomorrow?
150
00:06:21,614 --> 00:06:22,814
Shh.
Yeah.
151
00:06:22,815 --> 00:06:25,968
No, yeah, I should
probably leave around 9:30.
152
00:06:25,969 --> 00:06:28,637
Hey, can you take
my blue shirt to the cleaners?
153
00:06:28,638 --> 00:06:30,439
I spilled my snow cone on it.
154
00:06:30,440 --> 00:06:33,224
I'm so lame.
155
00:06:33,225 --> 00:06:35,093
Honey, what is this
on the back of my neck?
156
00:06:35,094 --> 00:06:36,328
Is this a skin tag or...
157
00:06:36,329 --> 00:06:39,498
Oh, my God, I'm trying
to watch this.
158
00:06:39,499 --> 00:06:40,749
Sorry.
159
00:06:40,750 --> 00:06:42,985
This is exactly why
I can't watch TV with you,
160
00:06:42,986 --> 00:06:45,604
because you won't stop running
your word hole.
161
00:06:45,605 --> 00:06:48,623
Okay, I said I was sorry.
162
00:06:48,624 --> 00:06:50,860
Mean.
163
00:06:50,861 --> 00:06:52,361
This is all Audrey's fault.
164
00:06:52,362 --> 00:06:54,196
If she didn't get
Jeff into the show,
165
00:06:54,197 --> 00:06:56,265
his fat ass wouldn't be parked
in my chair
166
00:06:56,266 --> 00:06:59,534
and I wouldn't be stuck here
with Chitty Chatty Blah Blah.
167
00:07:00,821 --> 00:07:02,921
So mean.
168
00:07:02,922 --> 00:07:04,473
And for your information,
169
00:07:04,474 --> 00:07:07,042
Jeff's not watching it
'cause he's into the show.
170
00:07:07,043 --> 00:07:09,644
What?
Never mind.
171
00:07:09,645 --> 00:07:13,065
No, if he doesn't like it,
then why would he watch?
172
00:07:13,066 --> 00:07:15,634
Oh, look who suddenly wants
me to run my word hole.
173
00:07:16,970 --> 00:07:19,938
All right, I'm sorry I was mean.
174
00:07:19,939 --> 00:07:22,424
Okay,
but you can't tell anyone.
175
00:07:22,425 --> 00:07:23,491
So before Jeff...
176
00:07:28,564 --> 00:07:29,731
Hey, Audrey.
177
00:07:29,732 --> 00:07:30,782
Hey.
Hey.
178
00:07:30,783 --> 00:07:32,518
Oh, hey, Jen,
I meant to call you.
179
00:07:32,519 --> 00:07:34,653
Did you watch the results
show last night?
180
00:07:34,654 --> 00:07:35,954
Yeah, but it wasn't easy,
181
00:07:35,955 --> 00:07:40,358
thanks to Captain Gum Flap
and his war on silence.
182
00:07:40,359 --> 00:07:42,828
That's the meanest.
183
00:07:42,829 --> 00:07:45,547
I am so psyched
Lacey made it through.
184
00:07:45,548 --> 00:07:47,616
So was Jeff,
he's totally behind her.
185
00:07:49,719 --> 00:07:51,320
I'm not sure she can win,
186
00:07:51,321 --> 00:07:53,088
but Jeff thinks
she's got it in her.
187
00:07:56,976 --> 00:07:59,511
All right, what's going on?
188
00:07:59,512 --> 00:08:00,813
What do you mean?
189
00:08:00,814 --> 00:08:04,149
First the nudge, then the second
nudge, then the look.
190
00:08:04,150 --> 00:08:06,902
I don't know what you're...
I've been married 14 years,
191
00:08:06,903 --> 00:08:09,888
I know nudges and looks
when I see 'em.
192
00:08:09,889 --> 00:08:11,039
Adam?
193
00:08:11,040 --> 00:08:14,609
Well, I... I-I...
194
00:08:16,045 --> 00:08:18,546
Well, don't give me the look
again, she's onto it.
195
00:08:25,155 --> 00:08:26,255
Oh.
196
00:08:26,256 --> 00:08:28,723
Well, look who's
all fresh and peppy.
197
00:08:31,728 --> 00:08:34,462
Is that baby powder?
198
00:08:35,632 --> 00:08:37,766
I have a skin condition.
199
00:08:37,767 --> 00:08:40,568
What, diaper rash?
200
00:08:40,569 --> 00:08:42,671
Ah, pretty and funny.
201
00:08:42,672 --> 00:08:45,557
I can't believe you haven't
snared a husband by now.
202
00:08:45,558 --> 00:08:47,876
So now that Timmy's
let go of Suneetha,
203
00:08:47,877 --> 00:08:50,228
you haven't you pounced
on her yet?
204
00:08:50,229 --> 00:08:53,131
Um, show some respect. He just
broke up with her last night,
205
00:08:53,132 --> 00:08:54,733
I haven't talked
to the guy yet.
206
00:08:54,734 --> 00:08:57,469
So wait a minute. You're acting
like a decent guy here?
207
00:08:57,470 --> 00:08:59,821
Yeah, I am. And here's how
it's gonna go down:
208
00:08:59,822 --> 00:09:02,541
Timmy comes in,
and it's hug, hug, hug,
209
00:09:02,542 --> 00:09:04,676
"how'd it go?," sad, sad, sad,
210
00:09:04,677 --> 00:09:06,145
then I wait till around lunch,
211
00:09:06,146 --> 00:09:08,147
and then: pounce, pounce,
pounce.
212
00:09:11,834 --> 00:09:13,368
Hey, Timmy.
213
00:09:14,354 --> 00:09:15,904
Morning, sir.
214
00:09:15,905 --> 00:09:18,073
Aw, come here.
215
00:09:19,409 --> 00:09:22,627
How'd it go?
216
00:09:22,628 --> 00:09:24,813
I didn't tell her.
217
00:09:24,814 --> 00:09:26,582
What? Why not,
you little freak?
218
00:09:26,583 --> 00:09:28,950
I beg your pardon, sir?
219
00:09:28,951 --> 00:09:31,686
I mean, what happened,
little buddy? Talk to me.
220
00:09:31,687 --> 00:09:33,104
I just froze.
221
00:09:33,105 --> 00:09:35,473
I mean, I don't want
to get married,
222
00:09:35,474 --> 00:09:37,692
but I've never broken
up with anyone before.
223
00:09:37,693 --> 00:09:39,812
I'm not sure I can do this.
Y-You can.
224
00:09:39,813 --> 00:09:41,246
It's easy, you do it fast,
225
00:09:41,247 --> 00:09:43,165
like ripping off a Band-Aid.
226
00:09:43,166 --> 00:09:45,017
It's really not that easy.
227
00:09:45,018 --> 00:09:47,302
It is easy.
Let's... Let's act it out.
228
00:09:47,303 --> 00:09:49,121
I'll be Suneetha,
you break up with me.
229
00:09:49,122 --> 00:09:52,324
Sir, I don't think...
Just pretend. Pretend. Come on.
230
00:09:54,260 --> 00:09:56,061
All right.
231
00:10:00,766 --> 00:10:02,834
Suneetha.
232
00:10:02,835 --> 00:10:04,836
Gosh, you smell
like baby powder.
233
00:10:07,974 --> 00:10:12,460
I, um, just wanted to say...
234
00:10:12,461 --> 00:10:15,213
If... A conversation that I was
hoping to have... I mean...
235
00:10:15,214 --> 00:10:17,900
Yes, let's say she has to be
somewhere this century.
236
00:10:17,901 --> 00:10:19,201
All right, go.
237
00:10:19,202 --> 00:10:21,069
I told you,
I'm really no good at this.
238
00:10:21,070 --> 00:10:22,905
All right, forget it. You know
what?
239
00:10:22,906 --> 00:10:26,441
I'll be you
and you be Suneetha, okay?
240
00:10:26,442 --> 00:10:29,511
Fine.
Okay, here we go.
241
00:10:29,512 --> 00:10:31,346
Suneetha...
Hold on.
242
00:10:31,347 --> 00:10:32,981
Ugh, what?
243
00:10:32,982 --> 00:10:35,801
Timmy, is she from northern
or southern India?
244
00:10:35,802 --> 00:10:37,686
She's from Mumbai.
245
00:10:37,687 --> 00:10:38,670
Hm.
246
00:10:38,671 --> 00:10:42,023
Okay, good.
247
00:10:42,024 --> 00:10:45,844
Is that good? You got it figured
out now? Is everything okay?
248
00:10:45,845 --> 00:10:49,347
Hm. Yes, go.
249
00:10:49,348 --> 00:10:50,598
All right.
250
00:10:50,599 --> 00:10:53,301
Suneetha, I've been searching...
251
00:10:56,355 --> 00:10:58,156
What are you doing?
Oh.
252
00:10:58,157 --> 00:11:00,742
She's crying. Oh, dear.
She knows what's coming.
253
00:11:00,743 --> 00:11:02,377
She doesn't know what's coming.
254
00:11:02,378 --> 00:11:04,045
You don't know what's coming.
255
00:11:04,046 --> 00:11:06,181
How do I not know?
It's all over your face.
256
00:11:06,182 --> 00:11:09,050
You just sit there
and get dumped. Don't be crazy.
257
00:11:09,051 --> 00:11:10,152
Fine, I won't even react.
258
00:11:10,153 --> 00:11:13,738
Even though my whole world
is crashing down.
259
00:11:13,739 --> 00:11:15,857
Suneetha, I'm so sorry,
I didn't mean it.
260
00:11:15,858 --> 00:11:17,125
We'll make it work.
261
00:11:17,126 --> 00:11:17,943
Oh, Timmy.
262
00:11:17,944 --> 00:11:19,844
No, no, no.
263
00:11:19,845 --> 00:11:21,780
Timmy, stand there.
264
00:11:23,182 --> 00:11:24,716
Sit down. Please.
265
00:11:24,717 --> 00:11:26,251
It's not that complicated.
266
00:11:26,252 --> 00:11:28,253
All right.
267
00:11:28,254 --> 00:11:29,421
Suneetha,
268
00:11:29,422 --> 00:11:32,440
you are an extraordinary girl,
269
00:11:32,441 --> 00:11:33,876
but I can't marry you.
270
00:11:33,877 --> 00:11:37,829
I've searched my heart,
and it's... It's not meant to be.
271
00:11:37,830 --> 00:11:39,882
I wish you no pain.
272
00:11:39,883 --> 00:11:43,651
I wish you love and happiness.
273
00:11:43,652 --> 00:11:45,336
Goodbye, sweet Suneetha.
274
00:11:50,226 --> 00:11:53,245
Oh, sir, you've outdone
yourself. That was beautiful.
275
00:11:53,246 --> 00:11:54,262
Yes.
276
00:11:54,263 --> 00:11:57,466
Now, go tell her
and you call me after, okay?
277
00:11:57,467 --> 00:11:59,067
You call me right after.
278
00:11:59,068 --> 00:12:00,919
You call me immediately after.
279
00:12:00,920 --> 00:12:02,454
I will do.
And thank you, sir.
280
00:12:02,455 --> 00:12:04,823
Yeah, yeah, that's great.
281
00:12:04,824 --> 00:12:06,324
Was that so hard?
282
00:12:06,325 --> 00:12:09,627
No, because I've been cheating
on you for a month.
283
00:12:22,091 --> 00:12:23,391
Hey, hey. What's shakin'?
284
00:12:23,392 --> 00:12:24,592
Hm, not much.
285
00:12:24,593 --> 00:12:26,294
Tough break for dance fans.
286
00:12:26,295 --> 00:12:28,280
What do you mean?
It was just on the news.
287
00:12:28,281 --> 00:12:30,632
Lacey got kicked off the show.
What? Why?
288
00:12:30,633 --> 00:12:33,535
Apparently, she was bangin'
all the producers.
289
00:12:33,536 --> 00:12:35,887
Wow.
290
00:12:35,888 --> 00:12:40,125
Yep, according to the news
she's a giant slut.
291
00:12:40,126 --> 00:12:45,163
Really? That's what they're
reporting on the news.
292
00:12:46,732 --> 00:12:48,000
Adam blabbed, huh?
293
00:12:48,001 --> 00:12:50,068
You just let me sit there,
294
00:12:50,069 --> 00:12:51,670
rooting for her like an idiot,
295
00:12:51,671 --> 00:12:53,455
while you were only
watching the show
296
00:12:53,456 --> 00:12:56,574
because you slept with her?
That sounds like a question,
297
00:12:56,575 --> 00:13:01,446
but I feel that
you already know the answer.
298
00:13:01,447 --> 00:13:02,881
Why didn't you just tell me?
299
00:13:02,882 --> 00:13:05,833
Oh, how would that have gone?
"Hey, you see Lacey? I did her.
300
00:13:05,834 --> 00:13:07,452
Up high."
301
00:13:10,005 --> 00:13:11,823
Come on, you love that show,
302
00:13:11,824 --> 00:13:13,408
I didn't wanna
spoil it for you.
303
00:13:13,409 --> 00:13:15,777
And possibly
cost Lacey your vote.
304
00:13:15,778 --> 00:13:18,013
Oh, you think I'm that petty?
305
00:13:18,014 --> 00:13:20,114
You know I do.
306
00:13:20,115 --> 00:13:21,216
I mean, if she wins this,
307
00:13:21,217 --> 00:13:23,969
it could be the best thing
that ever happened to her.
308
00:13:23,970 --> 00:13:25,537
Second best.
309
00:13:28,040 --> 00:13:29,324
See?
310
00:13:29,325 --> 00:13:31,442
You're not enjoying this.
311
00:13:31,443 --> 00:13:32,361
Oh, shut up.
312
00:13:32,362 --> 00:13:34,529
It wouldn't have bothered
me at all.
313
00:13:34,530 --> 00:13:35,830
Oh, come on.
314
00:13:35,831 --> 00:13:37,832
Jeff, we have
been married 14 years,
315
00:13:37,833 --> 00:13:38,966
we both have pasts.
316
00:13:38,967 --> 00:13:40,234
It's just not a big deal.
317
00:13:40,235 --> 00:13:43,455
Well, I know, it's just that...
318
00:13:43,456 --> 00:13:45,023
Well, you know...
319
00:13:45,024 --> 00:13:46,241
What?
320
00:13:46,242 --> 00:13:48,810
None of yours are famous.
321
00:13:51,246 --> 00:13:52,614
Famous?
322
00:13:52,615 --> 00:13:55,233
Oh, please,
she's a dancing chimp
323
00:13:55,234 --> 00:13:57,235
whose 15 minutes
are just about up.
324
00:13:57,236 --> 00:13:59,621
Oh, I knew you'd turn on her.
325
00:13:59,622 --> 00:14:01,556
Besides, it's not like
I haven't dated
326
00:14:01,557 --> 00:14:02,858
someone well-known.
327
00:14:02,859 --> 00:14:04,125
Not this again, Audrey,
328
00:14:04,126 --> 00:14:06,828
I wouldn't call the guy who grew
the largest pumpkin
329
00:14:06,829 --> 00:14:11,183
in Lancaster County
"well-known."
330
00:14:11,184 --> 00:14:13,935
It wasn't just Lancaster, it was
the whole tri-county area,
331
00:14:13,936 --> 00:14:15,803
and that's not
who I'm talking about.
332
00:14:15,804 --> 00:14:17,472
I dated somebody more famous.
333
00:14:17,473 --> 00:14:19,724
Really? More famous
than Punkin' Pete?
334
00:14:19,725 --> 00:14:22,227
It just so happens
my first year of college
335
00:14:22,228 --> 00:14:24,629
I had quite the little fling
with Jerry Waldman.
336
00:14:24,630 --> 00:14:26,915
Who's Jerry Waldman?
337
00:14:26,916 --> 00:14:28,450
Oh, just a brilliant
law student
338
00:14:28,451 --> 00:14:31,386
who would eventually go on
to become... Here we go...
339
00:14:31,387 --> 00:14:35,824
The Chief Justice of the Supreme
Court of the State of New York.
340
00:14:35,825 --> 00:14:38,159
Really? You, uh... You dated him?
Yep.
341
00:14:38,160 --> 00:14:41,246
The Honorable Jerome Waldman.
342
00:14:41,247 --> 00:14:43,632
Ha, he's bald.
343
00:14:43,633 --> 00:14:46,351
Mine's hot and yours
is a chrome dome.
344
00:14:46,352 --> 00:14:49,287
He is the youngest Supreme Court
Justice in history.
345
00:14:49,288 --> 00:14:51,656
A genius at constitutional law.
346
00:14:51,657 --> 00:14:52,908
Because he was studying
347
00:14:52,909 --> 00:14:55,293
while everyone else
was combing their hair.
348
00:14:55,294 --> 00:14:57,311
He had a thick head
of hair when I dated him.
349
00:14:57,312 --> 00:14:59,080
It's too bad things
didn't work out
350
00:14:59,081 --> 00:15:01,683
because you could've been
Mrs. Audrey Baldman.
351
00:15:01,684 --> 00:15:03,118
It's Waldman.
352
00:15:03,119 --> 00:15:04,769
Not anymore.
353
00:15:08,241 --> 00:15:09,540
Hey, Timmy.
354
00:15:09,541 --> 00:15:11,759
Hello, sir.
I was worried sick about you.
355
00:15:11,760 --> 00:15:13,111
So did you do it?
I did.
356
00:15:13,112 --> 00:15:15,613
And it actually went quite well.
It turns out she felt
357
00:15:15,614 --> 00:15:17,849
much the same way I did
and was also relieved.
358
00:15:17,850 --> 00:15:21,235
Great. Okay, to recap
and be totally clear:
359
00:15:21,236 --> 00:15:22,704
You're totally broken up,
360
00:15:22,705 --> 00:15:24,222
all ties cut, no regrets,
361
00:15:24,223 --> 00:15:26,641
and you have no feelings
for her whatsoever.
362
00:15:26,642 --> 00:15:28,776
Well, I don't know if...
Yes or no?
363
00:15:30,762 --> 00:15:32,097
Yes.
364
00:15:32,098 --> 00:15:34,215
Suneetha and I are un-engaged.
Hm.
365
00:15:34,216 --> 00:15:36,301
And we were even able
to remain friends.
366
00:15:36,302 --> 00:15:37,802
And I have you to thank, sir.
367
00:15:37,803 --> 00:15:39,921
I wish there was
some way I could repay you.
368
00:15:39,922 --> 00:15:43,959
Well, there might be.
369
00:15:43,960 --> 00:15:45,694
Oh, really? How?
370
00:15:45,695 --> 00:15:49,781
Oh, I don't know,
maybe give me her number?
371
00:15:49,782 --> 00:15:50,965
Her phone number?
372
00:15:50,966 --> 00:15:52,500
Hm.
373
00:15:52,501 --> 00:15:53,652
Why?
374
00:16:06,499 --> 00:16:08,083
You told him, huh?
375
00:16:08,084 --> 00:16:09,601
What's so funny?
376
00:16:09,602 --> 00:16:11,269
What I feel for Suneetha...
377
00:16:11,270 --> 00:16:14,388
Oh, you feel, do you, sir?
That's a good one!
378
00:16:14,389 --> 00:16:17,042
Do you seriously believe
she would go from a young,
379
00:16:17,043 --> 00:16:20,045
taut-skinned, reasonably
attractive man of her same caste
380
00:16:20,046 --> 00:16:22,047
with a great head
of jet-black hair to...
381
00:16:22,048 --> 00:16:23,748
Well, the opposite of all that?
382
00:16:25,368 --> 00:16:28,035
Wow. That is really mean.
383
00:16:28,036 --> 00:16:31,072
Spend a day at my house,
I'll show you mean.
384
00:16:31,073 --> 00:16:34,275
I don't care what you say.
I've never felt this way before.
385
00:16:34,276 --> 00:16:35,777
I do hope
she can hear your voice
386
00:16:35,778 --> 00:16:40,031
from the splat of her vomit
hitting the sidewalk.
387
00:16:40,032 --> 00:16:41,933
So mean.
388
00:16:41,934 --> 00:16:44,418
Now, if your mind
is really made up,
389
00:16:44,419 --> 00:16:47,054
I suggest you get a move on.
She's going back to India.
390
00:16:47,055 --> 00:16:49,223
She'll be leaving
from the airport soon.
391
00:16:49,224 --> 00:16:51,760
What?
Why didn't you tell me?
392
00:16:51,761 --> 00:16:54,929
Come on. How do I look?
393
00:16:54,930 --> 00:16:57,082
Like Martina Navratilova.
394
00:16:57,083 --> 00:16:58,466
Yeah?
395
00:16:58,467 --> 00:17:00,802
She's a handsome woman.
I'll take it.
396
00:17:02,004 --> 00:17:03,705
See ya.
397
00:17:03,706 --> 00:17:08,093
Well, this is a new low,
even for him.
398
00:17:08,094 --> 00:17:09,343
What is?
399
00:17:09,344 --> 00:17:11,579
To pretend he had
my interests at heart.
400
00:17:11,580 --> 00:17:13,715
But it was all just
a facade to get rid of me
401
00:17:13,716 --> 00:17:16,584
so he could make
a move on Suneetha.
402
00:17:16,585 --> 00:17:18,269
Uh, listen, Timmy,
403
00:17:18,270 --> 00:17:19,971
Russell's not always
a great guy.
404
00:17:19,972 --> 00:17:21,890
But I gotta defend him here.
405
00:17:21,891 --> 00:17:25,143
He's been in love with Suneetha
since he first laid eyes on her.
406
00:17:25,144 --> 00:17:26,745
I'm sorry, what?
407
00:17:26,746 --> 00:17:28,045
It's true.
408
00:17:28,046 --> 00:17:30,848
But he didn't do anything
out of respect for you.
409
00:17:30,849 --> 00:17:32,200
He waited till you broke up
410
00:17:32,201 --> 00:17:34,752
and made sure
it was your decision.
411
00:17:37,472 --> 00:17:40,508
I can't quite believe it. Um...
412
00:17:40,509 --> 00:17:42,994
Oh, perhaps I was wrong
about him.
413
00:17:42,995 --> 00:17:46,364
Mm-hm. Well, maybe you should've
paid a little more attention.
414
00:17:46,365 --> 00:17:48,633
Glad I'm not your best friend.
415
00:17:50,052 --> 00:17:52,703
I mean, unless you want
me to be.
416
00:17:57,543 --> 00:17:58,876
Suneetha, wait.
417
00:17:58,877 --> 00:18:01,679
You got time, buddy,
this is gonna take a while.
418
00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:04,149
Russell,
what are you doing here?
419
00:18:04,150 --> 00:18:07,334
I... I just...
I wanted to tell you that...
420
00:18:08,620 --> 00:18:10,422
God, this is harder
than I thought.
421
00:18:10,423 --> 00:18:13,041
That's what she said.
422
00:18:13,042 --> 00:18:16,310
I got that from you.
It makes me laugh every time.
423
00:18:16,311 --> 00:18:18,847
Yeah, well, that's solid, it's
one of the classics.
424
00:18:18,848 --> 00:18:20,047
We have so much in common.
425
00:18:20,048 --> 00:18:22,784
We like the same jokes.
426
00:18:22,785 --> 00:18:25,986
Uh, you're smart and beautiful,
and I'm smart and...
427
00:18:25,987 --> 00:18:28,489
Do you know who
Martina Navratilova is?
428
00:18:28,490 --> 00:18:31,259
Yes. She's a handsome woman.
429
00:18:31,260 --> 00:18:32,377
Thank you.
430
00:18:32,378 --> 00:18:33,745
Listen, I know this is crazy,
431
00:18:33,746 --> 00:18:35,563
and it's sudden,
but I actually...
432
00:18:35,564 --> 00:18:37,999
Me too, Russell.
433
00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:39,734
What?
434
00:18:39,735 --> 00:18:41,887
Since that first day
at the airport,
435
00:18:41,888 --> 00:18:44,322
I've had these
feelings for you as well.
436
00:18:44,323 --> 00:18:46,908
You have? Really?
437
00:18:46,909 --> 00:18:50,094
I tried to hide them,
I didn't want Timmy to know.
438
00:18:50,095 --> 00:18:52,363
Well, Timmy knows.
I just told him.
439
00:18:52,364 --> 00:18:54,765
It's on the up and up now,
there's nothing to hide.
440
00:18:54,766 --> 00:18:58,870
You can take that trunk out.
You gotta be kidding me.
441
00:18:58,871 --> 00:19:00,438
Russell, as much as
I'd love to stay
442
00:19:00,439 --> 00:19:02,073
and see where this goes,
I can't.
443
00:19:02,074 --> 00:19:04,008
I must return to Mumbai.
444
00:19:04,009 --> 00:19:05,259
No.
445
00:19:05,260 --> 00:19:07,195
But we'll always
have this moment.
446
00:19:07,196 --> 00:19:11,666
This perfect moment
will just belong to us.
447
00:19:16,171 --> 00:19:18,172
Goodbye, Russell.
448
00:19:22,561 --> 00:19:23,845
Goodbye, sweet Suneetha.
449
00:19:35,590 --> 00:19:37,626
Hello?
450
00:19:37,627 --> 00:19:39,177
Oh, hi.
451
00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:42,113
Yes, how'd it go?
452
00:19:42,114 --> 00:19:43,798
Really?
453
00:19:43,799 --> 00:19:45,183
And then what?
454
00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:48,819
Then I kissed him goodbye
and got in the cab.
455
00:19:48,820 --> 00:19:51,939
Thank you so much for doing
that for me, Suneetha.
456
00:19:51,940 --> 00:19:54,241
That was very sweet
and most generous of you.
457
00:19:54,242 --> 00:19:56,344
I was happy to do it.
458
00:19:56,345 --> 00:20:00,765
You know, uh, I wonder if we may
have acted a bit hastily
459
00:20:00,766 --> 00:20:04,602
in calling off our engagement.
460
00:20:04,603 --> 00:20:06,454
Suneetha?
461
00:20:06,455 --> 00:20:10,975
Oh, I'm sorry, I was just
thinking about Russell.
462
00:20:10,976 --> 00:20:13,127
He is very sweet
463
00:20:13,128 --> 00:20:15,563
and kind of sexy in a...
464
00:20:15,564 --> 00:20:18,199
Safe travels, goodbye.
465
00:20:22,922 --> 00:20:24,739
And in news from Albany,
466
00:20:24,740 --> 00:20:27,675
today New York State Supreme
Court Justice Jerry Waldman
467
00:20:27,676 --> 00:20:29,911
made a dramatic announcement:
468
00:20:29,912 --> 00:20:32,180
In the interests
of living my life
469
00:20:32,181 --> 00:20:35,917
from here forward in an honest
and truthful way,
470
00:20:35,918 --> 00:20:38,903
I would like to say
on the record
471
00:20:38,904 --> 00:20:41,506
that I am gay.
472
00:20:43,325 --> 00:20:45,977
I am a gay American.
473
00:20:45,978 --> 00:20:47,362
Oh, my God!
474
00:20:47,363 --> 00:20:49,614
Audrey! Get in here!
475
00:20:49,615 --> 00:20:51,816
Baldman's gay!
33849
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