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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,075 --> 00:00:07,524 Oh, you got a call. 2 00:00:07,524 --> 00:00:09,285 -Oh yeah, who? -Andy Griffith. 3 00:00:09,285 --> 00:00:10,493 [KEYBOARD CLICKING] 4 00:00:10,493 --> 00:00:12,322 -Who? -Andy Griffith? 5 00:00:13,047 --> 00:00:15,946 -Andy Griffith? -Yeah, Andy Griffith. 6 00:00:16,775 --> 00:00:19,433 Andy Griffith? I don't know Andy Griffith. 7 00:00:19,433 --> 00:00:21,435 -Are you sure? -That's what he said. 8 00:00:22,332 --> 00:00:25,197 Andy Griffith? Are you sure it was Griffith, "ith"? 9 00:00:26,371 --> 00:00:28,683 Yes, Andy Griffith... "ith". 10 00:00:31,100 --> 00:00:33,930 I don't know Andy Griffith. Why would he call me? 11 00:00:33,930 --> 00:00:35,690 I don't know. Here's the number. 12 00:00:36,588 --> 00:00:37,623 Andy Griffith. 13 00:00:38,521 --> 00:00:40,695 -I'll dial it. -No, no, no, I'll do it. 14 00:00:41,351 --> 00:00:43,698 -[PHONE BEEPS] -It's very strange. 15 00:00:45,942 --> 00:00:48,289 Hello. Hi, is Andy Griffith there? 16 00:00:49,601 --> 00:00:50,774 Randy Rifkin? 17 00:00:53,536 --> 00:00:54,571 I had the TV on. 18 00:00:55,538 --> 00:00:56,849 Hey, Randy. 19 00:00:59,024 --> 00:01:01,268 ♪ [THEME MUSIC PLAYING] 20 00:01:05,617 --> 00:01:07,032 FRAN: Come on. Don't be shy. 21 00:01:07,032 --> 00:01:08,620 -JAMIE: Okay. Are you ready? -Ready. 22 00:01:11,174 --> 00:01:13,521 -BOTH: No, no, no, no. -Why not? 23 00:01:13,521 --> 00:01:15,316 -Not sexy enough. -Too sexy. 24 00:01:15,316 --> 00:01:17,870 She is going to the hospital for God sakes. 25 00:01:17,870 --> 00:01:20,252 What? Victoria Secret models don't get sick? 26 00:01:20,252 --> 00:01:22,703 -I think he might like it. -Work it, girl. 27 00:01:23,048 --> 00:01:26,155 Here. Try something like this. This looks good. 28 00:01:26,155 --> 00:01:28,157 Yeah, if I were Louisa May Alcott. 29 00:01:30,504 --> 00:01:31,539 Excuse me. 30 00:01:32,402 --> 00:01:35,060 Do you carry these in full figure sizes? 31 00:01:36,061 --> 00:01:38,236 -You want that in full figure? -Yes. 32 00:01:38,236 --> 00:01:40,203 -Is that for your wife? -Yes. 33 00:01:40,755 --> 00:01:44,311 -She's a full-figured gal, huh? -Yes. 34 00:01:44,311 --> 00:01:46,278 Yeah, right whatever. It's back there. 35 00:01:46,278 --> 00:01:47,245 Thank you. 36 00:01:47,935 --> 00:01:49,247 Wife, yeah, right. 37 00:01:50,455 --> 00:01:51,525 Try this. 38 00:01:51,525 --> 00:01:53,837 You don't want me to look good for Dr. Griffin. 39 00:01:53,837 --> 00:01:55,529 What are you talking about? 40 00:01:55,529 --> 00:01:57,496 Of course I want you to look good. 41 00:01:57,496 --> 00:01:59,671 Why wouldn't I want you to look good? 42 00:01:59,671 --> 00:02:02,260 But...You're his patient. He's your doctor. 43 00:02:02,260 --> 00:02:05,194 -He's gonna operate on you. -It's not an operation. 44 00:02:05,194 --> 00:02:07,644 It's a minor procedure. Five minutes and it's over. 45 00:02:07,644 --> 00:02:09,577 The rest of the time I'm making an impression. 46 00:02:09,577 --> 00:02:11,855 Hey, you know what? I once got my tooth pulled 47 00:02:11,855 --> 00:02:13,236 just to meet a dentist. 48 00:02:13,236 --> 00:02:15,376 -You did? -Yeah, it's the one right here. 49 00:02:15,376 --> 00:02:17,206 Yeah, well, it's not appropriate. 50 00:02:17,206 --> 00:02:19,069 Okay. How about this? 51 00:02:19,622 --> 00:02:21,969 Honey, black for surgery? 52 00:02:21,969 --> 00:02:24,730 I don't think that's the statement you wanna make. 53 00:02:25,075 --> 00:02:28,596 -It's surgery, not a date. -It's a date. 54 00:02:28,596 --> 00:02:30,840 She is lying there unconscious. 55 00:02:30,840 --> 00:02:33,877 What? You've never been on a date like that before? 56 00:02:33,877 --> 00:02:35,707 Listen to me, you. This is my thing. 57 00:02:35,707 --> 00:02:38,054 I have to find out why I'm not getting pregnant. 58 00:02:38,054 --> 00:02:40,332 You go and make your own appointment with him. 59 00:02:40,332 --> 00:02:41,851 I might. I just might. 60 00:02:41,851 --> 00:02:44,612 Oh, God, you guys are so pathetic. 61 00:02:44,612 --> 00:02:46,649 It's just sad. Can I come? 62 00:02:51,757 --> 00:02:53,587 Well, I never saw the memo. 63 00:02:53,587 --> 00:02:55,554 Come on, Paulie, we've got to go. 64 00:02:55,554 --> 00:02:57,384 It's not a memo that I saw. 65 00:02:57,384 --> 00:02:59,075 Would you get off the phone already? 66 00:02:59,075 --> 00:03:00,766 Nobody's saying you didn't send the memo. 67 00:03:00,766 --> 00:03:03,044 Hollis, nobody is calling you a liar. 68 00:03:03,044 --> 00:03:04,529 Hey, listen, you're the one who insisted 69 00:03:04,529 --> 00:03:06,047 on taking James to the hospital. 70 00:03:06,047 --> 00:03:07,739 I'm not gonna not be with James for this. 71 00:03:07,739 --> 00:03:09,223 So get off the phone. 72 00:03:09,223 --> 00:03:11,363 You know what, Hollis... Don't come down now. 73 00:03:11,363 --> 00:03:13,538 Don't come down because this is really not-- 74 00:03:13,538 --> 00:03:15,919 Okay. Fine. Come on down now. 75 00:03:15,919 --> 00:03:18,543 This guy is gonna suck the life right out of me. 76 00:03:19,958 --> 00:03:22,409 Hey, Paulie, you got more of these pens? 77 00:03:22,409 --> 00:03:24,411 -Why? -I really like this one. 78 00:03:24,411 --> 00:03:25,791 It's got terrific action. Look at this. 79 00:03:25,791 --> 00:03:27,517 [CLICKS PEN REPEATEDLY] 80 00:03:29,105 --> 00:03:30,210 It's a pen. 81 00:03:31,003 --> 00:03:33,799 -Can I have it? -Take the pen. 82 00:03:33,799 --> 00:03:36,112 Good. Thanks. Come on, let's get you out of here. 83 00:03:36,112 --> 00:03:38,804 I can't. He's gotta come over, he's got to yell at me first. 84 00:03:38,804 --> 00:03:40,703 -What now? -Yeah. 85 00:03:40,703 --> 00:03:43,188 I violated some company policy or something. 86 00:03:43,188 --> 00:03:44,672 Oh, really? What'd you do? 87 00:03:44,672 --> 00:03:46,985 Do you remember the commercial I shot for Jamie's boss? 88 00:03:46,985 --> 00:03:48,158 It was a thing of beauty, Paulie. 89 00:03:48,158 --> 00:03:50,126 Whatever. If seems there's a memo 90 00:03:50,126 --> 00:03:52,059 that the company employees are not allowed 91 00:03:52,059 --> 00:03:55,304 to align themselves publicly with political candidates. 92 00:03:55,304 --> 00:03:56,995 Come on, Paulie. This guy is an idiot. 93 00:03:56,995 --> 00:03:59,066 Yeah, but to such an extent you can't imagine. 94 00:03:59,066 --> 00:04:01,482 What? You're going to stick around for him? 95 00:04:02,311 --> 00:04:03,760 You're right. Let's get out of here. 96 00:04:03,760 --> 00:04:05,314 Yeah, let's get out of here. 97 00:04:05,314 --> 00:04:07,661 -I really do like this pen. -Keep the pen. 98 00:04:08,351 --> 00:04:10,353 -Paul? -Hi, Hollis. 99 00:04:10,353 --> 00:04:11,699 -Leaving early? -Ah... 100 00:04:12,735 --> 00:04:14,944 -What are you writing now? -Nothing. 101 00:04:15,289 --> 00:04:18,465 Because I'm in the middle of a little meeting. 102 00:04:18,465 --> 00:04:21,882 -Uh-huh. Little meeting? -Is that against the rules now? 103 00:04:21,882 --> 00:04:23,884 I sent out a memo about using company time 104 00:04:23,884 --> 00:04:25,748 for meetings of a personal nature. 105 00:04:25,748 --> 00:04:29,199 No, this is not personal. Actually, this is my agent. 106 00:04:29,855 --> 00:04:31,271 -Your agent? -Yeah. 107 00:04:32,410 --> 00:04:34,274 -Really? -Yeah. 108 00:04:35,551 --> 00:04:38,657 -I don't believe we met. -No, I don't believe we have. 109 00:04:38,657 --> 00:04:41,350 -I'm Hollis, Hollis Pavel. -Ira. 110 00:04:41,729 --> 00:04:43,559 -Ira? -Unibal. 111 00:04:47,079 --> 00:04:48,598 -Uniball? -Yes. 112 00:04:49,737 --> 00:04:52,050 -Like the pen? -No, one "L". 113 00:04:52,050 --> 00:04:53,776 Unibal. It's Portuguese. 114 00:04:55,950 --> 00:04:59,644 -What agency are you with? -What agency? Unibal Talent. 115 00:05:00,921 --> 00:05:03,751 I have no record of Paul having representation. 116 00:05:03,751 --> 00:05:05,166 That's 'cause I just signed with him. 117 00:05:05,166 --> 00:05:06,306 Yes, indeed, he did 118 00:05:06,306 --> 00:05:08,135 and we could not be more excited. 119 00:05:08,135 --> 00:05:10,448 You see, we see Mr. Buchman as a very valuable 120 00:05:10,448 --> 00:05:11,725 and exceptionally talented-- 121 00:05:11,725 --> 00:05:15,073 -Please! You don't have to-- -No, no, no... 122 00:05:15,073 --> 00:05:18,421 Lot of agents out there fighting for Mr. Buchman's signature 123 00:05:18,421 --> 00:05:20,354 -as you well know. -Yeah, I didn't. 124 00:05:20,354 --> 00:05:22,736 Well, there has been, and we are very excited 125 00:05:22,736 --> 00:05:25,117 and feel privileged that he selected us. 126 00:05:25,773 --> 00:05:27,775 So you went with Unibal, did you? 127 00:05:27,775 --> 00:05:30,537 I did. I did because, Hollis, to me, it's really a question 128 00:05:30,537 --> 00:05:32,849 of do you want to be a little fish in a big pond, 129 00:05:32,849 --> 00:05:34,644 or a big fish in a little pond? 130 00:05:34,644 --> 00:05:37,578 -So you chose the...? -Big fish tiny little pond. 131 00:05:38,165 --> 00:05:40,892 Actually it's good that you're here, Mr. Uniball. 132 00:05:40,892 --> 00:05:42,963 -Unibal. Unibal. -One L. 133 00:05:44,930 --> 00:05:46,863 Because I came down to notify you, Paul, 134 00:05:46,863 --> 00:05:48,382 of a little meeting we're gonna have 135 00:05:48,382 --> 00:05:50,384 to discuss your breach of corporate policy. 136 00:05:50,798 --> 00:05:53,042 That's gonna be at 2:30, upstairs. 137 00:05:53,042 --> 00:05:54,526 -Is that today? -Yes. 138 00:05:54,526 --> 00:05:57,943 -Oh, perhaps I should be there. -Yes, perhaps you should. 139 00:05:57,943 --> 00:06:01,499 That's good. Terrific. Okay? 2:30, upstairs. 140 00:06:03,121 --> 00:06:05,192 -IRA: Here we go. -Where did you get that pen? 141 00:06:05,192 --> 00:06:08,264 What this? Actually, I don't remember. Why? 142 00:06:08,264 --> 00:06:09,438 Oh nothing. 143 00:06:16,755 --> 00:06:18,550 -Hey. -Hey, what are you doing here? 144 00:06:18,550 --> 00:06:19,793 What am I doing here? 145 00:06:19,793 --> 00:06:21,001 I told you you didn't have to come. 146 00:06:21,001 --> 00:06:22,140 Fran is going to take me. 147 00:06:22,140 --> 00:06:24,591 Honey, I'm taking you. I want to take you. 148 00:06:25,177 --> 00:06:27,317 -I thought you had work to do. -No. 149 00:06:27,317 --> 00:06:29,872 -I thought you had a meeting. -It's not important. 150 00:06:29,872 --> 00:06:31,218 I mean, you're going to the hospital. 151 00:06:31,218 --> 00:06:32,392 You're having an operation. 152 00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:34,773 It's not an operation. It's a minor procedure. 153 00:06:34,773 --> 00:06:37,155 -Okay. Okay. What is this? -What? 154 00:06:37,155 --> 00:06:38,156 This? 155 00:06:38,639 --> 00:06:40,607 -That? Nothing. -I can see that. 156 00:06:41,608 --> 00:06:43,230 -What is it? -You like it? 157 00:06:43,955 --> 00:06:45,853 Yeah, but more, importantly, 158 00:06:45,853 --> 00:06:48,925 I think the very handsome doctor boy is gonna love this. 159 00:06:49,512 --> 00:06:51,445 -You think so? -Oh, yes. 160 00:06:51,445 --> 00:06:54,310 Good. What slippers do you like? My blue ones or these? 161 00:06:54,310 --> 00:06:55,553 -Sweetie? -What? 162 00:06:55,553 --> 00:06:58,107 -It's an outpatient procedure. -I know. 163 00:06:58,107 --> 00:07:00,558 So which sweater? The pink one or the gold one with buttons? 164 00:07:00,903 --> 00:07:03,457 -Am I me or Dr. Griffin? -I'll just take both. 165 00:07:04,734 --> 00:07:05,977 -Are you nervous? -No. 166 00:07:05,977 --> 00:07:07,461 -Because you can be nervous. -I know. 167 00:07:07,461 --> 00:07:09,083 -You're allowed to be nervous. -I know, but I'm not. 168 00:07:09,083 --> 00:07:11,776 'Cause you're packing like we're going overseas here. 169 00:07:11,776 --> 00:07:13,191 I just want options. 170 00:07:13,191 --> 00:07:15,504 Well, I'm sure Dr. Griffin will be very impressed. 171 00:07:15,504 --> 00:07:16,574 [BUZZER SOUNDS] 172 00:07:16,574 --> 00:07:18,507 -Who is that? Fran? -Yeah, let her in, will you? 173 00:07:18,507 --> 00:07:19,784 I'm going with you. 174 00:07:19,784 --> 00:07:21,682 I wanna be there when you wake up. 175 00:07:22,372 --> 00:07:23,546 Hey. 176 00:07:23,546 --> 00:07:25,617 Okay. Now, do I gotta go put on a tuxedo? 177 00:07:26,618 --> 00:07:28,931 -What are you doing? -What? You don't like it? 178 00:07:28,931 --> 00:07:30,864 -I can't believe you did this. -FRAN: What? 179 00:07:30,864 --> 00:07:33,556 You went home and changed to impress Dr. Griffin. 180 00:07:33,556 --> 00:07:34,592 He's that good looking? 181 00:07:34,592 --> 00:07:35,627 -Yeah. -Oh, yeah. 182 00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:44,187 -How's my lipstick? -It's very straight and even. 183 00:07:44,187 --> 00:07:45,257 How's mine? 184 00:07:45,257 --> 00:07:47,259 You're both very beautiful and perfect. 185 00:07:47,259 --> 00:07:48,468 So unfair. 186 00:07:48,468 --> 00:07:50,055 You're not coming in there with me. 187 00:07:50,055 --> 00:07:51,678 TANNOY: Dr. Griffin, Dr. Griffin, 188 00:07:51,678 --> 00:07:53,196 please report to pediatrics. 189 00:07:53,196 --> 00:07:54,681 Oh, my God. Come on. Where's pediatrics? 190 00:07:54,681 --> 00:07:55,716 That way. 191 00:07:56,165 --> 00:07:57,580 Hey, Fran, are we going to lunch? 192 00:07:57,580 --> 00:07:58,616 I'll be right back. 193 00:07:59,893 --> 00:08:01,757 So what? So you decided to stay. 194 00:08:01,757 --> 00:08:03,034 Yeah, she keeps telling me to go 195 00:08:03,034 --> 00:08:04,311 but I don't think she wants me to-- 196 00:08:04,311 --> 00:08:05,830 -Oh, it's just a ruse. -It's a big ruse. 197 00:08:05,830 --> 00:08:07,935 -Yeah, for your benefit. -She's putting on a brave face. 198 00:08:07,935 --> 00:08:09,316 Exactly. 199 00:08:09,316 --> 00:08:11,456 -How could we miss him? -I don't know. 200 00:08:11,456 --> 00:08:13,803 -Pediatrics is so small. -You know, Jamie, there's-- 201 00:08:13,803 --> 00:08:14,873 TANNOY: Dr. Griffin, Dr. Griffin, 202 00:08:14,873 --> 00:08:15,943 BOTH: Sh, sh, sh! 203 00:08:15,943 --> 00:08:17,255 TANNOY: please report to the cafeteria. 204 00:08:17,255 --> 00:08:18,808 -Where's the cafeteria? -This way. 205 00:08:20,741 --> 00:08:22,191 See? See what you're seeing there? 206 00:08:22,191 --> 00:08:24,124 Very common syndrome, very common. 207 00:08:24,124 --> 00:08:25,988 You learn all about it first year of med school. 208 00:08:25,988 --> 00:08:27,058 What? What is that? 209 00:08:27,472 --> 00:08:30,889 The doctor as God, as deity. 210 00:08:30,889 --> 00:08:32,512 You see, the patient comes in here 211 00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:33,858 with fragile psyche. 212 00:08:33,858 --> 00:08:35,929 And they have to build the doctor up 213 00:08:35,929 --> 00:08:37,931 to uh, almost God-like status 214 00:08:37,931 --> 00:08:40,071 describing to him super human qualities 215 00:08:40,071 --> 00:08:42,107 so that in their mind, 216 00:08:42,107 --> 00:08:44,109 they can trust the doctor with the operation. 217 00:08:44,109 --> 00:08:45,697 It's just a minor procedure. 218 00:08:46,146 --> 00:08:48,286 -You know what I'm saying. -Yeah. 219 00:08:48,286 --> 00:08:49,908 So this whole hoopla about Griffin, 220 00:08:49,908 --> 00:08:51,496 that's just a charade? 221 00:08:51,496 --> 00:08:53,360 Oh, no. I mean, he's a good-looking fella, 222 00:08:53,360 --> 00:08:54,464 -don't get me wrong. -No, no. 223 00:08:54,464 --> 00:08:56,363 I'm not saying he's a piece of dog meat. 224 00:08:56,363 --> 00:08:59,193 I mean, he's unquestionably a very handsome man. 225 00:08:59,193 --> 00:09:02,300 -"Unquestionably"? -Although, between you and me, 226 00:09:02,680 --> 00:09:04,509 I think he wears a little make-up. 227 00:09:05,890 --> 00:09:08,409 -Make-up? -A little. A little base, yeah. 228 00:09:08,755 --> 00:09:10,688 -Huh! -And maybe some eyeliner. 229 00:09:10,688 --> 00:09:12,413 But the women they go nuts for this guy. 230 00:09:12,413 --> 00:09:13,449 Boy, that is something. 231 00:09:13,449 --> 00:09:14,692 And I'll tell you something. 232 00:09:14,692 --> 00:09:16,521 He is no more attractive than you and me. 233 00:09:16,521 --> 00:09:17,591 -Is that right? -Yeah, yeah. 234 00:09:17,591 --> 00:09:19,248 in fact, you're looking terrific these days. 235 00:09:19,248 --> 00:09:21,457 -So are you. -Me? Really? You think so? 236 00:09:21,457 --> 00:09:23,217 Yeah, we're both good looking guys. 237 00:09:23,217 --> 00:09:25,012 We are, yeah. What do you do to your hair? 238 00:09:25,012 --> 00:09:28,015 It's like you blow dry it, it's fluffy. It's not flat. 239 00:09:28,015 --> 00:09:29,983 -I got a certain cream I use. -Really? 240 00:09:29,983 --> 00:09:32,433 -But you lost weight-- -No, you know what I do? 241 00:09:32,433 --> 00:09:34,332 I do these ab crunches. They're not sit-ups. 242 00:09:34,332 --> 00:09:36,955 They're like just crunches, you know, side to side. 243 00:09:36,955 --> 00:09:38,267 -You know what the secret is? -What? 244 00:09:38,267 --> 00:09:40,165 Little, very tiny. Less is more. 245 00:09:40,165 --> 00:09:43,652 -Really? How many can you do? -Oh, I don't know, five, 6000. 246 00:09:43,652 --> 00:09:46,137 The thing is, the guy, he's a surgeon. 247 00:09:46,137 --> 00:09:48,035 You're a good-looking guy but if you're a surgeon, 248 00:09:48,035 --> 00:09:49,485 then you're devastating. 249 00:09:49,485 --> 00:09:51,556 So even like an ugly surgeon comes off as handsome? 250 00:09:51,556 --> 00:09:53,213 Yeah, it's what kind of doctor you are. 251 00:09:53,213 --> 00:09:56,181 Like an ugly surgeon is more handsome 252 00:09:56,181 --> 00:09:58,045 than a handsome podiatrist. 253 00:09:59,219 --> 00:10:01,255 -How can that be? -It's the way it is. 254 00:10:01,946 --> 00:10:04,569 The doors closed so fast. 255 00:10:04,569 --> 00:10:06,709 -Mr. and Mrs. Buchman? -BOTH: Yes. 256 00:10:08,262 --> 00:10:10,230 -Would you follow me, please? -Now? 257 00:10:10,644 --> 00:10:13,060 -Where's Dr. Griffin? -He'll see you inside. 258 00:10:13,060 --> 00:10:15,338 Oh! I can't believe I missed him. 259 00:10:15,338 --> 00:10:18,134 Hey, I'm not exactly a podiatrist. 260 00:10:18,134 --> 00:10:19,308 Honey, you don't have to stay. 261 00:10:19,308 --> 00:10:20,758 It's a minor procedure, right, Mark? 262 00:10:20,758 --> 00:10:22,725 -Absolutely. -I'm going with you. 263 00:10:22,725 --> 00:10:24,934 -Okay. Bye-bye. -Bye. 264 00:10:24,934 --> 00:10:26,315 We'll see you afterwards. 265 00:10:26,315 --> 00:10:27,730 Don't worry you're in good hands. 266 00:10:27,730 --> 00:10:29,663 It'll be all over before you know it. 267 00:10:29,663 --> 00:10:31,113 We'll see you when you get back. 268 00:10:31,113 --> 00:10:32,632 We'll be waiting for you, all right? 269 00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:34,288 -So don't you worry. -Good luck. I love you. 270 00:10:34,288 --> 00:10:36,808 All right. Okay. Okay. That's enough. Let's go. 271 00:10:36,808 --> 00:10:38,810 -Are we ready? -Yes. 272 00:10:48,717 --> 00:10:50,926 Okay. Take everything off, 273 00:10:50,926 --> 00:10:53,825 and I do mean everything and put this on. 274 00:10:53,825 --> 00:10:56,483 -Ties go in the back. -Actually, I brought my own. 275 00:10:56,483 --> 00:11:00,487 You did? Well, isn't that sweet? Put this on. 276 00:11:01,315 --> 00:11:04,008 -It's not that bad, honey. -Why can't I wear my own? 277 00:11:04,008 --> 00:11:06,942 Because this is a hospital, not the Playboy channel. 278 00:11:07,528 --> 00:11:09,530 This would actually look very nice on you. 279 00:11:09,530 --> 00:11:11,360 I'd like to talk to Dr. Griffin, please. 280 00:11:11,360 --> 00:11:13,569 You can talk to him before you go into the OR. 281 00:11:13,569 --> 00:11:15,675 -Now let's get a move on. -Why can't I talk to him now? 282 00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:17,090 You see? It's all open in the back. 283 00:11:17,090 --> 00:11:19,023 You got a nice breeze going there. 284 00:11:19,368 --> 00:11:21,957 Also you have to take off all your jewelry 285 00:11:21,957 --> 00:11:23,475 -and your make-up. -Why? 286 00:11:23,475 --> 00:11:25,063 You look great without your make-up. 287 00:11:25,063 --> 00:11:27,479 And we have a nice little pair of shoes for you too. 288 00:11:27,479 --> 00:11:29,999 Pretty shoes. You like shoes. 289 00:11:29,999 --> 00:11:31,380 Here's a pretty hat. 290 00:11:31,380 --> 00:11:33,071 You're getting a whole outfit for crying out loud. 291 00:11:33,071 --> 00:11:34,935 Okay. I'm not wearing this. 292 00:11:34,935 --> 00:11:38,249 Honey, if you want the surgery, you don't have any choice. 293 00:11:38,249 --> 00:11:39,975 It's not surgery. It's a minor procedure. 294 00:11:39,975 --> 00:11:40,976 Whatever. 295 00:11:41,701 --> 00:11:43,530 Now, are you going to cooperate or not? 296 00:11:43,530 --> 00:11:45,635 Honey, why don't you just play along with them? 297 00:11:47,189 --> 00:11:50,640 -Or do whatever you want. -I don't have time for this. 298 00:11:50,640 --> 00:11:51,676 [KNOCKING] 299 00:11:52,470 --> 00:11:53,574 What's the problem? 300 00:11:53,574 --> 00:11:55,231 Mark, I wanna wear my own gown. 301 00:11:55,231 --> 00:11:58,165 -Paul, let her wear the gown. -No, no, no, this one. 302 00:11:58,614 --> 00:12:00,340 Oh, isn't this pretty? 303 00:12:00,858 --> 00:12:02,791 -Lisa helped me pick it out. -Really? 304 00:12:02,791 --> 00:12:04,931 -Nurse, let her wear the gown. -But, Doctor, that-- 305 00:12:04,931 --> 00:12:05,932 But what? 306 00:12:06,795 --> 00:12:09,521 The woman is my patient and I'm telling you, 307 00:12:09,521 --> 00:12:12,283 let her wear the gown. Is that understood? 308 00:12:12,283 --> 00:12:13,974 -Yes, Dr. Devenaux. -Good. 309 00:12:17,564 --> 00:12:19,600 -How about that, huh? -[PAUL WHISTLES] 310 00:12:24,674 --> 00:12:27,091 Paulie, I'm telling you I can handle this. 311 00:12:27,091 --> 00:12:28,920 -You're gonna go to my meeting? -IRA: Yes. 312 00:12:29,369 --> 00:12:31,612 -And represent me? -IRA: Yes! 313 00:12:31,612 --> 00:12:33,131 [HOSPITAL LOUDSPEAKER] 314 00:12:35,168 --> 00:12:37,722 Okay. You know, don't you, this is not camp? 315 00:12:37,722 --> 00:12:42,278 -This is like an actual job. -I understand. 316 00:12:42,278 --> 00:12:45,074 Sort of like a livelihood kind of thing for me. 317 00:12:45,074 --> 00:12:47,732 Paulie, come on, it's me and Hollis alone in a room. 318 00:12:47,732 --> 00:12:49,389 How hard can it be? The man is an idiot. 319 00:12:49,389 --> 00:12:51,287 You know, he actually believes that you're my agent. 320 00:12:51,701 --> 00:12:52,737 I rest my case. 321 00:12:53,427 --> 00:12:55,395 All right. Listen. Don't tell them 322 00:12:55,395 --> 00:12:57,052 -what I'm doing today. -IRA: I won't. 323 00:12:57,052 --> 00:12:58,432 Because we're keeping this kind of private. 324 00:12:58,432 --> 00:13:00,055 -Paulie! -All right. 325 00:13:00,055 --> 00:13:01,781 -So if he asks where I am-- -Hey, hey, hey, 326 00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:04,128 has Ira Unibal ever let you down, ever? 327 00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:07,441 Not since I signed with him, no. 328 00:13:07,441 --> 00:13:08,546 Okay. 329 00:13:08,546 --> 00:13:11,514 So relax, go kiss your wife. I'll talk to you later. 330 00:13:11,514 --> 00:13:13,862 -All right. -IRA: Vaya con Dios. 331 00:13:15,864 --> 00:13:17,382 Yeah, I'm good and screwed. 332 00:13:21,870 --> 00:13:23,595 Everyone, this is Mr. Unibal. 333 00:13:25,563 --> 00:13:27,634 Mr. Unibal, allow me to introduce you 334 00:13:27,634 --> 00:13:29,015 to the board of directors. 335 00:13:29,015 --> 00:13:31,155 The majority owners of the Explorer Channel. 336 00:13:33,329 --> 00:13:34,675 [PHONE RINGS] 337 00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:39,128 Nurses station. Mr. Buchman? 338 00:13:41,061 --> 00:13:43,408 -Thank you. Hello? -Paulie, it's me. 339 00:13:43,408 --> 00:13:45,203 Splinky, what sayest thou? 340 00:13:45,203 --> 00:13:47,447 Listen man, we're up that bad, bad creek 341 00:13:47,447 --> 00:13:49,000 without that crucial paddle. 342 00:13:50,243 --> 00:13:51,658 Hollis talking tough? 343 00:13:51,658 --> 00:13:53,384 Mon frere, it is more than just Hollis. 344 00:13:53,384 --> 00:13:55,662 It's the entire board of the Explorer Channel. 345 00:13:55,662 --> 00:13:57,560 -The board is there? -Yes, Paulie 346 00:13:57,560 --> 00:13:59,562 and I have seen parole boards that look friendlier. 347 00:13:59,562 --> 00:14:01,323 Well, what am I supposed to do? 348 00:14:01,323 --> 00:14:02,911 Haul thine arse down here 349 00:14:02,911 --> 00:14:05,051 as swiftly as humanly possible, tout suite. 350 00:14:05,051 --> 00:14:06,190 I can't! 351 00:14:06,190 --> 00:14:07,605 Paulie, I'm telling you as your agent. 352 00:14:08,019 --> 00:14:11,126 Alright, you know what? Just stall them. 353 00:14:11,126 --> 00:14:12,437 Stall them and I'll call you back. 354 00:14:12,437 --> 00:14:13,404 -IRA: All right. -Okay. 355 00:14:13,991 --> 00:14:15,751 -[MACHINES BEEP] -NURSE: There you go. 356 00:14:15,751 --> 00:14:17,132 Are you starting to feel relaxed? 357 00:14:17,132 --> 00:14:19,893 Yesh. I mean yesh. 358 00:14:21,239 --> 00:14:25,140 Yesh. I want to say yesh but I'm saying yesh. 359 00:14:25,140 --> 00:14:27,176 It's just the sedative kicking in. 360 00:14:27,763 --> 00:14:32,181 -DR. GRIFFIN: Hello, Jamie. -Hi, Dr. Griffin! 361 00:14:32,181 --> 00:14:34,252 So how is my patient? Are they treating you okay? 362 00:14:35,150 --> 00:14:37,669 Hi, Dr. Griffin! 363 00:14:37,669 --> 00:14:39,430 We'll be starting in just a minute. 364 00:14:40,155 --> 00:14:42,847 -When? -Now don't be nervous. 365 00:14:43,468 --> 00:14:44,884 Everything will be fine. 366 00:14:47,921 --> 00:14:50,337 ANESTHETIST: Mrs. Buchman, this won't hurt a bit. 367 00:14:50,337 --> 00:14:51,856 Okay. Now listen to me. 368 00:14:51,856 --> 00:14:54,031 The problem is I have a very high tolerance. 369 00:14:54,031 --> 00:14:56,930 I need more than the average dosage to put me out, really. 370 00:14:56,930 --> 00:15:00,278 Okay. Now, Mrs. Buchman, count backwards from ten. 371 00:15:01,383 --> 00:15:02,453 Ten. 372 00:15:07,354 --> 00:15:09,736 Um, how would I page a doctor? 373 00:15:09,736 --> 00:15:11,911 -Who do you want to page? -Dr. Devenaux. 374 00:15:12,877 --> 00:15:14,672 -Dr. Devenaux? -Yeah. 375 00:15:17,847 --> 00:15:18,883 Thank you. 376 00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:22,542 -Paul-- -Listen, I've got an emergency. 377 00:15:22,542 --> 00:15:23,577 -What? -FRAN: James? 378 00:15:23,577 --> 00:15:25,096 No, no, no. She's fine. She's still in surgery. 379 00:15:25,096 --> 00:15:26,580 I just got a thing at the office. 380 00:15:26,580 --> 00:15:28,513 I might be in big trouble. 381 00:15:28,513 --> 00:15:30,343 Jamie, will be asleep for hours. 382 00:15:30,343 --> 00:15:32,345 -You swear? -Absolutely. 383 00:15:32,345 --> 00:15:34,381 I wanna be there when she wakes up. 384 00:15:34,381 --> 00:15:36,142 The minute she starts to come to, we'll beep you. 385 00:15:36,142 --> 00:15:38,178 -You swear? -We both swear. 386 00:15:38,178 --> 00:15:40,525 -Okay. All right. Thank you. -No, no problem. 387 00:15:40,525 --> 00:15:42,113 DR. GRIFFIN: Did you see ERlast night? 388 00:15:42,113 --> 00:15:43,218 ANESTHETIST: Mm, yeah. 389 00:15:43,218 --> 00:15:44,598 See Chicago Hope? 390 00:15:44,598 --> 00:15:45,945 DR. GRIFFIN: That show hasn't worked for me 391 00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:47,394 since Mandy Patinkin left. 392 00:15:48,395 --> 00:15:50,052 You know, I bought 3000 shares of that-- 393 00:15:50,052 --> 00:15:52,020 -Excuse me? -Yeah? 394 00:15:52,020 --> 00:15:54,505 Could you pay a little more attention to me, please? 395 00:15:54,505 --> 00:15:56,058 DR. GRIFFIN: Don't worry. I am. 396 00:15:56,058 --> 00:15:58,336 Well, you're talking about your golf game 397 00:15:58,336 --> 00:15:59,993 and your stock markets, 398 00:15:59,993 --> 00:16:01,891 what you watched on TV last night. 399 00:16:01,891 --> 00:16:05,171 -You have a problem with that? -Yeah, you're operating on me. 400 00:16:05,171 --> 00:16:08,346 It's not really an operation. It's just a minor procedure. 401 00:16:08,346 --> 00:16:10,383 Well, would you just watch what you're doing, please. 402 00:16:10,383 --> 00:16:12,419 Don't worry. I'm very good at this. 403 00:16:12,419 --> 00:16:14,007 So how am I doing, doc? 404 00:16:14,007 --> 00:16:15,491 I don't wanna get sued or anything. 405 00:16:15,491 --> 00:16:17,700 You won't. I just want to know. I need to know. 406 00:16:18,184 --> 00:16:19,668 You won't quote me when you're awake? 407 00:16:19,668 --> 00:16:21,359 I won't quote you. I won't quote you. 408 00:16:22,188 --> 00:16:24,466 Everything seems to be in working order. 409 00:16:24,466 --> 00:16:26,088 -Really? -So far. 410 00:16:26,951 --> 00:16:30,575 So you're saying I'm all right? I can have children? 411 00:16:30,575 --> 00:16:33,302 I'm saying there don't seem to be any medical problems. 412 00:16:33,302 --> 00:16:34,752 What does that mean? 413 00:16:34,752 --> 00:16:38,135 It means when the time is right, one way or another, 414 00:16:38,549 --> 00:16:39,722 you'll have children. 415 00:16:42,932 --> 00:16:44,555 Can you do me one more little favor? 416 00:16:44,555 --> 00:16:45,590 What? 417 00:16:45,590 --> 00:16:47,075 -Can you take off the mask? -No. 418 00:16:47,075 --> 00:16:48,179 -Oh, come on. -Can't. 419 00:16:48,179 --> 00:16:49,387 Yes, you can. Please take off the mask. 420 00:16:49,387 --> 00:16:50,595 I'm all scrubbed up and everything. 421 00:16:50,595 --> 00:16:52,356 Do me one big favor and take off the mask. 422 00:16:52,701 --> 00:16:55,807 -[HE SIGHS] -All right. Go ahead. 423 00:16:59,673 --> 00:17:02,021 ♪ [ANGELIC MUSIC PLAYING] 424 00:17:02,021 --> 00:17:03,539 JAMIE: Wow, you're gorgeous! 425 00:17:05,127 --> 00:17:07,474 DR. GRIFFIN: My broker said Medatron was the way to go. 426 00:17:07,474 --> 00:17:09,166 When I checked the stock market this morning, 427 00:17:09,166 --> 00:17:10,753 it dropped four points. 428 00:17:10,753 --> 00:17:13,515 If I could just find a broker as good as my golf instructor. 429 00:17:17,691 --> 00:17:20,901 Hi, hi, sorry. I got here as soon as I could. 430 00:17:20,901 --> 00:17:24,043 Well, well, here we are. Okay, Paul, tell them. 431 00:17:24,871 --> 00:17:26,148 Yeah, okay, um... 432 00:17:27,287 --> 00:17:29,669 Tell them why you violated company policy 433 00:17:29,669 --> 00:17:31,774 to shoot that political endorsement. 434 00:17:31,774 --> 00:17:32,879 Okay. 435 00:17:32,879 --> 00:17:37,849 -Um, you see I... -Tell them why, Paul. Why? 436 00:17:45,616 --> 00:17:50,448 Because, gentlemen, my client was led astray. 437 00:17:51,139 --> 00:17:54,142 -Yes. By whom you ask. -By who? 438 00:17:54,142 --> 00:17:58,180 By me. I led him astray. I, Ira Unibal. 439 00:17:59,664 --> 00:18:01,321 -You know what, Ira-- -No, no, no, Paul. 440 00:18:01,321 --> 00:18:02,874 Better to let them know the truth 441 00:18:02,874 --> 00:18:04,704 than to let them live in a shroud of deception. 442 00:18:04,704 --> 00:18:05,946 Yeah, I suppose that is true. 443 00:18:05,946 --> 00:18:08,259 I told him I had been given clearance 444 00:18:08,259 --> 00:18:10,951 by everybody in the company, by everyone who is of import 445 00:18:10,951 --> 00:18:12,263 who needed to give me that clearance, 446 00:18:12,263 --> 00:18:14,576 and, folks, it humbles me to have to admit this, but... 447 00:18:15,646 --> 00:18:16,681 I lied. 448 00:18:17,165 --> 00:18:18,856 Yes, I lied to my client. 449 00:18:19,615 --> 00:18:21,065 I lied to my friend. 450 00:18:24,482 --> 00:18:26,174 But most of all, I lied to you. 451 00:18:26,864 --> 00:18:28,486 It's Unibal, one "L", one "L". 452 00:18:29,867 --> 00:18:31,834 -You lied? -Yes. 453 00:18:32,387 --> 00:18:34,492 -You never spoke to them. -Never. 454 00:18:34,941 --> 00:18:36,253 -I never had clearance? -Never. 455 00:18:36,253 --> 00:18:38,531 So I'm out there shooting, I had no clearance from them at all? 456 00:18:38,531 --> 00:18:39,601 None. 457 00:18:44,019 --> 00:18:48,334 I'm horrified. Believe me. I'm mortified. 458 00:18:48,851 --> 00:18:50,267 I am horrified. 459 00:18:50,646 --> 00:18:54,098 I am just mortified and horrified both. 460 00:18:54,098 --> 00:18:57,239 Horrified. I'm mortified. I'm ossified. Is that a word? 461 00:18:57,929 --> 00:19:00,829 Well, I'm mortified and horrified for sure. 462 00:19:01,485 --> 00:19:04,626 That I let myself be duped, 463 00:19:04,626 --> 00:19:06,593 that I was represented by this man 464 00:19:06,593 --> 00:19:08,699 whose ways and tactics were not fully known to me 465 00:19:08,699 --> 00:19:11,840 and then I let him represent me and damage my reputation 466 00:19:11,840 --> 00:19:13,290 and damage your reputation 467 00:19:13,290 --> 00:19:16,189 and the bond that we've all worked so hard here 468 00:19:16,189 --> 00:19:18,157 at the Explorer Channel to achieve. 469 00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:20,435 -I admit Mis-- -Unibal. 470 00:19:21,332 --> 00:19:24,784 Let me just say that you are hereby summarily dismissed. 471 00:19:24,784 --> 00:19:26,061 -But-- -No buts, no buts. 472 00:19:26,061 --> 00:19:28,443 As of this moment, I am no longer represented 473 00:19:28,443 --> 00:19:29,720 -by Unibal Talent. -But-- 474 00:19:29,720 --> 00:19:31,170 What did I say? No buts. 475 00:19:31,170 --> 00:19:33,551 Just get out of here, it's as if we never met! 476 00:19:38,970 --> 00:19:39,971 I can only... 477 00:19:41,249 --> 00:19:43,458 What can I do? I apologize, you know? 478 00:19:43,458 --> 00:19:46,046 -I apologize to you. -We had no idea. 479 00:19:46,668 --> 00:19:52,121 -Believe me, you know, myself... -We should apologize to you. 480 00:19:52,121 --> 00:19:53,847 Well, I don't know if that's... 481 00:19:54,952 --> 00:19:56,850 -If I may just say a few-- -Hollis? 482 00:20:00,578 --> 00:20:04,824 -Sorry. -It's all right. No apology. 483 00:20:04,824 --> 00:20:07,758 You know, I'm certainly glad we settled this issue 484 00:20:07,758 --> 00:20:08,966 and I have some previous commitments, 485 00:20:08,966 --> 00:20:11,037 so I really must bid you all 486 00:20:11,037 --> 00:20:13,419 a very good afternoon. Thank you. 487 00:20:13,419 --> 00:20:14,420 [DOOR CLOSES] 488 00:20:14,420 --> 00:20:16,525 -You were very good. -Ossified? 489 00:20:23,360 --> 00:20:26,328 Hey, James. Hey. 490 00:20:27,226 --> 00:20:29,055 Oh, it's you. It's you, it's you. 491 00:20:29,435 --> 00:20:31,747 How you doing? You okay? 492 00:20:31,747 --> 00:20:34,923 I think so. Did you talk to Dr. Griffin? 493 00:20:34,923 --> 00:20:36,304 I talked to him in the hall, 494 00:20:36,304 --> 00:20:38,754 and he said everything seems to be perfect. 495 00:20:39,410 --> 00:20:41,032 Really? He didn't find anything? 496 00:20:41,032 --> 00:20:42,068 Nothing. 497 00:20:43,069 --> 00:20:45,002 -Yay. -Yay! 498 00:20:46,037 --> 00:20:47,556 So there's nothing wrong with me? 499 00:20:47,556 --> 00:20:49,351 -No. -Yay... 500 00:20:52,803 --> 00:20:55,323 -So how come we're not pregnant? -Oh, don't go there. 501 00:20:55,323 --> 00:20:58,360 -Well no if there's nothing-- -Sweetie, we have good news. 502 00:20:58,360 --> 00:21:01,570 -Let it be for five minutes. -Sorry. 503 00:21:02,019 --> 00:21:05,194 Come on. Just think about something nice. 504 00:21:08,957 --> 00:21:10,717 What do you think of Dr. Griffin? 505 00:21:17,206 --> 00:21:19,070 Could you look up a number for me, please? 506 00:21:19,070 --> 00:21:20,900 It's the Unibal Talent Agency. 507 00:21:20,900 --> 00:21:24,421 It's Unibal, Unibal, one "L". It's Portuguese. 508 00:21:25,318 --> 00:21:27,389 Right? Interesting, no listing? 509 00:21:27,872 --> 00:21:29,046 Right. How about in Queens? 510 00:21:30,150 --> 00:21:31,669 So there's no Unibal Talent Agency 511 00:21:31,669 --> 00:21:33,775 listing in New York. Interesting. 512 00:21:33,775 --> 00:21:36,847 How about New Jersey? Okay. All right. 513 00:21:36,847 --> 00:21:39,574 Well, would you look? Nothing? 514 00:21:39,574 --> 00:21:41,679 So what you're saying here is there is no Unibal Talent Agency 515 00:21:41,679 --> 00:21:44,924 listing in the country? Okay. Thank you. 516 00:21:45,269 --> 00:21:47,823 You know what? Could you just check Portugal? 517 00:21:49,929 --> 00:21:50,930 Really? 39043

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