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Downloaded from
YTS.MX
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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
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You're ok.
4
00:00:30,864 --> 00:00:34,117
Today's a good day.
Today's a good day for you.
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00:00:34,159 --> 00:00:37,579
Today's a good day for you.
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00:00:37,871 --> 00:00:40,040
You're going to church.
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00:00:40,498 --> 00:00:45,003
You're not gonna use today,
you're not gonna use today.
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00:02:03,665 --> 00:02:04,624
Hey hey hey
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00:02:04,666 --> 00:02:08,169
Heroin, heroin, heroin, heroin.
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00:02:08,211 --> 00:02:10,630
That's hard to say-
Heroin.
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00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:12,257
Meth.
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00:02:12,465 --> 00:02:15,760
Just start a
commercial with meth.
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00:02:17,971 --> 00:02:19,472
Can't get serious.
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00:02:21,224 --> 00:02:24,185
Heroin, pain pills.
Are you addicted?
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00:02:24,227 --> 00:02:26,646
Are you addicted?
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00:02:26,688 --> 00:02:29,649
If I wanted heroin and I was
sitting here
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00:02:29,691 --> 00:02:32,652
and had nothing to do,
my brain would go into full
blown
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00:02:32,694 --> 00:02:34,863
"how do we get heroin" planning
mode.
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00:02:34,988 --> 00:02:37,282
I was married.
I was married.
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00:02:38,324 --> 00:02:40,118
I had a bright future.
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00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:42,537
Whereas if I've got some kind of
artistic or
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00:02:42,662 --> 00:02:47,959
creative outlet, then I can say,
let's table that thought about
heroin
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00:02:48,209 --> 00:02:50,920
and let's edit a video.
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00:02:52,964 --> 00:02:56,718
Hi, my name is Josh Litton.
I had a bright future.
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00:02:56,759 --> 00:03:00,972
Then what started out as
fun soon became tragedy.
26
00:03:01,097 --> 00:03:04,934
Then what started out as fun
and soon became a tragedy.
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00:03:19,908 --> 00:03:24,913
It's gonna be a good year.
Making a short film about
recovery.
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00:03:24,954 --> 00:03:27,040
You know, gonna...
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00:03:27,081 --> 00:03:29,375
go to meetings, find a sponsor.
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00:03:33,588 --> 00:03:35,715
It's gonna be a good year.
31
00:03:38,259 --> 00:03:40,220
It's gonna be a good year.
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00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:48,186
Movies have always just been a
place
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00:03:48,228 --> 00:03:54,192
for me to escape reality and,
you know, just get lost in a
world.
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00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:57,070
I love movies.
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00:04:04,452 --> 00:04:07,747
We pray for more of you and less
of us, Lord.
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00:04:07,789 --> 00:04:10,917
Pray for your blessing over this
script
that we're writing, God.
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00:04:10,959 --> 00:04:11,960
Pray that me and Josh just
continue
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00:04:12,001 --> 00:04:16,965
to grow as filmmakers so that
our hearts
and minds are always fixed on
the real
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00:04:17,006 --> 00:04:20,885
agenda here: to tell our stories
in a way
that helps people and gets them
off
40
00:04:20,927 --> 00:04:22,929
drugs and alcohol addictions,
Lord.
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00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:27,350
People that are struggling with
addiction,
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00:04:27,392 --> 00:04:29,936
it's a hard place to be in and
it's
a very isolating place to be in.
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00:04:29,978 --> 00:04:33,273
So I'm hoping that this could
be something that can help
people.
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00:04:59,048 --> 00:05:00,842
The commercials and graduation
videos,
45
00:05:00,883 --> 00:05:04,804
those are like our day jobs -
projects
that we make for the program,
46
00:05:04,846 --> 00:05:08,141
but on the fence,
you know, that's personal.
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00:05:14,522 --> 00:05:18,359
To me, this is all practice for
making
a real short film with actors.
48
00:05:18,401 --> 00:05:22,322
If I only get one shot at this
I'm swinging for the fences.
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00:05:25,241 --> 00:05:31,372
Now, you understand this is an
18-month-long,
Christian faith-based ministry.
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00:05:31,497 --> 00:05:33,374
Alright, that means that when
you come
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00:05:33,499 --> 00:05:36,252
here, you're committed
to living here for 18 months.
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00:05:36,377 --> 00:05:38,921
However, if you decide you want
to leave,
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00:05:38,963 --> 00:05:42,175
I'm going to do everything I can
to try
to encourage you to stay,
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00:05:42,300 --> 00:05:46,012
because I want you to fulfill
your
commitment to overcome your
struggle.
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00:05:46,095 --> 00:05:49,891
Now, we would, first of all,
contact your probation officer
and let
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00:05:49,932 --> 00:05:53,478
them know that you're leaving
you'll pack all of your
belongings up.
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00:05:53,519 --> 00:05:58,024
Get ready and we will take you
to the Interstate 85.
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00:05:58,066 --> 00:05:59,484
There's a Waffle House there,
we'll take you there
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00:05:59,525 --> 00:06:01,527
because if you
want to go somewhere,
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00:06:01,569 --> 00:06:04,864
then we'll help you get to that
point.
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00:06:09,202 --> 00:06:12,330
So a few weeks goes by,
I go to his house.
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00:06:12,455 --> 00:06:17,585
I went to his house, I was so
geeked up dude.
The second I sit on his couch
out, I hear SHINK
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00:06:17,627 --> 00:06:21,589
and I look up and he's got
a revolver pointed right at my
head.
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00:06:21,631 --> 00:06:23,049
He's like 'you think I'm some
kind of bitch?
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00:06:23,091 --> 00:06:24,425
You think you can rob me?
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00:06:24,467 --> 00:06:26,010
I know what you did!'
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00:06:26,177 --> 00:06:28,679
But he squeezed the trigger.
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00:06:28,721 --> 00:06:32,266
And it went CLICK (whoa)
and I saw the whole thing
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00:06:32,308 --> 00:06:36,646
rotate and I saw the hammer hit,
it was loaded and the gun did
not go off.
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00:06:36,687 --> 00:06:37,271
I don't know how.
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00:06:37,647 --> 00:06:40,983
But as soon as it clicked, I
smashed
him in the face as hard as I
could
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00:06:41,025 --> 00:06:43,111
and I ran for my life right out
that door
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00:06:43,152 --> 00:06:45,613
right out here where I
was parked and I bolted.
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00:06:45,655 --> 00:06:47,990
He might still live there,
I don't...
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00:06:48,032 --> 00:06:51,035
Let's go knock on the door,
let's go say 'hi' to him.
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00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:53,287
Yeah man, it's insane.
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00:06:54,956 --> 00:06:56,290
So if you had to give an
elevator pitch
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00:06:56,332 --> 00:06:59,335
for "On the Fence,"
what would that sound like?
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00:06:59,460 --> 00:07:06,008
It's a movie about the first
step in AA.
The main character is realizing
that they
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00:07:06,050 --> 00:07:10,930
are an addict and he's
accepting that fact.
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00:07:13,599 --> 00:07:14,225
In the short film,
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00:07:14,725 --> 00:07:21,023
the whole idea is the guys who
are staying
in the recovery center put
family pictures
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00:07:21,065 --> 00:07:24,235
on this fence, hopefully
to keep them from leaving.
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00:07:24,277 --> 00:07:27,738
A reminder - it'll be the last
thing they see when
they leave the property is their
family,
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00:07:27,780 --> 00:07:31,033
and the reason why they're
getting sober.
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00:07:33,035 --> 00:07:35,705
But this photo is already a
little worn out.
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00:07:35,746 --> 00:07:39,083
Looks like my mom and dad when
they
were still together.
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00:07:42,420 --> 00:07:46,340
We don't like to admit that we
have a drug
problem or just deal with the
reason why
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00:07:46,382 --> 00:07:48,634
we have a drug problem,
so we run a lot of times.
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00:07:48,676 --> 00:07:50,720
I run a lot of times.
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00:07:50,761 --> 00:07:51,762
Every time you run away,
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00:07:51,804 --> 00:07:57,894
you usually hurt them probably
just as
much, if not more than you hurt
yourself.
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00:08:30,551 --> 00:08:31,385
Making movies and writing,
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00:08:31,385 --> 00:08:35,932
it's like therapy for me,
it makes me feel good because it
gets all
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00:08:35,973 --> 00:08:39,227
that nasty, crazy thoughts
in my head out on paper.
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00:08:39,435 --> 00:08:43,064
Until you have something worth
holding
on to, you're not going to let
go of drugs
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00:08:43,105 --> 00:08:46,192
like you have to find something
that is more meaningful,
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00:08:46,234 --> 00:08:47,151
so that you can take the leap
and let go of
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00:08:47,193 --> 00:08:51,280
the thing you don't want to let
go
of, to go grab something new and
scary
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00:08:51,322 --> 00:08:53,908
and see if that holds you
the way that drugs did.
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00:08:53,950 --> 00:08:56,369
Are you the creator of that?
That was really cool, man.
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00:08:56,410 --> 00:08:57,662
Thanks.
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00:09:08,130 --> 00:09:09,173
Oh shit!
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00:09:12,426 --> 00:09:16,055
It's a scene that would be
in a gas station like this.
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00:09:16,180 --> 00:09:19,934
It's a short film and it's a guy
that's
leaving a rehab program that
he's in.
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00:09:19,976 --> 00:09:21,561
This would be perfect, actually.
107
00:09:21,602 --> 00:09:23,729
OK, well give us a call if you
think of something you can do.
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00:09:23,771 --> 00:09:25,439
We sure would appreciate it.
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00:09:25,481 --> 00:09:27,275
You do it this time.
I like it.
110
00:09:27,316 --> 00:09:28,401
You're the director, dammit.
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00:09:28,442 --> 00:09:29,944
Shut up.
112
00:09:29,986 --> 00:09:33,155
We got a short film that we're
making about recovery.
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00:09:33,197 --> 00:09:34,323
Cassidy.
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00:09:34,365 --> 00:09:37,076
I'm Josh.
Pleased to meet you.
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00:09:37,118 --> 00:09:38,786
Cool, we'll give him a call.
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00:09:38,828 --> 00:09:42,915
It's a low slash no-budget
independent
thing we're doing.
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00:09:42,957 --> 00:09:45,001
This guy comes here to meet his
mom
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00:09:45,042 --> 00:09:50,131
who has been enabling him,
and she decides not to enable
him anymore.
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00:09:50,923 --> 00:09:56,095
It's not a big set-up, you know
it would be some lights and some
actors...
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00:10:11,944 --> 00:10:15,197
That's that Methamphetamine,
you know what I mean?
121
00:10:15,239 --> 00:10:16,907
Methamphetamine.
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00:10:16,949 --> 00:10:20,494
90 percent of them,
I pulled myself with pliers.
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00:10:20,995 --> 00:10:24,915
I'm a country boy, you know what
I'm saying?
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00:10:25,082 --> 00:10:31,047
Them things get lose, man, I'll
grab the pliers
HAA! Pull that thing out.
125
00:10:37,428 --> 00:10:43,934
God is stretching me right now
with this
film stuff, a lot of learning to
do.
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00:10:43,976 --> 00:10:47,855
I feel like I'm in over my head.
127
00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:53,736
-Why thank you, sir.
-You're very welcome ma'am.
128
00:10:53,861 --> 00:10:55,988
-You have a good day now.
-You too, stay outta trouble
129
00:10:56,113 --> 00:10:57,198
-I'm trying.
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00:10:58,282 --> 00:10:59,075
I'm Jared Callahan,
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00:10:59,075 --> 00:11:02,787
I'm a local film producer
and I met the guys when they
came
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00:11:02,828 --> 00:11:06,874
to the film festival and Cassidy
told me
the two hour version of his life
story.
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00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:10,503
And I'm all in. I mean,
I have friends and family in
recovery.
134
00:11:10,544 --> 00:11:11,796
I think these stories are
important.
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00:11:11,837 --> 00:11:14,048
So now I'm gonna help these guys
craft their
136
00:11:14,090 --> 00:11:17,718
ideas into a makeable,
hopefully professional short
film.
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00:11:17,760 --> 00:11:20,888
-Pete makes up excuse.
-For taking the pills.
138
00:11:21,138 --> 00:11:23,516
-And then it ends with crazy
like..
-I know it was you!
139
00:11:23,557 --> 00:11:26,018
Under his strength,
kind of even like comes down.
140
00:11:26,060 --> 00:11:29,438
-Pushes him down.
-Yeah, sure. Like a push-shove
down.
141
00:11:29,939 --> 00:11:34,735
Had another brother get kicked
out yesterday because...
142
00:11:34,860 --> 00:11:37,697
Because he failed a drug test.
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00:11:37,822 --> 00:11:39,573
So that's...
144
00:11:39,615 --> 00:11:41,534
Kinda nerve-wracking and
stressful.
145
00:11:41,659 --> 00:11:42,493
They found out that he had been
doing
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00:11:42,493 --> 00:11:47,373
crystal meth for a month and it
was like
their good friend Canyon,
147
00:11:47,498 --> 00:11:51,043
the one that they've been making
videos and commercials with.
148
00:11:55,214 --> 00:11:56,173
So today, we're supposed to be
going
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00:11:56,215 --> 00:12:02,763
for the whole movie and my
experts are
having freak outs in the parking
lot.
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00:12:15,985 --> 00:12:19,572
A lot of you guys know what
we've been
up to a little bit with the
short film.
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00:12:19,697 --> 00:12:22,992
We thought maybe tonight we'd
read you
guys the script that we're
working with.
152
00:12:23,033 --> 00:12:25,077
And then when we're done, seeing
what
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00:12:25,119 --> 00:12:28,456
experiences that you guys have
actually had that are like this.
154
00:12:28,581 --> 00:12:33,169
Exterior, fence post, late
afternoon,
the last post is covered with
hundreds
155
00:12:33,210 --> 00:12:36,547
of faded letters and pictures
nailed into the wood.
156
00:12:39,341 --> 00:12:44,430
Kinda had a meltdown yesterday,
my insecurities came out, you
know,
157
00:12:44,472 --> 00:12:50,227
fear of failure, fear of
rejection
and not being good enough.
158
00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:52,688
"Until you prove that you can
get clean, this
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00:12:52,730 --> 00:12:55,941
family's done being a part of
your life."
Mother continues,
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00:12:55,983 --> 00:13:01,113
"I thought my actions were
loving you, but
they were only feeding your
addictions."
161
00:13:01,155 --> 00:13:02,656
She begins to tear up.
162
00:13:02,782 --> 00:13:05,951
"Now my actions will match my
love for you."
163
00:13:05,993 --> 00:13:08,245
Pete backs away from the car
and is in shock.
164
00:13:08,287 --> 00:13:13,083
The car starts and pulls out
of the parking lot away down the
road.
165
00:13:14,668 --> 00:13:19,215
This is a kind of a collection
of several people's story.
166
00:13:19,340 --> 00:13:23,719
I have a very similar
experience.
167
00:13:24,094 --> 00:13:29,058
It was Christmas, so I was doing
drugs
and drinking in this hotel room.
168
00:13:29,183 --> 00:13:32,812
They pull up and I go to get in
the car
thinking, let's go do Christmas.
169
00:13:32,895 --> 00:13:35,481
And they both get out and shut
the door.
170
00:13:35,523 --> 00:13:39,735
And they have a very similar
conversation with me.
171
00:13:40,569 --> 00:13:45,032
They gave me a present, which
was
like a sweater and said, "Love
you,
172
00:13:45,074 --> 00:13:47,993
but, you know, we're done."
173
00:13:51,205 --> 00:13:53,290
Yeah, I identify with that
story,
174
00:13:53,332 --> 00:13:57,253
you know, I got kicked out of my
parents
house when I was 19 because they
decided
175
00:13:57,378 --> 00:14:01,590
to stop enabling me and after
that I just went
downhill real quick.
176
00:14:01,632 --> 00:14:07,596
I stole probably ten, twelve
thousand dollars from them
and used it on pot and cocaine.
177
00:14:07,638 --> 00:14:08,806
That's what drew me to it, you
know,
178
00:14:08,848 --> 00:14:13,227
because it's easy to listen to
somebody
who's been walked in your shoes
than to listen to somebody
179
00:14:13,269 --> 00:14:14,854
that's trying to tell
you to do something,
180
00:14:14,895 --> 00:14:17,022
that ain't never walked in those
shoes.
181
00:14:17,147 --> 00:14:19,608
What'll really help the movie is
if we have Josh and Cassidy
182
00:14:19,650 --> 00:14:22,528
come and have you all write a
letter
to yourself and fold it up.
183
00:14:22,570 --> 00:14:25,781
I mean, if we can get copies of
photos
of you or you and your families,
184
00:14:25,823 --> 00:14:29,076
we're going to put them all up
on a fence
and make it look like when you
come
185
00:14:29,118 --> 00:14:34,248
into this ministry, they make
you write a letter to yourself.
186
00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:40,337
It was captivating,
it was interesting.
187
00:14:40,462 --> 00:14:45,551
I think it's gonna be, it may
be in the theaters, I don't know
188
00:14:48,554 --> 00:14:53,601
So I talked to Brother John and
I guess I'm gonna
have to sign some kind of
contract saying I won't relapse,
189
00:14:53,642 --> 00:14:55,895
and if I do relapse,
190
00:14:56,020 --> 00:14:57,688
then...
191
00:14:59,815 --> 00:15:02,943
Then I get kicked out of the
ministry.
192
00:15:19,293 --> 00:15:21,211
I'm struggling because I think
193
00:15:21,253 --> 00:15:23,547
I might have a mental illness.
194
00:15:23,589 --> 00:15:26,926
That's why I'm gonna go on
Prozac,
to hopefully help me get through
this.
195
00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:34,558
So today I had to take a piss
test,
one a little more elaborate than
usual.
196
00:15:34,808 --> 00:15:37,227
Why you wigging out, man?
197
00:15:39,104 --> 00:15:40,648
Where's Cassidy?
198
00:15:42,524 --> 00:15:45,027
Good old Cass.
199
00:15:48,822 --> 00:15:49,865
I don't know.
200
00:15:49,865 --> 00:15:55,704
Sometimes it's hard to vocalize
everything,
and my head just feels like a
mesh.
201
00:16:01,168 --> 00:16:03,253
-This is Cass everybody.
-What's up.
202
00:16:03,295 --> 00:16:05,756
-Action!
-We don't know what we're doing.
203
00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:08,842
Dammit, I'm the director this is
what I want!
204
00:16:11,095 --> 00:16:11,804
Lesson learned, kids.
205
00:16:11,845 --> 00:16:14,556
-OK, dude, find the lighter.
-I don't know where it went.
206
00:16:14,598 --> 00:16:18,560
Hey you still got some of that
Dro?
Can I get a 20 sack?
207
00:16:19,979 --> 00:16:21,188
We don't smoke weed.
208
00:17:34,970 --> 00:17:38,640
Feel so uncomfortable right now,
209
00:17:38,682 --> 00:17:42,478
agitated, depressed, stressed
210
00:17:42,519 --> 00:17:45,147
I've been crying some and...
211
00:17:47,649 --> 00:17:51,862
This has gotta stop, man.
I gotta get on with my freakin
life, dude.
212
00:17:52,112 --> 00:17:56,366
Pull it together Cassidy.
Life is not that bad.
213
00:17:56,825 --> 00:18:00,662
Life's not about your
circumstance,
you can be happy no matter what
circumstance,
214
00:18:00,704 --> 00:18:04,833
and the good Lord says that,
God says that I can be happy no
matter my circumstance.
215
00:18:04,875 --> 00:18:08,545
Please, enlighten me.
216
00:18:21,975 --> 00:18:23,727
Tim Burton
217
00:18:25,854 --> 00:18:27,773
See here's another...
218
00:18:27,815 --> 00:18:31,443
a story about socially awkward
kid.
219
00:18:33,612 --> 00:18:34,655
I remember watching Edward
Scissorhands
220
00:18:34,696 --> 00:18:39,910
over and over and over and over
and over
thinking, 'Hey I kind of feel
like that dude.'
221
00:18:41,245 --> 00:18:45,249
What does snow mean?
Cocaine.
222
00:18:45,415 --> 00:18:48,710
This actually premiered
at the Atlanta Film Festival.
223
00:18:48,752 --> 00:18:51,880
Oh, Prozac nation.
224
00:18:51,922 --> 00:18:56,385
"Self-destructive behavior and
paralyzing
depression that reflects an
entire
225
00:18:56,426 --> 00:19:00,764
generation's struggle
to navigate the effects of
divorce."
226
00:19:00,806 --> 00:19:05,769
I've dealt with that.
"Drugs, sex and high
expectations."
227
00:19:05,811 --> 00:19:07,271
Wow.
228
00:19:07,396 --> 00:19:12,317
I need to, I need to watch this
pretty relevant to my life.
229
00:19:12,526 --> 00:19:16,613
After the divorce,
I pretty much lived at a daycare
230
00:19:16,655 --> 00:19:20,951
with my brother and sister,
and the only time that we got
together
231
00:19:20,993 --> 00:19:24,830
with our family was on Friday
nights
we'd have tacos because they
were cheap.
232
00:19:24,872 --> 00:19:28,000
And then a couple of movies
from Blockbuster.
233
00:19:40,971 --> 00:19:43,932
This is a huge pain to do
without help.
234
00:19:43,974 --> 00:19:47,561
This is definitely a two-man
job.
235
00:19:57,112 --> 00:20:00,908
A Better Way Movers has taught
me
to be strong in the Lord.
236
00:20:00,949 --> 00:20:03,911
And to always be willing to help
others.
237
00:20:03,952 --> 00:20:04,536
Cassidy really came up with all
238
00:20:04,578 --> 00:20:09,208
the concepts, and I shot
it and did the lighting.
239
00:20:10,792 --> 00:20:14,546
Having another guy that is into
the same
stuff, you know,
240
00:20:14,588 --> 00:20:17,716
filmmaking and also a recovering
drug
addict,
241
00:20:17,758 --> 00:20:20,636
when you've got another person
sitting
four feet away from you that is
242
00:20:20,677 --> 00:20:24,723
in the same boat, and if I was
struggling,
he'd be the only the first and
sometimes
243
00:20:24,765 --> 00:20:28,477
the only person that knew
that I was struggling.
244
00:20:36,610 --> 00:20:42,908
So it's almost been a week,
still kinda
living out of the car a little
bit
245
00:20:42,950 --> 00:20:49,248
and sleeping on the couch
at my mom's and stepdad's place.
246
00:20:55,462 --> 00:21:02,386
Cass told me that he had
relapsed,
so he was evicted from the
program
247
00:21:02,427 --> 00:21:09,893
and I feel it's a tragedy
because
when he uses I watch him circle
the drain.
248
00:21:09,977 --> 00:21:13,230
You know he's going down
even though he can't see it.
249
00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:16,817
So I like him much better
when he's clean and sober.
250
00:21:18,527 --> 00:21:21,154
Shoot, it's great that Cass is
here.
251
00:21:21,321 --> 00:21:23,865
You know it's cramped, it's
small, but,
252
00:21:23,907 --> 00:21:27,202
you know, it's family,
so whatever it takes.
253
00:21:27,244 --> 00:21:28,829
I'm Cassidy's little sister.
254
00:21:28,870 --> 00:21:30,831
My name's Raven.
255
00:21:32,958 --> 00:21:34,001
Yay.
256
00:21:34,251 --> 00:21:36,920
I haven't really known Cass all
that well
257
00:21:36,962 --> 00:21:42,009
because he's been in and out of
A Better
Way for a very, very long time.
258
00:21:42,134 --> 00:21:43,010
I mean,
259
00:21:43,051 --> 00:21:46,555
I don't know, like when I stop
to think
about it, I'm like, oh my God,
260
00:21:46,596 --> 00:21:49,725
he's been in there for, like,
half his life, it seems, you
know.
261
00:21:50,642 --> 00:21:51,560
When you're a drug addict,
262
00:21:51,601 --> 00:21:57,607
you don't really think about
other people,
so it's up to them to change.
263
00:22:09,119 --> 00:22:09,703
Hello?
264
00:22:09,745 --> 00:22:12,331
Hey, Cassidy, it's Nathan,
how are you doing?
265
00:22:12,456 --> 00:22:14,791
Hey what's up Nathan.
Good, I'm doing good.
266
00:22:14,833 --> 00:22:19,004
You know how I told you we're
going
to have a meeting for the "On
the Fence" short?
267
00:22:19,254 --> 00:22:21,465
-Yeah.
-We feel like you should be a
part of that
268
00:22:21,506 --> 00:22:23,550
because you helped write the
script.
269
00:22:23,842 --> 00:22:26,053
I agree, I think so and
270
00:22:26,094 --> 00:22:28,805
I'm supposed to be the director.
271
00:22:29,014 --> 00:22:31,516
Right but a lot of things have
changed.
272
00:22:31,558 --> 00:22:35,479
You and A Better Way aren't on
like,
workable terms and so...
273
00:22:35,520 --> 00:22:37,647
And if you can't be apart of the
meetings,
274
00:22:37,689 --> 00:22:39,691
then how are you going to direct
the film?
275
00:22:39,733 --> 00:22:43,570
Yeah, no, it's super important
that I'm at those meetings,
276
00:22:43,695 --> 00:22:49,493
no doubt umm, and...
I'm willing to talk to Brother
John to try to work it out.
277
00:22:49,534 --> 00:22:51,370
Alright, call me as soon as
possible.
278
00:22:51,411 --> 00:22:53,080
-Alright man, love you.
-Love you, Cassidy.
279
00:22:53,121 --> 00:22:53,872
-Love you guys.
-Bye.
280
00:22:54,206 --> 00:23:03,423
And I think that's why no one
makes
movies in rehab, because it's
impossible.
281
00:23:03,882 --> 00:23:08,595
I understand that Brother John
has some
hang ups because I relapsed and
he doesn't
282
00:23:08,637 --> 00:23:11,473
wanna put his guys in the
ministry
in that position.
283
00:23:11,515 --> 00:23:16,186
I'm worried that I'm gonna be
the
reason that "On the Fence" falls
apart.
284
00:23:16,228 --> 00:23:18,397
Cassidy was -- I used to sit
right here,
285
00:23:18,438 --> 00:23:23,235
he used to sit right here and
we, we
talked about ideas like this and
we
286
00:23:23,276 --> 00:23:27,823
dreamed about ideas like this
and it wouldn't exist without
him.
287
00:23:27,864 --> 00:23:32,077
So I just I don't want to lose
him in the...
in the shuffle.
288
00:23:36,706 --> 00:23:38,667
-Now it is
-OK.
289
00:23:41,044 --> 00:23:43,213
-Hi.
-Hi.
290
00:23:43,255 --> 00:23:43,755
Nice to see you.
291
00:23:44,214 --> 00:23:50,971
The goal for today is to clean.
I'll have mom point and and I
will clean.
292
00:23:51,304 --> 00:23:53,557
You gotta make sure I'm in the
frame.
293
00:23:53,598 --> 00:23:55,767
-You are.
-OK
294
00:24:00,939 --> 00:24:03,024
That's my mom. Say hi.
295
00:24:03,066 --> 00:24:04,276
Hi.
296
00:24:04,317 --> 00:24:06,278
-How are you doing this morning?
-I'm good.
297
00:24:06,319 --> 00:24:09,114
-I'm not working today.
-Yay.
298
00:24:09,156 --> 00:24:11,199
So we should behave instead like
God's
299
00:24:11,241 --> 00:24:14,786
Very own children adopted into
his
family, calling him father,
300
00:24:14,828 --> 00:24:17,372
dear Father. For his Holy Spirit
speaks
301
00:24:17,414 --> 00:24:21,251
to us deep in our hearts and
tells
us that we are God's children.
302
00:24:21,376 --> 00:24:25,255
And since we are his children,
we will share his treasures.
303
00:24:26,339 --> 00:24:29,134
I relapsed but I did not die.
304
00:24:30,302 --> 00:24:32,053
I believe things are gonna fail.
305
00:24:32,095 --> 00:24:35,515
I don't believe that I will
succeed.
306
00:24:38,101 --> 00:24:42,022
So I gotta change that mindset
and I'm
gonna start believing that I'm
gonna succeed.
307
00:24:42,063 --> 00:24:44,816
Start believing
who I am in Christ again.
308
00:24:55,535 --> 00:24:57,078
Thanks bro.
309
00:25:00,123 --> 00:25:03,710
I sent three applications
out today on the Internet.
310
00:25:03,752 --> 00:25:09,049
One is a driver delivering food
and Starbucks and Taco Bell.
311
00:25:09,090 --> 00:25:13,595
I just need some kind of income
to come in right now
if I'm gonna be able to work on
"On the Fence."
312
00:25:13,887 --> 00:25:14,804
In order not to pay for trash,
313
00:25:14,846 --> 00:25:22,103
we take our trash and dump it in
some
dumpsters at an apartment
complex.
314
00:25:27,692 --> 00:25:30,987
I'm a good person
who has an addiction problem.
315
00:25:31,029 --> 00:25:34,741
We can do this, I can do this.
316
00:25:44,709 --> 00:25:47,462
That's ridiculous,
he looks just like his dad
317
00:25:49,881 --> 00:25:52,842
That looks just like Cassidy,
dude.
Dresses the same and everything.
318
00:25:52,884 --> 00:25:57,556
Just dorky
Cassidy's a dork, I love him.
319
00:25:57,973 --> 00:26:01,643
I used to forge prescriptions
and I'd call this Rite Aid.
320
00:26:01,685 --> 00:26:06,189
I'd call myself
in some Hydrocodone or some
Xanax.
321
00:26:06,439 --> 00:26:09,693
The pharmacists would get on and
I'd say,
"Hello, this is Dr. Kennerly
322
00:26:09,734 --> 00:26:10,694
I have a phone in for a
patient."
323
00:26:10,735 --> 00:26:13,321
And they'd say, "Alright, one
second,"
and you can hear them getting
ready.
324
00:26:13,363 --> 00:26:14,656
Like, "OK, go ahead."
And say, "Ok I've got here,
325
00:26:14,698 --> 00:26:22,914
Hydrocodone acetaminophen, 10
over 325, sig 1 tab, POQ6 PRN
pain, number 40, four-zero, with
zero refills,
326
00:26:22,956 --> 00:26:26,167
generics are approved."
-"OK, great, thanks."
327
00:26:26,209 --> 00:26:27,085
"Thanks, have a great day."
328
00:26:27,127 --> 00:26:28,753
-"Bye."
-"Bye."
329
00:26:29,170 --> 00:26:32,257
So I got away with that for like
eight months.
330
00:26:32,299 --> 00:26:36,469
And then one day, as soon as I
pull out
of the parking lot, I got boxed
in.
331
00:26:44,311 --> 00:26:47,105
I got arrested and charged with
six different felonies.
332
00:26:47,147 --> 00:26:51,568
Somewhere in the neighborhood of
350 fraudulent prescriptions.
333
00:27:02,162 --> 00:27:06,124
So I was taken to Fulton County
Jail
and I spent some time there.
334
00:27:06,166 --> 00:27:12,756
I was given an offer to plea out
to a lesser charge and go to
rehab.
335
00:27:12,797 --> 00:27:16,968
I'm five months from graduating,
but if I leave here prematurely,
336
00:27:17,010 --> 00:27:21,348
or if I'm kicked out, I could
go to prison for 10 years.
337
00:27:38,031 --> 00:27:39,908
-Yooo!
-Yoo!
338
00:27:39,949 --> 00:27:43,662
-You got your own chair.
-This table is epic.
339
00:27:45,246 --> 00:27:47,290
I actually picked up a white
chip yesterday.
340
00:27:47,415 --> 00:27:50,168
This is the first chip you get
when you when you get clean.
341
00:27:50,210 --> 00:27:52,712
So basically, to me,
this is like accountability.
342
00:27:52,754 --> 00:27:56,383
That means that I have to stay
clean now.
343
00:27:56,966 --> 00:27:57,884
I'm Josh
344
00:27:58,051 --> 00:28:03,390
worked in the industry for a
while. First movie I did,
I was an intern on Fireproof.
345
00:28:03,431 --> 00:28:06,643
-And then I worked as a company
grip on Courageous.
-Cool.
346
00:28:06,685 --> 00:28:08,937
And then from there did a lot of
independents.
347
00:28:08,978 --> 00:28:14,150
Was doing that, was married,
and then the drugs just really
kicked my butt.
348
00:28:14,901 --> 00:28:19,364
So Cassidy's not allowed to be
on the property or here in the
office because
349
00:28:19,406 --> 00:28:23,702
of his relapse, so we've asked
for grace,
for special permission from
Brother John
350
00:28:23,743 --> 00:28:26,121
to allow Cassidy to work
on the short film still.
351
00:28:26,162 --> 00:28:30,166
And he's gonna a decision by
hopefully July 4th.
352
00:28:33,128 --> 00:28:35,797
-Hello?
-Yo, you're on speakerphone in a
room of people,
353
00:28:35,839 --> 00:28:39,634
are OK with that?
-Hey, what's up everybody,
hello!
354
00:28:39,676 --> 00:28:40,593
Cassidy!
355
00:28:40,635 --> 00:28:42,512
Give us the spiel, who are you?
356
00:28:42,554 --> 00:28:45,640
I'm Cassidy Detmer,
and I'm a recovering addict
357
00:28:45,682 --> 00:28:49,728
No I'm just joking, I feel
like I'm in another meeting, an
NA meeting.
358
00:28:49,769 --> 00:28:52,147
-Hi Cassidy
-Hey Cassidy
359
00:28:52,188 --> 00:28:55,275
I haven't worked on any big
budget
productions or anything like
that.
360
00:28:55,316 --> 00:28:58,361
But I did go to the Art
Institute for three years.
361
00:28:58,403 --> 00:29:01,865
But before that,
all through my using years,
362
00:29:01,906 --> 00:29:05,368
I would film stuff, just all
kinds
of random stuff all my life.
363
00:29:05,410 --> 00:29:08,830
So I'm always thinking about it,
obsessing about it.
364
00:29:08,872 --> 00:29:10,874
I love film.
365
00:29:11,082 --> 00:29:14,294
Yeah, I mean, that's me in a
nutshell.
366
00:29:14,419 --> 00:29:17,589
"Do you see clearly now this
isn't Peter,
this isn't your son.
367
00:29:17,630 --> 00:29:18,298
It's the drugs speaking.
368
00:29:18,339 --> 00:29:20,925
It'll always be the drugs.
You have to cut him off."
369
00:29:20,967 --> 00:29:23,553
She pulls out a small index
card.
I say take that out.
370
00:29:23,595 --> 00:29:26,639
And if the mom would just go up
to her son
371
00:29:26,681 --> 00:29:31,936
and just lay a hand on his cheek
and look at him in the eye and
say...
372
00:29:40,695 --> 00:29:42,906
They're about to play a video.
373
00:29:42,947 --> 00:29:45,575
Unfortunately, I can't see it.
374
00:29:52,916 --> 00:29:55,919
I got low battery. Shit.
375
00:29:55,960 --> 00:29:57,837
I think they forgot I was here.
376
00:29:58,671 --> 00:30:00,173
I'm gonna take my medicine.
377
00:30:00,298 --> 00:30:02,842
I can't understand what they're
talking about anyways.
378
00:30:11,601 --> 00:30:12,977
I'm hungry.
379
00:30:13,311 --> 00:30:16,648
they're yakking away about
I don't know what.
380
00:31:01,025 --> 00:31:03,611
The situation Cassidy's in right
now,
381
00:31:03,653 --> 00:31:05,697
I'm very worried about where
he's at.
382
00:31:05,822 --> 00:31:09,826
He's a really fragile guy and,
you have a bad enough day,
383
00:31:09,868 --> 00:31:12,537
like right now,
my head hurts so bad and I'm so
stressed that
384
00:31:12,579 --> 00:31:16,040
if I had something
in front of me, I'd do it.
385
00:31:16,165 --> 00:31:18,877
If I wasn't mandated,
I would have left a long time
ago,
386
00:31:18,918 --> 00:31:25,466
just because I know myself. I'm
here because I
have to be and I'm here because
I need to be.
387
00:31:26,426 --> 00:31:30,138
Probably not the best way to
spend your
food stamps card, especially
when
388
00:31:30,179 --> 00:31:32,432
you don't have a job or money.
389
00:31:32,473 --> 00:31:35,518
But I love energy drinks.
390
00:31:35,560 --> 00:31:42,567
And I did though, I did just get
a phone call
from Marco's pizza about a
delivery job.
391
00:31:42,609 --> 00:31:44,402
So I'm super stoked about that.
392
00:31:44,444 --> 00:31:50,033
And I could possibly be
delivering pizzas by Monday.
393
00:31:51,284 --> 00:31:54,412
Oh, man, that's good
394
00:31:54,537 --> 00:32:00,335
energy in a can,
no crash later. Sike, there is a
crash.
395
00:32:00,960 --> 00:32:04,964
And I believe I'm just now
coming
to accept the fact that I might
be
396
00:32:05,006 --> 00:32:09,135
a little manic. And having a
chemical imbalance contributes
397
00:32:09,260 --> 00:32:14,390
to me using drugs
because I don't like the way I
feel.
398
00:32:14,432 --> 00:32:17,852
I have thought of suicide
before.
399
00:32:17,936 --> 00:32:20,146
It's like I just can't handle
feeling this way anymore.
400
00:32:20,188 --> 00:32:23,024
So, you know, either I'm going
to kill myself or I'm gonna get
high.
401
00:32:23,066 --> 00:32:27,445
You know, sometimes it gets to
that point
where it's like there's just
nothing else.
402
00:32:30,490 --> 00:32:32,575
Alright Cassidy.
403
00:32:32,784 --> 00:32:33,534
You can do this.
404
00:32:33,701 --> 00:32:38,331
Thank you, God, for a roof over
my head,
thank you for a car to drive.
405
00:32:38,456 --> 00:32:41,793
Thank you for my dad
putting gas in my car.
406
00:32:43,711 --> 00:32:46,172
You got a lot of good things
going on.
407
00:32:46,297 --> 00:32:50,385
Thank you for the jobs I'm...
I'm going to get.
408
00:32:50,510 --> 00:32:52,720
You're gonna be alright.
409
00:33:03,815 --> 00:33:09,153
He told me that my driving under
the influence thing would be a
problem.
410
00:33:09,195 --> 00:33:14,784
Yeah, that's what I told him, I
said it's been six
years I mean it's like, that's a
long time ago.
411
00:33:36,222 --> 00:33:37,974
I mean, how the hell am I gonna
find a job?
412
00:33:38,016 --> 00:33:40,226
You know, how do felons find
jobs?
413
00:33:40,351 --> 00:33:45,106
And how am I gonna be able to
work on the short film
if I can't even put gas in my
car?
414
00:33:46,983 --> 00:33:50,987
If I get high,
then all my worries will go away
today,
415
00:33:51,029 --> 00:33:54,949
but then they'll just creep back
up tomorrow when I'm not high.
416
00:33:54,991 --> 00:33:59,746
So I decided not to get high
and decided to do this instead.
417
00:34:11,758 --> 00:34:15,636
I love me lens flares.
Just like J.J. Abrams.
418
00:34:24,562 --> 00:34:26,773
Gosh, it sounds beautiful out
here right now.
419
00:34:26,814 --> 00:34:28,691
It sounds like a symphony.
420
00:34:28,816 --> 00:34:30,610
Just listen.
421
00:34:36,449 --> 00:34:39,744
I'm afraid of failing at
something that I love.
422
00:34:39,786 --> 00:34:48,086
To me making films was like
this... Perfect thing.
This most beautiful thing that
was perfection.
423
00:34:48,669 --> 00:34:52,715
And if I touched it,
it was going to fall apart.
424
00:34:52,757 --> 00:34:54,967
So I dared not touch it.
425
00:34:55,009 --> 00:34:58,471
But I've learned that it's...
It's not perfect.
426
00:34:58,513 --> 00:35:01,516
You know, it's just like me.
427
00:35:01,682 --> 00:35:06,437
Its got its imperfections, but
in the imperfections
there's beauty. There's beauty
in...
428
00:35:06,479 --> 00:35:08,189
Frailty,
429
00:35:08,356 --> 00:35:11,192
in just opening yourself up
430
00:35:11,234 --> 00:35:14,028
and not hiding.
431
00:35:18,074 --> 00:35:21,369
So I wanna get this all cut down
pretty low
all the way over to there.
432
00:35:21,410 --> 00:35:23,287
-OK.
-Good luck to you.
433
00:35:23,329 --> 00:35:25,164
-Thank you.
-Yeah.
434
00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:31,754
So he called me up and asked if
there's
any yard work, anything I could
have him
435
00:35:31,796 --> 00:35:34,757
do to try to make a little
bit of money or gas money.
436
00:35:34,882 --> 00:35:37,301
So I told him I could, he can
come over and mow grass.
437
00:35:37,343 --> 00:35:41,055
Who wants to mow grass when
it's 95 degrees, not me.
438
00:35:46,269 --> 00:35:48,521
You allergic to work?
439
00:35:48,563 --> 00:35:49,689
Yeah, I think so.
440
00:35:49,730 --> 00:35:51,816
I might die out here.
441
00:35:53,025 --> 00:35:54,944
Um no we just call him Cass.
442
00:35:54,986 --> 00:35:57,905
That sounds weird calling him
uncle Cass.
443
00:35:57,947 --> 00:36:04,036
It would be fun if we saw
Cassidy's movies on a big
screen.
444
00:36:06,789 --> 00:36:12,587
20 to 25 was probably the
really brutal years.
445
00:36:13,796 --> 00:36:17,049
My lowest time while using drugs
was
446
00:36:17,091 --> 00:36:22,513
when I broke into my dad's
bathroom
and I was trying to steal his
money and he
447
00:36:22,555 --> 00:36:26,350
woke up in the middle
of the night and broke my hand.
448
00:36:26,809 --> 00:36:29,145
Every phone call I got from him
was nothing
449
00:36:29,187 --> 00:36:32,440
but trouble and asking for
things
and things would disappear.
450
00:36:32,481 --> 00:36:34,275
It's actually a part of his life
I try
451
00:36:34,317 --> 00:36:37,570
to forget about
because that's not the true him.
452
00:36:37,612 --> 00:36:42,742
It was...you know the drugs
and it was, it took him over.
453
00:36:51,334 --> 00:36:53,920
-Grandpa said good work.
-Thank you.
454
00:36:53,961 --> 00:36:56,422
Thank you. I love ya.
455
00:37:14,941 --> 00:37:18,236
Going to the movie theater
is like being in heaven.
456
00:37:18,486 --> 00:37:22,198
It's so comfortable for me.
It's just, I get lost in it.
457
00:37:29,538 --> 00:37:32,792
I don't usually keep the number
of days
458
00:37:32,833 --> 00:37:36,754
in my head, because if I do,
it takes forever.
459
00:37:37,171 --> 00:37:41,342
Desperately ready to just move
on with my life.
460
00:37:41,384 --> 00:37:43,469
Have a life again,
have a normal life again.
461
00:37:43,511 --> 00:37:46,264
Have a car, have a job, have a
place.
462
00:37:49,725 --> 00:37:52,687
Yeah, jail sucks.
463
00:37:52,728 --> 00:37:57,984
The biggest selling point this
place has
is that it's not a decade in
prison.
464
00:38:01,195 --> 00:38:03,155
I loved my wife more than
465
00:38:03,197 --> 00:38:08,202
than anything or anyone,
and I lost her because I kept
using.
466
00:38:08,244 --> 00:38:09,287
I kept falling flat on my face.
467
00:38:09,287 --> 00:38:15,209
I kept repeating the vicious
cycle,
and she warned me and warned me
and warned me
468
00:38:15,251 --> 00:38:19,005
that it was gonna end
up with us getting divorced.
469
00:38:19,046 --> 00:38:22,133
I mean, there are bridges
burned.
470
00:38:31,726 --> 00:38:32,685
...ones that I love and from
people I don't
471
00:38:32,685 --> 00:38:38,065
even know and I've hurt so many
different people.
-Right now I am finishing
472
00:38:38,107 --> 00:38:40,985
the graduation video just
in time for the service.
473
00:38:41,027 --> 00:38:46,073
I had to cut my friend Brian out
because he left. Caught with
some drugs.
474
00:38:46,115 --> 00:38:48,117
So he's gone.
475
00:38:48,409 --> 00:38:52,163
Somebody that's that close to
finishing
476
00:38:52,204 --> 00:38:52,872
the program and gets caught up
477
00:38:52,913 --> 00:38:55,666
in that kind of stuff is
just, they're just not ready.
478
00:38:55,708 --> 00:38:56,250
It's nothing against them.
479
00:38:56,292 --> 00:38:59,128
You know, I've done it in other
programs.
480
00:38:59,170 --> 00:39:01,005
I've been there.
481
00:39:01,047 --> 00:39:04,425
For the guy that gets it the
first
time around, great, good on you.
482
00:39:04,467 --> 00:39:06,385
That's my grandpa.
He nailed it the first time.
483
00:39:06,427 --> 00:39:10,389
But it's taken me 13, 14 times.
484
00:39:12,308 --> 00:39:14,226
A Better Way ministry has done a
lot,
485
00:39:14,268 --> 00:39:18,481
it's like a rebirth, you know,
it's a better way, it's a
perfect name.
486
00:39:18,522 --> 00:39:23,194
The day after I overdosed
my dad, he was like 'you need to
go somewhere.'
487
00:39:23,235 --> 00:39:25,196
So now this is just the
beginning.
488
00:39:25,237 --> 00:39:27,448
And don't look behind you,
look forward.
489
00:39:33,788 --> 00:39:36,999
That, men, that's what we are
here for.
490
00:39:37,041 --> 00:39:42,797
That's why you're here and I'm
looking
to see every face at the finish
line.
491
00:39:42,838 --> 00:39:46,592
Hallelujah, Father, we just
thank you,
Lord, tonight for what's been
done.
492
00:39:46,634 --> 00:39:50,346
We thank you for the anointing
that breaks
every shackle and every
addiction.
493
00:39:50,388 --> 00:39:51,305
Bless them tonight.
494
00:39:51,347 --> 00:39:55,935
Establish their steps, may they
be
the hands and the feet of Jesus
Christ.
495
00:39:55,976 --> 00:39:57,937
-Amen.
-Amen.
496
00:39:58,062 --> 00:40:03,109
So ladies and gentlemen I'd like
to
introduce to you, the graduates.
497
00:40:11,033 --> 00:40:13,994
The lights stayed on, it didn't
look good on these monitors.
498
00:40:14,036 --> 00:40:15,746
The audio was terrible.
499
00:40:15,788 --> 00:40:17,331
I have a million things I hate
about it.
500
00:40:17,373 --> 00:40:20,126
And I'm just, I'm not, it's
not something I'm proud of.
501
00:40:20,167 --> 00:40:22,878
I'm just kinda disgusted by it
honestly.
502
00:40:24,338 --> 00:40:26,966
If they don't let me and Cassidy
make "On the Fence,"
503
00:40:27,007 --> 00:40:31,095
I'm not gonna make
it another five months here.
504
00:40:42,022 --> 00:40:45,359
We're getting our props together
for the fence scene.
505
00:40:52,950 --> 00:40:53,951
I'm a drug addict and I lost
custody
506
00:40:53,993 --> 00:40:59,165
of my daughter, and that's the
main reason
why I'm trying to get my life
back
507
00:40:59,206 --> 00:41:03,794
together is so I can be
a part of her life again.
508
00:41:04,044 --> 00:41:07,214
This is when I was in my band.
509
00:41:07,465 --> 00:41:11,719
That's me, heavy metal, that's
my drummer and that was my
guitar player.
510
00:41:11,760 --> 00:41:15,556
That's Jesus hanging on the
cross of course.
511
00:41:15,681 --> 00:41:18,017
This is something I wrote.
512
00:41:20,936 --> 00:41:22,771
Let me start that over.
513
00:41:27,568 --> 00:41:29,695
This is the family vehicle that
I flipped
514
00:41:29,820 --> 00:41:33,157
that ended up with me
coming to A Better Way.
515
00:41:33,199 --> 00:41:38,329
I was high running from the
cops, going
about 115 miles an hour, when
the truck flipped over.
516
00:41:38,370 --> 00:41:45,419
Holding on to all the pain
that's left behind you.
517
00:41:45,461 --> 00:41:46,921
Stay above these lies.
518
00:41:46,962 --> 00:41:48,923
Stay true, walk in the
courthouse.
519
00:41:48,964 --> 00:41:50,925
"Honey, I love you.
Don't do this.
520
00:41:50,966 --> 00:41:54,512
We can make it, our marriage
ain't broken until you break it.
521
00:41:54,553 --> 00:41:55,888
I shouldn't be here.
522
00:41:55,930 --> 00:41:57,264
That's a testimony.
523
00:41:57,306 --> 00:41:59,683
Rip up the papers,
come home, honey."
524
00:42:00,851 --> 00:42:04,855
Will you ever live again?
525
00:42:05,856 --> 00:42:12,571
I'm going to make the best of
doing what
I'm doing, to make them proud
again.
526
00:42:21,622 --> 00:42:23,374
This is my mom and my sister.
527
00:42:23,415 --> 00:42:28,087
I'm going to have a copy made
of it and have it on the fence.
528
00:42:34,677 --> 00:42:38,305
You know, it's my mom, I...
529
00:42:38,347 --> 00:42:40,933
She was the kindest person I've
ever met.
530
00:42:40,975 --> 00:42:46,772
And so, yeah, it was really...
There's a lot of good memories
with Mom
531
00:42:46,855 --> 00:42:48,774
I miss her a lot. It's the...
532
00:42:48,857 --> 00:42:52,987
One of the main reasons I got so
bad
into drugs, is when she died.
533
00:42:53,028 --> 00:42:56,574
So it's..
It's my deepest...
534
00:42:56,615 --> 00:42:59,076
It's my deepest wound, losing
her.
535
00:42:59,368 --> 00:43:01,829
She died very suddenly, you know
she died in the car wreck.
536
00:43:01,870 --> 00:43:06,750
So it was...
I got a phone call one day and
she was gone.
537
00:43:10,588 --> 00:43:13,716
I went on a mission trip with my
church
538
00:43:13,757 --> 00:43:20,472
to Honduras to give food
and clothing to a village, and
539
00:43:21,307 --> 00:43:24,310
we had a bad accident.
540
00:43:25,561 --> 00:43:26,437
So the first day there,
541
00:43:26,437 --> 00:43:33,193
I felt the overwhelming presence
of God
come over me and just happiness.
542
00:43:33,277 --> 00:43:35,487
So it was like one of the best
days
543
00:43:35,529 --> 00:43:39,116
of my life, followed by one
of the worst days of my life.
544
00:43:42,953 --> 00:43:47,333
We were driving through the rain
forest
and we were going down this big
hill,
545
00:43:47,458 --> 00:43:54,548
gears start grinding and I guess
the brakes
went out and the driver had a
choice.
546
00:43:54,590 --> 00:43:59,136
It was like a two hundred foot
drop off
a cliff and we would all
possibly die
547
00:43:59,261 --> 00:44:03,682
or he could bank it into the
trees
to try to slow us down.
548
00:44:12,691 --> 00:44:18,197
And when he flipped it, I landed
about here and bent straight
back.
549
00:44:18,238 --> 00:44:20,532
The two people I was sitting in
between.
550
00:44:20,658 --> 00:44:22,951
Well, they snapped in half
and they both died.
551
00:44:22,993 --> 00:44:28,248
And then they cushioned my fall
and basically saved me from
dying.
552
00:44:28,290 --> 00:44:31,210
I had collarbones broken and I
was a mess,
553
00:44:31,251 --> 00:44:34,797
but when your adrenaline's
kicking,
and I was looking for my
brother.
554
00:44:34,838 --> 00:44:39,927
He was covered in blood and
I thought he was dead.
555
00:44:40,594 --> 00:44:44,807
It took them like eight hours to
find us
because we were in the middle of
nowhere.
556
00:44:44,848 --> 00:44:50,396
The villagers actually made
smoke signals
to flag down the helicopters.
557
00:44:50,604 --> 00:44:52,648
And Cass had...
558
00:44:52,690 --> 00:44:55,609
He had a broken leg, a broken
arm,
a broken clavicle,
559
00:44:55,651 --> 00:44:59,488
and then they started having
problems
with drugs and pain pills and
everything,
560
00:44:59,530 --> 00:45:03,992
and it got to a point to where
Cass
was actually out of control.
561
00:45:09,373 --> 00:45:12,626
So I went back into drugs
and alcohol after that.
562
00:45:12,668 --> 00:45:16,130
Of course, they gave me
painkillers
for being injured and what not.
563
00:45:16,338 --> 00:45:20,134
That made a already bad
problem much worse.
564
00:45:20,259 --> 00:45:25,097
Basically, it was like pouring
gasoline onto a campfire,
565
00:45:25,222 --> 00:45:29,309
which started a forest fire
of drug addiction.
566
00:45:33,772 --> 00:45:37,985
Why would God let a lady
next to me get cut in half?
567
00:45:38,235 --> 00:45:42,030
We're there doing God's work.
568
00:45:43,907 --> 00:45:46,994
I mean, I don't know what
the hell all that means.
569
00:45:59,465 --> 00:46:08,432
...twilight's last gleaming,
whose broad
stripes and bright stars,
570
00:46:08,474 --> 00:46:13,061
through the perilous fight.
571
00:46:14,730 --> 00:46:15,773
I've been nervous all day,
572
00:46:15,814 --> 00:46:20,486
waiting for Jared to call me and
let me
know how his meeting went with
Brother John,
573
00:46:20,527 --> 00:46:23,530
whether or not I'm going
to be a part of the project.
574
00:46:56,522 --> 00:46:58,065
Alright.
575
00:46:59,066 --> 00:47:01,401
Hello, Mr. Jared.
576
00:47:02,361 --> 00:47:06,114
I'm doing good, I'm good.
577
00:47:10,619 --> 00:47:16,667
Sweet, cool, so he's, so he's
cool,
I can work with, I can work with
Josh.
578
00:47:18,669 --> 00:47:20,128
Oh, praise God.
579
00:47:20,170 --> 00:47:22,381
That's great news.
580
00:47:45,070 --> 00:47:47,197
I'm down as the director of
photography.
581
00:47:47,239 --> 00:47:50,117
They're in charge of the entire
look of the project.
582
00:47:50,158 --> 00:47:52,494
Working Director.
583
00:47:52,661 --> 00:47:55,539
I would check these books
but I have to ream them here
584
00:47:55,581 --> 00:48:00,752
because I owe the library three
dollars.
I'm not coming off of it.
585
00:48:01,587 --> 00:48:07,551
My biggest concern is that we
get good
talent and that nobody has a
meltdown
586
00:48:07,593 --> 00:48:12,347
and collapses and ends up
torpedoing this whole project.
587
00:48:15,934 --> 00:48:19,646
To be love for us today means
that we
need to be patient and kind.
588
00:48:19,688 --> 00:48:22,566
We are going to fight for
justice.
We're not going to give up.
589
00:48:22,608 --> 00:48:25,193
We're always going to be hopeful
through every circumstance.
590
00:48:25,235 --> 00:48:29,114
Alright, so in the name of
Jesus,
God guide us to the right
people.
591
00:48:29,156 --> 00:48:30,991
A prayer and a meeting.
592
00:48:36,830 --> 00:48:42,127
-I am auditioning for the mother
role.
-Seth Dowd, I'm auditioning for
Pete.
593
00:48:42,169 --> 00:48:43,337
I'm feeling a little nervous,
594
00:48:43,378 --> 00:48:48,133
this is my first time doing
anything so this is
pretty nerve-wracking but I'm
really excited.
595
00:48:48,258 --> 00:48:51,011
So I'm gonna go in there
and knock them dead.
596
00:48:51,053 --> 00:48:52,846
I'm just hoping for the best.
597
00:48:52,888 --> 00:48:55,807
I'm more hungry, than nervous.
598
00:48:56,183 --> 00:49:02,147
I'm auditioning for Judy today
because
I want to make a difference to
people
599
00:49:02,189 --> 00:49:08,445
who have addictions
because it strikes closely to
home.
600
00:49:11,031 --> 00:49:12,950
-How are you doing?
-Fine how are you guys?
601
00:49:12,991 --> 00:49:14,826
Doing great.
602
00:49:14,868 --> 00:49:17,621
-So my name's Cassidy, I'm
co-directing.
-Nice to meet you.
603
00:49:17,663 --> 00:49:19,373
-What's your name?
-Alexa Rochelle.
604
00:49:19,414 --> 00:49:21,667
Alexa. Lovely to meet you,
Alexa.
605
00:49:21,708 --> 00:49:27,255
And my co-director Jared's over
here,
and Josh will be reading with
you.
606
00:49:27,381 --> 00:49:29,591
-And you're reading for Judy?
-Yes
607
00:49:30,592 --> 00:49:32,386
My brother graduated from there.
608
00:49:32,427 --> 00:49:34,721
Best thing that ever
happened to our family.
609
00:49:34,763 --> 00:49:38,475
What are you running from?
Same thing as everybody else?
610
00:49:38,517 --> 00:49:41,103
-What are you running from?
-What are you running away from?
611
00:49:41,144 --> 00:49:42,604
What are you running from?
612
00:49:42,646 --> 00:49:45,190
Same thing as everyone else?
613
00:49:45,399 --> 00:49:47,484
-Alright.
-So we'll get back with you
614
00:49:47,526 --> 00:49:49,987
early next week and let you
know, but you did a good job.
615
00:49:50,028 --> 00:49:50,487
-Thank you.
-Awesome.
616
00:49:50,529 --> 00:49:53,490
Thank you so much.
Excellent job.
617
00:49:55,575 --> 00:49:57,244
We normally don't allow students
618
00:49:57,285 --> 00:50:01,748
that don't graduate to be
involved in this type of stuff,
but
619
00:50:01,790 --> 00:50:03,834
I love Cassidy and I love his
heart.
620
00:50:04,042 --> 00:50:05,043
When he relapsed, you know,
621
00:50:05,085 --> 00:50:09,506
I got the call and it was like,
oh
my gosh, Cassidy. Really just
broke my heart.
622
00:50:09,548 --> 00:50:13,552
But this maybe will be something
that's
623
00:50:13,593 --> 00:50:17,848
more important to him
than the drugs and pills.
624
00:50:17,889 --> 00:50:18,765
So far it's going really good,
625
00:50:18,765 --> 00:50:22,978
the last guy really killed it,
Seth,
he did a great job playing Pete.
626
00:50:23,061 --> 00:50:28,108
I'm actually surprised we're
getting some
pretty good, pretty good
performances.
627
00:50:28,150 --> 00:50:30,861
Take it back at "You don't
speak."
Let me yell at you.
628
00:50:31,194 --> 00:50:35,240
"You don't speak for her. If my
mother
has something to say to me, she
can say it herself--
629
00:50:35,282 --> 00:50:37,617
--you don't get to call the
shots anymore.
630
00:50:37,743 --> 00:50:39,494
She's put up with enough of your
shit.
631
00:50:39,536 --> 00:50:40,328
We've seen it for years.
632
00:50:40,370 --> 00:50:44,458
-Your last binge almost killed
her.
-Who are you to judge me?
633
00:50:44,583 --> 00:50:46,251
I can get clean at home. Just
give me a ride--
634
00:50:46,293 --> 00:50:49,629
You're not getting it,
ok you're out of control.
635
00:50:49,671 --> 00:50:51,590
You do not have a home with us
anymore.
636
00:50:51,631 --> 00:50:53,050
You don't have a room
at your mother's house.
637
00:50:53,091 --> 00:50:54,676
You don't have a place
to come for Christmas.
638
00:50:54,718 --> 00:50:56,261
We will not celebrate you, give
you
639
00:50:56,303 --> 00:50:59,014
presents, buy you groceries,
bail you out, loan you money,
640
00:50:59,097 --> 00:51:02,851
pretend we don't notice you
using, stealing, nothing.
641
00:51:02,893 --> 00:51:04,186
You've got nowhere else to go.
642
00:51:04,227 --> 00:51:06,146
It's this or serve some real
jail time.
643
00:51:06,188 --> 00:51:10,025
Either way, it won't be with us.
644
00:51:10,233 --> 00:51:11,735
OK scene.
645
00:51:11,902 --> 00:51:13,862
I'm good with that.
646
00:51:15,947 --> 00:51:16,865
I'd much rather cast someone
that we're like
647
00:51:16,907 --> 00:51:22,913
toning down, than building up.
-If they can hit that in that
short time.
648
00:51:22,954 --> 00:51:25,791
Like how he did, you know, when
he
read it, and his inflection
changed,
649
00:51:25,832 --> 00:51:27,918
and it was there.
-I love Seth.
650
00:51:27,959 --> 00:51:30,337
-Which means that Seth and
London are the top two.
-He looked the part too.
651
00:51:30,462 --> 00:51:32,297
-Did he bring it too?
-He was awesome.
652
00:51:32,422 --> 00:51:35,342
He looked it, he delivered.
653
00:51:58,824 --> 00:52:00,283
That's Josh Litton.
654
00:52:01,493 --> 00:52:02,661
Hello?
655
00:52:02,702 --> 00:52:04,246
Hey, uh...
656
00:52:04,538 --> 00:52:06,790
Remember, Canyon?
657
00:52:07,916 --> 00:52:10,544
-Canyon, yeah.
-Yeah, he overdosed
658
00:52:10,585 --> 00:52:15,132
Shut up. Like overdosed as in
like,
is he dead?
659
00:52:15,173 --> 00:52:18,051
No he made it, but he was dead,
I guess,
660
00:52:18,093 --> 00:52:20,971
when the paramedics got
to him, they had to give him
Narcan.
661
00:52:21,012 --> 00:52:21,763
Damn.
662
00:52:21,763 --> 00:52:25,684
Said he was shooting Dilaudid,
and eating fentanyl patches.
663
00:52:26,017 --> 00:52:28,687
I've done that.
I've eaten fentanyl patches
before.
664
00:52:28,728 --> 00:52:30,814
-Yeah me too.
-Yep.
665
00:52:30,856 --> 00:52:33,733
-Oh, my God, well I'm glad he's
alive.
666
00:52:34,359 --> 00:52:38,613
-Alright well thank you for
letting me know, dude.
-Yeah man, I'll talk to you
tomorrow.
667
00:52:46,538 --> 00:52:50,834
Canyon, the guy who worked with
me and
Josh on making commercials.
668
00:53:05,182 --> 00:53:09,686
That could very easily be me,
could very easily be Josh.
669
00:53:24,701 --> 00:53:29,915
If I could talk to myself before
a relapse,
I would say this, too, shall
pass.
670
00:53:29,956 --> 00:53:32,083
Tomorrow will come
671
00:53:32,209 --> 00:53:35,503
and the next day will come,
and next day will come.
672
00:54:23,969 --> 00:54:28,390
Ahhh,
we're going to Pinewood Studios
to see..
673
00:54:28,431 --> 00:54:31,726
I got a job interview
with the cleaning company
674
00:54:31,851 --> 00:54:34,020
at 4:20.
675
00:54:34,187 --> 00:54:36,898
4-20, the magical number.
676
00:54:36,940 --> 00:54:38,066
No, but...
677
00:54:38,108 --> 00:54:44,447
This is where they film really,
you know, Marvel
movies, hundred million dollar
movies, and...
678
00:54:44,739 --> 00:54:47,826
hopefully one day I'll
be working here on set.
679
00:54:47,867 --> 00:54:51,496
But first we'll start
with cleaning the set.
680
00:54:51,621 --> 00:54:53,206
So...
681
00:54:53,957 --> 00:54:55,292
I'm nervous, but I'm OK.
682
00:54:55,417 --> 00:54:57,585
I'm not going to panic.
683
00:55:04,134 --> 00:55:05,802
Well,
684
00:55:05,844 --> 00:55:07,721
that was interesting.
685
00:55:07,762 --> 00:55:12,392
The job is straight up cleaning
toilets,
686
00:55:12,434 --> 00:55:15,061
and urinals. She'll know Friday,
she'll let me know Friday
687
00:55:15,103 --> 00:55:18,523
and hopefully I'll be starting
next Monday after the shoot.
688
00:55:22,152 --> 00:55:24,154
Cassadilla.
689
00:55:26,281 --> 00:55:28,074
-Hello, sir.
-Hello
690
00:55:29,784 --> 00:55:32,120
When I say Canyon's in a
vulnerable spot,
691
00:55:32,162 --> 00:55:37,709
I mean, he is...
About as high-risk as you can
get right now.
692
00:55:40,920 --> 00:55:42,756
-What's up buddy?
693
00:55:44,299 --> 00:55:46,509
-It's good to see you, I missed
you.
-I missed you too.
694
00:55:46,551 --> 00:55:49,012
-I'm glad you're...you OK?
-Yeah.
695
00:55:49,054 --> 00:55:51,890
-Yeah?
-You look good. You look good.
696
00:55:51,931 --> 00:55:54,476
-How ya doing, Canyon?
-Hey what's up brother.
697
00:55:55,977 --> 00:55:59,022
What? That is such a
weird-looking animal.
698
00:55:59,356 --> 00:56:02,984
-It's like touching a nut sack.
-And that rat tail...
699
00:56:03,026 --> 00:56:05,653
-Oh, my God.
-This is my kitty.
700
00:56:06,029 --> 00:56:08,656
-It's like ice running through
your veins.
-Yeah, yeah.
701
00:56:08,698 --> 00:56:09,449
I kept nodding out on the
doctor,
702
00:56:09,449 --> 00:56:12,702
he's like, "we're gonna give
you something to reverse this."
703
00:56:12,744 --> 00:56:16,206
-I'm like, "Alright man."
-Don't do that!
704
00:56:16,581 --> 00:56:20,210
Here you get this huge thing of
just Narcan...
705
00:56:20,251 --> 00:56:22,504
-I'm like...
-Where'd they stick it at?
706
00:56:22,712 --> 00:56:24,964
-Right in my IV.
-Oh, OK.
707
00:56:25,006 --> 00:56:28,301
So it's directly in my blood
stream and
I mean it just shoots you...
708
00:56:28,343 --> 00:56:31,012
You got new tracks and stuff?
Oh, yeah.
709
00:56:31,054 --> 00:56:35,225
I mean it sucks dude, I had...
You're...
710
00:56:37,560 --> 00:56:39,938
You're stuck in it.
711
00:56:40,105 --> 00:56:43,274
I don't know, I regret ever
leaving A Better Way.
712
00:56:43,441 --> 00:56:43,983
I really do.
713
00:56:44,150 --> 00:56:49,531
At the time I thought God
was telling me to leave.
714
00:56:49,572 --> 00:56:50,490
What's the plan like?
715
00:56:50,532 --> 00:56:52,367
What are you
going to do?
716
00:56:52,409 --> 00:56:53,868
For real, for real
no bullshit.
717
00:56:53,910 --> 00:56:57,122
For real for real, no bullshit
um...
718
00:56:57,580 --> 00:57:01,668
I know I can't go back into
the industry anymore
719
00:57:01,709 --> 00:57:05,004
because there's
way too many influences.
720
00:57:05,296 --> 00:57:09,592
I mean, the whole time I
shooting Drop
Dead Diva, I was also shooting
ice.
721
00:57:09,634 --> 00:57:10,677
-Yeah.
-You know?
722
00:57:10,718 --> 00:57:12,512
-Whatever drug you want...
-Ready.
723
00:57:12,554 --> 00:57:15,390
Right like, guy in props
has a pocket full of OxyContin.
724
00:57:15,432 --> 00:57:19,436
Like just go talk to him,
he'll probably give you some for
free.
725
00:57:19,477 --> 00:57:23,356
If you could work in an
environment where
there wasn't drugs and it was in
film?
726
00:57:23,398 --> 00:57:24,065
-I would love it.
-Yeah?
727
00:57:24,107 --> 00:57:28,820
I would love it,
I'd take it hands down, you
know.
728
00:57:34,701 --> 00:57:40,373
I'm most nervous that this
week...
That they're just not going to
put it together.
729
00:57:40,623 --> 00:57:42,959
I care most about them being
healthy
730
00:57:43,001 --> 00:57:45,712
and what does it matter if you
tell a good
story or make a short film,
731
00:57:45,753 --> 00:57:49,257
if someone relapses like
that's not, it's not worth it.
732
00:57:49,382 --> 00:57:52,802
Right now, I'm the most stressed
I've been this whole time.
733
00:57:52,844 --> 00:57:54,929
I'm so goddamn sick of this shit
feeling like
734
00:57:54,971 --> 00:57:59,767
I'm supposed to know all the
answers,
like I'm so, I'm about to snap.
735
00:57:59,809 --> 00:58:00,477
That's the thing that's driving
me nuts,
736
00:58:00,477 --> 00:58:02,979
is that you and I aren't
on the same page with this.
737
00:58:03,062 --> 00:58:04,647
Is it my fault? Do I need to
fix...
738
00:58:04,689 --> 00:58:06,816
No, listen, I'm flipping.
I don't know why.
739
00:58:06,858 --> 00:58:08,651
I don't know why.
I... It's like,
740
00:58:08,693 --> 00:58:10,445
I could cry.
741
00:58:10,945 --> 00:58:14,991
Here you go, picture them
brother and sister,
Seth. And Quinn.
742
00:58:15,033 --> 00:58:17,869
Alexa, hey, this is Cassidy
from "On the Fence."
743
00:58:17,911 --> 00:58:20,121
We liked you the most out of
everybody,
744
00:58:20,163 --> 00:58:25,460
so we wanted to give you the gig
and
was hoping you'd say yes.
745
00:58:26,961 --> 00:58:29,506
Yay!
Look forward to working with
you.
746
00:58:29,547 --> 00:58:31,674
-We got a Judy.
-We got a Judy.
747
00:58:34,886 --> 00:58:38,264
-Hey what's going on Drew?
-You guys still wanna make a
movie?
748
00:58:38,431 --> 00:58:40,600
I think so.
749
00:58:42,393 --> 00:58:46,147
If we were to step on set right
now,
it would be a train wreck.
750
00:58:46,356 --> 00:58:49,025
I think I might have a location
for the fence.
751
00:58:49,067 --> 00:58:51,528
-That could be our road.
-The road kill road?
752
00:58:51,569 --> 00:58:53,154
Yeah.
753
00:59:00,119 --> 00:59:01,996
This is the opening shot of the
movie.
754
00:59:02,038 --> 00:59:07,001
-So I'm thinking, start moving
then you start moving.
-OK.
755
00:59:09,837 --> 00:59:12,257
Look back.
Cut.
756
00:59:12,590 --> 00:59:18,346
Have the camera come and tilt
like this,
you know, and Pete is gonna have
to run this way.
757
00:59:22,517 --> 00:59:25,728
Then it's jam it to the fence,
with me, dirty shoulder.
758
00:59:25,770 --> 00:59:30,567
Do you have that?
OK, and now stay there and now
you get one more like that.
759
00:59:30,608 --> 00:59:33,736
Man this could be a great
ending,
just ending with the trees and
then
760
00:59:33,778 --> 00:59:36,197
putting the title up there,
just kind of like he's looking
up to heaven,
761
00:59:36,239 --> 00:59:39,576
saying, "Hey, God,
I'm going to commit this time."
762
00:59:39,701 --> 00:59:43,162
And then we can get a beautiful
shot
of the sun going through the
trees.
763
00:59:43,204 --> 00:59:46,291
The cool dance between light and
darkness.
764
00:59:46,332 --> 00:59:47,750
Love it.
765
00:59:48,376 --> 00:59:54,716
Our main character, Pete, has a
long road
ahead of him in trying to stay
sober.
766
01:00:04,350 --> 01:00:06,686
There's a scene where we have
all these photos.
767
01:00:06,728 --> 01:00:10,523
So we're supposed to have all
these photos
on the fence and we don't have
enough of those.
768
01:00:10,815 --> 01:00:11,649
You know, some guys come in the
program and
769
01:00:11,649 --> 01:00:15,903
they have tats all over and they
wear
their wounds on the outside.
770
01:00:15,945 --> 01:00:18,531
And you can see they've had a
rough life.
771
01:00:18,656 --> 01:00:22,452
But some guys that come in the
program,
they're clean on the outside.
772
01:00:22,577 --> 01:00:26,372
They look like church kids,
but their wounds are on the
inside.
773
01:00:26,414 --> 01:00:30,793
And those sometimes are the guys
who are the most messed up.
774
01:00:31,294 --> 01:00:33,713
In recovery, it's sort of
refreshing
775
01:00:33,755 --> 01:00:36,090
in a way, because everybody's
messed up already.
776
01:00:36,215 --> 01:00:38,551
It's like an openness, it's
like "yeah, I got this
addiction,
777
01:00:38,593 --> 01:00:42,680
I got this problem."
And people are more accepting of
that.
778
01:00:43,681 --> 01:00:49,395
I feel like there's a community
here
of people that are as messed up
as me or more
779
01:00:49,437 --> 01:00:53,274
and if I'm having a messed up
day or some
of my stuff comes out or
whatever,
780
01:00:53,316 --> 01:00:54,984
they don't care.
781
01:00:55,026 --> 01:00:58,029
They'll look at you like,
"that's all you got today?
Please.
782
01:00:58,071 --> 01:01:00,657
I mean, I've seen worse than
that,
I've been through worse than
that."
783
01:01:00,782 --> 01:01:04,369
So that makes me feel like I
belong.
784
01:01:07,455 --> 01:01:10,291
Pull yourself together, Cassidy.
785
01:01:10,333 --> 01:01:13,127
You're OK.
786
01:01:13,336 --> 01:01:15,088
You're a child of God.
787
01:01:17,006 --> 01:01:19,050
Stop crying.
788
01:01:19,217 --> 01:01:20,927
You're a child of God.
789
01:01:21,177 --> 01:01:23,388
You're a child of God.
You're a child of God.
790
01:01:23,429 --> 01:01:25,640
You're a child of God.
You can do this.
791
01:01:25,682 --> 01:01:28,226
You can do this,
you can do this.
792
01:01:29,560 --> 01:01:31,521
You can do this.
793
01:01:33,606 --> 01:01:37,610
Hello, welcome, guys.
Cassidy, nice to meet you again.
794
01:01:37,735 --> 01:01:38,861
Come on in, guys.
795
01:01:38,903 --> 01:01:41,614
Yeah I'm doing great.
796
01:01:41,656 --> 01:01:43,616
Becky, Mom. Hi Quinn.
797
01:01:43,658 --> 01:01:44,867
-Welcome.
-Alexa.
798
01:01:44,909 --> 01:01:46,536
Seth, you're older brother.
799
01:01:46,744 --> 01:01:49,205
And I know I've read and heard a
lot
of times that
800
01:01:49,247 --> 01:01:52,625
90 percent of good
directing is having good actors,
right?
801
01:01:52,667 --> 01:01:56,421
So at least we got 90 percent,
and I'll just take care of the
other 10 percent.
802
01:01:56,462 --> 01:01:59,257
I myself am an addict in
recovery.
803
01:01:59,298 --> 01:02:03,845
I have...social, like,
really bad social anxiety and
fear,
804
01:02:03,886 --> 01:02:06,848
of big groups of people, which
is nice
because this is nice and
intimate right now
805
01:02:06,889 --> 01:02:08,725
so I love it.
806
01:02:08,891 --> 01:02:09,767
And so I would get high.
807
01:02:09,809 --> 01:02:14,272
That's how it first started off
was to get high just to try to
cope.
808
01:02:14,313 --> 01:02:17,442
And then I have a little sister
and I just...
809
01:02:17,525 --> 01:02:22,697
It would be devastating for her
to tell me, you know, you can't
come home.
810
01:02:23,114 --> 01:02:27,034
When she talks about how her
brother
went to the ministry and
everything like that,
811
01:02:27,201 --> 01:02:30,037
and then she asks you,
"what you running from?"
812
01:02:30,079 --> 01:02:32,165
-Maybe you take a swing of your
beer.
-Mmhmm
813
01:02:32,206 --> 01:02:34,667
Cause you're trying to avoid
the answer to that question.
814
01:02:34,709 --> 01:02:37,837
OK.
Action.
815
01:02:38,171 --> 01:02:40,506
We will not celebrate you,
816
01:02:40,673 --> 01:02:44,427
give you presents,
buy your groceries, bail you
out--
817
01:02:44,469 --> 01:02:46,888
--this isn't how a family is
supposed to treat each other.
818
01:02:46,929 --> 01:02:49,891
Door opens, Mom gets out.
819
01:02:50,725 --> 01:02:52,727
From now on,
820
01:02:52,769 --> 01:02:57,023
my actions will match my love
for you.
821
01:03:00,985 --> 01:03:04,238
We'll be there if you graduate.
822
01:03:07,950 --> 01:03:09,827
I died once.
823
01:03:09,869 --> 01:03:17,627
I was technically dead for
like eight minutes of an
overdose.
824
01:03:17,668 --> 01:03:20,046
Well I got shot and I was dead
for like 10.
825
01:03:20,087 --> 01:03:20,963
You beat me by two minutes.
826
01:03:21,005 --> 01:03:26,052
You've had a glimpse into the
afterlife
two minutes longer than me.
827
01:03:26,803 --> 01:03:30,765
We're going to get this side
fixed up,
see if we can get your smile
back and,
828
01:03:30,807 --> 01:03:33,810
get you ready and looking nice
for graduation, right?
829
01:03:33,935 --> 01:03:36,395
-Yes sir.
-Awesome.
830
01:03:53,913 --> 01:03:57,667
Well, so there you go,
rejected from cleaning,
831
01:03:57,708 --> 01:04:03,130
I cannot even
get a job at Pinewood Studios
cleaning it,
832
01:04:03,256 --> 01:04:06,926
cleaning the toilets. It kind
of makes you feel like you're
less than I mean...
833
01:04:06,968 --> 01:04:09,846
you know, shit.
834
01:04:09,971 --> 01:04:12,807
Fuck. I need something to go
right.
835
01:04:12,849 --> 01:04:17,895
Seemed like everything was gonna
go right,
and then enough, starts falling
apart again.
836
01:04:23,734 --> 01:04:27,238
I really kinda just wanna
have a drink right now.
837
01:04:27,280 --> 01:04:30,616
I just wanna chug right now,
just...
838
01:04:30,658 --> 01:04:34,328
Get hammered and forget
about all this crap.
839
01:04:54,348 --> 01:04:57,894
Hmm, yeah, I mean...
840
01:04:58,227 --> 01:05:02,398
Um, I found out my ex-wife got
remarried.
841
01:05:02,440 --> 01:05:04,650
And...
842
01:05:04,817 --> 01:05:07,194
There's a part of me that didn't
wanna believe it would happen.
843
01:05:07,236 --> 01:05:13,159
Um, she was still using my last
name
for the longest time,
844
01:05:13,200 --> 01:05:14,827
and um...
845
01:05:16,120 --> 01:05:18,873
Then all of a sudden it just
changed.
846
01:05:18,915 --> 01:05:21,542
And there's wedding pictures.
It's done.
847
01:05:21,584 --> 01:05:23,461
It's been done.
But now it's really done.
848
01:05:23,502 --> 01:05:27,715
Now it's, now it's done with no
chance of coming back.
849
01:05:28,507 --> 01:05:29,383
I lose sleep over it,
850
01:05:29,383 --> 01:05:33,679
I dream about her every night,
and it's always some kinda dream
about
851
01:05:33,721 --> 01:05:38,059
me not being able to get to her
like something bad happening and
I can't get to her,
852
01:05:38,100 --> 01:05:39,977
it's torture.
853
01:05:47,944 --> 01:05:51,322
-So you're running, which way
guys?
-Right to the left.
854
01:05:51,364 --> 01:05:52,823
No, no, no. Yeah, which--
855
01:05:52,865 --> 01:05:53,866
alright.
856
01:05:54,075 --> 01:05:54,867
-Where does he go?
857
01:05:54,909 --> 01:05:57,954
He's sitting on the toilet
pulling drugs out of his
backpack.
858
01:05:57,995 --> 01:06:00,873
OK, so we're gonna shoot it this
way.
It's totally cool.
859
01:06:00,915 --> 01:06:05,503
So you want him down,
right? So clear the frame,
please.
860
01:06:05,544 --> 01:06:07,046
Cassidy please clear frame.
861
01:06:07,088 --> 01:06:08,547
Thanks.
862
01:06:08,589 --> 01:06:10,549
Alright, now up.
863
01:06:10,591 --> 01:06:15,221
So regardless if it's here,
he is down using and then he
sits up into frame
864
01:06:15,262 --> 01:06:18,933
and he's unrolling a bill.
-And it would be cool if we
could add a nice wide shot here
865
01:06:18,975 --> 01:06:22,395
of him looking through the
aisle.
-Let me see the list, I don't...
866
01:06:23,604 --> 01:06:26,148
This isn't the time that we...
867
01:06:26,190 --> 01:06:27,024
Jared, help me, help me.
868
01:06:27,024 --> 01:06:30,778
I'm trying to make better sense
of,
like, explain what this is.
869
01:06:30,820 --> 01:06:33,072
This isn't let's figure out our
shots.
870
01:06:33,114 --> 01:06:34,907
This is let's get on pictures of
what
871
01:06:34,949 --> 01:06:37,159
we've already planned
for the last two weeks.
872
01:06:37,201 --> 01:06:39,370
-Yeah.
-Yeah, OK.
873
01:06:39,495 --> 01:06:41,539
Because you're talking, and I'm,
I love you.
874
01:06:41,580 --> 01:06:43,749
I'm just, it's work time,
and I'm not trying to be a dick.
875
01:06:43,791 --> 01:06:45,584
But you're talking about adding
things,
876
01:06:45,626 --> 01:06:49,088
changing things that are huge
on my end that we've put a lot
into.
877
01:06:49,130 --> 01:06:51,173
And because of the issues that
we've had
878
01:06:51,215 --> 01:06:54,468
with you can't be there,
which is not your fault.
879
01:06:54,510 --> 01:06:55,344
-I feel like I'm being a dick,
I'm not trying--
-No, I'm hearing you,
880
01:06:55,344 --> 01:06:58,931
You put a lot of work into this,
this is a lot.
-It's not just me
881
01:06:58,973 --> 01:07:01,267
it's the other people that are
gonna make this happen.
882
01:07:01,308 --> 01:07:03,936
This was the result
of a six hour meeting, that...
883
01:07:03,978 --> 01:07:05,896
you missed.
-So
884
01:07:06,022 --> 01:07:09,817
-So I'm learning it also as we
go
because I didn't know all these
shots.
885
01:07:09,859 --> 01:07:13,738
-Yeah.
-Well we need him to have space
to say this is how I pictured
it.
886
01:07:13,779 --> 01:07:15,531
-Sure.
Because we can change this.
887
01:07:15,573 --> 01:07:17,950
But on the day we can't change
this.
888
01:07:17,992 --> 01:07:21,704
On the day we're shooting this,
and praying to God we get our
coverage.
889
01:07:21,746 --> 01:07:23,831
-OK.
-OK.
890
01:07:24,331 --> 01:07:26,917
Alright.
So what we got first, he's in
the isle.
891
01:07:27,209 --> 01:07:31,005
So face that way like
you're in the aisle, please.
892
01:07:31,047 --> 01:07:35,092
-OK.
-Then over the shoulder of Pete
as the car pulls in, wide shot.
893
01:07:35,134 --> 01:07:37,470
Yep.
894
01:07:37,511 --> 01:07:39,513
I took my last pill an hour ago
895
01:07:39,555 --> 01:07:41,932
for my lunchtime dose,
so I'm all out of meds,
896
01:07:41,974 --> 01:07:45,186
so I've got to go today and get
that
filled so I can have it tomorrow
morning.
897
01:07:45,227 --> 01:07:47,980
-Cool, alright. Love you buddy.
-Love you too, you're doing a
great job.
898
01:07:48,022 --> 01:07:50,733
-Yeah, you are too, thank you.
And I'm sorry I'm not trying...
899
01:07:50,775 --> 01:07:53,110
-You're fine, you're fine.
900
01:07:59,825 --> 01:08:01,202
Well.
901
01:08:03,329 --> 01:08:10,252
I want it to go so well, so bad,
like I want this to be really
great and...
902
01:08:11,170 --> 01:08:12,838
I don't know.
903
01:08:13,005 --> 01:08:15,591
I guess like these days, I'm a
little...
904
01:08:15,633 --> 01:08:19,929
I'm a little more like mad
at Cassidy than I thought I was.
905
01:08:19,970 --> 01:08:20,846
I think, I don't know,
906
01:08:20,846 --> 01:08:25,726
There's a part of me that thinks
like,
"why didn't you stick around?"
907
01:08:25,893 --> 01:08:31,524
I don't know, feels a little...
I feel a little abandoned.
908
01:09:08,310 --> 01:09:11,438
I really experienced God when
I'm outside
in nature.
909
01:09:11,564 --> 01:09:16,152
Takes my mind off of all my
obsessive thinking, negative
thinking,
910
01:09:16,193 --> 01:09:18,904
Oh, Cassidy,
you're just - you're not worth
it, Cassidy,
911
01:09:18,946 --> 01:09:23,033
you're going to fall a part
again, Cassidy,
you're going to relapse again.
912
01:09:31,125 --> 01:09:34,211
I'm gonna call that scene four,
part two.
913
01:09:34,253 --> 01:09:38,215
This is where Pete is
walking back to the rehab
914
01:09:38,340 --> 01:09:39,175
sees some roadkill.
915
01:09:39,216 --> 01:09:44,138
As Pete's walking by the
disfiguredness
of this, this carcass here,
916
01:09:44,180 --> 01:09:48,601
he's looking at, he's looking
at his dead self, the old Pete.
917
01:09:48,642 --> 01:09:49,518
And then, and then when he gets
back
918
01:09:49,518 --> 01:09:55,524
on the campus, he looks up to
the sky
as he's walking, walking back.
919
01:09:55,900 --> 01:09:59,695
He's acknowledging the new Pete.
And um...
920
01:10:00,070 --> 01:10:05,075
That he's, that he's gonna do
things differently now.
921
01:10:20,466 --> 01:10:21,425
I'm a little stressed about
putting a dead
922
01:10:21,425 --> 01:10:27,097
animal in my trunk because it's
so freaking hot,
gonna be nasty, guts everywhere.
923
01:10:27,223 --> 01:10:30,184
I'm just wondering what people
are gonna
think when they're driving by.
924
01:10:30,226 --> 01:10:32,269
What kind of weird rituals
925
01:10:32,311 --> 01:10:36,482
am I doing at home with dead
animals?
926
01:10:36,649 --> 01:10:39,944
It's not, it's not wintertime.
It's not like I'm picking it up
to eat it.
927
01:10:46,492 --> 01:10:49,370
Oh, my God, it looks disgusting.
928
01:10:49,411 --> 01:10:51,163
Come on, man.
929
01:10:52,706 --> 01:10:54,875
Smells like death.
930
01:12:35,351 --> 01:12:38,979
Cool.
Super exciting.
931
01:12:40,606 --> 01:12:43,150
Oh, boy.
Alrighty.
932
01:12:43,192 --> 01:12:46,111
-Hello, hello, hello.
-How are you doing?
933
01:12:46,236 --> 01:12:48,322
-Shaking.
-Don't be, don't be.
934
01:12:48,364 --> 01:12:50,240
-I'm good.
-You're so good, dude. You're so
good.
935
01:12:50,282 --> 01:12:53,452
-I'm so, so, so proud of you.
-I'm proud of you too, dude.
936
01:12:53,494 --> 01:12:55,704
This is the kinda stuff that we
always used to talk about.
937
01:12:55,829 --> 01:12:59,041
-Love you
-Love you too. Super chill.
938
01:12:59,208 --> 01:13:01,919
The writing was like, just spot
on.
939
01:13:01,960 --> 01:13:04,296
You know, it just felt like
whoever wrote
940
01:13:04,338 --> 01:13:07,132
this is connecting to this
character in a real way.
941
01:13:07,174 --> 01:13:10,010
I know this material pretty
well.
942
01:13:10,052 --> 01:13:14,556
My family has suffered
from addiction quite a bit.
943
01:13:14,598 --> 01:13:20,604
And like, my dad actually died
two
months ago and he did heroin for
30 years.
944
01:13:20,646 --> 01:13:24,525
And he was still on heroin
the day he died, you know?
945
01:13:24,650 --> 01:13:29,321
And so my entire family has
been like, affected by this
stuff.
946
01:13:29,696 --> 01:13:32,199
Hey.
Canyon, you made it.
947
01:13:32,241 --> 01:13:33,784
-Party animal.
-Thank you
948
01:13:33,826 --> 01:13:35,035
How are you doing, man?
949
01:13:35,202 --> 01:13:37,204
-You alright, man?
-You doin good, brother?
950
01:13:37,246 --> 01:13:39,832
-Man, I'm doing good, bro,
it's good to see you, man.
951
01:13:39,873 --> 01:13:41,750
You're looking good, bro.
952
01:13:41,875 --> 01:13:46,380
I'm not good in front of a lot
of people.
So that's what makes me nervous.
953
01:13:46,505 --> 01:13:48,799
This is Canyon.
He's going to be helping out
today too, with y'all
954
01:13:48,841 --> 01:13:52,344
so he's just, kinda doing Grip
PA.
955
01:13:54,930 --> 01:13:58,809
-I don't even wanna say the word
rain.
-It's coming dude.
956
01:13:58,976 --> 01:14:01,186
Take it strides at a time.
957
01:14:01,228 --> 01:14:03,647
I get to hang out with this fool
right here.
958
01:14:04,648 --> 01:14:07,943
So life's good, man.
Life's good.
959
01:14:07,985 --> 01:14:11,405
-I love that, that's great.
-So the people we wanted in the
movie are right here.
960
01:14:11,447 --> 01:14:13,782
Everything that needs
to be rain proof right now.
961
01:14:13,824 --> 01:14:15,159
I want to cover everything.
962
01:14:15,200 --> 01:14:17,119
Rain!
Rain cover.
963
01:14:17,161 --> 01:14:19,746
-Just a little bit of stress
that's all.
-That's OK.
964
01:14:19,788 --> 01:14:21,206
-It's OK.
965
01:14:21,248 --> 01:14:24,334
Rain, rain go away
come back a different day.
966
01:14:30,215 --> 01:14:33,927
This rain needs to stop.
I don't know what we're gonna do
if it doesn't stop.
967
01:14:33,969 --> 01:14:37,556
We will be... I don't wanna say
it.
I don't even wanna think it.
968
01:14:37,598 --> 01:14:40,350
-What that we'd have to cancel?
-Yeah I don't even wanna say it.
969
01:14:40,392 --> 01:14:42,102
-How - ohh!
970
01:14:43,395 --> 01:14:44,563
Chief lighting technician.
971
01:14:44,605 --> 01:14:47,483
Anything that involves lights,
that's me.
972
01:14:47,524 --> 01:14:51,069
We can't shoot, obviously,
973
01:14:51,195 --> 01:14:56,241
and all our gear is very
expensive
and it doesn't like water.
974
01:14:58,327 --> 01:15:00,078
-This sucks.
-Really bad.
975
01:15:00,120 --> 01:15:03,040
-It just, it looks so permanent.
-Shit.
976
01:15:03,373 --> 01:15:06,168
Hi.
I'm gonna have to close it a
little bit, OK?
977
01:15:06,210 --> 01:15:07,544
Great, great.
978
01:15:10,756 --> 01:15:12,716
There's somebody in there.
979
01:15:15,969 --> 01:15:18,931
We'll be swimming pretty soon.
980
01:15:19,556 --> 01:15:22,726
I think we're OK maybe
for a bit, then it's supposed to
rain again.
981
01:15:22,768 --> 01:15:23,519
-Really?
-Yeah.
982
01:15:23,560 --> 01:15:26,855
-How bad does it look?
-It's gonna rain all freaking
day.
983
01:15:26,897 --> 01:15:28,148
-Here it is, this is rolling in
right now.
984
01:15:28,190 --> 01:15:31,860
-That's just what we went
through, that little one?
-Yes, that little one is what we
just went through.
985
01:15:31,902 --> 01:15:32,778
-That's coming.
-This is coming.
986
01:15:32,778 --> 01:15:36,198
-Dude, it's like the forecast
completely
changed from this morning.
987
01:15:36,240 --> 01:15:38,075
But I think we're OK.
Maybe for a bit.
988
01:15:38,116 --> 01:15:40,035
OK, picture up.
Picture's up!
989
01:15:40,077 --> 01:15:41,870
Hey Seth,
What's up, brother.
990
01:15:41,912 --> 01:15:43,747
-Good to see you.
-Good to see you too, gimme a
hug.
991
01:15:43,789 --> 01:15:46,333
-Great to see you.
-Great to see you too, stayed
dry?
992
01:15:46,375 --> 01:15:47,084
-Yeah, yeah.
993
01:15:47,125 --> 01:15:50,671
-We got us a window here.
-Yeah, let's do it. I'm excited.
994
01:15:50,712 --> 01:15:55,425
-OK, so the scene
is you running down the fence
post here.
995
01:15:55,467 --> 01:15:58,554
So the idea is jog nice and
slow, and then kinda
996
01:15:58,595 --> 01:16:02,224
we want you to pick up speed as
you go
because you're going to run out
of frame.
997
01:16:02,724 --> 01:16:06,895
-Like here?
-Yeah, the shot is going to be
like this.
998
01:16:07,688 --> 01:16:09,022
Slate up!
999
01:16:09,648 --> 01:16:15,279
-Down a little bit, slate.
-Scene one alpha, take one. Mark
it.
1000
01:16:17,781 --> 01:16:19,199
Action.
1001
01:16:19,241 --> 01:16:21,368
Go ahead Seth, go.
1002
01:16:31,962 --> 01:16:35,507
Yeah, yeah, you're doing great.
Action.
1003
01:16:35,924 --> 01:16:38,427
Yeah, I have no idea when he's
exiting frame.
1004
01:16:38,468 --> 01:16:40,721
That's true, you can't see.
He never, on this one
1005
01:16:40,762 --> 01:16:44,391
he never left frame,
he's like way in the whole time.
1006
01:16:45,934 --> 01:16:49,813
It's going, it's going OK.
It's a little frustrating,
1007
01:16:49,980 --> 01:16:51,898
Blocking is a pain in the butt.
1008
01:16:51,940 --> 01:16:55,068
Just to get everybody queued at
the same time
doing the same thing.
1009
01:16:56,111 --> 01:16:58,280
-Action.
-Go, go. Go, Seth.
1010
01:16:58,322 --> 01:16:59,656
Go, go find him.
1011
01:16:59,698 --> 01:17:01,950
Stop, reset, we're still
speeding!
1012
01:17:01,992 --> 01:17:03,076
How's that top?
1013
01:17:03,118 --> 01:17:03,619
Oh.
1014
01:17:03,619 --> 01:17:05,162
-You alright?
-You good, brother?
1015
01:17:07,748 --> 01:17:10,250
That's what I mean.
It's not, it's not...
1016
01:17:10,417 --> 01:17:11,668
It's just a bad tooth.
1017
01:17:11,710 --> 01:17:12,878
Please just give me a second,
man.
1018
01:17:12,919 --> 01:17:14,463
Please
1019
01:17:14,504 --> 01:17:16,298
-Stop filming--
-Yeah it's bleeding above the
tooth.
1020
01:17:16,340 --> 01:17:17,257
-It's OK though?
-Yeah.
1021
01:17:17,299 --> 01:17:18,508
Copy.
1022
01:17:20,761 --> 01:17:23,597
-Ah son of a--
-Take seven, mark it.
1023
01:17:23,639 --> 01:17:25,932
-Give us some room.
-Clear the road!
1024
01:17:25,974 --> 01:17:27,017
Action.
1025
01:17:27,392 --> 01:17:29,311
Stop stop stop stop stop.
1026
01:17:29,353 --> 01:17:32,439
Cut. We were in reverse
still and we went backwards.
1027
01:17:32,606 --> 01:17:34,566
-You alright?
-Yep.
1028
01:17:34,608 --> 01:17:35,359
Let's, can we take a deep
breath?
Real quick.
1029
01:17:35,359 --> 01:17:38,236
-OK everybody breathe in,
everybody in.
-Want me to cut?
1030
01:17:38,278 --> 01:17:40,822
-No we're still rolling.
Everybody out.
1031
01:17:40,864 --> 01:17:44,993
Cassidy. We're, so we've gotta
get,
we've gotta get, um.
1032
01:17:45,869 --> 01:17:48,372
Camera action and him action
1033
01:17:48,413 --> 01:17:49,289
-we've got to that figured out
-At the same time.
1034
01:17:49,331 --> 01:17:50,082
Because every time he's standing
there looking around
-Yeah that's why--
1035
01:17:50,082 --> 01:17:53,794
--but no one said anything,
that's why.
So we gotta...
1036
01:17:53,835 --> 01:17:54,795
-We gotta get on that.
-OK.
1037
01:17:54,836 --> 01:17:59,758
-Let's figure out the best way
to do that, because we're--
-I'll talk to him.
1038
01:17:59,925 --> 01:18:03,679
This is a great thing for Cass
to be in charge of,
you're in charge of talking to
Drew
1039
01:18:03,720 --> 01:18:07,641
and talking to the actor, and
coordinating
every time when you say action
what is happening.
1040
01:18:07,683 --> 01:18:09,309
And you're in charge of that.
So do it.
1041
01:18:09,351 --> 01:18:10,143
-OK
-You got it.
1042
01:18:10,185 --> 01:18:10,852
Got it.
1043
01:18:10,894 --> 01:18:13,480
We're watching you do it.
Be a director, here we go.
1044
01:18:13,689 --> 01:18:18,026
-We gotta go!
-Actor's action. Action.
1045
01:18:20,362 --> 01:18:24,199
That was a lot smoother.
Can we watch it when they get
back?
1046
01:18:24,449 --> 01:18:27,244
You know, doesn't feel
like it's going to rain again.
1047
01:18:27,285 --> 01:18:32,749
Last time I said that, it
started pouring, so
don't hold me to it.
1048
01:18:32,791 --> 01:18:37,170
This is it. Here we go.
Is this the first shot of our
movie?
1049
01:18:57,357 --> 01:18:58,900
-Was that the one?
-Cutting.
1050
01:18:58,942 --> 01:19:01,027
-Alright I think we're good.
-Check.
1051
01:19:04,072 --> 01:19:05,782
-Rain's starting again.
-Yup, here it comes.
1052
01:19:05,824 --> 01:19:07,033
Bitch!
1053
01:19:07,909 --> 01:19:13,540
Generator's all covered right
now
with a tarp, I mean, it's safe
how it is.
1054
01:19:23,133 --> 01:19:25,510
-I can do this.
-You got this, brother.
1055
01:19:25,552 --> 01:19:28,555
-I have so much faith in you.
It's unreal.
-Thank you.
1056
01:19:28,972 --> 01:19:33,685
This is the key scene that sets
up the, what's going on in this
movie?
1057
01:19:33,727 --> 01:19:37,481
So everybody else has put their
reminders
of why they're trying to get
sober,
1058
01:19:37,522 --> 01:19:40,984
and instead of doing that, he
just
Pete puts his money on the
fence.
1059
01:19:41,026 --> 01:19:43,361
I don't like being on the fence,
man.
That doesn't sound good.
1060
01:19:43,403 --> 01:19:45,572
-That's why, that's the layers,
right?
-Right.
1061
01:19:45,614 --> 01:19:48,200
Do I want to get sober
or do I not wanna get sober?
1062
01:19:48,241 --> 01:19:51,870
Definitely want to.
1063
01:19:52,037 --> 01:19:54,790
It's crazy how you like
rationalize like, OK
1064
01:19:54,831 --> 01:19:59,252
you know, I'm never doing this
again, but this?
Then you slip.
1065
01:19:59,294 --> 01:20:02,214
I don't wanna,
I don't wanna be high anymore,
dude.
1066
01:20:02,380 --> 01:20:06,051
I really don't.
I'm not happy when I'm high.
1067
01:20:06,092 --> 01:20:10,013
-Camera speed.
-And action.
1068
01:20:12,224 --> 01:20:16,436
Keep rolling, stop, stop,
freeze, ready?
Keep rolling.
1069
01:20:16,603 --> 01:20:19,731
-What's the next line?
-Never thought my life would
come to this.
1070
01:20:19,773 --> 01:20:20,899
Cut!
1071
01:20:20,941 --> 01:20:22,400
Alright, armadillo.
1072
01:20:26,947 --> 01:20:28,615
We're in trouble.
1073
01:20:28,782 --> 01:20:30,826
We're in trouble. If this
doesn't stop--
1074
01:20:30,867 --> 01:20:34,037
-Everybody find cover.
-Everybody cover!
1075
01:20:34,246 --> 01:20:37,791
We don't have enough money to
cancel the day
1076
01:20:37,833 --> 01:20:40,168
and say, "oh, we'll get it next
weekend," like that doesn't
exist.
1077
01:20:40,210 --> 01:20:42,087
-We have two days and that's it.
-Alright.
1078
01:20:42,128 --> 01:20:43,713
Let's not, let's not even think
there yet.
1079
01:20:43,755 --> 01:20:46,049
Let's not even get, let's
not get to tomorrow yet.
1080
01:20:46,091 --> 01:20:48,468
Let's, let's live in the moment.
Let's be here.
1081
01:20:51,096 --> 01:20:56,142
Now we're about to do some
rotten
armadillo, so hopefully my lunch
doesn't come up.
1082
01:20:56,560 --> 01:20:59,020
Double bagged it,
I like that, I like that.
1083
01:20:59,062 --> 01:21:00,856
Oh my God, there it is.
1084
01:21:00,939 --> 01:21:02,816
Oh, it's so ripe.
1085
01:21:03,984 --> 01:21:06,903
Look at it.
Oh my gosh it's so gross.
1086
01:21:06,945 --> 01:21:09,197
Oh, my God.
1087
01:21:11,283 --> 01:21:13,743
-Spot that light in just a tiny
bit.
-There we go!
1088
01:21:13,785 --> 01:21:18,206
-Now pan with him if you will.
-And action.
1089
01:21:20,750 --> 01:21:23,169
-This is my mom and sister.
1090
01:21:23,211 --> 01:21:24,671
-You're good
-Hey!
1091
01:21:24,713 --> 01:21:26,631
They came out to see me.
1092
01:21:28,592 --> 01:21:31,845
Do you think making movies
will keep him out of drugs?
1093
01:21:33,972 --> 01:21:35,432
Honestly?
1094
01:21:35,473 --> 01:21:36,725
Probably not.
1095
01:21:37,225 --> 01:21:40,520
I wouldn't think so.
I mean, no.
1096
01:21:40,562 --> 01:21:42,022
I wouldn't...
1097
01:21:42,355 --> 01:21:43,440
Because other things have
happened to him
1098
01:21:43,481 --> 01:21:47,903
that you would think would help
him
stay outta drugs and it never
has, I don't see...
1099
01:21:47,944 --> 01:21:48,403
I don't think...
1100
01:21:48,570 --> 01:21:52,115
No, I think he has a sabotage
thing going.
1101
01:21:52,157 --> 01:21:54,492
He'll ruin it for himself.
1102
01:21:54,534 --> 01:21:56,536
I would hope he wouldn't, but...
1103
01:21:56,578 --> 01:21:58,663
It's Cass.
1104
01:22:27,484 --> 01:22:28,526
Yesterday we didn't ruin a movie
1105
01:22:28,568 --> 01:22:33,531
but we didn't make a great movie
yet.
Today we either make a great
movie or we don't.
1106
01:22:33,990 --> 01:22:38,995
Having to tell someone like a
family
member off and like cutting them
out,
1107
01:22:39,037 --> 01:22:41,831
I've unfortunately kind of had
to do that quite recently.
1108
01:22:41,873 --> 01:22:45,377
So I do connect with the
character in that way.
1109
01:22:49,047 --> 01:22:51,466
I'm more nervous today than I
was yesterday.
1110
01:22:51,508 --> 01:22:53,927
I feel like I'm gonna puke at
any time.
1111
01:22:53,969 --> 01:22:55,387
I mean, I don't blame him.
1112
01:22:55,428 --> 01:22:58,014
It has a lot of stress, but...
1113
01:22:58,098 --> 01:23:02,227
That's what he's gotta do, you
know,
he is the director of this bad
boy, so
1114
01:23:02,268 --> 01:23:05,939
he's gonna have to just jam it
out
and roll with the punches.
1115
01:23:10,527 --> 01:23:13,321
Ok here we go, we're quiet on
set!
1116
01:23:14,406 --> 01:23:16,574
And action!
1117
01:23:16,700 --> 01:23:19,619
So what are you doing in town?
1118
01:23:19,661 --> 01:23:23,790
Just on my way out actually.
Just meeting family.
1119
01:23:24,499 --> 01:23:26,251
You lie often?
1120
01:23:27,043 --> 01:23:32,674
-How so?
-Dropouts from the recovery
center come here all the time.
1121
01:23:32,716 --> 01:23:35,260
Cut!
Be looking around more for like
1122
01:23:35,301 --> 01:23:38,054
you're waiting for the wait,
wait.
1123
01:23:38,096 --> 01:23:40,390
You guys are great, I'm loving
it.
1124
01:23:40,432 --> 01:23:42,267
Good job, everybody!
1125
01:23:42,308 --> 01:23:44,394
-OK, so we're gonna go to a
medium shot--
-Then a medium.
1126
01:23:44,436 --> 01:23:47,313
-Then a medium on her then--
-A medium two shot, right?
1127
01:23:47,355 --> 01:23:49,149
-Yeah, yeah.
Dirty frame medium, yeah.
1128
01:23:49,190 --> 01:23:51,026
And action!
1129
01:23:53,695 --> 01:23:58,366
I love the atmosphere right now,
you know, everyone's in high
spirits.
1130
01:23:58,408 --> 01:23:59,492
He's staying sober he's working
through
1131
01:23:59,534 --> 01:24:04,748
his problems and you can see it
in real life like he's not who
he used to be, you know, and
1132
01:24:04,789 --> 01:24:07,500
for people to say,
oh yeah, "once and addict,
always an addict."
1133
01:24:07,542 --> 01:24:11,254
That's crap.
Because I see so much in
Cassidy.
1134
01:24:11,296 --> 01:24:13,715
It's about the best thing that
ever happened to our family.
1135
01:24:13,757 --> 01:24:14,716
Placing the beer can down,
1136
01:24:14,758 --> 01:24:19,179
be a little bit more like, oh,
you know,
yeah, you don't wanna get
caught!
1137
01:24:19,220 --> 01:24:22,265
Know what I mean, your mom's
pulling up
you're trying to go back home
from rehab
1138
01:24:22,307 --> 01:24:24,642
and gotta beer in your hand.
1139
01:24:28,313 --> 01:24:30,148
Hold for sound!
1140
01:24:34,736 --> 01:24:36,613
Still holding.
1141
01:24:37,155 --> 01:24:41,284
-This is my new mom for the day.
-Yes, we're taking selfies
1142
01:24:41,326 --> 01:24:42,869
Follow us on Facebook.
1143
01:24:43,411 --> 01:24:44,329
Oh, I think he's doing way
better today.
1144
01:24:44,370 --> 01:24:49,250
Probably feels more comfortable,
but you know hey,
it was his first time.
1145
01:24:49,292 --> 01:24:51,628
Yeah first day jitters.
1146
01:24:58,259 --> 01:24:59,928
We're behind schedule.
1147
01:25:03,181 --> 01:25:05,642
OK we ready?
Speed it!
1148
01:25:05,683 --> 01:25:06,976
OK here we go.
1149
01:25:07,018 --> 01:25:08,228
Scene four kilo, take two
1150
01:25:10,105 --> 01:25:12,148
And action.
1151
01:25:29,249 --> 01:25:31,918
He's gonna lay out a line
on that toilet paper thing,
right?
1152
01:25:31,960 --> 01:25:35,171
You wanna do a line?
Is this supposed to be heroin?
1153
01:25:35,213 --> 01:25:37,465
-A line of heroin?
-Yeah forsure
1154
01:25:37,507 --> 01:25:40,426
-I would, I would just do
it in the palm of my hand, like.
1155
01:25:40,468 --> 01:25:43,847
-Wait what?
-Confession time, guys. I have
19 years sober.
1156
01:25:43,888 --> 01:25:45,473
-Oh, wait really?
-Yeah.
1157
01:25:45,515 --> 01:25:46,015
-Yeah!
1158
01:25:46,057 --> 01:25:48,268
-So if I were going to do that,
-Yeah.
1159
01:25:48,309 --> 01:25:51,563
-It would just be in the web of
my finger.
-OK here we go.
1160
01:25:51,604 --> 01:25:54,107
-Camera speed.
-Three take one, marker.
1161
01:25:56,568 --> 01:25:59,070
-Take two.
-Action.
1162
01:26:08,621 --> 01:26:10,748
We're just trying to get this
shot figured out.
1163
01:26:10,790 --> 01:26:13,710
The sun will be behind
those trees in no time, so...
1164
01:26:13,751 --> 01:26:17,172
Like, we don't have till
sundown,
we have till sun hits those
trees.
1165
01:26:17,213 --> 01:26:21,885
We're about to do probably like
the
biggest scene and the sun's
going down, so...
1166
01:26:22,051 --> 01:26:24,679
I don't know how you do
that without lighting, but it's
fine
1167
01:26:24,721 --> 01:26:26,139
we'll figure something out.
1168
01:26:26,181 --> 01:26:28,266
Scene six bravo, take one.
1169
01:26:28,933 --> 01:26:34,147
A good majority of the people
that are drug
users, they have a lot of mental
illness,
1170
01:26:34,189 --> 01:26:37,483
so it's not a fact of, they just
wanna go take a pill to get
high.
1171
01:26:37,525 --> 01:26:41,196
No, they're taking a pill
because
they've got anxiety or they're
sad all
1172
01:26:41,237 --> 01:26:44,949
the time or they just don't feel
like
feeling like they feel every
day.
1173
01:26:44,991 --> 01:26:49,829
Trying to find whatever you can
to make yourself
feel normal like everybody else.
1174
01:26:50,038 --> 01:26:53,166
Who are you to judge me?
1175
01:26:55,710 --> 01:26:57,086
I can get clean at home.
Just give me--
1176
01:26:57,128 --> 01:26:59,130
--You don't get it.
1177
01:26:59,964 --> 01:27:02,175
You're out of control.
1178
01:27:02,467 --> 01:27:04,844
Mom, do you see it?
1179
01:27:04,886 --> 01:27:07,931
Do you see it clearly now?
This isn't Peter.
1180
01:27:07,972 --> 01:27:09,766
It's the drugs speaking.
1181
01:27:10,141 --> 01:27:14,479
It's always going to be the
drugs.
1182
01:27:15,396 --> 01:27:17,565
-Cut
-So good.
1183
01:27:17,941 --> 01:27:18,983
So good.
1184
01:27:19,484 --> 01:27:22,070
Like you're whispering it.
"Do you love me?
1185
01:27:22,111 --> 01:27:24,822
Do your actions say you love
me?"
1186
01:27:24,948 --> 01:27:29,035
Feeling anxious right now.
We're definitely running out of
day.
1187
01:27:34,040 --> 01:27:36,542
That's dark,
and that should be blue sky.
1188
01:27:36,584 --> 01:27:40,588
I mean, this is like we're
shooting back
into what should be daylight,
and it's dark.
1189
01:27:40,922 --> 01:27:47,095
It's like clear skies all around
us,
a few miles each way, and then
just a
1190
01:27:47,220 --> 01:27:53,017
dark gray sky on top of us,
so it might be about to pour.
1191
01:28:00,191 --> 01:28:02,151
I got it are you rolling?
1192
01:28:02,277 --> 01:28:03,945
Action!
1193
01:28:04,404 --> 01:28:07,532
-I just need her arms to be
wiped.
-Yeah. Wipe her arms!
1194
01:28:07,573 --> 01:28:12,704
You're just gonna step into the
hug.
Like all the way, just walk all
the way to his belly.
1195
01:28:12,745 --> 01:28:14,664
-Still speeding!
-Watch your shadow!
1196
01:28:14,706 --> 01:28:15,915
Here we go!
1197
01:28:16,165 --> 01:28:17,834
We don't have it?
1198
01:28:19,043 --> 01:28:20,378
Go, just try one!
1199
01:28:20,420 --> 01:28:23,589
Ready and move to the hug.
Go Becky.
1200
01:28:23,631 --> 01:28:25,925
OK good, cut cut cut get out!
Get out!
1201
01:28:25,967 --> 01:28:28,511
-Save the light!
-Keep the cover on the camera!
1202
01:28:28,761 --> 01:28:30,596
You got an umbrella,
got an umbrella!
1203
01:28:32,098 --> 01:28:33,433
What else goes, lights?
1204
01:28:38,021 --> 01:28:40,606
That's not good, we just lost
Judy coming out
with the donuts.
1205
01:28:40,648 --> 01:28:43,443
The headache in that moment.
1206
01:28:47,030 --> 01:28:49,449
Well, that's it.
1207
01:28:49,490 --> 01:28:51,784
We'll see if we can make it
work.
1208
01:28:59,917 --> 01:29:07,633
I'm just holding on.
I keep holding on.
1209
01:29:07,675 --> 01:29:15,641
I'm just holding on.
Holding on, and I won't let go
my faith.
1210
01:29:38,456 --> 01:29:42,919
Father God, we lift these men up
to you tonight,
father, we ask that you would
continue to guide them.
1211
01:29:43,044 --> 01:29:44,921
Father, thank you so much
1212
01:29:44,962 --> 01:29:48,674
for these precious souls
that you have redeemed tonight.
1213
01:29:48,716 --> 01:29:51,677
Cover them, oh God I pray.
Use them, oh God I pray.
1214
01:29:51,719 --> 01:29:56,641
Position them, oh God I pray.
Bless them, oh God, I pray
tonight.
1215
01:29:56,682 --> 01:29:59,519
-In Jesus name, Amen.
-Amen.
1216
01:30:30,925 --> 01:30:35,805
My brother hooked me up with
this job,
and I'm an electrician, a low
voltage
1217
01:30:35,847 --> 01:30:40,143
electrician, which is something
I never thought I would do.
1218
01:30:42,520 --> 01:30:44,897
What do I think God is like?
1219
01:30:48,234 --> 01:30:55,158
God is like a new person in
recovery
who has the light turned on for
the first time
1220
01:30:55,199 --> 01:30:59,787
and realizes that
they're not a piece of shit,
1221
01:31:00,204 --> 01:31:03,833
you know, that people love them.
1222
01:32:12,360 --> 01:32:16,656
Gotta deal with this, it's
awesome.
This is the start of dreams
right here.
1223
01:32:24,997 --> 01:32:27,583
Welcome to first night at the
Atlanta Film Festival
1224
01:32:27,625 --> 01:32:30,836
locals-only short film block.
1225
01:33:03,786 --> 01:33:06,872
There's a part of me that would
like to just
crawl in a hole and hide
1226
01:33:06,914 --> 01:33:10,001
because there's a part of,
because basically,
1227
01:33:10,876 --> 01:33:13,546
I'm basically...I don't know...
1228
01:34:22,073 --> 01:34:23,491
Peter.
1229
01:34:24,116 --> 01:34:25,743
Do you love me?
1230
01:34:25,868 --> 01:34:29,622
Do your actions say that you
love me?
1231
01:34:29,747 --> 01:34:35,086
From now on, my actions
will match my love for you.
1232
01:34:35,127 --> 01:34:38,756
If you graduate,
I'll be there to watch.
100261
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