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1
00:00:48,549 --> 00:00:53,654
Into love and out again,
2
00:00:53,687 --> 00:00:57,057
Thus i went,
and thus i go.
3
00:01:01,061 --> 00:01:04,332
Spare your voice,
and hold your pen...
4
00:01:04,365 --> 00:01:07,335
Well and bitterly
i know
5
00:01:07,368 --> 00:01:11,038
All the songs
were ever sung,
6
00:01:11,071 --> 00:01:13,974
All the words
were ever said...
7
00:01:14,007 --> 00:01:17,044
Could it be,
when i was young,
8
00:01:17,077 --> 00:01:20,080
Some one dropped me
on my head?
9
00:01:37,398 --> 00:01:40,434
Oh, i'm rather glad
that you caught me like this
10
00:01:40,468 --> 00:01:42,936
Because it gives me
an opportunity
11
00:01:42,970 --> 00:01:45,373
To give you a little talk
12
00:01:45,406 --> 00:01:47,641
On the art of making
motion pictures
13
00:01:47,675 --> 00:01:49,877
In your own home.
14
00:01:49,910 --> 00:01:53,614
Of course, you all know
that you can...
15
00:01:57,117 --> 00:02:00,488
...that you can make
motion pictures
16
00:02:00,521 --> 00:02:01,389
In your own home.
17
00:02:01,422 --> 00:02:06,026
All you need to have
is a home
18
00:02:06,059 --> 00:02:12,099
And a small camera
like this...somewhere.
19
00:02:12,132 --> 00:02:15,603
And quite a lot of film,
as you see.
20
00:02:15,636 --> 00:02:17,371
Oh, well.
Never mind.
21
00:02:17,405 --> 00:02:18,839
With these essentials,
22
00:02:18,872 --> 00:02:21,642
You can take pictures
of any interesting events
23
00:02:21,675 --> 00:02:24,044
That may happen
in your own household,
24
00:02:24,077 --> 00:02:25,946
If any interesting events
ever do happen
25
00:02:25,979 --> 00:02:28,115
In your own household.
26
00:02:28,148 --> 00:02:30,918
And you can make
a record of all trips
27
00:02:30,951 --> 00:02:32,620
And of the progress
of the children
28
00:02:32,653 --> 00:02:34,988
Down the path of life.
29
00:02:35,022 --> 00:02:37,258
And you can also
entertain your friends
30
00:02:37,291 --> 00:02:38,826
Into the bargain.
31
00:02:38,859 --> 00:02:42,196
The other night, we had a party
of friends in for dinner.
32
00:02:42,230 --> 00:02:45,199
After dinner, instead of
going out on the town,
33
00:02:45,233 --> 00:02:46,767
As they say,
34
00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:50,003
Or settling down
for a dull game of bridge...
35
00:02:50,037 --> 00:02:51,272
Cut!
36
00:02:51,305 --> 00:02:53,173
Wonderful.
The rest of this is voice-Over.
37
00:02:54,475 --> 00:02:56,444
Thank you, everyone!
An early lunch today!
38
00:02:56,477 --> 00:02:59,146
Let's be back
in one hour, please.
39
00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:01,449
Try to be back
in one hour.
40
00:03:01,482 --> 00:03:04,452
Bob,
we'll be in the living room after lunch.
41
00:03:04,485 --> 00:03:06,086
How are you
feeling, bob?
42
00:03:06,119 --> 00:03:07,921
I'm fine.
Just hurting inside.
43
00:03:07,955 --> 00:03:10,190
The top one's
a corker.
44
00:03:14,495 --> 00:03:17,197
Look at that.
The higher authority.
45
00:03:26,206 --> 00:03:27,508
If it comes through,
46
00:03:27,541 --> 00:03:29,109
It'll be the first ever
nomination
47
00:03:29,142 --> 00:03:30,678
For a husband-And-Wife
team.
48
00:03:30,711 --> 00:03:32,380
We could be the first
husband-And-Wife team
49
00:03:32,413 --> 00:03:34,081
Ever nominated
for an oscar.
50
00:03:34,114 --> 00:03:36,484
Shit.
Now i'll have to see the picture.
51
00:03:36,517 --> 00:03:40,521
Mr. Selznick should know
by this afternoon.
52
00:03:40,554 --> 00:03:42,290
Bob!
53
00:03:42,323 --> 00:03:43,924
Alan,
how are you?
54
00:03:43,957 --> 00:03:45,959
It's good
to see you.
55
00:03:45,993 --> 00:03:46,960
Oh, mrs. Parker.
56
00:03:46,994 --> 00:03:48,662
Mr. Benchley.
57
00:03:50,898 --> 00:03:52,266
Oh, bob,
you look terrific.
58
00:03:52,300 --> 00:03:53,667
When i dress up,
59
00:03:53,701 --> 00:03:56,537
I still manage to look
like a house detective.
60
00:03:56,570 --> 00:03:58,038
It's the tie.
61
00:03:58,071 --> 00:04:00,341
Listen, you must come up
to roxbury drive.
62
00:04:00,374 --> 00:04:02,209
I'll whip up some tomato curry
with spring lamb.
63
00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:03,277
That will be fine.
64
00:04:03,311 --> 00:04:06,880
Alan enjoys whipping
young lambs.
65
00:04:06,914 --> 00:04:08,048
Darling.
66
00:04:08,081 --> 00:04:09,750
Well, great
to see you, bob.
67
00:04:09,783 --> 00:04:11,885
Darling, i'll prepare them
for our scene.
68
00:04:11,919 --> 00:04:14,254
We did a little fix
for goldwyn.
69
00:04:14,288 --> 00:04:16,023
He told us people want
a happy ending.
70
00:04:16,056 --> 00:04:18,025
Dorothy reminded him
that in all history,
71
00:04:18,058 --> 00:04:20,628
No single person
ever had such a thing.
72
00:04:20,661 --> 00:04:25,433
Goldwyn doesn't know
what she's talking about.
73
00:04:26,734 --> 00:04:29,470
You must tell me
the moment you know.
74
00:04:29,503 --> 00:04:33,240
He can be such
a fawn's ass.
75
00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:37,378
Well, mrs. Parker,
goldwyn.
76
00:04:37,411 --> 00:04:38,512
Mr. Benchley,
out here,
77
00:04:38,546 --> 00:04:41,415
The streets are
paved with goldwyn.
78
00:04:41,449 --> 00:04:44,051
Careful, man.
Stepped in something.
79
00:04:44,084 --> 00:04:48,589
Little art going by.
80
00:04:48,622 --> 00:04:49,823
I'm seeing
don stewart tonight.
81
00:04:49,857 --> 00:04:51,792
We're going to go out
for a hot-Fudge gin.
82
00:04:51,825 --> 00:04:52,793
Donny needs a break
83
00:04:52,826 --> 00:04:55,429
From his leagues
and guilds and soviets.
84
00:04:55,463 --> 00:04:57,931
Union is a five-Letter word,
mr. Benchley.
85
00:04:57,965 --> 00:04:59,933
What do you know
about that?
86
00:04:59,967 --> 00:05:01,134
And i expect
to see you
87
00:05:01,168 --> 00:05:03,437
At the writers'
fund raiser.
88
00:05:03,471 --> 00:05:05,539
Oh, you sent me
that little card.
89
00:05:05,573 --> 00:05:06,340
I couldn't make it out
with the red ink.
90
00:05:06,374 --> 00:05:07,408
On the first.
91
00:05:07,441 --> 00:05:09,643
I promised gertrude
and the boys
92
00:05:09,677 --> 00:05:11,945
I'd launch the big benchley
expedition that weekend.
93
00:05:11,979 --> 00:05:13,013
These are not the days
94
00:05:13,046 --> 00:05:14,982
For timid,
selfish little things.
95
00:05:15,015 --> 00:05:17,050
Mrs. Parker,
it's no small affair,
96
00:05:17,084 --> 00:05:18,486
Getting all those people...
97
00:05:18,519 --> 00:05:22,189
Years i've wasted being a
party girl and smartass.
98
00:05:22,222 --> 00:05:25,025
You were a pretty smart
party gi...
99
00:05:25,058 --> 00:05:26,627
Ass.
100
00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:28,629
Ready for you
on the set.
101
00:05:28,662 --> 00:05:30,631
Bit of a party girl
myself.
102
00:05:30,664 --> 00:05:32,633
Visiting hours
are over, mr. Benchley.
103
00:05:32,666 --> 00:05:35,302
Let's do it again
sometime soon, mrs. Parker.
104
00:05:35,335 --> 00:05:38,472
You'll find us
next-Door to caligula.
105
00:05:38,506 --> 00:05:40,340
Oh, does that hurt?
106
00:05:40,374 --> 00:05:43,411
Must have been so colorful
in the twenties.
107
00:05:43,444 --> 00:05:46,514
Was it?
I barely remember.
108
00:05:56,356 --> 00:05:58,492
So many famous writers
109
00:05:58,526 --> 00:06:01,495
Are from the algonquin roundtable,
mrs. Parker.
110
00:06:01,529 --> 00:06:03,497
Ah, but no
real giants.
111
00:06:03,531 --> 00:06:05,433
Just a bunch of
loudmouths showing off,
112
00:06:05,466 --> 00:06:07,735
Writing it up in their
columns the next day.
113
00:06:07,768 --> 00:06:11,371
It's no mermaid tavern,
i promise you that.
114
00:06:11,405 --> 00:06:13,441
Will you get me
a cup of coffee, dear?
115
00:06:13,474 --> 00:06:14,575
They love it,
darling.
116
00:06:14,608 --> 00:06:17,310
They love
our new ending.
117
00:06:17,344 --> 00:06:19,513
Brilliant scene, dottie.
Alan.
118
00:06:19,547 --> 00:06:21,014
Thank you, farleigh.
119
00:06:21,048 --> 00:06:22,516
So, how was bob?
120
00:06:22,550 --> 00:06:24,485
It's so silly.
We're all out here,
121
00:06:24,518 --> 00:06:25,753
And we never
see him.
122
00:06:25,786 --> 00:06:29,022
Alan, mr. Benchley
has sold out to hollywood.
123
00:06:29,056 --> 00:06:30,458
Really?
124
00:06:30,491 --> 00:06:33,093
A perfect happy-Ending
scene, dottie.
125
00:06:33,126 --> 00:06:34,528
Bravo.
126
00:06:34,562 --> 00:06:37,531
How very kind
of you, seymour...
127
00:06:37,565 --> 00:06:38,832
You monumental shit.
128
00:06:38,866 --> 00:06:42,035
Darling, please
don't use that word.
129
00:06:42,069 --> 00:06:45,038
Well, sorry,
you monumental shit.
130
00:06:45,072 --> 00:06:46,273
Alan.
131
00:06:46,306 --> 00:06:47,541
Yes.
132
00:06:47,575 --> 00:06:49,543
Veronica, make
your heart sing!
133
00:06:49,577 --> 00:06:52,045
Just put it
on the floor, dear.
134
00:06:52,079 --> 00:06:54,582
And action!
135
00:06:54,615 --> 00:06:58,852
I came in such a hurry,
my heart is still pounding.
136
00:06:58,886 --> 00:07:02,089
And i thought it was
valentine's day.
137
00:07:10,464 --> 00:07:14,101
I suppose it was colorful.
138
00:07:16,804 --> 00:07:17,805
Cut!
139
00:07:49,837 --> 00:07:50,604
Ahem.
140
00:07:50,638 --> 00:07:52,172
Oh.
141
00:07:52,205 --> 00:07:53,741
Oh, yes.
Delightful.
142
00:07:53,774 --> 00:07:56,409
How are you today,
mr. Crowninshield, sir?
143
00:07:56,443 --> 00:08:00,047
Oh, the mail elf
is here.
144
00:08:00,080 --> 00:08:01,414
Mr. Elf.
145
00:08:01,448 --> 00:08:04,117
Do you have anything
for me in there?
146
00:08:04,151 --> 00:08:05,886
What's with the sign?
147
00:08:05,919 --> 00:08:08,722
Sorry. We're not allowed
to discuss our salaries.
148
00:08:08,756 --> 00:08:11,959
Crownie's posted
a memo.
149
00:08:11,992 --> 00:08:14,962
There's a love letter
from a soldier in there.
150
00:08:14,995 --> 00:08:16,429
A real letter?
151
00:08:16,463 --> 00:08:17,765
No. Another post card.
152
00:08:17,798 --> 00:08:19,900
War must have run him
short on paper.
153
00:08:19,933 --> 00:08:22,102
What's the difference
between the red...
154
00:08:22,135 --> 00:08:23,837
Don't touch that!
155
00:08:25,472 --> 00:08:28,742
"Dear, if you can send
a cake of working soap,
156
00:08:28,776 --> 00:08:33,146
I think i can arrange
to buy this castle. Ed."
157
00:08:33,180 --> 00:08:36,216
Such passion.
I am overwhelmed.
158
00:08:36,249 --> 00:08:37,718
"If i were better paid,
159
00:08:37,751 --> 00:08:40,087
"I might feel happier about
murdering time
160
00:08:40,120 --> 00:08:41,589
"In an overheated theater.
161
00:08:41,622 --> 00:08:43,657
"Indeed, given the state
in which i hobbled home,
162
00:08:43,691 --> 00:08:45,726
"Bruised and beaten
by the mediocrity
163
00:08:45,759 --> 00:08:47,695
Of both author and cast..."
164
00:08:47,728 --> 00:08:50,197
My, our vines do bear
tender grapes...
165
00:08:50,230 --> 00:08:51,531
"I can only guess
that my refusal
166
00:08:51,565 --> 00:08:52,866
"To list their names here
167
00:08:52,900 --> 00:08:55,002
"Is due to a lingering sense
of playground honor.
168
00:08:55,035 --> 00:08:56,303
I'm not going
to tell on them."
169
00:08:56,336 --> 00:08:57,705
Like it, crownie?
170
00:08:57,738 --> 00:08:59,372
I would have liked it
better if it hadn't been...
171
00:08:59,406 --> 00:09:00,741
Another dull thug
172
00:09:00,774 --> 00:09:03,510
From another one of
your prodigious producers.
173
00:09:03,543 --> 00:09:04,477
That had nothing
to do with it.
174
00:09:04,511 --> 00:09:06,013
How silly of me.
175
00:09:06,046 --> 00:09:08,949
Was it a very big advertisement
he was going to take out?
176
00:09:08,982 --> 00:09:11,218
Not that it matters,
but, yes, a quarter page.
177
00:09:11,251 --> 00:09:13,721
Benchley, why didn't you cut
that bit about her salary?
178
00:09:13,754 --> 00:09:14,855
Would that it
were in my power
179
00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:16,624
To alter
mrs. Parker's wages.
180
00:09:16,657 --> 00:09:19,292
Get rid of that ludicrous sign.
Didn't you see my memo?
181
00:09:19,326 --> 00:09:21,328
I'm hungry.
Aren't you?
182
00:09:21,361 --> 00:09:24,632
No. I'm mr. Sherwood.
183
00:09:24,665 --> 00:09:27,701
You inspire
deathless prose.
184
00:09:27,735 --> 00:09:29,436
I think we'd better
feed mrs. Parker
185
00:09:29,469 --> 00:09:30,270
Before she gets
cranky.
186
00:09:30,303 --> 00:09:31,504
Be careful.
187
00:09:31,538 --> 00:09:33,106
You know she bites
the hand that feeds her.
188
00:09:33,140 --> 00:09:37,044
Oh, i do not.
Do i?
189
00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:18,318
Oh, shit.
190
00:10:28,228 --> 00:10:31,364
I thought i was late.
191
00:10:31,398 --> 00:10:34,001
Not so anyone
would notice.
192
00:10:34,034 --> 00:10:36,770
Only three hours.
193
00:10:40,340 --> 00:10:43,276
What are we doing?
May i come in?
194
00:11:04,231 --> 00:11:06,867
It smells like home.
195
00:11:13,140 --> 00:11:15,375
Thank you.
196
00:11:18,411 --> 00:11:19,747
You must be
terribly hot.
197
00:11:19,780 --> 00:11:22,449
No. No.
Not at all.
198
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:41,168
Oh, dear.
We can't.
199
00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:42,770
Why not?
200
00:11:42,803 --> 00:11:45,038
Don't you want to
feel married again?
201
00:11:45,072 --> 00:11:48,976
I have to be at the
theater in half an hour.
202
00:11:49,009 --> 00:11:50,277
Musical?
203
00:11:50,310 --> 00:11:52,345
No. Ibsen.
204
00:11:52,379 --> 00:11:53,781
Who's he?
205
00:11:53,814 --> 00:11:55,082
You'll like it, idiot.
206
00:11:55,115 --> 00:11:58,051
Gun goes off
in the third act.
207
00:12:03,123 --> 00:12:05,759
So, where is this
mythical husband of yours?
208
00:12:05,793 --> 00:12:08,796
Tonight i rank third
in his affections,
209
00:12:08,829 --> 00:12:11,999
Behind misters
hague and hague.
210
00:12:12,032 --> 00:12:13,801
Please.
211
00:12:13,834 --> 00:12:16,069
I look pitiful
enough.
212
00:12:23,576 --> 00:12:25,245
Oh...
213
00:12:25,278 --> 00:12:29,349
Let's hope the actors don't put
too much glug into their lines.
214
00:12:36,356 --> 00:12:38,325
Eddie!
215
00:12:38,358 --> 00:12:40,861
Eddie, are you hungry?
216
00:12:51,438 --> 00:12:52,873
Eddie.
217
00:12:53,907 --> 00:12:56,043
Eddie, wake up.
218
00:12:56,076 --> 00:12:57,344
Oh, god.
219
00:12:57,377 --> 00:12:59,880
Eddie, wake up.
Wake up.
220
00:13:02,082 --> 00:13:03,884
Kiss me.
221
00:13:05,385 --> 00:13:07,387
Oh, i missed you.
222
00:13:10,257 --> 00:13:17,865
Lady, lady, never speak of
the tears that burn your cheek...
223
00:13:17,898 --> 00:13:20,167
She will never win him,
224
00:13:20,200 --> 00:13:24,737
Whose words had shown
she feared to lose.
225
00:13:24,771 --> 00:13:28,375
Be you wise and never sad,
226
00:13:28,408 --> 00:13:31,378
You will get
your lovely lad.
227
00:13:31,411 --> 00:13:35,182
Never serious be,
nor true,
228
00:13:35,215 --> 00:13:39,186
And your wish
will come to you...
229
00:13:39,219 --> 00:13:42,189
And if that
makes you happy, kid,
230
00:13:42,222 --> 00:13:45,425
You'll be the first
it ever did.
231
00:13:52,866 --> 00:13:54,367
There's the phone.
232
00:13:55,936 --> 00:13:58,771
Young mr. Benchley,
where are you going over there?
233
00:14:00,140 --> 00:14:01,574
Hello.
234
00:14:01,608 --> 00:14:03,911
Hello, gertrude.
It's dorothy.
235
00:14:03,944 --> 00:14:05,913
Something's come up
with work.
236
00:14:05,946 --> 00:14:08,781
May i speak with
mr. Benchley, please?
237
00:14:08,815 --> 00:14:11,518
Certainly.
One moment.
238
00:14:11,551 --> 00:14:13,954
It's dorothy.
239
00:14:15,455 --> 00:14:17,490
On a sunday.
240
00:14:17,524 --> 00:14:18,959
A sunday.
241
00:14:20,961 --> 00:14:22,829
Mrs. Parker,
what happened?
242
00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:24,932
Crownie fired me.
243
00:14:24,965 --> 00:14:27,434
He took me
out to lunch,
244
00:14:27,467 --> 00:14:29,236
And then
he fired me.
245
00:14:29,269 --> 00:14:32,940
He didn't even have
the nerve to say why.
246
00:14:32,973 --> 00:14:35,943
You and i
both know why.
247
00:14:35,976 --> 00:14:37,945
I've wrecked
my career.
248
00:14:37,978 --> 00:14:40,247
Kindly direct me
to hell.
249
00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:42,849
Take two aspirin,
lightly grilled.
250
00:14:42,882 --> 00:14:45,485
I'll be in
on the next train.
251
00:14:47,187 --> 00:14:48,455
Well...
252
00:14:48,488 --> 00:14:49,957
Don't tell me.
253
00:14:49,990 --> 00:14:51,959
I suppose
she started crying.
254
00:14:51,992 --> 00:14:53,260
They fired her.
255
00:14:53,293 --> 00:14:56,997
She did get
a bit weepy, yes.
256
00:14:57,030 --> 00:14:58,932
And then
the bastard offered me
257
00:14:58,966 --> 00:15:00,633
A satisfactory rate.
258
00:15:00,667 --> 00:15:02,135
What does
that mean?
259
00:15:02,169 --> 00:15:03,270
Exactly.
260
00:15:03,303 --> 00:15:07,107
For a few little pieces
at home.
261
00:15:07,140 --> 00:15:09,009
Like i'm a spoiled virgin
262
00:15:09,042 --> 00:15:09,977
And no one else
would have me.
263
00:15:10,010 --> 00:15:11,478
You're not spoiled.
264
00:15:11,511 --> 00:15:12,980
I'm not?
265
00:15:13,013 --> 00:15:15,548
Just
highly seasoned.
266
00:15:15,582 --> 00:15:18,018
What does that mean, bob?
267
00:15:20,320 --> 00:15:23,490
What were you two doing
when i was overseas?
268
00:15:23,523 --> 00:15:25,292
Nothing, ed,
269
00:15:25,325 --> 00:15:29,496
Which is a lot more
than you weren't doing.
270
00:15:29,529 --> 00:15:31,531
Do you mind?
271
00:15:33,233 --> 00:15:34,301
I'm leaving.
272
00:15:34,334 --> 00:15:37,004
I was expecting a raise,
i really was.
273
00:15:55,555 --> 00:15:58,358
Do you mind?
274
00:15:58,391 --> 00:15:59,926
Yes, all right.
Then i'll stop.
275
00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:01,428
The day will arrive
276
00:16:01,461 --> 00:16:04,164
When they come to me on their
knees and beg me to drum.
277
00:16:04,197 --> 00:16:05,932
There will be three
of you today?
278
00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:09,402
Yes. Only three.
279
00:16:09,436 --> 00:16:10,870
I wonder what
the least expensive item is
280
00:16:10,903 --> 00:16:12,372
On this menu.
281
00:16:12,405 --> 00:16:14,107
The eggs.
282
00:16:14,141 --> 00:16:17,944
Uh, yes, i believe
i'll have the eggs.
283
00:16:17,977 --> 00:16:19,646
Same for me, please.
Loosely scrambled,
284
00:16:19,679 --> 00:16:21,581
Like my brains.
285
00:16:21,614 --> 00:16:24,917
Could i get
a half-Order?
286
00:16:24,951 --> 00:16:26,019
Hello, guppies!
287
00:16:26,053 --> 00:16:27,254
What colossal
trumpery
288
00:16:27,287 --> 00:16:29,389
Is taking place at
vanity fair?
289
00:16:29,422 --> 00:16:32,525
Well, mr. Sherwood
was replaced last week
290
00:16:32,559 --> 00:16:34,661
By the woman who gives
music lessons
291
00:16:34,694 --> 00:16:36,429
To conde nast's daughter.
292
00:16:36,463 --> 00:16:38,398
A woman, i might add,
who's so full of charm,
293
00:16:38,431 --> 00:16:41,634
She's practically
panting with it.
294
00:16:41,668 --> 00:16:43,403
And then mrs. Parker
was fired...
295
00:16:43,436 --> 00:16:44,871
Because, i presume,
296
00:16:44,904 --> 00:16:46,973
Vanity fair is a magazine
of no opinion,
297
00:16:47,006 --> 00:16:47,807
And she has plenty.
298
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:49,309
And you, benchley?
299
00:16:49,342 --> 00:16:52,545
We hear your income is
running well into one figure.
300
00:16:52,579 --> 00:16:54,081
Go ahead, rob.
Tell them.
301
00:16:54,114 --> 00:16:55,548
I trust this is for
publication.
302
00:16:55,582 --> 00:16:57,784
Benchley,
one can't simply repeat rumors.
303
00:16:57,817 --> 00:16:59,186
And do it with
some complexity.
304
00:16:59,219 --> 00:17:03,022
I am resigning from
vanity fair...
305
00:17:03,056 --> 00:17:04,424
There will be
five of you today?
306
00:17:04,457 --> 00:17:06,459
Yes. Only five.
307
00:17:06,493 --> 00:17:09,329
I'm, uh...i'm resigning
from the magazine
308
00:17:09,362 --> 00:17:11,931
Because mrs. Parker's dismissal
was remarkably stupid...
309
00:17:11,964 --> 00:17:15,735
Hello, helen!
310
00:17:15,768 --> 00:17:16,703
And unfair.
311
00:17:16,736 --> 00:17:17,737
Helen hayes.
312
00:17:17,770 --> 00:17:20,039
And if i've learned
anything...
313
00:17:20,073 --> 00:17:23,042
I've allowed them
to seat five in the booth.
314
00:17:23,076 --> 00:17:25,044
I know it's
a little disorderly,
315
00:17:25,078 --> 00:17:29,015
But i think we can keep them
from being disruptive.
316
00:17:29,048 --> 00:17:31,050
Everyone,
ross and i have set
317
00:17:31,084 --> 00:17:32,885
A september date
for the wedding!
318
00:17:32,919 --> 00:17:34,020
Congratulations!
319
00:17:34,053 --> 00:17:35,722
Call me cox.
320
00:17:35,755 --> 00:17:37,023
It's damned
embarrassing.
321
00:17:37,056 --> 00:17:38,625
And i'm keeping
my maiden name.
322
00:17:38,658 --> 00:17:39,959
No goddamn music!
323
00:17:39,992 --> 00:17:43,330
No marching down the
aisles to mendelssohn!
324
00:17:43,363 --> 00:17:44,864
I insist on picking out
the wedding ring
325
00:17:44,897 --> 00:17:47,834
And making
all the arrangements.
326
00:17:47,867 --> 00:17:49,068
It's settled!
327
00:17:49,102 --> 00:17:50,537
We must remodel
that ghastly house
328
00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:52,205
Before i move in.
329
00:17:52,239 --> 00:17:54,941
Aleck,
you left the tub full this morning.
330
00:17:54,974 --> 00:17:57,310
In the hopes
that you might take a bath.
331
00:17:57,344 --> 00:17:59,812
I tell you, that house
reeks of sex.
332
00:17:59,846 --> 00:18:01,248
Aleck, how would
you know?
333
00:18:01,281 --> 00:18:03,250
A childhood bout
of the mumps
334
00:18:03,283 --> 00:18:05,585
Killed the impulse
in me.
335
00:18:05,618 --> 00:18:06,919
Don't apologize.
336
00:18:06,953 --> 00:18:08,054
Celibacy sharpens
the senses.
337
00:18:08,087 --> 00:18:10,056
Is this a dagger
i see before me?
338
00:18:10,089 --> 00:18:12,892
I think this calls for
a cele-Bation.
339
00:18:12,925 --> 00:18:14,093
I may not be able
to vote red,
340
00:18:14,127 --> 00:18:15,528
But i can certainly
drink it.
341
00:18:15,562 --> 00:18:17,930
Where's my bread?
342
00:18:17,964 --> 00:18:20,667
I'm hungry!
343
00:18:20,700 --> 00:18:23,870
Bring them some celery
and some popovers or something.
344
00:18:23,903 --> 00:18:25,972
Mr. Case already
told me, sir.
345
00:18:26,005 --> 00:18:28,107
Well, i knew that.
346
00:18:28,141 --> 00:18:30,109
Are you nervous?
Don't be nervous.
347
00:18:30,143 --> 00:18:31,544
I'll take care
of you.
348
00:18:31,578 --> 00:18:34,080
Your royal highnesses,
i give you marc connelly,
349
00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:36,249
Fact-Finder for
the morning telegraph.
350
00:18:36,283 --> 00:18:38,117
Ah, the chorus girl's
breakfast.
351
00:18:38,151 --> 00:18:41,254
Well, i don't actually write
for the telegraph.
352
00:18:41,288 --> 00:18:42,555
11.
353
00:18:42,589 --> 00:18:43,956
A bald man.
354
00:18:43,990 --> 00:18:45,124
Strange.
355
00:18:45,158 --> 00:18:47,427
It feels just like
my wife's behind.
356
00:18:47,460 --> 00:18:49,562
So it does!
357
00:18:49,596 --> 00:18:51,030
Ha ha ha!
358
00:18:51,063 --> 00:18:52,432
Listen, everyone.
359
00:18:52,465 --> 00:18:55,602
Ross is in the planning stages
of a brand-New weekly.
360
00:18:55,635 --> 00:18:58,104
Something similar to what you're doing now,
ross?
361
00:18:58,137 --> 00:18:59,606
Just what the world
is waiting for,
362
00:18:59,639 --> 00:19:01,741
Another publication for
little old ladies in dubuque.
363
00:19:01,774 --> 00:19:05,545
Don't ask us to be on your advisory board.
It'll ruin our appetites.
364
00:19:05,578 --> 00:19:07,747
Does that mean you're
interested, aleck?
365
00:19:07,780 --> 00:19:09,516
You remind me
a great deal
366
00:19:09,549 --> 00:19:10,883
Of my grandfather's
coachman.
367
00:19:10,917 --> 00:19:13,253
A horse's ass
would know the coachman.
368
00:19:13,286 --> 00:19:14,921
Oh, here's kaufman!
369
00:19:14,954 --> 00:19:16,823
George, over here!
370
00:19:16,856 --> 00:19:18,057
Table for one,
sir?
371
00:19:18,090 --> 00:19:19,759
Everyone,
i'd like you to meet
372
00:19:19,792 --> 00:19:22,495
My assistant at the new york times,
george s. Kaufman.
373
00:19:22,529 --> 00:19:23,062
A jew.
374
00:19:23,095 --> 00:19:23,730
Gesundheit.
375
00:19:23,763 --> 00:19:24,931
Shalom.
376
00:19:24,964 --> 00:19:26,266
I'm no longer
your assistant, aleck.
377
00:19:26,299 --> 00:19:27,300
You haven't converted,
i trust.
378
00:19:27,334 --> 00:19:29,236
No, just promoted.
379
00:19:29,269 --> 00:19:30,337
You look
terrible.
380
00:19:30,370 --> 00:19:31,738
Terrible would be
an improvement.
381
00:19:31,771 --> 00:19:32,972
Harold ross,
american legion weekly.
382
00:19:33,005 --> 00:19:34,073
You shouldn't
touch george.
383
00:19:34,106 --> 00:19:35,475
George doesn't like
to be touched.
384
00:19:35,508 --> 00:19:36,809
How many will there be
for lunch?
385
00:19:36,843 --> 00:19:39,812
There will be
two of everybody!
386
00:19:39,846 --> 00:19:41,814
Mr. Case
won't like this.
387
00:19:41,848 --> 00:19:44,016
Oh, well.
Case closed.
388
00:19:45,218 --> 00:19:47,186
Yes, bob?
You rang?
389
00:19:47,220 --> 00:19:51,491
I...I...I'm afraid
i have...
390
00:19:51,524 --> 00:19:55,362
I am resigning my position
at vanity fair.
391
00:19:55,395 --> 00:19:56,629
Why?
392
00:19:56,663 --> 00:19:59,499
Well, because my job,
if you could call it that,
393
00:19:59,532 --> 00:20:01,534
As managing editor
is no longer attractive
394
00:20:01,568 --> 00:20:04,804
Without the extraordinary
talents of mrs. Parker
395
00:20:04,837 --> 00:20:07,206
And mr. Sherwood.
396
00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:09,709
This is not
a reckless decision.
397
00:20:09,742 --> 00:20:10,977
I'm a careful man,
398
00:20:11,010 --> 00:20:12,111
One who often
wears a belt,
399
00:20:12,144 --> 00:20:13,913
As well as suspenders.
400
00:20:13,946 --> 00:20:16,583
Bravo.
Bravo, bob.
401
00:20:17,584 --> 00:20:19,051
Think of us fondly,
please,
402
00:20:19,085 --> 00:20:21,153
As ships departing
a sinking rat.
403
00:20:21,187 --> 00:20:24,624
Well, make a good
union man.
404
00:20:24,657 --> 00:20:25,758
Ha ha ha!
405
00:20:25,792 --> 00:20:27,226
What was that
all about?
406
00:20:27,260 --> 00:20:29,228
Uh, mr. Woollcott,
407
00:20:29,262 --> 00:20:32,231
Have to remind you,
as of this week,
408
00:20:32,265 --> 00:20:34,534
Drinking alcohol
here is illegal.
409
00:20:34,567 --> 00:20:38,104
Geoplenarian,
i am interested only in things
410
00:20:38,137 --> 00:20:41,240
That are illegal, immoral,
or fattening.
411
00:20:41,274 --> 00:20:43,242
It's wine,
not alcohol.
412
00:20:43,276 --> 00:20:44,711
Ice, please.
413
00:20:51,584 --> 00:20:53,753
Are you all right,
mrs. Parker?
414
00:20:53,786 --> 00:20:55,555
Oh, that man
is a mess.
415
00:20:55,588 --> 00:20:58,057
Kaufman...Oh, i think
he's rather quick.
416
00:20:58,090 --> 00:20:59,392
Is that
what his name is?
417
00:20:59,426 --> 00:21:00,259
Yes.
418
00:21:00,293 --> 00:21:02,929
Oh, i never saw
such a thing.
419
00:21:02,962 --> 00:21:06,232
He's a twitchy fella.
420
00:21:06,265 --> 00:21:10,770
Mr. Benchley, are you
quite sure about this?
421
00:21:10,803 --> 00:21:12,271
Positive, mrs. Parker.
422
00:21:12,305 --> 00:21:16,175
Listen, you can't buy
the kind of advertising
423
00:21:16,208 --> 00:21:17,009
They'll be giving us.
424
00:21:17,043 --> 00:21:17,677
We'll be freelancers.
425
00:21:17,710 --> 00:21:18,511
Oh, my god.
426
00:21:18,545 --> 00:21:20,447
We'll write
only what we like,
427
00:21:20,480 --> 00:21:23,916
Not slave over a hot desk
for people like conde nast.
428
00:21:23,950 --> 00:21:26,619
Have you told
gertrude?
429
00:21:26,653 --> 00:21:27,787
Pardon.
430
00:21:33,326 --> 00:21:34,994
Is there a problem?
431
00:21:35,027 --> 00:21:36,162
Don't worry
about a thing.
432
00:21:36,195 --> 00:21:37,096
I've set this kind
of fracture before
433
00:21:37,129 --> 00:21:38,230
Without much pain,
434
00:21:38,264 --> 00:21:39,466
But we must get started
immediately.
435
00:21:39,499 --> 00:21:41,300
Mrs. Beemish,
please take a seat.
436
00:21:41,334 --> 00:21:42,101
Does it hurt?
437
00:21:42,134 --> 00:21:43,069
Oh, it's dreadful.
438
00:21:43,102 --> 00:21:43,903
Please don't try
to speak.
439
00:21:43,936 --> 00:21:45,838
I need room to work.
440
00:21:49,108 --> 00:21:50,209
We'll rent an office
together,
441
00:21:50,242 --> 00:21:51,010
Move in,
442
00:21:51,043 --> 00:21:52,278
Cheer each other on.
443
00:21:52,311 --> 00:21:54,013
You can try your dainty
hand at fiction,
444
00:21:54,046 --> 00:21:56,349
And i'll start
my history
445
00:21:56,383 --> 00:21:59,251
Of the queen anne humorists...
Both of them.
446
00:21:59,285 --> 00:22:01,921
Mr. Benchley...
447
00:22:01,954 --> 00:22:05,291
I feel as though you're
proposing marriage.
448
00:22:05,324 --> 00:22:08,094
Many torments lie
in the small circle
449
00:22:08,127 --> 00:22:10,029
Of a wedding ring.
450
00:22:10,062 --> 00:22:11,664
What if
it doesn't work?
451
00:22:11,698 --> 00:22:13,666
Well, we'll just
yearn a living.
452
00:22:13,700 --> 00:22:17,437
First, we need a name
for the office door.
453
00:22:17,470 --> 00:22:19,772
Utica drop forge
and tool company.
454
00:22:19,806 --> 00:22:20,873
Perfect.
455
00:22:20,907 --> 00:22:22,475
Robert benchley,
president.
456
00:22:22,509 --> 00:22:26,012
Dorothy parker,
president.
457
00:22:26,045 --> 00:22:29,248
Dorothy...
458
00:22:29,281 --> 00:22:30,550
I could kiss you,
459
00:22:30,583 --> 00:22:34,253
But i'm not sure
it would come out right.
460
00:22:34,286 --> 00:22:36,556
You're afraid
you might
461
00:22:36,589 --> 00:22:39,759
Melt the gold
in my teeth.
462
00:22:39,792 --> 00:22:41,561
Huh?
463
00:22:41,594 --> 00:22:44,564
Afraid i might
lose you.
464
00:22:44,597 --> 00:22:47,266
I know
i'm losing eddie.
465
00:22:47,299 --> 00:22:50,069
I couldn't bear
losing you, too.
466
00:22:50,102 --> 00:22:52,338
You'd have to wear a pretty
large hole in your pocket
467
00:22:52,371 --> 00:22:55,374
To lose me,
mrs. Parker.
468
00:22:55,408 --> 00:22:57,143
The eggs
are getting cold.
469
00:22:57,176 --> 00:22:58,511
Ah.
470
00:23:09,822 --> 00:23:11,290
Much better.
471
00:23:11,323 --> 00:23:14,293
Have to be comfortable
when i sit down to write,
472
00:23:14,326 --> 00:23:16,295
Because that's where
i shine.
473
00:23:20,833 --> 00:23:22,301
Park bench.
474
00:23:22,334 --> 00:23:23,536
Mm-Hmm.
475
00:23:23,570 --> 00:23:25,605
May i tell her
who's calling?
476
00:23:25,638 --> 00:23:27,807
Does the cent sign
go before or after?
477
00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:29,075
After.
478
00:23:29,108 --> 00:23:30,342
This is mr. Nichols.
479
00:23:30,376 --> 00:23:33,112
Wants to know
where your story is.
480
00:23:33,145 --> 00:23:34,614
Oh.
481
00:23:34,647 --> 00:23:36,849
Tell him something,
will you?
482
00:23:38,150 --> 00:23:41,420
I'm afraid mrs. Parker's had
some sort of an attack.
483
00:23:41,454 --> 00:23:43,656
They're in the process now
of freezing her appendix.
484
00:23:43,690 --> 00:23:45,191
The doctor thinks
we may get it
485
00:23:45,224 --> 00:23:48,628
To listen to reason
this way.
486
00:23:48,661 --> 00:23:51,831
Yeah. All right.
Certainly.
487
00:23:51,864 --> 00:23:53,165
Good-Bye.
488
00:23:54,667 --> 00:23:57,336
Has to be in
by tomorrow.
489
00:23:57,369 --> 00:24:00,072
Oh. Shit.
490
00:24:00,106 --> 00:24:04,844
I may die before a train of
thought leaves the station.
491
00:24:04,877 --> 00:24:07,346
Me, too.
492
00:24:07,379 --> 00:24:09,348
Let's change places.
493
00:24:09,381 --> 00:24:11,183
All right.
494
00:24:14,020 --> 00:24:16,355
Hmm...well.
Pardon me.
495
00:24:16,388 --> 00:24:18,190
Excuse me.
496
00:24:29,135 --> 00:24:34,541
We'd build a little bungalow,
if you and i were one,
497
00:24:34,574 --> 00:24:40,279
And carefully we'd plan it
so we'd get the morning sun.
498
00:24:40,312 --> 00:24:44,250
I'd rise each day
at rosy dawn
499
00:24:44,283 --> 00:24:46,385
And bustle gaily down.
500
00:24:46,418 --> 00:24:49,689
In evening's cool,
you'd spray the lawn
501
00:24:49,722 --> 00:24:52,759
When you come back
from town.
502
00:24:52,792 --> 00:24:56,395
If you and i were one,
my dear,
503
00:24:56,428 --> 00:24:58,731
A model life we'd lead.
504
00:24:58,765 --> 00:25:02,702
We'd travel on
from year to year,
505
00:25:02,735 --> 00:25:07,139
At no increase of speed.
506
00:25:07,173 --> 00:25:10,610
Ah, clear to me
the vision of the things
507
00:25:10,643 --> 00:25:13,580
That we should do.
508
00:25:13,613 --> 00:25:17,483
And so i think it best,
my love,
509
00:25:17,516 --> 00:25:19,919
To string along as two.
510
00:25:19,952 --> 00:25:21,420
Here, dear?
511
00:25:21,453 --> 00:25:22,955
Oh, to the right.
512
00:25:25,457 --> 00:25:27,226
Oh, how do you do?
I'm neyso mcmain.
513
00:25:27,259 --> 00:25:28,427
I'm your neighbor.
514
00:25:28,460 --> 00:25:30,697
Would you like
a drink?
515
00:25:30,730 --> 00:25:32,398
Sworn off.
Thank you.
516
00:25:32,431 --> 00:25:34,734
Oh, well, if you should
ever want to come by,
517
00:25:34,767 --> 00:25:37,804
My door is open,
day and night.
518
00:25:37,837 --> 00:25:41,473
Hotel algonquin.
Please hold.
519
00:25:41,507 --> 00:25:43,743
O'neill's won
the pulitzer, aleck!
520
00:25:43,776 --> 00:25:45,745
Hey, john.
How are you?
521
00:25:45,778 --> 00:25:48,314
Hello, mr. Woollcott.
How you doing?
522
00:25:48,347 --> 00:25:50,116
You know everyone.
Everyone, will.
523
00:25:50,149 --> 00:25:51,450
Mr. Benchley.
524
00:25:51,483 --> 00:25:53,119
How do you do?
Robert benchley.
525
00:25:53,152 --> 00:25:54,453
Will rogers.
526
00:25:54,486 --> 00:25:56,255
Nice to meet you,
miss parker.
527
00:25:56,288 --> 00:25:59,491
I never liked a man
i didn't meet.
528
00:25:59,525 --> 00:26:00,993
Thank you, i guess.
529
00:26:01,027 --> 00:26:03,295
So, aleck, will rogers
for president.
530
00:26:03,329 --> 00:26:04,096
What do you think?
531
00:26:04,130 --> 00:26:05,464
Get out of here.
532
00:26:05,497 --> 00:26:06,532
Now that women
have the vote,
533
00:26:06,565 --> 00:26:07,667
What do you think,
ladies?
534
00:26:07,700 --> 00:26:11,170
It is a lovely hat.
535
00:26:11,203 --> 00:26:13,539
It's the hat that gets
you in the white house.
536
00:26:13,572 --> 00:26:14,874
This must be
the smallest table
537
00:26:14,907 --> 00:26:16,876
In the biggest city
on the planet here.
538
00:26:16,909 --> 00:26:18,177
You folks got sore knees
under there?
539
00:26:18,210 --> 00:26:23,315
We need a ouija board.
We'd divine the future.
540
00:26:23,349 --> 00:26:25,184
Future looks
pretty divine to me.
541
00:26:25,217 --> 00:26:31,791
Georges, tell mr. Case
i've had a great idea.
542
00:26:31,824 --> 00:26:33,826
He might not
believe it, sir.
543
00:26:33,860 --> 00:26:37,163
If ziegfeld changed the name
of the show...
544
00:26:37,196 --> 00:26:38,364
I'm sorry.
What did you say?
545
00:26:38,397 --> 00:26:40,232
Wisdom, every word.
546
00:26:40,266 --> 00:26:42,334
Serge.
547
00:28:06,986 --> 00:28:10,256
Ross, use the word "dog"
in a sentence.
548
00:28:12,624 --> 00:28:14,360
We'll give you time.
549
00:28:14,393 --> 00:28:15,594
Get her a drink.
550
00:28:15,627 --> 00:28:17,129
Would you
like a drink?
551
00:28:17,163 --> 00:28:19,732
Please, come.
552
00:28:21,433 --> 00:28:22,668
Well, neyso, i think
553
00:28:22,701 --> 00:28:24,103
If you loiter in your
studio long enough,
554
00:28:24,136 --> 00:28:26,705
The whole world will
drift in and out.
555
00:28:26,739 --> 00:28:27,774
That's the point.
556
00:28:27,807 --> 00:28:28,841
Sour trumpet
at the end
557
00:28:28,875 --> 00:28:30,843
Of a third-Rate
marching band.
558
00:28:30,877 --> 00:28:33,212
Round of cards?
I'll get the girls.
559
00:28:33,245 --> 00:28:34,546
The girls?
560
00:28:34,580 --> 00:28:35,948
Poker.
Yes, i'd love to.
561
00:28:35,982 --> 00:28:37,416
You're a celebrity,
george, face it.
562
00:28:37,449 --> 00:28:39,685
Right.
A temporary one.
563
00:28:39,718 --> 00:28:40,719
There's not
another kind.
564
00:28:40,753 --> 00:28:42,354
My point exactly.
565
00:28:42,388 --> 00:28:43,455
Come on, don.
Ardent fidelity.
566
00:28:43,489 --> 00:28:44,390
That's
the first thing
567
00:28:44,423 --> 00:28:45,457
That springs
to your mind
568
00:28:45,491 --> 00:28:46,692
When you think
of mrs. Parker.
569
00:28:46,725 --> 00:28:47,927
Well, it's not
the first thing,
570
00:28:47,960 --> 00:28:52,799
But gradually, i work
my way back around.
571
00:28:52,832 --> 00:28:53,933
let's take a walk
through here.
572
00:28:53,966 --> 00:28:55,768
I'll show you some
of miss mcmain's
573
00:28:55,802 --> 00:28:58,437
Extraordinarily
useless object d'art.
574
00:28:58,470 --> 00:29:00,239
Your apartment
is just lovely.
575
00:29:00,272 --> 00:29:02,641
You think?
It's that slavic architecture.
576
00:29:02,674 --> 00:29:04,510
It's just like
a dormitory here.
577
00:29:04,543 --> 00:29:06,512
Oh, ho.
578
00:29:06,545 --> 00:29:08,647
Just like
a dormitory here.
579
00:29:08,680 --> 00:29:09,849
I was
just saying,
580
00:29:09,882 --> 00:29:11,150
The par...Well,
here they are now.
581
00:29:11,183 --> 00:29:13,419
The parkers live just
across the hall.
582
00:29:13,452 --> 00:29:15,187
That's why...
583
00:29:15,221 --> 00:29:17,489
It's kind of you letting
robert sleep over
584
00:29:17,523 --> 00:29:18,624
When he
works late.
585
00:29:18,657 --> 00:29:19,758
Sometimes
i think
586
00:29:19,792 --> 00:29:21,493
You see more of
him than i do.
587
00:29:21,527 --> 00:29:22,461
I'm always
very modest.
588
00:29:22,494 --> 00:29:23,329
You know that,
gertrude.
589
00:29:23,362 --> 00:29:24,496
It must
be wonderful
590
00:29:24,530 --> 00:29:26,532
To never have babies
waking you up.
591
00:29:26,565 --> 00:29:29,201
They don't allow
babies in dormitories.
592
00:29:29,235 --> 00:29:31,637
not that there's anything
wrong with babies.
593
00:29:31,670 --> 00:29:32,604
If there were,
gertrude,
594
00:29:32,638 --> 00:29:35,341
You'd be arrested
by now.
595
00:29:35,374 --> 00:29:37,977
ha ha! Well...
596
00:29:38,010 --> 00:29:41,814
I'm sorry. I...
i didn't understand.
597
00:29:41,848 --> 00:29:43,682
For being so good
with them.
598
00:29:43,715 --> 00:29:45,117
Thank you.
599
00:29:45,151 --> 00:29:46,485
and you are good
with them, god knows.
600
00:29:46,518 --> 00:29:47,586
They worship her.
601
00:29:47,619 --> 00:29:50,422
I don't think
they know who i am.
602
00:29:50,456 --> 00:29:51,457
Aren't you and eddie
anxious
603
00:29:51,490 --> 00:29:52,859
To start a family
of your own?
604
00:29:52,892 --> 00:29:55,661
Oh, good...
heavens no.
605
00:29:55,694 --> 00:29:58,264
My mother was 42
when i was born.
606
00:29:58,297 --> 00:29:59,565
Of course, then
she promptly went
607
00:29:59,598 --> 00:30:00,766
And died on me,
608
00:30:00,799 --> 00:30:03,769
So maybe waiting
isn't such a good idea.
609
00:30:03,802 --> 00:30:06,705
Reminds me,
i need another drink.
610
00:30:06,738 --> 00:30:07,473
Anybody?
611
00:30:07,506 --> 00:30:09,675
Uh, no. No.
612
00:30:09,708 --> 00:30:11,710
You know, my mother
was 34 when she had me,
613
00:30:11,743 --> 00:30:13,946
But then again,
she had the good graces
614
00:30:13,980 --> 00:30:16,382
To wait until i was 12
before she passed away.
615
00:30:16,415 --> 00:30:19,718
she was always
the politest of women.
616
00:30:19,751 --> 00:30:21,921
oh, well, here's
a lovely picture...
617
00:30:21,954 --> 00:30:23,822
Benchley
and his two wives.
618
00:30:23,856 --> 00:30:24,623
Not nice, aleck.
619
00:30:24,656 --> 00:30:25,958
Oh, come on, sherry.
620
00:30:25,992 --> 00:30:28,427
Don't say it's
an intellectual relationship.
621
00:30:28,460 --> 00:30:29,495
What does
that mean?
622
00:30:29,528 --> 00:30:30,762
Yes,
what does that mean?
623
00:30:30,796 --> 00:30:33,332
In their minds,
they "mmm" like bunnies.
624
00:30:33,365 --> 00:30:35,868
Oh, mr. Benchley.
625
00:30:35,902 --> 00:30:38,037
How's eddie doing?
He seems all right.
626
00:30:38,070 --> 00:30:41,673
Well, i think he's
off the morphine, anyway.
627
00:30:41,707 --> 00:30:43,375
Now he wants to move
back to hartford
628
00:30:43,409 --> 00:30:45,411
To be near his family.
629
00:30:45,444 --> 00:30:47,046
I don't know.
630
00:30:47,079 --> 00:30:49,548
Maybe it'll be easier
for him there.
631
00:30:49,581 --> 00:30:52,919
At least they know
how to keep house.
632
00:30:52,952 --> 00:30:55,988
Wifely chores can be
lethal, mr. Benchley.
633
00:30:56,022 --> 00:30:57,489
Only if done
properly.
634
00:30:57,523 --> 00:30:59,858
You're much too hard on yourself,
mrs. Parker.
635
00:30:59,892 --> 00:31:01,693
A little garbage
gives a house
636
00:31:01,727 --> 00:31:02,794
That lived-In
feeling.
637
00:31:02,828 --> 00:31:03,963
Robert.
638
00:31:03,996 --> 00:31:06,432
Pull a bed sheet
over it or something.
639
00:31:06,465 --> 00:31:08,034
The coward's way out?
640
00:31:08,067 --> 00:31:09,401
robert.
641
00:31:09,435 --> 00:31:13,005
Excuse me, please.
I must find the ladies room.
642
00:31:13,039 --> 00:31:15,507
It's just to the left here.
Right...
643
00:31:15,541 --> 00:31:17,143
Right around
the corner there.
644
00:31:17,176 --> 00:31:19,578
Do you know where
the ladies room is?
645
00:31:19,611 --> 00:31:21,313
Here, take
one of mine.
646
00:31:21,347 --> 00:31:22,648
No, i don't drink.
647
00:31:22,681 --> 00:31:24,416
All right.
It's just in the back.
648
00:31:24,450 --> 00:31:27,453
Oh, uh, you've, uh,
forgotten your, uh...
649
00:31:27,486 --> 00:31:30,222
Soul, as usual.
650
00:31:32,091 --> 00:31:34,060
If our mrs. Parker
used her body
651
00:31:34,093 --> 00:31:36,062
The way she uses
her mouth...
652
00:31:36,095 --> 00:31:37,396
Dottie,
20 questions.
653
00:31:37,429 --> 00:31:38,998
I'm thinking
of a person.
654
00:31:39,031 --> 00:31:41,000
I'm so happy
for you, ross.
655
00:31:41,033 --> 00:31:43,102
Would he be
the kind of man
656
00:31:43,135 --> 00:31:45,137
To put the wings
back on flies?
657
00:31:45,171 --> 00:31:46,905
I know nothing
about entomology.
658
00:31:46,939 --> 00:31:49,241
Compassion, not bugs.
Right?
659
00:31:49,275 --> 00:31:51,577
Who's that sitting
with deems taylor?
660
00:31:51,610 --> 00:31:53,079
Mary kennedy.
661
00:31:53,112 --> 00:31:55,281
She's consoling him
through his divorce.
662
00:31:55,314 --> 00:31:56,915
But if i were you,
663
00:31:56,949 --> 00:32:00,019
I would be paying more
attention to my own flanks
664
00:32:00,052 --> 00:32:02,288
Than to his
at the moment.
665
00:32:04,190 --> 00:32:07,593
Paula, i see you've met
my little husband.
666
00:32:07,626 --> 00:32:10,129
Oh! So this
is eddie.
667
00:32:10,162 --> 00:32:10,929
Hmm.
668
00:32:10,963 --> 00:32:12,898
Well, how's
your arm, dear?
669
00:32:12,931 --> 00:32:14,233
My arm?
670
00:32:14,266 --> 00:32:15,667
Why, yes.
Dottie said you broke it
671
00:32:15,701 --> 00:32:18,104
Sharpening
a pencil?
672
00:32:18,137 --> 00:32:19,705
Did she?
Excuse me.
673
00:32:19,738 --> 00:32:22,808
You did say that,
didn't you, dot?
674
00:32:22,841 --> 00:32:25,811
Paula, your slip
is showing.
675
00:32:25,844 --> 00:32:27,679
It's on purpose,
dear.
676
00:32:27,713 --> 00:32:29,015
Hmm.
677
00:32:29,048 --> 00:32:31,350
How like your acting
that is.
678
00:32:31,383 --> 00:32:33,619
Excuse me.
679
00:32:33,652 --> 00:32:35,321
Ha ha ha.
680
00:32:35,354 --> 00:32:37,623
Ah, hello, frank.
681
00:32:37,656 --> 00:32:40,026
Take care of
your body, paula,
682
00:32:40,059 --> 00:32:41,827
Because
when it goes,
683
00:32:41,860 --> 00:32:44,130
You'll have
nothing left.
684
00:32:47,666 --> 00:32:49,068
Shouldn't you
leave some
685
00:32:49,101 --> 00:32:50,602
For the other
guests, eddie?
686
00:32:50,636 --> 00:32:51,803
I have to exercise my arm
687
00:32:51,837 --> 00:32:54,140
After all those weeks
in a cast, dear.
688
00:32:54,173 --> 00:32:55,507
I never said
such a thing.
689
00:32:55,541 --> 00:32:56,942
Sure, you did.
690
00:32:56,975 --> 00:32:59,445
They know better than
to expect anything from me,
691
00:32:59,478 --> 00:33:01,113
Thanks to you.
692
00:33:01,147 --> 00:33:02,114
You don't want
to become
693
00:33:02,148 --> 00:33:04,050
The town drunk,
eddie,
694
00:33:04,083 --> 00:33:05,051
Not
in manhattan.
695
00:33:05,084 --> 00:33:06,018
You know,
i think that you
696
00:33:06,052 --> 00:33:08,754
Ought to drink
more, dear.
697
00:33:08,787 --> 00:33:12,091
Then maybe you could
stop nagging me.
698
00:33:14,993 --> 00:33:20,699
I may be a dimwit
and a lousy drunk, dear,
699
00:33:20,732 --> 00:33:23,069
But you
and your friends...
700
00:33:25,637 --> 00:33:26,872
Eddie.
701
00:33:26,905 --> 00:33:28,174
Oh!
702
00:33:28,207 --> 00:33:31,710
It's o.K. It's o.K.
It's o.K.
703
00:34:00,639 --> 00:34:02,574
I'm sorry.
704
00:34:02,608 --> 00:34:04,210
I'm sorry. I...
705
00:34:04,243 --> 00:34:06,212
I didn't know
what to do,
706
00:34:06,245 --> 00:34:10,216
So i...i just
held my breath.
707
00:34:10,249 --> 00:34:13,119
Are...Are you
all right?
708
00:34:16,255 --> 00:34:18,324
I'm just so grateful
robert doesn't drink.
709
00:34:18,357 --> 00:34:19,691
His uncle did,
you know,
710
00:34:19,725 --> 00:34:22,561
So he's seen
the damage done.
711
00:34:23,762 --> 00:34:26,265
Do you really
like that?
712
00:34:27,866 --> 00:34:29,168
Not much.
713
00:34:29,201 --> 00:34:32,771
But it's better than
a sock in the eye.
714
00:34:36,475 --> 00:34:37,443
Ha ha ha!
715
00:34:37,476 --> 00:34:40,579
So anyway, i asked him
if he'd ever read
716
00:34:40,612 --> 00:34:41,947
Edna ferber's new book.
717
00:34:41,980 --> 00:34:43,582
It's a very full book.
718
00:34:43,615 --> 00:34:45,217
Full of what,
ross?
719
00:34:45,251 --> 00:34:46,585
Full of
not being edited.
720
00:34:46,618 --> 00:34:48,019
And this from
the editor
721
00:34:48,053 --> 00:34:49,421
Of american legion
magazine, mind you.
722
00:34:49,455 --> 00:34:50,556
You could do
723
00:34:50,589 --> 00:34:52,924
With a little trimming yourself,
my dumpling.
724
00:34:52,958 --> 00:34:53,759
So it's thin,
thinning,
725
00:34:53,792 --> 00:34:54,926
Or needs thinning.
726
00:34:54,960 --> 00:34:56,295
Three words aleck
has never heard of.
727
00:34:56,328 --> 00:34:59,097
That's almost
a subjective completion.
728
00:34:59,131 --> 00:35:01,133
What ross means is that
stories flow easily
729
00:35:01,167 --> 00:35:02,468
From edna's
fingertips.
730
00:35:02,501 --> 00:35:04,603
i understand
she fairly whistles
731
00:35:04,636 --> 00:35:06,104
At her typewriter.
732
00:35:06,138 --> 00:35:08,907
And there was that poor
sucker flaubert
733
00:35:08,940 --> 00:35:10,909
Rolling around
on the floor for days,
734
00:35:10,942 --> 00:35:12,711
Looking for just
the right words.
735
00:35:12,744 --> 00:35:15,281
well, dottie, i do
love your pieces,
736
00:35:15,314 --> 00:35:17,283
And when ross launches
his new magazine,
737
00:35:17,316 --> 00:35:19,285
You'll have to be
part of it.
738
00:35:19,318 --> 00:35:21,287
No other woman
writes like you do.
739
00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:22,788
Who would
want to?
740
00:35:22,821 --> 00:35:24,556
Listen, i read
your new piece
741
00:35:24,590 --> 00:35:25,357
In the smart set
742
00:35:25,391 --> 00:35:26,692
Over and over
again, dottie.
743
00:35:26,725 --> 00:35:27,826
It was wonderful.
744
00:35:27,859 --> 00:35:29,094
How sweet, ross.
745
00:35:29,127 --> 00:35:30,896
Didn't he understand
it the first time?
746
00:35:33,699 --> 00:35:35,534
Alan, dust off your tutu.
It's official.
747
00:35:35,567 --> 00:35:37,236
We've rented
the 49th street theater
748
00:35:37,269 --> 00:35:38,704
For sunday, april 30th.
749
00:35:38,737 --> 00:35:41,307
Bravo!
Hey!
750
00:35:41,340 --> 00:35:44,109
As our treasurer, i feel
compelled to ask...
751
00:35:44,142 --> 00:35:45,277
How much?
752
00:35:45,311 --> 00:35:46,612
I made
a great deal.
753
00:35:46,645 --> 00:35:48,480
They gave us the sleeves
off their vests.
754
00:35:48,514 --> 00:35:50,081
Kaufman should have
negotiated.
755
00:35:50,115 --> 00:35:51,183
He's
the christ killer.
756
00:35:51,217 --> 00:35:52,618
One more slur
upon my race, aleck,
757
00:35:52,651 --> 00:35:54,186
And i'm walking away
from this table,
758
00:35:54,220 --> 00:35:56,788
Out of the dining room,
and away from this hotel.
759
00:35:56,822 --> 00:35:57,856
I trust that mrs. Parker
760
00:35:57,889 --> 00:36:01,693
Will walk out with me
halfway?
761
00:36:01,727 --> 00:36:02,928
Raoul fleischmann
was 14
762
00:36:02,961 --> 00:36:05,030
Before he realized
he was a jew.
763
00:36:05,063 --> 00:36:07,065
I was 16 before
i realized i was a boy.
764
00:36:07,098 --> 00:36:09,000
What convinced you?
765
00:36:09,034 --> 00:36:10,101
Gravity.
766
00:36:10,135 --> 00:36:11,803
Sex laws
of a newton.
767
00:36:11,837 --> 00:36:14,340
Mmm. Chemin de fer.
768
00:36:14,373 --> 00:36:15,607
Mirabile
dictum.
769
00:36:15,641 --> 00:36:17,175
Oh!
Oh!
770
00:36:17,209 --> 00:36:18,410
What on earth
are they talking about?
771
00:36:18,444 --> 00:36:19,845
And don't tell me
you understand.
772
00:36:19,878 --> 00:36:23,249
Too much for
your precious ears.
773
00:36:23,282 --> 00:36:26,552
Why,
speaking of stage-Struck jewish nuns,
774
00:36:26,585 --> 00:36:28,587
Here's edna!
775
00:36:28,620 --> 00:36:31,290
You almost look like
a man today, edna.
776
00:36:31,323 --> 00:36:33,158
So do you, aleck.
777
00:36:33,191 --> 00:36:36,362
Madam ferber's so
diligent in her duties,
778
00:36:36,395 --> 00:36:38,297
I'm surprised
she's deigned to join us.
779
00:36:38,330 --> 00:36:40,366
Well, coffee and sandwiches
aren't my usual,
780
00:36:40,399 --> 00:36:42,133
But don't make me out
a dullard to your friends.
781
00:36:42,167 --> 00:36:44,102
I always say, "there's
no good sauce for play
782
00:36:44,135 --> 00:36:45,737
Like hard work."
783
00:36:45,771 --> 00:36:47,539
Please, sit down.
784
00:36:47,573 --> 00:36:49,007
Bite your tongue,
mistress,
785
00:36:49,040 --> 00:36:52,878
Before our mrs. Parker
does it for you.
786
00:36:52,911 --> 00:36:54,413
Ah, the two of you split
787
00:36:54,446 --> 00:36:56,081
Without having written
a flop yet, hey, marc?
788
00:36:56,114 --> 00:36:57,416
That'll be
the day.
789
00:36:57,449 --> 00:36:59,985
Oh, flops...
These days, they're just a play
790
00:37:00,018 --> 00:37:01,787
Where no one wears
evening clothes.
791
00:37:01,820 --> 00:37:04,390
An edna ferberating statement
if ever i've heard one.
792
00:37:04,423 --> 00:37:06,892
Oh, that couldn't be
ferber from the truth.
793
00:37:06,925 --> 00:37:08,260
You know
what i admire?
794
00:37:08,294 --> 00:37:09,361
An artist who's
got enough brio
795
00:37:09,395 --> 00:37:11,263
To embrace
main street.
796
00:37:11,297 --> 00:37:12,264
Though the range
of his works
797
00:37:12,298 --> 00:37:14,966
May be from
bad to horrible?
798
00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:16,868
I think far
too wide a stretch
799
00:37:16,902 --> 00:37:19,070
Is made of
the word "artist,"
800
00:37:19,104 --> 00:37:19,971
Because
i don't think
801
00:37:20,005 --> 00:37:22,274
That word is
elastic.
802
00:37:22,308 --> 00:37:27,279
If i did, i'd be
better company.
803
00:37:27,313 --> 00:37:28,714
Well, i think
804
00:37:28,747 --> 00:37:32,050
You're wonderful
company, mrs. Parker.
805
00:37:32,083 --> 00:37:35,086
Homemade fudge,
anyone?
806
00:37:35,120 --> 00:37:36,422
Edna, uh...
807
00:37:36,455 --> 00:37:38,123
I love your fudge,
george.
808
00:37:38,156 --> 00:37:39,758
Who's the actual
producer
809
00:37:39,791 --> 00:37:41,393
Of no good ring?
810
00:37:41,427 --> 00:37:42,694
my little dream princess,
811
00:37:42,728 --> 00:37:46,465
I will plan, cast, and polish
the entire revue
812
00:37:46,498 --> 00:37:48,934
With my usual
revolutionary taste.
813
00:37:48,967 --> 00:37:50,268
The devil you will.
814
00:37:52,203 --> 00:37:55,874
Ladies and gentlemen,
815
00:37:55,907 --> 00:38:00,546
Tonight, 12 rounds
in 3 acts
816
00:38:00,579 --> 00:38:04,783
Of unregulated
artistic impulse.
817
00:38:04,816 --> 00:38:07,018
In the well-Lit
corner,
818
00:38:07,052 --> 00:38:08,454
The vicious circle
819
00:38:08,487 --> 00:38:10,656
Of the hotel
algonquin.
820
00:38:12,057 --> 00:38:13,191
Algonquin.
821
00:38:13,224 --> 00:38:14,960
And in the darkened
corner,
822
00:38:14,993 --> 00:38:16,395
Well, the sort
of thing
823
00:38:16,428 --> 00:38:19,030
One usually finds in
a darkened corner.
824
00:38:19,064 --> 00:38:21,767
Tonight,
the no-Walkout rule
825
00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:23,569
Will be in effect,
826
00:38:23,602 --> 00:38:25,504
And our judges
this evening
827
00:38:25,537 --> 00:38:27,973
Will be your trampled
sensitivities.
828
00:38:28,006 --> 00:38:30,842
We shall be quite vulgar
and unduly exhibitionist,
829
00:38:30,876 --> 00:38:34,312
Chief characteristic
distinguishing man from beast,
830
00:38:34,346 --> 00:38:38,249
And so now, as usual,
we'll shoot ourselves.
831
00:38:45,090 --> 00:38:48,594
* we got the blues
832
00:38:48,627 --> 00:38:52,564
* we believe we said before
we got the blues *
833
00:38:52,598 --> 00:38:56,034
* they're little flappers,
never growin' up *
834
00:38:56,067 --> 00:38:59,538
* and they've all been flappin'
since belasco was a pup *
835
00:38:59,571 --> 00:39:00,972
* we got the blues
836
00:39:01,006 --> 00:39:02,073
* they've got the blues
837
00:39:02,107 --> 00:39:03,341
* we got the blues...
838
00:39:03,375 --> 00:39:05,076
Didn't know
you played.
839
00:39:05,110 --> 00:39:07,045
Yes. That was
my execution.
840
00:39:07,078 --> 00:39:09,648
* we got the blues
841
00:39:09,681 --> 00:39:13,051
* i'm an ingenue,
and i've got the blues *
842
00:39:13,084 --> 00:39:16,755
* as everyone
can plainly see *
843
00:39:16,788 --> 00:39:20,559
* it's 'cause an ingenue
must promise to *
844
00:39:20,592 --> 00:39:23,829
* imprison
her virginity *
845
00:39:23,862 --> 00:39:28,266
* i check my maidenhead
in my producer's bed *
846
00:39:28,299 --> 00:39:31,970
* oh, gosh, i guess
the joke's on me *
847
00:39:32,003 --> 00:39:33,071
* we got the blues...
848
00:39:33,104 --> 00:39:34,540
They're extremely depressed,
849
00:39:34,573 --> 00:39:37,375
And there's nothing
that i can do about it.
850
00:39:37,409 --> 00:39:40,111
Ah, the prodigal bum
has returned.
851
00:39:40,145 --> 00:39:41,413
How's it going?
852
00:39:41,447 --> 00:39:44,282
Why are you
writing numbers?
853
00:39:44,315 --> 00:39:45,517
Mmm. My report.
854
00:39:45,551 --> 00:39:47,185
Report? What about
the sketch, man?
855
00:39:47,218 --> 00:39:47,786
Your sketch.
856
00:39:47,819 --> 00:39:48,754
Sketch?
857
00:39:48,787 --> 00:39:50,321
Your sketch.
You're next. You're on.
858
00:39:50,355 --> 00:39:51,723
You wanted an account
of the finances.
859
00:39:51,757 --> 00:39:53,825
That's what connelly
told me.
860
00:39:53,859 --> 00:39:55,827
Don't point the scinger
of forn at me, benchley.
861
00:39:55,861 --> 00:39:56,828
Dorothy...
862
00:39:56,862 --> 00:39:57,696
If you want to drink,
ruin your life...
863
00:39:57,729 --> 00:39:58,664
Share this.
864
00:39:58,697 --> 00:40:00,832
Your friend's in need
of inspiration.
865
00:40:00,866 --> 00:40:03,401
Liquor makes people
behave unlike themselves.
866
00:40:03,435 --> 00:40:04,936
Why would you
want people
867
00:40:04,970 --> 00:40:06,304
To behave
like themselves?
868
00:40:06,337 --> 00:40:07,839
Well,
in your case, i...
869
00:40:07,873 --> 00:40:09,508
Ahem.
870
00:40:12,410 --> 00:40:16,982
It's like
a train station.
871
00:40:17,015 --> 00:40:18,283
Don't look at me
872
00:40:18,316 --> 00:40:20,285
In that tone of voice,
mr. Benchley.
873
00:40:20,318 --> 00:40:21,987
May i see that,
please?
874
00:40:22,020 --> 00:40:23,121
Thank you.
875
00:40:23,154 --> 00:40:24,623
Oh, it's
my uncle albert.
876
00:40:24,656 --> 00:40:26,391
That's exactly
how he smelled.
877
00:40:26,424 --> 00:40:27,258
What's
it taste like?
878
00:40:27,292 --> 00:40:29,160
Like it smells.
879
00:40:29,194 --> 00:40:30,395
Now, give it here.
880
00:40:30,428 --> 00:40:32,330
I won't be the cause
of your corruption.
881
00:40:32,363 --> 00:40:33,899
My corruption?
882
00:40:33,932 --> 00:40:35,400
Two minutes,
you're on.
883
00:40:35,433 --> 00:40:38,169
Come along and hold me up,
mrs. Parker.
884
00:40:39,337 --> 00:40:40,839
* never growing up
885
00:40:40,872 --> 00:40:43,609
* and we've all been flapping
since belasco was a pup *
886
00:40:43,642 --> 00:40:45,143
* we got the blues
887
00:40:45,176 --> 00:40:46,444
They've got
the blues.
888
00:40:46,478 --> 00:40:47,813
* we got the blues...
889
00:40:47,846 --> 00:40:49,815
Too bad eddie
didn't stick around.
890
00:40:49,848 --> 00:40:53,485
He likes leg
and fanny numbers.
891
00:40:53,519 --> 00:40:56,187
He went back
to hartford?
892
00:40:56,221 --> 00:40:59,290
And it was all
going so well.
893
00:40:59,324 --> 00:41:00,959
*...blues *
894
00:41:00,992 --> 00:41:03,862
* copeland and connelly,
connelly and copeland *
895
00:41:03,895 --> 00:41:06,397
* the playwrights
of the prairie *
896
00:41:06,431 --> 00:41:08,500
Hey, girls, how'd you like
to be in a show?
897
00:41:08,534 --> 00:41:09,801
Yeah!
Yeah!
898
00:41:09,835 --> 00:41:13,404
All right, let's go back
to the dressing room
899
00:41:13,438 --> 00:41:14,673
And, uh, talk.
900
00:41:14,706 --> 00:41:15,874
What's funny
is a laugh
901
00:41:15,907 --> 00:41:17,475
Wrapped inside a fact.
That's funny.
902
00:41:17,509 --> 00:41:18,476
That's funny.
903
00:41:18,510 --> 00:41:19,611
That would
be some of
904
00:41:19,645 --> 00:41:21,580
Our mrs. Parker's
unprintable verse.
905
00:41:21,613 --> 00:41:23,214
Come on. Come on.
906
00:41:23,248 --> 00:41:25,083
You're in a broadway
theater now.
907
00:41:25,116 --> 00:41:26,985
Behave yourself.
908
00:41:27,018 --> 00:41:29,254
Careful, please!
909
00:41:31,322 --> 00:41:33,358
Oh, careful
of the tomatoes.
910
00:41:33,391 --> 00:41:35,060
Wonderful!
Wonderful!
911
00:41:35,093 --> 00:41:36,728
New careers
for everyone.
912
00:41:36,762 --> 00:41:38,063
Very nice.
913
00:41:42,801 --> 00:41:44,670
It's an obsession
with women's clothing.
914
00:41:44,703 --> 00:41:45,904
Oh, you look wonderful.
915
00:41:45,937 --> 00:41:48,540
Jane, listen,
i can't go to this party.
916
00:41:48,574 --> 00:41:50,108
Please,
can we not go?
917
00:41:50,141 --> 00:41:51,877
Get out of my way,
ross.
918
00:41:51,910 --> 00:41:53,211
I'm here with
someone with talent.
919
00:41:53,244 --> 00:41:54,746
Oh!
920
00:41:54,780 --> 00:41:58,850
Thank you, mr. Sherwood
and your lovely companions.
921
00:41:58,884 --> 00:42:01,119
Certainly, "he who gets flapped"
922
00:42:01,152 --> 00:42:05,256
Loses nothing in its translation
from the original russian.
923
00:42:05,290 --> 00:42:06,592
And now,
924
00:42:06,625 --> 00:42:09,895
It is with a great sense
of mystery that i...
925
00:42:09,928 --> 00:42:12,097
Try to pay attention,
mrs. Parker.
926
00:42:12,130 --> 00:42:13,331
Don't break a leg.
927
00:42:13,364 --> 00:42:14,532
Mr. Robert benchley...
928
00:42:14,566 --> 00:42:15,533
I'll enter
from the trenches.
929
00:42:15,567 --> 00:42:17,769
And his report.
930
00:42:32,050 --> 00:42:33,719
I shall, uh,
931
00:42:33,752 --> 00:42:36,755
Take but a very few moments
of your time this evening.
932
00:42:36,788 --> 00:42:38,123
I realize
that you'd much rather
933
00:42:38,156 --> 00:42:42,628
Be listening to
this interesting entertainment
934
00:42:42,661 --> 00:42:44,963
Than to a dry
financial report.
935
00:42:44,996 --> 00:42:46,665
Ahem.
936
00:42:46,698 --> 00:42:49,067
But, uh, i am reminded
of a story
937
00:42:49,100 --> 00:42:52,671
Which you have probably,
all of you, heard.
938
00:42:52,704 --> 00:42:55,506
Uh, it seems that there were
these two irishmen
939
00:42:55,540 --> 00:42:57,743
Walking down the street,
940
00:42:57,776 --> 00:43:00,245
But when they came up...
They came to a...
941
00:43:00,278 --> 00:43:02,180
Oh, i should have said that
in the first place,
942
00:43:02,213 --> 00:43:08,119
That the store belonging to
the irish...The first irishman...
943
00:43:08,153 --> 00:43:10,188
The first fella's store...
944
00:43:13,358 --> 00:43:15,526
Uh, well, anyway...
945
00:43:15,560 --> 00:43:17,996
The, uh, parrot...
946
00:43:21,767 --> 00:43:23,568
Now, in connection
with reading this report,
947
00:43:23,601 --> 00:43:25,136
There are one or two points
948
00:43:25,170 --> 00:43:27,639
Dr. Murnie wanted brought up
in connection with it,
949
00:43:27,673 --> 00:43:30,441
And he has asked me
to bring them up in...
950
00:43:30,475 --> 00:43:31,276
To bring them up.
951
00:43:32,143 --> 00:43:33,378
The first is in regard
952
00:43:33,411 --> 00:43:35,446
To the work that
we are trying to do
953
00:43:35,480 --> 00:43:37,582
At our little place
at silver lake...
954
00:43:37,615 --> 00:43:38,884
A work that we feel
955
00:43:38,917 --> 00:43:40,518
Not only fills
a very definite need
956
00:43:40,551 --> 00:43:42,120
In the community,
957
00:43:42,153 --> 00:43:45,423
But also fills
a very definite need...
958
00:43:45,456 --> 00:43:47,025
In the community.
959
00:43:47,058 --> 00:43:48,393
Ahem.
960
00:43:48,426 --> 00:43:50,361
Uh, the...i don't think
961
00:43:50,395 --> 00:43:53,498
Many of our members
of our society
962
00:43:53,531 --> 00:43:54,933
Realize just how big
the work is
963
00:43:54,966 --> 00:43:56,634
We're trying to do
up there.
964
00:43:56,668 --> 00:43:58,503
For instance,
i don't think it's generally known
965
00:43:58,536 --> 00:43:59,905
That most
of our boys
966
00:43:59,938 --> 00:44:01,973
Are between
the age of 14.
967
00:44:03,241 --> 00:44:07,478
Uh, we feel that by taking
the boy at this age,
968
00:44:07,512 --> 00:44:10,548
We can get closer
to his real nature,
969
00:44:10,581 --> 00:44:13,451
And a boy has
a very real nature,
970
00:44:13,484 --> 00:44:15,620
You may be sure.
971
00:44:15,653 --> 00:44:17,989
Dottie, i'd like you
to meet
972
00:44:18,023 --> 00:44:20,591
My new discovery...
Baby vomit.
973
00:44:20,625 --> 00:44:22,393
Beware,
her lacy sleeve
974
00:44:22,427 --> 00:44:23,428
Has a bottle
of vitriol
975
00:44:23,461 --> 00:44:24,830
Concealed
in its folds.
976
00:44:24,863 --> 00:44:25,596
Get a load
of this guy.
977
00:44:25,630 --> 00:44:27,132
Blows into tony's
978
00:44:27,165 --> 00:44:29,835
Like something cut loose
from the macy's day parade,
979
00:44:29,868 --> 00:44:32,537
Brings me here to meet
one of my favorite writers,
980
00:44:32,570 --> 00:44:34,372
Forgets my name.
981
00:44:34,405 --> 00:44:36,241
Well, it's charles.
Charlie.
982
00:44:36,274 --> 00:44:37,943
Charlie macarthur.
983
00:44:37,976 --> 00:44:39,144
Pleased to meet you,
mr. Vomit.
984
00:44:45,683 --> 00:44:48,820
charlie's new
at the american.
985
00:44:48,854 --> 00:44:50,388
Very amusing fellow
from chicago
986
00:44:50,421 --> 00:44:51,857
With theatrical
ambitions.
987
00:44:51,890 --> 00:44:53,058
I thought i'd
lay him at your feet
988
00:44:53,091 --> 00:44:54,592
Like the faithful
retriever i am.
989
00:44:54,625 --> 00:44:56,061
Bad dog, aleck.
990
00:44:56,094 --> 00:44:58,830
I heard your husband
might be away.
991
00:44:58,864 --> 00:45:00,165
Well, his wife's
in chicago.
992
00:45:00,198 --> 00:45:03,334
Do you meddle in all your friends'
sex lives
993
00:45:03,368 --> 00:45:05,470
Just because
they have them?
994
00:45:05,503 --> 00:45:06,938
I knew
you'd be pleased.
995
00:45:06,972 --> 00:45:10,441
Now, it seems to me
that the people who criti...
996
00:45:10,475 --> 00:45:12,510
Why, criticize, that, uh...
997
00:45:14,345 --> 00:45:16,414
The, uh, the people who...
998
00:45:16,447 --> 00:45:18,149
Why, as a matter of fact,
999
00:45:18,183 --> 00:45:22,420
It was done just as, uh,
economically as...
1000
00:45:22,453 --> 00:45:24,189
As is possible.
1001
00:45:24,222 --> 00:45:25,991
Even more so.
1002
00:45:28,226 --> 00:45:31,062
Mr. Rossiter, uh,
unfortunately,
1003
00:45:31,096 --> 00:45:33,464
Our treasurer...
1004
00:45:33,498 --> 00:45:34,866
Uh...
1005
00:45:34,900 --> 00:45:37,102
Mr. Rossiter, our treasurer,
1006
00:45:37,135 --> 00:45:41,472
Unfortunately is confined
to his home
1007
00:45:41,506 --> 00:45:43,775
With a bad head cold,
1008
00:45:43,809 --> 00:45:46,978
And, uh, i, uh...
1009
00:45:47,012 --> 00:45:48,980
Excuse me.
1010
00:45:49,014 --> 00:45:50,315
Ahem.
1011
00:45:54,352 --> 00:45:56,654
Oh.
1012
00:45:56,687 --> 00:45:58,523
Well...
1013
00:45:58,556 --> 00:46:01,026
The joke seems to be
on me.
1014
00:46:01,059 --> 00:46:03,128
Mr. Rossiter has pneumonia.
1015
00:46:04,462 --> 00:46:06,264
Who is this guy?
1016
00:46:06,297 --> 00:46:08,166
robert benchley,
life magazine.
1017
00:46:08,199 --> 00:46:10,836
That's benchley,
the drama critic?
1018
00:46:10,869 --> 00:46:12,237
Mm-Hmm.
A saint.
1019
00:46:12,270 --> 00:46:13,872
A saint,
no less.
1020
00:46:13,905 --> 00:46:14,772
Well, it's
a good thing
1021
00:46:14,806 --> 00:46:16,007
He's so goddamn
funny.
1022
00:46:16,041 --> 00:46:17,475
Yes, it is.
It's a goddamn good thing.
1023
00:46:17,508 --> 00:46:18,643
Aleck.
1024
00:46:18,676 --> 00:46:19,811
What, ruth?
1025
00:46:19,845 --> 00:46:21,012
We're next.
1026
00:46:21,046 --> 00:46:22,713
Don't worry.
Calm down, ruth.
1027
00:46:22,747 --> 00:46:25,650
The treasurer's,
uh, report.
1028
00:46:34,592 --> 00:46:36,427
He was the best
thing in the show,
1029
00:46:36,461 --> 00:46:38,663
So into my column
he goes.
1030
00:46:38,696 --> 00:46:40,231
Robert is a writer,
not an actor.
1031
00:46:40,265 --> 00:46:42,667
Besides, he would never
have time for performing,
1032
00:46:42,700 --> 00:46:46,204
What with myself,
the boys, and his job.
1033
00:46:46,237 --> 00:46:47,605
As it is,
he's got to be careful
1034
00:46:47,638 --> 00:46:49,807
He doesn't work himself
into the ground.
1035
00:46:49,841 --> 00:46:51,376
I've seen it happen
before, gertrude.
1036
00:46:51,409 --> 00:46:53,578
Never underestimate
the power of applause.
1037
00:46:53,611 --> 00:46:57,082
Marc, from one's self
expect applause.
1038
00:46:57,115 --> 00:46:59,084
He noblest lives
and noblest dies...
1039
00:46:59,117 --> 00:47:01,086
Help me.
Help me, mrs. Parker.
1040
00:47:01,119 --> 00:47:03,088
Well, irving berlin
and sam harris...
1041
00:47:03,121 --> 00:47:05,156
Right behind you,
directly behind you...
1042
00:47:05,190 --> 00:47:07,358
Want me
and the treasurer's report
1043
00:47:07,392 --> 00:47:09,294
To be in their next revue.
1044
00:47:09,327 --> 00:47:10,728
Oh, how do you do?
1045
00:47:10,761 --> 00:47:13,531
Uh, ahem.
It seems that, well, i...I...I...
1046
00:47:13,564 --> 00:47:15,066
I...I...I...
1047
00:47:16,334 --> 00:47:18,603
I couldn't justify
a critic like myself being...
1048
00:47:18,636 --> 00:47:20,305
Well, having a paid job
on stage...
1049
00:47:20,338 --> 00:47:23,374
But i didn't want to offend them
and say no,
1050
00:47:23,408 --> 00:47:26,611
So i asked for $500,
and i thought they'd just laugh,
1051
00:47:26,644 --> 00:47:28,279
And the next thing i know,
1052
00:47:28,313 --> 00:47:30,348
Harris is gleaming at me
with those...
1053
00:47:30,381 --> 00:47:32,951
And saying, "for $500,
you better be awfully good."
1054
00:47:32,984 --> 00:47:36,054
I'm a bit flustered.
I guess we'll see what happens.
1055
00:47:36,087 --> 00:47:37,688
Congratulations.
I'm charles macarthur.
1056
00:47:37,722 --> 00:47:39,624
How do you do?
I'm robert benchley.
1057
00:47:39,657 --> 00:47:40,926
I'm so sorry.
1058
00:47:40,959 --> 00:47:43,428
Excuse me. I have to
tell my wife.
1059
00:47:43,461 --> 00:47:44,862
Excuse me, gertrude.
1060
00:47:44,896 --> 00:47:46,631
Would you
like a drink
1061
00:47:46,664 --> 00:47:48,366
Before
kissing me?
1062
00:47:53,638 --> 00:47:54,906
Yes.
1063
00:47:54,940 --> 00:47:57,242
If i don't drive
around the park,
1064
00:47:57,275 --> 00:48:00,145
I'm pretty sure
to make my mark.
1065
00:48:00,178 --> 00:48:03,915
If i'm in bed
each night by 10:00,
1066
00:48:03,949 --> 00:48:08,553
I may get back
my looks again.
1067
00:48:08,586 --> 00:48:13,124
If i abstain
from fun and such,
1068
00:48:13,158 --> 00:48:17,495
I'll probably
amount to much,
1069
00:48:17,528 --> 00:48:22,633
But i shall stay
the way i am,
1070
00:48:22,667 --> 00:48:25,636
Because i do not
give a damn.
1071
00:48:25,670 --> 00:48:27,638
Tim and i
a-Hunting went,
1072
00:48:27,672 --> 00:48:29,540
Spied three women
in a tent.
1073
00:48:29,574 --> 00:48:31,176
They being three,
we being two,
1074
00:48:31,209 --> 00:48:34,612
I bucked one,
and tim bucked two.
1075
00:48:34,645 --> 00:48:37,348
Oh, here's
bobby's station.
1076
00:48:38,984 --> 00:48:41,987
One man's descent
into hell,
1077
00:48:42,020 --> 00:48:43,854
Where we're all
waiting for you.
1078
00:48:43,888 --> 00:48:44,689
Say hello
to my father,
1079
00:48:44,722 --> 00:48:45,957
Will you, rob?
1080
00:48:47,058 --> 00:48:48,659
If i can find him.
1081
00:48:53,631 --> 00:48:55,666
This place
ought to be closed
1082
00:48:55,700 --> 00:48:57,168
By law.
1083
00:48:57,202 --> 00:48:58,669
Ha ha ha!
1084
00:49:00,005 --> 00:49:01,672
And thank you.
1085
00:49:01,706 --> 00:49:03,708
That's what
i thought you'd say.
1086
00:49:03,741 --> 00:49:05,543
Rob, how do you
feel?
1087
00:49:05,576 --> 00:49:07,712
How do i feel? I...
1088
00:49:07,745 --> 00:49:11,682
I must say, i...
feel like an angel.
1089
00:49:11,716 --> 00:49:12,984
Ha ha!
1090
00:49:13,018 --> 00:49:14,352
Some friendly
advice, benchley.
1091
00:49:14,385 --> 00:49:16,821
The best way
to avoid a hangover
1092
00:49:16,854 --> 00:49:17,989
Is to stay drunk.
1093
00:49:18,023 --> 00:49:18,823
How does a
sophisticated gentleman
1094
00:49:18,856 --> 00:49:20,125
Know when he's drunk?
1095
00:49:20,158 --> 00:49:23,428
When he can't pronounce
sophisticated anymore.
1096
00:49:23,461 --> 00:49:24,695
Isn't she adorable?
1097
00:49:24,729 --> 00:49:25,830
She's delirious.
1098
00:49:25,863 --> 00:49:27,765
That's why
she's adorable.
1099
00:49:27,798 --> 00:49:30,301
Well, to get back to me,
1100
00:49:30,335 --> 00:49:32,303
I was wondering how
it could have been
1101
00:49:32,337 --> 00:49:36,541
So awful
drinking with eddie
1102
00:49:36,574 --> 00:49:38,076
And so much fun
1103
00:49:38,109 --> 00:49:40,878
Drinking
with all of you.
1104
00:49:40,911 --> 00:49:44,249
Is that
a loaded question?
1105
00:49:44,282 --> 00:49:45,983
Because you're
married to him.
1106
00:49:46,017 --> 00:49:47,085
Might be more fun
1107
00:49:47,118 --> 00:49:48,786
Sleeping with
somebody else, too.
1108
00:49:48,819 --> 00:49:49,820
Ahem.
1109
00:49:49,854 --> 00:49:51,156
Oh, dear, dear,
1110
00:49:51,189 --> 00:49:54,025
Is the, um, subject
in danger of turning to sex?
1111
00:49:54,059 --> 00:49:55,360
no more than usual.
1112
00:49:55,393 --> 00:49:57,328
Because we wouldn't
want charlie here
1113
00:49:57,362 --> 00:49:59,664
To think that's all
we ever talk about.
1114
00:49:59,697 --> 00:50:01,032
Don't look now, toots,
1115
00:50:01,066 --> 00:50:03,534
But no matter how much
you talk about sex,
1116
00:50:03,568 --> 00:50:06,037
You never know how
the other fellow does it.
1117
00:50:06,071 --> 00:50:08,539
Why would you
want to know that?
1118
00:50:08,573 --> 00:50:09,874
Well, you would know
1119
00:50:09,907 --> 00:50:12,310
If you were
an experienced woman,
1120
00:50:12,343 --> 00:50:16,114
But of course, it would be
bad manners to tell,
1121
00:50:16,147 --> 00:50:17,715
Now, wouldn't it?
1122
00:50:22,887 --> 00:50:27,625
Cops are here.
Everybody speak easy.
1123
00:50:27,658 --> 00:50:29,627
Through
the kitchen.
1124
00:50:39,537 --> 00:50:41,406
This way.
1125
00:50:42,473 --> 00:50:44,475
all right, everybody.
1126
00:50:44,509 --> 00:50:45,876
Settle down.
1127
00:50:45,910 --> 00:50:48,179
We're going to take
a little ride.
1128
00:50:48,213 --> 00:50:50,215
One at a time.
Come on.
1129
00:50:50,248 --> 00:50:52,750
You're coming with us
this evening.
1130
00:50:52,783 --> 00:50:54,619
nice faces.
1131
00:50:54,652 --> 00:50:56,621
Lovely hats,
too.
1132
00:50:57,755 --> 00:50:59,324
Put your drink
away!
1133
00:50:59,357 --> 00:51:02,160
ha ha! This is
wonderful!
1134
00:51:03,728 --> 00:51:05,796
Oh, shit! I left
my purse inside.
1135
00:51:05,830 --> 00:51:07,798
That's all right.
They'll return it...
1136
00:51:07,832 --> 00:51:09,800
Federal good manners
act and all.
1137
00:51:09,834 --> 00:51:11,802
Wait here.
I excel at this.
1138
00:51:11,836 --> 00:51:13,504
What?
1139
00:51:18,576 --> 00:51:22,413
Press. The american.
Mind if i take a look?
1140
00:51:22,447 --> 00:51:24,915
This fella conks me
on the head,
1141
00:51:24,949 --> 00:51:26,617
And thus goes
my heart.
1142
00:51:26,651 --> 00:51:28,219
Ah, love
conks her all.
1143
00:51:28,253 --> 00:51:30,888
He's wild and mad
and fleet.
1144
00:51:30,921 --> 00:51:33,124
I may have him
mounted.
1145
00:51:33,158 --> 00:51:34,759
Yes, one would
assume.
1146
00:51:49,874 --> 00:51:51,209
Philip.
1147
00:51:53,744 --> 00:51:54,945
Here we are.
1148
00:51:54,979 --> 00:51:56,281
Taxi.
1149
00:51:56,314 --> 00:51:57,782
i'm engaged.
1150
00:51:57,815 --> 00:51:59,217
he's engaged.
1151
00:51:59,250 --> 00:52:01,352
you are? Then be happy.
Congratulations.
1152
00:52:01,386 --> 00:52:03,321
lousy new yorker.
Lousy goddamn...
1153
00:52:03,354 --> 00:52:05,390
gentlemen! Would you
strike this man?
1154
00:52:05,423 --> 00:52:07,858
want to do something
about it, pip-Squeak?
1155
00:52:07,892 --> 00:52:09,327
New york
will be deprived
1156
00:52:09,360 --> 00:52:11,462
Of its annual gilbert
and sullivan revival,
1157
00:52:11,496 --> 00:52:12,530
I think.
1158
00:52:12,563 --> 00:52:14,432
the hell with him.
Let's walk.
1159
00:52:14,465 --> 00:52:15,833
Nice meeting you,
however.
1160
00:52:15,866 --> 00:52:18,303
I love the rain.
1161
00:52:18,336 --> 00:52:20,070
My place is
closest, sister.
1162
00:52:20,104 --> 00:52:21,339
Just missed
my last train.
1163
00:52:21,372 --> 00:52:22,173
I guess
i'm coming, too.
1164
00:52:22,207 --> 00:52:24,375
I'm a late
sleeper.
1165
00:52:24,409 --> 00:52:26,177
I'll be sure
to boil my eggs gently
1166
00:52:26,211 --> 00:52:27,245
And not scrape
my toast.
1167
00:52:27,278 --> 00:52:28,446
Hello. Excuse me.
1168
00:52:28,479 --> 00:52:31,782
Hey, wait, there.
47th and 7th, please.
1169
00:52:31,816 --> 00:52:33,651
Thank you very much.
1170
00:52:38,889 --> 00:52:40,391
Thank you.
1171
00:52:42,092 --> 00:52:43,928
hello.
1172
00:52:43,961 --> 00:52:45,396
Oh.
1173
00:52:47,898 --> 00:52:49,400
Hello.
1174
00:52:51,402 --> 00:52:53,871
Thank you
for the robe.
1175
00:52:53,904 --> 00:52:55,406
Cheers.
1176
00:52:57,475 --> 00:53:00,077
My apartment
is shamefully undeveloped
1177
00:53:00,110 --> 00:53:01,379
Compared to yours.
1178
00:53:01,412 --> 00:53:04,081
Ah, well, a friend
helped me
1179
00:53:04,114 --> 00:53:05,450
Fix up the place.
1180
00:53:05,483 --> 00:53:07,918
I should say
a few friends.
1181
00:53:10,421 --> 00:53:13,090
Oh, do you enjoy
swinburne?
1182
00:53:13,123 --> 00:53:16,394
Look...before you start
analyzing my books,
1183
00:53:16,427 --> 00:53:19,096
There's something
i should clear up.
1184
00:53:19,129 --> 00:53:21,432
You didn't pick
them out, either.
1185
00:53:23,033 --> 00:53:24,134
I lied
when i told you
1186
00:53:24,168 --> 00:53:27,438
You were one
of my favorite writers.
1187
00:53:34,144 --> 00:53:36,447
And i lied
when i smiled.
1188
00:53:38,649 --> 00:53:41,118
It's just that i've read
more about you...
1189
00:53:41,151 --> 00:53:43,788
What dorothy parker
thinks of this or that...
1190
00:53:43,821 --> 00:53:45,456
Than your actual writing.
1191
00:53:47,191 --> 00:53:49,494
Not counting the fluff,
of course.
1192
00:53:50,828 --> 00:53:52,497
Fluff pays the rent.
1193
00:53:54,164 --> 00:53:56,934
Yeah, but if i were you,
i'd be worried.
1194
00:53:56,967 --> 00:53:58,603
Oh, how dare you?
1195
00:53:58,636 --> 00:54:00,471
How dare you?
1196
00:54:02,673 --> 00:54:03,808
Come.
1197
00:54:03,841 --> 00:54:04,475
What?
1198
00:54:04,509 --> 00:54:05,276
Come here.
1199
00:54:05,310 --> 00:54:06,511
What, i'm
supposed to worry
1200
00:54:06,544 --> 00:54:09,380
Because a self-Confessed
liar and sycophant
1201
00:54:09,414 --> 00:54:11,115
Whose place
looks like it's been
1202
00:54:11,148 --> 00:54:12,850
Decorated
by the junior league
1203
00:54:12,883 --> 00:54:14,685
Tells me to?
1204
00:54:14,719 --> 00:54:16,987
That's right.
1205
00:54:17,021 --> 00:54:19,056
I'm not going
in there.
1206
00:54:19,089 --> 00:54:21,158
Why?
1207
00:54:21,191 --> 00:54:22,960
Because i've read
my share.
1208
00:54:22,993 --> 00:54:24,662
Oh, really?
1209
00:54:24,695 --> 00:54:26,163
Yeah.
1210
00:54:26,196 --> 00:54:28,433
Well, did you know
that i sold a short story
1211
00:54:28,466 --> 00:54:30,768
That took months
to write?
1212
00:54:30,801 --> 00:54:32,202
That's, um...
1213
00:54:32,236 --> 00:54:35,105
Fiction,
for your information.
1214
00:54:35,139 --> 00:54:37,742
My low brow is not
congenital, dot.
1215
00:54:37,775 --> 00:54:39,310
I saw it.
1216
00:54:39,344 --> 00:54:41,946
About a henpecked husband
living in the suburbs...
1217
00:54:41,979 --> 00:54:44,382
Seemed a lot like
benchley.
1218
00:54:55,393 --> 00:54:57,328
Now, don't be mad.
1219
00:54:57,362 --> 00:54:58,863
Dream bigger.
1220
00:55:00,565 --> 00:55:01,732
Like you?
1221
00:55:01,766 --> 00:55:04,201
Yeah, like me.
1222
00:55:04,234 --> 00:55:06,537
And you're going to
help, i suppose.
1223
00:55:06,571 --> 00:55:09,239
Sure.
Whatever you want.
1224
00:55:09,273 --> 00:55:10,741
It could be...
1225
00:55:10,775 --> 00:55:12,543
One of
the very best.
1226
00:55:12,577 --> 00:55:15,513
I think you'd want
to find out.
1227
00:55:16,581 --> 00:55:19,550
This must be some sort
of sophisticated
1228
00:55:19,584 --> 00:55:23,488
Midwestern
farm-Boy routine.
1229
00:55:23,521 --> 00:55:25,022
Uh...what's my line?
1230
00:55:25,055 --> 00:55:26,290
You want to hitch up
a mule...
1231
00:55:26,323 --> 00:55:28,258
For a little person,
you talk an awful lot.
1232
00:55:28,292 --> 00:55:29,927
...and plow
my fertile fields?
1233
00:56:57,548 --> 00:57:00,551
No, but i'm glad
you're by the book.
1234
00:57:04,388 --> 00:57:06,857
I felt we were
pretty good together
1235
00:57:06,891 --> 00:57:08,125
For the first time.
1236
00:57:08,158 --> 00:57:10,194
I guess adultery
takes practice.
1237
00:57:13,698 --> 00:57:15,933
Double adultery
cancels itself out.
1238
00:57:18,402 --> 00:57:20,004
Questionable logic,
1239
00:57:20,037 --> 00:57:21,706
But i like
the theory.
1240
00:57:23,708 --> 00:57:26,677
What does your wife
think about it?
1241
00:57:26,711 --> 00:57:30,147
Ah...don't worry
about her.
1242
00:57:30,180 --> 00:57:31,682
We're clean.
1243
00:57:33,083 --> 00:57:34,318
Mmm.
1244
00:57:34,351 --> 00:57:37,221
How can you wake up
so beautiful?
1245
00:57:40,224 --> 00:57:42,392
Oh, charlie.
1246
00:57:42,426 --> 00:57:45,896
I'm going to wear
my heart on my sleeve
1247
00:57:45,930 --> 00:57:48,733
Like a wet, red stain.
1248
00:58:11,455 --> 00:58:13,223
A runaway train
colliding.
1249
00:58:13,257 --> 00:58:16,426
You knew it was dangerous
when you introduced them.
1250
00:58:16,460 --> 00:58:18,929
Cupid is judged on precision,
not perils.
1251
00:58:18,963 --> 00:58:20,430
Don't look now, toots,
1252
00:58:20,464 --> 00:58:23,433
But this is the one
she's been waiting for.
1253
00:58:23,467 --> 00:58:25,770
Oh, it's a little
something for woodrow.
1254
00:58:29,774 --> 00:58:31,709
We're engaged,
everybody.
1255
00:58:32,977 --> 00:58:34,779
Dorothy's dog
and i.
1256
00:58:37,314 --> 00:58:38,649
Sit.
1257
00:58:40,484 --> 00:58:41,952
Keep it down,
everybody.
1258
00:58:43,688 --> 00:58:46,957
...the bombs exploding
all around me.
1259
00:58:49,126 --> 00:58:50,895
I was overcome
with a...
1260
00:58:50,928 --> 00:58:52,963
A powerful feeling
of optimism.
1261
00:58:54,098 --> 00:58:55,232
So i said to myself,
1262
00:58:55,265 --> 00:58:58,803
"Macarthur, this is
the lowest point in your life.
1263
00:58:58,836 --> 00:59:01,538
From here on, everything
will be an improvement."
1264
00:59:08,012 --> 00:59:09,313
Get more.
1265
00:59:15,986 --> 00:59:17,521
Queen's bet.
1266
00:59:17,554 --> 00:59:19,624
I don't know how wonderful
they are together.
1267
00:59:19,657 --> 00:59:21,125
They're
an ideal couple.
1268
00:59:21,158 --> 00:59:23,427
Macarthur's got a terrific
head on his shoulders.
1269
00:59:23,460 --> 00:59:25,129
Yeah,
and a different one each night.
1270
00:59:25,162 --> 00:59:28,365
I remind you,
there are two sides to mistress dorothy.
1271
00:59:28,398 --> 00:59:30,500
Offensive
and defensive.
1272
00:59:30,534 --> 00:59:32,002
our founder.
1273
00:59:32,036 --> 00:59:32,837
If a man
pursued her,
1274
00:59:32,870 --> 00:59:34,371
She wouldn't
be interested.
1275
00:59:34,404 --> 00:59:35,806
Let that man pursue
another woman,
1276
00:59:35,840 --> 00:59:37,908
She'll fall deliriously
in love with him.
1277
00:59:37,942 --> 00:59:39,176
With claws flashing
and tears falling.
1278
00:59:39,209 --> 00:59:40,611
She's available,
1279
00:59:40,645 --> 00:59:43,513
But she's the goddamndest
fortress at the same time.
1280
00:59:43,547 --> 00:59:45,549
Yeah, a fortress
of cards.
1281
00:59:45,582 --> 00:59:47,618
our founder.
1282
00:59:47,652 --> 00:59:49,720
She really knows
how to suffer.
1283
00:59:49,754 --> 00:59:52,422
The greatest little
runner-Downer there ever was.
1284
00:59:52,456 --> 00:59:53,658
Dottie can't be
suffering
1285
00:59:53,691 --> 00:59:56,694
And still say all
those funny things.
1286
00:59:56,727 --> 00:59:59,463
* there wasn't a soul
to greet me there *
1287
00:59:59,496 --> 01:00:01,666
* a lone stranger
on your shore *
1288
01:00:01,699 --> 01:00:03,968
* but irish luck
was with me there *
1289
01:00:04,001 --> 01:00:07,537
* and wishes came
galore *
1290
01:00:07,571 --> 01:00:09,039
Happy birthday,
dottie.
1291
01:00:09,073 --> 01:00:10,675
Happy birthday,
dot.
1292
01:00:10,708 --> 01:00:13,343
Don't you think 29's
dangerously ripe, darling?
1293
01:00:13,377 --> 01:00:15,045
Nah.
1294
01:00:15,079 --> 01:00:16,881
Just how i like 'em.
1295
01:00:21,585 --> 01:00:23,821
The tide's out.
The table's set.
1296
01:00:23,854 --> 01:00:26,423
Everybody
like clams?
1297
01:00:26,456 --> 01:00:27,391
Mmm.
1298
01:00:27,424 --> 01:00:28,926
Come on, marc.
1299
01:00:28,959 --> 01:00:30,194
Can't we just
whistle for them?
1300
01:00:30,227 --> 01:00:31,595
They don't have ears.
1301
01:00:31,628 --> 01:00:33,363
Grab that.
1302
01:00:35,099 --> 01:00:36,400
Dottie.
1303
01:00:38,368 --> 01:00:39,569
Oh.
1304
01:00:39,603 --> 01:00:41,071
Thank god.
Nobody saw.
1305
01:00:41,105 --> 01:00:42,873
Oh.
1306
01:00:42,907 --> 01:00:44,875
I can't even get
morning sickness
1307
01:00:44,909 --> 01:00:46,576
When you're
supposed to.
1308
01:00:46,610 --> 01:00:48,378
Are you sure?
1309
01:00:48,412 --> 01:00:49,880
Dottie.
1310
01:00:49,914 --> 01:00:52,917
Oh, neyso, i wish
the lord i weren't.
1311
01:01:01,425 --> 01:01:06,596
In april,
1312
01:01:06,630 --> 01:01:09,900
My one love came along,
1313
01:01:09,934 --> 01:01:14,604
And i ran the slope
of my high hill
1314
01:01:14,638 --> 01:01:17,908
To follow
a thread of song.
1315
01:01:17,942 --> 01:01:21,912
His eyes were hard
as porphyry
1316
01:01:21,946 --> 01:01:25,615
With looking
on cruel lands.
1317
01:01:25,649 --> 01:01:28,986
His voice
went slipping over me
1318
01:01:29,019 --> 01:01:32,957
Like terrible silver hands.
1319
01:01:34,591 --> 01:01:38,695
In april,
1320
01:01:38,729 --> 01:01:42,632
My love went whistling by,
1321
01:01:42,666 --> 01:01:46,937
And i stumbled here
to my high hill
1322
01:01:46,971 --> 01:01:50,640
Along the way of a lie.
1323
01:01:50,674 --> 01:01:53,944
Now what should i do
in this place
1324
01:01:53,978 --> 01:01:57,647
But sit
and count the chimes,
1325
01:01:57,681 --> 01:02:01,952
And splash cold water
on my face
1326
01:02:01,986 --> 01:02:06,490
And spoil a page
with rhymes?
1327
01:02:27,778 --> 01:02:29,446
Aw. What happened?
1328
01:02:29,479 --> 01:02:31,015
Did you fall asleep?
1329
01:02:33,717 --> 01:02:35,485
I went two hours
in the theater
1330
01:02:35,519 --> 01:02:37,988
Imagining you were
dead somewhere.
1331
01:02:38,022 --> 01:02:40,657
Oh, jesus christ, dot.
I'm sorry.
1332
01:02:40,690 --> 01:02:42,059
Ah, don't be.
It was more entertaining
1333
01:02:42,092 --> 01:02:44,528
Than the play
i was watching.
1334
01:02:44,561 --> 01:02:46,030
I'll...i'll just
get dressed.
1335
01:02:46,063 --> 01:02:48,698
I gave up on the whole
thing quite early
1336
01:02:48,732 --> 01:02:51,168
And spent most of the
evening on the floor
1337
01:02:51,201 --> 01:02:52,536
As a member of a
volunteer search party
1338
01:02:52,569 --> 01:02:53,904
To aid the lady
on my left
1339
01:02:53,938 --> 01:02:55,806
In retrieving
a missing rubber.
1340
01:02:55,840 --> 01:02:59,043
Oh, i left my lipstick
here yesterday.
1341
01:03:04,748 --> 01:03:07,717
you know, it must be
just as hard
1342
01:03:07,751 --> 01:03:09,719
To get that look right
in life
1343
01:03:09,753 --> 01:03:11,555
As it is onstage.
1344
01:03:15,759 --> 01:03:17,727
Well, someone
has to leave.
1345
01:03:17,761 --> 01:03:19,029
If you ask me,
1346
01:03:19,063 --> 01:03:20,130
It ought to be
the someone
1347
01:03:20,164 --> 01:03:23,233
Who already has
their clothes on,
1348
01:03:23,267 --> 01:03:25,235
But then...
1349
01:03:25,269 --> 01:03:27,571
You're the writers.
1350
01:03:31,275 --> 01:03:33,077
I'm just an actress.
1351
01:03:39,783 --> 01:03:42,052
Dorothy,
cut the theatrics.
1352
01:03:42,086 --> 01:03:44,088
We're both
still married.
1353
01:03:45,789 --> 01:03:48,758
We're in
no position to...
1354
01:03:48,792 --> 01:03:50,760
Look, you know
my situation.
1355
01:03:50,794 --> 01:03:54,764
And you know mine
while you're up.
1356
01:03:54,798 --> 01:03:58,602
I said i'd help take care of it,
and i meant it.
1357
01:04:02,339 --> 01:04:03,908
Here's your lipstick.
1358
01:04:03,941 --> 01:04:06,110
Does the gangplank
need painting?
1359
01:04:09,313 --> 01:04:10,780
Dorothy...
1360
01:04:10,814 --> 01:04:12,782
You know i adore you,
1361
01:04:12,816 --> 01:04:15,785
But i'm not going to
make any excuses.
1362
01:04:15,819 --> 01:04:17,754
Oh, no.
Goodness, no.
1363
01:04:17,787 --> 01:04:20,090
It's all my fault.
Really, it is.
1364
01:04:20,124 --> 01:04:22,792
Well, i wish
i didn't have to go,
1365
01:04:22,826 --> 01:04:24,661
And let's hope i
won't be rushing back
1366
01:04:24,694 --> 01:04:27,431
As fast as my little
legs can carry me.
1367
01:04:27,464 --> 01:04:28,398
I can't tell you
1368
01:04:28,432 --> 01:04:31,168
How much i'll...
miss you.
1369
01:04:32,502 --> 01:04:34,004
Just drive, please.
1370
01:04:43,347 --> 01:04:44,949
Where is he?
1371
01:04:44,982 --> 01:04:47,184
Did he telephone?
1372
01:04:48,685 --> 01:04:50,320
Why am i so cold?
1373
01:04:50,354 --> 01:04:51,821
It's the anesthesia.
1374
01:04:51,855 --> 01:04:53,823
We had to
give you extra.
1375
01:04:53,857 --> 01:04:55,192
You must have been
further along
1376
01:04:55,225 --> 01:04:57,894
Than you told
the doctor.
1377
01:05:10,374 --> 01:05:11,841
Your hangover is going
1378
01:05:11,875 --> 01:05:14,511
Straight to the smithsonian,
mrs. Parker.
1379
01:05:14,544 --> 01:05:17,514
Once it kills me and becomes famous,
you mean.
1380
01:05:17,547 --> 01:05:19,016
Jesus.
Don't say that.
1381
01:05:19,049 --> 01:05:22,686
You know, there's a lesson
for all of us in this.
1382
01:05:22,719 --> 01:05:24,221
What's that,
sherry?
1383
01:05:26,023 --> 01:05:28,158
Well,
i don't know.
1384
01:05:28,192 --> 01:05:30,194
Good night,
everyone.
1385
01:05:31,895 --> 01:05:34,464
Yes, well,
it's getting to be that time,
1386
01:05:34,498 --> 01:05:35,832
Isn't it?
1387
01:05:35,865 --> 01:05:37,367
Coming, dot?
1388
01:05:40,037 --> 01:05:42,206
Time does flit.
1389
01:05:42,239 --> 01:05:43,707
Oh, shit.
1390
01:05:45,409 --> 01:05:47,011
Good night.
1391
01:05:47,044 --> 01:05:48,678
Damn it. My watch
has stopped.
1392
01:05:48,712 --> 01:05:50,247
Oh?
1393
01:05:55,052 --> 01:05:57,254
You wound it
too tightly.
1394
01:05:59,923 --> 01:06:02,026
Perhaps it is in need
of lubrication.
1395
01:06:02,059 --> 01:06:03,727
Let's go wild
tonight!
1396
01:06:03,760 --> 01:06:05,862
There's plenty of
time to do nothing
1397
01:06:05,895 --> 01:06:07,897
Once you're
dead.
1398
01:06:07,931 --> 01:06:09,566
Please don't use
that word.
1399
01:06:09,599 --> 01:06:11,568
What do you say,
mr. Benchley?
1400
01:06:11,601 --> 01:06:13,570
You want to go
wild tonight?
1401
01:06:14,904 --> 01:06:16,573
Thank you.
1402
01:06:16,606 --> 01:06:17,907
Mr. Benchley.
1403
01:06:17,941 --> 01:06:19,243
Mr. Benchley?
1404
01:06:20,777 --> 01:06:21,711
Fred!
1405
01:06:21,745 --> 01:06:23,113
Hmm?
1406
01:06:23,147 --> 01:06:25,682
Oh, perhaps i should
see you home, mrs. P.
1407
01:06:25,715 --> 01:06:28,885
We can recite crossing
the bar along the way.
1408
01:06:28,918 --> 01:06:30,387
What do you think?
1409
01:06:30,420 --> 01:06:34,158
I can't sleep
worth sour apples.
1410
01:06:34,191 --> 01:06:37,927
I keep seeing
these little...
1411
01:06:37,961 --> 01:06:40,230
Hands and feet...
1412
01:06:40,264 --> 01:06:42,666
And a head full
of curly hair,
1413
01:06:42,699 --> 01:06:45,235
Just like charlie's.
1414
01:06:45,269 --> 01:06:47,237
God is standing
over me
1415
01:06:47,271 --> 01:06:50,440
In a doctor's
jacket...
1416
01:06:50,474 --> 01:06:54,044
Shaking his long,
rubber-Gloved finger.
1417
01:06:54,078 --> 01:06:56,946
That's very phallic.
Don't you think?
1418
01:06:56,980 --> 01:07:00,450
But i...I...
can't understand
1419
01:07:00,484 --> 01:07:02,052
What god is saying
1420
01:07:02,086 --> 01:07:05,289
Because he's got a
mask over his face.
1421
01:07:08,158 --> 01:07:10,160
Isn't that
just like him?
1422
01:07:13,297 --> 01:07:16,300
Oh, you poor,
hungry thing.
1423
01:07:21,838 --> 01:07:23,273
All right.
1424
01:07:24,574 --> 01:07:26,276
Up we go.
1425
01:07:28,812 --> 01:07:30,314
Ooh.
1426
01:07:40,957 --> 01:07:42,992
Look, woodrow.
1427
01:07:43,026 --> 01:07:44,994
It's raining.
1428
01:07:45,028 --> 01:07:47,497
We want the rain...
1429
01:07:47,531 --> 01:07:49,499
The wanton rain.
1430
01:07:49,533 --> 01:07:50,834
Ooh.
1431
01:07:53,036 --> 01:07:56,005
Oh, you're simply all...
1432
01:07:56,039 --> 01:07:58,208
Worn-Out, aren't you?
1433
01:08:00,877 --> 01:08:03,012
Just...
1434
01:08:03,046 --> 01:08:05,682
Hungry and worn-Out.
1435
01:08:07,083 --> 01:08:09,253
Well...
1436
01:08:09,286 --> 01:08:12,356
We don't want
to have a breakdown.
1437
01:08:13,890 --> 01:08:15,859
Got to keep you healthy.
1438
01:08:15,892 --> 01:08:17,227
Hmm?
1439
01:08:18,628 --> 01:08:20,530
There you are.
1440
01:08:20,564 --> 01:08:22,366
Mmm.
1441
01:08:28,138 --> 01:08:29,373
There you go, darling.
1442
01:08:31,141 --> 01:08:33,710
A nice dinner for you.
1443
01:08:47,391 --> 01:08:50,059
Oh, hello, johnny.
It's mrs. Parker.
1444
01:08:50,093 --> 01:08:53,062
Yes, i'll be needing you
to deliver up some dinner
1445
01:08:53,096 --> 01:08:54,898
Before theater
tonight, dear.
1446
01:08:56,400 --> 01:08:58,368
Oh, whatever's
the special...
1447
01:08:58,402 --> 01:09:00,570
And a large pot
of coffee.
1448
01:09:00,604 --> 01:09:02,272
Thank you.
1449
01:09:07,611 --> 01:09:09,879
Oh.
1450
01:09:09,913 --> 01:09:11,415
All right.
1451
01:09:28,432 --> 01:09:31,435
Tragedies don't
kill us, woodrow.
1452
01:09:32,869 --> 01:09:34,338
Messes kill us.
1453
01:09:34,371 --> 01:09:37,441
I can't stand
messes.
1454
01:09:38,975 --> 01:09:41,711
Oh, where's
the fucking aspirin?
1455
01:10:27,857 --> 01:10:30,126
The sun's gone dim,
1456
01:10:30,159 --> 01:10:33,630
And the moon's turned
black,
1457
01:10:33,663 --> 01:10:37,434
For i loved him,
and he didn't love back.
1458
01:10:46,676 --> 01:10:49,346
you were a mess
lying there...
1459
01:10:51,881 --> 01:10:52,982
Bleeding
and drooling.
1460
01:10:57,186 --> 01:10:59,856
You were pathetic...
1461
01:10:59,889 --> 01:11:00,990
And disgusting.
1462
01:11:03,192 --> 01:11:05,161
Is that all?
1463
01:11:05,194 --> 01:11:06,996
I only know
15 adjectives.
1464
01:11:10,400 --> 01:11:14,170
You don't have to tie double knots,
mr. Benchley.
1465
01:11:14,203 --> 01:11:17,006
These are not
your son's oxfords.
1466
01:11:23,046 --> 01:11:25,014
Do you still
love me, fred?
1467
01:11:25,048 --> 01:11:27,216
Of course i do,
mrs. Parker.
1468
01:11:27,250 --> 01:11:29,886
But you think
i'm a kill-Joy.
1469
01:11:32,889 --> 01:11:34,624
No, i don't,
1470
01:11:34,658 --> 01:11:37,327
But if you don't eat
more solid foods
1471
01:11:37,361 --> 01:11:38,562
And stay away
from razor blades,
1472
01:11:38,595 --> 01:11:40,764
You could arouse
that suspicion in others.
1473
01:11:43,232 --> 01:11:44,334
I hear mice.
1474
01:11:44,368 --> 01:11:46,035
Shall i
discourage them?
1475
01:11:48,237 --> 01:11:50,039
Do i look...
all right?
1476
01:11:54,243 --> 01:11:56,112
Now you do.
1477
01:11:56,145 --> 01:11:57,581
Come in.
1478
01:12:12,095 --> 01:12:13,229
well...
1479
01:12:13,262 --> 01:12:15,732
Aside from f.P.A.,
Who withers easily,
1480
01:12:15,765 --> 01:12:18,234
It seems as though
all your friends
1481
01:12:18,267 --> 01:12:19,769
Are here,
mrs. Parker.
1482
01:12:21,270 --> 01:12:23,239
Yes...
1483
01:12:23,272 --> 01:12:25,074
And paula, too.
1484
01:12:29,479 --> 01:12:31,448
It must be rough now
that benchley and charlie
1485
01:12:31,481 --> 01:12:34,250
Are such good
friends, huh?
1486
01:12:34,283 --> 01:12:36,119
It's not so bad.
1487
01:12:36,152 --> 01:12:38,455
I just let him
ignore me.
1488
01:12:41,290 --> 01:12:42,926
You know,
people still think
1489
01:12:42,959 --> 01:12:45,429
He's banging me
every night,
1490
01:12:45,462 --> 01:12:47,964
And sometimes i wish
to god he were.
1491
01:12:49,466 --> 01:12:51,468
But only sometimes.
1492
01:12:53,336 --> 01:12:56,372
You know, he sent me
$30 for the operation.
1493
01:12:58,141 --> 01:13:00,143
Judas making a refund.
1494
01:13:25,068 --> 01:13:28,472
Oh, for christ's sake.
1495
01:13:36,345 --> 01:13:38,014
there you are.
1496
01:13:38,047 --> 01:13:40,016
Fred, how long
do you think
1497
01:13:40,049 --> 01:13:41,217
We can keep
this thing up?
1498
01:13:41,250 --> 01:13:42,285
Keep what up?
1499
01:13:42,318 --> 01:13:43,753
You performing
six nights a week
1500
01:13:43,787 --> 01:13:46,055
And me covering
first acts.
1501
01:13:46,089 --> 01:13:47,491
We need the money,
mrs. Parker.
1502
01:13:47,524 --> 01:13:51,160
You only need enough money
to keep body and soul apart.
1503
01:13:51,194 --> 01:13:54,764
Shh. Remember,
mrs. Parker,
1504
01:13:54,798 --> 01:13:57,000
Speak easy.
1505
01:13:57,033 --> 01:13:58,502
Open up.
1506
01:13:58,535 --> 01:14:00,504
This is a raid.
1507
01:14:04,841 --> 01:14:07,010
Oh, god.
1508
01:14:10,246 --> 01:14:11,515
Please, mrs. Parker.
1509
01:14:11,548 --> 01:14:13,550
You're running
a fever, fred.
1510
01:14:13,583 --> 01:14:15,418
People will think i
beat you in private.
1511
01:14:15,451 --> 01:14:16,686
You're running it
ragged.
1512
01:14:16,720 --> 01:14:18,387
Probably how i managed
to get so much done
1513
01:14:18,421 --> 01:14:20,256
And still look
so dissipated.
1514
01:14:20,289 --> 01:14:22,091
I'll bet you haven't
eaten a thing all day.
1515
01:14:22,125 --> 01:14:24,661
Au contraire.
I found a little french place,
1516
01:14:24,694 --> 01:14:25,862
Completely
without charm.
1517
01:14:25,895 --> 01:14:28,264
One brown and one clear,
please.
1518
01:14:28,297 --> 01:14:33,570
Oh, for crying
out loud, fred.
1519
01:14:33,603 --> 01:14:35,071
The last thing
you need is that.
1520
01:14:35,104 --> 01:14:36,072
what?
1521
01:14:36,105 --> 01:14:37,240
What? What about
your family?
1522
01:14:37,273 --> 01:14:38,407
Who?
1523
01:14:38,441 --> 01:14:39,475
I forbid you.
1524
01:14:39,509 --> 01:14:40,744
May i remind you,
mrs. P.,
1525
01:14:40,777 --> 01:14:44,548
That i'm not a fictional
creation of hers.
1526
01:14:44,581 --> 01:14:47,817
What could you possibly say
to a thing like that?
1527
01:14:47,851 --> 01:14:50,086
"Did you go to the circus
this year?"
1528
01:14:50,119 --> 01:14:51,555
Oh, no, no. Better.
1529
01:14:51,588 --> 01:14:53,022
"When do your tonsils
come out?"
1530
01:14:53,056 --> 01:14:55,324
How about
"your regal presence at the bar
1531
01:14:55,358 --> 01:14:58,061
Has inspired my soul
to an upheaval"?
1532
01:14:58,094 --> 01:14:59,896
Hmm?
That's the source of all great literature...
1533
01:14:59,929 --> 01:15:01,931
An upheaved soul.
1534
01:15:05,401 --> 01:15:08,071
I, uh...have
a question to ask.
1535
01:15:08,104 --> 01:15:09,806
Mm-Hmm.
1536
01:15:09,839 --> 01:15:11,608
A serious one.
1537
01:15:16,112 --> 01:15:17,614
Anything.
1538
01:15:19,583 --> 01:15:23,787
Why do you think...
1539
01:15:23,820 --> 01:15:26,089
That we...
1540
01:15:26,122 --> 01:15:27,791
Yes?
1541
01:15:27,824 --> 01:15:29,358
You and i...
1542
01:15:29,392 --> 01:15:31,628
That would be "we,"
yeah.
1543
01:15:33,029 --> 01:15:35,298
Have never
misbehaved?
1544
01:15:39,803 --> 01:15:42,005
I'm referring
to what we don't do
1545
01:15:42,038 --> 01:15:44,173
In spite of everything.
1546
01:15:44,207 --> 01:15:46,643
What we don't do,
hmm.
1547
01:15:51,347 --> 01:15:53,149
Mrs. Parker, really.
1548
01:15:56,152 --> 01:15:58,121
Tell me.
1549
01:15:58,154 --> 01:15:59,656
Now.
1550
01:16:02,158 --> 01:16:03,827
Well...ahem.
1551
01:16:03,860 --> 01:16:06,329
I suppose we respect
each other too much.
1552
01:16:06,362 --> 01:16:08,832
Ah. We don't respect
anyone.
1553
01:16:08,865 --> 01:16:11,167
Well, mrs. Parker,
suppose it didn't work.
1554
01:16:12,669 --> 01:16:14,170
Suppose it did.
1555
01:16:18,274 --> 01:16:19,575
No. No, no.
1556
01:16:19,609 --> 01:16:20,509
It's a lot easier
to take disappointment
1557
01:16:20,543 --> 01:16:21,510
When you're young
1558
01:16:21,544 --> 01:16:23,179
Or dumb or don't
expect much,
1559
01:16:23,212 --> 01:16:25,749
But we're old
and smart.
1560
01:16:25,782 --> 01:16:27,851
Don't bat those
ingenue eyes at me.
1561
01:16:27,884 --> 01:16:30,153
You know what
i'm talking about.
1562
01:16:30,186 --> 01:16:31,387
That's the trouble.
You know entirely too much.
1563
01:16:31,420 --> 01:16:34,057
Oh, gee,
and i was thinking
1564
01:16:34,090 --> 01:16:35,892
I must not
know enough,
1565
01:16:35,925 --> 01:16:37,627
Because the things
i want most
1566
01:16:37,661 --> 01:16:39,796
I can't seem to get.
1567
01:16:39,829 --> 01:16:42,699
That's because you've
forgotten how to have fun.
1568
01:16:44,600 --> 01:16:46,803
Oh, really?
1569
01:16:46,836 --> 01:16:48,204
Fun?
1570
01:16:50,840 --> 01:16:53,710
I'll show you
some fun.
1571
01:16:54,778 --> 01:16:55,478
What are you doing?
1572
01:16:55,511 --> 01:16:56,780
Yes, you.
1573
01:16:56,813 --> 01:16:58,281
What are you doing?
1574
01:17:01,918 --> 01:17:04,387
You looked in need
of rescue, dear.
1575
01:17:04,420 --> 01:17:05,889
What's your name?
1576
01:17:05,922 --> 01:17:07,056
Joanie.
1577
01:17:07,090 --> 01:17:08,557
Sit down, joanie.
1578
01:17:08,591 --> 01:17:10,226
Joanie gerard.
1579
01:17:10,259 --> 01:17:11,895
How do you do?
I'm robert.
1580
01:17:11,928 --> 01:17:14,397
Are you an actress,
joanie gerard?
1581
01:17:14,430 --> 01:17:16,399
I'm a western
union girl.
1582
01:17:16,432 --> 01:17:17,901
Yeah. Oh.
1583
01:17:17,934 --> 01:17:20,403
But i want to be
an actress.
1584
01:17:20,436 --> 01:17:23,106
Oh, you dear,
brave soul.
1585
01:17:23,139 --> 01:17:24,607
You're in luck.
1586
01:17:24,640 --> 01:17:26,910
Freddy is a talent scout,
aren't you, fred?
1587
01:17:26,943 --> 01:17:28,411
Really?
1588
01:17:28,444 --> 01:17:30,413
Oh, well,
after a fashion.
1589
01:17:30,446 --> 01:17:32,749
And this is
mrs. Parker,
1590
01:17:32,782 --> 01:17:35,051
My good friend
and favorite living writer.
1591
01:17:35,084 --> 01:17:36,419
But not much fun.
1592
01:17:36,452 --> 01:17:38,421
You're a real,
living writer?
1593
01:17:38,454 --> 01:17:40,123
Currently on leave.
1594
01:17:41,524 --> 01:17:42,726
Jeez,
i feel like
1595
01:17:42,759 --> 01:17:46,329
I ought to drop a
curtsy or something.
1596
01:17:46,362 --> 01:17:49,232
Her curtsy, your pants,
my teeth.
1597
01:17:49,265 --> 01:17:51,267
Ha ha!
All right.
1598
01:17:51,300 --> 01:17:53,236
So...
what do you say?
1599
01:17:53,269 --> 01:17:54,603
Shall we go wild
tonight?
1600
01:17:54,637 --> 01:17:56,572
Yeah, fred.
What do you say?
1601
01:17:56,605 --> 01:17:58,441
You want
to go wild?
1602
01:17:58,474 --> 01:17:59,876
I could outline
several opera plots
1603
01:17:59,909 --> 01:18:01,878
I've been working on.
1604
01:18:01,911 --> 01:18:02,879
Oh!
1605
01:18:02,912 --> 01:18:05,148
Oh,
forget him, dear.
1606
01:18:05,181 --> 01:18:06,950
I've just been released
1607
01:18:06,983 --> 01:18:09,152
From our lady
of malpractice,
1608
01:18:09,185 --> 01:18:11,454
And i want
to go wild.
1609
01:18:11,487 --> 01:18:14,123
How do i learn how?
1610
01:18:14,157 --> 01:18:16,092
Aah!
Aah!
1611
01:18:25,334 --> 01:18:27,470
Uh! Uh!
1612
01:18:27,503 --> 01:18:30,206
Oh! Oh!
1613
01:18:31,307 --> 01:18:33,142
Uh! Uh!
1614
01:18:33,176 --> 01:18:35,311
artists...that's why
we invite them.
1615
01:18:37,113 --> 01:18:38,281
Ha ha!
1616
01:18:38,314 --> 01:18:39,916
Bravo, george.
1617
01:18:39,949 --> 01:18:40,984
Bravo!
1618
01:18:41,017 --> 01:18:43,252
mind us, you cretins!
1619
01:18:44,220 --> 01:18:46,489
Well played!
1620
01:18:46,522 --> 01:18:47,991
That wasn't
very sporting.
1621
01:18:48,024 --> 01:18:49,492
Well...
1622
01:18:49,525 --> 01:18:51,494
Do we have a game?
1623
01:18:51,527 --> 01:18:52,996
I'll sing an opera.
1624
01:18:53,029 --> 01:18:54,998
You gentlemen see
if you can name it.
1625
01:18:55,031 --> 01:18:56,499
All right.
1626
01:18:56,532 --> 01:18:58,034
Here we go.
1627
01:19:05,541 --> 01:19:08,511
I would say that is,
uh...joe green.
1628
01:19:08,544 --> 01:19:10,146
Yes. It's definitely
joe green.
1629
01:19:10,179 --> 01:19:12,281
Giuseppe verdi.
1630
01:19:12,315 --> 01:19:13,716
Don't look now, toots,
1631
01:19:13,749 --> 01:19:15,819
But unmarried yale barristers
have been spotted
1632
01:19:15,852 --> 01:19:18,521
Cavorting
on the south lawn.
1633
01:19:18,554 --> 01:19:22,025
Oh, a girl can
get splinters
1634
01:19:22,058 --> 01:19:24,593
Sliding down
a barrister.
1635
01:19:24,627 --> 01:19:26,162
What else?
1636
01:19:26,195 --> 01:19:28,832
What about our athletic friend
down there?
1637
01:19:28,865 --> 01:19:31,367
He's built like a horse.
1638
01:19:31,400 --> 01:19:33,736
Always
so optimistic.
1639
01:19:33,769 --> 01:19:36,539
Well,
he keeps waving his mallet in my direction.
1640
01:19:36,572 --> 01:19:38,341
It must
mean something.
1641
01:19:38,374 --> 01:19:40,043
What are you doing?
1642
01:19:40,076 --> 01:19:42,045
This isn't polo,
you cretin.
1643
01:19:42,078 --> 01:19:44,180
Descend from your perch,
my little mourning dove,
1644
01:19:44,213 --> 01:19:47,483
And show this neomalthusian
how it's done.
1645
01:19:49,018 --> 01:19:51,754
Mind if
i join you?
1646
01:19:51,787 --> 01:19:55,358
You must be picking
wallflowers, scott.
1647
01:19:55,391 --> 01:19:56,893
Well, sherry,
i read your latest short story...
1648
01:19:56,926 --> 01:19:58,261
"Extra, extra."
1649
01:19:58,294 --> 01:20:01,530
It was as fine a bit of
writing i've ever read...
1650
01:20:01,564 --> 01:20:05,568
Short, lean,
acid, so good.
1651
01:20:05,601 --> 01:20:08,171
This is a magazine
of the city.
1652
01:20:08,204 --> 01:20:09,205
A smart magazine.
1653
01:20:09,238 --> 01:20:12,541
And not for the little
old lady in dubuque.
1654
01:20:12,575 --> 01:20:13,576
You have a title?
1655
01:20:13,609 --> 01:20:16,045
* ba ba ba ba-Da
1656
01:20:16,079 --> 01:20:18,314
* ba ba ba ba-Da
ba ba-Da ba ba-Da *
1657
01:20:18,347 --> 01:20:19,048
What's in a name?
1658
01:20:19,082 --> 01:20:21,450
A name is simply
a name.
1659
01:20:21,484 --> 01:20:23,586
It's who you know,
darling.
1660
01:20:23,619 --> 01:20:24,720
It's who you know.
1661
01:20:24,753 --> 01:20:25,955
Most
of our friends
1662
01:20:25,989 --> 01:20:27,323
Will be
contributing.
1663
01:20:27,356 --> 01:20:28,925
Dorothy parker,
for one.
1664
01:20:28,958 --> 01:20:29,758
George kaufman.
1665
01:20:29,792 --> 01:20:30,526
F.P.A.
1666
01:20:30,559 --> 01:20:31,660
Bob benchley.
1667
01:20:31,694 --> 01:20:36,099
They're all devoted
to the idea.
1668
01:20:36,132 --> 01:20:37,901
So, we're...
1669
01:20:37,934 --> 01:20:38,868
George, come here!
1670
01:20:38,902 --> 01:20:41,437
Is he through
that wicket?
1671
01:20:41,470 --> 01:20:43,139
Wicket's
crooked, marc.
1672
01:20:43,172 --> 01:20:44,107
Ha!
1673
01:20:44,140 --> 01:20:45,408
You cheat.
1674
01:20:45,441 --> 01:20:46,675
Whose ball
is this?
1675
01:20:46,709 --> 01:20:47,543
That's edna's.
1676
01:20:47,576 --> 01:20:50,479
Oh,
for god's sake!
1677
01:20:50,513 --> 01:20:52,615
What do you
want to do, huh?
1678
01:20:52,648 --> 01:20:54,550
I've always wanted
to write a novel
1679
01:20:54,583 --> 01:20:55,284
Or a play.
1680
01:20:55,318 --> 01:20:56,319
How old are you?
1681
01:20:56,352 --> 01:20:58,021
28.
1682
01:20:58,054 --> 01:20:59,355
Don't let
the time pass.
1683
01:20:59,388 --> 01:21:01,824
If you want to write something,
you write it.
1684
01:21:01,857 --> 01:21:04,727
Don't turn 40
wishing you had.
1685
01:21:04,760 --> 01:21:06,629
Aah!
1686
01:21:06,662 --> 01:21:08,031
Why is harpo
the only one of us
1687
01:21:08,064 --> 01:21:11,500
Who enjoys performing
like a seal?
1688
01:21:11,534 --> 01:21:13,669
Please
don't answer that.
1689
01:21:13,702 --> 01:21:14,770
It's a magazine
for a man
1690
01:21:14,803 --> 01:21:17,173
Who knows his way
around the city.
1691
01:21:17,206 --> 01:21:19,808
Yes. A man
not unlike myself.
1692
01:21:19,842 --> 01:21:21,344
What's this magazine
about, ross...
1693
01:21:21,377 --> 01:21:23,579
Shipping news?
1694
01:21:23,612 --> 01:21:25,514
It's a magazine
about new york
1695
01:21:25,548 --> 01:21:26,315
For people
with manners.
1696
01:21:26,349 --> 01:21:27,150
Yeah.
M-Manners.
1697
01:21:27,183 --> 01:21:31,654
Well, if it's
about new york,
1698
01:21:31,687 --> 01:21:33,957
Why not call it
the new yorker?
1699
01:21:33,990 --> 01:21:35,624
Now, that's
brilliant.
1700
01:21:37,860 --> 01:21:40,296
Hello.
1701
01:21:40,329 --> 01:21:42,665
I hope you like
to gamble, dorothy,
1702
01:21:42,698 --> 01:21:44,067
Because i
just made a bet
1703
01:21:44,100 --> 01:21:46,669
That i can
make you smile.
1704
01:21:46,702 --> 01:21:49,672
Oh, i hate to see
anyone lose money.
1705
01:21:49,705 --> 01:21:51,674
It's so hard
to find.
1706
01:21:51,707 --> 01:21:52,942
Don't go away.
1707
01:21:52,976 --> 01:21:56,545
I must eat something
before i pass out.
1708
01:21:59,815 --> 01:22:01,817
Attention,
everyone.
1709
01:22:01,850 --> 01:22:03,519
Maybe dorothy
would consent
1710
01:22:03,552 --> 01:22:07,890
To recite one of her
little things for us.
1711
01:22:07,923 --> 01:22:11,127
Well, maybe i'll just
digest my little supper
1712
01:22:11,160 --> 01:22:13,062
And sing for it later.
1713
01:22:13,096 --> 01:22:14,230
Oh, please,
dorothy.
1714
01:22:14,263 --> 01:22:17,733
Something bilious
for dessert.
1715
01:22:17,766 --> 01:22:19,035
No. Something bubbly,
mrs. Parker.
1716
01:22:19,068 --> 01:22:20,803
Something
bubbly bilious.
1717
01:22:20,836 --> 01:22:22,471
Double bubbly,
but don't bill us.
1718
01:22:22,505 --> 01:22:23,006
Ha ha ha ha!
1719
01:22:23,039 --> 01:22:24,007
One more drink,
1720
01:22:24,040 --> 01:22:25,708
And i'll be
under the host.
1721
01:22:25,741 --> 01:22:27,476
Oh, please,
mrs. Parker.
1722
01:22:27,510 --> 01:22:28,911
Do honor us
1723
01:22:28,944 --> 01:22:31,247
With one of your
darling little poems.
1724
01:22:33,416 --> 01:22:35,584
Resume.
1725
01:22:35,618 --> 01:22:37,886
Razors pain you.
1726
01:22:37,920 --> 01:22:40,589
Rivers are damp.
1727
01:22:40,623 --> 01:22:42,658
Acids stain you,
1728
01:22:42,691 --> 01:22:44,893
And drugs cause cramp.
1729
01:22:44,927 --> 01:22:47,363
Guns aren't lawful.
1730
01:22:47,396 --> 01:22:49,498
Nooses give.
1731
01:22:49,532 --> 01:22:53,536
Gas smells awful.
1732
01:22:53,569 --> 01:22:55,004
You might as well live.
1733
01:23:01,844 --> 01:23:03,146
Another
cheerful poem.
1734
01:23:03,179 --> 01:23:07,883
Bravo!
1735
01:23:09,818 --> 01:23:11,287
What
a fascinating woman.
1736
01:23:11,320 --> 01:23:13,356
Nice going.
1737
01:23:19,362 --> 01:23:20,663
Dorothy!
1738
01:23:28,204 --> 01:23:31,274
So,
is it true that you live in a rathole?
1739
01:23:31,307 --> 01:23:32,975
Oh, i like
my apartment.
1740
01:23:33,008 --> 01:23:35,644
It's just big enough
to lay my hat
1741
01:23:35,678 --> 01:23:38,047
And a few friends.
1742
01:23:39,515 --> 01:23:42,551
Did you know my family's
in bird sanctuaries?
1743
01:23:42,585 --> 01:23:43,986
It's true.
1744
01:23:44,019 --> 01:23:45,488
Rather interesting.
1745
01:23:45,521 --> 01:23:48,824
Let's say i buy
a peacock for $5.00,
1746
01:23:48,857 --> 01:23:50,493
Throw it up
in a tree,
1747
01:23:50,526 --> 01:23:54,263
And then charge, oh,
any tom, dick, and harry
1748
01:23:54,297 --> 01:23:55,531
$2.00 apiece
just to...
1749
01:24:40,409 --> 01:24:44,046
Oh, don't worry,
uh...roger.
1750
01:24:44,079 --> 01:24:46,081
I don't review
rehearsals.
1751
01:24:48,083 --> 01:24:50,085
Oh, god.
1752
01:25:55,651 --> 01:25:59,154
Her mind lives
in a quiet room,
1753
01:25:59,188 --> 01:26:02,625
A narrow room,
and tall,
1754
01:26:02,658 --> 01:26:07,129
With pretty lamps
to quench the gloom
1755
01:26:07,162 --> 01:26:10,299
And mottoes on the wall.
1756
01:26:10,333 --> 01:26:14,136
There all the things
are wax and neat
1757
01:26:14,169 --> 01:26:17,506
And set
in decorous lines,
1758
01:26:17,540 --> 01:26:23,178
And there are posies,
round and sweet,
1759
01:26:23,212 --> 01:26:27,082
And little,
straightened vines.
1760
01:26:27,115 --> 01:26:31,019
Her mind lives tidily,
apart from cold
1761
01:26:31,053 --> 01:26:33,088
And noise
1762
01:26:33,121 --> 01:26:35,691
And pain,
1763
01:26:35,724 --> 01:26:40,263
And bolts the door
against her heart,
1764
01:26:40,296 --> 01:26:43,165
Out wailing
in the rain.
1765
01:26:44,533 --> 01:26:47,169
I think i was born
to live in a hotel.
1766
01:26:47,202 --> 01:26:48,404
It helps me concentrate
1767
01:26:48,437 --> 01:26:49,872
Knowing i can
just sign for things
1768
01:26:49,905 --> 01:26:51,374
Whenever i need them.
1769
01:26:51,407 --> 01:26:52,875
Yes, it's wonderful.
1770
01:26:52,908 --> 01:26:55,844
But, of course,
the bill always comes through
1771
01:26:55,878 --> 01:26:57,280
At the end
of the month.
1772
01:26:57,313 --> 01:27:00,015
I trust that won't
be a problem.
1773
01:27:00,048 --> 01:27:01,850
Scout's honor.
1774
01:27:01,884 --> 01:27:06,021
Well,
i think this hotel's always been very lucky
1775
01:27:06,054 --> 01:27:06,689
For writers,
mrs. Parker.
1776
01:27:06,722 --> 01:27:08,391
For example,
1777
01:27:08,424 --> 01:27:11,927
Do you have any idea how
many important plays
1778
01:27:11,960 --> 01:27:13,195
Have been
written here?
1779
01:27:13,228 --> 01:27:15,197
Well, well.
How fortunate.
1780
01:27:15,230 --> 01:27:17,199
I'm working
on a play.
1781
01:27:17,232 --> 01:27:18,801
And if you're right,
1782
01:27:18,834 --> 01:27:19,835
We won't
have to worry
1783
01:27:19,868 --> 01:27:22,638
About the rent,
now, will we?
1784
01:27:22,671 --> 01:27:25,207
I wouldn't go away
from you for anything!
1785
01:27:25,240 --> 01:27:26,409
There's nothing
in the world...
1786
01:27:26,442 --> 01:27:28,711
No, no. Stop, please.
You mustn't move.
1787
01:27:28,744 --> 01:27:31,113
Stop! Stop!
1788
01:27:31,146 --> 01:27:32,180
You mustn't move
on his speech!
1789
01:27:32,214 --> 01:27:33,916
Oh, my! I can't
work like this!
1790
01:27:33,949 --> 01:27:35,217
Dorothy,
don't you think
1791
01:27:35,250 --> 01:27:36,552
She ought to be
wearing a brassiere?
1792
01:27:36,585 --> 01:27:37,920
Oh, god, no.
1793
01:27:37,953 --> 01:27:41,490
We've got to have something
in this show that moves.
1794
01:27:46,595 --> 01:27:48,063
Good afternoon,
mr. Benchley.
1795
01:27:48,096 --> 01:27:49,231
Hello.
1796
01:27:49,264 --> 01:27:50,499
Loved the play.
1797
01:27:50,533 --> 01:27:53,235
Let's hope it's a big
financial success!
1798
01:27:53,268 --> 01:27:56,439
I owe him three
months on the rent.
1799
01:27:56,472 --> 01:27:58,741
Well, at least you got
fantastic reviews.
1800
01:27:58,774 --> 01:28:01,610
Yes. And some were even
from total strangers.
1801
01:28:01,644 --> 01:28:04,947
Ha ha ha!
1802
01:28:04,980 --> 01:28:06,949
Oh, i suppose
it was dull,
1803
01:28:06,982 --> 01:28:09,752
And you all have
my apologies.
1804
01:28:09,785 --> 01:28:12,254
But how can you know
about your own?
1805
01:28:12,287 --> 01:28:13,756
You can't.
1806
01:28:13,789 --> 01:28:16,258
I want to know
who decided to open it
1807
01:28:16,291 --> 01:28:17,426
Two days
before christmas.
1808
01:28:17,460 --> 01:28:19,528
I hear
your mr. Benchley
1809
01:28:19,562 --> 01:28:22,598
Has taken up residence
at polly adler's brothel.
1810
01:28:22,631 --> 01:28:23,899
Well, that is,
of course,
1811
01:28:23,932 --> 01:28:26,535
When he's not
with that little show girl.
1812
01:28:26,569 --> 01:28:28,537
Maybe it wouldn't hurt
to work that in.
1813
01:28:28,571 --> 01:28:31,206
The play's about benchley
anyway, isn't it, dot?
1814
01:28:31,239 --> 01:28:33,041
Look on the bright side,
dorothy.
1815
01:28:33,075 --> 01:28:34,209
Bobby.
1816
01:28:34,242 --> 01:28:35,444
Hello, broun.
1817
01:28:35,478 --> 01:28:36,479
My place has
got your name
1818
01:28:36,512 --> 01:28:37,846
Written
all over it.
1819
01:28:37,880 --> 01:28:41,116
Thank you, don.
Thank you.
1820
01:28:41,149 --> 01:28:42,951
Miss hunt,
how do you do?
1821
01:28:42,985 --> 01:28:44,987
Miss ferber.
1822
01:28:49,825 --> 01:28:51,226
Well, when they laughed
at the mandolin duet,
1823
01:28:51,259 --> 01:28:53,696
I wanted to bash
their skulls in.
1824
01:28:53,729 --> 01:28:56,298
Could have used
a french horn.
1825
01:28:56,331 --> 01:28:58,333
I think it's more
of a magnificent tragedy
1826
01:28:58,367 --> 01:29:00,403
Than it is a comedy.
1827
01:29:00,436 --> 01:29:02,771
It's a wonderful play,
and that's final.
1828
01:29:02,805 --> 01:29:04,873
I'm afraid so.
1829
01:29:04,907 --> 01:29:08,010
We did a cool $90 at
yesterday's matinee.
1830
01:29:08,043 --> 01:29:09,077
Philip's closing it
next week.
1831
01:29:09,111 --> 01:29:10,446
What?
1832
01:29:10,479 --> 01:29:12,748
Mr. Woollcott,
we really have to clear the room
1833
01:29:12,781 --> 01:29:14,450
To prepare for
the dinner service.
1834
01:29:14,483 --> 01:29:15,851
Clear the room?
1835
01:29:15,884 --> 01:29:16,885
Obviously
has no taste.
1836
01:29:16,919 --> 01:29:17,820
You imbecile!
1837
01:29:17,853 --> 01:29:19,822
Do i look like
a piece of furniture?
1838
01:29:19,855 --> 01:29:22,324
Well, actually,
an entire showroom.
1839
01:29:22,357 --> 01:29:23,826
On a good day.
1840
01:29:23,859 --> 01:29:26,962
Ha! Let's go up
to my room, everybody.
1841
01:29:26,995 --> 01:29:28,431
You coming, fred?
1842
01:29:28,464 --> 01:29:31,500
I think i'll catch up
with you later.
1843
01:29:33,135 --> 01:29:35,538
At polly's?
1844
01:29:35,571 --> 01:29:38,206
Why don't we say
at tony's, mrs. Parker?
1845
01:29:38,240 --> 01:29:40,242
Thank you, sir.
1846
01:29:40,275 --> 01:29:41,644
Please,
mr. Benchley.
1847
01:29:41,677 --> 01:29:43,679
I've never been
to a whorehouse.
1848
01:29:43,712 --> 01:29:44,980
Mrs. Parker...
1849
01:29:45,013 --> 01:29:46,849
It's not
unlike the theater
1850
01:29:46,882 --> 01:29:48,283
In many ways.
1851
01:29:48,316 --> 01:29:49,852
Satisfied?
1852
01:29:51,186 --> 01:29:53,856
No. Ha ha!
1853
01:29:53,889 --> 01:29:55,524
Never,
i suppose.
1854
01:30:05,534 --> 01:30:07,703
"For polly.
Long may she wave.
1855
01:30:07,736 --> 01:30:09,838
Al tennyson."
1856
01:30:09,872 --> 01:30:11,339
Yeah,
mr. Benchley.
1857
01:30:11,373 --> 01:30:12,641
Oh,
that's very good.
1858
01:30:12,675 --> 01:30:16,211
I prefer
a real whorehouse
1859
01:30:16,244 --> 01:30:17,846
To the theater.
1860
01:30:17,880 --> 01:30:19,014
Oh, yes.
1861
01:30:19,047 --> 01:30:20,616
If a girl
can't sing here,
1862
01:30:20,649 --> 01:30:21,517
She has the good
manners to fake it.
1863
01:30:21,550 --> 01:30:22,651
What's
the going rate?
1864
01:30:22,685 --> 01:30:24,953
I like the looks
of that one there.
1865
01:30:24,987 --> 01:30:25,954
she's a guest.
1866
01:30:25,988 --> 01:30:27,189
Well, so am i.
1867
01:30:27,222 --> 01:30:28,491
Oh, bobby,
1868
01:30:28,524 --> 01:30:29,792
Are you going to read
to me again tonight?
1869
01:30:29,825 --> 01:30:32,427
Oh, another county
heard from.
1870
01:30:32,461 --> 01:30:35,864
Um, i'd like you
to meet my good friend,
1871
01:30:35,898 --> 01:30:37,466
Mrs...
mrs. Parker.
1872
01:30:38,066 --> 01:30:39,001
Mrs. Parker...
1873
01:30:39,034 --> 01:30:40,002
is she all right?
1874
01:30:40,035 --> 01:30:42,204
I think she
should lie down.
1875
01:30:42,237 --> 01:30:43,539
Here we are.
1876
01:30:43,572 --> 01:30:45,908
Yes, i think
i hit my...ass.
1877
01:30:45,941 --> 01:30:48,410
take her to
the lavender room, coco.
1878
01:30:48,443 --> 01:30:49,912
yes, miss adler.
1879
01:30:49,945 --> 01:30:51,647
Oh...
i'm so sorry.
1880
01:30:51,680 --> 01:30:52,615
it's right this way.
1881
01:30:52,648 --> 01:30:54,016
i'll go up with her.
1882
01:30:54,049 --> 01:30:57,853
I had medical training
in the army, you know.
1883
01:31:00,288 --> 01:31:03,425
Suspicions
confirmed, fred.
1884
01:31:03,458 --> 01:31:06,762
I am
a drunken whore.
1885
01:31:06,795 --> 01:31:08,731
You're an artist,
mrs. Parker.
1886
01:31:08,764 --> 01:31:11,233
Sometimes artists
lose their balance.
1887
01:31:11,266 --> 01:31:12,935
Ah...
1888
01:31:12,968 --> 01:31:15,938
I'm little dorothy with the
curse of the rothschilds
1889
01:31:15,971 --> 01:31:17,740
Hanging
over her head.
1890
01:31:17,773 --> 01:31:19,942
You're the artist,
mr. Benchley.
1891
01:31:19,975 --> 01:31:20,976
No, no. Not me.
1892
01:31:21,009 --> 01:31:21,944
Don't lay that
on me.
1893
01:31:21,977 --> 01:31:24,079
I've discovered
i have no real talent
1894
01:31:24,112 --> 01:31:25,714
For writing.
1895
01:31:25,748 --> 01:31:29,251
I can't quit
because i'm too famous.
1896
01:31:29,284 --> 01:31:30,819
All right?
1897
01:31:32,320 --> 01:31:34,389
Here we are.
1898
01:31:34,422 --> 01:31:37,292
You lean down here.
1899
01:31:37,325 --> 01:31:39,494
I want to check
your temperature.
1900
01:32:14,296 --> 01:32:17,465
You need some rest,
mrs. Parker.
1901
01:32:17,499 --> 01:32:19,001
Mr. Benchley...
1902
01:32:21,369 --> 01:32:23,271
Yes, mrs. Parker.
1903
01:32:23,305 --> 01:32:25,540
Oh! Ha ha!
1904
01:32:40,055 --> 01:32:41,323
Oh...
1905
01:32:41,356 --> 01:32:42,858
Christ.
1906
01:32:45,060 --> 01:32:46,862
Oh...
1907
01:32:48,731 --> 01:32:51,867
goddamn it,
thurber.
1908
01:32:51,900 --> 01:32:52,735
Is ross in?
1909
01:32:52,768 --> 01:32:54,236
Yes, but he's
engaged right now.
1910
01:32:54,269 --> 01:32:55,270
You'll have to
take a seat.
1911
01:32:55,303 --> 01:32:56,304
Excuse me, miss!
1912
01:32:56,338 --> 01:32:57,405
Do it over again!
1913
01:32:57,439 --> 01:32:58,841
Thurber's crazy.
You talk to him.
1914
01:32:58,874 --> 01:33:00,843
Finally!
I've been wondering what happened to you.
1915
01:33:00,876 --> 01:33:02,177
Do you have
the article?
1916
01:33:02,210 --> 01:33:03,679
This was due
on the third.
1917
01:33:03,712 --> 01:33:06,815
Somebody was using
the pencil.
1918
01:33:06,849 --> 01:33:07,816
You look terrible,
dottie.
1919
01:33:07,850 --> 01:33:10,185
Have you not
been sleeping?
1920
01:33:10,218 --> 01:33:11,386
Woodrow wilson died.
1921
01:33:11,419 --> 01:33:12,955
Yes. I heard.
1922
01:33:12,988 --> 01:33:14,156
About a year ago.
1923
01:33:14,189 --> 01:33:15,157
Last week.
1924
01:33:15,190 --> 01:33:16,424
You have me there.
1925
01:33:16,458 --> 01:33:18,994
This is not a charitable donation,
ross.
1926
01:33:19,027 --> 01:33:20,462
I'm fighting them off
at the hotel,
1927
01:33:20,495 --> 01:33:21,630
And my bank account
is so overdrawn,
1928
01:33:21,664 --> 01:33:23,365
It's positively
photographic.
1929
01:33:23,398 --> 01:33:25,233
You'll be paid eventually.
I promise.
1930
01:33:25,267 --> 01:33:27,736
Don't believe him, dottie.
He owes me for years.
1931
01:33:27,770 --> 01:33:29,504
Jane, for christ's
sake, please.
1932
01:33:29,537 --> 01:33:31,674
Dottie, really,
this is just wonderful.
1933
01:33:31,707 --> 01:33:32,607
Herbert spencer
once said,
1934
01:33:32,641 --> 01:33:33,676
"A genius
can do readily
1935
01:33:33,709 --> 01:33:34,877
What nobody else
can do at all,"
1936
01:33:34,910 --> 01:33:36,745
And that's
what i'm doing.
1937
01:33:36,779 --> 01:33:39,514
Dottie,
i can't read this right now.
1938
01:33:39,547 --> 01:33:41,083
What a thing to be doing
at my age,
1939
01:33:41,116 --> 01:33:42,584
Sitting around
making up stories
1940
01:33:42,617 --> 01:33:43,919
About broken-Hearted
sissies.
1941
01:33:43,952 --> 01:33:47,790
Dottie, where
are you going?
1942
01:34:05,407 --> 01:34:06,909
Mrs. Parker.
1943
01:34:08,744 --> 01:34:11,747
I just wanted to see
if you still answered to that.
1944
01:34:16,919 --> 01:34:19,387
We are still married,
aren't we, eddie?
1945
01:34:19,421 --> 01:34:20,889
I guess so.
1946
01:34:20,923 --> 01:34:24,559
I guess we ought to talk about
getting a divorce, then.
1947
01:34:24,592 --> 01:34:25,894
Not today.
1948
01:34:25,928 --> 01:34:27,395
I'm feeling
too good.
1949
01:34:27,429 --> 01:34:28,330
Oh, is it catching?
1950
01:34:28,363 --> 01:34:30,232
Sure. Why not?
1951
01:34:32,267 --> 01:34:34,102
You look swell,
eddie.
1952
01:34:34,136 --> 01:34:35,403
Do i, really?
1953
01:34:35,437 --> 01:34:36,905
Truly.
1954
01:34:36,939 --> 01:34:38,406
Thanks.
1955
01:34:38,440 --> 01:34:39,908
You look beautiful.
1956
01:34:39,942 --> 01:34:41,944
Oh, where the hell
are you looking?
1957
01:34:41,977 --> 01:34:43,145
At you.
1958
01:34:43,178 --> 01:34:45,313
No. I'm...
1959
01:34:45,347 --> 01:34:48,416
Lower than worms.
1960
01:34:48,450 --> 01:34:51,419
I miss feeling
safe, eddie.
1961
01:34:51,453 --> 01:34:53,421
I do miss that.
1962
01:34:53,455 --> 01:34:55,423
Is that
what we were?
1963
01:34:55,457 --> 01:34:57,259
You could have
fooled me.
1964
01:34:59,461 --> 01:35:02,264
You're not going
to cry, are you?
1965
01:35:05,467 --> 01:35:07,102
Woodrow died.
1966
01:35:07,135 --> 01:35:08,436
Did he?
I'm sorry.
1967
01:35:08,470 --> 01:35:11,940
I'm all alone again
and broke.
1968
01:35:11,974 --> 01:35:13,441
See?
1969
01:35:13,475 --> 01:35:14,943
I'm flush.
1970
01:35:14,977 --> 01:35:17,279
Let me buy you
a present.
1971
01:35:23,351 --> 01:35:24,719
Now you can
buy me lunch
1972
01:35:24,753 --> 01:35:27,990
If you promise
not to be very dull.
1973
01:35:29,391 --> 01:35:31,459
I'd love to, dear,
but i can't.
1974
01:35:31,493 --> 01:35:34,897
I'm meeting someone,
and i'm late.
1975
01:35:34,930 --> 01:35:36,799
Another time, though.
I insist.
1976
01:35:36,832 --> 01:35:40,468
Actually,
i'm meeting someone, too.
1977
01:35:40,502 --> 01:35:43,005
It's really been
lovely seeing you.
1978
01:35:48,176 --> 01:35:50,378
Dear...
1979
01:35:50,412 --> 01:35:52,014
Oh.
1980
01:35:53,949 --> 01:35:57,853
I do not like
my state of mind.
1981
01:35:57,886 --> 01:36:03,792
I'm bitter,
querulous, unkind.
1982
01:36:03,826 --> 01:36:08,663
I hate my legs,
i hate my hands,
1983
01:36:08,696 --> 01:36:13,001
I do not yearn
for lovelier lands.
1984
01:36:13,035 --> 01:36:15,971
I dread
the dawn's recurrent light.
1985
01:36:16,004 --> 01:36:18,941
I hate to go
to bed at night.
1986
01:36:18,974 --> 01:36:23,645
I snoot
at earnest, simple folk.
1987
01:36:23,678 --> 01:36:27,782
I cannot take
the gentlest joke.
1988
01:36:27,816 --> 01:36:31,786
I find no peace
in paint or type.
1989
01:36:31,820 --> 01:36:34,156
My world is but
a lot of tripe.
1990
01:36:34,189 --> 01:36:37,826
I'm disillusioned,
empty-Breasted.
1991
01:36:37,860 --> 01:36:42,330
For what i think,
i'd be arrested.
1992
01:36:42,364 --> 01:36:44,532
I am not sick,
1993
01:36:44,566 --> 01:36:47,202
I am not well.
1994
01:36:47,235 --> 01:36:50,973
My quondam dreams
are shot to hell.
1995
01:36:51,006 --> 01:36:54,276
My soul is crushed,
1996
01:36:54,309 --> 01:36:57,479
My spirit sore.
1997
01:36:57,512 --> 01:37:01,716
I do not like me
anymore.
1998
01:37:01,749 --> 01:37:06,554
I cavil, quarrel,
grumble, grouse.
1999
01:37:06,588 --> 01:37:10,058
I ponder
on the narrow house.
2000
01:37:10,092 --> 01:37:15,530
I shudder
at the thought of men...
2001
01:37:18,300 --> 01:37:21,203
I'm due
to fall in love again.
2002
01:37:23,138 --> 01:37:26,208
Well, i'll mention it
to her again, mr. Case,
2003
01:37:26,241 --> 01:37:29,077
But there really isn't
that much i can do.
2004
01:37:29,111 --> 01:37:30,946
It's a very difficult
situation.
2005
01:37:33,148 --> 01:37:34,449
Dottie?
2006
01:37:36,784 --> 01:37:38,753
I'd like
to talk to you.
2007
01:37:38,786 --> 01:37:40,288
Cheese it, the fuzz.
2008
01:37:40,322 --> 01:37:43,625
Mrs. Parker.
2009
01:37:43,658 --> 01:37:45,493
I don't know how
he's going to feel
2010
01:37:45,527 --> 01:37:48,430
About an untrained puppy
piddling on his rugs.
2011
01:37:48,463 --> 01:37:49,364
He didn't
like it much
2012
01:37:49,397 --> 01:37:51,433
When the trained
one did.
2013
01:37:51,466 --> 01:37:52,534
Plus, i have
to write him
2014
01:37:52,567 --> 01:37:54,669
Another i.O.U.
For the rent.
2015
01:37:54,702 --> 01:37:56,604
Well, they wouldn't
throw you out.
2016
01:37:56,638 --> 01:37:58,941
You're good
for too much publicity.
2017
01:37:58,974 --> 01:38:00,408
How was lunch?
2018
01:38:00,442 --> 01:38:01,776
Did they talk
about me?
2019
01:38:01,809 --> 01:38:03,778
Of course they
talked about you.
2020
01:38:03,811 --> 01:38:05,948
Rex...
2021
01:38:05,981 --> 01:38:08,150
Learn to read,
darling.
2022
01:38:10,685 --> 01:38:14,656
It's time to think
about serious work.
2023
01:38:16,691 --> 01:38:18,493
Thinking is working,
isn't it?
2024
01:38:18,526 --> 01:38:19,894
Well,
of course it is.
2025
01:38:19,928 --> 01:38:21,763
It's the kind
that i do best.
2026
01:38:21,796 --> 01:38:23,966
Why don't you write
a novel, dear?
2027
01:38:23,999 --> 01:38:25,133
You could probably
knock one off
2028
01:38:25,167 --> 01:38:26,634
In, say,
20 or 30 years.
2029
01:38:26,668 --> 01:38:29,804
Oh, yes.
Why not a novel?
2030
01:38:29,837 --> 01:38:32,674
I put as much work
into writing nonsense
2031
01:38:32,707 --> 01:38:34,276
As i do the things
that matter,
2032
01:38:34,309 --> 01:38:36,778
And it's the nonsense
everybody notices.
2033
01:38:36,811 --> 01:38:38,981
And you know what?
2034
01:38:39,014 --> 01:38:41,116
By the time i'm paid
for what i do,
2035
01:38:41,149 --> 01:38:44,186
The money's
already gone.
2036
01:38:44,219 --> 01:38:48,190
But you can dream
on a book, can't you?
2037
01:38:48,223 --> 01:38:49,524
Absolutely.
2038
01:38:51,859 --> 01:38:54,062
Have we
ever touched?
2039
01:39:08,710 --> 01:39:10,545
Hello,
mrs. Parker.
2040
01:39:36,271 --> 01:39:37,739
Mmm.
2041
01:39:44,712 --> 01:39:48,750
Do you think we should
drink this one, too, hmm?
2042
01:39:48,783 --> 01:39:50,552
How about to us?
2043
01:39:50,585 --> 01:39:54,756
Yes, it's too bad
we don't look prettier.
2044
01:39:54,789 --> 01:39:56,858
We were pretty once,
though, weren't we?
2045
01:39:56,891 --> 01:39:58,960
Hmm?
2046
01:39:58,993 --> 01:40:01,563
You might not think
it matters,
2047
01:40:01,596 --> 01:40:03,765
But i do.
2048
01:40:03,798 --> 01:40:05,400
I'll tell you why.
2049
01:40:05,433 --> 01:40:09,771
Because, my dear,
it all turns on that.
2050
01:40:09,804 --> 01:40:12,574
All those little sags
and...
2051
01:40:14,076 --> 01:40:14,909
What is
going on here?
2052
01:40:14,942 --> 01:40:16,144
Yes, it's london zoo.
2053
01:40:16,178 --> 01:40:17,745
Listen.
I've had enough.
2054
01:40:17,779 --> 01:40:19,013
I really have.
2055
01:40:19,047 --> 01:40:20,515
Is that this
woman's dog?
2056
01:40:20,548 --> 01:40:22,350
We've had these interruptions
on this set...
2057
01:40:22,384 --> 01:40:23,685
I did it.
2058
01:40:25,053 --> 01:40:25,987
Nicotine,
nicotine pip-Squeak.
2059
01:40:26,020 --> 01:40:27,155
Listen, sergei.
2060
01:40:27,189 --> 01:40:28,390
This is not
the steppes of russia.
2061
01:40:28,423 --> 01:40:31,359
This is
the united states of america.
2062
01:40:37,432 --> 01:40:40,068
So zanuck says give him
a death scene.
2063
01:40:40,102 --> 01:40:41,669
That'll win an oscar.
2064
01:40:41,703 --> 01:40:43,871
This guy couldn't play dead
if you cremated him.
2065
01:40:43,905 --> 01:40:45,039
Move over.
2066
01:40:45,073 --> 01:40:46,874
What's wrong,
dottie?
2067
01:40:46,908 --> 01:40:48,543
I never worked
on a picture that i liked,
2068
01:40:48,576 --> 01:40:52,080
And i never worked on a picture
that liked me.
2069
01:40:52,114 --> 01:40:53,248
Dottie,
i need a line.
2070
01:40:53,281 --> 01:40:54,882
There's a guy
standing on a ledge,
2071
01:40:54,916 --> 01:40:56,484
And his wife's
got to say something.
2072
01:40:56,518 --> 01:40:58,653
No. Let her push
the son of a bitch
2073
01:40:58,686 --> 01:40:59,754
Without speaking.
2074
01:40:59,787 --> 01:41:01,089
Over!
2075
01:41:01,123 --> 01:41:02,990
Hey, dottie.
Saw alan on the lot this morning
2076
01:41:03,024 --> 01:41:04,592
Standing right
beside wardrobe.
2077
01:41:04,626 --> 01:41:07,329
Wearing a dress,
no doubt.
2078
01:41:07,362 --> 01:41:08,563
Hi, harry.
2079
01:41:08,596 --> 01:41:09,764
Harry.
2080
01:41:09,797 --> 01:41:10,832
You guys hear
about bob benchley?
2081
01:41:10,865 --> 01:41:11,499
No.
2082
01:41:11,533 --> 01:41:12,400
Hi, dottie.
2083
01:41:12,434 --> 01:41:14,102
Hey, listen, harry.
I need a line.
2084
01:41:14,136 --> 01:41:15,603
Forget about that.
2085
01:41:15,637 --> 01:41:17,105
Harry,
what about benchley?
2086
01:41:17,139 --> 01:41:18,473
He, uh, he died.
2087
01:41:20,007 --> 01:41:22,810
You're kidding.
2088
01:41:22,844 --> 01:41:25,079
How?
2089
01:41:25,113 --> 01:41:27,949
Cirrhosis of the liver,
hemorrhaging.
2090
01:41:27,982 --> 01:41:29,083
They say
marc connelly
2091
01:41:29,117 --> 01:41:30,952
Ran around
the stork club
2092
01:41:30,985 --> 01:41:32,454
Looking for
blood donors.
2093
01:41:32,487 --> 01:41:33,955
God, benchley.
2094
01:41:33,988 --> 01:41:36,758
I talked to him just
before i left town.
2095
01:41:36,791 --> 01:41:38,260
Dottie...
2096
01:41:38,293 --> 01:41:40,295
Oh, that's
just dandy.
2097
01:41:44,999 --> 01:41:46,968
Well, if it isn't
mr. Dorothy parker.
2098
01:41:47,001 --> 01:41:48,270
Hello, dottie.
2099
01:41:48,303 --> 01:41:50,272
Thought i might
as well
2100
01:41:50,305 --> 01:41:52,574
Get my things
out of your way.
2101
01:41:52,607 --> 01:41:53,941
What's in here?
This is mine, you shit!
2102
01:41:53,975 --> 01:41:55,277
You queer!
2103
01:41:55,310 --> 01:41:56,944
You can't use that anymore,
and you know it.
2104
01:41:56,978 --> 01:42:00,014
Oh, surely not because of your
wartime adventures in london.
2105
01:42:00,047 --> 01:42:01,683
Everybody knows
it's a lie, dottie,
2106
01:42:01,716 --> 01:42:02,917
And so do you.
2107
01:42:02,950 --> 01:42:04,118
Just because you
fucked another woman
2108
01:42:04,152 --> 01:42:06,554
Doesn't make it
all better.
2109
01:42:06,588 --> 01:42:08,022
Good-Bye, darling.
2110
01:42:08,055 --> 01:42:09,357
Oh, that's right.
2111
01:42:09,391 --> 01:42:12,360
Take your toys and gallop away,
sidesaddle!
2112
01:42:12,394 --> 01:42:15,163
And don't forget to bore a
hole in the hobby-Horse,
2113
01:42:15,197 --> 01:42:17,365
You fucking idiot!
2114
01:42:40,422 --> 01:42:45,493
Oh, fred.
2115
01:42:45,527 --> 01:42:48,496
Dear fred.
2116
01:42:48,530 --> 01:42:53,301
You lovely, wonderful shit.
2117
01:43:50,858 --> 01:43:53,094
Department of mass hysteria
and indecision.
2118
01:43:53,127 --> 01:43:55,663
The new year you ordered
is due shortly
2119
01:43:55,697 --> 01:43:58,300
And may be picked up
at the will-Call desk.
2120
01:43:58,333 --> 01:44:00,101
Where have you been
all evening?
2121
01:44:00,134 --> 01:44:01,336
Hello, charlie!
2122
01:44:01,369 --> 01:44:03,271
Anyone seen
my noisemakers?
2123
01:44:03,305 --> 01:44:04,606
You are
a noisemaker!
2124
01:44:04,639 --> 01:44:06,341
Where are my damn
noisemakers?
2125
01:44:06,374 --> 01:44:08,610
I think she likes
you better.
2126
01:44:08,643 --> 01:44:12,213
Yes. Meow, too.
2127
01:44:12,246 --> 01:44:15,049
James,
my stomach hurts.
2128
01:44:15,082 --> 01:44:18,353
I like champagne,
but it doesn't like me.
2129
01:44:18,386 --> 01:44:19,554
Oh, you're just being
modest, mary.
2130
01:44:19,587 --> 01:44:22,524
Ha ha ha!
2131
01:44:22,557 --> 01:44:24,025
Are you nauseous,
dear?
2132
01:44:24,058 --> 01:44:24,859
My stomach.
2133
01:44:24,892 --> 01:44:26,060
Your stomach.
2134
01:44:26,093 --> 01:44:28,563
Well,
pardon my pussy.
2135
01:44:28,596 --> 01:44:31,333
Everywhere i draw breath
is a social hall!
2136
01:44:31,366 --> 01:44:32,967
Then go breathe
somewhere else!
2137
01:44:33,000 --> 01:44:35,803
I'm sure
jane means...
2138
01:44:35,837 --> 01:44:36,971
Aleck!
2139
01:44:37,004 --> 01:44:38,940
If you were a true
gentleman, aleck,
2140
01:44:38,973 --> 01:44:40,041
You'd pinch my ass!
2141
01:44:40,074 --> 01:44:42,176
Aleck,
what the hell?
2142
01:44:42,209 --> 01:44:43,277
Calm down,
please.
2143
01:44:43,311 --> 01:44:46,348
Will you please
calm down, aleck?
2144
01:44:48,516 --> 01:44:51,519
didn't i give you
a dollar?
2145
01:44:55,723 --> 01:44:58,192
You know, charlie,
2146
01:44:58,225 --> 01:45:02,196
I actually made-Believe
we'd be married someday.
2147
01:45:02,229 --> 01:45:04,499
I even decided
what to wear.
2148
01:45:04,532 --> 01:45:07,201
Ah, jesus christ,
dot.
2149
01:45:07,234 --> 01:45:11,506
A rather pinkish gray
with butterfly orchids.
2150
01:45:11,539 --> 01:45:13,307
Your passion
for unhappiness
2151
01:45:13,341 --> 01:45:16,511
Is goddamn endless.
2152
01:45:16,544 --> 01:45:19,146
But you're fine,
aren't you?
2153
01:45:19,180 --> 01:45:21,048
You're all well.
2154
01:45:23,250 --> 01:45:24,652
Just wish you wouldn't
sentimentalize
2155
01:45:24,686 --> 01:45:27,021
All the time.
2156
01:45:27,054 --> 01:45:33,561
And i wish i never learned
to take off my clothes.
2157
01:45:49,276 --> 01:45:51,045
Happy new year, charlie.
2158
01:45:51,078 --> 01:45:52,580
Dottie.
2159
01:45:54,281 --> 01:45:57,419
Happy new year,
john peter.
2160
01:45:57,452 --> 01:46:00,922
Harpo,
you'll appreciate this.
2161
01:46:00,955 --> 01:46:05,059
The wisdom tooth...
A comedy in three acts.
2162
01:46:05,092 --> 01:46:07,094
Act one...
2163
01:46:07,128 --> 01:46:08,195
Ha ha ha!
2164
01:46:08,229 --> 01:46:10,131
Scene one.
2165
01:46:10,164 --> 01:46:11,466
It gets better.
2166
01:46:11,499 --> 01:46:13,100
"A men's washroom.
2167
01:46:13,134 --> 01:46:17,104
Four washbasins are against the wall,
running diagonally."
2168
01:46:20,207 --> 01:46:21,776
Why would i
ruin the night?
2169
01:46:21,809 --> 01:46:23,277
Oh, here.
2170
01:46:23,310 --> 01:46:24,579
Here. One of
your friends.
2171
01:46:24,612 --> 01:46:26,180
Why don't you tell her
about the fact
2172
01:46:26,213 --> 01:46:27,749
That you want
to leave.
2173
01:46:27,782 --> 01:46:30,785
Too late, mary.
2174
01:46:30,818 --> 01:46:31,653
Hmm?
2175
01:46:31,686 --> 01:46:32,587
Oh!
2176
01:46:32,620 --> 01:46:34,422
Did he swallow a nut?
2177
01:46:34,456 --> 01:46:36,023
Have you been
drinking, ross?
2178
01:46:36,057 --> 01:46:37,324
Heavily.
2179
01:46:37,358 --> 01:46:39,761
Don't, for a minute,
think i'm not incoherent.
2180
01:46:39,794 --> 01:46:41,796
I would never
not think that.
2181
01:46:41,829 --> 01:46:42,897
There you two are.
2182
01:46:42,930 --> 01:46:44,799
I've been toothing this
comb with a fine...
2183
01:46:44,832 --> 01:46:47,234
Put us back together,
dr. Benchley.
2184
01:46:47,268 --> 01:46:48,970
We're broken into
little bits.
2185
01:46:49,003 --> 01:46:50,371
What seems to be
the problem?
2186
01:46:50,404 --> 01:46:51,539
You, sir, appear
pained enough
2187
01:46:51,573 --> 01:46:54,275
To have appeared
in my column.
2188
01:46:54,308 --> 01:46:57,579
I suppose i should say something
amusing about leaving life,
2189
01:46:57,612 --> 01:47:01,282
But i'm afraid i don't find
any of this amusing anymore.
2190
01:47:01,315 --> 01:47:03,184
what is everybody
staring at?
2191
01:47:03,217 --> 01:47:05,386
That's rude of me.
2192
01:47:05,419 --> 01:47:06,888
Mr. Benchley.
2193
01:47:06,921 --> 01:47:08,022
Mr. Sherwood.
2194
01:47:08,055 --> 01:47:09,491
Mrs. Parker.
2195
01:47:18,165 --> 01:47:20,735
Where are you going,
robert?
2196
01:47:24,238 --> 01:47:27,609
Couldn't have stood another
moment of him looking at me,
2197
01:47:27,642 --> 01:47:30,211
Thinking of what a public
clown i turned out to be.
2198
01:47:30,244 --> 01:47:31,713
Oh, fred.
2199
01:47:31,746 --> 01:47:34,716
That's not what
he was thinking at all.
2200
01:47:34,749 --> 01:47:36,551
Hello.
2201
01:47:40,254 --> 01:47:41,923
Bobby.
2202
01:47:41,956 --> 01:47:43,457
Mademoiselle gerard!
2203
01:47:43,491 --> 01:47:45,727
How did it go?
2204
01:47:45,760 --> 01:47:47,729
Great.
2205
01:47:47,762 --> 01:47:50,932
Isn't he just the bee's knees,
dottie?
2206
01:47:50,965 --> 01:47:52,233
Did you miss me?
2207
01:47:52,266 --> 01:47:54,235
Does the sun
miss the stars?
2208
01:47:54,268 --> 01:47:56,237
Did jackson
miss-Issippi?
2209
01:47:56,270 --> 01:47:57,572
Cain miss abel?
2210
01:47:57,605 --> 01:48:00,241
What do you say
we go wild tonight?
2211
01:48:00,274 --> 01:48:01,943
If you insist.
2212
01:48:01,976 --> 01:48:03,945
Little miss muffet?
2213
01:48:03,978 --> 01:48:06,147
Christmas cheer?
2214
01:48:06,180 --> 01:48:08,249
I try to worry,
mrs. Parker,
2215
01:48:08,282 --> 01:48:10,217
But i can't.
2216
01:48:10,251 --> 01:48:12,253
Isn't anybody happy?
2217
01:48:12,286 --> 01:48:14,822
I feel sick
to my stomach.
2218
01:48:16,490 --> 01:48:19,827
Tolstoy? I always found
tolstoy rather dreary!
2219
01:48:19,861 --> 01:48:20,995
Poor alvan.
2220
01:48:21,028 --> 01:48:22,864
You're right.
Tolstoy isn't very cheerful.
2221
01:48:22,897 --> 01:48:23,731
And sentimental!
2222
01:48:23,765 --> 01:48:25,232
Nor sentimental,
for that matter.
2223
01:48:25,266 --> 01:48:26,768
What's he written?
2224
01:48:26,801 --> 01:48:28,770
He's a doctor,
a psychotherapist.
2225
01:48:28,803 --> 01:48:30,805
A good one, too,
actually.
2226
01:48:30,838 --> 01:48:34,275
Because of his understanding
of how pure sorrow
2227
01:48:34,308 --> 01:48:37,144
Is no more possible
than pure joy.
2228
01:48:37,178 --> 01:48:39,781
That's hardly
reasonable!
2229
01:48:39,814 --> 01:48:41,783
your friends
don't care
2230
01:48:41,816 --> 01:48:44,118
For the russians,
i'm afraid.
2231
01:48:44,151 --> 01:48:45,787
Come on, doctor.
2232
01:48:45,820 --> 01:48:48,790
Let's talk about
my sorrow and joy.
2233
01:48:48,823 --> 01:48:51,793
You don't mind,
do you, paula?
2234
01:48:51,826 --> 01:48:53,294
Why, no.
2235
01:48:53,327 --> 01:48:55,296
Well, at least
i asked.
2236
01:48:55,329 --> 01:48:57,799
i'm a-Freud of that man.
2237
01:48:59,834 --> 01:49:02,103
Someone pay attention
to me!
2238
01:49:09,844 --> 01:49:15,082
My great fear is being
a bitter old woman
2239
01:49:15,116 --> 01:49:16,818
Alone in her room,
2240
01:49:16,851 --> 01:49:19,453
Who, despite
all requests for rain,
2241
01:49:19,486 --> 01:49:23,825
Will meet her maker
on a bright, sunny day.
2242
01:49:25,559 --> 01:49:28,329
I don't know if this is
a terrible tragedy
2243
01:49:28,362 --> 01:49:30,164
Or a big fucking joke.
2244
01:49:37,071 --> 01:49:38,673
Would you like
a nut?
2245
01:49:38,706 --> 01:49:39,607
Could you just
close the door
2246
01:49:39,641 --> 01:49:42,877
On your way out,
please?
2247
01:49:45,379 --> 01:49:47,414
Oh, sit here.
2248
01:49:47,448 --> 01:49:49,183
Please.
2249
01:49:55,222 --> 01:49:56,891
Happy new year,
harp.
2250
01:50:09,370 --> 01:50:12,907
Well...what are you
waiting for?
2251
01:50:14,909 --> 01:50:16,911
Analyze.
2252
01:50:20,915 --> 01:50:24,318
Analysis is
a serious business.
2253
01:50:24,351 --> 01:50:26,220
Would it help
if i cried?
2254
01:50:26,253 --> 01:50:27,889
One needs an office,
2255
01:50:27,922 --> 01:50:29,056
A certain amount
of formality.
2256
01:50:29,090 --> 01:50:31,158
What if i put on
a more expensive dress
2257
01:50:31,192 --> 01:50:33,895
And then cried?
2258
01:50:33,928 --> 01:50:35,429
Well, it's safe
to suggest
2259
01:50:35,462 --> 01:50:37,331
That you
examine the need
2260
01:50:37,364 --> 01:50:38,432
You and your
colleagues feel
2261
01:50:38,465 --> 01:50:40,668
To spend so much time
together.
2262
01:50:40,702 --> 01:50:43,771
They're shits, really,
except for mr. Benchley.
2263
01:50:43,805 --> 01:50:48,042
That's quite a thing to say
about your best friends.
2264
01:50:50,144 --> 01:50:51,946
Please be sweet.
2265
01:50:53,447 --> 01:50:56,918
Don't know why
i can't work anymore,
2266
01:50:56,951 --> 01:51:01,122
Why life is
so goddamned painful.
2267
01:51:03,958 --> 01:51:07,594
If we identify your inability to
work as the primary problem...
2268
01:51:07,628 --> 01:51:08,930
It's a tossup, really,
between that
2269
01:51:08,963 --> 01:51:11,432
And my inability
to get laid.
2270
01:51:11,465 --> 01:51:13,067
Then we ought to examine
2271
01:51:13,100 --> 01:51:15,436
How your energy
is being spent instead.
2272
01:51:15,469 --> 01:51:17,138
What else?
2273
01:51:17,171 --> 01:51:18,873
Your drinking.
2274
01:51:18,906 --> 01:51:21,608
Oh, it doesn't do me
much good anymore,
2275
01:51:21,642 --> 01:51:24,111
But that's about
the extent of it.
2276
01:51:24,145 --> 01:51:25,947
I have to disagree.
2277
01:51:25,980 --> 01:51:28,415
Well,
maybe it's the bad whiskey i've been getting.
2278
01:51:28,449 --> 01:51:29,550
May i say,
2279
01:51:29,583 --> 01:51:31,152
The real stuff never
made me suffer.
2280
01:51:31,185 --> 01:51:34,221
It's not what you're suffering,
mrs. Parker.
2281
01:51:34,255 --> 01:51:34,989
It's what
you're missing.
2282
01:51:35,022 --> 01:51:36,090
In my opinion,
2283
01:51:36,123 --> 01:51:40,261
You and your friends
are missing a great deal.
2284
01:51:40,294 --> 01:51:41,896
It's a sign
of insecurity,
2285
01:51:41,929 --> 01:51:45,399
This compulsion to be
constantly with each other,
2286
01:51:45,432 --> 01:51:46,968
To be constantly
entertaining,
2287
01:51:47,001 --> 01:51:49,837
But never discussing one subject for long,
never in-Depth.
2288
01:51:49,871 --> 01:51:53,574
The serious side of
your nature is lost...
2289
01:51:53,607 --> 01:51:55,576
Your purpose.
2290
01:51:55,609 --> 01:52:00,581
And then
you can't write.
2291
01:52:00,614 --> 01:52:01,682
I think life
is something more
2292
01:52:01,715 --> 01:52:03,017
Than being able
to breathe.
2293
01:52:04,618 --> 01:52:07,288
Do i have to
believe that
2294
01:52:07,321 --> 01:52:08,422
To feel better?
2295
01:52:10,324 --> 01:52:13,627
Tell me about
your mother.
2296
01:52:13,660 --> 01:52:17,131
She died
when you were 5.
2297
01:52:17,164 --> 01:52:20,601
Actually,
it was a month before my 5th birthday.
2298
01:52:20,634 --> 01:52:23,304
Oh...
2299
01:52:23,337 --> 01:52:26,107
Sometimes i...
2300
01:52:26,140 --> 01:52:31,178
I think i catch a
bit of her voice,
2301
01:52:31,212 --> 01:52:33,614
Her scent,
2302
01:52:33,647 --> 01:52:36,317
Something
she once said,
2303
01:52:36,350 --> 01:52:41,823
And then...
it slips away.
2304
01:52:41,856 --> 01:52:45,893
Oh,
i suppose she loved me and kept me warm
2305
01:52:45,927 --> 01:52:46,627
And made sure
i ate roughage,
2306
01:52:46,660 --> 01:52:48,162
But the, uh...
2307
01:52:49,663 --> 01:52:51,132
The truth is,
2308
01:52:51,165 --> 01:52:56,070
I barely remember
a thing about her.
2309
01:52:56,103 --> 01:52:57,404
That's no reason
to be afraid.
2310
01:52:57,438 --> 01:52:59,373
It's good to remember.
2311
01:52:59,406 --> 01:53:01,308
But i'm not
remembering.
2312
01:53:01,342 --> 01:53:04,611
I'm just guessing.
2313
01:53:04,645 --> 01:53:07,114
I'm guessing
everything.
2314
01:53:07,148 --> 01:53:09,616
It would be
different, if only...
2315
01:53:09,650 --> 01:53:11,618
Ah...
2316
01:53:11,652 --> 01:53:14,455
If only this.
If only that.
2317
01:53:18,159 --> 01:53:20,327
Where are you going,
dorothy?
2318
01:53:20,361 --> 01:53:22,129
I'm returning
to my room.
2319
01:53:22,163 --> 01:53:24,631
My anxieties are waiting.
They miss me.
2320
01:53:24,665 --> 01:53:27,334
You think
that's a good idea?
2321
01:53:27,368 --> 01:53:28,635
I like my room.
2322
01:53:28,669 --> 01:53:30,637
Everything i need
is there.
2323
01:53:30,671 --> 01:53:32,940
Don't you think
you should stay here
2324
01:53:32,974 --> 01:53:35,943
Until you face this pain
more directly?
2325
01:53:35,977 --> 01:53:38,645
Face it
more directly?
2326
01:53:38,679 --> 01:53:41,148
Um, i face it every day.
2327
01:53:41,182 --> 01:53:43,650
I fall in love
with married men,
2328
01:53:43,684 --> 01:53:45,853
But i do it on purpose.
2329
01:53:45,887 --> 01:53:49,090
I drink too much,
and that's because i'm thirsty.
2330
01:53:49,123 --> 01:53:56,663
And i write doodads because
it's a doodad kind of town.
2331
01:53:56,697 --> 01:54:01,668
It's, um, nothing...
personal, doctor,
2332
01:54:01,702 --> 01:54:04,371
But i think
my version of pain
2333
01:54:04,405 --> 01:54:06,207
Is more fun than yours.
2334
01:54:08,775 --> 01:54:10,511
You're up.
2335
01:54:12,246 --> 01:54:13,680
Mr. Kaufman.
2336
01:54:13,714 --> 01:54:15,883
I'm surprised
to see you here.
2337
01:54:15,917 --> 01:54:17,084
You, me,
all of manhattan,
2338
01:54:17,118 --> 01:54:21,188
And parts of schenectady,
i'm sure.
2339
01:54:21,222 --> 01:54:23,524
Did she say anything
about me?
2340
01:54:46,247 --> 01:54:49,716
Just a little one...
while we're up.
2341
01:54:49,750 --> 01:54:52,719
My dear, do let me
congratulate you.
2342
01:54:52,753 --> 01:54:54,388
You must be
terribly proud...
2343
01:54:54,421 --> 01:54:55,722
Who?
2344
01:54:55,756 --> 01:54:57,224
Dorothy parker.
2345
01:54:57,258 --> 01:54:58,859
Dorothy parker, yeah,
the writer.
2346
01:54:58,892 --> 01:55:00,861
I worked with
her and her husband
2347
01:55:00,894 --> 01:55:03,030
In hollywood
a long time ago.
2348
01:55:03,064 --> 01:55:06,200
They had just
remarried.
2349
01:55:06,233 --> 01:55:07,901
Didn't she commit
suicide?
2350
01:55:07,935 --> 01:55:09,603
Shh. No, no, no.
2351
01:55:09,636 --> 01:55:10,972
What? I'm just
asking a question.
2352
01:55:11,005 --> 01:55:12,473
She was very famous.
2353
01:55:12,506 --> 01:55:15,809
For writing movies or for
marrying the same guy twice?
2354
01:55:15,842 --> 01:55:17,311
For having lunch,
mostly.
2355
01:55:17,344 --> 01:55:19,180
Ha ha ha!
2356
01:55:19,213 --> 01:55:21,382
is that a double?
2357
01:55:21,415 --> 01:55:24,218
You didn't ask
for a double, lady.
2358
01:55:24,251 --> 01:55:26,020
I didn't?
2359
01:55:26,053 --> 01:55:29,756
I meant to.
I promise you.
2360
01:55:29,790 --> 01:55:31,959
I'll get you
another one.
2361
01:55:35,296 --> 01:55:38,765
How about
a little tummy rub?
2362
01:55:38,799 --> 01:55:42,869
Part of the romance
of digestion.
2363
01:55:42,903 --> 01:55:44,838
I want you to meet her.
Just for a second.
2364
01:55:44,871 --> 01:55:49,043
It's all right.
Go ahead. Sit.
2365
01:55:49,076 --> 01:55:51,778
Mrs. Parker, i hope
we're not disturbing you.
2366
01:55:51,812 --> 01:55:53,480
Well...
2367
01:55:53,514 --> 01:55:54,982
Do you remember me?
2368
01:55:55,016 --> 01:55:57,284
Honey,
i don't remember this morning.
2369
01:55:57,318 --> 01:55:58,785
Ha ha ha!
2370
01:55:58,819 --> 01:56:00,487
I'm fred hunter.
2371
01:56:00,521 --> 01:56:02,423
I acted in a picture
2372
01:56:02,456 --> 01:56:04,791
That you and your husband,
alan campbell,
2373
01:56:04,825 --> 01:56:06,427
Wrote several
years ago...
2374
01:56:06,460 --> 01:56:08,495
Flight to nowhere.
2375
01:56:08,529 --> 01:56:10,497
Well, i got
cut out, but...
2376
01:56:10,531 --> 01:56:11,498
Honey,
if i wrote it,
2377
01:56:11,532 --> 01:56:14,001
They cut me out,
too.
2378
01:56:14,035 --> 01:56:16,270
These are two friends
of mine...Marcy and june.
2379
01:56:16,303 --> 01:56:18,805
This is mrs. Parker,
dorothy parker.
2380
01:56:18,839 --> 01:56:20,774
Can we buy you
a drink?
2381
01:56:20,807 --> 01:56:22,443
Well, sure.
Ha ha ha!
2382
01:56:22,476 --> 01:56:25,812
Can we get another drink
here for mrs. Parker?
2383
01:56:25,846 --> 01:56:27,048
I was just
telling them
2384
01:56:27,081 --> 01:56:29,516
About the old
hollywood days
2385
01:56:29,550 --> 01:56:31,018
And about your husband.
2386
01:56:31,052 --> 01:56:33,120
He was so, so nice to me
when we worked together.
2387
01:56:33,154 --> 01:56:36,757
I don't doubt it.
2388
01:56:36,790 --> 01:56:38,492
Unhappily...Oh,
i beg your pardon.
2389
01:56:38,525 --> 01:56:40,127
Happily, i'm away
from hollywood now,
2390
01:56:40,161 --> 01:56:45,366
And i don't have to
hear about that crap.
2391
01:56:45,399 --> 01:56:47,368
Whatever happened
to that director?
2392
01:56:47,401 --> 01:56:48,569
What was his name?
I can't remember.
2393
01:56:48,602 --> 01:56:50,937
He went to jail,
2394
01:56:50,971 --> 01:56:54,575
For being an american
in the u.S. Of a.
2395
01:56:54,608 --> 01:56:56,510
Oh, really. Jail?
2396
01:56:56,543 --> 01:56:58,879
Oh, you mean
because of the...Right.
2397
01:56:58,912 --> 01:57:00,914
Thank you.
2398
01:57:00,947 --> 01:57:03,550
Did you, uh,
i mean...
2399
01:57:03,584 --> 01:57:05,286
Oh, no, no, dear.
2400
01:57:05,319 --> 01:57:09,090
But i bought a new hat,
just in case.
2401
01:57:09,123 --> 01:57:10,691
Well, there's plenty
of money in hollywood
2402
01:57:10,724 --> 01:57:12,025
To buy things with.
2403
01:57:12,059 --> 01:57:13,560
Oh, hollywood.
2404
01:57:13,594 --> 01:57:14,828
Money isn't real.
2405
01:57:14,861 --> 01:57:16,097
It's like...
2406
01:57:16,130 --> 01:57:17,898
Well,
i don't know what the money is like.
2407
01:57:17,931 --> 01:57:20,467
It's like small ice
in your hand.
2408
01:57:20,501 --> 01:57:23,036
We got to go.
2409
01:57:23,070 --> 01:57:25,106
Oh, o.K. Great.
2410
01:57:25,139 --> 01:57:26,873
Mrs. Parker,
we're on our way
2411
01:57:26,907 --> 01:57:27,841
To a movie.
2412
01:57:27,874 --> 01:57:29,510
Would you like
to join us?
2413
01:57:29,543 --> 01:57:32,679
Why were you just asking
me about hollywood?
2414
01:57:32,713 --> 01:57:35,349
The thing has come down
on me like a curtain,
2415
01:57:35,382 --> 01:57:37,684
And i don't want to
remember those things.
2416
01:57:37,718 --> 01:57:38,719
Why are you trying
2417
01:57:38,752 --> 01:57:40,020
To split these
curtains to me...
2418
01:57:40,053 --> 01:57:43,557
Just a nice woman
trying to talk to you?
2419
01:57:43,590 --> 01:57:44,858
We're going
to be late.
2420
01:57:44,891 --> 01:57:47,994
O.K. Well, anyway...
2421
01:57:48,028 --> 01:57:49,863
Fred...
2422
01:57:49,896 --> 01:57:53,134
Always late.
2423
01:57:53,167 --> 01:57:55,169
Someone said
they'd have to keep
2424
01:57:55,202 --> 01:57:59,340
Heaven open
after hours for him.
2425
01:57:59,373 --> 01:58:01,642
Ha.
2426
01:58:01,675 --> 01:58:04,845
Well, mrs. Parker,
it's a pleasure to see you.
2427
01:58:04,878 --> 01:58:07,681
You look...
It's nice to see you.
2428
01:58:15,422 --> 01:58:17,191
Well...
2429
01:58:19,126 --> 01:58:22,829
A dependable
fact-Of-Life cliche...
2430
01:58:22,863 --> 01:58:27,701
Everything's always worse
than you thought it would be.
2431
01:58:46,920 --> 01:58:49,356
We are here to honor
dorothy parker
2432
01:58:49,390 --> 01:58:52,259
Because the clean wit
of her verse
2433
01:58:52,293 --> 01:58:54,995
And the sharp perceptions
in her stories
2434
01:58:55,028 --> 01:58:58,432
Have produced a brilliant record
of our times.
2435
01:58:58,465 --> 01:59:01,134
Because of mrs. Parker's
true talent,
2436
01:59:01,168 --> 01:59:04,137
Her early work gives us
as much pleasure today
2437
01:59:04,171 --> 01:59:06,440
As it did 30 years ago.
2438
01:59:06,473 --> 01:59:08,141
what horse shit,
2439
01:59:08,175 --> 01:59:10,143
With apologies
to the horses.
2440
01:59:10,177 --> 01:59:13,647
...happily names
dorothy parker
2441
01:59:13,680 --> 01:59:17,451
As this year's recipient of
the marjorie peabody waite award
2442
01:59:17,484 --> 01:59:20,654
For achievement
and integrity.
2443
01:59:53,520 --> 01:59:56,223
I never thought
i'd make it.
2444
02:01:48,201 --> 02:01:49,636
Do you miss the glamour
of the jazz age?
2445
02:01:49,670 --> 02:01:54,307
Glamour? They ought to
call it the dingy decade.
2446
02:01:54,341 --> 02:01:56,242
What disturbs you most
about american culture,
2447
02:01:56,276 --> 02:01:58,345
Mrs. Parker?
2448
02:01:58,379 --> 02:02:02,383
Stupidity, intolerance,
and segregation...
2449
02:02:02,416 --> 02:02:04,317
Particularly segregation.
2450
02:02:04,351 --> 02:02:07,454
Is it true that you
were involved in
2451
02:02:07,488 --> 02:02:08,622
The spanish
civil war?
2452
02:02:08,655 --> 02:02:10,791
Why do we have to
go into that?
2453
02:02:10,824 --> 02:02:12,993
Yes, i was!
2454
02:02:13,026 --> 02:02:16,463
Indeed,
i should like to say
2455
02:02:16,497 --> 02:02:20,333
It was the proudest thing
i've ever been of.
2456
02:02:20,367 --> 02:02:22,335
I was, for a time,
2457
02:02:22,369 --> 02:02:26,640
With the proudest people
i've ever been of.
2458
02:02:26,673 --> 02:02:29,843
And that doesn't
hurt you, you know.
2459
02:02:29,876 --> 02:02:33,346
What do you think of kerouac and
the beat generation writers?
2460
02:02:33,380 --> 02:02:37,851
Well, you'll...
You'll take him.
2461
02:02:37,884 --> 02:02:40,854
I think this thing of
the beat generation...
2462
02:02:40,887 --> 02:02:42,355
Do you mind?
2463
02:02:42,389 --> 02:02:44,357
I think it's
perfect nonsense,
2464
02:02:44,391 --> 02:02:46,292
And i think
in a couple of years,
2465
02:02:46,326 --> 02:02:47,728
They'll be forgotten.
2466
02:02:47,761 --> 02:02:51,565
But us, messy as we were
and all that,
2467
02:02:51,598 --> 02:02:53,400
We're not going to be
forgotten,
2468
02:02:53,434 --> 02:02:55,536
Because some of us
came out of it.
2469
02:02:55,569 --> 02:02:57,671
There came out benchley.
There came out fitzgerald.
2470
02:02:57,704 --> 02:02:59,239
There came out
hemingway.
2471
02:02:59,272 --> 02:03:00,674
There came out broun.
2472
02:03:00,707 --> 02:03:02,242
There came out
sherwood.
2473
02:03:02,275 --> 02:03:04,244
Well,
for heaven's sweet sake,
2474
02:03:04,277 --> 02:03:06,747
Who's coming out
of the beatniks?
2475
02:03:06,780 --> 02:03:10,283
All right. Kerouac.
All right. All right.
2476
02:03:10,316 --> 02:03:11,418
Ha ha ha!
2477
02:03:11,452 --> 02:03:12,486
Have you
thought about
2478
02:03:12,519 --> 02:03:14,254
What you'd like
to have written
2479
02:03:14,287 --> 02:03:16,256
On your tombstone,
mrs. Parker?
2480
02:03:16,289 --> 02:03:20,260
What a morbid thing
to ask a person.
2481
02:03:20,293 --> 02:03:24,264
You've just stolen
my heart.
2482
02:03:24,297 --> 02:03:27,434
Actually, i have
composed something
2483
02:03:27,468 --> 02:03:29,135
For my epitaph,
2484
02:03:29,169 --> 02:03:30,270
Something memorable,
i hope.
2485
02:03:30,303 --> 02:03:32,773
Well, i'm not
a bit surprised.
2486
02:03:32,806 --> 02:03:35,609
Are you going to let
me know what it is?
2487
02:03:45,318 --> 02:03:48,388
Come here, dear.
2488
02:03:48,421 --> 02:03:51,391
Off we go.
2489
02:03:51,424 --> 02:03:53,293
Excuse me.
2490
02:03:53,326 --> 02:03:55,596
What did she say?
169077
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