Original subtitles

- Listerine Antiseptic, Listerine Toothpaste,

and Prophylactic Toothbrushes present

America's favorite family comedy, "The Adventures

of Ozzie and Harriet."

So settle back in your easy chairs

and enjoy another delightful half-hour with all the Nelsons.

Ozzie Nelson, of course, plays the part

of the head of the Nelson household, Ozzie.

And here is his lovely wife, Harriet Nelson,

who keeps the family on an even keel.

Hello, Harriet.

The smiling young teenager we now see

is David Nelson, older of the two Nelson boys,

and played by David Nelson.

And here we have the youngest of the Nelsons,

the little guy with the twinkle in his eye,

Ricky Nelson, played by Ricky Nelson.

The Nelsons' next-door neighbor, Mr. Thornberry,

better known as Ozzie's pal Thorny,

is played by Don DeFore.

- Can I go to the movies this afternoon, Mom?

- Well, that's up to you, dear.

You've got your allowance.

- There's a neat picture playing.

- Can I go with you, David?

- Not this time, Ricky.

Some other time, maybe.

- Well, now, that's not very nice.

Why can't you take your little brother with you?

- I want to go with the guys.

- What am I?

A dame or something?

- Ricky, you stop that fresh talk.

- Why won't David let me go to the show with him?

- Well, I don't know.

David, why can't Ricky go along with you and the big boys?

- Well, gee, Mom, he always talks during the picture.

- So what?

Nobody ever listens to me.

- Well, I certainly don't think it would be nice

for you to go off and leave your little brother at home.

- That's what I keep telling him.

- Do the other boys object to Ricky?

- It's not that, Mom.

- Well, what is it then?

- Yeah, then what is it?

- Ricky, one at a time.

- It's just I'd like to go by myself.

- You'd think I was poisoned or something.

- I'm surprised at both of you.

You certainly don't act like brothers.

- There's another thing.

He's got his stuff piled all over my room.

- It's my room too, you know?

- And you got your comic books all over my bed.

- You told me to move them from your desk.

- Now, this is ridiculous.

You have a nice, big room, and I don't

see why you can't make some sort of an agreement.

- Why can't we have separate rooms of our own?

- Well, David, we don't live in the Coliseum.

You can't have a room for every member of the family.

- How about the attic?

Ricky could sleep up there.

- Oh, yeah?

You can sleep in the garage and turn on the motor

and asphysticate yourself.

- What's the big beef about?

- Oh, just a little brotherly love.

David won't take Ricky to the movies with him,

and now he's suggesting that they have separate rooms.

- It's not that I don't like Ricky, Pop.

- He hates me.

- I don't hate ya.

I just don't like taking Ricky every place I go.

- Let's think this thing over.

I think maybe David has a legitimate complaint here.

- Pop hates me, too.

Now, you know better than that.

You can be very fond of somebody, Ricky,

but still there are times when everybody likes to be alone.

- You mean you think that we ought to try to work out

separate rooms for the boys?

- Well, not necessarily, Harriet,

but I think it's something we ought to consider.

After all, fellas, when your Uncle Al and I were boys,

we each had a separate room.

- Did you want one?

- No, he did.

- Well, I don't know.

I think it's very nice for two brothers

to share the same room.

- It's OK with me.

I don't have to sleep with David.

- Well, look, Ricky, don't feel hurt about this.

- Heck no.

I think it'd be fun to sleep with you and Mom.

- That isn't exactly the arrangement I had in mind.

- Well, I think it'll be fine for them

to have separate rooms later on, but I

do think they can wait a few years.

- Well, Harriet, what you don't seem to realize

is that David's a pretty big guy now.

It isn't he isn't fond of Ricky, but, gosh, it's

not fair for a person to be saddled with somebody else.

- Now I'm a horse.

- Well, perhaps "saddled" isn't the proper word,

but there's nothing personal in this, Ricky.

I'm sure you'd feel the same way about it

if you were in David's place.

- Heck, I feel kind of lucky to have such a swell

little brother.

- But just tell me one thing.

Suppose they do decide to have separate rooms,

where are we going to find the extra room?

- Well, I think a little while ago,

David mentioned something about making a room up in the attic,

didn't he?

- Well, you certainly can't call our attic a bedroom.

- Well, golly, when I was a kid, I slept up in the attic.

My mother fixed it up so it was nice and warm and cozy.

- Little Orphan Annie sleeps up in the attic.

- Uh, not always.

Only in the wintertime, I think.

- You could call me Little Orphan Ricky.

- The whole thing is ridiculous.

We're certainly not going to make Ricky sleep in the attic.

- Well, I don't know, Harriet.

This wasn't my idea.

I'm just trying to help them solve the problem.

It's up to them.

- Would it really be my room?

- Look, why don't we just forget about it for now, huh?

- I think that's a good idea.

- No, I think it'd be fun to have a room of my own.

- Well, now, you heard your father, Ricky.

Let's forget the whole thing for a while.

- Well, Harriet, as long as they both like the idea,

maybe we ought to let them try it.

I mean, after all, Ricky probably gets tired of David,

too. - Who?

Me?

- I sure do, boy.

David always leaves his stuff piled under my stuff.

- That's your stuff piled on top of my stuff.

- Oh, yeah?

- Yeah.

- I can't go to sleep at night because David's playing

the radio with a pillow over it.

- You're not sleeping.

You're under the covers with a flashlight,

reading comic books. - Oh, yeah?

- Yeah. - Oh, yeah?

- Yeah. - Oh, yeah?

- Yeah.

- What a sparkling conversation.

Look, is this just a lot of talk or do

you really want separate rooms?

- No, I really want it, Mom.

- Me too, Mom.

Honest.

- You sure you won't get scared now, Ricky?

- Are you kidding?

- Well, there you are, Harriet.

- Well, it still seems silly to me.

- Oh, there's nothing silly about it.

The boys are just growing up.

They're fond of each other, but they're individuals.

They like to be alone once in a while too.

- Sure, I like Ricky, Mom.

I think he's the best little brother in the whole world.

I'm very fond of him.

- Let's not get mushy, David.

- I think it's very nice, David, and I'm sure he means it.

- Come on, let's go.

- What do you mean?

- Don't you want to go to the show with me?

- Oh, boy! Thanks, David.

- Oh, wait a minute, boys.

Now, for the last time, are you sure you want separate rooms?

- Sure, Mom, honest. - Me, too.

- Now, Ricky, you'll be sleeping in the attic.

- Oh, that's neat, boy.

- Come on, Rick.

Well, I guess that settles that.

- I hope we're doing the right thing.

See, first of all, we'll have to move that junk out

of the attic, and then we can take Ricky's bed up there.

And we can get that rug out of the garage.

And the attic will have to be cleaned,

and the windows washed.

- Uh, Harriet?

- Yes, dear?

- I think I may run down to the movies myself this afternoon.

- Hello?

- Hello, Harriet.

It's Aunt Ellen.

- Oh, hello, Aunt Ellen.

- Am I interrupting anything, dear?

- Oh, no.

I was just trying to figure out a little household problem.

- Oh?

Nothing serious, I hope.

- No.

No, it seems we're going to be needing

an extra room in our house.

Do you think I can make a bedroom out of the attic?

- Oh, Harriet, how wonderful.

This time, I hope it's a girl.

- Oh, no, Aunt Ellen, it's nothing like that.

It's just that Ozzie thought it might be a good idea

if the boys had separate rooms.

- You say Ozzie wants a separate room?

- No, not Ozzie.

Dave and Ricky want the separate rooms.

Personally, I didn't like the idea,

but Ozzie feels that everybody's entitled to a little privacy

if he wants it.

- Well, Harriet, you just tell Ozzie

that he can't have a separate room.

- Aunt Ellen, Ozzie doesn't want a separate room for himself.

- But, dear, you just told me he said

a person was entitled to a little privacy.

- Well, he was talking about David and Ricky.

I'm sure if he wanted a room of his own, he'd come right out

and say so.

- Well, maybe he would and maybe he wouldn't, but you

know how men are.

You just can't figure them out sometimes.

- I hope you're wrong, Aunt Ellen.

In the first place, I don't want Ozzie in a separate room,

especially not in the wintertime.

My feet get so cold, and his back is so nice and warm.

- Well, I wouldn't worry about it, dear.

I could be completely wrong.

- Well, that's just the trouble.

The more I think it over, the more I think you're right.

Aunt Ellen?

- Yes, dear?

- Do you know where I can buy a pair of electric snuggies?

- Oh, Harriet, have you seen my brown sweater any place?

You know, the one I got for Christmas?

- Well, I think it's in your shirt drawer under my blouses.

- No, I looked there and it's not there.

It's not in my sock drawer under your stockings either.

- I remember seeing it a few days ago.

Did you look in your closet?

- Yes, I did.

It's not there.

- I must remember to take my shoes out of there too.

- Oh, that's all right.

I stepped right over them.

- Did you happen to look under my hat box?

- Yeah, I looked there.

It's not there.

- Oh, look in the upstairs hall closet.

I put some of your things out there a few days ago.

I thought you might like to have a closet of your own.

- Oh, fine. I'll go look.

- Try on the second shelf under the bath towels.

- Oh, that's OK.

I really don't need it anyway.

- I certainly have my things all over the place, haven't I?

- Have you?

- My blouse is in your shirt drawer,

and my clothes in your closet.

You don't have any place to put your things.

- Well, sure I do.

I have the whole top drawer of our dresser.

Besides, you just have more things than I do.

- It must be annoying sometimes.

- No, no, not at all.

- You know, I've been thinking about the boys having

separate rooms.

- Well, I thought it was all decided.

- Oh, yes, I've just been thinking about it.

- Well, gee, I hope I didn't offend Ricky.

But, gosh, David's getting to be a pretty big guy now,

and it's a typical masculine desire

to want a little privacy.

- Oh?

- Now, you take me, for instance.

- You mean you'd like a separate room?

- Who, me?

- Well, that's what you said, wasn't it?

- No, no, no, no, I was talking about when I was a boy.

Golly, what would I want with a separate room?

- Well, you'd know where all your things are.

- Well, I know where they are now.

They're all around here, somewhere.

- That's what I mean.

You'd have a little privacy.

Are you sure you wouldn't enjoy a little more privacy?

- I've never even considered it.

- It wouldn't hurt to try it.

Let's see.

What could we turn into a spare bedroom?

How about the den?

We could fix that up very nicely.

- Yes, I guess that could be arranged.

- Might be a nice change for both of us.

- Well, yeah, I--

I wouldn't bother you with the light shining in your eyes

when I read in bed at night.

- I wouldn't have to fight for my share of the covers.

Well, I'll go see what can be done about the den.

- Oh, fine.

- "Ozzie and Harriet" will be back in just a moment.

- Hi, Oz.

- Oh, hiya, Thorny.

Hey, you're just in time to give me a hand.

- What's going on here?

- Well, that's a good question.

Harriet's decided she wants me to move into the den.

- Move into the den?

- Yes, sir, that's supposed to be my room from now on.

She wants us to have separate rooms.

Now, how do you figure a thing like that?

- Well, Oz, women are funny sometimes.

I guess it's just because they're women.

Evidently, Harriet's decided she wants a little more privacy.

- Well, yes, but why, Thorny?

Haven't I always been a good husband?

- Well, don't ask me, Oz.

I'm just your neighbor.

- Thorny, why should Harriet kick me out of my own room?

- Well, she probably has her reasons.

Look, Oz, I know you pretty well.

You probably got your clothes scattered all over the closet.

- Well, that's how much you know about it.

You should see how much room I've got in our closet.

I got two suits, a pair of pants, a top coat,

and a sport coat all on one hanger.

- You mean you're hogging a whole hanger?

- No, Thorny.

Don't be silly.

I mean, this is serious.

Why should Harriet want separate rooms

after all these years of happy married life?

- Well, that's easy enough to understand.

She probably wants to be alone once in a while.

Look, Oz, just because you and Harriet are married

doesn't make her chained to you.

- Sounds like my conversation with Ricky.

- Yeah?

Who's he married to?

- Don't be silly, Thorny.

This is serious.

- Oh, Oz, don't be so tragic.

This isn't the end.

If you play your cards right, maybe you'll

be able to sit next to her at dinner.

- The whole idea's ridiculous, Thorny, and you know it.

- Well, of course it is, Oz.

But you know as well as I do that when a woman makes up

her mind, brother, that is it.

Now, why don't you just go along with the idea for a few days

until she changes her mind?

- Well, evidently, I have no other choice.

- You know, this is something like the time Catherine

and I had an argument.

She made me sleep in the living room.

Brother, I didn't stay there long.

- Well, how'd you get her to change her mind?

- Well, about 10:30 that night, I turned on the radio.

And I had one of those murder mysteries tuned up

so she could hear it, you know, one of those real blood

curlers.

- Hey, that's pretty sly.

And she came rushing in to you?

- No, I went rushing out to her.

- Unfortunately, Harriet doesn't frighten quite so easily.

- Catherine doesn't either, but, brother, I sure do.

- Well, the only alternative I have to do

is just, as you say, go along with it

and hope that Harriet will change her mind.

- That's right, Oz.

She'll get tired of having the whole bedroom to herself.

- Sure, she will.

- Why?

- Well, I don't know.

You were the one who said it.

- You know, Oz, you know, you may enjoy sleeping in the den.

You'll be able to read in bed.

That's always fun.

- I suppose so. - Well, sure it is.

As a matter of fact, I got a book you can read.

Might cheer you up.

- What book is that?

- It's called "Live Alone and Like It."

- Come on, boys, time to take a bath and get ready for bed.

- Well, there's no bath up in the attic.

I guess I'm all through with baths, huh, Mom?

- I guess you might.

You just take your bath in the usual place.

- Well, Harriet, maybe if it's going

to cause all this confusion, we might better

forget about the whole deal, huh?

- Oh, there's no confusion, dear.

- Well, I mean--

Well, OK.

Well, come on, fellas.

I'm going to go up with your mother and get my pajamas.

- Oh, I put your pajamas on the couch in the den.

- Oh, yes, I saw those, Harriet, but they're those red-striped

pajamas.

And the couch in there is green, and I'm

afraid the colors would clash something awful.

So I thought I'd go up and get those ones

with the little dots on them and the sort of figures and stuff.

- Oh, well, you probably know best.

Come on, boys.

- Good night, Mom. - Good night, Dave.

- Good night, Rick. - Good night, David.

- Good night, Pop. - Good night, Dave.

- Good night, Mom. - Good night, Rick.

- Good night, Pop. - Good night, Rick.

- Good night, David.

- Good night, Rick.

- Good night, Harriet.

- Good night, dear.

- Good night, Rick.

- Good night, Pop.

- Good night, Dave.

- Good night, Pop.

- Well, I guess it's my turn.

Good night, everybody. - Good night, Mom.

- Good night, Mom. - Good night, dear.

Harriet.

Harriet.

- Hmm?

Oh, Ozzie.

- Were you asleep? - Oh, no.

What's the matter, dear?

- Oh, well, uh, turn on the light.

I brought you some books.

- Oh, thank you, dear.

- They'll help you go to sleep.

- Oh, how nice.

"Murder at Midnight," "Scream in the Dark."

Hmm, and "The Purple Monster."

- "Scream in the Dark" is a very good book.

This woman is sleeping alone in her room...

- Well, thank you, dear.

I don't feel much like reading right now.

- Oh, OK.

Well, I'll, uh, I'll go back downstairs to the den.

- Good night.

Ozzie?

- Y-- yes, dear?

What's the matter?

Frightened or lonely or something?

- You forgot to close the door.

- Sorry.

- Psst, Pop.

- David.

What are you doing out of bed so late, son?

- I didn't know whether I said good night to you,

and I came out to make sure.

- Oh, that's nice of you.

- Did I say good night to Ricky?

- Uh, yes, you did.

I remember you said good night to him twice.

- Did I say good night to Mom?

- Uh, yes, you did.

If it worries you, I can go in and say good night to her

again for you.

- Oh, that's all right.

Good night, Pop.

- Good night, son.

- Ozzie?

- Yes, it's just me.

I heard somebody walking around up here,

and I thought I'd make sure it was you.

Was it you? - Yes, it was me.

I looked in to see if the boys were all right.

- Oh, oh.

Are they all right?

- Mhm.

- Oh, that's good.

- You having trouble getting to sleep, dear?

- Yes, I am, Harriet.

- Well, look, here's a very nice book.

It has some nice poems in it.

- Oh.

Oh, yes.

Well, I'll take it back down to the den with me

and browse through it in case I have any more trouble getting

to sleep.

Good night again, dear.

- Good night, dear.

Ozzie?

- Oh, oh, Harriet.

What are you doing down here?

- I brought you an extra cover.

I thought you might be cold.

- Oh, well, gee, thank you very much.

That's very thoughtful.

- How can you sleep with all the lights on?

- Well, I couldn't go to sleep with the lights off,

and I thought maybe if I turn them all on,

the change might kind of sort of startle me to sleep.

- Say, that couch doesn't look too comfortable.

- Oh, it's OK.

The only thing, though, I have to put my feet up on the edge

there, but that's fine.

That is, it would be fine if I didn't have to put my head up

on the other arm.

But I finally balanced it all out.

I took those two cushions from that couch over there,

and it levels me right off.

- Well, here's your cover.

- Oh, just throw it on the floor.

That's where they all wind up anyway.

- Did you read the book I gave you?

- What book?

- Well, you know, the book I gave to you

upstairs in the bedroom.

You said you were going to browse through it.

- Oh!

Uh, no, I changed my mind.

It's right over there.

- Why don't you open it?

- Any particular reason?

- Well, yes, there's a special poem in there

I'd like you to see.

- There's a paper in here.

- Really?

- It's a poem in your handwriting.

"I read where a man was frozen when he decided

to sleep downstairs in the den.

So you better hurry up here fast.

Your electric blanket is on full blast."

Harriet, you wrote this for me?

- Took me all afternoon.

- Well, then why did you kick me out of our room

if you felt this way?

- Well, I thought that was what you wanted.

- Well, no.

I thought that's what you wanted.

- No, it was you.

And I can't say I blame you.

I have all my things getting in the way of your things

and pushing you out of the closet.

- Well, I don't mind, honest.

Besides, what about my snoring?

- Oh, I don't mind.

- You mean I do snore?

- Well, uh, well, no, it's not exactly snoring.

It's more like heavy breathing.

It's soothing.

Besides, I can always push you over on your side.

- David, what are you doing down here?

- I'm looking for Ricky.

- He's not down here, son. He's up in the attic.

Don't you remember? - No, he isn't, Pop.

I was just up there.

- Well, I wonder where he is.

- Golly, maybe he ran away from home.

- No, you can both stop worrying.

He's fast asleep.

But I must admit, I had a hard job finding him myself.

- Where is he, Mom?

- Well, the last I saw of him, David,

he was asleep in his sleeping bag, curled up under your bed.

Say, as long as we're up this late,

how without a nice cup of hot chocolate?

- That sounds like a wonderful idea.

And I think I'll have a sandwich, a cheese and tomato

on white bread.

- Can I have lettuce and tomato on toast?

- I think I'll have cheese and tomato on whole wheat.

- Make mine ham on rye.

- "Ozzie and Harriet" will be back in just a moment.

- Ozzie?

Ozzie?

- Y-- yes, dear?

- Could you turn over on your side?

- Oh, what's the matter?

Was I snoring?

- No, not exactly.

You're just breathing hard.

- Oh.

You know, I was having the strangest dream.

I dreamt I was lying down on the nice, warm sand.

It was in the summertime.

All of a sudden, somebody came along

and put two pieces of ice right on the small of my back.

- Well, isn't that strange?

I'm sorry I woke you up, dear.

Go back to sleep.

- No, that's OK.

Won't have any trouble doing that.

- Sorry, dear.

I thought you were asleep again.

I'll wait a while.

- Don't forget that a completely different episode

of "The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet"

is heard every Friday night on radio.

Consult your newspaper for time and radio station.

Next week, "The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet"

will be brought to you by Prophylactic toothbrushes,

Listerine toothpaste, and Listerine,

the most widely used antiseptic in the world Ellen Corby played

the part of Aunt Ellen.