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1
00:00:10,844 --> 00:00:15,406
Cory! Cory, guess what.
For New Year's Eve, I got us a limousine.
2
00:00:15,482 --> 00:00:18,645
- A limousine?
- Yeah, yeah. That's short for "limo."
3
00:00:19,920 --> 00:00:22,116
My Uncle Laslo's stretch limo.
4
00:00:22,189 --> 00:00:24,851
He's not busy that night,
so he's gonna be our chauffeur.
5
00:00:24,925 --> 00:00:28,190
Wow, that's great.
You know, Topanga's gonna love this.
6
00:00:28,262 --> 00:00:30,924
I mean, we can go to any party, anytime.
7
00:00:30,998 --> 00:00:36,027
- Boys. Quick, where are your parents?
- Oh, they're out, Mr. Feeny. Why?
8
00:00:36,103 --> 00:00:40,665
My cab to the airport is waiting,
and all I have is traveler's checks, so I...
9
00:00:40,741 --> 00:00:45,008
- You're asking us for money, aren't you?
- Yes, I've hit bottom.
10
00:00:45,078 --> 00:00:46,546
Welcome!
11
00:00:46,613 --> 00:00:47,739
(car horn)
12
00:00:47,814 --> 00:00:52,650
Please, gentlemen. I miss this flight,
I kiss my week in the Bahamas goodbye.
13
00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:55,518
Mr. Feeny, my man, you're in luck.
I just happen to have some of my...
14
00:00:55,589 --> 00:00:58,388
No, no, no, no.
Cor, please. Allow me.
15
00:00:59,860 --> 00:01:02,192
Would, uh, 20 bucks get you to the airport?
16
00:01:02,262 --> 00:01:04,162
I suppose.
17
00:01:04,231 --> 00:01:06,393
Cor, lend me 20 bucks.
18
00:01:06,466 --> 00:01:08,298
Come on.
19
00:01:10,304 --> 00:01:12,796
You know, if you had thought
about this ahead of time,
20
00:01:12,873 --> 00:01:16,207
- you wouldn't be in this situation.
- Yes, yes, yes.
21
00:01:16,276 --> 00:01:18,438
(car horn)
22
00:01:19,146 --> 00:01:21,240
- Thank you.
- Excuse me.
23
00:01:21,315 --> 00:01:25,252
- Thank you!
- Hey. Hey, you don't have to shout.
24
00:01:27,621 --> 00:01:30,181
Penne arrabbiata!
25
00:01:30,691 --> 00:01:34,525
Shawn, you just wished him
a spicy pasta.
26
00:01:37,965 --> 00:01:40,730
- I know.
- (Eric) Oh, my God!
27
00:01:40,801 --> 00:01:43,031
No! No!
28
00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:45,037
- No way!
- Eric, what's the matter?
29
00:01:45,105 --> 00:01:47,005
Hot you-you!
30
00:01:47,074 --> 00:01:51,307
- I heard screaming. Something wrong?
- Oh, Dad. Thanks for giving birth to me.
31
00:01:51,378 --> 00:01:54,905
- I was there too.
- Oh, right. Kudos, Mom.
32
00:01:54,982 --> 00:01:58,316
Get this. Your firstborn,
the fruit of your loom,
33
00:01:58,385 --> 00:02:02,083
has a dream date this New Year's Eve
with supermodel Rebecca-Alexa.
34
00:02:02,155 --> 00:02:04,988
Rebecca-Alexa? The jeans girl?
The one with the...?
35
00:02:05,058 --> 00:02:05,616
- Yes!
- And the...?
36
00:02:05,692 --> 00:02:06,420
- Yes!
- No!
37
00:02:06,493 --> 00:02:10,487
- Yes, yes, yes!
- Eric, how did you scam this?
38
00:02:10,564 --> 00:02:12,862
She's Jason's second cousin,
she's in from out of town, she needs a date,
39
00:02:12,933 --> 00:02:16,233
so she's going out with me!
I am just so happy!
40
00:02:16,303 --> 00:02:18,829
All those long, hard years of dating
finally paid off, huh?
41
00:02:18,905 --> 00:02:21,033
Well, not for her, but...
42
00:02:21,975 --> 00:02:24,842
Oh. No, just think.
I mean, when that clock strikes 12,
43
00:02:24,911 --> 00:02:27,710
I'll be kissing the famous blonde lips
of supermodel Rebecca-Alexa
44
00:02:27,781 --> 00:02:31,945
in front of all of Philly. Oh!
Mommy, Daddy... catch me.
45
00:02:36,890 --> 00:02:42,294
Amy! Let's go. New Year's Eve. Big night.
Fun, fun, fun. Let's get it over with!
46
00:02:42,362 --> 00:02:47,926
- (Amy) Alan, I'm still shaving my legs.
- Well, finish in the car. Let's go.
47
00:02:49,836 --> 00:02:54,603
OK, Dad. I need your honest opinion.
How do I look? Do I look fat?
48
00:02:54,675 --> 00:02:56,040
Eric, for the last time,
49
00:02:56,109 --> 00:03:00,307
she's just a girl, it's just a date
with someone who happens to be a model.
50
00:03:00,380 --> 00:03:02,474
I'm a fat-fatty-fat.
51
00:03:04,985 --> 00:03:07,113
Wow! Whoo! Hey.
52
00:03:07,187 --> 00:03:09,178
Well worth the wait.
53
00:03:09,256 --> 00:03:11,884
Which really wasn't that long.
54
00:03:11,958 --> 00:03:15,326
Oh, Eric. You look so handsome.
55
00:03:15,395 --> 00:03:17,386
- Really?
- Absolutely.
56
00:03:17,464 --> 00:03:19,057
Too handsome?
57
00:03:19,132 --> 00:03:21,066
All right, Mom.
I'm gonna wait outside for Shawn, OK?
58
00:03:21,134 --> 00:03:23,603
All right, stop. Wait.
Let me look at you. Come here.
59
00:03:23,670 --> 00:03:25,035
Mom...
60
00:03:25,105 --> 00:03:29,406
Oh, Alan. Remember when the two of 'em
would stay up late on New Year's Eve
61
00:03:29,476 --> 00:03:32,411
and eat popcorn and watch the ball drop?
62
00:03:32,479 --> 00:03:34,675
What has happened to my babies?
63
00:03:34,748 --> 00:03:37,581
Dad, she's not gonna cry now, is she?
64
00:03:37,651 --> 00:03:39,619
Amy. Mascara.
We haven't got that kind of time.
65
00:03:39,686 --> 00:03:41,916
Oh, admit it, boys.
Those were great times.
66
00:03:41,988 --> 00:03:43,456
Oh, sure. I mean, you guys got to go out.
67
00:03:43,523 --> 00:03:47,357
I was stuck here with Cory,
trying to pull Raisinets out of his nose.
68
00:03:47,427 --> 00:03:50,727
Yeah, if it wasn't for those shrimp forks,
they'd still be up there.
69
00:03:50,797 --> 00:03:53,232
You know, I haven't heard a thank-you.
70
00:03:53,300 --> 00:03:57,396
Now, guys, be careful tonight. You know,
New Year's Eve brings out all the crazies.
71
00:03:57,471 --> 00:04:01,465
Come on, everybody! Let's get crazy!
72
00:04:02,375 --> 00:04:06,573
- He's on my side.
- Cory, Uncle Laslo and our limo await.
73
00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:12,310
- Why does that limo look so strange?
- Maybe because it's a hearse.
74
00:04:12,385 --> 00:04:14,854
(car horn plays "Funeral March")
75
00:04:16,123 --> 00:04:17,352
- That's cool.
- Yeah.
76
00:04:17,424 --> 00:04:20,587
Wait till you see what's in the back seat.
77
00:04:20,660 --> 00:04:24,426
Eric, you're gonna have to move that old
rusty excuse for a car out of the driveway.
78
00:04:24,498 --> 00:04:27,331
Hey. Hey, hey, hey.
You're talking' about my Lucille here.
79
00:04:27,400 --> 00:04:29,300
Now, I mean,
granted, she's not the most reliable car,
80
00:04:29,369 --> 00:04:31,269
but she gets me where I gotta be going'.
81
00:04:31,338 --> 00:04:34,740
Hey, there's nothin' you guys can say or do
to pull me away from her.
82
00:04:34,808 --> 00:04:37,505
- Eric, why don't you take our car tonight?
- OK, sure.
83
00:04:37,577 --> 00:04:38,601
- Amy!
- No, Alan.
84
00:04:38,678 --> 00:04:41,147
I don't want him
driving that thing downtown.
85
00:04:41,214 --> 00:04:46,311
- Here are the keys. We'll take your car.
- OK, great. Here are the pliers.
86
00:04:46,386 --> 00:04:48,946
You want it to start, don't you?
87
00:04:52,259 --> 00:04:55,524
Man, I am so glad
we're spending New Year's Eve at home.
88
00:04:55,595 --> 00:04:59,589
Yup. No suits, no ties, no spending
200 bucks on a woman you hardly know.
89
00:04:59,666 --> 00:05:03,830
You don't know how close I came
to ringing in the New Year with Janine.
90
00:05:03,904 --> 00:05:05,872
- The clinger?
- Yeah.
91
00:05:05,939 --> 00:05:08,965
She's OK, you know,
if your mother's got plans.
92
00:05:09,042 --> 00:05:11,033
I'm telling you, man,
you should have stuck with Valerie.
93
00:05:11,111 --> 00:05:12,875
Oh, no, no.
Two weeks was enough for me.
94
00:05:12,946 --> 00:05:18,009
That girl had way too much baggage.
Our first date, she had to bring a skycap.
95
00:05:18,084 --> 00:05:20,951
- No, this was not my year for women.
- Or mine.
96
00:05:21,021 --> 00:05:23,513
Speaking of which,
I ran into Rochelle the other day.
97
00:05:23,590 --> 00:05:25,991
- Oh, yeah? How... how'd she look?
- Not so good.
98
00:05:26,059 --> 00:05:27,618
- Ah, thanks, man.
- I'm lying.
99
00:05:27,694 --> 00:05:31,096
I knew that.
Anyway, it's good to have the night off.
100
00:05:31,164 --> 00:05:32,495
- That's right. We got beer...
- Yes, sir.
101
00:05:32,566 --> 00:05:34,295
- (buzzer)
- Ah! Pizza.
102
00:05:34,367 --> 00:05:35,766
Yes.
103
00:05:37,704 --> 00:05:39,001
(giggles)
104
00:05:39,072 --> 00:05:43,168
- And Janine.
- Jonathan, first of all, relax. I'm not staying.
105
00:05:43,243 --> 00:05:45,007
- Come on in, Janine.
- But I saw your light on,
106
00:05:45,078 --> 00:05:46,603
and I know you hate to be alone, so...
107
00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:49,445
- No, that's you, Janine.
- Right.
108
00:05:49,516 --> 00:05:51,610
Anyway,
I wanted to make sure you were OK.
109
00:05:51,685 --> 00:05:53,346
- He's OK.
- Oh, hi, Eli.
110
00:05:53,420 --> 00:05:54,649
Happy New Year.
111
00:05:54,721 --> 00:05:57,418
- Jonathan, you look thin.
- Well, thanks.
112
00:05:57,490 --> 00:05:58,753
It's not a compliment.
113
00:05:58,825 --> 00:06:01,385
- You know what would be just terrific?
- What?
114
00:06:01,461 --> 00:06:04,658
How about if I whip you up a nice lasagna?
115
00:06:04,731 --> 00:06:08,065
- No, no, no. Look, I don't...
- Whoa, whoa, whoa. Lasagna, man.
116
00:06:08,134 --> 00:06:11,035
No, that's real nice, Janine, really. But
we got a pizza coming and everything, so...
117
00:06:11,104 --> 00:06:13,698
- (buzzer)
- See? See, there it is.
118
00:06:14,708 --> 00:06:17,973
Somebody order a pizza
with everything on it?
119
00:06:18,044 --> 00:06:20,741
- Valerie.
- A very happy New Year.
120
00:06:21,848 --> 00:06:23,338
Somewhere.
121
00:06:23,416 --> 00:06:25,407
Val?
122
00:06:25,485 --> 00:06:26,816
Janine?
123
00:06:26,887 --> 00:06:29,219
(both) Ch, my God!
124
00:06:34,661 --> 00:06:35,856
Nice going, Shawn.
125
00:06:35,929 --> 00:06:38,421
Without Uncle Laslo's hearse,
how are we gonna make it to the parties?
126
00:06:38,498 --> 00:06:40,193
Hey, hey. It's not my fault, OK?
127
00:06:40,267 --> 00:06:43,168
You see a corpse breathing,
you've gotta take it back.
128
00:06:43,236 --> 00:06:45,261
It's the right thing to do, man.
129
00:06:45,338 --> 00:06:50,037
Look, I'm happy for the stiff, all right?
But it really stuck it to a lot of people.
130
00:06:50,110 --> 00:06:51,669
Gee, guys, it's New Year's Eve.
131
00:06:51,745 --> 00:06:55,682
- A time to celebrate, not fight.
- You know what? You're right, Topanga.
132
00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:59,344
OK. And we're gonna make this
the best New Year's Eve ever.
133
00:06:59,419 --> 00:07:02,787
If we were dead,
'cause then we'd have a ride.
134
00:07:03,657 --> 00:07:06,354
Oh, Rebecca-Alexa,
I am so sorry the car broke down.
135
00:07:06,426 --> 00:07:09,293
Eric, don't worry about it.
These things happen.
136
00:07:09,362 --> 00:07:12,992
You understand?
You're not mean and icy? Oh!
137
00:07:13,066 --> 00:07:15,728
You are a super-duper model.
138
00:07:17,304 --> 00:07:20,638
Oh, my God.
Do... do you know who you are?
139
00:07:21,741 --> 00:07:23,835
You're Rebecca-Alexa.
140
00:07:23,910 --> 00:07:26,140
I'm a big, big, big fan.
141
00:07:26,212 --> 00:07:28,647
I-I'm huge.
142
00:07:28,715 --> 00:07:30,979
- Thank you.
- Hi. Hi.
143
00:07:31,051 --> 00:07:33,543
I-I'm Cory. I'm Eric's brother.
144
00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:35,748
Um, this is... Topanga.
145
00:07:35,822 --> 00:07:38,883
- She's a girl from school, but...
- Cory?
146
00:07:38,959 --> 00:07:44,125
She's also my girlfriend, and I love her
very much, so, uh, don't get any ideas.
147
00:07:44,197 --> 00:07:46,928
So... so, do supermodels
have any special powers?
148
00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:50,800
I mean, like,
can you read what I'm thinking?
149
00:07:50,870 --> 00:07:52,201
Yes.
150
00:07:53,340 --> 00:07:56,037
I'm really sorry.
151
00:07:56,476 --> 00:07:59,912
Rebecca-Alexa, I lucked out.
I got us the last cab in Philly.
152
00:07:59,980 --> 00:08:03,143
- Oh, Eric, you gotta let us share it.
- All right, let me think.
153
00:08:03,216 --> 00:08:05,810
I'm seeing a big, hairy "no."
154
00:08:05,885 --> 00:08:08,320
Eric, this is my first New Year's Eve
out of the house, all right?
155
00:08:08,388 --> 00:08:13,087
- I mean, without this cab, we're stranded.
- All right, hold on, hold on.
156
00:08:13,159 --> 00:08:16,026
No, I tried. I just can't care less.
157
00:08:17,397 --> 00:08:22,494
Cory, I know how you feel.
My older sister never took me anywhere.
158
00:08:22,569 --> 00:08:24,663
- I never forgave her.
- Cor, great idea.
159
00:08:24,738 --> 00:08:27,639
Why don't you share our cab, bud?
160
00:08:27,707 --> 00:08:30,005
Why, thanks, Eric.
What made you change your mind?
161
00:08:30,076 --> 00:08:33,842
Why don't you come over here,
and I'll tell you?
162
00:08:35,115 --> 00:08:37,015
You say one sentence to me or my date,
it'd better be,
163
00:08:37,083 --> 00:08:39,245
"Help, I'm fl yin' out the cab window."
164
00:08:39,319 --> 00:08:42,653
Oh, Eric, don't you worry about that.
I am not gonna do anything stupid.
165
00:08:42,722 --> 00:08:45,157
Cory, how could you
do something so stupid?
166
00:08:45,225 --> 00:08:46,750
You sent away the last cab in the city.
167
00:08:46,826 --> 00:08:49,454
Look, I'm telling you. There was
something weird about that driver.
168
00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:53,432
I mean, didn't you see his license in
the windshield? It wasn't even his picture.
169
00:08:53,500 --> 00:08:56,561
Cory, if stupidity was in the Olympics,
you'd win a Nobel prize.
170
00:08:56,636 --> 00:08:59,765
Look, Eric,
the man was obviously an impostor, OK?
171
00:08:59,839 --> 00:09:02,433
I mean, for all I know,
he was gonna take us to some warehouse
172
00:09:02,509 --> 00:09:04,568
and cut out our livers.
173
00:09:04,644 --> 00:09:07,909
Hey, no biggie. I've already had mine out.
174
00:09:07,981 --> 00:09:12,885
Rebecca-Alexa, I apologize for all
the stupidity that runs in this family.
175
00:09:12,952 --> 00:09:16,081
- I'm just a carrier.
- It's no big deal.
176
00:09:16,156 --> 00:09:20,457
I don't need to go to a big, crowded party
with everyone staring at us.
177
00:09:20,527 --> 00:09:23,394
- Oh, we're going', baby.
- Hey!
178
00:09:23,463 --> 00:09:26,489
Light bulb. Why don't we just have
our own little party right here?
179
00:09:26,566 --> 00:09:29,228
I'm telling you, it'll be so much fun
making popcorn, watching the ball drop...
180
00:09:29,302 --> 00:09:32,033
All right, all right. Cory, make it stop.
181
00:09:32,105 --> 00:09:35,837
Look, Rebecca-Alexa, one way or another,
we are gonna be seen at that party.
182
00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:39,607
How? I mean, what are we gonna do?
Take the subway?
183
00:09:40,313 --> 00:09:43,943
- Great idea, Rebecca.
- I wasn't being serious.
184
00:09:44,017 --> 00:09:45,712
Well, then, you lucked out,
'cause this is fun.
185
00:09:45,785 --> 00:09:49,119
I mean... riding' the rails
in a mighty locomotive.
186
00:09:49,189 --> 00:09:52,887
♪ I think I can,
I think I can, I think I can
187
00:09:52,959 --> 00:09:54,484
It's nice to see you
in a better mood, brother.
188
00:09:54,561 --> 00:09:56,962
- Just die.
- Isn't this great?
189
00:09:57,030 --> 00:10:00,967
There is something so exciting about
doing things by the seat of your pants.
190
00:10:01,034 --> 00:10:03,093
Yeah, like that guy.
191
00:10:03,169 --> 00:10:04,159
(all) Ohh!
192
00:10:04,237 --> 00:10:06,399
Gosh!
193
00:10:07,140 --> 00:10:09,131
Hey, Cory, why do I feel
like we're being watched?
194
00:10:09,209 --> 00:10:12,372
- You feel that too?
- Yeah, it's weird.
195
00:10:12,445 --> 00:10:15,176
You know, it... it feels kinda like...
196
00:10:15,248 --> 00:10:17,512
(both scream)
197
00:10:23,523 --> 00:10:27,118
OK. Come on. Let's do it, people.
We've got parties to go to.
198
00:10:27,193 --> 00:10:30,629
What's your rush, Shawn? It's only 10:30.
We have plenty of time before midnight.
199
00:10:30,697 --> 00:10:35,259
Yeah. And, Eric, you'll be kissing Rebecca
in front of all of Philly, just like you wanted.
200
00:10:35,335 --> 00:10:37,599
In front of all of Philly?
201
00:10:37,670 --> 00:10:39,832
You know, I don't know
where he gets this kinda stuff.
202
00:10:39,906 --> 00:10:43,536
So your brother thinks of me
as just a trophy?
203
00:10:44,811 --> 00:10:46,006
(mouths)
204
00:10:46,079 --> 00:10:48,047
- Yes!
- Cory!
205
00:10:48,114 --> 00:10:50,208
How do you lie to a supermodel?
206
00:10:50,283 --> 00:10:53,309
I mean, those lips
can see right through you.
207
00:10:53,386 --> 00:10:55,650
Eric? I just remembered.
208
00:10:55,722 --> 00:10:57,918
I have to... go home.
209
00:10:57,991 --> 00:11:00,824
What? No, wait! Rebecca-Alexa!
No! Rebecca-Alexal
210
00:11:00,894 --> 00:11:03,989
No, wait! Stop the train! Stop the train!
211
00:11:04,063 --> 00:11:06,498
Rebecca-Alexal My God!
212
00:11:07,934 --> 00:11:09,368
Eric! It's OK.
213
00:11:09,435 --> 00:11:11,733
I have to get off the train.
I have to get off the train!
214
00:11:11,804 --> 00:11:14,102
No. Look, you can get off
at the next stop, all right?
215
00:11:14,174 --> 00:11:16,836
There aren't any cabs left in the city.
She can't get too far.
216
00:11:16,910 --> 00:11:19,675
Trust me, OK?
Everything is gonna be dandy.
217
00:11:19,746 --> 00:11:22,408
- (brakes screech)
- (screaming)
218
00:11:23,750 --> 00:11:26,117
What did you do?
219
00:11:26,186 --> 00:11:28,883
- Nothing.
- (PA) Ladies and gentlemen, this is your...
220
00:11:28,955 --> 00:11:30,445
(static)
221
00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:32,150
We seem to be experiencing a major...
222
00:11:32,225 --> 00:11:33,192
(static)
223
00:11:33,259 --> 00:11:36,991
- What did he say?
- He said Cory broke the train.
224
00:11:41,801 --> 00:11:44,532
Trapped on a subway.
This is a nightmare!
225
00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:49,873
Look, no one's gonna bother us
if we just act tough, OK?
226
00:11:51,911 --> 00:11:54,380
Boy, I love New Year's Eve.
227
00:11:54,447 --> 00:11:58,179
I'd sure hate to have
to kill somebody, though.
228
00:12:00,320 --> 00:12:02,482
With my flu virus.
229
00:12:03,923 --> 00:12:06,722
OK, if I could just
pry my fingers into the door...
230
00:12:06,793 --> 00:12:09,160
...they would get stuck, like this.
231
00:12:09,229 --> 00:12:11,095
Ohh! Agh!
232
00:12:11,164 --> 00:12:15,328
Attention, passengers. The... (static)
...is still not functioning.
233
00:12:15,401 --> 00:12:17,631
Do not, under any circumstances... (static)
234
00:12:17,704 --> 00:12:20,503
...which may result
in death or dismemberment.
235
00:12:20,573 --> 00:12:21,734
Now what did he say?
236
00:12:21,808 --> 00:12:24,573
He said,
"Cory, go out and lick the third rail "
237
00:12:24,644 --> 00:12:28,706
Hey! Buck up, buckers. It's probably
just a teeny electrical problem.
238
00:12:28,781 --> 00:12:31,807
And look on the bright side.
The city is saving on electricity.
239
00:12:31,884 --> 00:12:36,117
What is it with you tonight, Topanga?
Did you swallow Sandy Duncan?
240
00:12:36,189 --> 00:12:38,954
That's it, Cory Matthews.
I am sick of being the rah-rah girl!
241
00:12:39,025 --> 00:12:42,290
You try being the positive one all the time,
and using words like "buckers."
242
00:12:42,362 --> 00:12:45,354
I have demons, so there!
243
00:12:45,431 --> 00:12:47,991
Wow. What a rush.
244
00:12:48,067 --> 00:12:51,662
You, uh... you guys don't spend
a lot of time on the subway, do you?
245
00:12:51,738 --> 00:12:53,968
Not on subways this nice.
246
00:12:54,974 --> 00:13:00,140
- So, uh, what do you think the problem is?
- A loose wire, an air blow in the Cineston.
247
00:13:00,213 --> 00:13:01,544
Duh.
248
00:13:01,614 --> 00:13:05,642
- How long till they fix it?
- On a holiday? I's hard to say, man.
249
00:13:09,022 --> 00:13:13,619
Hello? Hello? Eric Matthews to bridge,
Eric Matthews to bridge.
250
00:13:13,693 --> 00:13:16,924
OK, guys. I have been up and down
this train, and here's the scoop.
251
00:13:16,996 --> 00:13:20,591
Car five, parochial schoolgirls
who ditched their nun.
252
00:13:20,667 --> 00:13:22,761
(chuckling) Nice!
253
00:13:22,835 --> 00:13:24,200
For Shawn.
254
00:13:24,270 --> 00:13:28,798
Oh, and car two, Mrs. Ginelli
just went into labor. I saw the head.
255
00:13:28,875 --> 00:13:31,207
- Hey, what are you eating there?
- Oh, that's the best part.
256
00:13:31,277 --> 00:13:35,942
Some caterers are stuck in the next car.
Look. Look, it's a tiny, tiny crab cake.
257
00:13:36,015 --> 00:13:39,212
- In a light pastry shell.
- Will you forget about the crab cake?
258
00:13:39,285 --> 00:13:41,845
The subway. The subway, can they fix it?
What's wrong with it?
259
00:13:41,921 --> 00:13:45,323
Why would I ask?
We've got food, babes and birth.
260
00:13:45,391 --> 00:13:48,292
Eric, the cycle of life is complete.
261
00:13:49,028 --> 00:13:51,429
Not without Rebecca-Alexa.
262
00:13:52,365 --> 00:13:55,926
Hello? Hello, if there's any intelligent life
out there that can hear my voice...
263
00:13:56,002 --> 00:13:58,903
(man) Get off the box, kid.
This line is for emergencies only.
264
00:13:58,971 --> 00:14:00,962
Look, sir, believe me,
I have an emergency.
265
00:14:01,040 --> 00:14:04,738
I am right now missing my date
with supermodel Rebecca-Alexa.
266
00:14:04,811 --> 00:14:07,337
- The jeans girl?
- Yes, my captain.
267
00:14:07,413 --> 00:14:10,178
Life's tough.
Hey, Ernie, is that a crab cake?
268
00:14:10,249 --> 00:14:12,718
Oh, no!
269
00:14:16,889 --> 00:14:18,880
(raucous laughter)
270
00:14:19,826 --> 00:14:24,093
- I didn't know you went out with Jonathan.
- Oh, man. Eli, I'm getting killed over there.
271
00:14:24,163 --> 00:14:26,564
I know. Shh.
272
00:14:26,632 --> 00:14:28,964
- How'd he end it with you?
- He took me to dinner.
273
00:14:29,035 --> 00:14:30,935
- Italian?
- Yeah.
274
00:14:31,003 --> 00:14:33,301
And then he tells me, "Look."
275
00:14:33,373 --> 00:14:36,604
"You deserve to be with someone
who can really appreciate you."
276
00:14:36,676 --> 00:14:41,546
- "I'm just not ready..."
- (both) "...for such a big commitment."
277
00:14:41,614 --> 00:14:43,981
Well, if I'm so horrible,
what are you guys both doing here?
278
00:14:44,050 --> 00:14:48,419
Hey, hey. Don't bring 'em down, man.
They're having a good time.
279
00:14:48,488 --> 00:14:50,286
- Uh, Eli?
- Yeah?
280
00:14:50,356 --> 00:14:53,587
You wanna give me a hand
with these plates?
281
00:14:53,659 --> 00:14:55,559
Well, you know,
I would, Jonathan, but, uh...
282
00:14:55,628 --> 00:14:59,360
...I don't think I'm ready
for such a big commitment.
283
00:14:59,432 --> 00:15:01,764
Oh, that's a burly look.
284
00:15:03,770 --> 00:15:05,704
What are you doing'? You're supposed to be
helping' me get rid of them.
285
00:15:05,772 --> 00:15:08,707
Look, they're not going' anywhere.
We may as well just sit back and enjoy it.
286
00:15:08,775 --> 00:15:14,043
You do that. Meanwhile, I'll light myself
on fire and I'll do a happy dance.
287
00:15:14,113 --> 00:15:16,081
There's something so nice
about being around women.
288
00:15:16,149 --> 00:15:17,617
Yeah, but the reason
we planned this whole night
289
00:15:17,683 --> 00:15:20,311
is that we wouldn't
have to be around women.
290
00:15:20,386 --> 00:15:22,286
I lied.
291
00:15:22,355 --> 00:15:24,255
So, Timmy, you tiger, here's the plan:
292
00:15:24,323 --> 00:15:27,315
I'm gonna lower you down. When your feet
hit the tracks, I want you to start running.
293
00:15:27,393 --> 00:15:30,556
You're gonna find this girl,
and give her this note. OK?
294
00:15:30,630 --> 00:15:33,099
Take the note, Timmy.
Now run like the wind, Timmy.
295
00:15:33,166 --> 00:15:36,693
Run like the wind, Timmy. Timmy...
296
00:15:37,937 --> 00:15:41,168
Hey, lady!
You just take care of you, all right?
297
00:15:41,240 --> 00:15:43,538
OK! Mrs. Ginelli's real close.
298
00:15:43,609 --> 00:15:47,068
Does anybody here
know anything about deliveries?
299
00:15:47,146 --> 00:15:50,377
You. Pizza guy.
You'll have to do. Come on!
300
00:15:53,219 --> 00:15:56,814
Eric looks very upset.
You should talk to him.
301
00:15:57,824 --> 00:16:00,156
Yeah, I guess you're right.
302
00:16:02,128 --> 00:16:03,721
Eric, I'm, you know...
303
00:16:03,796 --> 00:16:05,127
You!
304
00:16:06,332 --> 00:16:10,235
You're the reason for all of this. You
climbed out of my cab and sent it away.
305
00:16:10,303 --> 00:16:13,000
You told Rebecca-Alexa I wanted to kiss
her in front of all of Philadelphia,
306
00:16:13,072 --> 00:16:15,097
thus foiling my divine plan!
307
00:16:15,174 --> 00:16:19,338
I'm sorry your night with Rebecca-Alexa
didn't work out, OK?
308
00:16:19,412 --> 00:16:23,042
All I wanted was a big party,
with a lot of people having a good time.
309
00:16:23,115 --> 00:16:25,812
You think this is
how I wanted to spend my night?
310
00:16:25,885 --> 00:16:30,118
I mean, you'd have to be an idiot
to have a good time down here.
311
00:16:30,189 --> 00:16:33,887
I don't know about you guys,
but I am having a great time.
312
00:16:33,960 --> 00:16:37,954
Oh, and that pizza guy says he'll have
the baby delivered in under 30 minutes.
313
00:16:38,030 --> 00:16:41,159
Which gives me plenty of time
to check up on those parochial girls.
314
00:16:41,234 --> 00:16:43,828
I told them my uncle was the Pope.
315
00:16:46,539 --> 00:16:49,941
Well, I guess some people
can have a good time anywhere.
316
00:16:50,009 --> 00:16:53,912
So, Eric, if you just want to sulk and
feel sorry for yourself, be my guest, OK?
317
00:16:53,980 --> 00:16:55,345
But I'm gonna make the best of it,
318
00:16:55,414 --> 00:16:57,610
'cause I'm here with my friends,
and that's what's important.
319
00:16:57,683 --> 00:17:00,175
Yep, fine. You do that, all right?
320
00:17:00,253 --> 00:17:02,950
I'm gonna use all my brainpower
to will this train to move.
321
00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:05,013
(breathes deeply)
322
00:17:06,959 --> 00:17:09,189
Ah, phooey! I need a bigger brain.
323
00:17:09,262 --> 00:17:11,697
Timmy! Come over here.
324
00:17:13,900 --> 00:17:17,700
I don't get John either,
'cause I loved Thelma and Louise, OK?
325
00:17:17,770 --> 00:17:19,101
Could he be more perfect?
326
00:17:19,171 --> 00:17:20,935
- Stop. Stop.
- I know, I know.
327
00:17:21,007 --> 00:17:22,406
I mean, really.
328
00:17:22,475 --> 00:17:26,639
- Hey, Johnny. Where you going', man?
- Oh, I don't know. I'm thinking' the roof.
329
00:17:26,712 --> 00:17:28,908
Well, remember, tuck and roll.
330
00:17:31,784 --> 00:17:33,309
Hey, Eli.
331
00:17:33,386 --> 00:17:37,016
I made a New Year's resolution:
I hate your guts.
332
00:17:37,089 --> 00:17:39,956
The man is obviously not a people person.
333
00:17:43,062 --> 00:17:44,257
Lynn.
334
00:17:44,330 --> 00:17:49,769
Jonathan, I, um... I just need
some closure on our relationship.
335
00:17:50,269 --> 00:17:52,738
Relationship? We only went out once.
336
00:17:52,805 --> 00:17:55,672
Why are you being so hostile? (wails)
337
00:17:55,741 --> 00:18:01,009
I just need to be with someone
who will listen to me!
338
00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:02,741
-Hey, El
-Yeah?
339
00:18:02,815 --> 00:18:05,648
(whispers) Come in, come in. Incoming!
340
00:18:11,724 --> 00:18:16,560
OK! All aboard the party car. We've got
refreshments by the conductor's booth,
341
00:18:16,629 --> 00:18:19,462
we've got dancing right here,
and if you guys want a quite place to chat,
342
00:18:19,532 --> 00:18:22,991
there is plenty of room
down by the sad guy.
343
00:18:25,271 --> 00:18:27,706
Hey, man, you know, I thought tonight
was gonna be a wash.
344
00:18:27,773 --> 00:18:31,971
But you pulled it together
and turned it into a party.
345
00:18:32,044 --> 00:18:34,536
- What?
- A party.
346
00:18:34,614 --> 00:18:37,083
- Oh, cool. Thanks.
- Hey, you're all right.
347
00:18:37,149 --> 00:18:39,208
Hey, everybody! Listen up.
How about we give it up
348
00:18:39,285 --> 00:18:43,483
for the man who put together
this little underground party?
349
00:18:43,556 --> 00:18:45,388
(all) What?
350
00:18:45,458 --> 00:18:47,392
- Party.
- Oh.
351
00:18:47,460 --> 00:18:49,758
- Yeah!
- (cheering)
352
00:18:49,829 --> 00:18:51,820
(4 dance music)
353
00:19:03,409 --> 00:19:05,207
What was that for?
It's not even midnight.
354
00:19:05,277 --> 00:19:10,113
I know. But they're passing out garlic balls,
and I wanted to get a fresh kiss in.
355
00:19:10,182 --> 00:19:12,776
Can I get one of those?
356
00:19:12,852 --> 00:19:16,083
- A lot of garlic.
- Yeah, like I got somebody to kiss.
357
00:19:16,155 --> 00:19:18,920
- Look, Eric, I said I was sorry.
- No, no. Look, I'm over Rebecca-Alexa.
358
00:19:18,991 --> 00:19:21,926
You know why? 'Cause I dumped her.
I can do better than her.
359
00:19:21,994 --> 00:19:26,022
You know what else?
I don't even believe me. Thank you.
360
00:19:28,501 --> 00:19:29,400
Uh...
361
00:19:29,468 --> 00:19:32,267
You know, Eric, I was thinking.
362
00:19:32,338 --> 00:19:36,070
I mean... everyone always makes
such a big deal out of New Year's, right?
363
00:19:36,142 --> 00:19:39,168
But why? I mean, they never turn out
the way you planned.
364
00:19:39,245 --> 00:19:42,306
- Yeah, you're not kidding'.
- Yeah, especially for us.
365
00:19:42,381 --> 00:19:47,911
Uh, you remember that night where
we tried to make popcorn in the radiator?
366
00:19:47,987 --> 00:19:50,422
How could I forget?
I mean, Mom and Dad freaked out on us,
367
00:19:50,489 --> 00:19:53,424
and the walls popped for weeks.
368
00:19:53,492 --> 00:19:56,359
How about that year we let
the blonde baby-sitter curl your hair?
369
00:19:56,429 --> 00:19:58,454
Oh, yeah. I remember that.
370
00:19:58,531 --> 00:20:01,762
- When's that going away?
- I don't know. It's...
371
00:20:03,269 --> 00:20:05,966
Yeah, we had
a lot of lousy New Year's together.
372
00:20:06,038 --> 00:20:08,530
Yeah, we sure did.
373
00:20:08,607 --> 00:20:10,939
They were all pretty good.
374
00:20:11,010 --> 00:20:16,642
Especially this one. I mean, big party,
lot of people dancing, having a good time.
375
00:20:18,551 --> 00:20:20,542
Thanks, man.
376
00:20:23,456 --> 00:20:27,393
OK, everybody! Listen up, listen up!
The New Year is coming in!
377
00:20:27,460 --> 00:20:29,519
Five... four...
378
00:20:29,595 --> 00:20:32,360
(all join in) ...three, two, one!
379
00:20:32,431 --> 00:20:33,990
(cheering)
380
00:20:34,066 --> 00:20:36,160
(whooping)
381
00:20:36,235 --> 00:20:38,932
Hey! Hey, hey!
Hey, good news, everybody!
382
00:20:39,004 --> 00:20:41,302
- Twins!
- Mrs. Ginelli had twins?
383
00:20:41,373 --> 00:20:43,569
No. But I do.
384
00:20:43,642 --> 00:20:47,306
This is Linda,
and her sister, More-Linda.
385
00:20:49,515 --> 00:20:50,949
Happy New Year's, Cor.
386
00:20:52,184 --> 00:20:54,175
Happy New Year's, Eric.
387
00:20:56,088 --> 00:20:58,557
Eric, as much as I'm liking
this brother-brother moment, I...
388
00:20:58,624 --> 00:21:02,117
- Yeah, go kiss your girlfriend. Go.
- Thank you.
389
00:21:04,497 --> 00:21:06,488
- Hello.
- Hello.
390
00:21:08,033 --> 00:21:10,092
Quiche?
391
00:21:10,169 --> 00:21:12,501
Don't mind if I do.
392
00:21:23,048 --> 00:21:28,009
Amy, Alan... Oh, this is so embarrassing.
Do you have any money?
393
00:21:28,087 --> 00:21:32,081
Well, George Hamilton Feeny! Great tan!
394
00:21:32,158 --> 00:21:34,684
Yes, yes. Well, it was a wonderful trip.
But the cab is waiting,
395
00:21:34,760 --> 00:21:38,594
and all I have is Bahamian cash,
and airline peanuts.
396
00:21:38,664 --> 00:21:41,190
Oh, I'm sorry, George.
I didn't get to the bank today.
397
00:21:41,267 --> 00:21:43,599
Hey! I got a dollar.
398
00:21:43,669 --> 00:21:45,797
Dig deeper, man. The meter's running.
399
00:21:45,871 --> 00:21:48,340
Well, why don't you have the guy
take you to a bank machine?
400
00:21:48,407 --> 00:21:51,001
I don't want to spend
another minute with this driver.
401
00:21:51,076 --> 00:21:53,977
He looks nothing like his picture.
402
00:21:54,046 --> 00:21:55,571
(car horn)
403
00:21:55,648 --> 00:21:58,208
I'll be right there, Vajneesh!
404
00:21:59,885 --> 00:22:01,683
Hey, Mr. Feeny.
How was your trip?
405
00:22:01,754 --> 00:22:04,223
Hey, maybe the boys
can loan you some money.
406
00:22:04,290 --> 00:22:06,019
Oh...
407
00:22:06,091 --> 00:22:08,458
A little short again...
408
00:22:08,527 --> 00:22:10,052
...George?
409
00:22:12,898 --> 00:22:15,299
I'd rather risk my liver.
34333
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