All language subtitles for Cheers.S07E22.1080p.Amazon.WEB-DL.DD+.2.0.H.264-TrollHD_track3_[eng]

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt-PT Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,703 --> 00:00:04,372 Cheers is filmed before A live studio audience. 2 00:00:06,274 --> 00:00:07,875 Good evening, Mr. Clavin. 3 00:00:07,875 --> 00:00:09,477 How lovely To see you again. 4 00:00:09,477 --> 00:00:12,313 It's a trick, isn't it? You're going to hurt me. 5 00:00:12,313 --> 00:00:13,714 Yeah, what's The story here, Carla? 6 00:00:13,714 --> 00:00:16,050 You've been Acting very strange All evening. 7 00:00:16,050 --> 00:00:17,518 Why? What did I do? 8 00:00:17,518 --> 00:00:19,353 Well, for example, You've poured me 3 beers 9 00:00:19,353 --> 00:00:22,490 Without once flicking The foam on my nose. 10 00:00:22,490 --> 00:00:25,993 You haven't even Spit on anybody. 11 00:00:25,993 --> 00:00:27,061 What is it, honey? 12 00:00:27,061 --> 00:00:29,063 Trouble at home? 13 00:00:29,063 --> 00:00:31,031 All right. I'm going To tell you guys. 14 00:00:31,031 --> 00:00:33,334 I went to see madame lazoro This morning. 15 00:00:33,334 --> 00:00:34,968 Your fortune teller? 16 00:00:34,968 --> 00:00:37,138 Palmist. 17 00:00:37,138 --> 00:00:38,239 Anyway, she told me 18 00:00:38,239 --> 00:00:40,474 That my courtesy To others tonight 19 00:00:40,474 --> 00:00:43,511 Could result In substantial wealth. 20 00:00:43,511 --> 00:00:46,680 And, I'm telling you, Tonight I'm taking No chances. 21 00:00:46,680 --> 00:00:48,516 What, you're not Even going to insult Anybody? 22 00:00:48,516 --> 00:00:50,651 Well, not unless I can do it so subtly 23 00:00:50,651 --> 00:00:53,087 That he doesn't know He's been insulted. 24 00:00:53,087 --> 00:00:56,190 No, tonight the bigger Jackass the guy is, 25 00:00:56,190 --> 00:00:59,059 The more courteous I am going to be. 26 00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:02,163 I'll start With numero uno. 27 00:01:02,163 --> 00:01:03,831 Now, I do hope You'll allow me 28 00:01:03,831 --> 00:01:05,666 The incredible privilege 29 00:01:05,666 --> 00:01:08,136 Of serving you a beer, Mr. Clavin. 30 00:01:16,144 --> 00:01:18,246 * sometimes You want to go * 31 00:01:18,246 --> 00:01:21,582 * where everybody Knows your name * 32 00:01:23,651 --> 00:01:26,820 * and they're always Glad you came * 33 00:01:28,256 --> 00:01:30,758 * you want to be Where you can see * 34 00:01:30,758 --> 00:01:33,361 * our troubles Are all the same * 35 00:01:33,361 --> 00:01:34,562 * you want to go * 36 00:01:34,562 --> 00:01:37,665 * where everybody Knows your name * 37 00:01:52,646 --> 00:01:54,582 You're in early Tonight, frasier. 38 00:01:54,582 --> 00:01:57,351 Yes. I'm meeting A former colleague, Dr. Lawrence crandell, 39 00:01:57,351 --> 00:01:58,452 For a refiner drink. 40 00:01:58,452 --> 00:02:00,087 He's in town On a book tour. 41 00:02:00,087 --> 00:02:01,322 Oh, yeah? He's a writer, huh? 42 00:02:01,322 --> 00:02:02,490 Ooh, I should say so. 43 00:02:02,490 --> 00:02:04,124 He's written A raging bestseller. 44 00:02:04,124 --> 00:02:05,193 You know, If I weren't so 45 00:02:05,193 --> 00:02:06,527 Thoroughly happy In my own life, 46 00:02:06,527 --> 00:02:08,862 I might even stoop To being Just a bit envious 47 00:02:08,862 --> 00:02:09,963 Of A former colleague 48 00:02:09,963 --> 00:02:11,765 Who's now so Wildly successful. 49 00:02:11,765 --> 00:02:13,401 Well, that is if You measure success 50 00:02:13,401 --> 00:02:17,738 By dollars and cents And popularity, Personal fame. 51 00:02:17,738 --> 00:02:18,839 I'm happy for him. 52 00:02:18,839 --> 00:02:19,840 What's the book about? 53 00:02:19,840 --> 00:02:22,376 Who gives a damn? 54 00:02:22,376 --> 00:02:24,745 Sorry. It's A marriage manual. 55 00:02:24,745 --> 00:02:27,781 It's entitled The forever couple-- 56 00:02:27,781 --> 00:02:29,450 The joy of loving One person 57 00:02:29,450 --> 00:02:30,751 For the rest Of your life. 58 00:02:30,751 --> 00:02:34,555 Ah, science fiction. Those usually sell great. 59 00:02:34,555 --> 00:02:36,357 But, you know, success Does have its price tag. 60 00:02:36,357 --> 00:02:39,893 He's been away From his wife valerie for The better part of a year. 61 00:02:39,893 --> 00:02:41,195 Jeez, I think I'd go crazy 62 00:02:41,195 --> 00:02:42,663 If I was away From lilith for that long. 63 00:02:42,663 --> 00:02:44,131 I don't even like To think about it. 64 00:02:44,131 --> 00:02:45,132 I'll bet. 65 00:02:45,132 --> 00:02:47,868 Well, I do Think about it. 66 00:02:47,868 --> 00:02:49,703 I don't enjoy it. 67 00:02:49,703 --> 00:02:50,471 Sure not. 68 00:02:50,471 --> 00:02:52,706 Well, I do Enjoy it. 69 00:02:52,706 --> 00:02:53,941 I'm not proud Of the fact. 70 00:02:57,978 --> 00:02:59,012 Frasier. 71 00:02:59,012 --> 00:03:00,314 Larry, good To see you again. 72 00:03:00,314 --> 00:03:01,415 Good to see you. 73 00:03:01,415 --> 00:03:02,483 Have I told you How thrilled I am 74 00:03:02,483 --> 00:03:03,651 About the success Of your book? 75 00:03:03,651 --> 00:03:04,418 Yes, you have. 76 00:03:04,418 --> 00:03:05,453 It's a fabulous book. 77 00:03:05,453 --> 00:03:06,587 You know, I was Just thinking 78 00:03:06,587 --> 00:03:07,755 What a wonderful gift It would make. 79 00:03:07,755 --> 00:03:08,989 Have you read it? 80 00:03:08,989 --> 00:03:12,826 Well, no. I was Hoping someone might Give it to me. 81 00:03:12,826 --> 00:03:13,761 Let me get you A drink. 82 00:03:13,761 --> 00:03:15,763 Well, thanks. Black And white, neat. 83 00:03:15,763 --> 00:03:18,899 Ah, lawrence, This is rebecca howe, 84 00:03:18,899 --> 00:03:20,100 This is Lawrence crandell. 85 00:03:20,100 --> 00:03:21,235 Pleased To meet you. 86 00:03:21,235 --> 00:03:23,170 And this is Sam malone. 87 00:03:23,170 --> 00:03:25,005 Oh, not The sam malone. 88 00:03:25,005 --> 00:03:26,139 You're a hell Of a pitcher. 89 00:03:26,139 --> 00:03:29,009 I saw you strike out Reggie jackson. 90 00:03:29,009 --> 00:03:30,778 Made him look Like a fool. 91 00:03:30,778 --> 00:03:32,913 Hardly blame him For knocking you Off the mound 92 00:03:32,913 --> 00:03:36,284 The next time up With that Line drive. 93 00:03:36,284 --> 00:03:37,918 So, uh, frasier Told me 94 00:03:37,918 --> 00:03:40,254 That you've been Baching it a long time. 95 00:03:40,254 --> 00:03:41,722 Must be pretty rough, huh? 96 00:03:41,722 --> 00:03:43,324 Say, why didn't you Just bring valerie With you? 97 00:03:43,324 --> 00:03:45,593 Well, you know, She hates to travel. 98 00:03:45,593 --> 00:03:47,961 Besides, We decided this was A perfect opportunity 99 00:03:47,961 --> 00:03:51,064 To test my theories About marital fidelity. 100 00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:54,402 And I'm glad to say After 10 months Of celibacy, 101 00:03:54,402 --> 00:03:58,071 I can now pronounce My principles sound. 102 00:03:58,071 --> 00:03:59,340 After 10 months Of celibacy, 103 00:03:59,340 --> 00:04:01,309 I couldn't even Pronounce my name. 104 00:04:04,778 --> 00:04:07,681 I make it a point To tell my wife At least once a day, 105 00:04:07,681 --> 00:04:10,050 "You're my world, You're my life. 106 00:04:10,050 --> 00:04:11,452 I love you." 107 00:04:11,452 --> 00:04:13,954 I bet my wife would love To hear those words. 108 00:04:13,954 --> 00:04:15,255 Could you Give her a call? 109 00:04:19,293 --> 00:04:20,828 So, the book's Doing pretty good, huh? 110 00:04:20,828 --> 00:04:22,496 Yes, it has been Received rather well. 111 00:04:22,496 --> 00:04:25,265 In fact, This last review is So embarrassingly good, 112 00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:28,268 I should just wad it up And throw it away, 113 00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:30,704 But I need several Hundred copies first. 114 00:04:30,704 --> 00:04:32,473 Is there A photocopying machine Around here? 115 00:04:32,473 --> 00:04:35,809 Yeah, rebecca's Got one in her office. You don't mind, do you? 116 00:04:35,809 --> 00:04:36,977 No, help yourself. 117 00:04:36,977 --> 00:04:38,312 That's very kind of you. 118 00:04:38,312 --> 00:04:39,347 Any special Instructions? 119 00:04:39,347 --> 00:04:40,581 Yes. Just push The blue button. 120 00:04:40,581 --> 00:04:41,849 It's right under The sign that says, 121 00:04:41,849 --> 00:04:44,051 "This machine is For photocopying documents, 122 00:04:44,051 --> 00:04:44,985 Not your butt." 123 00:04:54,395 --> 00:04:55,363 All set? 124 00:04:55,363 --> 00:04:56,330 Thanks again. 125 00:04:56,330 --> 00:04:57,465 You're welcome. 126 00:05:00,401 --> 00:05:02,169 Miss howe, May I ask you something? 127 00:05:02,169 --> 00:05:03,471 Sure. 128 00:05:03,471 --> 00:05:04,972 I hope you won't take This the wrong way, 129 00:05:04,972 --> 00:05:09,477 But my field is Human sexual dynamics, 130 00:05:09,477 --> 00:05:12,446 And just now I had The strangest impression-- 131 00:05:12,446 --> 00:05:14,915 Please tell me If I'm wrong-- 132 00:05:14,915 --> 00:05:18,251 That something happened When you and I Were introduced. 133 00:05:18,251 --> 00:05:19,487 I sensed some spark, 134 00:05:19,487 --> 00:05:22,990 Some flicker Of response On your part. 135 00:05:22,990 --> 00:05:24,525 Very subtle, 136 00:05:24,525 --> 00:05:26,960 But unmistakable. 137 00:05:26,960 --> 00:05:29,296 Was I imagining that? 138 00:05:29,296 --> 00:05:30,531 I think so. 139 00:05:32,199 --> 00:05:34,668 Well, my mistake. 140 00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:36,003 I'm sure You understand. 141 00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:38,572 Of course. 142 00:05:38,572 --> 00:05:41,208 You--you are aware I wasn't being judgmental. 143 00:05:41,208 --> 00:05:42,576 Of course. 144 00:05:42,576 --> 00:05:44,978 It's the response itself That interested me, 145 00:05:44,978 --> 00:05:46,780 Purely as A scientist. 146 00:05:46,780 --> 00:05:49,817 And you are quite sure That on some very basic level 147 00:05:49,817 --> 00:05:54,087 You didn't experience An undeniable attraction? 148 00:05:54,087 --> 00:05:56,957 Positive. 149 00:05:56,957 --> 00:05:58,626 Well, I'm glad We cleared that up. 150 00:06:03,531 --> 00:06:05,098 Still, I can't keep Wondering... 151 00:06:07,067 --> 00:06:08,368 Whether your subconscious 152 00:06:08,368 --> 00:06:10,303 May not be trying To tell us something. 153 00:06:10,303 --> 00:06:11,371 I swear to you-- 154 00:06:11,371 --> 00:06:13,674 When I hear Such facile denial, 155 00:06:13,674 --> 00:06:16,143 It always sets off A little alarm in my head. 156 00:06:16,143 --> 00:06:17,177 Dr. Crandell... 157 00:06:17,177 --> 00:06:19,513 Call me lawrence. 158 00:06:19,513 --> 00:06:22,015 Let me make this As clear as I know how. 159 00:06:22,015 --> 00:06:25,953 There was no attraction When we met or since. 160 00:06:25,953 --> 00:06:27,455 I felt nothing. 161 00:06:27,455 --> 00:06:29,289 I feel nothing. 162 00:06:29,289 --> 00:06:31,959 Zero. Nada. Zip. 163 00:06:34,061 --> 00:06:35,463 Zip. 164 00:06:35,463 --> 00:06:37,731 Interesting unconscious Choice of words. 165 00:06:42,269 --> 00:06:43,804 Try this word-- 166 00:06:43,804 --> 00:06:45,072 Out! 167 00:06:45,072 --> 00:06:46,139 All right. Sorry. 168 00:06:48,275 --> 00:06:49,176 Man! 169 00:06:51,979 --> 00:06:53,046 [knock on door] 170 00:06:53,046 --> 00:06:54,314 I give up! 171 00:06:54,314 --> 00:06:55,883 You make me crazy With desire 172 00:06:55,883 --> 00:06:57,618 And I can't keep My hands off you! 173 00:06:57,618 --> 00:06:58,886 What do you want? 174 00:07:02,856 --> 00:07:05,859 Sign these invoices, And then, be gentle. 175 00:07:15,068 --> 00:07:19,006 Why don't you Sit over there, Walter? 176 00:07:19,006 --> 00:07:22,209 Do you suppose I might trouble you for Two brandies, miss howe? 177 00:07:22,209 --> 00:07:24,745 Ask the bartender. 178 00:07:24,745 --> 00:07:25,879 Of course We can help you. 179 00:07:25,879 --> 00:07:27,715 Woody, Pour dr. Crandell 180 00:07:27,715 --> 00:07:30,383 A couple Of our house brand. 181 00:07:30,383 --> 00:07:32,586 Two house brands On the house. 182 00:07:32,586 --> 00:07:35,088 That's very kind Of you, sam. 183 00:07:35,088 --> 00:07:38,559 One seldom gets to sample A good nigerian cognac. 184 00:07:41,562 --> 00:07:43,964 Weren't you Kind of rude To dr. Crandell? 185 00:07:43,964 --> 00:07:44,932 Was I? 186 00:07:44,932 --> 00:07:46,333 Sorry. 187 00:07:46,333 --> 00:07:47,901 Well, what did he Ever do to you? 188 00:07:47,901 --> 00:07:49,570 I don't know. Nothing. 189 00:07:49,570 --> 00:07:51,271 Never mind. 190 00:07:51,271 --> 00:07:53,106 Your hostility Was unmistakable. 191 00:07:56,076 --> 00:07:58,579 All right. 192 00:07:58,579 --> 00:08:01,515 The man came on to me In my office. 193 00:08:01,515 --> 00:08:04,184 Dr. Crandell Came on to you? 194 00:08:04,184 --> 00:08:05,619 What did he do? 195 00:08:05,619 --> 00:08:07,655 Did he touch you? 196 00:08:07,655 --> 00:08:09,356 No, he did not touch me. 197 00:08:09,356 --> 00:08:10,490 Make an indecent Proposal? 198 00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:11,458 Of course not. 199 00:08:11,458 --> 00:08:12,492 Comment on your looks? 200 00:08:12,492 --> 00:08:13,694 Ask you for a date? 201 00:08:13,694 --> 00:08:18,365 Whistle? Flash? What? 202 00:08:18,365 --> 00:08:21,301 He asked About my feelings. 203 00:08:21,301 --> 00:08:23,236 The man should Be horsewhipped. 204 00:08:26,173 --> 00:08:29,276 Of course he asked About your feelings. It's his field. 205 00:08:29,276 --> 00:08:30,778 The man is An analyst. 206 00:08:30,778 --> 00:08:33,981 He's written volumes On human sexual Attraction. 207 00:08:33,981 --> 00:08:35,749 So, uh, Then what happened? 208 00:08:35,749 --> 00:08:38,151 I'll tell you What happened, Mr. Smarty-pantses. 209 00:08:41,655 --> 00:08:44,558 He...Thanked me Politely 210 00:08:44,558 --> 00:08:46,760 And he left. 211 00:08:46,760 --> 00:08:48,829 Oh, that doesn't Seem so terrible, Does it? 212 00:08:48,829 --> 00:08:50,163 Rebecca, I assure you, 213 00:08:50,163 --> 00:08:52,532 You must have Misunderstood His intentions. 214 00:08:52,532 --> 00:08:54,001 He's in love With his wife. 215 00:08:54,001 --> 00:08:56,604 They're the most Happily-married Couple I know. 216 00:08:56,604 --> 00:08:58,839 Gee, I guess I could Have been wrong. 217 00:08:58,839 --> 00:09:02,009 What if he was just Being psychological Or something? 218 00:09:02,009 --> 00:09:04,077 I should apologize To him, huh? 219 00:09:04,077 --> 00:09:06,146 I guess you should. 220 00:09:06,146 --> 00:09:08,148 We'll be in touch. 221 00:09:08,148 --> 00:09:09,717 Dr. Crandell, 222 00:09:09,717 --> 00:09:11,251 May I speak with you A moment? 223 00:09:11,251 --> 00:09:12,452 What for? 224 00:09:12,452 --> 00:09:16,389 Oh, I want To apologize to you 225 00:09:16,389 --> 00:09:17,858 For having That conversation 226 00:09:17,858 --> 00:09:20,060 And me getting A little bit upset. 227 00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:21,729 I hope you don't Think me rude. 228 00:09:21,729 --> 00:09:23,030 Oh, of course not. 229 00:09:23,030 --> 00:09:24,832 You answered My questions Honestly 230 00:09:24,832 --> 00:09:27,434 In the spirit In which they Were asked, 231 00:09:27,434 --> 00:09:28,535 So that's An end to that. 232 00:09:28,535 --> 00:09:30,203 Oh, thank you. 233 00:09:30,203 --> 00:09:32,272 That's all right. You meet someone. 234 00:09:32,272 --> 00:09:34,207 You find him Unattractive, 235 00:09:34,207 --> 00:09:35,342 Even repulsive, 236 00:09:35,342 --> 00:09:36,243 It happens. 237 00:09:38,078 --> 00:09:40,147 Well, I don't think You're repulsive. 238 00:09:40,147 --> 00:09:43,550 No, no, please, don't Think you have to worry About my feelings. 239 00:09:43,550 --> 00:09:45,218 I think you're An attractive man. 240 00:09:45,218 --> 00:09:46,720 Really? That's Very flattering. 241 00:09:50,223 --> 00:09:51,024 As a matter of fact, 242 00:09:51,024 --> 00:09:52,125 I'm really Quite awkward 243 00:09:52,125 --> 00:09:54,161 And uncomfortable Around women. 244 00:09:54,161 --> 00:09:57,765 As a matter of fact, The very idea of my Propositioning you 245 00:09:57,765 --> 00:10:00,067 Or having An opening line... 246 00:10:00,067 --> 00:10:01,702 Doing something So blatant as-- 247 00:10:01,702 --> 00:10:03,270 Rubbing your foot Along my leg? 248 00:10:03,270 --> 00:10:04,672 Exactly. 249 00:10:04,672 --> 00:10:06,907 You're doing that Right now. 250 00:10:06,907 --> 00:10:09,609 Oh, goodness. Was that you? 251 00:10:09,609 --> 00:10:13,613 I'm sorry. I thought It was a table leg, 252 00:10:13,613 --> 00:10:15,515 A supple, Quivering table leg 253 00:10:15,515 --> 00:10:16,917 That Goes on forever. 254 00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:21,321 Just a natural mistake. 255 00:10:21,321 --> 00:10:23,657 You're still doing it. 256 00:10:23,657 --> 00:10:26,559 You have A hole in your sock. 257 00:10:26,559 --> 00:10:27,761 Like it? 258 00:10:40,373 --> 00:10:44,044 Dr. Crandell, I want You to keep your foot Where it belongs! 259 00:10:44,044 --> 00:10:44,812 Ow! 260 00:10:44,812 --> 00:10:47,447 [telephone rings] 261 00:10:47,447 --> 00:10:48,749 Dr. Crandell. 262 00:10:48,749 --> 00:10:49,717 Telephone. 263 00:10:49,717 --> 00:10:53,353 It's mrs. Dr. Crandell. 264 00:10:53,353 --> 00:10:54,755 Thank you. 265 00:10:54,755 --> 00:10:56,757 I left The number here. 266 00:10:56,757 --> 00:10:57,925 Hello, honey. 267 00:10:57,925 --> 00:11:00,694 My darling, My reason for living. 268 00:11:00,694 --> 00:11:03,263 Oh, that Slimeball hypocrite. 269 00:11:03,263 --> 00:11:04,698 What? 270 00:11:04,698 --> 00:11:07,200 That tears it. 271 00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:09,569 You--you... 272 00:11:09,569 --> 00:11:11,504 What--what was That about? 273 00:11:11,504 --> 00:11:14,607 He toed my calf. 274 00:11:14,607 --> 00:11:15,575 He what? 275 00:11:15,575 --> 00:11:16,844 Excuse me? 276 00:11:16,844 --> 00:11:19,012 He was rubbing his Foot on my leg. 277 00:11:19,012 --> 00:11:20,547 Perhaps he was Just trying to cross His legs. 278 00:11:20,547 --> 00:11:21,882 He accidentally Bumped into you. 279 00:11:21,882 --> 00:11:23,450 What do you think I am? A nitwit? 280 00:11:23,450 --> 00:11:24,752 I am Telling you that 281 00:11:24,752 --> 00:11:27,320 Your distinguished, Happily-married Friend 282 00:11:27,320 --> 00:11:28,288 Was coming on to me. 283 00:11:28,288 --> 00:11:29,790 Oh, please. He was! 284 00:11:29,790 --> 00:11:31,959 Do you realize that You're impugning The reputation of the man 285 00:11:31,959 --> 00:11:34,694 That literally Wrote the book On fidelity in marriage? 286 00:11:34,694 --> 00:11:36,396 You've insulted him, And, frankly, You've insulted me. 287 00:11:36,396 --> 00:11:37,965 You know, I see What's going on Here. 288 00:11:37,965 --> 00:11:39,599 You know, You just projected Your frustrations 289 00:11:39,599 --> 00:11:41,969 Onto somebody else Because it's Been too long 290 00:11:41,969 --> 00:11:43,737 Since you had Your tires rotated. 291 00:11:49,009 --> 00:11:51,178 And I am telling you That he is a lying, 292 00:11:51,178 --> 00:11:54,681 Hypocritical sleaze Who needs To be neutered. 293 00:11:54,681 --> 00:11:56,984 Excuse me, Frasier. 294 00:11:56,984 --> 00:11:58,919 I think I better Be moving along. 295 00:11:58,919 --> 00:12:01,822 Somehow I've Antagonized miss howe. 296 00:12:01,822 --> 00:12:03,690 Rather than provoke Any further embarrassment, 297 00:12:03,690 --> 00:12:04,992 I think it's best To simply remove 298 00:12:04,992 --> 00:12:06,426 My offending Personality. 299 00:12:06,426 --> 00:12:07,360 Oh, larry, must you? 300 00:12:07,360 --> 00:12:09,729 No, no. Dr. Crandell, Please, uh... 301 00:12:09,729 --> 00:12:11,765 See, you got to understand Something about rebecca Here. 302 00:12:11,765 --> 00:12:15,435 She's had a very difficult Past few...Life. 303 00:12:18,371 --> 00:12:20,707 I've sensed some Emotional problems there. 304 00:12:20,707 --> 00:12:21,909 Oh, it's a pity. 305 00:12:24,144 --> 00:12:25,913 The nerve Of that man 306 00:12:25,913 --> 00:12:28,681 Saying I have An emotional Problem. 307 00:12:28,681 --> 00:12:32,152 I'd like to meet him In a dark alley With a cleaver! 308 00:12:40,360 --> 00:12:41,962 Thank you, sir. 309 00:12:41,962 --> 00:12:44,264 No sirs. While We're together, 310 00:12:44,264 --> 00:12:45,833 You're not A chambermaid 311 00:12:45,833 --> 00:12:49,769 And I'm not a guest In a hotel. 312 00:12:49,769 --> 00:12:52,806 We're just two Vibrant human beings 313 00:12:52,806 --> 00:12:54,875 Ready to snatch A moment's pleasure. 314 00:12:56,076 --> 00:12:58,879 I like The way you talk. 315 00:12:58,879 --> 00:13:01,214 Boy, I've never been In one of these rooms 316 00:13:01,214 --> 00:13:03,483 Without My vacuum cleaner running. 317 00:13:04,952 --> 00:13:09,056 It's so...Um, quiet. 318 00:13:09,056 --> 00:13:10,657 It is peaceful, Isn't it? 319 00:13:10,657 --> 00:13:14,327 Oh, yeah. But you know What's really amazing About this? 320 00:13:14,327 --> 00:13:16,763 I didn't even Realize myself 321 00:13:16,763 --> 00:13:18,832 That I was Attracted to you 322 00:13:18,832 --> 00:13:22,936 Until you told me You sensed it. 323 00:13:22,936 --> 00:13:24,737 Well, Human behavior's 324 00:13:24,737 --> 00:13:27,007 Pretty much An open book to me. 325 00:13:27,007 --> 00:13:28,675 There's nothing I haven't seen 326 00:13:28,675 --> 00:13:32,012 Or read Or been told about 327 00:13:32,012 --> 00:13:35,082 Or seen Pictures of... 328 00:13:35,082 --> 00:13:37,184 Or short films... 329 00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:43,156 Well, bottoms up. 330 00:13:43,156 --> 00:13:44,958 Oh, yes. Oh, god, yes. 331 00:13:48,929 --> 00:13:50,330 [knock on door] 332 00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:52,432 Oh, no. If they find Me in here, I'll get fired. 333 00:13:52,432 --> 00:13:54,301 Oh, nonsense. I'll Get rid of them. 334 00:14:00,740 --> 00:14:01,975 Hi. It's miss howe. May I come in? 335 00:14:01,975 --> 00:14:03,510 Ordinarily, I'd say yes, 336 00:14:03,510 --> 00:14:05,512 But, you see, I'm Expecting a colleague Any minute, 337 00:14:05,512 --> 00:14:07,080 So, you see, it's really Not convenient. 338 00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:08,748 I was just thinking About something You said, 339 00:14:08,748 --> 00:14:10,417 And I wanted To clarify that. 340 00:14:10,417 --> 00:14:12,652 Terrific. We'll Have lunch tomorrow And clarify away. 341 00:14:12,652 --> 00:14:13,753 That's a great idea, 342 00:14:13,753 --> 00:14:15,022 But you know, I have been through 343 00:14:15,022 --> 00:14:17,324 So much stress and So much anxiety over this, 344 00:14:17,324 --> 00:14:19,292 That I have a terrible, Splitting headache. 345 00:14:19,292 --> 00:14:20,460 Do you have Any aspirin? 346 00:14:20,460 --> 00:14:21,328 Aspirin? 347 00:14:21,328 --> 00:14:22,529 Yes. If you give me An aspirin, 348 00:14:22,529 --> 00:14:23,964 I think it will Get rid of my headache, 349 00:14:23,964 --> 00:14:25,465 And then I can Leave you in peace. 350 00:14:25,465 --> 00:14:26,766 Right. Aspirin. 351 00:14:26,766 --> 00:14:28,401 I'll try To find you some. 352 00:14:31,905 --> 00:14:33,640 Psst. 353 00:14:33,640 --> 00:14:35,175 Get in there. 354 00:14:35,175 --> 00:14:37,144 Stupidest thing I've ever done. 355 00:14:39,079 --> 00:14:41,614 You do nine stupid things Before breakfast. 356 00:14:42,682 --> 00:14:45,085 Now, get in that closet. 357 00:14:45,085 --> 00:14:47,687 No, wait. When he admits That he came on to me, 358 00:14:47,687 --> 00:14:50,323 I want you to leap out And catch him in the act, 359 00:14:50,323 --> 00:14:52,859 And then we'll Prove once and for all 360 00:14:52,859 --> 00:14:55,495 That he is a lech And I am not cuckoo. 361 00:14:55,495 --> 00:14:58,831 Yeah, one thing At a time, rebecca. 362 00:14:58,831 --> 00:15:00,500 Two aspirin Coming up! 363 00:15:03,036 --> 00:15:05,738 Two tablets... Buffered. 364 00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:08,341 I hope They go down well. 365 00:15:08,341 --> 00:15:11,044 Bye-bye. 366 00:15:11,044 --> 00:15:13,280 Dr. Crandell. 367 00:15:13,280 --> 00:15:15,415 It's not really Why I'm here. 368 00:15:15,415 --> 00:15:16,383 It's not. 369 00:15:16,383 --> 00:15:17,884 No. 370 00:15:17,884 --> 00:15:22,055 Now, I know You came on to me, 371 00:15:22,055 --> 00:15:24,757 And you know You came on to me, 372 00:15:24,757 --> 00:15:26,093 But I'm Not leaving here 373 00:15:26,093 --> 00:15:28,595 Until you admit it. 374 00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:30,363 All right, I admit it. 375 00:15:30,363 --> 00:15:32,765 I came on to you. Good night. 376 00:15:32,765 --> 00:15:33,700 Aha! 377 00:15:37,870 --> 00:15:38,972 Aha? 378 00:15:42,775 --> 00:15:44,377 I didn't Quite hear that. 379 00:15:44,377 --> 00:15:46,779 Oh, for god's sake. Good night. 380 00:15:46,779 --> 00:15:49,882 Um, please, If you could just say it A little bit louder 381 00:15:49,882 --> 00:15:51,484 And a little clearer 382 00:15:51,484 --> 00:15:53,620 So that I know There's no mistaking it. 383 00:15:53,620 --> 00:15:55,222 All right, if that Will make you happy. 384 00:15:55,222 --> 00:15:58,325 I came on to you! I came on to you! 385 00:15:58,325 --> 00:16:00,560 You know, I'm beginning To regret it. 386 00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:02,162 Aha! 387 00:16:02,162 --> 00:16:03,863 Good night, miss howe. 388 00:16:03,863 --> 00:16:06,299 You--sam! 389 00:16:06,299 --> 00:16:08,001 Would you get The hell out of there? 390 00:16:08,001 --> 00:16:10,370 Sam? 391 00:16:10,370 --> 00:16:11,638 Whoa, boy. 392 00:16:11,638 --> 00:16:14,107 These luxury hotels Have great closets. 393 00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:22,149 Did you hear What he just said? 394 00:16:22,149 --> 00:16:23,250 Uh, no. I'm sorry. 395 00:16:23,250 --> 00:16:25,185 I sort of had Something in my ear. 396 00:16:31,358 --> 00:16:34,294 You had a woman In here. 397 00:16:34,294 --> 00:16:35,828 As long as we got That established, 398 00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:38,865 If you need me again, I'll be back By the shoe rack. 399 00:16:38,865 --> 00:16:39,766 Sam! 400 00:16:41,101 --> 00:16:42,469 Remember our mission? 401 00:16:43,870 --> 00:16:44,971 Now, listen to me. 402 00:16:44,971 --> 00:16:47,140 This proves That I am not crazy. 403 00:16:47,140 --> 00:16:48,975 This proves that He is just a lech. 404 00:16:48,975 --> 00:16:50,177 I can explain. 405 00:16:50,177 --> 00:16:53,146 Miss johnson is My executive secretary. 406 00:16:53,146 --> 00:16:55,515 We have a great deal Of dictation to get out. 407 00:16:55,515 --> 00:16:58,185 Now, if You'll excuse us... 408 00:16:58,185 --> 00:16:59,586 You sent For a violinist. 409 00:17:02,255 --> 00:17:05,558 A violinist to do Your dictation? 410 00:17:05,558 --> 00:17:07,260 Come on. 411 00:17:07,260 --> 00:17:09,129 Now at least For god's sake 412 00:17:09,129 --> 00:17:10,830 Have the decency To come clean 413 00:17:10,830 --> 00:17:14,101 And tell sam The truth. 414 00:17:14,101 --> 00:17:15,302 All right. 415 00:17:15,302 --> 00:17:17,837 I admit It is true. 416 00:17:17,837 --> 00:17:19,172 I've been A very lonely man. 417 00:17:19,172 --> 00:17:20,307 I thought this trip 418 00:17:20,307 --> 00:17:22,142 Would put my convictions To the test, 419 00:17:22,142 --> 00:17:25,545 But I'm afraid I came up lacking. 420 00:17:25,545 --> 00:17:29,582 I'm sorry if I Caused you any pain, Miss howe. 421 00:17:29,582 --> 00:17:31,451 Well, at least you Finally admitted it. 422 00:17:31,451 --> 00:17:33,786 Yes. I'm glad The truth is out. 423 00:17:33,786 --> 00:17:35,755 At last. No more lying. 424 00:17:35,755 --> 00:17:37,557 No more deceit. 425 00:17:37,557 --> 00:17:38,958 [knock knock] 426 00:17:38,958 --> 00:17:41,094 Lawrence, Guess who? 427 00:17:42,862 --> 00:17:44,264 It's my wife. Hide. 428 00:17:46,166 --> 00:17:48,301 I'm not going In a closet. 429 00:17:48,301 --> 00:17:49,436 Oh, come on. You'll enjoy it. 430 00:17:49,436 --> 00:17:52,339 I'll show you Around. 431 00:17:52,339 --> 00:17:53,940 Please. Please, you must. 432 00:17:53,940 --> 00:17:54,907 My career is At stake. 433 00:17:54,907 --> 00:17:56,343 So is my marriage. 434 00:17:56,343 --> 00:17:58,645 I've been faithful To this woman For 15 years, 435 00:17:58,645 --> 00:18:00,347 Mostly because she's The scariest bitch 436 00:18:00,347 --> 00:18:04,016 You'd ever Want to meet. 437 00:18:04,016 --> 00:18:06,819 Lawrence, Are you all right? 438 00:18:06,819 --> 00:18:09,556 I am doing this For your wife, Buster. 439 00:18:09,556 --> 00:18:11,258 Rebecca, I want you To meet maria. 440 00:18:11,258 --> 00:18:12,625 Maria, rebecca. 441 00:18:12,625 --> 00:18:14,694 What's your name? Zoltan. 442 00:18:14,694 --> 00:18:15,662 [knock knock] 443 00:18:15,662 --> 00:18:16,429 Lawrence? 444 00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:18,198 Yes. Coming. Coming. 445 00:18:19,132 --> 00:18:21,033 Oh, valerie, Darling. 446 00:18:21,033 --> 00:18:22,602 What an enormous Surprise. 447 00:18:22,602 --> 00:18:24,504 What took you so long To answer the door? 448 00:18:24,504 --> 00:18:25,805 Well, It's this plush carpet. 449 00:18:25,805 --> 00:18:28,007 I caught my little toe. 450 00:18:28,007 --> 00:18:29,209 What brings you here? 451 00:18:29,209 --> 00:18:30,510 Well, when I spoke To you on the phone 452 00:18:30,510 --> 00:18:32,812 And I heard the hunger In that voice, 453 00:18:32,812 --> 00:18:37,384 I couldn't bear To be separated From you one more minute. 454 00:18:37,384 --> 00:18:39,619 Champagne, Lawrence? 455 00:18:39,619 --> 00:18:42,222 Oh, yes. They bring It up every night. 456 00:18:42,222 --> 00:18:44,724 It's a fabulous hotel. 457 00:18:44,724 --> 00:18:46,058 Let's go get Something to eat. 458 00:18:46,058 --> 00:18:47,227 You're not dressed. 459 00:18:47,227 --> 00:18:48,628 Well, we'll go Someplace casual. 460 00:18:48,628 --> 00:18:50,630 Well, at least Put on a coat. It's cool out. 461 00:18:50,630 --> 00:18:53,566 I'll buy one On the way. Shall we? 462 00:18:53,566 --> 00:18:55,702 Lawrence, Put on a coat. 463 00:18:55,702 --> 00:18:56,903 Right. 464 00:18:56,903 --> 00:18:57,870 Anything You say, dear. 465 00:18:57,870 --> 00:18:59,206 I'll just... 466 00:18:59,206 --> 00:19:02,242 * go to the closet All by myself * 467 00:19:03,576 --> 00:19:06,513 * get my coat All by myself * 468 00:19:10,116 --> 00:19:12,018 I've never seen you In that coat. 469 00:19:12,018 --> 00:19:13,353 Well, I just bought it. 470 00:19:13,353 --> 00:19:16,022 If you don't like it, Back it goes. 471 00:19:16,022 --> 00:19:17,824 No, lawrence. Put it on. 472 00:19:17,824 --> 00:19:18,825 Put it on now. 473 00:19:25,131 --> 00:19:27,099 Oh, that tailor. 474 00:19:27,099 --> 00:19:29,101 Well, I'm stopping The payment 475 00:19:29,101 --> 00:19:30,270 On that check. 476 00:19:34,474 --> 00:19:36,343 Oh, I'm famished. Let's go. 477 00:19:36,343 --> 00:19:37,410 Whoever is In that closet, 478 00:19:37,410 --> 00:19:39,346 Come out This instant. 479 00:19:55,428 --> 00:19:58,030 All right. I want An explanation, 480 00:19:58,030 --> 00:19:59,766 And I want it Right this minute. 481 00:19:59,766 --> 00:20:01,668 Otherwise, I am going to Divorce him. 482 00:20:01,668 --> 00:20:03,169 I am going To take his money, 483 00:20:03,169 --> 00:20:06,373 And I am going to Take his reputation And his career, 484 00:20:06,373 --> 00:20:08,475 And after that, I am Going to do the same 485 00:20:08,475 --> 00:20:10,977 For each and every One of you, 486 00:20:10,977 --> 00:20:15,047 And believe me, I can do it. 487 00:20:15,047 --> 00:20:16,916 So who is going To come forth 488 00:20:16,916 --> 00:20:18,351 With an explanation? 489 00:20:23,290 --> 00:20:25,157 Um... 490 00:20:25,157 --> 00:20:26,359 We, uh... 491 00:20:26,359 --> 00:20:27,594 We're all here To, ahem, 492 00:20:27,594 --> 00:20:30,697 Change The light bulb. 493 00:20:30,697 --> 00:20:31,664 God! 494 00:20:31,664 --> 00:20:32,599 Mrs. Crandell, 495 00:20:32,599 --> 00:20:34,334 I'm going to tell you The truth 496 00:20:34,334 --> 00:20:36,903 Because I feel that this Has gone on too long. 497 00:20:36,903 --> 00:20:40,807 And as usual, I have to be The voice of reason. 498 00:20:44,511 --> 00:20:45,878 Forgive me For saying this, 499 00:20:45,878 --> 00:20:49,882 But if I were in your shoes, I would want to know. 500 00:20:49,882 --> 00:20:53,353 Your husband Came on to me In a local bar. 501 00:20:55,388 --> 00:20:56,956 You mean He propositioned you? 502 00:20:58,658 --> 00:21:02,495 Well, he didn't exactly Proposition me. 503 00:21:02,495 --> 00:21:06,466 Well, what exactly Did he do? 504 00:21:06,466 --> 00:21:08,468 He asked me About my feelings. 505 00:21:09,736 --> 00:21:11,738 That is his field, You know. 506 00:21:14,006 --> 00:21:16,309 That isn't All he did. 507 00:21:16,309 --> 00:21:20,380 He rubbed my leg With his disgusting foot. 508 00:21:20,380 --> 00:21:22,382 She never gets tired Of telling this. 509 00:21:22,382 --> 00:21:23,950 Over and over. 510 00:21:26,486 --> 00:21:28,388 Yes. Yes, I admit it. 511 00:21:28,388 --> 00:21:29,589 I accidentally 512 00:21:29,589 --> 00:21:31,290 Brushed up against her leg With my foot. 513 00:21:31,290 --> 00:21:33,025 I apologized Profusely. 514 00:21:35,227 --> 00:21:36,763 He did not Have his shoe on. 515 00:21:38,531 --> 00:21:40,132 It was hot in there. 516 00:21:40,132 --> 00:21:42,569 Would you Believe the humiliation? 517 00:21:42,569 --> 00:21:45,472 A hole In my $50 hosiery. 518 00:21:45,472 --> 00:21:48,307 Why, You filthy doub-- 519 00:21:48,307 --> 00:21:49,876 Ok, fine. Fine. 520 00:21:49,876 --> 00:21:51,944 There is A chambermaid In the room. 521 00:21:51,944 --> 00:21:53,045 Explain it. 522 00:21:53,045 --> 00:21:55,047 A chambermaid In a hotel. 523 00:21:55,047 --> 00:21:57,784 Will wonders Never cease? 524 00:21:57,784 --> 00:21:59,786 You know, actually, we're Going to be running along. 525 00:21:59,786 --> 00:22:02,355 No, we're not going to Be running along. 526 00:22:02,355 --> 00:22:03,790 All right. 527 00:22:03,790 --> 00:22:05,858 How about The fiddler, huh? 528 00:22:08,528 --> 00:22:09,862 I was lonely. 529 00:22:09,862 --> 00:22:12,699 I was going to have him Play our song all night. 530 00:22:12,699 --> 00:22:14,834 All right. All right. 531 00:22:14,834 --> 00:22:17,704 So have your Loving husband Explain 532 00:22:17,704 --> 00:22:21,441 Why the four of us Were in that closet. 533 00:22:21,441 --> 00:22:22,442 You were there. 534 00:22:22,442 --> 00:22:25,111 You mean Don't you know? 535 00:22:25,111 --> 00:22:27,179 Yes, I know. 536 00:22:27,179 --> 00:22:29,181 Because you are The scariest bitch 537 00:22:29,181 --> 00:22:30,617 We would ever Want to meet. 538 00:22:32,852 --> 00:22:36,756 And you are A little tramp. 539 00:22:36,756 --> 00:22:38,758 Tramp? 540 00:22:38,758 --> 00:22:40,460 I ought to Punch you one. 541 00:22:40,460 --> 00:22:42,161 I ought to kill Your husband! 542 00:22:42,161 --> 00:22:43,129 I'm going to kill him! 543 00:22:43,129 --> 00:22:44,731 I'm going to kill you! 544 00:22:44,731 --> 00:22:48,200 You're stupid, And he's a fraud! He's a psycho! 545 00:22:48,200 --> 00:22:51,971 I'm going to hunt you down And kill you like a dog. 546 00:22:51,971 --> 00:22:55,575 And why don't You get yourself Some new socks, buster? 547 00:22:59,412 --> 00:23:00,947 I can explain Everything here. 548 00:23:00,947 --> 00:23:04,383 She just wanted To convince me That she's not crazy. 37998

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.