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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,302 --> 00:00:04,205 "Cheers" is filmed before A live studio audience. 2 00:00:05,606 --> 00:00:06,440 Hi, everybody. 3 00:00:06,440 --> 00:00:08,776 Hey. Hi. Hey, sammy. 4 00:00:08,776 --> 00:00:09,943 Where's rebecca? 5 00:00:09,943 --> 00:00:11,512 In her office. Why? 6 00:00:11,512 --> 00:00:14,348 Today's the day A certain chestnut Brown-haired beauty 7 00:00:14,348 --> 00:00:17,451 Is gonna succumb To the charms Of sammy. 8 00:00:17,451 --> 00:00:20,054 [all laugh] 9 00:00:20,054 --> 00:00:21,189 Laugh if you will, 10 00:00:21,189 --> 00:00:22,890 But according to My calculations, 11 00:00:22,890 --> 00:00:24,192 The timing is perfect. 12 00:00:24,192 --> 00:00:25,259 I've waited long enough 13 00:00:25,259 --> 00:00:27,095 For her to get over Evan drake, 14 00:00:27,095 --> 00:00:30,231 But not long enough For her to build up Her resistance again. 15 00:00:30,231 --> 00:00:33,534 The way I see it, I've got about a half-hour Window of opportunity 16 00:00:33,534 --> 00:00:35,403 Opening up here. 17 00:00:35,403 --> 00:00:38,472 I'm telling you, boys, Rebecca howe is mine. 18 00:00:38,472 --> 00:00:41,675 That's it! All right! 19 00:00:41,675 --> 00:00:42,910 Sammy! Sammy! 20 00:00:42,910 --> 00:00:45,879 Sammy! Sammy! 21 00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:47,348 Rebecca: yes. 22 00:00:47,348 --> 00:00:49,483 Ooh. He's got her Saying yes already. 23 00:00:52,186 --> 00:00:53,854 Not a devout Nun's prayer. 24 00:00:53,854 --> 00:00:55,789 No, sir. 25 00:01:00,194 --> 00:01:02,330 * making your way In the world today * 26 00:01:02,330 --> 00:01:05,399 * takes everything You've got * 27 00:01:05,399 --> 00:01:08,202 * taking a break From all your worries * 28 00:01:08,202 --> 00:01:11,505 * sure would help a lot * 29 00:01:11,505 --> 00:01:14,808 * wouldn't you like To get away? * 30 00:01:17,378 --> 00:01:19,213 * sometimes You want to go * 31 00:01:19,213 --> 00:01:22,683 * where everybody Knows your name * 32 00:01:24,552 --> 00:01:29,190 * and they're always Glad you came * 33 00:01:29,190 --> 00:01:31,492 * you want to be Where you can see * 34 00:01:31,492 --> 00:01:34,027 * our troubles Are all the same * 35 00:01:34,027 --> 00:01:39,433 * you want to be where everybody Knows your name * 36 00:01:39,433 --> 00:01:42,035 * you want to go Where people know * 37 00:01:42,035 --> 00:01:44,472 * people are all the same * 38 00:01:44,472 --> 00:01:49,810 * you want to go where Everybody knows your name * 39 00:02:08,829 --> 00:02:10,464 So what you Got there? 40 00:02:10,464 --> 00:02:12,433 A mercedes catalogue. 41 00:02:12,433 --> 00:02:13,934 I'm thinking Of getting one. 42 00:02:13,934 --> 00:02:17,505 Yeah, I hear good things About those catalogues. 43 00:02:17,505 --> 00:02:19,307 What, you got a raise Or something? 44 00:02:19,307 --> 00:02:22,276 No. I can only afford The cheapest model, 45 00:02:22,276 --> 00:02:24,512 And I'll have to give up Lunches until I-- 46 00:02:24,512 --> 00:02:26,580 Well, I'll have to Give up lunches, 47 00:02:26,580 --> 00:02:29,116 But it will still be A mercedes. 48 00:02:29,116 --> 00:02:30,518 Speaking of mercedes, 49 00:02:30,518 --> 00:02:34,388 I'm kind of known As the mercedes of guys. 50 00:02:34,388 --> 00:02:36,724 Really? I always thought 51 00:02:36,724 --> 00:02:40,928 You were more of A cheap pickup with A headlight missing. 52 00:02:40,928 --> 00:02:42,730 Did you want Something, sam? 53 00:02:42,730 --> 00:02:45,933 Rebecca, how long Have we known each other? 54 00:02:45,933 --> 00:02:48,902 No, I will not Go out with you. 55 00:02:48,902 --> 00:02:51,439 What makes you think That I was going to Ask you for a date? 56 00:02:51,439 --> 00:02:52,973 You must really Think you look Hot tonight. 57 00:02:52,973 --> 00:02:54,808 Then why did you Come in here? 58 00:02:54,808 --> 00:02:57,745 Well, I was going To compliment you On your blouse. 59 00:02:57,745 --> 00:02:59,547 That's a very Pretty blouse. 60 00:02:59,547 --> 00:03:01,549 Well, we haven't Seen each other Today until now. 61 00:03:01,549 --> 00:03:03,584 How did you know I'd be wearing This one? 62 00:03:03,584 --> 00:03:05,686 I was hoping you Were going to wear it. 63 00:03:05,686 --> 00:03:07,655 It's always been My favorite blouse. 64 00:03:07,655 --> 00:03:09,790 It's brand-new. It's the first time I've worn it. 65 00:03:09,790 --> 00:03:12,293 I'm working part-time In department store Security. 66 00:03:12,293 --> 00:03:14,194 I was in the store When you bought it. 67 00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:15,996 I bought it Mail-order. 68 00:03:15,996 --> 00:03:18,131 I drove the truck That delivered it To your house. 69 00:03:18,131 --> 00:03:20,234 One date! Come on. Please. 70 00:03:20,234 --> 00:03:21,569 What, It's gonna kill you? 71 00:03:21,569 --> 00:03:23,271 Men. You're all alike-- 72 00:03:23,271 --> 00:03:25,473 Nothing but users and takers And big stupid jerks 73 00:03:25,473 --> 00:03:27,408 Who don't even Know you exist, 74 00:03:27,408 --> 00:03:30,744 And then go running off To japan with someone else. 75 00:03:32,246 --> 00:03:34,848 That is such A cliche. 76 00:03:36,784 --> 00:03:38,051 Come on, Please-- 77 00:03:38,051 --> 00:03:41,054 Forget it. I'm concentrating On my career. 78 00:03:41,054 --> 00:03:44,057 I happen to think I have a real future With this company. 79 00:03:44,057 --> 00:03:46,694 No offense, but why? 80 00:03:48,228 --> 00:03:49,797 Because I think It's my time. 81 00:03:49,797 --> 00:03:52,500 You know, evan took A lot of key people With him to japan. 82 00:03:52,500 --> 00:03:54,535 And the way I figure it, 83 00:03:54,535 --> 00:03:58,606 Everyone who knows I'm a washout Is gone. 84 00:03:58,606 --> 00:04:00,073 Talk about Sitting pretty. 85 00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:01,575 You bet. 86 00:04:01,575 --> 00:04:03,043 The new executive Vice president 87 00:04:03,043 --> 00:04:04,144 Mr. Stone Has been doing 88 00:04:04,144 --> 00:04:05,279 A little Housecleaning 89 00:04:05,279 --> 00:04:06,914 At the corporate Level. 90 00:04:06,914 --> 00:04:10,250 From where I am, It could be just a short Climb to the top. 91 00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:13,020 Speaking of climbing To the top, 92 00:04:13,020 --> 00:04:14,622 The way I see it, 93 00:04:14,622 --> 00:04:16,924 You haven't had a date With a guy for about 2-1/2 years. 94 00:04:16,924 --> 00:04:19,293 Now, I think This date of ours Could be good for me, 95 00:04:19,293 --> 00:04:20,861 But, sweetheart, I got to say, 96 00:04:20,861 --> 00:04:23,431 It's looking real Necessary for you. 97 00:04:23,431 --> 00:04:25,966 Sam, no. We're starting To become good friends. 98 00:04:25,966 --> 00:04:27,701 Now, why wreck that? 99 00:04:27,701 --> 00:04:31,204 Friends tell friends Who they think they Ought to go out with. 100 00:04:31,204 --> 00:04:32,840 As a friend, I'm telling you, 101 00:04:32,840 --> 00:04:36,243 I'm telling you You ought to give this Malone guy a chance. 102 00:04:36,243 --> 00:04:38,779 Ooh. Ooh. Oh. 103 00:04:39,913 --> 00:04:42,716 All right. 104 00:04:42,716 --> 00:04:43,584 What? 105 00:04:43,584 --> 00:04:46,153 I'll go out With you. 106 00:04:46,153 --> 00:04:48,055 That is great. 107 00:04:48,055 --> 00:04:49,557 That's great. All right. 108 00:04:49,557 --> 00:04:52,159 Um...I'll pick you up-- 109 00:04:52,159 --> 00:04:55,062 Just for future Reference here, 110 00:04:55,062 --> 00:04:57,197 What did I do right This time? 111 00:04:57,197 --> 00:04:59,533 It's just since Evan went away, 112 00:04:59,533 --> 00:05:01,068 My expectations Are low. 113 00:05:02,536 --> 00:05:04,137 And with my stove On the blink 114 00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:05,339 And nothing On the tube tonight, 115 00:05:05,339 --> 00:05:07,475 I figured--pff-- Why not? 116 00:05:11,745 --> 00:05:14,081 Thanks. Yeah. I'll have to Remember that. 117 00:05:15,983 --> 00:05:17,785 8:00? Ok. 118 00:05:17,785 --> 00:05:19,587 And let's just keep This between us. 119 00:05:19,587 --> 00:05:21,689 I don't want those Bozos out there 120 00:05:21,689 --> 00:05:23,557 Turning this Into a circus. 121 00:05:23,557 --> 00:05:25,693 Oh, no. I couldn't agree With you more. 122 00:05:27,895 --> 00:05:30,898 Hey! Yay! Yay! 123 00:05:30,898 --> 00:05:33,066 Lucky guess. 124 00:05:41,642 --> 00:05:44,778 Whoo! Yo! Check it out! 125 00:05:45,979 --> 00:05:47,448 Sammy, you might as well 126 00:05:47,448 --> 00:05:49,583 Make that entry in Your diary right now, 127 00:05:49,583 --> 00:05:52,620 Because no mortal woman Can resist this package. 128 00:05:52,620 --> 00:05:54,455 No, no, we're just Having dinner. 129 00:05:54,455 --> 00:05:56,790 Oh, right. Yeah. 130 00:05:56,790 --> 00:05:59,960 Columbus was just Going on a little Boat ride, huh? 131 00:05:59,960 --> 00:06:02,763 Uh, it turns out That's true. 132 00:06:04,632 --> 00:06:06,434 He told the missus he was Just stepping out for lunch 133 00:06:06,434 --> 00:06:10,337 And took a left instead Of a right at the isles Of langerhans, 134 00:06:10,337 --> 00:06:11,905 And before you knew it, 135 00:06:11,905 --> 00:06:14,742 He was trading trinkets For miami beach. 136 00:06:14,742 --> 00:06:16,677 Cliff, you should Write a book. 137 00:06:16,677 --> 00:06:19,179 Why, thank you, carla. 138 00:06:19,179 --> 00:06:21,381 No, I mean right now. 139 00:06:23,016 --> 00:06:24,585 [laughs] I mean it. 140 00:06:24,585 --> 00:06:28,021 Look, here's a pencil And some paper. 141 00:06:28,021 --> 00:06:29,490 Go on in the back room 142 00:06:29,490 --> 00:06:32,826 And don't come out until You have 60,000 words. 143 00:06:45,906 --> 00:06:47,475 Go on. 144 00:06:54,448 --> 00:06:55,816 Rebecca: I'll be right there. 145 00:06:55,816 --> 00:06:58,819 Look at that. That really Takes me back, you know? 146 00:06:58,819 --> 00:07:00,821 I remember My first date with vera-- 147 00:07:00,821 --> 00:07:03,524 The flowers, The candy, the wine. 148 00:07:03,524 --> 00:07:05,158 Sounds pretty Romantic, norm. 149 00:07:05,158 --> 00:07:06,894 Yeah, it was. 150 00:07:06,894 --> 00:07:08,361 In retrospect, 151 00:07:08,361 --> 00:07:11,799 I suppose I should have Gotten her something, but... 152 00:07:11,799 --> 00:07:15,669 I guess you can't Turn back that clock, Can you? 153 00:07:15,669 --> 00:07:18,572 Uh, here you go. 154 00:07:18,572 --> 00:07:21,008 I just brought these in So they could see 155 00:07:21,008 --> 00:07:23,210 What a real long-stemmed Beauty looks like. 156 00:07:23,210 --> 00:07:25,378 Thank you, sam. 157 00:07:25,378 --> 00:07:27,515 Shall we go? It's just dinner. 158 00:07:27,515 --> 00:07:29,016 Yeah, dinner. Right. Absolutely. 159 00:07:29,016 --> 00:07:32,019 Good night, fellas. Don't wait up for us. 160 00:07:32,019 --> 00:07:34,622 Hey! Yeah! 161 00:07:34,622 --> 00:07:37,090 Ohh! My god, It's him! 162 00:07:37,090 --> 00:07:38,526 Who's him? 163 00:07:38,526 --> 00:07:40,694 Greg stone. The new exec vp. 164 00:07:40,694 --> 00:07:42,496 I saw his picture In the company newsletter. 165 00:07:42,496 --> 00:07:45,132 Mr. Stone, Welcome, welcome! 166 00:07:45,132 --> 00:07:47,234 It's such an honor To have you here. 167 00:07:47,234 --> 00:07:49,469 Mr. Stone, I'd like you To meet sam malone. 168 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:52,039 Pleased to meet you, Sam. Yeah. 169 00:07:52,039 --> 00:07:52,940 Who are you? 170 00:07:52,940 --> 00:07:56,076 Rebecca howe. I'm the manager. 171 00:07:56,076 --> 00:07:58,746 Ahh. Of course. 172 00:07:58,746 --> 00:08:00,714 I'd like to Use your phone, If I may. 173 00:08:00,714 --> 00:08:03,116 You can do Anything you want With my phone. 174 00:08:03,116 --> 00:08:04,384 Thank you. 175 00:08:04,384 --> 00:08:06,419 For the moment, I thought I'd just Speak into it. 176 00:08:06,419 --> 00:08:07,621 Good choice. 177 00:08:07,621 --> 00:08:09,957 Ok, come on, let's go, Sweetheart. 178 00:08:09,957 --> 00:08:11,224 We're Going to be late. 179 00:08:11,224 --> 00:08:12,860 He could very well be 180 00:08:12,860 --> 00:08:14,995 The most handsome man I have ever seen. 181 00:08:14,995 --> 00:08:16,997 Ohh! Ohh! 182 00:08:16,997 --> 00:08:19,533 And did you see the way He looked in my eyes 183 00:08:19,533 --> 00:08:21,334 When he said, "Who are you?" 184 00:08:21,334 --> 00:08:22,703 I think He really likes me. 185 00:08:22,703 --> 00:08:24,805 We all do, honey. Now, let's go. 186 00:08:24,805 --> 00:08:26,273 No, sam, you Don't understand. 187 00:08:26,273 --> 00:08:28,008 He's the man I've been giving My accounts to 188 00:08:28,008 --> 00:08:29,309 For the last Couple of weeks. 189 00:08:29,309 --> 00:08:31,511 I think He could be my Ticket to corporate. 190 00:08:31,511 --> 00:08:33,113 Miss howe, I'd like to see you 191 00:08:33,113 --> 00:08:36,049 In my office Tomorrow morning At 9 a.M. 192 00:08:36,049 --> 00:08:37,484 What did I tell you? 193 00:08:37,484 --> 00:08:39,653 Well, yeah, That's great. Now, let's go celebrate. 194 00:08:39,653 --> 00:08:41,955 Oh, excuse me! Excuse me, sir! 195 00:08:41,955 --> 00:08:43,824 As long as you were Going to tell me anyway, 196 00:08:43,824 --> 00:08:45,726 Why don't you Just go ahead And tell me now? 197 00:08:45,726 --> 00:08:47,494 This is not the time Or the place. 198 00:08:47,494 --> 00:08:48,962 Oh, please tell me. 199 00:08:48,962 --> 00:08:50,998 You've been Going over my files? 200 00:08:50,998 --> 00:08:52,365 Yes, I have. 201 00:08:52,365 --> 00:08:53,934 And we're doing Better? 202 00:08:53,934 --> 00:08:55,435 Yes, we're doing Better. 203 00:08:55,435 --> 00:08:56,870 Well, then what's The problem? 204 00:08:56,870 --> 00:08:58,205 Just go ahead And tell me. 205 00:08:58,205 --> 00:08:59,940 I really think we should Discuss this privately. 206 00:08:59,940 --> 00:09:03,276 Pal, just between Us guys here, 207 00:09:03,276 --> 00:09:04,712 Do me a favor And tell her. 208 00:09:04,712 --> 00:09:08,348 It would kind of help Grease the old skids. 209 00:09:08,348 --> 00:09:09,617 I really don't-- 210 00:09:09,617 --> 00:09:12,152 Sir, excuse me, Please. Please. 211 00:09:12,152 --> 00:09:14,554 Very well, miss howe, If you insist. 212 00:09:14,554 --> 00:09:17,758 This quarter has shown A slight improvement. 213 00:09:17,758 --> 00:09:18,826 Did you hear that, Everybody? 214 00:09:18,826 --> 00:09:20,894 A slight Improvement. 215 00:09:20,894 --> 00:09:23,463 Yes, but the records Show unequivocally 216 00:09:23,463 --> 00:09:24,898 That the bar did better 217 00:09:24,898 --> 00:09:27,167 Under sam's direction Than yours. 218 00:09:27,167 --> 00:09:28,268 In view of this, 219 00:09:28,268 --> 00:09:30,738 I'm hereby appointing Sam the new manager. 220 00:09:30,738 --> 00:09:32,172 And I regret to say, 221 00:09:32,172 --> 00:09:34,441 I'm forced To give you notice. 222 00:09:34,441 --> 00:09:36,610 I'm sorry. 223 00:09:36,610 --> 00:09:39,146 Ok, boys, dessert. 224 00:09:48,255 --> 00:09:49,189 Well, what do you say 225 00:09:49,189 --> 00:09:51,992 We go strap on The old feed bag, huh? 226 00:09:54,394 --> 00:09:56,764 You coming? 227 00:09:58,431 --> 00:09:59,867 Uh... 228 00:09:59,867 --> 00:10:02,736 You guys Want to help me Get her into the car? 229 00:10:04,905 --> 00:10:06,774 I'll get the door. 230 00:10:09,242 --> 00:10:12,245 This is going to be A lot easier Than I thought. 231 00:10:27,427 --> 00:10:28,729 Two amstel lights. 232 00:10:28,729 --> 00:10:30,297 I don't know, carla... 233 00:10:30,297 --> 00:10:32,766 Either managing a bar Is getting a lot More complicated 234 00:10:32,766 --> 00:10:34,367 Or I'm getting A lot dumber. 235 00:10:34,367 --> 00:10:37,671 You couldn't be Getting any Dumber, sam. 236 00:10:37,671 --> 00:10:40,507 Well, it must be That other thing, then. 237 00:10:40,507 --> 00:10:42,743 You know, having you Back in charge 238 00:10:42,743 --> 00:10:44,678 Really reminds me Of old times, You know? 239 00:10:44,678 --> 00:10:46,413 I mean, Real old times. 240 00:10:46,413 --> 00:10:48,615 Even before The evil days 241 00:10:48,615 --> 00:10:51,618 When darkness fell Over the earth. 242 00:10:51,618 --> 00:10:54,154 She means When diane Was still here. 243 00:10:54,154 --> 00:10:58,591 I know precisely What she means. 244 00:10:58,591 --> 00:11:00,660 [telephone rings] 245 00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:02,830 Cheers. 246 00:11:02,830 --> 00:11:04,564 Sam, it's mr. Stone For you. 247 00:11:04,564 --> 00:11:06,666 Uh, put him on hold, There, woody. 248 00:11:06,666 --> 00:11:09,169 Damn, I bet he Wants those figures. 249 00:11:17,845 --> 00:11:19,379 Hello, woody. 250 00:11:21,782 --> 00:11:23,283 Miss howe? 251 00:11:23,283 --> 00:11:24,384 Woody, where's sam? 252 00:11:24,384 --> 00:11:25,853 In his office-- 253 00:11:25,853 --> 00:11:27,855 Well, I mean, In your-- 254 00:11:27,855 --> 00:11:29,857 In your old-- 255 00:11:31,024 --> 00:11:33,927 I haven't seen him. 256 00:11:38,198 --> 00:11:39,632 Hello. 257 00:11:39,632 --> 00:11:42,435 Love your hairdo. 258 00:11:51,544 --> 00:11:53,513 [knock on door] 259 00:11:53,513 --> 00:11:55,148 Yeah, it's open. 260 00:12:03,857 --> 00:12:06,860 Sweetheart, What happened? 261 00:12:06,860 --> 00:12:11,899 I just had to knock On my own office door. 262 00:12:11,899 --> 00:12:14,167 Oh, I'm so sorry. 263 00:12:14,167 --> 00:12:15,302 I swear to god 264 00:12:15,302 --> 00:12:16,669 I didn't want this To happen. 265 00:12:16,669 --> 00:12:18,438 I know. 266 00:12:18,438 --> 00:12:20,540 It's not your fault. 267 00:12:20,540 --> 00:12:22,709 I know Why it happened-- 268 00:12:22,709 --> 00:12:25,879 Because I'm a loser. 269 00:12:25,879 --> 00:12:28,681 I always have been, And I always will be 270 00:12:28,681 --> 00:12:32,820 A big, old, fat, old, Stupid loser. 271 00:12:32,820 --> 00:12:34,855 You're not a loser. Don't say that. 272 00:12:34,855 --> 00:12:35,923 Do you hear me? 273 00:12:35,923 --> 00:12:37,357 You are not a loser. 274 00:12:37,357 --> 00:12:39,092 Ok. 275 00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:42,362 Do you have A barrette for this Or something? 276 00:12:44,297 --> 00:12:46,867 I lost it. 277 00:12:46,867 --> 00:12:49,236 Well, sweetheart, Don't worry about-- 278 00:12:49,236 --> 00:12:50,470 Don't worry About that. 279 00:12:50,470 --> 00:12:52,039 It'll be all right. 280 00:12:52,039 --> 00:12:54,207 Hey, you know what might Make you feel better? 281 00:12:54,207 --> 00:12:56,276 We never had That date, you know. 282 00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:58,478 Oh, god! 283 00:13:00,547 --> 00:13:02,249 You just Go back over there 284 00:13:02,249 --> 00:13:04,117 And do whatever It was you were doing. 285 00:13:04,117 --> 00:13:06,553 I will get out of your Life forever. 286 00:13:06,553 --> 00:13:07,955 Rebecca, I-- 287 00:13:07,955 --> 00:13:10,523 Sam, please, it will Make it a lot easier. 288 00:13:17,264 --> 00:13:18,198 You know, 289 00:13:18,198 --> 00:13:21,234 I might just Become a bag lady. 290 00:13:22,903 --> 00:13:25,605 They're not all old, You know. 291 00:13:25,605 --> 00:13:27,941 It could happen. 292 00:13:29,409 --> 00:13:31,444 It really could. 293 00:13:32,846 --> 00:13:36,549 I'll just send For the rest of my things. 294 00:13:36,549 --> 00:13:38,518 Rebecca, Wait a second. 295 00:13:38,518 --> 00:13:39,586 Honey, listen. 296 00:13:39,586 --> 00:13:40,921 Sam, stone's still on hold. 297 00:13:40,921 --> 00:13:43,056 He needs those figures On the double. 298 00:13:45,625 --> 00:13:46,894 Hold it. 299 00:13:52,665 --> 00:13:53,766 [beeping] 300 00:13:53,766 --> 00:13:56,069 Well, what The hell is that? 301 00:13:56,069 --> 00:13:58,305 I'm no computer expert, 302 00:13:58,305 --> 00:14:00,073 But it looks Like donkey kong. 303 00:14:00,073 --> 00:14:03,043 Oh, man, that's it. 304 00:14:03,043 --> 00:14:04,511 You know, I... 305 00:14:04,511 --> 00:14:07,114 It's not Like it used to be Around here, carla. 306 00:14:07,114 --> 00:14:09,816 I mean, corporations, Computers, reports. 307 00:14:09,816 --> 00:14:12,419 I used to keep track Of inventory 308 00:14:12,419 --> 00:14:14,888 In a spiral notebook, For god's sake. 309 00:14:14,888 --> 00:14:16,356 No, you didn't. 310 00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:17,590 I always meant to. 311 00:14:20,894 --> 00:14:22,695 I just hate being In charge. 312 00:14:22,695 --> 00:14:23,897 I'm not good at it. 313 00:14:23,897 --> 00:14:25,632 Rebecca wasn't good At it, either, 314 00:14:25,632 --> 00:14:27,267 But at least She enjoyed it. 315 00:14:27,267 --> 00:14:29,836 You know, I'm going To go back to stone, 316 00:14:29,836 --> 00:14:32,039 And I'm gonna Beg him to give her This job back. 317 00:14:32,039 --> 00:14:33,640 Wait a minute. 318 00:14:33,640 --> 00:14:35,842 You're Quitting because Of this machine? 319 00:14:35,842 --> 00:14:37,710 Carla, I hate that machine. 320 00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:40,513 John henry hated A machine, too. 321 00:14:40,513 --> 00:14:43,183 Do you know the story Of john henry, sam? 322 00:14:43,183 --> 00:14:46,586 He went toe-to-toe with A steel-driving machine, 323 00:14:46,586 --> 00:14:50,657 And he refused to admit That that machine Was better than him. 324 00:14:50,657 --> 00:14:51,724 And you know What happened? 325 00:14:51,724 --> 00:14:53,226 Yeah. The machine beat him. 326 00:14:53,226 --> 00:14:55,195 His heart exploded. He died. 327 00:14:56,896 --> 00:14:58,065 He did? 328 00:14:59,699 --> 00:15:00,900 Yes. 329 00:15:00,900 --> 00:15:02,502 Well, Go get her job back 330 00:15:02,502 --> 00:15:05,038 Before you lose Your temper. Come on! 331 00:15:10,910 --> 00:15:12,445 Whoa. How'd it go? 332 00:15:12,445 --> 00:15:16,416 Woody, give me A seltzer there, Will you? 333 00:15:16,416 --> 00:15:18,751 Mr. Stone was dead set Against rehiring her, 334 00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:21,955 And I hate to beg When sex isn't involved. 335 00:15:24,091 --> 00:15:25,892 So what happened? 336 00:15:25,892 --> 00:15:27,427 Well, I had To promise 337 00:15:27,427 --> 00:15:29,729 That she'd agree To a whole list Of conditions. 338 00:15:29,729 --> 00:15:31,064 He finally said yes. 339 00:15:31,064 --> 00:15:33,000 I left a message on Her answering machine 340 00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:34,234 That I wanted To talk to her. 341 00:15:34,234 --> 00:15:35,768 What are you gonna Tell her? 342 00:15:35,768 --> 00:15:37,971 Well, I'm gonna Tell her to take Her stupid job back. 343 00:15:37,971 --> 00:15:39,572 I don't want it anymore. 344 00:15:39,572 --> 00:15:41,508 Wait a minute, sam. Aren't you missing Something here? 345 00:15:41,508 --> 00:15:42,909 What? 346 00:15:42,909 --> 00:15:46,479 You desperately want To jump this woman's Bones, right? 347 00:15:46,479 --> 00:15:47,647 Sure. 348 00:15:47,647 --> 00:15:50,450 And you just arranged Something for her 349 00:15:50,450 --> 00:15:52,885 That she wants more Than anything else In the world. 350 00:15:52,885 --> 00:15:54,654 So? 351 00:15:54,654 --> 00:15:59,259 Don't you see A connection between Those two things? 352 00:15:59,259 --> 00:16:01,328 Breaks your heart, Doesn't it? 353 00:16:03,363 --> 00:16:06,833 You tell rebecca That you love Being the manager, 354 00:16:06,833 --> 00:16:09,469 But you couldn't Stand to see her Being so miserable, 355 00:16:09,469 --> 00:16:11,604 So you got Her her job back. 356 00:16:11,604 --> 00:16:12,872 Next thing you know, 357 00:16:12,872 --> 00:16:15,642 She'll be doing The backstroke On your waterbed. 358 00:16:17,810 --> 00:16:19,446 Carla... 359 00:16:19,446 --> 00:16:21,114 I'm shocked. 360 00:16:21,114 --> 00:16:23,316 Why? That you didn't Think of it first? 361 00:16:23,316 --> 00:16:27,987 Yeah. I mean, I must be losing it. 362 00:16:27,987 --> 00:16:30,557 Woody, uh, Call melville's. 363 00:16:30,557 --> 00:16:33,126 Tell them I want An 8:00 reservation For two. 364 00:16:33,126 --> 00:16:35,195 Tell them that I want Booth number 5, 365 00:16:35,195 --> 00:16:37,430 Chill their best Champagne, 366 00:16:37,430 --> 00:16:40,933 And order a chocolate Souffle for dessert. 367 00:16:40,933 --> 00:16:43,236 Gee, sam, That sounds good, 368 00:16:43,236 --> 00:16:46,739 But actually, I brought my dinner. 369 00:16:48,475 --> 00:16:49,876 Woody... 370 00:16:49,876 --> 00:16:51,544 Make the reservation. 371 00:16:51,544 --> 00:16:53,146 All right, But this is a waste 372 00:16:53,146 --> 00:16:55,482 Of a perfectly good Meatball sandwich. 373 00:16:57,417 --> 00:16:58,751 Thank you. 374 00:17:02,222 --> 00:17:04,023 Sam, I can't Thank you enough 375 00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:06,126 For getting My job back. 376 00:17:06,126 --> 00:17:08,861 I finally feel good About myself again. 377 00:17:08,861 --> 00:17:11,064 You know, The first thing I did when I got home 378 00:17:11,064 --> 00:17:14,000 Was I put in an order For that mercedes. 379 00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:15,835 Ah. I think You'll look great 380 00:17:15,835 --> 00:17:17,904 Wearing one Of those. 381 00:17:17,904 --> 00:17:18,938 So... 382 00:17:18,938 --> 00:17:20,973 You having A good time? 383 00:17:20,973 --> 00:17:22,575 Yeah, I actually am. 384 00:17:22,575 --> 00:17:24,211 Well, you don't have To sound so surprised. 385 00:17:24,211 --> 00:17:26,012 Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it Like that. 386 00:17:26,012 --> 00:17:30,450 It's just that... With all your obnoxious Come-ons and everything, 387 00:17:30,450 --> 00:17:34,621 I never expected you To be as... 388 00:17:34,621 --> 00:17:37,657 As charming As you've been tonight. 389 00:17:37,657 --> 00:17:39,359 No kidding? 390 00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:44,597 So what do you find Charming about me? 391 00:17:44,597 --> 00:17:47,534 Well, for one thing, I find it charming 392 00:17:47,534 --> 00:17:49,869 That you would Try to impress me 393 00:17:49,869 --> 00:17:51,404 By ordering An elegant souffle 394 00:17:51,404 --> 00:17:52,905 When I know Perfectly well 395 00:17:52,905 --> 00:17:57,043 That your Favorite dessert is Frozen snicker bars. 396 00:17:57,043 --> 00:18:01,748 Actually, they're In the bottom of your Champagne bucket there. 397 00:18:01,748 --> 00:18:05,185 Oh. I think I was just charming Again there, wasn't I? 398 00:18:08,121 --> 00:18:10,457 I don't get it. 399 00:18:10,457 --> 00:18:11,924 Just when I thought I had you pegged, 400 00:18:11,924 --> 00:18:15,128 You go out and do Something like You did today. 401 00:18:15,128 --> 00:18:20,433 Sam, that really was The nicest thing that Anyone has ever done for me. 402 00:18:20,433 --> 00:18:25,272 Well, you deserve To have nice things Done for you. 403 00:18:25,272 --> 00:18:27,006 You're a very Nice person. 404 00:18:27,006 --> 00:18:29,409 So are you. 405 00:18:39,652 --> 00:18:41,588 Sam? Yeah? 406 00:18:41,588 --> 00:18:43,656 Is that your hand On my leg? 407 00:18:43,656 --> 00:18:45,325 I'll be darned. 408 00:18:45,325 --> 00:18:49,162 My left hand does Seem to be missing. 409 00:18:49,162 --> 00:18:51,063 Want me to move it? 410 00:18:51,063 --> 00:18:53,200 Yes. 411 00:18:54,100 --> 00:18:57,537 That's not What I meant. 412 00:18:58,938 --> 00:19:00,873 Oh, thank you. 413 00:19:04,076 --> 00:19:06,746 Oh! Mr. Stone! 414 00:19:06,746 --> 00:19:09,081 Hi! What a surprise. 415 00:19:09,081 --> 00:19:10,450 Oh, good evening. 416 00:19:10,450 --> 00:19:13,420 I wonder if we could Have the table Over there. 417 00:19:13,420 --> 00:19:15,788 Mr. Stone, I'm not the hostess. 418 00:19:15,788 --> 00:19:17,924 I'm rebecca howe From downstairs. 419 00:19:17,924 --> 00:19:20,293 Ah, Of course you are. 420 00:19:20,293 --> 00:19:21,661 Miss howe. 421 00:19:21,661 --> 00:19:24,731 I guess I ought To say welcome back. 422 00:19:24,731 --> 00:19:26,899 I was a little Surprised you agreed To the conditions, 423 00:19:26,899 --> 00:19:29,135 But if you can Live with them, So can we. 424 00:19:29,135 --> 00:19:30,370 Ah, here's The maitre d'. 425 00:19:30,370 --> 00:19:32,839 I wonder If I could have That table... 426 00:19:32,839 --> 00:19:34,507 In the other room? 427 00:19:34,507 --> 00:19:36,643 Nice to see you Again. 428 00:19:41,047 --> 00:19:43,049 What was he Talking about? 429 00:19:43,049 --> 00:19:44,651 What conditions? 430 00:19:44,651 --> 00:19:46,786 Want some More champagne? 431 00:19:46,786 --> 00:19:48,755 Sam, what conditions? 432 00:19:48,755 --> 00:19:52,525 Well, they were So insignificant, 433 00:19:52,525 --> 00:19:54,861 They really Slipped my mind. 434 00:19:57,830 --> 00:20:01,368 All right, uh... 435 00:20:01,368 --> 00:20:06,573 You have to take A slight pay cut 436 00:20:06,573 --> 00:20:08,975 And go back to school For your mba, 437 00:20:08,975 --> 00:20:10,710 And share The office with me, 438 00:20:10,710 --> 00:20:12,779 Consult with me On all major decisions, 439 00:20:12,779 --> 00:20:14,881 And since you lack any Practical experience, 440 00:20:14,881 --> 00:20:16,816 You'll Have to wait tables When the bar's busy, 441 00:20:16,816 --> 00:20:19,919 Which would put you Under the immediate Supervision of carla. 442 00:20:22,221 --> 00:20:25,592 Any wonder It slipped my mind? 443 00:20:25,592 --> 00:20:28,961 Sam, uh, when Were you planning On telling me this? 444 00:20:30,763 --> 00:20:32,565 After. 445 00:20:33,866 --> 00:20:35,402 After what? 446 00:20:35,402 --> 00:20:38,405 Afterwards? 447 00:20:41,274 --> 00:20:43,009 I...I'm... 448 00:20:43,009 --> 00:20:44,477 I'm sorry. 449 00:20:44,477 --> 00:20:46,212 I should have Told you, but... 450 00:20:46,212 --> 00:20:49,516 I just thought that You'd been going through Such a tough time, 451 00:20:49,516 --> 00:20:51,217 That you deserved At least one night 452 00:20:51,217 --> 00:20:53,252 Of feeling good About yourself. 453 00:20:54,921 --> 00:20:56,356 I'll call you a cab. 454 00:20:56,356 --> 00:20:58,024 No, no, no. 455 00:20:58,024 --> 00:20:59,492 It's ok. 456 00:20:59,492 --> 00:21:02,529 The important thing Is that I have My job back. 457 00:21:02,529 --> 00:21:04,964 You're not upset About this? 458 00:21:04,964 --> 00:21:06,766 How can I be upset 459 00:21:06,766 --> 00:21:09,736 When I have so much To be thankful for? 460 00:21:09,736 --> 00:21:11,671 Now... 461 00:21:13,306 --> 00:21:15,475 Where were we? 462 00:21:15,475 --> 00:21:17,577 Does this look Familiar? 463 00:21:17,577 --> 00:21:18,378 Huh? 464 00:21:18,378 --> 00:21:19,712 Sam? Yeah. 465 00:21:19,712 --> 00:21:23,850 I want tonight To be very special, 466 00:21:23,850 --> 00:21:29,556 And I think I can figure a way For us to do that. 467 00:21:29,556 --> 00:21:33,726 You see, I have this fantasy... 468 00:21:33,726 --> 00:21:35,995 And it's something that I've always wanted to try, 469 00:21:35,995 --> 00:21:40,700 But I didn't ever think That I'd get to do it Until tonight. 470 00:21:40,700 --> 00:21:42,301 Would you like To know what it is? 471 00:21:42,301 --> 00:21:45,304 Yes, please. 472 00:21:45,304 --> 00:21:48,375 Ok. 473 00:21:48,375 --> 00:21:50,309 Well, you see, I have this Hot tub at home. 474 00:21:50,309 --> 00:21:52,579 I love the way This begins. 475 00:21:52,579 --> 00:21:55,582 And what we do When we get there... 476 00:21:59,352 --> 00:22:01,287 First? 477 00:22:01,287 --> 00:22:02,455 Uh-huh. 478 00:22:02,455 --> 00:22:03,590 And then... 479 00:22:05,792 --> 00:22:07,994 Oh, god. 480 00:22:07,994 --> 00:22:10,062 Oh, please. 481 00:22:10,062 --> 00:22:14,801 A-and this is the part That's just a little Tiny bit illegal... 482 00:22:14,801 --> 00:22:15,935 No, no, no, no. 483 00:22:15,935 --> 00:22:18,070 Oh, I don't think That I should tell you. 484 00:22:18,070 --> 00:22:20,239 I really think It would be better If I showed you. 485 00:22:20,239 --> 00:22:23,042 Come with me now So we don't spoil The mood. 486 00:22:24,777 --> 00:22:28,114 Could you just Give me a minute? 487 00:22:28,114 --> 00:22:30,750 No. 488 00:22:33,453 --> 00:22:35,555 Bye-bye, sam. 489 00:22:43,630 --> 00:22:45,965 Can I get you anything Else, mr. Malone? 490 00:22:45,965 --> 00:22:48,167 No, thank you, paul. 491 00:22:48,167 --> 00:22:49,402 Actually... 492 00:22:49,402 --> 00:22:50,803 Paul... 493 00:22:50,803 --> 00:22:54,474 Could I have another one Of your chocolate souffles? 494 00:22:54,474 --> 00:22:57,009 Are you aware That will take 45 minutes? 495 00:22:57,009 --> 00:23:00,046 Yes, paul, I am. 496 00:23:04,684 --> 00:23:06,419 Woody, 497 00:23:06,419 --> 00:23:08,821 Sam's going to be Upstairs for a while. 498 00:23:08,821 --> 00:23:10,823 When he comes down, Give him this message-- 499 00:23:10,823 --> 00:23:13,059 You tell him that it Will be a cold day in hell 500 00:23:13,059 --> 00:23:14,861 Before I ever share An office with him, 501 00:23:14,861 --> 00:23:18,397 Or schlep drinks In a two-bit saloon. 502 00:23:18,397 --> 00:23:19,899 Uh, miss howe? 503 00:23:19,899 --> 00:23:22,234 Uh, by the way, Midtown mercedes Called and said 504 00:23:22,234 --> 00:23:23,970 You can pick up Your car anytime. 505 00:23:23,970 --> 00:23:26,706 Oh, and they got The one you wanted-- The red one. 506 00:23:30,242 --> 00:23:32,445 The red one? 507 00:23:37,016 --> 00:23:40,620 Hi, there, My name's rebecca... 508 00:23:40,620 --> 00:23:44,724 And it will be My pleasure to serve you. 509 00:23:48,661 --> 00:23:51,864 [theme music playing] 35855

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