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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,445 --> 00:00:04,826 The people who eat here are animals. 2 00:00:04,851 --> 00:00:07,659 And not like those cute otters holding hands. 3 00:00:08,101 --> 00:00:09,538 I hate 'em all. 4 00:00:10,460 --> 00:00:12,367 I went over to check on a table and this man 5 00:00:12,392 --> 00:00:15,326 wiped gloppy short rib sauce on my shirt. 6 00:00:15,351 --> 00:00:16,645 Do I look like a napkin? 7 00:00:16,670 --> 00:00:18,570 Well, you do now. 8 00:00:19,663 --> 00:00:23,593 And by the way, that "gloppy sauce" is a port wine reduction, 9 00:00:23,626 --> 00:00:26,500 and intentionally viscous. 10 00:00:28,664 --> 00:00:29,848 Ugh. 11 00:00:29,943 --> 00:00:32,444 I came out here for fresh air, but that dream is dead. 12 00:00:32,469 --> 00:00:34,815 Let me toss it on the pile with all your others. 13 00:00:35,272 --> 00:00:37,272 I doubt you can throw that high. 14 00:00:37,853 --> 00:00:39,445 It sounds like you need 15 00:00:39,470 --> 00:00:41,754 a delicious and calming cigarette. 16 00:00:41,779 --> 00:00:42,944 I don't smoke. 17 00:00:43,030 --> 00:00:45,781 In the words of the great '80s poet Adam Ant, 18 00:00:45,866 --> 00:00:49,258 "Don't drink, don't smoke, what do you do?" 19 00:00:51,348 --> 00:00:54,466 Hey, dude, I used to smoke, I used to drink, I used to strip, 20 00:00:54,491 --> 00:00:56,408 I used to not come home for days at a time. 21 00:00:56,433 --> 00:00:59,023 Mm, so what you're saying is you used to be fun. 22 00:01:04,660 --> 00:01:05,826 Fine. Give me one. 23 00:01:18,848 --> 00:01:20,851 Oh, right. 24 00:01:23,961 --> 00:01:25,631 Thanks, I owe you one. 25 00:01:25,683 --> 00:01:28,300 Great. You want to come over to my place after we close, 26 00:01:28,325 --> 00:01:30,108 "get chummy"? 27 00:01:30,133 --> 00:01:33,031 It's tobacco, not ecstasy. 28 00:01:33,817 --> 00:01:35,700 Would you like some ecstasy? 29 00:01:52,383 --> 00:01:55,836 -- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -- -- www.addic7ed.com -- 30 00:02:02,414 --> 00:02:04,748 Why do we bother putting the damn chairs away? 31 00:02:04,773 --> 00:02:06,857 We're just gonna have another meeting tomorrow. 32 00:02:06,882 --> 00:02:08,966 There's ladies' Zumba in the morning. 33 00:02:08,991 --> 00:02:10,524 What is that, like a Kegel thing? 34 00:02:10,549 --> 00:02:12,633 Tightening the old hoo-ha? 35 00:02:13,586 --> 00:02:15,736 It's a dance-based exercise class, 36 00:02:15,761 --> 00:02:18,045 but your la-la does get a workout. 37 00:02:18,719 --> 00:02:20,514 Guys, we're all over 12. 38 00:02:20,549 --> 00:02:22,672 We can say "vagina." 39 00:02:23,385 --> 00:02:25,352 I did Zumba drunk once. 40 00:02:25,387 --> 00:02:27,125 Got kicked out. 41 00:02:27,150 --> 00:02:30,312 Maybe 'cause I kept yelling "Zumba!" 42 00:02:31,340 --> 00:02:33,256 And I peed in my leotard. 43 00:02:36,445 --> 00:02:38,484 - Oh, my God. - What? 44 00:02:38,509 --> 00:02:39,792 I just got a text from this guy 45 00:02:39,817 --> 00:02:42,039 I met at The Home Depot yesterday. 46 00:02:42,064 --> 00:02:44,682 Wait, like, "met a guy" met a guy? 47 00:02:44,707 --> 00:02:46,265 You didn't tell me that. Spill. 48 00:02:46,290 --> 00:02:48,400 Well, he works there. I needed to get a light switch, 49 00:02:48,425 --> 00:02:49,791 but I wasn't sure if I needed 50 00:02:49,816 --> 00:02:52,033 a 20-amp or if a 15-amp would cover it. 51 00:02:52,058 --> 00:02:53,257 - So then I... - Get to the man part. 52 00:02:53,282 --> 00:02:56,539 So Rick... that's what his lifting belt said... 53 00:02:56,635 --> 00:02:57,968 Swooped in and said even 54 00:02:57,993 --> 00:02:59,776 if I only needed a 15, a 20 should be fine. 55 00:02:59,801 --> 00:03:01,384 And then he pushed you up against the wall and kissed you. 56 00:03:01,557 --> 00:03:03,679 Sorry, I just got to make the story better. 57 00:03:03,918 --> 00:03:05,953 He asked for my number, I didn't think he'd use it. 58 00:03:05,978 --> 00:03:08,062 Now he wants to know "What's up?" 59 00:03:08,087 --> 00:03:09,859 How do I even respond to that? 60 00:03:09,884 --> 00:03:12,885 How about "Nothing much, what's up with you?" 61 00:03:12,910 --> 00:03:16,216 Are you nuts? You want to sound busy, in demand. 62 00:03:16,241 --> 00:03:17,875 Tell him you're at a gala. 63 00:03:17,900 --> 00:03:20,015 No, wait. You met him at Home Depot. 64 00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:21,923 Tell him you're at a county fair. 65 00:03:22,562 --> 00:03:23,910 Personally, I don't think 66 00:03:23,946 --> 00:03:26,079 you should start a relationship off on a lie. 67 00:03:26,104 --> 00:03:27,436 Go with "not much." 68 00:03:30,594 --> 00:03:33,462 Oh, man, which tiny blonde should I believe? 69 00:03:34,812 --> 00:03:36,937 Well, Christy's my daughter and I love her, 70 00:03:36,970 --> 00:03:39,688 but if you want any hope of a romantic life, listen to Jill. 71 00:03:40,195 --> 00:03:41,461 "At a fair." 72 00:03:41,513 --> 00:03:43,130 Hey, I date. 73 00:03:43,155 --> 00:03:46,320 You do. Not recently, but you do. 74 00:03:48,210 --> 00:03:50,195 Whoa, he texted back already. 75 00:03:50,220 --> 00:03:52,553 And he asked me out on a date! "Anytime... " 76 00:03:52,578 --> 00:03:56,281 No, no, no. You're eating funnel cake at a fair, remember? 77 00:03:56,306 --> 00:03:57,797 Yeah, you're not just staring 78 00:03:57,822 --> 00:03:59,572 at your phone like some kind of Christy. 79 00:04:00,945 --> 00:04:02,109 I don't do that. 80 00:04:02,134 --> 00:04:05,719 I blame myself. It's why I'm trying to do better with Tammy. 81 00:04:06,063 --> 00:04:08,397 - Marjorie, everyone's picking on me. - I know, 82 00:04:08,422 --> 00:04:11,179 and the fact that they're right doesn't justify it. 83 00:04:11,710 --> 00:04:13,008 You know what? 84 00:04:13,033 --> 00:04:15,701 My homework is more fun than this. 85 00:04:15,726 --> 00:04:18,226 And yeah, that's a dig, guys. 86 00:04:18,634 --> 00:04:20,172 It's a dig. 87 00:04:21,277 --> 00:04:24,134 - So when do I text him back? - I'll let you know. 88 00:04:28,510 --> 00:04:29,554 Sharon. 89 00:04:29,579 --> 00:04:30,904 Oh, hey, Christy. 90 00:04:30,937 --> 00:04:32,234 Can I bum one of those? 91 00:04:32,259 --> 00:04:34,470 Sure. I didn't know you were a smoker. 92 00:04:34,495 --> 00:04:36,128 Only on Wednesdays. 93 00:04:36,153 --> 00:04:37,319 It's Thursday. 94 00:04:37,608 --> 00:04:39,219 Just light the cigarette, Sharon. 95 00:04:43,390 --> 00:04:44,812 Thank you. 96 00:04:47,335 --> 00:04:49,945 I'm just gonna go smoke this behind that bush. 97 00:04:54,539 --> 00:04:55,719 I'll see you over there. 98 00:04:55,786 --> 00:04:57,202 Yeah. 99 00:05:03,952 --> 00:05:05,203 Now. 100 00:05:09,376 --> 00:05:10,656 Morons. 101 00:05:15,785 --> 00:05:18,202 Hi, can I have ten dollars on pump three? 102 00:05:18,227 --> 00:05:19,392 You got it. 103 00:05:21,305 --> 00:05:22,281 Actually, 104 00:05:22,306 --> 00:05:24,291 can I have five dollars on pump three 105 00:05:24,316 --> 00:05:25,699 and a pack of the Lights? 106 00:05:25,961 --> 00:05:27,320 Those are nine dollars. 107 00:05:27,345 --> 00:05:29,645 Really? Wow. 108 00:05:32,157 --> 00:05:35,422 Okay, give me one dollar on pump three and a pack of the lights. 109 00:05:49,308 --> 00:05:52,122 I don't like that Tammy's date is picking her up here. 110 00:05:52,214 --> 00:05:55,075 Now if he's a murderer, he knows where she lives. 111 00:05:55,481 --> 00:05:57,264 That's the third time you've mentioned 112 00:05:57,289 --> 00:05:59,318 that she might get killed on this date. 113 00:05:59,343 --> 00:06:02,412 Where is all this murder anxiety coming from? 114 00:06:02,437 --> 00:06:04,411 From being a woman, Marjorie. 115 00:06:05,099 --> 00:06:06,158 Okay! 116 00:06:06,191 --> 00:06:09,341 Get ready. Tammy, come on out, and show them what you got. 117 00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:12,911 Ooh! Wow! 118 00:06:13,407 --> 00:06:16,169 I know, right? I'm a piece. 119 00:06:16,752 --> 00:06:20,287 I'm so nervous, first date out of prison, first date sober. 120 00:06:20,319 --> 00:06:23,183 It's just like going on a date drunk, only much, much scarier. 121 00:06:23,208 --> 00:06:24,591 'Cause you're a woman. 122 00:06:24,626 --> 00:06:26,107 You'll be great. 123 00:06:26,132 --> 00:06:28,401 What if he orders a cocktail and asks me if I want one? 124 00:06:28,426 --> 00:06:29,575 What do I say then? 125 00:06:29,600 --> 00:06:31,275 You don't have to tell your whole story. 126 00:06:31,300 --> 00:06:33,224 Just say you don't feel like drinking tonight. 127 00:06:33,321 --> 00:06:34,857 Or tell him you can't drink 128 00:06:34,897 --> 00:06:36,263 'cause you're taking antibiotics. 129 00:06:36,288 --> 00:06:37,904 How is that gonna work if they keep dating? 130 00:06:37,929 --> 00:06:40,140 Yeah, then he'll think she has some horrible STD 131 00:06:40,165 --> 00:06:42,154 that Western medicine just can't knock out. 132 00:06:43,279 --> 00:06:45,318 But he won't know she's sober. 133 00:06:45,343 --> 00:06:48,256 Maybe you should stop focusing on whether he's gonna like you 134 00:06:48,281 --> 00:06:50,551 and see if you even like him. 135 00:06:50,576 --> 00:06:52,652 You're Tammy frickin' Diffendorf. 136 00:06:52,677 --> 00:06:54,294 You are beautiful and fierce 137 00:06:54,319 --> 00:06:56,412 and he's lucky you're even going out with him. 138 00:06:56,437 --> 00:06:58,404 Wow! 139 00:06:58,827 --> 00:07:02,076 You guys just turned my whole world around. 140 00:07:02,362 --> 00:07:05,607 I am going out on this date with a blown mind. 141 00:07:06,005 --> 00:07:07,639 He's pulling up. lt's happening! 142 00:07:07,680 --> 00:07:10,232 Okay, when he knocks... Out of my way! 143 00:07:17,587 --> 00:07:19,670 Are we still worried about him, Wendy? 144 00:07:25,782 --> 00:07:28,032 Well, well, well. 145 00:07:29,701 --> 00:07:32,118 Look who's here to bum another cigarette. 146 00:07:32,415 --> 00:07:33,497 I have my own. 147 00:07:33,522 --> 00:07:36,306 Ooh, your own pack. That was fast. 148 00:07:36,982 --> 00:07:38,915 I still only smoke once in a while, 149 00:07:38,940 --> 00:07:40,639 I just don't want to be seen as needy. 150 00:07:40,664 --> 00:07:42,580 Mm. I think with that voice and those eyes, 151 00:07:42,605 --> 00:07:44,428 that's always gonna be a problem. 152 00:07:44,900 --> 00:07:46,990 I can take care of myself. 153 00:07:51,142 --> 00:07:52,558 Oh, Christy, 154 00:07:52,706 --> 00:07:53,740 face it. 155 00:07:53,765 --> 00:07:55,098 You're a real smoker, 156 00:07:55,272 --> 00:07:57,845 and a real smoker should have her own lighter. 157 00:07:58,950 --> 00:08:00,333 This was my father's. 158 00:08:02,157 --> 00:08:04,207 And now it's yours. 159 00:08:05,048 --> 00:08:07,931 - Seriously? - No, I got it from a busboy. 160 00:08:09,241 --> 00:08:12,275 Although it was his father's. 161 00:08:14,977 --> 00:08:17,612 What started out as dinner and a movie 162 00:08:17,637 --> 00:08:21,345 ended as dinner and a murder. 163 00:08:22,556 --> 00:08:24,304 I'm getting scared. 164 00:08:24,329 --> 00:08:25,962 Marjorie, change the channel. 165 00:08:27,125 --> 00:08:28,461 Marjorie! 166 00:08:32,439 --> 00:08:33,555 Uh-oh. 167 00:08:34,806 --> 00:08:36,548 Yup, there it is. 168 00:08:37,923 --> 00:08:40,626 What do you know, I am gonna be sad when she goes. 169 00:08:41,390 --> 00:08:42,913 Tammy's back. 170 00:08:43,767 --> 00:08:45,649 Best date ever. 171 00:08:45,674 --> 00:08:48,925 Really? Oh! Marjorie, wake up, she's home. 172 00:08:48,950 --> 00:08:50,533 I'm awake. 173 00:08:51,806 --> 00:08:53,118 Tell us everything. 174 00:08:53,143 --> 00:08:54,809 Well, I'm so lucky you guys dressed me up, 175 00:08:54,834 --> 00:08:57,227 because he took me to Olive Garden. 176 00:08:58,430 --> 00:09:00,743 Okay, I've been watching those commercials for seven years 177 00:09:00,768 --> 00:09:03,795 from prison and if anything, they undersell it. 178 00:09:04,229 --> 00:09:07,018 - What's he like? - Oh, he's funny, he's smart... 179 00:09:07,042 --> 00:09:09,584 - And get this, he doesn't drink. - Is he an alcoholic? 180 00:09:09,609 --> 00:09:12,443 No, he has irritable bowel syndrome. 181 00:09:13,580 --> 00:09:15,306 He sounds perfect. 182 00:09:15,940 --> 00:09:17,523 Doesn't he, Marjorie? 183 00:09:19,302 --> 00:09:22,303 Oh, Lord, let's at least shut her mouth. 184 00:09:29,063 --> 00:09:31,146 Tape? Anybody got any tape? 185 00:09:32,242 --> 00:09:34,118 Was there a good-night kiss? 186 00:09:34,143 --> 00:09:35,660 A lady doesn't kiss and tell, 187 00:09:35,685 --> 00:09:38,026 but I'm no lady, so let me tell you about the kissing. 188 00:09:38,221 --> 00:09:39,447 It was awesome! 189 00:09:39,472 --> 00:09:41,639 You know the kind of kiss that leaves you light-headed? 190 00:09:41,691 --> 00:09:43,401 No. 191 00:09:44,244 --> 00:09:46,588 Look at you... you went on a date, you stayed sober, 192 00:09:46,613 --> 00:09:48,657 your clothes aren't inside out. 193 00:09:48,682 --> 00:09:50,041 You didn't bring any of their breadsticks home 194 00:09:50,066 --> 00:09:52,617 for your friend Bonnie, but otherwise, a success. 195 00:09:52,652 --> 00:09:53,534 That's what you think. 196 00:09:53,559 --> 00:09:56,654 - What a night! - I know! 197 00:09:57,049 --> 00:09:59,100 So when can I text him to tell him I had fun? 198 00:09:59,125 --> 00:10:02,251 - Never. Wait for him to text you. - But I want to. 199 00:10:02,276 --> 00:10:04,197 Go ahead. A little "I had a good time" won't hurt. 200 00:10:04,226 --> 00:10:06,641 They're still warm. 201 00:10:06,666 --> 00:10:08,892 Thanks, Bonnie. "Had a nice time. 202 00:10:08,917 --> 00:10:10,500 Can't wait to see you again." 203 00:10:10,553 --> 00:10:11,669 I guess that's okay. 204 00:10:11,721 --> 00:10:12,837 "I think you're the one." 205 00:10:12,889 --> 00:10:14,138 No! No! No! 206 00:10:16,021 --> 00:10:18,729 Oh. How'd it go? 207 00:10:33,255 --> 00:10:34,541 Hi, Jill. 208 00:10:35,357 --> 00:10:39,111 I'm almost there, driving as fast as I can. 209 00:10:39,952 --> 00:10:41,368 Bye. 210 00:11:32,281 --> 00:11:33,875 That was easy. 211 00:11:36,258 --> 00:11:38,587 I'm starving. Can we please order? 212 00:11:38,612 --> 00:11:39,911 Aren't we gonna wait for Christy? 213 00:11:39,936 --> 00:11:42,047 No, 'cause I get rude when I'm hangry. 214 00:11:42,072 --> 00:11:43,622 We're ready, we're ready! 215 00:11:43,647 --> 00:11:46,570 Oh, I am so gonna get her fired. 216 00:11:46,595 --> 00:11:48,870 Why isn't Rick texting me back? 217 00:11:48,895 --> 00:11:50,011 I'm gonna text him again. 218 00:11:50,036 --> 00:11:51,180 Tammy, I wouldn't. 219 00:11:51,205 --> 00:11:53,672 You texted him four times in the car on the way over here. 220 00:11:53,697 --> 00:11:55,030 How do I put this gently? 221 00:11:55,189 --> 00:11:56,772 That's something Christy would do. 222 00:11:56,858 --> 00:11:58,224 I just really like him, 223 00:11:58,276 --> 00:12:00,059 and I haven't liked anyone in a long time. 224 00:12:00,144 --> 00:12:02,361 Which is great, but just take it slow. 225 00:12:02,397 --> 00:12:04,184 Food! 226 00:12:04,981 --> 00:12:07,064 I think I have some almonds in my purse. 227 00:12:08,895 --> 00:12:09,785 No. 228 00:12:11,364 --> 00:12:13,359 Maybe my phone is broken. Will you just text me? 229 00:12:13,384 --> 00:12:15,184 No, you're obsessed with this guy. 230 00:12:15,209 --> 00:12:17,209 "This guy"? His name is Rick something 231 00:12:17,245 --> 00:12:19,412 and he means a lot to me. 232 00:12:19,497 --> 00:12:22,081 Hi, guys. Sorry I'm late. 233 00:12:22,106 --> 00:12:25,561 Traffic. What is happening to Napa? 234 00:12:25,586 --> 00:12:27,219 Have you been smoking? 235 00:12:27,735 --> 00:12:29,115 Why would you ask me that? 236 00:12:29,140 --> 00:12:31,223 Because you smell like mouth wash, air freshener, 237 00:12:31,248 --> 00:12:33,381 Purell and dryer sheets. 238 00:12:33,489 --> 00:12:35,655 It's like sitting next to a freshly cleaned motel room. 239 00:12:36,544 --> 00:12:39,098 I'm not smoking. Did we order yet? 240 00:12:39,243 --> 00:12:41,494 No, 'cause this is hell. 241 00:12:42,899 --> 00:12:45,665 - Why do you have a lighter? - Why are you going through my purse? 242 00:12:45,690 --> 00:12:47,801 - I'm your mother. - What does that have to do with it? 243 00:12:47,826 --> 00:12:50,262 You came out of my pocketbook, I get to rifle through yours. 244 00:12:53,754 --> 00:12:57,583 Okay, yes, I'm smoking, 245 00:12:57,679 --> 00:12:59,846 but I'm not drinking, I'm not gambling, 246 00:12:59,871 --> 00:13:01,407 I'm not sleeping with married men. 247 00:13:01,432 --> 00:13:02,565 Let me have this. 248 00:13:02,590 --> 00:13:04,673 It's him! 249 00:13:05,004 --> 00:13:07,103 Shoot, Amber Alert. 250 00:13:07,340 --> 00:13:10,763 White pickup, Utah plates. Keep your eyes open. 251 00:13:11,122 --> 00:13:13,503 Tammy, stop with the phone. You're driving yourself crazy. 252 00:13:13,528 --> 00:13:16,362 You're driving us all crazy. You're acting pathetic. 253 00:13:18,939 --> 00:13:22,637 Not him, but, yes, Wendy, Bonnie was a little harsh. 254 00:13:25,426 --> 00:13:28,374 Not out loud. You trying to get me killed? 255 00:13:31,454 --> 00:13:34,419 Hi, I'd like to make an order for delivery. 256 00:13:34,444 --> 00:13:37,479 Yeah, my address is the booth with the woman waving. 257 00:13:52,089 --> 00:13:53,472 Yeah? 258 00:13:54,497 --> 00:13:56,976 Hey, Bonnie, what's happening? 259 00:13:57,706 --> 00:13:59,520 What is happening? 260 00:14:01,315 --> 00:14:04,065 You gals talking about Zumba 261 00:14:04,090 --> 00:14:07,019 inspired me to get out my old Jazzercise tapes. 262 00:14:07,131 --> 00:14:10,504 There's a lot to mock here, but I need your advice. 263 00:14:11,543 --> 00:14:13,739 This thing with Tammy is driving me... 264 00:14:14,453 --> 00:14:16,450 Okay, we need to lose this. 265 00:14:17,590 --> 00:14:18,891 I just don't know what to do. 266 00:14:18,916 --> 00:14:21,166 She's gonna get her heart broken and I'm worried about her. 267 00:14:21,202 --> 00:14:23,202 What? 268 00:14:23,692 --> 00:14:25,431 I'm taking a moment to enjoy 269 00:14:25,456 --> 00:14:28,173 that you're worrying about somebody other than yourself. 270 00:14:29,487 --> 00:14:30,686 You've really changed. 271 00:14:30,711 --> 00:14:32,567 Oh. Thank you. 272 00:14:33,442 --> 00:14:36,520 You can have this back. It's actually kind of wet. 273 00:14:37,747 --> 00:14:39,278 Okay, here's the deal, 274 00:14:39,303 --> 00:14:40,640 I know what's best for Tammy. 275 00:14:40,665 --> 00:14:42,448 How do I get her to listen to me? 276 00:14:42,473 --> 00:14:44,857 You don't know what's best for her, Bonnie. 277 00:14:44,953 --> 00:14:46,953 She has to have her own experiences. 278 00:14:46,978 --> 00:14:50,623 The only thing you can do is share yours, if she asks. 279 00:14:50,648 --> 00:14:52,690 - But she's not asking. - Well, then shut up. 280 00:14:52,715 --> 00:14:54,106 You shut up. 281 00:14:55,247 --> 00:14:57,213 Sorry, you were saying? 282 00:14:57,598 --> 00:14:59,698 You know, when you started dating Adam, 283 00:14:59,783 --> 00:15:01,651 I thought you were making a big mistake. 284 00:15:01,676 --> 00:15:02,935 What's wrong with Adam? 285 00:15:03,270 --> 00:15:05,244 Well, I just didn't like him, 286 00:15:05,296 --> 00:15:06,912 and I didn't think you were ready, 287 00:15:06,991 --> 00:15:08,774 but you proved me wrong because you are 288 00:15:08,799 --> 00:15:11,253 handling this relationship so beautifully. 289 00:15:11,278 --> 00:15:15,314 Thank you. What exactly didn't you like about him? 290 00:15:15,575 --> 00:15:19,391 Well, he had a certain swagger I didn't appreciate, 291 00:15:19,762 --> 00:15:22,761 and apparently, before you, he was a bit of a tomcat. 292 00:15:22,813 --> 00:15:27,266 "Swagger"? That's a great way to put it. So arrogant. 293 00:15:27,318 --> 00:15:29,435 My point is, I was wrong. 294 00:15:29,487 --> 00:15:30,653 I'm not sure you were. 295 00:15:30,738 --> 00:15:32,917 We're running into ex-girlfriends all the time. 296 00:15:32,942 --> 00:15:34,250 - Bonnie, listen... - Williams-Sonoma, 297 00:15:34,275 --> 00:15:36,979 I am buying nice plates for the first time in my life, 298 00:15:37,004 --> 00:15:38,220 and who's wrapping them up? 299 00:15:38,245 --> 00:15:40,613 Jaqueline with her big, fake fingernails. 300 00:15:41,843 --> 00:15:43,643 Why didn't you tell me this back then? 301 00:15:43,668 --> 00:15:46,020 You didn't ask for my opinion, 302 00:15:46,739 --> 00:15:48,898 like Tammy hasn't asked for yours. 303 00:15:48,923 --> 00:15:51,090 Fine, fine, got it. 304 00:15:51,115 --> 00:15:54,917 Okay. Now if you don't mind, 305 00:15:54,942 --> 00:15:56,972 I would like to go back to Jazzercise. 306 00:15:56,997 --> 00:15:58,574 Would you like to join me? 307 00:15:58,599 --> 00:16:02,294 I would not, but I definitely want to watch. 308 00:16:15,278 --> 00:16:16,620 Hi. 309 00:16:16,645 --> 00:16:18,751 - Hi. - You okay? 310 00:16:18,776 --> 00:16:22,194 Uh, yeah, I just pulled a muscle Jazzercising. 311 00:16:23,778 --> 00:16:25,958 By the way, your ass appears to be on fire. 312 00:16:27,661 --> 00:16:30,496 Fine, caught me. Cue the lecture. 313 00:16:30,559 --> 00:16:31,641 No lecture. 314 00:16:31,666 --> 00:16:32,831 Oh, come on, you don't think 315 00:16:32,856 --> 00:16:34,243 this is self-destructive behavior? 316 00:16:34,268 --> 00:16:35,668 Oh, honey, 317 00:16:35,720 --> 00:16:38,671 I get it. I went through the whole 318 00:16:38,696 --> 00:16:41,813 "finding ways to be naughty in sobriety" thing. 319 00:16:42,518 --> 00:16:45,454 In fact, when I had about five years, 320 00:16:45,479 --> 00:16:48,180 I developed a massive crush on Marvin, 321 00:16:48,205 --> 00:16:50,587 the guy that I had the coffee commitment with. 322 00:16:50,612 --> 00:16:51,661 Ooh. 323 00:16:51,686 --> 00:16:55,320 No, not "ooh." He was married and so was I. 324 00:16:55,356 --> 00:16:57,690 - Ooh. - Yeah. 325 00:16:57,715 --> 00:17:00,196 All we did was flirt, but... 326 00:17:00,221 --> 00:17:02,254 it did give me a thrill, 327 00:17:02,279 --> 00:17:04,663 and at the time, I really needed that. 328 00:17:04,759 --> 00:17:06,308 So what happened? 329 00:17:06,333 --> 00:17:08,667 Oh, I kept working the program, and so did he, 330 00:17:08,703 --> 00:17:12,504 and we got better and the flirting stopped. 331 00:17:12,540 --> 00:17:16,044 Also, one night he wore a denim vest. 332 00:17:18,129 --> 00:17:20,656 Well, my Marvin and I are still flirting. 333 00:17:20,681 --> 00:17:24,747 Okay. I'll see you inside. 334 00:17:30,122 --> 00:17:32,106 What was I trying to prove? 335 00:17:40,151 --> 00:17:42,911 Hi, Bonnie. 336 00:17:42,936 --> 00:17:45,122 Hi, Tammy. 337 00:17:46,153 --> 00:17:49,185 I'm calling 'cause I owe you an apology. 338 00:17:49,271 --> 00:17:51,030 I was too hard on you. 339 00:17:51,055 --> 00:17:52,304 You're not pathetic 340 00:17:52,329 --> 00:17:55,297 and I was wrong to say you were obsessing about Rick. 341 00:17:56,044 --> 00:17:59,167 Thanks, Big Sauce, that means a lot. You're forgiven. 342 00:17:59,192 --> 00:18:01,707 Good. So what are you up to? 343 00:18:01,732 --> 00:18:04,066 I'm sitting across the street from Rick's house. 344 00:18:06,970 --> 00:18:08,136 Are you? 345 00:18:08,161 --> 00:18:10,239 And I may have binoculars. 346 00:18:11,724 --> 00:18:15,302 - Uh-huh. - Am I as crazy as I feel? 347 00:18:15,342 --> 00:18:18,200 - Are you asking my opinion? - I am. 348 00:18:20,139 --> 00:18:22,472 Where are you exactly? 349 00:18:26,649 --> 00:18:29,116 You took an Uber to stalk a guy? 350 00:18:29,152 --> 00:18:30,818 You know I don't drive. 351 00:18:30,870 --> 00:18:33,871 - Bonnie, Yuri. Yuri, Bonnie. - Good evening. 352 00:18:33,896 --> 00:18:36,017 Uh, would you like to have mint, water, phone charger? 353 00:18:36,042 --> 00:18:37,158 I'm fine. 354 00:18:37,243 --> 00:18:40,377 Why are you doing this? Eh, as long as I'm here. 355 00:18:40,463 --> 00:18:41,750 I still hadn't heard from Rick, 356 00:18:41,775 --> 00:18:43,558 so I went to Home Depot to say hi, 357 00:18:43,583 --> 00:18:45,833 and he walks away and says he has to do something 358 00:18:45,885 --> 00:18:47,885 in aisle three, so I follow him to aisle three 359 00:18:47,910 --> 00:18:49,910 and he's not doing anything. So I say to him, 360 00:18:50,006 --> 00:18:51,222 "You're not doing anything," 361 00:18:51,400 --> 00:18:52,950 and he says, "I can't talk right now. 362 00:18:52,975 --> 00:18:55,009 I'll call you later when I get home." 363 00:18:55,034 --> 00:18:58,520 Six hours go by, no call, so I came to see if he's home. 364 00:18:58,545 --> 00:19:00,200 He's home! 365 00:19:00,542 --> 00:19:03,465 He can clearly be seen eating pizza in his boxers. 366 00:19:03,930 --> 00:19:05,513 So what do I do? 367 00:19:05,840 --> 00:19:08,022 In my experience, 368 00:19:08,074 --> 00:19:11,192 if a guy would rather eat alone in his underwear, 369 00:19:11,244 --> 00:19:13,027 he's not interested. 370 00:19:13,112 --> 00:19:15,496 - I know. - You do? 371 00:19:15,538 --> 00:19:18,604 I just didn't want to admit it to myself. 372 00:19:18,864 --> 00:19:22,180 Tissues are in pocket in front of you. 373 00:19:22,205 --> 00:19:24,672 I'm gonna be single the rest of my life. 374 00:19:24,707 --> 00:19:27,875 No, you're not. I have done way worse than this. 375 00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:29,543 Sitting outside his house? 376 00:19:29,568 --> 00:19:30,855 Try moving into his attic 377 00:19:30,880 --> 00:19:32,280 without him knowing for three weeks. 378 00:19:32,408 --> 00:19:34,325 You didn't really do that. 379 00:19:34,350 --> 00:19:36,884 Sure did. There was a website warning people about me. 380 00:19:38,604 --> 00:19:40,187 But now I'm getting married, 381 00:19:40,223 --> 00:19:42,223 and I'm not as crazy as I used to be, 382 00:19:42,248 --> 00:19:44,748 and I found a guy who loves the crazy that's still there. 383 00:19:44,773 --> 00:19:46,504 You're gonna learn from this, and next time, 384 00:19:46,529 --> 00:19:47,695 you'll do it differently. 385 00:19:47,730 --> 00:19:49,730 If there ever is a next time. 386 00:19:49,755 --> 00:19:52,473 It may not happen right away, but it will happen. 387 00:19:55,732 --> 00:19:57,431 I think you've waited long enough. 388 00:19:57,456 --> 00:19:59,911 May I take you for dinner sometime? 389 00:20:00,946 --> 00:20:05,114 I'd love that. Let's go now! Bonnie, out! 390 00:20:05,416 --> 00:20:08,417 - Hey, can we go to Olive Garden? - No problem. 391 00:20:19,302 --> 00:20:21,919 You don't do anything halfway, do you? 392 00:20:21,944 --> 00:20:24,528 Are you gonna smoke with me or just judge? 393 00:20:24,553 --> 00:20:27,318 - No, thanks, I quit. - How? 394 00:20:27,343 --> 00:20:30,317 I just stopped. It's called having character. 395 00:20:30,604 --> 00:20:32,353 Have fun out here. 396 00:20:32,378 --> 00:20:34,247 I will! 397 00:20:43,036 --> 00:20:44,567 Oh... 398 00:20:44,765 --> 00:20:46,348 Oh, come on! 399 00:20:47,812 --> 00:20:52,215 -- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -- -- www.addic7ed.com -- 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net 29231

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