Original subtitles

Hello.

Mr. Blake, please.

Blake?

I don't think there's mister ...there's Tony?

Here.

Mr. Blake, we booked in 103.

Who?

I've got to go.

It's about six.

No way.

No more than four.

Jesus Christ, don't bother me with this kind of crap,

okay.

No bye-byes?

No, no bye-byes.

Can I call you sometime?

Any time.

What's your name?

Felicity.

Back to your boyfriend, Felicity darling.

What's his name, what's his name?

The stud

He's the stud,

stud

What's his game,

what's his game?

Stud

Stud

Hello my pretty.

And I have to start, boy, who plays the brake down.

But I'm moving, even if I have to push it.

But I nearly started to write that ticket for you.

Oh, just try and see if it works.

It works.

He is the stud...

Stud...

What's his game, what's his game?

Stud...

Oh Charlie. And I'd tell you wildly.

Come on, come on, let's have it.

The little punters are on their way.

A very good set.

This is it.

Mr. Blake is very early.

What's the time again?

That little guy, what's his name?

Lukeno.

Yeah, give him a jacket tonight, all right?

Okay.

Mr. Blake, this came for you yesterday.

Hey Claus, how is it going?

Top of the tree, man.

I'm going to whoop their ass tonight.

Mr. Blake, there's a phone call for you, Mrs. Khaled.

Yes, Mrs. Khaled?

You're never late are you, lover.

The car is waiting for you.

So am I.

Put your coat on.

I don't want you catching a cold.

Franco, reservations.

Yeah.

Miss Carla Casini, she is coming tonight?

You put the wolves on a second to best table last night,

my baby.

Never mind the backhanders you put them back in oblivion

where they belong, all right?

Yes, Mr. Blake.

Yes, who is it?

Your mother, Mr. Blake.

All right, put her through. Franco,

you've got Mike Rovani on the bad side there explain that to me.

Yes, you put them in with the silk shirt

and the colors around

it may dye it pink a bit, my handkerchiefs are a bit red.

Mr. Blake, he bounced three checks last week.

He's not exactly a good costumer.

Look, you know who his old man is?

If he likes a client, a couple of checks,

you let him, all right?

So put him on the good side, all right?

Well Tony, all right.

Yes mom.

Christmas, what about it?

All right.

I'll try and make it.

I'll let you know.

All right.

Ta-ta.

Franco. Si.

I've just got to pop out for an hour.

Keep the mafia more busy, will you?

Don't drop it, will you, lover?

It's 5th Century.

You're wondering how much it was worth,

weren't you?

It's not hard to imagine what your thinking,

most of the time.

Well, I was thinking about the weather now and again,

and I think about you and what you're thinking.

Let's go and discuss the weather then.

What's going on?

It's an emergency.

What's that?

That's your cue.

That's enough.

Oh, that's enough, Tony.

That's enough darling.

Come on.

Where's your husband then?

In Geneva.

What's he doing there?

Meeting his daughter.

Well I'm supposed to be working in his club.

It's my club and I can take a loss for an hour.

You're supposed to be looking at me.

That's right.

Was nice.

Let's go,

let's go

Let's go,

let's go

Let's go,

let's go disco Let's go disco,

let's go disco Let's go disco

everybody getting down

And having a good time you all

Will get to the funky south

Well, well, well. Well

And make it with the right you all

The night is still young

Let the DJ play your favorite song He-hey,

let's go disco, let's go disco

Let's go disco, let's go disco

Let's go,

let's go disco Let's go disco,

let's go disco Let's go disco,

move your body To the beat

See that foxy lady go

Sure no tire to use that feet

Drive them people crazy ya'll Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

The night is still young

People dancing till the morning comes

Let's go disco, let's go disco

Let's go disco, let's go disco

Let's go, disco time

Let's go,

let's go

Let's go,

let's go

The night is still young

People dancing till the morning comes

Let's go disco, let's go disco

Let's go disco, let's go disco

The night is still young

Let the DJ play your favorite song

Let's go disco, let's go disco Let's go,

let's go disco Let's go disco, let's go

Let's go disco Let's go disco, let's go

Easy go I did love the cars

I build my love

I missed you darling.

Tony, So nice to see you, darling.

How are you?

I want you meet a friend of mine? Carl...

Tony.

Nice to meet you.

Take care. Okay.

Blake,

Mrs. Weinstein. That's all right.

Franco, please tell Mr. Blake Lord Newton is here.

Tony, it's a privilege to see you.

I haven't got a reservation but one doesn't go in the

afternoon but one's going to go in the evening.

Molly darling, you look like a dynamite.

I take it your unescorted.

What? No, no... I've got two charming twins with me,

Nigel and Jeremy.

I suppose you know the rules single gentlemen pull

the ladies in.

How are you?

Fine, fine.

Got a table for me and the lad?

Absolutely.

Franco, table for Mr. Flynne.

Thanks, Tony.

Single gentlemen pull the ladies,

it makes the other gentlemen uptight.

Well, I never pulled a lady in my life.

That's a bloody silly rule.

I don't make the rules.

Oh, nice to see you surely.

You can always make an exception for a very

special pal, don't you?

Look, everyone here is special.

Well, what if I should jolly well decide to

cancel my membership then?

Well if that's how you feel.

No, no, no, no it's only a joke, Tony.

Anytime, let me know.

Yes.

You'll know where we are going when you're not so busy.

We'll go somewhere else.

Come along child, we'll go down the road.

You love it, don't you?

Well, I deal perks with like that.

I used to run my ass up for them and they leave me for

money for a tip.

Waiter never forgets, eh.

How are you going?

Uh sneaking by.

Hello darling.

Good morning?

Hello, sweetheart.

Hi darling.

Hello sweetheart.

Jesus, you'd be sneaking by the child offenses act

if they get me... How are you doing?

Where did you find them?

There's nothing to it.

I just follow the school bus, ran in a roll and wait till

they climb in, and they do.

You rob the cradle, Hal robs the graveyard,

what a pair.

You don't have to twist their arm these days,

you know?

Can't hop down on the old foggy before he complains.

I'll blame the lad on the moral standards on the TV

and so do you?

Well, I'll blame it on gray head women like you.

They ask for comics, not a bag of sweet and you give them a

penthouse to have on my trade.

You're only young once, you know.

That's what their dad's keep tellin them.

Franco, get Mr. Marc's a scotch and a milk shake for

his daughter.

I left my wallet in my other suit, right?

Boy, doesn't matter honey. A buddy of mine runs the club.

Hey Tony, meet Maxine. She runs Springs.

Oh, this is a nice place.

She is loaded.

What?

Nothing.

Listen I want to talk about the menu, right?

Now she's... oh yeah, hail to the chick.

Good evening, Mrs. Khaled.

Ah, Good evening, Franco.

Umm that's good.

Darling, you look fantastic.

You look divine.

We must have lunch someday. Yes, darling. Call me.

He's good, there's nothing else that I would rather be

The greatest pleasures teach us soon

He's in the top with you

Mrs. Khaled. Do I smell mouthwash?

Just a little.

I didn't want to spoil the flavor.

Why?

You reek of sex anyway, it's your main attribute.

You're too kind.

Yes.

It's my main failing.

Franco, the music is much too loud.

Of course.

Tony.

Vanessa, darling. Hello sweetheart,

you look terrific. You look terrific.

Tony.

This is Marc.

How'd you do Marc?

Welcome to the club.

Thank you.

Is Jeremy here?

Later.

Why don't you come through?

Life is very light.

Merry Christmas and... we do our best.

How are you?

Hey, Leonard.

How are you? Okay.

How was LA?

Sinking slowly into the sea as far as I could tell,

too slowly.

That's Maxine behind me.

Thank you my darling.

Have you heard from Benjamin, darling?

Yes, he called me from Switzerland twice.

How's the novel coming on?

Page by page.

I see you brought your bit of crimpy jail bait with you then dear.

Well, Denise... nah she's an old age pensioner,

well preserved like her highness.

Oh bitchy.

You better mind your tongue dear she might bite it off.

Lucky her.

What did he say?

Faggot.

And how's little... Alexandra?

Alexandra.

Is Alexandra liking Switzerland?

Well how the hell should I know?

She's his little brat, not mine.

Go stay with somebody your own age.

Because I saved him from...

You're a nice old geezer, but you don't own me honey.

But then I judge other writers by what they write...

myself, by my best intention.

What, the first Mrs. Khaled?

Is she in London then?

No darling.

She's in Bark.

She is breeding pit ponies

and I understand they all look exactly like her.

Oh beastly.

I think she's got a stud there too.

This is a dance floor not a geriatric pool.

All right.

That's enough, leave it out.

Hey, where the hell are you taking him?

Please sit down.

Franco, get me and my lady champagne.

She's dry from yelling.

Yes.

I'm right in.

Okay.

You can't leave him alone for a moment, can you?

That's my job.

Well, come do a job with me.

I never could believe the things you do to me

Never could believe the way you are

Who is that?

That?

That's Molly.

Molly?

What a divine name.

Everyone's a winner, baby, that's the truth

Making love to you is such a thrill

Everyone's a winner, baby, that's no lie

You never fail

Amazing creature.

Is she part of your job too?

Look at her.

Never could explain just what was happening to me

Just one touch of you and I'm in flames

Doesn't that give you a hard on?

My, my, my... I do believe the boy is embarrassed.

Your very friendly this evening madam.

Everyone's a winner, baby, that's the truth

Was my good enough for the lip?

Oh yes, it's about the one place you are good enough, Tony?

Just bear that in mind, won't you lover.

I'm leaving now tiger.

I'll call you tomorrow.

Oh and Tony turn the music down.

It's much too loud.

Franco, get her bag.

Fontaine.

Oh dear.

How are you?

Well looking good was it.

Be good... I will.

Again my paperwork, and a word in your shell like ear.

What is it?

You fucking rock stars are all the same.

No we're not.

We just look alike, that's all.

Hey mate.

Anyway, I'm just an old fashioned crooner.

You'll want to lay off that stuff,

one of these days it's going to kill you.

Whoever heard of a seventy year old rock star anyway?

You should try some, seventy year old greeters aren't much

in demand either.

You know what I mean?

Out of the mouth of babes and rock stars.

Well, that's really what I wanted to talk to you about.

I'd like to open a new club.

What wrong with this one? Nothing.

Except it's neither yours nor mine.

Well that's two and two, what's four?

You could put up the necessary Dinero and I can find a

location, clientele, catering, design, the lot.

This lot would pack it out in Wimbledon if my name were over

the door, you know that.

Don't know if I like of the sound of Wimbledon too much, Tony.

I'll tell you what?

Give me a couple of days to think it over.

No promises but I'll think about it.

Then we'll talk.

Sounds good.

It could give me some of the figures on this place

in the meantime.

Yeah, sure.

Moonlighting

They're leaving everything

Moonlighting

They're losing all their friends

Moonlighting

It's the only way It's frightening

But it means they'll stay

Together They're gonna make it together

I'm not in love,

so don't forget it

It's just a silly phase I'm going through

And just because

Sam... Nico. Right.

I call you up Don't get me wrong

Don't think you've got it made

Where you from honey?

Center Page, of Playboy honey.

Oh, can't see any staple marks.

Oh don't you know, they touch us up afterwards.

That's the kind of job I like.

Looks like you've got it.

Not so hard Sandro.

Sorry madam but there's so much tension.

I take Valium for tension Sandro,

not punishment.

Why do you keep him?

Who?

Tony.

Darling, he's my masterpiece.

I own him.

I have turned a common waiter into one of the most fancied

young men in London, more or less with my bare hands.

I totally redid him, clothes, hair,

even sex, especially sex.

Do you know when I first met him,

Tony thought that 69 was a bottle of scotch?

You're priceless.

Well, frightfully expensive though.

Then when do I have him?

Whenever you wish my darling, unless it's not during club hours.

But wouldn't you be jealous?

Good God, it would be like being jealous of a turnstile

at Regent's Park zoo.

I might even arrange it for you.

Oh I've got something to show you,

I think you'll be fascinated.

Will I?

Do I hurt you madam?

I realized Sandro that this is not your intention,

but you're getting me excited.

It's all right Sandro, just bring me the phone.

Hello.

Good morning lover.

Oh, it's you.

Are you up?

Yeah I'm awake but...

What do you mean 'but?

You're an early riser, aren't you?

Good, then I'll have all of it then,

I'm coming over.

Coming over, coming over where?

Oh, I don't really mind wherever... wherever,

besides I miss you.

I've been lying here thinking about you,

and I'm ready, I'll be around in 10 minutes.

God.

Hey, you do this for a living huh?

Oh shut up.

Oh, well, I got one for free from a real professional.

Do I have to fill in a form or something,

for your income tax?

Cut it out.

No, I mean if it's any easier I don't mind paying.

Do you take Access?

Several times last night, didn't I?

Okay, suppose we put the little extras down to Diners

Club then.

It's not often I get the chance to eat that much,

who does this one charge it to.

Come on, it's not like that.

Sure I know?

You good looking tarts are all the same.

Well, don't let me keep you from your work.

I won't be long Sanders.

Very good, ma'am.

I've got 15 minutes Tony.

I'm late for the hair dressers.

Christ, I'm not a machine you know.

In the meantime lover, you will do.

What are you wearing tonight?

Oh I don't know, anything.

Oh Fontaine you're positively wicked,

you know that?

Yes, I am, aren't I?

I knew I should have gone into the movies,

instead of wasting my best years modeling,

they wanted me too.

How on earth did you manage that?

I can take a loss for an hour.

Practice darling, endless practice a bit like ballet

lessons.

What's he doing?

He's looking at his watch...

cocky little bastard.

Oh this isn't fair.

When are you going to arrange him for me?

Yeah.

Maybe I'll give him to you for Christmas.

You know I'm in Paris.

Oh yes I know.

Oh I love Paris.

Oh, ah.

Oh shit.

You look like shit.

Yeah, I've had a busy day.

Still going across the boss' wife.

You're playing a mugs game, Tony.

She's got you both ways.

You can't even blow the whistle,

right?

Anytime I want, I can go.

What happens then?

All of sudden you're an ex-manager of a night club.

She probably won't even let you keep a jacket.

Might fit the next guy.

You got to use your head first and your cock second.

Basic law of physics, that is.

Christ.

Creeps up on you, doesn't it?

What?

Age, darling, the invisible enemy.

Don't be silly, you look incredible.

Hmm, I'm my own work of art.

Maybe if I could've had kids, I'd be all nice and mummsy by

now.

I didn't know you couldn't have kids.

Rather unfortunate abortion, took care of that.

'Don't want them' sounds much better than 'can't have them'.

Anyway at least I'm not risking thrombosis from the

pill.

You always said you hated kids.

Anyway, Leonard thinks you're the most beautiful woman he's

ever seen.

Does he now?

You must remind me to thank him properly.

Oh darling, you must bring Tony to Paris,

then we can all have him.

All?

Maybe you should take up the banjo,

Tony baby.

Always good to have a second trade.

Nah... he's going to be a tap dancer when the old trouser

snake lets him down, ain't you tone.

Listen, you two toe rags.

In the not too distant future, I'm going to make the pair of

you look like twin arseholes.

I've done the waiter bit, I've done the manager a bit.

The next one is going to have my name on it,

Tony's very own.

I've got a certain person to put his limbs up and I'm going

to be making bread.

I'll blow the whistle on the performing bit when I feel

like it right now I don't feel like it.

I enjoy it, right?

End of story.

What's Glen like in bed?

Well, inventive.

Inventive?

Hmm.

I always thought he was a trifle gay.

I must say invention isn't one of Tony's strong suits.

With him it's more of a matter of... enthusiasm and staying

hard.

You know, I think Paris is a fantastic idea.

We could do some Christmas shopping.

I need a new coat.

What would you do about Ben?

Oh Ben... he'll be far too busy fawning over his daughter to

worry about what I am doing.

He'll probably be grateful to me for getting out his way.

Very considerate of you, darling.

Do you mind if I watch it again?

Now I know what I'm getting for Christmas.

Be my guest.

About Fontaine Khaled, she's using you.

Listen, Fontaine Khaled is a beautiful,

intelligent woman.

She's a ball breaker.

She gave me a chance.

She wanted you to screw.

Eh, you're unhappy because I pull beautiful ladies and you

have to pay for your cufflinks by dicking over old age

pensions.

Don't tell me I'm schmuck.

It's only my hobby.

What are you doing in your spare time,

make model airplanes?

All right, Warren Beatty, you stick to your hobby.

You can nail it to the wall when it doesn't work anymore.

That is unless someone nails it for you.

Well, it won't be you.

You're too busy wheeling bath chairs round now.

Let me tell you something about those old dragons.

Their husbands are usually dead.

How's Mr. Khaled?

So, which bright young things do we have the pleasure of

this evening?

Mario's is with Gordon and Alex is with Peter,

of course.

Christ.

Another one of those upper class itentikits.

Peter's a very nice boy.

Alex likes him.

She always has done.

I think they are very well suited.

Maybe they can all live happily ever after then.

Is that so wrong?

It's all so boring.

He is boring.

She's boring.

They all bore the arse of me.

I hope you won't be using language like that in front of

her.

It's that puritanical attitude of yours that makes me talk

like that around her.

You know she can't bare me to be more attractive than her

own mother.

So you'll make it up to her by treating me like a servant

whenever she's around.

Do I really treat you like a servant?

Well, no.

No, not really.

But she doesn't like me and you know I just can't help the

way that makes me behave.

She won't be here for long.

But she is my daughter and I can't refuse her to stay in my

house.

Must you absolutely be here until the New Years,

darling?

Yes, I'm afraid so, why?

Oh, Vanessa and Leonard have asked us to Paris for

Christmas.

It would have been divine if we could have gone.

Why don't you go?

Oh, it wouldn't be the same without you after all it is

Christmas.

Don't be silly.

Do some shopping, have a marvelous time,

you'll be back by Christmas Eve.

Well, I shall have to bring you something very,

very special then.

You get too much You get too much And I know I'll get you

back And gentleman in England...

Where is Mr. Blake?

He's in the store.

Go and get him.

We're not here in this piss hole for you boring farts and

hold their manhood, see while any speak of those who fart

and fight upon the same Christians.

Oh Tony, get your bum chums off and get Bowsy a

drinkington.

Thank God for Harry, England and Tony Blake.

Ladies and gentlemen...

Mr. Tony...

Take it easy Bowsy, please.

Hey Tony... why don't you and I drop our trousers and see

whose got the biggest willy in the room,

eh?

Come on, off we go.

You disappoint me, Blake.

I thought you had more style.

He used to kiss my arse when he was a waiter.

You're nothing but a working class bum in Gucci shoes.

Listen Franco, I don't want to see his fat little face again.

Yeah, maybe it's best that...

If he wants to shoot his mouth of,

he can go do it in the House of Lords not in my club.

Right.

Don't let the ruling classes ruffle your feathers,

right.

Ah, Fontaine.

Good evening, Tony.

We are going out for a party so we shan't be here very

long, but let me introduce you.

Hello.

And his sister, Madeline, Gordon Brown,

and this is my daughter Alexandra.

This is Tony Blake who runs the club.

Alex is a bit young for night clubs but I don't think she'll

come to any harm here, do you?

Of course not.

Which one is Alex?

She is the one in the fairy frock,

talking to Tony.

Who is that man being thrown out?

Oh, that was one of our titled customers.

We get all the Lords and Ladies and layabouts down

here.

Do you?

I don't seem to recognize anybody.

Well, they often look different in real life.

Is this real life?

Peter was just telling us about an expedition

he went on to.

Where was it Peter?

They Hindu Kush, actually.

I think the younger generation is very adventurous these

days.

We took the train from Bombay.

Of course they are still using steam trains.

Do I get enamored with a noble lord,

Shakespeare in flights, Henry five,

one of the better moments.

I hate to hear one of his worst moments.

You saw Mt Everest too, didn't you?

I suppose it would be hard to miss.

Well, it certainly is quite a sight.

You can see the main peak for about 200 miles.

Goodness knows how anyone's brave enough to climb the top.

I think they're all stoned out of their minds before they

start.

I think it's terrific.

I see it closing in the morning before breakfast.

She's awful.

She was always giving me those funny looks during P.E.

She was probably a raving dyke,

and I'm sure you'd be very attracted to

that sort of person.

Shall we go and dance, Gordon?

Well, actually I don't dance very well,

I'm afraid.

Well go and dance, so that they don't have to sit here

and watch you pick your teeth.

Is that alright?

Yes of course, go on enjoy yourself.

Come on Gordon.

Well, what do you think of the club?

Why did you make fun of him like that?

Tony, beware of the cock in the tail.

God, Jesus.

Who is the princess then?

Oh hold on, Benjamin Khaled's daughter,

now would you believe that.

Don't know if you believe it yourself.

Now Alex darling however Fontaine behaves to you

whatever she does... she can never...

Excuse me.

Have you seen, Madeline?

I've seemed to have lost her in the crush.

Why don't you sit down.

She can never affect our relationship you know that?

Daddy, I know that, but she's so impossible and so rude to

my friends.

It's part of growing up.

How is the family outing getting along?

Huh, wonderful.

Little Miss Muffet and Winnie the Pooh are making googoo

eyes at each other.

The other moron is taking his horrific girlfriend for

dancing lessons and I'm behaving like a bitch.

When Ben gives me his Arab glares even Tony seems to have

turned to stone this evening.

Have you said anything to Ben about Paris?

That's the one thing that's kept me from screaming in his

face.

And he said yes?

He said yes.

I'm flying over with you tomorrow.

Marvelous.

What did you tell him?

Oh, he thinks he's doing it for Alexandra.

So that I'm not around to criticize the yodeling and she

can't bore me to death with her sixth form brain.

And what about my Tony?

Your Tony... hmm.

Well, I think that we should keep Tony in the dark until we

share him up.

You know, he's only used to having one woman at a time.

We wouldn't want to frighten him off,

would we?

I love the TV special.

Has anyone else taped him?

No.

I think I'm the only one who starred opposite him.

And you haven't got Ben as well?

God forbid.

Ben gets his cock sucked once a month,

always in the dark and never ever in the lift.

When he drop you off And he said to you girl oh...

So this is Tony, eh?

Nice to meet you, Tony.

Nice to meet you.

Well, I'm just happy about it.

Oh thank you very much.

Mr. Blake.

How is it going my dear?

There's too many people in the restaurant.

Have you seen my wife?

No, I didn't.

She's always fucking on somebody.

Hello Tony.

Hello over here.

There she's...

Ah, Vanessa, I should like to go home now.

No, we'll go and dance.

"Don't be such a drag.

You're going to dance.

Oh go and dance.

Come on, I'll practice here.

Making me rooms and why don't you allow that These brand new

ones Out in the shadow searching for someone For

someone To set you free From New York City...

Hi, Tony.

You're running the club very good.

Is everything all right?

It's just be... it's just that we have had another engagement

I can't keep them waiting too long of course.

Ah superman.

What have you done with your little girlfriend?

Well, I've sort of lost her actually.

Oh and I'm sure you'll find her when they sweep up in the

morning.

I'll take out with some service, all right.

I'm going to Paris.

Oh thank you.

"Can I catch a lift, sir?

I think I should be getting along as well.

Would be delighted to, yes.

Your car's waiting, sir

Hello stranger you are an angel To the love I knew

Hello darling.

Hello.

You want to dance?

Oh, no really I couldn't.

Of course you could.

No really.

How old are you?

I'm 16.

Awful, isn't it?

Hmm, that's lovely.

You're a virgin?

Well, fortunately you're talking to a man who

specializes in such diseases. Oh.

Sorry, I'm a lady Sorry, I'm a lady I would rather be

Rather be Just a little shady

Just a little shady Naughty dynamite

Who is he?

Oh, he wants me to dance I think.

Bloody boots, forget about dancing,

probably walking too.

I should have worn my flats.

I'm so fed up with looking like a cute little dumpling.

I want to be groove bit.

Can we go soon?

Yes, I suppose so.

Alex...

Franco, now she's gone.

Turn the music up for me.

Yes, sure.

Well...

Well...

Funny place, wasn't it?

What was funny?

Well, you know the...

Oh, all those old men and young girls.

Sure.

Funny really.

Peter.

Hmm.

Kiss me.

Yes, of course.

What's the matter?

Nothing, nothing.

Crikey.

What's wrong?

It's just that I don't want Maddy to come out and find us

in the throws of fore play before we're even engaged.

Oh my God.

The door.

Yes of course.

What are you doing?

Oh it's you.

What is that?

And you're supposed to be looking after...

I was going to tell right away,

really I was.

But you weren't here.

What you're doing?

I heard it all in the loo and then we left with Peter,

but I couldn't tell you in front of him,

could I?

Heard what?

They were talking, she and that rinsed out blond friend

of hers.

They're going to Paris with him for an orgy.

But I don't think he knows it yet.

I don't know if Daddy would know.

Never let them get away with it.

He doesn't know.

They said so.

She said he thinks she's going to Paris to get out of your

way really it's to...

what you're doing?

It looks like he's pretty good at it.

"Which is more than your brother can say.

Oh Alex you're not going to ...not with him.

Fontaine would hate it, wouldn't she?

She said she doesn't care who he does it with.

She says that's what he is for.

We'll have to take her word for it,

wouldn't we?

Lying in my bed on the 40th floor suddenly crunched

in through the window.

He flies covered in blood and glass and I just can't believe

what's happening.

I mean it's just the most ridiculous thing.

Is Miss Khaled upstairs.

She wants to speak to you.

Who?

Daughter of Mr. Khaled.

Is she... alone?

Yeah.

Champagne.

Hello.

Hi.

I hope I haven't dragged you away from anybody.

My pleasure.

What can I do for you?

Well you could let me in if you would.

Well, in the club.

Yes.

It is not against the rules?

I make the rules.

Welcome back.

Thank you.

You do like it here.

Yes I did.

Am I allowed to sit here?

I wouldn't want to upset your hierarchy.

I don't think you would upset anything.

Oh I might.

Take it from me you're the least upsetting person I've

met in my life.

I suppose that is a compliment.

It is.

You are actually old enough to drink, huh?

Everything is quite legal.

Don't worry.

Well, where do we begin?

What do you suggest?

Like to dance.

No.

Eat?

No.

Well then, what would you like to do?

Perhaps you could take me home.

What now, you just got here.

Well, if that's what you want.

Almost...

What's the rush?

You don't turn into a pumpkin, do you?

Not if you take me to your house,

otherwise I might.

Mind these steps I don't think they've been cleaned for

months.

Bloody cleaner, I don't know why the door is open.

All right.

Damn.

Someone must have cut the lights off.

I'm only ever here in the day.

Be careful.

I'll make some coffee.

What?

Electric kettle.

Never mind.

Do you want to go to bed?

Well, just like that?

We reach the stars Beyond the star,

almost To Jupiter, yes To Venus and mars,

yeah, almost I've won and lost me a bet or two Making each

lover routine Now do I have a regret or two,

almost Almost

Hey, sugar, it's almost morning.

Do you think Fontaine is attractive?

Put it this way, if I had two choices you'd be both of them.

It's going to be Christmas soon,

what are you doing?

I'm seeing mommy this weekend, I'll probably stay there.

Are you?

Where's that?

A cottage in the country.

Would you like to come with me?

Mm-hmm.

How's that?

I tell you how that is, I think I love you.

I hope you would.

Will you call me later?

What, in Paris?

What are you thinking?

Dye your eyes green, it might suit you and I tell you what,

dye your hair green and change your shirt.

What are you so bleeding cheerful about?

Its life man, its life.

Oh knickers.

The lady goes away for a couple of days you're

ecstatic.

If she comes back you're bleeding suicidal again.

I can handle it.

Anyway this one is different.

What's different about it?

Hey, mind the pins will you.

It's like fucking acupuncture.

Which side do you dress sir?

On the right, I'm a south pole.

Thank you.

It's not like that with this one Sammy.

If I didn't know you better I'd say cupid was up your

arse, Antonio.

I'd say love was rearing it's ugly head,

my son, which for a bright young lad your position is a

bleeding disaster.

Bullshit.

Yeah, but delightfully served.

What's wrong with me being in love with her anyway?

It does happen.

Not with you and then diamond studded hippos,

I know, but it does happen.

Personally, I'm tired of putting it in everything that

winks at me.

I don't care if I'm in love with her.

I want to be in love with her.

Wrong.

What you think, then?

Jacket looks fine, you, you look fucked.

Yeah, I was last night.

Top it all, she nicked 15 quid of me while I was still

kipping.

You can't trust them, can you?

I've been telling you that for years.

Look at me and learn, babes.

Yeah, look at you.

The tie matches your eyes.

That Khaled had been coming a little bit

stronger last night with you?

Mind your own business.

What are you doing now mother daughter act?

What are you talking about?

You haven't forgotten

who your boss is, have you?

Fontaine.

What she got to do with it?

Oh, nothing sweetheart.

She's only the wife of this fair damsel's father,

who you're screwing twice a week.

You are going to need a pair of dark glasses and a white

stick pretty soon.

If you really want a broad?

How about Mamie?

At least she could bank roll you, right?

Yeah, another Fontaine deal, only this one's old and ugly.

"Hark at these two, rent a pricks.

Thanks for the offer Hal, I've got other avenues.

You got dead ends baby, dead ends.

New York girl, ooh, ooh, ooh Runnin pretty,

New York City girl Twenty-five,

thirty-five Hello, baby, New York City girl You grew up

ridin' the subways, running with people Up in Harlem,

down on Broadway You're no tramp,

But you're no lady, talkin' that street talk You're the

heart and soul of New York City And love,

love is just a passing word It's the thought you had in a

taxi cab that got left on the curb When he dropped you off

and he stated firm Oh, oh, oh (oh,

oh, oh) You're a native New Yorker You should know the

score by now You're a native New

Yorker New York girl, ooh, ooh,

ooh Music plays, everyone's dancin' closer and closer

Makin' friends and findin' lovers There you are lost in

the shadows, searchin' for someone (Searchin' for

someone) To set you free from New York City And,

whoa, where did all those yesterdays go When you still

believed love could really be like a Broadway show You are

the star, win the applause Oh, oh,

oh You're a native New Yorker No one opens

the door For a native New Yorker

You're confirmed on the 10 o'clock flight to Orly.

You'll be met, something about opening a club in Paris.

Oh shit.

A bit early isn't it?

How're you keeping?

Well, very well.

Listen, I'm getting those figures for you tomorrow.

Figures?

Oh, yeah.

It should be most revealing.

So... make it a gold mine this place.

Well, we'll call our place the gold mine,

shall we?

All in good time sweetheart, all in good time.

I can start looking for premises before Christmas.

All I need is your okay and we'll start emptying this

place into our own pockets.

That's a very good idea Tony, very good idea.

Well, when?

"Soon as I've had a piss, partner.

Listen, I'm serious.

Yeah, it's a very serious business.

Give me a call over Christmas.

We'll sort something out, okay?

Okay.

Tell me, where does Fontaine Khaled come into all this?

Nowhere, it's just you and me.

Oh, it's a shame, lovely lady, right?

Paris?

Yeah, well what else could I say?

I'd be basking in Shit Street for the New Year if I had say

no, wouldn't I?

If it had been the New Year, I would've totally get run out,

wouldn't I?

Why?

Santa Claus bringing you a new job,

is he?

Well, don't screw his reindeer when he does,

will you?

One of them might turn out to be your boss.

Listen, you 40 year old teenager,

I got Thane backing me in a new club in a couple of weeks'

time and then I can tell her it can run out.

Give this to Thane and let Franco have the books back,

all right.

Yeah, sure.

You comfy back there.

It'll do.

Here, take a couple of these.

Keep your eyeballs open even if your brain falls out.

What are they?

Uppers, you know, keep you on top of it all.

Paris.

Welcome to Paris, Cheri.

Bon Jour.

So, what have you been doing?

Anyone I should know about?

Look, are you serious about opening a club here?

Of course not.

That was just an excuse to get you here.

Well, I don't like being summoned like piece of

luggage.

Oh.

It's a nice coat.

Is it new?

This?

No.

I've had it for hours.

Jeez.

Oh lover you're so predictable,

never late and always shocked.

Look, I'm really tired from the trip.

But I bought this especially for you.

Anyway, you don't get jet lagged flying from London.

This will wake you up.

Oh lover we're going to have a divine time.

This is going to be a night to remember.

Now you just relax and I will do all of the work.

I will show you the French way.

This house is the only brilliant thing that Leonard

ever created.

He keeps on babbling on about all those scripts that he

sends to Hollywood and they all end up on the reject

shelf.

Amazing.

And he does it all with Vanessa's money too.

Look at the parrot.

Hello.

Bon Jour.

Come on lover, they're waiting for us.

Well darling, here he is and in excellent working order.

Tony, welcome to the feast.

Hello Leonard.

Come and sit down.

Vanessa.

This is Kamara and this is Pierre.

How you do?

Kamara makes a fortune painting by numbers and Pierre

helps them spend it.

Well, that's one way of making a living.

What a remarkable young man.

Where did you find him, Fontaine?

Inside a waiter's jacket and trousers simply bursting to

explode.

So, I let him out.

Such an oral strength and the eyes.

Put him down Kamara, he's not yours.

No, you don't know where I've been either.

I could, hazard a guess.

Then do if hazard is the key to him.

I wouldn't say hazard was the key,

Tony no.

Perhaps you could tell us who he is.

Who needs a key?

I picked the lock.

And I, and to do this I'd use either sex or money.

But suppose there are locks.

God Leonard not philosophy, please.

You'll turn the evening into a fucking bore.

Well, I like the things Leonard says.

Thank you, Tony.

That makes you his favorite listener,

after himself.

Oh, you English.

You use your smiles as seals and your words are swords.

Oh, how profound.

Don't you wish you'd said that Leonard?

I will.

Well, I think I'll go and take a look around and leave you to

solve your crossword puzzle.

Now don't go straying too far, will you lover?

I shall go with him, to be sure that he doesn't darling.

Good.

Come Tony, let me show you the palace of the light.

Don't worry about Kamara, it's just another of Vanessa's

parasites, here, drown your displeasure.

That's a very good idea.

Thank you.

I often wonder what it is the winters buy.

One half so precious as the goods they sell.

Drugs, could it be?

Well, you're not doing too badly as a writer.

I wish I learned to spell a bit better.

This is not good spelling.

This is a truce of a cunning marriage.

I needed someone to support me in my craft and seminar.

Vanessa needed someone to support.

In some ways I'm more of a tax loss than a husband.

You're not complaining though, are you?

Come and see my little paddling pool.

But mind the deep end.

Who are they Leonard?

I don't know but... they are nearly always here.

Women bore me Tony.

Do they?

Much as I appreciate an additional orifice,

they bore me.

Hey Tony, Tony hold on, let's go for a swim.

Not just now, what about the others?

Oh don't worry about them they'll be long in a moment,

here.

I thought they'd never leave.

Where do you find them, Vanessa?

Here...

So when do I get it all together?

All we have to do is to press, button number one.

And which button would that be?

Well, darling all of Tony's zones are erogenous.

You can choose anyone of them and they are all good.

Vanessa, get here...

Come on Jess.

Coming.

Tony, I have got a surprise for you.

Get in there.

He's wrapping up.

You're my Christmas present.

Don't you want to see what's inside it?

Come on, come on, no come on.

I'm going to have you.

Oh Leonard, where you've been all my life?

Take me, love it.

Ready?

Do it.

Tony, Tony, Tony don't go.

Tony, come on back.

What's going on?

It's an emergency.

Stop it.

Your cue.

That's enough darling.

Where's your husband then?

He's in Geneva.

What's he doing there?

He's meeting his daughter.

I'm supposed to be working in his club.

It's my club.

"I can take a loss for an hour and you're supposed to be

looking after me.

Ricardo residence.

Ricardo, wake him if you have to.

It is in the middle of the night, Sir.

Benjamin Khaled here.

Well Mr. Khaled, I'm sorry Mr. Ricardo is not here,

he won't be back until...

I want him in my office tomorrow morning at 9 o'clock.

9 o'clock.

Bon Jour.

Oh my God, what a dump.

Did I wake you?

Yeah.

Wasn't last night fun?

All that fun, you can keep it.

Nobody had a gun to your head my pet.

You know what I mean.

I don't like being put in that position.

And which position was that?

You were in so many.

I'm talking about those nutters you call friends.

I hope you're not reverting to type,

Tony.

I thought I've trained all of that working class taboo out

of you.

Well, you haven't.

So it appears.

Vanessa was disappointed in your performance too or rather

than the lack of it, especially after the rave

reviews I gave you.

You mean you already had that lot worked out between.

You cow, don't you ever do that to me again,

ever.

I wouldn't dream of it.

As a matter of fact, I think it's time that I started

looking for something a bit more up market.

All right, all right so I'm dismissed,

how do I get back home?

Fuck yourself there darling.

You could do with a little practice.

Holy shit.

Ah, you must be Tony.

Yes, Mrs. Khaled, right?

Ah yes.

But do come along.

Alex said you'd be arriving but I'm afraid she's out for

the moment.

Nice little place you got here.

Yes, well, we like it.

Now, Staton will show you to a room and then,

perhaps you'd like a drink.

Fine, yeah, fine.

Who's that?

Tony Blake.

Your gin and tonic madam.

Thank you.

Scotch and soda sir.

Oh yeah, thank you.

Quite up here...

Would you like a drink sir?

Yeah, whiskey and coke please.

Coke sir?

Yes, cola.

That's a strange drink young man.

With the whiskey sir?

Yes, I know its awful shame to waste perfectly good

Coca-Cola.

Yes, quite certain.

Well, as I was saying, I'm just down the road next to

Mrs. Haley Scott.

Do you know her?

No, don't know her.

Yes, well, her husband died about three years ago.

They used to keep race horses.

Comme un cheval.

Thanks darling.

Oh well.

Very nice, did you make them yourself,

don't you?

Sit there.

Next to you.

Thank to you.

That's right.

What are you doing here?

No, not here.

Okay, we'll just talk.

Not now.

What's going on Alex?

Going on?

I can't get near you.

Really, I...

Look, I came here for you and not this country bullshit,

you understand.

Christ, Alex, I'm sorry.

I just never felt like this about a chick before and

that's all.

A chick?

Get out of my room.

Get back in your nasty little car and take your stupid words

back where you belong.

Go on, get out.

For Christ Alex, what did I do?

What did you do?

You think I don't know about you and that cheap slut who

owns you.

You think you can break my father's heart between the

rotten pair of you and expect me to love you on a one night

stand?

Listen Alex, Fontaine, she's nothing to me.

Go and tell her then.

Go and tell the bitch.

Tell her I sent you back again as a Christmas present.

You're just about what she deserves.

A cheap gigolo in a little night club,

a visit when she feels like it.

Go on, get out.

Get back to your chicks and your stupid friends.

You're pathetic.

Did you think I'd fall for the irresistible Tony like the

rest of them?

Is that what you thought?

Is it?

Come on.

I'm home.

Where's everybody?

Who are you?

Where's my husband?

Who the hell are you?

My name is Rupert Scott, Mrs. Khaled.

I work for your husband in a legal capacity.

He asked me to give you this.

Your husband has instructed me to inform you that he's taking

divorce proceedings against you at the earliest possible

opportunity in the New Year.

Also that your clothes and effects have been removed from

this property and placed for your convenience in a suite at

the Connel hotel all reasonable care was taken.

Further that as from midnight tonight,

this property reverts to the holding company and all the

keys and locks will therefore be changed.

A notice has also been promulgated to the effect that

your husband is no longer responsible for any debts

incurred by you in his name.

My God.

Is there anything you'd, you'd wish to ask me,

Mrs. Khaled?

You, no.

Very well then.

I'll bid you goodnight.

Oh, by the way Merry Christmas,

Mrs. Khaled.

Mr. Thane is not in at the moment.

If you wish to leave a message please speak after the tone.

Merry Christmas here my lad.

Its Tony Blake here, sorry I couldn't get you before

Christmas but you know how it is.

Give us a call will you, you got the numbers.

Don't forget about our little deal.

Hark the herald angels sing Glory to the newborn King

Peace on earth and mercy mild God and sinners reconciled

Hello.

Yes?

It's, its Tony Blake here, Mrs. Khaled?

Yes, it's I.

Yes, we did meet briefly.

That's right.

I was wondering if I could speak to Alexandra,

please.

Well, I'm afraid she's out at the moment,

Tony.

Can I get her to ring you?

Yes please.

Does she know your number.

Yes.

Well, goodbye then.

Bye-bye and Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas.

What was that?

Oh, it is nothing important.

Friends, this is one of the happiest moments

of my life.

I propose a toast to my daughter, Alex.

2p, love.

Goodbye darling.

Mr. Thane is not in.

Sammy Marks.

Hello, Sammy, it's Tony.

How are you?

I heard you were dead and doing the club circuit up

north is that true?

No, that's an ugly rumor.

I'm alive and well, living in South America.

Pick the right time of year for it,

didn't you?

What are you doing down here?

Well, Christmas with my mom and dad,

who may or may not be alive, you can't tell till you switch

the box off, then you hear them snoring.

Well, I was supposed to be tucked up with Alex but...

I don't know.

Not that mother and daughter act.

No way.

I had enough with that lunatic woman in Paris.

Did she have enough of you?

Yeah, her and her mate.

I got to get out of that one Sammy and I thought if I could

just talk to Alex.

You are thick my old fruit ain't you.

I mean, I love you but you are thick.

Thanks.

Listen my son, there's two sorts of ladies in this world.

The first sort will pick you up and screw you,

second sort will pick your brains and screw you up.

Your Alex belongs to the latter half as far as you're

concerned.

You're not from the same planet you two,

I mean, she might fancy you or she might not.

When it comes to any kind of permanent fixture,

you've got all your assets and eligibility of a piece of very

rough trade.

I'm not hurting your feelings, am I?

I don't believe you, Sammy.

All right, so my name is not hopely stopley and I didn't

make head boy at Gordonstoun but I can still handle myself

can't I, but if I couldn't that club wouldn't be nothing

without me for a start and it's not going to end there

either, not by a long way.

They're going to be eating off of my tables for very shortly,

you'll see.

Oh yeah, yes.

Yes, if Thane came through.

Yeah, firm?

The contract has been drawn.

Oh, not firm.

A verbal agreement worth exactly the paper it's

written on.

Listen Tony, with a schmuck like Thane,

you don't believe till the money is in the bank and then

checked by experts to make sure the Queen's picture ain't

winking at you.

Thane is the serpent in the garden,

my son.

I'm not worried.

Yeah, that's what I like about you.

Come on, let me buy you a drink for the New Year,

you're going to need it.

You don't often meet a winner who loses like you.

Let's go disco Let's go disco

Having fun, Tony?

Don't know whether you know but Alex and I are engaged,

getting married in the spring probably.

Don't you think it is a good idea,

but we thought we'd hold our engagement party here?

Yes, I know it's a bit of a delicate subject,

see you later old chap.

Excuse me, excuse me.

Have you seen Madeline?

Are you all right?

Here, where you been all my life?

I tell you what, play your cards right,

you could have me tonight.

Ooh amazing lips, amazing.

Let's go disco Let's go disco

The night is still young Let the DJ play

your song Let's go disco

Tony, give us a kiss.

Tony, you're looking very well.

You know Ian of course.

We've met.

Perhaps next time you'll be a little wiser.

As a matter of fact, you saved me some problems.

Ben wants to sell and Ian has offered to buy his share.

Since you're going to go into business for yourself,

all I need to do is to find a new manager for this place and

don't be here tomorrow will you, Tony?

There's a good boy.

Is life beautiful man.

Ain't it beautiful?

Five minutes everybody.

Hello Charlie, how are you?

You bastard, you cock sucking bastard.

You and that whore stab me in the fucking back with your

bloody night club punks.

Well, I'll tell you what, I'm fucking finished with you and

this bloody dump...

You are a filthy runt.

Here we go.

Get him out of here.

Come on you.

Get up.

Tony.

Tony.

Come here.

Give us a call champ,

anytime.

Nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three

Mr. Blake, Mr. Blake.

Two, one, Happy New Year.