All language subtitles for New.Tricks.S03E04.Diamond.Geezers.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-squalor_Track03

[Piano music]

[Footsteps]

Another funeral.

Once a fortnight now.

Coming round like
bloody Christmas.

[Dog barks]

Victor Hadley. Mean
anything to you?

Must be someone
I knew in the job.

Wasn't there a dci at
kilburn called Hadley?

No, that's hedley.

Well, might as well go.

Networking for the older man.

Nobody close was it?

Okay.

Bonjour.

All right, we'll see you
tomorrow then. Bye.

Jack won't be in today.

He's got to go to a funeral.

Nobody we'd know, apparently.

Oh, they can be
funny things, funerals.

Hardly.

Hey, you got any plans, Brian?

Oh, please.

Esther and me were walking along

the south down way one time.

We came across
the natural burial site.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

There's no cemeteries
or headstones.

They just dig you in
by the side of the road

and you become a
mulch for the bluebells.

Sorry, can we talk
about something else?

No, you have to be
prepared, Sandra.

[Chuckles] We do, anyway.

Have you got anything
planned, Gerry?

Yeah, burn up.

I've got this vision of a
crematorium besieged

by grieving women all
wearing black stockings.

What about music?

Nah. Haven't thought about it.

You've got to get it sorted.

I know what I want.

Oh, yeah? A rave from the grave?

Yeah, a rocker from the locker.

Guys, we've really got to
look at these clear up stats.

Hold on. Listen to this first.

["Light my fire" by the doors]

Know what that is?

Is it Rolf Harris?

Rolf Harris! No!

Think of cremation.

♪ You know that I
would be untrue ♪

♪ you know that I
would be a liar. ♪

[Laughing]

- Sir.
- ♪ if I were to say to you ♪

♪ girl, we couldn't
get much higher ♪

♪ Come on, baby,
light my fire. ♪

♪ Try to set on
the night on fire! ♪

♪ Time for hesitation ♪

♪ it's all right. It's okay. ♪

♪ Doesn't really matter
if you're old and grey. ♪

♪ It's all right. I
say, it's okay. ♪

♪ Listen to what I say ♪

♪ it's all right. Doing fine. ♪

♪ Doesn't really matter
if the sun don't shine. ♪

♪ It's all right, I
say, it's okay. ♪

♪ We're getting to
the end of the day. ♪

[Birds chirping]

[Bell chimes]

[Birds continue chirping]

Sorry I'm late.

[Organ plays]

[Organ plays "my
way" by frank Sinatra]

Filth.

[Scratching]

My beloved father,
Victor Hadley,

passed away peacefully
at our family home

in Spain in his 83rd year.

He was one of a
special breed of people

known as the great generation.

[Crowd chatter]

But, in 1974,

dad was exiled

from the land of his birth

by the inland revenue
and the metropolitan police.

[Mourners murmur agreement]

We're here today for dad.

Jewel among men,

a diamond geezer.

[Mourners murmur agreement]

[Vicar] May he rest in peace.

- Amen.
- [Crowd] Amen.

[Birds chirping]

Derek wants a word with you.

Derek Hadley.

Look, I think there's been
some sort of a mistake.

There has and you made it.

So what do you want to do?

Make a scene, or
show a bit of respect?

[Tense music]

[Car engine]

[Derek] What's your game?

I don't know what
you're talking about.

You blagged your way
into my family's day of grief.

I was invited.

Were you arseholes?

Why would we want the
filth at my dad's funeral?

It's not even embossed!
What do you think we are?

It's been knocked
off on some copier.

Someone shoved it through
my letterbox last night.

I didn't know it wasn't kosher.

I thought it from
was someone I knew.

Bollocks. You came
here to wind us up.

You were well out of order.

Stop the car, I've
had enough of this.

Tough titty. Alfie.

[Dramatic music]

Do you like funerals?

You keep your
snout in my business,

you'll find yourself
at another one.

Look at him, poor old plonker.

You should see yourself.

I'm told you're not
even the filth any more.

You're just some sad old
bastard running errands.

[Car engine running]

[Breathes heavily]

[Dramatic music]

Gerry?

[Continues breathing heavily]

I need a bit of help.

Jesus!

Jack, you all right, mate?

Cheers, Gerry.

I'm sorry to drag you out.

Nah, that's all...

Cor blimey, you look
terrible! What happened?

Just give me a
lift home, will you?

- Yeah.
- I'll tell you in the car.

[Doorbell rings]

[Bag rustles]

Hello, Brian.

Jack all right?

Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks
for coming round so late.

It's all right.

Esther said to
bring some grapes.

Oh, that's very kind of her.

Yeah, well, it's the
thought that counts.

Sandra doesn't know anything
about all this, does she?

No, she'd already
left for the day.

Good. I'm not sure how
official I want to make all this.

Now, Derek Hadley.

Chopper Hadley.

As far as we can remember,

he was a big-time
drugs dealer in the '90s.

But he was never
convicted of a serious crime.

Drugs raids were
always blow-outs,

witnesses were too
scared to come forward.

He turned millions
in criminal earnings

into lucrative
property investments.

Left the UK to live
in Spain in 1997,

reputedly carried an axe

and used it - frequently.

Another drink, Jack?
[Knocks on table]

Oh, yeah, sure.

So what's Hadley
actually doing here?

Well, according to
criminal intelligence,

apart from burying his father,

Hadley's here to dispose

of some of his
investment properties.

Looks like he's burning
his boats in england.

He must be in a bit of a hurry

because he's booked a
return flight for next week.

Still an active criminal.

Definitely.

Which will account for him
not wanting me on his back.

Yeah, but not for why you
were conned into going...

No.

Well, shortly after he
went to live in Spain in '97,

he was suspected of
being involved in a murder.

Yes, I know. Micky
springer, small-time villain.

Never enough evidence
to prosecute Hadley,

and I was one of the last
people to see him alive.

[Brooding music]

[Car beeps]

[Tense music]

In 1997, an informant of
mine called Micky springer

called to see me, saying
that his life was in danger.

He owed a lot of
money to a serious villain

and he offered to
grass up this villain

in exchange for protection.

I asked for a name

but he wanted too many
assurances before he would give it.

Well, Micky
springer disappeared,

and, about a week
later, a man's body

in black plastic bin liners
was found in the river Lea.

The heads and hands
had been removed,

presumably to
delay identification.

But it was eventually identified

as that of Micky springer.

Were you involved in
the murder investigation?

No, by this time,

I had retired for the
job to look after Mary.

So what conclusion was reached?

None, really,
except that springer

was a known associate
of one Derek Hadley.

Chopper Hadley.

The same.

Now, Hadley had left the
UK to join his father in Spain

about the same time
springer disappeared.

He was very much in
the frame for the killing,

but there was never
enough evidence

to warrant his extradition.

The removal of
springer's head and hands.

Was that done with
an axe, by any chance?

No, no, it was a chainsaw job

and it was done after
springer was dead,

and the pathologist was unable

to determine the cause of death.

Did springer have any family?

Not as far as we know, no.

Wife, girlfriends?

Nobody came forward.

Why do you want to bring this

to the top of the pile, Jack?

Because Hadley's back
in the UK for a brief period

to some settle family
and business affairs.

There'll never be a
better chance to nail him.

Okay. I'll square
it with strickland.

Thank you.

There's some background
material on him.

Thank you.

So, the case files need
reviewing and we need

to track down what Hadley's
doing in the UK right now,

who his current associates
are, where he's staying...

Surveillance. I'll
have some of that.

Well, you know me. I'm
always up for a bit of leg work.

[Up tempo music]

[Camera shutter clicks]

[Mouse clicks]

Of course, a lot of this
surveillance material

was taken under
very difficult conditions

and, you know, just
using available light

but with digital images and
the sophisticated software,

you'll be amazed at the
quality that can be recovered.

What's your white spot
setting and your rgb balance?

Default, right?

He's getting there.
Give him a chance.

I didn't know you were
such a digital whiz, Gerry!

Oh, it's just, um...

[laughs]

[Strickland] This
person was a suspect?

[Laughs]

No, that was a blonde

who just happened
to be riding a bicycle.

I got the framing
slightly out on that one.

[Laughs continue]

Thomas Gerrard.

Yeah, recently released
after a long stretch

for dealing in
controlled substances.

Plenty of previous,
including a gbh charge -

dropped when the
witness disappeared.

Known associate of
chopper Hadley in the '90s.

[Jack] How did
he lose his fingers?

According to him, nail-biting.

[Scoffs]

Funny Gerrard didn't
figure in the springer inquiry.

Who was the
investigating officer?

Andy cutler.

Is he still in the job?

No. Retired, 1999.

30 years in?

No, he went early.

Medical grounds. He was
working in vice when he resigned.

Moved over from mod.

Then you must know him, Gerry.

Our paths crossed, yeah.

[Clicking on phone]

[Punching]

I see you're keeping busy

during your
retirement, mr cutler.

How about if I'm Andy
and you're Sandra?

I mean, we're all
on the same side.

I hope so.

Keep your guard up, Marvin!

[Punching]

We're looking at the
Micky springer case again.

Well, I hope you have
more luck than I did.

Luck?

[Chuckles] I'll have to watch
my words with you, Sandra.

I can see that.

No, it's not just luck.

It's resources and priorities.

So you're saying that

you didn't prioritise
the springer case?

We had a serial
sex killer trying

for the guinness book
of records at the time.

Springer was a
dead minor criminal.

Be honest, where would
you have spent your budget?

Fair point.

Keep moving, deano!

[Sandra] Let's see if we can
make a better job of it now.

Do you recognise
either of these?

Well, Derek Hadley
featured in the investigation,

as the records show, but we
had no forensics or weapon

or even cause of death
to tie him to springer.

The other one, Gerrard,

I don't recall his
name coming up at all.

Would you have done anything
differently with hindsight?

Situation like that
where you got one slag

knocking off another,

they're not gonna leave
evidence lying around.

They know the score.

So it's down to information

and nobody was talking.

I couldn't see a way round that.

It may look like a crap
result to you, Sandra,

but it was the best
we could manage.

Thanks for being
straight with me, Andy.

I may want to get back to
you as the work progresses.

Of course, my pleasure.

I hear you're working
with Gerry standing?

Yeah.

Give him my regards.

Tell him it's been too long.

Okay, I will. Bye.

- [Punching]
- [Slow piano music]

This the place?

Yeah, this is it.

[Rustling]

So, 2:35am on 10th
November 1997,

a police area car
observes a vehicle

emerge from this cul-De-sac
without its lights on.

Micky springer was last
seen alive on November 9th.

So the area car
pulls the vehicle over.

It's registered to Derek Hadley,

but the driver identifies
himself as Thomas Gerrard.

They searched the car, I hope.

Yeah. A routine search
reveals nothing suspicious.

Gerrard tests
negative for alcohol.

He's cautioned and
proceeds on his way.

2:30 in the morning. He must
have been up to something.

I'll say.

This is a cul-De-sac, so
he wasn't passing through.

Unless he was visiting
somebody who lived here.

I wonder who.

[Up tempo music]

[Camera shutter clicks]

[Camera shutter clicks]

[Car engine running]

[Car door shuts]

[Dramatic piano music]

[Dramatic music]

This is one of
Hadley's properties.

A gorgeous gaffe in wimbledon.

Was this traffic stop
in the original files?

No, it was in a
dossier on Gerrard.

There's a copy in
the traffic reports.

Now, as you can
see, he's had a bit

of a falling out with
his estate agent.

We're working
through land registry

in local authority
records of the properties

in the cul-De-sac.

Trying to find out what Gerrard

was doing there that night.

So cutler must have
known that Hadley's car

was pulled over
in the early hours

round the time of the murder.

Excuse me. I thought
you might be interested.

So why didn't he
follow it through?

I think your mate Andy
dropped a bollock there.

Yeah? Well, you give him grief.

I wasn't involved. I'm
going out for a cigarette.

I've checked through
Andy cutler's resignation.

Now, he did retire
on medical grounds

but he was also the
subject of a cib investigation.

What for?

Corruption.

So presumably that
was after he left murder.

Yeah. Yeah, it was two
years after the springer inquiry.

I think I want to
talk to him again.

[Dramatic music]

I don't remember
anything about this.

It's in the traffic reports.

If you followed this
up, you could've had

a forensic team
crawling all over Hadley.

His cars, his properties
and, if he'd been responsible,

you could have nailed him.

It should have been followed up.

I was in the charge. I
take the responsibility.

That's very good, Andy.

Now, is there anything
else I ought to know

about the handling
of this inquiry?

Like I said, it
wasn't top priority.

There were some mistakes.

I don't think we're
talking about mistakes.

Laziness and
incompetence are bad...

Hang about!

But they're not criminal.

Whereas deliberate
sabotage is something else.

You see, you were
on the take in vice...

Nobody ever proved that!

So maybe you were up for
a bung in the murder squad.

[Piano music]

I want everything you
know about springer,

and if I think
you're holding back,

I'll have your conduct
on this case investigated

with a view to bringing
criminal proceedings.

Get out of my face, sweetheart.

I've got nothing more to
tell you 'cause I'm clean.

As clean as Gerry
standing, anyway.

There's nothing you
can tell me about Gerry

I don't already know.

[Chuckles] He could
always wind tarts

round his little finger.

Believe me, if I go down,
I can take Gerry with me.

How's your unsolved crimes
unit gonna look then, eh?

Gerry, me old China. I see
you landed on your feet, then.

Nice soft job.

Andy.

Perhaps you can escort
your friend off the premises.

The thinking man's crumpet.

Ah, Sandra, the very man!

Eh?

We need a pukka police officer.

We want a search warrant.

What for?

- We'll show you.
- Come on.

[Dramatic music]

All for one and
one for all, Gerry.

That's the way to look at it.

Are you trying to drop me in it?

[Dramatic music]

Andy?

So what's happening, chaps?

We're off on a recce.

Oh, yeah?

[Sandra] It doesn't
need all of us.

You keep up the surveillance.

Yeah, all right.

In 1996, Derek Hadley
acquired two adjoining properties

in this mews for development.

In the summer of '97, Hadley
got planning permission

to knock both of them into one.

Work was in progress
during November of that year.

And this is the result?

[Jack] Which he sold on
for a very handsome profit

in the spring of '98.

[Sandra] He's done a nice job.

Yeah, beware of hidden defects.

In the kitchen, the
old wooden floor

was ripped out and
replaced with concrete,

and that work was
going on in November '97.

On November 10th,

Tommy Gerrard's
discovered lurking around here

in the early hours
of the morning.

A good opportunity to
hide a bit of evidence.

What if that
evidence was an axe?

With Micky springer's
blood on the sharp end?

And Hadley's dabs on the handle.

Sounds like a good
piece of evidence to me.

Worth a try.

Let's get a warrant.

[Tense music]

[Camera shutter clicks]

[Dramatic music]

[Machine whirring]

What's that?

Pipework. Central heating.

This ain't half making
a hole in my budget.

It is interesting,
though, isn't it?

This is anomalous.

[Brain] Ooh. What is it?

Can't tell, but it shouldn't

be under a solid kitchen floor.

Here we go.

You'd better break the good
news to the householders.

Yeah.

[Officer chisels
at concrete floor]

[Muffled] Stop.

- [Hammering]
- [Dramatic music]

I don't think we're
looking at weapons here.

Oh, dear.

[Camera shutter clicks]

[Camera shutter clicks]

Forensic dentistry tells us

this is Micky springer's skull

and pathology says that
the head and the hands

were severed from
the body post mortem.

And the plant material?

The stem and fragments of
a red Rose petal in the lab.

Ooh. Somebody cared for him.

Somebody butchered
him and hid the bits.

What did he die of?

A deep linear incised
wound in the cranium

causing massive brain damage.

Caused by?

Well, a heavy thwack
to the head with a cleaver

or an axe.

So, what's our next move?

10 years on, we can't
expect any forensics

from Hadley or Gerrard,

and if we pull them
in for questioning,

we'll just alert
them to the inquiry.

Mm.

Is there any way we
can get close to Hadley?

Undercover?

Yeah. Get his confidence.

Get him talking.

If anyone at all is
interested in my opinion...

Oh, Gerry, please.

Well, like I was
trying to tell you,

Hadley's fallen out
with his estate agent

over the sale of the house.

Now, there's 5 million
riding on this deal,

and we know that
Hadley urgently needs

to wrap up all his UK businesses

'cause he's on a plane at
the end of the week, right?

So, a "buyer" comes along.

A buyer with loads of
flash cash to unload,

and he works out a deal

how they can get
round capital gains,

a sort of kindred spirit,
someone a mile wide.

Now, I wonder who
could play that role, Gerry!

Yeah, and anyone
with that sort of money

would have a drop-dead
gorgeous trophy wife.

Covered from
head to foot in bling.

Versace threads and
Jimmy choo ones and twos.

Come on, Sandra.

You were born for it!

[Upbeat music]

I'll go and talk to strickland
before he knocks off.

If you've made
any crumbs in there,

you can clear them up yourself.

I don't make crumbs.

[Sandra] Did you buy me a
whole duck or half a duck?

Yeah, I can't hang
around for long...

[Jack] Bastards!

[Sandra] No, hang on, Jack!

- [Slow dramatic music]
- Take it easy.

[Slow dramatic music]

This isn't opportunist vandals.

You're being targeted, Jack.

I know that.

Why, has anything like
this happened before?

No, nothing like this.

A couple of incidents -

slashed tyres, wreath delivered.

Micky springer?

This is all tied up
with Hadley, isn't it?

Yeah.

Why didn't you tell us?

You'd have taken
me off the case.

Investigating officer
emotionally involved.

You're not a copper, Jack.

I don't think I have to
apply the same rules to you.

About this undercover idea.

I managed to get
clearance for it late last night.

That's fantastic!

We really appreciate
your backing.

But you can forget
about swanning off

and doing it yourselves.

Sir?

Derek Hadley is a
major criminal target.

A lot of other units
want a piece of him.

Oh, really?

The undercover aspect
of the investigation

will be handled by a trained

and qualified
undercover officer.

You want to bring
someone in over my head?

Don't be negative.

This is inter-agency
multi-tasking, Sandra.

It's the way forward.

That comes from
the highest levels.

You do realise this will
undermine my authority

and disrupt my team!

This is not a
consultation exercise.

I've already organised
a suitable officer.

[Dramatic music]

So, what keeps me on the rails

is a cocktail of
psychotropic substances.

I see. So what would you
be like if you didn't take these?

[Chuckles]

[Gerry] Ah, good morning!

[Brian] Oh, this is Tina.

Hello, Tina.

Detective inspector Tina Murray.

Gerry standing.

Jack halford, how'd you do?

Good to meet you.

Good. Glad to see
you're getting acquainted.

[Tina] Good morning, sir.

Detective inspector Tina Murray,

this is detective
superintendent Sandra Pullman.

Good to be working
with you, ma'am.

Well, would someone like
to bring us up to speed?

Tina's undercover.

Oh, yeah. So who are you really?

[Chuckles]

Di Murray's here on a
strictly limited attachment.

I've been having a very
interesting talk with Brian.

Er, listen, I wouldn't want you

to get the impression
that we're all...

I think you'll find,
excuse me, that we bring

a variety of
skills to the table.

I know.

We've done a thorough
review of your records

to find out which of you

I'll be going into
the field with.

You're going in?

It's not negotiable, Gerry,
it's a command decision.

Well, what you're going
to need Tina, my girl,

is a partner who's
well on top of the case,

can make consistent and
creative use of his cover story

and can front it up
with a top-ten villain.

Absolutely correct.

Well, you can count me out.

I have an aversion
to amateur theatricals.

We've made our choice.

I'll go in with Brian.

[Spits]

Right, well, I'll leave you

to sort out the
operational details yourself.

Thank you, sir.

How'd you work that one out?

Well, when you're undercover,

you need to be able
to recall instantly

every detail of your legend.

Please! We've been doing
this since before you were born.

And he's just given
me a potted history

of the British pharmaceutical
industry plus illustrations.

Memory Lane, Gerry.

I don't believe this.

So the order of battle is
me and Brian in the field.

You've given a lot of thought

to the deployment of my team.

Well, given your
expertise and authority,

we'll be depending hugely on you

and mr halford as back-up.

I'll be monitoring
your every move.

[Dramatic music]

And what about me?

Well, I'm sure detective
superintendent Pullman

will keep you occupied.

[Dramatic music continues]

Right, let's get cracking.

Dry white wine?

No, thanks. I'm on duty.

Huh, apparently I'm not.

Yeah, that could have
been handled better.

When I joined
cid that little girl

would have been making the tea.

Hmm! So would I!

Oh, please, Sandra, this
isn't about feminist solidarity,

it's about me being sidelined.

Why'd you think
that might be, Gerry?

Andy cutler's marked
my cards, hasn't he?

How would he have done that?

[Sighs]

If there's something
I should know,

I'd like to hear it from
you, not Andy cutler.

Let's sit down.

When cutler and I were in vice,

we went to all the best places.

Knocking shops, massage
parlours, illegal gambling joints...

I can just imagine.

Yeah, well, we had
this really useful contact.

Nice lady, ran a clean house

and all the girls
were well looked after.

Well, we heard
she was due a raid.

So we thought, "well,
what good's that gonna do?"

I mean, because of her, we
had control of the whole area,

more or less.

So Andy tipped her the wink?

Did you know about this?

Of course I knew,
he was my partner.

But she slipped him two grand.

What about you?

Well, I had my usual problems,

too many wives,
too many kids and

he passed a monkey on to me.

Just to see me over.

- Gerry.
- Yeah, but he gave it to me.

She didn't.

Nobody was harmed, nobody
knew and nobody complained.

I could Nick you right now.

Yeah?

Are you going to?

You should have told me as
soon as his name came up.

You should have told me, Gerry.

I'm telling you now.

Is there anything
else I should know?

No.

No, no, scouts honour. Nothing.

Thank god for that.

So where do I stand?

Well, given your
involvement with cutler,

I don't think you should be

in the frontline
of this inquiry.

Uh-huh.

Well, you'll be
getting my resignation

in writing in the morning.

I won't accept it.

[Scoffs]

Esther?

Mm?

I shall be going
operational very shortly.

While I'm in the field, I will
be totally incommunicado.

I'm afraid I can't
reveal any details

as to my circumstances
or whereabouts.

Oh, never mind.

I suppose there's
always the chance

that I won't come back.

Well, I'll make you
some sandwiches.

[Sighs]

There's something I
want you to know, Esther.

Mm?

I shall be operating in a
covert, clandestine manner

away from home,
possibly for days at a time.

I will be partnered by...

A young female.

That's nice.

I want to reassure you, Esther,

that you need have
no worries about...

My fidelity.

[Esther giggles]

Oh, Brian, you are priceless.

[Esther continues giggling]

- [Car engine roars]
- [Upbeat music]

Derek Hadley.

Hi, I'm Brian, and this is
Tina, my personal assistant.

Right,

Tina.

Derek.

Come in. Come in.

We spoke to the agents,

but they said you were
handling the sale yourself.

Bunch of wankers.

Oh, pardon me, miss.

Oh! [Chuckles]

They weren't doing the
business, know what I mean?

So you don't live here yourself?

No, no, no, the
house is being let -

top end of the
market, of course.

Executives, diplomats,
but I'm based abroad,

so it's time for me to
wrap up my UK interests.

Ah. So you're looking
for a quick sale?

Well, at the right price, Brian.

Of course, the domestic
property market's not what it was.

Yeah, but in the long run

you can always rely
on bricks and mortar.

We need to do a lot of
work. Change all the decor.

Those light fittings!

Instal a pool and a home gym.

[Brian and Tina chuckle]

And we need to
see what you've got

by way of guarantees
as to dry rot,

wet rot, subsidence, damp,
rising damp, woodworm

[over radio] Thermal insulation.

[Jack] He's going over the top.

What's she doing? I'd
have balled him up by now.

Energy efficiency.

Yeah, if we do follow
up on this property,

we'll be getting a surveyor
to look at all of that.

Yes, of course, darling.

So, uh, you'll be
living here yourselves?

It will be our London base.

We're abroad a lot.

Oh yeah, what? Business?

Yeah, Eastern Europe,
Russia, former Soviet republics.

Bit lively out there, innit?

Well, you know how
it is in business Derek,

if you take large risks
you expect large returns.

Same the whole
world over, Brian.

He's biting. Come
on, reel him in.

Give him a chance.

So, Derek, your
asking price for this is?

Five.

Can I see the rest of it?

You can see whatever
you like, my darling.

Look, I don't want to rush you

but I'm leaving the
country very shortly.

I really would like
to get this sorted.

Naturally, but I have
to tell you, Derek,

price is an obstacle, five.

It's a prime location.

Money needs spending on it.

But I need a fair return
on my investment.

Yes, of course you do.

I mean, you're entitled.

But it's not gonna
happen, is it?

You'll be whacked
for capital gains.

Tell me about it.

And I'll be stuck with
a load of stamp duty

on top of the asking price.

In other parts of the world,
we'd find a way round it.

Oh, yeah?

Well, take this for
example, we might agree

on a price of say, three
and a quarter million...

You're taking the piss!

No, all that's what
goes down in the books.

Plus, you get a million in
your hand, cash money.

Have you got that
kind of cash, Brian?

It's not a problem for me.

In fact...

- Brian!
- Tina!

[Brian laughs]

I think Derek's a man
of the world, don't you?

[Laughing continues]

The fact is, Derek,
it would quite suit me

to turn cash into an asset
at this moment in time.

Enough said?

I think we've been
a bit previous.

No, they're pushing him too
hard. They could lose him.

I'm gonna need to check you out.

Well, why don't we
both take some time out

to think this over.

Reconvene here tomorrow.

I'm sure we can
find a way forward.

[Football commentators
talking indistinctly on TV]

[Doorbell rings]

Huh, you've got a nerve!

What a nice way to
greet an old mate, Gerry.

Aren't you gonna ask me in?

[Lighthearted music]

[Tense music]

We're being followed.

Don't look round!

- Are you sure?
- Yeah.

Don't worry, I was
trained in defensive driving.

I can lose him.

- No, don't let's lose him.
- Hey?

Let's catch him.

That girl is not
experienced enough,

I think we should
pull her off the case.

- [Car engine starts]
- Her phone's switched off.

So, what do you want, Andy?

I want to do you a favour.

Huh, you've done me enough
favours, thanks very much.

Oh, have I got you into
trouble with the boss?

Your days with ucos
must be numbered.

Take advantage
while you can, mate.

What?

Your lot are going after Hadley.

You tell me what
they've got on him

and how they're playing it,

I'll tell Hadley and
we'll both come away

with a serious amount of wedge.

For your retirement.

It'll be just like
old times, Gerry.

[Grunting]

[Tense piano music]

I'm at the address
they gave you.

They're here now.

No, everything
looks kosher so far.

Right.

Gotcha!

- Hands on the wheel.
- Shit.

Don't look at me!

Who sent you?

I don't know what
you're talking...

Don't give me that crap.

You're watching us. Who for?

You're insane.

Yeah, you better believe it.

Who for?

I'm gonna count to three

and then your head will go
the same way as your fingers.

One,

two...

What the hell is he playing at?

I knew this was a mistake.

Three.

Derek Hadley sent me.

He wants to know if
you're the full shilling.

What else would we be?

He think you're villains.

Course we're bloody villains.

Who else would have a million
in cash for a property scam?

He thinks you're
trying to rip him off.

You tell Hadley
we're on his side.

Otherwise you wouldn't be here.

Got the message?

Sure. Sure.

Pass it on.

[Engine starts]

[Lighthearted music]

[Chuckles] I thought they
made those things illegal.

Yeah, confiscated, may
1993, from a teenage arsonist.

I never throw anything away.

[Grunting]

[Screams in pain]

Get off me, I can't breathe.

Now you talk.

I want to know
everything that you know

about chopper Hadley.

Gerry!

He gave you a bun, didn't he?

Hey? So you could go soft
on the murder investigation?

Didn't he?

[Crack] Well?

Yes, all right, he did.

So...

Keep talking.

- I don't know any more.
- No?

Argh!

Yeah, all right. All right.

Talk to Tommy Gerrard.

And what's he gonna
say, he was an accomplice?

Hadley told me that he...

He cut Gerrard's fingers off

'cause he nearly
dropped him in it

and he cost him so much money,

Gerrard's shit-scared of
Hadley but he hates his guts.

[Heavy breathing]

Just get out of here!

[Heavy breathing continues]

You used to be all right,
Gerry, but you changed.

You know, for once in
your life, Andy, you're right.

Now, push on!

I've been trying to
get through to you

for the past 12 hours.

What the hell was Brian
playing at last night?

Look, Tina, you're supposed
to be the undercover expert,

you should be
keeping him in line.

Sandra?

Just put him on, will you?

We've got a break through.

Gerry, I'm in the middle
of something here.

Well, get him out of the shower.

No, okay, fair point.
There are limits.

Get him to phone me
back urgently. Thank you.

Tommy Gerrard is
the key to this case.

How'd you make that out?

Well, I reckon he's
playing his own game.

He's setting Jack and
Hadley up against each other.

Why would he be doing that?

He nearly dropped
Hadley right in it.

When he was dumping the evidence

and he nearly got
nicked, remember?

When he was pulled over in
Hadley's car outside the mews.

So, Hadley took his fingers off.

He hates Hadley's guts.

[Phone rings]

Hang on, Brian.

Where did you get this from?

Oh, information received.

Oh, you mean bullshit from
one of your dodgy snouts?

No, it's not, actually.

Well, who's it from then?

I'd rather not
reveal the source.

Okay, let me deal with Brian.

Brian, could you explain to me

what you were up to last night.

Look, is it okay if I
stick with Gerrard?

See what he's
actually playing at.

- Yeah, yeah. Whatever.
- Right.

I'm sorry about last night
but you know how it is.

You have to take precautions.

Perfectly understandable.

The important thing is we
all play for the same team.

I'll drink to that.

[Glasses clink]

Now, I really need
to get this sorted

because my plane is
booked for tomorrow.

We're your kind
of people, Derek.

We're ready to commit.

Magic!

Brian...

- Tina.
- [Tina giggles]

Course the lawyers will have

to sort out all the
paperwork but...

[Tina] By way of a deposit.

I think this could be the
start of a beautiful friendship.

Come on. This is
your moment, go for it.

One thing I have
to ask you, Derek.

I mean, we did a bit of research
on you, like you did on us,

[chuckles]

And apparently, on the street,

you're always known as chopper.

[Brian laughs]

That brought a
blush to her cheeks.

Bollocks! I knew what it meant.

[Brian laughs]

It's just reputation, isn't it?

I mean, we've dealt
with some hard cases.

Oh, I'll say - Russian,
cherchens, we take no prisoners.

I can imagine.

But you, Derek, I mean
you're just a pussycat, really.

[Brian chuckles]

Well, did you ever actually
use an axe on somebody?

Go on, Derek, indulge her.

I've done it all,
darling. Enough said.

Hey, come on, what
are you actually saying?

What, threats, wounding?

You don't mean...?

You'll find out what I can do

if we're ever up against it.

All right, now leave it, Tina.

She's lost it -
pushed him too hard.

She's useless! I should
have been doing this.

Which brings me
to another matter

I wanted to put to you two.

You two have got
venture capital,

you're up for taking chances.

I could put you in the
way of something massive.

What we saying here, Derek?

You wanna shift more
of that straightaway?

Sky's the limit.

I'm talking millions.

You could be in for a piece,
you could be in for the lot.

I'll just make a phone call.

No, mate.

The thing is, you're
either in or you're out.

And if you're in, you and I
don't lose sight of each other

until I show you the goods.

- [Tense music]
- This is interesting.

Yeah, but we
haven't scripted for it.

They'll have to busk it.

All right, Derek, we're
sporting people. You're in.

[Grunts]

Pick the bones
out of this, halford.

[Camera shutter clicks]

[Bushes rustle]

Who the hell are you?

Gerry standing. I
work for the police.

And now they've
got your picture.

[Grunts]

Now, be sensible, Tommy.

My guv'nor will deal
with you. Let's move.

No, no. You don't want
me talking to your guv'nor.

Why not?

You've been working
on your own, haven't you?

You've been winding
Hadley and Jack halford up

against each other, haven't you?

I bet you invited
him to the funeral.

Oh, very clever, and do
you know why, smart arse?

I've got you sussed.

You wanna pay him back
for chopping your fingers off.

Urgh!

- Urgh!
- Uh.

[Grunts]

It's got nothing to do
with me bleeding fingers.

What then?

Hadley and halford, they
killed the love of my life.

Are we talking another
murder here? Who was she?

We're talking about
Micky springer.

What, you and him!

Yeah, me and him!

A couple of puffs. Makes a
bleeding laugh, doesn't it, eh?

- [Kicks]
- Uh!

I helped Hadley cut him up

and then I hid the bits.

How do you think
that made me feel, eh?

Did Hadley know?

Course he didn't know!

If he knew, I'd be dead as well.

Halford dumped on
Micky and Hadley killed him

and now it's payback time.

- [Tense music continues]
- Get up!

Yeah, all right. Take it easy.

Now, listen, we both
want Hadley, right?

We're on the same side.

No, mate.

Hadley got away with killing
Micky 'cause nobody cared,

but they'll care about you.

- Now, move!
- Uh! All right.

So where exactly
are we going, Derek?

Come on, it can't do
any harm to tell us now.

I want to surprise you
Brian, and young Tina here.

- She thinks I'm a pussycat.
- [Tina chuckles]

[Hadley over radio]
Prepare to be amazed.

What's he playing at?

I know where they're going.

[Bell chimes]

It's not far.

I buried my old man
here a few days ago.

You have my sympathy,
Derek, but I don't quite see...

I'm gonna dig him up.

Oh, my god.

I'm not with you, mate.

Diamonds.

[Over radio] 20
million quids' worth.

Nicked in Sierra Leone
during the civil war,

smuggled up to Morocco,
across the straits of the Spain,

into the UK and my dad's coffin.

Nothing like keeping
it in the family.

My old man knew his time was up.

He wasn't scared, he was ready.

Looked me straight in the
eye, made his last request.

He said, "son, I want to
go out the way I've lived,

"pulling a diabolical stroke."

It's the least I
could do for him.

Well, we're deeply
moved, Derek, but...

Exhuming a body
is a long, hard job

and I'm not in the
first flush of youth.

Oh, leave it out Brian,
what do you take me for?

I've got a jcb to do
the heavy digging.

The only manual work
will be the delicate stuff,

right at the end,
when we pull dad out.

Oh, my god, that's
it. I'm out of here.

I'm totally out of here.

[Brian chuckles]

Jack, Gerry just sent me this.

I think you better
take a look at it.

Tommy Gerrard.

Hadley must be thick as pigshit.

All this stuff is bound to
wind you up, not scare you off.

I thought that would
have been obvious but...

So, Tommy Gerrard's
pulling a stroke of his own.

Why?

Uh! Uh!

Bloody hell, Tommy. Who's this?

He was following me.
Says he works for the police.

His name's standing.

Urgh!

All yours, guv.

[Hadley] He's not
standing now, is he?

We better get in there.

Jack, you can't go
steaming in without back-up.

There's no time.

You've got my phone.

Use mine.

Yeah, ds Pullman,
what's your eta?

- [Punching]
- Urgh!

What is it with you people?

Derek, Derek, Derek, listen.

I know the bastard. I've
had dealings with him.

He's a nasty piece of work.

Let me have a go at him. I
owe him a bloody good clogging.

It's the last resting place
of my beloved father,

those sodding bollocks.

Is there no respect
in the world?

I know, Derek. Let
me have a go at him.

You wanna know how I
got my name, sweetheart?

Just watch this.

No, Derek, Derek,
let's talk about this.

I'm not putting
up with this crap.

No. Derek, no.

Just for crossing me up!

You've been crossed
up again, chopper!

What are you doing here?

Ask your man, Tommy.

He's been winding
me up all week -

putting the frighteners on me -

hoping I'd believe it was you.

That's crap, guv.
I wouldn't do...

Vandalising my property
and making threats.

- It's crap, guv.
- Take a look.

Earlier tonight -
my back garden.

And who do you think invited me

to your dad's funeral
in the first place?

Gerrard's your enemy.

I had your fingers, you toerag,

now I'm gonna have your head!

- No, guv.
- Armed police!

Armed police.

Put your weapons down and
raise you hands above your heads!

Bollocks!

Put your weapon
on the floor! Drop it!

[Tina screams]

Urgh!

[Dramatic music]

Well, that was a
splendid result, Sandra.

Case solved,
villains in the bin.

- It was a balls-up!
- What do you mean?

It's a bloody miracle one
of my team didn't get killed!

Yeah, well those boys
will stick their necks out.

No, no. Oh, no.

You stuck their necks out!

- No, that's...
- I should have been in there.

No, we've talked
about this before.

The case needed
an undercover officer.

She fell apart.

Well, that was role play,
Sandra. You don't understand...

Oh, role play, my
arse! She bottled it!

Yes, well, thank
you for your input.

This conversation is now closed.

Not quite.

Ds Pullman!

Don't dump on my team again.

Sir.

[Dramatic piano music]

Brian?

It's all over, Esther.

The good guys won.

[Esther sneezes]

Ooh! Are you wearing aftershave?

It's called "lethal, for men."

Well, don't get
it on the sheets.

Oh, what have you been doing?

Or is it still top secret?

No, I can speak now.

Well, I've solved a
ten year old murder,

recovered 20 million pounds
worth of smuggled diamonds

from the grave of
a notorious killer.

All this came through
a gay gangster

who was forced to
dismember his dead lover.

Brian, if you can't
say anything sensible,

just let me go back to sleep.

Uh!

♪ It's all right, it's okay ♪

♪ doesn't really matter
if you're old and grey ♪

♪ it's all right, I
say, it's okay ♪

♪ listen to what I say ♪

♪ it's all right, doing fine ♪

♪ doesn't really matter
if the sun don't shine ♪

♪ it's all right, I
say, it's okay ♪

♪ we're getting to
the end of the day ♪

♪ high-tech, low-tech,
take your pick ♪

♪ 'cause you can't teach an
old dog a brand-new trick ♪

♪ I don't care what
anybody says ♪