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1
00:00:06,446 --> 00:00:09,154
The bond between a
father and a daughter...
2
00:00:09,249 --> 00:00:11,620
There's absolutely nothing like it.
3
00:00:12,132 --> 00:00:16,453
I always used to say my
mom gave me my drive but
4
00:00:16,680 --> 00:00:18,818
my dad gave me my dreams.
5
00:00:20,140 --> 00:00:21,858
As little girls,
6
00:00:22,166 --> 00:00:26,430
we dream of all the big life moments
we're gonna share with our dads...
7
00:00:26,721 --> 00:00:30,929
First day of school, first bike
ride with our training wheels,
8
00:00:31,333 --> 00:00:34,546
first dance, pre-k graduation,
9
00:00:34,756 --> 00:00:36,375
middle school graduation,
10
00:00:36,625 --> 00:00:39,247
just all the graduations.
11
00:00:40,372 --> 00:00:42,168
And, of course, our weddings.
12
00:00:42,371 --> 00:00:46,555
My gown is going to be
pure white with tons of lace
13
00:00:46,692 --> 00:00:50,796
and a train stretching
on for miles and miles,
14
00:00:50,880 --> 00:00:55,399
- just like my mom's.
- OK, but who's going to help you carry that train?
15
00:00:55,431 --> 00:00:56,810
You, of course.
16
00:00:56,842 --> 00:01:00,557
For my wedding, I'm going to have
a simple but elegant pant suit.
17
00:01:00,674 --> 00:01:03,341
You can't wear a pant suit
for your wedding, Olivia.
18
00:01:03,383 --> 00:01:04,596
Of course I can.
19
00:01:04,661 --> 00:01:08,428
My dad says I can do whatever I
want, 'cause I'm a change-maker.
20
00:01:08,655 --> 00:01:11,568
He says one day I'm gonna
change the whole world.
21
00:01:11,614 --> 00:01:12,986
With a pant suit?
22
00:01:13,032 --> 00:01:15,347
All I know is Daddy's always right.
23
00:01:16,946 --> 00:01:18,376
Problem is,
24
00:01:18,661 --> 00:01:21,853
while we're dreaming these big
dreams of life with our hero,
25
00:01:22,202 --> 00:01:25,888
no one ever warns us that those
same dreams could be cut short.
26
00:01:26,231 --> 00:01:28,212
That we could just
wake up one day and...
27
00:01:28,866 --> 00:01:30,647
our dad's just...
28
00:01:31,844 --> 00:01:33,301
Gone.
29
00:01:38,858 --> 00:01:40,266
Hey.
30
00:01:40,460 --> 00:01:43,211
- Hey. You OK?
- I just... I'm sorry.
31
00:01:43,244 --> 00:01:44,946
I just really need you to get up.
32
00:01:47,360 --> 00:01:49,541
Liv, it's the middle of
the night. What's wrong?
33
00:01:49,589 --> 00:01:52,559
I'm not gonna make it through
the night without taking a drink.
34
00:01:52,591 --> 00:01:54,294
I just... I need both of you, please.
35
00:01:56,889 --> 00:01:58,424
Hey, hey. Come here.
36
00:01:58,449 --> 00:02:00,456
Come here, come here, come here.
37
00:02:59,979 --> 00:03:01,429
Thank you.
38
00:03:02,911 --> 00:03:04,924
I'm glad you have each other.
39
00:03:25,485 --> 00:03:26,779
OK.
40
00:03:26,935 --> 00:03:29,155
Hey. I didn't hear you come in.
41
00:03:29,162 --> 00:03:31,591
I didn't wanna wake
you, and Ash let me in.
42
00:03:31,614 --> 00:03:33,090
Oh.
43
00:03:34,022 --> 00:03:35,369
Whatcha got here?
44
00:03:35,524 --> 00:03:37,511
These are my famous hot cakes.
45
00:03:37,563 --> 00:03:40,574
Well, thank you, but I can't
eat all that before a workout.
46
00:03:41,752 --> 00:03:44,842
Uh, well, my mama always said
food is medicine for the soul.
47
00:03:44,864 --> 00:03:46,893
I appreciate you and your mama,
48
00:03:47,042 --> 00:03:48,324
but I gotta get to the gym.
49
00:03:48,362 --> 00:03:49,780
Spence, why the rush?
50
00:03:49,877 --> 00:03:52,613
I know Coach Baker's funeral
was only a couple days ago.
51
00:03:52,632 --> 00:03:55,875
I don't think anyone's expecting
you to rush back to anything.
52
00:03:55,992 --> 00:03:57,849
I was thinking we could talk.
53
00:03:57,959 --> 00:04:00,859
I know how hard it must have
been for you losing Coach Baker.
54
00:04:00,880 --> 00:04:03,559
It's the cycle of life, right?
55
00:04:03,740 --> 00:04:06,269
What happened to Coach ain't
something none of us can change.
56
00:04:06,508 --> 00:04:08,367
Look, I really gotta
get this workout in,
57
00:04:08,408 --> 00:04:11,384
so maybe later, you and I can
tear into that stack of hot cakes.
58
00:04:12,070 --> 00:04:13,430
All right.
59
00:04:20,743 --> 00:04:24,375
Do I call my mom? Do... do
we keep her with us all day?
60
00:04:24,647 --> 00:04:26,012
You know what? Screw it.
61
00:04:26,206 --> 00:04:27,468
I'm just gonna call her sponsor
62
00:04:27,488 --> 00:04:29,695
and if Liv gets mad,
she can get mad, OK?
63
00:04:33,598 --> 00:04:35,242
Layla. Hi.
64
00:04:35,294 --> 00:04:36,667
- Hi.
- It's good to see you.
65
00:04:36,667 --> 00:04:38,602
Yeah. Jordan?
66
00:04:39,891 --> 00:04:41,703
You both look like you've seen a ghost.
67
00:04:41,761 --> 00:04:43,386
Um, no, sorry, it's just
68
00:04:43,431 --> 00:04:45,224
we were literally about to call you.
69
00:04:45,257 --> 00:04:47,445
Yeah, uh, how did you know to come here?
70
00:04:47,516 --> 00:04:48,927
I called her.
71
00:04:50,216 --> 00:04:51,912
I called everyone, actually.
72
00:04:52,190 --> 00:04:54,456
If I'm gonna get through
today and not drink, I'm...
73
00:04:55,006 --> 00:04:57,646
- I'm gonna need my village.
- Atta girl.
74
00:05:16,208 --> 00:05:18,221
These past couple weeks have been
75
00:05:18,506 --> 00:05:19,917
really, really hard.
76
00:05:20,040 --> 00:05:23,607
Um, last night, I just...
I had nothing left,
77
00:05:23,803 --> 00:05:26,022
and I would've had a drink
78
00:05:26,216 --> 00:05:28,061
if I didn't get help, so...
79
00:05:28,287 --> 00:05:30,747
Why didn't you say
anything sooner, sweetheart?
80
00:05:30,773 --> 00:05:32,864
Because I'm not the
only one that lost Dad,
81
00:05:33,058 --> 00:05:36,696
and focusing it on me just felt selfish.
82
00:05:36,729 --> 00:05:38,392
No one would've thought that, Liv.
83
00:05:38,457 --> 00:05:40,114
OK, we're here now,
84
00:05:40,230 --> 00:05:42,041
so how can we help, Olivia?
85
00:05:42,141 --> 00:05:43,849
I texted everyone
86
00:05:44,544 --> 00:05:47,105
all my usual hiding places
for my pills and stuff.
87
00:05:47,131 --> 00:05:48,892
Jordan already did a sweep this morning,
88
00:05:48,908 --> 00:05:52,508
so I guess just keep
checking and keep me honest.
89
00:05:52,592 --> 00:05:55,335
OK, this is, um, this is all
that was left in the house.
90
00:05:55,435 --> 00:05:58,216
That's your dad's. That's from...
91
00:05:58,961 --> 00:06:01,174
- how did you get...
- I took it from his office
92
00:06:01,194 --> 00:06:02,579
the night of the memorial
93
00:06:02,709 --> 00:06:05,220
and I've been holding
on to it and, um...
94
00:06:07,472 --> 00:06:09,952
I just... I can't keep
fighting this alone.
95
00:06:10,004 --> 00:06:13,473
You don't have to. We
can do regular sweeps.
96
00:06:13,493 --> 00:06:15,875
We can take turns driving you to A.A.
97
00:06:16,069 --> 00:06:17,972
I mean, whatever it takes, honestly.
98
00:06:20,367 --> 00:06:22,801
I don't think I can be left alone.
99
00:06:28,803 --> 00:06:31,360
Uh, well, then we won't leave you alone.
100
00:06:34,985 --> 00:06:37,665
- Hey, baby.
- Hey. How's Liv?
101
00:06:37,717 --> 00:06:39,499
Impressively strong.
102
00:06:39,847 --> 00:06:42,054
- We're all taking shifts with her today.
- Hmm.
103
00:06:42,502 --> 00:06:45,214
And this is why the Vortex rocks.
104
00:06:45,706 --> 00:06:47,473
I'm gonna get a refill. Do you want one?
105
00:06:47,538 --> 00:06:49,629
These baby books I'm reading
say that too much caffeine
106
00:06:49,635 --> 00:06:51,525
can elevate your blood
pressure and heart rate.
107
00:06:51,596 --> 00:06:55,351
So can sex. You gonna stop that, too?
108
00:06:55,384 --> 00:06:57,801
No, we don't have to follow
these books word for word.
109
00:06:57,837 --> 00:06:59,198
We can just, you know.
110
00:06:59,225 --> 00:07:01,079
That's what I thought. Mm-hmm.
111
00:07:01,478 --> 00:07:03,968
Oh! My doctor just got back to me.
112
00:07:03,989 --> 00:07:06,571
She can see us at 2:00 today
for our first ultrasound.
113
00:07:07,089 --> 00:07:08,959
- OK.
- Wait.
114
00:07:09,128 --> 00:07:10,816
I thought our appointment
was in a few weeks.
115
00:07:10,855 --> 00:07:14,333
It was, but she wants to start
monitoring me early because of my lupus.
116
00:07:14,382 --> 00:07:16,965
Is that normal? Is she
concerned? Does she think that...
117
00:07:17,003 --> 00:07:19,231
- that something could be wrong or...
- Hey, Ash, slow down.
118
00:07:19,270 --> 00:07:22,617
She's just taking precautions to
make sure I have a healthy pregnancy.
119
00:07:23,102 --> 00:07:25,084
It's a good thing, babe.
120
00:07:46,982 --> 00:07:48,327
OK.
121
00:07:48,470 --> 00:07:51,171
Dad must've ordered this before...
122
00:07:52,672 --> 00:07:54,594
You know, it's weird to
think that this... this...
123
00:07:54,634 --> 00:07:56,925
this could've been one of
the last things that he did.
124
00:07:57,967 --> 00:07:59,845
I'm sorry, Jordan.
125
00:08:00,305 --> 00:08:01,865
You know, we can just set it aside
126
00:08:01,881 --> 00:08:03,354
till your mom's ready to deal with it.
127
00:08:03,425 --> 00:08:05,426
No, I don't... I don't
wanna put her through that.
128
00:08:05,490 --> 00:08:07,834
- OK. Do you want me to open it?
- I don't know.
129
00:08:07,950 --> 00:08:09,717
If... if we open it,
130
00:08:10,352 --> 00:08:11,536
that's it.
131
00:08:11,860 --> 00:08:13,161
What's it?
132
00:08:14,042 --> 00:08:16,463
There'll be no more
packages, Layla. The...
133
00:08:17,349 --> 00:08:19,376
there'll be no more moments with Dad.
134
00:08:45,413 --> 00:08:47,186
Yo, man. There you are.
135
00:08:47,900 --> 00:08:49,518
Why weren't you at the
Baker house this morning?
136
00:08:49,602 --> 00:08:50,864
Was I supposed to be?
137
00:08:50,974 --> 00:08:53,389
Liv called a family
meeting this morning.
138
00:08:53,563 --> 00:08:55,214
She's struggling with her sobriety,
139
00:08:55,331 --> 00:08:57,104
so we all taking shifts to help her.
140
00:08:58,697 --> 00:09:00,600
Nah. No, I ain't get the call.
141
00:09:01,080 --> 00:09:03,053
You serious, man?
That's all you gotta say?
142
00:09:03,086 --> 00:09:04,568
What do you want from me, Coop?
143
00:09:04,892 --> 00:09:07,533
Sounds like she got all
the support she needs, so...
144
00:09:18,878 --> 00:09:20,603
What's really going on, Olivia?
145
00:09:20,640 --> 00:09:23,885
What do you mean? I... I told
you. I'm trying not to relapse.
146
00:09:23,923 --> 00:09:25,419
Your father passed and you're trying
147
00:09:25,444 --> 00:09:27,873
- not to drink to numb the pain.
- Exactly.
148
00:09:27,970 --> 00:09:30,947
Losing your dad hurts.
I understand that.
149
00:09:31,128 --> 00:09:32,992
And I'm sorry for your pain.
150
00:09:33,032 --> 00:09:34,774
But that's not the whole story.
151
00:09:35,094 --> 00:09:37,059
I've been where you are, remember?
152
00:09:37,344 --> 00:09:40,239
You did the right thing
by activating your village
153
00:09:40,339 --> 00:09:43,157
instead of trying to go
at it alone this time.
154
00:09:43,262 --> 00:09:44,764
And that is growth.
155
00:09:44,905 --> 00:09:47,604
But your village can't
babysit you forever.
156
00:09:47,662 --> 00:09:49,487
So you need to dig deep
157
00:09:49,533 --> 00:09:51,649
and find your why, Liv.
158
00:09:51,951 --> 00:09:53,893
Why now do you want that drink?
159
00:09:54,233 --> 00:09:58,194
Take the leap and find
those answers, today,
160
00:09:58,802 --> 00:10:02,006
while you have your entire
village surrounding you,
161
00:10:02,174 --> 00:10:04,059
ready to catch you if needed.
162
00:10:09,645 --> 00:10:11,871
Coach Baker always had
this thing about shoes.
163
00:10:11,971 --> 00:10:13,820
He said respect started at the feet.
164
00:10:15,600 --> 00:10:17,102
I never understood it
165
00:10:17,465 --> 00:10:19,841
until one day, he gave me
a brand-new pair of cleats.
166
00:10:19,951 --> 00:10:21,680
Told me everyone
always thought his hands
167
00:10:21,701 --> 00:10:23,318
were the key to his
success on the field,
168
00:10:23,382 --> 00:10:24,981
but really it was his footwork.
169
00:10:25,214 --> 00:10:26,845
He said I had the same potential
170
00:10:28,282 --> 00:10:31,330
and then every day, he
made sure I believed it.
171
00:10:31,558 --> 00:10:34,552
Yeah, he was always good at
helping people find their value.
172
00:10:35,924 --> 00:10:37,476
Anyone else wanna share?
173
00:10:40,767 --> 00:10:43,983
I'ma be in this room,
same time, every day.
174
00:10:44,152 --> 00:10:45,873
We're all grieving Coach Baker,
175
00:10:45,977 --> 00:10:47,987
but don't nobody gotta do it alone.
176
00:10:50,236 --> 00:10:51,732
Y'all can roll.
177
00:11:00,723 --> 00:11:03,530
- We need to talk about Jabari.
- Yeah, I'm worried about him.
178
00:11:03,569 --> 00:11:06,145
He still hasn't resumed
his after-school tutoring,
179
00:11:06,185 --> 00:11:08,146
and now he's failed his last two tests.
180
00:11:08,178 --> 00:11:10,211
I don't need to tell
you where this path leads
181
00:11:10,229 --> 00:11:13,136
if he doesn't course correct, and fast.
182
00:11:18,419 --> 00:11:21,680
Well, how's that for accuracy?
183
00:11:23,008 --> 00:11:25,002
Liv, you are not foundering.
184
00:11:25,244 --> 00:11:28,187
Just wish you could see
yourself the way we see you.
185
00:11:28,207 --> 00:11:31,113
You mean like a cliché that's
relapsing 'cause they're grieving?
186
00:11:31,164 --> 00:11:33,255
No, like a badass
187
00:11:33,572 --> 00:11:35,675
who I'm incredibly proud of
188
00:11:35,715 --> 00:11:37,236
for being honest
189
00:11:37,774 --> 00:11:40,188
and letting us be here for her.
190
00:11:40,240 --> 00:11:43,360
But you've been handling
everything so well and I'm...
191
00:11:43,392 --> 00:11:44,875
I have not
192
00:11:45,062 --> 00:11:47,580
been handling my grief well at all.
193
00:11:48,661 --> 00:11:50,099
I cry.
194
00:11:50,546 --> 00:11:51,957
Every day.
195
00:11:52,391 --> 00:11:55,323
Mostly in the shower so
you guys don't hear me.
196
00:11:55,602 --> 00:11:58,729
And every morning that
I can even get out of bed
197
00:11:58,758 --> 00:12:00,496
is nothing short of a miracle.
198
00:12:00,937 --> 00:12:03,668
Mom, I'm so sorry. I didn't know.
199
00:12:03,681 --> 00:12:05,384
Because I didn't want you to know.
200
00:12:07,767 --> 00:12:10,678
I'm sorry, sweetie. I
gotta get this. One second.
201
00:12:10,976 --> 00:12:13,436
Hello? Yes, this is Laura.
202
00:12:27,263 --> 00:12:28,459
Is everything OK?
203
00:12:28,505 --> 00:12:30,485
Yeah. Apparently, in order to get
204
00:12:30,505 --> 00:12:32,672
a copy of your dad's death certificate,
205
00:12:32,711 --> 00:12:36,708
the medical examiner needs a
copy of his social security card.
206
00:12:36,747 --> 00:12:38,398
Well, is it here? I can help you look.
207
00:12:38,437 --> 00:12:39,725
No. It's at his office.
208
00:12:39,809 --> 00:12:42,372
But I can get it another day.
209
00:12:42,392 --> 00:12:45,298
Or we... we could go
today. I can come with you.
210
00:12:46,256 --> 00:12:49,311
Sweetie, the bottle that
you almost drank from
211
00:12:49,434 --> 00:12:51,234
was in Dad's office.
212
00:12:51,363 --> 00:12:54,148
Clearly, it's triggering for you.
213
00:12:55,048 --> 00:12:56,505
I mean, you're right. I...
214
00:12:57,376 --> 00:12:59,437
yeah, I did find the
bottle there, but...
215
00:13:00,699 --> 00:13:03,405
I think that's why I
need to go back there.
216
00:13:03,548 --> 00:13:05,664
You know, Nurse Joy says she thinks
217
00:13:05,703 --> 00:13:08,118
there's more to my wanting to
drink than just missing Dad,
218
00:13:08,157 --> 00:13:12,132
and she said that I need to
use today to dig deep and find
219
00:13:12,151 --> 00:13:15,103
my real "why" if I'm gonna
get through this, so...
220
00:13:15,569 --> 00:13:17,388
If you think it's what you need.
221
00:13:25,605 --> 00:13:27,676
- What up, Coach?
- Spence.
222
00:13:28,328 --> 00:13:30,070
Did not expect to see you here.
223
00:13:30,272 --> 00:13:31,890
Had to get a workout in, you know?
224
00:13:31,932 --> 00:13:33,153
I can't blame you.
225
00:13:33,253 --> 00:13:35,023
Grief isn't a straight line, right?
226
00:13:35,321 --> 00:13:37,580
If you need to talk, bruh, I'm here.
227
00:13:37,774 --> 00:13:39,121
Actually, I do.
228
00:13:40,033 --> 00:13:41,884
Where we at with the team?
229
00:13:42,421 --> 00:13:45,263
- That should be the least of your concerns.
- It's my only concern.
230
00:13:45,367 --> 00:13:47,451
Look, what happened to
Coach Baker is horrible,
231
00:13:47,470 --> 00:13:48,939
but I can't change the past.
232
00:13:49,069 --> 00:13:51,199
I gotta focus on what's
next, and right now,
233
00:13:51,231 --> 00:13:53,348
that's rebuilding GAU's football team.
234
00:13:53,381 --> 00:13:55,588
We'll get there. Let's
focus on yourself.
235
00:13:55,620 --> 00:13:57,847
Has A.D. Barnes reached out
about the head coaching gig?
236
00:13:57,867 --> 00:13:59,809
- We haven't connected yet.
- And what about you?
237
00:13:59,854 --> 00:14:01,168
You reaching out to our new recruits?
238
00:14:01,200 --> 00:14:02,936
- A few here and there.
- Are you scheduling workouts?
239
00:14:02,955 --> 00:14:04,703
- Are you working on new plays? What?
- Hey, Spence, Spence,
240
00:14:04,729 --> 00:14:06,192
take a beat, all right?
241
00:14:06,218 --> 00:14:08,374
GAU football still
has a lot to figure out
242
00:14:08,393 --> 00:14:10,581
before we can even think about
rebuilding the program again.
243
00:14:10,601 --> 00:14:12,698
Sounds like you waiting
to be told what to do.
244
00:14:13,488 --> 00:14:16,335
Why ain't you in there demanding
a meeting with A.D. Barnes?
245
00:14:16,348 --> 00:14:18,918
When did you stop caring about
the future of GAU football, man?
246
00:14:18,950 --> 00:14:20,881
I care about this
program, and you know that.
247
00:14:21,242 --> 00:14:23,123
But more importantly, I care about you.
248
00:14:23,312 --> 00:14:25,487
And it's clear that you
still need more time.
249
00:14:25,792 --> 00:14:28,291
Until then, if you need to talk
250
00:14:28,407 --> 00:14:31,793
or just get a workout
in in silence, I'm here.
251
00:14:31,838 --> 00:14:33,392
Nah, I'm good.
252
00:14:40,318 --> 00:14:43,672
Sorry. That conference call
went longer than I expected.
253
00:14:44,184 --> 00:14:47,330
Jordan, please tell me you've
moved an inch since I left you.
254
00:14:47,937 --> 00:14:50,041
This is
255
00:14:50,370 --> 00:14:52,671
the last part of my
dad that is still alive.
256
00:14:54,411 --> 00:14:56,029
And I know that doesn't
make any sense at all, but...
257
00:14:56,045 --> 00:14:58,189
No, it makes total sense.
258
00:14:58,400 --> 00:15:01,272
Hey, when we lose someone we love,
259
00:15:01,288 --> 00:15:03,254
we do everything we
can to hold on to them.
260
00:15:03,295 --> 00:15:06,714
OK, but Layla, what if this is
where the reminders of him end?
261
00:15:07,218 --> 00:15:08,610
This last box.
262
00:15:10,345 --> 00:15:13,446
About a year ago, I was
really missing my mom,
263
00:15:13,595 --> 00:15:17,933
and then this track
popped up on my computer
264
00:15:17,952 --> 00:15:20,283
from the recent batch my dad gave me.
265
00:15:28,206 --> 00:15:30,549
It's one of my mom's old songs,
266
00:15:30,957 --> 00:15:34,343
and the chorus goes,
"as hard as it can be,
267
00:15:34,530 --> 00:15:36,356
never stop remembering me."
268
00:15:36,783 --> 00:15:39,612
The universe gave me this
little reminder when I needed it.
269
00:15:40,408 --> 00:15:42,122
So this box, Jordan, it's just...
270
00:15:42,563 --> 00:15:44,680
just the beginning of
your dad's reminders.
271
00:15:48,391 --> 00:15:50,411
Thank you.
272
00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:01,616
You would've never have guessed
273
00:16:01,706 --> 00:16:04,601
that this was just moments
after we both got food poisoning
274
00:16:04,711 --> 00:16:07,248
after Dad insisted that
we get street fish tacos.
275
00:16:07,274 --> 00:16:09,618
- I tried to warn you guys.
- I know.
276
00:16:09,806 --> 00:16:12,615
But Dad was so excited I
didn't want him to eat alone.
277
00:16:17,774 --> 00:16:21,192
The memories won't always hurt so much.
278
00:16:21,432 --> 00:16:23,128
Or so they say.
279
00:16:28,319 --> 00:16:31,472
Um, Coop's here to pick
me up for her shift.
280
00:16:31,718 --> 00:16:33,563
Do you want me to tell
her to come back later?
281
00:16:33,582 --> 00:16:36,379
Oh, no, sweetie. You go.
I... I can look for his card.
282
00:16:36,411 --> 00:16:39,739
- Are you sure?
- Liv, I'm... I'm OK here. I promise.
283
00:16:40,361 --> 00:16:42,926
- Go. Coop's waiting.
- OK.
284
00:16:42,958 --> 00:16:44,423
Bye.
285
00:16:59,539 --> 00:17:01,554
Aah!
286
00:17:02,961 --> 00:17:05,065
Watch where you going, fool.
287
00:17:10,544 --> 00:17:12,777
Hey, hey. Hey! Hey! Hey!
288
00:17:13,149 --> 00:17:15,075
What's wrong with you, man?
289
00:17:24,381 --> 00:17:26,023
You're about 7 weeks along.
290
00:17:26,046 --> 00:17:27,868
Baby's measuring perfectly.
291
00:17:27,968 --> 00:17:30,952
And there's your baby's heartbeat.
292
00:17:31,105 --> 00:17:33,064
We'll get some bloodwork today.
293
00:17:35,037 --> 00:17:36,979
- Wait, what for?
- Standard procedure.
294
00:17:37,036 --> 00:17:38,663
Everything's looking good.
295
00:17:38,728 --> 00:17:41,568
- Congratulations.
- Thank you.
296
00:17:44,569 --> 00:17:47,159
- I can't believe this is real.
- I'm...
297
00:17:47,183 --> 00:17:49,465
I'm gonna let you get dressed, OK?
298
00:17:49,481 --> 00:17:51,398
I'll be... I'll be right outside.
299
00:17:54,352 --> 00:17:56,636
Uh, excuse me?
300
00:17:56,734 --> 00:17:58,831
Yes. Mr. Adams.
301
00:17:58,922 --> 00:18:01,019
Are you sure everything looked OK?
302
00:18:01,025 --> 00:18:03,460
I've been doing this a long
time. Things looked great.
303
00:18:03,537 --> 00:18:05,149
And the heartbeat. It wasn't...
304
00:18:05,220 --> 00:18:07,026
wasn't too fast or too slow?
305
00:18:07,045 --> 00:18:09,790
- It was perfect.
- What... what about Jaymee's lupus?
306
00:18:09,939 --> 00:18:12,269
We're gonna keep a close
eye on her and the baby,
307
00:18:12,292 --> 00:18:13,945
but you really shouldn't
worry right now.
308
00:18:13,952 --> 00:18:15,351
Well, on the Internet, it said
309
00:18:15,396 --> 00:18:17,816
- pregnant women who have lupus are...
- Let me stop you right there.
310
00:18:17,906 --> 00:18:19,305
Don't read the Internet.
311
00:18:19,376 --> 00:18:22,407
Jaymee's doing really well and
takes really good care of herself.
312
00:18:22,485 --> 00:18:25,210
For now, try to enjoy this moment.
313
00:18:30,524 --> 00:18:31,884
What was that about?
314
00:18:33,567 --> 00:18:35,684
Uh, I... I just had
a few more questions.
315
00:18:35,729 --> 00:18:37,817
- About my body?
- About our baby.
316
00:18:38,266 --> 00:18:39,762
Next time, ask them in front of me.
317
00:18:40,001 --> 00:18:42,062
I know how to take care of myself
318
00:18:42,506 --> 00:18:44,473
and this baby, Ash.
319
00:18:49,522 --> 00:18:50,979
Here we go.
320
00:18:52,611 --> 00:18:53,815
Uh...
321
00:18:54,080 --> 00:18:55,123
OK...
322
00:18:55,162 --> 00:18:57,156
Did you leave any food for anyone else?
323
00:18:57,177 --> 00:19:00,002
Yup, but I figured as long
as your mouth is chewing,
324
00:19:00,020 --> 00:19:01,962
it can't be drinking.
325
00:19:02,378 --> 00:19:04,139
That's one way to approach it.
326
00:19:05,718 --> 00:19:07,220
I still feel like...
327
00:19:07,822 --> 00:19:10,340
There's a lot that's been
left unsaid between us
328
00:19:10,398 --> 00:19:11,939
since my breakup with Spencer.
329
00:19:11,997 --> 00:19:13,764
Yeah, but we ain't
gotta get into that now.
330
00:19:13,771 --> 00:19:15,389
Actually, um...
331
00:19:15,888 --> 00:19:19,428
It's important for both my
grief and my sobriety to honestly
332
00:19:19,454 --> 00:19:21,389
speak up about what I'm feeling, so...
333
00:19:21,480 --> 00:19:23,222
Well, in that case,
334
00:19:23,283 --> 00:19:24,607
go for it.
335
00:19:25,099 --> 00:19:26,569
Full disclosure...
336
00:19:28,854 --> 00:19:30,556
I used to be jealous
337
00:19:30,770 --> 00:19:32,861
of what you and Spencer had.
338
00:19:33,075 --> 00:19:35,684
You were his best
friend at South Crenshaw
339
00:19:35,723 --> 00:19:37,845
and I was his best friend at Beverly,
340
00:19:38,150 --> 00:19:41,601
but truthfully, I mean, there
was... there was no comparison.
341
00:19:42,130 --> 00:19:45,444
I mean, what you and Spencer
had and still have is...
342
00:19:46,415 --> 00:19:50,681
An unconditional love that
most people can only dream of.
343
00:19:51,082 --> 00:19:52,759
It's seen Spencer through some of
344
00:19:52,830 --> 00:19:54,461
the toughest times in his life.
345
00:19:54,520 --> 00:19:56,409
And as someone who loves him,
346
00:19:56,869 --> 00:19:59,549
your loyalty to him is
something that I'm grateful for.
347
00:20:00,157 --> 00:20:04,281
Well, since we're being
all honest and stuff,
348
00:20:04,456 --> 00:20:05,874
I actually was...
349
00:20:06,022 --> 00:20:09,887
I was scared when you two
started dating that I'd lose him.
350
00:20:09,952 --> 00:20:11,778
That there'd be no room for me.
351
00:20:12,477 --> 00:20:14,074
But you made sure there was.
352
00:20:14,174 --> 00:20:15,617
I don't think...
353
00:20:16,456 --> 00:20:18,148
I don't think I ever said thank you.
354
00:20:19,727 --> 00:20:21,321
I learned that from my dad.
355
00:20:21,909 --> 00:20:23,383
He always made room in his heart
356
00:20:23,383 --> 00:20:25,475
for whoever walked
through our front door.
357
00:20:25,689 --> 00:20:28,576
It never took anything away
from what he felt for us.
358
00:20:28,777 --> 00:20:30,822
You know, he just made the extra room.
359
00:20:30,899 --> 00:20:32,524
That's such a beautiful thing.
360
00:20:32,582 --> 00:20:35,651
Plus, um, confession number two?
361
00:20:36,091 --> 00:20:38,538
I made room for you for selfish reasons
362
00:20:38,641 --> 00:20:41,037
'cause I wanted some of
that Coop magic in my life.
363
00:20:41,360 --> 00:20:43,684
Come on, man.
364
00:20:44,137 --> 00:20:46,707
And look at us now.
We're not just friends.
365
00:20:46,875 --> 00:20:49,348
We're roommates, sobriety partners,
366
00:20:49,484 --> 00:20:50,571
family.
367
00:20:50,616 --> 00:20:52,150
I missed you, Liv.
368
00:20:52,746 --> 00:20:54,202
I've missed our friendship.
369
00:20:54,299 --> 00:20:55,717
Me, too.
370
00:21:06,779 --> 00:21:08,048
Hey.
371
00:21:08,701 --> 00:21:10,009
How was your day?
372
00:21:10,799 --> 00:21:12,301
Good. You really been
here this whole time?
373
00:21:12,333 --> 00:21:14,374
No, I left but I came back
374
00:21:14,400 --> 00:21:16,057
and Jaymee and Asher,
you know, let me in.
375
00:21:16,109 --> 00:21:17,430
OK, look, um,
376
00:21:17,437 --> 00:21:19,274
as much as I appreciate all this,
377
00:21:19,439 --> 00:21:21,249
you really don't gotta
fold my laundry, OK?
378
00:21:21,262 --> 00:21:24,382
Wait. I don't mind, OK?
Plus, it's no big deal.
379
00:21:26,149 --> 00:21:28,589
Hey, how about we watch a movie,
380
00:21:28,596 --> 00:21:30,473
- snack on some cold hot cakes?
- Sure.
381
00:21:30,758 --> 00:21:32,254
- Movie sounds great.
- OK.
382
00:21:32,338 --> 00:21:33,840
But we warming up those hot cakes, OK?
383
00:21:33,853 --> 00:21:35,892
OK. OK.
384
00:21:37,335 --> 00:21:39,077
Uh, hey.
385
00:21:39,116 --> 00:21:41,006
Is, uh, Asher around?
386
00:21:41,078 --> 00:21:42,495
He's not here.
387
00:21:42,650 --> 00:21:43,913
Um, it's OK.
388
00:21:44,081 --> 00:21:46,482
- We're a little early anyway, so...
- Early for what?
389
00:21:46,547 --> 00:21:47,751
Asher's shift is up.
390
00:21:47,771 --> 00:21:49,628
He was gonna take Liv
to her A.A. meeting.
391
00:21:49,641 --> 00:21:51,945
I'd do it, but I gotta
make it to another class.
392
00:21:51,984 --> 00:21:53,608
I can wait on the patio.
393
00:21:53,641 --> 00:21:55,525
I'm sure he'll be here any sec.
394
00:21:55,583 --> 00:21:58,082
Actually, he took Jaymee
to a doctor's appointment.
395
00:21:58,101 --> 00:21:59,318
I don't know when he'll be back.
396
00:21:59,351 --> 00:22:01,888
Is she OK? Did her
lupus flare back up or...
397
00:22:01,914 --> 00:22:03,248
I'll do it.
398
00:22:04,912 --> 00:22:06,174
I'll take you.
399
00:22:07,074 --> 00:22:09,449
Are you sure? I don't want to interrupt.
400
00:22:09,449 --> 00:22:10,654
No, you're not.
401
00:22:10,692 --> 00:22:12,291
We was just about to watch a movie,
402
00:22:12,964 --> 00:22:15,761
but from everything I heard
today, sounds like your situation
403
00:22:15,780 --> 00:22:17,243
is a little more life and death
404
00:22:17,857 --> 00:22:19,503
so, um...
405
00:22:20,390 --> 00:22:21,982
- raincheck?
- Yeah.
406
00:22:22,532 --> 00:22:23,995
Of course. Sure.
407
00:22:27,381 --> 00:22:28,565
Thank you.
408
00:22:29,297 --> 00:22:30,501
Both of you.
409
00:22:30,987 --> 00:22:32,062
Mm-hmm.
410
00:22:32,437 --> 00:22:33,753
OK.
411
00:22:36,560 --> 00:22:37,757
OK.
412
00:22:43,610 --> 00:22:45,008
Yo, you good?
413
00:22:45,811 --> 00:22:47,293
Buster got in my way.
414
00:22:47,876 --> 00:22:49,637
You can't be hitting everybody that gets
415
00:22:49,650 --> 00:22:51,191
in your way because you angry.
416
00:22:51,268 --> 00:22:53,275
Look, I know you hurtin'. We all are.
417
00:22:53,301 --> 00:22:55,334
And I can't even imagine what
else you been goin' through
418
00:22:55,372 --> 00:22:57,288
- after being on that bus.
- You wasting my time.
419
00:22:57,301 --> 00:22:59,495
- Can I go now?
- Man, sit your ass down.
420
00:23:06,584 --> 00:23:09,206
Look, I'll never be Coach Baker,
421
00:23:09,517 --> 00:23:11,776
but I'm sure as hell
gonna keep his legacy alive
422
00:23:11,791 --> 00:23:13,957
by looking after his
South Crenshaw kids.
423
00:23:13,983 --> 00:23:15,355
Am I supposed to say thank you?
424
00:23:15,368 --> 00:23:17,012
You ain't gotta say nothing to me.
425
00:23:17,116 --> 00:23:20,482
But you can't let your future
go to waste because you in pain.
426
00:23:20,680 --> 00:23:22,904
Talk to somebody. Anyone.
427
00:23:23,065 --> 00:23:26,813
Or that grief will eat you alive.
428
00:23:34,918 --> 00:23:37,385
You're probably wondering why I
didn't call you over this morning.
429
00:23:37,417 --> 00:23:38,861
You called who you needed.
430
00:23:39,058 --> 00:23:42,261
No, I called who I didn't
think I'd be burdening.
431
00:23:45,238 --> 00:23:47,626
You've saved my life
enough times, Spencer.
432
00:23:48,209 --> 00:23:51,161
It didn't feel fair to lay this
at your feet too after everything.
433
00:23:51,796 --> 00:23:53,447
That night at the hospital,
434
00:23:53,861 --> 00:23:55,550
after I got shot,
435
00:23:55,680 --> 00:23:57,700
you thanked me for saving your life.
436
00:23:57,712 --> 00:23:59,131
You remember what I said?
437
00:24:00,432 --> 00:24:03,108
- You said anytime.
- And I meant it.
438
00:24:08,358 --> 00:24:11,169
- So how bad's it been?
- Last night was the worst of it.
439
00:24:11,597 --> 00:24:14,063
That's why I'm searching
for clarity today.
440
00:24:15,157 --> 00:24:17,177
I miss him so much.
441
00:24:17,598 --> 00:24:18,821
I know.
442
00:24:24,996 --> 00:24:26,479
Oh, my God.
443
00:24:26,751 --> 00:24:29,068
My dad used to love pop up carnivals.
444
00:24:30,710 --> 00:24:33,018
I called them deathtraps in the making
445
00:24:33,043 --> 00:24:35,815
but he always used to say they were like
446
00:24:36,119 --> 00:24:38,217
roses that bloom in concrete...
447
00:24:39,291 --> 00:24:41,104
a beautiful surprise.
448
00:24:45,337 --> 00:24:46,522
What are you doing?
449
00:24:46,574 --> 00:24:48,787
We got 45 minutes before
your meeting, right?
450
00:24:50,049 --> 00:24:51,292
Trust me.
451
00:24:56,432 --> 00:24:58,097
Whoo!
452
00:25:00,769 --> 00:25:02,135
You're not serious.
453
00:25:02,167 --> 00:25:04,096
Yeah, you wanted clarity, right?
454
00:25:04,627 --> 00:25:07,690
It doesn't get quieter
or more zen than up there.
455
00:25:07,877 --> 00:25:10,370
Carnivals were your pop's thing,
456
00:25:10,686 --> 00:25:13,789
so you already got a connection
to him here. Just try it.
457
00:25:15,779 --> 00:25:18,418
It's the closest to heaven we're
gonna get from where we are.
458
00:25:19,324 --> 00:25:21,381
Can we just take a second?
459
00:25:21,613 --> 00:25:23,871
I don't know. Maybe play
some games or something first?
460
00:25:23,923 --> 00:25:26,242
- Liv.
- I'll go up.
461
00:25:26,630 --> 00:25:28,128
I will.
462
00:25:28,459 --> 00:25:30,189
I'm just...
463
00:25:30,644 --> 00:25:32,452
I'm... I'm not ready yet.
464
00:25:36,358 --> 00:25:38,291
How about the basketball toss?
465
00:25:38,825 --> 00:25:41,261
Last time I went up against
you, you whooped my ass.
466
00:25:41,286 --> 00:25:43,236
Sounds like you're scared
to get your ass beat again.
467
00:25:43,268 --> 00:25:45,242
OK. All right. Let's go.
468
00:25:45,274 --> 00:25:46,997
Game on, woman.
469
00:25:51,723 --> 00:25:53,706
- It's impossible.
- It's not impossible.
470
00:25:53,722 --> 00:25:55,446
- You gotta believe.
- You gotta just...
471
00:25:56,069 --> 00:25:57,720
It works.
472
00:26:08,668 --> 00:26:11,370
Chill out. Chill out.
473
00:26:15,172 --> 00:26:16,556
Whoo!
474
00:26:16,791 --> 00:26:18,442
Ahh!
475
00:26:18,474 --> 00:26:20,473
OK. Somebody get me a football.
476
00:26:23,572 --> 00:26:25,118
I feel like I was hustled.
477
00:26:27,667 --> 00:26:29,748
- You ready?
- No.
478
00:26:31,392 --> 00:26:33,191
But I'm gonna do it anyway.
479
00:26:53,012 --> 00:26:54,494
OK.
480
00:26:55,245 --> 00:26:56,596
I'm up here.
481
00:26:57,776 --> 00:26:59,304
Close your eyes.
482
00:27:00,780 --> 00:27:02,341
Take in the quiet.
483
00:27:11,430 --> 00:27:12,886
Wow.
484
00:27:15,210 --> 00:27:17,196
It's like I'm in the clouds.
485
00:27:21,042 --> 00:27:24,175
This is the closest I've felt
to him since he's been gone.
486
00:27:26,072 --> 00:27:29,792
You wanted clarity on why his
loss was pushing you to drink.
487
00:27:31,971 --> 00:27:33,873
Talk to him...
488
00:27:35,084 --> 00:27:36,411
In here.
489
00:27:39,502 --> 00:27:41,962
Only you and him can figure this out.
490
00:28:31,756 --> 00:28:34,125
- Spices and frozen meat?
- Hmm.
491
00:28:34,229 --> 00:28:36,281
- Ooh, the meat is a little thawed.
- Oh.
492
00:28:36,294 --> 00:28:38,365
Mm. I am grateful
493
00:28:38,378 --> 00:28:40,274
you didn't keep that
package sealed forever,
494
00:28:40,533 --> 00:28:41,970
'cause that smell would've divided us.
495
00:28:42,009 --> 00:28:43,298
- OK. Really?
- Yeah.
496
00:28:43,356 --> 00:28:45,460
But what is... what is
all this... all this for?
497
00:28:45,681 --> 00:28:48,381
- Oh. Louisiana night.
- What?
498
00:28:48,497 --> 00:28:51,158
Well, I saw a flyer on the
table at your parents' house.
499
00:28:51,190 --> 00:28:53,436
South Crenshaw's hosting a
"Louisiana night" next week.
500
00:28:54,549 --> 00:28:57,663
My dad must've been making my
grandma Mary's jumpin' jambalaya.
501
00:28:57,702 --> 00:28:59,968
He always said he perfected the recipe
502
00:28:59,981 --> 00:29:02,091
with his secret ingredient.
503
00:29:02,117 --> 00:29:03,690
- What is it?
- Whoa!
504
00:29:04,117 --> 00:29:05,864
- A secret.
- OK.
505
00:29:05,890 --> 00:29:08,428
But now I remember why it's
called "jumpin' jambalaya."
506
00:29:08,466 --> 00:29:11,204
Mm. Well, I mean, we
can't let this go to waste,
507
00:29:11,372 --> 00:29:15,185
so I say we end the day
the same way we started it.
508
00:29:15,645 --> 00:29:16,901
All together.
509
00:29:17,031 --> 00:29:20,539
Family dinner, making
your dad's jambalaya, yeah?
510
00:29:20,565 --> 00:29:21,749
- I say let's do it.
- OK.
511
00:29:21,761 --> 00:29:22,947
Yeah.
512
00:29:23,892 --> 00:29:25,204
Can I get you anything?
513
00:29:27,005 --> 00:29:28,378
I'm fine...
514
00:29:30,358 --> 00:29:31,990
But you can tell me
what's going on with you.
515
00:29:32,191 --> 00:29:34,910
You couldn't even enjoy hearing
your baby's heartbeat today.
516
00:29:35,726 --> 00:29:38,030
Why are you so freaked out
about the baby all of a sudden?
517
00:29:38,594 --> 00:29:40,386
It's not the baby that
has me freaked out.
518
00:29:41,525 --> 00:29:42,982
It's the bus crash.
519
00:29:45,319 --> 00:29:47,688
One minute everything is
fine and then the next...
520
00:29:49,488 --> 00:29:52,748
We're on the side of a
cliff and Coach is dead.
521
00:29:55,072 --> 00:29:57,078
I learned the hard way
that nothing is promised
522
00:29:57,098 --> 00:29:58,703
and now I can't stop thinking about
523
00:29:58,736 --> 00:30:01,130
something bad happening
to you or the baby.
524
00:30:01,687 --> 00:30:03,118
You both are my whole world.
525
00:30:03,144 --> 00:30:05,235
You're our whole world, too.
526
00:30:06,257 --> 00:30:09,145
And you're right. Nothing is promised.
527
00:30:09,909 --> 00:30:12,227
That's why we have to live in the now.
528
00:30:12,700 --> 00:30:15,580
Find joy in the now.
529
00:30:16,616 --> 00:30:18,718
Have you thought about
talking to someone?
530
00:30:19,601 --> 00:30:20,999
I'm talking to you.
531
00:30:21,595 --> 00:30:24,985
I mean someone that can
help you deal with your PTSD.
532
00:30:25,486 --> 00:30:27,341
Someone that can help
you start believing
533
00:30:27,386 --> 00:30:30,053
that you deserve all of the
good things in your life.
534
00:30:30,875 --> 00:30:32,648
Yeah, maybe you're right.
535
00:30:38,818 --> 00:30:40,539
Asher, it's fine.
536
00:30:40,921 --> 00:30:43,214
Really. I got to my A.A. meeting.
537
00:30:43,926 --> 00:30:47,039
Jordan's already here
to pick me up. I promise.
538
00:30:47,460 --> 00:30:49,330
I'll see you guys back
at the house later.
539
00:30:49,729 --> 00:30:52,043
So, what was that?
540
00:30:52,450 --> 00:30:55,297
- Apology number 9 or...
- Yeah, something like that.
541
00:30:56,552 --> 00:30:57,996
Thanks for coming to get me.
542
00:30:58,028 --> 00:31:00,100
Been looking forward
to my shift all day.
543
00:31:00,656 --> 00:31:02,035
How was A.A.?
544
00:31:02,631 --> 00:31:04,398
Everything I needed.
545
00:31:08,391 --> 00:31:10,169
All of today was.
546
00:31:10,418 --> 00:31:11,661
I'm proud of you.
547
00:31:11,680 --> 00:31:14,017
You know, for the first time today,
548
00:31:14,962 --> 00:31:17,824
I can honestly say I'm
really proud of myself, too.
549
00:31:21,837 --> 00:31:23,656
I think I found my why.
550
00:31:24,161 --> 00:31:26,083
It's the silence.
551
00:31:27,818 --> 00:31:31,113
And not, you know, just,
like, the quiet, but
552
00:31:31,553 --> 00:31:35,437
the silence in things left unsaid.
553
00:31:37,793 --> 00:31:39,852
Silence in friendship,
554
00:31:40,667 --> 00:31:43,465
relationship, and...
555
00:31:45,342 --> 00:31:47,789
Especially the silence of death.
556
00:31:50,074 --> 00:31:52,716
Silence is the hardest
thing for me to face.
557
00:31:54,367 --> 00:31:58,412
And I think I finally realised
that up on that ferris wheel.
558
00:32:00,762 --> 00:32:02,516
And yet you're facing it.
559
00:32:06,433 --> 00:32:08,446
What about others, you know?
560
00:32:09,754 --> 00:32:11,630
People like me who are...
561
00:32:12,007 --> 00:32:15,866
Equally scared of the silence, but
don't have a village to turn to?
562
00:32:21,045 --> 00:32:24,378
- What?
- I know that look.
563
00:32:24,514 --> 00:32:26,210
- What look?
- The look that Dad
564
00:32:26,225 --> 00:32:28,495
always said meant you
were about to do something
565
00:32:28,527 --> 00:32:30,631
that would change the world for good.
566
00:32:32,878 --> 00:32:35,240
All right. Let's go home.
567
00:32:45,973 --> 00:32:47,507
Am I doing this right?
568
00:32:47,585 --> 00:32:48,925
Mom, it's just rice.
569
00:32:48,957 --> 00:32:50,563
It's really hard to mess up.
570
00:32:50,718 --> 00:32:51,949
You'd be surprised.
571
00:32:51,974 --> 00:32:54,564
The one time your dad asked me to help,
572
00:32:54,610 --> 00:32:56,772
let's just say I was never asked back.
573
00:32:56,817 --> 00:32:58,622
Do you guys remember the time
574
00:32:58,667 --> 00:33:00,545
that Dad threw out the entire pot
575
00:33:00,577 --> 00:33:02,907
because Liv used vegetable stock
576
00:33:02,933 --> 00:33:04,487
- instead of chicken stock?
- Mm-hmm.
577
00:33:04,506 --> 00:33:07,147
It wasn't my fault. He
bought the wrong thing.
578
00:33:07,302 --> 00:33:09,374
Asher, you sure you know
579
00:33:09,413 --> 00:33:11,147
- what you're doing over there, bruh?
- Green peppers...
580
00:33:11,257 --> 00:33:12,889
Hi.
581
00:33:13,064 --> 00:33:14,274
Hi.
582
00:33:14,655 --> 00:33:16,757
- My dad would've loved this.
- Hmm.
583
00:33:17,142 --> 00:33:20,042
Kitchen full of his family and
friends, cooking his favourite meal.
584
00:33:20,100 --> 00:33:23,084
- He'd probably even use my mom's rice, which is...
- Wow.
585
00:33:23,143 --> 00:33:24,515
So thank you.
586
00:33:24,742 --> 00:33:26,541
Why? I didn't do anything.
587
00:33:26,631 --> 00:33:29,662
This has been the worst
couple weeks of my life
588
00:33:29,710 --> 00:33:32,821
and every step of the way, you've
known exactly what I needed.
589
00:33:33,908 --> 00:33:35,954
I'm so grateful to have you.
590
00:33:36,276 --> 00:33:37,572
Ahem.
591
00:33:39,786 --> 00:33:41,741
I guess this is your coming out dinner.
592
00:33:43,573 --> 00:33:45,105
Huh.
593
00:33:45,256 --> 00:33:47,036
- I guess so.
- Ooh, OK. Enough.
594
00:33:47,062 --> 00:33:49,509
You guys are making me lose
my appetite with all this sap.
595
00:33:49,541 --> 00:33:52,163
For real. You two need
to get a room, like, asap.
596
00:33:52,195 --> 00:33:54,649
Bro, they already got a room,
and I share a wall with 'em.
597
00:33:54,655 --> 00:33:57,289
- OK! Thank you.
- Oh, wow.
598
00:33:57,328 --> 00:33:59,768
Can we get back to cooking, please?
599
00:33:59,826 --> 00:34:01,425
- Yes.
- I'm hungry.
600
00:34:01,464 --> 00:34:03,101
- Yeah.
- What I was gonna say was that...
601
00:34:03,127 --> 00:34:06,144
- No, chill out.
- Oh, no. That's OK.
602
00:34:11,848 --> 00:34:14,962
So...
603
00:34:15,285 --> 00:34:19,408
In my quest to embrace
full honesty today, um...
604
00:34:20,780 --> 00:34:24,005
I guess we should talk about
what I said a couple weeks ago.
605
00:34:24,186 --> 00:34:26,038
Before your life turned upside down.
606
00:34:26,167 --> 00:34:27,992
Yours turned upside down, too.
607
00:34:30,771 --> 00:34:33,275
You know, I've always admired
you for how brave you are.
608
00:34:33,676 --> 00:34:35,995
Telling me you wanted me
back couldn't have been easy.
609
00:34:36,694 --> 00:34:40,085
And we owe each other an honest
conversation about what we feel
610
00:34:40,720 --> 00:34:43,588
and where we stand, but...
611
00:34:44,319 --> 00:34:46,728
I want to have it when
we're clear-headed.
612
00:34:46,786 --> 00:34:48,960
- Mm.
- When the battle for your sobriety
613
00:34:48,986 --> 00:34:51,109
ain't at defcon four and I ain't...
614
00:34:53,673 --> 00:34:55,201
What were you gonna say?
615
00:34:57,804 --> 00:34:59,972
Spencer,
616
00:35:00,244 --> 00:35:01,850
my dad was like a dad to you.
617
00:35:01,876 --> 00:35:04,445
It's all good. It's
all good. I'm just...
618
00:35:06,018 --> 00:35:08,019
I'm just glad I could
be there for you today.
619
00:35:09,729 --> 00:35:12,914
And, uh, and we'll have that
conversation when the time's right.
620
00:35:15,056 --> 00:35:16,435
That's a promise.
621
00:35:24,093 --> 00:35:25,446
What's all this?
622
00:35:26,903 --> 00:35:28,903
I think I'm gonna bring
back "Live the Truth."
623
00:35:29,830 --> 00:35:33,173
Um, I have some things
I want to say to you guys
624
00:35:33,564 --> 00:35:36,877
and anyone else who needs to hear it.
625
00:35:47,583 --> 00:35:49,700
The bond between a
father and a daughter...
626
00:35:52,212 --> 00:35:54,128
There's absolutely nothing like it.
627
00:35:55,095 --> 00:35:58,938
I always used to say my
mom gave me my drive but...
628
00:36:00,123 --> 00:36:02,446
my dad gave me my dreams.
629
00:36:02,919 --> 00:36:05,546
You know, as little
girls, we dream of all
630
00:36:05,586 --> 00:36:08,052
the big life moments we're
gonna share with our dads.
631
00:36:08,919 --> 00:36:11,024
The problem is, while we're dreaming
632
00:36:11,030 --> 00:36:13,522
those big dreams of life with our hero,
633
00:36:14,261 --> 00:36:17,387
no one ever warns us
that those same dreams
634
00:36:17,397 --> 00:36:20,443
can be cut short. That we could just...
635
00:36:21,686 --> 00:36:24,262
Wake up one day and our dads just be...
636
00:36:26,132 --> 00:36:27,525
Gone.
637
00:36:28,554 --> 00:36:31,207
The silence from that loss is, uh,
638
00:36:31,411 --> 00:36:33,104
deafening.
639
00:36:34,014 --> 00:36:36,116
And the desire to run from it...
640
00:36:36,950 --> 00:36:39,880
It's overwhelming.
641
00:36:40,096 --> 00:36:41,817
But I'm here to tell you,
642
00:36:42,222 --> 00:36:43,986
don't run.
643
00:36:44,224 --> 00:36:46,086
Gather your village.
644
00:36:46,186 --> 00:36:47,870
Face the silence...
645
00:36:50,213 --> 00:36:52,291
And whatever feelings come with it.
646
00:36:55,277 --> 00:36:57,626
It can be feelings of abandonment,
647
00:36:58,118 --> 00:36:59,788
feelings of fear.
648
00:37:05,718 --> 00:37:07,893
"I don't want you to
feel pressured by me,
649
00:37:08,035 --> 00:37:09,984
so I'm gonna take a step back.
650
00:37:10,436 --> 00:37:13,609
If you need me, you
know where to find me."
651
00:37:23,507 --> 00:37:25,300
Now's not a good time, Coach.
652
00:37:26,032 --> 00:37:27,844
Just came to check on you.
653
00:37:27,973 --> 00:37:29,805
Our conversation earlier,
654
00:37:29,896 --> 00:37:32,174
it went in a direction
that I didn't expect.
655
00:37:32,200 --> 00:37:35,230
OK, OK, so now you checked. I'm good.
656
00:37:35,275 --> 00:37:37,858
- I'm here for you, son.
- I love you, son.
657
00:37:37,910 --> 00:37:39,612
I do consider you my son.
658
00:37:39,632 --> 00:37:41,632
- I just want you to know...
- Don't call me son.
659
00:37:42,843 --> 00:37:45,265
I don't need a daddy, man.
660
00:37:45,969 --> 00:37:48,714
I don't need a mentor or even a friend.
661
00:37:48,999 --> 00:37:51,569
- Spence, I...
- I need a damn coach.
662
00:37:51,666 --> 00:37:53,038
That is it.
663
00:37:53,756 --> 00:37:56,229
Somebody who's gonna do
whatever it takes to win
664
00:37:56,274 --> 00:37:58,002
and get me to the NFL.
665
00:37:58,022 --> 00:38:02,113
That is all I can count on
and that negro ain't you!
666
00:38:03,777 --> 00:38:06,735
I shoulda listened to those
coaches at TNT and Toledo.
667
00:38:07,147 --> 00:38:09,532
All they cared about was the game.
668
00:38:09,888 --> 00:38:12,257
I'm done wasting my time with you, man,
669
00:38:12,626 --> 00:38:14,542
and GAU football.
670
00:38:15,785 --> 00:38:17,909
So consider this my official notice.
671
00:38:19,534 --> 00:38:21,191
I'm entering the portal.
672
00:38:21,657 --> 00:38:23,722
Sometimes, it feels like anger.
673
00:38:24,427 --> 00:38:26,202
And that was my epiphany today.
674
00:38:27,639 --> 00:38:30,177
I'm angry at my dad for dying.
675
00:38:30,662 --> 00:38:32,857
And hiding from that
truth almost cost me
676
00:38:32,870 --> 00:38:34,805
my sanity and my sobriety.
677
00:38:36,644 --> 00:38:39,829
So now I'm speaking my truth
out loud not just for me,
678
00:38:40,580 --> 00:38:43,964
but for anyone else who's
going through something similar.
679
00:38:44,250 --> 00:38:48,070
- Sorry, Mrs. Baker. I was just...
- No, no, it's OK, it's OK.
680
00:38:48,439 --> 00:38:49,935
Preach told me you were here.
681
00:38:50,686 --> 00:38:52,563
Please, stay.
682
00:39:06,876 --> 00:39:08,908
The silence is loud, isn't it?
683
00:39:11,588 --> 00:39:14,741
Leaves a lot of room for your
mind to play tricks on you
684
00:39:14,775 --> 00:39:16,592
if you don't face it head on.
685
00:39:16,871 --> 00:39:18,165
It don't matter.
686
00:39:18,780 --> 00:39:21,694
- I don't matter.
- Yes, you do matter.
687
00:39:21,817 --> 00:39:24,600
That's why my husband went back for you.
688
00:39:24,853 --> 00:39:28,077
You can't keep carrying
all this guilt, Jabari.
689
00:39:28,329 --> 00:39:30,660
It's not what Billy would have wanted.
690
00:39:32,472 --> 00:39:33,974
Tell me...
691
00:39:35,715 --> 00:39:37,587
What happened when...
692
00:39:38,344 --> 00:39:40,435
When Billy went back on the bus.
693
00:39:41,206 --> 00:39:42,542
No.
694
00:39:43,420 --> 00:39:44,745
No, I'm sorry.
695
00:39:45,233 --> 00:39:47,507
I... I've already
caused you enough pain.
696
00:39:48,185 --> 00:39:49,615
And you don't want to hear that.
697
00:39:49,654 --> 00:39:51,822
No. I don't.
698
00:39:53,013 --> 00:39:54,729
But I need to.
699
00:39:55,777 --> 00:39:57,027
And you need...
700
00:39:57,629 --> 00:39:59,027
To release it.
701
00:40:03,008 --> 00:40:05,073
Jabari!
702
00:40:05,721 --> 00:40:07,152
Jabari!
703
00:40:07,281 --> 00:40:09,915
All right, take my
hand. All right, come on.
704
00:40:09,948 --> 00:40:12,168
All right, use this leg.
705
00:40:12,214 --> 00:40:15,516
There we go. OK.
706
00:40:15,555 --> 00:40:17,419
All right, you good?
707
00:40:17,490 --> 00:40:18,927
All right. What do you say
708
00:40:19,283 --> 00:40:20,895
we get off this damn bus?
709
00:40:22,122 --> 00:40:23,835
Oh! Whoa! Whoa.
710
00:40:23,887 --> 00:40:26,049
OK, this is gonna be fun. OK.
711
00:40:26,547 --> 00:40:28,457
All right. We got this. Um,
712
00:40:28,528 --> 00:40:30,781
we're just gonna go
one at a time, right?
713
00:40:31,299 --> 00:40:33,526
Gonna be easy. One at
a time. You go first.
714
00:40:33,985 --> 00:40:35,474
You go first. One at a time.
715
00:40:35,545 --> 00:40:37,721
You got it. I'm right
behind you, Jabary.
716
00:40:37,746 --> 00:40:39,598
There we go. My man.
717
00:40:39,682 --> 00:40:43,183
Ah! All right, Coach.
Come on. It's your turn.
718
00:40:45,818 --> 00:40:49,333
Tell my family that I love them.
719
00:40:52,078 --> 00:40:54,836
Coach!
720
00:40:59,549 --> 00:41:01,847
There's nothing you
could have done, Jabari.
721
00:41:05,070 --> 00:41:06,446
Look at me.
722
00:41:09,142 --> 00:41:10,760
There is nothing
723
00:41:11,595 --> 00:41:14,262
that you could have done.
724
00:41:17,090 --> 00:41:19,052
For whoever is out there listening,
725
00:41:19,965 --> 00:41:21,383
I need you to know
726
00:41:22,192 --> 00:41:24,289
that you aren't alone in your grief.
727
00:41:26,762 --> 00:41:28,885
And if you don't have anyone to turn to,
728
00:41:29,749 --> 00:41:31,481
I will be here for you.
729
00:41:34,400 --> 00:41:36,601
Because when you can't hold yourself up,
730
00:41:37,688 --> 00:41:41,851
it's lifesaving to have a
village that'll do that for you.
731
00:41:55,693 --> 00:42:00,141
- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -
732
00:42:15,235 --> 00:42:17,237
Greg, move your head.
54465
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