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[ "Valse de l'Empereur"
by Johann Strauss playing]
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[♪♪]
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[♪♪]
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[♪♪]
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[♪♪]
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"The President could sense
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the arrival of
his Chief of Staff
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from the slight breeze the
door makes when opened,
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and the President
wished he would knock,
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and the Chief of Staff thought,
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"I'm not the kind of guy
who knocks and waits,"
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and the President thinks,
"I wish he would wait,"
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but the Chief of
Staff ignores this...
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[Hank, thinking] Cheese...
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American and feta.
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Tuna.
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Vodka for my office.
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Olives.
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Dried berries...
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Uh, let's stop you there.
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Any comments?
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I loved it.
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[Hank] That's
one "I loved it."
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How about any
constructive criticisms?
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Going once, twice...
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Moving on.
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I mean, you could...
You could say something.
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I've given you my
thoughts before.
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Just have a glance
at your last story
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or the one before that, okay?
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Jen, do you want to read?
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It might spark some discussion
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if you offered
something out loud.
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I don't think so.
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It could.
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[grumbles]
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Could you, please, just
for once, say something?
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Workshops like this are based
on the idea of peer review.
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Guided review.
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I'm trying to guide.
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00:02:01,440 --> 00:02:03,070
Jen?
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00:02:03,095 --> 00:02:05,949
Professor, I don't
mean to gang up on you,
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but you should know,
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besides calling
our names to read,
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you've barely said anything
in an hour and a half.
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Well, I couldn't help but notice
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a wandering point of view
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within, basically,
structureless sentences.
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No, my point of
view doesn't wander.
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Well, it switches mid-sentence
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from the President to
the Chief of Staff,
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then back, then back...
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Yeah, on purpose.
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Well, you risk
distancing the reader.
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I happen to think that
risk is worth the reward.
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What's the reward?
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Okay, um...
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the reward is I'm...
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I'm exposing the flow
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of different collected
consciousness.
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You know?
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I'm calling it
ultra-omniscience.
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That's a cool word.
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Did anyone else care
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that the President
and Chief of Staff
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seem to be responding
to each other's thoughts
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without speaking,
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00:03:01,630 --> 00:03:02,960
in a way that isn't...
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00:03:03,160 --> 00:03:04,310
possible?
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00:03:04,510 --> 00:03:05,910
I mean, I'm just
gonna say it again,
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I loved it,
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and you made my shortlist
for the Pulitzer.
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You don't get to
make a short list
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for someone else's award.
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00:03:12,560 --> 00:03:13,560
Yeah, look, okay,
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responding to each
other's thoughts,
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it's not a mistake.
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[Hank] It certainly was.
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Let's put aside the
multiple points of view
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and the wandering tense
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and the conversations
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that seem to happen
via telepathy.
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Even put aside
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the Chief of
Staff's necrophilia.
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Okay, well, then
there's no story.
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Do you know what I mean
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when I say "distance
the reader"?
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Of course I do,
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but that's my choice to make,
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as it is every writer's,
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as it was, um, Chaucer's
choice, you know,
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whose writing I actually
find really distancing.
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Yeah, well, less so
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because he was writing
in Middle English,
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and it's a tricky thing,
comparing yourself to Chaucer.
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Yeah, but we don't know that
I'm not the next Chaucer.
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We do know.
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All due respect,
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you would not know.
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All due respect,
a cat would know.
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Your only novel
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isn't even available at
your own campus bookstore.
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You... you're here.
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You're here.
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00:04:00,475 --> 00:04:02,710
The main piece of evidence
is that you are here.
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00:04:02,910 --> 00:04:04,060
The fact that you're here
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00:04:04,110 --> 00:04:05,976
means you didn't try
very hard in high school,
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or, for whatever reason, you
showed very little promise.
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Did that sound harsh?
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I'll tell you what.
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I'll smile through
the rest of this.
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You are here,
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and even if your presence
at this middling college
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in this sad, forgotten town
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was some bizarre anomaly,
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and you do have the
promise of genius,
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which I'll bet a
kidney that you don't,
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it will never surface.
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I am not a good enough
writer or writing teacher
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to bring it out of you.
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And how do I know that? How?
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Because I, too, am here,
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at Railton College,
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mediocrity's capital.
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Well, you wanted
me to talk more.
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[♪♪]
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[phone buzzing]
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[Lily] Who is it?
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Work.
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[Lily] Turn it off.
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[phone buzzing]
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Hmm.
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00:06:13,525 --> 00:06:15,156
I put that in the
recycling three days ago.
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00:06:15,180 --> 00:06:16,620
I didn't realize
you want to save it.
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00:06:16,645 --> 00:06:17,479
Save it?
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00:06:17,504 --> 00:06:21,340
Oh, no, there's other articles
I want to read in here.
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00:06:23,110 --> 00:06:24,550
Um...
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you were working
late last night?
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00:06:26,230 --> 00:06:28,595
I mean, it isn't
really working late
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00:06:28,620 --> 00:06:30,380
just because it's after
you've gone to sleep.
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00:06:31,110 --> 00:06:32,776
Yeah, well, I'm a
college professor,
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00:06:32,800 --> 00:06:35,349
so working after
4:00 p.m. is late.
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Who are you saving now?
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00:06:37,680 --> 00:06:40,130
There's this boy named
Calvin who's been acting out.
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00:06:40,155 --> 00:06:41,616
Herb thinks he
should be expelled,
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00:06:41,640 --> 00:06:42,790
so, anyway,
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we're meeting with his
mother and a teacher...
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[phone buzzing]
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You are very popular
this morning.
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I am.
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00:06:52,450 --> 00:06:54,410
Why did you buy so many bananas?
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They're going to
go bad, you know.
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Just to piss you off.
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[phone buzzing]
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00:07:03,825 --> 00:07:06,206
I think you should just keep
up with the solitary misery,
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00:07:06,230 --> 00:07:08,110
and, like, don't change a thing.
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00:07:09,670 --> 00:07:11,075
Who isn't miserable, huh?
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00:07:11,100 --> 00:07:13,724
Being an adult is 80% misery.
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00:07:13,749 --> 00:07:15,459
No, I think you're at 80.
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00:07:15,580 --> 00:07:17,665
The rest of us hover
around 30 to 40.
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Thirty? Nobody is at 30.
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I'm at 30.
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Really?
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Thirty?
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00:07:23,780 --> 00:07:26,025
Well, then, you're
unusually happy.
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I don't think that's true.
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[Hank, thinking] I
think we've become
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a bit obsessed with happiness.
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00:07:37,950 --> 00:07:39,251
It's a little much.
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00:07:40,035 --> 00:07:42,488
What happened to just
getting through the day?
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I wonder what
percentage of misery
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this dude was at.
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It better have been at least 90.
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I need a cushion.
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00:07:51,445 --> 00:07:53,420
If people wanted to
be happy so much,
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why does all the evidence
point to the opposite?
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00:07:55,450 --> 00:07:57,295
I mean, newspapers, the courts,
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social media...
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00:07:58,535 --> 00:08:00,455
The misery industry...
That's huge.
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00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:01,670
Billions.
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00:08:03,685 --> 00:08:05,345
The happy industry? [chuckles]
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00:08:05,370 --> 00:08:09,570
That's, like, one guy, who
probably lives in Canada,
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00:08:09,624 --> 00:08:10,737
breeding unicorns
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00:08:10,762 --> 00:08:13,302
and filming them for
porn on the side.
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00:08:13,770 --> 00:08:14,770
[students whispering]
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00:08:14,860 --> 00:08:15,860
[chuckles]
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00:08:19,260 --> 00:08:21,368
Mediocrity's capital? Really?
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00:08:21,769 --> 00:08:25,549
[♪♪]
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[♪♪]
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00:08:38,410 --> 00:08:40,380
I decided to face you as a man.
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00:08:41,166 --> 00:08:42,746
Man to man.
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00:08:44,759 --> 00:08:46,139
We're one short.
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00:08:48,647 --> 00:08:50,475
I always wanted to be a writer.
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00:08:52,606 --> 00:08:55,396
When I was six, I
wrote my first story...
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00:08:56,339 --> 00:08:57,789
about Wall Street.
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00:08:57,814 --> 00:09:00,225
That tracks.
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00:09:00,250 --> 00:09:01,515
When I was 12,
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00:09:01,540 --> 00:09:03,417
I wrote my first novel.
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00:09:04,197 --> 00:09:06,436
Whenever I get down
on myself, I read it.
200
00:09:07,353 --> 00:09:09,322
It helps me remember
what I'm meant to do.
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00:09:10,846 --> 00:09:12,709
And that I can't
do anything else.
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00:09:18,800 --> 00:09:20,460
Bartow?
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00:09:21,298 --> 00:09:24,390
I don't think you understand
how hurtful what you said was.
204
00:09:27,460 --> 00:09:30,098
I was uncareful with my words.
205
00:09:32,976 --> 00:09:35,001
I'm sorry, Bartow.
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00:09:38,773 --> 00:09:39,993
We cool?
207
00:09:41,728 --> 00:09:43,494
Yeah, we cool.
208
00:09:44,561 --> 00:09:46,400
I'm just gonna need
that in writing.
209
00:09:46,879 --> 00:09:48,149
What?
210
00:09:48,961 --> 00:09:50,140
Your apology,
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00:09:50,167 --> 00:09:51,357
I'm just gonna need that
212
00:09:51,482 --> 00:09:53,996
to be posted to the school
newspaper's website.
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00:09:54,660 --> 00:09:55,800
With a signature.
214
00:09:56,748 --> 00:09:59,898
Uh, an e-signature is fine, too.
215
00:10:01,996 --> 00:10:04,357
Would you accept
an e-middle finger?
216
00:10:12,380 --> 00:10:13,690
Dean Rose called for you?
217
00:10:13,890 --> 00:10:15,080
- Okay.
- Six times.
218
00:10:15,200 --> 00:10:16,400
Uh-huh.
219
00:10:16,573 --> 00:10:17,777
Should I try him for you?
220
00:10:18,205 --> 00:10:19,511
No.
221
00:10:19,717 --> 00:10:21,455
Did you get me yogurt?
222
00:10:21,480 --> 00:10:23,707
It's not your yogurt day.
223
00:10:24,723 --> 00:10:26,083
Yeah.
224
00:10:26,123 --> 00:10:28,743
[ "Jumping Strings" by
Paolo Andriotti playing]
225
00:10:32,620 --> 00:10:36,270
[♪♪]
226
00:10:46,673 --> 00:10:48,773
[Gracie] Damnit, Rourke,
don't hide behind humor,
227
00:10:48,810 --> 00:10:50,160
as if you could...
228
00:10:50,185 --> 00:10:52,425
[Hank, thinking] Why do
grown-ups bother arguing?
229
00:10:52,450 --> 00:10:53,450
[Paul] Well, I'm smiling.
230
00:10:53,525 --> 00:10:54,675
I have been working...
231
00:10:54,700 --> 00:10:56,060
[Hank, thinking]
Haven't we learned
232
00:10:56,139 --> 00:10:57,473
what the advertising world
figured out long ago,
233
00:10:57,497 --> 00:10:59,655
that, after age 49,
234
00:10:59,680 --> 00:11:02,130
we're not changing our
minds about anything?
235
00:11:02,230 --> 00:11:04,080
So, what's in it for people?
236
00:11:04,132 --> 00:11:05,842
A sexual charge?
237
00:11:06,095 --> 00:11:07,854
Actually, that sounds nice.
238
00:11:07,879 --> 00:11:11,379
That it only finds oxygen
when it's hurting a woman.
239
00:11:11,461 --> 00:11:13,440
It should be painfully
clear to you by now,
240
00:11:13,465 --> 00:11:15,235
your time, sir, it's up.
241
00:11:15,260 --> 00:11:17,195
[Emma] Oh, boy,
we're doing this.
242
00:11:17,220 --> 00:11:19,060
All right, let's
all be careful here.
243
00:11:19,260 --> 00:11:20,625
I'll say anything I want.
244
00:11:20,650 --> 00:11:22,635
I can't be canceled,
I have tenure.
245
00:11:22,660 --> 00:11:24,110
[Gracie] You're an ass.
246
00:11:24,135 --> 00:11:25,310
This is because of you
247
00:11:25,335 --> 00:11:27,030
and your childish
outburst in class.
248
00:11:27,055 --> 00:11:28,095
[Paul] No, no, no, no, no.
249
00:11:28,180 --> 00:11:29,855
It was inspired by him.
250
00:11:29,880 --> 00:11:31,555
It was my idea.
251
00:11:31,580 --> 00:11:32,950
I want recognition.
252
00:11:32,975 --> 00:11:34,386
[speaking in French]
"A partir du moment
253
00:11:34,410 --> 00:11:36,255
ouù l'absurdité est reconnue,
254
00:11:36,280 --> 00:11:37,735
elle devient une passion."
255
00:11:37,760 --> 00:11:38,880
Camus. It means...
256
00:11:38,905 --> 00:11:40,305
Did you not get my email?
257
00:11:40,330 --> 00:11:42,475
I got a lot of
emails this morning.
258
00:11:42,500 --> 00:11:44,565
I'll bet you did, Peckerhead.
259
00:11:44,590 --> 00:11:46,181
- [Gracie] Read your email.
- [Hank] Why?
260
00:11:46,205 --> 00:11:47,915
Rourke submitted a
new course request
261
00:11:47,940 --> 00:11:50,310
to the school website
for public evaluation...
262
00:11:50,336 --> 00:11:53,536
"The Accidental Wisdom of
Mediocre Regional Writers".
263
00:11:53,900 --> 00:11:55,581
He put me on the syllabus!
264
00:11:55,606 --> 00:11:57,399
Are you not regional?
265
00:11:59,036 --> 00:12:01,226
Your choice to insult us all,
266
00:12:01,251 --> 00:12:03,630
especially in an open forum,
267
00:12:03,655 --> 00:12:05,060
it's simply incorrect.
268
00:12:05,085 --> 00:12:06,850
We have no shortage
of worthy scholars
269
00:12:06,909 --> 00:12:08,050
and published authors.
270
00:12:08,090 --> 00:12:09,240
[Hank] Name one.
271
00:12:09,265 --> 00:12:10,025
I'll name two...
272
00:12:10,050 --> 00:12:11,940
Myself...
273
00:12:12,140 --> 00:12:13,403
and perhaps Billie.
274
00:12:14,303 --> 00:12:16,165
My book of sonnets
on Jonathan Swift
275
00:12:16,190 --> 00:12:18,340
has become the benchmark
276
00:12:18,540 --> 00:12:21,170
in early-feminist,
18th-century response poetry.
277
00:12:21,195 --> 00:12:23,085
You are deliberately trying
278
00:12:23,110 --> 00:12:24,761
to invalidate the last
decade of my career.
279
00:12:24,785 --> 00:12:25,960
[Paul] Decade?
280
00:12:25,985 --> 00:12:28,345
That book came out 25 years ago,
281
00:12:28,370 --> 00:12:29,700
and I remember it distinctly,
282
00:12:29,725 --> 00:12:31,830
because the first
email I ever got
283
00:12:32,030 --> 00:12:34,140
was a bill mistakenly sent
from your self-publisher.
284
00:12:34,205 --> 00:12:36,875
Nobody was brave enough
to publish that book.
285
00:12:36,900 --> 00:12:38,225
It was ahead of its time.
286
00:12:38,250 --> 00:12:39,356
Maybe you should have waited.
287
00:12:39,380 --> 00:12:40,380
- You...
- Ow!
288
00:12:40,560 --> 00:12:42,540
Oh, shit! Shit.
289
00:12:42,740 --> 00:12:44,751
Let go of the notebook.
290
00:12:45,230 --> 00:12:47,150
But it has original work in it.
291
00:12:47,175 --> 00:12:48,670
Not if it's yours.
292
00:12:48,699 --> 00:12:49,699
- You...
- Ow!
293
00:12:49,740 --> 00:12:50,740
Oh!
294
00:12:51,800 --> 00:12:53,156
- Ew!
- [Gracie] Oh, god, I'm sorry.
295
00:12:53,180 --> 00:12:54,240
I...
296
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:56,668
I-I...
297
00:12:56,694 --> 00:12:58,380
I-I didn't... I didn't mean to.
298
00:12:58,580 --> 00:12:59,580
I... Are you...?
299
00:12:59,620 --> 00:13:00,950
Going to sue?
300
00:13:00,975 --> 00:13:03,988
Yes! I want every penny from
the sale of those poems.
301
00:13:04,013 --> 00:13:06,773
You can put all of them
in this tiny pocket.
302
00:13:06,863 --> 00:13:09,053
[ "Yulelé" by Eduardo
Mateo playing]
303
00:13:09,320 --> 00:13:12,215
Jill from Jacob Rose's
office called again?
304
00:13:12,240 --> 00:13:13,826
Dean Rose would like
to see you right away?
305
00:13:13,850 --> 00:13:15,350
Tell them I have a class.
306
00:13:15,550 --> 00:13:16,880
I said that?
307
00:13:17,070 --> 00:13:18,530
She said right after class?
308
00:13:18,683 --> 00:13:20,393
Oh. Then I have another class.
309
00:13:20,640 --> 00:13:22,320
Then I said that?
310
00:13:22,359 --> 00:13:23,639
Then she said
311
00:13:23,751 --> 00:13:26,377
that it better not be
racquetball with Tony?
312
00:13:26,918 --> 00:13:28,320
And then I said,
313
00:13:28,345 --> 00:13:29,886
"Have you ever been asked
to cover for your boss
314
00:13:29,910 --> 00:13:30,990
when he was doing something
315
00:13:31,015 --> 00:13:32,645
he didn't want people
to know about?"
316
00:13:32,960 --> 00:13:35,045
Then she got real quiet.
317
00:13:38,466 --> 00:13:39,776
Hey, Daniel.
318
00:13:39,801 --> 00:13:42,171
I hope you brought enough
vape pens for everyone.
319
00:13:42,372 --> 00:13:43,399
[rapid footsteps approaching]
320
00:13:43,423 --> 00:13:44,620
Did you just run?
321
00:13:44,645 --> 00:13:46,149
[exhales]
322
00:13:46,174 --> 00:13:48,256
Are you ready to handle
this Calvin situation?
323
00:13:48,280 --> 00:13:51,070
You shouldn't be so excited
about expelling a kid.
324
00:13:53,740 --> 00:13:55,880
He disrupts my class,
he throws things...
325
00:13:55,913 --> 00:13:57,450
Don't talk about how
disruptive my son is
326
00:13:57,474 --> 00:13:59,615
when it's your job to
control your class.
327
00:13:59,640 --> 00:14:02,239
No. It's my job to teach,
328
00:14:02,290 --> 00:14:03,343
and I can't do my job
329
00:14:03,368 --> 00:14:05,886
if I'm spending 80% of my energy
trying to control her kid...
330
00:14:05,910 --> 00:14:08,110
Do you know that most chocolate
has vegetable oil in it?
331
00:14:08,260 --> 00:14:09,657
Or even animal fat?
332
00:14:10,050 --> 00:14:11,580
Lily, please.
333
00:14:11,605 --> 00:14:12,756
Look, we're here to
talk about Calvin
334
00:14:12,780 --> 00:14:14,591
and what to do at this
important juncture in his life,
335
00:14:14,615 --> 00:14:16,585
but first, just hear me out.
336
00:14:16,610 --> 00:14:19,375
France regulates chocolate.
337
00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:21,810
They don't allow anything
but pure cocoa liquor,
338
00:14:22,010 --> 00:14:24,460
which is what gives chocolate
its rich, delicious flavor.
339
00:14:24,660 --> 00:14:26,380
France, by law,
340
00:14:26,580 --> 00:14:28,990
says that there must
be at least 40%,
341
00:14:29,015 --> 00:14:30,386
but that's not
nearly good enough
342
00:14:30,416 --> 00:14:32,293
for La Maison du Chocolat.
343
00:14:32,860 --> 00:14:35,780
This was flown in
from France last week,
344
00:14:35,805 --> 00:14:37,620
and I'd like to share
some of it with you.
345
00:14:43,456 --> 00:14:45,090
Before you eat it,
346
00:14:45,115 --> 00:14:47,895
I want you to, um,
feel it in your hand.
347
00:14:48,550 --> 00:14:50,423
Just, like, feel
the weight of it.
348
00:14:51,180 --> 00:14:52,750
And then, place
it on your tongue,
349
00:14:52,950 --> 00:14:54,675
and keep it there.
350
00:14:56,469 --> 00:14:58,004
Let it melt in your mouth.
351
00:14:58,620 --> 00:15:00,670
It's amazing, right?
352
00:15:00,711 --> 00:15:02,326
Michelle, you're an
excellent teacher.
353
00:15:02,350 --> 00:15:04,190
And you are clearly a
loving and caring mother.
354
00:15:04,974 --> 00:15:06,986
Look, you want Calvin
expelled from school,
355
00:15:07,010 --> 00:15:08,940
that's not feasible,
356
00:15:08,965 --> 00:15:12,030
but he doesn't have to
take biology this year.
357
00:15:12,463 --> 00:15:14,109
He could make it up
in summer school.
358
00:15:15,600 --> 00:15:17,447
I feel a little manipulated
by this delicious chocolate.
359
00:15:17,471 --> 00:15:18,955
Yeah, I feel the same.
360
00:15:19,926 --> 00:15:21,413
There's common ground.
361
00:15:27,610 --> 00:15:28,880
I liked what you said.
362
00:15:28,905 --> 00:15:30,140
This place sucks.
363
00:15:30,165 --> 00:15:31,654
It should be shut down.
364
00:15:38,139 --> 00:15:39,329
Hey, Jill.
365
00:15:39,610 --> 00:15:41,191
He said he'd like
you to read this,
366
00:15:41,216 --> 00:15:42,638
and then go right in.
367
00:15:45,620 --> 00:15:47,025
Polite note.
368
00:15:47,050 --> 00:15:49,420
May I keep this for my
collection of memorabilia
369
00:15:49,620 --> 00:15:51,770
of times when people
were being polite to me,
370
00:15:51,970 --> 00:15:54,080
only to be setting
a trap of some sort?
371
00:15:54,105 --> 00:15:55,735
I don't think it matters.
372
00:15:55,760 --> 00:15:56,990
Well, nothing matters.
373
00:15:57,063 --> 00:15:58,775
That can't be our standard.
374
00:15:58,800 --> 00:16:00,820
It tells me a lot that
you drove all this way.
375
00:16:00,908 --> 00:16:02,040
I appreciate that.
376
00:16:02,092 --> 00:16:03,092
You take it seriously.
377
00:16:03,240 --> 00:16:04,480
Because, guess what?
378
00:16:04,534 --> 00:16:05,876
I take it seriously, and we
should take it seriously.
379
00:16:05,900 --> 00:16:07,960
Are we upset? You betcha.
380
00:16:07,985 --> 00:16:09,096
But what you have to understand
381
00:16:09,120 --> 00:16:11,485
is that Hank is going through
382
00:16:11,510 --> 00:16:14,535
a rough patch with
his diverticulitis.
383
00:16:14,560 --> 00:16:17,840
Infected and inflamed pouches
bulging from his colon.
384
00:16:18,040 --> 00:16:20,710
Complete bowel Armageddon.
385
00:16:20,910 --> 00:16:23,190
Is it an excuse?
No, of course not.
386
00:16:23,390 --> 00:16:24,580
Of course it isn't.
387
00:16:24,780 --> 00:16:26,760
He may not take that
out on your son,
388
00:16:26,960 --> 00:16:29,065
and everyone agrees with that,
389
00:16:29,090 --> 00:16:30,651
especially Hank.
390
00:16:32,250 --> 00:16:34,894
So we're on the same page.
391
00:16:35,540 --> 00:16:37,425
Bowel Armageddon? Really?
392
00:16:37,450 --> 00:16:39,340
Hank, this article, this is bad.
393
00:16:39,365 --> 00:16:41,703
I'm sure they twisted my words.
394
00:16:43,165 --> 00:16:44,215
Oh.
395
00:16:44,240 --> 00:16:47,126
No, that's pretty much verbatim.
396
00:16:48,018 --> 00:16:50,085
Well, they were
ganging up on me.
397
00:16:50,110 --> 00:16:51,350
They don't mention that.
398
00:16:51,375 --> 00:16:53,095
Every phone call I've had today?
399
00:16:53,120 --> 00:16:55,316
Board members demanding that
I kick your butt off campus.
400
00:16:55,340 --> 00:16:56,523
Maybe you explain to them
401
00:16:56,548 --> 00:16:58,228
just how powerless your
position really is?
402
00:16:58,260 --> 00:16:59,486
I think they'll understand.
403
00:16:59,510 --> 00:17:00,620
I wish I could.
404
00:17:00,645 --> 00:17:02,101
It would make my life
a whole lot easier.
405
00:17:02,125 --> 00:17:04,055
Well, I think it's a good thing.
406
00:17:04,080 --> 00:17:05,320
I put it out there.
407
00:17:05,345 --> 00:17:07,370
Maybe Railton can
become a beacon,
408
00:17:07,395 --> 00:17:10,787
a refuge now for really,
really lazy students.
409
00:17:10,812 --> 00:17:13,333
Just apologize to the
kid and his parents,
410
00:17:13,358 --> 00:17:14,986
make this go away. I
don't need this today.
411
00:17:15,010 --> 00:17:16,595
No, I am not apologizing.
412
00:17:16,620 --> 00:17:19,165
I mean, unless you name
a building after me...
413
00:17:19,190 --> 00:17:20,470
And not a dorm.
414
00:17:20,495 --> 00:17:23,210
I don't want any of these
idiots sleeping in my building.
415
00:17:23,410 --> 00:17:24,410
[Jill] Jacob?
416
00:17:24,500 --> 00:17:25,780
The President's on.
417
00:17:25,805 --> 00:17:27,300
You tell him I'm not sorry.
418
00:17:27,325 --> 00:17:28,378
Hank!
419
00:17:28,403 --> 00:17:30,525
This is not about you and
your little situation.
420
00:17:30,550 --> 00:17:32,300
I'll take it in the
conference room.
421
00:17:32,357 --> 00:17:33,656
Please tell the
William-Stevenses
422
00:17:33,680 --> 00:17:35,191
that I'll be back momentarily.
423
00:17:41,040 --> 00:17:43,318
Did Gracie really
deserve all that teasing?
424
00:17:43,343 --> 00:17:44,533
[Hank] "Deserve".
425
00:17:44,600 --> 00:17:47,015
You don't still believe
in "deserve", do you?
426
00:17:47,040 --> 00:17:48,535
It's an unfair world,
427
00:17:48,560 --> 00:17:51,387
I'm not going to even things
up with a few kind acts.
428
00:17:52,580 --> 00:17:54,366
You know...
429
00:17:54,952 --> 00:17:56,140
tenure doesn't mean
430
00:17:56,220 --> 00:17:57,506
you can't get
smacked in the face.
431
00:17:57,530 --> 00:18:00,510
No, it just means I can
never, ever be fired.
432
00:18:00,535 --> 00:18:02,028
It doesn't mean that, either.
433
00:18:02,053 --> 00:18:03,954
It kinda feels like it.
434
00:18:04,689 --> 00:18:06,995
So you're trying to get fired
with no hope of success?
435
00:18:07,020 --> 00:18:08,340
You think I'm
trying to get fired?
436
00:18:08,370 --> 00:18:10,730
Did you apologize to the kid?
437
00:18:10,789 --> 00:18:12,059
For what?
438
00:18:14,175 --> 00:18:15,566
You don't think this
has anything to do
439
00:18:15,590 --> 00:18:16,590
with that article
440
00:18:16,615 --> 00:18:17,876
you're pretending
not to carry around?
441
00:18:17,900 --> 00:18:19,964
I'm not carrying
anything around.
442
00:18:19,989 --> 00:18:21,615
No? So if I just...
443
00:18:21,640 --> 00:18:23,095
No, no!
444
00:18:23,120 --> 00:18:24,445
It might be there.
445
00:18:24,916 --> 00:18:26,016
I don't know.
446
00:18:27,610 --> 00:18:29,109
My father retires.
447
00:18:29,830 --> 00:18:30,975
It's a major thing.
448
00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:31,808
Big enough
449
00:18:31,833 --> 00:18:33,233
for the biggest
newspaper in the country
450
00:18:33,257 --> 00:18:34,886
to put it on the cover
of the arts section.
451
00:18:34,910 --> 00:18:36,233
Good for him.
452
00:18:37,800 --> 00:18:39,225
Also, I find out about it
453
00:18:39,250 --> 00:18:41,360
from the cover of
the arts section.
454
00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:43,510
Good for me.
455
00:18:43,535 --> 00:18:45,205
And this makes you feel...?
456
00:18:45,230 --> 00:18:46,230
Nothing.
457
00:18:47,219 --> 00:18:48,678
And that outburst in class?
458
00:18:48,703 --> 00:18:50,103
Was unrelated.
459
00:18:50,911 --> 00:18:52,295
In fact, it felt good.
460
00:18:52,320 --> 00:18:54,130
I told the truth.
461
00:18:54,155 --> 00:18:55,610
I think I inspired myself.
462
00:18:55,635 --> 00:18:57,891
To tell the truth more?
463
00:18:57,916 --> 00:18:59,359
That's not good.
464
00:19:00,170 --> 00:19:01,480
To work on my novel.
465
00:19:01,505 --> 00:19:03,625
Oh, great!
466
00:19:03,650 --> 00:19:05,820
Well, I love it when you
start your second novel.
467
00:19:05,860 --> 00:19:08,870
It's usually a wonderful
time in our marriage.
468
00:19:10,846 --> 00:19:12,221
How was your day?
469
00:19:15,010 --> 00:19:16,450
[Lily] Julie's coming over.
470
00:19:16,650 --> 00:19:18,060
I don't know why.
471
00:19:18,085 --> 00:19:19,925
[ "Jumping Strings" by
Paolo Andriotti playing]
472
00:19:19,950 --> 00:19:21,100
[Hank, thinking] I know why.
473
00:19:21,125 --> 00:19:22,935
It's these damn kids.
474
00:19:22,960 --> 00:19:25,940
They don't hate their parents...
475
00:19:26,140 --> 00:19:27,385
At least not enough
476
00:19:27,410 --> 00:19:29,770
to never ask them
for anything again.
477
00:19:29,989 --> 00:19:31,545
Yeah, I got it.
478
00:19:32,940 --> 00:19:34,030
The trouble is,
479
00:19:34,055 --> 00:19:36,170
my generation of parents...
480
00:19:36,195 --> 00:19:39,865
We can't let our kids
feel any pain in any way.
481
00:19:40,086 --> 00:19:42,276
It's a sick cycle,
482
00:19:42,483 --> 00:19:43,670
but to stop,
483
00:19:43,806 --> 00:19:46,660
that would take
courage and conviction.
484
00:19:46,685 --> 00:19:49,139
No. No way. It's your turn.
485
00:19:49,164 --> 00:19:51,356
I can't ask my mother for
money twice in six months.
486
00:19:51,380 --> 00:19:52,315
I can't do that.
487
00:19:52,340 --> 00:19:54,446
Why not? She just became
a general manager.
488
00:19:54,470 --> 00:19:56,015
Yeah, of a Circle K!
489
00:19:56,040 --> 00:19:57,864
- It's not fair!
- Fine!
490
00:19:59,440 --> 00:20:00,800
I know my dad.
491
00:20:00,825 --> 00:20:02,260
He's gonna hold this against me.
492
00:20:02,285 --> 00:20:03,285
Well, your mom's the one
493
00:20:03,310 --> 00:20:04,710
who handles all the
finances, right?
494
00:20:04,740 --> 00:20:05,806
He's probably not
even going to notice
495
00:20:05,830 --> 00:20:07,330
that she lent us the money.
496
00:20:07,750 --> 00:20:08,810
That's true.
497
00:20:09,010 --> 00:20:10,833
He doesn't notice anything.
498
00:20:13,325 --> 00:20:15,295
When she gave me
our Cancun money,
499
00:20:15,320 --> 00:20:16,596
she said if I
borrowed money again,
500
00:20:16,620 --> 00:20:19,170
she'd make me sit down
and learn Quicken.
501
00:20:19,370 --> 00:20:20,730
Which isn't me, you know?
502
00:20:20,755 --> 00:20:22,345
I know...
503
00:20:22,370 --> 00:20:23,370
I know.
504
00:20:24,733 --> 00:20:26,297
It's gotta be my dad.
505
00:20:33,560 --> 00:20:35,535
It's about respect.
506
00:20:35,560 --> 00:20:38,100
Gracie, why does this
stuff still bother you?
507
00:20:38,300 --> 00:20:39,490
You know who he is.
508
00:20:39,690 --> 00:20:41,128
Why something is wrong
509
00:20:41,153 --> 00:20:43,315
isn't relevant to
making it right.
510
00:20:44,270 --> 00:20:45,500
I can't do anything about it.
511
00:20:45,525 --> 00:20:46,700
Of course not.
512
00:20:46,780 --> 00:20:48,020
Hank's chair of the department.
513
00:20:48,090 --> 00:20:50,155
Course review falls
under his purview.
514
00:20:50,180 --> 00:20:52,505
As long as he's chair,
515
00:20:52,530 --> 00:20:54,510
there can't be
any serious action
516
00:20:54,535 --> 00:20:56,200
taken against him
or anyone else.
517
00:20:56,225 --> 00:20:57,945
"As long as he's chair"?
518
00:20:57,970 --> 00:20:59,332
Seriously?
519
00:20:59,357 --> 00:21:01,156
Hank's your problem, too.
520
00:21:02,256 --> 00:21:05,732
I mean, there is a person there.
521
00:21:10,433 --> 00:21:13,694
There was a time you
couldn't resist me.
522
00:21:16,646 --> 00:21:18,099
No one could.
523
00:21:20,130 --> 00:21:21,710
Excuse the interruption.
524
00:21:21,735 --> 00:21:23,576
The president's office
said to let you know
525
00:21:23,600 --> 00:21:25,366
that he explained the
urgency of the situation
526
00:21:25,390 --> 00:21:26,535
to the board chair,
527
00:21:26,560 --> 00:21:28,919
and the trustees will
convene next week.
528
00:21:29,127 --> 00:21:31,162
When you find out when it is,
529
00:21:31,187 --> 00:21:32,598
please clear that day.
530
00:21:32,623 --> 00:21:33,673
[Jill] Will do.
531
00:21:37,642 --> 00:21:41,012
This isn't about hitting
Hank with the notebook?
532
00:21:41,037 --> 00:21:42,188
Because he...
533
00:21:42,213 --> 00:21:44,465
He walked into it a bit.
534
00:21:44,490 --> 00:21:47,600
One day, I'm going to
meet an English professor
535
00:21:47,800 --> 00:21:49,000
who understands that the world
536
00:21:49,110 --> 00:21:51,560
is full of lots of
people and ideas...
537
00:21:51,760 --> 00:21:53,390
You could just say yes or no.
538
00:21:53,536 --> 00:21:55,393
There's no need to be insulting.
539
00:21:56,300 --> 00:21:58,045
Is it about Rourke's new course?
540
00:21:58,070 --> 00:21:59,410
Oh, my god.
541
00:22:02,390 --> 00:22:03,620
[Gracie] I'm telling you guys,
542
00:22:03,820 --> 00:22:05,620
this is the best thing
for our department.
543
00:22:05,746 --> 00:22:08,015
Gracie, this is very serious,
544
00:22:08,040 --> 00:22:09,320
and I have to say,
545
00:22:09,345 --> 00:22:12,195
we don't feel comfortable
plotting behind Hank's back.
546
00:22:12,570 --> 00:22:13,850
This is a good idea.
547
00:22:13,875 --> 00:22:15,567
Okay. Let's see
what we can get.
548
00:22:16,667 --> 00:22:19,237
This isn't something
we should take lightly,
549
00:22:19,317 --> 00:22:21,687
and it is the best thing
for the students, too.
550
00:22:22,039 --> 00:22:23,279
Gosh, Gracie,
551
00:22:23,304 --> 00:22:25,985
it seems like a lot of risk
for not a lot of reward.
552
00:22:26,010 --> 00:22:29,470
Okay, if you support
Hank's de-chairing,
553
00:22:29,495 --> 00:22:32,220
I'll switch places with you
on the sabbatical waitlist.
554
00:22:35,056 --> 00:22:37,416
[train whistle blowing]
555
00:22:37,596 --> 00:22:40,526
[phone buzzing]
556
00:22:44,242 --> 00:22:45,987
Hank, your phone.
557
00:22:51,136 --> 00:22:52,536
Yeah?
558
00:22:52,570 --> 00:22:54,495
[Billie] Hello, Spanky.
559
00:22:54,520 --> 00:22:55,540
Billie.
560
00:22:55,565 --> 00:22:56,800
How drunk are you?
561
00:22:56,825 --> 00:22:58,800
Plenty, but it's none
of your damn business,
562
00:22:58,825 --> 00:22:59,760
you son of a bitch.
563
00:22:59,785 --> 00:23:01,155
Hey, did you write
564
00:23:01,180 --> 00:23:03,030
that recommendation
for my daughter?
565
00:23:03,055 --> 00:23:04,205
I will.
566
00:23:04,230 --> 00:23:06,330
You will not.
567
00:23:06,355 --> 00:23:07,976
I don't want Meg living
568
00:23:08,001 --> 00:23:09,012
this damn life
569
00:23:09,037 --> 00:23:11,277
in this damn town.
570
00:23:12,509 --> 00:23:14,825
Ugh. What do you know
about raising a kid?
571
00:23:14,850 --> 00:23:16,503
You didn't even have a dad.
572
00:23:17,109 --> 00:23:18,197
I did.
573
00:23:18,222 --> 00:23:20,245
You were in diapers
when that shithead left.
574
00:23:20,270 --> 00:23:21,730
I was 14.
575
00:23:21,760 --> 00:23:24,305
You didn't even send
your daughter to college.
576
00:23:24,330 --> 00:23:25,745
What the hell is her name?
577
00:23:25,770 --> 00:23:28,582
I'd prefer you didn't
bring up my daughter.
578
00:23:33,130 --> 00:23:34,410
Billie?
579
00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:35,610
You there?
580
00:23:36,564 --> 00:23:39,550
How come you always let
me talk to you like this?
581
00:23:42,920 --> 00:23:45,810
Look, just don't write
the recommendation,
582
00:23:46,230 --> 00:23:47,375
even though who knows
583
00:23:47,400 --> 00:23:49,254
what it's gonna be
worth after tomorrow.
584
00:23:50,190 --> 00:23:51,190
Tomorrow?
585
00:23:51,215 --> 00:23:52,797
What happens tomorrow?
586
00:23:53,783 --> 00:23:55,990
So you're gonna be de-chaired?
587
00:23:56,810 --> 00:23:58,034
And then what does that mean?
588
00:23:58,150 --> 00:23:59,465
[Hank] De-chaired.
589
00:23:59,635 --> 00:24:00,995
I think
590
00:24:01,020 --> 00:24:02,730
it's an outpatient
procedure these days.
591
00:24:04,222 --> 00:24:06,620
Well, if I'm no longer chair,
592
00:24:06,765 --> 00:24:09,355
it's easier to fire me,
593
00:24:09,380 --> 00:24:12,620
and if I get fired,
594
00:24:12,645 --> 00:24:15,693
that's the end of
my academic career.
595
00:24:20,526 --> 00:24:21,937
You're smiling.
596
00:24:23,216 --> 00:24:24,396
Am I?
597
00:24:27,190 --> 00:24:29,200
Is that, um, opportunity
598
00:24:29,225 --> 00:24:30,324
for you to be
599
00:24:30,349 --> 00:24:33,743
assistant head of school
at Arlyle still possible?
600
00:24:34,590 --> 00:24:35,869
Seriously?
601
00:24:38,200 --> 00:24:39,590
Um...
602
00:24:41,687 --> 00:24:44,487
I mean, that was months
ago, so I don't...
603
00:24:44,540 --> 00:24:45,467
I don't know.
604
00:24:45,492 --> 00:24:46,306
I mean...
605
00:24:46,331 --> 00:24:48,421
Yeah, I could ask.
606
00:24:50,250 --> 00:24:51,260
New York.
607
00:24:52,330 --> 00:24:54,210
God.
608
00:24:54,235 --> 00:24:56,483
Could it finally be time?
609
00:24:58,100 --> 00:25:01,127
MOMA, instead of Roger's Art.
610
00:25:02,106 --> 00:25:04,351
Peter Luger's
instead of Outback.
611
00:25:04,376 --> 00:25:05,826
Mm...
612
00:25:07,668 --> 00:25:10,099
I mean, we'd be a little
close to your father.
613
00:25:10,537 --> 00:25:12,777
It's a city of eight
million people.
614
00:25:13,136 --> 00:25:15,056
I think I can avoid him.
615
00:25:15,081 --> 00:25:16,971
I don't know.
616
00:25:17,379 --> 00:25:19,983
We saw Catherine Keener twice.
617
00:25:23,850 --> 00:25:25,243
Do you know you make a move
618
00:25:25,268 --> 00:25:27,911
every time I say
"Catherine Keener"?
619
00:25:27,936 --> 00:25:30,349
Keep saying it, see
what it gets you.
620
00:25:42,650 --> 00:25:43,650
[phone buzzing]
621
00:25:43,690 --> 00:25:44,949
Yes?
622
00:25:44,974 --> 00:25:47,418
[woman] Hi. Am I speaking
with Professor Devereaux Jr.?
623
00:25:47,443 --> 00:25:48,791
Just Professor Devereaux.
624
00:25:48,816 --> 00:25:50,365
I've never had any confusion.
625
00:25:50,390 --> 00:25:52,455
Yes. Hello,
Professor Devereaux.
626
00:25:52,480 --> 00:25:54,993
This is Marnie Cole from
your father's office.
627
00:25:57,450 --> 00:26:00,800
Um, I hate to bother
you like this, but...
628
00:26:01,223 --> 00:26:02,583
Yeah?
629
00:26:02,608 --> 00:26:03,798
Stephanie asked me to call
630
00:26:03,823 --> 00:26:05,745
and let you know that
she has left your father.
631
00:26:05,770 --> 00:26:07,515
Stephanie? Is that the maid?
632
00:26:07,540 --> 00:26:08,659
She's his wife.
633
00:26:08,684 --> 00:26:12,865
Uh, okay, well, I guess he'll
have to get a third wife.
634
00:26:12,890 --> 00:26:14,300
Well, that was his third wife.
635
00:26:14,325 --> 00:26:16,475
Well, I wish her well then.
636
00:26:16,500 --> 00:26:19,980
So, it's not an ideal
time for him to be alone.
637
00:26:20,005 --> 00:26:22,042
I think maybe he
could use some help.
638
00:26:22,067 --> 00:26:24,138
Marnie, um, I'm sorry.
639
00:26:24,163 --> 00:26:25,483
In the future,
640
00:26:25,508 --> 00:26:27,400
could you leave
messages like this
641
00:26:27,425 --> 00:26:29,365
with my assistant
in my office, okay?
642
00:26:29,390 --> 00:26:31,035
'Cause this is my personal cell.
643
00:26:31,060 --> 00:26:33,808
This is only for friends
and work and family
644
00:26:33,833 --> 00:26:35,293
and marketing calls.
645
00:26:35,318 --> 00:26:37,245
Okay? You have
that other number?
646
00:26:37,270 --> 00:26:39,810
I do, but he is your family.
647
00:26:39,849 --> 00:26:41,461
Well, then he can call me.
648
00:26:41,486 --> 00:26:43,929
That would be the
first time in 15 years.
649
00:26:46,839 --> 00:26:49,159
I'm submitting an
alternate budget.
650
00:26:49,340 --> 00:26:50,340
Good.
651
00:26:50,365 --> 00:26:52,753
The first one was so boring.
652
00:26:56,536 --> 00:26:59,005
Could you run the
freshman requirements
653
00:26:59,030 --> 00:27:03,480
and service a major with
five professors, or...
654
00:27:03,680 --> 00:27:06,587
or four professors and
add a few more adjuncts?
655
00:27:07,286 --> 00:27:09,535
I need an answer or
I'm just gonna guess.
656
00:27:09,560 --> 00:27:10,360
Oh...
657
00:27:10,560 --> 00:27:12,410
this is fun.
658
00:27:12,435 --> 00:27:15,035
I like that we do
this every year.
659
00:27:15,060 --> 00:27:16,676
You know, we could
skip the stage
660
00:27:16,700 --> 00:27:17,625
where you threaten cuts
661
00:27:17,650 --> 00:27:18,676
and jump right to the part
662
00:27:18,700 --> 00:27:19,980
where you give me
my full budget.
663
00:27:20,005 --> 00:27:21,765
I've got a fantasy
pickleball league
664
00:27:21,827 --> 00:27:23,050
that's heating up.
665
00:27:23,090 --> 00:27:25,117
I don't have time for this.
666
00:27:26,500 --> 00:27:27,670
What?
667
00:27:29,666 --> 00:27:32,035
Jacob, what is it?
668
00:27:32,060 --> 00:27:33,468
You may have noticed
669
00:27:33,500 --> 00:27:36,735
that half the schools in
the country are broke.
670
00:27:36,760 --> 00:27:38,955
I noticed they're going
out to dinner less often.
671
00:27:38,980 --> 00:27:41,265
Well, think about
672
00:27:41,290 --> 00:27:44,516
what you can pull off with
three fewer professors.
673
00:27:47,883 --> 00:27:50,817
If I'm still chair in
an hour, I'll do that.
674
00:27:56,046 --> 00:27:58,146
Uh, first of all,
675
00:27:58,480 --> 00:27:59,710
I'd like to, um,
676
00:27:59,735 --> 00:28:00,914
I'd like to point out that,
677
00:28:00,939 --> 00:28:02,555
although I am
completely agnostic
678
00:28:02,580 --> 00:28:04,557
as to the outcome of the vote
that's about to take place...
679
00:28:04,581 --> 00:28:05,810
Paul, can you join us?
680
00:28:05,835 --> 00:28:07,895
Thank you. Thank you.
681
00:28:08,210 --> 00:28:10,060
Um, I was asked...
682
00:28:10,085 --> 00:28:11,295
by Dean Rose...
683
00:28:11,320 --> 00:28:12,730
Yeah, right.
684
00:28:12,755 --> 00:28:15,626
To call this meeting
and motion for a vote.
685
00:28:20,875 --> 00:28:23,861
I heard that there was a
vote to remove me as chair.
686
00:28:23,886 --> 00:28:25,686
I just... I didn't
want to miss it.
687
00:28:25,926 --> 00:28:27,126
Jesus, Billie.
688
00:28:27,151 --> 00:28:29,526
Oh, what's the
goddamned difference?
689
00:28:36,216 --> 00:28:39,327
So, um, Professor
Wheemer has agreed
690
00:28:39,352 --> 00:28:40,470
to run the proceedings.
691
00:28:40,650 --> 00:28:41,868
I didn't really.
692
00:28:41,893 --> 00:28:43,213
[Billie] Weiner?
693
00:28:43,238 --> 00:28:44,461
She's not a professor.
694
00:28:44,520 --> 00:28:45,845
She shows movies.
695
00:28:45,870 --> 00:28:47,020
How is that teaching?
696
00:28:47,160 --> 00:28:48,385
She's a projectionist.
697
00:28:48,483 --> 00:28:50,373
Okay, it's "Wheemer"
with an "M",
698
00:28:50,402 --> 00:28:53,160
and I don't want to be
running these proceedings.
699
00:28:53,360 --> 00:28:54,360
I shouldn't.
700
00:28:54,530 --> 00:28:55,680
It's not fair.
701
00:28:55,705 --> 00:28:57,060
People around the world
702
00:28:57,190 --> 00:28:58,470
don't have access
to free speech,
703
00:28:58,670 --> 00:29:00,380
and I should just feel free
704
00:29:00,405 --> 00:29:03,793
to go on about calls and
recounts and whatnot?
705
00:29:03,818 --> 00:29:04,851
It's obscene.
706
00:29:04,876 --> 00:29:07,290
Okay, thanks, we
got it. Go, now.
707
00:29:09,566 --> 00:29:11,166
Okay, we're here for
a no-confidence vote
708
00:29:11,191 --> 00:29:13,310
for the chair of the department,
709
00:29:13,335 --> 00:29:14,705
for certain events
710
00:29:14,730 --> 00:29:16,316
that have transpired
over the past few days,
711
00:29:16,340 --> 00:29:21,038
and how he's conducted himself
in regards to those events.
712
00:29:21,809 --> 00:29:23,119
Would the accused
713
00:29:23,144 --> 00:29:24,985
like to say anything in his
defense before the vote?
714
00:29:25,009 --> 00:29:26,559
The accused?
715
00:29:26,584 --> 00:29:27,779
It was a good flick.
716
00:29:27,804 --> 00:29:29,760
Jodie Foster. She won
an Oscar for that film.
717
00:29:29,785 --> 00:29:31,636
We watch it in my
gender-analysis film class.
718
00:29:31,660 --> 00:29:33,760
New Bedford Chamber of
Commerce hated that movie.
719
00:29:33,904 --> 00:29:34,895
It killed the Moby Dick tours.
720
00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:36,070
Okay, can we please...?
721
00:29:36,095 --> 00:29:40,227
Yes, the accused would
like to make a statement.
722
00:29:42,879 --> 00:29:44,849
The kid that I yelled at...
723
00:29:45,285 --> 00:29:46,565
okay...
724
00:29:46,590 --> 00:29:48,300
he killed my governess.
725
00:29:48,325 --> 00:29:49,460
This is many years ago,
726
00:29:49,485 --> 00:29:52,635
and I vowed revenge,
and now I have it,
727
00:29:52,686 --> 00:29:56,813
and it feels empty in the
way that novels predict.
728
00:30:04,213 --> 00:30:07,315
The question at hand
is a simple aye or nay.
729
00:30:07,340 --> 00:30:10,190
Should Hank be removed
from the chair?
730
00:30:10,390 --> 00:30:11,781
"Aye" means "yes".
731
00:30:11,806 --> 00:30:13,315
Can you just say yes?
732
00:30:13,340 --> 00:30:15,026
[Emma] Short answer,
yes with caveats.
733
00:30:15,050 --> 00:30:16,420
It requires a vote.
734
00:30:16,445 --> 00:30:17,620
You can make that motion,
735
00:30:17,645 --> 00:30:19,465
but not until a call
for new business.
736
00:30:19,490 --> 00:30:21,335
And I assume you
can get it seconded.
737
00:30:21,360 --> 00:30:24,385
I second the motion
that "aye" means "yes".
738
00:30:24,410 --> 00:30:26,560
Well, there hasn't been
a call for new business.
739
00:30:26,585 --> 00:30:28,040
I literally just explained that.
740
00:30:28,100 --> 00:30:29,250
Jesus Christ, guys.
741
00:30:29,321 --> 00:30:31,056
"Aye" it is!
742
00:30:31,195 --> 00:30:32,305
So an aye for an aye then?
743
00:30:32,330 --> 00:30:33,330
[laughs]
744
00:30:40,560 --> 00:30:42,344
[Hank, thinking]
The firing squad.
745
00:30:42,786 --> 00:30:45,885
They never sent one
person... It's a squad.
746
00:30:45,910 --> 00:30:49,015
The group effort makes it
more of a bonding event...
747
00:30:49,040 --> 00:30:53,375
Like lions ripping
apart a scared gazelle.
748
00:30:54,100 --> 00:30:55,590
A pride.
749
00:30:55,615 --> 00:30:56,780
Good times.
750
00:30:57,669 --> 00:30:59,155
Okay, that's one aye,
751
00:30:59,180 --> 00:31:00,590
a nay,
752
00:31:00,750 --> 00:31:02,510
another aye...
753
00:31:02,656 --> 00:31:04,196
another aye,
754
00:31:04,377 --> 00:31:07,367
and that's it.
755
00:31:08,103 --> 00:31:10,720
That's three ayes, a nay,
and the rest abstain.
756
00:31:11,496 --> 00:31:13,031
Well, the ayes have it.
757
00:31:13,869 --> 00:31:16,116
Hank is officially
removed as the chair.
758
00:31:18,526 --> 00:31:19,706
[June] Wait.
759
00:31:19,906 --> 00:31:22,042
Who is the next chair?
760
00:31:25,000 --> 00:31:26,790
[Gracie] Why...
761
00:31:26,815 --> 00:31:30,141
so why don't we take
some time to discuss,
762
00:31:30,166 --> 00:31:33,588
and meet again
tomorrow, same time?
763
00:31:34,583 --> 00:31:37,673
[ "Love Is Like The Sea"
by Peter Neri playing]
764
00:31:40,530 --> 00:31:44,500
[♪♪]
765
00:31:44,712 --> 00:31:48,562
♪ Love is like the sea
766
00:31:48,587 --> 00:31:53,815
♪ It carries you back
where you came from ♪
767
00:31:53,840 --> 00:31:57,255
♪ Love is like the cloud
768
00:31:57,280 --> 00:32:02,090
♪ Fading away but
it comes again ♪
769
00:32:02,290 --> 00:32:05,860
[♪♪]
770
00:32:12,570 --> 00:32:16,610
[♪♪]
771
00:32:19,493 --> 00:32:22,195
[Hank] I guess I finally
sunk my own battleship.
772
00:32:22,220 --> 00:32:25,545
That's the first time I made
the whole department happy.
773
00:32:25,570 --> 00:32:27,675
[Lily] Well, I wouldn't
beat yourself up too hard.
774
00:32:27,700 --> 00:32:28,700
[Hank] Done.
775
00:32:29,412 --> 00:32:31,680
Because...
776
00:32:31,705 --> 00:32:33,465
I called Tom Leska...
777
00:32:33,490 --> 00:32:37,030
and they have not filled
the position at Arlyle.
778
00:32:37,055 --> 00:32:38,590
He didn't exactly
offer me the job,
779
00:32:38,615 --> 00:32:41,348
but he sure seemed to
imply that I have a shot.
780
00:32:42,375 --> 00:32:43,543
Whoa.
781
00:32:43,683 --> 00:32:44,970
Yeah, I know.
782
00:32:51,306 --> 00:32:52,586
It's just...
783
00:32:52,611 --> 00:32:53,875
logistics.
784
00:32:53,900 --> 00:32:55,570
I mean, our...
785
00:32:55,595 --> 00:32:56,840
Our daughter's here,
786
00:32:56,886 --> 00:32:58,426
and my mom.
787
00:32:58,451 --> 00:33:00,056
There's a few things
that we need...
788
00:33:00,080 --> 00:33:01,235
We need to talk through,
789
00:33:01,260 --> 00:33:02,260
we need to work out.
790
00:33:02,300 --> 00:33:04,240
Don't. Don't. Don't do that.
791
00:33:04,336 --> 00:33:05,819
Don't do that.
792
00:33:11,269 --> 00:33:13,034
Actually, it's my fault.
793
00:33:15,190 --> 00:33:17,070
Where are you going?
794
00:33:17,270 --> 00:33:18,245
I'm going for a run.
795
00:33:18,270 --> 00:33:19,775
What? It's 11:00 p.m..
796
00:33:19,800 --> 00:33:20,860
You already ran today.
797
00:33:20,885 --> 00:33:22,126
There's raccoons out there!
798
00:33:22,150 --> 00:33:23,661
Did you just make a joke?
799
00:33:23,686 --> 00:33:24,686
Uh-uh.
800
00:33:30,250 --> 00:33:31,780
I forgot
801
00:33:31,805 --> 00:33:33,830
that you aren't capable
of leaving this town
802
00:33:33,855 --> 00:33:37,445
for reasons that will
only be fully understood
803
00:33:37,673 --> 00:33:39,253
by your future therapist.
804
00:33:39,775 --> 00:33:41,535
I learned it years ago,
805
00:33:41,560 --> 00:33:42,563
I just forgot it.
806
00:33:42,588 --> 00:33:44,223
So shame on me.
807
00:33:55,150 --> 00:33:56,720
[Julie] Good morning.
808
00:33:56,920 --> 00:33:57,920
Hey.
809
00:33:59,980 --> 00:34:01,747
Um, I made coffee.
810
00:34:03,460 --> 00:34:05,210
Thanks.
811
00:34:05,235 --> 00:34:07,215
You came over here
early in the morning
812
00:34:07,240 --> 00:34:08,565
to make me coffee?
813
00:34:08,590 --> 00:34:10,662
I just wanted to have
breakfast with you guys.
814
00:34:11,600 --> 00:34:12,960
I was also going to tell you,
815
00:34:12,985 --> 00:34:16,875
um, I saw Stacey Rose at
the supermarket yesterday.
816
00:34:16,900 --> 00:34:19,215
I don't know if Dean Rose
mentioned that to you?
817
00:34:19,553 --> 00:34:20,875
[Hank] He didn't.
818
00:34:20,900 --> 00:34:22,220
[Julie] Well, she says hi.
819
00:34:22,245 --> 00:34:24,580
She wants everyone to come
over for dinner some time.
820
00:34:25,289 --> 00:34:26,996
The whole gang.
821
00:34:30,839 --> 00:34:32,629
Do you want to play Bananagrams?
822
00:34:32,654 --> 00:34:34,774
Do you remember when we used
to do this before school?
823
00:34:35,930 --> 00:34:36,970
Yeah, sure.
824
00:34:47,160 --> 00:34:48,860
Oh, um...
825
00:34:49,060 --> 00:34:50,220
I was also going to tell you,
826
00:34:50,320 --> 00:34:51,340
Russell actually has
827
00:34:51,456 --> 00:34:52,950
a pretty interesting
opportunity.
828
00:34:53,096 --> 00:34:54,426
Oh?
829
00:34:54,680 --> 00:34:57,170
Yeah, yeah, it's
pretty exciting stuff,
830
00:34:57,370 --> 00:34:58,570
and it's really next level,
831
00:34:58,595 --> 00:35:00,250
and he can get in
on the ground floor.
832
00:35:00,275 --> 00:35:01,555
Ground floor, that sounds...
833
00:35:01,580 --> 00:35:03,875
That sounds a little
low for next level.
834
00:35:03,900 --> 00:35:05,266
Are you sure he's got
the right entrance?
835
00:35:05,290 --> 00:35:08,010
That is hilarious.
836
00:35:08,210 --> 00:35:09,450
Um...
837
00:35:09,650 --> 00:35:10,710
yeah, no,
838
00:35:10,735 --> 00:35:11,675
it would just require him
839
00:35:11,700 --> 00:35:12,942
not getting a
paycheck for a while,
840
00:35:12,966 --> 00:35:13,966
is the thing.
841
00:35:14,063 --> 00:35:15,975
- Darn it.
- Yeah.
842
00:35:16,000 --> 00:35:17,415
So we're just figuring out
843
00:35:17,440 --> 00:35:20,070
how to get from here to
there in the meantime.
844
00:35:21,593 --> 00:35:22,593
You know what?
845
00:35:22,880 --> 00:35:24,333
I think I could help.
846
00:35:26,768 --> 00:35:28,335
Really?
847
00:35:28,360 --> 00:35:29,945
Yeah. I mean, my thought is
848
00:35:29,970 --> 00:35:32,380
what if Russell were to
take a less interesting job,
849
00:35:32,442 --> 00:35:33,740
but one that paid right away?
850
00:35:33,890 --> 00:35:34,890
Dad!
851
00:35:34,930 --> 00:35:36,210
See, I'm doing the math,
852
00:35:36,252 --> 00:35:37,786
and I think that actually,
that works great.
853
00:35:37,810 --> 00:35:38,916
You're not doing the math,
you're being an asshole.
854
00:35:38,940 --> 00:35:40,086
Now is not a good time, okay,
855
00:35:40,110 --> 00:35:40,915
because I have to
save for retirement.
856
00:35:40,940 --> 00:35:41,848
It's never a good time!
857
00:35:41,873 --> 00:35:42,900
I owe that to you,
858
00:35:42,940 --> 00:35:44,920
otherwise I become
your dependent
859
00:35:45,040 --> 00:35:46,320
and live in your home.
860
00:35:46,345 --> 00:35:49,024
"Michael experienced 4:00
a.m. differently as an adult.
861
00:35:49,049 --> 00:35:51,548
The alarm clock used to mean
hockey practice and friends,
862
00:35:51,573 --> 00:35:53,073
and now it means cows
863
00:35:53,098 --> 00:35:54,626
and the start of another
shift on the ranch..."
864
00:35:54,650 --> 00:35:56,015
Okay, let's talk.
865
00:35:56,040 --> 00:35:58,800
You mean us, or...?
866
00:35:58,825 --> 00:36:01,667
Yeah, what do we all think
of this letter from Bartow?
867
00:36:02,800 --> 00:36:03,980
Are you asking us?
868
00:36:04,180 --> 00:36:07,285
'Cause I think he made
some pretty good points.
869
00:36:07,310 --> 00:36:09,213
Okay, name one.
870
00:36:09,520 --> 00:36:14,716
That we deserve a teacher
who believes in us.
871
00:36:15,590 --> 00:36:16,860
That does sound nice.
872
00:36:16,885 --> 00:36:19,499
I mean, it's all in
the letter, Professor.
873
00:36:20,566 --> 00:36:22,525
"I, Bartow Williams-Stevens,
874
00:36:22,550 --> 00:36:24,350
am compelled to write
this open letter
875
00:36:24,422 --> 00:36:27,530
because you have humiliated
me and I feel terrible."
876
00:36:27,555 --> 00:36:30,408
Okay, you don't have to
say you feel terrible.
877
00:36:30,433 --> 00:36:33,535
That's a natural result
of being humiliated, so...
878
00:36:33,560 --> 00:36:35,370
repetitive.
879
00:36:35,395 --> 00:36:38,901
"I believe we deserve
teachers who believe in us."
880
00:36:38,926 --> 00:36:40,585
That's a lot of believing.
881
00:36:40,610 --> 00:36:43,954
Overuse of a word
diminishes its power.
882
00:36:47,360 --> 00:36:48,805
Well, it's terribly written,
883
00:36:48,830 --> 00:36:52,980
which is too bad because
he makes some good points.
884
00:36:55,020 --> 00:36:56,760
[knocking on door]
885
00:36:58,216 --> 00:37:00,475
Calvin just broke a window
in the east hallway.
886
00:37:00,500 --> 00:37:01,500
What?
887
00:37:01,525 --> 00:37:03,593
I told you. I said it.
888
00:37:03,618 --> 00:37:05,995
I said the kid needed
to be expelled,
889
00:37:06,358 --> 00:37:08,177
and then you charmed us.
890
00:37:08,202 --> 00:37:10,312
The situation didn't
need pacifying,
891
00:37:10,337 --> 00:37:12,097
it needed a hard action.
892
00:37:12,122 --> 00:37:13,510
You solved nothing.
893
00:37:21,830 --> 00:37:22,890
Can we make this quick
894
00:37:22,915 --> 00:37:25,751
because I lose my
court in 15 minutes?
895
00:37:26,897 --> 00:37:29,670
"Hell is empty and all
the devils are here."
896
00:37:29,776 --> 00:37:30,739
[Emma] Okay.
897
00:37:30,764 --> 00:37:32,666
Rules are a simple
plurality wins.
898
00:37:32,700 --> 00:37:35,075
You may vote for anyone,
including yourself.
899
00:37:35,100 --> 00:37:37,200
Once the votes are
filled out and collected,
900
00:37:37,232 --> 00:37:38,860
there is no adjustment
of the vote.
901
00:37:38,885 --> 00:37:40,515
It's final.
902
00:37:40,540 --> 00:37:42,775
Write along the
line with words...
903
00:37:42,800 --> 00:37:44,560
No doodles, Paul...
904
00:37:44,625 --> 00:37:46,390
And fold it one time.
905
00:37:46,415 --> 00:37:48,088
No quarter folds.
906
00:37:48,990 --> 00:37:50,792
Okay, does everyone understand?
907
00:37:52,210 --> 00:37:54,357
Goddamnit, I need to hear
a plurality of voices.
908
00:37:54,420 --> 00:37:55,220
[group, in unison] Aye.
909
00:37:55,308 --> 00:37:56,420
Hey! Look, you did it!
910
00:37:56,510 --> 00:37:57,805
All right, go ahead.
911
00:38:12,750 --> 00:38:14,060
All right.
912
00:38:14,085 --> 00:38:15,723
And here we go.
913
00:38:17,179 --> 00:38:18,772
One vote for June.
914
00:38:19,732 --> 00:38:21,245
One vote for Teddy.
915
00:38:21,270 --> 00:38:23,035
You voted for yourself?
916
00:38:23,060 --> 00:38:24,775
We agreed last night that...
917
00:38:24,800 --> 00:38:26,560
Yes, we agreed to vote for me.
918
00:38:26,585 --> 00:38:28,120
Why would we agree
to vote for you?
919
00:38:28,165 --> 00:38:29,566
- That makes no sense.
- There are complications.
920
00:38:29,590 --> 00:38:30,870
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
921
00:38:30,895 --> 00:38:33,458
Can you do your evil scheming
in your underground lair
922
00:38:33,483 --> 00:38:35,113
and not at work?
923
00:38:35,138 --> 00:38:36,694
One vote for me?
924
00:38:41,261 --> 00:38:44,445
One vote for "Hank. Ha
ha, damn you all to hell."
925
00:38:44,470 --> 00:38:45,795
Damn you all to hell.
926
00:38:45,820 --> 00:38:47,925
One vote for a new iPad.
927
00:38:47,950 --> 00:38:50,535
These go to Santa
eventually, right?
928
00:38:50,560 --> 00:38:52,234
One vote for Rourke.
929
00:38:53,050 --> 00:38:54,590
Don't mind if I do.
930
00:38:54,780 --> 00:38:56,155
[Emma] Yikes.
931
00:38:57,240 --> 00:38:59,152
And another vote for Hank.
932
00:39:03,020 --> 00:39:04,020
[Paul] Hank?
933
00:39:04,315 --> 00:39:05,985
Wait, what the
hell just happened?
934
00:39:06,010 --> 00:39:07,508
I...
935
00:39:07,533 --> 00:39:10,950
I thought that I was
throwing away my vote,
936
00:39:10,975 --> 00:39:14,175
um, as a form of abstaining,
937
00:39:14,200 --> 00:39:15,390
which, as you know
938
00:39:15,415 --> 00:39:17,176
from my essay, "The
Art of Abstention"...
939
00:39:17,200 --> 00:39:18,440
And that's it.
940
00:39:18,982 --> 00:39:20,472
[Teddy] Wait, what?
941
00:39:20,850 --> 00:39:24,960
Yeah, the only person with
more than one vote is...
942
00:39:25,440 --> 00:39:26,580
Hank.
943
00:39:30,846 --> 00:39:32,806
Hank's our new chair.
944
00:39:33,569 --> 00:39:36,105
[Emma] A fresh term of
three years begins...
945
00:39:36,130 --> 00:39:37,500
now.
946
00:39:37,766 --> 00:39:38,766
Sorry.
947
00:39:41,056 --> 00:39:44,276
[ "Free Love Sequence" by
Danielle Luppi playing]
948
00:39:52,595 --> 00:39:54,475
- My point.
- What?
949
00:39:54,500 --> 00:39:57,040
- Meniscus Rules.
- But you could've got that!
950
00:39:57,065 --> 00:39:58,345
Not without taking a step.
951
00:39:58,370 --> 00:40:00,724
You could have
tilted like a teapot.
952
00:40:02,910 --> 00:40:04,180
You're stepping now.
953
00:40:04,205 --> 00:40:06,655
To serve! It's different.
954
00:40:06,680 --> 00:40:08,746
Just once, I'd
like to play fair.
955
00:40:15,033 --> 00:40:16,203
My point.
956
00:40:18,736 --> 00:40:19,642
I'm wondering
957
00:40:19,667 --> 00:40:22,715
if it's the forbidden nature
of all the sexual politics
958
00:40:22,740 --> 00:40:25,020
that's making the sex better.
959
00:40:25,045 --> 00:40:27,285
There's more at risk.
960
00:40:27,473 --> 00:40:29,493
Maybe the sex is...
961
00:40:29,706 --> 00:40:32,116
exactly the same...
962
00:40:32,349 --> 00:40:33,716
and you're losing
touch with your partner
963
00:40:33,740 --> 00:40:35,240
as a human being
964
00:40:35,265 --> 00:40:39,095
due to your advanced age
and growing callousness.
965
00:40:39,120 --> 00:40:40,255
Yeah, I thought of that,
966
00:40:40,280 --> 00:40:42,040
but multiple women have told me
967
00:40:42,065 --> 00:40:43,955
I'm becoming a
better fornicator.
968
00:40:43,980 --> 00:40:46,090
Multiple women.
969
00:40:46,115 --> 00:40:47,526
And there's nothing
in it for them.
970
00:40:47,550 --> 00:40:49,283
They didn't have to say that.
971
00:40:53,359 --> 00:40:56,315
Why can't racquetball
be most of the day,
972
00:40:56,340 --> 00:40:58,920
and then everything
else is just one hour?
973
00:41:00,792 --> 00:41:02,195
Picture your perfect life.
974
00:41:02,220 --> 00:41:04,235
Put it on a tableau for me.
975
00:41:04,260 --> 00:41:06,162
Paint it on that wall.
976
00:41:06,780 --> 00:41:08,060
What do you see?
977
00:41:10,800 --> 00:41:14,020
[♪♪]
978
00:41:17,156 --> 00:41:19,640
I can't improve on
that white wall.
979
00:41:19,665 --> 00:41:21,555
It's...
980
00:41:21,603 --> 00:41:23,530
it's... it's soothing.
981
00:41:30,699 --> 00:41:32,969
I'm scared that...
982
00:41:33,236 --> 00:41:34,607
my father's retirement
983
00:41:34,640 --> 00:41:35,790
is going to upset
984
00:41:35,815 --> 00:41:38,237
this very delicate balance
that we've achieved.
985
00:41:39,293 --> 00:41:41,615
He left and we don't speak.
986
00:41:43,000 --> 00:41:45,360
I think I'm feeling regret.
987
00:41:45,493 --> 00:41:46,598
All these years,
988
00:41:46,623 --> 00:41:50,531
I haven't fully appreciated
all that I didn't have.
989
00:41:55,630 --> 00:41:57,240
Multiple women.
990
00:42:06,853 --> 00:42:09,265
- Hey, guess what?
- I'm running.
991
00:42:26,051 --> 00:42:27,540
They made me chair again.
992
00:42:27,565 --> 00:42:28,930
Three more years.
993
00:42:28,955 --> 00:42:30,326
[ "I Started A Joke" by
the Bee Gees playing]
994
00:42:30,350 --> 00:42:32,890
♪ I started a joke
995
00:42:32,915 --> 00:42:37,177
♪ Which started the
whole world crying... ♪
996
00:42:38,140 --> 00:42:39,653
I'll see you at home.
997
00:42:39,678 --> 00:42:43,311
♪ ...But I didn't see...
998
00:42:45,716 --> 00:42:49,660
♪ ...That the joke was on me
999
00:42:52,070 --> 00:42:54,927
I have this weird feeling
you're gonna end up in jail.
1000
00:42:55,413 --> 00:42:57,411
Or the hospital.
1001
00:42:58,607 --> 00:43:01,290
Hey, hey, hey! This
isn't my stuff.
1002
00:43:01,315 --> 00:43:02,463
Have a nice day.
1003
00:43:04,000 --> 00:43:06,315
Your ex-husband abandoned us.
1004
00:43:06,340 --> 00:43:08,070
He abandoned you.
1005
00:43:08,570 --> 00:43:10,585
I'm President Dickie Pope.
1006
00:43:10,610 --> 00:43:13,930
What is this guy up to?
1007
00:43:14,130 --> 00:43:15,805
My friend said there
were gonna be cuts.
1008
00:43:15,830 --> 00:43:19,010
Can you not be yourself and be
straight with us for one minute?
1009
00:43:19,035 --> 00:43:20,194
Do you hate it here?
1010
00:43:20,219 --> 00:43:21,483
I take the fifth.
1011
00:43:21,508 --> 00:43:23,333
Come on! You want
a piece of this?
1012
00:43:23,373 --> 00:43:25,985
That man is chair of
the English Department.
1013
00:43:26,010 --> 00:43:28,510
My anger has nowhere to go.
1014
00:43:28,885 --> 00:43:31,035
It's unhoused.
1015
00:43:31,060 --> 00:43:32,210
Jason!
1016
00:43:32,235 --> 00:43:33,430
I'm going to New York
1017
00:43:33,455 --> 00:43:34,950
to interview at
the Arlyle School.
1018
00:43:34,975 --> 00:43:37,395
- My life is here.
- Your life could move.
1019
00:43:37,420 --> 00:43:39,877
- My mom is here.
- You aren't talking to her.
1020
00:43:39,902 --> 00:43:41,325
I am here!
1021
00:43:43,010 --> 00:43:45,561
Hank, you know what? I think
I can taste the paprika.
1022
00:43:45,586 --> 00:43:46,832
It's a treasure.
1023
00:43:46,857 --> 00:43:50,607
♪
1024
00:43:53,880 --> 00:43:57,750
[♪♪]
70416
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