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1
00:00:09,133 --> 00:00:10,567
(SHANGHAI SURPRISE
PLAYING)
2
00:00:25,300 --> 00:00:29,300
* I can't understand
how I've gone astray
3
00:00:29,300 --> 00:00:33,433
* I should be sailing away
on a liner
4
00:00:33,433 --> 00:00:37,367
* I was knocked on my back
on a dock at Yangtze
5
00:00:37,367 --> 00:00:40,867
* It's a hell of a way
to see China
6
00:00:40,867 --> 00:00:42,067
* But I'm ready
7
00:00:44,767 --> 00:00:46,400
* You must be crazy
8
00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:50,900
* And you got no money
9
00:00:52,967 --> 00:00:54,900
* And you're a liar
10
00:00:58,233 --> 00:01:02,633
* My straits are dire
from the wok into the fire
11
00:01:02,633 --> 00:01:06,567
* I'd like to trust you
but I've broken my rickshaw
12
00:01:06,567 --> 00:01:08,367
* Sometimes there's
no hope in
13
00:01:08,367 --> 00:01:10,600
* In chasing opium, man
14
00:01:10,600 --> 00:01:12,300
* I'd like to love you
15
00:01:12,300 --> 00:01:14,300
* But I'm not sure
what's in your eyes
16
00:01:16,133 --> 00:01:18,967
* Shanghai surprise
17
00:01:18,967 --> 00:01:22,767
* Whatever you're saying,
I want it anyway in
18
00:01:22,767 --> 00:01:26,067
* Been hanging 'round like
a kid at your back door
19
00:01:26,067 --> 00:01:27,533
* Oh, babe
20
00:01:27,533 --> 00:01:30,600
* You could be kinder
and show me Asia Minor
21
00:01:30,600 --> 00:01:32,133
* I'll let you love me
22
00:01:32,133 --> 00:01:34,967
* Let you see what's here
in my eyes
23
00:01:36,667 --> 00:01:38,800
* Shanghai surprise
24
00:01:58,200 --> 00:02:00,700
* You must be crazy
* Crazy
25
00:02:02,367 --> 00:02:04,700
* And you got no money
* Money
26
00:02:06,333 --> 00:02:08,267
* And it seems like madness
27
00:02:11,567 --> 00:02:13,300
* Back streets
so crowded that
28
00:02:13,300 --> 00:02:15,833
* No room to swing a cat
29
00:02:15,833 --> 00:02:19,533
* I'd like to know you
but you're acting so coolie
30
00:02:19,533 --> 00:02:23,300
* I'm finding out pursued
by evil-looking dudes
31
00:02:23,300 --> 00:02:27,500
* It's getting hot for me
like tofu when it deep-fries
32
00:02:28,733 --> 00:02:32,067
* Oh, Shanghai surprise
33
00:02:32,067 --> 00:02:36,067
* But, baby, you look
like any common crook
34
00:02:36,067 --> 00:02:39,467
* That's hanging 'round
in those real shady places
35
00:02:39,467 --> 00:02:41,667
* While you assess me
36
00:02:41,667 --> 00:02:44,267
* Why not try to impress me?
37
00:02:44,267 --> 00:02:48,067
* Step over here, let me see
what's there in your eyes
38
00:02:49,333 --> 00:02:51,533
* Ah, Shanghai surprise
39
00:03:00,733 --> 00:03:02,133
(EXPLOSIONS RUMBLING)
40
00:03:04,367 --> 00:03:05,500
(DOG BARKING)
41
00:03:15,467 --> 00:03:17,933
How can you stuff yourself
at a time like this?
42
00:03:19,067 --> 00:03:20,600
We should be on our way.
43
00:03:21,533 --> 00:03:23,500
Simmer down, Willie.
44
00:03:23,500 --> 00:03:25,600
We'll go
when it's time to go.
45
00:03:25,600 --> 00:03:27,933
Good God, man, the Japs
are just down the road.
46
00:03:28,700 --> 00:03:30,600
Don't fret about the Japs.
47
00:03:30,600 --> 00:03:32,500
Their beef's with the Chinese.
48
00:03:34,067 --> 00:03:35,633
We'll be fine
once we cross the river
49
00:03:35,633 --> 00:03:37,600
into the international
settlement.
50
00:03:41,067 --> 00:03:43,533
The flowers are ready, master.
51
00:03:43,533 --> 00:03:45,100
Very good, Wu.
Thank you.
52
00:03:47,833 --> 00:03:49,367
Good God almighty,
53
00:03:49,367 --> 00:03:52,600
we've been hanging about here
for a bunch of bloody flowers?
54
00:03:52,600 --> 00:03:54,100
Now, Willie. It's time.
55
00:03:56,667 --> 00:03:58,533
WILLIE:
You're cracked, Walter.
You're nuts.
56
00:03:58,533 --> 00:04:01,167
You'll get us killed
over a bunch of flowers.
57
00:04:01,167 --> 00:04:03,367
Not your everyday
garden variety, Willie.
58
00:04:03,367 --> 00:04:04,500
Take a look.
59
00:04:17,667 --> 00:04:19,733
That's opium.
60
00:04:19,733 --> 00:04:22,067
You're looking at
a thousand dollars worth.
61
00:04:22,067 --> 00:04:25,067
Best international
currency in the world.
62
00:04:25,067 --> 00:04:27,067
Half the weight of gold,
63
00:04:27,067 --> 00:04:28,333
twice the value.
64
00:04:31,300 --> 00:04:32,500
Nail it up, Wu.
65
00:04:42,167 --> 00:04:43,333
Move out!
66
00:04:43,333 --> 00:04:44,667
(SPEAKING MANDARIN)
67
00:04:49,167 --> 00:04:50,900
(WU SHOUTING ORDERS
IN MANDARIN)
68
00:05:07,900 --> 00:05:09,567
Walter,
the bridge is that way.
69
00:05:09,567 --> 00:05:11,600
We're going for China Doll.
70
00:05:11,600 --> 00:05:13,900
For heaven's sake, Walter.
71
00:05:13,900 --> 00:05:17,400
There'll be
plenty of China Dolls
where we're headed.
72
00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:20,633
You ought to be taking notes
instead of drinking.
73
00:05:20,633 --> 00:05:23,267
Get a scoop for your paper,
74
00:05:23,267 --> 00:05:26,067
eyewitness to
the extraordinary getaway
of Walter Faraday,
75
00:05:26,933 --> 00:05:27,800
The Opium King.
76
00:05:45,800 --> 00:05:47,533
The power's out everywhere.
77
00:05:48,400 --> 00:05:50,600
Wu, light some torches.
78
00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:52,467
With the whole Chinese sector
about to fall,
79
00:05:52,467 --> 00:05:53,867
(WU YELLING IN MANDARIN)
you'd think she'd be waiting.
80
00:05:53,867 --> 00:05:55,067
What the devil?
81
00:05:57,700 --> 00:05:59,133
(SHOUTING IN MANDARIN)
82
00:06:03,833 --> 00:06:05,367
What the bloody hell...
83
00:06:12,300 --> 00:06:16,067
We're in luck, Walter.
It's not the Japs,
it's the Chinese.
84
00:06:16,067 --> 00:06:18,300
Now, look here, old man,
we're on our way
to the international...
85
00:06:18,300 --> 00:06:19,633
(YELLS IN MANDARIN)
86
00:06:26,867 --> 00:06:28,100
Hello, Mei Gan.
87
00:06:29,900 --> 00:06:32,633
I thought you'd be halfway
to Mongolia by now.
88
00:06:32,633 --> 00:06:35,067
I could not leave without
bidding you farewell.
89
00:06:36,400 --> 00:06:39,333
Where's China Doll?
What have you done with her?
90
00:06:39,333 --> 00:06:45,467
She was escorted
to a safer haven by your
loyal servant Wu Ch'En She.
91
00:06:45,467 --> 00:06:48,967
He should have informed you,
as he informed me,
you might be coming here.
92
00:06:50,400 --> 00:06:54,967
Now, you will kindly
return to me what is mine.
93
00:06:56,067 --> 00:06:57,933
I'm afraid my loyal servant
94
00:06:57,933 --> 00:07:00,367
seems to have
double-crossed us both.
95
00:07:00,367 --> 00:07:02,067
He just ran off with it.
96
00:07:02,067 --> 00:07:03,167
(YELLS IN MANDARIN)
97
00:07:03,167 --> 00:07:04,767
It won't do you any good.
98
00:07:06,800 --> 00:07:07,700
(SIGHS)
99
00:07:11,367 --> 00:07:14,067
Just the basic necessities
for life on the road.
100
00:07:25,867 --> 00:07:27,600
You know, for emergencies.
101
00:07:48,867 --> 00:07:49,867
For luck.
102
00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:52,333
A man can always use luck.
103
00:07:58,733 --> 00:08:00,900
I'd skip that one,
it's just mothballs.
104
00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:04,600
Run like hell!
105
00:08:05,600 --> 00:08:06,833
(MEN SCREAMING)
106
00:08:21,733 --> 00:08:23,900
Come on. Jump for it, Willie.
We've got to get across.
107
00:08:23,900 --> 00:08:26,667
I can't. Walter, I can't.
108
00:08:26,667 --> 00:08:28,267
Come on, Willie.
We have to.
109
00:08:30,300 --> 00:08:31,567
Whoo!
110
00:08:31,567 --> 00:08:32,633
(SCREAMING)
111
00:08:39,267 --> 00:08:40,267
(SCREAMS)
112
00:08:41,800 --> 00:08:42,933
Walter! Wa...
113
00:09:05,367 --> 00:09:06,800
(BOAT HORN BLOWING)
114
00:09:10,833 --> 00:09:12,167
(PEOPLE CHATTERING)
115
00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:19,067
(CAR HORN HONKING)
116
00:09:20,433 --> 00:09:22,067
(MAN SPEAKING JAPANESE)
117
00:09:25,267 --> 00:09:26,567
Thank you, lady.
118
00:09:35,733 --> 00:09:38,167
WASEY: Where's my baggage,
you castrated scum?
119
00:09:39,300 --> 00:09:40,800
I want my baggage!
MAN: You go! You go!
120
00:09:40,800 --> 00:09:42,333
(SHOUTING IN MANDARIN)
121
00:09:44,433 --> 00:09:45,667
Miss Tatlock,
122
00:09:46,700 --> 00:09:49,167
I think we've found our man.
123
00:09:49,167 --> 00:09:50,967
Mr. Burns,
you can't be serious.
124
00:09:52,433 --> 00:09:56,200
If he can be of help,
we'll use the devil himself.
125
00:09:56,200 --> 00:09:59,100
What about my wallet?
There was a wallet
in this jacket!
126
00:09:59,100 --> 00:10:02,033
MAN: You no money. You no go.
127
00:10:02,033 --> 00:10:05,433
You stole my last ten bucks,
you thieving cornhole pirate!
128
00:10:05,433 --> 00:10:07,000
(WASEY CONTINUES YELLING)
129
00:10:08,267 --> 00:10:10,133
Sir, can we be
of any assistance?
130
00:10:11,167 --> 00:10:13,167
Yeah, have you got
a torpedo handy?
131
00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:16,300
Look at that.
132
00:10:16,300 --> 00:10:19,067
He didn't even
finish the nipples on
my little sweetheart.
133
00:10:22,733 --> 00:10:24,067
(YELLING)
134
00:10:27,467 --> 00:10:28,333
(YELLING IN MANDARIN)
135
00:10:30,300 --> 00:10:32,633
The Helping Hand aids
many a weary traveler,
136
00:10:33,867 --> 00:10:35,333
Mr...
137
00:10:35,333 --> 00:10:36,667
Wasey. Glendon Wasey.
138
00:10:37,433 --> 00:10:38,733
(YELLS IN MANDARIN)
139
00:10:40,533 --> 00:10:44,267
We can't help
but sympathize with your
predicament, Mr. Wasey.
140
00:10:44,267 --> 00:10:47,000
I believe your ship is
due to leave on Thursday.
141
00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:49,633
How would you like
to earn your fare?
142
00:10:49,633 --> 00:10:52,200
Sorry. I'm not cut out
for the soup kitchen. Thanks.
143
00:10:52,200 --> 00:10:55,033
Well, all you have to do is
make a few enquiries for us.
144
00:10:55,033 --> 00:10:56,533
Yeah? Why me?
145
00:10:56,533 --> 00:10:58,500
You speak Chinese
with such flair.
146
00:10:58,500 --> 00:11:01,533
Yeah, a lot of good
it does me.
I might as well quack.
147
00:11:01,533 --> 00:11:04,300
We're anxious to contact
a rickshaw puller.
148
00:11:04,300 --> 00:11:07,067
He's the father of a soldier
who's lost his leg.
149
00:11:07,067 --> 00:11:09,600
The poor lad is delirious.
150
00:11:09,600 --> 00:11:12,067
I've absolutely no aptitude
for the native gibberish
151
00:11:12,067 --> 00:11:14,733
and Miss Tatlock's
only been here a few weeks.
152
00:11:14,733 --> 00:11:17,400
The boy was barely able
to scratch his father's name.
153
00:11:17,400 --> 00:11:18,900
Can you make it out?
154
00:11:20,900 --> 00:11:23,167
Wu Ch'En She.
155
00:11:23,167 --> 00:11:25,933
You see, Miss Tatlock,
I knew we'd picked a winner.
156
00:11:25,933 --> 00:11:28,667
You know, people don't talk
cheap here in Shanghai.
157
00:11:28,667 --> 00:11:31,100
I'm gonna need a bankroll.
158
00:11:31,100 --> 00:11:33,467
Whatever you need,
Miss Tatlock will provide.
159
00:11:35,067 --> 00:11:37,167
Not that we don't trust you,
of course.
160
00:11:37,167 --> 00:11:39,600
But a person free of
financial responsibility
161
00:11:39,600 --> 00:11:41,400
can perform
much more efficiently.
162
00:11:43,733 --> 00:11:44,900
What is that?
163
00:11:47,167 --> 00:11:49,800
Amy the Killer.
164
00:11:49,800 --> 00:11:51,700
I bought 100 gross of
these babies in Canton.
165
00:11:51,700 --> 00:11:53,300
They'll eat 'em up in LA.
166
00:11:53,967 --> 00:11:56,367
They glow in the dark.
167
00:11:56,367 --> 00:11:58,833
As a matter of fact,
they're glowing in
my crates right now.
168
00:11:58,833 --> 00:12:01,100
Hey, how would you
like to come into
169
00:12:01,100 --> 00:12:03,200
the shadows with me
and have a peek, baby?
170
00:12:03,200 --> 00:12:05,800
It's perfectly bright enough
as it is, thank you.
171
00:12:10,067 --> 00:12:12,933
You know,
I'll tell you something.
172
00:12:12,933 --> 00:12:16,467
There's probably 10,000
rickshaw boys in Shanghai.
173
00:12:17,867 --> 00:12:20,200
I'm gonna need a miracle.
174
00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:22,400
You forget my calling,
Mr. Wasey.
175
00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:23,967
I believe in miracles.
176
00:12:44,067 --> 00:12:46,767
Loan me ten cents,
ma'am, will ya?
I'm dry as a bone.
177
00:12:46,767 --> 00:12:49,067
Absolutely not.
I do not approve
of drinking.
178
00:12:49,067 --> 00:12:51,333
Look at me, I'm shaking.
I can't be any good to you
like this.
179
00:12:51,333 --> 00:12:53,100
You're wasting your time,
Mr. Wasey.
180
00:12:53,100 --> 00:12:54,833
What about rice?
181
00:12:54,833 --> 00:12:57,900
You don't have anything
against rice, do you?
I haven't eaten in three days.
182
00:12:57,900 --> 00:12:58,967
Very well.
183
00:13:02,100 --> 00:13:03,067
Thanks.
184
00:13:07,667 --> 00:13:09,067
(SPEAKING MANDARIN)
185
00:13:16,833 --> 00:13:17,700
Mmm.
186
00:13:21,500 --> 00:13:22,700
Uh, rice wine.
187
00:13:24,600 --> 00:13:26,600
Look at that.
Steady as a brain surgeon.
188
00:13:27,900 --> 00:13:30,600
I have something to
say to you, Mr. Wasey.
189
00:13:30,600 --> 00:13:32,500
I do not intend
to be made a fool of.
190
00:13:32,500 --> 00:13:34,867
You're flippant, facetious,
191
00:13:34,867 --> 00:13:37,233
and I suspect,
sorely lacking
in moral fiber.
192
00:13:37,233 --> 00:13:39,267
However, I am duty-bound
to Mr. Burns to work with you,
193
00:13:39,267 --> 00:13:41,133
and I shall try.
194
00:13:41,133 --> 00:13:43,067
We've made a deal,
you and I and he,
195
00:13:43,067 --> 00:13:44,200
and I expect you
to live up to it.
196
00:13:44,200 --> 00:13:45,700
Do I make myself clear?
197
00:13:49,300 --> 00:13:53,067
You don't like me much,
do you, ma'am?
198
00:13:53,067 --> 00:13:55,333
Well, maybe after you get
to know me a little bit,
what do you think?
199
00:13:55,333 --> 00:13:57,733
I think there's very
little chance of that.
200
00:13:57,733 --> 00:14:00,267
I expect our association
to be an extremely brief one.
201
00:14:00,267 --> 00:14:01,267
Pick one.
202
00:14:02,067 --> 00:14:04,300
I'll do no such thing.
203
00:14:04,300 --> 00:14:07,667
It's degrading to use
your fellow man
as a beast of burden.
204
00:14:07,667 --> 00:14:09,833
Yes, but when you're
looking for a rickshaw puller,
205
00:14:09,833 --> 00:14:11,833
the best person to ask
is the Rickshaw King.
206
00:14:11,833 --> 00:14:13,767
We'll take a taxi.
207
00:14:13,767 --> 00:14:15,433
Then we'll find
the Taxi King.
208
00:14:16,933 --> 00:14:18,267
(ALL CHATTERING)
209
00:14:32,700 --> 00:14:34,067
(SPEAKING MANDARIN)
210
00:14:41,067 --> 00:14:42,267
(ALL CLAMORING)
211
00:14:44,633 --> 00:14:45,933
TATLOCK: This is deplorable.
212
00:14:45,933 --> 00:14:47,433
Give me some money.
213
00:14:47,433 --> 00:14:49,600
You're not going to gamble
with mission funds, Mr. Wasey.
214
00:14:49,600 --> 00:14:50,833
You call it gambling.
I call it bribery.
215
00:14:50,833 --> 00:14:53,100
Either way we've got
to loosen some lips.
216
00:14:56,300 --> 00:14:58,600
(SPEAKING MANDARIN)
217
00:14:58,600 --> 00:15:00,667
Come on, Jiminy,
whip his ass, boy.
218
00:15:02,167 --> 00:15:03,500
(SPEAKING MANDARIN)
219
00:15:09,867 --> 00:15:11,167
(SPEAKING MANDARIN)
220
00:15:13,500 --> 00:15:15,200
(SPEAKING MANDARIN)
221
00:15:15,200 --> 00:15:16,433
Wu Ch'En She!
222
00:15:16,433 --> 00:15:17,733
(SPEAKING MANDARIN)
223
00:15:19,067 --> 00:15:20,067
Wu Ch'En She!
224
00:15:20,067 --> 00:15:21,200
(SPITTING)
225
00:15:21,200 --> 00:15:23,100
Wu Ch'En She!
226
00:15:23,100 --> 00:15:25,667
I don't think this guy's
very popular around here.
227
00:15:27,333 --> 00:15:28,400
(SPITTING)
228
00:15:30,533 --> 00:15:32,233
Uh, let's get out of here.
229
00:15:32,233 --> 00:15:33,500
(ALL CLAMORING)
230
00:15:48,733 --> 00:15:51,067
You really want to
find this guy, huh?
231
00:15:51,067 --> 00:15:53,333
We're not going to be
discouraged by
one little setback.
232
00:15:53,333 --> 00:15:55,800
One little setback?
I'd call it a lynch mob.
233
00:15:55,800 --> 00:15:59,767
Alcoholics always
tend to overdramatize.
234
00:15:59,767 --> 00:16:03,700
You're probably right.
So, I guess we'll just ignore
the guy following us, huh?
235
00:16:05,433 --> 00:16:07,833
It's the horrid man
from the cricket fight.
236
00:16:07,833 --> 00:16:08,967
He's gaining.
237
00:16:10,633 --> 00:16:11,867
Give me a coin.
238
00:16:13,300 --> 00:16:15,433
Come on, lady,
we've got to grease
the wheels.
239
00:16:15,433 --> 00:16:16,733
(SPEAKING MANDARIN)
240
00:16:37,733 --> 00:16:38,800
(GRUNTING)
241
00:16:57,100 --> 00:16:58,567
(YELLING IN MANDARIN)
242
00:17:08,467 --> 00:17:09,800
(CHICKENS CLUCKING)
243
00:17:11,500 --> 00:17:12,433
Uh-oh.
244
00:17:15,067 --> 00:17:16,467
That man is a maniac.
245
00:17:19,067 --> 00:17:21,300
I need a weapon.
What have you got
for a weapon?
246
00:17:23,233 --> 00:17:24,600
Here, take that.
247
00:17:26,500 --> 00:17:27,467
(GRUNTS)
248
00:17:29,200 --> 00:17:30,200
(SCREAMS)
249
00:17:38,733 --> 00:17:39,767
(GRUNTS)
250
00:17:40,567 --> 00:17:41,733
Please!
251
00:17:41,733 --> 00:17:42,867
Dear friend.
252
00:17:44,833 --> 00:17:46,267
Justin Kronk?
253
00:17:46,267 --> 00:17:50,567
I can help you locate
a certain gentleman.
254
00:17:50,567 --> 00:17:53,067
Help Mr. Kronk
to his feet, Mr. Wasey.
255
00:17:53,067 --> 00:17:55,600
Oh, thank you,
dear Madame.
256
00:18:00,467 --> 00:18:02,600
Am I to understand
you can help us find
a Mr. Wu Ch'En She?
257
00:18:02,600 --> 00:18:04,300
Shh!
258
00:18:04,300 --> 00:18:07,167
Why does everybody
get their peckers in a vice
when you mention Wu Ch'En She?
259
00:18:07,167 --> 00:18:08,767
The gentleman is a renegade,
260
00:18:08,767 --> 00:18:10,367
a swindler, and a cheat.
261
00:18:11,700 --> 00:18:13,267
Is that all
they have against him?
262
00:18:13,267 --> 00:18:16,200
He owes most of those men
money from gambling debts,
263
00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:17,867
an act of extreme dishonor.
264
00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:20,800
They would kill him on sight.
265
00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:23,700
Now, I personally do not know
the gentleman's whereabouts,
266
00:18:26,167 --> 00:18:29,200
but for a small fee,
I can take you
to someone who does.
267
00:18:43,833 --> 00:18:45,067
(SPEAKS MANDARIN)
268
00:18:46,633 --> 00:18:50,700
My friend presides
over a very successful
insurance company.
269
00:18:50,700 --> 00:18:55,933
But, you know, Mr. Wasey,
local custom requires that
you conduct a little business
270
00:18:55,933 --> 00:18:58,333
before requesting information
from a stranger.
271
00:18:59,400 --> 00:19:00,333
Come.
272
00:19:07,100 --> 00:19:08,333
Kronk.
273
00:19:08,333 --> 00:19:10,300
Venerable sir,
274
00:19:10,300 --> 00:19:11,633
I have some business for you.
275
00:19:11,633 --> 00:19:12,433
Ah!
276
00:19:19,133 --> 00:19:21,333
Good afternoon,
reverend lady, gentleman.
277
00:19:22,433 --> 00:19:23,767
Please sit down.
278
00:19:26,133 --> 00:19:28,433
My calling name
is Ho Chong.
279
00:19:30,100 --> 00:19:32,267
And greeting is
deeply extended.
280
00:19:33,567 --> 00:19:35,900
Unlike Western companies,
281
00:19:35,900 --> 00:19:41,167
I insure those parts
of the body the most
precious by my customs.
282
00:19:41,167 --> 00:19:44,067
How big a policy
we gotta buy
to find Wu Ch'En She?
283
00:19:44,067 --> 00:19:48,733
Ah! Here's a fine bargain.
The armpits, the genitals
and both ankles
284
00:19:49,633 --> 00:19:51,233
at 40 Shanghai dollars.
285
00:19:53,067 --> 00:19:54,700
What do you got for 30?
286
00:19:54,700 --> 00:19:59,733
For $30,
I could do the armpits,
the genitals and both ankles.
287
00:20:01,100 --> 00:20:02,933
But I could not
find Wu Ch'En She.
288
00:20:03,833 --> 00:20:05,100
Okay. How about
289
00:20:06,933 --> 00:20:09,533
the armpits,
the genitals...
Mr. Wasey!
290
00:20:09,533 --> 00:20:12,733
Would you please
conclude this transaction?
291
00:20:12,733 --> 00:20:15,467
All right. We'll take
your $40 policy.
292
00:20:15,467 --> 00:20:17,767
(CHUCKLES) And you,
reverend lady,
293
00:20:17,767 --> 00:20:19,767
would you care protection
for certain parts?
294
00:20:20,467 --> 00:20:22,233
No, thank you.
295
00:20:22,233 --> 00:20:24,200
The lips and ears perhaps.
296
00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:25,667
Thank you, I said no.
297
00:20:25,667 --> 00:20:27,400
Your twin pagodas, maybe?
298
00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:29,467
Definitely not.
299
00:20:29,467 --> 00:20:33,100
Surely you would
to protect your haven
of celestial bliss.
300
00:20:33,100 --> 00:20:35,833
Dare you!
I don't think her haven
is in much danger.
301
00:20:35,833 --> 00:20:38,500
Mr. Wasey,
I demand we conclude
our business here.
302
00:20:39,900 --> 00:20:45,433
Okay, she'll take
the ears, the lips
and them twin pagodas.
303
00:20:47,867 --> 00:20:48,833
Uh-huh.
304
00:20:50,133 --> 00:20:52,133
Excellent!
305
00:20:52,133 --> 00:20:53,600
If you will follow me,
please?
306
00:20:56,267 --> 00:20:58,433
Am I walking too rapidly,
reverend lady?
307
00:20:59,500 --> 00:21:01,233
What's that
awful stench?
308
00:21:01,233 --> 00:21:04,500
Oh, merely the fragrance of
a successful fishing voyage.
309
00:21:07,500 --> 00:21:09,900
Welcome to the home
of Wu Ch'En She.
310
00:21:13,500 --> 00:21:15,067
What a horrible place!
311
00:21:18,533 --> 00:21:22,833
A man in great debt must
sometimes live in seclusion
to cultivate longevity.
312
00:21:23,800 --> 00:21:25,900
Oh, Master Wu!
313
00:21:25,900 --> 00:21:27,800
Wu Ch'En She,
I bring friends.
314
00:21:29,267 --> 00:21:30,300
(SHOUTS)
315
00:21:32,567 --> 00:21:35,433
He seldom welcomes
his infrequent guests.
316
00:21:35,433 --> 00:21:38,567
Hey, what are you up to?
There's nobody down there.
317
00:21:39,867 --> 00:21:41,533
Are you sure?
318
00:21:41,533 --> 00:21:43,333
Yeah, I'm telling you, look.
319
00:21:44,267 --> 00:21:45,933
Well, we must
rectify that.
320
00:21:45,933 --> 00:21:47,300
(BOTH SCREAMING)
321
00:21:50,900 --> 00:21:52,067
(SCREAMING)
322
00:21:57,900 --> 00:21:59,833
Next time the cargo
could be sharks.
323
00:22:01,067 --> 00:22:02,367
(WOMEN CHATTERING)
324
00:22:04,833 --> 00:22:06,133
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
325
00:22:21,867 --> 00:22:23,800
A gift, dear friend.
326
00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:25,533
I'm gonna strangle you!
327
00:22:25,533 --> 00:22:29,900
You know, the Chinese find
the juice of the tomatoes
the only suitable antidote
328
00:22:29,900 --> 00:22:31,867
for the aromas of skunk,
329
00:22:31,867 --> 00:22:34,167
fish and putrefied flesh.
330
00:22:34,167 --> 00:22:36,067
When I get out of this tub,
331
00:22:36,067 --> 00:22:39,067
I'm going to beat you
like a red-headed stepchild.
332
00:22:39,067 --> 00:22:41,400
But why? I saved your life.
333
00:22:43,067 --> 00:22:45,500
I took you
to the Red Society,
334
00:22:45,500 --> 00:22:49,733
an organization with, uh,
with an ironic sense of humor.
335
00:22:49,733 --> 00:22:52,100
Had I delivered you
to the Green Society,
336
00:22:52,100 --> 00:22:54,167
they would have
slit your throat.
337
00:22:54,167 --> 00:22:56,133
Hung you up to drip
like a Peking duck.
338
00:22:57,467 --> 00:22:59,900
For looking for the father
of a wounded soldier?
339
00:23:03,133 --> 00:23:05,233
Mmm, interesting.
340
00:23:05,233 --> 00:23:07,467
Interesting?
What's so goddamn interesting?
341
00:23:08,933 --> 00:23:11,067
My dear friend,
Wu Ch'En She has no sons.
342
00:23:12,700 --> 00:23:14,533
So then why am I
looking for him?
343
00:23:16,867 --> 00:23:18,933
Perhaps you should
ask the pious lady.
344
00:23:25,933 --> 00:23:27,433
Every damn word
out of your mouth has
been a lie, hasn't it?
345
00:23:27,433 --> 00:23:28,767
I can explain.
346
00:23:28,767 --> 00:23:30,633
Yeah. There isn't
any brave little boy
347
00:23:30,633 --> 00:23:32,967
crying for Wu Ch'En She
at all, is there? Is there?
348
00:23:32,967 --> 00:23:36,167
Look me straight in the eye
and give me a one word answer.
349
00:23:36,167 --> 00:23:37,967
No, there isn't.
No, there isn't.
350
00:23:39,067 --> 00:23:41,533
A missionary lying!
351
00:23:41,533 --> 00:23:43,900
It's like pissing
all over God's uniform.
352
00:23:43,900 --> 00:23:45,867
If I had told you the truth,
you never would have agreed
to help us.
353
00:23:45,867 --> 00:23:47,167
Help you what?
354
00:23:47,167 --> 00:23:49,900
Mr. Wasey,
at this very moment,
tens of thousands of
355
00:23:49,900 --> 00:23:52,300
courageous soldiers are
suffering agonizing pain
356
00:23:52,300 --> 00:23:54,067
because of a terrible
shortage of morphine.
357
00:23:54,067 --> 00:23:56,433
And not one of them is
related to Wu Ch'En She.
358
00:23:56,433 --> 00:23:59,600
That's true, but a year ago
Wu Ch'En She betrayed
his master, Walter Faraday.
359
00:23:59,600 --> 00:24:02,167
Oh, hold the phone.
The Walter Faraday?
360
00:24:02,167 --> 00:24:04,067
Walter Faraday,
the Opium King?
361
00:24:04,067 --> 00:24:07,433
Well, anyway, they say
Wu stole 1,100 pounds of
opium from this Mr. Faraday.
362
00:24:07,433 --> 00:24:09,733
You're looking for
Faraday's flowers.
363
00:24:09,733 --> 00:24:12,533
You've heard of them?
364
00:24:12,533 --> 00:24:14,933
I've also heard of El Dorado
and the Lost Dutchman Mine.
365
00:24:14,933 --> 00:24:17,933
They don't exist either.
You're crazy, you know that?
366
00:24:17,933 --> 00:24:20,500
Do you know what they did
to Walter Faraday? Do you?
367
00:24:20,500 --> 00:24:22,167
Answer me, damn it!
368
00:24:22,167 --> 00:24:23,867
I can't.
369
00:24:23,867 --> 00:24:26,867
You smell so bad
I can't think straight.
370
00:24:26,867 --> 00:24:29,300
After they shot him,
drowned him and burnt him,
371
00:24:29,300 --> 00:24:31,200
they say he was
fished out of the river,
372
00:24:31,200 --> 00:24:33,200
skinned and deboned,
then hung up
373
00:24:33,200 --> 00:24:35,267
for everybody to see
on the Lower Nanking Road.
374
00:24:35,267 --> 00:24:36,667
That's only hearsay.
375
00:24:36,667 --> 00:24:38,700
Maybe so.
But if they'll do that
to an Opium King,
376
00:24:38,700 --> 00:24:40,067
can you imagine
what they're going to do
377
00:24:40,067 --> 00:24:41,733
to the Glow-in-the-dark
Tie King?
378
00:24:41,733 --> 00:24:44,133
I'll be seeing you,
Miss Tatlock.
379
00:24:44,133 --> 00:24:46,833
What about your ties?
What about 'em?
380
00:24:46,833 --> 00:24:50,167
Mr. Burns has them
stored at the mission.
381
00:24:50,167 --> 00:24:53,167
You're welcome to follow me
there, but please walk upwind.
382
00:25:09,500 --> 00:25:10,567
(SNIFFING)
383
00:25:16,567 --> 00:25:20,733
Oh, dear. I sense
you've encountered
the Red Society.
384
00:25:20,733 --> 00:25:22,733
I'm afraid he knows.
385
00:25:22,733 --> 00:25:24,933
No point in apologies, pal.
386
00:25:24,933 --> 00:25:26,333
I just want my stuff.
387
00:25:28,967 --> 00:25:30,900
You must think we're lunatics.
388
00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:37,233
Lunatics?
You're worse than lunatics.
389
00:25:37,233 --> 00:25:39,833
Two missionaries
and a Glow-in-the-dark
tie salesman
390
00:25:39,833 --> 00:25:41,733
do not just
stroll up to people
391
00:25:41,733 --> 00:25:44,933
and ask if they've seen
1,000 pounds of opium
lying around.
392
00:25:44,933 --> 00:25:47,633
I told you
we picked the wrong man.
393
00:25:47,633 --> 00:25:49,767
This time
they threw us in the fish.
394
00:25:49,767 --> 00:25:51,833
Next time we get grinded
into cat food.
395
00:25:52,967 --> 00:25:55,233
He's right, you know.
396
00:25:55,233 --> 00:25:57,600
I'm afraid we've been
hopelessly irresponsible.
397
00:25:59,833 --> 00:26:01,667
Perhaps this will
make up for it.
398
00:26:09,600 --> 00:26:11,067
A ticket?
399
00:26:11,067 --> 00:26:13,467
I paid your fare
to Los Angeles.
400
00:26:13,467 --> 00:26:16,867
Your captain will
welcome you back
with open arms.
401
00:26:16,867 --> 00:26:19,333
Your ship sails
the day after tomorrow.
402
00:26:19,333 --> 00:26:22,333
I booked a room for you
in the Hotel Penang.
403
00:26:22,333 --> 00:26:23,900
It's plain but adequate.
404
00:26:23,900 --> 00:26:26,700
And, uh,
here's a small contribution...
405
00:26:26,700 --> 00:26:28,533
(COUGHING)
406
00:26:28,533 --> 00:26:30,167
...towards your new clothes.
407
00:26:32,467 --> 00:26:34,533
WASEY: That's
mighty white of you, Burns.
408
00:26:40,067 --> 00:26:42,833
Do you have any plans
for this evening, Mr. Wasey?
409
00:26:42,833 --> 00:26:45,767
No. No, I don't.
410
00:26:45,767 --> 00:26:49,167
Well, we can't have you
leaving Shanghai without
tasting the duck.
411
00:26:49,167 --> 00:26:51,400
Will you have dinner
with me tonight?
412
00:26:51,400 --> 00:26:52,400
My treat.
413
00:27:00,900 --> 00:27:04,933
I hope you're not offended,
Mr. Wasey, but that new tie
is a major improvement.
414
00:27:04,933 --> 00:27:07,867
It's a little subdued for me.
Boy, this place looks great.
415
00:27:09,100 --> 00:27:10,533
Oh, we're not eating here.
416
00:27:10,533 --> 00:27:12,900
I've got something
more elegant in mind.
417
00:27:12,900 --> 00:27:15,333
(BAND PLAYING)
Your regular table?
418
00:27:15,333 --> 00:27:17,533
An old watering hole,
Mr. Wasey?
419
00:27:17,533 --> 00:27:19,600
I've never been here before.
I couldn't afford it
till I met you.
420
00:27:19,600 --> 00:27:21,067
PROSTITUTE:
Where have you been, Phil?
421
00:27:27,867 --> 00:27:29,067
May I join you?
422
00:27:29,833 --> 00:27:31,733
What are you doing here?
423
00:27:31,733 --> 00:27:34,567
Well, like you, Mr. Wasey,
I come for the duck,
424
00:27:34,567 --> 00:27:37,367
for the interesting people,
for the beautiful flowers.
425
00:27:38,167 --> 00:27:39,400
The usual, sir.
426
00:27:43,067 --> 00:27:45,300
Gin? I hate gin.
Give me whiskey.
427
00:27:45,300 --> 00:27:48,600
Naughty boy.
You tried to jilt us.
428
00:27:48,600 --> 00:27:50,600
Tried to jilt you?
We've missed you, cheri.
429
00:27:50,600 --> 00:27:52,800
Oh, you have?
I don't even know
who you are.
430
00:27:52,800 --> 00:27:54,567
I see you have
quite a following, Mr. Wasey.
431
00:27:54,567 --> 00:27:56,467
Beat it.
432
00:27:56,467 --> 00:27:58,933
Heavens above,
has the fetching Miss Tatlock
433
00:27:58,933 --> 00:28:01,067
taken up
the oldest profession?
434
00:28:01,067 --> 00:28:03,267
Don't be silly.
You have a following of
your own there, Tatlock.
435
00:28:03,267 --> 00:28:06,367
My God, Phil,
aren't you a sight
for sore eyes.
436
00:28:06,367 --> 00:28:08,800
My name is not Phil.
437
00:28:08,800 --> 00:28:11,933
No, you're quite right.
You're not Phil at all,
are you?
438
00:28:11,933 --> 00:28:15,200
Mr. Tuttle,
this is my friend, Mr. Wasey.
439
00:28:15,200 --> 00:28:17,167
Mr. Tuttle is
a distinguished journalist.
440
00:28:17,167 --> 00:28:19,067
He's also
the foremost authority
441
00:28:19,067 --> 00:28:20,967
on Walter Faraday in Shanghai.
442
00:28:21,967 --> 00:28:23,900
Oh, well, what a coincidence.
443
00:28:23,900 --> 00:28:25,367
Could this possibly
be the reason
444
00:28:25,367 --> 00:28:27,900
we're dining in this
charming establishment?
445
00:28:27,900 --> 00:28:30,733
I just didn't want
you to think we made
the whole thing up.
446
00:28:30,733 --> 00:28:34,233
Tell him, Willie.
Tell him the flowers
really do exist.
447
00:28:34,233 --> 00:28:37,067
Oh, they exist
all right, old boy.
I've seen them.
448
00:28:37,067 --> 00:28:39,400
Tell him where, Willie.
449
00:28:39,400 --> 00:28:41,600
Faraday's villa,
the night he was killed.
450
00:28:42,467 --> 00:28:44,767
Five crates of premium opium.
451
00:28:46,200 --> 00:28:49,533
My God,
you look like Phil Borak.
452
00:28:49,533 --> 00:28:51,233
You know,
I hadn't the foggiest idea
how to help you before,
453
00:28:51,233 --> 00:28:53,400
but now I've seen Mr. Wasey.
454
00:28:53,400 --> 00:28:55,867
I think she'd be amused.
Don't you, Kronk?
455
00:28:55,867 --> 00:28:58,933
I think she'd be fascinated.
456
00:28:58,933 --> 00:29:00,767
Who? Who?
457
00:29:00,767 --> 00:29:02,733
I'd like to introduce you
to a remarkable woman.
458
00:29:02,733 --> 00:29:05,800
She trained as
an imperial concubine.
459
00:29:05,800 --> 00:29:08,067
I'm sorry, but Mr. Wasey
isn't here to participate...
No, wait.
460
00:29:08,067 --> 00:29:11,933
She is very selective
and he is definitely her type.
461
00:29:11,933 --> 00:29:13,500
And she works
off the premises.
462
00:29:13,500 --> 00:29:15,367
But we don't have
the time or the money.
463
00:29:15,367 --> 00:29:17,967
She believes
she's an empress.
464
00:29:17,967 --> 00:29:21,200
The fortunate patron
becomes her emperor.
465
00:29:23,967 --> 00:29:27,300
An emperor?
I absolutely forbid this!
466
00:29:27,300 --> 00:29:30,167
Her name is China Doll
and she's Walter Faraday's
mistress.
467
00:29:32,800 --> 00:29:35,533
How much will it cost
and when can we pay
our first visit?
468
00:29:49,133 --> 00:29:50,400
This could be a setup.
469
00:29:50,400 --> 00:29:51,933
Don't be silly.
I'm not.
470
00:29:51,933 --> 00:29:54,533
Tuttle could be on some
gang's payroll. Kronk, too.
471
00:29:54,533 --> 00:29:57,367
Then why would they agree
to help us and then
turn around and hurt us?
472
00:29:57,367 --> 00:29:58,533
Everybody else has.
473
00:29:58,533 --> 00:29:59,500
(SIGHS)
474
00:30:04,300 --> 00:30:05,433
Oh, too bad.
475
00:30:07,033 --> 00:30:08,833
I guess we've got to go back.
476
00:30:12,667 --> 00:30:13,833
(EXHALING)
477
00:30:24,867 --> 00:30:26,933
Where did you learn that?
In missionary school?
478
00:30:26,933 --> 00:30:28,600
No.
479
00:30:28,600 --> 00:30:31,533
An exclusive girls' school
with an extremely
strict curfew.
480
00:30:37,167 --> 00:30:38,333
(CAT MEOWS)
481
00:31:45,100 --> 00:31:47,967
It says, "Welcome, Mr. Wasey."
482
00:31:47,967 --> 00:31:49,567
Bon voyage.
Have a nice trip.
483
00:31:51,767 --> 00:31:53,733
I've changed my mind.
I'm not going.
484
00:31:56,267 --> 00:31:58,200
It's the last thing
I'll ever ask of you.
485
00:31:58,200 --> 00:31:59,267
I promise.
486
00:32:01,567 --> 00:32:03,600
You look sincere,
and you sound sincere,
487
00:32:03,600 --> 00:32:05,567
and you're lying
through your teeth.
488
00:32:06,467 --> 00:32:07,833
Well, then,
489
00:32:09,733 --> 00:32:12,067
you leave me no alternative.
490
00:32:12,067 --> 00:32:14,067
That's my ticket.
491
00:32:14,067 --> 00:32:15,967
Where did you get that?
492
00:32:15,967 --> 00:32:17,467
You picked my pocket.
493
00:32:17,467 --> 00:32:20,100
I certainly did
and I'm quite prepared
to tear it up.
494
00:32:20,100 --> 00:32:21,533
Oh, you wouldn't do that.
495
00:32:21,533 --> 00:32:23,100
Yes, I would.
496
00:32:23,100 --> 00:32:25,633
You have no idea
of the depth of
my determination.
497
00:32:26,433 --> 00:32:28,067
(SPEAKING IN MANDARIN)
498
00:32:28,067 --> 00:32:29,833
(BREATH AWAY FROM HEAVEN
PLAYING)
499
00:32:35,967 --> 00:32:38,833
Now I know why cannibals
like to barbeque missionaries.
500
00:32:53,800 --> 00:32:58,800
* And I was captured
by her loneliness
501
00:33:03,900 --> 00:33:08,467
* A wounded tiger
on a willowy path
502
00:33:11,133 --> 00:33:13,933
* Like an opalescent moon
all alone
503
00:33:13,933 --> 00:33:17,633
* In the sky of a foreign land
504
00:33:17,633 --> 00:33:19,567
* Ooh, ooh
505
00:33:19,567 --> 00:33:22,300
* She can take the breath
506
00:33:22,300 --> 00:33:25,900
* Away from heaven
507
00:34:06,967 --> 00:34:08,633
I see you admire Yehonala.
508
00:34:16,133 --> 00:34:17,467
Was she a queen?
509
00:34:20,433 --> 00:34:23,433
The Emperor fell
in love with Yehonala
510
00:34:23,433 --> 00:34:25,700
in the heavenly gardens
of the Summer Palace.
511
00:34:27,433 --> 00:34:28,967
She bore his only son.
512
00:34:30,567 --> 00:34:32,767
When the Emperor died,
513
00:34:32,767 --> 00:34:35,633
Yehonala was elevated
to Empress Dowager.
514
00:34:39,667 --> 00:34:41,467
(BREATH AWAY FROM HEAVEN
PLAYING)
515
00:34:51,133 --> 00:34:52,267
Attend him.
516
00:35:03,667 --> 00:35:06,167
* In another life
517
00:35:08,733 --> 00:35:14,267
* I woke up dreaming
with a sigh
518
00:35:16,200 --> 00:35:19,067
* As the morning light
519
00:35:21,367 --> 00:35:26,200
* Was painting
whispers of a joy
520
00:35:28,567 --> 00:35:30,667
Take one.
It will assist you.
521
00:35:33,267 --> 00:35:34,567
(CHUCKLES)
522
00:35:34,567 --> 00:35:36,833
Well, I don't need
any assistance.
523
00:35:36,833 --> 00:35:38,200
Can you be certain?
524
00:35:39,833 --> 00:35:41,333
I'm fit as a fiddle.
525
00:35:42,967 --> 00:35:46,967
My mistress is well-schooled
in such ceremonial acts as
526
00:35:46,967 --> 00:35:51,067
The West Wind,
The Wounded Tiger,
The Willow Path,
527
00:35:52,067 --> 00:35:54,333
The Chair,
The Obedient Wife.
528
00:35:57,233 --> 00:36:00,233
She has also mastered
the six blown
breath stimulants,
529
00:36:01,500 --> 00:36:04,067
the eight
shallow penetrations,
530
00:36:04,067 --> 00:36:06,833
the nine minor
and 11 major positions,
531
00:36:08,167 --> 00:36:11,833
as well as the technique
of passive acceptance,
532
00:36:11,833 --> 00:36:15,733
forceful dominance,
contortion and mobile union.
533
00:36:47,600 --> 00:36:52,433
* And I was captured
by her loneliness
534
00:36:57,600 --> 00:37:02,167
* A wounded tiger
on a willowy path
535
00:37:04,867 --> 00:37:08,400
* Like an iridescent moon
all alone
536
00:37:08,400 --> 00:37:10,067
* In the sky of
a foreign land
537
00:37:13,767 --> 00:37:19,333
* She can move your soul
without you knowing
538
00:37:22,167 --> 00:37:27,567
* She can take your breath
away from heaven *
539
00:37:32,067 --> 00:37:35,800
A good concubine always
paints a whisper of pleasure
to come upon her emperor.
540
00:38:05,933 --> 00:38:07,733
Do you know what this means?
541
00:38:11,200 --> 00:38:12,200
Horse.
542
00:38:14,800 --> 00:38:16,400
Now you must paint on me.
543
00:38:28,767 --> 00:38:30,733
Do you know
the symbol for the whip?
544
00:38:31,633 --> 00:38:32,400
Whip?
545
00:38:35,067 --> 00:38:35,900
I'll try.
546
00:38:57,333 --> 00:39:03,633
Tonight we shall begin
with the whip and the horse.
547
00:39:07,067 --> 00:39:07,800
Whip?
548
00:39:11,067 --> 00:39:12,700
Where are we going to find
a whip at this time of night?
549
00:39:12,700 --> 00:39:14,400
(LAUGHS)
550
00:39:14,400 --> 00:39:17,300
Where else,
but at the end of
the horse's tail.
551
00:39:18,567 --> 00:39:19,633
(EXCLAIMS)
552
00:39:22,633 --> 00:39:23,600
(MOANS)
553
00:40:10,633 --> 00:40:12,600
(DOOR CREAKS)
554
00:40:12,600 --> 00:40:14,800
Mr. Wasey, do you know
what time it is?
555
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:21,900
Uh, late for breakfast
or early for lunch.
556
00:40:21,900 --> 00:40:24,600
It is precisely 7:33 a.m.
and I'd like a full report.
557
00:40:25,733 --> 00:40:27,567
No, you wouldn't.
558
00:40:27,567 --> 00:40:29,767
What did you find out
about Walter Faraday?
559
00:40:29,767 --> 00:40:30,800
Walter who?
560
00:40:31,500 --> 00:40:32,300
Oh.
561
00:40:32,800 --> 00:40:33,867
(CHUCKLES)
562
00:40:36,333 --> 00:40:37,500
Nothing.
563
00:40:37,500 --> 00:40:39,500
Nothing?
564
00:40:39,500 --> 00:40:42,000
Well, then,
exactly what did you do
for eight hours?
565
00:40:42,000 --> 00:40:43,100
Everything.
566
00:40:44,467 --> 00:40:45,800
That's revolting.
567
00:40:47,733 --> 00:40:50,367
I was having such a good time
I almost forgot my own name
568
00:40:50,367 --> 00:40:52,700
until I walked in here just
now and you said "Mr. Wasey."
569
00:40:52,700 --> 00:40:54,400
(LAUGHS)
570
00:40:54,400 --> 00:40:57,100
Then I suggest you march
straight back there
for another meeting.
571
00:40:57,100 --> 00:40:58,133
No, ma'am.
572
00:40:59,500 --> 00:41:01,067
I'm tired, I'm hungry.
573
00:41:01,067 --> 00:41:02,600
I'm gonna go out
and get a huge breakfast,
574
00:41:02,600 --> 00:41:04,067
then I'm gonna come,
and I'm gonna lay in that bed
575
00:41:04,067 --> 00:41:06,133
and I'm gonna get a good rest.
576
00:41:06,133 --> 00:41:08,067
And if certain people
let me sleep,
577
00:41:09,333 --> 00:41:11,200
then I might consider
your request.
578
00:41:13,800 --> 00:41:16,067
Mr. Kronk!
579
00:41:16,067 --> 00:41:18,133
Did you miss anything?
Would you like us
to repeat it for you?
580
00:41:18,133 --> 00:41:19,833
Please, dear friend,
we must talk at once.
581
00:41:19,833 --> 00:41:21,400
Yeah, talk to her.
I'm going to breakfast.
582
00:41:21,400 --> 00:41:24,600
But I have urgent information,
only ten Shanghai dollars.
583
00:41:25,800 --> 00:41:28,100
Mr. Wasey,
you don't understand.
584
00:41:28,100 --> 00:41:30,933
It could save your life.
They may kill you.
585
00:41:30,933 --> 00:41:32,833
Look, I love you, Kronk,
but you're standing
between me and my mission.
586
00:41:32,833 --> 00:41:34,567
What do you mean?
587
00:41:34,567 --> 00:41:36,200
I'm going to have those
nice cops over there guide me
588
00:41:36,200 --> 00:41:37,567
to the best
breakfast joint in town.
589
00:41:37,567 --> 00:41:39,133
Oh, no, no, no, no,
you mustn't.
590
00:41:39,133 --> 00:41:40,900
Next time I see you,
I'll set you up
with a nice tie.
591
00:41:40,900 --> 00:41:42,333
(POLICEMAN YELLING)
592
00:41:44,067 --> 00:41:45,533
(YELLING IN MANDARIN)
Oh, no.
593
00:41:56,067 --> 00:41:57,867
Please bring
Mr. Wasey a chair.
594
00:41:58,933 --> 00:42:00,433
Mr. Wasey doesn't
want a chair.
595
00:42:00,433 --> 00:42:03,500
He wants to know
what the hell is
going on here.
596
00:42:03,500 --> 00:42:05,967
I'm not interested
in your questions, Mr. Wasey.
597
00:42:08,067 --> 00:42:11,100
Only your answers.
598
00:42:15,600 --> 00:42:19,600
I'm minding my own business
and your guys haul me off
like a common pickpocket.
599
00:42:19,600 --> 00:42:22,333
Last night you went to see
a woman named China Doll.
600
00:42:26,067 --> 00:42:28,700
Yes or no?
601
00:42:28,700 --> 00:42:31,633
Why should I
tell you anything?
Who the hell are you?
602
00:42:31,633 --> 00:42:35,600
All you need to know
is that I'm a person
603
00:42:35,600 --> 00:42:39,100
who can cause you
intense pain.
604
00:42:43,067 --> 00:42:46,367
I'm an American citizen.
I got a passport registered
with the U.S. Consulate.
605
00:42:46,367 --> 00:42:47,433
(CHUCKLES)
606
00:42:52,200 --> 00:42:56,433
There was once an emperor
named Cheng Wang who ruled
during the Chin Dynasty.
607
00:42:56,433 --> 00:42:58,667
His police caught
a peddler stealing roses
608
00:42:58,667 --> 00:43:01,800
from the royal gardens
one afternoon.
609
00:43:01,800 --> 00:43:04,867
They chopped off his head
on the spot.
610
00:43:04,867 --> 00:43:07,367
When the emperor heard
about the incident,
611
00:43:07,367 --> 00:43:10,167
he was furious
at the leniency
of the sentence.
612
00:43:19,633 --> 00:43:22,067
Come on. Wait, look.
613
00:43:24,567 --> 00:43:25,967
I'll tell you anything
you want to know.
614
00:43:25,967 --> 00:43:27,667
Indeed you will, Mr. Wasey.
615
00:43:28,767 --> 00:43:30,833
But we must be certain
it's the truth.
616
00:43:33,467 --> 00:43:36,067
In your country
they have a saying
that an alert person
617
00:43:36,067 --> 00:43:37,967
is someone who is
always on his toes.
618
00:43:39,700 --> 00:43:43,733
Let us hope that you have
a talent for remaining
on your toes.
619
00:44:01,100 --> 00:44:01,900
Okay.
620
00:44:03,267 --> 00:44:05,067
I did visit China Doll
last night.
621
00:44:06,133 --> 00:44:07,067
Why?
622
00:44:13,167 --> 00:44:15,567
I can't hear you, Mr. Wasey.
623
00:44:17,133 --> 00:44:18,800
Flowers. Faraday's flowers.
624
00:44:19,433 --> 00:44:20,800
Explain.
625
00:44:20,800 --> 00:44:22,400
(CREAKING)
626
00:44:22,400 --> 00:44:24,233
Opium. 1,000 pounds.
Five crates.
627
00:44:29,967 --> 00:44:30,967
(LAUGHS)
628
00:44:40,067 --> 00:44:42,067
Thank God you're all right.
629
00:44:42,067 --> 00:44:44,467
Mr. Kronk and I have been
worried sick about you.
630
00:44:47,300 --> 00:44:49,733
You are all right,
aren't you, Mr. Wasey?
631
00:44:49,733 --> 00:44:52,100
Go away. I'm sick.
632
00:44:52,100 --> 00:44:54,967
Mr. Kronk knew
the police were after you.
He tried to...
633
00:44:58,600 --> 00:45:00,100
You're drunk, aren't you?
634
00:45:00,100 --> 00:45:02,300
Oh, I am that. Yeah.
635
00:45:02,300 --> 00:45:04,733
Go get under the shower
and sober up.
636
00:45:04,733 --> 00:45:05,800
Oh, my gosh.
637
00:45:07,533 --> 00:45:09,200
Did the police
do this to you?
638
00:45:10,433 --> 00:45:12,100
They looked like police.
639
00:45:14,300 --> 00:45:16,100
It must have been the police.
640
00:45:16,100 --> 00:45:19,233
That's what Mr. Kronk
came to warn you about.
641
00:45:19,233 --> 00:45:21,100
He had heard that they were
concerned about our
interest in the flowers.
642
00:45:21,100 --> 00:45:23,067
Yeah, the bastard probably
told them himself.
643
00:45:24,067 --> 00:45:25,467
Ah!
644
00:45:25,467 --> 00:45:27,733
They wouldn't resort
to such barbaric tactics
645
00:45:27,733 --> 00:45:28,967
if we weren't
on the right track.
And tonight...
646
00:45:28,967 --> 00:45:30,933
Oh yeah. The right track
or wrong track, I'm out of it.
647
00:45:30,933 --> 00:45:33,400
And tonight when you have
your second meeting
with China Doll,
648
00:45:33,400 --> 00:45:35,067
we'll have our breakthrough.
649
00:45:35,067 --> 00:45:36,100
Tonight,
650
00:45:37,467 --> 00:45:39,433
I'm going to be
laying right here.
651
00:45:43,900 --> 00:45:47,300
Finding the opium is
the most important thing
I'll ever do.
652
00:45:47,300 --> 00:45:49,267
I can't find it
without your help.
653
00:45:49,267 --> 00:45:52,533
I'm not budging
till tomorrow afternoon
654
00:45:52,533 --> 00:45:55,433
where I sail out
of your life forever.
655
00:45:55,433 --> 00:45:57,967
Please, Mr. Wasey,
I give you my word.
656
00:45:59,700 --> 00:46:02,367
I'll never ask you to put
yourself in danger again.
657
00:46:03,200 --> 00:46:04,833
I'll drink to that.
658
00:46:04,833 --> 00:46:06,433
You'll have to volunteer.
659
00:46:09,300 --> 00:46:11,200
I don't volunteer
to pass the salt.
660
00:46:13,067 --> 00:46:15,833
You've got to help me.
You've just got to.
661
00:46:23,700 --> 00:46:25,067
What are you doing?
662
00:46:26,133 --> 00:46:27,500
You leave me no alternative
663
00:46:27,500 --> 00:46:29,267
but to put you
under obligation.
664
00:46:32,100 --> 00:46:34,333
(LAUGHING) No, no.
665
00:46:34,333 --> 00:46:36,667
No, you don't. No, no.
You're not thinking.
666
00:46:38,633 --> 00:46:40,533
You're bluffing, Miss Tatlock.
667
00:46:42,700 --> 00:46:45,867
I'm merely placing you
under the obligation
to continue helping me.
668
00:46:47,500 --> 00:46:50,200
Is this something else
you picked up
in missionary school?
669
00:46:52,100 --> 00:46:53,867
Well, go all the way.
670
00:46:53,867 --> 00:46:56,067
Go ahead. It won't do you
an ounce of good.
671
00:46:57,733 --> 00:47:00,067
You're wasting...
672
00:47:00,067 --> 00:47:02,267
You're wasting your time.
I'm not gonna look.
673
00:47:12,967 --> 00:47:16,700
Could we please
get on with this, Mr. Wasey?
We have a lot to do today.
674
00:47:16,700 --> 00:47:19,100
No. Sorry. I had more fun
when I had the mumps.
675
00:47:27,633 --> 00:47:29,167
I'm waiting, Mr. Wasey.
676
00:47:31,900 --> 00:47:34,900
You can wait all day,
but I refuse to be
put under obligation.
677
00:47:41,400 --> 00:47:43,600
That doesn't obligate me
one little bit.
678
00:47:46,967 --> 00:47:47,767
No.
679
00:47:55,467 --> 00:47:58,433
You know, it's very pleasant,
but I'm still not obligated.
680
00:48:07,067 --> 00:48:08,667
I am a man of steel.
681
00:48:15,767 --> 00:48:18,267
(WHIMPERING)
682
00:48:18,267 --> 00:48:20,667
What did you say, Mr. Wasey?
I can't hear you.
683
00:48:26,967 --> 00:48:28,167
Oh, no.
684
00:48:29,100 --> 00:48:30,267
Louder, please.
685
00:48:30,267 --> 00:48:32,133
I'm obligated. I'm obligated.
686
00:48:53,133 --> 00:48:54,500
Hey, watch it
with that stuff.
687
00:48:54,500 --> 00:48:57,100
It'll tear a hole
in your stomach.
688
00:48:57,100 --> 00:48:59,500
Good, maybe it'll balance
the hole in my head.
689
00:49:03,700 --> 00:49:04,900
Oh, Mr. Wasey,
690
00:49:07,433 --> 00:49:09,667
I've messed up everything.
691
00:49:09,667 --> 00:49:11,400
No, you were an angel.
692
00:49:12,133 --> 00:49:13,800
Angel?
693
00:49:13,800 --> 00:49:15,933
I just blackmailed you
shamelessly.
694
00:49:17,933 --> 00:49:20,400
Well, don't knock shameless.
You were great.
695
00:49:22,500 --> 00:49:25,233
Mr. Wasey, I release you
from your obligation.
696
00:49:31,367 --> 00:49:34,567
You mean no more China Doll?
No more Faraday's flowers?
Nothing?
697
00:49:34,567 --> 00:49:35,700
(HICCUPPING)
698
00:49:35,700 --> 00:49:36,933
Absolutely.
699
00:49:38,100 --> 00:49:39,267
(SCREAMING)
700
00:49:39,267 --> 00:49:40,333
Miss Tatlock!
701
00:49:40,333 --> 00:49:41,700
(DUCKS QUACKING)
702
00:49:43,267 --> 00:49:44,467
(SNICKERS)
703
00:49:45,367 --> 00:49:46,800
It's not funny!
704
00:49:51,067 --> 00:49:53,900
Well, this isn't going to do
much for my reputation.
705
00:49:53,900 --> 00:49:55,867
Most girls reach
for a cigarette,
706
00:49:55,867 --> 00:49:57,567
one or two have
left in a huff,
707
00:49:58,900 --> 00:50:00,067
but nobody,
708
00:50:02,100 --> 00:50:04,567
nobody has ever jumped
out the window before.
709
00:50:04,567 --> 00:50:06,633
You know, I could have
stayed home in Brookline,
Massachusetts,
710
00:50:06,633 --> 00:50:09,067
and married a nice
Ivy League banker.
711
00:50:09,067 --> 00:50:10,600
Why didn't you?
712
00:50:10,600 --> 00:50:12,500
The whole country's
standing in a breadline
713
00:50:12,500 --> 00:50:15,833
and I just wanted to
do something useful.
714
00:50:15,833 --> 00:50:18,733
Look how I wind up,
with a bunch of chickens.
715
00:50:19,800 --> 00:50:21,067
They're ducks.
716
00:50:21,067 --> 00:50:22,433
(SOBBING)
717
00:50:22,433 --> 00:50:25,633
Oh, maybe
your luck is changing.
718
00:50:27,167 --> 00:50:29,800
I intend to honor
my obligation.
719
00:50:29,800 --> 00:50:33,833
No, I just couldn't let
myself ask you to do
another thing for me.
720
00:50:33,833 --> 00:50:36,733
But still I got to insist.
I'm a man of my word.
721
00:50:36,733 --> 00:50:39,800
I mean, you've done
enough for me already.
722
00:50:39,800 --> 00:50:42,700
Miss Tatlock...
I will not have you
seeing that woman again.
723
00:50:44,233 --> 00:50:45,800
I won't have to.
724
00:50:45,800 --> 00:50:48,400
You don't really think
I spent all that time
725
00:50:48,400 --> 00:50:51,400
with China Doll
without asking her about
Walter Faraday, do you?
726
00:50:56,100 --> 00:50:57,900
It was a delicate subject.
727
00:51:00,633 --> 00:51:03,233
I had to pick
just the right moment
to bring it on.
728
00:51:03,233 --> 00:51:05,167
(MOANING)
729
00:51:05,167 --> 00:51:07,467
Don't stop. Oh, God!
Don't stop. Don't stop.
730
00:51:08,367 --> 00:51:10,367
Wasey,
731
00:51:10,367 --> 00:51:12,300
don't you think
it's time for you
732
00:51:12,300 --> 00:51:14,633
to ask me about
the true purpose
of your visit?
733
00:51:15,667 --> 00:51:17,567
Now?
734
00:51:17,567 --> 00:51:21,367
What better time
for two people
to reveal the truth?
735
00:51:22,967 --> 00:51:25,500
The truth? What truth?
736
00:51:25,500 --> 00:51:28,400
The truth about
Faraday's flowers.
737
00:51:28,400 --> 00:51:31,367
Oh, that. What about 'em?
738
00:51:31,967 --> 00:51:34,067
(MOANS)
739
00:51:34,067 --> 00:51:37,467
They say the flowers
were stolen by a servant,
740
00:51:40,300 --> 00:51:41,767
Wu Ch'En She.
741
00:51:43,933 --> 00:51:45,467
I knew that already.
742
00:51:48,800 --> 00:51:50,300
Perhaps I can help you.
743
00:51:51,600 --> 00:51:52,633
Later.
744
00:51:54,367 --> 00:51:55,867
Later you may forget.
745
00:51:57,300 --> 00:52:00,833
When Walter insisted
I leave Shanghai with him,
746
00:52:00,833 --> 00:52:01,933
Wu hid me.
747
00:52:02,767 --> 00:52:04,933
And in return,
748
00:52:04,933 --> 00:52:07,533
I arranged a buyer
for the opium
he would steal.
749
00:52:08,633 --> 00:52:11,200
His name is Joe Go.
750
00:52:13,233 --> 00:52:15,133
Joe Go?
Where do I find this Joe Go?
751
00:52:15,133 --> 00:52:16,767
Mmm, later, Wasey.
752
00:52:18,200 --> 00:52:20,933
(MOANS)
753
00:52:20,933 --> 00:52:23,700
TATLOCK: Well, for heaven's
sakes, did she tell you
where to find this Joe Go?
754
00:52:26,933 --> 00:52:28,700
Glendon, I'm talking to you.
755
00:52:30,067 --> 00:52:31,733
Oh. Um...
756
00:52:31,733 --> 00:52:33,133
(CLEARS THROAT)
757
00:52:33,133 --> 00:52:35,533
Well, of course she told me
where to find him.
758
00:52:35,533 --> 00:52:38,767
Why didn't you tell me before?
759
00:52:38,767 --> 00:52:41,867
Quite frankly, Miss Tatlock,
I couldn't stand you before.
760
00:52:43,233 --> 00:52:44,200
(LAUGHS)
761
00:53:14,900 --> 00:53:16,333
You are Mr. Wasey?
762
00:53:17,167 --> 00:53:18,067
Yeah.
763
00:53:18,867 --> 00:53:20,267
Joe Go awaits you.
764
00:53:27,633 --> 00:53:29,067
Joe Go,
a regular Dizzy Dean, huh?
765
00:53:29,067 --> 00:53:30,167
(LAUGHS)
766
00:53:34,167 --> 00:53:35,700
What do you think?
You ever see Dizzy pitch?
767
00:53:35,700 --> 00:53:37,467
Sure.
768
00:53:37,467 --> 00:53:39,300
I saw him beat the Reds
on the Fourth of July
at Crosley Field.
769
00:53:39,300 --> 00:53:41,100
Fantastic!
770
00:53:41,100 --> 00:53:43,600
So what's a nice
all-American boy like you
771
00:53:43,600 --> 00:53:46,933
want with 1,000 pounds
of opium, huh?
772
00:53:46,933 --> 00:53:51,233
Would you believe that's
what it takes to get back
to Los Angeles these days?
773
00:53:51,233 --> 00:53:53,433
China Doll said
you have a pretty face
774
00:53:53,433 --> 00:53:56,200
and I should tell you
all I know about
Faraday's flowers.
775
00:53:56,200 --> 00:53:58,400
Okay.
776
00:53:58,400 --> 00:54:01,233
About a year ago Joe Go
put up big down payment
777
00:54:01,233 --> 00:54:05,133
so Wu Ch'en She
can deliver five crates
of super Grade A opium.
778
00:54:05,133 --> 00:54:07,733
Only crates turn
into five loads of
super grade A bricks
779
00:54:07,733 --> 00:54:10,567
and one small ball
of Faraday's opium.
780
00:54:10,567 --> 00:54:13,167
Someone pulled a switch.
Wu Ch'En She?
781
00:54:13,167 --> 00:54:14,900
Definitely not Wu.
782
00:54:14,900 --> 00:54:17,300
Joe Go have Yamagani San
beat Wu to a pulp.
783
00:54:18,467 --> 00:54:20,533
No, if someone
make the switch,
784
00:54:20,533 --> 00:54:22,500
Joe Go bet on Faraday.
785
00:54:24,933 --> 00:54:26,133
What was that?
786
00:54:27,067 --> 00:54:28,700
Very hot item.
787
00:54:28,700 --> 00:54:31,833
Joe Go call it
Shanghai Surprise.
788
00:54:33,233 --> 00:54:36,433
See. Stockpiling's
hell of a damn good business.
789
00:54:36,433 --> 00:54:37,567
Look.
790
00:54:37,567 --> 00:54:39,633
Coca-Cola, Budweiser,
791
00:54:39,633 --> 00:54:42,800
Gillette Blue Blades.
Opium, penny ante business.
792
00:54:44,833 --> 00:54:47,667
Do you think
the flowers still exist?
793
00:54:47,667 --> 00:54:51,733
Joe Go ask himself,
"If flowers don't exist,
why does Wu still exist?"
794
00:54:51,733 --> 00:54:53,167
You mean he's really alive?
795
00:54:53,167 --> 00:54:54,933
Could we speak to him?
796
00:54:54,933 --> 00:54:57,300
Tell you what,
Joe Go out his down payment.
797
00:54:58,500 --> 00:55:00,367
You want to speak to Wu?
798
00:55:00,367 --> 00:55:02,200
You take Joe Go
off the hook. Okay?
799
00:55:02,200 --> 00:55:03,833
Okay.
800
00:55:03,833 --> 00:55:04,900
Let's see.
801
00:55:05,633 --> 00:55:08,067
I have, uh, $38.
802
00:55:08,067 --> 00:55:10,833
Sister, $38 may
get you ten cartons of
Lucky Strike Greens,
803
00:55:10,833 --> 00:55:12,900
but Joe Go is in hole
for 12,000 big ones.
804
00:55:15,833 --> 00:55:18,067
I might have something
worth more than that.
805
00:55:42,533 --> 00:55:45,533
Jo Go know fastball,
curveball, change-up,
806
00:55:45,533 --> 00:55:47,700
even the elusive screwball.
807
00:55:47,700 --> 00:55:49,967
But what the hell was
this wondrous pitch?
808
00:55:51,600 --> 00:55:52,800
A knuckleball.
809
00:55:54,500 --> 00:55:57,233
Ah, yes. Word of this magic
has come to Joe Go's ears.
810
00:55:58,933 --> 00:56:00,300
You will teach me?
811
00:56:02,533 --> 00:56:04,433
After you bring us
to Wu Ch'En She.
812
00:56:05,767 --> 00:56:06,767
Teach first.
813
00:56:20,700 --> 00:56:21,967
(SPEAKING MANDARIN)
814
00:56:29,467 --> 00:56:30,833
I'd stay here if I were you.
815
00:56:30,833 --> 00:56:32,400
Don't be silly.
816
00:56:32,400 --> 00:56:34,433
This could be
the end of our search.
817
00:56:36,067 --> 00:56:37,167
Okay, let's go.
818
00:56:37,167 --> 00:56:38,367
(MAN COUGHING)
819
00:56:41,233 --> 00:56:42,600
(PEOPLE CHATTERING)
820
00:56:53,533 --> 00:56:54,800
(SPEAKING MANDARIN)
821
00:57:23,067 --> 00:57:24,333
(SPEAKING MANDARIN)
822
00:57:33,700 --> 00:57:35,067
Hey!
Hey!
823
00:57:35,067 --> 00:57:36,933
Give me my purse back!
824
00:57:36,933 --> 00:57:38,333
(TATLOCK SCREAMING)
825
00:57:41,133 --> 00:57:42,400
Glen!
826
00:57:42,400 --> 00:57:43,867
(ALL CLAMORING)
827
00:57:43,867 --> 00:57:44,667
Glen!
828
00:57:46,833 --> 00:57:48,067
(WU YELLING)
829
00:58:16,067 --> 00:58:17,400
Are you Wu Ch'En She?
830
00:58:20,433 --> 00:58:21,600
(MAN COUGHING)
831
00:58:25,167 --> 00:58:26,900
Where are Faraday's flowers?
832
00:58:37,100 --> 00:58:38,733
Who did this to you? Who?
833
00:58:40,933 --> 00:58:42,233
(SPEAKING MANDARIN)
834
00:58:44,500 --> 00:58:49,200
I'm not sure, but I think
it means "The last phoenix."
Whatever that is.
835
00:58:49,200 --> 00:58:52,867
Well, in Chinese mythology,
the phoenix has always been
a symbol of benevolence.
836
00:58:52,867 --> 00:58:55,967
What puzzles me is
why you were tortured.
837
00:58:55,967 --> 00:58:58,867
It's just that,
since the occupation,
838
00:58:58,867 --> 00:59:02,633
the police have stopped
torturing people except for
purely political reasons.
839
00:59:02,633 --> 00:59:04,633
That makes sense.
840
00:59:04,633 --> 00:59:05,967
I mean, this guy stopped
stretching my neck
841
00:59:05,967 --> 00:59:07,667
the minute I mentioned opium.
842
00:59:08,800 --> 00:59:10,733
Sadistic no-hands bastard.
843
00:59:10,733 --> 00:59:11,667
(CHOKING)
844
00:59:20,067 --> 00:59:22,433
No hands? Are you certain?
845
00:59:22,433 --> 00:59:24,500
Well, it's pretty hard
to make a mistake
about a thing like that.
846
00:59:24,500 --> 00:59:27,467
I saw a Chinese officer
called Mei Gan
847
00:59:27,467 --> 00:59:30,300
have his hands blown off
the night Walter was killed.
848
00:59:30,300 --> 00:59:32,833
Like everyone else,
I've always thought
849
00:59:32,833 --> 00:59:36,100
that the bad blood
between those two
had to do with the opium.
850
00:59:36,100 --> 00:59:37,700
But looking back
on the meticulous way
851
00:59:37,700 --> 00:59:39,767
he searched that money belt,
852
00:59:39,767 --> 00:59:43,767
it's entirely possible
the dispute between them
had to do with something else.
853
00:59:43,767 --> 00:59:47,400
There was a warlord
in the North who became
an outlaw.
854
00:59:49,400 --> 00:59:51,067
His name was also Mei Gan.
855
00:59:54,067 --> 00:59:56,400
You know everything,
don't you, Kronk?
I beg your pardon?
856
00:59:56,400 --> 00:59:58,067
Yeah, you know
when the police
want to see me,
857
00:59:58,067 --> 01:00:00,067
you know
where to get insurance,
you know who is who.
858
01:00:00,067 --> 01:00:02,033
You probably know
how many damn freckles
I have on my ass!
859
01:00:02,033 --> 01:00:04,233
Glendon!
What's the matter with you?
860
01:00:04,233 --> 01:00:05,433
Him! He's what's
the matter with me.
861
01:00:05,433 --> 01:00:07,867
I mean, who is this guy?
What does he want?
862
01:00:07,867 --> 01:00:10,000
I should be happy
to answer you, Mr. Wasey.
863
01:00:12,867 --> 01:00:16,500
I think you're a very
enterprising individual.
864
01:00:16,500 --> 01:00:20,533
I have no doubt whatsoever
that you will accomplish
your task.
865
01:00:20,533 --> 01:00:23,300
I am just as certain
that in some small way
866
01:00:23,300 --> 01:00:25,633
I will help you
achieve your goal.
867
01:00:25,633 --> 01:00:30,067
And if I am correct,
I expect to be rewarded.
868
01:00:30,067 --> 01:00:31,933
As I'm sure
Mr. Tuttle here
869
01:00:31,933 --> 01:00:34,633
expects fair payment
for services rendered.
870
01:00:34,633 --> 01:00:36,533
After all, dear boy,
871
01:00:36,533 --> 01:00:38,633
it was I that
introduced you
to China Doll.
872
01:00:40,400 --> 01:00:42,567
We're The Helping Hand,
873
01:00:42,567 --> 01:00:44,867
not Handouts Anonymous.
874
01:00:44,867 --> 01:00:46,667
Come on,
let's get out of here.
875
01:00:59,433 --> 01:01:01,167
I wish you'd give up
this opium business
876
01:01:01,167 --> 01:01:03,200
and just go back
to saving souls.
877
01:01:03,200 --> 01:01:06,767
Mr. Wasey, believe me,
I'm not some little lamb
who's lost in the woods.
878
01:01:06,767 --> 01:01:09,167
No, you're not lost in woods,
you're lost in a jungle.
879
01:01:09,167 --> 01:01:11,200
Shanghai is the most
dangerous city...
880
01:01:13,433 --> 01:01:15,067
See what I mean?
881
01:01:15,067 --> 01:01:16,400
Joe Go awaits you.
882
01:01:21,067 --> 01:01:24,067
Well, you can just tell Joe Go
to await us a little longer,
okay?
883
01:01:24,067 --> 01:01:24,967
(GRUNTS)
884
01:01:27,167 --> 01:01:28,567
Joe Go await you now!
885
01:01:32,133 --> 01:01:34,567
Looks like we're in for
a little night baseball.
886
01:01:38,600 --> 01:01:40,733
Hey, Big Stick!
Joe Go on pins and needles.
887
01:01:42,067 --> 01:01:45,067
What did old Hookah Head
have to say, huh?
888
01:01:45,067 --> 01:01:48,933
Well, he blinked a few times,
blew a few smoke rings
889
01:01:48,933 --> 01:01:51,833
and whistled a mean chorus
of Beat Me, Daddy,
Eight to the Bar.
890
01:01:51,833 --> 01:01:55,200
Don't throw Joe Go
curveball, Big Stick!
891
01:01:55,200 --> 01:01:58,067
Just explain what he said
about monkey business
around neck.
892
01:01:59,567 --> 01:02:01,767
Tell him, Glen.
What have we got to lose?
893
01:02:04,700 --> 01:02:06,767
All he said was,
"The last phoenix."
894
01:02:09,267 --> 01:02:10,567
Son of a gun.
895
01:02:10,567 --> 01:02:12,567
Yeah, something to do
with Chinese mythology.
896
01:02:12,567 --> 01:02:14,533
(CHUCKLES) Mythology?
897
01:02:14,533 --> 01:02:16,600
Joe Go, student of
Chinese mythology shit.
898
01:02:17,667 --> 01:02:19,600
Phoenix, huh? Okay.
899
01:02:21,767 --> 01:02:25,967
First phoenix come up to bat
during the reign of Huang-ti,
Yellow Emperor.
900
01:02:25,967 --> 01:02:28,100
Phoenix come up
to bat last time
901
01:02:28,100 --> 01:02:30,133
when it scratch
at grave of Hung-wu,
902
01:02:30,133 --> 01:02:32,567
first emperor
of the Ming.
903
01:02:32,567 --> 01:02:35,067
Scratched at
the emperor's... It doesn't
mean anything, does it?
904
01:02:35,067 --> 01:02:37,767
Wu not only junkie, but,
uh, crazy as a bedbug.
905
01:02:37,767 --> 01:02:39,967
(CHUCKLING)
906
01:02:39,967 --> 01:02:42,267
Oh, Joe Go
very, very sorry
about bump on head.
907
01:02:43,333 --> 01:02:45,333
But just pretend
it was wild pitch.
908
01:02:46,267 --> 01:02:47,567
Okey-dokey.
909
01:02:47,567 --> 01:02:48,467
Let's go.
910
01:02:55,067 --> 01:02:58,067
Well, Miss Tatlock,
I guess this is the end
of the line for me.
911
01:02:58,067 --> 01:02:59,900
What time does your boat
leave tomorrow?
912
01:02:59,900 --> 01:03:01,167
4:00.
913
01:03:02,767 --> 01:03:05,067
I'll try to get
down to the docks
to see you off.
914
01:03:09,067 --> 01:03:10,067
(GROANS)
915
01:03:13,067 --> 01:03:14,433
Well, I'd like that.
916
01:03:23,800 --> 01:03:25,367
I better take this taxi.
917
01:03:25,967 --> 01:03:26,867
(SIGHS)
918
01:03:36,100 --> 01:03:37,200
Miss Tatlock,
919
01:03:39,700 --> 01:03:43,067
do you ever wonder about
what might have happened
if we had met someplace else?
920
01:03:43,067 --> 01:03:44,833
The bar at the
Coconut Grove or...
921
01:03:46,133 --> 01:03:48,500
Oh, make it a church picnic,
Easter Sunday.
922
01:03:48,500 --> 01:03:49,600
(GIGGLING)
923
01:03:51,367 --> 01:03:53,833
You've never been
to a church picnic
in your life.
924
01:03:55,333 --> 01:03:57,467
That's right, I haven't.
925
01:03:57,467 --> 01:03:58,433
Thank Burns for me,
all right?
926
01:03:58,433 --> 01:03:59,667
For what?
927
01:03:59,667 --> 01:04:02,600
For the intro.
928
01:04:02,600 --> 01:04:06,067
If it hadn't been for him,
we never would have met
in a million years.
929
01:04:07,933 --> 01:04:08,733
Wait.
930
01:04:10,467 --> 01:04:12,567
Oh. I'm sorry.
931
01:04:16,233 --> 01:04:17,667
I don't mind.
932
01:04:17,667 --> 01:04:18,733
(SOMEPLACE ELSE PLAYING)
933
01:04:18,733 --> 01:04:22,067
* I hope you won't let go
934
01:04:22,067 --> 01:04:24,933
* Maybe you'll let me know
935
01:04:26,567 --> 01:04:30,933
* That you'll be saddened
like you've never been
936
01:04:30,933 --> 01:04:33,333
* Regretting that we'll leave
937
01:04:35,733 --> 01:04:40,200
* And for a while
I could comfort you
938
01:04:40,200 --> 01:04:42,933
* And hold you for some time
939
01:04:45,267 --> 01:04:50,067
* I need you now
to be beside me
940
01:04:50,067 --> 01:04:54,533
* While all my world
is sad and crazy
941
01:04:54,533 --> 01:04:56,400
* Loneliness
942
01:04:58,333 --> 01:05:01,200
* Empty faces
943
01:05:01,200 --> 01:05:03,867
* Wish I could leave them all
944
01:05:03,867 --> 01:05:05,833
* In someplace else
945
01:05:13,667 --> 01:05:16,833
Good evening, Mr. Wasey.
946
01:05:16,833 --> 01:05:18,933
We regret the necessity
for the hostile behavior,
947
01:05:18,933 --> 01:05:22,200
but we didn't feel
you'd receive us
cordially.
948
01:05:22,200 --> 01:05:25,067
I'm so sorry.
I really do abhor these
nasty little things.
949
01:05:25,067 --> 01:05:27,833
You better keep it on me
or I'm gonna have to
kick you out of here.
950
01:05:27,833 --> 01:05:30,633
As you wish. We'll get
straight to the point.
951
01:05:30,633 --> 01:05:33,300
After dinner...
We went to
Mr. Tuttle's newspaper
952
01:05:33,300 --> 01:05:35,233
and looked up Mei Gan
in the morgue.
953
01:05:36,400 --> 01:05:37,167
Look.
954
01:05:42,367 --> 01:05:45,333
WASEY:
That's the son-of-a-bitch
before he lost his hands.
955
01:05:45,333 --> 01:05:47,900
But...
But look at the headline
on that clipping.
956
01:05:47,900 --> 01:05:51,767
"Did This Man
Loot the Royal Tombs?"
957
01:05:51,767 --> 01:05:56,800
It would appear that Mei Gan
added grave robbing to
his repertoire of activities.
958
01:05:58,333 --> 01:06:01,067
Would you care to guess
who Mei Gan is sitting with?
959
01:06:06,733 --> 01:06:08,600
You tell me.
960
01:06:08,600 --> 01:06:10,700
My dear departed friend,
Walter Faraday.
961
01:06:12,400 --> 01:06:13,567
Wait a minute.
962
01:06:15,633 --> 01:06:19,067
They say the last phoenix
scratched at
the emperor's grave.
963
01:06:19,067 --> 01:06:20,867
So, if Mei Gan
also robbed graves,
964
01:06:20,867 --> 01:06:22,833
that would be why Wu'd
call him the last phoenix.
965
01:06:22,833 --> 01:06:23,867
Very good.
966
01:06:25,567 --> 01:06:27,633
And one of the graves
he plundered
967
01:06:27,633 --> 01:06:29,567
was the tomb
of the Empress Tzu Hsi.
968
01:06:31,567 --> 01:06:36,133
The Empress Tzu Hsi
was also known by her
family name, Yehonala.
969
01:06:36,133 --> 01:06:37,067
Yehonala?
970
01:06:39,933 --> 01:06:41,067
(CHUCKLING)
971
01:06:43,667 --> 01:06:45,233
Boys, I owe you a dinner.
972
01:06:47,233 --> 01:06:48,633
(DOOR OPENS)
973
01:06:48,633 --> 01:06:49,733
(DOOR SHUTS)
974
01:06:53,400 --> 01:06:56,967
WASEY: I have come
to ask something
only Yehonala would know.
975
01:06:56,967 --> 01:07:00,600
What treasures
did the warlord Mei Gan
plunder from your tomb?
976
01:07:00,600 --> 01:07:03,833
Do you think
I would reveal to you
what I have told no one else
977
01:07:03,833 --> 01:07:06,833
merely because you resemble
someone I once cared for?
978
01:07:06,833 --> 01:07:08,600
Not at all. I'm hoping
you'd tell me
979
01:07:08,600 --> 01:07:11,800
so that I can
convince some good people
they're chasing a rainbow.
980
01:07:14,067 --> 01:07:16,633
The desecrator Mei Gan
stole everything.
981
01:07:20,233 --> 01:07:23,600
Yehonala's paintings,
swords, scrolls,
982
01:07:26,167 --> 01:07:30,067
my porcelain dreams
and my heavenly gardens.
983
01:07:31,233 --> 01:07:33,467
Heavenly gardens?
A flower garden?
984
01:07:35,233 --> 01:07:36,833
A bouquet
of beautiful violets.
985
01:07:42,300 --> 01:07:43,600
Stems, emeralds.
986
01:07:45,200 --> 01:07:47,233
The buds, rubies.
987
01:07:47,233 --> 01:07:48,633
The leaves, diamonds.
988
01:07:49,567 --> 01:07:51,067
Faraday's flowers.
989
01:07:51,067 --> 01:07:52,467
Yehonala's flowers.
990
01:07:55,067 --> 01:07:56,833
Faraday stole them
from Mei Gan.
991
01:07:59,567 --> 01:08:02,067
Walter was persuaded
to retrieve from a thief
992
01:08:03,233 --> 01:08:05,067
what always belonged
to Yehonala.
993
01:08:07,633 --> 01:08:08,667
All right.
994
01:08:10,467 --> 01:08:13,400
I'll tell my friends only
that the opium does not exist.
995
01:08:14,867 --> 01:08:17,633
Yehonala has done me
a great service.
996
01:08:17,633 --> 01:08:19,333
She also makes me very sad.
997
01:08:20,233 --> 01:08:21,433
Why sad, Wasey?
998
01:08:23,167 --> 01:08:24,433
I've met Mei Gan.
999
01:08:26,067 --> 01:08:29,867
He'll stop at nothing
to get back what
Faraday took from him.
1000
01:08:29,867 --> 01:08:32,167
He'll come after you.
1001
01:08:32,167 --> 01:08:33,833
Mei Gan came to me
a year ago,
1002
01:08:34,900 --> 01:08:36,200
after Walter died.
1003
01:08:45,733 --> 01:08:47,067
He did this to me.
1004
01:09:06,067 --> 01:09:07,400
(SPEAKING MANDARIN)
1005
01:09:07,400 --> 01:09:08,267
Okay.
1006
01:09:18,500 --> 01:09:19,500
(GUNSHOT)
1007
01:09:32,067 --> 01:09:34,600
You've been a most
resourceful young man.
1008
01:09:34,600 --> 01:09:36,267
I commend you.
1009
01:09:36,267 --> 01:09:37,700
Look, whatever
you want to know,
I'll tell you.
1010
01:09:37,700 --> 01:09:39,500
(SCOFFS)
1011
01:09:39,500 --> 01:09:42,400
You've not only
mastered the enigma
of Chinese mythology,
1012
01:09:42,400 --> 01:09:44,700
but judging from where
you've just come,
1013
01:09:44,700 --> 01:09:48,633
I suspect you've also
solved the mystery
of the Heavenly Gardens.
1014
01:09:48,633 --> 01:09:51,900
Look, it was opium
I was after, not jewels.
1015
01:09:51,900 --> 01:09:54,367
4:00 this afternoon,
I'm on my way
back to Los Angeles.
1016
01:09:54,367 --> 01:09:56,467
Oh. How do you
intend to travel?
1017
01:09:56,467 --> 01:09:58,400
By steamship
or burlap sack?
1018
01:10:00,067 --> 01:10:01,400
You've got
to be kidding.
1019
01:10:01,400 --> 01:10:04,233
I assure you
if your answer
is burlap sack,
1020
01:10:04,233 --> 01:10:06,067
I can accommodate
you immediately.
1021
01:10:06,067 --> 01:10:07,633
Steamship, of course.
1022
01:10:07,633 --> 01:10:09,433
Good. Then you are
free to embark
1023
01:10:10,833 --> 01:10:13,300
the moment you return
the Heavenly Gardens to me.
1024
01:10:14,833 --> 01:10:17,567
You know who has them.
Why can't you just get them?
1025
01:10:17,567 --> 01:10:21,333
Because the lady is immune
to my methods of persuasion.
1026
01:10:21,333 --> 01:10:22,867
So what makes you think
I'm going to be
more successful?
1027
01:10:22,867 --> 01:10:24,300
I mean, she's crazy.
1028
01:10:25,300 --> 01:10:26,900
She thinks
she's an empress.
1029
01:10:30,800 --> 01:10:31,733
(SIGHS)
1030
01:10:39,600 --> 01:10:42,067
In your country
when two men
conclude a deal,
1031
01:10:42,067 --> 01:10:44,233
I believe it's customary
to shake hands.
1032
01:10:48,167 --> 01:10:50,600
Don't be impolite, Mr. Wasey.
It would offend me.
1033
01:11:00,967 --> 01:11:02,067
(GROANING)
1034
01:11:12,067 --> 01:11:13,067
No opium?
1035
01:11:14,500 --> 01:11:16,167
My source was so reliable.
1036
01:11:18,700 --> 01:11:22,400
I can't believe that
Faraday's flowers was
merely a bunch of jewels.
1037
01:11:22,400 --> 01:11:23,967
Merely a bunch of jewels?
1038
01:11:25,167 --> 01:11:26,067
Jesus Christ!
1039
01:11:29,133 --> 01:11:32,133
Would you...
Tell him, we've hit
the jackpot here.
1040
01:11:32,133 --> 01:11:35,467
Mr. Burns, those jewels
can buy more opium
than we've ever dreamed of.
1041
01:11:35,467 --> 01:11:38,233
We are missionaries,
Miss Tatlock.
1042
01:11:38,233 --> 01:11:41,800
We're not in the business
of fencing stolen property.
1043
01:11:41,800 --> 01:11:44,733
Well, we can't turn our back
on those suffering men.
1044
01:11:44,733 --> 01:11:47,700
She won't just
hand you the jewels.
1045
01:11:47,700 --> 01:11:50,167
From what you've told us,
this woman's crazy.
1046
01:11:50,167 --> 01:11:54,067
Look, so she's crazy. Maybe
she's just crazy enough...
1047
01:11:54,067 --> 01:11:57,833
Maybe she's just crazy enough
to buy some sermon
about saving her army.
1048
01:11:59,367 --> 01:12:01,800
At least she's willing
to meet Miss Tatlock.
1049
01:12:03,533 --> 01:12:05,200
(SIGHS)
1050
01:12:05,200 --> 01:12:09,067
Well, it's highly
unconventional, but go.
1051
01:12:10,167 --> 01:12:11,733
Go, with my blessings.
1052
01:12:22,933 --> 01:12:26,167
Has Yehonala
given any thought
to my proposal?
1053
01:12:26,167 --> 01:12:28,367
I must ask your friend
a question, Wasey.
1054
01:12:29,467 --> 01:12:31,533
You say you wish
to help my country.
1055
01:12:33,100 --> 01:12:36,533
Why should my jewels be used
to buy the opium drug
1056
01:12:36,533 --> 01:12:37,800
instead of guns?
1057
01:12:39,400 --> 01:12:42,300
Guns cause pain.
Opium eases pain.
1058
01:13:12,733 --> 01:13:17,100
I stripped the empress
of the original glass stones,
1059
01:13:17,100 --> 01:13:19,100
painted the jewels
and sewed them on.
1060
01:13:22,933 --> 01:13:23,867
A ruby.
1061
01:13:36,100 --> 01:13:37,133
Thank you.
1062
01:13:40,967 --> 01:13:42,600
Now you must go.
1063
01:13:45,100 --> 01:13:48,100
You will not be safe
until you dispose of
the Heavenly Gardens.
1064
01:13:50,667 --> 01:13:54,100
You know, you've really done
a wonderful thing, Glen.
1065
01:13:54,100 --> 01:13:56,067
I hope you always
feel that way.
1066
01:13:56,067 --> 01:13:58,333
Why wouldn't I?
1067
01:13:58,333 --> 01:14:01,067
Sometimes
things look different
in the light of day.
1068
01:14:22,900 --> 01:14:24,833
Will you miss China Doll,
Mr. Wasey?
1069
01:14:26,600 --> 01:14:28,333
Uh-oh.
Oh, it's only the police.
1070
01:14:30,433 --> 01:14:32,100
(GASPS)
What are we going to do?
1071
01:14:32,100 --> 01:14:33,767
Give ourselves up,
I guess.
1072
01:14:37,200 --> 01:14:40,267
No. I'm not going with him.
He's a gangster.
1073
01:14:40,267 --> 01:14:42,433
Better hop in, Big Stick.
You've got big trouble.
1074
01:14:42,433 --> 01:14:44,767
Help me, Joe Go.
The man has lost his mind.
1075
01:14:47,267 --> 01:14:48,200
Go! Go!
1076
01:14:53,233 --> 01:14:54,700
(SHOUTING IN MANDARIN)
1077
01:15:03,767 --> 01:15:05,400
Stop! Let's go!
Let's get away!
1078
01:15:28,700 --> 01:15:30,233
Going somewhere,
Mr. Wasey?
1079
01:15:31,833 --> 01:15:33,300
Hey there, good buddy.
1080
01:15:34,700 --> 01:15:36,233
I was just looking for you.
1081
01:15:36,233 --> 01:15:38,433
It did not appear
that way to me.
1082
01:15:38,433 --> 01:15:40,800
You were trying to get away
with your friends.
1083
01:15:42,233 --> 01:15:44,933
(CHUCKLES) No, no, no, no.
These are not my friends.
1084
01:15:45,800 --> 01:15:47,067
They abducted me.
1085
01:15:47,967 --> 01:15:49,600
I'm relieved.
1086
01:15:49,600 --> 01:15:52,633
I was beginning to think
a handshake meant
nothing to you.
1087
01:15:52,633 --> 01:15:56,100
No. I'm a man of my word,
and a deal is a deal.
1088
01:15:56,767 --> 01:15:58,967
Deal? What deal?
1089
01:15:58,967 --> 01:16:00,467
A very generous deal.
1090
01:16:01,900 --> 01:16:03,500
Yeah, a real bargain, see.
1091
01:16:04,933 --> 01:16:07,833
I get him the jewels
and he lets me stay alive.
1092
01:16:07,833 --> 01:16:11,167
You deceitful jelly-spined
backstabbing bastard.
1093
01:16:12,633 --> 01:16:15,267
You didn't learn that
in Brookline, Massachusetts.
1094
01:16:15,267 --> 01:16:18,633
No. I got it from associating
with... With pricks like you!
1095
01:16:18,633 --> 01:16:20,433
MEI GAN: Enough of this.
1096
01:16:20,433 --> 01:16:23,167
Now, Mr. Wasey, you will
kindly return to me
what is mine.
1097
01:16:24,800 --> 01:16:25,833
Be glad to.
1098
01:16:34,067 --> 01:16:36,367
I was sure it was...
Did... Did I give it to you?
1099
01:16:36,367 --> 01:16:38,967
No, you rat,
you took them from me.
1100
01:16:38,967 --> 01:16:41,100
You should pray
you haven't deceived me.
1101
01:16:41,100 --> 01:16:42,133
Permit us.
1102
01:16:53,300 --> 01:16:54,833
Hey, easy on the shirt.
1103
01:17:00,367 --> 01:17:02,900
Nothing in it, Mei Gan.
Just personal junk.
1104
01:17:04,500 --> 01:17:07,800
Family pictures,
picture of my mom, dog.
1105
01:17:12,900 --> 01:17:14,067
You open it.
1106
01:17:15,200 --> 01:17:16,133
(SIGHS)
1107
01:17:17,300 --> 01:17:19,367
There's nothing in it.
1108
01:17:19,367 --> 01:17:22,967
My handicap makes it difficult
to test your honesty. Open it!
1109
01:17:22,967 --> 01:17:24,700
Okay, but it's
a waste of time.
1110
01:17:30,833 --> 01:17:32,233
My little black book.
1111
01:17:35,233 --> 01:17:36,800
My membership,
Peking YMCA.
1112
01:17:39,267 --> 01:17:41,400
And my...
Oh, my library card's
expired. Damn.
1113
01:17:43,067 --> 01:17:44,067
And my
1114
01:17:45,200 --> 01:17:46,567
Lone Ranger badge.
1115
01:17:55,067 --> 01:17:56,200
Silk stockings.
1116
01:17:57,700 --> 01:17:59,533
(SIGHS)
1117
01:17:59,533 --> 01:18:01,967
You're never lonely
with a pair
of silk stockings.
1118
01:18:04,600 --> 01:18:05,700
Hershey bar.
1119
01:18:20,867 --> 01:18:22,133
This is pictures.
1120
01:18:23,067 --> 01:18:24,767
That's it.
That's everything.
1121
01:18:26,900 --> 01:18:29,433
One more compartment,
Mr. Wasey.
1122
01:18:33,733 --> 01:18:36,067
Now, I know that
that looks promising,
1123
01:18:36,067 --> 01:18:37,900
but there are nothing
but mothballs in there,
I assure you.
1124
01:18:37,900 --> 01:18:38,933
Open it!
1125
01:18:41,900 --> 01:18:42,800
(SIGHS)
1126
01:18:43,967 --> 01:18:45,133
Suit yourself.
1127
01:18:57,833 --> 01:18:59,767
See?
Mothballs.
1128
01:19:07,700 --> 01:19:10,833
Don't be sore,
old buddy. Okay?
1129
01:19:10,833 --> 01:19:13,600
There are just times
that you can't get
what you want
1130
01:19:13,600 --> 01:19:16,367
by stringing people up
by the neck,
1131
01:19:16,367 --> 01:19:19,533
or bullying them
into double-crossing
someone they care about.
1132
01:19:22,300 --> 01:19:24,300
Or even pulling out
their fingernails,
1133
01:19:24,300 --> 01:19:27,200
you sorry sadistic
son-of-a-bitch.
1134
01:19:27,200 --> 01:19:29,433
How dare you talk
to Mei Gan like that!
1135
01:19:30,600 --> 01:19:32,733
I timed that speech
to last just that long!
1136
01:19:32,733 --> 01:19:33,700
Come on!
1137
01:19:35,933 --> 01:19:37,333
(TATLOCK SCREAMING)
1138
01:19:41,800 --> 01:19:43,133
TATLOCK:
I forgot I can't swim.
1139
01:19:43,133 --> 01:19:44,167
(COUGHING)
1140
01:20:03,333 --> 01:20:06,567
I was worried about you
when you picked up
that Shanghai Surprise.
1141
01:20:06,567 --> 01:20:08,500
You were slick, Big Stick.
Really slick.
1142
01:20:08,500 --> 01:20:10,300
Thanks.
1143
01:20:10,300 --> 01:20:12,500
Too bad the jewels
went up in smoke, huh?
1144
01:20:12,500 --> 01:20:14,667
Yeah, better them than us.
Better neither.
1145
01:20:22,367 --> 01:20:24,367
TATLOCK: Oh, my gosh!
Give them to me.
1146
01:20:26,867 --> 01:20:28,267
Joe Go, can you take us
to the mission?
1147
01:20:28,267 --> 01:20:30,467
I'll deliver them personally.
1148
01:20:30,467 --> 01:20:32,133
Hey!
1149
01:20:32,133 --> 01:20:35,700
Stockpiling is great,
but robbery is better.
Thanks, Big Stick.
1150
01:20:35,700 --> 01:20:38,500
I do not accept this!
I do not accept this!
1151
01:20:40,167 --> 01:20:41,200
(LAUGHING)
1152
01:20:44,933 --> 01:20:46,433
You give those
back to me!
1153
01:20:47,400 --> 01:20:48,633
Sister, you always...
1154
01:20:48,633 --> 01:20:50,533
(GROANING)
1155
01:20:50,533 --> 01:20:52,767
How's that for a ball game,
you little creep?
1156
01:20:53,500 --> 01:20:54,700
Come on...
1157
01:20:54,700 --> 01:20:56,033
(TATLOCK SCREAMING)
1158
01:20:59,100 --> 01:21:00,567
God damn it!
1159
01:21:02,067 --> 01:21:03,567
Now what's the matter?
1160
01:21:05,200 --> 01:21:07,200
If I had had
that kind of control
when I needed it,
1161
01:21:07,200 --> 01:21:08,933
I'd be pitching
for the Yankees now
1162
01:21:08,933 --> 01:21:10,833
instead of selling
crummy painted ties.
1163
01:21:13,533 --> 01:21:15,067
(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)
1164
01:21:18,433 --> 01:21:19,800
Thank God you're safe.
1165
01:21:19,800 --> 01:21:20,900
We did it.
1166
01:21:21,767 --> 01:21:22,933
(BOTH LAUGHING)
1167
01:21:24,133 --> 01:21:25,267
It's a miracle.
1168
01:21:27,067 --> 01:21:28,067
Hello.
1169
01:21:30,267 --> 01:21:32,167
Come on, fellas,
not again.
1170
01:21:32,167 --> 01:21:34,833
Don't be offended, old boy.
We're only looking after
our own interests.
1171
01:21:34,833 --> 01:21:38,400
And it would appear
our timing is immaculate.
1172
01:21:41,333 --> 01:21:45,600
Brothers, I don't suppose
an appeal from a humble
servant of the Lord
1173
01:21:45,600 --> 01:21:48,867
could move your sense
of compassion and humility.
1174
01:21:48,867 --> 01:21:49,767
Oh, bugger off,
you old fart.
1175
01:21:52,700 --> 01:21:53,900
That's a shame.
1176
01:21:55,533 --> 01:21:56,567
(GRUNTING)
1177
01:21:58,300 --> 01:21:59,333
Mr. Burns?
1178
01:22:02,233 --> 01:22:04,333
(GROANING)
1179
01:22:04,333 --> 01:22:07,200
That's for trying
to stick me up, Willie.
1180
01:22:07,200 --> 01:22:09,667
And that's the time
you nearly left me to drown.
1181
01:22:22,067 --> 01:22:24,900
Poor Willie. He never
had a gift for larceny.
1182
01:22:26,500 --> 01:22:28,667
Miss Tatlock,
if I were you, I'd sit down.
1183
01:22:30,067 --> 01:22:32,100
I think you've just
witnessed a resurrection.
1184
01:22:32,100 --> 01:22:34,767
Oh, nothing so dramatic.
1185
01:22:34,767 --> 01:22:38,333
Plucked from the sea by
a timely fisherman's net,
1186
01:22:38,333 --> 01:22:41,167
and a year in Osaka
to patch myself up
and plan my return.
1187
01:22:43,733 --> 01:22:45,967
Mr. Burns.
You're not Mr. Burns.
1188
01:22:47,533 --> 01:22:51,767
No, ma'am.
I'm just an ex-opium king
1189
01:22:51,767 --> 01:22:55,833
who stole some jewels
for a lovely lady
who refused to return them.
1190
01:22:55,833 --> 01:22:59,067
So I had to solicit
some outside help,
1191
01:22:59,067 --> 01:23:00,900
and heaven dealt me
a winning hand.
1192
01:23:00,900 --> 01:23:01,900
Yeah, me.
1193
01:23:04,233 --> 01:23:06,533
Because I looked like
somebody that China Doll
was once in love with.
1194
01:23:06,533 --> 01:23:08,633
Right.
1195
01:23:08,633 --> 01:23:10,267
And now, Mr. Wasey,
I don't want to miss my boat.
1196
01:23:10,267 --> 01:23:13,067
Will you kindly hand over
that ticket that I gave you?
1197
01:23:14,567 --> 01:23:16,367
I earned that ticket.
Hand it over.
1198
01:23:25,100 --> 01:23:28,067
Thank you. And now move.
Go on, both of you. Move.
1199
01:23:33,767 --> 01:23:35,900
Now, Jack, in your box.
1200
01:23:37,733 --> 01:23:38,900
You, too, Jill.
1201
01:23:44,367 --> 01:23:46,067
I can't.
My skirt's too tight.
1202
01:23:50,933 --> 01:23:51,867
Get in.
1203
01:23:53,833 --> 01:23:55,067
Come on...
Get in!
1204
01:24:04,167 --> 01:24:07,300
Faraday, just one thing.
Was there ever any opium?
1205
01:24:07,300 --> 01:24:09,800
Sure. Just like I told you.
1,100 pounds.
1206
01:24:11,100 --> 01:24:13,067
One day some lucky sap
will find it.
1207
01:24:27,767 --> 01:24:29,467
See you in church, suckers.
1208
01:24:31,400 --> 01:24:33,467
WASEY: Goddamn phony
missionary con artist.
1209
01:24:35,267 --> 01:24:37,967
TATLOCK:
Stop swearing and
get us out of this!
1210
01:24:37,967 --> 01:24:40,267
Well, you're the expert
on picking locks.
1211
01:24:40,267 --> 01:24:41,967
Okay. How's this?
1212
01:24:52,800 --> 01:24:53,600
Damn!
1213
01:24:55,267 --> 01:24:57,100
Jiggle your crate,
it'll fall out.
1214
01:25:01,333 --> 01:25:02,367
(GRUNTING)
1215
01:25:10,067 --> 01:25:11,500
Maybe I can
knock it free.
1216
01:25:26,467 --> 01:25:27,700
(BOTH SHOUTING)
1217
01:25:33,133 --> 01:25:36,967
TATLOCK: Of all the
incompetent, irresponsible,
mindless things to do!
1218
01:25:36,967 --> 01:25:41,333
And I'm still stuck in here!
Somebody get me out of here!
1219
01:25:46,500 --> 01:25:48,200
Who are you?
1220
01:25:48,200 --> 01:25:49,900
I'm Mr. Burns.
1221
01:25:49,900 --> 01:25:53,533
You're not Mr. Burns.
Mr. Burns just took...
Well, see, he wasn't really...
1222
01:25:54,900 --> 01:25:56,533
You're Mr. Burns.
1223
01:25:56,533 --> 01:25:58,400
And you must be Miss Tatlock.
1224
01:25:58,400 --> 01:26:01,300
I was told you'd be here
when I returned
from the mission in Peking.
1225
01:26:01,300 --> 01:26:03,467
We're expecting
great things of you.
1226
01:26:03,467 --> 01:26:05,267
Yeah, well, give me
half an hour and you
won't be disappointed.
1227
01:26:05,267 --> 01:26:06,333
WASEY: Hey!
1228
01:26:14,167 --> 01:26:17,133
Broken every bone
in my body.
1229
01:26:17,133 --> 01:26:22,233
You... You know, Miss Tatlock,
The Helping Hand is opposed
to these Eastern practices.
1230
01:26:22,233 --> 01:26:23,667
Don't knock it
till you've tried it, pal.
1231
01:26:25,767 --> 01:26:27,233
(SPEAKING MANDARIN)
1232
01:26:41,267 --> 01:26:42,233
(HUMMING)
1233
01:26:50,933 --> 01:26:52,667
Wait!
What's the matter?
1234
01:26:52,667 --> 01:26:53,900
He's got a gun.
1235
01:27:33,767 --> 01:27:35,567
You two must be
related to Houdini.
1236
01:27:36,500 --> 01:27:38,067
Don't come any closer.
1237
01:27:40,067 --> 01:27:42,933
You're very welcome
to those little baubles.
1238
01:27:42,933 --> 01:27:44,900
Really. I'm happy for you
to have them.
1239
01:27:47,067 --> 01:27:50,100
Except I doubt if
they'd cover the price
of a Chinese dinner.
1240
01:27:50,100 --> 01:27:52,233
Don't listen to him.
He's trying to trick us.
1241
01:27:52,233 --> 01:27:53,800
We've all been tricked.
1242
01:27:58,933 --> 01:28:01,867
You know how tough
diamonds are supposed to be?
1243
01:28:01,867 --> 01:28:02,800
Allow me.
1244
01:28:16,533 --> 01:28:18,367
You have to hand it
to China Doll.
1245
01:28:20,300 --> 01:28:23,467
It's the third time
she's outfoxed me.
1246
01:28:23,467 --> 01:28:25,467
First she gets me
to steal the damn things,
1247
01:28:25,467 --> 01:28:27,200
then she leaves me
to Mei Gan,
1248
01:28:27,200 --> 01:28:28,667
and now she heads
for the hills
a rich lady,
1249
01:28:28,667 --> 01:28:31,600
and leaves me
with this bag of rubbish.
1250
01:28:31,600 --> 01:28:33,133
But I've always
been a pushover
1251
01:28:33,133 --> 01:28:35,267
for somebody who
beat me at my own game.
1252
01:28:50,067 --> 01:28:51,233
Your turn.
1253
01:28:51,233 --> 01:28:52,533
It's very therapeutic.
1254
01:28:52,533 --> 01:28:54,300
Rid you of
a lot of frustration.
1255
01:29:04,100 --> 01:29:05,800
Look, kids,
1256
01:29:05,800 --> 01:29:08,200
it's finished here
in Shanghai.
1257
01:29:08,200 --> 01:29:11,900
Party's over.
It's time to pack up
and go home.
1258
01:29:11,900 --> 01:29:15,267
There's plenty of room.
We could all bunk together.
1259
01:29:15,267 --> 01:29:17,467
Well, maybe he's right.
What do you think?
1260
01:29:20,433 --> 01:29:23,500
If you think you're still
going to find that opium,
forget it.
1261
01:29:23,500 --> 01:29:25,633
Faraday's flowers
are just a wilted memory.
1262
01:29:28,233 --> 01:29:30,533
Perhaps I'll stay on here
a while.
1263
01:29:30,533 --> 01:29:32,800
And do what?
1264
01:29:32,800 --> 01:29:35,933
I could give being
a missionary a try.
1265
01:29:35,933 --> 01:29:38,133
You mean no drinking,
no gambling, no whoring?
1266
01:29:38,133 --> 01:29:39,800
My boy, I've tried it.
It's hell on earth.
1267
01:29:41,200 --> 01:29:42,967
(MAN SHOUTING IN MANDARIN)
1268
01:29:42,967 --> 01:29:44,533
Ah, the last call.
1269
01:29:51,700 --> 01:29:53,067
I better be going.
1270
01:29:59,800 --> 01:30:01,800
I hope you make
a killing on your ties.
1271
01:30:07,767 --> 01:30:08,867
Miss Tatlock.
1272
01:30:10,700 --> 01:30:13,800
From now on,
I'm gonna try like hell
to live up to my obligations.
1273
01:30:17,633 --> 01:30:19,600
But I'll never be
as good at it as you.
1274
01:30:20,300 --> 01:30:21,633
Goodbye, Glendon.
1275
01:30:29,000 --> 01:30:30,433
My boy, you made
the right decision.
1276
01:30:30,433 --> 01:30:33,167
She's a nice girl,
but who needs nice girls?
1277
01:30:33,167 --> 01:30:35,333
Now, I'm going to
finish my shave,
take a shower,
1278
01:30:35,333 --> 01:30:37,633
then we'll break open
that bottle of bubbly.
1279
01:30:39,733 --> 01:30:42,267
She's right, you know.
1280
01:30:42,267 --> 01:30:45,700
You're gonna make a killing
with those crates.
1281
01:30:45,700 --> 01:30:48,600
What with
my connections in LA,
you're gonna be a rich man.
1282
01:30:51,233 --> 01:30:53,067
Do you hear me?
1283
01:30:53,067 --> 01:30:54,500
I said you're
gonna be rich.
1284
01:30:54,500 --> 01:30:55,800
Yeah, I heard you.
1285
01:31:12,833 --> 01:31:14,267
(SOMEPLACE ELSE PLAYING)
1286
01:31:14,267 --> 01:31:18,333
* You got into my life
1287
01:31:18,333 --> 01:31:22,233
* I don't know how
you found me
1288
01:31:22,233 --> 01:31:24,067
* But you did
1289
01:31:24,067 --> 01:31:27,533
* It stopped me
heading someplace else
1290
01:31:29,500 --> 01:31:33,433
* Took me a while to say
1291
01:31:33,433 --> 01:31:35,633
I'm getting off. There are
three trunks in there.
1292
01:31:35,633 --> 01:31:37,700
Get some help
and bring them up.
1293
01:31:37,700 --> 01:31:42,167
* But now I'm saddened
like I've never been
1294
01:31:42,167 --> 01:31:44,433
* Regretting that we'll leave
1295
01:31:47,067 --> 01:31:51,367
* So for a while
could you comfort me
1296
01:31:51,367 --> 01:31:55,200
* And hold me for some time
1297
01:31:56,600 --> 01:31:57,500
* I need you now
to be beside me
1298
01:31:57,500 --> 01:31:58,500
Tatlock!
1299
01:32:00,867 --> 01:32:03,167
Tatlock! Tatlock!
1300
01:32:05,867 --> 01:32:06,833
Tatlock!
1301
01:32:09,567 --> 01:32:11,333
* Empty faces
1302
01:32:11,333 --> 01:32:13,167
Move! Move, move!
1303
01:32:13,167 --> 01:32:15,567
* Wish I could leave them all
1304
01:32:15,567 --> 01:32:16,833
* In someplace else
1305
01:32:19,167 --> 01:32:21,133
What made you decide to stay?
1306
01:32:21,133 --> 01:32:22,933
I never got your first name.
1307
01:32:22,933 --> 01:32:24,100
It's Gloria.
1308
01:32:34,567 --> 01:32:36,233
Come here, Gloria Tatlock.
1309
01:32:43,500 --> 01:32:46,233
Stop the boat!
Somebody, stop the boat!
1310
01:32:46,233 --> 01:32:48,067
Will you stop this boat?
1311
01:32:48,067 --> 01:32:51,400
Hey, hey, I am sorry,
but this boat don't stop
until we reach Honolulu.
1312
01:32:54,100 --> 01:32:55,067
(YELLING)
1313
01:33:00,067 --> 01:33:01,300
What is he doing?
1314
01:33:04,267 --> 01:33:05,233
Glendon?
1315
01:33:09,800 --> 01:33:12,067
Maybe he's just upset
'cause I didn't say goodbye.
1316
01:33:12,067 --> 01:33:13,433
(FARADAY SHOUTING)
1317
01:33:16,233 --> 01:33:17,467
(THUDDING)
1318
01:33:17,467 --> 01:33:18,567
God damn it.
1319
01:33:35,967 --> 01:33:37,333
A wilted memory, huh?
1320
01:33:44,367 --> 01:33:45,967
Son-of-a-bitch.
1321
01:33:45,967 --> 01:33:46,900
Gloria,
1322
01:33:48,967 --> 01:33:52,233
if I were you I would wave
and blow him a big kiss.
1323
01:33:52,233 --> 01:33:54,167
I will not. He's an evil,
horrible man.
1324
01:33:57,233 --> 01:33:59,300
Wave anyway.
That evil, horrible man
1325
01:33:59,300 --> 01:34:01,600
just sent you
the best bouquet
a girl could ever want.
1326
01:34:01,600 --> 01:34:02,867
(LAUGHING)
1327
01:34:02,867 --> 01:34:03,967
(WHOOPING)
1328
01:34:05,267 --> 01:34:06,400
Wave, Gloria!
1329
01:34:07,700 --> 01:34:08,733
(LAUGHING)
1330
01:34:18,767 --> 01:34:20,200
(SHANGHAI SURPRISE
PLAYING)
1331
01:34:35,367 --> 01:34:38,733
* I don't understand
how I got delayed
1332
01:34:38,733 --> 01:34:41,733
* I should be sailing today
on a liner
1333
01:34:43,167 --> 01:34:47,067
* Was kicked in the ass
on a dock at Yangtze
1334
01:34:47,067 --> 01:34:50,733
* It's no way for a man
to see China
1335
01:34:50,733 --> 01:34:51,900
* But I'm ready
1336
01:34:54,733 --> 01:34:56,867
* You must be crazy
* Crazy
1337
01:34:58,867 --> 01:35:01,100
* And you got no money
* Money
1338
01:35:02,867 --> 01:35:04,300
* But you're a trier
1339
01:35:08,167 --> 01:35:12,200
* My straits are dire
from the wok into the fire
1340
01:35:12,200 --> 01:35:16,100
* I'd like to meet you
but I've broken my chopstick
1341
01:35:16,100 --> 01:35:18,367
* Sometimes there's
no hope in
1342
01:35:18,367 --> 01:35:19,733
* In chasing promises
1343
01:35:19,733 --> 01:35:21,500
* I'd wanna love you
1344
01:35:21,500 --> 01:35:24,300
* Though it could prove
to be unwise
1345
01:35:26,100 --> 01:35:28,600
* Shanghai surprise
1346
01:35:28,600 --> 01:35:32,667
* Whatever you're saying,
I want it anyway in
1347
01:35:32,667 --> 01:35:35,100
* Been hanging 'round
for a ride on your rickshaw
1348
01:35:35,100 --> 01:35:36,800
* Oh, babe
1349
01:35:36,800 --> 01:35:40,167
* You may correct me,
now that you've inspected me
1350
01:35:40,167 --> 01:35:42,067
* Come over here
1351
01:35:42,067 --> 01:35:45,933
* Let me feel you
cut down to size
1352
01:35:45,933 --> 01:35:48,833
* Oh, Shanghai surprise
1353
01:35:48,833 --> 01:35:52,867
* My straits are dire
from the wok into the fire
1354
01:35:52,867 --> 01:35:56,700
* I'd like to know you
but I'm not really social
1355
01:35:56,700 --> 01:36:00,367
* Sometimes it's no joke,
can't cope with opium
1356
01:36:00,367 --> 01:36:02,300
* I'd like to love you
1357
01:36:02,300 --> 01:36:05,333
* But I'm not sure
what's in your eyes
1358
01:36:06,667 --> 01:36:09,067
* Shanghai surprise
1359
01:36:31,067 --> 01:36:32,933
* Shanghai surprise
95192
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