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1
00:00:05,137 --> 00:00:06,632
Hi, Tony.
2
00:00:06,847 --> 00:00:09,635
- Guess what I just bought?
- A new bowling bag.
3
00:00:09,809 --> 00:00:12,478
Very funny. Are you going
bowling with us tonight?
4
00:00:12,645 --> 00:00:15,978
Oh, I can't, Roger. Jeannie expects
me to be with her every minute.
5
00:00:16,148 --> 00:00:18,307
She's got a long list of things
for me to do.
6
00:00:18,484 --> 00:00:21,568
She wants me to go to movies and
plays and museums and picnics-
7
00:00:21,737 --> 00:00:23,860
- That sounds like fun.
- It would be fun...
8
00:00:24,031 --> 00:00:26,818
...if I had time for it, but, well, I'm-
I'm scheduled...
9
00:00:26,993 --> 00:00:29,947
...to do the lunar-landing
research vehicle next month.
10
00:00:30,121 --> 00:00:31,401
Know what you should do?
11
00:00:31,581 --> 00:00:34,036
Get her a hobby.
That'd solve all your problems.
12
00:00:34,208 --> 00:00:37,293
Can you imagine Jeannie
with a hobby?
13
00:00:38,421 --> 00:00:41,256
Hey, wait a minute.
That's not a bad i- You're brilliant.
14
00:00:41,424 --> 00:00:43,962
Yeah, something that'll keep
her busy 24 hours a day.
15
00:00:44,135 --> 00:00:45,629
Well, I could-
16
00:00:46,137 --> 00:00:48,592
Good morning, master.
Good morning, Major Healey.
17
00:00:48,764 --> 00:00:50,472
Good morning, Jeannie.
18
00:00:50,641 --> 00:00:53,975
Tony just told me that he's gonna try
to get you to take up a hobby-
19
00:00:54,145 --> 00:00:56,054
- Roger.
- Oh, a hobby?
20
00:00:56,397 --> 00:00:58,271
Have you ever thought of studying...
21
00:00:58,691 --> 00:01:00,316
...designing or sculpture?
22
00:01:00,526 --> 00:01:03,313
Oh, no, I would not be interested.
23
00:01:04,322 --> 00:01:06,895
- Dancing?
- Karate?
24
00:01:07,074 --> 00:01:09,945
Roge. Isn't there anything
that interests you, Jeannie?
25
00:01:11,329 --> 00:01:14,532
Oh, yes, master.
I'm interested in all those things.
26
00:01:14,749 --> 00:01:19,161
But if I studied any of them, I wouldn't
be able to spend all my time with you.
27
00:01:19,337 --> 00:01:20,831
Nice try, nice try.
28
00:01:21,005 --> 00:01:24,006
- Are you ready to go to the art exhibit?
- No, I'm not going.
29
00:01:24,175 --> 00:01:26,167
I've told you three times, I can't go.
30
00:01:26,344 --> 00:01:27,589
Oh, but you must.
31
00:01:27,762 --> 00:01:31,925
No, I mustn't. Now, you've got to
realize that when I say no, I mean no.
32
00:01:32,099 --> 00:01:34,341
- Right. He has a will of iron.
- Yeah.
33
00:01:35,186 --> 00:01:38,140
Yeah, a will of iron.
34
00:01:41,192 --> 00:01:44,062
- Jeannie.
- Welcome to the art exhibit, master.
35
00:01:44,237 --> 00:01:45,814
Yeah.
36
00:02:48,801 --> 00:02:51,506
Oh, look, master.
37
00:02:51,679 --> 00:02:53,755
It is an original Aunt Sarah.
38
00:02:53,931 --> 00:02:56,173
- Yeah.
- Mom, I'm tired.
39
00:02:56,350 --> 00:02:57,726
I want to go.
40
00:02:57,894 --> 00:02:59,933
Shut up and stop whining.
41
00:03:00,104 --> 00:03:02,346
You're gonna have culture
if it kills you.
42
00:03:02,523 --> 00:03:05,560
I cannot stand to hear people
treat children like that.
43
00:03:05,776 --> 00:03:07,568
- Neither can I.
- My feet hurt.
44
00:03:07,737 --> 00:03:08,816
Can't we go home?
45
00:03:08,988 --> 00:03:11,064
Do you want to be
ignorant like your father?
46
00:03:12,950 --> 00:03:14,610
Jeannie, don't get into this.
47
00:03:14,827 --> 00:03:16,108
Jeannie.
48
00:03:21,167 --> 00:03:22,495
Mom?
49
00:03:24,962 --> 00:03:26,919
Jeannie, come on.
50
00:03:31,135 --> 00:03:33,507
Harold.
51
00:03:34,680 --> 00:03:37,717
Jeannie, why did you turn
that boy's mother into a goose?
52
00:03:37,892 --> 00:03:39,801
Because she was a goose, master.
53
00:03:39,977 --> 00:03:42,385
I could not stand to see
the way she treated him.
54
00:03:42,563 --> 00:03:44,888
There's a very special
way to treat children.
55
00:03:45,066 --> 00:03:46,311
Yeah, I'm sure there is.
56
00:03:46,484 --> 00:03:48,975
- But turning a mother-
- I know all about children.
57
00:03:49,153 --> 00:03:51,561
Someday I'm going
to write a book about it.
58
00:03:51,739 --> 00:03:53,067
Yeah, you do that.
59
00:03:53,241 --> 00:03:56,111
It would be the best book
in the whole world.
60
00:03:56,410 --> 00:03:59,080
You think you could write a book
about bringing up kids?
61
00:03:59,247 --> 00:04:01,369
Of course, master.
62
00:04:01,540 --> 00:04:03,450
How long do you think it'd take?
63
00:04:04,377 --> 00:04:07,461
I do not know. Maybe...
64
00:04:07,964 --> 00:04:09,244
...three or four weeks.
65
00:04:09,423 --> 00:04:12,757
Three or four weeks, huh? You
wouldn't be able to do anything else.
66
00:04:12,927 --> 00:04:14,920
What I mean is,
you'd have to concentrate.
67
00:04:15,096 --> 00:04:17,005
Oh, I would not mind, master.
68
00:04:17,348 --> 00:04:20,764
- Do you really think I should do it?
- Oh, yeah, I do, I really do.
69
00:04:21,519 --> 00:04:24,010
Very well, master. I shall.
70
00:04:28,734 --> 00:04:31,901
I am afraid you will not be seeing
much of me for a while, master.
71
00:04:32,071 --> 00:04:36,021
We all have to make sacrifices.
Now, take your time. Don't rush it.
72
00:04:36,367 --> 00:04:37,565
Oh, do not worry, master.
73
00:04:37,743 --> 00:04:39,701
It will be a good book.
You will like it.
74
00:04:39,870 --> 00:04:42,112
I already like it.
75
00:05:16,699 --> 00:05:17,814
Master.
76
00:05:17,992 --> 00:05:19,570
Oh, hi, Jeannie. How's the book?
77
00:05:19,744 --> 00:05:22,495
It is finished, master.
78
00:05:22,663 --> 00:05:24,786
How to be a Fantastic Parent.
79
00:05:26,417 --> 00:05:28,208
- You like the title?
- Yeah, it's fine.
80
00:05:28,377 --> 00:05:31,793
What about
How to be a Fantastic Mother?
81
00:05:32,506 --> 00:05:34,795
That is a splendid idea.
82
00:05:34,967 --> 00:05:36,509
You like it?
83
00:05:41,724 --> 00:05:43,847
I do not think I should
put my name on it.
84
00:05:44,018 --> 00:05:45,596
- Do you?
- No, I don't think so.
85
00:05:45,770 --> 00:05:47,846
How about-?
Why don't you try anonymous.
86
00:05:48,022 --> 00:05:50,015
Who is anonymous?
87
00:05:51,150 --> 00:05:52,810
You could use any name
you want to.
88
00:05:52,985 --> 00:05:54,942
I've got to get to the office. I'm late.
89
00:05:55,112 --> 00:05:58,778
- I'll see you later.
- Very well, and thank you, master.
90
00:05:58,950 --> 00:06:01,441
- For what?
- Your splendid title.
91
00:06:01,911 --> 00:06:03,322
Thank you too.
92
00:06:03,496 --> 00:06:04,990
For what, master?
93
00:06:05,164 --> 00:06:07,951
Three weeks' training
on the L.L.R.V.
94
00:06:09,669 --> 00:06:11,708
L.L.R.V.?
95
00:06:13,756 --> 00:06:18,085
Now, who shall publish my book?
96
00:06:24,976 --> 00:06:26,636
See.
97
00:06:29,605 --> 00:06:32,855
"Woodhouse Publishing Company,
New York City, New York. "
98
00:06:33,025 --> 00:06:35,563
I will let them publish my book.
99
00:06:43,953 --> 00:06:45,946
Anonymous?
100
00:06:50,334 --> 00:06:51,745
That is better.
101
00:06:51,919 --> 00:06:55,004
Major Anthony Nelson.
102
00:07:01,137 --> 00:07:03,806
Sam Marcus is one of the best
astronauts in the program.
103
00:07:04,098 --> 00:07:06,589
They really hauled him
on the carpet, huh?
104
00:07:07,143 --> 00:07:08,934
That poor devil.
105
00:07:10,897 --> 00:07:12,936
It is from the publisher.
106
00:07:13,107 --> 00:07:15,064
Let that be a lesson to all of us.
107
00:07:15,234 --> 00:07:18,021
I am sure sorry for him, Roger, but-
108
00:07:19,405 --> 00:07:23,699
Oh, they have accepted
my master's book.
109
00:07:23,868 --> 00:07:27,735
Yeah, yeah, well, all we can do
in the future is just be more careful.
110
00:07:27,914 --> 00:07:31,199
Yeah, I'll-
I'll see you down at the centre.
111
00:07:31,375 --> 00:07:34,080
- That's a shame.
- What is a shame, master?
112
00:07:34,253 --> 00:07:37,539
One of our best astronauts, Sam
Marcus, just got himself in trouble.
113
00:07:37,715 --> 00:07:39,873
- How?
- He wrote a magazine article...
114
00:07:40,051 --> 00:07:41,794
...didn't clear it.
115
00:07:41,969 --> 00:07:43,796
And that got him
into trouble, master?
116
00:07:43,971 --> 00:07:46,925
Oh, yeah, sure. Every time
an astronaut writes anything...
117
00:07:47,099 --> 00:07:49,057
...he's got to clear it through NASA.
118
00:07:49,227 --> 00:07:50,472
He does?
119
00:07:53,272 --> 00:07:56,190
Mail-? Jeannie,
did you get the mail?
120
00:07:56,776 --> 00:07:59,611
It's just advertising.
I better get down to the office.
121
00:07:59,779 --> 00:08:02,104
I want to see how poor old Sam
is gonna make out.
122
00:08:02,281 --> 00:08:04,737
- I'll see you tonight.
- Yes, master.
123
00:08:10,206 --> 00:08:12,993
Oh, well, who will know?
No one will read the book anyway.
124
00:08:29,016 --> 00:08:30,676
- It's all set to go, major.
- Thanks.
125
00:08:30,851 --> 00:08:32,844
Well, good luck, Tony.
Look, do a good job.
126
00:08:33,020 --> 00:08:36,354
When we use this flying mattress
to scoot along the moon's surface...
127
00:08:36,524 --> 00:08:38,315
...we don't want anything
to go wrong.
128
00:08:38,484 --> 00:08:41,818
I said, when we-
Never mind, never mind. Good luck.
129
00:08:41,988 --> 00:08:44,395
- Good luck.
- Bye, sir.
130
00:08:56,919 --> 00:09:00,668
Hey, it worked, it worked,
look at him go.
131
00:09:13,936 --> 00:09:16,723
- Is that Major Nelson up there?
- Yes, sir.
132
00:09:30,411 --> 00:09:32,404
Perfect. Couldn't have
handled better.
133
00:09:32,580 --> 00:09:34,738
That's great, major.
134
00:09:34,916 --> 00:09:37,870
Major, there are some
reporters in my office to see you.
135
00:09:38,044 --> 00:09:39,372
Thank you. Sir?
136
00:09:39,545 --> 00:09:41,621
There are reporters
in my office to see you.
137
00:09:41,797 --> 00:09:43,457
They probably heard about the test.
138
00:09:43,633 --> 00:09:45,257
- Shall we go?
- Pardon me?
139
00:09:45,426 --> 00:09:48,510
- Shall we go?
- Oh, yes, yes. Here.
140
00:09:49,680 --> 00:09:52,515
Ladies and gentlemen,
this is Major Nelson.
141
00:09:52,683 --> 00:09:56,099
How do you do? I understand you-all
want to ask me some questions.
142
00:09:56,270 --> 00:10:00,897
Would you explain
your theory about breast-feeding?
143
00:10:01,317 --> 00:10:03,274
In chapter three in your book,
you said-
144
00:10:03,486 --> 00:10:05,977
How do you feel about
getting a national baby award...
145
00:10:06,155 --> 00:10:08,278
...from the Mother's Organization
of America?
146
00:10:08,449 --> 00:10:10,572
I'm sorry.
I don't seem to understand...
147
00:10:10,743 --> 00:10:15,239
- ... what you-all are talking about.
- They're talking about your book:
148
00:10:15,414 --> 00:10:18,036
How to be a Fantastic Mother.
149
00:10:18,209 --> 00:10:19,407
My book?
150
00:10:19,585 --> 00:10:20,830
Well, I never wrote a-
151
00:10:22,421 --> 00:10:23,666
Wrote a better book.
152
00:10:23,839 --> 00:10:25,631
How's it feel
to be the new Dr. Spock?
153
00:10:25,800 --> 00:10:28,920
- More about your theory on teething.
- I read that-
154
00:10:29,512 --> 00:10:32,881
It's amazing how
for one hour and a half...
155
00:10:33,057 --> 00:10:36,473
...you managed to say
absolutely nothing.
156
00:10:36,644 --> 00:10:39,217
You're a bachelor,
aren't you, major?
157
00:10:39,397 --> 00:10:41,354
- Yes, yes.
- I'm a psychiatrist.
158
00:10:41,566 --> 00:10:42,976
I'm staking my reputation...
159
00:10:43,150 --> 00:10:46,270
...that this book was not written
by a bachelor.
160
00:10:46,445 --> 00:10:48,652
Doctor, believe me,
it came off my typewriter.
161
00:10:48,823 --> 00:10:51,148
I'm going to give you
a chance to prove it.
162
00:10:51,325 --> 00:10:53,899
Prove it? Prove it how, sir?
163
00:10:54,620 --> 00:10:57,954
Do you remember what
you said in chapter 13?
164
00:10:58,124 --> 00:11:01,409
Chapter-? Chapter 13?
Well, no, not- Not word for word.
165
00:11:01,586 --> 00:11:04,337
You said that in one evening...
166
00:11:04,505 --> 00:11:07,672
...you could take the most
incorrigible child in the world...
167
00:11:07,842 --> 00:11:10,380
...and change him into
a loving human being.
168
00:11:10,553 --> 00:11:13,091
Did-? Did I say that?
I mean, that was in chapter 13?
169
00:11:13,264 --> 00:11:17,309
Yes, major. And I happen to have
the most incorrigible child in the world.
170
00:11:17,476 --> 00:11:20,430
That is, he belongs to my sister.
He's 12 years old.
171
00:11:20,605 --> 00:11:25,432
He's already gone through three
analysts, of which I was one.
172
00:11:25,610 --> 00:11:27,686
Well, it sounds
like quite a challenge, sir.
173
00:11:27,862 --> 00:11:30,068
However, I'm afraid I'm not
gonna have time-
174
00:11:30,239 --> 00:11:32,196
- One evening.
- Yes, sir?
175
00:11:32,366 --> 00:11:34,904
You said you could do it
in one evening.
176
00:11:35,077 --> 00:11:36,869
He'll be
at your house tonight, major.
177
00:11:37,413 --> 00:11:41,114
Tonight? Tonight's impossible,
sir. I have to work on the L.L.R.V.
178
00:11:41,292 --> 00:11:44,127
And we're going to have
another press conference...
179
00:11:44,462 --> 00:11:47,416
...where I'll tell the reporters
how successful you've been...
180
00:11:47,590 --> 00:11:51,041
...or you can explain that this book
is a fraud and you didn't write it.
181
00:11:51,219 --> 00:11:53,295
I needn't remind you
how NASA feels...
182
00:11:53,471 --> 00:11:58,512
...about astronauts getting phoney
publicity, need I, major?
183
00:11:58,684 --> 00:12:01,010
- No, no.
- You're excused.
184
00:12:01,562 --> 00:12:03,222
Thank you.
185
00:12:03,940 --> 00:12:06,727
Remember Sam Marcus?
186
00:12:10,279 --> 00:12:12,853
Oh, Mother Nelson,
I just read your book...
187
00:12:13,032 --> 00:12:15,986
...and I- It's nice reading.
188
00:12:16,160 --> 00:12:17,571
Jeannie.
189
00:12:21,290 --> 00:12:24,659
Jeannie. Jeannie,
I'd like to talk to you.
190
00:12:25,503 --> 00:12:28,124
- Good evening, master.
- Hello.
191
00:12:28,297 --> 00:12:30,967
Say, how'd my name get
on that book?
192
00:12:31,133 --> 00:12:33,173
The publisher made a mistake.
193
00:12:33,344 --> 00:12:36,013
No, you did, and you know
what it's gonna cost me?
194
00:12:36,222 --> 00:12:38,511
- My job.
- Oh, but why, master?
195
00:12:38,683 --> 00:12:41,719
- You're an expert on children.
- I'm not an expert on children...
196
00:12:41,894 --> 00:12:43,388
...and Dr. Bellows knows that.
197
00:12:43,563 --> 00:12:45,436
Oh, he cannot prove it.
198
00:12:45,606 --> 00:12:48,607
Oh, yes, he can. He's bringing
his nephew over here tonight.
199
00:12:48,776 --> 00:12:52,227
I'm led to believe his nephew is
the youngest delinquent on record.
200
00:12:52,405 --> 00:12:56,105
If I don't make that kid into a bundle
of love before the evening is out...
201
00:12:56,284 --> 00:12:58,857
- ... I'm finished, over.
- That is easy, master.
202
00:12:59,036 --> 00:13:01,325
- I'll show you the chapter-
- You'll do nothing.
203
00:13:01,497 --> 00:13:03,490
- But, master.
- You leave that kid alone.
204
00:13:03,833 --> 00:13:06,039
- If that is what you wish.
- That's what I wish.
205
00:13:07,378 --> 00:13:10,047
How do you get yourself
into these things?
206
00:13:17,388 --> 00:13:19,381
- Hello, Dr. Bellows.
- Good evening, major.
207
00:13:19,557 --> 00:13:21,882
This is my nephew, Richard.
208
00:13:22,059 --> 00:13:25,179
Hello, Richard.
You look like a fine young man.
209
00:13:25,354 --> 00:13:27,228
You an astronaut?
210
00:13:27,398 --> 00:13:30,185
Yes, yes. You want to be
an astronaut when you grow up?
211
00:13:30,359 --> 00:13:32,186
You think I'm some kind of a creep?
212
00:13:32,361 --> 00:13:35,528
Tell him what you're going
to do when you grow up, Richard.
213
00:13:35,698 --> 00:13:38,106
I'm gonna join the Mafia.
214
00:13:41,162 --> 00:13:42,704
Has anybody
given him a spanking?
215
00:13:42,872 --> 00:13:46,371
Lots of times, but nobody
ever spanks me more than once.
216
00:13:46,542 --> 00:13:48,749
- Oh, is that right?
- Oh, yes.
217
00:13:48,920 --> 00:13:50,829
Tell him why, Richard.
218
00:13:51,172 --> 00:13:54,422
Because every time somebody
spanks me, I set fire to something.
219
00:13:54,634 --> 00:13:57,670
- You want to try it?
- No, no.
220
00:13:57,845 --> 00:14:00,632
Well, I'll just run along
and leave you two to each other.
221
00:14:00,806 --> 00:14:03,297
- No, you're not gonna leave-
- You have three hours.
222
00:14:03,476 --> 00:14:05,967
You're not leaving him here, doctor.
223
00:14:09,440 --> 00:14:10,768
Say...
224
00:14:11,943 --> 00:14:14,979
Richard, I spent a lot of time
on that.
225
00:14:15,154 --> 00:14:18,488
Hey, you know, I think we can
work out our problems by talking...
226
00:14:18,658 --> 00:14:20,567
...and getting to
understand each other.
227
00:14:20,743 --> 00:14:23,412
- You seem bright.
- My uncle, the head shrinker, says...
228
00:14:23,579 --> 00:14:27,447
...if you don't straighten me out
tonight, you're in a bunch of trouble.
229
00:14:27,625 --> 00:14:29,582
- He said that, huh?
- Yeah.
230
00:14:29,752 --> 00:14:31,626
- And you know something?
- What?
231
00:14:31,796 --> 00:14:33,753
You're in a bunch of trouble.
232
00:14:35,716 --> 00:14:37,259
Got anything to eat around here?
233
00:14:37,426 --> 00:14:39,549
Sure. We got cookies
and milk in the kitchen.
234
00:14:39,720 --> 00:14:41,001
Hold this.
235
00:14:48,896 --> 00:14:50,688
- Oh, General Peterson.
- Howdy.
236
00:14:50,856 --> 00:14:52,434
Forgive me for barging in on you.
237
00:14:52,608 --> 00:14:55,942
- That's okay. What can I do for you?
- It's about that book you wrote.
238
00:14:56,112 --> 00:14:58,603
- Book?
- Congratulations.
239
00:14:58,781 --> 00:15:02,150
I had no idea that you knew
so much...
240
00:15:03,661 --> 00:15:04,941
...about raising children.
241
00:15:06,455 --> 00:15:08,531
I don't really know
that much about it, sir.
242
00:15:08,708 --> 00:15:10,499
It's an instinctive thing, I suppose.
243
00:15:10,668 --> 00:15:13,373
Don't be modest.
When a book gets to be a bestseller...
244
00:15:13,546 --> 00:15:15,788
...there's gotta be
a good reason for it.
245
00:15:15,965 --> 00:15:17,424
Well, I suppose there is, sir.
246
00:15:17,592 --> 00:15:19,668
Thanks for dropping by
to congratulate me.
247
00:15:19,844 --> 00:15:22,050
Well, I didn't come by
just for that, Tony, I-
248
00:15:22,263 --> 00:15:24,836
Well, I have a little granddaughter,
11 years old.
249
00:15:25,016 --> 00:15:27,423
She's a nice girl,
but she's terribly shy.
250
00:15:27,643 --> 00:15:31,226
And because of that, she's withdrawn
in a kind of a protective shell.
251
00:15:31,397 --> 00:15:33,022
It's- It's ruining her life.
252
00:15:33,190 --> 00:15:35,148
We can't even get
her to talk anymore.
253
00:15:35,318 --> 00:15:37,773
If you'd help us,
I certainly would appreciate it.
254
00:15:37,987 --> 00:15:41,023
Well, I'd like to try, sir,
but I'm really not qualified for it.
255
00:15:41,198 --> 00:15:43,440
Bellows doesn't believe
you wrote this book.
256
00:15:43,659 --> 00:15:46,150
This time we're really going
to teach him a lesson.
257
00:15:46,662 --> 00:15:49,070
- Yeah.
- Gina. Gina.
258
00:15:50,416 --> 00:15:52,824
This is my little
granddaughter, Gina.
259
00:15:53,002 --> 00:15:55,919
- This is Major Nelson.
- How do you do, Gina?
260
00:15:56,797 --> 00:16:01,673
Gina's gonna have a birthday party
next week, aren't you, Gina?
261
00:16:01,844 --> 00:16:05,889
Now- Now, you stay here.
You stay here with Major Nelson.
262
00:16:06,140 --> 00:16:08,014
Wait till Dr. Bellows
hears about this.
263
00:16:08,226 --> 00:16:10,551
- I'll see you in three hours, Tony.
- Sir-
264
00:16:10,728 --> 00:16:12,934
- And good luck, good luck.
- Thank you, but I-
265
00:16:13,105 --> 00:16:14,849
Keep it.
266
00:16:20,988 --> 00:16:24,073
Gina, Gina, why don't you
go upstairs and play, huh?
267
00:16:24,242 --> 00:16:27,575
I'll- I'll be up in just-
Just one minute.
268
00:16:34,085 --> 00:16:36,540
- What are you doing?
- Making a mess.
269
00:16:36,712 --> 00:16:40,413
- Are you going to spank me?
- Give me those things.
270
00:16:40,591 --> 00:16:41,872
Listen, you shouldn't be-
271
00:16:42,051 --> 00:16:45,467
How would you like to play
with a pretty little girl, huh?
272
00:16:45,638 --> 00:16:46,918
Where is she?
273
00:16:47,098 --> 00:16:49,671
No, I guess that's not
such a good idea after all.
274
00:16:53,896 --> 00:16:57,396
I want you to clean this pla-
Would you stop that.
275
00:16:57,650 --> 00:17:01,315
I want you to clean up, understand?
I'll be back in about two minutes.
276
00:17:03,114 --> 00:17:04,572
- Master.
- What is it?
277
00:17:04,740 --> 00:17:06,235
Is he not a darling boy?
278
00:17:06,409 --> 00:17:08,816
A darling boy?
That kid wants to join the Mafia.
279
00:17:08,995 --> 00:17:11,782
You know what?
I don't think they'll take him.
280
00:17:11,998 --> 00:17:14,489
He's not that bad.
Do you know what I'd do with him?
281
00:17:14,667 --> 00:17:17,075
No, I know what I'd do.
It's against the law.
282
00:17:17,253 --> 00:17:20,088
I've got a kid that won't talk,
and a kid in the kitchen...
283
00:17:20,256 --> 00:17:23,541
...that I can't turn my back on.
I gotta keep them apart.
284
00:17:27,054 --> 00:17:28,299
Hi there.
285
00:17:28,472 --> 00:17:30,015
I brought you something.
286
00:17:30,308 --> 00:17:32,799
How would you like some
cookies and milk, huh?
287
00:17:33,519 --> 00:17:36,010
Say, you're not afraid of me,
are you, Gina?
288
00:17:36,731 --> 00:17:38,889
Yeah, come on,
you're too pretty to be shy.
289
00:17:39,066 --> 00:17:41,854
Anybody ever tell you
that you're a beautiful young girl?
290
00:17:48,075 --> 00:17:50,282
Do you have any
brothers or sisters?
291
00:17:52,163 --> 00:17:55,828
Hey, I bet you had- You don't have
anybody to talk to, do you?
292
00:17:58,127 --> 00:17:59,325
Gina...
293
00:18:00,630 --> 00:18:02,918
...how would you
like to play with a rocket?
294
00:18:03,674 --> 00:18:05,133
Or...
295
00:18:05,509 --> 00:18:07,668
...a globe?
296
00:18:07,845 --> 00:18:11,261
I bet you've never seen
one like this. It's a real antique.
297
00:18:15,561 --> 00:18:18,183
How about this telescope?
298
00:18:18,356 --> 00:18:22,140
I can show you, through this telescope,
the Sea of Tranquility.
299
00:18:22,318 --> 00:18:25,319
It's on the moon. I'm gonna be
landing there one of these days.
300
00:18:28,783 --> 00:18:30,241
Gina...
301
00:18:30,826 --> 00:18:32,784
...I'm just trying to help.
302
00:18:36,707 --> 00:18:38,166
Look.
303
00:18:38,543 --> 00:18:40,167
See, look here.
304
00:18:40,628 --> 00:18:42,252
It's a doll.
305
00:18:42,505 --> 00:18:45,625
Her name is- Is Jeannie.
306
00:18:49,345 --> 00:18:51,753
You- You wait right here.
I'll be back.
307
00:18:55,643 --> 00:18:57,968
What's going on down here, huh?
308
00:19:04,235 --> 00:19:06,607
It took me three weeks to make that.
309
00:19:11,325 --> 00:19:13,899
Back to the old drawing board.
310
00:19:14,245 --> 00:19:15,787
Richard.
311
00:19:16,330 --> 00:19:17,789
Come here.
312
00:19:21,043 --> 00:19:23,250
Richard, you shouldn't
touch something...
313
00:19:23,421 --> 00:19:25,876
...that belongs to somebody else.
314
00:19:26,048 --> 00:19:28,456
Now, I'll tell you what...
315
00:19:28,759 --> 00:19:31,713
...I've got the makings
for a new plane out on the patio.
316
00:19:31,888 --> 00:19:34,010
Now, why don't you go
out there and build it.
317
00:19:34,181 --> 00:19:35,925
That's kid stuff.
318
00:19:36,100 --> 00:19:37,345
Oh, no, it isn't.
319
00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:39,766
It takes a bit of intelligence
to build one.
320
00:19:39,937 --> 00:19:41,764
My IQ is 170.
321
00:19:41,939 --> 00:19:43,731
What's yours?
322
00:19:45,234 --> 00:19:46,859
Forget it.
323
00:19:49,780 --> 00:19:51,773
Well, how are we
getting along, Gina?
324
00:19:51,949 --> 00:19:53,657
Feeling any better?
325
00:19:55,036 --> 00:19:57,361
What do we talk about?
326
00:19:58,623 --> 00:20:01,789
Darling, I don't know how to
explain. We don't have a lot of time.
327
00:20:01,959 --> 00:20:05,660
I've gotta get you talking before your
grandfather comes to pick you up.
328
00:20:10,968 --> 00:20:14,171
You're a very sweet young girl,
and I'm sure you have a lot to say.
329
00:20:14,347 --> 00:20:16,838
All you need is
a little sympathetic understanding...
330
00:20:17,016 --> 00:20:20,302
...and believe me,
I'm a sympathetic guy.
331
00:20:20,478 --> 00:20:25,472
Just- Just talk to me. Just say the
first thing that comes into your mind.
332
00:20:28,653 --> 00:20:31,357
I smell smoke.
333
00:20:32,156 --> 00:20:34,861
You see,
you see how easy that was?
334
00:20:35,034 --> 00:20:37,192
Three little words, I smell smoke.
335
00:20:37,370 --> 00:20:38,828
Wonderful.
336
00:20:44,168 --> 00:20:47,122
- Master.
- No, later.
337
00:20:51,801 --> 00:20:55,170
You think I'm gonna fall
for an old gag like that, huh?
338
00:20:58,641 --> 00:21:00,183
What do you think you're doing?
339
00:21:00,351 --> 00:21:01,976
I was making some rocket fuel.
340
00:21:02,144 --> 00:21:04,470
Yeah, well, stay away
from the stove...
341
00:21:04,647 --> 00:21:08,348
...and clean this mess up,
and fix that plane.
342
00:21:14,907 --> 00:21:16,070
Master.
343
00:21:16,242 --> 00:21:18,365
If you would read chapter 17,
it says here-
344
00:21:18,536 --> 00:21:20,160
Read? I don't have time to read.
345
00:21:20,329 --> 00:21:22,121
My whole life is going
down the drain.
346
00:21:22,290 --> 00:21:24,081
- But-
- What? No.
347
00:21:30,715 --> 00:21:35,542
Well, have you thought
of any games for us to play, huh?
348
00:21:36,888 --> 00:21:38,964
What's the matter, Gina?
349
00:21:39,140 --> 00:21:41,465
I want to go home.
350
00:21:44,854 --> 00:21:49,563
That's Dr. Bellows.
I- You just- You just stay right here.
351
00:21:49,734 --> 00:21:51,857
I'm sorry, honey.
352
00:21:57,158 --> 00:21:59,400
- I'm back.
- Has it been three hours already?
353
00:21:59,577 --> 00:22:01,902
- Yes, it has.
- It's amazing how time will pass...
354
00:22:02,079 --> 00:22:04,119
- ... when you're having fun.
- Having fun?
355
00:22:04,290 --> 00:22:06,579
A ball, a ball-
Richard's a wonderful kid.
356
00:22:06,751 --> 00:22:08,328
- Really wonderful kid.
- Richard?
357
00:22:08,502 --> 00:22:11,706
Sure, oh, yes, yes.
All he needs is a little understanding.
358
00:22:11,881 --> 00:22:13,790
It's amazing how
much fun you can have...
359
00:22:13,966 --> 00:22:17,169
...when you understand each other.
We're having such a good time...
360
00:22:17,345 --> 00:22:20,132
...I was wondering if he can spend
the night. I'd bring-
361
00:22:20,306 --> 00:22:22,927
- Major Nelson. Major Nelson.
- Yes, sir.
362
00:22:23,100 --> 00:22:24,180
- Where is he?
- Who?
363
00:22:24,352 --> 00:22:27,518
Oh, Richard. I'm sorry. Yes, he's-
Well, he's out on the patio...
364
00:22:27,688 --> 00:22:29,811
...assembling some model airplanes.
365
00:22:29,982 --> 00:22:31,227
He didn't smash them?
366
00:22:31,400 --> 00:22:33,773
There were a couple of accidents,
not important.
367
00:22:33,945 --> 00:22:35,854
Yes, may I see him now?
368
00:22:36,030 --> 00:22:39,529
- Well, I'd rather you didn't.
- Now, major.
369
00:22:42,870 --> 00:22:44,412
Gentlemen.
370
00:22:44,997 --> 00:22:47,037
- Good evening, general.
- General.
371
00:22:47,208 --> 00:22:49,117
- How are you, sir?
- Evening. How's Gina?
372
00:22:49,293 --> 00:22:52,247
Gina? Oh, wonderful, wonderful kid.
Just a charming girl.
373
00:22:52,421 --> 00:22:54,295
Aren't you proud of him, doctor?
374
00:22:54,465 --> 00:22:59,376
I will be as soon as I see my nephew
changed into a well-behaved little boy.
375
00:22:59,554 --> 00:23:01,961
- Richard.
- Doctor, general.
376
00:23:02,139 --> 00:23:05,306
You don't have to say a word, major.
377
00:23:05,476 --> 00:23:08,477
The evidence will speak for itself.
378
00:23:08,646 --> 00:23:11,563
- intelligent to make a model
as beautiful as that.
379
00:23:11,732 --> 00:23:14,270
I didn't make it. I just fixed it.
380
00:23:14,443 --> 00:23:16,483
Most girls would think
that's kid stuff.
381
00:23:17,154 --> 00:23:19,313
Oh, no, I think it's wonderful.
382
00:23:19,490 --> 00:23:21,946
You do? Really?
383
00:23:22,118 --> 00:23:23,826
- I'm making...
- I don't believe it.
384
00:23:23,995 --> 00:23:26,071
- Gina's talking.
- Come over and see it.
385
00:23:26,289 --> 00:23:28,827
I certainly owe you an apology,
Major Nelson.
386
00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:30,743
How in the world did you ever do it?
387
00:23:31,502 --> 00:23:33,411
Chapter 13.
388
00:23:37,049 --> 00:23:39,172
May I see you to your car?
389
00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:44,139
Amazing.
390
00:23:44,307 --> 00:23:46,714
- How did you say you did that?
- Read the book, sir.
391
00:23:46,893 --> 00:23:49,597
Well, I did, I did.
392
00:23:50,021 --> 00:23:53,306
It all seemed so terribly
simple in school.
393
00:23:53,482 --> 00:23:56,187
- Good night, major. Thanks-
- Oh, good night.
394
00:24:00,698 --> 00:24:03,367
I- I hope you're happy, master.
395
00:24:03,534 --> 00:24:05,776
Oh, thank you, Jeannie,
thank you very much.
396
00:24:05,953 --> 00:24:07,364
There's only one problem.
397
00:24:07,538 --> 00:24:10,029
- What is that, master?
- If you used magic on them-
398
00:24:10,207 --> 00:24:13,707
Oh, but I did not. I did not.
All I did was bring them together.
399
00:24:13,878 --> 00:24:15,372
And then what happened?
400
00:24:15,671 --> 00:24:18,209
You must read
the last chapter, master.
401
00:24:18,382 --> 00:24:21,716
It is about boys and girls.
31572
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