Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.SubtitleDB.org today
2
00:00:50,217 --> 00:00:52,344
Well, I wake up in the mornin'
3
00:00:52,419 --> 00:00:55,183
Each and every day
4
00:00:55,255 --> 00:01:00,022
And I sit down at the table
and I hear my daddy say
5
00:01:00,093 --> 00:01:02,561
Life is nothin'
It's a nothin'
6
00:01:02,629 --> 00:01:05,120
Life is nothin'
but a slap in the face
7
00:01:05,198 --> 00:01:07,564
Life is nothin'
It's a nothin'
8
00:01:07,634 --> 00:01:10,296
Life is nothin'
but a fat rat race
9
00:01:10,370 --> 00:01:14,807
Oh, yeah, yeah, oh, yeah, yeah
10
00:01:14,875 --> 00:01:17,366
Oh, yeah, yeah
11
00:01:17,444 --> 00:01:20,379
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah
12
00:01:20,447 --> 00:01:22,472
Every night I have a dream
13
00:01:22,549 --> 00:01:25,382
That you're takin' off your dress
14
00:01:25,452 --> 00:01:30,116
The only thing you're wearin'
is a button on your chest
15
00:01:30,190 --> 00:01:32,590
And the button
it says nothin'
16
00:01:32,659 --> 00:01:35,253
Life is nothin'
but a slap in the face
17
00:01:35,329 --> 00:01:37,627
Life is nothin'
It's a nothin'
18
00:01:37,698 --> 00:01:40,166
Life is nothin'
but a fat rat race
19
00:01:40,233 --> 00:01:44,966
What is life
20
00:01:45,038 --> 00:01:47,598
What is life
21
00:01:47,674 --> 00:01:50,108
A rat race, a rat race
22
00:01:50,177 --> 00:01:54,944
What is life
23
00:01:55,015 --> 00:01:57,677
What is life
24
00:01:57,751 --> 00:02:00,276
A rat race, a rat race
25
00:02:00,354 --> 00:02:03,016
A rat race, a rat-rat race
26
00:02:03,090 --> 00:02:07,356
Oh, yeah, yeah, oh, yeah, yeah
27
00:02:07,427 --> 00:02:10,453
Oh, yeah, yeah
28
00:02:10,530 --> 00:02:13,658
It's a jungle out there
and I know I don't belong
29
00:02:15,435 --> 00:02:18,802
So all night long
I just sing my stupid song
30
00:02:20,674 --> 00:02:22,869
Get a body out
in the rat, in the race
31
00:02:22,943 --> 00:02:25,411
Get a body out
in the rat, in the race
32
00:02:25,479 --> 00:02:28,039
Get a body out in the rat
33
00:02:32,219 --> 00:02:35,655
To the sound of the storm comin'
strictly from the B-A-H-A M-E-N
34
00:02:48,068 --> 00:02:50,536
Life ain't nothin'
but a big rat race
35
00:02:53,039 --> 00:02:55,234
Life ain't nothin'
but a big rat race
36
00:02:55,308 --> 00:02:57,538
Life is nothin'
It's a nothin'
37
00:02:57,611 --> 00:03:00,171
Life is nothin'
but a slap in the face
38
00:03:00,247 --> 00:03:02,579
Life is nothin'
It's a nothin'
39
00:03:02,649 --> 00:03:05,117
Life is nothin'
but a fat rat race
40
00:03:16,263 --> 00:03:20,300
Hi. I'm checking out. 14322.
41
00:03:22,068 --> 00:03:24,195
- Mr. Schaffer?
- That's me.
42
00:03:25,471 --> 00:03:28,463
- I have your bill right here.
- Great. Thank you.
43
00:03:28,541 --> 00:03:33,069
- How was your luck last night?
- I don't... I didn't gamble.
44
00:03:33,146 --> 00:03:37,082
I was here for a friend's bachelor
party. I guess he's the gambler.
45
00:03:39,619 --> 00:03:43,214
What's this $ 110?
46
00:03:43,289 --> 00:03:47,692
- Those are your in-room movies.
- I didn't watch any movies.
47
00:03:47,760 --> 00:03:51,662
Okay, let's see. Afro Whores.
48
00:03:51,731 --> 00:03:53,892
Afro Whores?
49
00:03:53,966 --> 00:03:57,265
You watched it...
let's see... 11 times.
50
00:03:59,439 --> 00:04:04,206
Afro Whores, 2:30. Afro Whores,
4:00. Afro Whores, 5:30.
51
00:04:04,277 --> 00:04:07,713
It says in the morning you watched
The Grinch for ten minutes...
52
00:04:07,780 --> 00:04:09,771
and then switched back
over to Afro Whores.
53
00:04:09,849 --> 00:04:12,818
I swear I didn't watch it.
I was at a bachelor party.
54
00:04:12,885 --> 00:04:15,115
There were 35 people there.
You can ask any of them.
55
00:04:15,188 --> 00:04:18,021
- Take that off my record.
- This is not a record, sir.
56
00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:22,551
- It's a delete.
- How many times did you watch it?
57
00:04:22,628 --> 00:04:25,563
None! I didn't watch it.
58
00:04:25,631 --> 00:04:29,624
Are you sure? "Sizzling,
three-way, backdoor action...
59
00:04:29,702 --> 00:04:32,068
featuring
two sexy soul sisters..."
60
00:04:32,138 --> 00:04:34,936
I don't need to know what
it's about. I did not watch it.
61
00:04:36,509 --> 00:04:39,740
I didn't.
62
00:04:39,812 --> 00:04:44,374
Drove 500, and Chipper Jones
struck out in that key situation.
63
00:04:44,450 --> 00:04:48,386
He's 0 for 5,
lost three straight games.
64
00:04:48,454 --> 00:04:52,584
This month he has
a one-game winning streak.
65
00:04:55,328 --> 00:05:00,288
Miss? Miss, can I have
another one of these, please?
66
00:05:00,366 --> 00:05:04,302
Oh, sorry.
I thought you were a woman.
67
00:05:04,370 --> 00:05:06,600
I am a woman.
68
00:05:08,474 --> 00:05:10,806
You know, you look
kind of familiar.
69
00:05:10,877 --> 00:05:13,402
Yeah, you do.
70
00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:16,505
You know, I get that
all the time.
71
00:05:16,582 --> 00:05:18,982
I guess I just have
one of those faces.
72
00:05:19,051 --> 00:05:22,680
And now for our loser of the week.
This week it's a no-brainer.
73
00:05:22,755 --> 00:05:25,246
Referee Owen Templeton made
the biggest bonehead call...
74
00:05:25,324 --> 00:05:27,258
in the history of football.
75
00:05:27,326 --> 00:05:31,695
It happened last Sunday at Dallas
with the score tied at 10.
76
00:05:31,764 --> 00:05:33,994
They were headed towards overtime.
Everything was cool.
77
00:05:34,066 --> 00:05:36,159
They were about to toss the coin
to see who would kick off.
78
00:05:36,235 --> 00:05:39,796
- Dallas, call it in the air.
- Tails.
79
00:05:39,872 --> 00:05:42,466
- That's heads.
- That was tails.
80
00:05:42,542 --> 00:05:44,669
- No. It's...
- That was tails.
81
00:05:44,744 --> 00:05:48,077
No... Wait! Hang on!
It's... Now, what did I say?
82
00:05:48,147 --> 00:05:50,115
- Tails!
- It's tails.
83
00:05:50,183 --> 00:05:53,175
- It's heads.
- What are you doin'?
84
00:05:55,221 --> 00:05:58,019
You saw...
85
00:05:58,090 --> 00:06:00,854
Okay, little brother,
just be cool.
86
00:06:00,927 --> 00:06:02,861
Just be cool.
87
00:06:16,476 --> 00:06:19,843
Okay, this is it.
See that glass?
88
00:06:19,912 --> 00:06:23,507
Walk across the lobby, slip on
the glass, let gravity do the rest.
89
00:06:24,484 --> 00:06:26,418
I might "eak" my neck.
90
00:06:26,486 --> 00:06:30,547
True. You could break your neck.
It's a risk I'm willing to take.
91
00:06:30,623 --> 00:06:33,558
Why don't "oo" do it?
92
00:06:33,626 --> 00:06:36,652
Because, Einstein, one of us
needs to be the victim...
93
00:06:36,729 --> 00:06:39,562
and one of us needs
to be the witness.
94
00:06:39,632 --> 00:06:42,999
I'm your own brother.
I don't know what you're sayin'.
95
00:06:43,069 --> 00:06:45,196
How's your tongue?
Let me see it.
96
00:06:48,674 --> 00:06:50,005
How's it look?
97
00:06:51,711 --> 00:06:55,875
It looks good.
It looks much better.
98
00:06:56,849 --> 00:06:58,282
Okay, here we go.
99
00:06:58,351 --> 00:07:02,720
We're on Candid Camera,
so make it look good.
100
00:07:13,966 --> 00:07:16,434
Excuse me. I'm a lawyer.
Gloria Allred.
101
00:07:16,502 --> 00:07:19,232
- What the hell happened here?
- She slipped on that glass.
102
00:07:19,305 --> 00:07:23,639
Those arrogant jerks. They're gonna
pay for this through the nose.
103
00:07:23,709 --> 00:07:26,405
How's your neck?
I've never seen such negligence.
104
00:07:26,479 --> 00:07:28,413
This is going to be huge.
105
00:07:28,514 --> 00:07:30,414
She's an angel.
106
00:07:30,483 --> 00:07:33,941
What a cute little face.
Would you look at those cheeks?
107
00:07:34,020 --> 00:07:36,784
- She's absolutely beautiful.
- She has your eyes.
108
00:07:36,856 --> 00:07:39,017
It's the only picture
I have of her.
109
00:07:39,091 --> 00:07:41,025
It's all worn out 'cause
I'm always looking at it.
110
00:07:41,093 --> 00:07:44,927
- You haven't seen her for 27 years?
- Not till today.
111
00:07:44,997 --> 00:07:48,057
- She just called you out of the blue?
- No, I found her.
112
00:07:48,134 --> 00:07:52,833
I hired a detective. I spent all
my money. Now we're going to meet.
113
00:07:52,905 --> 00:07:55,897
- You think she'll recognize me?
- Of course she will, won't she?
114
00:07:55,975 --> 00:07:57,909
- Yeah.
- She will.
115
00:08:18,898 --> 00:08:20,832
Vera Baker.
116
00:08:21,901 --> 00:08:23,835
My baby...
117
00:08:27,573 --> 00:08:30,770
Excuse me.
I have to take this.
118
00:08:31,844 --> 00:08:33,334
This is Merrill.
119
00:08:35,681 --> 00:08:37,774
No! That's unacceptable!
120
00:08:37,850 --> 00:08:41,650
If we don't ship by Tuesday, we won't
be in the stores by Mother's Day.
121
00:08:41,721 --> 00:08:44,656
That's unacceptable, so don't
give me any excuses, and do it!
122
00:08:44,724 --> 00:08:47,522
Do it!
Just shut up and get it done!
123
00:08:50,196 --> 00:08:53,632
Oh, honey,
you broke your phone.
124
00:08:53,699 --> 00:08:57,795
It's okay. I carry extras.
125
00:09:00,172 --> 00:09:03,403
- Why don't we sit down?
- Yes.
126
00:09:11,484 --> 00:09:14,817
You probably have
a thousand questions for me.
127
00:09:16,222 --> 00:09:19,851
I was young. I didn't tell
anybody I was pregnant.
128
00:09:19,925 --> 00:09:23,554
And I felt I could handle it
at the time.
129
00:09:23,629 --> 00:09:26,427
Hi. Do you think
you gals could...
130
00:09:26,499 --> 00:09:28,524
pull yourselves together
and bring us a drink?
131
00:09:28,601 --> 00:09:30,626
- Yeah.
- Sure.
132
00:09:30,703 --> 00:09:32,694
Sure. What would you like?
133
00:09:32,772 --> 00:09:35,036
Mimosa.
134
00:09:35,107 --> 00:09:39,043
They both want a mimosa.
135
00:09:39,111 --> 00:09:42,842
So, you sell cosmetics?
136
00:09:42,915 --> 00:09:46,578
Yeah. I have my own company.
137
00:09:46,652 --> 00:09:48,517
And we're going public.
138
00:09:49,588 --> 00:09:52,682
And you're not married?
139
00:09:52,758 --> 00:09:56,194
- Lucianne said you wouldn't.
- Who?
140
00:09:56,262 --> 00:09:59,493
She's my psychic. She's the one
who told me to come look for you.
141
00:09:59,565 --> 00:10:01,533
She said you needed me.
142
00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:05,263
- She did?
- She said you were lonely...
143
00:10:05,337 --> 00:10:09,933
and you were worried about money
and you had trouble sleeping.
144
00:10:12,845 --> 00:10:17,145
Who the hell isn't?
145
00:10:23,322 --> 00:10:25,290
See? I told you
we didn't need a bellman.
146
00:10:25,357 --> 00:10:29,054
Yeah, well, congratulations, Randy.
You avoided another tip.
147
00:10:29,128 --> 00:10:31,187
Those nickels and dimes
add up, my dear.
148
00:10:31,263 --> 00:10:33,322
- I call this bed!
- Hey, no fair.
149
00:10:33,399 --> 00:10:35,663
- You got to pick last night.
- Go to hell, Jason.
150
00:10:35,735 --> 00:10:37,669
- Make me.
- Hey, language, please.
151
00:10:37,737 --> 00:10:39,898
- Bev, his and her bathrobes.
- Yes.
152
00:10:39,972 --> 00:10:41,940
- Look at that view.
- Yeah.
153
00:10:42,007 --> 00:10:46,910
- Nice view.
- Okay, honey. Why don't you unpack?
154
00:10:46,979 --> 00:10:49,675
- Okay.
- I'm just gonna go look around.
155
00:10:49,749 --> 00:10:53,515
Wait, wait, wait.
You're not going to the casino?
156
00:10:53,586 --> 00:10:56,987
No, no, of course not.
157
00:10:57,056 --> 00:11:00,856
I just drove from the Grand Canyon.
Gotta stretch my legs.
158
00:11:00,926 --> 00:11:04,453
You swore to me on your mother's eyes
we are here to see David Copperfield.
159
00:11:04,530 --> 00:11:08,234
- No gambling.
- I'm just lookin' around.
160
00:11:09,301 --> 00:11:12,702
In fact, I'm gonna go
to the gift shop.
161
00:11:12,771 --> 00:11:14,830
I can jump farther than you.
162
00:11:14,907 --> 00:11:17,375
- I can jump farther.
- No way. Watch.
163
00:11:20,012 --> 00:11:23,641
That's gotta hurt.
Honey, kids need ya.
164
00:11:23,716 --> 00:11:26,048
- Hey, Nick. Nicky!
- Hey.
165
00:11:26,118 --> 00:11:28,416
- You're not leaving?
- I'm in court on Tuesday.
166
00:11:28,487 --> 00:11:31,923
- No, you're not.
- I work for people who are.
167
00:11:31,991 --> 00:11:34,789
You pussy. You can't leave.
It's still goin' on up there.
168
00:11:34,860 --> 00:11:37,226
Richie, I have to.
I've had two hours sleep.
169
00:11:37,296 --> 00:11:40,197
Steve Cunningham just got another
stripper. You got to see this one.
170
00:11:40,266 --> 00:11:42,200
- She's incredible.
- I got to get back.
171
00:11:42,268 --> 00:11:45,465
No, you don't, Nick.
I know you. You're scared.
172
00:11:45,537 --> 00:11:48,506
You're scared it's gonna
get out of control up there.
173
00:11:48,574 --> 00:11:50,974
Someday you'll be up for attorney
general and it'll haunt you.
174
00:11:51,043 --> 00:11:54,171
- I'm not having this conversation.
- You didn't even gamble.
175
00:11:54,246 --> 00:11:56,544
Not one quarter.
That's no way to live.
176
00:11:56,615 --> 00:11:59,675
In fact, that ain't even livin'.
It's hiding.
177
00:11:59,752 --> 00:12:02,414
- I'm not hiding from anything.
- Oh, no?
178
00:12:02,488 --> 00:12:04,979
Okay, then prove it.
179
00:12:05,057 --> 00:12:07,821
Do something, anything.
Break one rule.
180
00:12:07,893 --> 00:12:12,830
Here. Look. Nick, a paper.
Come on. Take it.
181
00:12:12,898 --> 00:12:16,561
Take it. Come on, Nick.
Take it.
182
00:12:20,739 --> 00:12:22,934
I have a plane to catch, okay?
183
00:12:23,008 --> 00:12:25,602
I'll see you in Chicago.
184
00:12:27,246 --> 00:12:29,908
Oh, look, I won! I won!
185
00:12:29,982 --> 00:12:32,041
Look at the money comin' down.
186
00:12:32,117 --> 00:12:35,280
Look. Look, look, look.
What's... What's...
187
00:12:35,354 --> 00:12:39,450
"You're a winner.
See guest services."
188
00:12:41,126 --> 00:12:43,856
What? A dollar?
189
00:12:48,100 --> 00:12:50,034
Come on, baby. Come on!
190
00:13:06,652 --> 00:13:07,584
Come on.
191
00:13:09,021 --> 00:13:10,283
We won!
192
00:13:12,524 --> 00:13:17,723
- We won one.
- What is this? This isn't money.
193
00:13:36,048 --> 00:13:38,278
That's the prize?
A free buffet?
194
00:13:38,350 --> 00:13:40,443
Actually, it's not a buffet.
195
00:13:40,519 --> 00:13:44,114
It's a special reception at 10:00
in the penthouse conference room.
196
00:13:44,189 --> 00:13:46,783
"Where a spectacular...
197
00:13:46,859 --> 00:13:50,022
once-in-a-lifetime
opportunity awaits you."
198
00:13:50,095 --> 00:13:52,029
That's all I know.
199
00:13:52,097 --> 00:13:54,861
- What do you think?
- I think it's some kind of scam.
200
00:13:54,933 --> 00:13:57,493
Good! A scam! We'll do it.
201
00:13:57,569 --> 00:14:00,538
- I'll need to see some I.D.
- Okay.
202
00:14:13,719 --> 00:14:15,812
There. I gambled.
203
00:14:22,394 --> 00:14:23,762
Family vacation? These are
the moments you got to savor, right?
204
00:14:23,762 --> 00:14:26,287
Family vacation? These are
the moments you got to savor, right?
205
00:14:26,365 --> 00:14:28,993
- They'll never come around again.
- Exactly.
206
00:14:29,067 --> 00:14:31,661
Excuse me.
Do you know what's going on?
207
00:14:31,737 --> 00:14:33,671
Free grub.
That's what's going on.
208
00:14:33,739 --> 00:14:36,207
This room is fabulous.
209
00:14:36,275 --> 00:14:39,574
- Does anybody know why we're here?
- Beats me.
210
00:14:40,646 --> 00:14:42,614
Oh, my God.
211
00:14:42,681 --> 00:14:44,740
You should sue somebody.
212
00:14:44,817 --> 00:14:46,341
I did it myself.
213
00:14:46,418 --> 00:14:49,854
- What?
- He did it himself from a kit.
214
00:14:49,922 --> 00:14:55,189
I knew I recognized you.
You're the referee... the bonehead.
215
00:14:55,260 --> 00:14:58,855
That's just the media
blowing it out of proportion.
216
00:14:58,931 --> 00:15:03,197
My hairdresser's husband
lost $800 because of you.
217
00:15:03,268 --> 00:15:05,793
- Everybody thinks we flip quarters.
- Can I have a picture with you?
218
00:15:05,871 --> 00:15:07,930
It's really
a commemorative coin. Look.
219
00:15:08,006 --> 00:15:09,940
- Smile.
- Please. You...
220
00:15:12,010 --> 00:15:16,538
Am I too late?
Look. I won a coin.
221
00:15:16,615 --> 00:15:21,848
A gold coin.
Isn't this wonderful?
222
00:15:21,920 --> 00:15:24,115
Look at this room.
223
00:15:24,189 --> 00:15:29,354
What a beautiful room.
Have you seen this room?
224
00:15:29,428 --> 00:15:32,420
Yes! We're in it.
225
00:15:35,200 --> 00:15:37,691
I am Enrico Pollini.
226
00:15:37,769 --> 00:15:42,069
Now, I know what you are thinking.
Enrico is a girl's name.
227
00:15:42,140 --> 00:15:44,904
- No, I wasn't.
- No pun intended.
228
00:15:44,977 --> 00:15:49,744
- What pun is that?
- Food. Look at all this food.
229
00:15:49,815 --> 00:15:55,651
What a beautiful party.
Little cockdoggies.
230
00:15:55,721 --> 00:15:57,382
They're called
cocktail wienies.
231
00:15:57,456 --> 00:16:02,325
Wienies. I'm so sorry.
My English is not so good.
232
00:16:02,394 --> 00:16:05,158
But I'm learning.
233
00:16:05,230 --> 00:16:07,698
That's it. Vera.
We're outta here.
234
00:16:07,766 --> 00:16:10,098
- I want to say good-bye. Bye, y'all.
- Excuse me.
235
00:16:10,168 --> 00:16:15,037
Thank you all for coming. I'm
Donald Sinclair. I own this hotel.
236
00:16:15,107 --> 00:16:17,268
We don't have much time.
237
00:16:17,342 --> 00:16:23,042
There's a meteor the size of North
Carolina heading straight for Earth.
238
00:16:23,115 --> 00:16:28,382
The impact is going to kill every
thing and everyone on this planet.
239
00:16:28,453 --> 00:16:33,288
I built a bunker in the basement
strong enough to withstand the blast.
240
00:16:33,358 --> 00:16:36,418
There's room for eight people. I have
chosen the seven of you, plus me.
241
00:16:36,495 --> 00:16:42,195
When this is over, we will repopulate
and re-civilize the planet.
242
00:16:51,209 --> 00:16:55,543
I couldn't resist! I'm sorry.
243
00:16:59,051 --> 00:17:01,713
A joke. He made a joke.
244
00:17:01,787 --> 00:17:06,156
Do sit down, please. Merrill, you
and your mother can sit over here.
245
00:17:06,224 --> 00:17:09,887
- How do you know she's my mother?
- Alas, there are no secrets anymore.
246
00:17:09,962 --> 00:17:14,228
Actually, that's not quite true.
There is one secret, one last secret.
247
00:17:14,299 --> 00:17:18,793
It involves all of you.
248
00:17:20,272 --> 00:17:23,730
- I'm getting goose pimples.
- Hey...
249
00:17:24,776 --> 00:17:26,573
Ah, Mr. Schaffer!
250
00:17:26,645 --> 00:17:30,376
Curiosity got the better
of you, eh? Come and sit down.
251
00:17:30,449 --> 00:17:34,351
- I'm fine. Thanks.
- You haven't missed anything.
252
00:17:34,419 --> 00:17:36,387
We were just
cutting to the chase.
253
00:17:36,455 --> 00:17:39,219
Cutting to the chase.
254
00:17:42,628 --> 00:17:44,721
Well, you'll laugh later.
255
00:17:44,796 --> 00:17:48,562
Now, as you know, the odds against
winning a jackpot downstairs...
256
00:17:48,634 --> 00:17:51,933
or hitting the state lottery
are astronomical... millions to one.
257
00:17:52,004 --> 00:17:55,701
A serious person doesn't
even bother, but today...
258
00:17:55,774 --> 00:17:59,175
you have the chance
of playing a game...
259
00:17:59,244 --> 00:18:02,111
where the odds of winning
are one in six.
260
00:18:02,180 --> 00:18:05,047
One in six.
261
00:18:06,284 --> 00:18:07,683
It's one throw...
262
00:18:10,155 --> 00:18:12,180
of the dice.
263
00:18:16,328 --> 00:18:18,660
This is my attorney,
Mr. Grisham...
264
00:18:18,730 --> 00:18:22,097
who tragically was born
without a personality.
265
00:18:22,167 --> 00:18:26,570
Mr. Grisham insists anyone who wishes
to participate in our experiment...
266
00:18:26,638 --> 00:18:31,575
sign this waiver, absolving the casino
from responsibility or damages...
267
00:18:31,643 --> 00:18:35,477
personal liability,
blah, blah, blah.
268
00:18:35,547 --> 00:18:38,948
So, who do you like, Claude?
269
00:18:39,017 --> 00:18:42,009
The young woman in the black coat.
She looks desperate.
270
00:18:42,087 --> 00:18:44,521
Yes, but she has
her mother with her.
271
00:18:44,589 --> 00:18:48,286
- That could slow her down, hmm?
- Perhaps.
272
00:18:48,360 --> 00:18:51,796
Now, 563 miles from here...
273
00:18:51,863 --> 00:18:54,957
is a little town called
Silver City, New Mexico.
274
00:18:55,033 --> 00:18:57,297
- Gold rush.
- Quite right, Nick.
275
00:18:57,369 --> 00:18:59,735
Yes, they struck gold there
in 1860.
276
00:18:59,805 --> 00:19:02,575
It was the second largest
gold rush in American history.
277
00:19:02,708 --> 00:19:07,236
Very good, Nick. I think
Nick should be our captain.
278
00:19:10,182 --> 00:19:13,845
In downtown Silver City,
there's a train station.
279
00:19:13,919 --> 00:19:16,649
As you go in the front door,
there's some lockers on the right.
280
00:19:16,722 --> 00:19:19,122
Mr. Grisham,
do you have the keys?
281
00:19:20,192 --> 00:19:22,183
Six identical keys.
282
00:19:23,062 --> 00:19:25,360
They all open the same locker.
283
00:19:25,431 --> 00:19:28,298
That's locker 001.
284
00:19:28,367 --> 00:19:32,064
Inside the locker is a red duffel
bag. Inside the red duffel bag...
285
00:19:32,137 --> 00:19:34,435
is $2 million.
286
00:19:34,506 --> 00:19:39,307
In cash, fifties and hundreds,
makes a pile about so big.
287
00:19:39,378 --> 00:19:42,404
First one there keeps it all.
288
00:19:44,116 --> 00:19:48,815
I put transmitting devices in
your key rings to keep track of you.
289
00:19:48,887 --> 00:19:52,948
And that's it.
290
00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:53,957
Go.
291
00:19:56,662 --> 00:19:58,994
You just can't pick people
at random.
292
00:19:59,064 --> 00:20:01,430
I can do anything I like, Owen.
I'm eccentric.
293
00:20:03,068 --> 00:20:04,000
Go!
294
00:20:04,069 --> 00:20:06,799
Wait, wait.
So, it's like a race?
295
00:20:07,973 --> 00:20:10,203
A race. It's a race.
296
00:20:10,275 --> 00:20:12,368
I hope I win.
297
00:20:12,444 --> 00:20:14,742
What are the rules?
298
00:20:14,813 --> 00:20:18,579
There's only one rule.
Are you ready? Here it is.
299
00:20:19,318 --> 00:20:22,685
There are no rules.
300
00:20:22,755 --> 00:20:24,689
Go.
301
00:20:26,492 --> 00:20:27,982
Go!
302
00:20:28,060 --> 00:20:32,394
So now when you say, "Go,"
you mean just go?
303
00:20:32,464 --> 00:20:35,922
Begin, commence, start moving.
304
00:20:36,001 --> 00:20:39,937
Theoretically, you have been
racing for about 40 seconds.
305
00:20:40,005 --> 00:20:42,530
So far, Mr. Schaffer is winning...
306
00:20:42,608 --> 00:20:45,543
because he's nearest to the door.
307
00:20:53,452 --> 00:20:55,215
You're crazy!
308
00:20:55,287 --> 00:20:59,314
A race! A race!
You have to pace yourself.
309
00:20:59,391 --> 00:21:03,327
Carbohydrate is important.
Pasta is good.
310
00:21:03,395 --> 00:21:06,023
Breathing is important.
311
00:21:07,499 --> 00:21:10,957
Scusi. One...
312
00:21:11,837 --> 00:21:14,704
It's some sort of joke.
It has to be.
313
00:21:14,773 --> 00:21:18,106
What kind of jackass
just gives away $2 million?
314
00:21:18,177 --> 00:21:20,702
Maybe it's a publicity stunt.
315
00:21:20,779 --> 00:21:24,112
What kind of publicity?
He swore us all to secrecy.
316
00:21:24,183 --> 00:21:28,984
- Maybe it's a secret publicity stunt.
- A secret publicity stunt?
317
00:21:29,054 --> 00:21:30,487
Yes!
318
00:21:30,556 --> 00:21:32,615
I don't know what his angle is,
but there's always an angle.
319
00:21:32,691 --> 00:21:35,751
Donald Sinclair... People like him
make millions of dollars...
320
00:21:35,828 --> 00:21:38,558
playing people
like us for chumps.
321
00:21:38,630 --> 00:21:40,825
- I'm nobody's chump.
- So you don't believe...
322
00:21:40,899 --> 00:21:44,733
11:30, nonstop to Chicago.
I'm gonna be on it.
323
00:21:45,471 --> 00:21:47,666
You know what? He's right.
324
00:21:47,740 --> 00:21:50,231
I'm not cuttin' short
my first family vacation...
325
00:21:50,309 --> 00:21:52,834
in three years to go on
some half-assed wild goose chase.
326
00:21:52,911 --> 00:21:56,642
Okay, so,
you're not goin' for it?
327
00:21:58,717 --> 00:22:00,412
I don't think so.
328
00:22:00,486 --> 00:22:03,114
- Not me, no.
- No. Great.
329
00:22:03,188 --> 00:22:05,622
- I guess that's that, huh?
- Right.
330
00:22:05,691 --> 00:22:08,387
It was nice meetin' y'all.
I'm gonna take the stairs.
331
00:22:08,460 --> 00:22:11,429
My room's just two floors down,
so nice meetin' ya.
332
00:22:11,497 --> 00:22:13,727
Hey, have a nice vacation.
333
00:22:21,173 --> 00:22:23,198
You know, it's probably stuck.
334
00:22:24,343 --> 00:22:27,312
I think I'm gonna
take the stairs too.
335
00:22:35,621 --> 00:22:36,883
Crap.
336
00:22:39,958 --> 00:22:42,324
- Go, go, go, go!
- Come on, Vera!
337
00:22:47,065 --> 00:22:49,659
Watch out!
338
00:22:50,903 --> 00:22:53,064
Comin' through!
339
00:22:57,843 --> 00:22:59,538
Hold the door, please.
340
00:22:59,611 --> 00:23:02,375
Take your time. No rush.
341
00:23:02,447 --> 00:23:04,472
- Get up!
- Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!
342
00:23:04,550 --> 00:23:09,214
If we're all gonna go for it,
why don't we go for it together?
343
00:23:09,288 --> 00:23:12,314
You know, split the money 50-50.
344
00:23:12,391 --> 00:23:16,191
- Fifty-fifty?
- You know what I mean. Whatever.
345
00:23:16,261 --> 00:23:18,195
Yes, yes, that's a good plan.
346
00:23:18,263 --> 00:23:21,357
It's a race. It's a race.
347
00:23:21,433 --> 00:23:24,561
I'm winning. I'm winning.
348
00:23:27,806 --> 00:23:29,569
And they're off!
349
00:23:30,776 --> 00:23:35,873
No one... No one is offering you
action like this.
350
00:23:35,948 --> 00:23:39,111
A horse race with animals
that can think and plan...
351
00:23:39,184 --> 00:23:44,019
and lie and cheat
and play dirty.
352
00:23:44,089 --> 00:23:47,354
It's the gambling experience
of a lifetime.
353
00:23:47,426 --> 00:23:51,726
It's my way of saying
I understand men like you.
354
00:23:51,797 --> 00:23:53,628
I know what you want.
I know what you need.
355
00:23:53,699 --> 00:23:58,602
This casino... my casino...
is where you belong.
356
00:24:00,873 --> 00:24:03,307
- I got it!
- Excuse me!
357
00:24:03,375 --> 00:24:05,741
- To the airport.
- You got it.
358
00:24:05,811 --> 00:24:08,439
We're out the door.
I don't see you. Where are you?
359
00:24:08,513 --> 00:24:12,916
- I forgot to tip the maid.
- Forget the maid. There he is!
360
00:24:12,985 --> 00:24:15,385
- Come on! Let's go!
- Okay, okay.
361
00:24:16,455 --> 00:24:20,721
Bev, this is a real job!
I swear!
362
00:24:22,127 --> 00:24:23,458
What is it?
363
00:24:25,631 --> 00:24:27,656
The job? What's the job?
364
00:24:29,835 --> 00:24:32,235
Ink for fountain pens.
365
00:24:34,673 --> 00:24:37,642
- And they're in New Mexico?
- Silver City, New Mexico.
366
00:24:37,709 --> 00:24:41,440
I love New Mexico.
Honey, we'll go with you.
367
00:24:41,513 --> 00:24:44,277
- No!
- Why not?
368
00:24:45,150 --> 00:24:49,280
Because we've already paid for the
room. Now look who's wasting money.
369
00:24:50,355 --> 00:24:52,323
This was your idea to stop here.
370
00:24:52,391 --> 00:24:55,360
I don't care about David Copperfield.
We're on vacation. We'll go with you.
371
00:24:55,427 --> 00:24:58,919
- But you don't understand...
- We will go with you!
372
00:25:02,334 --> 00:25:03,358
- Fine.
- Yes!
373
00:25:03,435 --> 00:25:06,370
Fine. Fine. Here. Call the bellman.
Have him bring the van around.
374
00:25:06,438 --> 00:25:08,531
- You happy? You happy?
- Okay.
375
00:25:08,607 --> 00:25:13,067
Scusi. Scusi.
I'm in a race. Scusi.
376
00:25:13,145 --> 00:25:15,909
Scusi. It's a race.
377
00:25:30,095 --> 00:25:33,622
- What is he doing?
- I think he's sleeping.
378
00:25:33,699 --> 00:25:35,667
- Sleeping?
- He must be narcoleptic.
379
00:25:35,734 --> 00:25:37,668
It's a rare sleeping disorder.
380
00:25:37,736 --> 00:25:41,103
- But I bet on him!
- So did I. Two million dollars.
381
00:25:41,173 --> 00:25:43,698
I'm sorry, gentlemen.
All the bets are locked in.
382
00:25:43,775 --> 00:25:45,743
Sleeping! Sleeping!
383
00:25:54,252 --> 00:25:56,345
- Look out!
- Don't tell me how to drive!
384
00:25:56,421 --> 00:25:58,048
It's only yellow.
It's only yellow. Run it!
385
00:26:00,092 --> 00:26:03,755
- Where's my video game?
- Seat belts, everyone.
386
00:26:03,829 --> 00:26:08,232
- Honey, what is the rush?
- It's the opportunity of a lifetime.
387
00:26:08,300 --> 00:26:11,064
You're not just a travel agent,
Roger. You're an angel.
388
00:26:11,136 --> 00:26:13,730
There's one charter plane
available in Las Vegas.
389
00:26:13,805 --> 00:26:15,773
We just bagged it.
390
00:26:15,841 --> 00:26:17,775
- Back to pass.
- Get rid of it.
391
00:26:17,843 --> 00:26:21,335
- Looks to his left.
- Get rid of it. Throw the ball!
392
00:26:21,413 --> 00:26:23,938
That's why you're not
gonna get drafted!
393
00:26:24,016 --> 00:26:27,042
You'll be lucky to play
arena football in Barcelona!
394
00:26:27,119 --> 00:26:29,952
- You like football?
- Sure.
395
00:26:30,022 --> 00:26:34,049
Did you happen to catch
that Dallas game last week?
396
00:26:34,126 --> 00:26:39,189
It was an obscenity.
It was a crime against football.
397
00:26:39,264 --> 00:26:41,994
I lost 20 grand on that game!
And they would have won!
398
00:26:42,067 --> 00:26:45,525
Now I gotta work two shifts
because of that idiot!
399
00:26:45,604 --> 00:26:49,768
Stevie Wonder could have done
a better job calling that game.
400
00:26:51,977 --> 00:26:53,911
Where the hell's the airport?
401
00:26:55,914 --> 00:26:59,509
One flip of the coin and the franchise
goes straight down the crapper.
402
00:26:59,584 --> 00:27:01,711
- That'll be 10.50, buddy.
- Keep the change.
403
00:27:02,821 --> 00:27:06,382
Thanks a lot.
You have a nice flight. Yeah!
404
00:27:06,458 --> 00:27:08,585
You know who that was?
405
00:27:08,660 --> 00:27:12,687
That was the ref. The guy
from the game? The coin toss!
406
00:27:12,764 --> 00:27:15,699
Oh, my God!
You're right! That was him!
407
00:27:15,767 --> 00:27:18,069
I had him in the cab,
and I let him go!
408
00:27:18,202 --> 00:27:20,864
- Where are we going?
- We gotta go. Come on. Just go.
409
00:27:20,938 --> 00:27:24,169
- Go, go, go, go, go.
- Chumps.
410
00:27:49,533 --> 00:27:51,694
Excuse me. Hi.
411
00:27:52,436 --> 00:27:55,872
- I'm not a creep or anything.
- I don't have any quarters.
412
00:27:58,209 --> 00:28:01,474
I never do this, but I'm
reading the same book you are.
413
00:28:01,545 --> 00:28:03,706
Look. See? Lindbergh.
414
00:28:03,781 --> 00:28:05,715
It's fantastic, isn't it?
415
00:28:05,783 --> 00:28:09,617
- What part are you on?
- He just had a sex change.
416
00:28:09,687 --> 00:28:11,780
Who did? Lindbergh?
417
00:28:11,856 --> 00:28:14,290
- Sex change?
- Yeah.
418
00:28:18,395 --> 00:28:19,692
That's funny.
419
00:28:19,763 --> 00:28:21,560
- I thought so.
- That's funny.
420
00:28:21,632 --> 00:28:23,566
I wouldn't be too proud
of yourself though.
421
00:28:23,634 --> 00:28:25,568
I'm the most gullible guy
in Chicago.
422
00:28:29,106 --> 00:28:30,664
Can I buy you a drink?
423
00:28:31,675 --> 00:28:33,233
I can't. I'm flying.
424
00:28:33,310 --> 00:28:38,407
- So, it'll relax you.
- I mean, I'm flying. I'm a pilot.
425
00:28:41,819 --> 00:28:44,652
Pilot? Are there
a lot of female pilots?
426
00:28:45,723 --> 00:28:47,315
There's at least one.
427
00:28:50,494 --> 00:28:53,895
When I walk away, I'm gonna think
of something great to say to that.
428
00:28:53,964 --> 00:28:56,592
Good. Mail it to me.
429
00:29:01,772 --> 00:29:04,036
Flight 115 to
Albuquerque, New Mexico.
430
00:29:04,108 --> 00:29:07,134
- Gate 17. You better hurry.
- Four tickets to Albuquerque.
431
00:29:07,211 --> 00:29:10,044
- Near the front of the plane. Please.
- All right.
432
00:29:10,114 --> 00:29:12,048
Come on!
433
00:29:12,950 --> 00:29:16,078
This is so exciting. I've never
been on a private plane before.
434
00:29:16,153 --> 00:29:18,178
This is bigger than my condo.
435
00:29:18,255 --> 00:29:20,951
- Gentlemen, what's our ETA?
- One hour and ten minutes.
436
00:29:21,725 --> 00:29:24,193
If you can do it in less than
an hour, I'll buy you both dinner.
437
00:29:24,261 --> 00:29:25,956
You're on...
438
00:29:26,030 --> 00:29:29,056
- Watch it. Move. Excuse me. Move.
- Move! Move! Move!
439
00:29:29,133 --> 00:29:31,067
- Who was next?
- I was!
440
00:29:31,135 --> 00:29:32,397
- I was!
- I was!
441
00:29:32,469 --> 00:29:35,199
- What? You were not next!
- Are you callin' me a liar?
442
00:29:35,272 --> 00:29:38,969
Yeah, as a matter of fact, I am.
We've been in line over 20 minutes.
443
00:29:39,043 --> 00:29:42,410
- Is that the correct time?
- Hey! Whoa!
444
00:29:42,479 --> 00:29:44,709
Yes, it is.
445
00:29:45,716 --> 00:29:47,980
- Who's next?
- They were, right there.
446
00:29:48,052 --> 00:29:50,816
Two tickets to Albuquerque.
447
00:29:50,888 --> 00:29:55,257
I'm sorry. We're completely booked.
There's nothing.
448
00:29:55,326 --> 00:29:58,090
There's a 4:30,
but you have to switch in Dallas.
449
00:30:02,800 --> 00:30:07,601
What do you mean that's it? I'm
not givin' up and neither are you.
450
00:30:07,671 --> 00:30:11,368
And neither am I!
I'll tell you something, brother.
451
00:30:11,442 --> 00:30:15,378
If we're not flyin' outta here,
no one is flyin' outta here.
452
00:31:15,306 --> 00:31:16,739
That can't be good.
453
00:31:24,148 --> 00:31:26,742
Duane!
454
00:31:38,829 --> 00:31:40,319
No!
455
00:31:48,739 --> 00:31:51,264
Blaine! Blaine!
456
00:31:54,311 --> 00:31:58,008
Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit!
457
00:32:04,388 --> 00:32:06,015
Shit!
458
00:32:16,867 --> 00:32:20,234
I can't!
459
00:32:20,304 --> 00:32:24,434
What are you doin'?
I don't know where to go!
460
00:32:24,508 --> 00:32:26,442
- Move!
- Trying to kill me?
461
00:32:26,510 --> 00:32:30,810
Duane, stop the car!
Stop the car!
462
00:32:41,892 --> 00:32:45,919
Whoa, girl! Jesus!
463
00:32:59,309 --> 00:33:02,745
Freeze everything, every flight.
Get me Central Operations.
464
00:33:05,015 --> 00:33:06,949
Attention all passengers.
465
00:33:07,017 --> 00:33:09,485
Due to a technical problem
with our radar tracking system...
466
00:33:09,553 --> 00:33:12,021
all flights are postponed
until further notice.
467
00:33:12,089 --> 00:33:15,286
We apologize for
any inconvenience.
468
00:33:16,860 --> 00:33:17,792
We gotta go.
469
00:33:17,861 --> 00:33:19,158
- Hurry up!
- The bags?
470
00:33:19,229 --> 00:33:21,163
Forget the bags! Let's go!
471
00:33:21,231 --> 00:33:23,529
Comin' through!
472
00:33:24,601 --> 00:33:27,832
- This is your license?
- Yes, it is.
473
00:33:28,906 --> 00:33:30,840
- Where was it issued?
- In Guam.
474
00:33:34,778 --> 00:33:37,440
Just head east,
and I'm in a hurry.
475
00:33:38,315 --> 00:33:42,718
Hello again. East it is.
476
00:33:44,254 --> 00:33:47,314
We have a midsized Caprice.
477
00:33:47,391 --> 00:33:49,985
- What color is it?
- We don't care about color.
478
00:33:50,060 --> 00:33:52,688
Just give us whatever car
is parked closest to the door.
479
00:33:52,763 --> 00:33:55,288
Ask about insurance.
480
00:33:55,365 --> 00:33:58,664
Would you be interested
in purchasing liability insurance?
481
00:33:58,735 --> 00:34:01,329
- How much is it?
- It doesn't matter. We'll take it.
482
00:34:01,405 --> 00:34:03,396
Just hurry.
483
00:34:06,643 --> 00:34:09,806
Hit enter. Now shift.
484
00:34:10,881 --> 00:34:13,247
Shift key. Right there. Yeah.
485
00:34:16,987 --> 00:34:18,420
Hey, watch it!
486
00:34:18,489 --> 00:34:21,686
Bus! White people!
487
00:34:24,561 --> 00:34:25,493
Idiot!
488
00:34:26,563 --> 00:34:28,690
Okay, I've got one.
489
00:34:29,766 --> 00:34:32,064
- What?
- A great comeback.
490
00:34:34,338 --> 00:34:36,397
I said, "Are there
a lot of female pilots?"
491
00:34:36,473 --> 00:34:38,464
And you said,
"There's at least one."
492
00:34:38,542 --> 00:34:42,000
I should have said,
"Two if you count Lindbergh."
493
00:34:43,113 --> 00:34:45,104
'Cause you said
he had a sex change.
494
00:34:45,782 --> 00:34:47,716
It's a work in progress.
495
00:34:47,784 --> 00:34:50,116
- I'm Nick Schaffer.
- Tracy Faucet.
496
00:34:50,187 --> 00:34:52,178
So I guess you can have
that drink now.
497
00:34:52,256 --> 00:34:55,714
I told you I'm flying. I'm leaving
for Roswell in five minutes.
498
00:34:55,792 --> 00:34:58,056
Didn't you hear?
Everybody's grounded.
499
00:34:58,128 --> 00:35:02,258
That's for fixed wing. I'm in a
chopper. We use a different system.
500
00:35:08,505 --> 00:35:10,939
Roswell, New Mexico?
501
00:35:12,476 --> 00:35:15,775
- You're flying to New Mexico?
- We've been flying down all week.
502
00:35:15,846 --> 00:35:17,848
They're repainting
the whole fleet.
503
00:35:21,852 --> 00:35:26,152
You can fly.
Nobody else can fly.
504
00:35:26,223 --> 00:35:29,317
But you can fly.
505
00:35:29,392 --> 00:35:32,384
- And you're flying to New Mexico.
- Yeah.
506
00:35:32,462 --> 00:35:35,556
- But nobody else can fly.
- Yeah.
507
00:35:35,632 --> 00:35:38,897
Do you need a ride?
508
00:35:42,372 --> 00:35:44,897
Come on!
509
00:35:50,313 --> 00:35:53,111
- Coconut.
- Coconut! Who had coconut?
510
00:35:53,183 --> 00:35:55,981
I did.
511
00:35:56,052 --> 00:35:57,781
Phil.
512
00:35:59,356 --> 00:36:01,449
That's the kind of car
that I'm gettin'.
513
00:36:01,524 --> 00:36:04,288
- Yeah? Don't count on it.
- Why not?
514
00:36:04,361 --> 00:36:07,353
Because the Volkswagen Beetle
was used by the Nazis.
515
00:36:07,430 --> 00:36:10,695
I would not be comfortable
driving around in one.
516
00:36:10,767 --> 00:36:15,204
- So, don't drive it. I will.
- Dad, I have to go.
517
00:36:15,272 --> 00:36:18,764
- No, you don't.
- Yes, I do. I really do.
518
00:36:18,842 --> 00:36:23,142
- We just stopped!
- The bathroom was too gross.
519
00:36:23,213 --> 00:36:27,309
- Well, can't you hold it in?
- I can't! It's an emergency.
520
00:36:27,384 --> 00:36:29,318
Honey, there's a restaurant.
521
00:36:29,386 --> 00:36:32,355
That's three miles down and
then back. We lose ten minutes.
522
00:36:32,422 --> 00:36:34,652
So what? Your daughter
has to go to the bathroom.
523
00:36:34,724 --> 00:36:37,124
- Please stop, Dad.
- All right.
524
00:36:37,193 --> 00:36:39,821
Jason, look back there
for an empty jar.
525
00:36:39,896 --> 00:36:41,955
Ajar? Girls don't pee in jars.
526
00:36:42,032 --> 00:36:43,966
All right, sorry.
527
00:36:44,034 --> 00:36:47,697
Jason, we're gonna
need a jar and a funnel.
528
00:36:47,771 --> 00:36:50,365
Dad, I don't have to pee.
It's number two!
529
00:36:50,440 --> 00:36:54,877
- Sorry, I can't stop.
- Dad, I'm prairie-dogging it.
530
00:36:54,945 --> 00:36:56,378
What does that mean?
531
00:36:56,446 --> 00:37:00,143
Like when a prairie dog sticks
his head in and out of the ground.
532
00:37:04,788 --> 00:37:07,313
I do not want
to picture that.
533
00:37:08,391 --> 00:37:11,019
Yes, sir, Silver City it is.
534
00:37:11,094 --> 00:37:14,393
- Buddy.
- It's about 700 miles.
535
00:37:14,464 --> 00:37:18,833
- You don't mind, do ya?
- Oh, no. No, no, I don't mind.
536
00:37:18,902 --> 00:37:22,303
A job's just
another job for me.
537
00:37:22,372 --> 00:37:25,364
About how much you think
that's gonna cost?
538
00:37:25,442 --> 00:37:30,175
I wouldn't worry about it.
Tell you what.
539
00:37:30,246 --> 00:37:34,444
You just pay me
whatever you think is fair...
540
00:37:34,517 --> 00:37:39,352
'cause I trust your judgment.
541
00:37:39,422 --> 00:37:42,414
I hate you. I hate you!
542
00:37:42,492 --> 00:37:46,758
Nobody look. I'm gonna turn on
the radio, so nobody can hear you.
543
00:37:46,830 --> 00:37:48,764
I'll never forgive you.
I hate you.
544
00:37:48,832 --> 00:37:51,426
Nobody can hear you, honey.
Push away.
545
00:38:00,043 --> 00:38:03,171
I'm gonna drop you off there. There's
a parking lot near the hospital.
546
00:38:03,246 --> 00:38:06,773
- Great. Great.
- So what's wrong with her?
547
00:38:06,850 --> 00:38:09,751
- Who?
- Your sister. You said it's serious.
548
00:38:12,389 --> 00:38:14,653
Yeah. Shark bite.
549
00:38:15,725 --> 00:38:18,489
- A shark bite?
- Yeah.
550
00:38:18,561 --> 00:38:21,189
They took her to Silver City?
551
00:38:21,264 --> 00:38:24,631
They have a really good
shark attack unit there.
552
00:38:32,575 --> 00:38:34,509
How fast was I going?
553
00:38:42,152 --> 00:38:46,111
- Where are we?
- It's a shortcut I know.
554
00:38:46,189 --> 00:38:50,182
- Maybe we should stick to the highway.
- There's a thought.
555
00:38:50,260 --> 00:38:54,492
You say stick to the highway.
I say we should take my shortcut.
556
00:38:54,564 --> 00:38:59,263
- Why don't we just flip a coin?
- It's not what you think.
557
00:38:59,335 --> 00:39:02,634
- Come on, you blind son of a bitch!
- Wait! Stop it!
558
00:39:02,705 --> 00:39:06,436
Give me that goddamn whistle!
I'm gonna shove it up your ass!
559
00:39:06,509 --> 00:39:08,704
Come back here!
560
00:39:11,948 --> 00:39:14,746
Shit.
561
00:39:16,953 --> 00:39:19,478
I'll kill him.
562
00:39:36,940 --> 00:39:38,908
- Squirrel?
- No, thank you.
563
00:39:38,975 --> 00:39:41,409
We're looking for the interstate.
564
00:39:41,478 --> 00:39:45,005
I get that a lot
'cause of the detour.
565
00:39:46,316 --> 00:39:49,149
Now they've lost their way.
566
00:39:49,219 --> 00:39:53,383
Now they can't go home.
You sure you don't want one?
567
00:39:53,456 --> 00:39:55,151
We're sure. Thank you.
568
00:39:55,225 --> 00:39:58,888
They make crackerjack pets.
I taught this one to shake hands.
569
00:39:58,962 --> 00:40:03,058
He's not for sale though. Who wants
to go home with the nice ladies?
570
00:40:03,133 --> 00:40:06,432
"Pick me. Pick me.
Don't be afraid. I don't bite.
571
00:40:06,503 --> 00:40:10,872
- What's your name, pretty lady?"
- Vera.
572
00:40:10,940 --> 00:40:13,340
Ma'am, really.
We're not interested.
573
00:40:13,409 --> 00:40:16,503
Well, I'm not talkin' to you, am I?
I'm talkin' to Vera.
574
00:40:16,579 --> 00:40:21,016
What about Bucky here? He loves
to climb trees and eat nuts.
575
00:40:21,084 --> 00:40:23,177
Ma'am, we do not
want a squirrel.
576
00:40:23,253 --> 00:40:25,380
Do you or do you not know
where the interstate is?
577
00:40:25,455 --> 00:40:28,856
Of course I do. I'm not retarded.
"Tell 'em about the shortcut."
578
00:40:28,925 --> 00:40:31,291
Thank you, Bucky.
579
00:40:31,361 --> 00:40:34,797
I almost forgot.
There's a dandy shortcut.
580
00:40:34,864 --> 00:40:37,560
It'll bring you right to exit 14.
It'll save you 30 miles.
581
00:40:38,601 --> 00:40:40,694
Now listen carefully.
582
00:40:40,770 --> 00:40:44,228
You want to go straight
down here exactly 1.8 miles.
583
00:40:44,307 --> 00:40:48,607
- 1.8.
- Make a left at Totem Pole Ranch.
584
00:40:48,678 --> 00:40:51,442
Go 5.4 miles and
you're gonna go up a big hill.
585
00:40:51,514 --> 00:40:55,109
You'll see a big yellow sign
with some graffiti on it.
586
00:40:55,185 --> 00:40:59,747
Take the dirt road on the right.
It'll take you to the interstate.
587
00:40:59,822 --> 00:41:01,084
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
588
00:41:01,157 --> 00:41:05,526
Wait a minute.
Take some nuts with you...
589
00:41:05,595 --> 00:41:08,257
just in case
you see a squirrel, okay?
590
00:41:09,732 --> 00:41:14,169
"Bye. Bye.
You could have bought me."
591
00:41:14,237 --> 00:41:16,967
You'll make it. You'll make it.
592
00:41:23,580 --> 00:41:25,275
Where am I?
593
00:41:28,818 --> 00:41:31,946
Wow! A Barbie Museum!
Can we stop?
594
00:41:32,021 --> 00:41:36,355
Sorry, Kimmy. We have a plan,
and we're gonna stick to the plan.
595
00:41:36,426 --> 00:41:38,860
Please, Daddy. Please, please,
please, please, please.
596
00:41:38,928 --> 00:41:41,328
- Hey, hey!
- It's not fair.
597
00:41:41,397 --> 00:41:44,025
We never get to stop
anywhere I want to.
598
00:41:44,100 --> 00:41:47,331
I'm sure Jason doesn't want
to go to the Barbie Museum.
599
00:41:47,403 --> 00:41:50,839
You kiddin'? I'll stop anywhere.
I'm wiggin' out back here.
600
00:41:50,907 --> 00:41:54,536
You need to pull over and stop
to give the kids a break.
601
00:41:54,611 --> 00:41:56,511
Yeah, okay,
maybe on the way back.
602
00:41:56,579 --> 00:41:58,604
- Stop the car.
- I can't do that.
603
00:41:58,681 --> 00:42:00,672
- We all need to stop the car.
- No can do.
604
00:42:00,750 --> 00:42:03,116
- You need to stop the car.
- No!
605
00:42:03,186 --> 00:42:04,653
Stop the car!
606
00:42:11,361 --> 00:42:13,886
Okay, fine, but 10 minutes.
607
00:42:13,963 --> 00:42:17,296
Wow! The Barbie Museum.
608
00:42:18,368 --> 00:42:19,699
Klaus Barbie...
609
00:42:19,769 --> 00:42:22,067
sometimes known as
the Butcher of Lyons.
610
00:42:22,138 --> 00:42:26,165
Let the Jew revisionists
talk about their death camps...
611
00:42:26,242 --> 00:42:29,177
and so-called crimes
against humanity.
612
00:42:29,245 --> 00:42:34,706
This museum is lovingly dedicated to
the Klaus Barbie that nobody knows.
613
00:42:34,784 --> 00:42:38,550
The husband, the devoted father,
the wine connoisseur...
614
00:42:38,621 --> 00:42:41,556
and three-time
ballroom dancing champion.
615
00:42:48,665 --> 00:42:51,429
Hey, hey, there's that guy,
the "udgy" one.
616
00:42:53,803 --> 00:42:57,170
Barbie joined
the SS in 1935...
617
00:42:57,240 --> 00:43:01,074
where he soon became one of
the Fuhrer's favorite young officers.
618
00:43:01,144 --> 00:43:03,578
Can we go?
619
00:43:03,646 --> 00:43:06,843
Here we see him standing
beside Hitler's touring car...
620
00:43:06,916 --> 00:43:11,046
the very same car on display
outside in our courtyard.
621
00:43:11,120 --> 00:43:12,382
You're leaving?
622
00:43:13,956 --> 00:43:16,015
What...
623
00:43:16,092 --> 00:43:20,825
No... Yes. Well, we have a 4:30
book burning, and then we have a...
624
00:43:20,897 --> 00:43:22,922
- A christening.
- Yes, a christening...
625
00:43:22,999 --> 00:43:27,026
for one of our many white,
Christian, non-Jewish friends...
626
00:43:27,103 --> 00:43:32,769
- Family. Blood relatives.
- The Himmler Hessin Von Sturichberg...
627
00:43:32,842 --> 00:43:35,333
- Thank you so much.
- Yes, love your do.
628
00:43:35,411 --> 00:43:37,436
Thank you. It's beautiful.
We had a great time.
629
00:43:38,781 --> 00:43:40,442
Wow! A gift shop.
630
00:43:40,516 --> 00:43:43,815
Yes, I know, honey. Next time.
I promise. I really do.
631
00:43:43,886 --> 00:43:45,877
Just go. Just go.
632
00:43:45,955 --> 00:43:50,654
- Oh, my God! We've been cut!
- What do we do now?
633
00:43:51,728 --> 00:43:53,195
I say we take
the interstate.
634
00:43:53,262 --> 00:43:56,789
No, "ake" Highway "well."
That's a shortcut.
635
00:43:56,866 --> 00:44:00,563
You don't know what the shortcut
is. It could be a dirt road.
636
00:44:00,636 --> 00:44:04,538
You know what? There are
"oo" of us. Why don't we separate?
637
00:44:04,607 --> 00:44:07,576
- What?
- There's "oo" of us.
638
00:44:07,643 --> 00:44:11,079
"Amy" we should "ust" separate.
639
00:44:11,147 --> 00:44:14,844
You're right. You're a genius.
There's two of us.
640
00:44:14,917 --> 00:44:17,852
If we separate and you steal a car,
we can both go our own way...
641
00:44:17,920 --> 00:44:19,888
and double our chances
of gettin' there first.
642
00:44:19,956 --> 00:44:22,516
All right. You take the...
643
00:44:22,592 --> 00:44:24,890
We only got one "ee."
644
00:44:27,330 --> 00:44:31,460
Look, there it is.
Totem Pole Ranch, turn left.
645
00:44:31,534 --> 00:44:35,868
1.8 miles exactly.
All right, squirrel lady.
646
00:44:39,876 --> 00:44:44,609
I can't believe it, Dad. You stole
Adolf Hitler's Mercedes-Benz.
647
00:44:44,680 --> 00:44:48,946
Hitler had it comin'.
What goes around comes around.
648
00:44:49,018 --> 00:44:50,986
They're gonna be pissed.
649
00:44:51,053 --> 00:44:55,615
They're always pissed. They're
Nazis. It's like it's their job.
650
00:44:55,691 --> 00:45:00,993
When we get to Silver City, we'll
call 'em. We'll work somethin' out.
651
00:45:06,536 --> 00:45:07,969
North?
652
00:45:08,037 --> 00:45:10,471
A little detour.
It'll just take a minute.
653
00:45:10,540 --> 00:45:13,065
I just wanted to say hi
to my boyfriend.
654
00:45:21,317 --> 00:45:24,980
I can't believe it.
That... That son of a bitch!
655
00:45:25,054 --> 00:45:27,079
That's Charlene's car.
656
00:45:27,156 --> 00:45:30,523
- Charlene?
- His ex-girlfriend, or so I thought.
657
00:45:30,593 --> 00:45:34,791
Come on now. I'm sure there's
a perfectly innocent explanation.
658
00:45:34,864 --> 00:45:37,890
She probably came by just
to pick up some clothes or...
659
00:45:37,967 --> 00:45:40,993
Nice and warm.
660
00:45:47,210 --> 00:45:48,734
What the...
661
00:45:48,811 --> 00:45:51,075
Get down!
662
00:45:53,015 --> 00:45:56,610
Did I come at
a bad time, asshole?
663
00:45:59,255 --> 00:46:02,622
I'll ram this helicopter
right down your throat!
664
00:46:07,763 --> 00:46:08,855
What are you doing?
665
00:46:08,931 --> 00:46:13,698
Don't worry. My father's a navy pilot.
I've been flying since I was 15.
666
00:46:13,769 --> 00:46:16,636
I'm not worried about you.
I'm worried about me.
667
00:46:16,706 --> 00:46:21,268
Shawn, you have a minute? I want
to talk about our relationship.
668
00:46:35,391 --> 00:46:37,154
Suck on that, creep!
669
00:46:39,862 --> 00:46:42,797
- That's...
- Not the truck!
670
00:46:42,865 --> 00:46:45,800
Oh, my God!
671
00:46:45,868 --> 00:46:48,063
Come on. Help me. Open it.
672
00:46:48,137 --> 00:46:49,832
I'm not comfortable...
673
00:46:49,906 --> 00:46:51,840
- Open it!
- Okay.
674
00:46:58,347 --> 00:46:59,780
She's gonna kill me.
675
00:46:59,849 --> 00:47:02,409
- We should get outta here.
- Not yet!
676
00:47:03,519 --> 00:47:07,011
You two-timing,
backstabbing snake!
677
00:47:07,089 --> 00:47:09,250
You worm! You turd!
678
00:47:12,161 --> 00:47:17,861
My God! What was I thinking?
I want my five months back!
679
00:47:19,268 --> 00:47:21,828
I'm getting the tattoo removed!
680
00:47:25,908 --> 00:47:27,876
Stop hitting me!
681
00:47:27,944 --> 00:47:31,380
Where are you goin', baby?
Wait for me!
682
00:47:50,599 --> 00:47:55,366
- I think we just killed him.
- You can't! He's like a cockroach.
683
00:48:01,477 --> 00:48:02,910
Fix the...
684
00:48:07,083 --> 00:48:09,142
Should we be this low?
685
00:48:14,357 --> 00:48:17,724
Come on. Come on.
Let's keep goin'. Come on.
686
00:48:21,230 --> 00:48:24,597
We just violated
about 115 federal laws.
687
00:48:24,667 --> 00:48:27,329
- "We"?
- I'm getting out of here. Coming?
688
00:48:29,271 --> 00:48:31,205
I know things look bad...
689
00:48:33,342 --> 00:48:35,276
Nice meeting you.
690
00:48:38,481 --> 00:48:40,506
Get out of the truck, Shawn.
691
00:48:41,951 --> 00:48:44,044
That's it, Tracy.
You and I are through.
692
00:48:47,623 --> 00:48:49,215
Wait!
693
00:48:56,732 --> 00:49:00,395
Wait. This is the first illegal thing
I've done in my adult life.
694
00:49:00,469 --> 00:49:02,403
How does it feel?
695
00:49:02,471 --> 00:49:05,804
I'm shaking, but that could be
from the helicopter crash.
696
00:49:05,875 --> 00:49:10,141
- Get out of my truck, Tracy!
- It's my truck! I paid for it!
697
00:49:10,212 --> 00:49:11,804
- Who is this?
- Nobody.
698
00:49:11,881 --> 00:49:14,406
- You are nobody.
- Nobody.
699
00:49:14,483 --> 00:49:18,476
You stay away from her, nobody,
unless you're tired of livin'.
700
00:49:18,554 --> 00:49:22,786
While you're here, do me a favor.
Charlene left a bra in the truck.
701
00:49:22,858 --> 00:49:26,259
Could you make sure
she gets it? Thanks, honey.
702
00:49:26,328 --> 00:49:27,386
Help!
703
00:50:15,678 --> 00:50:18,670
- So where's the driver?
- He's in the powder room.
704
00:50:18,747 --> 00:50:22,478
Hell's bells. We're never
gonna get to Santa Fe by 3:00.
705
00:50:22,551 --> 00:50:24,485
- This is ridiculous.
- Ridiculous.
706
00:50:24,553 --> 00:50:28,591
I really wish he'd hurry.
It just seems very unprofessional.
707
00:50:35,531 --> 00:50:38,159
Mister, you gotta help me.
My wife...
708
00:50:38,233 --> 00:50:39,666
She's out back.
She's having a baby.
709
00:50:39,735 --> 00:50:41,703
- She's having a what?
- A baby!
710
00:50:41,770 --> 00:50:43,704
- She's having a baby?
- And it's halfway out!
711
00:50:43,772 --> 00:50:46,138
I can see the head!
712
00:50:46,208 --> 00:50:49,234
- I need your jacket.
- Why?
713
00:50:50,579 --> 00:50:53,480
For her amniotic sac!
714
00:50:53,549 --> 00:50:56,177
- Her amniotic fluid is gushing out.
- Gushing?
715
00:50:56,251 --> 00:50:59,414
The jacket! The jacket!
Give me the jacket!
716
00:50:59,488 --> 00:51:02,423
- And your pants.
- My pants?
717
00:51:02,491 --> 00:51:05,824
Your pants! Yeah, for her,
you know, her "placentia"...
718
00:51:05,894 --> 00:51:08,886
you know,
and her labia and cervical...
719
00:51:08,964 --> 00:51:12,161
Mucus gushing... It's gushing.
720
00:51:12,234 --> 00:51:15,761
It's just a hole and...
721
00:51:15,838 --> 00:51:18,204
Quick! The pants.
And the hat.
722
00:51:18,273 --> 00:51:20,002
Why? Why my hat?
723
00:51:22,111 --> 00:51:23,544
For her...
724
00:51:25,280 --> 00:51:26,542
vagina.
725
00:51:29,918 --> 00:51:32,011
Let's go, ladies.
All aboard. We're on our way.
726
00:51:32,087 --> 00:51:36,615
- What happened to Marty?
- His wife's having a baby.
727
00:51:36,691 --> 00:51:40,422
- A baby?
- I'm Owen, your new driver. Let's go.
728
00:51:41,329 --> 00:51:42,921
Quiet. Quiet, everybody.
729
00:51:42,998 --> 00:51:44,932
Simmer down. Hey!
730
00:51:45,667 --> 00:51:48,966
We're gonna be under way
in just a minute. This is Owen.
731
00:51:49,037 --> 00:51:51,870
He's our new driver.
732
00:51:51,940 --> 00:51:54,408
Everyone say hello.
733
00:51:54,476 --> 00:51:58,378
Hello, Owen!
734
00:51:58,446 --> 00:52:01,006
Our next stop is
the third annual...
735
00:52:01,082 --> 00:52:05,109
I Love Lucy convention
in Santa Fe, New Mexico.
736
00:52:05,186 --> 00:52:08,952
- What do ya say?
- Ba-ba-loo!
737
00:52:23,171 --> 00:52:25,469
Ohh! Ohh!
738
00:52:42,424 --> 00:52:45,484
- Is he dead?
- Hey, mister, are you dead?
739
00:52:47,929 --> 00:52:50,989
It's a race.
It's a race. It's a race.
740
00:52:52,067 --> 00:52:55,468
Run, run,
like greased lightning.
741
00:52:56,271 --> 00:52:59,104
Taxi! Taxi! Taxi!
742
00:53:04,946 --> 00:53:07,210
Not good. Not good.
743
00:53:13,621 --> 00:53:16,215
Don't move! Stay there.
I saw the whole thing.
744
00:53:16,291 --> 00:53:17,553
I'll be right down.
745
00:53:17,625 --> 00:53:21,322
Shit! Gloria Allred.
746
00:53:21,396 --> 00:53:24,729
Hey, buddy?
Buddy, you okay? You okay?
747
00:53:24,799 --> 00:53:27,165
You're fine! You look great.
748
00:53:27,235 --> 00:53:29,226
- You want to report this?
- Taxi!
749
00:53:29,304 --> 00:53:31,272
You don't need a taxi.
Come on!
750
00:53:31,339 --> 00:53:33,330
Where you goin'?
Maybe I can drop you off.
751
00:53:33,408 --> 00:53:36,138
Silver City, New Mexico.
I am in a race.
752
00:53:36,211 --> 00:53:38,805
Silver City?
This is your lucky day!
753
00:53:38,880 --> 00:53:41,849
I'm going to El Paso.
It's right on the way.
754
00:53:41,916 --> 00:53:45,750
Come on. But, look, I got
to be there by 7:00 tonight.
755
00:53:45,820 --> 00:53:48,846
- So I'm going to be driving fast.
- Great.
756
00:53:48,923 --> 00:53:49,855
Yeah!
757
00:53:51,292 --> 00:53:55,092
You just want one copy, 'cause
you get an extra one for half price?
758
00:53:55,163 --> 00:53:57,495
Just one and hurry.
759
00:53:57,565 --> 00:53:59,499
This is the best idea
you ever had.
760
00:53:59,567 --> 00:54:02,092
We split up. We take two keys.
We double our chances of winning.
761
00:54:02,170 --> 00:54:03,330
It can't fail.
762
00:54:03,404 --> 00:54:06,862
- You remember where we're goin'?
- Silver City, New Mexico.
763
00:54:06,941 --> 00:54:09,603
Right. Train station, locker 001.
764
00:54:09,677 --> 00:54:11,668
"Ero, ero," one.
765
00:54:11,746 --> 00:54:14,306
Rule number one: Discretion.
Don't talk to anybody.
766
00:54:14,382 --> 00:54:16,407
- I won't. I "romise."
- I'm serious.
767
00:54:16,484 --> 00:54:19,214
We're talking about
$2 million in cash.
768
00:54:19,287 --> 00:54:22,620
People would just kill us
to get their hands on that key.
769
00:54:22,690 --> 00:54:25,750
I love you.
770
00:54:26,728 --> 00:54:28,662
All right, little brother,
you steal a car.
771
00:54:28,730 --> 00:54:31,096
I'm gonna try to steal
that Corvette right there.
772
00:54:31,166 --> 00:54:33,100
I don't care what you get
as long as it's fast.
773
00:54:33,168 --> 00:54:36,399
I'll meet you in Silver City.
Don't forget your key.
774
00:54:38,206 --> 00:54:41,539
That "other-ucking" bastard!
775
00:54:41,609 --> 00:54:44,601
I'll kill 'im! I'm gonna...
776
00:54:48,183 --> 00:54:49,616
There he is!
777
00:54:50,852 --> 00:54:53,616
Go! Go!
778
00:54:54,689 --> 00:54:57,249
Okay, we're at 2.4 miles.
779
00:54:57,325 --> 00:54:58,815
There's the yellow sign
with the graffiti.
780
00:54:58,893 --> 00:55:00,588
- Turn right.
- I see it.
781
00:55:00,662 --> 00:55:02,061
- Do you see it?
- I see it.
782
00:55:02,130 --> 00:55:05,156
I just love this.
This is like a treasure hunt.
783
00:55:07,702 --> 00:55:10,170
- Slow down!
- I can't!
784
00:55:14,642 --> 00:55:16,735
Help!
785
00:55:46,074 --> 00:55:50,443
I guess my favorite episode, if I
had to pick one, would be episode 34.
786
00:55:50,511 --> 00:55:53,776
Ladies, Lucys, Lucys,
stay behind the line, please.
787
00:55:53,848 --> 00:55:57,079
Remember that one when Ricky
wouldn't take his hat off?
788
00:55:57,151 --> 00:56:00,518
I don't remember that one.
It sounds like a masterpiece.
789
00:56:00,588 --> 00:56:03,386
How about the one where
she got caught in the freezer?
790
00:56:03,458 --> 00:56:07,519
Ma'am? Lucy! You have
to put that out, please.
791
00:56:17,105 --> 00:56:19,073
Lucy, your hair!
792
00:56:19,140 --> 00:56:23,440
Thank you. I couldn't decide whether
to keep it up or try something new.
793
00:56:23,511 --> 00:56:26,002
It's on fire!
794
00:56:33,855 --> 00:56:36,483
- Stop the bus!
- We're not stoppin'!
795
00:56:36,557 --> 00:56:39,185
Just put it out!
Just put it out!
796
00:56:39,260 --> 00:56:41,854
Stop!
797
00:56:42,463 --> 00:56:43,657
The bathroom!
798
00:57:13,194 --> 00:57:17,790
Two million dollars. Two million
dollars. Two million dollars.
799
00:57:17,865 --> 00:57:22,427
Two million dollars. Two million
dollars. Two million dollars.
800
00:57:22,503 --> 00:57:25,199
The Donald Sinclair,
the billionaire?
801
00:57:25,273 --> 00:57:28,470
It sounds crazy, I know,
but I think it's on the level.
802
00:57:28,543 --> 00:57:31,478
Here's the thing. We have
to decide yes or no right now.
803
00:57:31,546 --> 00:57:36,210
If everybody else had to drive,
we have a three-hour head start.
804
00:57:36,284 --> 00:57:40,118
- So you're proposing?
- A corporation... Faucet and Schaffer.
805
00:57:40,188 --> 00:57:44,124
If we win, we split everything
50-50. You can even hold the key.
806
00:57:45,460 --> 00:57:47,121
What do ya think?
807
00:57:48,329 --> 00:57:50,854
I don't know what to think.
I'm in shock.
808
00:57:50,932 --> 00:57:56,234
Three hours ago I was in the airport.
I had a job. I was reading a book.
809
00:57:56,304 --> 00:57:58,795
My grandfather used to say,
"Good things take time.
810
00:57:58,873 --> 00:58:01,467
Great things
happen all at once."
811
00:58:07,248 --> 00:58:11,878
- Jason, where'd you get that?
- I found it under the seat.
812
00:58:11,953 --> 00:58:16,151
- Give it to me. You can't play that.
- Why not?
813
00:58:16,224 --> 00:58:19,455
Because it's Hitler's harmonica.
You can't play Hitler's harmonica.
814
00:58:19,527 --> 00:58:23,930
- You're driving his car.
- I'm not touching it with my mouth.
815
00:58:23,998 --> 00:58:27,695
I'm not sucking on the dashboard.
I'm not gettin' his germs.
816
00:58:27,769 --> 00:58:29,794
Dad, look what I found.
817
00:58:29,871 --> 00:58:34,672
- Where'd you get those?
- The floor. Look, I'm Mrs. Hitler.
818
00:58:34,742 --> 00:58:36,801
All right, take those
off right now.
819
00:58:36,878 --> 00:58:39,813
Hey, look at this.
A lipstick. It's dark.
820
00:58:39,881 --> 00:58:41,872
That Eva Braun had style,
didn't she?
821
00:58:41,949 --> 00:58:44,679
- She was Hitler's girlfriend.
- Give us a kiss.
822
00:58:44,752 --> 00:58:47,687
Bev, it's not funny.
Give me that.
823
00:58:47,755 --> 00:58:49,848
- Honey!
- I got it all over my hand.
824
00:58:49,924 --> 00:58:50,891
Oh...
825
00:58:50,958 --> 00:58:52,289
Randy.
826
00:58:58,299 --> 00:59:00,563
- Chain, chain, chain
- R-E-S-P-E-C-T
827
00:59:00,635 --> 00:59:03,035
- Chain, chain, chain
- Find out what it means to me
828
00:59:03,104 --> 00:59:05,698
Respect
Just a little bit
829
00:59:05,773 --> 00:59:08,037
- Just a little bit
- Chain, chain, chain...
830
00:59:08,109 --> 00:59:09,542
Just...
831
00:59:11,479 --> 00:59:14,642
Look at us go.
We are zooming.
832
00:59:14,715 --> 00:59:16,910
I told you.
We're haulin' ass.
833
00:59:16,984 --> 00:59:20,818
We're haulin' ass.
All righty.
834
00:59:24,292 --> 00:59:27,955
- Guess what I got back there.
- You just told me.
835
00:59:28,029 --> 00:59:30,327
Ass. We're haulin' ass.
836
00:59:30,398 --> 00:59:33,026
No, no, no.
That's just an expression.
837
00:59:36,904 --> 00:59:38,166
It's a heart.
838
00:59:39,473 --> 00:59:43,273
- A heart?
- A human heart.
839
00:59:44,278 --> 00:59:47,441
Some lucky bastard
in El Paso's waiting for it.
840
00:59:48,149 --> 00:59:52,950
Normally, they put it on a plane,
but the airport's all closed down.
841
00:59:57,291 --> 01:00:00,692
- You wanna see it?
- See what?
842
01:00:10,104 --> 01:00:12,072
Are we allowed?
843
01:00:12,139 --> 01:00:15,802
Just take a peek. One peek.
What could happen?
844
01:00:17,645 --> 01:00:20,580
It's a heart.
It needs fresh air.
845
01:00:20,648 --> 01:00:23,617
It's been locked up
in that cooler for seven hours.
846
01:00:59,553 --> 01:01:02,351
- Oopsy-daisy. I get it. I get it.
- Shit! Oh, please!
847
01:01:02,423 --> 01:01:04,914
- Don't step on it!
- I think I found it.
848
01:01:04,992 --> 01:01:06,926
No, that's a caramel apple.
849
01:01:19,407 --> 01:01:21,773
This is wrong.
This is so wrong.
850
01:01:21,842 --> 01:01:24,834
God is gonna smote us.
We're gonna get smote.
851
01:01:24,912 --> 01:01:27,642
Come on. We're siphoning gas.
It's not a smoting offense.
852
01:01:27,715 --> 01:01:29,649
What?
853
01:01:36,190 --> 01:01:38,181
Shouldn't be
turning me on, should it?
854
01:01:42,663 --> 01:01:44,324
- Hey!
- Hi.
855
01:01:44,398 --> 01:01:48,232
- What are you doing?
- Seventeen cups of coffee.
856
01:01:52,873 --> 01:01:54,966
I guess...
857
01:01:55,042 --> 01:01:56,976
I guess that's it.
858
01:01:59,013 --> 01:02:02,346
I guess not.
How do you turn this thing off?
859
01:02:02,950 --> 01:02:04,577
Son of a bitch!
860
01:02:12,093 --> 01:02:16,189
- Man! Damn it!
- Keep going. Go! Go!
861
01:02:18,766 --> 01:02:20,700
He's stopping.
862
01:02:20,768 --> 01:02:22,759
'Cause he knows,
don't mess with us.
863
01:02:42,757 --> 01:02:44,691
We gotta wait.
There's too much wind.
864
01:02:44,759 --> 01:02:49,355
- Guys, I need this balloon.
- Hey, what are you doing?
865
01:02:49,430 --> 01:02:51,364
Hey, man, what...
866
01:02:55,970 --> 01:02:58,063
- Hey, hey!
- I know what I'm doing!
867
01:03:02,510 --> 01:03:05,968
I'm coming to get you!
Get back here!
868
01:03:10,618 --> 01:03:14,554
I'll get him. I'm gonna get you,
stupid hardware guy!
869
01:03:19,560 --> 01:03:25,226
- Go! Go!
- Stand up. Grab the rope.
870
01:03:25,299 --> 01:03:28,791
I'm gonna get you!
Stand up. Ready? Grab it.
871
01:03:30,905 --> 01:03:32,839
Missed it.
872
01:03:32,907 --> 01:03:37,173
- Duane! Duane, stop the car!
- Hang on, buddy.
873
01:03:37,244 --> 01:03:39,269
Duane, please stop.
874
01:03:42,016 --> 01:03:45,179
I got it! I got it!
Just hang on.
875
01:03:52,993 --> 01:03:57,293
- Stop it! Blaine!
- My God! You're gonna kill me!
876
01:03:58,399 --> 01:04:00,333
The cows!
877
01:04:04,171 --> 01:04:05,502
Move!
878
01:04:09,844 --> 01:04:11,277
Watch out!
879
01:04:31,765 --> 01:04:32,891
Shit.
880
01:04:45,279 --> 01:04:47,406
Oh, God!
881
01:04:56,157 --> 01:04:59,058
Help!
882
01:05:03,631 --> 01:05:05,622
- Give me my key.
- What are you talking about?
883
01:05:05,699 --> 01:05:07,758
Give me back my key.
The key!
884
01:05:10,104 --> 01:05:12,197
Give me the key.
885
01:05:59,987 --> 01:06:03,821
Blaine! Blaine!
It's me.
886
01:06:15,002 --> 01:06:16,936
I got the key.
887
01:06:23,644 --> 01:06:25,236
How's it going, Captain?
888
01:06:25,312 --> 01:06:27,246
So far, so good.
889
01:06:27,314 --> 01:06:31,478
- How about a pit stop?
- Sorry. This is a one-way flight.
890
01:06:31,552 --> 01:06:33,486
There's a bathroom
in the back.
891
01:06:33,554 --> 01:06:36,580
The latch is broken.
Anybody could just come in.
892
01:06:36,657 --> 01:06:42,396
So what? You ain't got nothing
the other Lucys haven't seen already.
893
01:06:42,529 --> 01:06:43,461
Not necessarily.
894
01:06:43,730 --> 01:06:45,755
Please, would you
stop screaming?
895
01:06:46,600 --> 01:06:47,658
Damn!
896
01:06:51,571 --> 01:06:53,004
Help me!
897
01:06:53,073 --> 01:06:55,633
For God's sake, help me!
898
01:07:08,488 --> 01:07:10,683
Oh, shit.
899
01:07:16,363 --> 01:07:19,560
Owen!
Owen, what are you doing?
900
01:07:19,633 --> 01:07:21,567
It's a flat tire.
Please, stay on the bus.
901
01:07:21,635 --> 01:07:25,162
- Well, you're turning it the wrong way.
- I know what I'm doing.
902
01:07:25,238 --> 01:07:29,004
- Please, get on the bus. Wait!
- Maybe we should check the oil.
903
01:07:29,075 --> 01:07:33,034
I think you're supposed to change
the air in the tires every 12,000 miles.
904
01:07:33,113 --> 01:07:35,775
- I can fix it.
- Give me that!
905
01:07:37,417 --> 01:07:39,578
Wait! That's the spare!
906
01:07:48,662 --> 01:07:50,186
We'll still catch it.
907
01:08:16,223 --> 01:08:18,885
Turn it around.
Just turn it around.
908
01:08:18,959 --> 01:08:22,520
Please be careful.
Wait, wait, wait. What is that?
909
01:08:24,764 --> 01:08:27,858
- It's a nickel.
- Would you please put it in the bag?
910
01:08:45,452 --> 01:08:49,752
Why don't you check over there?
Maybe it bounced.
911
01:08:52,192 --> 01:08:56,356
- I'm a dead man.
- Don't worry. We will find the heart.
912
01:08:56,429 --> 01:09:00,490
I have lost my heart
many times before.
913
01:09:04,204 --> 01:09:06,138
I make a joke...
914
01:09:06,206 --> 01:09:10,233
to help you forget
how screwed you are.
915
01:09:10,310 --> 01:09:15,145
I don't think it got this far.
Let's check down by the road.
916
01:09:15,215 --> 01:09:17,342
Oh, hello. A doggy.
917
01:09:17,417 --> 01:09:19,749
Hello. Hello. Hello there.
918
01:09:19,819 --> 01:09:22,083
Isn't he a good doggy?
919
01:09:22,155 --> 01:09:24,749
Come on. Come on.
Fetch. Fetch it.
920
01:09:26,526 --> 01:09:29,495
Look at him go.
921
01:09:31,331 --> 01:09:33,993
- Here, boy!
- Doggy!
922
01:09:34,067 --> 01:09:35,500
Good boy!
923
01:09:40,473 --> 01:09:42,100
- It really is a beautiful car.
- Yeah.
924
01:09:42,175 --> 01:09:44,370
- Look at this mahogany.
- Gorgeous.
925
01:09:44,444 --> 01:09:47,538
You just don't see
that anymore, you know?
926
01:09:47,614 --> 01:09:50,708
- I wonder what this is.
- Careful. That's a cigarette lighter.
927
01:09:50,784 --> 01:09:52,718
- No, I don't think they had those then.
- Yes, they did.
928
01:09:53,520 --> 01:09:55,613
Oh, honey!
Did you burn yourself?
929
01:09:55,689 --> 01:09:57,816
- Yeah. Oh, God!
- Oh, I told you.
930
01:10:01,294 --> 01:10:03,285
Sorry.
931
01:10:03,363 --> 01:10:05,854
My husband,
he burned his finger, ma'am.
932
01:10:05,932 --> 01:10:09,663
- He was pulling, then he was waving...
- Bev, Bev, not helping.
933
01:10:10,870 --> 01:10:12,804
- Hi.
- Hi.
934
01:10:15,442 --> 01:10:18,570
I really like
your dike. Bike.
935
01:10:20,814 --> 01:10:21,746
It's nice.
936
01:10:26,886 --> 01:10:29,855
Cut 'em off!
Get in front!
937
01:10:30,624 --> 01:10:33,252
- Hey! What are you, nuts?
- Get down!
938
01:10:33,326 --> 01:10:35,419
Kids, stay down!
This thing won't go any faster!
939
01:10:35,495 --> 01:10:37,895
Stop it! The headlights!
The headlight!
940
01:10:37,964 --> 01:10:42,594
- Oh, my God!
- Are you insane? This is Hitler's car!
941
01:11:00,787 --> 01:11:04,086
Honey, go ask them for help.
Tell them everything that happened.
942
01:11:04,157 --> 01:11:06,557
And ask them
to call the police.
943
01:11:06,626 --> 01:11:08,560
And a tow truck.
944
01:11:52,839 --> 01:11:55,069
- Hello.
- Hello.
945
01:11:55,141 --> 01:11:57,632
- Are you Harold?
- Yes.
946
01:11:57,711 --> 01:12:00,179
I'm Vicky.
947
01:12:01,214 --> 01:12:03,239
Are you gonna
invite me in, Harry?
948
01:12:03,316 --> 01:12:05,409
Or would you rather
party out here in the hallway?
949
01:12:06,352 --> 01:12:07,512
Please. Come in.
950
01:12:11,691 --> 01:12:13,625
Not too shabby.
951
01:12:14,794 --> 01:12:17,490
- Where are you from, Harry?
- From here.
952
01:12:17,564 --> 01:12:21,159
- Las Vegas.
- A local boy makes good.
953
01:12:23,203 --> 01:12:27,003
So, Harry,
what can I do for you?
954
01:12:28,074 --> 01:12:30,304
Okay. Here's what I want.
955
01:12:31,544 --> 01:12:33,102
First we both get naked.
956
01:12:33,179 --> 01:12:37,616
- So far, so good.
- Only we're wearing sailor hats.
957
01:12:38,852 --> 01:12:39,876
And then...
958
01:12:40,954 --> 01:12:44,048
we get into a Jacuzzi...
959
01:12:44,124 --> 01:12:46,388
filled with Pepto-Bismol.
960
01:12:47,193 --> 01:12:48,125
And...
961
01:12:49,195 --> 01:12:51,629
I clip your toenails...
962
01:12:51,698 --> 01:12:53,893
and you shave my buttocks.
963
01:12:55,301 --> 01:12:57,235
Pardon me?
964
01:12:57,303 --> 01:13:01,205
Okay, naked,
Jacuzzi, Pepto-Bismol...
965
01:13:01,274 --> 01:13:04,243
toenails,
shave my buttocks.
966
01:13:04,310 --> 01:13:05,937
How much would that cost?
967
01:13:06,012 --> 01:13:09,504
Geez, honey,
you have quite an imagination.
968
01:13:10,450 --> 01:13:11,849
How much would it cost?
969
01:13:14,020 --> 01:13:16,511
Well, let's see.
970
01:13:16,589 --> 01:13:20,047
A party like that...
971
01:13:20,126 --> 01:13:22,060
three thousand dollars.
972
01:13:22,128 --> 01:13:25,825
Okay, 3,000.
Who has 3,000?
973
01:13:25,899 --> 01:13:27,924
Carlton had 2,800.
He's the closest.
974
01:13:48,488 --> 01:13:51,480
I think it's okay.
What do you think?
975
01:13:51,558 --> 01:13:54,857
What about those little holes?
976
01:13:54,928 --> 01:13:57,761
Are they bite marks?
977
01:13:57,831 --> 01:14:01,835
That's... That's how it was.
I'm... I'm pretty sure.
978
01:14:01,968 --> 01:14:03,799
What am I doing?
979
01:14:03,870 --> 01:14:06,304
I can't go
to El Paso with this.
980
01:14:06,372 --> 01:14:09,500
Look at it.
It's gonna leak like a sieve.
981
01:14:09,576 --> 01:14:12,511
The guy's gonna be alive
for like two minutes and then...
982
01:14:19,586 --> 01:14:22,919
- A drifter.
- A drifter?
983
01:14:23,857 --> 01:14:26,951
We... We find a drifter...
984
01:14:27,026 --> 01:14:28,994
kill him,
cut out his heart.
985
01:14:29,062 --> 01:14:31,792
Nobody's gonna miss him, right?
I mean, he's a drifter.
986
01:14:31,865 --> 01:14:33,924
He's an invisible man.
It's a perfect plan.
987
01:14:34,000 --> 01:14:36,935
Mr. Zack, now you are
giving me the freak-out.
988
01:14:38,538 --> 01:14:41,029
Where...
Where do I find a drifter?
989
01:14:47,080 --> 01:14:48,342
Enrico.
990
01:14:49,749 --> 01:14:53,446
- Where did you say you were from?
- Me? I am from Napoli.
991
01:14:54,854 --> 01:14:58,119
And your family,
they're back there?
992
01:14:58,191 --> 01:15:01,957
No. No, my papa, he is dead.
993
01:15:02,028 --> 01:15:06,931
And my mama. All gone.
994
01:15:07,000 --> 01:15:09,662
Any family? Kids?
995
01:15:12,338 --> 01:15:16,399
I am completely alone.
996
01:15:16,476 --> 01:15:18,842
Why...
997
01:15:18,912 --> 01:15:21,710
Why do you...
998
01:15:24,450 --> 01:15:27,283
Look, a drifter.
Let's kill him.
999
01:15:27,353 --> 01:15:29,287
Son of a...
Come back here!
1000
01:15:51,744 --> 01:15:55,043
Whatever. Listen, sugar.
You're not going anywhere today.
1001
01:15:55,114 --> 01:15:56,741
You got a crack
in your radiator.
1002
01:15:56,816 --> 01:15:59,410
That's this big tank
in front of this big engine.
1003
01:15:59,485 --> 01:16:02,511
- I know what a radiator is.
- Is there a place we can rent a car?
1004
01:16:02,588 --> 01:16:04,886
- Albuquerque.
- Okay, look.
1005
01:16:04,957 --> 01:16:06,925
We'll just have to patch it.
A quick fix.
1006
01:16:06,993 --> 01:16:10,895
- Patch it? Patch it with what?
- Sand and tire sealant.
1007
01:16:10,963 --> 01:16:14,660
You mix the two. It forms an
adhesive, lasting a couple of hours.
1008
01:16:14,734 --> 01:16:16,668
We only have about
30 miles to go?
1009
01:16:16,736 --> 01:16:19,671
Darlin',
we don't have any sand.
1010
01:16:19,739 --> 01:16:23,106
Hello!
We're in the desert!
1011
01:16:29,081 --> 01:16:31,174
We should've
bought a squirrel.
1012
01:16:38,491 --> 01:16:42,689
Mother of mercy!
Where'd you come from? Car trouble?
1013
01:16:42,762 --> 01:16:46,698
Here. Sit down.
You two look exhausted.
1014
01:16:46,766 --> 01:16:49,701
How long y'all been out there?
Here. Have something to drink.
1015
01:16:49,769 --> 01:16:52,294
Ladies and gentlemen,
members of the press...
1016
01:16:52,371 --> 01:16:56,569
- What's going on?
- Some rocket scientists from L. A...
1017
01:16:56,642 --> 01:16:59,167
they're trying to break
the land speed record.
1018
01:17:02,114 --> 01:17:05,811
A unique combination of automotive
and aerodynamic innovation.
1019
01:17:05,885 --> 01:17:08,149
The vehicle, which
we call Lightning II...
1020
01:17:08,220 --> 01:17:09,949
represents three years
of R & D...
1021
01:17:10,022 --> 01:17:13,389
which was conducted at the
California Institute of Technology.
1022
01:17:13,459 --> 01:17:18,419
The design team was led by Professor
Ken Freedman and Dr. Richard Kramer.
1023
01:17:18,497 --> 01:17:20,965
We believe
that, aerodynamically...
1024
01:17:21,033 --> 01:17:23,729
this is the most perfect
vehicle ever designed.
1025
01:17:23,803 --> 01:17:27,603
The entire vehicle weighs
less than 1,850 pounds.
1026
01:17:27,673 --> 01:17:30,403
The body is a one-piece
Kevlar composite.
1027
01:17:30,476 --> 01:17:32,603
The wheels are
solid billet aluminum...
1028
01:17:32,678 --> 01:17:36,341
and she's powered by twin
JE-79 turbo jet engines...
1029
01:17:36,415 --> 01:17:39,077
the same engines that are
in the F-4 Phantom jet.
1030
01:17:39,151 --> 01:17:41,085
Are there any questions?
1031
01:17:41,153 --> 01:17:43,587
Mr. Calvert, what is
the current land speed record?
1032
01:17:43,656 --> 01:17:45,681
That would be
742 miles per hour...
1033
01:17:45,758 --> 01:17:48,283
but we hope to have
a new record today.
1034
01:17:48,360 --> 01:17:51,818
- Anyone else?
- How do you start it?
1035
01:17:51,897 --> 01:17:53,990
Good question.
1036
01:17:54,066 --> 01:17:56,364
A green lever to the left of the
steering wheel in the cockpit...
1037
01:17:56,435 --> 01:17:59,529
engages the primary thruster,
igniting the JE...
1038
01:18:12,952 --> 01:18:14,886
740, 745...
1039
01:18:14,954 --> 01:18:16,979
- That's a record.
- They'll break the sound barrier.
1040
01:18:20,493 --> 01:18:23,826
Well, that's it. I still don't
think she's gonna hold.
1041
01:18:23,896 --> 01:18:27,024
- What do we owe you?
- Five hundred bucks.
1042
01:18:27,099 --> 01:18:30,466
- What?
- For two quarts of sealant?
1043
01:18:30,536 --> 01:18:33,562
No way.
That's 20 bucks tops.
1044
01:18:33,639 --> 01:18:36,472
Okay, here's 40 dollars.
That's double what it's worth, okay?
1045
01:18:36,542 --> 01:18:38,476
Come on, Nick. Let's go.
1046
01:18:40,045 --> 01:18:41,137
Hold it.
1047
01:18:43,482 --> 01:18:46,144
Another little tool
no mechanic should be without.
1048
01:18:47,720 --> 01:18:51,850
Fine. Here's your $500.
But you know what, Billy Ray?
1049
01:18:51,924 --> 01:18:53,858
What goes around,
comes around.
1050
01:18:53,926 --> 01:18:55,860
This is so unchristian.
1051
01:18:55,928 --> 01:18:57,691
Unchristian?
1052
01:18:58,798 --> 01:19:02,234
Well, if the good Lord don't
like the way I conduct business...
1053
01:19:02,301 --> 01:19:03,962
let him say something.
1054
01:19:04,036 --> 01:19:06,231
Let him give me a sign.
1055
01:19:06,305 --> 01:19:10,241
Oh, Lord, I'm here
and I'm listening!
1056
01:19:10,309 --> 01:19:12,334
Hello!
1057
01:19:17,483 --> 01:19:21,419
- Mach one!
- We did it! We did it!
1058
01:19:27,593 --> 01:19:30,528
Hey, everybody okay?
You all right? Yeah?
1059
01:19:30,596 --> 01:19:34,191
- Randy, you okay?
- There's no Ink Inc.
1060
01:19:34,266 --> 01:19:37,258
- What?
- There's no job.
1061
01:19:38,938 --> 01:19:41,202
It's a race. We're racing.
1062
01:19:41,273 --> 01:19:43,468
Donald Sinclair put
$2 million in a locker.
1063
01:19:43,542 --> 01:19:45,737
And I wanna get there first.
1064
01:19:45,811 --> 01:19:50,748
I do not want
to work at Home Depot!
1065
01:20:21,714 --> 01:20:23,978
Okay, people,
back on the bus.
1066
01:20:24,049 --> 01:20:26,176
George, don't eat that.
1067
01:20:26,252 --> 01:20:29,688
Get back on the bus!
Come on. Back on the bus.
1068
01:20:29,755 --> 01:20:31,689
Simon, put that down.
1069
01:20:31,757 --> 01:20:35,454
You too. Back on the bus.
Come on, everyone!
1070
01:20:35,527 --> 01:20:38,894
We don't wanna miss dinner.
It's macaroni night!
1071
01:20:42,434 --> 01:20:43,833
We came in
the rocket car.
1072
01:20:43,903 --> 01:20:48,363
Oh, a rocket car. Let's hear
all about that on the bus.
1073
01:20:48,440 --> 01:20:50,465
All right,
so we can still win...
1074
01:20:50,542 --> 01:20:53,534
but we have
to leave now, all right?
1075
01:20:53,612 --> 01:20:56,206
- So, come on.
- Dad.
1076
01:20:56,282 --> 01:20:58,477
It's been a living hell.
1077
01:20:58,550 --> 01:21:02,316
Bev, it's... it's $2 million.
1078
01:21:02,388 --> 01:21:05,619
That's a lifetime supply
of hummus.
1079
01:21:13,265 --> 01:21:16,200
Okay. Okay. Yeah.
1080
01:21:16,268 --> 01:21:19,169
I've been selfish.
I understand.
1081
01:21:19,238 --> 01:21:22,537
I'm sorry. Really.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
1082
01:21:22,608 --> 01:21:26,806
I'm sorry.
I almost got us killed.
1083
01:21:31,383 --> 01:21:33,374
God!
1084
01:21:41,560 --> 01:21:45,155
- Hi, everybody. Miss me?
- Hey!
1085
01:21:45,230 --> 01:21:48,825
To show there's no hard feelings,
chocolate shakes all around.
1086
01:21:48,901 --> 01:21:51,870
- Are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
1087
01:21:51,937 --> 01:21:54,997
I'm a little disappointed,
but I'm an adult.
1088
01:21:55,074 --> 01:21:57,634
So drink these up, and then
we'll return the Nazi-mobile.
1089
01:21:57,710 --> 01:22:01,373
We'll get that van fixed, go back
to Vegas and see David Copperfield!
1090
01:22:01,447 --> 01:22:05,440
Yea! Okay,
drink up, buddy!
1091
01:22:05,517 --> 01:22:07,246
Is it good?
1092
01:22:07,319 --> 01:22:09,253
Drink it up, honey.
1093
01:22:12,791 --> 01:22:15,351
Oh, don't feel bad.
1094
01:22:15,427 --> 01:22:17,952
- It's not your fault.
- We'll tell the company.
1095
01:22:18,030 --> 01:22:20,430
We won't let them
fire you.
1096
01:22:20,499 --> 01:22:22,967
- I'm no bus driver.
- Don't say that.
1097
01:22:23,035 --> 01:22:26,232
No. I'm not.
I'm not a bus driver.
1098
01:22:26,305 --> 01:22:29,103
Oh, you mustn't be
so hard on yourself.
1099
01:22:29,174 --> 01:22:32,541
Hey, everybody, who's
the world's greatest bus driver?
1100
01:22:39,718 --> 01:22:40,946
Listen. Listen. No, no!
1101
01:22:41,020 --> 01:22:45,116
No! No! Shut up, you crazy
Lucy bitches! Shut up!
1102
01:22:47,393 --> 01:22:50,157
I am not a bus driver!
1103
01:22:50,229 --> 01:22:54,325
I do not work for
the bus company! All right?
1104
01:22:54,400 --> 01:22:58,996
I needed a ride to New Mexico,
so I stole this uniform!
1105
01:22:59,071 --> 01:23:02,939
See this jacket?
This is not my jacket!
1106
01:23:03,008 --> 01:23:04,976
Remember Marty,
the bus driver?
1107
01:23:05,844 --> 01:23:09,211
This is his shirt!
I stole it!
1108
01:23:09,281 --> 01:23:11,681
And these pants, you think
I'd wear these pants?
1109
01:23:11,750 --> 01:23:14,184
These aren't my pants!
1110
01:23:14,253 --> 01:23:16,949
These are Marty's pants.
I stole them.
1111
01:23:20,059 --> 01:23:23,517
I am not a bus driver.
1112
01:23:26,098 --> 01:23:28,999
You're not
a real bus driver?
1113
01:23:29,068 --> 01:23:31,366
You lied to us!
1114
01:23:31,437 --> 01:23:33,962
He ruined
our whole vacation!
1115
01:23:44,083 --> 01:23:47,917
Here they come.
They're all within 50 miles.
1116
01:23:47,986 --> 01:23:50,648
It's the final lap.
Mr. Grisham.
1117
01:23:50,722 --> 01:23:53,850
Now, the airport's back on-line, so
I want you to take the Lear jet...
1118
01:23:53,926 --> 01:23:57,157
scoot on down to Silver City
and report from the finish line.
1119
01:23:57,229 --> 01:24:00,027
Yes, sir.
1120
01:24:00,099 --> 01:24:01,299
Yes!
1121
01:24:23,788 --> 01:24:25,722
Let's go back to Vegas.
1122
01:24:27,725 --> 01:24:30,717
Bev, Bev, wake...
Come on. Wake up. Wake up.
1123
01:24:30,795 --> 01:24:33,730
Bev, wake up. Wake up.
Third Reich's here. Come on.
1124
01:24:33,798 --> 01:24:35,732
Get down. You wanna
have a nice life.
1125
01:24:35,800 --> 01:24:39,236
Okay, okay. Think. Think.
SS in the parking lot.
1126
01:24:39,303 --> 01:24:41,237
Not good. Not good. Think.
1127
01:24:44,875 --> 01:24:45,933
Hi, honey.
1128
01:24:47,011 --> 01:24:48,945
- They gonna be all right?
- Yeah.
1129
01:24:49,013 --> 01:24:52,676
Friend, I don't
think there's room.
1130
01:24:54,318 --> 01:24:56,252
This one's little.
1131
01:24:57,988 --> 01:25:01,185
- There it is. There it is!
- Silver City. We're almost there.
1132
01:25:01,258 --> 01:25:03,590
Yeah! Go!
1133
01:26:31,682 --> 01:26:33,775
Where the fuck are we?
1134
01:27:40,484 --> 01:27:42,782
There were two guys
in there.
1135
01:27:42,853 --> 01:27:44,787
- Where'd they go?
- Hey!
1136
01:27:44,855 --> 01:27:46,447
Thanks for the truck, buddy!
1137
01:28:49,820 --> 01:28:52,015
- Yeah.
- Silver City.
1138
01:28:52,089 --> 01:28:54,182
Next stop, Silver City.
1139
01:28:54,258 --> 01:28:57,750
Silver City?
It is the finish line.
1140
01:28:57,828 --> 01:29:01,059
I made it. I made it!
1141
01:29:03,067 --> 01:29:07,163
The key.
Where is the key?
1142
01:29:10,808 --> 01:29:13,402
What have we... Where is
the key, my little baby?
1143
01:29:13,477 --> 01:29:16,412
- Excuse me.
- I think I am touching it.
1144
01:29:16,480 --> 01:29:20,439
- Get away from him.
- I can feel it. It's very small.
1145
01:29:20,517 --> 01:29:24,920
- I'm calling the conductor!
- I have it! I got it!
1146
01:29:24,989 --> 01:29:28,254
Wait! Wait!
Come back! Don't leave me!
1147
01:29:33,530 --> 01:29:36,124
Come on! Come on, baby!
1148
01:29:37,801 --> 01:29:39,496
Giddyap!
1149
01:29:43,607 --> 01:29:47,475
Come on, baby.
Just one more mile.
1150
01:29:47,544 --> 01:29:49,978
Just one mile.
Come on!
1151
01:29:51,181 --> 01:29:53,115
Randy?
1152
01:29:54,184 --> 01:29:56,345
Hey, honey,
how'd you sleep?
1153
01:30:04,294 --> 01:30:07,491
- Pass. Pass him.
- I can't. We're too big.
1154
01:30:07,564 --> 01:30:11,591
There's Silver City.
We're here. Move!
1155
01:30:14,171 --> 01:30:16,162
They stopped.
1156
01:30:19,076 --> 01:30:20,737
They're moving. Look.
1157
01:30:30,120 --> 01:30:32,054
Come on, Dad! Let's go!
1158
01:30:35,025 --> 01:30:36,083
I can smell it.
1159
01:30:36,160 --> 01:30:40,119
Daisy, Daisy
1160
01:30:40,197 --> 01:30:43,633
Give me your answer true
1161
01:30:43,701 --> 01:30:47,637
Daisy, Daisy
1162
01:30:55,045 --> 01:30:58,071
Hey! Hey!
Stop the bus! Stop the bus!
1163
01:30:58,148 --> 01:31:02,585
- We gotta get off!
- Ladies. You know the rules.
1164
01:31:02,653 --> 01:31:04,814
We're not crazy, lady.
1165
01:31:04,888 --> 01:31:06,788
We should've bought a squirrel.
We didn't buy a squirrel.
1166
01:31:06,857 --> 01:31:09,485
- That's why we took the rocket car.
- We can still win.
1167
01:31:09,560 --> 01:31:12,723
Open the door, or I'm gonna crush
you like a cockroach in the night.
1168
01:31:12,796 --> 01:31:15,287
Open the door!
Tell him! Tell him!
1169
01:31:15,365 --> 01:31:17,299
- Open the door.
- Thank you!
1170
01:31:46,163 --> 01:31:47,460
It's Pollini.
1171
01:31:47,531 --> 01:31:49,761
Enrico Pollini on a train.
1172
01:31:49,833 --> 01:31:53,929
- He just rolled into the station.
- Well, what do you know?
1173
01:31:54,004 --> 01:31:55,995
Rip Van Winkle
pulled it off.
1174
01:31:56,073 --> 01:31:58,132
You gotta love a long shot.
1175
01:32:22,633 --> 01:32:25,625
It's here. It's here.
1176
01:32:25,702 --> 01:32:28,603
- It's here.
- Here he comes.
1177
01:32:28,672 --> 01:32:31,072
- It's you.
- He's holding the key.
1178
01:32:33,143 --> 01:32:35,407
And he's going
to the locker.
1179
01:32:37,047 --> 01:32:40,608
Mr. Pollini, well done, sir.
And congratulations.
1180
01:32:40,684 --> 01:32:43,881
On behalf of Mr. Donald Sinclair,
the Venetian Hotel and Casino...
1181
01:32:49,993 --> 01:32:53,053
Mr. Grisham, is it over?
1182
01:32:59,903 --> 01:33:01,837
- Get out of the way!
- Open it!
1183
01:33:09,279 --> 01:33:11,213
He's sleeping.
1184
01:33:31,301 --> 01:33:33,235
Did I win?
1185
01:33:34,338 --> 01:33:36,431
Vicky.
You let go of this bag...
1186
01:33:36,506 --> 01:33:40,033
or I swear to God, I'll report
you to the escort service.
1187
01:33:40,110 --> 01:33:42,635
Mr. Grisham,
what's going on?
1188
01:33:42,713 --> 01:33:46,547
The hooker... The hooker...
The hooker is taking the money.
1189
01:33:46,617 --> 01:33:50,314
- What hooker?
- Vicky. From the hotel.
1190
01:33:50,387 --> 01:33:54,084
- Pepto-Bismol?
- I told you to wait in the car.
1191
01:33:54,157 --> 01:33:56,751
- What the hell is she doing there?
- I brought her.
1192
01:33:56,827 --> 01:34:00,422
I'm sorry, Mr. Sinclair.
She said she liked me.
1193
01:34:00,497 --> 01:34:04,058
I'm beginning to think she was
only interested in the money!
1194
01:34:08,739 --> 01:34:11,139
- Come with me.
- I'll drive.
1195
01:34:25,389 --> 01:34:28,517
So long, suckers!
1196
01:34:34,831 --> 01:34:37,823
- The bus! The bus.
- You wanna steal a bus?
1197
01:34:37,901 --> 01:34:41,166
- Yes, I do.
- My God, what have I done?
1198
01:34:43,006 --> 01:34:45,600
Help! Somebody help me!
1199
01:34:48,011 --> 01:34:49,945
This thing's got
a mind of its own.
1200
01:34:56,420 --> 01:34:58,888
- Finders keepers, pal.
- That's mine.
1201
01:34:58,956 --> 01:35:01,220
I see it!
I see it! Relax!
1202
01:35:14,137 --> 01:35:16,469
It means it's a scratch.
Nobody wins.
1203
01:35:16,540 --> 01:35:20,306
I'll tell you what it means.
We're going into extra innings.
1204
01:35:20,377 --> 01:35:23,403
Carla, call the airport. Tell them
to get my other Lear ready.
1205
01:35:23,480 --> 01:35:26,506
Gordon, stay here and watch the
board. Tell us where they're going.
1206
01:35:26,583 --> 01:35:30,542
Gentlemen, grab your drinks.
We're going to Silver City.
1207
01:35:40,964 --> 01:35:42,898
- Is that it?
- That's it.
1208
01:35:42,966 --> 01:35:45,196
Thank the pilot.
Tell him to level off.
1209
01:35:46,636 --> 01:35:48,399
Who had Mr. Kimiche?
1210
01:35:48,472 --> 01:35:50,841
- It was me.
- Well done!
1211
01:35:50,974 --> 01:35:53,841
- Congratulations.
- Very good.
1212
01:35:57,781 --> 01:35:58,713
Keep going!
1213
01:35:59,850 --> 01:36:01,841
Come on!
1214
01:36:01,918 --> 01:36:04,443
There it is.
It's coming down right there.
1215
01:36:20,837 --> 01:36:22,896
- Where is it?
- There it is.
1216
01:36:22,973 --> 01:36:24,770
Go!
1217
01:36:27,811 --> 01:36:31,269
- Get it! Get it!
- Grab that money!
1218
01:36:31,348 --> 01:36:33,349
Get it down!
1219
01:36:51,200 --> 01:36:53,498
Now, that is
one hell of an entrance.
1220
01:36:53,569 --> 01:36:55,400
It's Smash Mouth!
1221
01:36:56,505 --> 01:36:59,269
What's going on over here?
1222
01:36:59,341 --> 01:37:01,366
- What's this?
- Money.
1223
01:37:01,443 --> 01:37:03,604
Jesus, how much is this?
1224
01:37:03,679 --> 01:37:05,943
- Two million dollars.
- Two...
1225
01:37:06,014 --> 01:37:10,041
Two million...
Two million dollars, everybody!
1226
01:37:12,521 --> 01:37:14,682
Two million dollars!
1227
01:37:14,757 --> 01:37:17,692
On the bus,
we talked about it...
1228
01:37:17,760 --> 01:37:21,628
and we decide
to share all the money.
1229
01:37:22,631 --> 01:37:24,758
They're gonna share
all the money, everybody!
1230
01:37:26,135 --> 01:37:27,625
Oh, man!
1231
01:37:28,670 --> 01:37:30,331
Get these guys some jackets.
1232
01:37:30,406 --> 01:37:32,840
Get these jack...
Get these jackets over here.
1233
01:37:34,510 --> 01:37:37,707
So what's the story, man? Are you
guys some kind of organization?
1234
01:37:37,780 --> 01:37:41,648
- What's going on?
- No, no. We just met this morning.
1235
01:37:41,717 --> 01:37:44,686
They just met
this morning, everybody!
1236
01:37:44,753 --> 01:37:46,277
Oh, my God!
1237
01:37:46,355 --> 01:37:49,347
I almost didn't come along,
but then I met Tracy and...
1238
01:37:49,425 --> 01:37:51,484
Well, great things
happen all at once.
1239
01:37:51,560 --> 01:37:55,018
Oh, this is beautiful, baby.
This is beautiful.
1240
01:37:55,097 --> 01:37:57,395
Great things happen,
I don't know.
1241
01:37:58,534 --> 01:38:00,468
Feed the earth, baby.
Feed the earth.
1242
01:38:00,536 --> 01:38:04,563
We're gonna check the tote board
now and see where we're at. Okay?
1243
01:38:04,640 --> 01:38:08,132
Come on, baby.
Let it roll. Come on, baby.
1244
01:38:17,786 --> 01:38:19,151
You don't understand.
1245
01:38:24,460 --> 01:38:29,159
Excuse me.
We work for Feed the Earth.
1246
01:38:29,231 --> 01:38:31,062
These are some
of our children.
1247
01:38:36,305 --> 01:38:40,139
I don't know who you people are
or where you came from...
1248
01:38:40,209 --> 01:38:43,440
but God bless you.
1249
01:38:45,647 --> 01:38:46,579
Tonight...
1250
01:38:46,648 --> 01:38:49,208
you've given to these kids...
1251
01:38:49,284 --> 01:38:54,415
and their brothers and sisters
all over the world more than money.
1252
01:38:54,490 --> 01:38:57,254
You've given them back
their faith...
1253
01:38:57,326 --> 01:39:00,727
their faith
in the goodness of people.
1254
01:39:08,303 --> 01:39:13,536
She said, "You are just
like the 12 disciples."
1255
01:39:15,210 --> 01:39:16,802
Aw!
1256
01:39:20,215 --> 01:39:21,375
Aw!
1257
01:39:22,818 --> 01:39:24,479
Thank you.
1258
01:40:12,434 --> 01:40:14,368
Forget it.
1259
01:40:14,436 --> 01:40:17,269
All these other disciples can do
whatever they want with their share.
1260
01:40:17,339 --> 01:40:19,466
- But this money goes home with us.
- What?
1261
01:40:19,541 --> 01:40:22,874
- Period. End of story.
- Put the money in the bag, carrot.
1262
01:40:27,382 --> 01:40:30,374
You don't know me, man.
1263
01:40:30,452 --> 01:40:32,386
Come here.
1264
01:40:34,756 --> 01:40:36,690
It's you.
1265
01:40:38,727 --> 01:40:40,888
I'm so proud of you.
1266
01:40:40,963 --> 01:40:43,989
Giving away
all of your money?
1267
01:40:55,577 --> 01:40:56,976
Come on.
1268
01:41:05,687 --> 01:41:08,918
Mama is watching us
from heaven right now.
1269
01:41:11,426 --> 01:41:13,451
What would she do?
1270
01:41:17,299 --> 01:41:20,996
It's for starving
children, Duane.
1271
01:41:23,238 --> 01:41:25,172
Do it for Mom.
1272
01:41:50,165 --> 01:41:52,292
Excuse me,
ladies and gentlemen.
1273
01:41:52,367 --> 01:41:54,767
I'd like to introduce
the real star of tonight's show.
1274
01:41:54,836 --> 01:41:58,772
None of us would be here tonight
if it wasn't for this man.
1275
01:41:58,840 --> 01:42:02,276
He is the man with the plan,
Mr. Donald Sinclair.
1276
01:42:03,345 --> 01:42:04,277
What?
1277
01:42:04,346 --> 01:42:07,110
One of the wealthiest
men in the world!
1278
01:42:08,650 --> 01:42:11,778
- Mr. Donald Sinclair!
- You are the man.
1279
01:42:11,853 --> 01:42:15,414
Get a camera on him. There you go.
Nice shot. There he is.
1280
01:42:16,825 --> 01:42:20,056
These men, they didn't
have to be here tonight.
1281
01:42:20,128 --> 01:42:22,562
No, they could be off
kicking back in the Riviera...
1282
01:42:22,631 --> 01:42:26,123
or in Vegas blowing their money
on some meaningless idiotic bet.
1283
01:42:28,003 --> 01:42:29,937
They couldn't do that...
1284
01:42:30,005 --> 01:42:32,473
not when there were children
going to bed hungry every night.
1285
01:42:32,541 --> 01:42:35,408
Isn't that right, fellas?
1286
01:42:35,477 --> 01:42:37,411
Whatever.
1287
01:42:37,479 --> 01:42:40,107
Mr. Donald Sinclair
and his partners...
1288
01:42:40,182 --> 01:42:43,379
want you and the millions
of people watching at home...
1289
01:42:43,452 --> 01:42:46,421
to know they plan to match
whatever you raise tonight...
1290
01:42:46,488 --> 01:42:48,513
dollar for dollar!
1291
01:42:48,590 --> 01:42:50,319
- Dollar for dollar!
- Dollar for dollar!
1292
01:42:53,662 --> 01:42:55,323
A matching fund, everybody!
1293
01:42:55,397 --> 01:42:57,831
Let's hit the phones
out there and crank it up...
1294
01:42:57,899 --> 01:43:00,697
because we're gonna feed
the whole world tonight!
1295
01:43:02,070 --> 01:43:04,504
Somebody once told me
1296
01:43:04,573 --> 01:43:07,064
The world is gonna roll me
1297
01:43:07,142 --> 01:43:10,942
I ain't the sharpest
tool in the shed
1298
01:43:11,012 --> 01:43:13,446
And she was lookin'
kind of dumb
1299
01:43:13,515 --> 01:43:15,506
With a finger and a thumb
1300
01:43:15,584 --> 01:43:20,790
In the shape of an "L"
on her forehead
1301
01:43:20,923 --> 01:43:23,289
Well, the years start comin'
and they don't stop comin'
1302
01:43:23,359 --> 01:43:25,623
Fed to the rules and
I hit the ground runnin'
1303
01:43:25,694 --> 01:43:27,662
Didn't make sense
not to live for fun
1304
01:43:27,730 --> 01:43:30,198
Your brain gets smart
but your head gets dumb
1305
01:43:30,266 --> 01:43:31,699
So much to do, so much to see
1306
01:43:31,767 --> 01:43:34,463
So what's wrong with
takin' the back streets
1307
01:43:34,537 --> 01:43:36,402
You'll never know if you don't go
1308
01:43:36,472 --> 01:43:38,633
You'll never shine if you don't glow
1309
01:43:38,707 --> 01:43:41,369
Hey, now, you're an all-star
1310
01:43:41,443 --> 01:43:43,411
Get your game on, go play
1311
01:43:43,479 --> 01:43:48,314
Hey, now, you're a rock star
Get the show on, get paid
1312
01:43:48,384 --> 01:43:51,319
All that glitters is gold
1313
01:43:51,387 --> 01:43:55,414
Only shooting stars
break the mold
1314
01:43:56,959 --> 01:43:58,688
It's a cool place and
they say it gets colder
1315
01:43:58,761 --> 01:44:01,161
You're bundled up now
Wait till you get older
1316
01:44:01,230 --> 01:44:03,095
But the meteor men
beg to differ
1317
01:44:03,165 --> 01:44:04,928
Judgin' by the hole
in the satellite picture
1318
01:44:05,000 --> 01:44:07,195
The ice we skate
is gettin'pretty thin
1319
01:44:07,269 --> 01:44:09,669
The water's gettin' warm
so you might as well swim
1320
01:44:09,738 --> 01:44:12,036
My world's on fire
How about yours
1321
01:44:12,107 --> 01:44:15,008
That's the way I like it
and I'll never get bored
1322
01:44:15,077 --> 01:44:19,036
Hey, now, you're an all-star
Get your game on, go play
1323
01:44:19,114 --> 01:44:23,414
Hey, now, you're a rock star
Get the show on, get paid
1324
01:44:23,485 --> 01:44:26,716
All that glitters is gold
1325
01:44:26,789 --> 01:44:32,557
Only shooting stars
break the mold
1326
01:44:35,764 --> 01:44:38,130
Go to the moon
1327
01:44:39,301 --> 01:44:42,395
Go to the moon
1328
01:44:44,106 --> 01:44:46,768
Go to the moon
1329
01:44:46,842 --> 01:44:50,403
Oh, yeah, go to the moon
1330
01:44:50,479 --> 01:44:53,971
Hey, now, you're an all-star
Get your game on, go play
1331
01:44:54,049 --> 01:44:58,543
Hey, now, you're a rock star
Get the show on, get paid
1332
01:44:58,621 --> 01:45:01,920
All that glitters is gold
1333
01:45:01,991 --> 01:45:04,926
Only shooting stars
1334
01:45:04,994 --> 01:45:09,624
Somebody once asked could
I spare some change for gas
1335
01:45:09,698 --> 01:45:13,600
I need to get myself
away from this place
1336
01:45:13,669 --> 01:45:15,261
I said yep, what a concept
1337
01:45:15,337 --> 01:45:17,805
I could use
a little fuel myself
1338
01:45:17,873 --> 01:45:22,572
And we all could use
a little change
1339
01:45:22,645 --> 01:45:25,307
Well, the years start comin'
and they don't stop comin'
1340
01:45:25,381 --> 01:45:26,746
Fed to the rules and
I hit the ground runnin'
1341
01:45:26,815 --> 01:45:29,181
Didn't make sense
not to live for fun
1342
01:45:29,251 --> 01:45:31,515
Your brain gets smart
but your head gets dumb
1343
01:45:31,587 --> 01:45:33,521
So much to do
So much to see
1344
01:45:33,589 --> 01:45:35,750
So what's wrong with
takin' the back streets
1345
01:45:35,824 --> 01:45:37,257
You'll never know
if you don't go
1346
01:45:37,326 --> 01:45:39,954
You'll never shine
if you don't glow
1347
01:45:40,029 --> 01:45:43,760
Hey, now, you're an all-star
Get your game on, go play
1348
01:45:43,832 --> 01:45:48,701
Hey, now, you're a rock star
Get the show on, get paid
1349
01:45:48,771 --> 01:45:51,763
All that glitters is gold
1350
01:45:51,840 --> 01:45:56,971
Only shooting stars
break the mold
1351
01:45:57,046 --> 01:46:00,607
All that glitters is gold
1352
01:46:00,683 --> 01:46:07,612
Only shooting stars
break the mold
1353
01:46:09,058 --> 01:46:10,992
Thank you. Good night!
1354
01:52:05,058 --> 01:52:05,992
5@y3
1354
01:52:06,305 --> 01:52:12,828
Support us and become VIP member
to remove all ads from www.SubtitleDB.org
104778
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.