Original subtitles

Man on TV: There's somethin' desperately wrong

- with him and he needs... - He needs help.

Good luck to him, you know?

I mean, good luck to him and anyone that's helping him

because he's, I'm tellin' you.

Reporter: Neville bartos has been in hiding

since chopper shot and narrowly missed killing him

for the second time.

Man: See, that's a good bloody wound, that.

- Can you see it? - Course I can bloody see it!

I was hospitable. I let him in.

[I said hello. I was a friend.

And he did it again.

- He did it again. - That's right!

So, what have you got fo say fo people

who say, "he's a real bad piece of work.

"He's criminally insane"?

Who says that?

Reporter: Well, Neville bartos, for one.

Oh, that bloody sook? Is he still crying, is he?

You know, Neville shouldn't have stepped

into the criminal world unless he was prepared

fo put his whole bloody leg info it.

Look, the average man on the street

doesn't worry about chopper read.

The average man in the street,

he likes me, he couldn't care less about me.

What I do, he applauds.

You know, and now they're saying that the victims,

that the bloody proceeds of my book

should go fo these victims of crime.

Well, who are my victims?

- Victims of crime! - They're bloody drug dealers.

Can you believe it?

You want money to go lo drug dealers? Perish the thought!

I've got nothing on my conscience

for killing a few drug dealers.

You know, I mean, the drugs, as far as I'm concerned,

they completely ruined the criminal world,

and in my opinion they will probably ruin normal society.

That's right. That's what you said before.

Reporter: You seem fo have a hatred for humanity.

Well, I mean, humanity doesn't like me.

That's why we're sitting here now talkin'

I'm a bloody freak show. I'm a bloody freak show.

Hello! Hello! Waving at us!

He's waving at us!

The chopper, chopper. He's waving at us.

An average person watching this thinks I'm a bloody freak.

Reporter: What's your opinion?

I'm just a bloody normal bloke.

A normal bloke who likes a bit of torture.

Song: J oh, give me land, lots of land

> under starry skies above

> don't fence me in

> let me ride through

j» the wide open country that I love

> don't fence me in

j» let me be by myself in the evenin' breeze

> and listen to the murmur of the cottonwood trees

j» send me off forever, but I ask you, please

> don't fence me in

jd just turn me loose

> let me straddle my old saddle

> underneath western skies

> on my cayuse

> let me wander over yonder

d till I see the mountains rise

> I want to ride to the Ridge

> where the west commences

j» and gaze at the moon till I lose my senses

> and I can't look at hobbles

d> and I can't stand fences

> don't fence me in. J»

See that line there?

That's your side of the yard.

You stay that side of the yard, we'll stay this side.

Good. You got that, knucklehead?

What's he done to his hair?

That's boot Polish, mate.

He's developed a bit of a complex about it.

Poor old bugger.

Nice to see your bald patch's gone, Keith.

No, no, looks good, mate.

I like it.

So you're not gonna get me then, keithy?

You're not worth doin' any more time over, you maggot.

Oh, keithy, you'd get off on self-defence.

All's you've got to do is kill me,

present my psychiatric records to the court.

There's not a jury in the land that will convict you.

You're fuckin' sick, read. You're insane.

Beethoven had his critics too, Keith.

See if you can name three of them.

That's right. You can't.

Why don't you do yourself a favour and neck up, you cunt?

You're a parrot. Fucken' blowfly.

Oh, Keith, you know, I always thought I was a good bloke.

Ha! What did you ever do that was good?

Well, I bashed you.

That was good, wasn't it?

It was good for a bit of a giggle, anyway. Eh, keithy?

Oh, come on, Keith.

You should thank me.

You've got a head that needs regular panelbeating.

Oh, fuck him. Who does he think he is?

He knows who he is, mate.

He's keithy George, right?

He's... he's the painters and dockers, mate.

Out there he's a painters and dockers.

In here he's just another bare bum in the shower.

Why do you hate him so much?

I don't hate him. I don't hate anybody.

Well, why have we been fighting him

for three fuckin' years, then?

I don't know.

Well, mate, we should have a reason.

We'll make one up.

Step in.

Step in, Mark.

Fuckin' get that into yaaaa...

Cunt!

Sports commentator: It's a goal, kicked by Sheldon.

Shit! Fuck.

Mr Cole? Mr Cole?!

Cole: What the fuck's going on down there?

Prisoner: There's been an accident!

Keithy's done himself a mischief!

Cole: Rightio.

- Prisoner: Hurry up! - I'm comin' down in a minute.

Shit!

Are you alright, Keith? Eh?

It's alright, Keith.

You're not gonna bleed to death, mate.

Alright? They called the screws.

The screws are comin'.

Do you want a cigarette, Keith?

Keith: Get away from me.

It's alright, mate.

Have a cigarette, Keith.

Keithy, hey, come on, mate.

You don't much like me, do you, Keith?

You bash people for no reason, just to make your name.

You're a fuckin' idiot.

I'm not the dumb cunt what's pissing blood, Keith.

Right?

I'm the one who runs the division, mate.

Make no mistake about that, alright?

What's going on here?

Oh, no, she's sweet.

Oh, keithy seems to have done himself a mischief.

- Officer: Jesus. - Stay back, fellas. Step back.

Chopper: Are you alright, keithy?

Chopper: Off you go, mate.

Off to the sick bay.

Oh, whinge, whinge. Fuckin' whinge.

Be a nice late one tonight, sir.

I don't mind, Mark, I can tell you.

- Bit of overtime? - That'll do me, mate.

Enjoy.

Bloody put my shoulder out.

What?

Man: Mark, this is detective senior sergeant creswell

and detective sergeant Wyatt.

They're from the prison liaison office.

They're investigating the incident that happened

in h division yesterday involving prisoner George.

I must inform you that you're not obliged to say anything.

Anything you do say may be given in evidence.

Do you understand that?

Look, all I can tell you

is what I've already told mr beasley.

None of us saw anything. It was just one of those things.

Bluey Barnes was reading a magazine.

Ambrose atcheson was taking a piss.

Johnny price was washing his hands.

Jimmy loughnan was watching a bull ant crawl across the table.

And I was watching Jimmy watching the bull ant.

Sadly, none of us are going to be able

to help you on this occasion, much as we'd like to.

Well, I put it to you that that's not the truth.

Look, I didn't stab keithy George.

I had nothin' to do with what happened to keithy George.

Right?

And I'm sure when he wakes from his slumber,

he'll swear to god that I didn't stab him.

Well, he's not gonna wake up, Mark.

He died this morning.

Shit.

It's not a good thing.

The sort of thing that's gotta come back at you.

Don't get all spooky on me.

You dream about that shit for a while. Big deal.

You keep your feet on the ground.

It's not what he's talkin' about.

He's talkin' about the dockies.

They have to get us back now, don't they?

Hey! What did you want me to do about it, blue?

Just fuckin' lie there while he's stabbin' me to death, huh?

Let him stab me to death?

That would've been wise, wouldn't it?

Hey, we didn't want to start it up again!

That's the fuckin' whack!

That's the fuckin' whack!

Bluey!

Get fucked.

About bloody time, blue!

Don't get angry, blue.

You'll lose your edge. You'll lose your perspective.

You can't make friends with your enemies.

Even when peacetime is declared, no-one bloody...

You know, they're all still fuckin' enemies.

Aren't they?

Nothin's ever forgotten, blue.

It's just human bloody nature.

My money's always been on you, Mark, you know that.

But the dockies are very threatened

about what's happened to keithy George.

Very threatened.

You've really put them in a corner.

Now, I don't know how seriously to take this,

but there's a rumour going around

that they've put a contract out on you.

Fh? How much?

Apparently the hat's been passed around

and five of the dockies have put in two grand each

to have you knocked.

That's not bad.

I should have a go at it myself.

Oh, come on, it all sounds a little bit ridiculous.

I mean, who are they gonna get to do it?

Take your pick, Mark.

All's we gotta do is we grab two screws,

knives to their throats, take their keys,

march them up into the scullery.

Right? Lock them in the scullery.

Then get matchsticks, stick 'em in the keyholes

separating the gates from the division, right?

Then we ring the alarm bells,

we pick up the phone to governor beasley,

yeah, and we tell him we've got two screws hostage

and we've taken the entire division to siege.

Then we'll grab the keys,

we'll go through the whole joint, cell by cell,

and I will icepick the fuckin' spines

of every prisoner in this division,

make paraplegics of the lot of 'em.

Right.

Turn 'em all into jelly sandwiches.

Mate, I don't want to be in it.

- You're a fuckin' girl's dress. - I don't care what you say.

The blokes down here haven't got $10,000.

They haven't got 10,000 cents.

They haven't got any sense at all, mate.

Look, it's simple. We do it all in one night.

We go swoop, wake up in the morning, problem's solved.

I've got me appeal going, chop. I don't want to fuck it up.

You'll be in it, though, won't you, mate?

Do I have to remind you of certain things?

You're never gonna let me forget that fuckin' judge, are you?

No.

And as for you, you butt-ulcerated knucklehead,

when it starts, you jump straight in.

If you stand there thinkin' about it

for two fuckin' seconds, you are back there,

in the yard, crying, like when I first met you.

Right?

Yep.

- Yeah? - Yep.

- Jimmy: Want a smoke? - Chopper: Ta, Jimmy.

Bluey: Yeah, yeah, anyway, er,

yeah, he'd swallowed the thing, but it didn't come out

so he said to wait till the next morning.

So, I... l seen him, mate. I saw him in the dunny.

Chopper: Yeah?

Bluey: Oh, he was there with a toothpick,

trying to go at it, trying...

It's a bit early in the morning for kung fu, isn't it, Jim?

What's the matter with you?

Commentator: Has a good look at them.

Climbs the stairway fo take the starting gun...

One giving a little trouble.

Sun is shining brightly here at randwick.

And a good big crowd on hand...

Running for $100,000.

Just hang on a second.

What are you doin'?

What's got into you?

Hey, come here, mate.

Come here.

I'm sorry, chop.

Chopper: It's alright.

It's alright.

Ugh!

Shit!

Jimmy, if you keep stabbing me, you're gonna kill me. Right?

Let me go.

I'm not gonna let you go, Jimmy.

You've got a knife in your hand.

You let me go, I'll drop that shiv.

You drop the knife and then [I'll let you go.

Yeah, let me go, I'll drop the shiv.

I'll drop off. I'll drop off.

Let go of the knife, Jimmy.

Ok, I'll drop off, alright?

Let go... let go of me hands.

I'm gonna let you go. Ok?

You go and sit down.

Terrific sneak go, Jim.

Bloody terrific.

You obviously listened and learnt well, didn't you?

I always give credit where credit is due, Jimmy.

I give you top marks for treachery, mate.

Blue, you're bloody useless.

- You alright, chop? - Yeah, I'm alright.

Jimmy: Jesus, mate. Does it hurt?

Nup.

I think you'd better lie down, eh?

Chopper: What for?

It's not lookin' too good, mate.

Come on, let me help you.

You gotta lie down and lie still, eh?

Come on, just lie down.

I'm... I'm sorry, chop.

I'm sorry.

Jimmy: Cut me.

No, I can't fuckin' cut you, mate.

Bluey, cut me fuckin' arm!

- I can't cut you, mate. - Give me the...

- I can't do it. - Here, you piss-weak fuckin'...

Agh!

- Hey, put the knife down. - He's a mad cunt.

- Put the knife down, Jimmy. - He just fuckin' attacked me.

Ok, he attacked me first. Right?

- Put the knife down. - Oh, get him out of here first!

We're not getting anybody out till the knife's on the table.

- Put it on the table. - I've got no problem with that.

- Just get him out of here. - On the table, Jim!

Put it down!

Chopper went fuckin' mad!

He fuckin' tried to stab Jimmy!

He attacked him first!

He attacked me first, boss! Right?

How's about gettin' someone to have a look at me arm?!

Creswell: How are you, Mark?

Are you prepared to make a statement?

No.

Chopper: Oh, look, the bloke's been my best mate since 1975.

You know, we've had our fallouts from time to time.

It's no big deal.

You know, it's like if your mum stabbed you.

What do you do?

You don't get upset. You don't get angry.

You go, "shit. Mum's stabbed me.

"I better get off to the hospital."

Well, he's made a statement against you, Mark.

No, he hasn't.

Have a look at that.

That's not Jimmy.

- Jimmy wouldn't do that. “Wyatt: He's done it.

He's also filed a claim

with the victims of crime compensation board.

Victims of crime?

- How much can he get? - 5,000.

Jimmy loughnan?

A bloody victim of crime?

Shit. Cheeky dog.

Hey, so if he's charged,

does that mean I can lay a claim against him?

Jimmy!

Hey, Jimmy! Jimmy: Yeah.

Is that you, Jimmy?

Jimmy: Yeah.

Chopper: You weak cunt.

You could've had me,

but you lost your guts at the last second, didn't you?

I tell you, Jim, if I'd have had that knife,

you wouldn't have got a stab in the arm.

I'd have cut your fuckin' head off.

Mark, why are you getting up against Jim?

He's the one who made the first statement against me.

The cops were gonna charge me with attempted murder

because of a statement made

by Jimmy, mr 'my lips are sealed' loughnan.

The prick even filed

a bloody victims of crime compo claim against me.

Bluey: But he's the one who's been charged, Mark.

You can't stand up in court against him.

Who do you think I am, blue? The fuckin' red cross?

I'm not running some public charity here.

Bluey: Now, Mark, you know

I've always had a lot of time for you,

but Jimmy's the one who has been charged.

Now, I think the main thing, you know, Mark,

is that... is that Jim doesn't get any more jail out of this.

"Jimmy doesn't any get any jail out of this."

Well, he'd better get himself

a real fuckin' lawyer then, hadn't he?

Man: In the matter of the police

versus James Richard loughnan,

mr Newman is appearing for the prosecution.

The defendant is not represented.

Jimmy: Now, mr read, have you been searched

prior to your appearance in this courtroom today?

Yeah, by all and sundry. Everyone's had a go at it.

And why do you think that is, mr read?

Well, they searched everyone.

Especially you, mr loughnan.

I put it to you that the reason you were searched so thoroughly

is because you have a history

of violent behaviour in courtrooms.

Are you not currently serving a sentence

of 14-and-a-half years

for the attempted abduction of a judge?

That's 16-and-a-half years, Jimmy.

16-and-a-half years.

I'm told you used a shotgun in this attempted abduction.

Is that so?

Had it right here under my coat.

Oh, yeah? Nothin' down there now, I hope.

- Oh, I wish there was. - I bet you do.

Who would you use it on, hey?

- This judge? - No.

I'd use it on you at the moment.

Yeah, I bet you would.

You hold human life very cheap, don't you, mr read?

Some human life, yeah.

Oh, you have a lot of hostility towards me, don't you?

No. Perish the thought.

I even lent you that suit you're wearing in court today.

You lent him that suit? Yeah.

I realise it's not a fashion competition, your honour,

but if he'd have worn what he was gonna wear

you'd have given him 20 years for bad taste.

Alright.

I am a friend of yours, am I not?

It's been alleged you're a friend of mine.

And you are in fact serving a sentence of 17 years

because you tried to free me from jail.

Is that so? Yes.

And yet you've told the court that I attacked you

on the morning of August 20th.

Is that right? Yes.

Why would I attack you, mr read?

Who knows how your mind works, Jim.

So, all the people we've heard in court today -

some of them you consider to be your friends -

they're all telling lies?

Just a group of people

banding together to fight a common enemy.

Even your friends?

Oh, yeah.

Reporter: Armed police surrounded brunswick court today

auring a case involving

notorious prisoner Mark Brandon read.

Read was giving evidence at the committal proceedings

of fellow prisoner James Richard..

Check this out, blue, eh?

I'm the one on trial, he's the one all over the news.

Chopper: That's a nice little photo of you, Jimmy.

A nice little photo.

You are such a fuckin' show pony, aren't ya?

You could use that in your passport.

You fuckin' big-head wanker!

Keith was right about you, mate.

You bash people for no reason just to get a name for yourself.

Yeah? Well, one day they'll write a book about me, Jimmy.

And when you grow old and your grandkids ask you,

you know, what you used to do in your heyday?

You'll be able to say, with great pride,

that you couldn't kill Mark 'chopper' read.

And that'll be your claim to fame.

You fuckin' dog, read!

Yeah, he is a fuckin' dog, Jimmy!

Did you hear that, chopper?

You're dead now, mate.

You've got no friends left.

Do you think I fuckin' give a shit?

Fuck!

Now, if you could just see it in your hearts

to move me to sale, I'd be really appreciative.

Geelong's a dirty old hole.

Come on, Mark, you're classified as a maximum security prisoner.

You're in here convicted of a very serious offence.

Suppose a bribe's out of the question?

- Mark, this is not a joke. - I'm not joking.

I'll be getting 5-grand crimes compo

when Jimmy and I finish up at the supreme court.

Man: Look, Mark, a bribe is out of the question.

You're not going anywhere.

Yeah, but if I stay in here I'm dead.

Yeah, well, I'm sorry about that, but nothing can be done.

Mr beasley?

Mr beasley!

Righto. I'm out of h division today.

You're not going anywhere. Yeah?

Let's go!

Commentator: 26-25, the Maggies are in front.

29 minutes gone, second term.

Don't saw at it!

I'm trying to be gentle, mate.

You fucking idiot.

Rip into it! Slash it off!

Mark, what the fuck are you doing?

- Jimmy: Ohhh! - Oh, Jesus!

The other one.

Bluey: Oh, chopper! Fuckin'...

You're not gonna get me for this later, are you?

Just get on with it, ya fuckin' fairy! Rip into it!

- Eugh! - Oh, fuck, chopper!

Get a screw, would ya?

Bluey: You're fuckin' bleeding, chop!

Boss! He's bleeding.

Jimmy: You've got to stop the bleeding, ok?

Gonna need cold water.

Get yourself into the shower, alright?

You're talking to me now, are you? Hey?

After all I've done for you.

I took you from tears to fuckin' glory and you do this to me.

I'm not angry at you, Jim.

You just broke my heart, that's all.

Prisoner: What's going on? Hey, what's going on?

Prisoner 2: Chopper's cut his fuckin' ears off!

Wouldn't get out of h division, eh?

You practically ran down and carried me out.

- Haven't you? Look at you! - Get him out.

I told you I'd get out, didn't I?

Have a look who's fuckin' leaving, boss!

Get him out!

Prisoner: Hey, chopper! Can I have your sunglasses?

Chopper: It's no big deal, boss.

They can bloody sew them back on.

Song: 2» I will give you love

> love

2 yeah - d love

> love

j» love - d sweet love... jd

you're looking at me ears, aren't ya?

Well, you weren't thinking of me

when you did that, were you?

> I been tryin' to

j» get to you... j

I missed you, bub.

Woman: Did you?

> Why is love such a

> lousy game? J

look, I'm out of it now. Right?

I made it as a top street fighter.

I made it as a top crim.

I've got nothin' to prove any further. Right?

You've got to keep movin' forward,

otherwise you bloody perish.

There's no point goin' backwards.

You know, you've gotta keep movin' forward.

- Oh, yeah. Give me your arm. - What are you doin"?

J it's all I have to give... »

oh, not with that, bub.

- Come on. - Oh, fuckin' shut up!

Give me your arm.

You know I hate it like that.

It's just a bit of goey.

> Oh, baby

dilove.. J

oh, fuck!

Ohhh, are you alright?

Hello?

Are you there? Hang on, I'll check.

Oh. You've given up crime, eh?

Mark? Is that you?

Oh, dad, sorry. You were asleep.

Come in here, Mark.

No, you're right. You go back to sleep, dad.

No, come in here.

You haven't been out for 10 years. Where you been all day?

You're right, dad. You look tired.

- You go back to sleep, eh? - No. Get in here.

Get in here and talk to your old dad.

You've been away for 10 years.

I've been sittin' here waitin' all day.

Don't sit there. Sit over here. Sit over here in this chair.

I've been sittin' around all day waitin' for ya.

You want a drink? Yeah.

- Ta. - Good to have you home, son.

Well, cheers, big ears.

Ahhhh.

Nice shirt, son.

- What's wrong with it? - Nothin'.

It's good. I like it.

You like it?

Do they make 'em for men?

Come on, don't be a sook.

I wrote mum. Told her I was gettin' out.

Oh, yeah. Did you hear anything from her?

- No. - No. Of course you didn't.

Yeah.

I heard your mate Jimmy loughnan's at large.

Oh, that old Chestnut. Yeah.

He beat the charge.

I always told you, Mark, didn't I?

Your kindness would be the death of you.

Look, he's fucked, dad. He's a bloody chronic junkie.

Oh, yeah. Your mate.

Life got him back in the end.

It all bloody equals out. Yeah.

Equals out alright.

He stabs you in the guts and he gets off.

You do 10 years.

All equals out? Your mate, Jimmy.

Jimmy loughnan. Fuck.

No, bubby, you walk on the inside,

the gentleman walks on the outside.

- See, it's called etiquette. - Oh, yeah?

Haven't heard that one before.

It's from the days when they had horse-drawn carriages...

Man: Hey, baby! Hey!

And the mud used to splash up from the gutter.

If mud splashes up, I'm here to protect you.

Are you? Thanks, sweetheart.

Piss off! You're blocking the entrance.

Hey, chopper!

- Good to see you out, mate! - Good to see you, chopper.

Good to see you, mate. Looking great.

Keep it dark, fellas, will ya? “What?

It's just so good to see you out, mate, you know.

It's like I've got a fuckin' sign on me

with you guys carrying on.

- Sorry, mate. Just.. - Just fuckin' got out.

Don't make a big fuckin' deal.

We're just happy to see you out. Out and around.

Good to see me, is it? Huh?

Yeah.

- Youse have a good night. - Have... have a good night.

Oi.

Oil

g'day, chopper. I heard you were out.

Are you kidding me? What, you forgot?

No, no, you're fuckin' kidding me!

Fuck. Neville.

That's right, mate. You got it in one.

Neville fuckin' bartos.

You see? He did fuckin' remember.

Of course you did!

What was it, mate? What was it you forgot, hey?

How are you, nev? Are you good?

What do you reckon? Take a fuckin' look.

Huh? Have a fuckin' geez.

What do you think I'm good?

Of course I'm fuckin' good, yeah.

Listen, nev, about the leq.

I'm sorry, mate, you know? It bloody upsets me.

- It plays on my mind a bit. - No, no, no.

That's was 10 years ago, mate. It's water under the bridge.

Just forget about it, ok?

No, seriously. Forget about it, alright?

Because I've forgotten about it,

so don't worry about it, you know?

Plus I got crimes compo payout. Pension as well, eh?

Really? Big bloody payout, eh?

And not a drink in it for me?

Not even a fuckin' thank you card.

No, no. Now, you got me there. What are you drinking?

I'll get you a fuckin' bottle, alright? A fuckin' bottle.

Because what's mine is yours, ok?

Now, would your girl like a drink?

- Marsala and coke? - Marsala and coke.

Right, good choice.

Nick, I need some drinks over here, quick-sticks, alright?

A bottle of marsala and a bottle of coke. And for you?

- Beer. - Get us a couple of beers too.

Quick.

Song: J plane leaving soon for afar

j» but she don't know anyone... j

have a bloody look at him.

Putting on that limp, trying to get me to feel sorry for him.

He seemed alright. Seemed quite genuine.

Well, you would think he was genuine, wouldn't you,

the way he was staring into your eyes?

No, Mark.

J is this the way it's gonna be forever?

J is this the way it's gonna be forever? J

chopper: Fuckin' cripple.

Girlfriend: Don't worry about it, Mark.

Don't worry about him.

> Take a whole life's loneliness

> wrap it up in some... j»

he's done very bloody well for himself too, hasn't he?

Girlfriend: Mark, leave it alone.

> With all my love... j»

fuck, I'm gonna nip this in the bud.

Mark, Mark, don't...

Oh, fuck, Mark.

Listen, you're not still shitty with me about that leg, are you?

What?

You're... you're not still angry at me about the leg, are you?

No, forget about it.

'Cause I don't know if you remember, Neville,

but I had that bloody shotgun pointed at your head.

I reconsidered and dropped it down to your kneecap, remember?

Forget about it, alright?

Why the hell were you gettin' lippy with me with a shotgun?

- I had a bloody loaded shotgun. - The leg is ok.

Alright? I mean, fuck, look at me, mate!

Look at me! I'm flyin...

I'm fuckin' flying!

Now go back to your girl and relax, ok?

Forget the leg. I'll get you another drink, alright?

J» thinks of the things that they shared... »

song: >» whoa!

J bite!

> Whoa!

J bite!

Js release the bats, release the bats... j»

chop-chop! How are you doing?

> It doesn't hurt

j» a hundred fluttering in your skirt

j» don't tell me that it doesn't hurt

> my baby is alright... j

who was that?

He wanted a light.

> She doesn't mind a bit of dirt... j»

just leave it, bubby. Don't worry about it.

You look at me or you look straight ahead.

You don't make eye contact with anyone. Right?

What was that for?

- Come on, we're going. - No.

Fuck off, Mark!

Get your fuckin' jacket.

I'm not going anywhere!

Let go of me, Mark!

Shut the fuck up.

What are you fuckin' looking at, hopalong?

- Nothin', mate, nothin' at all. - You got a problem?

- You fuckin' cripple! - No problem between you and me.

Want to fuckin' finish it? Come on. Fuckin' finish it!

Yeah? Yeah?!

Want to fuckin' have a go?!

I'm sorry, bubby.

I get a bit bloody schizo or somethin', you know?

It's, like... it's not easy, you know?

I go out, everyone's starin' at me ears,

they're starin' at my tatts, you know?

I done some mad things, bub, you know?

Fuckin' done some mad things.

And now I've got a bloody team of enemies, you know?

You should lay off the speed.

I'm trying to think of the last time

I actually took some time to be normal, you know?

Like, stood there and looked at a bloody sunset

or, you know, go to a bloody bar.

I can't go to a bar, right, and have a relaxed bloody beer.

I can't go to a restaurant and have a relaxed bloody meal.

I've got to sit there with my back against the wall

in case someone comes in.

You know, it's like my luck can't bloody last forever.

Bub...

I'll get us some money together.

Alright?

I've got some money comin' in.

What say you and I, we go down to fuckin' tassie, right,

and we make our own bloody life together?

Aww.

No offence, but I think I'd rather

keep working at the brothel.

Oh, I can't stop working, bubby. I tried.

Oooh.

What's the matter, honey?

Who is he?

No, bubby.

Yeah.

It's that fuckin' Neville fuckin' bartos, isn't it?

Mark, you're not gonna start all this again, are you?

I'm fuckin' talkin' to you! Who is he?

Fuck! You're hurting me!

Oww!

Is it Neville bartos?

Let go! Let go of me, Mark!

Neville bartos.

Fuckin' let go of me!

Jesuys!

What is wrong with you?

I fuckin' knew it.

Just bloody tell me, right? Who are you fucking?

Mark...

Everyone.

I work in a fuckin' brothel.

That's not what I mean.

You fuckin' know what I mean. Who are you kissin'?

You.

See?

I'm kissing you.

You get away from me with that mouth.

It's touched a wog's cock.

Oh, you're fuckin' nice, aren't you?

You're fucked! You fat cunt!

Fuck it.

What do you want?

It's me. Mark.

I know who it is. What do you want?

Come on, bubby, just let us in, would you?

No, Mark. What do you want?

What do you want?

I'm sorry, bubby. I'm sorry.

Yeah, righto.

I don't want to see you, Mark.

I love you, bubby.

Oh. Pull the other fuckin' one.

I need to see you, Tanya.

No. I'm not letting you in.

You got that?

- Come on, Tanya. Come on. - No. Fuck it. No.

- We'll just talk. - No, I've heard it before.

- Yeah, alright. - Tan... Tanya!

Tan...

I'm goin', then.

I'm fuckin' goin'.

Fuck.

Fuck you...

You fuckin' slut!

Fuckin'...

- Shit! Oh, get out! Get out! - Who you bloody talking to?

Fuck.

Hello? Who's that? Is that you, Neville?

- Who's this? - You fuckin' tip rat.

Righto. Tanya, you're coming with me.

Tanya: Oh, piss off, Mark!

Mark, get out of my house. Mark, listen to me!

Mum, you stay out of it, right? I'm not gonna bloody hurt her.

- Mark! - See, you're scaring your mum.

Mark, stop.

Tanya, you... get here!

Get here!

Get here, Tanya!

- Why? - Don't, Mark!

- Why Neville?! Why nev? - Fuck off!

“Why Neville? Huh?

You've ruined everything!

Settle down, you fuckin'...

Oh! Oh, for god's sake, leave her alone!

Get out of here!

Have a look what you've done!

Have a look what you've gone and done!

Your mum's upset!

I'm a bloody disappointment to you, aren't I?

Man: What?

Well, you probably read all the newspaper stories about me

and you've heard the word on the street about me

and you've got a picture in your head

of what bloody chopper read's like.

And we're sittin' here at this bar all very nice and cosy

and I'm a bit of a bloody let-down to you.

What are you on about, Mark?

I feel like I should be doing more for you,

mr downie, to be honest.

You know, there's crims out there,

they're getting around like a bloody protected species.

You know? Why?

I mean, look,

I know you blokes don't mind turning the occasional blind eye

whilst I deal out my own bit of poetic justice, right?

Actually, Mark, that's not the way we operate.

I understand perfectly, mr downie.

There are certain things that you can't appear to condone.

Look, appearance has got nothing to do with it.

We don't condone them.

I understand, mr downie.

Neville: Yeah? Who is it?

Nick, go and see who it is.

Yeah, who is it, huh? Hey, who is it?

It's me.

What the fuck do you want, huh?

Look, is Neville home?

Hey, nev!

Hey, nev!

What the fuck do you want?

Look, nev, I just come over to apologise, mate.

How the fuck'd you find where I live?

Don't worry about it.

I'm a bit embarrassed about what happened the other night.

I just came over to bloody apologise and clear it up.

You mad bastard!

You've got a nerve coming around here.

No fuckin' about. This is a very good neighbourhood, mate.

Ok? No fuckin' around.

You understand?

Open the gates, nev. Come on.

I'm gonna let you in,

you're playing the game by my rules, right?

Yeah, it's your house, mate, you know? It's your house.

- Yeah, it's a lovely house too. - Full respect, mate. You know?

There'd better be respect, mate.

Total respect.

Neville: Hey is that back garage shut, Nick, or what?

- Nick: Yeah. - You sure?

- Yeah! - Rightio.

Neville: Check it out.

Chopper: You're bloody kidding me.

How well have I done, mate? Eh?

Who's the king, eh? Who's the king, huh?

- Very nice. - Hey, what are you doin', mate?

Throwing your cigarettes on the grass?

Nick, pick it up, will ya? Pick it up! Get it off!

- Alright! I didn't throw it! - Jesus!

What you guys doing, following me around like a bad smell?

It's like you wanna fuck me up the arse.

Go mix some fuckin' drinks or something, will you?

Get out of here! Fuck!

That explains your limp.

- Hey? - Can you dive in?

No, sorry. No grubs allowed.

Come have a look at my babies, will ya?

Are they beautiful or what, eh?

Whatever you do, don't use the name on those bowls, alright?

They're aliases.

What?

Don't look at me like that!

Some smart cunt comes here, looking to rip me off,

uses those names and those dogs will fuckin' eat them to pieces.

Here, check this out.

- Neville! - Eh?

Chopper: Are you bloody right?

I should report you to the fuckin' rspca, you idiot.

No, mate.

Nah, mate, they like it. No, they do.

My dogs do. Keeps them alert, eh?

Come on, let's see if those poo jabbers

have got the fuckin' drinks ready.

Hey, Nick? Yeah?

Neville's turning over a bit of this stuff, is he?

Yeah, mate, he's got

all the fuckin' speed in the western suburbs.

Really? Yeah.

He's doin' well then, isn't he?

Tell me. You reckon he'd wanna throw a bit of cash my way?

Yeah, mate, I don't think he'll go for that.

Well, fuck him. He'll have to go for it.

Hey, Neville?

Neville!

Nev!

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah?

Hey, nev. I hear you wanna give me a bit of money.

Where'd you hear that, mate?

It's just the mail.

I can collect it now if you like.

I think someone's pulling your leg, mate.

Someone's pulling your leg, Neville.

Someone will pull your other fuckin' leg in a minute.

Now, how much you wanna gimme?

Who do you think you're talking to, mate? Eh?

Who do you think you're talking to?

I'm Neville bartos. Remember that?

Or has your fuckin' memory lapsed, you fuckin' idiot?

What?

Who do you think you're talkin' to, mate?

Oh, sorry. Was I being rude?

Yes, mate, you were being very fuckin' rude,

you fuckin' dickhead.

You wanna make some money, you make it yourself.

Get him a drink, Nick. And behave. I said behave!

Fuckin' idiot! Do you believe that fuckin' cunt or what?

- Hey, neuville! - Chop, relax.

No, no. I'm only giving him a bloody rev-up.

Neville. I'm sorry, mate.

Where are ya?

Neville?

Bloody sorry, mate.

I've had a couple of drinks.

I get a bit bloody carried away.

I've just been out, you know? Fuck...

Sorry. I've had a bit of goey.

I don't know who you think you're talkin' to, mate,

but you're being very rude, do you understand?

Show me some respect, will you? Very, very rude!

- Robbo? - Very rude.

You know? I'm fucking embarrassed.

I'm fuckin' sorry. Nev, I'm sorry.

Alright, mate, apology accepted.

Now let it go, will you? Relax. Take it easy.

Fuck. I'm trying to relax over here.

But seriously, nev, like, how are you holding for cash?

I'm a bit bloody broke.

Listen, mate. What are you talkin' about?

Cash.

There's no cash here!

Here, there's no cash. Alright?

Cash, no. Robbo?

No cash.

I tell you what - you try getting

from where you're sitting to the front door.

'Cause I reckon I could shoot you

from where you're sitting to the front door.

Because that's about as long as you've got

to produce some money for me right now.

I'll give you 20 seconds to produce some cash,

else I'll fuckin' shoot ya.

- One, two, three, four... - I've got no cash, mate.

Jesus, you come in, I fuckin' give you drinks.

- What's the matter with you? - Sit the fuck down!

- 10, 11, 12... - Hey, hey, hey!

Showing some hospitality here, mate. What are you doin'?

- Stop with the fuckin' counting! - ..16, 17...

- 18, 19... - Take it easy, will ya?

Fuck!

God!

What the fuck are you doin', mate?

Jesus Christ, relax! He's not your enemy!

Well, he fuckin' is now, isn't he?

Nick: Get a rag! Get a fuckin' rag!

Forget the rag, boys. Get the fuckin' cash, would ya?

Bloody frozen!

How long's it gonna take to defrost that, you idiot?

Robbo: He's in a bad way, mate.

Chopper: What's the matter, Neville?

Burst your bloody appendix or something? You having a whinge?

Come on, chopper. We gotta get him to a hospital!

So you took him to the hospital?

No, I didn't take him to the bloody hospital.

Now, tell me this, right.

Why would I shoot a bloke - bang! -

and then put him in the bloody car

and whizz him off to the hospital at 100 miles an hour?

It defeats the purpose

of having shot him in the first place.

What's more, it's bloody insulting!

It's bloody insulting.

I mean, am I the only bloody standover man in the country

who provides a medical plan for some of these characters?

Do I look like Mark Brandon 'medicare' read or something?

Alright. Who's bloody driving?

Don't be such a bloody sook!

Such a big fuss over such a little hole.

I'll put one in the brain, then.

Mark! Man! Jesus Christ!

Chopper! Come on, mate. You don't do this to your mates!

You're a dead man, chopper.

You're walkin' around with one foot in the fuckin' grave!

Get in, you fuckin' golliwog.

Chopper: Hospital, driver.

Come on!

He says you took him to the hospital.

You've spoken to him, have you?

Downie: Well, it's just what he's been saying around town.

Look, you'd do well to have a good look at

the motives behind him saying that.

Why would he say it if it's not true?

I dunno. I'm not a bloody psychiatrist, am I?

Look, Mark, this is no fuckin' joke, right?

Now, we've heard... and I don't fuckin' appreciate this.

We've heard you've been running around town

telling all and sundry that you've got

some kind of umbrella arrangement with us,

that we've given you virtual carte blanche to commit crime.

No.

Mr downie, that's rubbish, right?

That's complete fuckin' bullshit.

Downie: Fuckin' oath it's bullshit.

Listen, you get these bloody speed freaks together, right?

They'll create all kinds of fanciful stories.

Downie: Oh, yeah?

The other fanciful story doing the rounds

is that they've put out a contract on you.

Oh. Fuckin' mafia. Wankers.

Who are they anyway? Bloody fruit shop owners?

They should stick to selling their bloody fruit and vegetable

and just fuckin' leave me alone.

Downie: You know, I'd be taking this seriously if I was you.

Oh, I'm takin' it seriously.

I'm bloody shakin' in my boots.

Now, apparently, they're gonna try and get you at bojangles.

Anastopoulos and bartos have gone to Sydney for the weekend,

so obviously they're not fuckin' around.

Chopper: You know what?

They should bloody stay in Sydney,

those fuckin' razzle-dazzle wankers.

It'd suit their style, you know?

The only time you ever see

a bloody Sydney criminal on the television

is when he's lying in the gutter dead, after being killed

by a bloody imported Melbourne hit man.

Downie: I really think you should be taking this seriously.

I'm taking it seriously. Trust me.

Downie: Jimmy loughnan's name's also been mentioned.

Jimmy loughnan?

Oh, he's a fuckin' couch potato.

Well, just what we heard.

Jimmy loughnan? Are you sure?

Nick: Get the fuck up now!

Come on, fuck ya! Jesus!

Oh, for fuck's sake! Put it away.

Put the fuckin' thing away, will you? Put it away!

Downie: Fuck you!

Put the fuckin' thing away!

Jesuys!

- You wanna have a look? - No. Fuck off.

Woman: Get the fucking door.

It's probably those weasels...

Man: You're already up.

Oh, get up and get the fuckin' door.

Fuck ya.

Fuck, you're lazy.

Man: Who is it?

- It's Mark. - Man: Mark who?

Chopper.

Man: What are you doing coming around here?

Look, Jim,

all those problems we've had,

they're all in the past.

And all these rumours that are flyin' around,

well, they're all bullshit.

I just wanna come in. I wanna be friends.

What rumours?

That I'm gonna clip ya.

Jimmy: I haven't heard that one.

Well, it's not true.

Look, just let us in, would ya?

Jimmy: Look, mate, I'm not letting ya in, right?

I've got kids here.

They're just little kids and they will be afraid

by seeing a man with no ears.

Right.

Jimmy: It's nothing personal.

No, it's no problem.

Woman: Who is it?

Chopper: Come on, Jim. Look, just let us in.

I'll come in and have a chat.

Come on, mate!

I don't bloody bite.

Alright.

Alright. Just... just hang on.

Get out the way.

Are you armed?

Of course I'm bloody armed.

I've got a bunch of peanuts tryin' to kill me.

Would I get around without my fuckin' guns?

Alright. Well, you throw 'em in.

You throw 'em all in or I'm not gonna let you in, alright?

Throw 'em in first. Ok?

Jimmy: You right?

A stick of gelignite. Very nice.

Is that it?

Chopper: No. One more.

Is that it? Yeah.

Pretty nice-looking... Ladies gun.

Oh! Beautiful.

Yeah, it's a girl's gun, but it does the job.

Mark, this is my fiancée, Mandy.

- Hello, Mandy. - G'day.

Fiancée, hey?

Jeez, mate, you'd better speed it up

and make an honest woman out of her quick.

The bun's nearly cooked. Look at that!

Mandy: Yeah, Jimmy.

Hello! Hello!

You've got your finger in your mouth there, little one!

Mandy: Sit over there.

I'll go make 'em a cup of tea, I suppose.

Girl: But we don't like king prawns.

Mandy: No, you don't like king prawns.

She doesn't like king prawns.

This is plush, mate, hey?

This is swank!

Who says crime doesn't pay?

Gee, this is a nice gun.

You've got yourself a family now, Jim. Eh?

Little girl. Hello! That's lovely, mate.

I don't reckon I could have a family, though.

They're the sort of thing that could be used against you,

if you know what I mean.

No, not like the way it sounded.

But you know what I mean. Are you right there, love?

She's... look out!

How come he hasn't got any ears?

How come I haven't got any ears?

You're a cheeky little girl, aren't ya? Eh?

Hey, Mandy, get shazzy off to bed now, ok?

Hey, wake up. Come on, twinkle toes.

- Up. Let's go. - Yeah, righto!

Jimmy: It's bedtime.

- I don't wanna go to bed! - Not you. Shazzy.

- It's shazzy's bedtime. - Oh, yeah.

- Put her to bed. - Righto.

- God. - Jimmy: Good on you, shazzy.

'Night, Shazza!

See you, shazzy!

Take mummy to bed!

Mandy: I'll just get you a nappy, darling.

Chopper: See ya, shazzy!

Night-night!

Ni-night!

Goodnight, uncle chop. Alright.

'Night, Shazza! Alright!

Jesus, Jim.

You really have landed on your your bloody knees, haven't you?

Mark, what are you doin' here, mate?

What? Can't I visit a mate?

You and I were very best of friends.

Jimmy...

I do have a couple of questions for you, though.

Yeah, I've got a couple of questions.

Now, the first question is...

Is there something you're supposed to be telling me?

No.

There's nothing you're supposed to be telling me?

No, mate.

Chopper: Everything that's happened in the past,

I'll wash it all away

so long as there's nothing I need to know now.

No.

You're not angry at me for anything?

Mate, no, I'm not angry with you.

It's all water under the bridge, mate.

No new water? No fresh buckets coming around since then?

No fresh buckets coming around, mate.

Ok. Good.

Now, the second question.

Are you employed at the moment? Are you gainfully employed?

Perish the thought.

How much you using?

Hmm, you know, I've got a handle on it. It's...

Fucking h division, mate.

The only thing you ever had a bloody handle on,

Jimmy loughnan, was the occasional knife handle

when things got a bit too much for you, eh?

Knife handle on the old chop-chop.

Jimmy, listen.

I'm gonna show you something.

Now, if this goes any further, my life's in danger

and you'll be the one who's getting killed, alright?

Now, have a look at this.

I need someone to help me working.

Guess who I'm working for now.

Bloody guess. Have a bloody guess.

Fuck, uh...

Wrong. Begins with 'c'.

Chopper: Amanda Duncan.

- Amanda Duncan? - Cops?

Yeah.

I got a fucking green light from 'em.

Have a look at this.

Dirty dick downie.

Yeah, he looks like a fucking accountant,

but he's a hard bastard.

Super Steve cooney. Look out, super Steve!

You heard about Neville bartos's burst appendix?

Yeah.

That was me and the raincoat men.

Downie was driving the fuckin' car!

And you drove him to the hospital?

No, I didn't drive him to the bloody hospital!

Do I look like Mother Teresa to you?

You know him, do you?

Who?

Fuckin' who! Neville!

What are you doin' standin' there, sticky nose?

- Eh? - Ifuckin' live here!

You shouldn't be talkin' about this stuff here!

We got kids here!

Oh, fuckin' go and do the dishes!

You fuckin' shut up!

Don't come back in here when we're talkin' business. Alright?

Mandy: Business, yeah.

I bet you've got a briefcase, have you?

So there's nothing you're supposed to be telling me, Jim?

No, mate.

Nothing about a contract that's out on me?

Mm-mm.

Mate, you must have two dozen contracts out on you.

Yeah, well, apparently Neville bartos and Nick anastopoulos

and the rest of the fairy godfathers

have put a contract out on me.

Look, mate, I don't know anything about it, right?

Really?

You see, I heard you're the one that's supposed to do it.

But I guess it's a case of first in best dressed, isn't it?

No.

No, Mark. No.

You're being fuckin' paranoid, right?

Yeah, well, just 'cause I'm being paranoid

doesn't mean people aren't trying to kill me, Jim.

Mark, I've got kids here, mate. I've got kids here. Ok?

Mandy: Jimmy really likes you! He speaks highly of you!

He wouldn't fucking try and knock you!

Fuckin' sure he fuckin' does.

- Well, fuckin' just shoot me! - Don't shoot him!

Put the gun away, chopper!

If you wanna shoot me, in front of my kids,

go on, then, I fuckin' dare ya!

- Don't, Jimmy! - Shoot me in front of my kids!

Go on, you fuckin' cunt!

Oh, I'm sorry, Jim.

Fuckin' idiot.

I didn't mean to bloody scare ya.

Mate, you've gotta relax a bit, you know?

You've gotta take it easy.

You've gotta fuckin'... Get out of town.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - You're jumpin' at shadows, eh?

Oh, yeah, whatever.

Look at you, though. Bloody hell.

You're goin' bad, Jim.

You've got bloody kids and everything.

For Christ's sake. Here.

Fix your house up.

Fix your bloody kids up. Get your life in order.

You can't live like this, it's bloody terrible. Take it.

Jim!

Mother's a drug addict, for fuck's sake.

That's not for drugs.

Oh, Jim, don't slam the fuckin' door.

The kids are asleep! Or they were.

Jesus. Who you ringin'?

Jimmy: Get dressed. We're goin' out.

Oh, going out? Where? We got no money.

Where we goin'?

Just get dressed. We're going out, ok?

Get me my gun. Get me my jacket. Quick.

Jesus. Where are we goin'?

Neville: It's 7:00. This better be fuckin' good.

Neville? Loughnan.

- Jimmy/! - Yeah, he's just been here.

- Has he? - Just left my place.

- Oh. Where's he fuckin' going? - He's gone to bojangles.

- Yeah, right. Ok. - Bojangles.

- Great! I'll get a jacket. - Right.

Fuck Neville bartos!

He couldn't have the fluff knocked off a bloody cappuccino.

He's saying that you're two-faced.

I'm not bloody two-faced.

Mate, the word is - and I'm hearing it everywhere -

that you're working for the cops.

Who says that?

Hey, I'm hearing it everywhere.

You've gotta look at the motives

behind the people saying this stuff.

I'm not well liked, LAN.

Do you realise it's the world's worst best-kept secret

that I'm giving you bloody information?

Downie: You think that's it's us

running around, telling people about this stuff?

I mean, that'd be sort of counterproductive.

I like a smiling face, mr downie,

and you know I like you,

but I'm an expert at playing mind games.

I'll set my little traps

and I'll find out where the leak is comin' from.

Chopper!

Hello, hello.

Good to see you, my friend. You want drink?

No, no. That's alright, mate. Thank you.

Let me buy you drink. I have plenty money.

I buy you two dozen beer, huh? Come on.

Later. Later. Alright?

- You won't forget? - Thanks.

You want drink, you come see me, ok?

Song: 2» I don't need your loving...

Chopper: Who's that?

Ian: Which one?

Chopper: That fuckin' wog character up at the bar.

Oh. That's just Sammy the turk.

Really?

> Oh, baby, no more... j

chopper: You wanna know if she's got friends.

Yes, women like me very much because I have a big dick.

What are you touching me for all the time?

You a bloody homosexual or something?

Why you scared? I don't touch you.

I'm not scared, just don't touch me, you bloody poofter.

Ok! Where's your car?

It's up there. “Which one?

Keep goin'. “Where?

Hey! Is that gun, uh?

Yeah, it's a gun. It's fuckin' pointed at you.

Now, whose team are you on?

What?

Whose... team... are you on?

Team? Footscray.

Fuckin' comedian too, are you?

Yeah. Funny.

Why'd you fuckin' bring me out here?

What?

No, no, chop, you bring me here, huh?

You're fuckin' good, aren't ya?

Yes, I'm good. I'm friend to you, yeah?

Yeah, you're a fuckin' friend, aren't ya,

bringing me here in the middle of the fuckin' night.

What for?

Hey!

What?

What's that mean?

Sammy: You want english?

Speak fuckin' english! It's Australia!

Fuck you then. That's english!

You alright?

Oh, fuck. Give us a look.

Oh, shit.

Are you alright?

Oh, fuck, I'm sorry, mate.

Jimmy! Jimmy!

Jimmy! Jimmy!

That fuckin' lunatic just shot a bloke.

He just shot him in the fuckin' eye!

Don't fuckin' call out me name! “Who's this bloke?

I don't know! Shut the fuck up, Marcus!

I never fuckin' liked you! Let me in the car!

Calm down! “Who's this bloke?

Let me get in.

- He shot him... - Calm down! Fuck!

Chopper: Now, this character, right,

he's following me around all night,

he's got his arm around me all night,

he's buyin' me drinks, buyin' me drinks, buyin' me drinks,

in my bloody company, right here, all frickin' night.

I didn't know him. I didn't know him from a bar of soap.

You know me, I don't go outta my way

to befriend our ethnic cousins.

He's turkish or something. I've got enough on my plate as is.

So, yeah. Go on.

He wants to sell me this gun.

Right? He says he's got all these guns in the car outside.

Well, I didn't have ten cents on me, right?

But I don't think he had a gun salesman's licence either.

I thought, "if he wants to sell me a gun,

"I'l relieve him of it."

So we go outside.

He's very keen to get me into this car park, mind you. Right?

So did you go outside with him?

Yeah. Uh...

So what happened was... We go out to the car park.

Now, bojangles has got two car parks. Right?

Um, I head to the main car park.

And he pulls me up and he says...

No, no, no. Chopper, this way.

This way. Over here. I park over here. On this side.

Plenty guns. Very good guns.

Chopper: I get a bit bloody suspicious,

because this car park,

it's not very well lit, it's pitch bloody black.

And I walk out there, I'm following him,

and he stops dead...

And he turns around...

And he's lookin' over my bloody shoulder.

This fuckin' prick is checking for bloody witnesses, right?

All of a sudden, he turns around and he says...

Wait. Wait, wait.

Chopper, you got gun? You got gun, huh?

Chopper: He's walking towards me. "You got gun? You got gun?"

I said...

Yeah, I've got a gun. “What sort?

Chopper: He says...

What sort? Huh? What sort? Show me, please.

Chopper: "Show me your fuckin' gun."

He's dying to see my bloody gun, right?

Now, I had the gun down the front of my pants, right?

So I've lifted up my bloody jacket.

I've looked down at my gun and this cheeky little fuckin' rat,

he's grabbed the gun as quick as lightning,

he's pulled it out and he's put it at my head

and he's gone click-click-click-click,

like this with the trigger.

But it's not goin' off.

It's a .32 automatic, right?

Now, as you fellas know,

unless you've got the hammer pulled back,

it's not gonna go off - it's inoperative.

You can pull the trigger all bloody day long,

it's not gonna go off, you know?

Yeah. Sure, sure. So...

Well, what happened then?

So he's got the gun at my head.

He's going click-click-click.

And I have got the .410 shotgun down the back of my pants.

So I pull it out.

Now, it's a tiny little bloody .410 shotgun.

He's goin' click-click-click.

I'm thinking to myself, "shit.

"It's only gonna take him a couple of seconds

"to work this thing out with the hammer."

So I've pulled out the bloody .410

and I just go fuckin' bang.

And that was it.

He just bloody fell over.

Mark, what game are you playing?

Is this another one of your little traps?

What do you mean?

Downie: I mean, are you testing us?

You wanna see if we're gonna go rushing off

to the homicide squad and dob you in?

What?

We know you didn't shoot the turk.

I just told you I shot the turk.

They picked up the bloke that did it.

What fuckin' bloke that did it? I did it.

No, homicide have picked up the guy. Right?

They've even got the murder weapon.

- What murder weapon? - A .410 shotgun.

Yeah. This bloody .410 shotgun.

Put it away, Mark. Just put the bloody thing away.

This thing, it's a .410. Fine, it's a .410.

There's a fuckin' million 410s out there.

That's not the .410 that did it.

You don't want this?

- It's a fuckin' murder weapon! - Put the gun away.

Take it down to bloody forensic!

How long have you been on the go, mate?

"On the go, mate?"

The only one person at this table on the go is you.

The fuckin' goey. Where's the crust, mate?

Look at it. You're off your dial.

I've never...

I don't think I've ever been as bloody insulted

as I am right now.

I'm sittin' here confessing to a fuckin' murder.

I've known you since I was a fuckin' pup, right?

And you've got the fuckin' audacity

to drag this cunt here...

Sort out your boy, will you?

And you look at me like I'm a fuckin' idiot.

Mate, you're a bullshit artist. Simple.

TV reporter: Homicide squad detectives...

I just saw on the TV a man was shot at bojangles.

I thought it was you.

Well, it couldn't be me, could it?

Else I wouldn't be bloody standing here.

No.

Used to be bloody chopper read.

Now I can't even get arrested in this fuckin' town.

Did you do that?

Uh, would I do a thing like that?

That's my boy.

One in the skull.

Fuck.

Chopper: It took those numbskulls two weeks

to finally get around to sorting the whole mess out

and arresting me.

Turns out Mandy carroll was there that night.

Followed me and Sammy out into the car park

and saw the whole thing.

What I seen when the man got shot

was, like, um... like a flash from the side of his face.

Like, um, yellow colours.

You know when you fire a gun and you see the flashes?

Did you see a gun in the turkish man's hands?

The turk was just standing.

He didn't have anything in his hands.

He didn't have a gun. Nothin'.

He was just copping it sweet.

"Copping it sweet."

Yeah.

She'd turned crown witness against me.

Claimed that I murdered the turk in cold blood.

But what was she doing,

eight months pregnant,

bloody stoned off her tits,

down at bojangles at 6:00 in the mornin'?

Jimmy and the boys will be in the car.

You help set up the big fella, it'll make you a star.

They said they had it farmed out. They had it ghosted.

But when I walked out the door, they just left me posted.

The game was for real, it was no lark.

But the twit took him out to the wrong car park.

"Silly boys!" That's all that chopper had to say.

And poor little Sammy got blown away.

The knuckleheads!

I could've shot 'em in both kneecaps

and finished a game of cards

before this crew of retards got their act together.

Look, I'd like to thank my legal team

for all their hard work.

Uh, my solicitor, mr pat hutton,

my barrister, mr Morris Jeffrey over here,

and queen's counsel mr Damien Collins.

It was their Sterling, bloody Sterling, legal work

that helped me beat the charge.

I'm just bloody rapt.

Alrighty?

I beat the murder blue on the grounds of self-defence

but I got five years for malicious wounding...

And other assorted scallywag behaviour.

Now, I don't want to put shit on myself, right?

But the shooting of Sammy the turk at bojangles nightclub

is the most shit-pot bloody non-event murder case

in Australian criminal history.

But for some reason, I get all these bloody letters

from all over the world

and photos where all these crackpots

have gone down and taken photos of themselves.

I've got a letter here

from the sheriff of sparkes county, Nevada,

wishing I was there.

And have a look.

For some reason, they go down and take photos.

Bloody south African backpackers,

bloody funny-lookin' homosexual...

How did he end up in there? Jesus.

Housewives,

these bloody nitwits, these young criminal wannabes,

spunky ladies with lingerie...

I mean, it's unbelievable.

I guess it's a case of the old chop-chop

doing his bit for tourism Victoria, you know?

Man: She's alright, chopper.

Yeah, she's behind the letter-writing protest

to the governor.

Isn't she, boss, eh?

Man: She'd be writing a few letters of protest

if I ever got my hands on her.

Oh, really, bucky?

Can I introduce you to a friend of mine?

This is bucky. Get the camera over to bucky.

Bucky, get over here.

Here he is, young bucky.

Show her your tattoo, buck. Hoick it up!

'King Kong'. Why's he got that?

Voila! Copycat!

Isn't that bloody pathetic?

If you wanna be like your uncle chop-chop,

get them bloody ears off, you fuck...

Oh, sorry! Get them bloody ears off. Eh?

Get outta here. They're interested in me.

Go on, piss off! Get out! Get out.

Get the bloody ca... hey, get... Don't worry about bucky!

Just get the camera over here.

What is this? Eh? I haven't got all day!

Continue. Roll along.

Ok, then.

So, how would you describe yourself now?

Just a bloke.

Just a good bloke down on his luck.

Well, you don't seem out of luck to me.

You've written a bestseller.

Yeah, I know.

And I can't even bloody spell!

What about those poor bloody academics,

those college graduates,

battling their guts out

to write some airy-fairy piece of exaggerated artwork

and there's a bloke sitting in a cell who can't spell

and he's written a bestseller!

It sold 250,000 copies

and it's still selling.

And he's writing another one!

And I can't even spell!

I'm semi-bloody-illiterate!

They must hate my guts, eh?

- So have you got all your stuff? - Reporter: Yeah.

Chopper: What do you reckon? We entering logie country or what?

Jana wendt, look out!

We can send you a rough cut before it goes to air.

Nah, that's alright.

Look, anything I'd say would just be bloody fiddling anyway.

I'm sure I'll be very happy with it.

I'm sure it'll be exactly what I want.

Reporter: Absolutely.

Chopper: Yeah? It'll be very good, won't it?

- Reporter: Yeah! - Eh? Yeah.

'Bye.

Bye-bye!

He is Australia's most feared criminal.

The self-styled crime commando

who terrorised, tortured and murdered

dozens of drug dealers and armed robbers

on the streets of Melbourne.

He is, of course, Mark Brandon 'chopper' read.

Chopper: Of course.

He is also a bestselling author.

And I can't even bloody spell!

Fo get this exclusive interview.

- Reporter: Mark read says... - Have a look.

He's committed 19 murders,

but he's only ever been charged with one,

and he was acquitted of that.

Nevertheless, he's spent much of his adult life behind bars,

the rest on the streel,

disposing of what he calls "human filth'

did you really cut people's toes off?

My word, yeah.

Used to hit 'em with the bolfcutters

and they'd come good every time.

They love it.

Reporter: They love it?

Chopper: Well, they don't like it.

I mean, they scream a lol, but I like it

yeah, I like cutting off their toes.

What did you like about it?

Oh, well, you know, the way they just... pop off.

You've got the money and you're going to kill them,

so when do these good manners kick in?

Oh, work it out!

Break the news to them that their number's up?

Well, you say, "look, you've given me your money,

"you've been a good sport.

"I do apologise but I am gonna have to kill you."

You really do all that stuff that they were...

What?

All that stuff you're saying on the telly.

Oh, yeah, well, look, you know - you know me.

Never let the truth get in the way of a good yarn.

You should come and have a look one day.

I fancy the 10 toes that I've got.

I'll keep them.

- You've got a nice foot. - Thanks.

Officer: Unbelievable.

Smiling your little pearly teeth at her.

She's lovin' it.

Prisoner: Oh, chop-chop, give us your autograph, son!

Renee brack with that report from pentridge.

And I get the feeling that's not the last

we'll be hearing from Mark...

Too bloody right! Too bloody right!

And I must point out

that chopper read was not paid for that interview.

This program does not pay criminals.

Bring it on! Give us more! Give us more!

Where you going? Where... Wh-wh-what's goin' on here?

Is that it?

- Is that it? - How much do you want, mate?

Jesus Christ, it's a television station.

They've gotta sell stuff.

Pretty good bloody publicity if you ask me. Eh?

What's that gotta be worth to me?

Worth anything, mate. Worth anything.

Who needs to be bloody paid when you get on prime...

That's bloody prime time, this time of the night.

I come across alright, didn't 1?

Both: Yeah.

I tell you what, I reckon I come across intelligent,

but... but tough.

Officer: Yeah. Yeah.

Oh, well.

Come on. We've got some work to do, mate.

You alright for ciggies, mate?

Yeah, no, I've got heaps, thanks, boss.

Sweet. Sure? Yeah.

Alright. Catch you later.

Gonna have to shut this door, Mark.

No, that's alright. I... l know.