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1
00:00:01,268 --> 00:00:04,418
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
2
00:00:19,419 --> 00:00:21,219
(SNICKERING)
3
00:00:33,467 --> 00:00:35,237
Hiya, wacky sports fans,
4
00:00:35,303 --> 00:00:39,243
Big Brick Crashman
here in sunny California
5
00:00:39,307 --> 00:00:41,507
for our annual
Mother's Day race.
6
00:00:41,575 --> 00:00:43,805
Bricky, baby,
you look so thin.
7
00:00:43,878 --> 00:00:46,278
-Here, you eat something.
-Mom!
8
00:00:46,346 --> 00:00:49,416
I need to announce the race.
9
00:00:49,483 --> 00:00:50,953
(ENGINES REVVING)
10
00:00:51,018 --> 00:00:54,088
Mrs. Pitstop, you must be
mighty proud of your girl.
11
00:00:54,155 --> 00:00:57,115
Racin' is not a suitable
profession for a true lady.
12
00:00:57,190 --> 00:00:59,530
Ma! Not now, okay?
13
00:00:59,593 --> 00:01:01,363
Mr. Crashman,
don't you believe
14
00:01:01,428 --> 00:01:03,098
children born with large heads
15
00:01:03,164 --> 00:01:05,534
should be a mite
more respectful of their mother's wishes?
16
00:01:05,599 --> 00:01:07,969
-Um...
-I sure do.
17
00:01:08,035 --> 00:01:10,565
Darlin', I still don't see
why you don't settle down
18
00:01:10,637 --> 00:01:12,137
and leave all this
for the boys.
19
00:01:12,206 --> 00:01:14,306
What are you?
A TV development executive?
20
00:01:14,374 --> 00:01:15,714
Ma, I like to race.
21
00:01:15,776 --> 00:01:17,246
It's giving you
stress lines, dear.
22
00:01:17,311 --> 00:01:19,851
It's not the racing
doing that.
23
00:01:19,914 --> 00:01:21,854
Hi, there,
America the beautiful,
24
00:01:21,916 --> 00:01:24,816
I'm Philomena Perfect,
ping, proud ma
25
00:01:24,885 --> 00:01:26,715
of my perfect little
Petey boy here.
26
00:01:26,787 --> 00:01:28,557
PETER: Mom, I can't drive
when you do that.
27
00:01:28,623 --> 00:01:30,593
PHILOMENA:
Your eyes are so big and blue when you're terrified.
28
00:01:30,657 --> 00:01:32,787
Oh, look, how nice
you made that last turn.
29
00:01:32,860 --> 00:01:35,460
I'm so proud.
Here, let's take a selfie.
30
00:01:35,529 --> 00:01:37,769
-Smile.
-(EXCLAIMS)
31
00:01:37,831 --> 00:01:39,631
BRICK: And here's I.Q. Ickly
32
00:01:39,701 --> 00:01:43,001
with his high-powered
tech-industry-entrepreneur mother, Suzie Q.
33
00:01:43,070 --> 00:01:45,610
Alas, my maternal unit
is too busy
34
00:01:45,672 --> 00:01:47,212
to attend the race today.
35
00:01:47,275 --> 00:01:50,135
But, I'm holographically here to support my prodigy progeny.
36
00:01:50,211 --> 00:01:52,851
BRICK: Next, The Gruesome Twosome with their mummy.
37
00:01:52,913 --> 00:01:54,753
Whoa! She really is a mummy.
38
00:01:54,815 --> 00:01:56,215
Well, what'd you expect?
39
00:01:56,284 --> 00:01:57,624
BRICK: And saving the worst for last...
40
00:01:57,684 --> 00:01:59,794
I must say, Mrs. Dastardly,
41
00:01:59,853 --> 00:02:02,123
there's quite
a family resemblance.
42
00:02:02,189 --> 00:02:04,289
-Really? I don't see it.
-(SCREAMS)
43
00:02:04,358 --> 00:02:07,558
Richard has always
taken after his father,
44
00:02:07,629 --> 00:02:11,799
who was also a disdainfully
dreary disappointment.
45
00:02:11,865 --> 00:02:14,225
Wasn't he, Kitty Bitty?
46
00:02:14,301 --> 00:02:15,871
(MEOWS)
47
00:02:15,936 --> 00:02:20,586
Razzle-frazzle,
razzle-frazzle.
48
00:02:22,576 --> 00:02:23,976
(TIRES SCREECHING)
49
00:02:24,044 --> 00:02:25,414
DASTARDLY: Out of my way,
you undersized urchin.
50
00:02:25,480 --> 00:02:27,980
Don't you have
some sort of trick or cheat
51
00:02:28,048 --> 00:02:30,878
to get that brainy brat
out of the boulevard?
52
00:02:30,951 --> 00:02:33,121
Mother, no! Don't press the...
53
00:02:33,186 --> 00:02:34,416
(MEOWS)
54
00:02:34,488 --> 00:02:36,518
MUTTLEY: Razzle-frazzle...
55
00:02:36,590 --> 00:02:39,860
(SNICKERS)
56
00:02:39,927 --> 00:02:41,057
(ENGINES ROARING)
57
00:02:41,128 --> 00:02:42,898
Penelope,
you're driving too fast.
58
00:02:42,963 --> 00:02:44,103
Well, sit up straight.
59
00:02:44,165 --> 00:02:45,365
Pull that hair
out of your face.
60
00:02:45,432 --> 00:02:47,332
And look out!
61
00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:48,470
I saw him, Mother.
62
00:02:48,535 --> 00:02:49,865
Isn't that against the rules?
63
00:02:49,937 --> 00:02:53,437
Rules? We don't need
no stinkin' rules.
64
00:02:53,507 --> 00:02:55,507
(ENGINE ROARS)
65
00:02:55,576 --> 00:02:58,006
PHILOMENA: Oh, darling,
why don't the other racers just let you win?
66
00:02:58,078 --> 00:03:00,278
Can't they see your
big, beautiful chin dimple?
67
00:03:00,348 --> 00:03:02,418
No, Mom, that would take
all the fun out of it.
68
00:03:02,482 --> 00:03:03,782
Low bridge!
69
00:03:03,851 --> 00:03:06,621
Oh, Mummy, it's so nice
catching up with you.
70
00:03:06,688 --> 00:03:09,958
Really, we should dig you up
more than once every century.
71
00:03:10,024 --> 00:03:15,024
Though all that beauty sleep
really shows.
72
00:03:15,363 --> 00:03:17,833
Hurry,
you flea-bitten flophound!
73
00:03:17,898 --> 00:03:19,498
This bodaciously
balanced boulder
74
00:03:19,567 --> 00:03:22,067
will start an
auspiciously-timed avalanche,
75
00:03:22,136 --> 00:03:25,936
causing those rapacious racers
to stop in their routes
76
00:03:26,006 --> 00:03:28,476
and mollify
my malicious matron.
77
00:03:28,542 --> 00:03:30,012
Assuming she is assuagable.
78
00:03:30,077 --> 00:03:31,677
Oh, that reminds me.
79
00:03:31,745 --> 00:03:33,505
Where is
my frustrating forebear?
80
00:03:33,581 --> 00:03:36,681
I'm right here,
my prevaricating progeny.
81
00:03:36,751 --> 00:03:40,021
If you want
a cheat done right, do it yourself.
82
00:03:40,087 --> 00:03:42,187
Isn't that right, Kitty Bitty?
83
00:03:42,255 --> 00:03:43,915
(SNICKERS)
84
00:03:43,991 --> 00:03:46,031
-(GRUNTS)
-Drat!
85
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-(MUTTLEY MUTTERING)
-Curses!
86
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I.Q.: C.A.R.,
analyze the route.
87
00:03:50,498 --> 00:03:52,798
C.A.R.:
(IN A JACK NICHOLSON VOICE)Don't look now, sweet knees,
88
00:03:52,867 --> 00:03:56,037
but there's some mighty big rocks headed our way.
89
00:03:56,103 --> 00:03:57,203
Why do you sound like that?
90
00:03:57,271 --> 00:03:59,011
I upgraded C.A.R.'s AI, dear.
91
00:03:59,073 --> 00:04:00,743
I liked her the way she was.
92
00:04:00,808 --> 00:04:02,138
This is better.
93
00:04:02,209 --> 00:04:03,709
What do you want, kid?
94
00:04:03,777 --> 00:04:05,707
Um, emergency
evasive thrusters.
95
00:04:05,780 --> 00:04:09,580
You can't handle emergency evasive thrusters!
96
00:04:09,650 --> 00:04:12,350
-(THUDS)
-(YELLS)
97
00:04:12,419 --> 00:04:14,759
Here's Johnny!
98
00:04:14,822 --> 00:04:16,462
I liked C.A.R. better
the old way.
99
00:04:16,524 --> 00:04:18,364
-SUZIE: This is better.
-(EXCLAIMING)
100
00:04:18,426 --> 00:04:22,756
Richard, you got in the way
of my avalanche.
101
00:04:22,830 --> 00:04:25,930
Can't you do anything right?
102
00:04:26,000 --> 00:04:29,270
You're building
a roadside food stand?
103
00:04:29,337 --> 00:04:32,637
Hmm, no. No, no, no, no,
Mummy, it's a trap.
104
00:04:32,707 --> 00:04:36,977
When the racers
stop for a snack, I pull this lever...
105
00:04:37,044 --> 00:04:40,284
MUTTLEY: Razzle, razzle.
(SCREAMS)
106
00:04:40,347 --> 00:04:41,317
(WATER SPLASHES)
107
00:04:41,382 --> 00:04:43,922
Those sponge-brained
spider monkeys
108
00:04:43,984 --> 00:04:47,024
will never get past
this pit stop!
109
00:04:47,087 --> 00:04:49,117
And speaking of pit stop,
here comes
110
00:04:49,190 --> 00:04:54,190
that simpering Southern belle.
Mother, hide.
111
00:04:54,729 --> 00:04:57,369
Oh, look, Mama,
a little old roadside stand.
112
00:04:57,431 --> 00:05:00,231
We're so far ahead,
we can stop for a bite.
113
00:05:00,301 --> 00:05:02,601
Don't eat too much.
You'll blow up like a balloon
114
00:05:02,670 --> 00:05:04,670
and you'll never find
a husband if you're gassy.
115
00:05:04,738 --> 00:05:06,538
-Ugh, Mother!
-It's true.
116
00:05:06,606 --> 00:05:08,536
Ask Annie Burpsbottom.
117
00:05:08,608 --> 00:05:10,408
(BELCHES)
118
00:05:10,478 --> 00:05:14,478
You want roadside food?
I am your dude.
119
00:05:14,549 --> 00:05:18,319
What will it be today,
stranger I have never met before?
120
00:05:18,386 --> 00:05:19,786
Oh, hello, there. Bonjour.
121
00:05:19,854 --> 00:05:22,164
I'd like a little old salad,
some turkey jerky...
122
00:05:22,223 --> 00:05:24,493
And a nice cool lemonade
for Mama.
123
00:05:24,558 --> 00:05:25,658
We are all out.
124
00:05:25,726 --> 00:05:27,756
May I suggest today's special?
125
00:05:27,828 --> 00:05:30,358
Lobster claw. (GRUNTS)
126
00:05:30,431 --> 00:05:32,031
Aw, I'm allergic to shellfish.
127
00:05:32,099 --> 00:05:35,099
-Thanks anyway.
-(GRUNTS)
128
00:05:35,169 --> 00:05:37,639
It looks like
you failed again.
129
00:05:37,705 --> 00:05:40,235
-Muttley,
you flea-bitten furball! -(MEOWS)
130
00:05:40,307 --> 00:05:42,177
-You must have broken my trap.
-Huh?
131
00:05:42,243 --> 00:05:43,983
MUTTLEY: Razzle-razzle...
132
00:05:44,044 --> 00:05:48,284
(GASPS) Drat! Drat! Drat!
133
00:05:48,349 --> 00:05:50,479
Really, dear,
I wish you'd slow down.
134
00:05:50,551 --> 00:05:52,391
Driving this fast
could be considered rude.
135
00:05:52,453 --> 00:05:54,893
Mama, if I slow down
I won't win the race!
136
00:05:54,955 --> 00:05:56,385
You're not gonna win
anyway, sweetie.
137
00:05:56,457 --> 00:05:58,227
Not against
my perfect little boy.
138
00:05:58,292 --> 00:06:00,962
-Gun it, baby.
-Yes, Mother.
139
00:06:01,028 --> 00:06:02,758
(GROANS)
140
00:06:02,829 --> 00:06:04,369
(BONES CREAK)
141
00:06:04,432 --> 00:06:07,972
Yes, Mummy. I'm going
as fast as I can, Mummy.
142
00:06:08,035 --> 00:06:10,965
(GROWLS)
143
00:06:11,038 --> 00:06:13,068
(TIRES SCREECHING)
144
00:06:13,140 --> 00:06:16,080
I thought I taught you
to cheat better than this.
145
00:06:16,143 --> 00:06:17,553
But, Mother, dear,
146
00:06:17,612 --> 00:06:20,882
this plan will surely work.
Ready, Muttley?
147
00:06:20,948 --> 00:06:22,648
Ignite the incendiaries.
148
00:06:22,716 --> 00:06:24,516
(SNICKERING)
149
00:06:28,188 --> 00:06:29,558
(LAUGHS) Blocked!
150
00:06:29,624 --> 00:06:32,164
The pass
is completely impassable.
151
00:06:32,226 --> 00:06:34,156
Victory is as good as mine.
152
00:06:34,228 --> 00:06:37,358
Don't you think this trap
would have worked better
153
00:06:37,431 --> 00:06:39,731
if you and that
micro-brained mutt
154
00:06:39,801 --> 00:06:43,271
had waited until you had
passed through the tunnel
155
00:06:43,337 --> 00:06:46,537
-before blocking it?
-What? Oh, drat!
156
00:06:46,606 --> 00:06:48,476
(TIRES SCREECHING)
157
00:06:48,543 --> 00:06:50,383
PENELOPE: Peter,
you cut me off!
158
00:06:50,444 --> 00:06:53,054
I cut you off?
You were driving like a maniac.
159
00:06:53,113 --> 00:06:54,453
A crazed pink maniac.
160
00:06:54,515 --> 00:06:58,515
Oh, you all are driving me
bats. See?
161
00:06:58,585 --> 00:07:00,515
Racers bad.
162
00:07:00,588 --> 00:07:03,518
If you would all just lose
like you're supposed to,
163
00:07:03,591 --> 00:07:05,461
I wouldn't be trapped
in here with you.
164
00:07:05,526 --> 00:07:07,156
May I remind you
this predicament
165
00:07:07,228 --> 00:07:09,058
is all your fault
in the first place.
166
00:07:09,129 --> 00:07:10,859
C.A.R.: You tell 'em, pilgrim.
167
00:07:10,931 --> 00:07:13,131
Will you stop
talking like that?
168
00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:18,010
(ALL SHOUTING)
169
00:07:18,072 --> 00:07:19,472
(GRUNTS)
170
00:07:19,539 --> 00:07:20,569
(ALL GASPING)
171
00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:22,680
(GASPS) Mummy?
172
00:07:22,743 --> 00:07:23,783
(GRUNTS)
173
00:07:23,844 --> 00:07:25,554
(ENGINES REVVING)
174
00:07:25,613 --> 00:07:27,423
Sorry, kids,
but we can't wait for you to work things out.
175
00:07:27,481 --> 00:07:29,621
See you
at the finish line, darlin'.
176
00:07:29,684 --> 00:07:33,624
If a mother wants a race done,
she needs to do it herself.
177
00:07:33,688 --> 00:07:36,188
-Right, Kitty Bitty?
-(SNICKERS)
178
00:07:36,257 --> 00:07:40,457
Mothers, start your engines.
179
00:07:42,863 --> 00:07:44,233
Wait a second.
What's going on?
180
00:07:44,298 --> 00:07:48,468
Our mothers are finishing
the race without us?
181
00:07:48,536 --> 00:07:51,036
(ALL LAUGHING AND CHEERING)
182
00:07:51,105 --> 00:07:52,235
(GRUNTS)
183
00:07:52,306 --> 00:07:55,906
Did not see this coming.
184
00:07:58,078 --> 00:08:00,108
As the racers approach
the finish line,
185
00:08:00,180 --> 00:08:02,350
it looks like
this race is gonna be...
186
00:08:02,417 --> 00:08:06,447
PHILOMENA: By Amelia
Earhart's bursting barnstorm bloomers, I'm gonna win!
187
00:08:06,519 --> 00:08:07,459
(WHOOPING)
188
00:08:07,521 --> 00:08:09,121
Not on your jalopy, Perfect!
189
00:08:09,190 --> 00:08:12,630
DELILAH:
Eat my dastardly dust, you malicious mummies!
190
00:08:12,693 --> 00:08:15,703
PETUNIA: I'm in it to win it.
Out of my way. Yee-haw!
191
00:08:15,763 --> 00:08:17,303
SUZIE: I'm actualizing my potential
192
00:08:17,364 --> 00:08:19,904
to beat you all down, old school.
193
00:08:19,967 --> 00:08:22,897
(MUMMY GROWLING)
194
00:08:22,970 --> 00:08:24,470
It's a photo finish.
195
00:08:24,538 --> 00:08:29,538
But who won?
Let's look at the videotape...
196
00:08:31,779 --> 00:08:35,019
Why, it's...
It's Petunia Pitstop.
197
00:08:35,082 --> 00:08:37,052
Winning by a hair. Literally.
198
00:08:37,117 --> 00:08:39,447
(AUDIENCE CHEERING)
199
00:08:39,519 --> 00:08:40,449
Boo-yeah!
200
00:08:40,521 --> 00:08:42,891
♪ Oh, yeah, get busy, I won
201
00:08:42,957 --> 00:08:44,727
♪ 'Cause I'm your mama I'm your mama
202
00:08:44,792 --> 00:08:49,792
♪ It's your mama 'Cause I'm your ma ♪
203
00:08:50,697 --> 00:08:52,197
(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)
204
00:08:52,266 --> 00:08:54,466
PETUNIA: Hey, remember us?
205
00:08:54,535 --> 00:08:56,765
Oh, hey, kids.
Good to see you.
206
00:08:56,837 --> 00:08:58,307
Did you have a nice day?
207
00:08:58,372 --> 00:09:00,112
I can't believe
you left us behind.
208
00:09:00,174 --> 00:09:01,744
We had to walk
all this way here.
209
00:09:01,809 --> 00:09:05,009
37 miles!
Look how small my legs are.
210
00:09:05,078 --> 00:09:06,648
Oh, my feet!
211
00:09:06,714 --> 00:09:08,484
You could at least
have come back for us, you know?
212
00:09:08,549 --> 00:09:11,349
Yes. (LAUGHS)
We could have.
213
00:09:11,418 --> 00:09:13,488
-What happened? -We finished the race.
214
00:09:13,554 --> 00:09:15,464
I have to admit, it was quite stimulating.
215
00:09:15,523 --> 00:09:18,293
I understand
why you love racing so much now, dear.
216
00:09:18,359 --> 00:09:20,699
You do? Oh, well, that's nice.
I guess.
217
00:09:20,761 --> 00:09:22,831
As a matter of fact,
we had such a good time
218
00:09:22,897 --> 00:09:26,197
that we're gonna
come back for this little old race every year.
219
00:09:26,266 --> 00:09:29,136
(ALL GROANING)
220
00:09:29,203 --> 00:09:31,673
(SNARLS)
221
00:09:31,738 --> 00:09:33,238
(SNICKERING)
222
00:09:33,288 --> 00:09:37,838
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