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1
00:00:02,603 --> 00:00:05,106
(Edie) SO I'M DRIVING MY CAR
THE OTHER NIGHT,
2
00:00:05,106 --> 00:00:07,108
AND WHAT DO YOU THINK HAPPENS?
3
00:00:07,108 --> 00:00:08,739
(tires screech, loud crash)
4
00:00:08,739 --> 00:00:12,043
I CRASHED INTO A UTILITY POLE.
5
00:00:12,043 --> 00:00:15,216
THEN, TO ADD INSULT
TO INJURY...
6
00:00:15,216 --> 00:00:18,489
(electricity crackles)
I WAS ELECTROCUTED.
7
00:00:18,489 --> 00:00:21,192
WHAT CAN I SAY?
8
00:00:21,192 --> 00:00:24,325
IT WAS ONE OF THOSE DAYS.
9
00:00:24,325 --> 00:00:27,358
ALL MY NEIGHBORS
HEARD IT HAPPEN,
10
00:00:27,358 --> 00:00:30,601
SO THEY QUICKLY LEFT
THEIR MICROWAVED BURRITOS...
11
00:00:30,601 --> 00:00:35,206
AND THEIR EXPENSIVE JARS
OF MOISTURIZER...
12
00:00:35,206 --> 00:00:39,810
AND THEIR RACY
PAY-PER-VIEW MOVIES...
13
00:00:39,810 --> 00:00:41,672
AND THEY HURRIED OUTSIDE,
14
00:00:41,672 --> 00:00:44,715
EXCITED TO SEE
WHAT ALL THE RUCKUS WAS ABOUT.
15
00:00:44,715 --> 00:00:48,119
BUT THEN,
WHEN THEY SAW IT WAS ME,
16
00:00:48,119 --> 00:00:51,122
THIS WEIRD THING HAPPENED.
17
00:00:51,122 --> 00:00:56,257
FOR A MOMENT,
NO ONE MOVED OR SAID ANYTHING.
18
00:00:56,257 --> 00:00:58,629
THEY JUST STARED.
19
00:00:58,629 --> 00:01:00,161
AND THEN...
20
00:01:00,161 --> 00:01:01,692
(whispers) OH, MY GOD.
21
00:01:01,692 --> 00:01:03,534
ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE.
(indistinct shouting)
22
00:01:03,534 --> 00:01:05,396
DOES ANYBODY KNOW C.P.R.?
23
00:01:05,396 --> 00:01:07,067
THERE'S BEEN AN ACCIDENT.
24
00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:09,400
EDIE!
25
00:01:09,400 --> 00:01:11,272
CAN YOU HEAR ME?
26
00:01:11,272 --> 00:01:14,845
YES, EVERYONE SUDDENLY
BECAME VERY CONCERNED,
27
00:01:14,845 --> 00:01:16,377
WHICH WAS TOUCHING,
28
00:01:16,377 --> 00:01:19,650
BUT ULTIMATELY POINTLESS.
29
00:01:21,212 --> 00:01:24,185
MOMENTS BEFORE THE AMBULANCE
FINALLY ARRIVED,
30
00:01:24,185 --> 00:01:26,757
I HEARD SOMEONE WHISPER...
31
00:01:26,757 --> 00:01:28,289
(whispers)
DON'T WORRY, EDIE.
32
00:01:28,289 --> 00:01:31,292
YOU'RE GONNA GET THROUGH THIS.
YOU'RE GONNA BE JUST FINE.
33
00:01:31,292 --> 00:01:35,226
SUSAN MAYER--WRONG AGAIN.
34
00:01:35,226 --> 00:01:38,699
TWO SECONDS LATER, IT HAPPENED.
35
00:01:38,699 --> 00:01:41,602
WITH ALL OF MY NEIGHBORS
SURROUNDING ME,
36
00:01:41,602 --> 00:01:44,575
I TOOK MY LAST BREATH.
37
00:01:44,575 --> 00:01:46,106
THE GOOD NEWS?
38
00:01:46,106 --> 00:01:48,339
I DIED JUST LIKE I LIVED--
39
00:01:48,339 --> 00:02:04,695
AS THE COMPLETE
AND UTTER CENTER OF ATTENTION.
40
00:02:04,695 --> 00:02:08,128
TWO DAYS AFTER I KICKED
THE PROVERBIAL BUCKET,
41
00:02:08,128 --> 00:02:12,163
MY HUSBAND ASKED MY NEIGHBORS
TO DO ME A FAVOR.
42
00:02:12,163 --> 00:02:14,465
YOU COULD TELL
FROM THE LOOKS ON THEIR FACES
43
00:02:14,465 --> 00:02:18,909
IT WASN'T SOMETHING
THEY... WANTED TO DO,
44
00:02:18,909 --> 00:02:22,513
BUT... THEY AGREED TO DO IT
ANYWAY.
45
00:02:22,513 --> 00:02:26,177
SO THE NEXT DAY,
THEY PILED INTO A CAR
46
00:02:26,177 --> 00:02:29,149
WITH TWO THERMOSES FILLED
WITH COFFEE,
47
00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:31,522
A BASKET FILLED
WITH BAKED GOODS
48
00:02:31,522 --> 00:02:36,156
AND AN URN THAT WAS FILLED
WITH... ME.
49
00:02:40,691 --> 00:02:43,494
I HATE
THAT WE HAVE TO DO THIS.
50
00:02:43,494 --> 00:02:47,368
SO YOU'VE SAID.
I MEAN, IT REALLY IS THE KIND
OF THING A RELATIVE SHOULD DO.
51
00:02:47,368 --> 00:02:50,841
MAYBE IT IS, BUT WE'RE
IN THE CAR, ON OUR WAY THERE,
52
00:02:50,841 --> 00:02:53,874
SO STOP YOUR BITCHING.
(sighs) WELL, CAN YOU
AT LEAST PUT THE RADIO ON?
53
00:02:53,874 --> 00:02:56,877
I WON'T FEEL LIKE BITCHING IF I
CAN SING ALONG TO SOMETHING.
54
00:02:56,877 --> 00:02:58,879
IF YOU START SINGING,
I'LL START BITCHING,
55
00:02:58,879 --> 00:03:01,552
AND YOU DON'T WANT THAT.
IT'S A 4-HOUR DRIVE.
56
00:03:01,552 --> 00:03:03,954
WE HAVE TO DO SOMETHING
TO PASS THE TIME.
57
00:03:03,954 --> 00:03:06,887
HERE'S A THOUGHT.
WHY DON'T WE TALK ABOUT EDIE?
58
00:03:06,887 --> 00:03:09,189
AND SAY WHAT?
59
00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:11,962
I DON'T KNOW, BUT SHE IS
THE REASON WE'RE ON THIS TRIP.
60
00:03:11,962 --> 00:03:14,425
UH, MAYBE WE COULD SHARE
MEMORIES OR TELL STORIES.
61
00:03:14,425 --> 00:03:16,867
MM. WHY DON'T YOU START
WITH THE TIME
62
00:03:16,867 --> 00:03:19,730
SHE TRIED TO STEAL
YOUR COMATOSE BOYFRIEND?
(snorts)
63
00:03:19,730 --> 00:03:21,732
THAT WAS FUN.
OKAY, I WAS THINKING
64
00:03:21,732 --> 00:03:24,235
OF STORIES THAT PUT EDIE
IN A POSITIVE LIGHT.
65
00:03:24,235 --> 00:03:27,608
AND AFTER THAT FIVE MINUTES
IS UP, THEN WHAT DO WE DO?
66
00:03:27,608 --> 00:03:30,741
THE WOMAN IS DEAD, PEOPLE.
LET'S HONOR HER MEMORY.
67
00:03:30,741 --> 00:03:34,445
WELL, I'M ALL FOR SAYING
A FEW NICE THINGS...
68
00:03:34,445 --> 00:03:36,847
(sighs) BUT YOU WERE
NEVER REALLY FRIENDS.
69
00:03:36,847 --> 00:03:40,251
YOU AND EDIE CLASHED
RIGHT FROM THE START.
70
00:03:40,251 --> 00:03:42,923
YEAH.
71
00:03:42,923 --> 00:03:46,557
THAT'S WHAT EVERYBODY THINKS.
72
00:03:46,557 --> 00:03:49,260
(Susan)
BUT THE THE FIRST TIME WE MET,
73
00:03:49,260 --> 00:03:52,963
IT SEEMED LIKE WE'D END UP
BEING THE BEST OF FRIENDS.
74
00:03:54,335 --> 00:03:55,936
(sighs)
75
00:04:01,372 --> 00:04:02,673
(pants)
76
00:04:02,673 --> 00:04:04,845
OH, THAT'S DISGUSTING.
77
00:04:04,845 --> 00:04:06,917
(mouth full) NO, IT'S OKAY.
78
00:04:06,917 --> 00:04:09,280
IT LANDED
ON THE DETERGENT BOX.
79
00:04:09,280 --> 00:04:10,551
HERE.
80
00:04:10,551 --> 00:04:11,982
YOU GO BUY YOURSELF
A FRESH DOUGHNUT
81
00:04:11,982 --> 00:04:14,385
OR BOOZE, CRACK,
WHATEVER EASES THE PAIN.
82
00:04:14,385 --> 00:04:15,956
JUST MOVE IT ALONG.
83
00:04:15,956 --> 00:04:19,990
UH, YOU THINK I'M HOMELESS.
OH, NO, NO, NO.
84
00:04:19,990 --> 00:04:21,562
NO, I LIVE HERE.
85
00:04:23,364 --> 00:04:25,636
I-I CAN PROVE IT.
86
00:04:25,636 --> 00:04:28,038
I KNOW EXACTLY
WHAT'S IN THIS GARBAGE BAG.
87
00:04:28,038 --> 00:04:30,941
UM, EMPTY CARTON OF EGGS,
COFFEE GRINDS,
88
00:04:30,941 --> 00:04:32,543
SHAMPOO BOTTLE...
89
00:04:32,543 --> 00:04:34,475
WART REMOVAL CREAM?
90
00:04:34,475 --> 00:04:36,347
(garbage bag rustles)
91
00:04:36,347 --> 00:04:39,310
YOU'RE RIGHT. I'M HOMELESS.
92
00:04:39,310 --> 00:04:40,651
(both chuckle)
93
00:04:40,651 --> 00:04:43,984
SUSAN MAYER. OH.
94
00:04:43,984 --> 00:04:47,017
IT'S ALL CLEARED UP.
95
00:04:47,017 --> 00:04:50,721
MM. EDIE BRITT. I JUST
MOVED IN DOWN THE STREET.
96
00:04:50,721 --> 00:04:53,394
OH, YEAH.
I SAW THE MOVING VAN. WELCOME.
97
00:04:53,394 --> 00:04:54,925
THANKS.
98
00:04:54,925 --> 00:04:57,067
SO IS IT JUST YOU,
OR DO YOU HAVE A FAMILY?
99
00:04:57,067 --> 00:04:59,570
I HAVE A SON.
HE LIVES WITH HIS DAD.
100
00:04:59,570 --> 00:05:02,703
IT'S A LONG STORY. I'LL TELL YOU
ONE DAY OVER A MARGARITA.
101
00:05:04,705 --> 00:05:07,778
YOU WANNA INVITE ME IN
FOR A MARGARITA?
102
00:05:07,778 --> 00:05:10,711
HOW ABOUT COFFEE?
I JUST PUT ON A POT.
103
00:05:10,711 --> 00:05:12,042
(chuckles) GREAT.
104
00:05:12,042 --> 00:05:14,545
YOU CAN FILL ME IN ON ALL
OF THE NEIGHBORHOOD GOSSIP,
105
00:05:14,545 --> 00:05:16,547
STARTING WITH THE REDHEAD
ACROSS THE STREET
106
00:05:16,547 --> 00:05:19,049
WITH THE MUFFIN BASKET.
THAT'S A ROBOT, RIGHT?
107
00:05:19,049 --> 00:05:21,021
FUNNY AND LIKES TO GOSSIP.
108
00:05:21,021 --> 00:05:24,024
WE'RE GONNA GET ALONG
JUST FINE.
YES, WE ARE.
109
00:05:26,657 --> 00:05:29,560
(panting) WAIT. STOP.
110
00:05:29,560 --> 00:05:32,733
COULD WE JUST REST
FOR A SECOND?
111
00:05:32,733 --> 00:05:35,836
WE'VE ONLY GONE FOUR BLOCKS.
112
00:05:35,836 --> 00:05:38,569
OKAY, I LIED.
113
00:05:38,569 --> 00:05:40,070
I HATE RUNNING.
114
00:05:40,070 --> 00:05:42,072
WELL, WHY DIDN'T YOU
SAY SOMETHING?
115
00:05:42,072 --> 00:05:45,546
WE'VE BEEN DOING THIS
FOR A WEEK.
BECAUSE WE WERE STARTING
TO BECOME FRIENDS,
116
00:05:45,546 --> 00:05:48,018
AND YOU LIKE TO RUN,
AND I LIKE TO...
117
00:05:48,018 --> 00:05:50,421
SIT AND...
118
00:05:50,421 --> 00:05:52,423
ONE OF US HAD TO GIVE.
119
00:05:52,423 --> 00:05:55,055
HI, SUSAN!
OH, HI, HELEN, ED.
120
00:05:55,055 --> 00:05:56,787
I WOULD HAVE INTRODUCED YOU,
121
00:05:56,787 --> 00:05:58,959
BUT ONCE HELEN STARTS TALKING,
SHE DOESN'T SHUT UP.
122
00:05:58,959 --> 00:06:02,833
RIGHT. ED TOLD ME THAT.
OH, YOU MET ED?
123
00:06:02,833 --> 00:06:06,036
OH, YEAH. I'VE GOTTEN
TO KNOW HIM QUITE WELL.
124
00:06:06,036 --> 00:06:07,498
YEAH?
125
00:06:07,498 --> 00:06:09,540
WE'RE KINDA...
126
00:06:09,540 --> 00:06:11,001
DOING IT.
127
00:06:11,001 --> 00:06:12,943
DOING WHAT?
128
00:06:12,943 --> 00:06:15,806
IT.
129
00:06:15,806 --> 00:06:17,678
ED IS MARRIED.
130
00:06:17,678 --> 00:06:20,911
YEAH, I'M A NAUGHTY GIRL.
131
00:06:20,911 --> 00:06:24,455
NO, YOU'RE BEING IMMORAL.
132
00:06:24,455 --> 00:06:26,657
YOU'RE COMMITTING ADULTERY.
133
00:06:26,657 --> 00:06:31,391
ACTUALLY, ED'S COMMITTING
ADULTERY. I'M JUST GETTING LAID.
134
00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:33,694
YOU KNOW,
FORGET I EVER MENTIONED IT.
135
00:06:33,694 --> 00:06:35,726
I CAN'T FORGET
SOMETHING LIKE THIS.
136
00:06:35,726 --> 00:06:38,829
HELEN IS MY VERY GOOD FRIEND.
I THOUGHT YOU JUST SAID
THAT SHE WAS--
137
00:06:38,829 --> 00:06:41,832
SHE IS ANNOYING, AND I HIDE
WHEN SHE KNOCKS ON MY DOOR,
138
00:06:41,832 --> 00:06:45,906
BUT SHE DOES NOT DESERVE FOR YOU
TO BE WRECKING HER MARRIAGE.
139
00:06:45,906 --> 00:06:47,407
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
140
00:06:47,407 --> 00:06:49,039
HOME.
141
00:06:49,039 --> 00:06:51,682
(mocking) OH, SO YOU'RE NOT
GONNA BE MY FRIEND ANYMORE?
142
00:06:51,682 --> 00:06:55,045
I DON'T THINK SO.
143
00:06:55,045 --> 00:06:56,587
I THOUGHT
YOU DIDN'T LIKE RUNNING.
144
00:06:56,587 --> 00:06:59,019
WELL, IT DEPENDS
ON WHAT I'M RUNNING AWAY FROM!
145
00:06:59,019 --> 00:07:01,051
(sighs)
146
00:07:03,494 --> 00:07:06,026
HI. I'M THE WHORE
THAT LIVES DOWN THE STREET.
147
00:07:06,026 --> 00:07:07,898
COULD I BORROW
A CUP OF CONDOMS?
148
00:07:07,898 --> 00:07:10,100
A CUP? ARE YOU SURE
THAT'LL BE ENOUGH?
149
00:07:10,100 --> 00:07:12,563
LOOK, I KNOW
THAT YOU DON'T LIKE ME,
150
00:07:12,563 --> 00:07:15,706
BUT I AM HERE
TO DO YOU A FAVOR ANYWAY.
151
00:07:17,007 --> 00:07:19,039
I WAS OUT TO DINNER
LAST NIGHT,
152
00:07:19,039 --> 00:07:22,042
AND I SAW YOUR HUSBAND
WITH ANOTHER WOMAN.
REALLY?
153
00:07:22,042 --> 00:07:24,214
I FEEL BAD SAYING IT,
154
00:07:24,214 --> 00:07:28,819
BUT IF I WERE IN YOUR SHOES,
I WOULD WANT TO KNOW.
155
00:07:28,819 --> 00:07:30,450
YOU'RE WELCOME.
156
00:07:30,450 --> 00:07:33,083
OH, I GET IT.
157
00:07:33,083 --> 00:07:37,087
SO YOU FEEL I JUDGED YOU,
AND FOR REVENGE,
158
00:07:37,087 --> 00:07:39,790
YOU'RE TRYING TO MAKE ME
INSECURE ABOUT MY MARRIAGE.
159
00:07:39,790 --> 00:07:41,792
(chuckles)
IF I WANTED REVENGE,
160
00:07:41,792 --> 00:07:45,135
I WOULD HAVE JOINED THEM
AND MADE IT A THREESOME.
161
00:07:45,135 --> 00:07:47,137
YOU KNOW,
KARL WOULD NEVER CHEAT,
162
00:07:47,137 --> 00:07:50,601
AND THE WOMAN HE WAS WITH--
BRANDI, HIS SECRETARY,
163
00:07:50,601 --> 00:07:52,903
AND HE TOOK HER OUT
FOR HER BIRTHDAY.
164
00:07:52,903 --> 00:07:54,905
OH, THE OLD
"I'M TAKING MY SECRETARY
165
00:07:54,905 --> 00:07:56,947
OUT FOR HER BIRTHDAY"
ROUTINE.
166
00:07:56,947 --> 00:08:00,180
HMM. NICE TIP OF THE HAT
TO THE CLASSICS.
167
00:08:00,180 --> 00:08:03,754
(scoffs) OKAY, WELL,
SINCE YOU'RE ON THIS MORAL ROLL,
168
00:08:03,754 --> 00:08:05,756
WHY DON'T WE WALK
OVER TO HELEN'S?
169
00:08:05,756 --> 00:08:07,758
AND I WILL INTRODUCE YOU.
WE CAN HAVE SOME TEA,
170
00:08:07,758 --> 00:08:09,760
AND THEN YOU TWO
COULD SWAP STORIES
171
00:08:09,760 --> 00:08:11,692
ABOUT
ED'S FAVORITE POSITIONS.
172
00:08:11,692 --> 00:08:15,666
WHAT I DO AND WHAT BRANDI'S
DOING IS COMPLETELY DIFFERENT.
173
00:08:15,666 --> 00:08:16,767
HOW?
174
00:08:16,767 --> 00:08:20,000
I'M NOT LOOKING TO BREAK UP
ANYONE'S MARRIAGE.
175
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:22,232
I'M IN IT FOR A LITTLE FUN,
SOME FREE MEALS
176
00:08:22,232 --> 00:08:25,235
AND TO HELP AN UNHAPPY MAN
THROUGH HIS MIDLIFE CRISIS.
177
00:08:25,235 --> 00:08:30,140
WOW. YOU'RE JUST A GIVER.
(chuckles)
178
00:08:30,140 --> 00:08:31,742
FINE.
179
00:08:31,742 --> 00:08:34,014
USE ALL OF YOUR ENERGY
JUDGING ME
180
00:08:34,014 --> 00:08:36,016
AND IGNORE THE REAL PROBLEM.
181
00:08:36,016 --> 00:08:38,919
BUT LET ME
TELL YOU SOMETHING.
182
00:08:38,919 --> 00:08:40,921
THIS IS MY AREA OF EXPERTISE,
183
00:08:40,921 --> 00:08:42,923
AND I SAW THE LOOK
IN THAT WOMAN'S EYES.
184
00:08:42,923 --> 00:08:46,597
SHE'S NOT IN IT FOR THE FREE
MEALS. SHE'S IN IT FOR KEEPS.
185
00:08:50,060 --> 00:08:51,832
YOU SHOULD LEAVE NOW.
186
00:08:51,832 --> 00:08:53,764
YOU KNOW, SUSAN,
187
00:08:53,764 --> 00:08:56,166
I'M TRYING
TO HELP MY NEIGHBOR OUT.
188
00:08:56,166 --> 00:09:01,111
I THOUGHT IT WAS
THE MORAL THING TO DO.
189
00:09:04,945 --> 00:09:06,947
THREE WEEKS LATER,
I FOUND BRANDI'S BRA
190
00:09:06,947 --> 00:09:10,851
IN KARL'S GLOVE COMPARTMENT,
AND, WELL, YOU KNOW THE REST.
191
00:09:10,851 --> 00:09:13,924
SAY WHAT YOU WANT ABOUT EDIE,
SHE REALLY UNDERSTOOD MEN.
192
00:09:13,924 --> 00:09:17,688
I SHOULD HOPE SO. AFTER ALL
THOSE YEARS OF RESEARCH...
(chuckles)
193
00:09:17,688 --> 00:09:19,029
(chuckles)
194
00:09:19,029 --> 00:09:21,031
I CAN'T HELP THINKING ABOUT
195
00:09:21,031 --> 00:09:24,094
ALL THE TIMES EDIE AND I
SNIPED AT EACH OTHER.
196
00:09:24,094 --> 00:09:26,096
WE COULD HAVE BEEN
GOOD FRIENDS.
197
00:09:26,096 --> 00:09:29,640
WELL, IF SHE KNEW WHAT
YOU'RE ABOUT TO DO FOR HER,
198
00:09:29,640 --> 00:09:32,042
SHE'D FORGIVE YOU
FOR EVERYTHING.
199
00:09:45,856 --> 00:09:48,158
OKAY, MY HOUR'S UP.
SOMEONE ELSE HOLD EDIE NOW.
200
00:09:48,158 --> 00:09:50,160
MM.
I'LL TAKE HER.
201
00:09:56,697 --> 00:09:58,699
KINDA LOOKS LIKE CAT LITTER.
202
00:09:58,699 --> 00:10:01,131
LYNETTE, DON'T LOOK AT EDIE.
203
00:10:01,131 --> 00:10:04,635
OR WHAT, I'LL TURN TO STONE?
SHE'S ALL ROUGH AND GRITTY.
204
00:10:04,635 --> 00:10:07,607
UH, GABY, BEFORE WE LEARN
WHAT EDIE TASTES LIKE...
205
00:10:07,607 --> 00:10:09,109
I GOT IT. (sighs)
206
00:10:09,109 --> 00:10:11,782
I THINK A LITTLE MORE REVERENCE
FOR THE DEAD IS IN ORDER.
207
00:10:11,782 --> 00:10:13,784
OH, PLEASE.
WE'RE TALKING ABOUT EDIE.
208
00:10:13,784 --> 00:10:16,316
A LITTLE MORE IRREVERENCE
IS WHAT WE NEED.
209
00:10:16,316 --> 00:10:19,189
GIVE IT.
210
00:10:25,095 --> 00:10:29,760
DO YOU GUYS REMEMBER WHEN YOU
TOOK TURNS DRIVING ME TO CHEMO?
211
00:10:29,760 --> 00:10:32,863
(Lynette) WELL,
NONE OF YOU DID IT LIKE EDIE.
212
00:10:34,104 --> 00:10:35,806
HEY, LYNETTE.
213
00:10:35,806 --> 00:10:38,138
HEY.
214
00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:39,309
HOW YOU FEELIN'?
215
00:10:39,309 --> 00:10:41,141
EH, SAME.
216
00:10:41,141 --> 00:10:43,073
WELL, HERE'S THE DVD
YOU ASKED FOR.
217
00:10:43,073 --> 00:10:46,316
THANKS. I'LL WATCH IT DURING
CHEMO IF I'M NOT TOO TIRED.
218
00:10:46,316 --> 00:10:49,119
HERE WE GO.
219
00:10:49,119 --> 00:10:51,651
OH, HI, EDIE.
220
00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:53,423
HI. UGH. WHAT IS THAT?
221
00:10:53,423 --> 00:10:55,986
IT'S A HEALTH SHAKE
OF FERMENTED BROWN RICE,
222
00:10:55,986 --> 00:10:57,327
AND FOR HER ENTRéE,
223
00:10:57,327 --> 00:11:00,761
A SALAD OF RADISH,
BURDOCK ROOT AND BOK CHOY.
224
00:11:00,761 --> 00:11:03,233
MMM. WHAT'S FOR DESSERT,
WATERBOARDING?
225
00:11:03,233 --> 00:11:05,065
THANKS.
226
00:11:05,065 --> 00:11:06,967
I CAN'T GET COMFORTABLE.
227
00:11:06,967 --> 00:11:09,800
COULD YOU FLUFF MY PILLOWS?
OF COURSE.
228
00:11:11,301 --> 00:11:13,303
WELL, I'VE GOT ERRANDS TO RUN,
229
00:11:13,303 --> 00:11:17,077
AND I'LL BE BACK
TO DRIVE YOU TO CHEMO.
BEFORE YOU GO, WOULD YOU
PUT MY SOCKS BACK ON?
230
00:11:17,077 --> 00:11:20,250
MY FEET ARE COLD AGAIN.
231
00:11:20,250 --> 00:11:23,213
OH, OF COURSE.
232
00:11:23,213 --> 00:11:26,016
KATHERINE,
YOU HAVE GOT STUFF TO DO.
233
00:11:26,016 --> 00:11:28,188
WHY DON'T I TAKE HER
TO CHEMO?
234
00:11:28,188 --> 00:11:30,060
IT'S FINE.
235
00:11:30,060 --> 00:11:31,321
OKAY.
236
00:11:31,321 --> 00:11:33,223
SEE YOU TOMORROW THEN.
237
00:11:33,223 --> 00:11:34,424
BYE.
238
00:11:38,368 --> 00:11:40,230
OKAY, WHERE'S YOUR COAT?
239
00:11:40,230 --> 00:11:43,033
(door opens and closes)
WHY? CHEMO'S NOT UNTIL 5:00.
240
00:11:43,033 --> 00:11:47,237
YEAH, I'VE GOTTA MAKE
A LITTLE STOP ON THE WAY.
241
00:11:47,237 --> 00:11:48,739
(blues music playing)
242
00:11:48,739 --> 00:11:52,783
(indistinct conversations)
243
00:11:52,783 --> 00:11:55,846
(all) EDIE!
WHOO!
244
00:11:55,846 --> 00:11:57,147
BEEN HERE BEFORE?
245
00:11:57,147 --> 00:11:59,449
A COUPLE OF TIMES.
YOU'RE GONNA LOVE IT. HEY!
246
00:11:59,449 --> 00:12:01,721
LOVE IT? I HAVE CANCER.
247
00:12:01,721 --> 00:12:04,494
I PROBABLY SHOULDN'T EVEN USE
THE LADIES' ROOM IN THIS PLACE.
248
00:12:04,494 --> 00:12:07,097
OH, THERE ISN'T A LADIES' ROOM,
SO THAT'S NOT A PROBLEM.
249
00:12:07,097 --> 00:12:09,029
UM, I...
250
00:12:09,029 --> 00:12:12,102
EDIE, I HAVE CHEMO
IN HALF AN HOUR.
251
00:12:12,102 --> 00:12:16,066
FINE.
THEN WE BETTER START DRINKING.
I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO DRINK.
252
00:12:16,066 --> 00:12:19,069
AND THEY'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO DO
TATTOOS IN THE KITCHEN,
253
00:12:19,069 --> 00:12:22,072
BUT I HAVE A BALD EAGLE
ON MY ASS THAT SAYS OTHERWISE.
254
00:12:22,072 --> 00:12:24,074
TWO TEQUILA SHOOTERS!
(slaps counter)
255
00:12:24,074 --> 00:12:28,118
HEY, EDIE!
REGGIE! OH, I THOUGHT
YOU WERE IN FLORIDA.
256
00:12:28,118 --> 00:12:31,121
NAH. THAT WAS JUST A BODY
THEY IDENTIFIED AS ME.
257
00:12:31,121 --> 00:12:34,184
OH. (laughs) REGGIE,
THIS IS MY FRIEND LYNETTE.
258
00:12:34,184 --> 00:12:36,787
I'M TRYING TO CHEER HER UP
A LITTLE.
259
00:12:36,787 --> 00:12:39,059
RIGHT ON.
YOU WANNA SHOOT SOME STICK?
260
00:12:39,059 --> 00:12:40,190
UH...
261
00:12:40,190 --> 00:12:41,491
NO, THANKS.
262
00:12:41,491 --> 00:12:44,334
OH, COME ON.
YOU CAN TOTALLY TAKE HIM.
263
00:12:44,334 --> 00:12:48,238
NO, I CAN'T. UH, SEE?
(chuckles) CANCER.
264
00:12:48,238 --> 00:12:50,871
OH. NO SWEAT.
265
00:12:53,143 --> 00:12:54,104
(click)
266
00:12:54,104 --> 00:12:56,847
I'LL PLAY YOU ONE-HANDED.
267
00:12:58,909 --> 00:13:01,481
CAN YOU EXCUSE US
FOR ONE SECOND?
268
00:13:01,481 --> 00:13:04,554
(chuckles nervously)
269
00:13:04,554 --> 00:13:08,318
I NEED TO GO TO CHEMO.
I HAVE--
CANCER. YEAH, I HEARD.
270
00:13:10,260 --> 00:13:12,362
AND WHAT DO YOU WANT
FROM ME?
271
00:13:12,362 --> 00:13:15,165
I WANT YOU TO FLUFF
YOUR OWN PILLOWS.
272
00:13:15,165 --> 00:13:17,567
YOU NEED TO START
FIGHTING THIS THING.
273
00:13:17,567 --> 00:13:19,499
I'M DOING THE BEST I CAN.
274
00:13:19,499 --> 00:13:21,201
OH, NOT EVEN CLOSE.
275
00:13:21,201 --> 00:13:25,135
HELL, LYNETTE, YOU--YOU ARE
THE STRONGEST PERSON I KNOW.
276
00:13:25,135 --> 00:13:28,909
YOU'RE EVEN STRONGER THAN ME,
AND THAT'S SAYING SOMETHING.
277
00:13:32,082 --> 00:13:34,144
NOW...
278
00:13:34,144 --> 00:13:37,487
I MAY BE A LITTLE OUT OF LINE
BRINGING YOU HERE,
279
00:13:37,487 --> 00:13:40,290
BUT YOU NEED TO REMEMBER
WHO YOU ARE.
280
00:13:40,290 --> 00:13:42,192
SCREW CANCER.
281
00:13:42,192 --> 00:13:46,056
YOU ARE LYNETTE SCAVO.
282
00:13:49,930 --> 00:13:52,362
TWO TEQUILAS.
283
00:14:05,175 --> 00:14:06,846
(coughs)
284
00:14:06,846 --> 00:14:11,521
NOW... WHERE'S THAT
ONE-ARMED FRIEND OF YOURS?
285
00:14:11,521 --> 00:14:15,285
I'M--WANNA SHOOT SOME STICK.
(laughs)
286
00:14:21,031 --> 00:14:22,192
(all laughing)
287
00:14:22,192 --> 00:14:25,465
WOW. IT SOUNDS LIKE SHE GAVE YOU
JUST WHAT YOU NEEDED.
288
00:14:25,465 --> 00:14:28,168
GOOD FOR EDIE.
SHE NEVER LET ME
FORGET IT EITHER.
289
00:14:28,168 --> 00:14:29,869
SHE ALWAYS INSISTED
290
00:14:29,869 --> 00:14:33,143
IT WAS THE TEQUILA SHOOTERS
THAT KILLED THE CANCER.
(clank, rattling)
291
00:14:33,143 --> 00:14:35,175
OH, WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?
292
00:14:35,175 --> 00:14:37,547
OH, NOT NOW. WE HAVE A FLAT.
293
00:14:37,547 --> 00:14:41,181
MAYBE IT'S A SIGN WE'RE NOT
SUPPOSED TO DO THIS TODAY.
294
00:14:41,181 --> 00:14:43,183
NICE TRY.
295
00:14:44,554 --> 00:14:47,217
(sighs)
WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS.
296
00:14:47,217 --> 00:14:49,659
ANYBODY KNOW
HOW TO CHANGE A TIRE?
297
00:14:53,123 --> 00:14:54,594
(sighs)
298
00:15:06,406 --> 00:15:10,440
YOU WANT TO HAND ME
THAT CROSS WRENCH?
DO YOU WANNA TELL ME
WHAT THAT IS?
299
00:15:10,440 --> 00:15:12,142
IT'S THE T-SHAPED DEALIE
300
00:15:12,142 --> 00:15:15,445
I'M GONNA WHACK YOU WITH
IF YOU DON'T HAND IT OVER.
301
00:15:15,445 --> 00:15:17,447
YOU KNOW,
EDIE USED TO LIVE AROUND HERE
302
00:15:17,447 --> 00:15:20,620
WHEN SHE MOVED AWAY
FROM WISTERIA LANE.
303
00:15:20,620 --> 00:15:23,954
YOU MEAN WHEN YOU GALS
GAVE HER THE BOOT.
LESS YAKKIN', MORE JACKIN'.
304
00:15:23,954 --> 00:15:26,957
BREE, HOW DID YOU KNOW
WHERE SHE LIVED?
305
00:15:26,957 --> 00:15:30,330
UM, I RAN INTO HER ONCE,
UNEXPECTEDLY...
306
00:15:30,330 --> 00:15:33,964
IN A PLACE
I NEVER THOUGHT I'D BE.
307
00:15:33,964 --> 00:15:35,665
BREE HODGE.
308
00:15:37,367 --> 00:15:39,409
FOLLOW ME.
I'LL GET YOU SITUATED,
309
00:15:39,409 --> 00:15:41,541
AND I'LL BRING
YOUR HUSBAND IN.
310
00:15:41,541 --> 00:15:43,243
(door buzzes)
311
00:15:45,015 --> 00:15:48,048
(indistinct conversations)
312
00:15:53,083 --> 00:15:54,554
IS THAT THE VISITORS' ROOM?
313
00:15:54,554 --> 00:15:56,356
YEAH. WHY?
314
00:15:56,356 --> 00:15:59,990
YOU DON'T HAPPEN TO HAVE
A PRIVATE ROOM, DO YOU?
315
00:15:59,990 --> 00:16:02,562
(scoffs)
316
00:16:02,562 --> 00:16:04,564
YOU MEAN, LIKE AN UPGRADE,
317
00:16:04,564 --> 00:16:07,197
SOMETHING WITH A COUCH
AND SOFTER LIGHTING?
318
00:16:07,197 --> 00:16:10,470
THAT WOULD BE LOVELY.
319
00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:13,173
OH.
YOU WERE BEING SARCASTIC.
320
00:16:13,173 --> 00:16:16,046
YES, MA'AM.
ARE YOU READY TO--
321
00:16:16,046 --> 00:16:18,978
OH, NOT, UH, JUST YET.
322
00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:22,482
IT'S NOT A BAD IDEA,
HAVING AN UPGRADE AVAILABLE.
323
00:16:22,482 --> 00:16:25,555
I BET THAT'S A PERK PEOPLE
WOULD BE WILLING TO PAY FOR.
324
00:16:25,555 --> 00:16:27,687
MA'AM, IT'S A PRISON.
325
00:16:27,687 --> 00:16:31,321
THE ONLY PERK WE OFFER IS
A CAVITY SEARCH.
326
00:16:31,321 --> 00:16:33,423
UM...
327
00:16:33,423 --> 00:16:35,765
TO BE HONEST,
I-I'M NOT FEELING UP TO THIS.
328
00:16:35,765 --> 00:16:39,229
I'M GONNA HAVE
TO COME BACK ANOTHER DAY.
329
00:16:39,229 --> 00:16:41,171
FINE. HE'S GOT ANOTHER VISITOR
SCHEDULED ANYWAY,
330
00:16:41,171 --> 00:16:44,534
SO I DON'T EVEN HAVE TO TELL HIM
YOU WERE HERE.
ANOTHER VISITOR? WHO?
331
00:16:44,534 --> 00:16:47,207
SOME LADY.
SHE VISITS HIM EVERY WEEK.
332
00:16:47,207 --> 00:16:49,139
EVERY WEEK?
WHAT'S HER NAME?
333
00:16:49,139 --> 00:16:51,441
I CAN'T GIVE YOU THAT.
334
00:16:51,441 --> 00:16:55,385
IF SHE'S VISITING MY HUSBAND,
I THINK I HAVE A RIGHT TO KNOW.
335
00:16:55,385 --> 00:16:59,049
MA'AM, I'M SORRY,
BUT I CANNOT GIVE YOU HER NAME.
336
00:16:59,049 --> 00:17:01,321
REALLY?
337
00:17:01,321 --> 00:17:05,495
BECAUSE I WOULD CONSIDER THAT
A PERK WORTH PAYING FOR.
338
00:17:11,761 --> 00:17:14,134
WELL, WELL.
339
00:17:14,134 --> 00:17:16,166
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
340
00:17:16,166 --> 00:17:18,268
I WANTED TO SEE YOU.
341
00:17:18,268 --> 00:17:21,071
AND YOU DIDN'T
BRING MUFFINS?
342
00:17:21,071 --> 00:17:24,244
IT ISN'T
THAT KIND OF VISIT.
343
00:17:29,119 --> 00:17:32,322
NO MUFFINS, NO SMALL TALK.
344
00:17:32,322 --> 00:17:35,185
SHOULD I BE SCARED
OR GRATEFUL?
345
00:17:35,185 --> 00:17:38,228
I STOPPED BY
THE PRISON TODAY.
346
00:17:38,228 --> 00:17:40,790
THE GUARD TELLS ME
YOU'VE BEEN VISITING ORSON--
347
00:17:40,790 --> 00:17:43,593
SOMETIMES TWICE A WEEK,
SHE SAID.
348
00:17:43,593 --> 00:17:47,066
OH. WHO KNEW LADY PRISON GUARDS
COULD BE SO CHATTY?
349
00:17:47,066 --> 00:17:49,239
WHAT ARE YOU UP TO, EDIE?
350
00:17:49,239 --> 00:17:51,241
I'M NOT UP TO ANYTHING,
YOU REDHEADED ICE CUBE.
351
00:17:51,241 --> 00:17:53,743
HE'S 15 MINUTES AWAY.
352
00:17:53,743 --> 00:17:57,177
AND QUITE FRANKLY,
I FEEL SORRY FOR HIM.
353
00:17:57,177 --> 00:18:00,450
AFTER ALL, I KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE
TO BE EXILED FROM SUBURBIA.
354
00:18:00,450 --> 00:18:03,453
SO YOU'RE NOT...
355
00:18:03,453 --> 00:18:05,515
TRYING TO START UP SOMETHING?
356
00:18:05,515 --> 00:18:08,718
HE'S IN JAIL.
357
00:18:08,718 --> 00:18:12,392
MY BOOBS ARE IMPRESSIVE,
BUT THEY CAN'T BEND IRON BARS.
358
00:18:12,392 --> 00:18:14,864
WELL...
359
00:18:14,864 --> 00:18:18,428
THANK YOU FOR...
CHECKING IN ON HIM
360
00:18:18,428 --> 00:18:21,571
AND FOR ANSWERING
MY QUESTION.
361
00:18:24,204 --> 00:18:28,138
I HAVE A QUESTION.
362
00:18:28,138 --> 00:18:30,780
WHY AREN'T YOU VISITING HIM?
363
00:18:30,780 --> 00:18:33,313
OH, WELL,
MY SCHEDULE IS JUST UNREAL,
364
00:18:33,313 --> 00:18:36,216
WHAT WITH THE CATERING COMPANY
AND LOOKING AFTER BENJAMIN.
365
00:18:36,216 --> 00:18:38,888
YEAH, WELL, WE'RE ALL BUSY.
366
00:18:38,888 --> 00:18:41,120
COME ON.
367
00:18:41,120 --> 00:18:43,153
WHY HAVEN'T YOU
BEEN TO SEE HIM?
368
00:18:47,457 --> 00:18:50,360
THAT JAIL IS...
369
00:18:50,360 --> 00:18:53,233
IT'S DISGUSTING.
370
00:18:53,233 --> 00:18:59,369
ALL THOSE MEN IN CAGES,
LIKE ANIMALS.
371
00:18:59,369 --> 00:19:02,742
EVEN TO STEP FOOT IN THAT PLACE
IS HUMILIATING.
372
00:19:02,742 --> 00:19:06,846
THAT MAN
WENT TO JAIL FOR YOU.
373
00:19:06,846 --> 00:19:10,250
DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA
HOW MUCH HE MUST LOVE YOU?
374
00:19:12,222 --> 00:19:14,384
I DO.
375
00:19:14,384 --> 00:19:18,428
THEN WHY CAN'T YOU SUCK IT UP
ONCE A MONTH AND GO AND SAY HI?
376
00:19:18,428 --> 00:19:23,193
TRY TO HELP HIM GET THROUGH
THIS LIVING NIGHTMARE.
377
00:19:23,193 --> 00:19:25,195
WHY CAN'T YOU DO THAT?
378
00:19:27,867 --> 00:19:32,342
NOW AS I THINK ABOUT IT,
379
00:19:32,342 --> 00:19:33,743
DON'T VISIT HIM.
380
00:19:33,743 --> 00:19:36,306
HE CAN DO SO MUCH BETTER
THAN YOU.
381
00:19:49,389 --> 00:19:50,690
(door buzzes)
382
00:20:07,237 --> 00:20:10,780
SO... HOW ARE YOU DOING?
383
00:20:10,780 --> 00:20:13,383
HOW DO YOU THINK?
384
00:20:17,247 --> 00:20:20,290
YOU'RE RIGHT.
I SHOULDN'T HAVE ASKED.
385
00:20:20,290 --> 00:20:22,952
(voice breaks)
I KNOW IT'S HORRIBLE HERE.
386
00:20:22,952 --> 00:20:25,495
HOW WOULD YOU KNOW?
387
00:20:25,495 --> 00:20:27,226
YOU'VE NEVER BEEN.
388
00:20:28,728 --> 00:20:30,730
YOU HAVE EVERY RIGHT
TO HATE ME.
389
00:20:33,303 --> 00:20:36,566
THERE'S NO NEED
TO BE MELODRAMATIC.
390
00:20:36,566 --> 00:20:38,908
I MEANT FOR ASKING YOU
TO COME HERE,
391
00:20:38,908 --> 00:20:41,240
FOR INSISTING
YOU TURN YOURSELF IN.
392
00:20:43,413 --> 00:20:46,776
OH.
NOW THAT I SEE THIS PLACE, I
DON'T KNOW WHAT I WAS THINKING.
393
00:20:46,776 --> 00:20:48,278
YOU WERE THINKING
394
00:20:48,278 --> 00:20:50,780
I NEEDED TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY
FOR WHAT I DID,
395
00:20:50,780 --> 00:20:52,452
AND YOU WERE RIGHT.
396
00:20:52,452 --> 00:20:56,386
BUT STILL, ASKING YOU TO MAKE
THIS SACRIFICE AND NOT...
397
00:20:56,386 --> 00:20:58,858
EVER...
398
00:20:58,858 --> 00:21:00,590
COMING TO SEE YOU...
399
00:21:06,936 --> 00:21:09,769
(whispers)
HOW CAN YOU EVER FORGIVE ME?
400
00:21:12,472 --> 00:21:14,574
JUST BE THERE
WHEN I GET OUT.
401
00:21:26,316 --> 00:21:28,618
(clank)
402
00:21:28,618 --> 00:21:33,062
I NEVER TOLD YOU ABOUT THAT
BECAUSE... I WAS EMBARRASSED.
403
00:21:33,062 --> 00:21:36,065
YEAH, EDIE BRITT SHAMED YOU
INTO BEING A BETTER HUMAN BEING.
404
00:21:36,065 --> 00:21:38,398
THAT IS EMBARRASSING.
405
00:21:39,699 --> 00:21:41,701
ALL RIGHT, LADIES,
WE'RE READY TO RIDE.
406
00:21:41,701 --> 00:21:43,703
GOOD. WE GOT SOME GROUND
TO MAKE UP.
407
00:21:43,703 --> 00:21:46,706
I WAS HOPING WE WOULD BE ABLE
TO GET THERE BEFORE DARK.
408
00:21:46,706 --> 00:21:49,909
HOW DO YOU THINK HE'LL REACT
WHEN WE TELL HIM?
HOW DO YOU THINK?
409
00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:03,052
I NEVER THOUGHT
EDIE WOULD BE CREMATED.
410
00:22:03,052 --> 00:22:04,554
I FIGURED SHE'D WANNA BE
411
00:22:04,554 --> 00:22:06,856
PUMPED FULL OF CHEMICALS
AND PRESERVED.
412
00:22:06,856 --> 00:22:10,360
ISN'T THAT WHAT SHE DID
FOR THE LAST 15 YEARS?
(chuckles)
413
00:22:10,360 --> 00:22:12,532
MY THEORY--
EDIE KNEW IF SHE WAS BURIED,
414
00:22:12,532 --> 00:22:15,535
HER TRUE DATE OF BIRTH
WOULD BE CARVED INTO A TOMBSTONE
415
00:22:15,535 --> 00:22:18,608
FOR ALL THE WORLD TO SEE.
YOU REALLY THINK
SHE SPENT A LOT OF TIME
416
00:22:18,608 --> 00:22:20,370
THINKING ABOUT HER DEATH?
417
00:22:20,370 --> 00:22:23,743
YEAH, I DO.
418
00:22:25,415 --> 00:22:27,747
(Gabrielle)
I SPENT A NIGHT WITH HER
419
00:22:27,747 --> 00:22:32,482
RIGHT AFTER CARLOS AND I
GOT DIVORCED.
IS THIS TOO RED? I THINK
I NEED SOMETHING PINKER.
420
00:22:32,482 --> 00:22:33,823
IT'S FINE. HURRY UP.
421
00:22:33,823 --> 00:22:38,488
I WANT TO GET TO THE CLUB WHILE
THIS BIKINI WAX IS STILL FRESH.
422
00:22:38,488 --> 00:22:40,490
(singsong voice)
THIS IS GONNA BE FUN.
(chuckles)
423
00:22:40,490 --> 00:22:43,493
I CAN'T BELIEVE WE'VE NEVER
GONE OUT ON THE TOWN TOGETHER.
424
00:22:43,493 --> 00:22:45,465
WELL, WE'VE NEVER BEEN SINGLE
TOGETHER BEFORE.
425
00:22:45,465 --> 00:22:48,468
OH, I FEEL SO SORRY FOR ALL
THOSE OTHER GIRLS IN THE BAR.
426
00:22:48,468 --> 00:22:50,039
OH, SO DO I.
427
00:22:50,039 --> 00:22:55,475
TO BE FAIR, WE SHOULD
PROBABLY WALK IN BACKWARDS.
428
00:22:55,475 --> 00:22:58,748
OH, NO, THAT WON'T WORK.
(chuckles)
429
00:22:58,748 --> 00:23:00,480
WE'RE AN UNSTOPPABLE TEAM.
430
00:23:00,480 --> 00:23:03,583
MM, THE HOTTEST CHICKS
ON WISTERIA LANE.
431
00:23:03,583 --> 00:23:05,585
OH, BE NICE.
432
00:23:05,585 --> 00:23:08,117
THERE ARE LOTS OF
ATTRACTIVE WOMEN ON THE STREET.
433
00:23:08,117 --> 00:23:09,419
LIKE WHO?
434
00:23:09,419 --> 00:23:11,120
HOW ABOUT BREE?
435
00:23:11,120 --> 00:23:13,392
UH, WITH THAT HAIR COLOR,
436
00:23:13,392 --> 00:23:15,394
YOU COULD STICK
A RED NOSE ON HER,
437
00:23:15,394 --> 00:23:17,396
AND SHE COULD JOIN
THE CIRCUS.
438
00:23:17,396 --> 00:23:18,928
LYNETTE'S BEAUTIFUL.
439
00:23:18,928 --> 00:23:20,600
MM, FOR A BABY FACTORY.
440
00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:23,533
AND SUSAN?
WE'RE THE HOTTEST, OKAY?
441
00:23:25,905 --> 00:23:28,037
WOW.
442
00:23:28,037 --> 00:23:30,910
TOO MUCH?
443
00:23:30,910 --> 00:23:33,613
NO, IT'S GREAT.
444
00:23:33,613 --> 00:23:35,615
ALL RIGHT.
COME ON. LET'S GO.
445
00:23:42,722 --> 00:23:45,855
(dance music playing)
446
00:23:45,855 --> 00:23:48,458
WOW! YOU WERE RIGHT
ABOUT THIS PLACE.
447
00:23:48,458 --> 00:23:52,431
TOLD YA. A LOT OF HOTTIES,
VERY FEW "NOTTIES."
448
00:23:52,431 --> 00:23:53,833
OOH.
449
00:23:53,833 --> 00:23:55,134
LADIES, THIS IS
450
00:23:55,134 --> 00:23:58,207
FROM THE GENTLEMAN
AT THE END OF THE BAR.
451
00:23:58,207 --> 00:24:00,570
OH, AND I JUST SAT DOWN.
452
00:24:00,570 --> 00:24:02,972
WELL,
THAT'S A PERSONAL BEST.
453
00:24:02,972 --> 00:24:05,074
ACTUALLY, THE DRINK'S FOR HER.
454
00:24:05,074 --> 00:24:08,177
OH. (chuckles)
455
00:24:08,177 --> 00:24:10,079
♪♪♪
456
00:24:10,079 --> 00:24:12,582
OH!
IT'S PRETTY DARK IN HERE.
457
00:24:12,582 --> 00:24:14,584
HE PROBABLY DIDN'T GET
A GOOD LOOK AT ME.
458
00:24:14,584 --> 00:24:16,826
OH, EDIE,
DON'T TAKE IT PERSONALLY.
459
00:24:16,826 --> 00:24:18,528
WE'RE JUST DIFFERENT TYPES.
460
00:24:18,528 --> 00:24:21,160
YOU'RE RIGHT. SOME LIKE
TALL, BLONDE AND SEXY,
461
00:24:21,160 --> 00:24:23,633
AND SOME MEN LIKE...
462
00:24:23,633 --> 00:24:25,495
THAT.
463
00:24:25,495 --> 00:24:27,597
NOW, NOW, EDIE.
DON'T BE SNARKY.
464
00:24:27,597 --> 00:24:30,239
WE'RE BOTH HOT, REMEMBER?
465
00:24:30,239 --> 00:24:33,142
ALTHOUGH, APPARENTLY,
I'M JUST A LITTLE BIT HOTTER.
466
00:24:33,142 --> 00:24:35,805
(sighs) WELL,
ONE GUY MIGHT THINK SO.
467
00:24:35,805 --> 00:24:37,807
ONE GUY
WHO'S EVIDENTLY INTIMIDATED
468
00:24:37,807 --> 00:24:40,650
BY FULL-SIZED
WOMANLY BREASTS.
469
00:24:40,650 --> 00:24:44,083
HMM. YES, I GUESS I AM
A LITTLE ON THE SMALL SIDE.
470
00:24:44,083 --> 00:24:47,186
THAT'S THE DRAWBACK
TO HAVING ONES THAT ARE REAL.
471
00:24:47,186 --> 00:24:50,159
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
THESE ARE REAL.
472
00:24:50,159 --> 00:24:52,862
OH, EDIE, COME ON.
WHEN YOU JUMP UP AND DOWN,
473
00:24:52,862 --> 00:24:54,864
THE ROOM MOVES MORE
THAN YOUR BOOBS.
474
00:24:54,864 --> 00:24:56,225
(chuckles)
475
00:24:56,225 --> 00:25:00,229
WELL, SOMEONE OBVIOUSLY HAS
A CHIP ON HER SHOULDER.
476
00:25:00,229 --> 00:25:02,501
I'D REACH DOWN
AND KNOCK IT OFF,
477
00:25:02,501 --> 00:25:04,904
BUT I CAN'T GO DOWN THAT LOW.
(chuckles)
478
00:25:04,904 --> 00:25:08,538
OKAY, YOU REALLY THINK
YOU'RE HOTTER THAN ME?
479
00:25:08,538 --> 00:25:13,112
LET'S JUST SAY THAT I HAVE MORE
OF WHAT MEN WANT.
480
00:25:13,112 --> 00:25:16,916
YEAH? WELL, I HAVE A VODKA SODA
HERE THAT SAYS OTHERWISE.
481
00:25:16,916 --> 00:25:19,949
OOH! SO HE BOUGHT YOU
ONE DRINK--
482
00:25:19,949 --> 00:25:22,221
A WELL DRINK, I MIGHT ADD.
483
00:25:22,221 --> 00:25:25,224
WELL, IT'S ONE MORE
THAN YOU GOT.
484
00:25:27,096 --> 00:25:31,731
ARE YOU SAYING THAT I CAN'T GET
A MAN TO BUY ME A COCKTAIL?
485
00:25:31,731 --> 00:25:35,935
SURE, YOU CAN,
JUST NOT AS MANY AS ME.
486
00:25:35,935 --> 00:25:38,067
ONE HOUR.
487
00:25:38,067 --> 00:25:41,771
WHOEVER GETS THE MOST
SWIZZLE STICKS BY THE END WINS.
488
00:25:45,715 --> 00:25:48,878
SEE YA IN AN HOUR, LOSER.
489
00:25:52,251 --> 00:25:56,255
(Shampoo) ♪ I KNOW WHAT BOYS
LIKE, WE KNOW WHAT GUYS WANT ♪
490
00:25:56,255 --> 00:26:00,830
♪ I KNOW WHAT BOYS LIKE,
WE KNOW WHAT GUYS LIKE ♪
491
00:26:00,830 --> 00:26:02,732
♪ I MAKE THEM WANT ME ♪
492
00:26:02,732 --> 00:26:04,994
♪ I LIKE TO TEASE THEM ♪
493
00:26:04,994 --> 00:26:06,996
♪ THEY WANT TO TOUCH ME ♪
494
00:26:06,996 --> 00:26:09,198
♪ I NEVER LET THEM ♪
495
00:26:09,198 --> 00:26:11,240
♪ I KNOW WHAT BOYS LIKE ♪
496
00:26:11,240 --> 00:26:13,803
♪ WE KNOW WHAT GUYS WANT ♪
497
00:26:13,803 --> 00:26:16,305
♪ I KNOW WHAT BOYS LIKE ♪
498
00:26:16,305 --> 00:26:18,347
♪ BOYS LIKE ♪
499
00:26:18,347 --> 00:26:21,851
♪ BOYS LIKE ME ♪
500
00:26:21,851 --> 00:26:22,952
♪ SUCKER ♪
501
00:26:22,952 --> 00:26:25,084
♪ I KNOW WHAT BOYS LIKE ♪
502
00:26:25,084 --> 00:26:27,086
♪ WE KNOW WHAT GUYS WANT ♪
503
00:26:27,086 --> 00:26:29,288
♪ NA-NA NA-NA NA ♪
504
00:26:29,288 --> 00:26:32,021
♪ NA-NA NA-NA NA ♪
505
00:26:32,021 --> 00:26:35,725
(dance music playing)
506
00:26:35,725 --> 00:26:37,026
(laughs)
507
00:26:37,026 --> 00:26:41,230
COUNT 'EM AND WEEP, SOLIS.
508
00:26:42,732 --> 00:26:45,134
WELL,
I GUESS I COULD DO THAT.
509
00:26:46,776 --> 00:26:49,679
OR I COULD DO THIS.
510
00:26:49,679 --> 00:26:52,682
(woman laughs)
511
00:26:52,682 --> 00:26:54,844
(giggles)
512
00:26:54,844 --> 00:26:57,046
AH.
513
00:26:57,046 --> 00:26:59,048
I SHOULD MAKE
SOME KIND OF SPEECH.
514
00:26:59,048 --> 00:27:01,250
BUT I THINK IT'S ENOUGH. WE BOTH
KNOW I CRUSHED YOU, RIGHT?
515
00:27:01,250 --> 00:27:03,352
NOW IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME,
516
00:27:03,352 --> 00:27:07,727
SWIZZLE STICK NUMBER 17
HAS A YACHT AND GIANT FEET.
517
00:27:07,727 --> 00:27:09,228
♪♪♪
518
00:27:09,228 --> 00:27:11,630
WHOO-HOO!
519
00:27:23,843 --> 00:27:26,015
WHAT THE HELL
WERE YOU THINKING,
520
00:27:26,015 --> 00:27:29,148
ABANDONING ME
AT A SINGLES BAR?
521
00:27:31,751 --> 00:27:33,082
I'M SORRY.
522
00:27:33,082 --> 00:27:36,726
I JUST NEEDED TO BE
BY MYSELF FOR A WHILE.
523
00:27:36,726 --> 00:27:38,327
WHY? (scoffs)
524
00:27:38,327 --> 00:27:40,329
DON'T TELL ME
YOU'RE DEPRESSED
525
00:27:40,329 --> 00:27:42,331
BECAUSE YOU LOST
SOME STUPID GAME.
526
00:27:42,331 --> 00:27:43,833
I'M NOT DEPRESSED.
527
00:27:43,833 --> 00:27:46,365
I'M SURPRISED.
528
00:27:46,365 --> 00:27:49,138
IT'S GOING BY SO QUICKLY.
529
00:27:49,138 --> 00:27:50,439
WHAT IS?
530
00:27:52,341 --> 00:27:54,844
MY YOUTH.
531
00:27:54,844 --> 00:27:56,405
THE HARDER I TRY
TO HOLD ON TO IT,
532
00:27:56,405 --> 00:27:58,377
THE MORE IT JUST...
533
00:27:58,377 --> 00:28:01,180
SLIPS THROUGH MY FINGERS.
534
00:28:01,180 --> 00:28:04,153
AND ALL THE MAKEUP
AND DIM LIGHTING IN THE WORLD
535
00:28:04,153 --> 00:28:06,155
CAN'T SEEM TO STOP IT.
536
00:28:06,155 --> 00:28:09,318
OH, PLEASE.
YOU'RE GORGEOUS.
537
00:28:09,318 --> 00:28:12,862
AND YOU ARE GOING
TO STAY THAT WAY FOREVER.
538
00:28:12,862 --> 00:28:14,293
HMM.
539
00:28:14,293 --> 00:28:16,325
THAT'S THE TRICKY PART.
540
00:28:16,325 --> 00:28:18,427
I'M NOT GONNA BE OLD.
541
00:28:18,427 --> 00:28:19,929
WHAT?
542
00:28:19,929 --> 00:28:23,773
EVER SINCE I WAS A CHILD,
543
00:28:23,773 --> 00:28:26,405
I'VE KNOWN THAT I WAS
NEVER GONNA SEE 50.
544
00:28:26,405 --> 00:28:28,277
OH, THAT'S RIDICULOUS.
545
00:28:28,277 --> 00:28:30,239
NO, IT'S TRUE.
546
00:28:30,239 --> 00:28:32,241
AS FAR BACK
AS I CAN REMEMBER,
547
00:28:32,241 --> 00:28:35,384
A VOICE IN MY HEAD SAID,
"LIVE IT UP TODAY,
548
00:28:35,384 --> 00:28:38,387
'CAUSE YOU'RE NOT GONNA HAVE
A LOT OF TOMORROWS."
549
00:28:38,387 --> 00:28:39,889
YOU DO REALIZE
550
00:28:39,889 --> 00:28:43,352
THERE'S MEDICATION DESIGNED
TO GET RID OF THOSE VOICES?
551
00:28:43,352 --> 00:28:47,226
IT'S NOT A BAD THING,
GABY.
552
00:28:47,226 --> 00:28:50,459
IT'S ACTUALLY A GIFT.
553
00:28:50,459 --> 00:28:52,731
I...
554
00:28:52,731 --> 00:28:54,233
APPRECIATE MY LIFE
555
00:28:54,233 --> 00:28:58,808
IN A WAY
THAT MOST PEOPLE DON'T.
556
00:28:58,808 --> 00:29:03,242
I JUST DIDN'T EXPECT IT
TO GO BY THIS FAST.
557
00:29:03,242 --> 00:29:05,845
THAT'S ALL.
558
00:29:08,177 --> 00:29:09,478
WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT?
559
00:29:09,478 --> 00:29:14,053
I HAVE A VOICE INSIDE MY HEAD
THAT SAYS YOU'RE WRONG.
560
00:29:14,053 --> 00:29:17,356
IT TELLS ME
THAT 50 YEARS FROM NOW,
561
00:29:17,356 --> 00:29:19,989
YOU AND I WILL STILL BE
WEARING DRESSES TOO TIGHT
562
00:29:19,989 --> 00:29:22,832
AND WALKING IN HEELS TOO HIGH
563
00:29:22,832 --> 00:29:24,763
AND GOING TO BARS
564
00:29:24,763 --> 00:29:27,336
WHERE WE'LL MEET OLD GEEZERS
WHO'LL BUY US DRINKS
565
00:29:27,336 --> 00:29:31,801
WITH THE LAST OF
THEIR SOCIAL SECURITY CHECKS.
566
00:29:31,801 --> 00:29:34,473
IF YOU SAY SO.
567
00:29:36,305 --> 00:29:38,347
NOW COME ON.
LET'S GO TO MY HOUSE.
568
00:29:38,347 --> 00:29:42,882
LET'S POP OPEN A BOTTLE OF WINE
AND TOAST TO OUR FUTURE.
569
00:29:42,882 --> 00:29:47,016
WHY NOT?
570
00:29:47,016 --> 00:29:50,219
(chuckles)
571
00:29:53,062 --> 00:29:54,824
ISN'T THAT WEIRD?
572
00:29:54,824 --> 00:29:57,296
SHE KNEW
SHE WAS GONNA DIE YOUNG.
573
00:30:01,070 --> 00:30:04,403
WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU TWO WERE
THE HOTTEST CHICKS ON THE LANE?
574
00:30:04,403 --> 00:30:07,406
SHE CALLED ME
A BABY FACTORY?
575
00:30:07,406 --> 00:30:09,078
YEAH, GABY, IN HINDSIGHT,
576
00:30:09,078 --> 00:30:12,942
MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE TOLD
THAT PART OF THE STORY.
OH, PFFT.
577
00:30:12,942 --> 00:30:14,944
I THINK WE'RE HERE.
578
00:30:22,391 --> 00:30:25,394
(indistinct conversations)
579
00:30:27,957 --> 00:30:32,101
(sighs)
SO ARE WE READY FOR THIS?
580
00:30:32,101 --> 00:30:34,303
I DON'T KNOW.
581
00:30:34,303 --> 00:30:38,237
CAN YOU EVER BE READY TO TELL
A BOY THAT HIS MOTHER IS DEAD?
582
00:30:52,221 --> 00:30:54,323
HEY, TRAVERS.
583
00:30:56,585 --> 00:30:59,428
REMEMBER US?
584
00:30:59,428 --> 00:31:00,459
(chuckles)
585
00:31:00,459 --> 00:31:02,261
SURE.
586
00:31:02,261 --> 00:31:04,363
WOW. YOU BROUGHT
THE WHOLE NEIGHBORHOOD WITH YOU.
587
00:31:04,363 --> 00:31:06,465
(chuckles nervously)
588
00:31:06,465 --> 00:31:09,038
DID MY MOM COME WITH YOU?
589
00:31:13,502 --> 00:31:15,504
(Bree) WE BROUGHT YOU
SOME MUFFINS.
590
00:31:15,504 --> 00:31:17,576
YOU CAN SHARE THEM
WITH YOUR ROOMMATES
591
00:31:17,576 --> 00:31:19,578
OR MAYBE A FAVORITE TEACHER.
592
00:31:22,311 --> 00:31:24,483
WHAT'S GOING ON? (scoffs)
593
00:31:24,483 --> 00:31:27,116
IS MY MOM IN TROUBLE
OR SOMETHING?
594
00:31:31,020 --> 00:31:33,022
COME HERE.
595
00:31:36,425 --> 00:31:40,199
I'M AFRAID
WE HAVE SOME BAD NEWS.
596
00:31:40,199 --> 00:31:43,502
YOUR MOM WAS
IN A VERY SERIOUS ACCIDENT,
597
00:31:43,502 --> 00:31:47,676
AND I AM SO SORRY...
598
00:31:47,676 --> 00:31:49,608
BUT SHE PASSED AWAY.
599
00:31:53,412 --> 00:31:55,114
SHE DIED?
600
00:32:01,020 --> 00:32:02,221
WHEN?
601
00:32:02,221 --> 00:32:03,993
A COUPLE OF DAYS AGO.
602
00:32:03,993 --> 00:32:07,396
WE'VE BEEN TRYING
TO GET IN TOUCH WITH YOUR DAD,
603
00:32:07,396 --> 00:32:09,128
BUT HE'S STILL
OUT OF THE COUNTRY.
604
00:32:09,128 --> 00:32:11,260
AND YOUR MOM'S NEW HUSBAND'S
NEVER MET YOU,
605
00:32:11,260 --> 00:32:14,263
SO HE THOUGHT IT WOULD BE BEST
IF WE TOLD YOU.
606
00:32:17,466 --> 00:32:18,707
(whispers) WOW.
607
00:32:20,369 --> 00:32:22,411
IF YOU'D LIKE,
WE COULD GIVE YOU A MOMENT.
608
00:32:22,411 --> 00:32:24,974
NO.
609
00:32:26,415 --> 00:32:28,017
I'M OKAY.
610
00:32:29,548 --> 00:32:32,681
WELL, I HAVE A CLASS.
611
00:32:35,985 --> 00:32:38,227
UH, I'M SURE THE SCHOOL
WILL UNDERSTAND
612
00:32:38,227 --> 00:32:40,229
IF YOU NEED
TO MISS A FEW DAYS.
613
00:32:40,229 --> 00:32:42,061
I DON'T NEED TO DO THAT.
614
00:32:42,061 --> 00:32:45,264
I MEAN, I'M SORRY SHE'S DEAD,
BUT WE WEREN'T VERY CLOSE.
615
00:32:45,264 --> 00:32:47,466
STILL, SHE WAS YOUR MOTHER.
616
00:32:47,466 --> 00:32:49,468
TECHNICALLY.
617
00:32:49,468 --> 00:32:51,540
BUT NOT A VERY GOOD ONE.
618
00:32:51,540 --> 00:32:54,303
LOOK, TRAVERS,
WE'RE ALL MOMS HERE.
619
00:32:54,303 --> 00:32:56,305
WE'VE ALL MADE MISTAKES
WITH OUR KIDS,
620
00:32:56,305 --> 00:32:58,407
AND WHAT WE COUNT ON IS
WHEN THEY GROW UP,
621
00:32:58,407 --> 00:33:02,451
THEY'LL FORGIVE US.
MY MOM DIDN'T EVEN TRY
TO RAISE ME.
622
00:33:02,451 --> 00:33:06,215
I MEAN, SHE JUST HANDED ME
TO MY FATHER AND WALKED AWAY.
623
00:33:06,215 --> 00:33:08,987
HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME
TO FORGIVE THAT?
624
00:33:08,987 --> 00:33:10,519
LOOK, I'M SORRY.
625
00:33:10,519 --> 00:33:14,463
I DON'T MEAN TO BE RUDE,
BUT I'M GONNA BE LATE.
626
00:33:14,463 --> 00:33:16,365
HEY! HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY.
WAIT A SECOND.
627
00:33:16,365 --> 00:33:19,428
TRAVERS, YOU NEED TO KNOW
SOMETHING ABOUT YOUR MOM,
628
00:33:19,428 --> 00:33:22,631
AND I'M GONNA TELL YOU.
NOW SIT DOWN.
629
00:33:22,631 --> 00:33:25,334
(Karen) I'D ONLY KNOWN YOUR MOM
ABOUT A YEAR
630
00:33:25,334 --> 00:33:28,377
WHEN SHE CAME OVER TO MY HOUSE
THIS ONE DAY.
631
00:33:28,377 --> 00:33:29,778
(door opens)
632
00:33:29,778 --> 00:33:33,582
HEY, KAREN!
YOUR PORCH LIGHT'S ON.
633
00:33:36,185 --> 00:33:38,347
WHOA. SITTING IN YOUR BATHROBE
DRINKING,
634
00:33:38,347 --> 00:33:40,349
AND YOU DIDN'T CALL ME?
635
00:33:40,349 --> 00:33:44,523
I KINDA WANTED TO BE ALONE.
636
00:33:44,523 --> 00:33:46,355
WHY?
637
00:33:49,027 --> 00:33:51,400
IT'S THE ANNIVERSARY
OF MY SON'S DEATH.
638
00:33:51,400 --> 00:33:53,562
OHH.
639
00:33:53,562 --> 00:33:56,205
(clicks tongue)
640
00:33:56,205 --> 00:33:57,666
I'M SORRY.
641
00:33:57,666 --> 00:34:00,469
EVERY YEAR
I THINK IT'LL GET EASIER,
642
00:34:00,469 --> 00:34:02,511
AND IT NEVER DOES.
643
00:34:04,713 --> 00:34:07,076
NOTHING WORSE
THAN LOSING A CHILD.
644
00:34:09,478 --> 00:34:13,122
IN A WAY, YOU'RE KINDA LUCKY
YOU DON'T HAVE ANY.
645
00:34:13,122 --> 00:34:15,424
ACTUALLY, I DO.
646
00:34:15,424 --> 00:34:17,526
WHAT?
647
00:34:17,526 --> 00:34:19,528
MM, I HAVE A SON.
648
00:34:21,390 --> 00:34:24,793
YOU LIVED HERE A YEAR.
HOW DO I NOT KNOW THIS?
649
00:34:24,793 --> 00:34:27,065
BECAUSE HE LIVES
WITH HIS FATHER.
650
00:34:27,065 --> 00:34:30,399
WHEN I GOT DIVORCED,
I GAVE HIM FULL CUSTODY,
651
00:34:30,399 --> 00:34:32,501
SO I KINDA KNOW
HOW YOU FEEL.
652
00:34:34,243 --> 00:34:38,076
I MEAN,
WE'VE BOTH LOST KIDS.
653
00:34:38,076 --> 00:34:40,809
NO.
654
00:34:40,809 --> 00:34:42,511
I LOST A KID.
655
00:34:42,511 --> 00:34:44,453
YOU GAVE YOURS AWAY.
656
00:34:44,453 --> 00:34:47,756
AND YOU HAVE THE NERVE
TO TELL ME YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL?
657
00:34:47,756 --> 00:34:50,419
I GAVE HIM UP BECAUSE
I WANTED TO PROTECT HIM.
658
00:34:50,419 --> 00:34:52,291
FROM WHO?
659
00:34:52,291 --> 00:34:53,622
FROM ME.
660
00:34:53,622 --> 00:34:57,266
YOU KNOW, I TRIED TO BE
A GOOD MOM. I REALLY DID.
661
00:34:57,266 --> 00:34:59,698
BUT I KNOW MYSELF.
662
00:34:59,698 --> 00:35:01,600
AND IF HE...
663
00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:03,672
IF HE WAS
GONNA GROW UP NORMAL,
664
00:35:03,672 --> 00:35:05,804
HE NEEDED TO GET AWAY
FROM ME.
665
00:35:05,804 --> 00:35:07,406
WHAT A COP-OUT.
666
00:35:07,406 --> 00:35:09,678
I THINK
YOU'RE JUST BEING SELFISH.
667
00:35:09,678 --> 00:35:11,640
YOU KNOW, TRUST ME, KAREN,
668
00:35:11,640 --> 00:35:13,642
THERE IS NOTHING
THAT YOU COULD SAY
669
00:35:13,642 --> 00:35:16,645
TO MAKE ME THINK LESS
ABOUT MYSELF THAN I ALREADY DO.
670
00:35:16,645 --> 00:35:20,549
BUT IF IT GIVES HIM
A CHANCE, IT'S WORTH IT.
671
00:35:20,549 --> 00:35:23,792
AREN'T YOU AFRAID
HE'S GONNA HATE YOU?
672
00:35:25,554 --> 00:35:29,358
I LOVE HIM ENOUGH
TO LET HIM HATE ME.
673
00:35:31,730 --> 00:35:34,403
(sighs deeply)
674
00:35:34,403 --> 00:35:35,834
(opens bottle)
675
00:35:35,834 --> 00:35:38,637
(liquid pouring)
676
00:35:41,570 --> 00:35:44,543
WELL, I HOPE YOU'RE NOT
MAKING A BIG MISTAKE.
677
00:35:54,483 --> 00:35:56,255
WELL...
678
00:35:56,255 --> 00:35:57,756
ME, TOO.
679
00:36:01,430 --> 00:36:05,464
SO I'M NOT DEFENDING
EVERYTHING SHE DID, TRAVERS,
680
00:36:05,464 --> 00:36:08,697
BUT YOU HAVE TO KNOW,
SHE LOVED YOU,
681
00:36:08,697 --> 00:36:11,900
MORE THAN YOU CAN IMAGINE.
682
00:36:14,303 --> 00:36:16,675
(voice breaks) I REALLY NEED
TO GET TO CLASS.
683
00:36:23,312 --> 00:36:26,585
(indistinct conversations)
684
00:36:26,585 --> 00:36:29,588
BUP, BUP, BUP.
I BELIEVE I CALLED SHOTGUN.
685
00:36:29,588 --> 00:36:31,590
GOD,
SHE IS SO GOOD AT THAT.
686
00:36:31,590 --> 00:36:33,592
SHE SHOULD BE.
SHE'S BEEN DOING IT
687
00:36:33,592 --> 00:36:36,825
SINCE SHE RODE SHOTGUN
ON AN ACTUAL STAGECOACH.
HEY. HEY.
688
00:36:39,498 --> 00:36:42,401
I REALIZED...
I NEVER THANKED YOU
689
00:36:42,401 --> 00:36:45,574
FOR COMING ALL THE WAY OUT HERE
JUST TO TELL ME.
690
00:36:45,574 --> 00:36:48,337
THAT WAS REALLY COOL OF YOU.
691
00:36:48,337 --> 00:36:51,510
WE FELT WE OWED IT
TO YOUR MOM.
692
00:36:51,510 --> 00:36:53,312
OH, MY GOD.
I CAN'T BELIEVE WE FORGOT.
693
00:36:53,312 --> 00:36:54,683
WHAT?
694
00:36:59,418 --> 00:37:01,290
WE, UH...
695
00:37:01,290 --> 00:37:04,423
ALSO CAME TO GIVE YOU
YOUR MOM'S ASHES.
696
00:37:08,357 --> 00:37:11,500
WE THOUGHT YOU MIGHT
WANNA SCATTER THEM SOMEWHERE.
697
00:37:14,963 --> 00:37:17,736
UNLESS THAT'S A LITTLE...
698
00:37:17,736 --> 00:37:20,439
WEIRD FOR YOU.
699
00:37:22,571 --> 00:37:24,443
WHY DON'T YOU GUYS TAKE 'EM?
700
00:37:26,275 --> 00:37:29,448
ARE YOU SURE?
701
00:37:29,448 --> 00:37:32,020
YEAH.
702
00:37:32,020 --> 00:37:34,823
YOU WERE HER BEST FRIENDS.
703
00:37:36,525 --> 00:37:39,988
I'M SURE YOU COULD THINK
OF THE PERFECT PLACE TO PUT HER.
704
00:37:56,905 --> 00:37:59,578
OKAY, WE'RE HERE.
705
00:37:59,578 --> 00:38:01,780
GUYS...
(singsong voice) WAKE UP.
706
00:38:01,780 --> 00:38:04,913
(normal voice) GUYS?
707
00:38:04,913 --> 00:38:06,555
(honks horn twice)
708
00:38:06,555 --> 00:38:09,488
(singsong voice)
WE'RE HOME. GET OUT.
709
00:38:09,488 --> 00:38:11,990
LORD, LYNETTE. YOU NEARLY
GAVE ME A HEART ATTACK.
710
00:38:11,990 --> 00:38:14,993
YEAH, I'D LIKE TO SEE EDIE
AGAIN, BUT NOT TONIGHT.
711
00:38:14,993 --> 00:38:16,995
OH, I THINK MY LEG'S ASLEEP.
712
00:38:16,995 --> 00:38:19,498
ACTUALLY, THAT'S MY LEG.
GET YOUR HAND OFF.
713
00:38:21,029 --> 00:38:23,532
LYNETTE, THANK YOU AGAIN
FOR DRIVING.
714
00:38:23,532 --> 00:38:25,634
YOU BET.
HOLD IT.
715
00:38:25,634 --> 00:38:28,977
WE STILL GOTTA FIGURE OUT WHERE
WE'RE GONNA SPREAD THE ASHES.
716
00:38:28,977 --> 00:38:30,539
(groans)
717
00:38:30,539 --> 00:38:33,682
NOW IT'S GOTTA BE SOMEPLACE
THAT WAS MEANINGFUL TO EDIE.
718
00:38:33,682 --> 00:38:37,846
(sighs)
WELL, EDIE ONCE TOLD ME SHE LOST
HER VIRGINITY IN A COW PASTURE.
719
00:38:37,846 --> 00:38:39,848
IF WE CAN
FIND THAT EXACT FIELD...
720
00:38:39,848 --> 00:38:42,391
WE'D FIND A LOT
OF TRAUMATIZED COWS.
721
00:38:42,391 --> 00:38:44,523
(all chuckle)
722
00:38:44,523 --> 00:38:46,825
DO WE REALLY NEED TO DO
THIS TONIGHT? THEY'RE ASHES.
723
00:38:46,825 --> 00:38:49,458
IT'S NOT LIKE
THEY'RE GONNA GO BAD.
724
00:38:49,458 --> 00:38:50,899
FINE. WE'LL TALK TOMORROW.
725
00:39:05,073 --> 00:39:06,545
(sighs)
726
00:39:06,545 --> 00:39:10,018
OH, EDIE, WHAT ARE
WE GONNA DO WITH YOU?
727
00:39:10,018 --> 00:39:13,752
(wind blowing loudly)
728
00:39:46,555 --> 00:39:48,987
SUBTLE AS ALWAYS, I SEE.
729
00:39:55,864 --> 00:39:58,096
(door creaks)
730
00:40:01,730 --> 00:40:04,102
THIS WAS A WONDERFUL IDEA,
KAREN.
731
00:40:04,102 --> 00:40:07,536
IT WASN'T EXACTLY MINE. NOW BE
CAREFUL. YOU'RE SPILLING EDIE.
732
00:40:07,536 --> 00:40:10,479
URN IS EMPTY.
733
00:40:10,479 --> 00:40:11,780
LET'S DO IT.
734
00:40:11,780 --> 00:40:14,082
SHOULDN'T WE SAY SOMETHING
FIRST?
735
00:40:14,082 --> 00:40:16,014
LIKE WHAT?
736
00:40:16,014 --> 00:40:17,986
I DON'T KNOW.
737
00:40:17,986 --> 00:40:20,889
A FEW WORDS DESCRIBING
HOW WE FELT ABOUT HER?
738
00:40:20,889 --> 00:40:23,522
I DON'T THINK EDIE WOULD WANT US
TO GET ALL SAPPY.
739
00:40:23,522 --> 00:40:26,525
WELL, I THINK IF WE'RE QUICK
ABOUT IT, SHE'D BE FINE.
MM.
740
00:40:26,525 --> 00:40:28,026
HERE'S A THOUGHT--
741
00:40:28,026 --> 00:40:31,460
WE ALL SAY ONE WORD THAT SUMS UP
WHAT WE THOUGHT OF HER.
742
00:40:31,460 --> 00:40:35,203
AND THEN WE DUMP HER?
THEN WE DUMP HER.
743
00:40:35,203 --> 00:40:38,106
JUST ONE WORD. THIS IS HARD.
744
00:40:38,106 --> 00:40:39,207
MM.
745
00:40:39,207 --> 00:40:41,570
OKAY, I GOT ONE.
I'LL GO FIRST.
746
00:40:41,570 --> 00:40:45,574
EDIE BRITT WAS SEXY.
747
00:40:45,574 --> 00:40:47,175
PERCEPTIVE.
748
00:40:47,175 --> 00:40:50,018
STRONG.
749
00:40:50,018 --> 00:40:52,551
BEAUTIFUL.
MM-HMM.
750
00:40:54,783 --> 00:40:56,485
I NEED FOUR WORDS.
751
00:40:56,485 --> 00:40:58,086
AY.
(groans)
752
00:40:58,086 --> 00:41:01,159
OKAY. I WANT TO DO EDIE JUSTICE,
AND FOR THAT TO HAPPEN,
753
00:41:01,159 --> 00:41:05,534
I NEED FOUR WORDS, OKAY?
EDIE WOULD SO NOT BE SURPRISED
YOU'RE RUINING THIS MOMENT.
754
00:41:05,534 --> 00:41:08,797
GO AHEAD, SUSAN. WHAT ARE
YOUR FOUR WORDS FOR EDIE?
755
00:41:08,797 --> 00:41:12,641
ONE OF A KIND.
756
00:41:12,641 --> 00:41:13,642
(chuckles)
757
00:41:17,576 --> 00:41:20,248
(sighs) NOW IT'S TIME.
758
00:41:22,981 --> 00:41:24,653
(Edie) AND THAT IS
759
00:41:24,653 --> 00:41:28,056
HOW WISTERIA LANE CAME TO BE
MY FINAL RESTING PLACE.
760
00:41:31,119 --> 00:41:35,023
MY ASHES WERE SPREAD OVER GRASS
I HAD ONCE WALKED ON...
761
00:41:38,226 --> 00:41:41,930
BENEATH TREES THAT HAD
ONCE GIVEN ME SHADE...
762
00:41:44,573 --> 00:41:48,807
ON TOP OF ROSES
I ONCE ADMIRED...
763
00:41:50,879 --> 00:41:55,814
AND BESIDE FENCES
I ONCE GOSSIPED OVER.
764
00:41:55,814 --> 00:41:59,517
AND AFTER MY FRIENDS HAD
FINISHED SAYING GOOD-BYE,
765
00:41:59,517 --> 00:42:04,753
A WIND CAME ALONG AND TOOK WHAT
WAS LEFT OF ME INTO THE AIR.
766
00:42:04,753 --> 00:42:06,595
(wind blowing)
767
00:42:06,595 --> 00:42:09,097
AS I LOOKED DOWN ON THE WORLD,
768
00:42:09,097 --> 00:42:11,960
I BEGAN TO LET GO OF IT.
769
00:42:11,960 --> 00:42:14,663
I LET GO OF WHITE PICKET FENCES
770
00:42:14,663 --> 00:42:17,305
AND CARS IN DRIVEWAYS,
771
00:42:17,305 --> 00:42:21,069
COFFEE CUPS
AND VACUUM CLEANERS.
772
00:42:21,069 --> 00:42:24,973
I LET GO OF ALL THOSE THINGS
WHICH SEEM SO ORDINARY,
773
00:42:24,973 --> 00:42:28,717
BUT WHEN YOU PUT THEM TOGETHER,
THEY MAKE UP A LIFE...
774
00:42:28,717 --> 00:42:33,882
A LIFE
THAT REALLY WAS ONE OF A KIND.
775
00:42:33,882 --> 00:42:35,584
I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING--
776
00:42:35,584 --> 00:42:39,658
IT'S NOT HARD TO DIE
WHEN YOU KNOW YOU HAVE LIVED,
777
00:42:39,658 --> 00:42:41,690
AND I DID.
778
00:42:41,690 --> 00:42:44,733
OH, HOW I LIVED.
56318
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