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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,701 --> 00:00:02,173 PREVIOUSLY ON... 2 00:00:02,173 --> 00:00:04,105 DAVE GOT CAUGHT. 3 00:00:04,105 --> 00:00:06,037 YOU CHANGED YOUR NAME AND YOU'RE LIVING IN FAIRVIEW. 4 00:00:06,037 --> 00:00:08,179 IT'S NOT HEALTHY OR SAFE. 5 00:00:08,179 --> 00:00:09,640 GABY GOT LEVERAGE. 6 00:00:09,640 --> 00:00:11,682 (Carlos) I'M GETTING THAT BONUS AFTER ALL. 7 00:00:11,682 --> 00:00:14,785 SO, BRAD, WHAT SORT OF BONUS ARE WE LOOKING AT? 8 00:00:14,785 --> 00:00:17,088 KATHERINE DROPPED A BOMB. MIKE'S MOVING IN HERE. 9 00:00:17,088 --> 00:00:19,290 WHAT? TOM CALLED IT QUITS. 10 00:00:19,290 --> 00:00:21,122 IF WE'RE GONNA SELL THIS PLACE, 11 00:00:21,122 --> 00:00:25,496 WE SHOULD PROBABLY KNOW EXACTLY HOW MUCH IT'S WORTH. AND BREE GOT HONEST... 12 00:00:25,496 --> 00:00:28,329 YOU'RE PAID BASED ON YOUR CONTRIBUTION. YOU'RE SAYING I'M WORTHLESS. 13 00:00:28,329 --> 00:00:31,432 NO, I'M JUST SAYING YOU'RE WORTH... LESS. 14 00:00:31,432 --> 00:00:34,605 WHICH RESULTED IN SOME STRANGE BEHAVIOR. 15 00:00:41,112 --> 00:00:43,644 (Mary Alice) EVERYONE WHO MET ORSON HODGE 16 00:00:43,644 --> 00:00:47,478 KNEW HE BELIEVED IN BEING POLITE. 17 00:00:47,478 --> 00:00:50,481 HE GREETED HIS NEIGHBORS EACH DAY WITH A SUNNY... 18 00:00:50,481 --> 00:00:53,454 GOOD MORNING. 19 00:00:53,454 --> 00:00:56,387 HE OPENED DOORS FOR YOUNG WOMEN WITH A GALLANT... 20 00:00:56,387 --> 00:00:58,129 ALLOW ME. 21 00:01:00,161 --> 00:01:03,164 IF HE BUMPED INTO A STRANGER ON THE STREET... OH! 22 00:01:03,164 --> 00:01:06,537 HE'D CHEERFULLY SAY... I BEG YOUR PARDON. 23 00:01:06,537 --> 00:01:11,142 AND IF ONE OF HIS FRIENDS WAS HAVING A HARD TIME, 24 00:01:11,142 --> 00:01:14,575 ORSON WAS THE FIRST TO SAY... YOU NEED SOME HELP THERE? 25 00:01:14,575 --> 00:01:18,209 WHETHER HIS FRIEND WANTED HIS HELP OR NOT. 26 00:01:18,209 --> 00:01:19,450 ORSON. 27 00:01:19,450 --> 00:01:21,712 WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 28 00:01:21,712 --> 00:01:23,854 WELL, I HEARD ABOUT YOUR GOING OUT OF BUSINESS SALE, 29 00:01:23,854 --> 00:01:26,287 AND I THOUGHT YOU COULD USE A HAND. 30 00:01:26,287 --> 00:01:28,159 I'M GOOD. THANKS. 31 00:01:30,361 --> 00:01:34,225 OH! (chuckles) WOW. THIS IS CHARMING. 32 00:01:34,225 --> 00:01:36,767 OH, IT'S A SALT SHAKER MY GRANDFATHER GAVE ME. 33 00:01:36,767 --> 00:01:39,130 USED TO DISPLAY IT ON THE SHELF. 34 00:01:39,130 --> 00:01:40,871 HOW MUCH YOU WANT FOR IT? 35 00:01:40,871 --> 00:01:42,573 IT'S NOT FOR SALE. 36 00:01:42,573 --> 00:01:45,136 EVERYTHING IN THAT BOX IS STUFF I'M TAKING WITH ME. 37 00:01:45,136 --> 00:01:46,607 OH. OKAY. 38 00:01:46,607 --> 00:01:48,539 JUST TRYING TO HELP OUT. 39 00:01:48,539 --> 00:01:51,242 I KNOW IT'S A DIFFICULT DAY, 40 00:01:51,242 --> 00:01:53,244 AND I THINK I, OF ALL PEOPLE, 41 00:01:53,244 --> 00:01:55,886 UNDERSTAND WHAT IT IS YOU'RE GOING THROUGH. 42 00:01:55,886 --> 00:01:58,619 WHY YOU "OF ALL PEOPLE"? 43 00:01:58,619 --> 00:02:00,691 WELL, I KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE 44 00:02:00,691 --> 00:02:02,823 TO HAVE YOUR LIVELIHOOD SUDDENLY VANISH. 45 00:02:02,823 --> 00:02:04,825 REMEMBER, I USED TO BE A DENTIST. 46 00:02:04,825 --> 00:02:07,198 OH. RIGHT. 47 00:02:07,198 --> 00:02:08,799 RIGHT. 48 00:02:08,799 --> 00:02:13,864 OF COURSE, IT'S NOT REALLY THE SAME, IS IT? 49 00:02:13,864 --> 00:02:17,838 WHAT'S NOT? MY BUSINESS STARTED GOING SOUTH BECAUSE OF A BAD ECONOMY. 50 00:02:17,838 --> 00:02:19,840 IT GOT WORSE WHEN MY SON 51 00:02:19,840 --> 00:02:21,842 WAS ACCUSED OF A CRIME THAT HE DIDN'T COMMIT, 52 00:02:21,842 --> 00:02:24,315 BUT YOU LOST YOUR LICENSE BECAUSE YOU WENT TO PRISON 53 00:02:24,315 --> 00:02:27,318 FOR A CRIME YOU DID COMMIT. 54 00:02:27,318 --> 00:02:29,780 WHY ARE YOU BEING THIS WAY? 55 00:02:29,780 --> 00:02:32,553 BECAUSE WHAT'S HAPPENING TO ME IS UNFAIR. 56 00:02:32,553 --> 00:02:35,356 WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU WAS... JUSTICE? 57 00:02:35,356 --> 00:02:37,358 YEAH, AND TO COMPARE MY SITUATION WITH YOURS, 58 00:02:37,358 --> 00:02:39,360 ON A DAY LIKE THIS, 59 00:02:39,360 --> 00:02:42,363 WELL, I GOTTA TELL YOU, IT'S A LITTLE INSULTING. 60 00:02:42,363 --> 00:02:44,735 THEN I APOLOGIZE. 61 00:02:44,735 --> 00:02:47,238 (sighs) MY INTENTION WAS NEVER TO INSULT YOU. 62 00:02:47,238 --> 00:02:50,371 I WANTED TO SUPPORT YOU IN YOUR--IN YOUR HOUR OF NEED. 63 00:02:50,371 --> 00:02:53,844 UH-HUH. UM, VULTURES ARE STARTING TO ARRIVE. 64 00:02:53,844 --> 00:02:56,247 (chuckles) I'LL LEAVE YOU TO IT, THEN. 65 00:02:56,247 --> 00:02:59,179 (indistinct conversations) 66 00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:02,353 YES, EVERYONE WHO MET ORSON HODGE 67 00:03:02,353 --> 00:03:05,756 KNEW HE BELIEVED IN BEING POLITE. 68 00:03:05,756 --> 00:03:07,918 WHAT THEY DIDN'T KNOW IS 69 00:03:07,918 --> 00:03:10,391 THAT HE ALSO BELIEVED 70 00:03:10,391 --> 00:03:13,193 IN PUNISHING THOSE WHO WEREN'T. 71 00:03:25,606 --> 00:03:27,608 THE DAY AFTER MIKE DELFINO 72 00:03:27,608 --> 00:03:29,710 MOVED IN WITH KATHERINE MAYFAIR, 73 00:03:29,710 --> 00:03:33,884 SHE THOUGHT IT WOULD BE NICE TO SHARE HER HAPPINESS, 74 00:03:33,884 --> 00:03:37,888 SO SHE DECIDED TO THROW A HOUSEWARMING PARTY 75 00:03:37,888 --> 00:03:40,321 FOR HER FRIENDS AND NEIGHBORS. 76 00:03:42,293 --> 00:03:46,957 BUT FROM THE MOMENT THE FIRST INVITATION WAS DELIVERED, 77 00:03:46,957 --> 00:03:50,801 HER FRIENDS BEGAN MAKING ASSUMPTIONS 78 00:03:50,801 --> 00:03:54,805 ABOUT THOSE WHO HAD BEEN INVITED... 79 00:03:54,805 --> 00:03:56,937 AND ABOUT THOSE WHO HADN'T. 80 00:03:56,937 --> 00:04:00,010 I KNOW IT'S LATE NOTICE, BUT I DO HOPE 81 00:04:00,010 --> 00:04:03,544 YOU'LL ALL BE ABLE TO MAKE IT. NOW DOES THIS REALLY MEAN NO GIFTS, 82 00:04:03,544 --> 00:04:06,016 OR IS IT LIKE WHEN GABY SAYS "NO GIFTS" 83 00:04:06,016 --> 00:04:09,820 AND SHE MEANS NO CHEAP GIFTS? YOU KNOW, KATHERINE, IF YOU NEED ANY HELP, 84 00:04:09,820 --> 00:04:12,553 I WOULD BE HAPPY TO MAKE MY FAM-- SHH! 85 00:04:12,553 --> 00:04:16,026 HEY, GUYS. WHAT ARE WE TALKING ABOUT? 86 00:04:16,026 --> 00:04:18,789 THE FEDERAL DEFICIT. 87 00:04:18,789 --> 00:04:21,031 WHOO! THAT SUCKER'S BIG! 88 00:04:22,533 --> 00:04:26,697 ACTUALLY, SUSAN, WE WERE TALKING ABOUT MY HOUSEWARMING PARTY. 89 00:04:26,697 --> 00:04:30,471 OH, YEAH. I'M SO EXCITED. YOU GOT MY R.S.V.P., RIGHT? 90 00:04:30,471 --> 00:04:33,304 YES. I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE COMING. OH, UM, BY THE WAY, 91 00:04:33,304 --> 00:04:36,707 CAN YOU BRING YOUR BLUE PUNCH BOWL? ABSOLUTELY. ANYTHING ELSE YOU NEED? 92 00:04:36,707 --> 00:04:39,310 WHOA, WHOA, WHOA. WHAT'S HAPPENING HERE? 93 00:04:39,310 --> 00:04:41,512 WHY ISN'T HAIR BEING PULLED? 94 00:04:41,512 --> 00:04:43,484 WHY WOULD WE DO THAT? 95 00:04:43,484 --> 00:04:46,317 UM, LET'S SEE. SHE'S SHACKING UP WITH YOUR EX? 96 00:04:46,317 --> 00:04:49,320 SOMETHING WHICH, WHEN I DO IT, I GET AN ANGRY MOB 97 00:04:49,320 --> 00:04:52,393 ON MY FRONT LAWN. I MEAN, LET'S BE HONEST, SUSAN. 98 00:04:52,393 --> 00:04:54,395 YOU WEREN'T EXACTLY OVER THE MOON 99 00:04:54,395 --> 00:04:57,998 WHEN YOU HEARD THEY WERE GONNA LIVE TOGETHER. WELL, YES, I WAS UPSET AT FIRST. 100 00:04:57,998 --> 00:05:01,932 BUT, YOU KNOW, MIKE WAS GONNA BE WITH SOMEONE EVENTUALLY, 101 00:05:01,932 --> 00:05:04,805 AND I CONSIDER MYSELF LUCKY THAT IT WAS SOMEONE, WHO, 102 00:05:04,805 --> 00:05:08,308 AFTER ALL IS SAID AND DONE, HAS ALWAYS BEEN MY TRUE FRIEND. 103 00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:10,711 SUSAN, THAT'S VERY SWEET. 104 00:05:10,711 --> 00:05:12,042 AND ADMIRABLE. 105 00:05:12,042 --> 00:05:14,815 AND ABNORMAL. 106 00:05:14,815 --> 00:05:17,918 HEY, GABY, REMEMBER WHEN I WAS WITH CARLOS? SHUT IT, BITCH. 107 00:05:17,918 --> 00:05:20,991 SEE? THAT'S NORMAL. 108 00:05:20,991 --> 00:05:23,994 (indistinct conversations) 109 00:05:28,699 --> 00:05:31,962 I'LL GIVE YOU... $6,000 FOR IT. 110 00:05:31,962 --> 00:05:34,034 WHAT? IT'S A $12,000 OVEN. 111 00:05:34,034 --> 00:05:36,036 THERE'S A DENT IN THE DOOR. 112 00:05:36,036 --> 00:05:38,909 NOT A DENT. A FIST PRINT. 113 00:05:38,909 --> 00:05:41,442 MY HUSBAND'S BEEN A LITTLE FRUSTRATED LATELY. 114 00:05:41,442 --> 00:05:42,943 ON THE PLUS SIDE, 115 00:05:42,943 --> 00:05:45,075 IT MATCHES THE SHOE PRINT ON THE DISHWASHER. 116 00:05:45,075 --> 00:05:47,478 (chuckles) $6,200--TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT. 117 00:05:47,478 --> 00:05:49,950 (sighs, under breath) YI, YI, YI, YI. 118 00:05:49,950 --> 00:05:51,822 (normal voice) FINE. CONGRATULATIONS. 119 00:05:51,822 --> 00:05:54,755 YOU JUST STOLE A PIZZA OVEN. 120 00:05:54,755 --> 00:05:57,858 HEY. HEY. I GOT $6,200 FOR THE OVEN. 121 00:05:57,858 --> 00:05:59,860 WHAT?! THAT GUY IS RIPPING US OFF. 122 00:05:59,860 --> 00:06:02,062 YEAH, WELL, PUTTING AN "EVERYTHING MUST GO" SIGN 123 00:06:02,062 --> 00:06:04,765 KIND OF ERODED OUR BARGAINING POSITION. 124 00:06:04,765 --> 00:06:06,767 HOW ARE WE DOING ON THE OTHER STUFF? 125 00:06:06,767 --> 00:06:08,769 WELL, BY THE END OF THE DAY, 126 00:06:08,769 --> 00:06:11,101 WE SHOULD BE ABLE TO PAY OFF OUR CREDITORS, 127 00:06:11,101 --> 00:06:14,104 GIVE BREE BACK THE $20,000 THAT WE OWE HER 128 00:06:14,104 --> 00:06:16,477 AND HAVE ENOUGH TO LIVE ON FOR... 129 00:06:16,477 --> 00:06:18,148 45 MINUTES. 130 00:06:18,148 --> 00:06:21,151 FORGET I ASKED. I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT NOW. OHH. 131 00:06:21,151 --> 00:06:24,815 JUST... LOOK, I KNOW THIS IS A CRAPPY DAY FOR YOU, 132 00:06:24,815 --> 00:06:26,817 BUT WE NEED TO START THINKING 133 00:06:26,817 --> 00:06:30,661 ABOUT WHAT OUR PLANS ARE GOING TO BE. I TOLD YOU, I'M GONNA GET A JOB. 134 00:06:30,661 --> 00:06:32,663 AND THAT IS SO GREAT. (sighs) 135 00:06:32,663 --> 00:06:35,666 SO WHEN DO YOU THINK THAT GREAT THING MIGHT HAPPEN? LYNETTE, DON'T. 136 00:06:35,666 --> 00:06:39,570 IT'S TAKEN EVERYTHING I GOT NOT TO LOSE IT RIGHT NOW. (whispers) SORRY. 137 00:06:39,570 --> 00:06:41,532 YOU HONESTLY THINK YOU'RE GONNA GET $200 138 00:06:41,532 --> 00:06:43,804 FOR THAT CAPPUCCINO MACHINE? I'LL GIVE YOU $50. 139 00:06:43,804 --> 00:06:48,008 50 BUCKS?! ARE YOU-- YOU--AH. HEY. 140 00:06:48,008 --> 00:06:51,081 I THINK YOU BETTER STOP WITH THE BARGAIN HUNTING 141 00:06:51,081 --> 00:06:53,083 UNLESS YOU WANT YOUR FACE 142 00:06:53,083 --> 00:06:55,746 TO MATCH THE OVEN AND THE DISHWASHER. 143 00:06:57,748 --> 00:07:00,991 HEY, GUYS! 144 00:07:00,991 --> 00:07:02,993 (lowered voice) WHAT THE HELL ARE THEY DOING HERE? 145 00:07:02,993 --> 00:07:04,995 THEY HAD THEATER TICKETS, AND THEIR SITTER CANCELED. 146 00:07:04,995 --> 00:07:07,998 WE'RE ONLY GONNA WATCH THEIR KIDS FOR A COUPLE HOURS. GOOD IDEA, GABY. 147 00:07:07,998 --> 00:07:10,130 WE'RE HELPING THE SLIMEBALL CHEAT ON HIS WIFE. 148 00:07:10,130 --> 00:07:12,463 WHY NOT BABYSIT FOR HIM, TOO? SHH. HI! 149 00:07:12,463 --> 00:07:14,965 OH, YOU GUYS ARE ANGELS FOR DOING THIS. 150 00:07:14,965 --> 00:07:17,908 WELL, WHAT ARE FRIENDS FOR? SPEAKING OF WHICH, 151 00:07:17,908 --> 00:07:20,110 THANKS FOR HOOKING BRAD UP WITH HIS NEW GIRL. 152 00:07:20,110 --> 00:07:22,442 UH, SHAYLA, RIGHT? 153 00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:24,915 YOU KNOW, THAT HAIRSTYLIST YOU RECOMMENDED-- 154 00:07:24,915 --> 00:07:27,147 UH, I WAS AT THE MALL MAKING AN APPOINTMENT, 155 00:07:27,147 --> 00:07:29,149 AND MARIA WALKED BY. 156 00:07:29,149 --> 00:07:33,123 OH, THAT SHAYLA. (chuckles) HOW MANY SHAYLAS DO YOU KNOW? (chuckles) 157 00:07:33,123 --> 00:07:34,825 TWO. TWO. 158 00:07:34,825 --> 00:07:36,827 THERE'S, UH, SHAYLA THE HAIRSTYLIST 159 00:07:36,827 --> 00:07:38,989 AND THEN THERE'S THIS OTHER SHAYLA I KNOW 160 00:07:38,989 --> 00:07:41,862 WHO'S A HOME-WRECKING WHORE. 161 00:07:41,862 --> 00:07:44,865 HEY, CARLOS. UH, WHY DON'T YOU TAKE, UH, MARIA AND THE KIDS 162 00:07:44,865 --> 00:07:47,868 INSIDE AND INTRODUCE THEM TO THE GIRLS? COME ON, GUYS. 163 00:07:47,868 --> 00:07:49,640 COME ON IN. ALL RIGHT. LET'S GO. 164 00:07:52,102 --> 00:07:54,945 YOU'RE USING ME AS AN ALIBI NOW? 165 00:07:54,945 --> 00:07:57,508 I PAID YOU 30 GRAND. I WANT MY MONEY'S WORTH. 166 00:07:57,508 --> 00:08:00,681 AND BY THE WAY, YOUR TENNIS GAME WITH MARIA TOMORROW-- 167 00:08:00,681 --> 00:08:04,054 YOU NEED TO MOVE IT TO NOON. WHY? SO YOU CAN GO GET ANOTHER "HAIRCUT"? 168 00:08:04,054 --> 00:08:06,517 SHAYLA'S GOT A COUPLE HOURS OFF, 169 00:08:06,517 --> 00:08:09,520 AND I WANT TO SPEND 'EM WITH HER. WELL, BRADLEY, WE ALL WANT THINGS. 170 00:08:09,520 --> 00:08:11,522 FOR INSTANCE, I WOULD LIKE CARLOS 171 00:08:11,522 --> 00:08:15,065 TO HAVE A WEEK OFF NEXT MONTH. (scoffs) IMPOSSIBLE. IT'S OUR BUSIEST TIME. 172 00:08:15,065 --> 00:08:18,899 COME ON, BRAD. WE DON'T WANT TO BE LATE. 173 00:08:18,899 --> 00:08:22,172 OH, GABY, WE'RE STILL ON FOR TENNIS TOMORROW, RIGHT? 174 00:08:22,172 --> 00:08:23,173 4:00? 175 00:08:23,173 --> 00:08:27,037 4:00? LET ME THINK. UH... 176 00:08:27,037 --> 00:08:29,980 UM... 177 00:08:31,612 --> 00:08:33,213 (mouths words) 178 00:08:33,213 --> 00:08:37,087 ACTUALLY, NOON WOULD BE BETTER FOR ME. COULD YOU DO NOON? 179 00:08:37,087 --> 00:08:40,090 OH, I WAS SUPPOSED TO HAVE LUNCH WITH BRAD. 180 00:08:40,090 --> 00:08:41,552 DO YOU MIND, SWEETIE? 181 00:08:41,552 --> 00:08:43,554 WELL, I WAS REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO IT, 182 00:08:43,554 --> 00:08:45,656 BUT, UH... GO AHEAD. YOU GIRLS HAVE FUN. 183 00:08:45,656 --> 00:08:48,929 (chuckles) LISTEN TO HIM. CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS GUY? 184 00:08:48,929 --> 00:08:51,932 (chuckles) NOPE. HE IS NOT TO BE BELIEVED. 185 00:08:59,169 --> 00:09:01,111 (Bree sighs) 186 00:09:02,813 --> 00:09:04,815 MY, WHAT AN INTERESTING COAT HANGER. 187 00:09:04,815 --> 00:09:06,817 IT'S SHAPED LIKE A SOFA. 188 00:09:06,817 --> 00:09:09,119 PLEASE PUT IT IN THE CLOSET. 189 00:09:09,119 --> 00:09:11,051 SORRY, DARLING. 190 00:09:12,552 --> 00:09:14,154 (hums) 191 00:09:17,628 --> 00:09:19,289 ORSON? 192 00:09:19,289 --> 00:09:23,063 WHY DO YOU HAVE A SALT SHAKER FROM SCAVO'S PIZZERIA? 193 00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:24,865 OH. 194 00:09:24,865 --> 00:09:27,598 I STOPPED BY TO EXPRESS MY SYMPATHIES WITH TOM, 195 00:09:27,598 --> 00:09:29,199 AND I-I REMEMBER L-LOOKING AT IT, 196 00:09:29,199 --> 00:09:32,943 AND I-I GUESS I ABSENTMINDEDLY PUT IT IN MY POCKET. 197 00:09:32,943 --> 00:09:35,075 WELL, TAKE IT BACK NOW. THEY'RE LIQUIDATING, 198 00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:37,177 AND THEY'RE GONNA NEED EVERY PENNY THEY CAN GET. 199 00:09:37,177 --> 00:09:38,078 (Italian accent) MA... 200 00:09:38,078 --> 00:09:40,080 I WANT TO STAY HERE WITH YOU. 201 00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:42,913 ME NO LIKE-A THE SCAVOS SO MUCH-A. 202 00:09:44,314 --> 00:09:45,315 NO? 203 00:09:45,315 --> 00:09:46,316 NO. 204 00:09:46,316 --> 00:09:48,859 (normal voice) OH. VERY WELL. 205 00:09:48,859 --> 00:09:52,022 THOUGH I'M NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO GOING DOWN THERE AGAIN. REALLY? 206 00:09:52,022 --> 00:09:54,865 YES. I ONLY WENT DOWN THERE TO COMMISERATE, 207 00:09:54,865 --> 00:09:58,228 AND HE WAS VERY DISMISSIVE. TOM HAS A LOT ON HIS MIND. I'M SURE HE DIDN'T MEAN IT. 208 00:09:58,228 --> 00:10:02,032 YOU WEREN'T THERE, BREE. HE WAS DOWNRIGHT RUDE. 209 00:10:02,032 --> 00:10:05,135 YOU KNOW, IT WOULD SERVE HIM RIGHT IF I KEPT THIS. 210 00:10:05,135 --> 00:10:06,637 DON'T BE RIDICULOUS. 211 00:10:06,637 --> 00:10:09,139 TOM'S RUDENESS DOES NOT GIVE YOU LICENSE TO STEAL. 212 00:10:09,139 --> 00:10:10,841 RETURN IT IMMEDIATELY. 213 00:10:10,841 --> 00:10:13,183 (Italian accent) MA, YOU-- YOU SUCH A PRETTY GIRL. 214 00:10:13,183 --> 00:10:16,146 I WANNA LIVE-A HERE WITH YOU. MWAH. MWAH. 215 00:10:16,146 --> 00:10:17,748 HMM? 216 00:10:22,653 --> 00:10:23,894 HEY. 217 00:10:23,894 --> 00:10:25,956 OH, GREAT. YOU FOUND THE PUNCH BOWL. 218 00:10:25,956 --> 00:10:27,858 WASHED, CLEANED, READY TO GO. 219 00:10:27,858 --> 00:10:31,101 SORRY ABOUT THE MESS. MIKE'S STILL UNPACKING. 220 00:10:31,101 --> 00:10:34,705 HEY, DID YOU MANAGE TO KEEP THAT ANTLER CHANDELIER OUT OF HERE? 221 00:10:34,705 --> 00:10:36,737 YEAH. THAT WENT RIGHT TO THE GARAGE. 222 00:10:36,737 --> 00:10:38,739 THE TOUGH ONE WAS THE FRAMED TOWEL 223 00:10:38,739 --> 00:10:40,811 WITH SOME FOOTBALL GUY'S SWEAT ON IT. 224 00:10:40,811 --> 00:10:43,343 THAT "FOOTBALL GUY" IS PEYTON MANNING. 225 00:10:43,343 --> 00:10:46,176 YOU WOULD DO WELL TO LEARN THAT NAME. AH. 226 00:10:46,176 --> 00:10:49,820 OH. WOW. 227 00:10:49,820 --> 00:10:52,222 OH, NOW THAT I REALLY LOVE. 228 00:10:52,222 --> 00:10:54,755 I ALMOST COULDN'T BELIEVE HE HAD SOMETHING THAT NICE. 229 00:10:54,755 --> 00:10:57,657 THANK YOU. FOR WHAT? 230 00:10:57,657 --> 00:10:59,790 I PAINTED IT. IT WAS A GIFT FOR HIM. 231 00:10:59,790 --> 00:11:02,192 REALLY? 232 00:11:03,894 --> 00:11:07,137 YOU PAINTED THAT. HE DIDN'T MENTION IT. 233 00:11:07,137 --> 00:11:10,941 YEAH. IT WAS A LITTLE BEACH WE WENT TO FOR OUR HONEYMOON. 234 00:11:10,941 --> 00:11:13,944 UH, I MEAN, YOU KNOW HOW MUCH MIKE LOVES THE OCEAN. 235 00:11:13,944 --> 00:11:16,146 (chuckles) YEAH. 236 00:11:16,146 --> 00:11:19,850 NOW I CAN SEE IT EVERY DAY. 237 00:11:19,850 --> 00:11:21,982 ANYWAY, UM, CAN'T WAIT FOR THE PARTY. 238 00:11:21,982 --> 00:11:24,214 IT'S GONNA BE FUN. (laughs) 239 00:11:24,214 --> 00:11:26,056 YEP. 240 00:11:42,773 --> 00:11:44,204 (sighs) 241 00:11:44,204 --> 00:11:46,907 I'M SORRY YOU HAVE TO GO THROUGH THIS. IT MUST BE SO HARD. 242 00:11:46,907 --> 00:11:49,910 THE HARD PART WAS WHEN MY FRIEND TRIED TO HELP ME WITH A LOAN, 243 00:11:49,910 --> 00:11:52,242 AND I THANKED HER BY BECOMING A LUNATIC 244 00:11:52,242 --> 00:11:53,784 AND DENTING HER CAR. 245 00:11:53,784 --> 00:11:55,786 NOW THAT YOU BROUGHT IT UP, 246 00:11:55,786 --> 00:11:58,248 LYNETTE, I'VE BEEN FEELING JUST AWFUL ABOUT THE WAY 247 00:11:58,248 --> 00:12:00,250 I TOOK OVER YOUR RESTAURANT AND INSULTED YOU 248 00:12:00,250 --> 00:12:02,452 AND... (sighs) WHAT CAN I SAY? 249 00:12:02,452 --> 00:12:04,454 I THINK WE HAVE THE KIND OF FRIENDSHIP 250 00:12:04,454 --> 00:12:06,456 WHERE YOU DON'T HAVE TO SAY ANYTHING. 251 00:12:06,456 --> 00:12:09,299 LET'S JUST HUG AND MOVE ON. 252 00:12:09,299 --> 00:12:12,102 OKAY? (laughs) (laughs) 253 00:12:12,102 --> 00:12:16,336 OH. HOW'S TOM HOLDING UP? 254 00:12:16,336 --> 00:12:18,238 HE'S DOING GREAT. 255 00:12:20,440 --> 00:12:22,112 ISN'T IT NOON? 256 00:12:22,112 --> 00:12:24,144 YEAH. HE'S UP EARLY TODAY. 257 00:12:26,176 --> 00:12:29,249 HE JUST DOESN'T KNOW WHAT HE'S DOING NEXT. 258 00:12:29,249 --> 00:12:31,251 (sighs) MAYBE I CAN HELP. 259 00:12:31,251 --> 00:12:34,254 MY PUBLISHER IS THINKING ABOUT DOING HIS ADVERTISING IN-HOUSE, 260 00:12:34,254 --> 00:12:36,486 AND HE'S BEEN LOOKING FOR SOMEONE. 261 00:12:36,486 --> 00:12:38,358 SERIOUSLY? YEAH. 262 00:12:38,358 --> 00:12:40,360 OH, MY GOD. THAT WOULD BE GREAT. 263 00:12:40,360 --> 00:12:43,263 AND IF HE GETS THE JOB, YOU CAN ACTUALLY CASH THE CHECK. 264 00:12:43,263 --> 00:12:44,965 I TELL YOU WHAT. 265 00:12:44,965 --> 00:12:46,967 I WILL INVITE BRUCE OVER FOR DINNER, 266 00:12:46,967 --> 00:12:48,969 YOU AND TOM CAN JOIN US, AND WE'LL TURN IT 267 00:12:48,969 --> 00:12:53,103 INTO A LOW PRESSURE JOB INTERVIEW. THANK YOU. THIS WILL REALLY CHEER TOM UP. 268 00:12:53,103 --> 00:12:56,176 GREAT. I'LL CALL BRUCE THIS AFTERNOON. 269 00:13:00,981 --> 00:13:04,554 (sighs) COULD YOU CALL HIM NOW? 270 00:13:04,554 --> 00:13:07,457 (indistinct conversations) 271 00:13:07,457 --> 00:13:09,419 (clears throat) HEY, MIKE. 272 00:13:09,419 --> 00:13:12,262 OH, I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO ONE OF YOUR WORLD-FAMOUS MARTINIS. 273 00:13:12,262 --> 00:13:14,865 SO WAS MRS. McCLUSKEY. SHE GOT HERE EARLY. 274 00:13:16,426 --> 00:13:19,429 AH. YEAH, BUT DON'T PANIC. I SENT EDIE OUT FOR MORE BOOZE. 275 00:13:19,429 --> 00:13:22,802 AH. SO YOU SENT THE MOUSE TO BUY THE CHEESE. WELL DONE. 276 00:13:22,802 --> 00:13:24,234 WELL, LOOK WHO'S HERE. 277 00:13:24,234 --> 00:13:26,937 SOMEBODY OWES ME $20. HOW ABOUT WE LET IT RIDE? 278 00:13:26,937 --> 00:13:29,539 DOUBLE OR NOTHING--McCLUSKEY SLUGS SOMEONE BY 5:00. 279 00:13:29,539 --> 00:13:32,242 KATHERINE AND I TOLD YOU GUYS WE WERE TAKING THE HIGH ROAD. 280 00:13:32,242 --> 00:13:35,245 WHY WON'T YOU BELIEVE US? BECAUSE I VIVIDLY REMEMBER YESTERDAY, 281 00:13:35,245 --> 00:13:37,217 AND I WASN'T BORN DURING IT. 282 00:13:37,217 --> 00:13:38,919 OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT? 283 00:13:38,919 --> 00:13:41,922 LET ME SHOW YOU SOMETHING I THINK MIGHT CHANGE YOUR MIND. 284 00:13:41,922 --> 00:13:44,224 SO KATHERINE HAS A PICTURE THAT I PAINTED FOR MIKE 285 00:13:44,224 --> 00:13:46,897 HANGING OVER HER MANTELPIECE. DOES SHE KNOW YOU PAINTED IT? 286 00:13:46,897 --> 00:13:49,559 YES, AND WE TALKED ALL ABOUT IT. SHE LOVES IT. 287 00:13:49,559 --> 00:13:51,862 (laughter in distance) 288 00:13:53,433 --> 00:13:55,435 YOU PAINTED THAT? WOW. YOU'RE GOOD. 289 00:13:55,435 --> 00:13:59,209 WHAT? WHERE THE HELL IS IT? BYE-BYE, HIGH ROAD. 290 00:13:59,209 --> 00:14:01,141 WHAT'S WITH THE PUSS? 291 00:14:01,141 --> 00:14:03,043 KATHERINE HUNG ONE OF MIKE'S PAINTINGS OVER THE MANTEL 292 00:14:03,043 --> 00:14:05,976 TILL SHE FOUND OUT SUSAN PAINTED IT. 293 00:14:05,976 --> 00:14:09,279 THEN SHE TOOK IT DOWN. OOH. SOMETHING TELLS ME THIS PARTY'S ABOUT TO GET GOOD. 294 00:14:09,279 --> 00:14:11,351 YOU KNOW, THERE COULD BE 295 00:14:11,351 --> 00:14:14,284 A PERFECTLY INNOCENT EXPLANATION. HEY, KATHY. 296 00:14:14,284 --> 00:14:17,257 WHAT HAPPENED TO SUSAN'S PAINTING? 297 00:14:17,257 --> 00:14:20,260 OH! I AM SUCH A KLUTZ. 298 00:14:20,260 --> 00:14:22,032 I WAS DUSTING YESTERDAY, 299 00:14:22,032 --> 00:14:24,464 AND, WELL, IT JUST FELL. 300 00:14:26,066 --> 00:14:28,068 THE GLASS SHATTERED, AND UGH. 301 00:14:28,068 --> 00:14:31,201 IT TOOK IT TO THE FRAMER. IT'LL BE BACK IN A JIFFY. 302 00:14:31,201 --> 00:14:32,402 MM. 303 00:14:32,402 --> 00:14:34,174 OH! EXCUSE ME. 304 00:14:34,174 --> 00:14:35,605 (sighs) 305 00:14:35,605 --> 00:14:38,979 SEE A PERFECTLY INNOCENT... 306 00:14:38,979 --> 00:14:41,251 BALD-FACED LIE. 307 00:14:41,251 --> 00:14:43,283 IT IS POSSIBLE. 308 00:14:43,283 --> 00:14:45,115 I JUST DRAINED A PITCHER OF MARTINIS. 309 00:14:45,115 --> 00:14:46,987 I'M NOT BUYING IT. 310 00:14:46,987 --> 00:14:48,989 REALLY, SUSAN, THERE'S NOT A WOMAN IN THE WORLD 311 00:14:48,989 --> 00:14:51,992 WHO DOESN'T KNOW WHAT "I BROKE IT DUSTING" MEANS. THAT'S HOW I GOT RID 312 00:14:51,992 --> 00:14:55,295 OF TOM'S LAST BOTTLE OF "MUSK, THE COLOGNE FOR MEN." 313 00:14:55,295 --> 00:14:57,297 ALL RIGHT, YOU GUYS THINK WHAT YOU WANT. 314 00:14:57,297 --> 00:14:59,199 I'M GONNA CHOOSE TO BELIEVE HER. 315 00:15:25,055 --> 00:15:27,157 ALL RIGHT, SO WE HAVE WHISKEY AND BOURBON. 316 00:15:27,157 --> 00:15:29,159 WHAT ELSE DOES MIKE WANT? 317 00:15:29,159 --> 00:15:31,161 BUP, BUP, BUP. WE NEED A SYSTEM. 318 00:15:31,161 --> 00:15:33,163 LET'S START OVER THERE IN SCOTLAND, 319 00:15:33,163 --> 00:15:36,136 HEAD OVER TO RUSSIA AND WORK OUR WAY AROUND THE GLOBE. (laughs) 320 00:15:36,136 --> 00:15:39,139 WOW. IT'S CROWDED IN HERE. THEY'RE ALL BUYING LOTTERY TICKETS. 321 00:15:39,139 --> 00:15:41,211 THE JACKPOT'S $100 MILLION. 322 00:15:41,211 --> 00:15:43,073 LOOK. THERE'S A PRIEST. 323 00:15:43,073 --> 00:15:46,016 I KNEW THAT VOW OF POVERTY WAS A CROCK. 324 00:15:49,419 --> 00:15:51,551 HELLO! 325 00:15:53,323 --> 00:15:55,285 YOU REMEMBER ME. 326 00:15:55,285 --> 00:15:57,027 FATHER DRANCE. 327 00:15:58,558 --> 00:16:01,591 I-I DIDN'T KNOW YOU'D MOVED BACK TO THE AREA. 328 00:16:01,591 --> 00:16:05,335 OH, I JUST REMEMBERED. MIKE WANTS VERMOUTH. 329 00:16:05,335 --> 00:16:07,967 CAN YOU GRAB THAT BEFORE WE FORGET? 330 00:16:07,967 --> 00:16:09,239 SURE. 331 00:16:09,239 --> 00:16:11,041 RIGHT AWAY. 332 00:16:12,342 --> 00:16:15,275 IT'S WONDERFUL TO SEE YOU LOOKING SO WELL. I-- 333 00:16:15,275 --> 00:16:17,347 SHUT UP. 334 00:16:17,347 --> 00:16:20,150 I'M ONLY GONNA SAY THIS ONCE. I'VE MOVED ON. 335 00:16:23,053 --> 00:16:25,055 I'VE REMARRIED, I HAVE A NEW LIFE, 336 00:16:25,055 --> 00:16:28,058 AND THAT'S THE WAY I WANT IT TO STAY--NEW. 337 00:16:28,058 --> 00:16:30,160 OF COURSE. 338 00:16:36,326 --> 00:16:39,129 SO, UH, WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT? 339 00:16:39,129 --> 00:16:42,132 OH. HE SAID WE SAT TOGETHER ONCE ON AN AIRPLANE. 340 00:16:42,132 --> 00:16:44,434 APPARENTLY HE'S LESS MEMORABLE THAN HE THINKS HE IS. 341 00:16:44,434 --> 00:16:47,207 COME ON. I DON'T WANT TO MISS THE PARTY. 342 00:17:01,751 --> 00:17:03,653 (Gabrielle) FINE. 343 00:17:03,653 --> 00:17:06,296 FINE. 344 00:17:06,296 --> 00:17:08,798 FINE. I WILL DO IT, BUT YOU OWE ME. 345 00:17:08,798 --> 00:17:11,061 I GOTTA GO. (beep) 346 00:17:11,061 --> 00:17:13,263 LET ME GUESS. BRAD. 347 00:17:13,263 --> 00:17:16,266 YES, HE WANTS ME TO TAKE MARIA SHOPPING TOMORROW. YEAH, SO HE CAN GRAB A QUICKIE. 348 00:17:16,266 --> 00:17:18,268 YOU KNOW, THIS WHOLE THING IS DISGUSTING. 349 00:17:18,268 --> 00:17:21,271 I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. I KNOW. JUST KEEP REMINDING YOURSELF 350 00:17:21,271 --> 00:17:23,373 THAT WE'RE GETTING THINGS OUT OF IT, TOO. 351 00:17:23,373 --> 00:17:27,277 THINGS I DON'T WANT. THINGS I HAVEN'T EARNED. 352 00:17:27,277 --> 00:17:29,279 NO, I'M GONNA TELL BRADLEY WE'RE OUT. 353 00:17:29,279 --> 00:17:31,281 WHAT? YOU CAN'T DO THAT. 354 00:17:31,281 --> 00:17:34,754 YOU'LL LOSE YOUR JOB AND ALL THAT MONEY. I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE MONEY. 355 00:17:34,754 --> 00:17:36,256 I DO... (slaps chest) 356 00:17:36,256 --> 00:17:39,559 AND SO DOES MY PERSONAL SHOPPER AND PILATES INSTRUCTOR. 357 00:17:39,559 --> 00:17:42,632 GABY, NO. WE'RE DOING THE RIGHT THING. 358 00:17:42,632 --> 00:17:45,735 OR WE CAN... 359 00:17:45,735 --> 00:17:48,138 MAKE SOMEONE ELSE DO THE RIGHT THING. 360 00:17:48,138 --> 00:17:50,240 GABY, WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? 361 00:17:50,240 --> 00:17:52,502 IT MEANS... 362 00:17:52,502 --> 00:17:54,544 TOMORROW I'M GOING TO THE MALL 363 00:17:54,544 --> 00:17:57,547 TO GET MY HAIR CUT BY A SLUT. 364 00:17:57,547 --> 00:18:00,650 (groans) MM. 365 00:18:00,650 --> 00:18:03,483 (indistinct conversations) 366 00:18:05,385 --> 00:18:08,488 HEY. UH, LOOK AT WHAT I FOUND-- MY BEACH PAINTING. (door closes) 367 00:18:08,488 --> 00:18:10,820 OH, YEAH. KATHERINE TOLD ME IT BROKE. 368 00:18:10,820 --> 00:18:12,322 SORRY ABOUT THAT. 369 00:18:12,322 --> 00:18:14,794 YEAH, THAT'S WHAT SHE TOLD ME, TOO, 370 00:18:14,794 --> 00:18:17,627 ONLY, UH, IT DIDN'T. 371 00:18:23,373 --> 00:18:25,305 THAT'S WEIRD. WHY WOULD SHE... 372 00:18:25,305 --> 00:18:27,106 I DON'T KNOW. 373 00:18:27,106 --> 00:18:30,380 SHE SEEMED TO LOVE THE PAINTING... 374 00:18:30,380 --> 00:18:33,783 UNTIL I TOLD HER THAT I PAINTED IT. 375 00:18:35,345 --> 00:18:37,347 EXCUSE ME JUST A MINUTE. 376 00:18:39,189 --> 00:18:40,620 (door opens) 377 00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:43,293 (Mike) I'M NOT MAKING A BIG DEAL. 378 00:18:43,293 --> 00:18:46,296 I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHY YOU LIED. (Katherine) MIKE, PLEASE, NOT NOW. 379 00:18:46,296 --> 00:18:49,559 WE HAVE A HOUSE FULL OF GUESTS. NO, WE'LL TALK ABOUT THIS NOW. 380 00:18:49,559 --> 00:18:52,362 (Lynette) WHAT ARE YOU DOING? UH, NOTHING. 381 00:18:52,362 --> 00:18:54,464 (Mike) SUSAN SHOWED ME THE PAINTING. 382 00:18:54,464 --> 00:18:56,636 THERE'S NOT A SCRATCH ON IT. (Katherine) SHE WHAT?! 383 00:18:56,636 --> 00:18:58,338 (Gabrielle whispers) YOU DIDN'T. (door slams) 384 00:18:58,338 --> 00:19:01,241 SUSAN! 385 00:19:07,317 --> 00:19:10,220 I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THAT. I DIDN'T. 386 00:19:10,220 --> 00:19:13,353 (clicks tongue) (scoffs) 387 00:19:15,154 --> 00:19:17,287 I DIDN'T. UH... 388 00:19:19,559 --> 00:19:22,462 (blow-dryer whirring) SO WHAT ARE WE THINKING? 389 00:19:22,462 --> 00:19:25,295 WELL, SHAYLA-- IT IS SHAYLA, RIGHT? 390 00:19:25,295 --> 00:19:26,436 MM-HMM. 391 00:19:26,436 --> 00:19:28,798 I NEED A FRESH LOOK. MM. 392 00:19:28,798 --> 00:19:30,300 I'VE BEEN GOING THROUGH 393 00:19:30,300 --> 00:19:32,402 SOME PRETTY INTENSE PERSONAL STUFF LATELY. 394 00:19:32,402 --> 00:19:33,643 OH. REALLY? 395 00:19:33,643 --> 00:19:36,876 FINE. I'LL TELL YOU. 396 00:19:36,876 --> 00:19:40,380 I HAVE BEEN HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH A MARRIED MAN, 397 00:19:40,380 --> 00:19:42,452 AND IT'S COME TO THAT POINT 398 00:19:42,452 --> 00:19:45,455 WHERE I CAN'T EVEN LOOK AT MYSELF IN THE MIRROR. 399 00:19:45,455 --> 00:19:48,458 SO I WANT A NEW STYLE THAT SAYS I'M NOT A GIANT TURD OF SIN. 400 00:19:48,458 --> 00:19:50,460 WELL, IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT 401 00:19:50,460 --> 00:19:53,493 THAT YOU FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN. YEAH, THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT AT FIRST, 402 00:19:53,493 --> 00:19:55,495 AND THEN I REALIZED THAT'S STUPID. 403 00:19:55,495 --> 00:19:57,567 I MEAN, WHAT ABOUT HIS POOR WIFE? 404 00:19:57,567 --> 00:19:59,599 WELL, MAYBE SHE DOESN'T LOVE HIM ENOUGH. 405 00:19:59,599 --> 00:20:02,472 OH, NO. SHE DOES. SHE LOVES HIM PLENTY. 406 00:20:02,472 --> 00:20:05,275 SO YOU WANT TO TAKE THE BANGS UP A LITTLE BIT? 407 00:20:05,275 --> 00:20:07,707 AND HE HAS KIDS-- TWO ADORABLE LITTLE KIDS. 408 00:20:07,707 --> 00:20:09,409 THAT'S SAD, 409 00:20:09,409 --> 00:20:12,412 BUT SOMETIMES YOU JUST HAVE TO LOOK OUT FOR YOURSELF. 410 00:20:12,412 --> 00:20:15,415 WELL, MAYBE I AM TIRED OF BEING THAT KIND OF SELFISH BITCH. 411 00:20:15,415 --> 00:20:17,417 HAVE YOU EVER CONSIDERED, UH, HIGHLIGHTS? 412 00:20:17,417 --> 00:20:19,419 FOCUS, SHAYLA! WE ARE TALKING ABOUT 413 00:20:19,419 --> 00:20:21,551 HOW I'M RUINING INNOCENT PEOPLE'S LIVES. 414 00:20:21,551 --> 00:20:25,295 GABY, YOU SEEM LIKE A LOVELY, WARM PERSON. 415 00:20:25,295 --> 00:20:26,656 STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP. 416 00:20:26,656 --> 00:20:29,559 OH, FOR GOD SAKES, YOU BLEACHED BLONDE TWIT. 417 00:20:29,559 --> 00:20:32,262 I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT ME. I'M TALKING ABOUT YOU AND BRADLEY. 418 00:20:32,262 --> 00:20:35,735 WHAT? WHAT--WHAT IS THIS? WHO--WHO ARE YOU? 419 00:20:35,735 --> 00:20:37,737 I'M A FRIEND OF MARIA'S, WHO, BY THE WAY, 420 00:20:37,737 --> 00:20:39,839 HAPPENS TO BE A WARM AND LOVELY PERSON. 421 00:20:39,839 --> 00:20:42,312 WELL, MAYBE SHE IS, BUT BRAD DOESN'T LOVE HER. 422 00:20:42,312 --> 00:20:44,314 HE SAYS HE'S GONNA LEAVE HER. 423 00:20:44,314 --> 00:20:47,517 OH, SHAYLA, HE'S LYING. SHE'S PREGNANT. 424 00:20:47,517 --> 00:20:50,420 THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE. THEY HAVEN'T HAD SEX IN OVER A YEAR. 425 00:20:50,420 --> 00:20:52,282 WELL, CALL THE VATICAN, 426 00:20:52,282 --> 00:20:55,254 'CAUSE WE'RE GONNA NEED A MANGER AND SOME HAY. 427 00:20:55,254 --> 00:20:58,488 GET OUT. I'M JUST TRYING TO PROTECT YOU HERE. 428 00:20:58,488 --> 00:21:01,291 I SAID GET OUT NOW. 429 00:21:03,793 --> 00:21:06,296 OKAY, LET'S JUST TAKE A DEEP BREATH HERE-- 430 00:21:06,296 --> 00:21:09,339 LET'S NOT DO ANYTHING WE'RE GONNA REGRET. 431 00:21:09,339 --> 00:21:12,342 NOW. 432 00:21:16,306 --> 00:21:19,409 (grunts, scoffs) 433 00:21:19,409 --> 00:21:23,613 THIS IS WHY PEOPLE SHOULD NEVER GET THEIR HAIR CUT IN A MALL! 434 00:21:36,866 --> 00:21:39,869 MWAH. OHH. YOU COULDN'T SHAVE? 435 00:21:39,869 --> 00:21:41,501 (scoffs) 436 00:21:41,501 --> 00:21:43,733 COME ON, TOM. YOU NEED TO LOOK NICE. 437 00:21:43,733 --> 00:21:46,736 BREE'S GOING TO A LOT OF TROUBLE FOR THIS DINNER. 438 00:21:46,736 --> 00:21:49,439 WHAT, IS SHE DEBUTING A NEW SALMON PUFF? 439 00:21:49,439 --> 00:21:51,310 OKAY. I WAS GOING TO WAIT 440 00:21:51,310 --> 00:21:53,813 TO TELL YOU THIS WHEN YOU WERE IN A GOOD MOOD, 441 00:21:53,813 --> 00:21:55,915 BUT I REALIZE THAT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN, 442 00:21:55,915 --> 00:21:58,588 SO BREE HAS A SPECIAL GUEST TONIGHT, HER PUBLISHER... MM-HMM. 443 00:21:58,588 --> 00:22:00,590 AND AS LUCK WOULD HAVE IT, 444 00:22:00,590 --> 00:22:03,423 HE'S LOOKING TO HIRE A NEW MARKETING EXECUTIVE. 445 00:22:03,423 --> 00:22:05,425 OH, MY GOD. WHAT ARE YOU-- 446 00:22:05,425 --> 00:22:07,427 ARE YOU TRICKING ME INTO A JOB INTERVIEW? 447 00:22:07,427 --> 00:22:10,430 I'LL FIND SOMETHING, OKAY? I JUST NEED SOME TIME. 448 00:22:10,430 --> 00:22:12,432 YOU'RE GRIEVING. I GET IT. 449 00:22:12,432 --> 00:22:15,465 BUT THIS SOUNDS LIKE A FANTASTIC JOB. 450 00:22:15,465 --> 00:22:18,938 PLEASE JUST HEAR THE GUY OUT AND MAKE A NICE... 451 00:22:18,938 --> 00:22:19,969 IMPRESSION. 452 00:22:19,969 --> 00:22:22,442 FINE. I'LL SHAVE. 453 00:22:22,442 --> 00:22:24,714 AND BRUSH YOUR TEETH. MY EYES ARE WATERING. 454 00:22:24,714 --> 00:22:26,976 OH. (scoffs) 455 00:22:26,976 --> 00:22:29,749 AND DON'T JUST WET THE TOOTHBRUSH. 456 00:22:29,749 --> 00:22:32,752 I CAN TELL. 457 00:22:32,752 --> 00:22:34,924 (doorbell rings) 458 00:22:37,427 --> 00:22:38,858 BRUCE. HELLO. 459 00:22:38,858 --> 00:22:40,860 HI. COME ON IN. HI. 460 00:22:40,860 --> 00:22:43,833 HI. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR JOINING US TONIGHT. 461 00:22:43,833 --> 00:22:45,465 MAY I TAKE YOUR COAT? 462 00:22:45,465 --> 00:22:47,096 SURE. (Orson) LET ME. 463 00:22:47,096 --> 00:22:49,769 OH, WAIT. LET ME GET MY "BRAIN" OUT OF THERE. 464 00:22:49,769 --> 00:22:51,841 I NEVER GO ANYWHERE WITHOUT THIS. 465 00:22:51,841 --> 00:22:53,843 THAT WAY, WHEN I GET A BRIGHT IDEA-- 466 00:22:53,843 --> 00:22:56,005 WHAM! RIGHT INTO THE TAPE RECORDER. 467 00:22:56,005 --> 00:22:58,748 HUH. SOUNDS LIKE QUITE A HANDY GIZMO. THANK YOU, ORVILLE. 468 00:22:58,748 --> 00:23:00,450 IT'S ORSON. 469 00:23:00,450 --> 00:23:03,483 ORVILLE, ORSON--EITHER WAY, HE CAME HOME FROM THE PLAYGROUND 470 00:23:03,483 --> 00:23:06,656 COVERED IN BRUISES. AM I RIGHT? (chuckles) 471 00:23:06,656 --> 00:23:08,157 (beep) IDEA FOR CHILDREN'S BOOK-- 472 00:23:08,157 --> 00:23:10,119 KID WHO GETS THE CRAP KICKED OUT OF HIM 473 00:23:10,119 --> 00:23:13,122 'CAUSE HE HAS A GOOFY NAME. COULD BE "ORSON." (beep, doorbell rings) 474 00:23:13,122 --> 00:23:15,124 OH, THAT'S THEM. WAIT TILL YOU MEET TOM. 475 00:23:15,124 --> 00:23:17,827 YOU'LL BE SO GLAD YOU HAD THAT TAPE RECORDER. 476 00:23:17,827 --> 00:23:20,129 HE'S JUST BURSTING WITH IDEAS. 477 00:23:20,129 --> 00:23:22,131 (Lynette) HI. LYNETTE, TOM, HI. 478 00:23:22,131 --> 00:23:25,134 (Tom) HEY. I'D LIKE YOU TO MEET MY PUBLISHER, BRUCE. 479 00:23:25,134 --> 00:23:27,607 IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU. 480 00:23:27,607 --> 00:23:31,410 HEY. BREE, I'M GETTING A BEER, IF YOU DON'T MIND. 481 00:23:35,445 --> 00:23:38,087 HEY, KATHERINE. 482 00:23:38,087 --> 00:23:40,089 MIKE IS STANDING ACROSS THE STREET 483 00:23:40,089 --> 00:23:42,091 WATCHING TO MAKE SURE I APOLOGIZE, 484 00:23:42,091 --> 00:23:45,094 EVEN THOUGH IT'S CLEAR TO ME YOU'RE THE ONE WHO SHOULD 485 00:23:45,094 --> 00:23:47,096 BE APOLOGIZING FOR THE WAY YOU RUINED MY PARTY. 486 00:23:47,096 --> 00:23:48,598 (whispers) ONE, TWO, THREE. 487 00:23:48,598 --> 00:23:51,200 (normal voice) WELL, THAT SHOULD BE LONG ENOUGH, SO HERE. 488 00:23:51,200 --> 00:23:53,663 KISS MY ASS. BYE. 489 00:23:53,663 --> 00:23:55,465 HOLD ON. 490 00:23:57,106 --> 00:23:59,168 I'M SORRY. 491 00:23:59,168 --> 00:24:03,442 BUT NEITHER OF US EXACTLY GETS A GOLD STAR FOR MODEL BEHAVIOR. 492 00:24:03,442 --> 00:24:04,914 IT'S NOT THE SAME. 493 00:24:04,914 --> 00:24:07,717 WHY NOT? I MEAN, YOU LOVED THAT PAINTING 494 00:24:07,717 --> 00:24:10,049 UNTIL YOU FOUND OUT THAT I DID IT, 495 00:24:10,049 --> 00:24:12,051 AND THEN YOU ACTED TOTALLY PETTY. 496 00:24:12,051 --> 00:24:14,554 SO WHY AM I THE ONLY BAD GUY HERE? 497 00:24:19,929 --> 00:24:22,762 LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING, OKAY? 498 00:24:22,762 --> 00:24:25,194 DIDN'T IT GIVE YOU JUST THE TINIEST LITTLE THRILL 499 00:24:25,194 --> 00:24:26,896 TO TELL ME THAT 500 00:24:26,896 --> 00:24:30,139 THAT PAINTING THAT I WAS SO HAPPY ABOUT WAS YOURS? 501 00:24:30,139 --> 00:24:32,502 THAT I HAD SOMETHING IN MY HOUSE 502 00:24:32,502 --> 00:24:34,844 THAT REPRESENTED THE LOVE BETWEEN YOU AND MIKE? 503 00:24:34,844 --> 00:24:36,576 NO. 504 00:24:36,576 --> 00:24:39,478 THEN WHAT ARE YOU DOING, SUSAN? 505 00:24:39,478 --> 00:24:42,251 CAN'T YOU SEE HOW HARD THIS IS FOR ME? 506 00:24:42,251 --> 00:24:44,514 YOU LIVE RIGHT ACROSS THE STREET. 507 00:24:44,514 --> 00:24:46,956 YOU GUYS SHARE A KID. 508 00:24:46,956 --> 00:24:49,959 DO I HAVE TO HAVE A PAINTING OF YOUR HONEYMOON, TOO? 509 00:24:52,021 --> 00:24:54,193 LOOK, I KNEW I WASN'T GOING TO GET 510 00:24:54,193 --> 00:24:56,195 A CLEAN SLATE WITH MIKE, OKAY? 511 00:24:56,195 --> 00:24:59,969 I JUST WANTED A CLEAN MANTELPIECE. 512 00:25:10,109 --> 00:25:12,511 OH. (silverware clatters) 513 00:25:12,511 --> 00:25:15,785 FANTASTIC DINNER, BREE. THIS WAS A GREAT IDEA. 514 00:25:15,785 --> 00:25:18,788 WELL, I JUST WANTED TO GET YOU TOGETHER WITH TOM HERE. 515 00:25:18,788 --> 00:25:20,790 I THOUGHT YOU TWO MIGHT HIT IT OFF. 516 00:25:20,790 --> 00:25:24,554 YEAH. TOM, BREE SAYS YOU USED TO BE QUITE THE AD WIZ. 517 00:25:24,554 --> 00:25:26,796 OH, I DON'T KNOW. 518 00:25:26,796 --> 00:25:29,999 HE'S BEING MODEST. HE WAS THE BEST. 519 00:25:29,999 --> 00:25:31,300 GOOD, BECAUSE I'M LOOKING 520 00:25:31,300 --> 00:25:34,003 FOR SOMEONE TO HEAD UP A NEW DIVISION. 521 00:25:34,003 --> 00:25:36,205 I'M GOING TO PUT SOME COFFEE ON. 522 00:25:36,205 --> 00:25:39,068 ORSON, WOULD YOU GIVE ME A HAND? 523 00:25:39,068 --> 00:25:40,710 LET THESE THREE CHAT. 524 00:25:42,872 --> 00:25:44,113 (sniffles) 525 00:25:44,113 --> 00:25:46,245 SO DO YOU THINK YOU HAVE ANY INTEREST 526 00:25:46,245 --> 00:25:48,547 IN GETTING BACK IN THE GAME? 527 00:25:48,547 --> 00:25:50,049 I DON'T KNOW. 528 00:25:50,049 --> 00:25:52,582 THE TIMING'S A LITTLE WEIRD. (chuckles) 529 00:25:52,582 --> 00:25:54,553 HOW SO? 530 00:25:54,553 --> 00:25:55,855 I DON'T KNOW. 531 00:25:55,855 --> 00:25:59,789 WELL, TOM WAS JUST RUNNING A VERY SUCCESSFUL RESTAURANT, 532 00:25:59,789 --> 00:26:02,632 AND HE JUST SOLD IT AT A HANDSOME PROFIT. 533 00:26:02,632 --> 00:26:06,095 SO HE'S WAITING FOR THE RIGHT OPPORTUNITY. 534 00:26:06,095 --> 00:26:09,669 YOU MIGHT HAVE TO DO A LITTLE SELLING HERE, BRUCE. 535 00:26:09,669 --> 00:26:12,872 HUH. I GUESS THE GOOD ONES ARE ALWAYS THE HARDEST TO LAND. 536 00:26:12,872 --> 00:26:13,943 YEAH. 537 00:26:13,943 --> 00:26:15,905 LET ME GIVE IT A SHOT. 538 00:26:15,905 --> 00:26:17,777 WE REPRESENT A SMALL STABLE 539 00:26:17,777 --> 00:26:19,779 OF ELITE NONFICTION AUTHORS FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD. 540 00:26:19,779 --> 00:26:22,311 SO YOU'D BE WORKING CLOSELY WITH THOSE WRITERS 541 00:26:22,311 --> 00:26:23,813 TO COME UP WITH 542 00:26:23,813 --> 00:26:25,955 CREATIVE APPROACHES TO SELLING THEIR BOOKS. 543 00:26:25,955 --> 00:26:29,118 THAT SOUNDS... AMAZING. 544 00:26:29,118 --> 00:26:31,020 I DON'T KNOW. 545 00:26:31,020 --> 00:26:32,662 ARE THERE MORE POTATOES? 546 00:26:32,662 --> 00:26:36,325 YOU CAN HAVE MINE. (chuckles) 547 00:26:36,325 --> 00:26:38,297 (whispers) STOP SAYING, "I DON'T KNOW." 548 00:26:38,297 --> 00:26:40,029 (chuckles nervously) 549 00:26:40,029 --> 00:26:41,671 MM. 550 00:26:41,671 --> 00:26:43,673 SOUNDS LIKE THERE'S A LOT OF TRAVELING. 551 00:26:43,673 --> 00:26:47,006 I'M NOT, YOU KNOW, REALLY BIG ON LIVING OUT OF A SUITCASE. 552 00:26:47,006 --> 00:26:49,208 EVEN TO DO TWO WEEKS AT THE BOOK FAIR IN PARIS 553 00:26:49,208 --> 00:26:51,881 WHILE YOU STAY AT A FIVE-STAR HOTEL? 554 00:26:51,881 --> 00:26:53,242 PARIS? 555 00:26:53,242 --> 00:26:54,944 LIKE FRANCE? 556 00:26:54,944 --> 00:26:57,616 YES, LIKE THE GREATEST CITY IN THE WORLD. 557 00:26:57,616 --> 00:27:00,289 GEE, I'M GETTING LYNETTE EXCITED. 558 00:27:00,289 --> 00:27:03,392 TOO BAD YOU DON'T HAVE ANY ADVERTISING EXPERIENCE. 559 00:27:03,392 --> 00:27:05,194 OH. 560 00:27:08,698 --> 00:27:12,201 ACTUALLY, I HAVE 12 YEARS OF EXPERIENCE. 561 00:27:12,201 --> 00:27:13,833 REALLY? 562 00:27:13,833 --> 00:27:14,934 YEAH. 563 00:27:14,934 --> 00:27:17,336 I WAS ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE FOR EIGHT YEARS, 564 00:27:17,336 --> 00:27:20,109 V.P. FOR FOUR MORE AFTER THAT, 565 00:27:20,109 --> 00:27:22,271 AND BY THE WAY, I WROTE MY GRADUATE THESIS 566 00:27:22,271 --> 00:27:25,414 ON THE RISE OF THE NONFICTION NOVEL. 567 00:27:25,414 --> 00:27:27,076 W-WOW. 568 00:27:27,076 --> 00:27:30,750 I KNOW. SO WHAT KIND OF STARTING SALARY ARE WE TALKING ABOUT? 569 00:27:30,750 --> 00:27:34,053 (laughs) LYNETTE, CAN I SEE YOU FOR A SEC? 570 00:27:34,053 --> 00:27:36,325 OKAY. BRUCE, COULD YOU HOLD THAT THOUGHT? 571 00:27:36,325 --> 00:27:39,388 I'M GONNA BE RIGHT BACK. 572 00:27:41,230 --> 00:27:43,392 (gasps) WELL, WE'RE ON PINS AND NEEDLES. 573 00:27:43,392 --> 00:27:46,235 HOW'S IT GOING? 574 00:27:46,235 --> 00:27:49,398 WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? I'M GETTING THIS JOB. THAT'S WHAT I'M DOING. 575 00:27:49,398 --> 00:27:53,202 I THOUGHT IT WAS MY JOB. WELL, YOU'RE NOT ACTING LIKE YOU WANT IT VERY MUCH, MISTER... 576 00:27:53,202 --> 00:27:55,344 (imitates Tom) "UH, I DON'T KNOW. 577 00:27:55,344 --> 00:27:58,047 ARE THERE ANY MORE POTATOES?" IT'S NOT THAT I DON'T WANT IT. 578 00:27:58,047 --> 00:28:00,349 IT'S JUST THAT IT'S ALL HAPPENING SO FAST. 579 00:28:00,349 --> 00:28:04,213 I NEED A LITTLE TIME TO LICK MY WOUNDS. OKAY, YOU LICK. I'M GOING TO PARIS. 580 00:28:04,213 --> 00:28:07,116 YOU'RE NOT TAKING MY JOB. 581 00:28:07,116 --> 00:28:09,418 YOUR JOB? THE ONE YOU'RE MAGICALLY GONNA GET BY SULKING 582 00:28:09,418 --> 00:28:12,762 AND ACTING LIKE A BRAT? YOU HAD A SHOT. YOU BLEW IT. 583 00:28:12,762 --> 00:28:14,263 OH, YEAH? YEAH. 584 00:28:14,263 --> 00:28:18,327 YOU JUST MESSED WITH THE BULL, SISTER. 585 00:28:18,327 --> 00:28:20,930 PREPARE TO GET THE HORNS. 586 00:28:22,331 --> 00:28:24,834 I... UGH! 587 00:28:24,834 --> 00:28:27,236 MAYBE WE SHOULD SLICE THE TART IN HERE. 588 00:28:27,236 --> 00:28:30,339 I DON'T WANT TO BRING A LARGE KNIFE INTO THIS. 589 00:28:42,151 --> 00:28:44,323 BRUCE... 590 00:28:44,323 --> 00:28:46,325 I WAS JUST SAYING TO LYNETTE, 591 00:28:46,325 --> 00:28:49,328 I GAVE YOU MY "I DON'T REALLY CARE ABOUT THIS JOB" THING 592 00:28:49,328 --> 00:28:51,901 TO SEE IF YOU REALLY CARE ABOUT THIS JOB, 593 00:28:51,901 --> 00:28:55,004 AND YOU DO, AND I LIKE THAT. 594 00:28:55,004 --> 00:28:56,766 CLEVER. 595 00:28:56,766 --> 00:28:58,938 NOW WE HAVEN'T TALKED COMPENSATION PACKAGE YET, 596 00:28:58,938 --> 00:29:01,010 BUT I GOT A GOOD FEELING-- 597 00:29:01,010 --> 00:29:04,013 YOU KNOW, TOM, YOU'RE RIGHT. BRUCE DOES CARE ABOUT THIS JOB. 598 00:29:04,013 --> 00:29:06,375 THAT'S WHY HE WANTS TO MAKE SURE 599 00:29:06,375 --> 00:29:08,848 HE GETS THE PERFECT PERSON FOR IT. 600 00:29:08,848 --> 00:29:11,350 WELL, LYNETTE, YOU YOURSELF SAID I WAS THE BEST. 601 00:29:11,350 --> 00:29:15,084 OH, YOU WERE. YOU WERE THE BEST PERSON WHO EVER WORKED FOR ME. 602 00:29:15,084 --> 00:29:18,387 I USED TO BE HIS BOSS. 603 00:29:20,259 --> 00:29:23,262 THIS IS NOT WHAT I HAD IN MIND. I DON'T KNOW 604 00:29:23,262 --> 00:29:27,867 WHY EITHER ONE OF THEM WANTS TO WORK FOR THAT JACKASS. NOW, NOW. HE'S BEEN VERY GOOD TO ME. 605 00:29:27,867 --> 00:29:29,869 WELL, OF COURSE HE HAS, 606 00:29:29,869 --> 00:29:31,871 BECAUSE HE KNOWS YOU MAKE HIM A LOT OF MONEY. 607 00:29:31,871 --> 00:29:34,874 ME, ON THE OTHER HAND, HE SEES AS AN INSIGNIFICANT LITTLE MAN, 608 00:29:34,874 --> 00:29:36,375 BARELY WORTH MENTIONING 609 00:29:36,375 --> 00:29:40,910 AS HE TALKS INTO HIS ANNOYING, PENIS-SHAPED TAPE RECORDER. 610 00:29:40,910 --> 00:29:42,381 SO I SAID TO HIM, 611 00:29:42,381 --> 00:29:46,315 "JE CROIS QUE C'EST L'HOMME QUI FAIT LES CHEZ D'OEUVRES." 612 00:29:46,315 --> 00:29:48,818 AND HE SAID TO ME, "NON, LYNETTE. 613 00:29:48,818 --> 00:29:52,261 CE SONT LES CHEZ D'OEUVRES QUI FONT L'HOMME." 614 00:29:52,261 --> 00:29:55,925 (chuckles) GREAT STORY... I ASSUME. 615 00:29:55,925 --> 00:29:58,998 I DON'T SPEAK ANOTHER LANGUAGE, BUT I'VE HAD AD CAMPAIGNS 616 00:29:58,998 --> 00:30:01,100 TRANSLATED INTO 12 DIFFERENT ONES, 617 00:30:01,100 --> 00:30:03,432 INCLUDING PROFESSOR CRISPY'S POTATO CHIPS. 618 00:30:03,432 --> 00:30:05,504 I LOVE THAT CAMPAIGN. YOU DID THAT? 619 00:30:05,504 --> 00:30:07,036 I DID. 620 00:30:07,036 --> 00:30:09,879 YES. TOM WAS VERY GOOD AT HIS JOB, 621 00:30:09,879 --> 00:30:13,382 RIGHT UP UNTIL HE GOT FIRED. (chuckles) 622 00:30:13,382 --> 00:30:16,485 (chuckles) WELL, ACTUALLY, I WAS RELIEVED TO GET FIRED. 623 00:30:16,485 --> 00:30:18,517 MY BOSS WAS KIND OF A BALLBUSTER. 624 00:30:18,517 --> 00:30:21,290 OOPS. SHE'S RIGHT HERE. (laughs) 625 00:30:21,290 --> 00:30:24,293 JE REGRETTE. 626 00:30:24,293 --> 00:30:27,426 (door opens) 627 00:30:27,426 --> 00:30:29,458 OH. WOULD ANYONE CARE FOR SOMETHING SWEET? 628 00:30:29,458 --> 00:30:31,530 I KNOW I WOULD. 629 00:30:39,468 --> 00:30:43,412 WELL, WE'VE ALL HAD OUR TROUBLES AS BOSSES, HAVEN'T WE, TOM? 630 00:30:43,412 --> 00:30:45,414 I WAS SORT OF SUGARCOATING IT 631 00:30:45,414 --> 00:30:47,977 WHEN I SAID HIS RESTAURANT WAS VERY SUCCESSFUL. 632 00:30:47,977 --> 00:30:50,279 THE TRUTH IS, HE MISMANAGED THAT PIZZA JOINT 633 00:30:50,279 --> 00:30:52,221 RIGHT INTO THE GROUND. 634 00:30:53,582 --> 00:30:55,354 LET ME BE VERY CLEAR. 635 00:30:55,354 --> 00:30:57,456 I THINK LYNETTE IS FANTASTIC. 636 00:30:57,456 --> 00:30:59,528 SHE IS A GREAT MANAGER, 637 00:30:59,528 --> 00:31:01,590 SHE'S GOT TERRIFIC PEOPLE SKILLS 638 00:31:01,590 --> 00:31:03,292 AND IS VERY RELIABLE... 639 00:31:03,292 --> 00:31:06,635 AS LONG AS THE CANCER DOESN'T FLARE UP AGAIN. 640 00:31:10,469 --> 00:31:14,303 YOU KNOW WHAT? 641 00:31:14,303 --> 00:31:16,105 IT'S GETTING LATE. 642 00:31:16,105 --> 00:31:19,608 I SHOULD PROBABLY HIT THE ROAD. 643 00:31:19,608 --> 00:31:22,481 BUT WHAT ABOUT THE JOB? 644 00:31:22,481 --> 00:31:23,983 YEAH... 645 00:31:23,983 --> 00:31:27,186 I JUST STARTED LOOKING. I'M SURE IT'S GONNA BE A LONG PROCESS, 646 00:31:27,186 --> 00:31:30,589 BUT TRUST ME, YOU'VE CERTAINLY MADE AN IMPRESSION. 647 00:31:32,891 --> 00:31:35,494 I'LL GET YOUR COAT. 648 00:31:37,196 --> 00:31:39,468 OH, IT'S A SHAME YOU CAN'T STAY FOR DESSERT. 649 00:31:39,468 --> 00:31:41,030 I'VE MADE TARTE TATIN. 650 00:31:41,030 --> 00:31:43,272 (beep) IDEA FOR NOVEL-- 651 00:31:43,272 --> 00:31:47,476 WOMAN WHO'S MARRIED TO A GAY MAN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT. 652 00:31:47,476 --> 00:31:48,537 (beep) 653 00:31:48,537 --> 00:31:52,281 WELL, THANKS AGAIN. 654 00:31:53,482 --> 00:31:56,545 I DON'T KNOW WHEN I'VE HAD SUCH AN INTERESTING EVENING. 655 00:31:56,545 --> 00:31:59,488 I'LL CALL YOU TOMORROW. WE'LL TALK ABOUT YOUR FRIENDS. 656 00:32:02,291 --> 00:32:04,153 UH, BRUCE, 657 00:32:04,153 --> 00:32:07,997 WHY DON'T I WRAP UP A PIECE OF THAT TART TO GO? YEAH. 658 00:32:11,160 --> 00:32:13,132 (lowered voice) GIVE IT. 659 00:32:13,132 --> 00:32:15,404 GIVE WHAT? BRUCE'S TAPE RECORDER. 660 00:32:15,404 --> 00:32:18,137 I DON'T KNOW WHAT-- YOU TOOK IT. I SAW YOU. 661 00:32:18,137 --> 00:32:20,939 (Bruce) HEY. HAS ANYBODY SEEN MY TAPE RECORDER? 662 00:32:20,939 --> 00:32:23,942 IT WAS RIGHT HERE. I'LL LOOK. 663 00:32:23,942 --> 00:32:26,175 (grunts) HEY. 664 00:32:26,175 --> 00:32:27,476 AH. 665 00:32:27,476 --> 00:32:29,178 STOP. (grunts) 666 00:32:29,178 --> 00:32:32,451 I DON'T HAVE IT. OOH! WHAT DO YOU CALL THIS? 667 00:32:32,451 --> 00:32:34,653 UH, BRUCE IS LOOKING FOR, UH... 668 00:32:38,157 --> 00:32:40,459 NEVER MIND. 669 00:32:42,161 --> 00:32:44,363 WE WILL TALK ABOUT THIS LATER. 670 00:32:46,295 --> 00:32:51,600 OH. LOOK WHAT GOT BROUGHT IN WITH THE DIRTY NAPKINS. 671 00:32:51,600 --> 00:32:53,472 THANKS. 672 00:32:53,472 --> 00:32:55,544 (sighs) 673 00:33:02,151 --> 00:33:05,384 HELLO, GABY. OOH! 674 00:33:05,384 --> 00:33:07,416 JEEZ, BRADLEY, YOU SCARED ME! 675 00:33:07,416 --> 00:33:11,060 YOU TALKED TO SHAYLA. YEAH, SHE'S A REAL GEM. 676 00:33:11,060 --> 00:33:13,392 YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE DONE THAT. WE HAVE A DEAL. 677 00:33:13,392 --> 00:33:15,394 WELL, I'M TIRED OF THE DEAL, 678 00:33:15,394 --> 00:33:18,367 AND WHAT YOU'RE DOING TO MARIA IS DESPICABLE. 679 00:33:18,367 --> 00:33:20,369 HEY. YOU'RE IN NO POSITION TO JUDGE ME. 680 00:33:20,369 --> 00:33:23,502 DON'T FORGET, I WAS WORKING WITH CARLOS WHEN YOU CHEATED ON HIM. 681 00:33:23,502 --> 00:33:26,475 YEAH, WELL, I'M NOT THAT PERSON ANYMORE. 682 00:33:26,475 --> 00:33:28,177 I'VE CHANGED. 683 00:33:28,177 --> 00:33:29,678 RIGHT. YOU'RE WORSE. 684 00:33:29,678 --> 00:33:32,181 YOU'RE SO WORRIED ABOUT MARIA 685 00:33:32,181 --> 00:33:34,483 UNTIL THERE'S MONEY OR VACATION TIME AT STAKE. 686 00:33:34,483 --> 00:33:37,015 THEN YOU'RE ONLY WORRIED ABOUT GABY. 687 00:33:37,015 --> 00:33:39,318 YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU'RE RIGHT. 688 00:33:39,318 --> 00:33:41,490 I'M OUT. 689 00:33:41,490 --> 00:33:43,492 WHAT DO YOU MEAN? DEAL'S OVER. 690 00:33:43,492 --> 00:33:46,024 I'M NOT COVERING FOR YOUR STUPID LITTLE FLING ANYMORE. 691 00:33:46,024 --> 00:33:48,026 IT'S NOT A FLING. I LOVE HER. 692 00:33:48,026 --> 00:33:50,799 SHE'S THE MOST INCREDIBLE WOMAN I'VE EVER MET. 693 00:33:50,799 --> 00:33:52,801 SHAYLA? SHE HAS A HELLO KITTY TIP JAR. 694 00:33:52,801 --> 00:33:55,704 WELL, SHE MAKES ME HAPPY. I CAN'T GIVE HER UP. 695 00:33:55,704 --> 00:33:59,068 (sighs) WELL, AT LEAST BE MAN ENOUGH TO TELL MARIA, 696 00:33:59,068 --> 00:34:01,410 BECAUSE IF YOU DON'T, I WILL. 697 00:34:03,212 --> 00:34:04,543 ALL RIGHT, FINE. 698 00:34:04,543 --> 00:34:06,475 I WILL TELL MARIA. 699 00:34:06,475 --> 00:34:08,377 AND YOU CAN TELL CARLOS 700 00:34:08,377 --> 00:34:13,222 TO BRING A BOX TO WORK ON MONDAY 'CAUSE HE'S FIRED. 701 00:34:24,293 --> 00:34:26,165 SO DINNER... 702 00:34:28,337 --> 00:34:29,598 WOW. 703 00:34:29,598 --> 00:34:32,601 LYNETTE, I WILL REGRET FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE 704 00:34:32,601 --> 00:34:34,303 WHAT I SAID TONIGHT. 705 00:34:34,303 --> 00:34:36,805 I... I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON WITH ME. 706 00:34:36,805 --> 00:34:39,408 I DO, AND IT'S OKAY. 707 00:34:39,408 --> 00:34:42,381 BESIDES, DID YOU HEAR WHAT CAME OUT OF MY MOUTH? 708 00:34:42,381 --> 00:34:44,813 LIKE I SAID... WOW. 709 00:34:44,813 --> 00:34:48,157 WOULDN'T YOU LOVE TO HEAR WHAT BRUCE SAID 710 00:34:48,157 --> 00:34:50,659 INTO HIS TAPE RECORDER ON THE RIDE HOME? 711 00:34:50,659 --> 00:34:52,261 (chuckles) 712 00:34:52,261 --> 00:34:54,423 (imitates Bruce) "IDEA-- CHECK LOCAL MENTAL HOSPITAL 713 00:34:54,423 --> 00:34:56,165 FOR ESCAPED MARRIED COUPLE." 714 00:34:56,165 --> 00:34:57,396 (chuckles) 715 00:35:07,506 --> 00:35:09,278 SO... 716 00:35:09,278 --> 00:35:12,811 WERE YOU SERIOUS ABOUT WANTING TO GO BACK TO WORK? 717 00:35:14,743 --> 00:35:16,715 (laughs) 718 00:35:16,715 --> 00:35:19,188 I WAS TALKING ABOUT THAT JOB TONIGHT 719 00:35:19,188 --> 00:35:21,550 AND TRYING TO CONVINCE BRUCE I WAS GOOD, 720 00:35:21,550 --> 00:35:24,323 AND I REMEMBERED SOMETHING. I AM GOOD. 721 00:35:24,323 --> 00:35:28,497 AND I WOULD LIKE ANOTHER CHANCE TO PROVE IT. 722 00:35:28,497 --> 00:35:31,530 OKAY. 723 00:35:31,530 --> 00:35:33,462 REALLY? 724 00:35:33,462 --> 00:35:37,706 YEAH. WE DID MY THING FOR SEVEN YEARS. 725 00:35:37,706 --> 00:35:39,438 NOW IT'S YOUR TURN. 726 00:35:40,909 --> 00:35:42,511 OH! MWAH. 727 00:35:44,843 --> 00:35:47,676 DO YOU KNOW HOW EMBARRASSED I WOULD HAVE BEEN 728 00:35:47,676 --> 00:35:49,718 IF BRUCE HAD SEEN YOU TAKE IT? 729 00:35:49,718 --> 00:35:52,551 HE DESERVED IT. HE INSULTED ME. 730 00:35:52,551 --> 00:35:55,254 SO SAY SOMETHING. STAND UP TO HIM. BUT STEALING? 731 00:35:55,254 --> 00:35:58,257 HONESTLY, ORSON, WHY WOULD YOU DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT? 732 00:35:58,257 --> 00:36:00,829 I DON'T KNOW, BREE. 733 00:36:00,829 --> 00:36:03,792 I DON'T. HERE'S SOMETHING I DO KNOW-- 734 00:36:03,792 --> 00:36:05,794 WHEN I WAS A SUCCESSFUL DENTIST, 735 00:36:05,794 --> 00:36:09,338 NO ONE SPOKE TO ME THE WAY THEY DO NOW. 736 00:36:09,338 --> 00:36:11,700 WHEN I LOST MY PRACTICE, I LOST PEOPLE'S RESPECT. 737 00:36:11,700 --> 00:36:14,643 AND YOU HOPE TO EARN IT BACK THROUGH LARCENY? 738 00:36:14,643 --> 00:36:16,645 YOU HAVEN'T WALKED IN MY SHOES. 739 00:36:16,645 --> 00:36:19,908 TOM LOST HIS JOB. EVERYONE JUMPED TO HIS RESCUE. 740 00:36:19,908 --> 00:36:21,650 EVEN YOU-- 741 00:36:21,650 --> 00:36:24,613 BENDING OVER BACKWARDS TRYING TO GET HIM A JOB. 742 00:36:24,613 --> 00:36:26,955 I DON'T NEED TO WALK IN YOUR SHOES, ORSON. 743 00:36:26,955 --> 00:36:29,958 WHAT YOU DID WAS EMBARRASSING AND CHILDISH, 744 00:36:29,958 --> 00:36:32,591 AND IT'S NEVER GONNA HAPPEN AGAIN. 745 00:36:32,591 --> 00:36:34,523 UNDERSTOOD? 746 00:37:02,491 --> 00:37:05,494 (indistinct conversations) 747 00:37:09,498 --> 00:37:11,660 SEE YOU. THANK YOU. 748 00:37:11,660 --> 00:37:14,703 FATHER? YES. CAN I HELP YOU? 749 00:37:14,703 --> 00:37:17,706 OH, I HOPE SO. I, UH, SAW YOU THE OTHER NIGHT 750 00:37:17,706 --> 00:37:19,708 WHEN YOU WERE BUYING YOUR LOTTERY TICKET. 751 00:37:19,708 --> 00:37:21,740 I WAS WITH MY HUSBAND DAVE. 752 00:37:21,740 --> 00:37:23,712 AH. 753 00:37:23,712 --> 00:37:26,575 YES. HE SAID THAT YOU BARELY KNOW EACH OTHER, 754 00:37:26,575 --> 00:37:28,917 BUT IT DIDN'T SEEM THAT WAY TO ME. 755 00:37:28,917 --> 00:37:31,450 AND, WELL, 756 00:37:31,450 --> 00:37:34,583 HE REFUSES TO TALK ABOUT HIS PAST, 757 00:37:34,583 --> 00:37:37,726 SO IF THERE IS ANYTHING THAT YOU COULD TELL ME ABOUT HIM-- 758 00:37:37,726 --> 00:37:40,859 I'M NOT SURE I CAN DO THAT. 759 00:37:40,859 --> 00:37:43,962 PLEASE. HE HAS SO MANY SECRETS, 760 00:37:43,962 --> 00:37:46,295 AND I DON'T HAVE ANYONE ELSE TO TURN TO. 761 00:37:46,295 --> 00:37:49,638 I WISH I COULD HELP YOU, BUT... 762 00:37:49,638 --> 00:37:52,801 THIS IS SOMETHING YOU NEED TO DISCUSS WITH YOUR HUSBAND. 763 00:37:52,801 --> 00:37:55,604 WELL, IF IT WAS THAT EASY, 764 00:37:55,604 --> 00:37:59,508 DO YOU THINK THAT I WOULD BE HERE? I'M SORRY. 765 00:37:59,508 --> 00:38:04,453 PLEASE KNOW THAT MY THOUGHTS ARE WITH YOU BOTH, MRS. DASH. 766 00:38:04,453 --> 00:38:07,316 IT'S WILLIAMS. 767 00:38:07,316 --> 00:38:09,518 I'M TOO OLD-SCHOOL FOR MY OWN GOOD. 768 00:38:09,518 --> 00:38:13,061 I SHOULDN'T JUST ASSUME THAT YOU TOOK YOUR HUSBAND'S NAME. 769 00:38:13,061 --> 00:38:15,324 ANYWAY... 770 00:38:15,324 --> 00:38:18,467 GOOD LUCK, MRS. WILLIAMS. 771 00:38:33,782 --> 00:38:36,785 HEY, SUSAN. I THOUGHT I HAD M.J. TILL 7:00. 772 00:38:36,785 --> 00:38:39,748 UH, YOU DO. I AM HERE TO TAKE MY PAINTING BACK. 773 00:38:39,748 --> 00:38:42,020 BUT YOU GAVE IT TO ME. IT'S MINE. 774 00:38:42,020 --> 00:38:44,493 WELL, NOW I'M UNGIVING IT. TRY TO KEEP UP. 775 00:38:44,493 --> 00:38:47,996 OKAY, IF THIS IS ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED AT THE HOUSEWARMING... 776 00:38:47,996 --> 00:38:49,498 IT IS, ACTUALLY, 777 00:38:49,498 --> 00:38:51,800 BECAUSE THAT IS WHEN I DECIDED 778 00:38:51,800 --> 00:38:56,465 THAT I DON'T WANT THIS PIECE OF ART THAT I SLAVED OVER 779 00:38:56,465 --> 00:38:58,607 HANGING IN THE HOUSE YOU ARE SHARING 780 00:38:58,607 --> 00:39:00,709 WITH YOUR NEW GIRLFRIEND. CAPISCE? 781 00:39:00,709 --> 00:39:02,871 OKAY, SO THE OTHER NIGHT YOU WERE MAD 782 00:39:02,871 --> 00:39:05,874 BECAUSE IT WASN'T HANGING UP, BUT NOW YOU WANT TO TAKE IT? 783 00:39:05,874 --> 00:39:08,877 YEP. I'M COMPLICATED LIKE THAT. AREN'T YOU GLAD YOU DIVORCED ME? 784 00:39:08,877 --> 00:39:12,350 IF YOU TWO WANT A PAINTING SO BAD, PAINT YOUR OWN. 785 00:39:12,350 --> 00:39:13,722 SUSAN-- MAYFAIR. 786 00:39:13,722 --> 00:39:15,353 (scoffs) 787 00:39:15,353 --> 00:39:16,985 STAY OUT OF THIS. 788 00:39:19,988 --> 00:39:23,632 THIS IS BETWEEN ME AND MY EX. 789 00:39:23,632 --> 00:39:24,963 GOT IT? 790 00:39:42,050 --> 00:39:43,652 UNBELIEVABLE. 791 00:39:47,556 --> 00:39:50,559 ANYWAY, I'M THINKING A BRIGHTER COLOR FOR THE BABY'S ROOM. 792 00:39:50,559 --> 00:39:52,891 NOW I KNOW IT'S A BIT OF A STRETCH, 793 00:39:52,891 --> 00:39:55,594 BUT HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT TURQUOISE? 794 00:39:58,697 --> 00:40:00,569 SWEETHEART? 795 00:40:02,501 --> 00:40:04,533 WE NEED TO TALK. 796 00:40:22,150 --> 00:40:24,493 WHAT YOU READING? 797 00:40:24,493 --> 00:40:26,595 THE WANT ADS. 798 00:40:26,595 --> 00:40:29,628 CAN'T DECIDE IF I SHOULD BE A DATA ENTRY OPERATOR 799 00:40:29,628 --> 00:40:31,460 OR JOIN THE MARINES. 800 00:40:32,761 --> 00:40:34,463 I'M SO SORRY. 801 00:40:34,463 --> 00:40:37,466 DON'T BE. I TOLD YOU, I HATED WORKING FOR THAT JACKASS. 802 00:40:37,466 --> 00:40:40,469 YOU DID THE RIGHT THING. I SHOULD HAVE DONE IT SOONER. 803 00:40:40,469 --> 00:40:41,770 BUT YOU DID IT, 804 00:40:41,770 --> 00:40:44,773 EVEN THOUGH YOU KNEW YOU WERE GONNA LOSE A LOT OF MONEY. 805 00:40:44,773 --> 00:40:47,776 YOU'RE A GOOD PERSON, BABE. I'M VERY PROUD OF YOU. 806 00:40:47,776 --> 00:40:51,449 WELL, THAT MEANS A LOT, COMING FROM A UNITED STATES MARINE. 807 00:40:51,449 --> 00:40:55,023 MM. (telephone rings) 808 00:40:55,023 --> 00:40:56,725 (ring, beep) 809 00:40:56,725 --> 00:40:58,687 HELLO? 810 00:40:58,687 --> 00:41:00,589 MARIA. 811 00:41:00,589 --> 00:41:01,990 CALM DOWN. 812 00:41:01,990 --> 00:41:03,892 CALM DOWN. 813 00:41:05,694 --> 00:41:08,537 OKAY, WE'RE COMING OVER. 814 00:41:08,537 --> 00:41:09,838 (beep) 815 00:41:09,838 --> 00:41:12,000 I GUESS BRADLEY TOLD HER. 816 00:41:17,506 --> 00:41:19,808 THANKS FOR COMING. 817 00:41:19,808 --> 00:41:21,910 I DIDN'T KNOW WHO ELSE TO CALL. 818 00:41:23,682 --> 00:41:24,983 IT WAS HORRIBLE. 819 00:41:24,983 --> 00:41:27,215 HE JUST KEPT TELLING ME HE LOVES HER. 820 00:41:27,215 --> 00:41:29,858 SHE'S THE BEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO HIM. 821 00:41:29,858 --> 00:41:33,491 HE FINALLY UNDERSTANDS WHAT LOVE MEANS. 822 00:41:41,530 --> 00:41:44,072 I JUST WANTED HIM TO STOP TALKING. 823 00:41:53,712 --> 00:41:56,044 YOU SHOULD NEVER BE TOO IMPRESSED 824 00:41:56,044 --> 00:41:58,717 BY PEOPLE WITH GOOD MANNERS. 825 00:41:58,717 --> 00:42:01,990 THEY'RE THE ONES WHO WILL GIVE A FRIENDLY WAVE 826 00:42:01,990 --> 00:42:05,253 EVEN WHEN THEY'VE STOLEN FROM YOU... 827 00:42:06,855 --> 00:42:10,298 THEY'RE THE TYPE TO SWEETLY WELCOME YOU... 828 00:42:10,298 --> 00:42:14,102 EVEN AS THEY TRY TO UNCOVER YOUR SECRETS... 829 00:42:14,102 --> 00:42:17,866 (typing on keyboard) 830 00:42:17,866 --> 00:42:22,571 THEY'RE THE KIND TO OFFER YOU COFFEE, 831 00:42:22,571 --> 00:42:26,845 EVEN AS THEY REPORT YOU TO THE POLICE. 832 00:42:29,948 --> 00:42:36,054 AND DON'T BE TOO OFFENDED BY SOMEONE WHO'S OPENLY RUDE... 833 00:42:36,054 --> 00:42:38,687 BECAUSE THEY MAY BE THAT WAY 834 00:42:38,687 --> 00:42:42,661 FOR THE NICEST OF REASONS. 62870

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