All language subtitles for That.70s.Show.S07E14.720p.Bluray - Street Fighting Man

You guys,

Guess what all of us are
doing on sunday afternoon.

Uh, I hope it's not
going antiquing again.

I told you, donna.
That's just for girls.

Loved it.
Definitely in.

No, during my radio show

We did a promotion where the tenth
caller gets six tickets to the packers game.

And since I turned off all the outside
phone lines after caller number nine,

I was caller number ten.
We're going to the packers game !

Oh, awesome ! We got six tickets,
and there's six of us !

No, wait.
One, two, three...

Fez, stop moving around.
You're confusing me.

Wait, wait, wait. So we're
all gonna go to the game

Together ?

What, you won't go now 'cause
you and hyde are broken up ?

Well, I guess you'd rather stay
here and make sweet, short love to me.

No, no, no, I'm fine with going, because
I'm the one who did the breaking up.

Steven is the one
who's all devastated,

So why don't you go make
sweet, short love to him ?

Um, I think something
got messed up here.

Well, I'm going,
because I'm fine.

Well, good, 'cause
I'm fine, too.

In fact, I'm superfine.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

I'm the one who's
superfine here, all right ?

I got the t-Shirt that says so.

Well, you also have a t-Shirt that
says "I'm with stupid," and the
arrow's pointing straight up.

Yeah, I hate that t-Shirt.
It doesn't even make any sense.

Who's above me ?

Okay, uh, I hate to
say it, you guys, but

I think one of these tickets
has to go to my dad.

So that means one of us
has to sit this out. Let me see.

Eeny, meeny,
miney, kelso.

What ?

How could you choose
your dad over me ?

Look, my dad is a huge packers fan,
and he's never even been to a game.

Forman, it's not a problem.
We can all go.

Me, kelso and fez will
do the old ticket stub switch.

That sounds dirty.

Well, it's not.

I'll do it anyway.

What exactly sounds dirty
about "ticket stub switch" ?

Oh, come on.

Stub, switch.

What are you, frigid ?

Hey, dad, um,

Say, could you give me a
ride this sunday afternoon at,

I don't know, 1:00 ?

Eric, this is football season.

I know this doesn't mean much
to you since there are no

Flying men with capes involved,

But I can't drive you anywhere
on sunday until the spring.

And then your mother can do it.

Well, what if it was a ride
to legendary lambeau field

Where the packers are playing the bears
and where you will be sitting next to me

On the 50 yard line ?

Eric...

What do you say, dad ?
This'll be great, huh ?

Honey,

Are you crying ?

No !

See this young man here ?

That's my boy.

And he invited me to
come and see this game.

I did that.

That was me.

Man, I can't go in there.
I've got all that stuff.

Okay, listen, here's the plan.

We've got two tickets,
and there's three of us.

So I'm gonna go inside
with one of you guys.

The guy who comes inside with me
takes the two stubs, comes back outside,

Brings inside the guy who's
waiting outside. You got it ?

Why can't you wait outside ?

Yeah, why can't you ?

Because I have a ticket.

- Oh, that makes sense.
- Okay, yeah.

Okay, now to see who's coming in with me,
instead of drawing straws, we'll draw tickets, okay ?

So, kelso, you go first.

All right, I got one.

Damn !

Well,

At leastit was fair.

Jackie,

Are you sure you're
okay being here with hyde ?

Because I don't want you
to be sad the whole night.

I have a feeling I'm gonna miss
a lot of this game if you're sad.

Donna, please, okay ? I'm past
the sad stage in the breakup.

Now I just want
to make someone pay.

Like when your uncle diedand you were
sad, so you hurt people by firing your maid ?

Okay, donna, breaking up with steven
was the hardest thing I ever had to do.

I gave him my heart, and he stomped
on it. I can't pretend everything's okay.

Oh, and we didn't fire martina. We called
immigration and had them take care of it.

Thanks again for inviting
me over for the game, kitty.

Well, it'll be fun.

Red never lets me watch the game,
because one time seven years ago

The Packers won at the last
minute while I was in the kitchen.

Now I have to sit in the kitchen
every freakin' sunday.

Okay, kitty, I need the packers
to win by more than 7.

I got a hunsky
riding on it.

We call them hungarians now, bob.

No, I bet $100.

Hey, you want in
for $10 ?

Yes, please.

Oh, I feel like
a gangster's wife.

Ooh, how about
I get you some pretzels ?

I don't want to be
any trouble.

Oh, it's no trouble
at all.

You didn't
let me finish.

I don't want to be any trouble, but
I'm gonna need something hot.

Maybe something with refried beans
and a little cheese drizzled on it.

You put a little schnapps
in the hot chocolate.

Yeah, more like I put a little
hot chocolate in the schnapps.

You kids talking
about booze ?

Well, schnapp it
over here.

Eric, I think your dad's
been body-Snatched by a nice guy.

I know.

When the packers got a first
down, he actually hugged me.

It was, like,

It was, like, warm, like
I imagined it might be.

Hey,

Kelso,

Go bring in fez now.
You know the plan, right ?

Take my stub and your
stuband bring him in.

I got it, hyde. Jeez,
I'm not 2, you know.

Uh, what do I do
if I get lost ?

Dude, you're a cop.

Yeah, what good is
shooting somebody if I'm lost ?

Hyde, you're no help.

This is what
it's all about, huh ?

Spending time
out here, us men.

Eric, you should be
wearing a jersey. Here,

Go buy yourself one.

Whoa,

Dad, thank you.

Eric, please,

Only on first downs.

Wow, you actually got
food for everybody ?

How unnaturally
thoughtful of you.

Oh, don't worry.
I have an ulterior motive.

See, I got steven caramel corn,
but steven doesn't like caramel corn.

And he knows I know
he doesn't like caramel corn,

But I'm gonna
give it to him anyway.

- Wicked.
- Yeah.

Okay, boys,

I got you all
your favorite snacks.

Red, I got you a hot dog.

Donna,

I got you
three hot dogs.

And,

Steven,

I got you
caramel corn.

I don't like
caramel corn.

Oh, my !

Well, if I was still your girlfriend
and not just someone you couldn't see
a future with, I might care.

But I'm not, so I don'T.
Buh-Burn !

Hey, red.

Want to trade that hot dog
for the caramel corn ?

Yeah, sure.
I don't care.

Damn ! I forgot
about tradesies.

Now

I could have sworn there was some refried
beans right here behind my emergency bourbon.

Kitty, the game's on. I'll dip the
chips in crisco, whatever you got.

Aw, jeez !

I got you.

I wasn't falling, bob.

Oh.

Well, then this is awkward.

You can let go now, bob.

Where's kelso ?

Outside, of course.

Why ?

Um, we don't have
enough tickets.

How can
you not get this ?

Moron, how many ticket
stubs do you have on you ?

I have two, mine and yours,
which, and try to keep up,

Is why he's outside
and we're inside.

Okay, good. Now go take both
ticket stubs and bring kelso in.

But then how would
you get into the game ?

I'm already in the
game ! Now go !

Okay, okay. But you catch
more flies with honey.

Jackie wants to know

If you could take a picture of
her having the best day of her life.

Is she insane ?

Of course. What
are you, new here ?

Okay,

Steven, now that I'm single, I am
very, very attractive to other men.

And I don't want to make you
miserable or anything, but

I think I'm gonna start dating one
of those big, stinky football fans.

I'm single.

No, not you, cheesehead.

I mean...

Whoo,

Cheesehead !

Uh, forget it. Oh !

Why isn't this working ?
What is wrong with me ?

I don't know.

You don't have that normal
jackie thing that you usually have.

You know, most of the time, when you put
your mind to it, you can really hurt someone.

Okay,

Do you remember Ashley Caldwell when she
was talking about you behind your back ?

And then you told
all the other cheerleaders

The reason that she couldn't do
a split is because she had a wiener ?

Well,

Yeah, but, donna,

That was easy. I really
wanted to hurt her.

And you don't really
want to hurt hyde ?

Because you
still love him ?

Hey, some jerk's wearing
a bears jersey !

Let's all get together
and kick his ass !

Man,

All these guys are pissed off
at something, huh, dad ?

Dad ?

Who is this guy ?

Bears, boo !

- Boo !
- Boo !

Eric,

How the hell can you wear
a bears jersey at a packer game ?

Okay, maybe he doesn't
understand why it's wrong.

Let me tell you in a way
how you can understand.

The packers
are like the jedi.

And you're wearing
a go, darth vader jersey.

Uh, that's ridiculous.

The jedi don't play football.

They play manu-Ka.

Forman,

This is worse than when you wore the
air supply t-Shirt to the aerosmith concert.

For god sakes, will you just
take the damn jersey off ?

No. You know what ? I like rooting for the
underdog, okay ? I am the underdog in real life.

I like charlie brown. I like
the little engine that could.

I like the bears.

Excuse me, excuse me.

Hey, I'm back.

Uh,

Where's fez ?

Oh, I left him outside
like we always do.

But I like how you made him come in and out just
to make him think we weren't screwing with him.

Burn !

Kelso, we're not trying
to burn fez.

We're just trying to all
watch the game together.

Okay, this is kelso
you're talking to here.

All right, who's getting burned ? Is it me ?
Because if it is, I'll just let it happen.

No, no one's getting burned.
Now go out and get fez !

All right, fine.

I'll go get fez, and you
can just surprise me.

Okay, steven,

Certain people have implied
that I might still have feelings for you,

But I want you to know
that I don't. In fact,

Now that I'm single, I realize how big of a
loser you are, and I'm lucky to be rid of you.

So I'm gonna go and celebrate with
a giant gold-And-Green cotton candy !

Man, what the hell is her problem ?
She's ruining the football game.

I'm gonna go tell her where
she can stick that cotton candy.

This is a very angry
section we're in.

Very angry.

Oh, it's not that bad. I mean, I've been
wearing this jersey ten minutes, and

Nothing that bad
has happened.

Although I did
just sit in nachos.

Good one, red !

All right, kitty, I think we need to talk
about what happened in the kitchen.

Yeah, what the heck
were you doing, bob ?

I haven't been goosed like
that since we won the war.

I thought
you were falling.

I wasn't falling. Why would
you think I was falling ?

You said, "oh, jeez," and that's what
I say when I'm gonna fall. "Oh, jeez."

I just said that because I couldn't
find your damn refried beans.

And both hands, bob ?

I needed leverage.

Well, all I know is we have
to keep this a secret.

If red finds out,
he'll cut your hands off.

Fine,

We won't say
another word about it.

Although about it,
may I say bravo.

Jane fonda.

Hey,

- What happened with jackie ?
- Huh ?

Oh, nothing. I didn't find her.

You might want to go
to look for her, though,

By the snack bar.

Behind the pillar,
concourse "A."

Is that close to the
ice cream guy ?

I think so.

All right, I'll go.

Hyde, we need help.

This whole ticket thing
is like calculus to us.

Okay, kelso is outside
with two ticket stubs.

What ?

How did you get in ?

Oh, there's a hole
in the fence.

Come on.

Well, the bears have pretty much lost
the game, so why don't you get lost ?

Look, I think you've
made your point.

Yes, he's wearing
a bears jersey,

But he's my son.

Son or daughter ?

All right, that's enough !

No, you know what ? You can say
anything you want about me, okay ?

It's not gonna bother me.

Yeah, stay out of this, baldy.

Okay,

You can shut up
about my dad.

Oh, well, who's
gonna make me ?

I am.

No, wait,

I am.

Ooh ! Eric's in a fight !

No one's here !

No one's gonna believe me !

Why didn't I bring
my camera ?

Today was a miserable day.

Now I want to hire martina
back just so I can fire her again.

You know what might
make you feel better ?

If you go wait in the car, while
I go watch the rest of the game.

No, that's okay. You can come with me.

Great.

I'm vicious, all right !

I will tear that ass up !

Look at him go.

He's got the forman rage.

Get off of me !

Come on,

Let's go tell your mom
about our day. Oh, hey,

Where'd you learn all those
fighting moves, by the way ?

Spider-Man.

I had to ask.

Hey, donna, you know, fez and I are
free if you want tickets to a movie.

Sure.

But I only have enough money
for, like, two tickets.

No problem. I know this
thing we can do.

First, you take two tickets
and go inside,

And then we wait outside
and sneak through the fence.

Sounds foolproof.

We are gonna
burn fez so bad.

Well, this sucks,

'Cause before
we'd just kind of

Hang out, you know ?

Yeah,

Well, that was before.

Obviously, hanging out
doesn't work so well now.

Yeah.

Want me to give
you a ride home ?

No, that's okay.

I don't mind.

No, I'll walk.

But thank you.

I can't believe you sat on my
couch with cheese on your pants !

Okay, listen, mom,

Cheese on my pants
is just who I am now.

No more spending time with your
father. He's turned you into an animal.

I can't believe you
got into a fight.

You know, I'm thinking
about becoming a boxer.

They may have to invent
a whole new weight class.

Hey,

What's lighter
than a feather ?

A packer win, and the boy
defends the family name.

This is a great
day for the formans.

I touched your wife's butt.

I made $10.