All language subtitles for 19 - Samantha and the Troll

All done, Mommy.
Can we go play now?

Not until Adam
finishes his milk.

I'm gonna go out and get
the newspaper for Daddy.

And when I come back, I want
that cup of milk to be empty.

You understand, Adam?

Don't worry, Mommy.
He'll do it for me.

Adam. Go ahead,
Adam. Drink your milk.

Milk, up.

Go ahead. The rest is up to you.

I wanna go out and play,

and if you don't
empty that cup, I will.

Cup, go.

Tabitha, put that back.

Tabitha, that was
naughty and you know it.

It wasn't my fault, Mommy.

You scared me
and broke my spell.

You shouldn't be doing spells.

Honey, breakfast ready?

Uh-oh. In a few
minutes, sweetheart.

I'll get it.

We'll discuss this
later, young lady.

Now, I better clean this up
before your daddy sees it.

You turn the other way.

You too.

What's wrong,
Mommy? I don't know.

Never mind, Tabitha.

Now, why don't you
two go out and play?

And, Adam, you will have
two cups of milk for dinner.

Okay, Mommy.

Hi, little cousin.

I see you're still working
hard on housemaid's knee.

What's the matter? Super-boob
too cheap to hire a maid?

Just had a little accident.

And frankly, Serena, I prefer
to do things the mortal way.

Especially when your
witchcraft doesn't work.

Tabitha, will you please take
Adam out on the patio and play?

Okay. Come on, Adam.

Just a minute.

What was it Tabitha
snitched about?

I don't know what's wrong. I
seem to have a pooped twitch.

How long has it been
since you've had a checkup?

I mean, the full
10,000-spell overhaul.

Well, it's been a long,
long time probably.

Sam, that was Larry on
the phone, and for some...

For some reason, he
wants to pick me up.

And you can forget
about breakfast.

I've just lost my appetite.

Well, I see tall,
dark and nothing

is as nothing as ever.

Never mind, Serena.

Sweetheart, I think I
have a little problem.

I know. When did she get here?

Ding-dong, when
it comes to dense,

you go to the head of the class.

She's sick and she
needs a checkup,

and yesterday wouldn't
have been too soon.

My witchcraft has gone fluey.

It could be serious.
What can you do about it?

Well, I should go in for a
full checkup and rehabilitation.

Well, how long
would you be gone?

Oh, I should be
back by 9 tonight.

Serena, could you stay
with Adam and Tabitha?

Of course.

Sam, couldn't you get
Esmeralda or your mother or...?

There isn't time. Give
me a boost, Serena.

Weebus worbus Toodle-flick

Get a checkup or you'll be sick

Alone at last.

That must be Larry.

Do me a favour.
Uh, stay out of sight.

Sure, poopsie.

Good morning,
Darrin. Good morning.

Uh, hadn't we better
get going? We'll be late.

Darrin, how can you be late?

You're with the boss.

Uh, Larry, is there
some special reason

why you want me to
drive in to work with you?

Yes. My seat belt's broken

and I want you to
hold me in the car.

I finally arranged a
meeting with Mr. Berkley

of Berkley Hair Tonic
for this afternoon.

Forget it. Who needs
a hair tonic account

at a time when nobody
is buying hair tonic?

But that's the point.

When the sales are
slipping, opportunity knocks.

There's no way to go but up.

Let's make sure that the
client understands that.

You'll make that perfectly
clear, but not too clear.

And if there are any loose ends,

we'll sew them up
tonight at dinner.

Oh, that would be a good idea,

but I'm afraid Sam
and I can't make it.

Can't make it? You're the hosts.

- Forget it, Larry.
- Sam's not here.

She went out of town to
take care of something,

and, uh, she won't
be back till after dinner.

Sweetheart.

Let's go.

Hi, Larry. Sam?

Oh, Darrin, I'm so
glad I caught you.

Darrin, that really
wasn't worthy of you.

If you don't want the client to
come for dinner, just say so.

I don't want the client
to come here for dinner.

Sam, Louise is away
visiting her mother.

And if it isn't too
much of an imposition...

Imposition?

Oh, my goodness. Of course not.

We would love to have Mr. and
Mrs. Berkley here for dinner.

Wouldn't we, sweetheart?

Uh, Larry, why don't
you go along without me?

Oh, now, don't worry
about me, Darrin.

You and Larry run
along. That's right.

Let's run along, and fast.

I'll be home early. Very early.

I can hardly wait.

Aren't you forgetting something?

I don't think so.

Darrin, give her a kiss
goodbye and let's go.

How long have you
two been married?

Seven years.

Remarkable.

What's a gorgeous girl like
you doing in a face like this?

Oh! Fantastic!

Darrin, I talked to
Berkley a while ago,

and I think he and his
wife are going to accept

your gracious
invitation to dinner.

He should be here any minute.

You have something
dazzling to spring on him?

Well, not exactly
dazzling, but I do...

I think I have
something sensational.

"Berkley's Hair Tonic.

It makes your hair and your
love life easier to manage."

I don't like it.

- Mr. Berkley! Ha-ha-ha.
- Good to see you.

That slogan is
not for my product.

Of course it
isn't. It's old hat.

But I was just trying
to show Stephens here

an example of the
wrong way to go.

Well, that's right.
It's wrong. Heh-heh!

Uh, Mr. Berkley, this is
Darrin Stephens, our top man.

Nice to see you, Stephens.

Thanks for the
invitation to dinner.

A little short notice.

Hope the little
lady didn't squawk.

No, not at all.

Good. Neither did mine.

And believe me, she's
a great little squawker.

I understand you have
something exciting to talk about.

I am aware that your sales
have slipped considerably

and it's just because the
kids are not buying hair tonic.

It's a sign of the times.

Oh, that's very
astute. Very astute.

You've just told me what
my Research Department

told me six months ago.

Stephens, it is not your job

to report on the
state of the union.

Your job is to come up with
ideas which sell my hair tonic.

Yes! What I want is action.

And y-you're going to get it.

All I want is enough time
to come up with the plan

for recapturing
the youth market.

Okay, take all
the time you like,

as long as you come up
with an idea by tonight.

Gentlemen.

Oh, uh, by the way,

thanks again for the
invitation to dinner, Stephens.

Okay, sweetie. Adam's
down for his nap.

What kind of a game
would you like to play?

What's that noise?
It's the telephone.

There's one in Mommy
and Daddy's room.

Oh! Well, there's
one in here too.

Hello? Uh, hi, Serena.

I'm just checking in to
see if everything's all right.

Everything's fine.

It's your daddy.

Adam is taking his nap,

and Tabitha and I were
just about to play a game.

Game? What kind of a game?

Well, I thought it might be
fun to play Catch a Falling Star.

Serena, can't you play regular
games like other people?

I am not like other
people. Neither is Tabitha.

Serena, would you
do me a big favour?

It depends.

Is there any way you
can reach Samantha

and get her back here
in time for dinner tonight?

Nope.

When a witch goes in for
the 10,000-spell checkup,

she is incommunicado.

Say bye-bye to your
daddy. Bye-bye, Daddy.

I know a game we can play,
Auntie Serena. Hide-and-seek.

Neat-o! Well, we need a
whole bunch of us for that.

Oh. I bet they'd love to play.

And Prince and Panda and Fuzz.

And you too, Rag Doll.

There. This is gonna be fun.

Now, we are all going
to play hide-and-seek.

Scoot.

Come on, gang. Let's hide.

Here I come, ready or not!

Aaa-ooo!

Where is everybody?
Everybody hidden? Aaa-ooo!

Here I come! Oh, I'm looking.
I'm looking, but I'm not seeing.

Oh, my goodness.
You're such good hiders.

Oh, Rag Doll, Rag Doll, I
see you behind the chair.

Oh, and all the rest of you.

Oh, my goodness.
All right, all right.

And last one to
tag the base is it.

Let's go! I'm gonna
get you. Ha-ha!

Ooh, I'm gonna catch you,
you cute little furry things.

Here I come.

Serena.

Serena.

All right. Everyone
back where they belong.

There are some dolls
missing, Auntie Serena.

Serena!

Well, don't worry, sweetheart.
We'll find them later.

You bellowed, O Square One?

Serena, our guests will
be here in less than an hour.

How's dinner coming?

Wow-ee. What a worrywart.

I'm going to zap up

the exact dinner I once
cooked for Henry VIII.

Never mind, Serena.
Just something, uh, simple.

How about peanut
butter, straight, no jelly?

Is that simple enough?

How about salad, roast beef,
string beans and baked potato?

Believe me, it was more
fun cooking for Henry VIII

than it is for Ding-Dong I.

Serena, I'm going
upstairs now and get ready,

and I'd appreciate it if
you'd get with the dinner.

Haven't you forgotten
something? What?

Don't you give your
sweet little wife a kissy-poo

when you come home from work?

Forget it, Serena.

Look, dumb-dumb, I
am not a live-in maid.

I am a wife, and I want a kiss.

I've had more passionate
kisses from my mother.

Uh, look, Serena,

uh, when the client
and his wife get here,

eh, promise you'll behave.

I promise I'll behave.
Witch's honour.

And you'll be nice to
the client and his wife.

And I'll be nice to the client.
I don't know about his wife.

Just be nice.

Dumb-dumb, I
promised you I'd be nice,

and nice is what
you're going to get.

Oh, Darrin. Please come in.

Mrs. Berkley. How are
you doing, Mrs. Berkley?

- Good evening, Stephens.
- Mr. Berkley.

Oh, Mr. and Mrs. Berkley,
this is my wife, Samantha.

How do you...?

Oh. Uh, how do you do, Mrs...?

Berkley. Berkley.

How do you...? My.

Darrin certainly didn't
exaggerate, did he?

I didn't? Am I supposed to ask

what this is all about?

Oh, I couldn't tell you. It
would just embarrass you.

If you're going to pay him a
compliment, don't hesitate.

He can use it. My biggest fan.

Well, speaking of compliments,

anyone care for a
complimentary drink?

Anything. Double. Heh.

- Darrin.
- Well, come in.

Make yourself
comfortable. Well, thank you.

You too.

Well, come right in

and sit down and
make yourself comfy.

There you go.

You're not gonna
keep us in suspense.

What did your husband
tell you about Roland?

You want me to tell you?
What's the matter with Sam?

Only if you want
to. Nothing. Why?

I want to. Since
when does Samantha

greet the client with a kiss?

Mrs. Stephens, you're a very
affectionate person, aren't you?

Well, what's wrong
with that, Martha?

You're right, Mrs. Berkley.

I am a very affectionate
person. I just love people.

Don't you think people
should love people?

Listen to her, Martha.
It wouldn't hurt.

I've become terribly interested

in the, uh, new trend of
developing the senses.

Particularly touch.

Now... Now, tell
me, Roland. Yes.

Do you feel something?

Yours is a martini,
Mrs. Berkley, right?

Oh, yes. Mr. Berkley.

Yeah, yeah. Oh, yes.

Now, Martha, let's try.

Feel the warmth?

No, it's cold and wet.

I have always felt that...
That people should be nice.

Don't you think so, Roland?
Yes. Yes... Yes, I do.

Something else for you
to remember, Martha.

I have a feeling I'm
not going to forget

anything about tonight.

This new kick that Sam's on,
heh, I think she's overdoing it.

She's not herself tonight.

Well, why don't we come
back when she's recovered?

Oh, nonsense, Martha.

The world is an uptight place.

People don't express
enough warmth.

I think we should
let ourselves go.

Well, I'm for that. Let's go.

Oh, heavens, Mrs. Berkley.

Don't tell me you misunderstood
what I meant by "affection."

Ha-ha! Yes, Mrs. Berkley.

I mean, I hope you
didn't misunderstand

what Samantha
meant by "affection."

What did you mean?

Sam, why don't you let
me help you in the kitchen?

I think something's burning.
I think it's Martha. Hee-hee!

Come on, Sam. The kitchen.

Um, how about a
little kiss for the cook?

I refuse to serve
dinner until I get a kiss.

Well, I guess we're all
pretty hungry, aren't we?

Darrin, you kiss her.

Come on, Sam. The kitchen.

Serena, if you were a
mortal, I'd wring your neck.

Easy. Don't aggravate
my witchcraft.

Do you know what
you did in there?

You took a man who
represents a $500,000 account

and obviously played up to him.

You asked me to
promise to be nice.

I was, and he
seemed to enjoy it.

But his wife seemed
to hate it. Goody.

Hi, sweetheart.

The winds of adversity
got through to me

on the atmospheric continuum.

I got back as soon as I could.

All right, cousin.
What are you up to?

Oh, cousin, there
is no satisfying

this mortal oaf
you're married to.

He asked me to
be nice to the client.

I was merely being
nice to the client.

And my feelings are
hurt and I'm leaving.

What's going on?
Your beloved cousin

has been flirting
with the client

and driving his
wife up the wall.

What are you two trying to
do, sabotage the account?

Mr. and Mrs. Berkley are at
each other's throats in there.

Well, at least
they're still in there.

Yeah, but not for
long. I mean it, Roland.

I want you to take me home now.

Well, not before dinner,
for heaven's sakes.

That... That would,
eh, hurt her feelings.

Roland.

Wait a minute.

I believe that you're
actually jealous.

Jealous?

Of what? Of you and her?

What are you doing?
That's it, isn't it?

Tell the truth. You're a
little jealous, aren't you?

I'm not a little jealous. Oh.

I'm a lot jealous.

Oh, Martha.

Martha, that's the nicest
thing you've said to me in years.

Do...? Do you feel
something? Yes.

Okay, now we can go home.

Ooh.

Mr. and Mrs. Berkley,

I am terribly embarrassed.

Mr. Tate just told me that you
misunderstood my intentions.

I'm the one who's embarrassed.

I'm afraid I overreacted.

But you did react.

And that's the whole point
of sensitivity awareness.

You're doing very
nicely, Mrs. Berkley.

I am? Oh, thank you. I try.

Oh, you certainly
do, Mrs. Berkley.

Heh-heh! Now, let me
hold your hand again.

You feel something?

No, but I think I saw something.

Oh, that's no...

What is that thing?

What is it? Does
it bite? It's Harry.

Yes, it certainly is.

Oh. I... I... No,
not... Not hairy.

Harry.

Oh, Harry! Oh,
Stephens, wait a minute.

I think I know
what you're up to.

Is it okay if I, uh, guess?

It looks like you're ahead
of me, so guess away.

Yes. Now, you were,
uh, talking earlier

about a campaign
aimed at the young folks.

The, uh, longhairs, so to speak.

Harry is part of that
campaign. Right?

Fantastic guess. Ha-ha-ha!

Huh, Sam?

Huh? Oh! Phenomenal.

Mr. Berkley, under all
that hair is a boy actor

who will be playing
the "before" part

in the Berkley Hair
Tonic campaign.

I thought so. Ha-ha-ha!

He's cute. Yes.

Does...? Does he have fleas?

Oh, so sweet. Harry.

Give me a kiss.

Sensitive, is he?
Very sensitive.

Harry, Harry. Come on, Harry.

You forget how much you shed.

Come on, Stephens. Tell me,
how do you plan to use, uh, Harry?

Oh, well, Mr. Berkley,

uh, we... We don't
want the young people

to think that Berkley Hair
Tonic i-is against, uh, long hair.

No.

And we want to establish
that, in fact, you're all for it.

Right. And we also
wanna establish

that the young people don't
have to carry it to this extreme.

Yeah. How are you going

to, uh, illustrate the,
eh, better-groomed look?

Here's how it goes.

"Why look like this?

"With Berkley Hair Tonic
and a trip to the barber,

you can look like a prince."

I think you've got something.

The boy never
misses. Brilliant, Darrin.

It was nothing.

Just another one of
Darrin's hare-brained ideas.

Oh, Stephens, tell this young
man to take off his fur coat.

I wanna shake his
hand. He can't do that.

Why not?

Because he... He's
a Method actor.

He lives his part.

Well, it's past his bedtime,

so I'll just take
him on upstairs.

Sweetheart, you fix the
folks another drink, okay?

Great idea. Let's drink to my
signing with McMann & Tate.

I'll drink to that.

Oh, darling, I can hardly wait

to get back to our
sensitive awareness. Now.

Sam, I'd like to tell
you that I love you,

but somehow it doesn't
seem like enough.

It's enough. I'm not greedy.