All language subtitles for 04 - Mr. Monk Goes to the Office

[metal clanks]

[clank]

Whatcha doin'?

Flat tire.
Can you believe it?

Uh, no, I can't.

It's not your car.

What are you doing?

We'll let the cops
sort this out.

[gunshots]

You're paying me
for my advice, right?

Well, leverage everything.

Don't be afraid
of a little debt.

Ronnie!

Hello?

What's seven million bucks
between friends?

[laughs]

Hey, I'm losing you.
I'm in the garage.

Right,
I'll call you tonight.

Don't turn around.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Hear what I said?

Y-Yes.

Take my keys.

I don't want
your car, Kemp.

Give me your hand.

My hand?
Yeah.

Not that hand.
The other one.

Uhh, well...

No! No!

Aaaaah!

Have a nice day,
Mr. Kent!

Aah, ohh, gaaaah!

[Randy Newman ragtime theme]

* It's a jungle out there

* Disorder and confusion
everywhere *

* No one seems to care

* Well, I do

* Hey, who's in charge here?

* It's a jungle out there

* Poison in the very air
we breathe *

* You know what's in
the water that you drink? *

* Well, I do,
and it's a-ma-zing *

* People think I'm crazy
'cause I worry all the time *

* If you paid attention,
you'd be worried too *

* You'd better pay attention
or this world we love so much *

* Might just kill you

* I could be wrong now

* But I don't think so

* 'Cause it's
a jungle out there *

* It's a jungle
out there *

Man, did you
see that game?

Those guys
were just sleepwalking!

We need a real running back.
Barlow's done.

He's all washed up.

Amen.

They're talking
about football.

I have that one.

Give me the cards.

Mr. Monk,
you don't need the cards.

Just go talk to them.

You are
an interesting person.

Can't you just
be yourself?

Give me the cards.

[sighs]

Weather, politics,

movies, swear words--

Swear words?

Don't you
look at that one.

Here it is--football.

Okay, I got it.

I got it.

Hey.

Ah, Monk is here.

I guess we can
all go home now.

You guys talking
about last night's game?

San Francisco 49ers
lost 27 points to 21 points.

Yes, we know.

That was a hell
of a fourth quarter, though.

It was the turnovers.

They always come back
to haunt you.

Yeah, I was just saying Rattay
can't handle the pressure.

I mean, why didn't they
take him out?

Excuse me.

That's true
about Tim Rattay,

the quarterback.

But don't forget,

he won four out of
his last five home games.

But they were playing
in Houston, Monk.

You guys...
wanna hear some swear words?

Hey, Monk...

What are you doing?

We're just talking about
the local football franchise.

Mmm, all right.
The Niners.

Heh, no.

The San Francisco
Forty... Niners.

Come on.
Body's over here.

Yeah, sure.

I'll catch you guys
on the flipside.

[snickers]
[snickers]

[men laughing]

There it is.

Hearing them laugh
as I walk away.

That's the worst part.

Mr. Monk, they're not
laughing at you.

Yeah, right.

Victim "A,"
the garage attendant.

His name was Ronnie--

Uh, Ronald Shelton.
Shelton.

Guy worked here
for 10 years.

Shot twice in the chest
with a .45.

We recovered the shells.

Bang, bang,
he's dead here.

The shooter then
drags Shelton's body this way

and rolls him
under this truck.

Then he hangs out here
in the garage and waits.

For what?

For victim "B":

Warren Kemp.

He enters the garage
at 7:30.

Heads for his car.

Wow.

Sweet ride.

Yeah, I'm thinking of
getting one of these myself.

Meanwhile,
back on Earth,

the killer forces Kemp
over to the car--

at gunpoint,
makes him put his hand

in the car door...

and breaks it.

He killed the first guy,
then waited around...

but then only breaks
the second guy's hand?

His right hand.
Not his left hand.

He was very specific
about that.

And then he takes off.

Kemp recognize him?
No.

He didn't see his face.

Robbery?
Nope.

Why his hand?

Is he a musician
or a surgeon?

He's a big-time
stock analyst.

He works at one of
the financial places upstairs.

You know,
buyouts and mergers.

Money for nothing.

Is that Monk?

Yeah.

He's supposed to be
some kind of genius,

like Sherlock Holmes.

Who's the girl?

Uh, his assistant,
Natalie something.

[unzips purse]

What you got?

Well, this tire iron
is...metric.

It doesn't fit this car.

In fact, all the cars down here
are American made.

I think the killer
brought this down

to pretend
to change a tire.

Probably drives
an import.

Good, what else?
Tweezers.

Well, he's insecure.

He's always trying
to impress people.

Act tougher
than he is.

How do you know that?

He was chewing on this.

It's not conclusive.

(female officer)
Captain...

Just a theory.
C-could be wrong.

Yeah?
How's Kemp?

I can't release him yet.

Gotta get him
back to the hospital

for some X-rays.

But he gave me a message.

He said to tell you

that he can meet Mr. Monk
tomorrow morning

at his office,
10:00.

He says he hopes
to see you too.

Who, me?

Yes, Mr. Monk.

He's all the way to the end
and on the left.

Hi, Adrian Monk
for Mr. Kemp.

He's on a conference call.
You can have a seat.

I used to work
in a place like this.

I lasted about two weeks.

You do the same thing
every day.

The same thing.

After a while, you begin
to feel like a number.

A number.

You're just like
everybody else.

Everybody else.

You're basically
a drone.

A drone?

He's ready for you.

If you'll follow me.

[buzz]

Mr. Monk.
[grunts]

Warren Kemp.

Forgive me
for not shaking hands.

Oh, I don't mind.

It's Natalie, right?

His gal Friday.

[chuckles]
Something like that.

How's the hand?

Nine broken bones.

One more would have been
an even 10.

Well, you sound
disappointed, Mr. Monk.

Well, it's too late now.

Nice digs.
Yeah?

So this "buy low, sell high"
stuff really works, huh?

Well, apparently.

Wow.

What's that?

(Warren)
It's a voice scrambler.

Some of the transactions
I handle are top secret.

Security comes through
twice a week,

sweeping for bugs.

I feel like James Bond.

Please,
sit down.

Mr. Kemp, I understand
that the man that attacked you

knew your name.

That's right.

But you didn't
recognize him.

No, I never got
a good look at him.

Did you recognize
his voice?

No, sorry.

Any idea why somebody
would wanna...

break your right hand?

Are you about to sign
an important contract?

It would matter.
I can still sign my name.

I mean, if I make an "X,"
it would still be legal.

So you've been
moving furniture?

That's right!

I just hired
a new decorator.

Some feng shui nut.

She says if my desk
faces the door,

it would open me up
to new opportunities.

Maybe she was
on to something.

[giggles]

[both laughing]

How did you know
about the furniture?

Impressions in the rug.
The desk used to be there.

That's pretty good.

Who's the detective here?

[both laugh]

Mr. Kemp, uh...

Captain said that you
wanted to ask me some questions.

Mr. Monk, I'll admit it.

I'm scared to death.

I mean, this creep
knew my name.

It could be someone
close to me.

I agree.

And the police have
the building staked out,

but...I need someone
working here.

Undercover,
trying to figure it out.

I trust you.
I trust your judgment.

Can you...
recommend someone?

I'll do it.

What?

I'll do it.

Oh, thank you.
I feel better already.

You can start tomorrow.

No, no, no.
You don't understand.

He can't work
in an office.

There are people here.

Nah, nah,
he'll be fine.

I'll say you're
an investment analyst

I'm bringing in
from Chicago.

Chicago.

All you have to do is...
look busy.

I'll give you some
reports to collate.

Did you hear that?

I'm gonna be collating.

[Monk and Natalie giggle]

So you're from Chicago?

It's too cold for me.

Not that the weather here
is much better.

The kitchenette.

Some of the food
in that machine is still edible.

Office humor.
I love it.

Sales department's down there.
This is accounting.

We're redecorating
the whole office.

Do you smoke?

If you do, the smoke detector
in the break room's

usually broken,
if you know what I mean.

Isn't that kind of
a fire hazard?

I hope so.

If we're lucky,

this whole friggin'
place'll burn down.

Here's your parking pass.

If you park in the garage,

make sure someone
walks you downstairs.

We had a problem there
two nights ago.

Oh, I heard about that.

Why do you think someone
would wanna break Kemp's hand?

Probably someone
who heard him playing piano

at last year's
Christmas party.

[raspberry]

Oh, more office humor.
That's good.

This is you.

Home sweet home.

This is me?

It's perfect.

Yeah.

It's a dream
come true.

What are you doing?

This is Adrian Monk.

He's starting here today.

Mr. Kemp said I could
have that cubicle.

What's the difference?

It's closer
to the emergency exit.

Statistically,
it's a little safer.

Statistically,
you're a little nuts.

Why don't you double up
on your medication

and get back to work?

Ignore him.

He's a little...
[whistles]

So, we're all set.

If you have
any other questions,

don't hesitate
to ask somebody else.

Somebody else.

I get it.

We're taking up a collection
for Chilton Handy.

It's his birthday.
He's 40.

Oh, I...I just got here.

You work here, right?

Most people put in
10 bucks.

I put in 20.

Okay. Okay, then.

Here you go.

Wait...

You're Chilton?

That's right.

I'm turning 40.

Well, happy birthday.

What do you think
about what happened?

You mean to Kemp?

Well, it's
pretty strange, huh?

Breaking his hand.
Why would somebody do that?

Maybe someone didn't like
their last employee evaluation.

(Randy)
Captain, this just came in.

I think you better
sit down.

What is it?

I really think
you ought to sit down, sir.

I don't want
to sit down, Randy.

What is it?
It's pretty big, sir.

What is it?

Okay.

Sir, it's just that
when I got the call,

I was sitting down,
and I'm really glad I was.

Did somebody die?

Is anybody hurt?

I just got off the phone
with the S.E.C.

They're investigating
Warren Kemp for insider trading.

Is that it?

There's definitely
a leak.

And they're pretty sure
that it's coming

from inside the firm.

One theory is that
it's Warren Kemp himself.

But he was having
second thoughts,

so our guy breaks his hand
as a warning

to keep him in line.

And that's it?

Yes, sir.

And you had me
sit down for that?

No.

No, it wasn't
just that.

I mean, you looked
a little bit tired.

Is that my phone?

Your phone?

Disher. Uh-huh.

Yeah.
I gotta take this, sir.

Yeah, no, no, no.
I'm on my way.

Right, no.
Absolutely.

Uh, yeah.

Adrian, really,

you don't have to reorganize
the whole filing room.

Actually, I did.

And thanks again
for cleaning my office.

I can see my desk again.

You're gonna make somebody
a wonderful wife.

Oh, Greg, here's
that quarterly sales report.

I found a few typos
and grammatical errors,

so I retyped it.

Retyped the whole thing?
You're my hero.

So, where
are we eating?

Let's just go
to the Broadway Grill.

It's right across
the courtyard.

Come on, Adrian.

Come on, Annette.

[bell dings]

I'll get the next one.

There's plenty
of room here.

I'd rather wait.

You could fit
right here.

It's only two floors.

Okay, I'm--I'm fine.

I'll--

We're not contagious.

[laughs hard]
I know you're not...contagious.

I-I-I'll take
the next one.

[ding]

Mr. Monk.
I was worried about you.

How's it going?
Um, fine.
It's going good.

Oh, good.

All right, I just talked
to the captain.

The S.E.C. is investigating
this place.

They have a bank account
in the Cayman Islands.

Somebody's making millions
based on insider information.

Yeah.
They even have
this crazy theory

that Warren Kemp's involved.

Isn't that insane?

Come on, let's talk
about it at lunch.

Oh, I can't.
I'm meeting the gang.

What gang?
I have a gang.
I'm in the gang.

They're waiting for me.
Wait, what are you
talking about?

Natalie...
they like me.

I brought some cards along.
I haven't had to use them.

Nobody's laughing at me.
I gotta go.

I'll talk to you later.

Oh!
Oh!

Mr. Monk,
how's the case coming?

Any leads?
Nothing concrete.

I can't talk right now.
I gotta go.

The gang
is waiting for me.

[chuckles]

Mr. Kemp.

Warren, please.

So what are you
doing here?

I was going to take
Mr. Monk to lunch,

but he had other plans.

So...you're free.

Yeah.

Hmm.

Here you go.
Oh, thank you, Pamela.

Dig in.

Mmm.

Ohh.

Mmm. Mmm.
That was very good.

[giggles]
Delicious.

So...

Is it hard...
to work together

and--and be
in a relationship?

What?
What?

The two of you
are having a thing, right?

Why do you say that?

Well, your shirt...

There's a hole
on the end of your collar.

Greg was wearing
that same shirt yesterday.

Plus, you're using
the same shampoo

and the same deodorant.

And today, Greg walked in
with your umbrella.

Oh, ho, ho.
Ooooh.

[all laugh]

(Greg)
You should be

a detective.

No...no,
I couldn't be a detective.

I could never
be a detective.

They're lonely.
They're--they're very lonely...

and sad.

They don't have a gang.

A gang from the office.

[all laugh]

So this is how millionaires
do lunch, huh?

Ah, this is how
millionaires

become millionaires.

And divorced
and stressed out

and dateless.

[both chuckle]

Oh, I can see
my boss from here.

[chuckles]

He's laughing.

I hardly recognize him.

[chuckles]

Is that yours?

That's in Vermont.

Oh, it's beautiful.

Is it?
I don't remember.

I haven't seen it
in two years.

Warren, we gotta get you
out of this office.

The last time
I was in Vermont,

I was in jail.

What?

[both laugh]

I hit a guy in a bar.

He wouldn't leave
my friend alone.

So I just sort of
tossed him through the window.

If you're trying
to turn me on here...

it's working.

[both laugh]

Oh, my God.

I can't believe
I just told you that.

You cannot tell anyone
I've been arrested, okay?

Mr. Monk...my God,
Julie, my daughter.

If she knew--
please.

You have to promise me.

Oh, no, I promise.
Okay.

Now you have
to promise me something.

Yes.

That you'll keep calling
and reminding me

how pretty that cabin is...

until I can take you up there
and show it to you myself.

Okay...

[laughter]

Hey, Sherlock Holmes.

Come here.

We're trying to figure out
who did this.

This is a human
Caucasian buttocks.

Yeah.
[all laugh]

Yeah, we know.

But whose
Caucasian buttocks?

Gotta be Chilton.

Go to hell.

Uh, no, this is Ben.

Real mature, Ben!

Ow!

How'd you know?

Well, the staples
go out, not in.

Ben's is the only stapler
in the office set to do that.

What are you doing?

Taking this down.

The tournament's over.
You guys forfeit.

Who said that?
We don't forfeit anything.

It's our bowling league.
The finals are tonight.

Okay, fine.

I'll see you there.

But you're just gonna
embarrass yourselves.

Even worse than usual.

Mr. Kemp was the only bowler
you had that didn't suck.

Mr. Kemp bowls?

Not anymore.

Not with a busted hand.

Creep is right.
We're gonna get slaughtered.

Bowling.

Louder than
I thought it would be.

Do you really think
this guy...killed somebody...

and broke Warren Kemp's hand
just to win a bowling trophy?

I know it's crazy,
but look at him.

He's completely obsessed.

And not in a good way,
like me.

Plus, he's
a toothpick chewer.

Does he have an alibi
for Monday night?

Good question.

Adrian, you're up.
Me?

Yeah, we need someone
to fill in for Mr. Kemp.

Why do you think
we asked you to come?

Because...
I'm one of the gang.

Here's your shirt.
Find a ball.

All right.
Yeah.

You got this.
Good eye, good eye.

Find your ball.

Walk's as good as a hit.

Take it, take it,
take it.

All right.
You got this, Adrian.

Yeah!
Do this.

Yeah.

Bowl it down now.

[Chariots of Fire theme]

*

[all cheer]
Oh, yeah!

[cheering]

One more, it would have
been an even 10.

Oh, you get another chance.
You get two balls.

Really?

(Greg)
Go get it.

You're so slow.
I'm--

[team cheering]

Hey, did you watch that comedy
show on TV Monday night?

What?

Oh, it was about
this family

that argued all the time,

and the father
was always wrong.

You could hear
the audience laugh.

So you knew it was funny.

I missed it.

Where were you...

Monday night?

Did you go out?

Are you a cop?

No.

Then I don't have
to talk to you, do I?

So who's the girl
with Adrian?

Didn't you
get that e-mail?

Somebody's
been sending messages

to the whole office
about her.

Her name's
Natalie something.

She's been hitting
on Mr. Kemp.

You're kidding!
And get this...

She's done time.

She almost killed a guy
in Vermont.

Uhh!

Thanks.

[ring]
Hello.

(Natalie)
Everybody knows
about Vermont, Warren.

They're all
talking about it.

I told you that
in confidence!

Natalie, I didn't
tell anybody, I swear.

Well, somebody's e-mailing
your whole office,

and nobody but you
knew about it.

Natalie, you have
to believe me.

Like hell I do.

Mr. Monk,
we need to talk.

Natalie, look at this.

Chilton has an alibi.
He was here Monday night.

He bowled a 294.

I don't know
what to think.

Well, I think
Warren Kemp's involved.

What?
Maybe the S.E.C.
was right.

That it's an inside job.
Now, I do not trust that guy.

Well, I thought
we liked him.

I thought we
liked him a lot.

Well, we don't.

You know what?
I'll just meet you outside.

I gotta get some air.

Adrian!

We're only down two pins.

If you can roll three,
we can win the game.

No problem.

Foul!
That's a foul!

He can't wear those.

He's wearing street shoes.
They're not regulation.

But he's been
wearing them the whole game.

I don't care.

He can't bowl if he's not
wearing regulation footwear.

That's a rule.
Fine!

We'll just
rent him a pair of shoes.

What size are you?

Uh, here's the thing.

When you say,
"rent a pair,"

you're talking about
footwear

that other people
have already worn?

That's right.

On my f-feet?

H-h-here's the thing.

I don't like
to share...anything.

Fine. Let's just
buy him a new pair.

Pro shop's closed.
So what's it gonna be?

If he doesn't bowl,
you forfeit.

Here.
We're about the same size.

What the hell
are you looking at?

They're just shoes.

Just put 'em on.

Here's the thing--

Okay, stop saying,
"Here's the thing."

Just put on these shoes
for 20 seconds.

Then you can take 'em
right off.

20 seconds.

I don't know.

So you forfeit?

Listen...

We've been waiting five years
to beat these creeps.

All you have to do
is put on Greg's shoes

and roll the freakin' ball.

I can't.

Yes! Oh, my--
We win!

Yes! That's a forfeit!
We win!

Forfeit!
Forfeit!

Forfeit, forfeit,
losers.

[team laughing]

Hey! Hey...

I bought some...

I bought some bowling shoes.

I'll tell you what
you can do with those.

[whispering]
Put 'em up your...

That's a new one.

What do you think?
I'm sorry?

Which one do you like?

I'm doing the windows
and all the offices.

I'm trying to brighten up
everyone's spaces.

Which one?

This one I think is just
a tad bit more sunshiny.

Don't you think?

Yes, it's very sunshiny.

All right.

[sewing machine hammering]

What are you doing?
What do you want?

Okay, take anything.
Take anything you want.

You want that pillow?

Take that pillow.
It's Italian.

[muffled gunshot]

What does it mean,
lieutenant?

I think it means the killer
was very intelligent.

So it was the same guy
as the garage.

Yeah, it looks like it.

We recovered the bullets,
.45 caliber.

They're comparing it now.
Uh...

Something else, too, sir.

It's pretty big.

Don't worry,
you don't have to sit down.

I mean, you can sit.
I mean...sit or stand.

Can I walk away?

I'll just tell you.

The victim,
Angela Dirks,

she was
an interior designer.

We found some
recent invoices.

Guess what?

She was working for
Pross Financial Services.

The same company.

Yes, sir.

So the guy breaks

the boss' hand,

and then four days later,

he kills
the interior decorator?

What the hell
is going on up there?

But that's pretty weird about
the decorator getting killed.

There's gotta be a connection,
don't you think?

Mr. Monk?

That was our table.

We ate nachos.

You ate nachos?

No.

But I pretended to.

And then later,

Ben made a copy
of his Caucasian buttocks.

Which was very funny.

Although I don't know
exactly why.

Mr. Monk, it's their loss.
Really, it is.

They're all at
the Chinese restaurant.

Down the street.
I saw them sneaking out.

So I wouldn't
come with them.

Uh-oh, what is that?

What?
There's--
there's something--

Is that a hair?
Where?

No, it's okay.
It's just celery.

[teeth clenched]
Natalie...

I think I know
what happened.

What?
I solved the case!

Why are you
talking like that?

[teeth clenched]
You see that guy
by the window?

The guy
in the green jacket.

When I said there was
something in your soup,

he reacted.

He looked at his soup.

His suit?
His soup, soup!

Well, maybe he heard you.

No, he couldn't have.

He must have read my lips.

He can read lips!

That explains everything.

It does?

Yeah, he's been sitting
at that same table

every time
I've been in here.

He must have been sitting there
about a month ago.

At some point,
he looked out the window,

and he saw something.

Something worth
millions of dollars.

What?
What did he see?

He saw Warren Kemp.

He's been reading
Warren's lips!

From that table.

He has a perfect view
into Warren's office.

It's a company called
Maine Fiber Optics.

$32.50 a share.
Before September 2nd.

Buyouts, mergers...

That kind of inside information
is worth a fortune.

Don't look!
Don't.

He's staring right at us.

I'm sure everyone is,
the way you're grinning.

That's okay.
He'll just think we're in love.

You don't look
like you're in love.

You look like
somebody who's had

some sort
of industrial accident.

Here, just...

I don't get it.

Why would he break
Warren's hand?

[whispering]
Because Warren redecorated
his office last week.

Remember?
You noticed it yourself.

He turned his desk around,

so that when he held
the phone in his right hand,

he was blocking his mouth.

Somehow he had to get Warren
to switch hands.

That's what all this
is about?

So he would hold the phone
in the other hand?

Why would he kill
the decorator?

She was planning to put
curtains up, remember?

That would have
ruined everything.

Oh, my God.
Here he comes.

With this mirror, he could
have been reading my lips.

Think you figured
something out, huh?

What do you say we all

take a walk outside
and talk about it?

I'm gonna
grab the gun.

I can hear you.

I was born deaf,
but I'm okay now.

Modern science.
Now let's go.

Okay, okay,
we're going, we're going.

But you're making
a huge mistake.

Do you know
who this man is?

He's...

Aaaaaaah!

All right, don't move!
Stay where you are!

Don't worry.
It's okay.

I used to be a cop.

I'm calling the captain.

Now, wait, wait.
Could you...

Could you first call
Mr. Wok's?

Why?

That's where
the gang is eating.

I'd really
love them to see this.

Please.

I like the curtains.

Well,
they're temporary.

They're moving me upstairs
to the 15th floor.

Uh, away
from prying eyes.

Makes sense.

At least we know
who wrote that e-mail.

The killer must have been
reading our lips

when we talked about
going to Vermont.

[chuckles]

Guess he didn't want

his golden goose going
on vacation with anybody,

so he tried
to break us up.

Look, Natalie,
it doesn't matter

who wrote the e-mail.

I'm a bottom line
sort of guy.

And the bottom line is...

I told you
it wasn't me.

I swore to you.

And...you didn't
believe me.

You're right, you're right.

I'm sorry.

Can we just pop this open
and pick up where we left off?

It's expensive.
Don't waste it.

(Monk)
How'd it go?

Let's get
out of here.

[snickers]

There it is.

[laughter]

Captioning by Brian
at CaptionMax
www.captionmax.com