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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,010 --> 00:00:02,000 This programme contains very strong language 2 00:00:02,001 --> 00:00:03,401 from the outset and throughout. 3 00:00:03,402 --> 00:00:06,202 So, we stole 50 grand to pay for IVF... 4 00:00:06,242 --> 00:00:06,402 Does he know the money's missing? No. 5 00:00:06,403 --> 00:00:07,778 Does he know the money's missing? No. 6 00:00:07,802 --> 00:00:10,922 HMRC is sending some twat to conduct an audit. 7 00:00:10,962 --> 00:00:13,522 You better do something pronto about that laptop. 8 00:00:13,562 --> 00:00:14,402 Oh, ah, ah! 9 00:00:14,402 --> 00:00:14,682 Oh, ah, ah! 10 00:00:14,722 --> 00:00:16,282 Your ovarian reserve is low. 11 00:00:16,322 --> 00:00:19,882 To be honest, you'd be lucky to get 1 or 2 eggs from the retrieval. 12 00:00:19,922 --> 00:00:22,401 We don't know how to get the money safely into our account. 13 00:00:22,402 --> 00:00:22,762 We don't know how to get the money safely into our account. 14 00:00:22,802 --> 00:00:24,082 I'll take care of everything. 15 00:00:24,122 --> 00:00:26,122 I help you, you help me. How's your mother? 16 00:00:26,162 --> 00:00:27,282 Yeah, mum, listen, it's me. 17 00:00:27,322 --> 00:00:29,282 You're gonna need to change your phone number. 18 00:00:29,322 --> 00:00:30,401 What are you doing here? Gotta run. 19 00:00:30,402 --> 00:00:31,762 What are you doing here? Gotta run. 20 00:00:34,962 --> 00:00:37,002 Thanks for helping. 21 00:00:37,042 --> 00:00:38,402 I don't wanna generalise, 22 00:00:38,442 --> 00:00:40,362 but I just think blokes are better at certain... 23 00:00:40,402 --> 00:00:42,722 Jesus fucking Christ! Will you just make a hole! 24 00:00:42,762 --> 00:00:45,402 (GROANS, GRUNTS) Wow! There you go. 25 00:00:45,442 --> 00:00:46,402 So sexy watching you work. That's it, you smashed that. 26 00:00:46,403 --> 00:00:47,738 So sexy watching you work. That's it, you smashed that. 27 00:00:47,762 --> 00:00:50,322 Sally, my chair is fucked! 28 00:00:50,362 --> 00:00:52,562 Now, how am I supposed to deal with auditors 29 00:00:52,602 --> 00:00:54,401 when currently my head can barely see over the end of the desk? 30 00:00:54,402 --> 00:00:55,578 When currently my head can barely see over the end of the desk? 31 00:00:55,602 --> 00:00:57,482 It's like I'm auditioning for Snow White. 32 00:00:57,522 --> 00:00:58,842 I'm head of accounts. 33 00:00:58,882 --> 00:01:01,602 Chairs are not really my department. Yeah, just shut up, Sally. 34 00:01:01,642 --> 00:01:02,402 Er... Just where do you think you're going? 35 00:01:02,403 --> 00:01:04,882 Er... Just where do you think you're going? 36 00:01:05,722 --> 00:01:08,202 Oh, W-We were just... I was thinking we could just- 37 00:01:08,242 --> 00:01:10,401 Lunch. To lunch, yeah. We're going to lunch. 38 00:01:10,402 --> 00:01:11,418 Lunch. To lunch, yeah. We're going to lunch. 39 00:01:11,442 --> 00:01:15,722 Well, Janine is still very unhappy about the laptop that you lost. 40 00:01:16,562 --> 00:01:18,401 Now she'll be interviewing all senior management tomorrow. 41 00:01:18,402 --> 00:01:19,778 Now she'll be interviewing all senior management tomorrow. 42 00:01:19,802 --> 00:01:22,242 So, be here at 9am. 43 00:01:22,282 --> 00:01:24,202 And do not fuck this up! 44 00:01:24,242 --> 00:01:26,242 Actually, I hope you don't mind me saying, Alfie, 45 00:01:26,282 --> 00:01:26,402 but I do feel a bit like you stitched me up a little bit on that. 46 00:01:26,403 --> 00:01:28,738 But I do feel a bit like you stitched me up a little bit on that. 47 00:01:28,762 --> 00:01:31,322 But, I did initially feel like that, is what I meant to say. 48 00:01:31,362 --> 00:01:33,882 But now I don't feel it. I couldn't feel further away from that. 49 00:01:33,922 --> 00:01:34,402 So, leave it with us. 50 00:01:34,403 --> 00:01:35,642 So, leave it with us. 51 00:01:35,682 --> 00:01:37,202 Twat! 52 00:01:37,242 --> 00:01:39,562 (EXCITING MUSIC) 53 00:01:42,402 --> 00:01:44,642 OK, all ready for doctor. 54 00:01:46,082 --> 00:01:49,882 Is it just me, or are private clinics kinda creepy? 55 00:01:49,922 --> 00:01:50,402 (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 56 00:01:50,402 --> 00:01:51,002 (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 57 00:01:51,042 --> 00:01:53,202 ALL: Hmm... Yeah, they are a bit. 58 00:01:53,242 --> 00:01:55,842 You nervous about this at all? Yeah, a little. You? 59 00:01:55,882 --> 00:01:57,442 No. 60 00:01:57,482 --> 00:01:58,402 Well, yes actually. I'm shitting it. (SIGHS) 61 00:01:58,403 --> 00:02:00,058 Well, yes actually. I'm shitting it. (SIGHS) 62 00:02:00,082 --> 00:02:03,082 Don't worry. For once, you'll be wanking for a good cause. 63 00:02:03,122 --> 00:02:05,002 Sort of magical in a way, isn't it? 64 00:02:05,042 --> 00:02:06,401 I'm about to have my eggs harvested and you're gonna jizz in a cup. 65 00:02:06,402 --> 00:02:07,698 I'm about to have my eggs harvested and you're gonna jizz in a cup. 66 00:02:07,722 --> 00:02:11,082 So... not suuuper magical for me. 67 00:02:11,122 --> 00:02:12,962 Well, when you're a teenager, 68 00:02:13,002 --> 00:02:14,401 jizzing does actually feel... quite magical. 69 00:02:14,402 --> 00:02:15,042 Jizzing does actually feel... quite magical. 70 00:02:15,082 --> 00:02:16,442 Mmm. Especially the first time. 71 00:02:16,482 --> 00:02:17,962 I thought my head was gonna fall off. 72 00:02:18,002 --> 00:02:19,522 OK... Ooh. If you come with me, sir, 73 00:02:19,562 --> 00:02:21,882 I'll take you to your sample room. 74 00:02:21,922 --> 00:02:22,402 OK, great, thank you. 75 00:02:22,403 --> 00:02:23,802 OK, great, thank you. 76 00:02:24,602 --> 00:02:27,242 Have a magical time. Thank you, I will. 77 00:02:27,282 --> 00:02:29,762 (DOOR CLOSES) (CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYS) 78 00:02:29,802 --> 00:02:30,402 (CLEARS THROAT) 79 00:02:30,402 --> 00:02:31,402 (CLEARS THROAT) 80 00:02:38,122 --> 00:02:38,402 (SIGHS) 81 00:02:38,403 --> 00:02:39,962 (SIGHS) 82 00:02:43,042 --> 00:02:44,482 (PHONE RINGS) Oh God. 83 00:02:44,522 --> 00:02:45,842 (SIGHS) 84 00:02:47,602 --> 00:02:49,642 Shit! 85 00:02:49,682 --> 00:02:51,882 Kethan, I can't really talk right now. 86 00:02:51,922 --> 00:02:54,401 The number you gave me for your mother didn't work. What? 87 00:02:54,402 --> 00:02:54,522 The number you gave me for your mother didn't work. What? 88 00:02:54,562 --> 00:02:56,202 You'll have to give it to me again, innit. 89 00:02:56,242 --> 00:02:58,122 Yeah, OK. But I- I can't really talk right now. 90 00:02:58,162 --> 00:03:01,482 I just wanted to check you still want your instalments? Yeah, of course we do. 91 00:03:01,522 --> 00:03:02,402 (KNOCK) How are we getting on in there? 92 00:03:02,402 --> 00:03:03,162 (KNOCK) How are we getting on in there? 93 00:03:03,202 --> 00:03:04,802 Yes, fine, thank you. Thanks very much. 94 00:03:04,842 --> 00:03:07,282 We want the instalments. I'm just in the middle of something. 95 00:03:07,322 --> 00:03:09,882 (KNOCK)Are you on the phone in the sample room? 96 00:03:09,922 --> 00:03:10,402 Please just give me a few minutes, if that's alright? Thank you. 97 00:03:10,403 --> 00:03:12,498 Please just give me a few minutes, if that's alright? Thank you. 98 00:03:12,522 --> 00:03:15,282 So you want instalments but you're too busy. No, we're not too busy. 99 00:03:15,322 --> 00:03:18,401 (KNOCK)Did the doctor not explain what the room is for? I'm fine, thank you. Yes. 100 00:03:18,402 --> 00:03:18,762 (KNOCK)Did the doctor not explain what the room is for? I'm fine, thank you. Yes. 101 00:03:18,802 --> 00:03:21,458 I'm fully in control of what I'm doing. It's all in hand, thank you. 102 00:03:21,482 --> 00:03:23,602 But not like that. I'm not actually at that stage yet. 103 00:03:23,642 --> 00:03:24,882 Anyway, it's fine, thank you. 104 00:03:24,922 --> 00:03:26,401 Because I need a favour right now. 105 00:03:26,402 --> 00:03:26,442 Because I need a favour right now. 106 00:03:26,482 --> 00:03:28,602 You're going to have to take the day off work tomorrow 107 00:03:28,642 --> 00:03:31,162 to take a package to a... a breadren of mine in Jersey. 108 00:03:31,202 --> 00:03:32,682 Uh, I-I absolutely cannot do that. 109 00:03:32,722 --> 00:03:34,401 There's something going on at work. And I just... (CAR HORN) 110 00:03:34,402 --> 00:03:36,338 There's something going on at work. And I just... (CAR HORN) 111 00:03:36,362 --> 00:03:38,402 Oh my God. 112 00:03:38,442 --> 00:03:40,522 Just a lickle bag exchange in Jersey. 113 00:03:40,562 --> 00:03:42,401 You can make it a romantic day trip with your fox of a wife. 114 00:03:42,402 --> 00:03:44,018 You can make it a romantic day trip with your fox of a wife. 115 00:03:44,042 --> 00:03:45,642 I've already booked two tickets. What? 116 00:03:45,682 --> 00:03:48,202 I absolutely cannot do that. Oh, you can and you will. 117 00:03:48,242 --> 00:03:50,401 Otherwise, I might get quite forgetful about them instalments, innit. 118 00:03:50,402 --> 00:03:51,738 Otherwise, I might get quite forgetful about them instalments, innit. 119 00:03:51,762 --> 00:03:53,882 (KNOCK)We have more material, should you need- 120 00:03:53,922 --> 00:03:56,682 For God's sake, I'm on the phone to my uncle! 121 00:03:58,282 --> 00:03:58,402 Erm... sorry. 122 00:03:58,403 --> 00:03:59,922 Erm... sorry. 123 00:03:59,962 --> 00:04:02,202 Whatever it takes. 124 00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:05,082 (STAMMERS) That isn't what it takes! 125 00:04:06,682 --> 00:04:09,002 (DISTORTED BEEPING) 126 00:04:12,162 --> 00:04:13,402 Hey. 127 00:04:14,242 --> 00:04:14,402 How many eggs did we get? Well, we don't know yet. 128 00:04:14,403 --> 00:04:17,042 How many eggs did we get? Well, we don't know yet. 129 00:04:17,082 --> 00:04:19,562 (SLOWLY) But you did great. 130 00:04:19,602 --> 00:04:22,401 Thanks, children's TV presenter. How'd you get on? 131 00:04:22,402 --> 00:04:22,722 Thanks, children's TV presenter. How'd you get on? 132 00:04:22,762 --> 00:04:26,082 Initially, a bit stressful. But by the end, I thought I'd need a second cup. So- 133 00:04:26,122 --> 00:04:30,401 I'm very pleased to tell you... we have retrieved nine eggs! 134 00:04:30,402 --> 00:04:30,682 I'm very pleased to tell you... we have retrieved nine eggs! 135 00:04:30,722 --> 00:04:33,202 Nine eggs is incredible, right? It is. Yes. 136 00:04:33,242 --> 00:04:35,722 But since your womb lining is sub-optimal, 137 00:04:35,762 --> 00:04:38,401 I'm going to ask you to take progesterone in oil injections, 138 00:04:38,402 --> 00:04:38,922 I'm going to ask you to take progesterone in oil injections, 139 00:04:38,962 --> 00:04:42,202 which, I'm afraid, are, uh... extremely painful. 140 00:04:42,242 --> 00:04:43,962 Huh! Wonderful. 141 00:04:44,002 --> 00:04:46,401 It's very important that you take it easy 142 00:04:46,402 --> 00:04:46,442 It's very important that you take it easy 143 00:04:46,482 --> 00:04:49,322 before we implant the eggs. Your body's been through a lot, 144 00:04:49,362 --> 00:04:51,842 and so we need everything to be well rested. 145 00:04:51,882 --> 00:04:54,202 Understood. No active work. 146 00:04:54,242 --> 00:04:54,402 Just put your feet up and relax. Got you. 147 00:04:54,403 --> 00:04:57,122 Just put your feet up and relax. Got you. 148 00:04:58,282 --> 00:04:59,922 How about a trip to Jersey? 149 00:05:00,762 --> 00:05:02,122 What? What? 150 00:05:02,962 --> 00:05:05,722 ? THE DANDY WARHOLS: Bohemian Like You ? 151 00:05:07,162 --> 00:05:09,362 OK, I'm ready. Just stick it in. 152 00:05:09,402 --> 00:05:10,402 ? Woo! 153 00:05:10,402 --> 00:05:10,522 ? Woo! 154 00:05:10,562 --> 00:05:11,722 (WINCES) 155 00:05:12,882 --> 00:05:14,282 Get out, I'm gonna be sick... What? 156 00:05:14,322 --> 00:05:16,282 Get out, get out. Oh, uh, OK. Yeah, alright. 157 00:05:22,762 --> 00:05:26,042 Oh my God, maybe this is a mistake. No, no. 158 00:05:26,082 --> 00:05:26,402 This is just what the doctor order- 159 00:05:26,403 --> 00:05:28,082 This is just what the doctor order- 160 00:05:28,122 --> 00:05:31,002 Oh no, I don't even have the energy to be sarcastic at this point. 161 00:05:31,042 --> 00:05:32,522 Maybe this'll be nice. 162 00:05:32,562 --> 00:05:34,401 Once we... do the bag drop, it'll be quite relaxing, you know. 163 00:05:34,402 --> 00:05:35,938 Once we... do the bag drop, it'll be quite relaxing, you know. 164 00:05:35,962 --> 00:05:39,602 Like maybe it'll even... be romantic. I'm gonna be sick. 165 00:05:39,642 --> 00:05:41,402 I'm really going to be sick. Oh God. Erm... 166 00:05:41,442 --> 00:05:42,402 Here, use this. Oh, no, no, no. Not on the packed lunch. 167 00:05:42,403 --> 00:05:44,298 Here, use this. Oh, no, no, no. Not on the packed lunch. 168 00:05:44,322 --> 00:05:47,042 Oh my God, packed lunch? So, this day can get worse. 169 00:05:47,082 --> 00:05:49,202 (VOMITS) 170 00:05:50,682 --> 00:05:53,362 Sorry, Al. But I did say you should've stayed at home. No! 171 00:05:53,402 --> 00:05:56,202 No, we're a team, we're in this together. (SNIFFS) 172 00:05:56,242 --> 00:05:58,401 And you're sure it isn't just 'cause you thought I'd fuck this up if I did it on my own? 173 00:05:58,402 --> 00:05:59,578 And you're sure it isn't just 'cause you thought I'd fuck this up if I did it on my own? 174 00:05:59,602 --> 00:06:01,242 Not entirely. 175 00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:05,082 Well, just so you know, I smashed pulling a sickie. 176 00:06:05,122 --> 00:06:06,401 Sally bought it hook, line and sinker, so... OK. 177 00:06:06,402 --> 00:06:08,258 Sally bought it hook, line and sinker, so... OK. 178 00:06:08,282 --> 00:06:10,802 And Esme is gonna cover for us if anyone calls. 179 00:06:11,762 --> 00:06:13,162 (SIGHS) 180 00:06:13,202 --> 00:06:14,401 I need to make a phone call. (VOMITS) 181 00:06:14,402 --> 00:06:16,202 I need to make a phone call. (VOMITS) 182 00:06:18,922 --> 00:06:20,962 But why are you making this so difficult? 183 00:06:21,002 --> 00:06:22,401 You want me to lie, Deacon. I have principles. 184 00:06:22,402 --> 00:06:24,098 You want me to lie, Deacon. I have principles. 185 00:06:24,122 --> 00:06:26,762 You got fired from Nando's for putting THC in the peri-peri sauce. 186 00:06:26,802 --> 00:06:28,322 Let's not talk about principles. 187 00:06:28,362 --> 00:06:30,401 (LOW VOICE) Yeah, OK... So, what did you tell work? 188 00:06:30,402 --> 00:06:31,082 (LOW VOICE) Yeah, OK... So, what did you tell work? 189 00:06:31,122 --> 00:06:33,122 I said we were sick. With what? 190 00:06:33,162 --> 00:06:36,042 I didn't say. I just said we were ill, and I coughed a little bit. 191 00:06:36,082 --> 00:06:38,401 That sounds really vague and suspicious. Why'd you say that? 192 00:06:38,402 --> 00:06:38,522 That sounds really vague and suspicious. Why'd you say that? 193 00:06:38,562 --> 00:06:40,882 Well, this is the first sickie I've ever pulled, Esme, OK? 194 00:06:40,922 --> 00:06:43,522 Can you please just cover for us? Please? Hold on. 195 00:06:45,882 --> 00:06:46,402 Yep, fine. I might say you have something venereal. What?! 196 00:06:46,403 --> 00:06:49,282 Yep, fine. I might say you have something venereal. What?! 197 00:06:49,322 --> 00:06:51,842 I filled the bag. (VOMITS) 198 00:06:51,882 --> 00:06:53,202 (COUGHS) 199 00:06:53,242 --> 00:06:54,401 "Hi, you've called Deacon. Leave a message." (BEEPS) 200 00:06:54,402 --> 00:06:56,098 "Hi, you've called Deacon. Leave a message." (BEEPS) 201 00:06:56,122 --> 00:06:58,682 Fuckin' ball sex! Excuse me, Alfie. 202 00:06:58,722 --> 00:07:01,682 As we told you yesterday, we need to speak to Deacon. 203 00:07:01,722 --> 00:07:02,402 Yeah, that's not a problem at all. 204 00:07:02,402 --> 00:07:03,082 Yeah, that's not a problem at all. 205 00:07:03,122 --> 00:07:06,562 He's on his way and I'm just, uh... seeing where he's at. 206 00:07:06,602 --> 00:07:08,642 It would look very suspicious 207 00:07:08,682 --> 00:07:10,401 if as well as suddenly misplacing his laptop, 208 00:07:10,402 --> 00:07:11,162 if as well as suddenly misplacing his laptop, 209 00:07:11,202 --> 00:07:12,842 he also didn't turn up to the interview. 210 00:07:12,882 --> 00:07:14,962 Oh (CHUCKLES) tell me about it. 211 00:07:19,042 --> 00:07:20,762 (LIVELY MUSIC) 212 00:07:20,802 --> 00:07:22,682 (HORN BLARES) 213 00:07:24,442 --> 00:07:26,401 See? This is more like it, isn't it? Now we can properly relax. 214 00:07:26,402 --> 00:07:27,418 See? This is more like it, isn't it? Now we can properly relax. 215 00:07:27,442 --> 00:07:29,122 Not yet, I still feel seasick. 216 00:07:29,162 --> 00:07:31,762 Well, that'll pass, I promise. (PHONE CHIMES)(GROANS) 217 00:07:32,562 --> 00:07:34,401 Oh, is that Alfie again? Yeah. 218 00:07:34,402 --> 00:07:35,562 Oh, is that Alfie again? Yeah. 219 00:07:35,922 --> 00:07:38,722 But look, don't worry, he's saying he's totally fine with us being off 220 00:07:38,762 --> 00:07:41,242 and he's gonna handle the audit. So don't worry. 221 00:07:41,282 --> 00:07:42,401 So, you know, turn your phone off and just relax. 222 00:07:42,402 --> 00:07:44,018 So, you know, turn your phone off and just relax. 223 00:07:44,042 --> 00:07:48,322 Mmm. Lovely. Just the illegal bag exchange then. 224 00:07:48,362 --> 00:07:50,282 Well, Kethan's gonna text us the location. 225 00:07:50,322 --> 00:07:50,402 So, how about... little suggestion... 226 00:07:50,403 --> 00:07:52,362 So, how about... little suggestion... 227 00:07:52,402 --> 00:07:54,362 before that, we do something nice? 228 00:07:54,402 --> 00:07:57,362 OK. What do you have in mind? Well, I'm totally chill. Chill Bill. 229 00:07:57,402 --> 00:07:58,402 So, just whatever's best for you. 230 00:07:58,402 --> 00:07:59,362 So, just whatever's best for you. 231 00:07:59,402 --> 00:08:01,802 So, you choose.(GASPS) OK, can we go see the castle? 232 00:08:01,842 --> 00:08:04,642 Hey do you remember when I pretended to be Meghan Markle's best friend 233 00:08:04,682 --> 00:08:06,401 on the Windsor Castle tour? (PHONE CHIMES) I do remember that. 234 00:08:06,402 --> 00:08:07,282 On the Windsor Castle tour? (PHONE CHIMES) I do remember that. 235 00:08:07,322 --> 00:08:09,522 I remember you telling the guy Meghan was disappointed 236 00:08:09,562 --> 00:08:11,802 Archie's skin wasn't darker. For a laugh. Yeah.Yeah. 237 00:08:11,842 --> 00:08:14,242 Erm... I've got another suggestion. Yeah? 238 00:08:14,282 --> 00:08:14,402 How about, instead of going to the castle, 239 00:08:14,403 --> 00:08:16,322 How about, instead of going to the castle, 240 00:08:16,362 --> 00:08:18,482 erm, we go on a different walk 241 00:08:18,522 --> 00:08:21,082 that takes us to where the bag swap's gonna be happening, 242 00:08:21,122 --> 00:08:22,401 because Kethan's just texted to say we have to go right now. 243 00:08:22,402 --> 00:08:24,458 Because Kethan's just texted to say we have to go right now. 244 00:08:24,482 --> 00:08:28,002 Yay! Let's go, come on. (TUTS) I wanna see the castle. 245 00:08:28,042 --> 00:08:29,362 It'll be great. 246 00:08:29,402 --> 00:08:30,402 Where the hell is Deacon? 247 00:08:30,402 --> 00:08:31,042 Where the hell is Deacon? 248 00:08:31,082 --> 00:08:33,682 I told him, even if he was dead, that he had to be in here today. 249 00:08:33,722 --> 00:08:34,842 So, where is he? 250 00:08:34,882 --> 00:08:38,082 Again, it's not really my department. But he's not here. 251 00:08:38,122 --> 00:08:38,402 (SHOUTS) I know your f- 252 00:08:38,403 --> 00:08:39,642 (SHOUTS) I know your f- 253 00:08:39,682 --> 00:08:41,602 (WHISPERS) I know he's not here. 254 00:08:41,642 --> 00:08:44,402 So, why don't you go to his house and fucking get him here? 255 00:08:44,442 --> 00:08:45,802 (SIGHS) 256 00:08:45,842 --> 00:08:46,402 And hey... enough with the flirting. 257 00:08:46,403 --> 00:08:48,522 And hey... enough with the flirting. 258 00:08:49,682 --> 00:08:52,362 Why didn't we just take a taxi? 259 00:08:52,402 --> 00:08:53,922 Well, I thought it would be like 260 00:08:53,962 --> 00:08:54,402 those romantic walks we did on our honeymoon.(SIGHS) 261 00:08:54,403 --> 00:08:56,722 those romantic walks we did on our honeymoon.(SIGHS) 262 00:08:56,762 --> 00:08:59,922 Well, why try to add something romantic to a probable drug run? 263 00:08:59,962 --> 00:09:02,082 Why don't we just get it done and think romance after? 264 00:09:02,122 --> 00:09:02,402 Well, I was actually thinking... And I don't want any arguments on this... 265 00:09:02,403 --> 00:09:05,138 Well, I was actually thinking... And I don't want any arguments on this... 266 00:09:05,162 --> 00:09:07,762 You're supposed to be relaxing, and more importantly than that, 267 00:09:07,802 --> 00:09:09,882 I wanna show you that I can take care of things. 268 00:09:09,922 --> 00:09:10,402 Handle things on my own. There's a cafe over there. 269 00:09:10,403 --> 00:09:13,202 Handle things on my own. There's a cafe over there. 270 00:09:13,242 --> 00:09:16,362 You head in there, have a chillax. I'll go ahead and do the bag swap. 271 00:09:16,402 --> 00:09:18,362 Alright? No argum- Good luck. 272 00:09:19,522 --> 00:09:22,842 Well, I was sort of expecting... one argument. 273 00:09:23,962 --> 00:09:26,401 Alright, well, I'm gonna go take care of this dangerous bag swap on my own. 274 00:09:26,402 --> 00:09:29,362 Alright, well, I'm gonna go take care of this dangerous bag swap on my own. 275 00:09:31,842 --> 00:09:33,842 (TENSE MUSIC) 276 00:09:38,362 --> 00:09:40,162 Bloody hell. 277 00:09:49,762 --> 00:09:50,402 (CALLS OUT) Hello? 278 00:09:50,402 --> 00:09:51,362 (CALLS OUT) Hello? 279 00:09:51,402 --> 00:09:53,002 Is there anybody there? 280 00:09:53,802 --> 00:09:55,722 I've just come to exchange the bags, 281 00:09:55,762 --> 00:09:57,922 if there is anybody there. 282 00:10:00,922 --> 00:10:03,482 Erm, y-you probably don't want me to see your face, 283 00:10:03,522 --> 00:10:05,562 so I-I'm just gonna swap the bags. 284 00:10:05,602 --> 00:10:06,402 But I've just got to get my packed lunch from this bag 285 00:10:06,403 --> 00:10:07,818 But I've just got to get my packed lunch from this bag 286 00:10:07,842 --> 00:10:09,682 a- and move it to the other one. 287 00:10:10,562 --> 00:10:13,002 Just so there are no misunderstandings. 288 00:10:15,082 --> 00:10:17,482 OK, y-you can have the packed lunch. 289 00:10:24,360 --> 00:10:26,200 Wait! GIRL: Don't turn around. 290 00:10:26,240 --> 00:10:27,360 I- I won't. 291 00:10:28,560 --> 00:10:29,240 How old are you? 292 00:10:29,240 --> 00:10:30,120 How old are you? 293 00:10:30,160 --> 00:10:31,920 That's a really creepy question. 294 00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:34,640 Are you a paedo? What?! No, I'm not a paedo. 295 00:10:34,680 --> 00:10:36,680 Why are you so obsessed with my age then? 296 00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:37,240 I know your sort. Wha-? I'm not any "sort". 297 00:10:37,241 --> 00:10:38,616 I know your sort. Wha-? I'm not any "sort". 298 00:10:38,640 --> 00:10:40,280 Can't you ask a kid their age anymore? 299 00:10:40,320 --> 00:10:41,560 I better get Uncle Dave. 300 00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:44,040 If it's one thing Dave hates, it's a nonce. 301 00:10:44,080 --> 00:10:45,239 What? I am NOT a nonce. OK? 302 00:10:45,240 --> 00:10:45,880 What? I am NOT a nonce. OK? 303 00:10:45,920 --> 00:10:48,200 If anything, a nonce wouldn't be interested in your age. 304 00:10:48,240 --> 00:10:49,400 I'm the opposite of a nonce. 305 00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:51,000 You know a lot about nonces, don't you? 306 00:10:51,040 --> 00:10:52,560 You know what? I'm gonna stop talking 307 00:10:52,600 --> 00:10:53,240 because you're twisting everything I say. Please just listen. 308 00:10:53,241 --> 00:10:55,616 Because you're twisting everything I say. Please just listen. 309 00:10:55,640 --> 00:10:57,560 (CLICK) No. Listen to me, nonce. 310 00:10:57,600 --> 00:10:59,600 (TENSE MUSIC) 311 00:11:02,840 --> 00:11:05,120 Erm... I'm listening. 312 00:11:06,400 --> 00:11:08,800 Hello? Oh, hello, sweetie. 313 00:11:08,840 --> 00:11:09,240 Handling this all OK on your own? Oh, thank God. 314 00:11:09,241 --> 00:11:10,896 Handling this all OK on your own? Oh, thank God. 315 00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:13,520 Don't turn around. Don't you turn around. 316 00:11:13,560 --> 00:11:15,240 So check it out boss, baby... 317 00:11:15,280 --> 00:11:17,239 We're gonna have a nice calm chat for a second. 318 00:11:17,240 --> 00:11:17,600 We're gonna have a nice calm chat for a second. 319 00:11:17,640 --> 00:11:20,280 Allison, you need to be very, very careful, OK? 320 00:11:20,320 --> 00:11:23,080 She has got a gun. No, the toddler has a nail gun. 321 00:11:23,120 --> 00:11:25,239 But I have an ACTUAL gun, so look... 322 00:11:25,240 --> 00:11:25,560 But I have an ACTUAL gun, so look... 323 00:11:25,600 --> 00:11:28,560 My husband here-Are you telling me you married this perv? 324 00:11:28,600 --> 00:11:30,240 Yes. I married this perv. 325 00:11:30,280 --> 00:11:32,480 Well, perv is actually better than nonce, so thank you. 326 00:11:32,520 --> 00:11:33,240 My husband is doing a simple bag exchange. 327 00:11:33,241 --> 00:11:35,840 My husband is doing a simple bag exchange. 328 00:11:35,880 --> 00:11:37,320 We were sent by Kethan. 329 00:11:38,160 --> 00:11:41,040 Oh. Why didn't you say so? 330 00:11:41,080 --> 00:11:41,240 Did you not hear me shouting? You didn't say where you were from. 331 00:11:41,241 --> 00:11:44,040 Did you not hear me shouting? You didn't say where you were from. 332 00:11:44,080 --> 00:11:45,880 (SIGHS) Jesus, Deacon! Didn't I? 333 00:11:45,920 --> 00:11:47,640 That's like bag drop rule number one. 334 00:11:47,680 --> 00:11:48,920 OK, you guys can go. 335 00:11:48,960 --> 00:11:49,240 Well, I've turned up with a bag identical 336 00:11:49,241 --> 00:11:50,616 Well, I've turned up with a bag identical 337 00:11:50,640 --> 00:11:52,040 to the one you're waiting to swap. 338 00:11:52,080 --> 00:11:54,760 How likely is that to be a coincidence, you little psychopath? 339 00:11:55,600 --> 00:11:57,080 What's your name? 340 00:11:57,120 --> 00:11:57,240 I think we're past intros, Allison. Let's just go. 341 00:11:57,241 --> 00:11:59,136 I think we're past intros, Allison. Let's just go. 342 00:11:59,160 --> 00:12:00,640 Casey. Why? 343 00:12:00,680 --> 00:12:01,880 Yes, why? 344 00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:03,680 Casey, what are you doing here? 345 00:12:03,720 --> 00:12:05,239 My Uncle Dave is in the business. 346 00:12:05,240 --> 00:12:05,800 My Uncle Dave is in the business. 347 00:12:05,840 --> 00:12:08,360 Now and again he gives me pocket money to look after the place. 348 00:12:08,400 --> 00:12:10,560 It's no biggy. Well, how old are you? 349 00:12:10,600 --> 00:12:12,280 Don't ask her that, it's a trigger for her. 350 00:12:12,320 --> 00:12:13,240 13. 351 00:12:13,240 --> 00:12:14,120 13. 352 00:12:14,160 --> 00:12:16,480 Casey, I know I don't know you very well, 353 00:12:16,520 --> 00:12:18,440 but you remind me of my little sister, 354 00:12:18,480 --> 00:12:20,360 and... you need to look after yourself. 355 00:12:20,400 --> 00:12:21,240 This is no place for a kid your age. 356 00:12:21,241 --> 00:12:22,681 This is no place for a kid your age. 357 00:12:23,720 --> 00:12:25,720 Yeah. You're right. 358 00:12:26,880 --> 00:12:28,480 Thanks. 359 00:12:28,520 --> 00:12:29,240 That's OK. 360 00:12:29,240 --> 00:12:30,240 That's OK. 361 00:12:30,960 --> 00:12:32,200 Uncle Dave? 362 00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:34,400 Some pervs are trying to steal your bag! What? 363 00:12:34,440 --> 00:12:36,320 I knew it. She hates it when you ask her age. 364 00:12:36,360 --> 00:12:37,240 Fuck's wrong with you, little bitch? Allison, get the gun. 365 00:12:37,241 --> 00:12:38,816 Fuck's wrong with you, little bitch? Allison, get the gun. 366 00:12:38,840 --> 00:12:41,040 Where the fuck would I get a gun? It's a stick, Deacon. 367 00:12:41,080 --> 00:12:43,040 Who the fuck are you? Oh my God, run! Oh shit! 368 00:12:43,080 --> 00:12:45,239 Run, run, run, run, run! 369 00:12:45,240 --> 00:12:45,480 Run, run, run, run, run! 370 00:12:45,520 --> 00:12:46,800 (SCREAMS) (SHOUTS) 371 00:12:46,840 --> 00:12:48,960 Fucking nonce. Come here, you're dead. 372 00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:50,600 I'm not a nonce! 373 00:12:51,640 --> 00:12:53,160 Right, up here, come on. 374 00:12:53,200 --> 00:12:53,238 (MIMICS) "..feet up, try to relax, 375 00:12:53,239 --> 00:12:54,720 (MIMICS) "..feet up, try to relax, 376 00:12:54,760 --> 00:12:56,920 I'll look after everything, it'll be romantic(!)" 377 00:12:56,960 --> 00:12:59,240 (PANTS) You wanted to go the castle, didn't you? 378 00:12:59,280 --> 00:13:01,239 ? JET: Are You Gonna Be My Girl ? 379 00:13:01,240 --> 00:13:02,560 ? JET: Are You Gonna Be My Girl ? 380 00:13:03,960 --> 00:13:06,320 (INDISTINCT SHOUTING) 381 00:13:09,560 --> 00:13:10,720 Come on! 382 00:13:10,760 --> 00:13:13,520 Well, thank God there's not many stair-free corridors 383 00:13:13,560 --> 00:13:15,400 in this fucking castle! 384 00:13:15,440 --> 00:13:16,800 Come on. You go. 385 00:13:16,840 --> 00:13:17,240 No, come on. But I can't, I can't. 386 00:13:17,241 --> 00:13:19,560 No, come on. But I can't, I can't. 387 00:13:25,840 --> 00:13:28,040 (SONG FADES) 388 00:13:28,880 --> 00:13:30,480 (DOOR KNOCK) 389 00:13:30,520 --> 00:13:32,120 (SIGHS) 390 00:13:33,360 --> 00:13:35,120 (SIGHS) 391 00:13:35,160 --> 00:13:36,840 Hello. Oh, hello. 392 00:13:36,880 --> 00:13:39,800 I was wondering if I could speak to Deacon? 393 00:13:39,840 --> 00:13:41,239 No, he's out. 394 00:13:41,240 --> 00:13:41,320 No, he's out. 395 00:13:41,360 --> 00:13:43,080 Oh, is he? 396 00:13:43,120 --> 00:13:45,160 No, he's... sick. 397 00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:47,760 I thought you said he was out. Cold. 398 00:13:47,800 --> 00:13:49,239 What? Out cold. He can't speak, sorry. 399 00:13:49,240 --> 00:13:50,616 What? Out cold. He can't speak, sorry. 400 00:13:50,640 --> 00:13:52,280 Bye! (CHUCKLES) 401 00:13:53,960 --> 00:13:55,360 Yeah. 402 00:13:59,160 --> 00:14:02,120 They're not here. What do you mean he's not here? He is here. 403 00:14:02,160 --> 00:14:04,520 Can't see 'em. What do you mean you can't see them? 404 00:14:04,560 --> 00:14:05,240 I think they're giving up. But we're gonna miss the ferry. 405 00:14:05,241 --> 00:14:07,256 I think they're giving up. But we're gonna miss the ferry. 406 00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:08,960 (SIGHS) Well, we'll get the next one. 407 00:14:10,080 --> 00:14:11,640 (SIGHS) 408 00:14:11,680 --> 00:14:13,239 Do you know what? (SIGHS) 409 00:14:13,240 --> 00:14:14,240 Do you know what? (SIGHS) 410 00:14:14,640 --> 00:14:16,280 What are you doing? Well... 411 00:14:16,320 --> 00:14:19,200 Look, I said we were gonna have a... romantic... 412 00:14:20,000 --> 00:14:21,239 ..and relaxing time. 413 00:14:21,240 --> 00:14:21,760 ..and relaxing time. 414 00:14:21,800 --> 00:14:24,280 That's exactly what we're going to do. So... 415 00:14:24,320 --> 00:14:26,200 (SIGHS) (GROANS) 416 00:14:26,240 --> 00:14:27,720 (SIGHS) 417 00:14:27,760 --> 00:14:29,239 Got a nice view. Got our own castle. 418 00:14:29,240 --> 00:14:30,616 Got a nice view. Got our own castle. 419 00:14:30,640 --> 00:14:32,520 (WHISPERS) Yeah. (STRAINS) And... 420 00:14:32,560 --> 00:14:33,800 (SIGHS) 421 00:14:33,840 --> 00:14:36,760 Yeah? Packed lunch! 422 00:14:36,800 --> 00:14:37,240 Huh? 423 00:14:37,241 --> 00:14:38,320 Huh? 424 00:14:39,120 --> 00:14:41,080 Such a great guy. 425 00:14:45,320 --> 00:14:48,040 Thank you for rescuing me... back there. 426 00:14:48,080 --> 00:14:49,680 Although it does sort of prove the point 427 00:14:49,720 --> 00:14:51,960 that you don't trust me to sort shit out on my own. 428 00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:53,239 Neither of us can do this on our own. 429 00:14:53,240 --> 00:14:53,800 Neither of us can do this on our own. 430 00:14:53,840 --> 00:14:55,520 I thought that's pretty obvious by now. 431 00:14:55,560 --> 00:14:57,200 No, you're right. 432 00:14:57,240 --> 00:15:00,000 I mean, right now, your tiny thimble of sperm 433 00:15:00,040 --> 00:15:01,239 is being mixed with my under-performing eggs 434 00:15:01,240 --> 00:15:02,496 is being mixed with my under-performing eggs 435 00:15:02,520 --> 00:15:05,640 and we COULD be parents soon. So, we have to work together. 436 00:15:06,560 --> 00:15:08,840 No, I know. You're right. 437 00:15:08,880 --> 00:15:09,240 You are right. (SIGHS) 438 00:15:09,241 --> 00:15:12,040 You are right. (SIGHS) 439 00:15:13,040 --> 00:15:14,840 (SIGHS) This actually quite nice. 440 00:15:14,880 --> 00:15:16,520 It really is. 441 00:15:16,560 --> 00:15:17,240 I mean, if you block out that we're being chased 442 00:15:17,241 --> 00:15:18,776 I mean, if you block out that we're being chased 443 00:15:18,800 --> 00:15:21,440 by a psycho teen and her gang of heavies.Mmm. 444 00:15:21,480 --> 00:15:23,600 Then this is actually quite nice. 445 00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:25,239 (MOUTH FULL) Mmm. it really is. 446 00:15:25,240 --> 00:15:26,480 (MOUTH FULL) Mmm. it really is. 447 00:15:27,080 --> 00:15:29,000 (DISTANT) I'm done, finished, finished. 448 00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:31,040 Giving up? Yeah, come on. 449 00:15:33,760 --> 00:15:36,200 "You've called Deacon. Leave a message." (BEEPS)Grr! 450 00:15:36,240 --> 00:15:37,840 He's stupid! 451 00:15:37,880 --> 00:15:40,240 Hello again. Hi! 452 00:15:41,080 --> 00:15:41,240 I- I'm sorry about the, er... 453 00:15:41,241 --> 00:15:43,280 I- I'm sorry about the, er... 454 00:15:43,320 --> 00:15:45,520 Complete lack of assistance or transparency? 455 00:15:46,360 --> 00:15:47,800 Well, if you just let me explain. 456 00:15:47,840 --> 00:15:49,239 Nothing to explain. I'm done. 457 00:15:49,240 --> 00:15:50,000 Nothing to explain. I'm done. 458 00:15:50,040 --> 00:15:52,080 Really? Yes. 459 00:15:52,120 --> 00:15:54,800 And I shall be taking over. 460 00:15:55,640 --> 00:15:57,239 With staff withholding evidence 461 00:15:57,240 --> 00:15:57,640 With staff withholding evidence 462 00:15:57,680 --> 00:16:00,520 and one literally running away, 463 00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:03,880 this has been escalated to an official fraud investigation. 464 00:16:03,920 --> 00:16:05,239 So you... shall be seeing a lot more of me, Mr Bower. 465 00:16:05,240 --> 00:16:08,240 So you... shall be seeing a lot more of me, Mr Bower. 466 00:16:08,280 --> 00:16:09,800 Good day. 467 00:16:11,040 --> 00:16:13,239 Bye-ze-bye. 468 00:16:13,240 --> 00:16:13,280 Bye-ze-bye. 469 00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:15,640 (TENSE MUSIC) 470 00:16:17,280 --> 00:16:18,880 (SIGHS) 471 00:16:18,920 --> 00:16:21,239 Deacon's... disappeared. 472 00:16:21,240 --> 00:16:22,240 Deacon's... disappeared. 473 00:16:27,240 --> 00:16:29,160 (LAUGHING) You do. You do! 474 00:16:29,200 --> 00:16:29,240 You run like a teenage girl. I don't, no, no. 475 00:16:29,241 --> 00:16:31,280 You run like a teenage girl. I don't, no, no. 476 00:16:31,320 --> 00:16:33,120 My running style is perfectly normal, OK? 477 00:16:33,160 --> 00:16:34,920 For if you're being chased around a castle. 478 00:16:34,960 --> 00:16:36,720 I'm absolutely- Maybe it was the scream... 479 00:16:36,760 --> 00:16:37,240 (SCREAMS WEAKLY) (PHONE RINGS) 480 00:16:37,241 --> 00:16:38,600 (SCREAMS WEAKLY) (PHONE RINGS) 481 00:16:38,640 --> 00:16:41,000 Oh, hold on. Oh, is that Alfie again? 482 00:16:41,840 --> 00:16:44,080 It's Kethan. Hello? 483 00:16:44,120 --> 00:16:45,239 Well, you really put the curry amongst the pigeons down there, innit? 484 00:16:45,240 --> 00:16:47,856 Well, you really put the curry amongst the pigeons down there, innit? 485 00:16:47,880 --> 00:16:50,800 This isn't my fault. OK? You could've warned me about that psycho child. 486 00:16:50,840 --> 00:16:52,960 Whole of Jersey basically thinks I'm a sex offender. 487 00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:53,240 Casey? Sh-She's a sweetheart. 488 00:16:53,241 --> 00:16:54,880 Casey? Sh-She's a sweetheart. 489 00:16:54,920 --> 00:16:57,080 Luckily for you, Uncle Dave is an old friend 490 00:16:57,120 --> 00:16:59,896 and I managed to clear the air. So he don't want to kill you now, innit. 491 00:16:59,920 --> 00:17:01,239 Well thank God for that. 492 00:17:01,240 --> 00:17:01,320 Well thank God for that. 493 00:17:01,360 --> 00:17:04,000 There is another issue. (SIGHS) What? 494 00:17:04,040 --> 00:17:06,720 I told you get the 2 o'clock ferry. What time is it now? 495 00:17:06,760 --> 00:17:08,360 Well, I don't know, sort of 4 o'clock? 496 00:17:08,400 --> 00:17:09,240 Shame you missed the early one because that was the ferry where I paid off security. 497 00:17:09,241 --> 00:17:11,816 Shame you missed the early one because that was the ferry where I paid off security. 498 00:17:11,840 --> 00:17:14,120 What?! I need that bag, Deacon. 499 00:17:14,160 --> 00:17:16,840 And they normally do bag checks at Portsmouth. 500 00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:17,240 So, you'd better think of something. 501 00:17:17,241 --> 00:17:18,720 So, you'd better think of something. 502 00:17:18,760 --> 00:17:20,720 OK. So, what am I supposed to do? Hello? 503 00:17:25,480 --> 00:17:27,240 Don't wanna know. 504 00:17:27,280 --> 00:17:29,880 (TENSE MUSIC) 505 00:17:38,040 --> 00:17:39,960 (HORN HONKS) 506 00:17:45,280 --> 00:17:47,000 Bag, sir. 507 00:17:47,960 --> 00:17:49,239 That's fine. 508 00:17:49,240 --> 00:17:49,480 That's fine. 509 00:17:49,520 --> 00:17:52,280 Oh my God, they're checking bags. (SIGHS) Pass me the bag. 510 00:17:52,320 --> 00:17:54,240 Why? I wanna see what's in it. 511 00:17:54,280 --> 00:17:56,720 Kethan told us not to look in the bag under any circumstances. 512 00:17:56,760 --> 00:17:57,240 Wake up, Deacon. This is not Pulp Fiction. 513 00:17:57,241 --> 00:17:58,456 Wake up, Deacon. This is not Pulp Fiction. 514 00:17:58,480 --> 00:18:01,160 We can't let Kethan constantly dictate the terms. I've had enough. 515 00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:03,481 If we get caught, we need to know what we're dealing with. 516 00:18:03,520 --> 00:18:05,239 Pass me the bag. Fine. 517 00:18:05,240 --> 00:18:05,360 Pass me the bag. Fine. 518 00:18:05,400 --> 00:18:07,760 (TENSE MUSIC) 519 00:18:12,840 --> 00:18:13,240 (GASPS) 520 00:18:13,240 --> 00:18:14,000 (GASPS) 521 00:18:14,040 --> 00:18:15,720 (WHISPERS) Oh God! 522 00:18:15,760 --> 00:18:17,960 Could be... legit? (SIGHS) 523 00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:19,600 Fine. 524 00:18:20,720 --> 00:18:21,240 Now we know what's in the bag, what is the plan? 525 00:18:21,241 --> 00:18:22,936 Now we know what's in the bag, what is the plan? 526 00:18:22,960 --> 00:18:24,920 I have no idea. Oh, brilliant. 527 00:18:24,960 --> 00:18:27,720 'Cause now I'm shitting myself more than before we looked in the bag. 528 00:18:27,760 --> 00:18:29,000 Can I look in the bag please? 529 00:18:29,040 --> 00:18:29,240 Follow my lead. 530 00:18:29,241 --> 00:18:30,840 Follow my lead. 531 00:18:30,880 --> 00:18:33,800 (SHOUTS) You total piece of fucking shit! 532 00:18:33,840 --> 00:18:36,640 Um... Do you have any idea how it feels 533 00:18:36,680 --> 00:18:37,240 to be injecting your body with progesterone day after day? 534 00:18:37,241 --> 00:18:39,840 To be injecting your body with progesterone day after day? 535 00:18:39,880 --> 00:18:41,216 And all I needed was a little rest 536 00:18:41,240 --> 00:18:43,920 and instead, you take me on a day trip to old Jersey 537 00:18:43,960 --> 00:18:45,239 with eight hours of ferry rides, when you KNOW I hate boats! 538 00:18:45,240 --> 00:18:47,760 With eight hours of ferry rides, when you KNOW I hate boats! 539 00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:50,280 (STAMMERS) Well... er... 540 00:18:51,200 --> 00:18:53,239 Oh yeah, well, you know what? I- I don't like living with Esme. 541 00:18:53,240 --> 00:18:54,936 Oh yeah, well, you know what? I- I don't like living with Esme. 542 00:18:54,960 --> 00:18:57,800 Well, that... is unrelated to the argument we're having right now. 543 00:18:57,840 --> 00:19:00,440 But that just goes to show what a total piece of trash you are! 544 00:19:00,480 --> 00:19:01,240 Passports. Oh, sure. Take my passport. (CRIES) 545 00:19:01,241 --> 00:19:03,041 Passports. Oh, sure. Take my passport. (CRIES) 546 00:19:03,080 --> 00:19:06,080 You know, all I wanted from this trip was some peace and quiet. 547 00:19:06,120 --> 00:19:07,920 Whilst being tanked up on hormones, 548 00:19:07,960 --> 00:19:09,239 waiting to be inseminated like a battery chicken. 549 00:19:09,240 --> 00:19:10,816 Waiting to be inseminated like a battery chicken. 550 00:19:10,840 --> 00:19:12,976 Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. Can I see your bag, please? 551 00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:16,280 Oh, you know what? I'm sorry that whatever I do isn't good enough for you, Allison. 552 00:19:16,320 --> 00:19:17,240 You're always like, (MIMICS) "Oh, for fuck's sake, Deacon. 553 00:19:17,241 --> 00:19:18,736 You're always like, (MIMICS) "Oh, for fuck's sake, Deacon. 554 00:19:18,760 --> 00:19:20,040 You fucked it up again, Deacon, 555 00:19:20,080 --> 00:19:21,920 despite the fact I'm a fuckin' asshole!" 556 00:19:21,960 --> 00:19:24,200 I am not an asshole! You do fuck things up! 557 00:19:24,240 --> 00:19:25,240 You're like, (MIMICS) "Oh sorry, babe. I've done it again. 558 00:19:25,241 --> 00:19:26,616 You're like, (MIMICS) "Oh sorry, babe. I've done it again. 559 00:19:26,640 --> 00:19:28,680 Woop, there I go another mistake. 560 00:19:28,720 --> 00:19:31,280 Please forgive me, please Allison, babe." 561 00:19:31,320 --> 00:19:33,239 (SHOUTS) I cannot believe you did the fucking eye! 562 00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:34,376 (SHOUTS) I cannot believe you did the fucking eye! 563 00:19:34,400 --> 00:19:35,800 Fuck you! 564 00:19:35,840 --> 00:19:37,400 Fuck you! Oh, fuck you twice. 565 00:19:37,440 --> 00:19:39,160 Can you guys just take your stuff and go? 566 00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:41,200 Fuck you. Such an asshole. Fuck you. Fuck you! 567 00:19:41,240 --> 00:19:43,000 Get out of here. Oh, this is a great trip. 568 00:19:43,040 --> 00:19:45,880 Fuck you! Passport.Yep. 569 00:19:45,920 --> 00:19:47,400 (LAUGHS) 570 00:19:47,440 --> 00:19:48,920 That was incredible. 571 00:19:48,960 --> 00:19:49,240 You were incredible. You too, we nailed it. 572 00:19:49,241 --> 00:19:50,856 You were incredible. You too, we nailed it. 573 00:19:50,880 --> 00:19:52,840 Yes! Yes. BOTH: Boom! 574 00:19:52,880 --> 00:19:56,720 Erm... All that, erm... stuff you were saying in the argument, 575 00:19:56,760 --> 00:19:57,240 that was just to get us through, right? That's just for the bit? 576 00:19:57,241 --> 00:19:59,296 That was just to get us through, right? That's just for the bit? 577 00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:02,240 Yeah. Yeah. And you didn't mean it either? 578 00:20:02,280 --> 00:20:05,040 No, course not. I didn't mean any of that. Yeah. Yeah, no. 579 00:20:05,080 --> 00:20:05,240 (TYRES SCREECH) 580 00:20:05,241 --> 00:20:07,760 (TYRES SCREECH) 581 00:20:11,880 --> 00:20:13,239 We have the bag. Oh yeah. 582 00:20:13,240 --> 00:20:14,200 We have the bag. Oh yeah. 583 00:20:14,240 --> 00:20:16,840 And if you wouldn't mind passing on one of the biggest 584 00:20:16,880 --> 00:20:19,440 "Fuck you" s to your boss, Kethan, I'd be extremely grateful. 585 00:20:19,480 --> 00:20:21,000 She's joking. I'm not. 586 00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:21,240 She's joking. No. 587 00:20:21,241 --> 00:20:22,320 She's joking. No. 588 00:20:22,360 --> 00:20:24,840 Kethan says he wants your mother's number. 589 00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:26,240 (SIGHS) 590 00:20:26,280 --> 00:20:27,400 (PHONE CHIMES) 591 00:20:27,440 --> 00:20:29,239 (TYRES SCREECH) Tell Kethan I want HIS mother's number. 592 00:20:29,240 --> 00:20:29,720 (TYRES SCREECH) Tell Kethan I want HIS mother's number. 593 00:20:29,760 --> 00:20:31,320 Ooh! Voicemail from the clinic. 594 00:20:31,360 --> 00:20:33,480 Christ, I hope this has all been worth it. 595 00:20:33,520 --> 00:20:35,240 Go on? 596 00:20:36,080 --> 00:20:37,239 Oh my God, Deacon, they've fertilised five eggs. 597 00:20:37,240 --> 00:20:38,696 Oh my God, Deacon, they've fertilised five eggs. 598 00:20:38,720 --> 00:20:40,600 Five! 599 00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:42,600 Holy shit! That is amazing. 600 00:20:42,640 --> 00:20:43,880 It's incredible. (SIGHS) 601 00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:45,239 We've got five... baby... egg things. (PHONE CHIMES) 602 00:20:45,240 --> 00:20:47,096 We've got five... baby... egg things. (PHONE CHIMES) 603 00:20:47,120 --> 00:20:51,000 Yeah, I mean, I don't wanna get our hopes up, but maybe... 604 00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:53,120 Oh, if that is Kethan, you tell him 605 00:20:53,160 --> 00:20:53,238 to take that bag when he gets it, lube it up... 606 00:20:53,239 --> 00:20:55,079 to take that bag when he gets it, lube it up... 607 00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:01,120 (SCREAMS) Come on! 608 00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:01,240 ? THE HEAVY: No Time ? 609 00:21:01,241 --> 00:21:04,000 ? THE HEAVY: No Time ? 610 00:21:04,040 --> 00:21:07,880 AccessibleCustomerService@sky.uk 611 00:21:07,930 --> 00:21:12,480 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 48290

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