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1
00:00:28,278 --> 00:00:30,736
This is so beautiful.
2
00:00:31,824 --> 00:00:33,814
(Wyatt) You know it, Gary.
3
00:00:35,243 --> 00:00:36,655
Look at her.
4
00:00:44,253 --> 00:00:46,789
Do you know what I would like to do?
5
00:00:46,921 --> 00:00:48,832
Shower with them.
6
00:00:49,299 --> 00:00:53,418
Then, bang!
We hit the city, baby, dead on.
7
00:00:54,639 --> 00:00:58,427
For a little drinks,
a little nightlife, a little dancing.
8
00:00:58,558 --> 00:00:59,640
Dancing.
9
00:00:59,768 --> 00:01:02,851
We throw a huge party,
I mean, huge party.
10
00:01:02,979 --> 00:01:06,894
Everybody's invited, women everywhere.
11
00:01:07,025 --> 00:01:10,144
All these girls, they're all there.
12
00:01:10,278 --> 00:01:12,189
- Naked bodies everywhere.
- Gary.
13
00:01:12,323 --> 00:01:14,063
- They all know my name.
- Gary!
14
00:01:14,200 --> 00:01:18,319
- What?
- Nobody likes us. Nobody.
15
00:01:19,496 --> 00:01:21,989
Why are you messing with the fantasy?
16
00:01:22,500 --> 00:01:26,710
We know about the reality.
Don't ruin the fantasy, OK?
17
00:01:28,213 --> 00:01:32,753
And then, we're hip, man.
We're popular. We're revered.
18
00:01:32,884 --> 00:01:35,216
- (Wyatt) Man...
- (Gary) We're studs.
19
00:01:35,346 --> 00:01:36,710
(Sniggering)
20
00:01:37,430 --> 00:01:40,593
When the smoke clears, right,
21
00:01:42,645 --> 00:01:44,635
those two dames
22
00:01:44,771 --> 00:01:49,311
fall amazingly, completely and totally
in love with us, Wyatt.
23
00:01:50,777 --> 00:01:52,234
Check it out.
24
00:01:54,865 --> 00:01:56,855
(Ian) Yo! Check us out!
25
00:01:58,284 --> 00:02:00,275
(Heart beat pounding)
26
00:02:15,885 --> 00:02:18,468
Look, we're sorry about...
27
00:02:18,597 --> 00:02:20,587
(♪ OINGO BOINGO: "Weird Science")
28
00:02:21,891 --> 00:02:23,552
♪ She's alive
29
00:02:26,438 --> 00:02:28,850
- ♪ She's alive!
- ♪ Weird science
30
00:02:34,572 --> 00:02:35,937
♪ Weird!
31
00:02:42,329 --> 00:02:44,490
♪ Weird science
32
00:02:44,622 --> 00:02:46,659
♪ Plastic tubes and pots and pans
33
00:02:46,792 --> 00:02:49,123
♪ Bits and pieces and magic
From my hand
34
00:02:49,252 --> 00:02:52,211
♪ We're making weird science
35
00:02:52,338 --> 00:02:55,296
♪ Things I've never seen before
Behind bolted doors
36
00:02:55,425 --> 00:02:57,336
♪ Talent and imagination
37
00:02:57,469 --> 00:02:59,176
♪ My creation
38
00:02:59,305 --> 00:03:00,841
♪ Is it real?
39
00:03:00,973 --> 00:03:02,805
♪ It's my creation
40
00:03:02,932 --> 00:03:04,674
♪ I do not know
41
00:03:04,769 --> 00:03:08,228
♪ No hesitation,
No heart of gold
42
00:03:08,354 --> 00:03:10,221
♪ Just flesh and blood
43
00:03:10,356 --> 00:03:12,723
♪ I do not know,
I do not know
44
00:03:12,860 --> 00:03:14,600
♪ From my heart and from my hand
45
00:03:14,736 --> 00:03:18,320
♪ Why don't people understand
My intentions?
46
00:03:19,449 --> 00:03:22,487
♪ Ooh, weird science
47
00:03:22,620 --> 00:03:25,533
♪ Ooh! Ooh!
48
00:03:28,250 --> 00:03:29,865
♪ Weird science
49
00:03:30,877 --> 00:03:33,961
- ♪ Weird science
- ♪ Bits and pieces and bits and pieces
50
00:03:34,088 --> 00:03:36,626
- ♪ And bits and pieces
- ♪ Science... ♪
51
00:03:40,471 --> 00:03:42,302
('Bells ringing')
52
00:03:42,430 --> 00:03:45,173
'Down. Down, you fool.'
53
00:03:48,353 --> 00:03:50,765
You know, this isn't very scary, Gary.
54
00:03:51,941 --> 00:03:55,024
"I Spit On Your Grave" is scary.
This is, um...
55
00:03:55,652 --> 00:03:57,985
It's very mild.
It's timid, you know.
56
00:03:58,112 --> 00:04:01,104
The old stuff is more funny than scary.
57
00:04:01,241 --> 00:04:04,735
I believe the word is "camp".
It's campy.
58
00:04:05,704 --> 00:04:08,240
'The moon's rising.
We've no time to lose.'
59
00:04:08,373 --> 00:04:10,956
You ever see "Dawn of the Dead"?
"Dawn of the Dead" scared me.
60
00:04:11,085 --> 00:04:14,919
It really scared me.
I slept with my parents for a week, OK?
61
00:04:15,046 --> 00:04:16,629
I had to call my grandmother
in the night
62
00:04:16,757 --> 00:04:18,838
to discuss my childhood with her
for three hours.
63
00:04:18,968 --> 00:04:20,800
I was really petrified.
64
00:04:25,098 --> 00:04:28,466
'He's just resting,
waiting for a new life to come.'
65
00:04:28,601 --> 00:04:32,220
That would've been so much cooler
if Dr. Frankenstein had made a girl.
66
00:04:36,485 --> 00:04:40,319
Don't burn the butter, alright?
Ticks me off.
67
00:04:47,370 --> 00:04:51,659
I mean... I personally would've
made a girl, you know.
68
00:04:51,792 --> 00:04:54,204
They did make a girl,
"The Bride of Frankenstein".
69
00:04:54,336 --> 00:04:57,249
- I think it was released in '35.
- It was '34, alright?
70
00:04:58,465 --> 00:05:01,048
She was a scag, Wyatt,
she had, like, electric hair.
71
00:05:01,175 --> 00:05:03,963
If they made her beautiful,
she wouldn't go out with the monster.
72
00:05:04,596 --> 00:05:06,338
That's a good point.
73
00:05:21,196 --> 00:05:24,187
(TV) '...his insane ambition
to create life.'
74
00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:27,533
- Where'd your parents go, anyway?
- Cincinnati.
75
00:05:27,745 --> 00:05:30,533
They're meeting the guy
that my sister wants to marry.
76
00:05:31,624 --> 00:05:34,742
Chloe?
Who the hell would marry Chloe?
77
00:05:34,877 --> 00:05:36,867
He's studying to be a vet.
78
00:05:38,379 --> 00:05:41,668
Try not to make a mess in there, Gary.
The maid doesn't come till Monday.
79
00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:43,336
I don't understand something, Wyatt.
80
00:05:43,468 --> 00:05:46,336
How come your parents trust you?
They never let you do shit before.
81
00:05:46,471 --> 00:05:49,509
Chet's coming home from college
for the weekend. They trust him.
82
00:05:49,641 --> 00:05:51,257
He's in charge.
83
00:05:51,393 --> 00:05:53,884
Chet? Oh, shit!
84
00:05:54,646 --> 00:05:56,557
I can't believe this, Wyatt.
85
00:05:56,689 --> 00:05:59,899
I really wish that you told me this
before I agreed to sleep over.
86
00:06:00,026 --> 00:06:03,235
You know how I feel about Chet.
How do you put up with that guy?
87
00:06:03,363 --> 00:06:05,571
If I don't,
he beats the shit out of me.
88
00:06:05,699 --> 00:06:07,564
It's a habit he picked up
in military school.
89
00:06:07,701 --> 00:06:09,237
(Gary) How do you put up
with that putz?
90
00:06:09,370 --> 00:06:11,360
(Wyatt) What can I say?
He's very protective of me.
91
00:06:12,038 --> 00:06:13,654
Nice relationship.
92
00:06:13,790 --> 00:06:17,125
(TV) '...there you have his mad dream.
93
00:06:18,879 --> 00:06:22,292
'Look! There's nothing to fear.
94
00:06:22,423 --> 00:06:28,636
'Look... no blood, no decay,
just a few stitches.
95
00:06:28,764 --> 00:06:31,175
'Go on. Fix the electrodes.
96
00:06:31,307 --> 00:06:34,675
'You'll have plenty to be afraid of
before the night's over.
97
00:06:34,812 --> 00:06:36,802
'The storm will be magnificent.
98
00:06:36,939 --> 00:06:39,430
'All the electrical secrets of heaven.
99
00:06:40,692 --> 00:06:43,776
'And this time we're ready.
Hey, Fritz?
100
00:06:43,903 --> 00:06:46,612
'Let's have one final test.
Throw the switches.'
101
00:06:46,740 --> 00:06:48,901
('Thunder rumbles')
102
00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:54,653
'Here in this machine,
I have discovered the great ray
103
00:06:54,790 --> 00:06:57,747
'that first brought life into the world.
104
00:06:57,875 --> 00:07:00,242
'And, look, here's the final touch.
105
00:07:03,132 --> 00:07:06,625
'The brain you stole, Fritz.
Think of it.
106
00:07:06,759 --> 00:07:09,923
'The brain of a dead man
waiting to live again
107
00:07:10,055 --> 00:07:13,468
'in a body I made
with my own hands...'
108
00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:16,216
- You know, that's not a bad idea.
- What?
109
00:07:16,353 --> 00:07:18,810
(TV) 'In 15 minutes,
the storm should be at its height...'
110
00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:20,771
Making a girl.
111
00:07:24,194 --> 00:07:26,560
Actually making a girl.
112
00:07:28,031 --> 00:07:29,773
Just like Frankenstein.
113
00:07:30,617 --> 00:07:32,324
Except cuter.
114
00:07:38,082 --> 00:07:40,620
- You're serious.
- Yes.
115
00:07:43,797 --> 00:07:45,879
Look me in the eyes.
116
00:07:46,007 --> 00:07:47,793
Do I look serious?
117
00:07:47,925 --> 00:07:50,838
- (Man #2) 'You're crazy!'
- 'Crazy, am I?
118
00:07:50,971 --> 00:07:53,928
'We'll see whether I'm crazy or not.'
119
00:07:54,682 --> 00:07:57,971
Gary Wallace, that's absolutely gross.
That's sick.
120
00:07:58,103 --> 00:08:00,264
I'm not digging up dead girls. It's...
121
00:08:03,399 --> 00:08:07,189
No, I'm not talking about digging up
a dead girl, Wyatt.
122
00:08:07,321 --> 00:08:09,733
I'm talking about your system, idiot.
Your computer.
123
00:08:11,158 --> 00:08:13,524
OK, you know how you're always talking
how you can simulate all that stuff
124
00:08:13,660 --> 00:08:16,151
on your computer, you know?
125
00:08:16,288 --> 00:08:18,779
What's the difference?
Why can't we simulate a girl?
126
00:08:18,915 --> 00:08:22,408
I don't know.
I guess I could, but why?
127
00:08:22,543 --> 00:08:26,002
It's two-dimensional on the screen.
It's not flesh and blood, Gary.
128
00:08:26,130 --> 00:08:30,170
I know that, but we can use it, Wyatt.
We can ask it questions.
129
00:08:30,302 --> 00:08:32,918
We can put it in real-life sexual situations
and see how it reacts.
130
00:08:33,054 --> 00:08:35,386
Like real sick, demented shit.
You'd love it.
131
00:08:35,515 --> 00:08:39,259
Well, what about your girl in, um...
Canada?
132
00:08:40,437 --> 00:08:43,475
She lives in Canada. This girl has
no morals. I don't like that in a girl.
133
00:08:43,606 --> 00:08:45,894
It's rough having those kind
of relationships. You'll see.
134
00:08:46,025 --> 00:08:48,017
(Clears throat) Anyway, get to work.
135
00:08:53,616 --> 00:08:54,947
Very nice.
136
00:08:59,664 --> 00:09:03,124
I'm telling you, Wyatt. If there's
one thing I know, it's female stats.
137
00:09:03,251 --> 00:09:06,539
Anything bigger than a handful,
you're risking a sprained tongue.
138
00:09:06,672 --> 00:09:08,413
You know, and...
139
00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:09,913
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
140
00:09:12,135 --> 00:09:15,254
- Perfect.
- OK. Now what?
141
00:09:16,764 --> 00:09:19,052
Should we give her a brain?
142
00:09:19,183 --> 00:09:22,346
- Yeah. We can play chess with her.
- Chess?
143
00:09:22,479 --> 00:09:24,890
Just give her a brain, OK?
144
00:09:33,740 --> 00:09:37,278
OK, that's about all we can do
with my stuff.
145
00:09:37,411 --> 00:09:40,620
I can't believe this shit.
I can't believe this.
146
00:09:40,746 --> 00:09:42,863
Did you get a free toaster
with this, too?
147
00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:45,162
Gary, it's smarter than you, OK?
148
00:09:45,293 --> 00:09:48,286
- The problem is, it's a lame idea, OK?
- It's not a lame idea.
149
00:09:48,422 --> 00:09:51,210
The problem is your computer's a wimp
and we need a lot more power than this.
150
00:09:51,341 --> 00:09:52,876
What do you suggest?
151
00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:58,678
(Computer) 'We have code penetration,
we have program entry.
152
00:09:58,807 --> 00:10:01,548
'I repeat, we have code penetration,
we have program entry.
153
00:10:10,610 --> 00:10:12,977
'Activate LAN trace.'
154
00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:28,078
('Screaming')
155
00:10:50,024 --> 00:10:51,355
We're in.
156
00:10:51,485 --> 00:10:53,317
We're in trouble, Gary.
157
00:10:53,445 --> 00:10:55,277
This is highly illegal.
158
00:10:55,404 --> 00:10:58,317
Well, you need more input.
We got to fill this thing up with data.
159
00:10:58,450 --> 00:11:01,067
We gotta make her
as real as possible, Wyatt.
160
00:11:01,202 --> 00:11:04,195
I want her to live,
I want her to breathe.
161
00:11:04,331 --> 00:11:06,493
I want her to aerobicize.
162
00:11:41,659 --> 00:11:44,447
'It's live! All Dave, all night!
163
00:11:44,913 --> 00:11:51,000
'We know what you need.
Only right here on Dave TV!'
164
00:11:52,004 --> 00:11:54,745
Look at this. It's moving, it's working.
It's doing itself.
165
00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:56,542
It's working by itself.
166
00:12:08,644 --> 00:12:10,760
(♪ Chanting)
167
00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:19,235
- Gary?
- (Continues chanting)
168
00:12:20,282 --> 00:12:23,399
By the way, why are we
wearing bras on our heads?
169
00:12:24,161 --> 00:12:25,491
Ceremonial.
170
00:12:26,455 --> 00:12:28,115
(Thunderclaps)
171
00:12:34,296 --> 00:12:37,288
- (Wyatt) You ready?
- Yeah. Let's go.
172
00:12:40,594 --> 00:12:43,302
- Turn it off!
- It is off!
173
00:12:46,807 --> 00:12:48,219
(Alarm rings)
174
00:12:48,351 --> 00:12:50,809
(Wyatt) Hang up the phone!
175
00:13:00,197 --> 00:13:02,609
- Wyatt, what's going on?
- I don't know!
176
00:13:02,740 --> 00:13:04,981
- Well, unplug it!
- OK!
177
00:13:09,288 --> 00:13:10,745
Oh, shit!
178
00:13:23,386 --> 00:13:25,754
No! It was a birthday present!
179
00:13:30,059 --> 00:13:31,596
Oh, shit!
180
00:13:33,562 --> 00:13:35,052
- Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God!
181
00:13:35,190 --> 00:13:38,227
Oh, shit! We got to get this thing
out of your house!
182
00:13:38,360 --> 00:13:40,270
You get it out! It was your idea!
183
00:13:40,361 --> 00:13:42,318
This is all your fault, you son of a bitch!
184
00:13:42,447 --> 00:13:44,778
Hit the lights out!
You get it out!
185
00:13:44,865 --> 00:13:46,447
I'll get it out!
186
00:13:58,422 --> 00:14:01,210
(Door creaking)
187
00:14:08,974 --> 00:14:11,260
- (Gary) Whoa!
- Aargh!
188
00:14:12,601 --> 00:14:14,467
(Wyatt) Ah, shit!
189
00:14:45,259 --> 00:14:46,671
One, two, three.
190
00:14:50,056 --> 00:14:52,764
'She's alive. Alive!'
191
00:14:59,356 --> 00:15:04,442
So... what would you little maniacs
like to do first?
192
00:15:09,493 --> 00:15:13,201
(Woman) You guys created me.
I didn't come from anywhere.
193
00:15:13,330 --> 00:15:17,414
Before you started messing around
with your computer, I didn't even exist.
194
00:15:20,419 --> 00:15:25,129
By the way... you did an excellent job.
Thank you.
195
00:15:26,217 --> 00:15:27,504
(Mouths words)
196
00:15:29,721 --> 00:15:31,131
Hello?
197
00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:36,591
Showering's real fun, isn't it?
198
00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:45,650
If we're going to have
any kind of fun together,
199
00:15:47,029 --> 00:15:49,111
you guys had better loosen up.
200
00:15:55,705 --> 00:15:58,572
What are we going to do with her?
201
00:15:58,707 --> 00:16:02,371
Look... we'll just go
with the situation, OK?
202
00:16:02,504 --> 00:16:04,336
I'm sure by Sunday,
you'll think of something.
203
00:16:04,464 --> 00:16:06,956
You're a very bright guy.
I have a lot of faith in you, OK?
204
00:16:07,091 --> 00:16:09,958
- Alright?
- I'm just being practical.
205
00:16:10,095 --> 00:16:12,461
Well, I know you are, OK?
And I appreciate it.
206
00:16:12,596 --> 00:16:13,836
Let's go.
207
00:16:14,765 --> 00:16:16,631
What are we going to do
about this mess?
208
00:16:16,768 --> 00:16:19,556
Wyatt, you'll have plenty of time
to clean up tomorrow, OK?
209
00:16:19,687 --> 00:16:23,272
OK, but don't get any B.O. on Chet's suit,
or he'll kill me.
210
00:16:26,528 --> 00:16:28,269
- Where are we going, anyway?
- I dunno.
211
00:16:28,404 --> 00:16:31,942
She said we're going to go downtown...
Oh, my God! Whose stuff is this?
212
00:16:32,075 --> 00:16:34,032
- Is that your suit? Wait, is this yours?
- Oh, shit.
213
00:16:34,159 --> 00:16:37,494
Holy shit!
Wyatt, what's going on here?
214
00:16:37,621 --> 00:16:39,488
- Gary, I don't know!
- I don't know what's going on here!
215
00:16:39,624 --> 00:16:40,989
You look good, though, alright?
216
00:16:41,125 --> 00:16:42,456
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
217
00:16:49,091 --> 00:16:52,676
- So, did you steal this car?
- No, I didn't steal the car.
218
00:16:52,803 --> 00:16:55,261
How'd you get it?
219
00:16:55,389 --> 00:16:57,756
I can get anything I want.
220
00:16:57,892 --> 00:17:01,054
- And right now, I want to party.
- Party?
221
00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:04,724
Yeah, and you better think up
a name for me, too.
222
00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:06,690
What name do you want?
223
00:17:06,817 --> 00:17:09,901
You guys created me,
you think of a name for me.
224
00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:11,519
How about Lisa?
225
00:17:11,655 --> 00:17:13,067
Why Lisa?
226
00:17:14,576 --> 00:17:16,192
Why not?
227
00:17:16,327 --> 00:17:20,913
- He used to like a girl named Lisa.
- Oh, yeah? Old girlfriend?
228
00:17:21,040 --> 00:17:22,826
She kicked him in the nuts.
229
00:17:24,336 --> 00:17:26,247
Will you shut up?
230
00:17:26,378 --> 00:17:29,461
Look, Gary, it wasn't your fault.
All you said was hello to her.
231
00:17:29,590 --> 00:17:31,627
Yeah, look, Wyatt, shut up!
232
00:17:32,760 --> 00:17:36,720
Hey, guys, I like Lisa.
That'll do just fine.
233
00:17:39,726 --> 00:17:41,887
OK, you guys ready to rock?
234
00:17:42,019 --> 00:17:43,681
- Ready.
- Ready.
235
00:17:44,897 --> 00:17:46,605
(Tires screech)
236
00:17:46,732 --> 00:17:48,222
(Boys yelping)
237
00:17:49,443 --> 00:17:51,309
(♪ Blues music playing)
238
00:18:04,209 --> 00:18:05,619
(♪ Music stops)
239
00:18:08,546 --> 00:18:10,708
- (High-pitched voice) Lisa?
- Yeah?
240
00:18:12,049 --> 00:18:16,544
- I don't think we belong here.
- Don't be silly. It's a public place.
241
00:18:16,680 --> 00:18:18,090
(♪ Music restarts)
242
00:18:20,392 --> 00:18:24,385
Look, I'm sure we'd both love to stay,
but we're not 21, so I think...
243
00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:27,604
You're 21. You're 21.
244
00:18:31,027 --> 00:18:34,361
Well, maybe you'd feel better
if you just got out there and mingled.
245
00:18:34,489 --> 00:18:36,605
We don't mingle, OK?
246
00:18:37,491 --> 00:18:40,483
Well, maybe you'd be comfortable
if I invited all these people
247
00:18:40,619 --> 00:18:44,989
back to your house
and we could all mingle there.
248
00:18:45,125 --> 00:18:46,957
- We'll mingle.
- We'll mingle.
249
00:18:51,673 --> 00:18:53,128
Hi, dudes.
250
00:18:54,550 --> 00:18:56,007
(All mutter)
251
00:19:04,935 --> 00:19:06,676
(Wyatt) Well, goddamn!
252
00:19:09,148 --> 00:19:11,185
Listening to this blues music
reminds me
253
00:19:11,317 --> 00:19:14,275
of my own trials and tribulations
as a young guy and, uh...
254
00:19:14,403 --> 00:19:18,647
You know, my folks, they really,
really dump on me. They really do.
255
00:19:20,117 --> 00:19:22,075
So, you guys get along
with your parents?
256
00:19:25,457 --> 00:19:28,744
I guess you guys moved out
by now though, huh?
257
00:19:31,712 --> 00:19:34,250
- Uh, what's this, sir?
- Drink it.
258
00:19:37,134 --> 00:19:38,967
(Clears throat) Uh...
259
00:19:39,095 --> 00:19:42,587
That's a very sweet thought of both
you gentlemen, but I really don't...
260
00:19:45,643 --> 00:19:47,054
Until now.
261
00:19:51,982 --> 00:19:53,894
See you guys
in the emergency room, huh?
262
00:19:54,027 --> 00:19:57,394
(Man) Hello, pretty lady.
Tell me something.
263
00:19:57,529 --> 00:20:01,239
What's a beautiful broad like you
doing with a malaka like this, huh?
264
00:20:01,366 --> 00:20:04,529
It's purely sexual.
265
00:20:04,662 --> 00:20:06,117
No shit.
266
00:20:06,830 --> 00:20:08,663
She's into malakas, Dino.
267
00:20:09,917 --> 00:20:11,328
(All laugh)
268
00:20:12,670 --> 00:20:15,502
She's into malakas!
Do you believe that?
269
00:20:21,762 --> 00:20:23,470
You can say that again!
270
00:20:31,396 --> 00:20:32,807
(♪ Blues music playing)
271
00:20:40,949 --> 00:20:45,317
Fats, man...
let me tell you my story, man.
272
00:20:45,994 --> 00:20:50,990
Last year, I was insane
for this crazy little 8th-grade bitch.
273
00:20:51,125 --> 00:20:52,615
- OK?
- Crazy insane?
274
00:20:52,751 --> 00:20:54,334
- Insane?
- Crazy?
275
00:20:54,461 --> 00:20:56,702
I was nuts for the woman, man.
276
00:20:56,839 --> 00:20:59,923
Now you gotta believe me,
I'm telling the truth here.
277
00:21:00,050 --> 00:21:04,339
I'm speaking to you.
I mean, I was nuts for the girl.
278
00:21:04,471 --> 00:21:07,055
And what did it to me
was these big titties she had.
279
00:21:07,182 --> 00:21:09,423
For a 13-year-old girl, man!
280
00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:12,394
She wouldn't have had to worry about
no titties for the rest of her life, boy.
281
00:21:12,521 --> 00:21:15,230
You know, she was set
and she was looking good.
282
00:21:15,357 --> 00:21:16,847
That's the truth, baby.
283
00:21:16,984 --> 00:21:19,101
I called her every night
for, like, a month.
284
00:21:19,237 --> 00:21:21,147
I mean, I'm talking devotion, man.
285
00:21:21,280 --> 00:21:23,271
Every damn night?
286
00:21:23,407 --> 00:21:25,148
Every night, Mitch.
I ain't playing with you.
287
00:21:25,285 --> 00:21:27,116
(Man) On the telephone?
288
00:21:28,788 --> 00:21:31,246
What's this boy talking about,
on the telephone, man?
289
00:21:31,374 --> 00:21:33,330
Explain it to him.
290
00:21:33,459 --> 00:21:35,325
Goddamn.
We know there's a telephone, boy!
291
00:21:35,461 --> 00:21:38,670
- What the hell he think I'm doing?
- But he hung up on her.
292
00:21:38,798 --> 00:21:41,756
Oh, you didn't hang up on her?
The chick with those big, big titties?
293
00:21:41,884 --> 00:21:45,627
I hung up on the bitch.
Now here's the capper.
294
00:21:45,762 --> 00:21:48,130
- You know what the bitch did to me?
- Lay it on me.
295
00:21:48,266 --> 00:21:50,677
Check this shit out.
Listen to what she did to me. She...
296
00:21:50,809 --> 00:21:54,598
She kneed you in the nuts and
called him faggot in front of everybody.
297
00:21:54,730 --> 00:21:56,813
- She did what?
- Bitch kneed your nuts?
298
00:21:56,941 --> 00:21:58,146
Bitch kneed my nuts!
299
00:21:58,276 --> 00:22:00,563
Bitch. I'm not playing with you.
I ain't teasing, man.
300
00:22:00,694 --> 00:22:03,528
- In the family jewels?
- In the family jewels, man.
301
00:22:03,655 --> 00:22:06,443
- Worst pain there is.
- Broke my heart in two.
302
00:22:06,576 --> 00:22:10,615
- She broke more than your heart.
- You're right there, baby.
303
00:22:10,747 --> 00:22:12,613
You can forget that other one.
304
00:22:12,749 --> 00:22:14,990
You got this fine jewel
sitting right over here by you.
305
00:22:15,125 --> 00:22:17,913
- (All) Yeah.
- Ain't that the truth, baby?
306
00:22:18,046 --> 00:22:21,413
- That's the plain truth...
- Uh-oh, there he goes!
307
00:22:24,801 --> 00:22:28,135
- Party's over.
- (Gary) Party's over, said the girl.
308
00:22:28,263 --> 00:22:31,801
I'm gonna get out of here. I got money
for you right here. $50 for you.
309
00:22:36,314 --> 00:22:39,557
- I got $500 that boy won't make it.
- I bet he's gonna make it.
310
00:22:39,692 --> 00:22:44,481
♪ Ooh, baby,
Baby, you know I love you
311
00:22:49,117 --> 00:22:52,155
You know, I really shouldn't be driving.
312
00:22:52,288 --> 00:22:55,997
Hey, listen, I appreciate it. You know,
I really just don't feel like driving.
313
00:22:57,250 --> 00:23:00,288
OK, forget it. I'll drive.
Give me the keys!
314
00:23:00,421 --> 00:23:02,412
Give me the keys!
315
00:23:02,548 --> 00:23:04,630
Is he going to be all right?
316
00:23:04,759 --> 00:23:07,625
I don't know. I warned him
about that Blind Dog bourbon.
317
00:23:07,761 --> 00:23:10,880
Hey, he don't even have
his license, Lisa.
318
00:23:11,015 --> 00:23:13,757
He's not lying.
I don't even have a learner's permit.
319
00:23:13,893 --> 00:23:16,351
Hey, let's scout another party, man.
320
00:23:17,313 --> 00:23:19,724
What are you gonna tell Chet
about me?
321
00:23:19,856 --> 00:23:21,439
Nothing.
322
00:23:21,567 --> 00:23:23,182
Nothing?
323
00:23:23,318 --> 00:23:25,401
That's not very realistic, Wyatt.
324
00:23:25,529 --> 00:23:29,364
Look, I don't know. I'm just trying
to concentrate on the road.
325
00:23:29,491 --> 00:23:33,405
You better concentrate a little harder.
You're about to run a red light.
326
00:23:34,122 --> 00:23:35,452
Oh, shit!
327
00:23:35,580 --> 00:23:36,991
(Tires screeching)
328
00:23:44,382 --> 00:23:46,669
(Gary) I hate that boy!
I always hated that shit!
329
00:23:46,800 --> 00:23:50,044
I never listen to him!
I hate this car! I hate it!
330
00:23:50,179 --> 00:23:51,589
Are you OK?
331
00:23:53,473 --> 00:23:57,262
Well, my nuts are halfway up my ass,
but other than that, I'm perfect!
332
00:23:58,145 --> 00:24:00,762
You better think of what
you're going to do about Chet.
333
00:24:00,897 --> 00:24:03,184
He's one serious idiot.
334
00:24:03,317 --> 00:24:05,604
You're stewed, butt wad!
335
00:24:07,070 --> 00:24:08,435
Who, me?
336
00:24:08,573 --> 00:24:10,439
Know what time it is?
337
00:24:10,575 --> 00:24:12,816
Um... 2:00?
338
00:24:12,951 --> 00:24:15,159
Time to pay the fiddler.
339
00:24:21,626 --> 00:24:25,586
Um... I was kind of counting on you
to be human about this.
340
00:24:31,929 --> 00:24:34,135
Here's the bottom line, Wyatt.
341
00:24:35,223 --> 00:24:37,682
I'm telling Mom and Dad everything.
342
00:24:38,685 --> 00:24:41,769
I'm even considering
making up some shit.
343
00:24:43,523 --> 00:24:45,355
Alright, Chet, name your price.
344
00:24:47,236 --> 00:24:50,398
$175 and zero cents, cash.
345
00:24:50,530 --> 00:24:54,945
New bills, crisp and clean,
in my wallet by 7:00 a.m.
346
00:24:56,287 --> 00:24:57,573
Thank you.
347
00:24:57,704 --> 00:25:00,788
Hey, what are big brothers for?
348
00:25:02,167 --> 00:25:04,000
See you upstairs.
349
00:25:05,212 --> 00:25:07,500
- (Slurs) I don't need you.
- Shh!
350
00:25:08,590 --> 00:25:10,173
(Blows raspberry)
351
00:25:10,300 --> 00:25:11,665
(Sniggering)
352
00:25:13,887 --> 00:25:15,753
The boozehounds return.
353
00:25:16,807 --> 00:25:18,640
What a joke!
354
00:25:18,768 --> 00:25:20,384
Hi, girls.
355
00:25:30,278 --> 00:25:31,565
(Burps)
356
00:25:31,696 --> 00:25:33,813
(Chet) Feeling kind of queasy?
357
00:25:33,950 --> 00:25:40,037
How about...
a nice greasy pork sandwich
358
00:25:40,163 --> 00:25:42,780
served in a dirty ashtray?
359
00:25:50,883 --> 00:25:52,294
(Laughing)
360
00:25:53,594 --> 00:25:55,835
He pukes, you die.
361
00:25:56,972 --> 00:25:59,088
He's not laughing at you, Chet.
It's just...
362
00:25:59,224 --> 00:26:01,261
(Gary) Yes, I am.
363
00:26:01,394 --> 00:26:04,603
Did you tell Chet about...? Did he tell you
about the woman we made tonight?
364
00:26:04,730 --> 00:26:07,392
He's obviously had it.
He doesn't know what he's talking about.
365
00:26:07,525 --> 00:26:11,063
- No shit?
- No shit, Chet. No shit.
366
00:26:11,194 --> 00:26:14,688
You two donkey dicks
couldn't get laid in a morgue.
367
00:26:14,824 --> 00:26:16,940
You're right.
You are absolutely right.
368
00:26:17,076 --> 00:26:19,659
- You're absolutely right, Chet...
- Get him outta here.
369
00:26:19,787 --> 00:26:21,993
- What?
- Come on.
370
00:26:23,290 --> 00:26:24,701
(Retching)
371
00:26:29,881 --> 00:26:31,291
(Laughs)
372
00:26:33,843 --> 00:26:36,835
Cold-blooded shit he is.
He's an asshole.
373
00:26:36,971 --> 00:26:40,338
Look at his haircut. Anybody with a haircut
like that you know is an asshole...
374
00:26:59,117 --> 00:27:00,903
Psst! Lisa.
375
00:27:03,623 --> 00:27:05,614
Where are you?
376
00:27:07,542 --> 00:27:09,534
I'm right behind you.
377
00:27:13,173 --> 00:27:14,585
Surprise!
378
00:27:22,724 --> 00:27:24,557
I'm not going to hurt you,
you silly thing.
379
00:27:24,684 --> 00:27:27,426
I mean, your lips.
They feel like rigor mortis has set in.
380
00:27:27,563 --> 00:27:30,771
Why don't you try and relax a little bit?
I'm only kissing you.
381
00:27:32,526 --> 00:27:35,689
I wasn't expecting you to kiss me.
I was just...
382
00:27:35,820 --> 00:27:37,277
(Muttering)
383
00:27:48,416 --> 00:27:50,249
That was better.
384
00:27:52,255 --> 00:27:54,461
Want to try it again?
385
00:27:54,589 --> 00:27:58,628
If you don't mind.
I mean, yes, please, ma'am.
386
00:28:09,313 --> 00:28:10,723
(Yelps)
387
00:28:17,488 --> 00:28:21,823
- You sure you're only 15?
- I'll be 16 in June.
388
00:28:23,743 --> 00:28:25,359
You made me.
389
00:28:26,038 --> 00:28:27,653
You control me.
390
00:28:33,086 --> 00:28:36,421
What's on your mind?
What are you thinking about, huh?
391
00:28:36,548 --> 00:28:37,755
Um...
392
00:28:38,800 --> 00:28:40,758
Women's gymnastics.
393
00:28:42,262 --> 00:28:44,755
Well, I don't know.
I'll do my best.
394
00:28:46,142 --> 00:28:47,472
Good.
395
00:28:58,237 --> 00:29:02,821
(♪ MIKE OLDFIELD: "Tubular Bells")
396
00:29:20,343 --> 00:29:21,753
(Groans)
397
00:29:24,180 --> 00:29:29,016
Wyatt, Wyatt, Wyatt, where are you?
398
00:29:29,143 --> 00:29:32,226
- I'm right here, Gary.
- Wyatt, what happened?
399
00:29:32,355 --> 00:29:33,971
I don't know.
400
00:29:34,105 --> 00:29:36,063
I think it was a dream.
401
00:29:38,818 --> 00:29:39,980
What?
402
00:29:40,112 --> 00:29:42,148
Everything. Last night. Lisa.
403
00:29:42,280 --> 00:29:44,363
The whole thing,
it had to be a dream.
404
00:29:44,491 --> 00:29:47,951
It can't be a dream, Wyatt.
We were both in it.
405
00:29:48,078 --> 00:29:50,695
How can two people
have the same dream?
406
00:29:51,624 --> 00:29:53,911
There's no other explanation.
It had to be a dream.
407
00:29:54,042 --> 00:29:57,080
Wait, let's analyze this.
Alright, in your dream...
408
00:29:58,381 --> 00:30:00,712
did I get up in the middle of the night
and yak in your sink?
409
00:30:01,842 --> 00:30:05,175
Didn't throw up. No. Nothing.
You didn't see anything.
410
00:30:05,304 --> 00:30:07,340
Maybe it was a dream, you know.
411
00:30:08,223 --> 00:30:11,887
A very weird, bizarre, vivid...
412
00:30:13,436 --> 00:30:17,556
...erotic, wet, detailed dream.
413
00:30:19,192 --> 00:30:20,729
Maybe we have malaria.
414
00:30:21,319 --> 00:30:22,605
Shit.
415
00:30:30,371 --> 00:30:33,954
Gary! Wyatt! Breakfast!
416
00:30:38,253 --> 00:30:41,462
Look, I don't have the kind of bucks
it would take to pay Chet off about this.
417
00:30:41,589 --> 00:30:43,250
(Chet) Yo, Wyatt! Coffee!
418
00:30:43,384 --> 00:30:46,922
You can't live in fear of Chet
for the rest of your life.
419
00:30:47,054 --> 00:30:49,010
Why not? Just please...
420
00:30:51,433 --> 00:30:55,894
I don't know, Wyatt. I mean,
it's seriously affecting your sex life.
421
00:30:56,020 --> 00:30:59,888
Ten seconds into my gymnastics routine,
you passed out.
422
00:31:00,025 --> 00:31:01,480
You slept.
423
00:31:02,528 --> 00:31:04,064
I did my toes.
424
00:31:04,195 --> 00:31:06,903
By the way, you're very cute.
425
00:31:07,031 --> 00:31:09,740
We'll try it again
some other time, OK?
426
00:31:13,497 --> 00:31:16,660
- Good morning, turd brain.
- Hi, Chet.
427
00:31:21,797 --> 00:31:25,836
- You spit in this?
- Not that I'm aware of, no.
428
00:31:26,926 --> 00:31:29,042
Hey, that looks pretty good.
429
00:31:34,809 --> 00:31:37,426
Now make yourself one, dick weed.
430
00:31:44,278 --> 00:31:46,609
I like your panties.
431
00:31:46,739 --> 00:31:50,073
- (Burps)
- It's a joke, Chet. You know, it's all...
432
00:31:50,201 --> 00:31:54,160
That's not a joke!
That is a severe behavioral disorder.
433
00:31:54,288 --> 00:31:56,779
Those are women's underpants!
434
00:31:56,915 --> 00:31:59,624
The next thing you know,
you'll be wearing a bra on your head.
435
00:32:00,920 --> 00:32:04,163
The old man's gonna have a stroke
on this one for sure.
436
00:32:05,465 --> 00:32:07,502
Alright, Chet. How much?
437
00:32:07,634 --> 00:32:09,000
How much?
438
00:32:09,135 --> 00:32:12,548
Oh, this goes way beyond payment, pal.
439
00:32:12,681 --> 00:32:14,547
Come on, Chet. Please?
440
00:32:16,393 --> 00:32:17,804
Well...
441
00:32:20,439 --> 00:32:22,726
Your VCR should cover it.
442
00:32:22,857 --> 00:32:24,848
For openers.
443
00:32:24,984 --> 00:32:26,395
Thank you.
444
00:32:27,195 --> 00:32:30,188
For Christ's sakes,
will you cover yourself?
445
00:32:50,176 --> 00:32:53,795
You guys looking for something
for your mom?
446
00:32:55,848 --> 00:32:58,385
I really don't think so... Sue.
447
00:33:00,479 --> 00:33:03,688
You guys have, uh... girlfriends?
448
00:33:03,816 --> 00:33:06,729
You know, Sue,
one does really not refer
449
00:33:06,859 --> 00:33:09,647
to a 23-year-old woman as a girlfriend.
450
00:33:10,280 --> 00:33:12,567
- (Wyatt) A mistress, Gar.
- (Gary) Mistress.
451
00:33:12,700 --> 00:33:14,566
- Lover.
- Sexpot.
452
00:33:14,701 --> 00:33:16,909
She's a sexpot is what she is.
453
00:33:17,037 --> 00:33:21,998
You guys are the ones that got beat up
at the homecoming game, right?
454
00:33:22,125 --> 00:33:23,741
Hmm...
455
00:33:25,878 --> 00:33:30,964
Uh... Susan, do you think you could
wrap up a bottle of this scent for me?
456
00:33:31,093 --> 00:33:33,800
- I like this.
- (Wyatt) Um... two.
457
00:33:33,929 --> 00:33:36,386
And why don't you set yourself up
with one of them, too.
458
00:33:36,515 --> 00:33:39,758
Set yourself up.
That's three scents, please.
459
00:33:39,893 --> 00:33:43,102
- If you were a 15-year-old boy...
- Hmm...
460
00:33:43,896 --> 00:33:46,513
- ...would these turn you on?
- Hmm...?
461
00:33:47,567 --> 00:33:50,151
I think so, too. I'll take them.
462
00:33:56,951 --> 00:34:00,161
Uh... do you have a bra
to match that?
463
00:34:00,288 --> 00:34:03,247
Something in leather or rubber,
or barb wire?
464
00:34:03,375 --> 00:34:05,332
Give me a break.
465
00:34:08,047 --> 00:34:09,788
Check it out. Check it out.
466
00:34:09,922 --> 00:34:11,208
What?
467
00:34:15,971 --> 00:34:17,257
Five bucks?
468
00:34:17,389 --> 00:34:18,800
Finsky.
469
00:34:21,476 --> 00:34:23,309
Max, what are you gonna do?
470
00:34:27,650 --> 00:34:30,141
- You know what, Gar?
- Hmm?
471
00:34:30,277 --> 00:34:33,985
For the first time in my life,
I don't feel like a total dick.
472
00:34:34,114 --> 00:34:35,603
Yeah, me either.
473
00:34:38,327 --> 00:34:39,782
(All laughing)
474
00:34:47,670 --> 00:34:50,286
Sorry, boys.
Momentary loss of motor nerves.
475
00:34:50,422 --> 00:34:53,664
Getting tired of this? We're not.
But I'll tell you, there is a cure.
476
00:34:53,800 --> 00:34:56,634
Rumor has it,
there's a big white sale going on.
477
00:34:56,762 --> 00:34:58,923
- At Towel World!
- Towel World!
478
00:34:59,972 --> 00:35:02,179
- We're not impressed.
- No.
479
00:35:08,648 --> 00:35:10,936
Can I have some of that, please?
480
00:35:13,362 --> 00:35:15,353
You know I'm getting
really bored of their shit.
481
00:35:15,489 --> 00:35:18,277
- Well, do you wanna dump them?
- I don't know.
482
00:35:18,409 --> 00:35:21,992
We have been with them three months.
We've been to the parties, met the people.
483
00:35:22,121 --> 00:35:24,737
We won't go to any more parties
and we won't meet any more people.
484
00:35:24,873 --> 00:35:26,864
We'll go into a social coma.
485
00:35:27,918 --> 00:35:29,329
- Sorry.
- Sorry.
486
00:35:29,460 --> 00:35:30,871
We're sorry.
487
00:35:31,003 --> 00:35:34,041
- Wanna give them another chance?
- OK.
488
00:35:35,259 --> 00:35:37,000
- Will you forgive us?
- Please.
489
00:35:37,135 --> 00:35:39,001
Oh, you guys.
490
00:35:39,722 --> 00:35:42,134
What are we gonna do with you?
491
00:35:42,266 --> 00:35:43,677
(Cackling)
492
00:35:44,893 --> 00:35:46,304
(Barking)
493
00:35:46,436 --> 00:35:48,518
(♪ VAN HALEN: "Pretty Woman")
494
00:35:49,273 --> 00:35:50,684
♪ Whoo!
495
00:35:56,822 --> 00:36:00,485
♪ Pretty woman,
walking down the street
496
00:36:00,617 --> 00:36:04,326
♪ Pretty woman,
the kind I like to meet
497
00:36:04,454 --> 00:36:06,036
♪ Pretty woman
498
00:36:07,039 --> 00:36:10,829
♪ I don't believe you,
it must be true
499
00:36:10,960 --> 00:36:14,625
- ♪ No one can look as good as you...
- Who was that girl?
500
00:36:15,673 --> 00:36:17,710
- Excuse me!
- Get outta my way!
501
00:36:18,760 --> 00:36:20,501
We got her, we got her,
we got her.
502
00:36:22,431 --> 00:36:26,094
♪ Pretty woman,
won't you pardon me?
503
00:36:26,184 --> 00:36:30,179
♪ Pretty woman,
I couldn't help but see
504
00:36:30,481 --> 00:36:31,891
Hey!
505
00:36:32,690 --> 00:36:36,434
♪ Oh, you look lovely as can be... ♪
506
00:36:38,237 --> 00:36:39,443
Hey!
507
00:36:40,199 --> 00:36:41,405
Hi.
508
00:36:43,827 --> 00:36:45,989
- That's Ian.
- This is Max.
509
00:36:47,079 --> 00:36:49,117
We call him Mad Max.
510
00:36:50,666 --> 00:36:53,125
- (Max) We saw you on the escalator.
- Yeah.
511
00:36:54,170 --> 00:36:56,628
Yeah, you were looking at us, right?
512
00:36:56,757 --> 00:36:58,246
Yeah.
513
00:37:04,472 --> 00:37:07,840
- So what are you doing?
- Nothing. I'm waiting for my ride.
514
00:37:07,976 --> 00:37:10,057
(Horn blaring)
515
00:37:10,186 --> 00:37:12,393
(Screaming and shouting)
516
00:37:22,615 --> 00:37:25,733
Lis, come on, hon. We're running late.
517
00:37:25,869 --> 00:37:27,826
Honey, move.
518
00:37:28,496 --> 00:37:30,329
Speak to you later.
519
00:37:41,009 --> 00:37:44,876
She likes the rough stuff.
What can I do, you know?
520
00:37:49,934 --> 00:37:53,347
By the way, there's a party
tonight at Wyatt's house.
521
00:37:53,480 --> 00:37:57,643
You can find his name in
the students' directory under Donnelly.
522
00:37:57,775 --> 00:37:59,358
Pass the word around.
523
00:38:03,824 --> 00:38:05,313
Party?
524
00:38:05,449 --> 00:38:07,440
(Revving and screeching)
525
00:38:13,208 --> 00:38:14,664
Don't ask.
526
00:38:16,795 --> 00:38:18,956
Wyatt, you're gonna have a heart attack
by the time you're 40
527
00:38:19,088 --> 00:38:21,420
if you don't learn to relax.
528
00:38:21,550 --> 00:38:23,791
Have you tried inversion boots?
529
00:38:24,677 --> 00:38:27,635
Lisa, you don't understand my parents.
530
00:38:28,974 --> 00:38:30,681
(Lisa)
What's there to understand?
531
00:38:30,809 --> 00:38:34,222
They're oppressive, meddlesome,
difficult, demanding and totally bizarre.
532
00:38:34,353 --> 00:38:36,139
I mean, they're normal parents.
533
00:38:36,273 --> 00:38:39,014
Now stop worrying
and go and get dressed.
534
00:38:40,235 --> 00:38:42,476
(Wyatt) Lisa, I created you.
535
00:38:42,612 --> 00:38:45,320
Why do you do insist
on doing things I don't want?
536
00:38:45,449 --> 00:38:48,032
Honey buns, you want to party so badly,
you could bottle it.
537
00:38:48,159 --> 00:38:50,447
I mean, you and Gary,
you want friends, you want popularity,
538
00:38:50,579 --> 00:38:52,364
you want all that stuff, right?
539
00:38:52,496 --> 00:38:55,204
Well, I've thought about it, sure, but...
540
00:38:56,751 --> 00:38:58,833
So I'm giving it to you.
541
00:39:00,797 --> 00:39:02,378
Thank you, really, thank you.
542
00:39:02,507 --> 00:39:05,090
But I don't want it in my house.
543
00:39:05,217 --> 00:39:08,835
If you want to be a party animal,
you have to learn to live in the jungle.
544
00:39:08,972 --> 00:39:11,463
Now stop worrying
and go and get dressed.
545
00:39:11,599 --> 00:39:14,057
I'm going to go and pick up Gary.
546
00:39:14,186 --> 00:39:16,518
I can't wait to meet his parents.
547
00:39:24,570 --> 00:39:26,983
Do you go to Gary's school?
548
00:39:28,992 --> 00:39:31,949
Do I look like I'm in high school?
549
00:39:32,079 --> 00:39:33,318
No.
550
00:39:33,454 --> 00:39:37,789
Well, what it is, Dad, she's a foreign
exchange student, you know,
551
00:39:37,918 --> 00:39:40,831
and they have, like, a different
educational system around the world.
552
00:39:40,963 --> 00:39:42,579
You look very, er...
553
00:39:43,965 --> 00:39:45,376
...mature.
554
00:39:45,509 --> 00:39:49,719
Doesn't she? That's funny you say that
cos I was thinking the same thing.
555
00:39:49,846 --> 00:39:51,427
And what happened was that, uh...
556
00:39:51,556 --> 00:39:53,637
So what do you do for a living, Al?
557
00:39:54,184 --> 00:39:56,471
I'm an independent businessman.
558
00:39:56,603 --> 00:40:01,063
Al... Dad... My dad's a plumber.
And he's into plumbing.
559
00:40:01,190 --> 00:40:03,648
And, well, I guess you plumb,
right, Dad?
560
00:40:04,652 --> 00:40:06,268
Yeah.
561
00:40:06,405 --> 00:40:08,271
Yeah, well, I, uh...
562
00:40:08,407 --> 00:40:12,115
- I think it's time to go. You ready?
- Where do you think you're going?
563
00:40:12,244 --> 00:40:14,235
- To a party.
- To a movie.
564
00:40:15,246 --> 00:40:17,237
Movie party is what it is, folks.
565
00:40:17,373 --> 00:40:19,956
- We're going to a movie party.
- Such a little liar.
566
00:40:20,085 --> 00:40:23,793
No, I've whipped up this nasty little
soirée over at his friend Wyatt's house.
567
00:40:23,922 --> 00:40:27,880
- "Soir" what?
- Soirée, honey. I think that means party.
568
00:40:29,010 --> 00:40:30,376
Party.
569
00:40:30,512 --> 00:40:32,503
You know, there's going to be
sex, drugs, rock 'n' roll,
570
00:40:32,639 --> 00:40:34,505
chips, dips, chains, whips...
571
00:40:34,641 --> 00:40:37,224
You know, your basic
high school orgy type of thing.
572
00:40:37,351 --> 00:40:40,969
I mean, I'm not talking
candle wax on the nipples
573
00:40:41,106 --> 00:40:42,938
or witchcraft or anything like that.
574
00:40:43,065 --> 00:40:45,978
No, no, no, no,
just a couple of hundred kids
575
00:40:46,110 --> 00:40:48,943
running around in their underwear
acting like complete animals.
576
00:40:49,072 --> 00:40:52,235
- (Screaming)
- Alright, goddamn it! I've heard enough!
577
00:40:52,367 --> 00:40:54,403
- Gary, you get to your room!
- Yes, sir!
578
00:40:54,536 --> 00:40:57,778
No, it's OK. Just sit here.
I'll take care of this.
579
00:40:57,914 --> 00:41:02,157
Girlie, you get the hell outta here
before I throw you out.
580
00:41:02,293 --> 00:41:04,534
Don't threaten me, Al!
581
00:41:04,670 --> 00:41:07,208
You're out of shape.
I'll kick your arse.
582
00:41:07,340 --> 00:41:11,503
I'm going to make
this real easy for you.
583
00:41:11,635 --> 00:41:15,094
I'm taking Gary to a party.
584
00:41:15,222 --> 00:41:17,009
Over my dead body.
585
00:41:17,141 --> 00:41:22,807
He's a good kid. He studies hard.
You've got no complaints.
586
00:41:22,938 --> 00:41:25,431
If anybody should be bitching,
it should be Gary.
587
00:41:26,233 --> 00:41:28,440
You ever compliment him
on his grades?
588
00:41:28,570 --> 00:41:30,936
You ever compliment him
on anything?
589
00:41:31,072 --> 00:41:34,282
Hey! Hey!
Look, Ma, compliments embarrass me.
590
00:41:34,409 --> 00:41:36,150
- Dad, you know...
- (Both) Shut up!
591
00:41:37,954 --> 00:41:40,411
Have you ever wondered how sad it is
592
00:41:40,539 --> 00:41:43,452
that your son's only sexual outlet
593
00:41:43,585 --> 00:41:46,827
is tossing off to magazines
in the bathroom?
594
00:41:46,963 --> 00:41:48,748
Oh, Gary!
595
00:41:48,882 --> 00:41:52,590
Ma, I never tossed off to anything!
596
00:41:52,719 --> 00:41:56,257
- You told me you were combing your hair!
- But I was! I was! Mom!
597
00:41:56,389 --> 00:41:59,347
- Gary, shut up!
- The water's running all day long...
598
00:41:59,476 --> 00:42:02,137
- Shut up!
- I've never tossed off!
599
00:42:02,269 --> 00:42:05,557
- I've never tossed off!
- And you wouldn't tell your own mother!
600
00:42:05,690 --> 00:42:06,851
Shut up!
601
00:42:06,983 --> 00:42:09,190
Shut up! Shut up!
602
00:42:11,737 --> 00:42:14,730
This guy deserves a party.
603
00:42:15,324 --> 00:42:18,032
Look, I don't know who you are,
604
00:42:18,161 --> 00:42:21,449
what you are,
or where you came from,
605
00:42:22,206 --> 00:42:24,539
but I'm not taking any more of this.
606
00:42:25,501 --> 00:42:29,291
Dial the police, Lucy.
Dial the damn police and give me the phone.
607
00:42:29,422 --> 00:42:33,507
The phone...
I'm going to get the...
608
00:42:33,635 --> 00:42:36,878
- Give me the phone.
- I'm trying to... Well, here it is.
609
00:42:43,478 --> 00:42:47,266
Jesus, God. Oh, Christ.
610
00:42:47,398 --> 00:42:49,811
Oh, Lord God.
611
00:42:52,862 --> 00:42:55,400
Oh... Uh-oh...
612
00:42:56,365 --> 00:42:57,981
Go ahead...
613
00:42:58,827 --> 00:43:00,487
Make your day?
614
00:43:02,664 --> 00:43:04,074
(Tires screech)
615
00:43:06,333 --> 00:43:08,871
I'm really sorry it has to come to this.
616
00:43:09,003 --> 00:43:10,494
Come to what?
617
00:43:11,755 --> 00:43:14,873
If you don't cheer up,
I'll blow your face off.
618
00:43:27,313 --> 00:43:29,976
Oh, come on, don't be such an old lady.
Everything's cool.
619
00:43:30,108 --> 00:43:32,144
Everything's cool!
Everything's cool.
620
00:43:32,277 --> 00:43:34,233
Yeah, yeah.
My dad's going to castrate me.
621
00:43:34,362 --> 00:43:36,353
And my mother almost had,
like, a cardiac arrest.
622
00:43:36,489 --> 00:43:39,527
My parents'll never let me in the house,
and if they do, I'll be grounded till I'm 45.
623
00:43:39,659 --> 00:43:41,650
Other than that, everything's great.
Everything's just really cool.
624
00:43:41,786 --> 00:43:44,197
I mean, you know, it couldn't be better.
625
00:43:45,331 --> 00:43:47,494
Listen, trust me for once, will you?
626
00:43:49,753 --> 00:43:52,244
They don't know what happened.
627
00:43:55,507 --> 00:43:59,342
Did you think Gary was acting
a little strangely this evening?
628
00:44:01,389 --> 00:44:02,675
Gary?
629
00:44:04,141 --> 00:44:05,597
Who's Gary?
630
00:44:10,356 --> 00:44:13,315
Lisa, you have to promise me
631
00:44:13,443 --> 00:44:15,775
that things aren't gonna
get out of control.
632
00:44:15,903 --> 00:44:19,646
Wyatt, don't worry.
You're just having a few friends over.
633
00:44:19,782 --> 00:44:21,989
I don't have any friends, Lisa.
634
00:44:22,117 --> 00:44:23,733
He doesn't.
635
00:44:25,121 --> 00:44:26,907
Boy ain't lying.
636
00:44:27,039 --> 00:44:28,701
(Doorbell rings)
637
00:44:28,833 --> 00:44:30,494
You do now.
638
00:44:38,885 --> 00:44:39,965
Hi.
639
00:44:40,094 --> 00:44:42,507
(All) Hi!
640
00:44:42,639 --> 00:44:43,719
(Boy) Party!
641
00:44:43,847 --> 00:44:47,306
(All) Party! Party! Party! Party!
642
00:44:47,434 --> 00:44:49,096
Party! Party! Party! Party!
643
00:44:49,228 --> 00:44:51,061
(♪ LOS LOBOS: "Don't Worry Baby")
644
00:44:51,188 --> 00:44:53,601
♪ Standin' there by the window
645
00:44:53,733 --> 00:44:56,190
♪ Starin' out at the night
646
00:44:56,318 --> 00:44:58,731
♪ You've got so many troubles
647
00:44:58,862 --> 00:45:01,275
♪ On your nervous mind
648
00:45:01,407 --> 00:45:03,820
♪ But don't worry, baby
649
00:45:03,952 --> 00:45:06,193
♪ It's gonna work out fine
650
00:45:06,329 --> 00:45:09,320
♪ You hear the sound of footsteps
651
00:45:09,456 --> 00:45:11,789
♪ Stealing across the floor
652
00:45:11,918 --> 00:45:14,125
♪ You picked up the receiver...
653
00:45:14,670 --> 00:45:16,001
Yo!
654
00:45:16,130 --> 00:45:18,918
Who's here? How you doing?
How you doing?
655
00:45:20,092 --> 00:45:21,878
- Where's the bar?
- Bar!
656
00:45:25,222 --> 00:45:28,010
Do you think
they'll embarrass us tonight?
657
00:45:28,143 --> 00:45:29,554
Yeah.
658
00:45:29,686 --> 00:45:31,302
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
659
00:45:36,650 --> 00:45:37,936
Caviar?
660
00:45:38,902 --> 00:45:41,735
If Max and Ian see her,
it is all over for us.
661
00:45:43,615 --> 00:45:46,699
- How's your stomach?
- It's a little better.
662
00:45:46,827 --> 00:45:50,195
If you're gonna float an air biscuit,
let me know, OK?
663
00:45:50,331 --> 00:45:51,914
Float a what?
664
00:45:52,041 --> 00:45:53,907
If you're gonna fart,
if you're gonna squeeze cheese,
665
00:45:54,043 --> 00:45:55,626
let me know, OK?
I'll hit the fan.
666
00:45:55,753 --> 00:45:58,746
I'm sorry, Gary,
it's just I suffer pain and discomfort
667
00:45:58,882 --> 00:46:01,715
due to occasional stomach upset.
668
00:46:01,842 --> 00:46:04,755
You know, I can't believe this, Wyatt.
I'm so disappointed in us.
669
00:46:04,887 --> 00:46:06,969
All we ever do is sit around
and talk about how great it would be
670
00:46:07,097 --> 00:46:08,554
if we went to parties, right?
671
00:46:08,682 --> 00:46:11,094
And now it's our party, and there are
hundreds of people here having a great time,
672
00:46:11,226 --> 00:46:13,059
and we're in the john.
we're in the john!
673
00:46:13,188 --> 00:46:16,931
- I can't believe it.
- Gary, you're just as uptight as I am.
674
00:46:17,067 --> 00:46:19,559
Let me tell you something.
Nobody can be as uptight as you, OK?
675
00:46:19,693 --> 00:46:21,731
Nobody.
Your middle name is tense, OK?
676
00:46:21,862 --> 00:46:23,445
Wyatt "Tense Up" Donnelly.
677
00:46:23,572 --> 00:46:26,235
- Alright, this is true. This is true.
- It's true.
678
00:46:26,367 --> 00:46:31,204
But... it's not that bad.
I mean, we can hear the music.
679
00:46:32,039 --> 00:46:33,530
We can dance, so that's great.
680
00:46:33,666 --> 00:46:35,907
If we put our noses to the door,
maybe we can smell the food.
681
00:46:36,043 --> 00:46:37,534
Hey, brother!
682
00:46:37,670 --> 00:46:40,036
What's happening, my main man?
683
00:46:40,172 --> 00:46:41,458
Right on!
684
00:46:42,132 --> 00:46:44,295
- Scotch.
- Straight up?
685
00:46:44,427 --> 00:46:46,134
Ah, give me the whole bottle.
686
00:46:46,262 --> 00:46:51,097
Tell you what... you bend over
and I'll shove it straight up your ass.
687
00:46:52,309 --> 00:46:55,097
- On the rocks is fine.
- (Laughs)
688
00:46:56,563 --> 00:46:59,556
Yeah, that's what I thought
you were gonna say, you jive turkey.
689
00:47:12,996 --> 00:47:14,112
There she is.
690
00:47:14,248 --> 00:47:16,159
You deal with the drinks.
I'll kill the girls.
691
00:47:48,449 --> 00:47:50,360
- Hi.
- Hi!
692
00:47:52,411 --> 00:47:53,867
OK, OK, OK...
693
00:47:53,996 --> 00:47:56,237
- Did we see you at the mall today?
- Yes.
694
00:47:56,373 --> 00:47:57,864
Oh, yeah!
695
00:48:00,670 --> 00:48:03,128
It's alright... Um...
696
00:48:03,255 --> 00:48:05,623
- What are you doing here?
- I'm living here now.
697
00:48:05,757 --> 00:48:07,668
I'm Wyatt and Gary's girlfriend.
698
00:48:07,802 --> 00:48:10,418
- No!
- (Laughing)
699
00:48:11,264 --> 00:48:15,427
Ah! OK...
We're Wyatt's friends.
700
00:48:15,559 --> 00:48:18,393
Er... can we come to the party
or should we just bail?
701
00:48:18,521 --> 00:48:20,103
Bail!
702
00:48:21,315 --> 00:48:22,851
(Muttering)
703
00:48:22,983 --> 00:48:25,396
- No, no, come in, come on.
- Really?
704
00:48:25,527 --> 00:48:26,938
Oh, thank you.
705
00:48:27,905 --> 00:48:30,193
Gary and Wyatt are around here
someplace.
706
00:48:30,324 --> 00:48:32,782
I wonder if Lisa's having a good time.
707
00:48:32,911 --> 00:48:36,449
Lisa could have a good time
at an insurance seminar, Wyatt.
708
00:48:36,581 --> 00:48:39,572
You know,
the thing that really galls me
709
00:48:40,793 --> 00:48:44,206
is that she's ours
and we can't get close to her.
710
00:48:46,798 --> 00:48:48,289
Hit the fan.
711
00:48:51,929 --> 00:48:53,887
This is, like, the best party
I've ever been to.
712
00:48:54,014 --> 00:48:56,302
I know. It's great!
713
00:48:56,434 --> 00:48:58,971
Do you know whose house this is?
714
00:48:59,103 --> 00:49:03,391
I don't know. I think it might be
that girl with the English accent.
715
00:49:03,525 --> 00:49:07,268
Did you notice that girl doesn't have a zit
on her whole body? Did you notice that?
716
00:49:07,402 --> 00:49:10,565
- I know. She has, like, zero fat.
- And she's so relaxed.
717
00:49:10,697 --> 00:49:12,780
- She burped and it was, like, charming.
- Charming.
718
00:49:12,909 --> 00:49:13,989
Yeah!
719
00:49:15,786 --> 00:49:16,992
Shit.
720
00:49:18,331 --> 00:49:20,163
- Ah, yeah.
- The bathroom.
721
00:49:28,257 --> 00:49:29,498
- Ladies.
- Hi.
722
00:49:29,634 --> 00:49:31,045
Hi.
723
00:49:32,554 --> 00:49:34,295
I can't believe you! I cannot...
724
00:49:34,429 --> 00:49:37,012
You're dropping wolf bait
and there are chicks outside!
725
00:49:37,141 --> 00:49:40,474
Light a match or something!
Light a fire, I don't know.
726
00:49:42,688 --> 00:49:44,429
Hi.
727
00:49:44,565 --> 00:49:45,976
Hi.
728
00:49:46,108 --> 00:49:48,646
We're sorry. We thought
there were just girls in there.
729
00:49:48,777 --> 00:49:51,735
- I'm sorry.
- It's just us dudes, you know.
730
00:49:51,864 --> 00:49:53,525
What are you doing here?
731
00:49:54,199 --> 00:49:56,782
(Wyatt) Gary was just taking a shit!
732
00:49:56,911 --> 00:49:58,572
No, what I meant was...
733
00:50:00,873 --> 00:50:03,911
No, no, what I meant was,
what are you doing at the party?
734
00:50:04,043 --> 00:50:07,331
- Oh, it's my house.
- This is your party?
735
00:50:07,463 --> 00:50:10,376
Yeah, well, you know,
we like to do this about once a week,
736
00:50:10,507 --> 00:50:12,795
throw little gatherings here,
little get-togethers, that kind of thing.
737
00:50:12,927 --> 00:50:14,884
- Haven't you guys been by?
- No.
738
00:50:15,012 --> 00:50:17,094
No? How the heck did we miss
these two, Wyatt?
739
00:50:17,222 --> 00:50:19,806
I don't know.
So many people, so many parties.
740
00:50:19,934 --> 00:50:23,518
So many people, you know,
and so many parties, you lose track...
741
00:50:23,646 --> 00:50:27,264
Um... would you mind if I came in
and checked my face?
742
00:50:27,400 --> 00:50:29,516
What's wrong with your face?
743
00:50:31,570 --> 00:50:32,902
Can we come in?
744
00:50:33,030 --> 00:50:35,739
- Come on in.
- (Wyatt) Sure, yeah. OK. Be our guests.
745
00:50:35,867 --> 00:50:38,858
- Thanks, guys.
- Come on in.
746
00:50:40,996 --> 00:50:42,954
Well, um...
747
00:50:43,081 --> 00:50:45,072
We've seen you guys at school,
but we've never met.
748
00:50:45,208 --> 00:50:46,574
- You're Hilly.
- You're Deb.
749
00:50:46,710 --> 00:50:48,201
- How you doing?
- Deb.
750
00:50:48,338 --> 00:50:50,329
- Hi. I'm Gary.
- I'm Wyatt.
751
00:50:50,465 --> 00:50:52,297
Well, what have you guys been doing?
752
00:50:54,092 --> 00:50:57,802
This is a wild crowd. I didn't know
you guys had so many friends.
753
00:50:57,929 --> 00:50:59,887
- Yeah, neither did we.
- Neither did we.
754
00:51:01,059 --> 00:51:05,222
Uh, who's the girl with the accent?
I thought that this was her party, but...
755
00:51:05,355 --> 00:51:09,222
You mean the real sensuous, exotic,
sexy, mature, sex symbol type?
756
00:51:09,358 --> 00:51:10,974
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
757
00:51:11,110 --> 00:51:13,442
(Gary) She's with us.
758
00:51:13,570 --> 00:51:15,902
She's with you guys?
759
00:51:16,532 --> 00:51:18,568
Come on, Lisa. Why not?
760
00:51:20,494 --> 00:51:23,657
Because I belong to Gary and Wyatt.
761
00:51:23,789 --> 00:51:27,875
Belong? What? They make you
in the garage with power tools?
762
00:51:28,001 --> 00:51:30,083
They own you? Control you?
763
00:51:30,213 --> 00:51:33,001
- Seriously?
- Seriously.
764
00:51:33,132 --> 00:51:34,496
They're toads.
765
00:51:34,634 --> 00:51:37,217
Do I look like I'd go out
with two toads?
766
00:51:38,512 --> 00:51:41,505
You do. It's true.
767
00:51:41,641 --> 00:51:45,804
I think Gary and Wyatt are gonna force
everyone to redefine their terms.
768
00:51:45,936 --> 00:51:47,552
(Blows raspberry)
769
00:51:47,688 --> 00:51:50,556
And you're completely loyal to them?
770
00:51:50,692 --> 00:51:53,809
I do whatever they say.
771
00:52:05,206 --> 00:52:06,367
Hi.
772
00:52:09,168 --> 00:52:12,786
Could you excuse us
for a minute, please?
773
00:52:12,922 --> 00:52:15,880
Ah, that's no problem.
Yeah, we'll be in here.
774
00:52:16,007 --> 00:52:17,418
Yeah.
775
00:52:25,351 --> 00:52:26,967
OK, fine.
776
00:52:30,606 --> 00:52:32,722
I could be wrong, but I think
these ladies are stoked for us, Wyatt.
777
00:52:32,858 --> 00:52:34,599
- I got that feeling myself.
- What do we do?
778
00:52:34,735 --> 00:52:36,101
- I don't know.
- Should we go for it?
779
00:52:36,237 --> 00:52:37,943
- What about Lisa?
- She did say we should party.
780
00:52:38,072 --> 00:52:40,188
Let's get it on with these two,
score points and go back to Lisa.
781
00:52:40,324 --> 00:52:41,655
This is like a dream come true.
782
00:52:41,784 --> 00:52:44,572
How about if we see if we can score
with these two in case we can't later?
783
00:52:44,704 --> 00:52:46,740
- Sounds good.
- But we gotta give Lisa a shot.
784
00:52:46,873 --> 00:52:50,206
I don't wanna hurt her feelings. The girls
want a long, lean bone job from me.
785
00:52:50,333 --> 00:52:51,744
- Ready to party down?
- 10-4.
786
00:52:51,878 --> 00:52:53,117
- Let's break.
- Break.
787
00:52:54,505 --> 00:52:55,960
(Squeaking)
788
00:53:05,391 --> 00:53:07,382
Those guys are weird,
but they're kind of cute.
789
00:53:07,518 --> 00:53:09,007
- Hi.
- Hi!
790
00:53:09,144 --> 00:53:12,557
And where did you two disappear to?
791
00:53:12,690 --> 00:53:15,932
- Nowhere. We were in the kitchen.
- We were in the bathroom.
792
00:53:16,860 --> 00:53:18,726
- Eating.
- Doing our hair.
793
00:53:18,862 --> 00:53:20,853
Have you met Gary and Wyatt?
794
00:53:21,449 --> 00:53:23,485
- Yeah.
- No.
795
00:53:23,617 --> 00:53:24,903
Sort of.
796
00:53:26,996 --> 00:53:30,614
If you get the chance... shower with them.
797
00:53:30,750 --> 00:53:33,788
I did. It's a mind scrambler!
798
00:53:34,628 --> 00:53:36,619
Oh! Hurts so good.
799
00:53:42,302 --> 00:53:44,543
She took a shower with them.
800
00:53:44,679 --> 00:53:47,512
- I have a wonderful idea, Henry.
- Hmm?
801
00:53:47,641 --> 00:53:51,760
After dinner, why don't we stop by
and visit with Wyatt?
802
00:53:51,896 --> 00:53:55,730
I hate to think of his being
alone at home tonight.
803
00:53:55,858 --> 00:53:59,567
- Doesn't he have anything to read?
- Well, I don't know, dear.
804
00:53:59,695 --> 00:54:03,063
But you know nothing's
more important to a teenage boy
805
00:54:03,199 --> 00:54:05,405
than his grandparents.
806
00:54:05,534 --> 00:54:07,445
- We'll drop by.
- Oh, good.
807
00:54:08,704 --> 00:54:10,286
(♪ Rock music playing)
808
00:54:13,876 --> 00:54:15,286
(Screaming)
809
00:54:21,342 --> 00:54:25,835
I'd like to open up by apologizing
for the Icee today at the mall.
810
00:54:25,972 --> 00:54:28,679
It was very immature, and I'm sorry.
811
00:54:28,807 --> 00:54:32,641
- And, uh...
- It was just, like, tomfoolery.
812
00:54:32,769 --> 00:54:34,601
(Max) But we are sorry.
813
00:54:34,730 --> 00:54:37,141
- It happened.
- Yeah.
814
00:54:37,817 --> 00:54:41,150
So what's the deal with Lisa?
You know, can we borrow her?
815
00:54:41,778 --> 00:54:44,146
Uh... we can't do that, guys,
816
00:54:44,282 --> 00:54:46,523
because common decency
prohibits us, we can't.
817
00:54:46,659 --> 00:54:48,070
It's not cool.
818
00:54:48,202 --> 00:54:50,489
- Well, she said it was cool.
- Yeah.
819
00:54:50,621 --> 00:54:54,454
We can't take advantage
of her loyalty. Sorry, guys.
820
00:54:54,583 --> 00:54:57,496
Man, but that's really selfish.
That hurts, you know.
821
00:54:57,628 --> 00:54:58,867
Ian, uh...
822
00:54:59,505 --> 00:55:01,496
Just forget it, guys,
cos we can't do it, you know?
823
00:55:01,632 --> 00:55:04,545
Ah, come on.
Quit being such pricks.
824
00:55:04,677 --> 00:55:05,791
Hey, come on.
825
00:55:05,927 --> 00:55:07,918
Regardless of what
she may have told you,
826
00:55:08,054 --> 00:55:10,262
our feelings for Lisa run very deep.
827
00:55:10,391 --> 00:55:12,849
It's, like, emotions.
Heavy, heavy emotions.
828
00:55:12,976 --> 00:55:15,844
Our feelings for Deb and Hilly run
as deep as yours do for Lisa.
829
00:55:15,980 --> 00:55:17,391
And it's respect.
830
00:55:17,523 --> 00:55:19,764
It's like the time
we spent together, you know.
831
00:55:19,900 --> 00:55:22,858
And a couple of guys like you
deserve them.
832
00:55:22,987 --> 00:55:25,523
See, we like your style.
So we wanna make a deal with you.
833
00:55:25,655 --> 00:55:27,771
You let us have a crack at Lisa,
834
00:55:27,909 --> 00:55:30,650
and then we'll let you have
Deb and Hilly.
835
00:55:32,746 --> 00:55:34,612
Can you guys keep a secret?
836
00:55:34,748 --> 00:55:37,161
- Sure.
- Secret?
837
00:55:37,293 --> 00:55:40,206
- Look again. It's Gary.
- No, no.
838
00:55:40,338 --> 00:55:42,500
It's our boy, Gary.
839
00:55:42,632 --> 00:55:45,465
He's our 16-year-old boy.
840
00:55:45,592 --> 00:55:48,335
I don't know what the hell
you're talking about, Lucy.
841
00:55:48,471 --> 00:55:50,882
And I want you to shut up.
842
00:55:51,681 --> 00:55:55,219
(Max) I feel like an asshole.
This had better work.
843
00:55:55,353 --> 00:55:57,936
This is just the blueprint.
OK, now look. You like it?
844
00:55:58,063 --> 00:55:59,771
(Max and Ian)
Bigger tits.
845
00:55:59,898 --> 00:56:01,230
Go, go, go, go!
846
00:56:01,358 --> 00:56:03,144
Give him the knee-shooters.
I don't care.
847
00:56:05,695 --> 00:56:09,690
(Man) 'We have code penetration again.
What the hell's going on in here?'
848
00:56:10,992 --> 00:56:13,108
(Thunderclap)
849
00:56:15,373 --> 00:56:17,204
Excuse me, Arthur.
850
00:56:17,333 --> 00:56:19,494
- It's Art.
- Excuse me, Art.
851
00:56:34,141 --> 00:56:35,597
Oh, shit.
852
00:56:38,353 --> 00:56:41,597
(Screaming)
853
00:56:41,731 --> 00:56:42,722
♪ Weird
854
00:56:45,277 --> 00:56:47,063
♪ Weird science
855
00:56:48,947 --> 00:56:50,358
(All scream)
856
00:56:51,074 --> 00:56:52,907
- 'Where's Eddie?'
- 'Eddie's down in the lab.
857
00:56:53,034 --> 00:56:55,072
'He and Grandpa are working
on a new project.'
858
00:56:55,204 --> 00:56:57,786
- 'Another invention?'
- (Laughing)
859
00:56:57,914 --> 00:57:00,202
'It's got something to do with a robot.'
860
00:57:04,797 --> 00:57:06,628
(Hysterical laughter)
861
00:57:13,889 --> 00:57:17,132
(Max) Wyatt, what's going on?
Turn this thing off!
862
00:57:17,268 --> 00:57:19,384
You're gonna love it!
How you doing?
863
00:57:19,519 --> 00:57:22,137
I'm shitting in my pants!
864
00:57:32,365 --> 00:57:33,697
(♪ Playing piano)
865
00:57:58,641 --> 00:58:00,474
(Screams)
866
00:58:09,987 --> 00:58:11,693
(Screaming)
867
00:58:28,380 --> 00:58:29,835
(Silence descends)
868
00:58:36,262 --> 00:58:37,673
(Whimpering)
869
00:58:41,476 --> 00:58:42,887
It worked.
870
00:59:00,996 --> 00:59:05,081
You had to be big shots, didn't you?
You had to show off.
871
00:59:06,251 --> 00:59:08,914
When are you going to learn
people will like you for what you are,
872
00:59:09,045 --> 00:59:11,036
not for what you can give them?
873
00:59:13,217 --> 00:59:15,708
In your race for power and glory,
874
00:59:15,844 --> 00:59:18,632
you forgot one small detail.
875
00:59:20,141 --> 00:59:21,972
We forgot to hook up the doll.
876
00:59:22,101 --> 00:59:24,684
You forgot to hook up the doll.
877
00:59:42,204 --> 00:59:43,911
(High-pitched scream)
878
01:00:03,391 --> 01:00:05,599
(Shouting and glass breaking)
879
01:00:07,271 --> 01:00:09,228
Something's going on here, Carmen.
880
01:00:09,356 --> 01:00:12,690
I have a feeling we're not
going to approve, Henry.
881
01:00:14,320 --> 01:00:16,936
A missile! A missile!
882
01:00:17,907 --> 01:00:20,239
A missile in my house, Gary!
883
01:00:22,452 --> 01:00:26,572
- Yeah, this puppy's for real, alright.
- It was an accident. Simple, you know...
884
01:00:26,706 --> 01:00:28,994
Accident, my ass, Gary!
885
01:00:29,126 --> 01:00:31,367
My parents are coming home.
Chet's coming home.
886
01:00:31,503 --> 01:00:35,166
- They're gonna freak out!
- They're gonna shit eggrolls.
887
01:00:35,298 --> 01:00:37,882
Get out! Get out! Scat!
888
01:00:38,010 --> 01:00:40,626
Out of here,
you disgusting tramps!
889
01:00:40,762 --> 01:00:42,719
You, you, you hosers!
890
01:00:42,847 --> 01:00:44,838
Out! Out! Out!
891
01:00:44,974 --> 01:00:47,056
My God, cut that out, would you?
892
01:00:47,186 --> 01:00:49,347
You ought to know better
than to walk into somebody's house
893
01:00:49,480 --> 01:00:51,686
and start hitting people
with your Rex Harrison hat!
894
01:00:51,815 --> 01:00:55,307
This is my daughter's home.
Who the hell are you?
895
01:00:55,443 --> 01:00:59,277
Well, I'm a very dear, close
personal friend of your grandson's.
896
01:00:59,405 --> 01:01:01,443
Henry, call the police.
897
01:01:01,574 --> 01:01:04,237
I will.
I'll have you incarcerated.
898
01:01:04,369 --> 01:01:06,782
Here's the deal, folks.
899
01:01:06,914 --> 01:01:10,657
Gary and Wyatt,
they created me on their computer.
900
01:01:10,793 --> 01:01:14,161
I'm not going to stand here
and listen to this baloney.
901
01:01:14,295 --> 01:01:17,505
He won't, you know.
He doesn't stand for baloney.
902
01:01:18,050 --> 01:01:21,168
Would you mind waiting here?
I won't be a moment.
903
01:01:23,597 --> 01:01:25,588
Have you ever?
904
01:01:26,432 --> 01:01:27,719
Never.
905
01:01:28,726 --> 01:01:32,061
Excuse me, guys.
Wyatt, your grandparents are downstairs.
906
01:01:32,188 --> 01:01:33,771
OK. Thanks, Lis.
907
01:01:38,027 --> 01:01:39,938
- Lisa!
- Yes?
908
01:01:40,072 --> 01:01:42,108
Where are my grandparents?
909
01:01:42,699 --> 01:01:45,782
- Wyatt, your kitchen is blue.
- You want to try one?
910
01:01:45,911 --> 01:01:47,777
Where are my grandparents, Lisa?
911
01:01:47,913 --> 01:01:50,119
They're all taken care of, OK?
912
01:01:57,172 --> 01:01:59,413
You're going to love this one.
913
01:02:05,222 --> 01:02:07,634
- Are they all right?
- They're fine.
914
01:02:07,766 --> 01:02:12,476
In fact, they're better than fine.
They're not aging anymore.
915
01:02:13,188 --> 01:02:14,974
See? They're smiling.
916
01:02:16,692 --> 01:02:19,228
Uh... Lisa, if any more
of his relatives drop by,
917
01:02:19,360 --> 01:02:22,068
we'll be upstairs in the bathroom, OK?
918
01:02:22,197 --> 01:02:24,188
That's pretty sick, Lis.
919
01:02:24,657 --> 01:02:28,025
Those guys really need
some self-confidence.
920
01:02:29,163 --> 01:02:34,498
A challenge. Something that'll bring out
their inner strength and courage.
921
01:02:39,380 --> 01:02:41,418
I'm so bloody clever.
922
01:02:44,844 --> 01:02:46,130
Now!
923
01:02:46,262 --> 01:02:47,878
(Engine revving)
924
01:02:51,268 --> 01:02:54,010
(♪ Soft music over dialogue)
925
01:03:10,204 --> 01:03:12,114
(Screaming)
926
01:03:20,630 --> 01:03:22,668
(Shrieking)
927
01:03:34,644 --> 01:03:36,681
This Bud's for you.
928
01:03:44,405 --> 01:03:46,942
- This party's lame, Max.
- What about the girls?
929
01:03:48,617 --> 01:03:50,608
Girls, shmirls!
930
01:04:11,472 --> 01:04:14,931
Lisa! What's going on?
931
01:04:16,103 --> 01:04:17,559
Aargh!
932
01:04:35,164 --> 01:04:37,530
Gary! Gary, Gary...
933
01:04:37,666 --> 01:04:39,452
Gary, listen to me.
934
01:04:39,585 --> 01:04:42,452
There are motorcycles
in my house!
935
01:04:43,880 --> 01:04:46,588
Wyatt, there are killer mutants
in your house, OK?
936
01:05:06,737 --> 01:05:09,023
(Both) Screw the house.
937
01:05:48,778 --> 01:05:50,143
Guys, you have uninvited guests.
938
01:05:50,280 --> 01:05:52,237
I think you better come out
and ask them to leave.
939
01:05:52,365 --> 01:05:53,902
They're getting pretty rowdy.
940
01:05:59,498 --> 01:06:03,161
This is an excellent chance for you
to prove your bravery and courage.
941
01:06:03,293 --> 01:06:06,284
Those are outdated concepts, alright?
Excuse us.
942
01:06:07,672 --> 01:06:09,960
Don't let John Wayne hear you say that.
943
01:06:10,092 --> 01:06:12,173
The man is dead, Lisa, OK?
944
01:06:14,137 --> 01:06:16,878
Well, so are you,
if you don't deal with this situation.
945
01:06:17,014 --> 01:06:18,425
(Glass breaking)
946
01:06:19,434 --> 01:06:21,050
(Both) No, thanks.
947
01:06:23,646 --> 01:06:25,762
(Wyatt) Gary, do you feel
like a chicken?
948
01:06:26,440 --> 01:06:29,650
Wyatt, if I could shoot an egg
out my ass right now, I would.
949
01:06:31,947 --> 01:06:36,362
What about all these people?
Will they think we're cowards?
950
01:06:37,911 --> 01:06:39,072
I don't know.
951
01:06:39,204 --> 01:06:41,992
Look, we can deal with shame, OK?
Death is a much deeper issue.
952
01:06:42,123 --> 01:06:43,739
(Man growling)
953
01:07:07,773 --> 01:07:10,481
Uh... we're going to get you guys
some drinks.
954
01:07:10,610 --> 01:07:12,443
You look like a Scotch man.
You want some...
955
01:07:12,570 --> 01:07:14,608
- We're gonna get some stuff...
- Ah!
956
01:07:15,865 --> 01:07:18,903
Is this your party?
957
01:07:20,286 --> 01:07:21,492
Uh...
958
01:07:22,539 --> 01:07:26,702
- Well, yeah kind of.
- I don't know if you can call it a party.
959
01:07:26,835 --> 01:07:28,541
It's just a few friends.
960
01:07:28,670 --> 01:07:29,909
How come...
961
01:07:31,505 --> 01:07:35,625
...two unpopular dicks like you
962
01:07:35,760 --> 01:07:37,547
is having a party?
963
01:07:38,221 --> 01:07:41,554
I don't know. I mean, I guess I was
just asking myself that very question.
964
01:07:41,682 --> 01:07:44,344
- And I'm like dicks, sometimes...
- Look, we're very sorry.
965
01:07:44,978 --> 01:07:48,936
How would you like
all your friends here to know...
966
01:07:50,317 --> 01:07:54,106
...that you wear a bra on your head?
967
01:07:54,237 --> 01:07:56,228
(All laughing)
968
01:08:02,161 --> 01:08:05,324
Tossed off into any good books lately,
have we?
969
01:08:10,253 --> 01:08:13,746
You two can't even take a shower
970
01:08:14,840 --> 01:08:17,707
with a beautiful woman
971
01:08:17,844 --> 01:08:20,586
without wearing your jeans!
972
01:08:22,849 --> 01:08:24,180
(Snorts)
973
01:08:29,523 --> 01:08:31,184
You!
974
01:08:31,315 --> 01:08:32,898
Come here!
975
01:08:35,153 --> 01:08:36,609
Now!
976
01:08:36,738 --> 01:08:38,149
(Snarls)
977
01:08:44,996 --> 01:08:46,407
(Screaming)
978
01:08:55,798 --> 01:08:58,917
- Prepare to die, Wyatt.
- Gary, I can't wait to die.
979
01:08:59,051 --> 01:09:01,463
- We are gonna kick...
- Ass.
980
01:09:01,595 --> 01:09:04,384
OK. This is war.
981
01:09:04,515 --> 01:09:07,850
Hands off the girls. Let's leave
the girls out of this. Hands off.
982
01:09:10,146 --> 01:09:12,729
I said hands off! Now!
983
01:09:23,618 --> 01:09:25,529
Why don't you shut up, bitch?
984
01:09:31,752 --> 01:09:34,664
And as for your ugly ass,
let me tell you something.
985
01:09:34,796 --> 01:09:38,333
You don't come into my friend's house
with your faggot friends,
986
01:09:38,466 --> 01:09:40,582
driving your motorbikes
all over his floors,
987
01:09:40,719 --> 01:09:43,301
breaking windows, making a mess,
stinking up the place.
988
01:09:43,430 --> 01:09:44,920
And believe me, you do stink.
989
01:09:49,560 --> 01:09:51,927
And here's what's gonna happen.
990
01:09:52,063 --> 01:09:53,724
You're gonna let go of the girls,
991
01:09:53,856 --> 01:09:57,225
and you're going to apologize
to all these people.
992
01:09:57,359 --> 01:10:01,569
And you're gonna get on your bikes
and pedal your ugly asses out of here.
993
01:10:01,698 --> 01:10:03,109
(Laughing)
994
01:10:04,868 --> 01:10:08,327
So now, we're gentlemen,
so we're gonna give you a choice.
995
01:10:08,913 --> 01:10:11,029
Yeah, you can leave in peace...
996
01:10:15,420 --> 01:10:17,957
Or you can stay and die.
997
01:10:29,600 --> 01:10:31,307
Choice is yours.
998
01:10:49,996 --> 01:10:51,578
(Growls)
999
01:11:02,801 --> 01:11:04,632
(Roars)
1000
01:11:10,559 --> 01:11:11,970
Get out of here.
1001
01:11:17,314 --> 01:11:20,056
Beg your pardon.
You have a lovely home.
1002
01:11:21,110 --> 01:11:24,854
Terribly sorry.
Call me. We'll have lunch.
1003
01:11:24,989 --> 01:11:27,197
Can we keep this between us?
1004
01:11:28,993 --> 01:11:31,405
I'd hate to lose my teaching job.
1005
01:11:36,251 --> 01:11:37,662
God bless you.
1006
01:11:48,889 --> 01:11:52,472
I can't believe... You know...
Is everyone alright? I just want to know.
1007
01:11:52,600 --> 01:11:54,682
This is so exciting.
You know, we're heroes.
1008
01:11:54,810 --> 01:11:57,143
These guys came into your house
and we showed them down.
1009
01:11:57,271 --> 01:12:00,765
I can't believe this. Know what we did?
You and me saved all these people, Wyatt.
1010
01:12:00,900 --> 01:12:02,641
You don't understand that.
We're heroes.
1011
01:12:02,777 --> 01:12:05,564
This could mean a guest shot on
Phil Donahue. But this is exciting, man!
1012
01:12:05,697 --> 01:12:06,903
- Gary!
- What?
1013
01:12:07,032 --> 01:12:10,399
- Where the hell did you get that thing?
- Squirt gun, man. That's it.
1014
01:12:11,118 --> 01:12:12,529
(Screaming)
1015
01:12:21,337 --> 01:12:23,170
That's my boys.
1016
01:12:34,434 --> 01:12:36,425
What a weird night, huh?
1017
01:12:38,896 --> 01:12:41,434
You really weren't afraid of those guys?
1018
01:12:44,527 --> 01:12:48,520
I was scared.
But what could I do?
1019
01:12:56,456 --> 01:13:00,791
It's probably a good idea for me not
to ask too many questions about tonight.
1020
01:13:00,918 --> 01:13:02,375
Probably.
1021
01:13:02,503 --> 01:13:04,996
This is a sort of a night of weird shit.
1022
01:13:05,131 --> 01:13:09,090
I was wondering if I can ask you
something kind of strange?
1023
01:13:14,849 --> 01:13:16,680
Would you kiss me?
1024
01:13:19,436 --> 01:13:21,474
What about Ian?
1025
01:13:24,567 --> 01:13:26,399
We all make mistakes.
1026
01:13:29,447 --> 01:13:31,859
- OK.
- OK...
1027
01:13:33,659 --> 01:13:35,492
Where do you want it?
1028
01:13:38,832 --> 01:13:41,414
Can I ask you a question?
1029
01:13:41,542 --> 01:13:42,873
Yeah.
1030
01:13:43,877 --> 01:13:45,914
How do you feel about Lisa?
1031
01:13:47,090 --> 01:13:48,579
I love her.
1032
01:13:50,260 --> 01:13:52,717
That's what I figured.
1033
01:13:52,845 --> 01:13:54,256
But, um...
1034
01:13:56,682 --> 01:13:59,265
...I mean, it's definitely
a different kind of love, you know.
1035
01:13:59,394 --> 01:14:02,636
It's... it's more sisterly, you know,
1036
01:14:02,771 --> 01:14:04,854
like big sisterly, kind of.
1037
01:14:05,859 --> 01:14:07,770
But she's so beautiful.
1038
01:14:11,113 --> 01:14:13,104
Yeah, she's really beautiful.
1039
01:14:14,408 --> 01:14:16,900
And her body is...
1040
01:14:17,037 --> 01:14:18,653
It's gorgeous.
1041
01:14:19,747 --> 01:14:21,579
It's a nice figure.
1042
01:14:22,708 --> 01:14:23,948
So...
1043
01:14:26,880 --> 01:14:29,622
I mean, what would I be
compared to her?
1044
01:14:30,550 --> 01:14:36,386
Deb, Lisa is everything
I ever wanted in a girl...
1045
01:14:38,265 --> 01:14:40,927
...before I knew what I wanted.
1046
01:14:41,060 --> 01:14:46,271
I know that if I could do it again...
I'd make her just like you.
1047
01:14:49,860 --> 01:14:51,317
Honest.
1048
01:15:00,329 --> 01:15:03,573
Dead honest.
I'm like... I... You know, I...
1049
01:15:03,707 --> 01:15:05,414
I gotta tell you cos I'm really honest
when I say that.
1050
01:15:05,542 --> 01:15:08,376
I'm so very honest. I mean that.
1051
01:15:59,639 --> 01:16:01,300
What the hell?
1052
01:16:03,768 --> 01:16:07,351
That little bastard. That little...
1053
01:16:08,564 --> 01:16:10,896
Please don't let him
have messed up my room.
1054
01:16:11,024 --> 01:16:13,356
If my room's OK,
I won't kill him, I promise.
1055
01:16:13,485 --> 01:16:15,648
I'll just hurt him real bad.
1056
01:16:44,766 --> 01:16:46,177
Freeze.
1057
01:16:47,936 --> 01:16:49,176
Chet!
1058
01:16:49,771 --> 01:16:52,059
Where's my brother?
1059
01:16:52,192 --> 01:16:53,523
Ow!
1060
01:16:54,484 --> 01:16:57,021
Uhh... I don't know.
1061
01:16:58,363 --> 01:17:00,195
You're dead meat, pilgrim.
1062
01:17:02,577 --> 01:17:04,738
Um...
1063
01:17:04,871 --> 01:17:07,613
Chet, Chet, Chet, Chet, Chet,
that's her nose. Come on.
1064
01:17:07,748 --> 01:17:09,489
Now, look, she has nothing to do with it.
1065
01:17:09,626 --> 01:17:12,913
OK. You die.
1066
01:17:13,046 --> 01:17:15,707
She walks out of here with a severe limp.
1067
01:17:21,720 --> 01:17:22,801
Aargh.
1068
01:17:23,805 --> 01:17:25,421
I'll be back.
1069
01:17:30,438 --> 01:17:34,806
That's Wyatt's older brother, Chet.
He's kind of an asshole.
1070
01:17:37,862 --> 01:17:39,603
Oh, hi, Chet.
1071
01:17:39,738 --> 01:17:42,981
What the hell is going on
around here?
1072
01:17:43,117 --> 01:17:45,028
Chet, I'm sorry, it was an accident.
1073
01:17:45,161 --> 01:17:47,402
An accident? An accident?
1074
01:17:48,247 --> 01:17:51,865
Do you realize it's snowing
in my room, goddamn it?
1075
01:17:52,668 --> 01:17:54,659
Some real weird shit happened, Chet.
Some real weird...
1076
01:17:54,796 --> 01:17:58,585
You don't have to be a genius
to figure that out, monkey dick.
1077
01:18:00,510 --> 01:18:04,377
- Start talking, little man.
- Look, Chet, it's a real long story.
1078
01:18:04,514 --> 01:18:06,380
Gary and I were messing around
with the computer Friday night,
1079
01:18:06,515 --> 01:18:09,132
and we decided to make a woman, and
she went crazy and messed up the house.
1080
01:18:09,269 --> 01:18:12,226
Don't smart-mouth me,
you wormy little shit!
1081
01:18:12,354 --> 01:18:13,810
Why don't you just leave him alone?
1082
01:18:13,939 --> 01:18:16,398
Stay out of this, bimbo.
This is a family matter.
1083
01:18:16,525 --> 01:18:20,269
Chet, just let me find Lisa.
She can explain everything.
1084
01:18:20,404 --> 01:18:23,648
She'll clear everything up, Chet.
I swear. Chet.
1085
01:18:23,783 --> 01:18:28,323
You can have my college money
and my social security, Chet.
1086
01:18:28,453 --> 01:18:29,659
(Panting)
1087
01:18:29,788 --> 01:18:31,654
Chet...
1088
01:18:33,917 --> 01:18:38,002
So, you guys think you can
pull one over on me, huh?
1089
01:18:38,131 --> 01:18:39,462
Huh?
1090
01:18:39,590 --> 01:18:43,298
You got everybody synched
to the same bullshit story.
1091
01:18:43,427 --> 01:18:46,886
This isn't bullshit.
This is a Pershing missile, Chip.
1092
01:18:47,015 --> 01:18:48,846
It's Chet.
1093
01:18:49,350 --> 01:18:50,966
My name is Chet.
1094
01:18:52,936 --> 01:18:55,895
And I didn't think
it was a whale's dick, honey.
1095
01:18:56,024 --> 01:18:57,890
(Burps)
1096
01:18:59,777 --> 01:19:01,768
Hi, Nanny. Hi, Grampy.
1097
01:19:03,739 --> 01:19:06,106
I'm not a moron, you know. I...
1098
01:19:09,996 --> 01:19:11,657
Was that my grandparents?
1099
01:19:17,377 --> 01:19:20,712
- Are they dead?
- Oh, no, they're just resting.
1100
01:19:20,840 --> 01:19:23,252
What are they doing in here?
1101
01:19:23,384 --> 01:19:25,671
(Lisa) I put them in there.
1102
01:19:25,802 --> 01:19:28,511
I didn't want the boys
to get into trouble.
1103
01:19:29,181 --> 01:19:32,390
And quite frankly, they weren't
having a very good time at the party.
1104
01:19:32,518 --> 01:19:34,259
(Chet) Not having a good time?
1105
01:19:34,395 --> 01:19:37,979
Do you think they're having a good time
being catatonic in a closet?
1106
01:19:39,609 --> 01:19:43,978
Do you have any idea
how disrespectful that is?
1107
01:19:44,988 --> 01:19:49,608
Boy, I wouldn't give a squirt of piss
for your ass right now.
1108
01:19:55,082 --> 01:19:58,074
OK, that's quite enough.
You guys get the girls home.
1109
01:19:58,211 --> 01:20:02,375
Wyatt, take the Porsche.
Gary, you take the Ferrari.
1110
01:20:02,506 --> 01:20:03,747
The Ferrari?
1111
01:20:04,926 --> 01:20:06,917
I want to be alone with Chet here.
1112
01:20:07,052 --> 01:20:09,090
- Good to see you again, Chet.
- Get out of here!
1113
01:20:09,221 --> 01:20:11,212
Come on,
take your little hussies home!
1114
01:20:11,349 --> 01:20:14,011
Their parents are probably
worried sick.
1115
01:20:16,561 --> 01:20:21,806
Lady, I want to get
to the bottom of this, A.S.A.F.P.
1116
01:20:21,943 --> 01:20:23,774
Oh, so do I.
1117
01:20:26,072 --> 01:20:29,609
But first, I'd like to...
butter your muffin.
1118
01:20:29,742 --> 01:20:31,733
Why do you have
to be such a wanker?
1119
01:20:31,868 --> 01:20:33,905
Because I get off on it.
1120
01:20:34,037 --> 01:20:38,157
Now I want you to promise
that you'll keep your big mouth shut
1121
01:20:38,292 --> 01:20:40,908
about everything that has happened
here this weekend.
1122
01:20:41,045 --> 01:20:44,708
And I want you to treat Wyatt and Gary
with dignity and respect.
1123
01:20:44,841 --> 01:20:46,627
Oh, really?
1124
01:20:46,759 --> 01:20:48,500
Yeah. Oh, really.
1125
01:20:50,262 --> 01:20:56,179
I can be a real serious bitch
if I don't get what I want.
1126
01:20:56,310 --> 01:21:00,052
Ooh, hit me with your best shot.
1127
01:21:05,903 --> 01:21:07,984
How fast are you going?
1128
01:21:08,113 --> 01:21:09,604
About 35.
1129
01:21:15,412 --> 01:21:16,823
(Siren wailing)
1130
01:21:21,335 --> 01:21:25,123
- Wait. This can't be right.
- Are you looking at the RPMs?
1131
01:21:25,256 --> 01:21:28,543
No, I think I'm looking
at about fifty tickets.
1132
01:21:44,024 --> 01:21:45,435
Bye!
1133
01:22:15,931 --> 01:22:17,764
Goddamn train!
1134
01:22:17,891 --> 01:22:20,132
Oh, my. Phew!
1135
01:22:21,061 --> 01:22:22,972
That was great!
1136
01:22:31,988 --> 01:22:33,399
You son of a bitch!
1137
01:22:33,533 --> 01:22:37,150
Al! Al! Al, that was Gary!
1138
01:22:37,286 --> 01:22:39,823
Who is this Gary character?
1139
01:22:42,625 --> 01:22:45,117
I had a really great time last night.
1140
01:22:46,628 --> 01:22:50,167
I'll probably be grounded
for a month or so, but...
1141
01:22:51,926 --> 01:22:53,542
I'll wait for you.
1142
01:23:29,255 --> 01:23:31,087
Hilly!
1143
01:23:31,215 --> 01:23:32,831
I love you!
1144
01:23:40,181 --> 01:23:41,797
Alright!
1145
01:23:47,189 --> 01:23:49,055
I want to thank you for a great night.
1146
01:23:49,190 --> 01:23:50,601
Same here.
1147
01:23:53,029 --> 01:23:55,270
Deb, I have kind of a confession
to make.
1148
01:23:59,452 --> 01:24:01,533
I'm really not this cool.
1149
01:24:03,079 --> 01:24:05,117
That's not my car.
1150
01:24:05,248 --> 01:24:07,661
This is not my suit.
1151
01:24:07,792 --> 01:24:10,409
I mean, none of those people
were my friends.
1152
01:24:11,505 --> 01:24:13,917
Why are you telling me all of this?
1153
01:24:15,885 --> 01:24:18,627
Because I want you to like me
for what I am.
1154
01:24:18,762 --> 01:24:21,220
Whatever you are, I like it.
1155
01:24:41,243 --> 01:24:45,032
Well, um,
I'd better get going, cos, um...
1156
01:24:46,539 --> 01:24:48,577
...Wyatt and I still have to deal with Chet.
1157
01:24:48,708 --> 01:24:50,746
Quit screwing around!
1158
01:24:50,877 --> 01:24:53,869
This ain't funny, you stupid bitch!
1159
01:24:54,006 --> 01:24:56,918
Oh, now careful, Chet.
Don't make me angry.
1160
01:24:57,051 --> 01:24:58,381
Sorry.
1161
01:24:58,511 --> 01:24:59,671
(Farts)
1162
01:25:01,764 --> 01:25:03,595
That's better.
1163
01:25:03,724 --> 01:25:07,182
Would you please turn me
back to normal, please?
1164
01:25:07,310 --> 01:25:09,802
I haven't done anything to you.
1165
01:25:09,939 --> 01:25:12,350
No, but you've done plenty
to your brother.
1166
01:25:12,483 --> 01:25:15,850
- Like what?
- Well, let me see...
1167
01:25:15,985 --> 01:25:19,024
You've nagged him, harassed him,
suppressed him,
1168
01:25:19,155 --> 01:25:22,194
kept him in fear of you,
extorted money from him.
1169
01:25:22,326 --> 01:25:24,408
It's done out of love.
1170
01:25:25,078 --> 01:25:28,367
Just for that, I ought to give you
a set of elephant balls.
1171
01:25:28,498 --> 01:25:29,659
(Groans)
1172
01:25:34,546 --> 01:25:38,541
Give me your word that
you'll leave Wyatt and Gary alone,
1173
01:25:38,676 --> 01:25:40,292
and I'll change you back.
1174
01:25:40,427 --> 01:25:43,011
Oh, all right.
1175
01:25:43,139 --> 01:25:45,130
Shake on it, huh?
1176
01:25:47,350 --> 01:25:49,717
No, thanks. I'd rather not.
1177
01:25:50,854 --> 01:25:52,811
Wait! Where are you going?
1178
01:25:53,858 --> 01:25:56,099
Well, I have to go and get changed.
1179
01:25:56,234 --> 01:25:58,851
- What about me?
- What about you? You'll be fine.
1180
01:25:58,988 --> 01:26:01,524
It just takes a little while
for the effect to wear off, OK?
1181
01:26:14,002 --> 01:26:15,163
Well?
1182
01:26:16,463 --> 01:26:18,296
I'm in love.
1183
01:26:18,423 --> 01:26:21,131
- It's great, isn't it?
- The best.
1184
01:26:21,260 --> 01:26:23,796
You know, I'll tell you, Wyatt,
1185
01:26:23,929 --> 01:26:25,886
I think things are turning
around for us.
1186
01:26:26,015 --> 01:26:27,426
I mean it.
1187
01:26:27,557 --> 01:26:29,640
OK, what about Lisa?
1188
01:26:33,396 --> 01:26:35,512
Well, I think we're gonna have
to have a talk with her.
1189
01:26:37,400 --> 01:26:39,141
Think she'll understand?
1190
01:26:40,195 --> 01:26:42,813
I think so. I mean, uh...
1191
01:26:42,948 --> 01:26:45,484
I sure as hell wouldn't want
to date you.
1192
01:26:47,203 --> 01:26:49,534
You're not my type, you know.
1193
01:26:55,711 --> 01:26:57,327
(Wyatt) Chet?
1194
01:26:58,255 --> 01:26:59,461
Chet?
1195
01:27:01,341 --> 01:27:02,752
Hi, dudes!
1196
01:27:07,014 --> 01:27:09,176
I'm sorry, Wyatt.
1197
01:27:09,307 --> 01:27:12,676
I'm sorry for being such a shit to you
all these years.
1198
01:27:13,395 --> 01:27:16,478
And, gee, well,
I want you to know that...
1199
01:27:17,774 --> 01:27:19,481
...I love you.
1200
01:27:19,609 --> 01:27:21,192
(Burps)
1201
01:27:21,319 --> 01:27:23,481
(Retches and laughs)
1202
01:27:24,405 --> 01:27:26,396
That's nasty, Wyatt.
1203
01:27:27,283 --> 01:27:29,274
That's Chet, Gary.
1204
01:27:29,411 --> 01:27:30,650
(Fly buzzing)
1205
01:27:30,787 --> 01:27:32,824
Hey, hey, huh...
1206
01:27:38,878 --> 01:27:40,118
Hmm!
1207
01:27:40,256 --> 01:27:41,837
(Burps and farts)
1208
01:27:41,966 --> 01:27:43,421
Oh, my God!
1209
01:27:46,345 --> 01:27:47,881
(Wyatt) Lisa?
1210
01:27:48,012 --> 01:27:49,595
In here!
1211
01:27:49,722 --> 01:27:52,055
- Lisa?
- Yeah?
1212
01:27:53,060 --> 01:27:56,269
- You saw Chet?
- Yes, I did.
1213
01:27:56,396 --> 01:27:58,387
(Wyatt) You responsible?
1214
01:27:59,483 --> 01:28:00,894
Yes, I am.
1215
01:28:01,025 --> 01:28:03,233
Lisa, we can't have him like that.
1216
01:28:04,738 --> 01:28:06,774
It'd ruin Christmas.
1217
01:28:08,158 --> 01:28:10,399
Listen, he's gonna be fine
in half an hour.
1218
01:28:10,536 --> 01:28:13,744
He's not going to spoil Christmas.
1219
01:28:13,872 --> 01:28:17,082
And he's not going to bug you
anymore, either.
1220
01:28:17,208 --> 01:28:19,041
(Clears throat) Um...
1221
01:28:19,920 --> 01:28:23,002
Lisa, we have to have a talk with you.
1222
01:28:23,131 --> 01:28:25,338
What's on your mind?
1223
01:28:26,135 --> 01:28:29,092
I really don't know
how to say this to you.
1224
01:28:29,762 --> 01:28:31,845
You guys found girlfriends, right?
1225
01:28:34,268 --> 01:28:38,056
Fell in love with the two girls,
and they fell in love with you.
1226
01:28:39,064 --> 01:28:41,475
That's all I ever wanted for you.
1227
01:28:42,484 --> 01:28:44,065
You're not hurt?
1228
01:28:45,654 --> 01:28:47,860
Yeah, sure I'm hurt.
1229
01:28:48,698 --> 01:28:51,157
But I wouldn't change it.
1230
01:28:51,284 --> 01:28:52,774
(Sniffs)
1231
01:28:52,912 --> 01:28:57,155
I'm really just getting off
seeing you two guys straightened out.
1232
01:29:03,922 --> 01:29:05,538
(Sighs heavily)
1233
01:29:06,716 --> 01:29:08,707
I have to go.
1234
01:29:25,277 --> 01:29:26,641
Oh...
1235
01:29:27,654 --> 01:29:29,737
I've had a wonderful time.
1236
01:29:40,292 --> 01:29:41,953
Lisa...
1237
01:29:44,505 --> 01:29:45,916
Bye.
1238
01:29:59,144 --> 01:30:01,055
(Metallic screeching)
1239
01:30:42,186 --> 01:30:44,349
(Heavy thud)
1240
01:31:03,917 --> 01:31:05,328
Boys?
1241
01:31:06,336 --> 01:31:07,917
We're home!
1242
01:31:12,885 --> 01:31:16,344
- Hi, Mr. Donnelly. How are you?
- Hi, honey.
1243
01:31:16,930 --> 01:31:19,591
- Dad, hi.
- No, no, no, no. Like a man.
1244
01:31:20,559 --> 01:31:23,893
(Mrs. Donnelly) So, what
did you guys do this weekend?
1245
01:31:24,020 --> 01:31:27,104
- Not much.
- Just hung around the house, you know.
1246
01:31:27,231 --> 01:31:29,222
Daddy had this crazy notion
1247
01:31:29,359 --> 01:31:32,943
you guys might throw a party
or do something nutty.
1248
01:31:33,072 --> 01:31:34,733
- Ha-ha!
- Shit.
1249
01:31:34,864 --> 01:31:36,275
- Not us.
- Not here.
1250
01:31:36,408 --> 01:31:37,694
(Both) No way.
1251
01:31:45,667 --> 01:31:47,078
(Bell ringing)
1252
01:31:50,421 --> 01:31:52,253
(Overlapping chatter)
1253
01:31:55,676 --> 01:31:57,292
(Whistle blows)
1254
01:31:59,806 --> 01:32:01,296
Shh, shh!
1255
01:32:03,851 --> 01:32:05,889
(♪ Fanfare intro:
"Theme From Rocky")
1256
01:32:22,328 --> 01:32:26,698
OK... drop and give me twenty.
1257
01:32:31,296 --> 01:32:33,957
(♪ OINGO BOINGO: "Weird Science")
♪ She's alive!
1258
01:32:34,091 --> 01:32:36,377
- ♪ Alive!
- ♪ Weird science
1259
01:32:42,181 --> 01:32:44,389
♪ Weird science
1260
01:32:44,518 --> 01:32:46,600
♪ Plastic tubes and pots and pans
1261
01:32:46,728 --> 01:32:49,095
♪ Bits and pieces
and magic from my hand
1262
01:32:49,230 --> 01:32:52,097
- ♪ We're making weird science
- ♪ Ooh!
1263
01:32:52,234 --> 01:32:54,020
♪ Plastic tubes and pots and pans
1264
01:32:54,153 --> 01:32:57,315
♪ Bits and pieces
and bits and pieces and bits...
1265
01:32:57,447 --> 01:32:59,188
♪ My creation
1266
01:32:59,323 --> 01:33:00,905
♪ Is it real?
1267
01:33:01,033 --> 01:33:03,992
♪ It's my creation,
Ooh, my creation
1268
01:33:04,121 --> 01:33:05,953
♪ It's my creation...
1269
01:33:19,677 --> 01:33:21,088
♪ Weird!
1270
01:33:21,721 --> 01:33:23,177
♪ Ooh!
1271
01:33:27,435 --> 01:33:29,643
- ♪ Weird science
- ♪ Ooh!
1272
01:33:29,770 --> 01:33:31,603
♪ Magic and technology
1273
01:33:31,731 --> 01:33:34,189
♪ Voodoo dolls and chants,
electricity
1274
01:33:34,318 --> 01:33:36,524
♪ We're making weird science
1275
01:33:37,237 --> 01:33:39,069
♪ Fantasy and microchips
1276
01:33:39,198 --> 01:33:42,280
♪ Bits and pieces
and bits and pieces and bits...
1277
01:33:42,408 --> 01:33:44,069
♪ My creation
1278
01:33:44,203 --> 01:33:45,944
♪ Is it real?
1279
01:33:46,078 --> 01:33:49,537
♪ It's my creation, I do not know
1280
01:33:49,666 --> 01:33:51,327
♪ No hesitation
1281
01:33:51,460 --> 01:33:53,417
♪ No heart of gold
1282
01:33:53,545 --> 01:33:55,252
♪ Just flesh and blood
1283
01:33:55,380 --> 01:33:57,712
♪ I do not know, I do not know!
1284
01:33:57,841 --> 01:33:59,752
♪ From my heart and from my hand
1285
01:33:59,885 --> 01:34:03,127
♪ Why don't people understand
my intentions?
1286
01:34:04,514 --> 01:34:07,506
♪ Ooh! Weird science
1287
01:34:07,643 --> 01:34:10,680
♪ Ooh! Ooh!
1288
01:34:13,314 --> 01:34:15,646
♪ Weird science
1289
01:34:15,775 --> 01:34:17,561
♪ Magic and technology
1290
01:34:17,694 --> 01:34:19,560
♪ Voodoo dolls and chants
1291
01:34:20,780 --> 01:34:23,068
♪ Weird science
1292
01:34:23,199 --> 01:34:25,065
♪ Things we've never seen before
1293
01:34:25,202 --> 01:34:26,863
♪ Behind bolted doors
1294
01:34:26,994 --> 01:34:30,033
♪ Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
Weird science
1295
01:34:30,164 --> 01:34:31,621
♪ Ooh!
1296
01:34:35,545 --> 01:34:36,876
♪ Weird!
1297
01:34:43,345 --> 01:34:45,051
♪ Weird science
1298
01:34:50,601 --> 01:34:52,592
♪ Weird science
1299
01:34:52,729 --> 01:34:54,970
♪ Ooh!
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
1300
01:34:55,106 --> 01:34:58,395
♪ Bits and pieces,
Bits and pieces
1301
01:34:58,527 --> 01:35:00,393
♪ Weird science
1302
01:35:09,621 --> 01:35:11,453
♪ My creation
1303
01:35:11,581 --> 01:35:13,162
♪ Is it real?
1304
01:35:13,292 --> 01:35:16,659
♪ It's my creation,
I do not know
1305
01:35:16,795 --> 01:35:18,877
♪ Ooh, my creation
1306
01:35:19,006 --> 01:35:20,587
♪ Is it real?
1307
01:35:20,716 --> 01:35:23,753
♪ Just flesh and blood,
Just flesh and blood
1308
01:35:23,885 --> 01:35:25,841
♪ Just flesh and blood
1309
01:35:42,404 --> 01:35:44,987
- ♪ Weird science
- ♪ Weird science
1310
01:35:48,076 --> 01:35:50,533
- ♪ Weird science
- ♪ Weird science
1311
01:35:53,707 --> 01:35:56,368
- ♪ Weird science
- ♪ Weird science
1312
01:35:57,543 --> 01:36:00,752
♪ Weird, weird, weird, weird science... ♪
98068
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