Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:38,960 --> 00:00:41,240
SEAGULLS CALL
2
00:00:43,190 --> 00:00:46,227
- Is he really here?
- He is, yeah.
3
00:00:46,440 --> 00:00:49,285
Do you think he got my letter
at the North Pole?
4
00:00:49,286 --> 00:00:50,606
Of course he did.
5
00:00:50,646 --> 00:00:53,286
Daddy, did you write him a letter?
6
00:00:53,326 --> 00:00:55,486
- Er, no. I didn't, James, no.
- Oh.
7
00:00:56,544 --> 00:00:58,271
Oh, look at that.
8
00:00:58,296 --> 00:01:01,674
Haven't they done a wonderful job
with the tree this year?
9
00:01:01,699 --> 00:01:05,179
CAROLLERS:♪ Good King Wenceslas
Looked out on the Feast of Stephen
10
00:01:05,326 --> 00:01:09,118
♪ When the snow lay round about
Deep and crisp and even... ♪
11
00:01:09,143 --> 00:01:10,583
TURKEY GOBBLES
12
00:01:11,021 --> 00:01:13,654
Hey, fancy guessing the weight
of the turkey, Doc?
13
00:01:13,679 --> 00:01:15,926
- One pound, two guesses.
- No.
14
00:01:15,966 --> 00:01:19,831
He's very friendly. Turns out
turkeys got a lot of personality.
15
00:01:19,856 --> 00:01:22,918
Hm. Make sure you wash your hands.
They're filthy.
16
00:01:22,919 --> 00:01:24,526
TURKEY GOBBLES
17
00:01:24,566 --> 00:01:26,806
CAROLLERS CONTINUE
18
00:01:28,286 --> 00:01:30,766
Has there always been Christmas?
19
00:01:30,821 --> 00:01:32,117
- Yeah.
- Er, no.
20
00:01:32,118 --> 00:01:33,966
Well, not ALWAYS always.
21
00:01:34,006 --> 00:01:35,846
No, it used to be called
the Winter Solstice,
22
00:01:35,886 --> 00:01:37,006
but in the fourth century,
23
00:01:37,046 --> 00:01:39,886
Pope Julius chose
the 25th of December for Christmas
24
00:01:39,926 --> 00:01:43,141
because he wanted to replace
the pagan Saturnalia festival.
25
00:01:43,166 --> 00:01:44,609
James!
26
00:01:45,223 --> 00:01:47,446
- Jenny.
- Hi!
27
00:01:47,486 --> 00:01:50,286
- Mm, delicious!
- Careful, Doc!
28
00:01:50,326 --> 00:01:52,686
Another inch,
you're under the mistletoe.
29
00:01:52,726 --> 00:01:55,548
Anyone who wanted
could lay a smacker on you.
30
00:01:55,549 --> 00:01:57,272
- SHE GULPS
- What?
31
00:01:57,686 --> 00:01:59,609
Mrs Tishell...
32
00:01:59,860 --> 00:02:03,686
No, I'm fine, Doc. I'm just fine.
33
00:02:05,006 --> 00:02:06,926
It's so nice to see you here, Doc.
34
00:02:06,966 --> 00:02:08,566
How long has this food been outside?
35
00:02:08,606 --> 00:02:10,126
Only since this morning.
36
00:02:10,166 --> 00:02:12,969
You should wear a hair net.
It's unhygienic.
37
00:02:13,246 --> 00:02:16,446
CAROLLERS:♪ Nine ladies dancing
Eight maids a-milking
38
00:02:16,486 --> 00:02:19,246
♪ Seven swans a-swimming
Six geese a-laying
39
00:02:19,301 --> 00:02:23,541
♪ Five gold rings... ♪
40
00:02:23,712 --> 00:02:25,952
I think that's my favourite song.
41
00:02:25,977 --> 00:02:28,366
Yeah, as Christmas ones go,
it's all right.
42
00:02:28,406 --> 00:02:31,641
No, not my favourite Christmas song.
My favourite song ever.
43
00:02:31,746 --> 00:02:35,086
This guy buys this girl
all these amazing gifts.
44
00:02:35,126 --> 00:02:37,846
Five gold rings, four calling birds,
45
00:02:38,111 --> 00:02:41,901
three French men... It's so romantic.
46
00:02:42,413 --> 00:02:44,114
I got you some eggnog.
47
00:02:44,427 --> 00:02:46,235
Oh, yeah, thanks.
48
00:02:47,492 --> 00:02:48,849
Happy Christmas!
49
00:02:48,874 --> 00:02:50,726
Oh, hello, James! Ha-ha.
50
00:02:50,766 --> 00:02:52,712
Are you here to see Santa?
51
00:02:53,246 --> 00:02:54,846
That'll be £10, please, Doc.
52
00:02:54,886 --> 00:02:56,110
- £10?
- Yeah.
53
00:02:56,111 --> 00:02:58,126
Oh... It's fine. Thanks.
54
00:02:58,166 --> 00:02:59,568
Thank you.
55
00:03:00,263 --> 00:03:01,941
£10, really (!)
56
00:03:02,412 --> 00:03:03,904
Merry Christmas, Doc.
57
00:03:04,446 --> 00:03:06,666
And what do you want for Christmas?
58
00:03:06,667 --> 00:03:09,989
Oh, an actual list. Excellent.
59
00:03:10,014 --> 00:03:12,206
- Ho-ho-ho-ho!
- Laura, look this way.
60
00:03:12,246 --> 00:03:14,366
And here's your present.
61
00:03:14,406 --> 00:03:15,607
Yeah, don't forget.
62
00:03:15,608 --> 00:03:17,926
Merry Christmas. Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!
63
00:03:17,966 --> 00:03:20,406
- Urgh, look at him.
- Martin.
64
00:03:23,126 --> 00:03:25,086
He keeps scratching.
65
00:03:25,126 --> 00:03:26,566
What, Santa?
66
00:03:26,606 --> 00:03:28,606
Well, he's probably just hot
under the lights.
67
00:03:28,646 --> 00:03:31,166
- Disgusting!
- Oi, Doc, move up.
68
00:03:31,206 --> 00:03:34,086
Ah, what do we have here?
69
00:03:34,126 --> 00:03:38,006
A smartly dressed young man
with a very nice tie.
70
00:03:38,046 --> 00:03:39,966
Did you tie that yourself?
71
00:03:40,006 --> 00:03:41,657
How wonderful.
72
00:03:41,658 --> 00:03:43,406
And what do you want for Christmas?
73
00:03:43,446 --> 00:03:45,766
- Look, don't, Martin.
- Excuse me.
74
00:03:45,806 --> 00:03:48,446
I'm afraid you'll
have to join the queue, big boy.
75
00:03:48,486 --> 00:03:50,646
You keep scratching.
Is there something wrong?
76
00:03:50,686 --> 00:03:54,057
Santa's got a new costume
and the material's a bit itchy.
77
00:03:54,089 --> 00:03:56,454
Now, come and tell Santa
what you want for Christmas.
78
00:03:56,486 --> 00:03:58,166
Uh-uh, no. Don't go any closer.
79
00:03:58,206 --> 00:03:59,806
He could be contagious. Let me see.
80
00:03:59,846 --> 00:04:02,286
- You're being ridiculous.
- Show me, please.
81
00:04:03,826 --> 00:04:07,246
- Doc, you're holding up the line!
- Leave Santa alone!
82
00:04:07,286 --> 00:04:09,926
- Leave it, Martin.
- Excuse me, what's the hold-up?
83
00:04:09,966 --> 00:04:12,246
Here, Doc, you're gonna
have to come out of there.
84
00:04:12,286 --> 00:04:14,779
This man has a potentially
infectious disease.
85
00:04:14,780 --> 00:04:18,086
That rash could be shingles,
erysipelas or scabies.
86
00:04:18,126 --> 00:04:20,406
A virus, a bacteria or a parasite.
87
00:04:20,446 --> 00:04:22,686
Do you really want to infect
your children? Do you?
88
00:04:22,726 --> 00:04:24,886
- Right, I want you to come with me.
- Seriously?
89
00:04:24,926 --> 00:04:27,486
Seriously. Come with me.
You need to fumigate this place.
90
00:04:27,526 --> 00:04:29,406
Doc, I think you're over-reacting,
just a tad.
91
00:04:29,446 --> 00:04:32,446
- Shut it down. Come on.
- Sorry, he does mean well.
92
00:04:32,486 --> 00:04:35,046
Right, you heard what the doc said.
Everybody out.
93
00:04:35,086 --> 00:04:38,006
Come on now. Out you go.
I'm sorry, no returns.
94
00:04:38,046 --> 00:04:41,126
- That's what I said, no returns.
- I'm sorry, don't be sad.
95
00:04:41,166 --> 00:04:43,446
We'll come back next year.
96
00:04:43,486 --> 00:04:46,126
There'll be other Santas, other grottos.
97
00:04:47,606 --> 00:04:49,766
You get on the examination table,
please.
98
00:04:49,806 --> 00:04:51,766
Take off your boot
and roll up your trouser leg.
99
00:04:53,709 --> 00:04:56,566
- How long have you had this for?
- A week or so.
100
00:04:56,770 --> 00:04:59,650
I'm sorry, I can't hear what you're
saying. Take that beard off.
101
00:05:04,654 --> 00:05:07,486
Probably allergic to the material
in the costume.
102
00:05:07,526 --> 00:05:09,406
Do you have a history of allergies?
103
00:05:09,446 --> 00:05:12,772
No. Do you have a history
of ruining Christmas?
104
00:05:13,166 --> 00:05:14,606
I didn't ruin Christmas.
105
00:05:14,646 --> 00:05:17,773
All those traumatised children
who saw you drag away Santa
106
00:05:17,798 --> 00:05:19,351
might well disagree on that.
107
00:05:19,376 --> 00:05:21,326
It doesn't look like
an allergic reaction to me.
108
00:05:21,366 --> 00:05:24,309
- I'll do a punch biopsy.
- A biopsy?
109
00:05:24,486 --> 00:05:26,646
Won't I have to go to hospital for that?
110
00:05:26,701 --> 00:05:29,461
Er, no. This has a blade which removes
111
00:05:29,486 --> 00:05:32,086
a small plug of skin through
the epidermis and the dermis,
112
00:05:32,126 --> 00:05:33,606
into the subcutaneous fat below.
113
00:05:33,646 --> 00:05:37,446
- Do you have any other symptoms?
- At my age, there's always something.
114
00:05:37,486 --> 00:05:39,793
Aches and pains, wear and tear.
115
00:05:40,326 --> 00:05:44,726
I lost some weight. Stomach's been
a bit dodgy. Probably nerves.
116
00:05:44,766 --> 00:05:45,722
Nerves?
117
00:05:45,723 --> 00:05:49,806
My job is to bring joy and wonder
to the children of Portwenn.
118
00:05:49,846 --> 00:05:51,366
I take that seriously.
119
00:05:51,406 --> 00:05:54,406
- Do you suffer from fatigue?
- I don't suffer, Doc.
120
00:05:54,446 --> 00:05:55,824
I enjoy the work.
121
00:05:56,366 --> 00:05:59,246
But, yes, it does take a lot
out of me, I suppose.
122
00:05:59,286 --> 00:06:02,807
Right, I'll take a blood sample,
check if you're anaemic or not.
123
00:06:02,808 --> 00:06:06,606
Poke away. So long as it lets me
get back out there and do my job.
124
00:06:06,646 --> 00:06:08,846
Er, no, you're not to mix
with children, I'm afraid.
125
00:06:08,886 --> 00:06:11,246
Until we've discovered
if you're infectious or not.
126
00:06:12,846 --> 00:06:17,486
I-I've got a big surprise lined up
for the village on Christmas Eve.
127
00:06:17,526 --> 00:06:19,046
I really don't wanna let folk down.
128
00:06:19,086 --> 00:06:21,926
I'm sorry, you're not going anywhere
until we have your test results.
129
00:06:21,966 --> 00:06:23,687
I should have the blood
available tomorrow
130
00:06:23,688 --> 00:06:26,366
and the biopsy sometime next week.
131
00:06:26,429 --> 00:06:28,428
Not a fan of Christmas, are you?
132
00:06:28,594 --> 00:06:30,661
I don't have any feelings about it
either way.
133
00:06:30,686 --> 00:06:32,646
Doesn't come across my desk.
134
00:06:33,806 --> 00:06:37,526
Somebody needs to show you
the true magic of the season, Doc.
135
00:06:37,566 --> 00:06:40,286
I'm sure they do, thank you.
And we're finished for now.
136
00:06:46,556 --> 00:06:48,406
Close the door on your way out, please.
137
00:07:00,032 --> 00:07:01,712
How are you?
138
00:07:01,744 --> 00:07:04,432
Is Santa angry at us?
139
00:07:04,635 --> 00:07:07,006
No, of course not.
140
00:07:07,046 --> 00:07:10,084
I didn't get to meet him.
141
00:07:10,298 --> 00:07:13,995
I'm sorry. It's such a shame.
142
00:07:15,797 --> 00:07:17,437
Here, come and sit down.
143
00:07:20,846 --> 00:07:22,316
Aw...
144
00:07:22,486 --> 00:07:25,053
You know, when I was your age,
145
00:07:25,054 --> 00:07:27,606
Portwenn used to have
a lantern parade on Christmas Eve.
146
00:07:27,646 --> 00:07:29,280
And it was so lovely.
147
00:07:29,305 --> 00:07:31,566
All these lights
would be coming down the hill,
148
00:07:31,606 --> 00:07:33,606
with Santa Claus at the front.
149
00:07:33,646 --> 00:07:35,766
Can we do that?
150
00:07:36,470 --> 00:07:41,854
Well, no, cos someone would need
to arrange and organise it.
151
00:07:41,879 --> 00:07:44,699
- You could.
- Oh, I didn't mean me.
152
00:07:44,700 --> 00:07:47,575
And I could get to meet Santa.
153
00:07:47,679 --> 00:07:49,246
Well, yeah, you could,
154
00:07:49,286 --> 00:07:51,926
but it's Christmas Eve tomorrow, so...
155
00:07:51,966 --> 00:07:53,446
Please.
156
00:07:54,877 --> 00:07:57,347
..so I suppose
I'd better get a move on, right?
157
00:07:57,372 --> 00:07:58,846
Yes.
158
00:08:02,751 --> 00:08:04,726
Tomorrow? That's short notice.
159
00:08:04,766 --> 00:08:07,806
I just want James to have
a Christmas he won't forget.
160
00:08:07,846 --> 00:08:11,486
You know, I have all these
happy memories of it as a child.
161
00:08:11,533 --> 00:08:14,053
You know, the parade and the lights.
162
00:08:14,086 --> 00:08:16,486
And I still remember the little
red bike my father gave me
163
00:08:16,526 --> 00:08:17,726
when I was four.
164
00:08:17,766 --> 00:08:20,606
- Yes, probably stolen.
- Martin!
165
00:08:20,646 --> 00:08:22,886
PHONE RINGS
166
00:08:27,064 --> 00:08:28,236
Ellingham.
167
00:08:28,886 --> 00:08:29,953
Yes.
168
00:08:30,606 --> 00:08:31,766
I am.
169
00:08:35,526 --> 00:08:36,515
Ah...
170
00:08:37,166 --> 00:08:38,486
I see.
171
00:08:40,356 --> 00:08:41,399
Right.
172
00:08:42,286 --> 00:08:43,846
When would that be?
173
00:08:45,629 --> 00:08:48,149
Yes. I see.
174
00:08:49,806 --> 00:08:50,926
Thank you.
175
00:08:53,361 --> 00:08:54,521
Everything OK?
176
00:08:56,326 --> 00:08:59,446
Er, that was the, er,
London Royal Hospital.
177
00:09:00,726 --> 00:09:03,566
My mother died of a heart attack
at 11 o'clock this morning.
178
00:09:06,082 --> 00:09:07,602
Oh, Martin...
179
00:09:10,206 --> 00:09:11,486
I'm so sorry.
180
00:09:14,566 --> 00:09:16,486
I should tell Ruth, I suppose.
181
00:09:18,006 --> 00:09:19,846
After lunch, maybe.
182
00:09:23,046 --> 00:09:24,486
Come here.
183
00:09:31,246 --> 00:09:33,206
It's... I don't want the fish
to get dry.
184
00:09:39,166 --> 00:09:41,446
There goes the Grinch.
CHUCKLING
185
00:09:41,486 --> 00:09:43,246
- Thanks for ruining Christmas!
- Tosser!
186
00:09:43,286 --> 00:09:45,446
- Tosser!
- Tosser!
187
00:09:50,366 --> 00:09:51,966
KNOCK AT DOOR
188
00:09:56,006 --> 00:09:59,046
- Hello, Martin. Come in.
- Thank you.
189
00:09:59,086 --> 00:10:03,966
You'll have to forgive me.
I'm experimenting with eggnog.
190
00:10:06,046 --> 00:10:07,366
What is it?
191
00:10:07,924 --> 00:10:11,774
Er, my mother suffered a
heart attack this morning and died.
192
00:10:12,317 --> 00:10:14,219
Oh, dear.
193
00:10:14,646 --> 00:10:17,108
- I'm sorry to hear that.
- Mm.
194
00:10:17,486 --> 00:10:18,646
Erm...
195
00:10:18,926 --> 00:10:20,686
Oh, when will the funeral be?
196
00:10:20,726 --> 00:10:23,012
Sometime between Christmas
and the new year.
197
00:10:24,247 --> 00:10:26,929
May I ask how you're feeling?
198
00:10:27,737 --> 00:10:30,486
Erm, I'm-I'm fine.
We weren't very close.
199
00:10:30,526 --> 00:10:32,166
She was your mother.
200
00:10:32,206 --> 00:10:34,103
She stole my clock.
201
00:10:34,446 --> 00:10:36,686
Don't be too hard on yourself, Martin.
202
00:10:38,366 --> 00:10:41,006
Grief has a way
of stealing up on us all,
203
00:10:41,046 --> 00:10:43,046
even when we think we're free of it.
204
00:10:43,086 --> 00:10:45,286
Honestly, I'm fine.
205
00:10:45,326 --> 00:10:46,766
Poor Margaret.
206
00:10:48,197 --> 00:10:51,957
I always hoped that she'd become
the mother that you deserved, but...
207
00:10:53,627 --> 00:10:56,151
Oh, well, I won't speak ill of the dead.
208
00:10:58,044 --> 00:11:00,888
She was an awful woman
and a terrible mother.
209
00:11:01,126 --> 00:11:03,170
I thought
you weren't going to speak ill.
210
00:11:03,613 --> 00:11:05,286
I was being polite.
211
00:11:12,406 --> 00:11:13,486
'How much?'
212
00:11:14,886 --> 00:11:16,366
No, but seriously.
213
00:11:17,385 --> 00:11:19,625
Look, I know it's short notice, but...
214
00:11:20,806 --> 00:11:22,326
I'm gonna have to call you back.
215
00:11:24,366 --> 00:11:26,326
Hello, Louisa. What can I do for you?
216
00:11:26,366 --> 00:11:30,206
Joe, you've, er,
got a little something on your face.
217
00:11:30,261 --> 00:11:33,093
It's for, erm, undercover work.
218
00:11:33,757 --> 00:11:35,858
Well, I'm here because
I'd like to organise
219
00:11:35,883 --> 00:11:37,726
a lantern parade for tomorrow.
220
00:11:37,766 --> 00:11:40,366
A lantern parade?
Haven't had one of those for years.
221
00:11:40,406 --> 00:11:43,070
Unfortunately, from a police standpoint,
222
00:11:43,095 --> 00:11:44,575
tomorrow's just not possible.
223
00:11:44,615 --> 00:11:47,815
- Oh... Oh, that's a shame.
- Mm.
224
00:11:47,855 --> 00:11:51,138
Because I was gonna ask you
to be Santa and lead the parade.
225
00:11:51,163 --> 00:11:54,121
Well, when I say not possible,
I mean not...
226
00:11:54,723 --> 00:11:56,762
NOT possible.
227
00:11:56,985 --> 00:11:59,226
So it... it is possible?
228
00:11:59,227 --> 00:12:01,391
I'm here to help. What do we need?
229
00:12:01,392 --> 00:12:03,615
Well, we need lanterns. About 40 or 50.
230
00:12:03,655 --> 00:12:06,629
- No problem. I'll talk to Bert.
- Great. And can you spread the word?
231
00:12:06,630 --> 00:12:10,215
Just to confirm,
I shall be playing Santa Claus
232
00:12:10,255 --> 00:12:11,455
and leading the parade?
233
00:12:11,495 --> 00:12:13,817
- Yeah.
- Wonderful.
234
00:12:14,165 --> 00:12:18,076
You know, between you and me,
it's not really for undercover work.
235
00:12:19,661 --> 00:12:22,635
I know. I can see your costume
hanging up at the back.
236
00:12:22,735 --> 00:12:26,212
Ha, very good.
You should be a policeman.
237
00:12:26,213 --> 00:12:29,175
HUMMING A TUNE
238
00:12:39,855 --> 00:12:42,255
SHE GULPS
239
00:12:42,295 --> 00:12:45,175
GAGGING
240
00:12:47,107 --> 00:12:49,687
Mrs Tishell, I've come
to pick up my medical supplies
241
00:12:49,688 --> 00:12:51,285
for the holiday period.
242
00:12:52,543 --> 00:12:55,392
What are you doing? Mrs Tishell?
243
00:12:55,695 --> 00:12:57,206
You're choking.
244
00:12:57,207 --> 00:12:58,316
Turn round.
245
00:13:06,055 --> 00:13:09,456
- Got it?
- Oh... Oh...
246
00:13:09,496 --> 00:13:11,764
- Right, just let go.
- Oh, thank you, Doctor.
247
00:13:11,765 --> 00:13:13,495
Let go. Let go of my arms.
248
00:13:13,535 --> 00:13:15,958
HOARSELY: Oh, thank you, Doctor.
It went down the wrong way.
249
00:13:17,674 --> 00:13:19,640
You were choking before as well.
250
00:13:19,641 --> 00:13:22,615
Well, I-I-I do need
to take more care in future.
251
00:13:22,655 --> 00:13:23,997
Why is your voice hoarse?
252
00:13:23,998 --> 00:13:27,775
Cos I was singing carols yesterday.
You saved my life, Doctor.
253
00:13:27,815 --> 00:13:29,966
- Come here into the light.
- Oh...
254
00:13:32,397 --> 00:13:35,237
Mmm... Mm, mm, mm!
255
00:13:36,655 --> 00:13:37,895
No, no, no!
256
00:13:37,935 --> 00:13:40,163
- But the mistletoe...!
- No!
257
00:13:40,164 --> 00:13:42,028
No, I'll come and collect
my supplies later.
258
00:13:42,029 --> 00:13:44,055
I'm sorry, Doc! I-I had to.
259
00:13:44,095 --> 00:13:46,277
Cos this might be my last...
260
00:13:46,615 --> 00:13:48,382
my last Christmas.
261
00:13:52,165 --> 00:13:55,135
- There you go, John.
- Cheers, Bert. Merry Christmas.
262
00:13:56,118 --> 00:14:00,158
I know the doc has a job to do,
but so do I.
263
00:14:00,535 --> 00:14:03,895
And it's not fair, you know?
It's just not fair.
264
00:14:03,935 --> 00:14:06,375
Yes, we know.
You keep on saying, Leonard.
265
00:14:06,415 --> 00:14:10,015
- Sorry. Don't mean to go on about it.
- It's all right.
266
00:14:10,055 --> 00:14:12,655
If you can't go to your local
for a drink and a moan,
267
00:14:12,695 --> 00:14:15,655
where can you go?
It's good to see you in here again.
268
00:14:15,695 --> 00:14:16,962
It's been a while.
269
00:14:16,963 --> 00:14:19,398
It's the children I feel sorry for.
270
00:14:19,399 --> 00:14:21,870
It's a bit of magic in their lives.
271
00:14:22,335 --> 00:14:24,215
Takes me months to make these.
272
00:14:24,964 --> 00:14:27,084
I don't blame the doc.
273
00:14:27,735 --> 00:14:30,238
No, he's to be pitied.
274
00:14:30,455 --> 00:14:32,575
He just...
275
00:14:32,615 --> 00:14:34,512
He just doesn't get it.
276
00:14:34,895 --> 00:14:38,775
But don't worry, Santa isn't done yet.
277
00:14:38,815 --> 00:14:40,542
Oh!
278
00:14:40,775 --> 00:14:43,215
I think Santa's done for the day
at least.
279
00:14:43,255 --> 00:14:45,735
Best go home and sleep it off, eh?
280
00:14:45,775 --> 00:14:48,772
- This isn't like you.
- Do you need me to call you a taxi?
281
00:14:48,797 --> 00:14:50,622
No, it's OK.
282
00:14:50,867 --> 00:14:52,620
I've got a sleigh.
283
00:14:53,398 --> 00:14:55,964
- Sorry, she kissed you?
- Yeah.
284
00:14:56,311 --> 00:14:57,578
On the cheek or...?
285
00:14:57,579 --> 00:14:59,840
No, no, no. On the...
Smack on the mouth.
286
00:14:59,841 --> 00:15:02,594
- Maybe she was aiming for the cheek.
- No, she wasn't.
287
00:15:02,595 --> 00:15:03,877
It was quite shocking.
288
00:15:03,878 --> 00:15:06,575
And there was this peculiar
metallic tang,
289
00:15:06,615 --> 00:15:07,935
which didn't make it any better.
290
00:15:07,975 --> 00:15:09,908
I'm not sure I wanna know
all the details now, thank you.
291
00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:11,478
Oh, I don't blame you.
292
00:15:11,910 --> 00:15:15,535
- Did she say why she did it?
- Something about mistletoe.
293
00:15:15,575 --> 00:15:16,975
FOOTSTEPS APPROACH
294
00:15:17,015 --> 00:15:19,855
I've brushed my teeth
and I'm ready for bed.
295
00:15:19,895 --> 00:15:21,493
Oh, would you like me
to come and read to you?
296
00:15:21,494 --> 00:15:23,415
- No.
- It's the new one.
297
00:15:23,455 --> 00:15:24,935
I said NO.
298
00:15:24,975 --> 00:15:27,433
James, you don't raise your voice
to your father.
299
00:15:27,458 --> 00:15:28,781
LOW RUMBLING,
STONES CLATTERING
300
00:15:28,782 --> 00:15:31,081
- What is that?!
- Oh, my God!
301
00:15:31,082 --> 00:15:34,775
- THUDDING - It's coming from upstairs.
302
00:15:34,815 --> 00:15:37,335
- It's on the roof.
- It's Santa Claus!
303
00:15:37,375 --> 00:15:38,765
Don't be ridiculous.
304
00:15:38,766 --> 00:15:40,575
DOG BARKING
305
00:15:40,615 --> 00:15:42,947
Ho-ho-ho!
306
00:15:44,068 --> 00:15:46,316
What are you doing up there?!
307
00:15:46,385 --> 00:15:49,558
I'm showing you the magic of Christmas!
308
00:15:49,734 --> 00:15:51,561
Well, get down, right now.
309
00:15:51,562 --> 00:15:54,433
Ho-ho-ho-ho!
310
00:15:54,655 --> 00:15:58,015
What's going on? I saw the commotion
from The Platt. Wait, is that...?
311
00:15:58,055 --> 00:15:59,935
It's Santa Claus!
312
00:15:59,975 --> 00:16:01,716
Well, maybe to the untrained eye.
313
00:16:01,717 --> 00:16:03,503
You need to get up there
and get that man down.
314
00:16:03,504 --> 00:16:06,064
He is drunk, he's a danger
to himself and my property.
315
00:16:06,065 --> 00:16:09,575
- Follow me.
- Please don't hurt Santa.
316
00:16:10,585 --> 00:16:13,145
Ho-ho-ho-ho!
317
00:16:21,708 --> 00:16:23,502
All right, Leonard?
318
00:16:23,949 --> 00:16:25,804
That's not my name.
319
00:16:26,085 --> 00:16:27,959
All right... Santa?
320
00:16:28,196 --> 00:16:30,857
Why don't you just come over here
321
00:16:30,858 --> 00:16:33,495
- nice and slowly...?
- Is he coming?
322
00:16:33,535 --> 00:16:37,735
That man needs to learn
the true meaning of Christmas.
323
00:16:37,775 --> 00:16:40,455
Oh, he just wants to teach you
the true meaning of Christmas.
324
00:16:40,495 --> 00:16:42,807
No, get back up there, go and get him!
325
00:16:42,808 --> 00:16:46,175
OK, OK. Ah, ah...
326
00:16:50,699 --> 00:16:52,059
Ah...
327
00:16:52,099 --> 00:16:56,299
Well... unless
the true meaning of Christmas
328
00:16:56,339 --> 00:16:59,179
is that he's gonna
get his chimney blocked,
329
00:16:59,219 --> 00:17:00,877
I suggest...
330
00:17:01,419 --> 00:17:04,305
Oh, that's a big drop!
331
00:17:05,459 --> 00:17:09,117
It could... It could
make you feel a bit, a bit...
332
00:17:09,139 --> 00:17:11,517
Whoa!
PANTING
333
00:17:11,518 --> 00:17:13,739
Don't let go, Leonard!
334
00:17:13,779 --> 00:17:15,462
That's not my name!
335
00:17:15,503 --> 00:17:17,379
Santa! Don't let go, Santa!
336
00:17:17,419 --> 00:17:19,314
- I won't.
- HE GRUNTS
337
00:17:19,339 --> 00:17:20,741
Oh, God.
338
00:17:20,742 --> 00:17:23,862
- Oh, oh, oh...
- Argh...
339
00:17:23,968 --> 00:17:27,259
- Whoops.
- Oh, don't say whoops! Argh!
340
00:17:27,299 --> 00:17:29,092
Ah, ah, ah...
341
00:17:30,059 --> 00:17:32,419
Thanks, Doc. It wasn't me.
342
00:17:32,474 --> 00:17:36,299
It was just everything
started moving. I went dizzy.
343
00:17:36,324 --> 00:17:37,725
It's vertigo.
344
00:17:37,750 --> 00:17:40,299
And you're drunk and a disgrace.
Come down.
345
00:17:40,339 --> 00:17:42,179
Merry Christmas, Doc!
346
00:17:46,939 --> 00:17:49,539
- What on Earth were you thinking of?
- Sorry, Doc.
347
00:17:49,579 --> 00:17:52,659
I suppose I get a bit emotional
this time of the year.
348
00:17:52,699 --> 00:17:54,714
I had a few drinks.
349
00:17:55,019 --> 00:17:58,339
- Normally don't touch the stuff.
- A few drinks? You're drunk.
350
00:17:58,379 --> 00:17:59,779
It was only two.
351
00:17:59,819 --> 00:18:02,259
Really? Well, you must have
a very low tolerance for alcohol.
352
00:18:02,299 --> 00:18:03,859
I suggest you keep avoiding it.
353
00:18:03,899 --> 00:18:07,178
That was incredibly irresponsible.
The harm you could've done yourself
354
00:18:07,179 --> 00:18:09,499
or Penhale. Not to mention my family.
355
00:18:09,539 --> 00:18:11,379
Lucky I was there to save you.
356
00:18:11,419 --> 00:18:14,099
Right, come on, I'll drive you home.
357
00:18:16,739 --> 00:18:19,313
At least your son got to see Santa.
358
00:18:19,338 --> 00:18:21,379
Yes, if he'd been really lucky,
he'd have seen Santa
359
00:18:21,419 --> 00:18:23,259
fall off the roof and break his neck.
360
00:18:29,099 --> 00:18:30,179
James...
361
00:18:33,783 --> 00:18:34,983
HE SIGHS
362
00:18:53,381 --> 00:18:55,548
Look what Santa brought...
363
00:19:07,979 --> 00:19:09,419
Hello?
364
00:19:10,579 --> 00:19:11,579
Hello?
365
00:19:11,619 --> 00:19:18,099
DOG BARKS, GROWLS
366
00:19:18,139 --> 00:19:19,477
DOG BARKS
367
00:19:19,478 --> 00:19:21,265
No! Ow!
368
00:19:21,266 --> 00:19:23,259
Out, out, OUT!
369
00:19:23,299 --> 00:19:25,699
- Why is it in here?
- I wonder what's wrong.
370
00:19:25,754 --> 00:19:29,123
It's a dog. That's what's wrong.
It's always barking.
371
00:19:29,148 --> 00:19:31,059
No, it's-it's not always barking.
372
00:19:31,099 --> 00:19:32,943
And it's never at this time
in the morning.
373
00:19:34,787 --> 00:19:36,619
BARKING CONTINUES
374
00:19:36,659 --> 00:19:38,219
- Martin?
- Yes.
375
00:19:38,259 --> 00:19:40,957
- James has gone!
- What? Where?
376
00:19:40,982 --> 00:19:44,379
I don't know, he's left this note.
It says he's gone to the North Pole.
377
00:19:44,419 --> 00:19:48,179
Oh, James is a smart, sensible boy,
he wouldn't do that.
378
00:19:48,219 --> 00:19:50,419
He's not in his room and
you're literally holding a note
379
00:19:50,459 --> 00:19:52,718
- saying he's gone.
- All right, I'll get dressed
380
00:19:52,743 --> 00:19:53,643
and we'll go and find him.
381
00:19:53,668 --> 00:19:55,659
Yeah, maybe he's just
hiding in the house somewhere.
382
00:19:55,691 --> 00:19:58,651
James, James! Come on, hurry up. James!
383
00:19:59,546 --> 00:20:01,190
He's never done
anything like this before.
384
00:20:01,215 --> 00:20:02,899
I think it's cos
his head's been filled with
385
00:20:02,939 --> 00:20:04,659
all this Father Christmas stuff.
386
00:20:04,699 --> 00:20:08,024
Well, you're the one who practically
dragged Santa out the grotto,
387
00:20:08,049 --> 00:20:09,705
then shouted at him yesterday.
388
00:20:09,730 --> 00:20:11,659
Well, he was on our roof!
389
00:20:11,699 --> 00:20:13,539
But James doesn't get that. He just..
390
00:20:13,579 --> 00:20:17,000
- He just sees you ruining Christmas.
- I'm not ruining Christmas!
391
00:20:17,025 --> 00:20:19,499
Is it so bad that he might enjoy it?
392
00:20:19,539 --> 00:20:22,579
Even you must have some
happy memories of it as a child.
393
00:20:22,619 --> 00:20:24,350
No, I don't. MOBILE PHONE RINGS
394
00:20:24,351 --> 00:20:27,648
Well, isn't that a good reason
to make sure that James and Mary do?
395
00:20:28,139 --> 00:20:29,416
Ruth.
396
00:20:30,819 --> 00:20:31,925
Yes.
397
00:20:32,339 --> 00:20:33,779
We're on our way.
398
00:20:33,819 --> 00:20:35,539
She's got him.
She's giving him breakfast.
399
00:20:35,579 --> 00:20:38,299
Oh, thank goodness.
Right, but I'll pick him up.
400
00:20:38,339 --> 00:20:40,739
I'm sorry, Martin, it's just
that under the circumstances,
401
00:20:40,779 --> 00:20:42,989
I think it's better
that I go there alone.
402
00:20:43,579 --> 00:20:44,577
Right.
403
00:20:47,799 --> 00:20:49,919
DOG BARKS
404
00:20:51,139 --> 00:20:52,219
Shut up.
405
00:21:03,979 --> 00:21:07,179
Oh, good morning, Doc.
Oh, you're all wet.
406
00:21:07,574 --> 00:21:09,294
I want to talk about yesterday.
407
00:21:09,661 --> 00:21:12,278
Oh, s... Oh, I'm so sorry.
I'm very sorry.
408
00:21:12,279 --> 00:21:17,359
Erm, I know it was unprofessional
and that you're probably very angry.
409
00:21:17,803 --> 00:21:21,683
Unless you're not... and you want
to suggest that we elope together,
410
00:21:21,708 --> 00:21:24,519
- slipping away into the night...
- No. No. No!
411
00:21:25,526 --> 00:21:28,374
When you forced your mouth
against mine yesterday,
412
00:21:28,399 --> 00:21:30,279
I noticed a strong acidic taste.
413
00:21:30,319 --> 00:21:33,119
And yesterday I saw you choke twice,
on two different occasions.
414
00:21:33,159 --> 00:21:34,799
Also, your voice is very hoarse.
415
00:21:34,839 --> 00:21:36,834
Well that's cos I've been
singing carols.
416
00:21:36,859 --> 00:21:40,039
And I am sorry,
but I have to close for lunch.
417
00:21:40,079 --> 00:21:41,439
It's 8:15 in the morning.
418
00:21:42,314 --> 00:21:44,879
Well, I'm... I'm not ill, Doctor.
419
00:21:44,919 --> 00:21:47,119
Do you get a sensation
like there's a lump in your throat
420
00:21:47,159 --> 00:21:48,905
- when you swallow?
- No.
421
00:21:48,906 --> 00:21:52,739
No, because that would be
very worrying if I thought that...
422
00:21:54,079 --> 00:21:55,036
Yes.
423
00:21:55,488 --> 00:21:57,693
You can read me like a book, Doctor.
424
00:21:57,694 --> 00:21:59,938
Hmm. Let me take a look.
425
00:22:01,439 --> 00:22:02,999
Ah, oh...
426
00:22:06,632 --> 00:22:09,116
I first noticed it
a couple of weeks ago.
427
00:22:09,205 --> 00:22:11,519
And I feel something
every time I swallow.
428
00:22:11,559 --> 00:22:15,792
An enlarged lymph node.
I know what that means, Doctor.
429
00:22:15,793 --> 00:22:18,479
Stop talking. Open your mouth
and tilt your head back.
430
00:22:18,760 --> 00:22:20,160
Don't try to kiss me.
431
00:22:21,959 --> 00:22:23,105
- Ahh!
- Swallow.
432
00:22:23,106 --> 00:22:26,439
- SHE GULPS
- Yes. You have GORD.
433
00:22:26,440 --> 00:22:28,600
Gastroesophageal reflux disease.
434
00:22:28,601 --> 00:22:31,279
I'll prescribe Omeprazole,
but we should keep an eye on it.
435
00:22:31,319 --> 00:22:33,479
Chronic inflammation
of the oesophagus over time
436
00:22:33,519 --> 00:22:36,199
could lead to more serious
complications and damage.
437
00:22:36,951 --> 00:22:40,515
What, so, basically...
438
00:22:41,039 --> 00:22:42,519
heartburn?
439
00:22:42,567 --> 00:22:44,710
- Yes.
- I'm not dying?
440
00:22:44,735 --> 00:22:46,679
No, not yet. Hold still.
441
00:22:50,679 --> 00:22:52,959
Mm. Normal movement.
442
00:22:52,999 --> 00:22:54,999
Your prolapsed disc must have healed.
443
00:22:55,039 --> 00:22:56,839
You don't need to wear
the neck brace any more.
444
00:22:56,879 --> 00:22:59,599
Oh, I-I-I think
just to be on the safe side...
445
00:22:59,639 --> 00:23:01,559
There is no safe side.
You just don't need to.
446
00:23:01,599 --> 00:23:05,879
Maybe just pop it back on
for a few minutes. Not more, I-I...
447
00:23:05,919 --> 00:23:07,719
If you have an issue with taking it off,
448
00:23:07,759 --> 00:23:10,239
then I can refer you to
a clinical psychologist if you like.
449
00:23:11,271 --> 00:23:13,990
No. There's no need for that.
450
00:23:14,919 --> 00:23:16,799
Consider it gone.
451
00:23:17,925 --> 00:23:21,550
And thank you, Doctor, for your
infinite patience and understanding.
452
00:23:21,679 --> 00:23:22,799
Yes.
453
00:23:43,707 --> 00:23:45,357
Medical supplies, please.
454
00:23:45,826 --> 00:23:47,306
Yes, Doctor.
455
00:23:52,127 --> 00:23:53,367
Thank you.
456
00:23:58,879 --> 00:24:01,039
I was just coming back
from the newsagents
457
00:24:01,079 --> 00:24:03,239
and I saw him strolling down the street.
458
00:24:03,279 --> 00:24:05,639
I managed to persuade him
to have some breakfast
459
00:24:05,686 --> 00:24:09,086
before he continued his journey
to the North Pole.
460
00:24:09,119 --> 00:24:12,239
WEATHER REPORT ON TV:
'..freezing conditions, sub-zero.
461
00:24:12,279 --> 00:24:14,777
'And you can see there's
a strong band of low pressure...'
462
00:24:14,778 --> 00:24:17,427
What you did was very wrong, James.
463
00:24:17,630 --> 00:24:20,394
You can't just go walking off like that.
464
00:24:20,395 --> 00:24:22,919
Mummy and Daddy were very worried.
465
00:24:22,959 --> 00:24:26,151
'..with a good chance of some snow
on the higher ground.
466
00:24:26,176 --> 00:24:27,441
'And that's gonna give some of us
in Cornwall...'
467
00:24:27,519 --> 00:24:28,639
It says it might snow.
468
00:24:28,679 --> 00:24:29,601
'..a white Christmas...'
469
00:24:29,602 --> 00:24:31,919
You won't need to go to
the North Pole now, will you?
470
00:24:31,959 --> 00:24:34,479
Doesn't matter. I hate Christmas!
471
00:24:34,519 --> 00:24:36,079
He's just like his father.
472
00:24:36,119 --> 00:24:37,905
Well, no. No, he's not, Ruth.
473
00:24:37,906 --> 00:24:40,879
Because, actually, Daddy's very much
looking forward to seeing Santa
474
00:24:40,919 --> 00:24:42,359
at the parade tonight as well.
475
00:24:42,399 --> 00:24:43,639
Really?
476
00:24:43,679 --> 00:24:45,044
Of course.
477
00:24:45,045 --> 00:24:47,795
So, why don't you go and clean up
your bowl and we'll get on home?
478
00:24:55,719 --> 00:24:58,359
SONG: 'Twelve Days Of Christmas'
479
00:25:05,319 --> 00:25:07,239
SHE SCREAMS, CHICKENS CLUCK
480
00:25:07,279 --> 00:25:08,599
FLAPPING
481
00:25:08,639 --> 00:25:10,119
SHE WHIMPERS
482
00:25:16,433 --> 00:25:18,159
'Be honest, Doc, how bad is it?'
483
00:25:18,199 --> 00:25:21,100
- It's just a few minor scratches.
- Oh, God.
484
00:25:21,399 --> 00:25:23,559
I've probably caught
all kinds of horrible diseases.
485
00:25:23,599 --> 00:25:25,999
Diseases from birds are usually
spread by inhaling the dust
486
00:25:26,039 --> 00:25:27,039
from their droppings.
487
00:25:27,079 --> 00:25:29,874
Worst a scratch'll do is give you
a mild superficial infection.
488
00:25:29,899 --> 00:25:31,559
Did you just say super-infection?
489
00:25:31,599 --> 00:25:33,359
No, I said superficial infection.
490
00:25:33,399 --> 00:25:35,263
This is hardly the emergency
you said it was.
491
00:25:35,264 --> 00:25:37,443
Hello, hello, hell...! Oh.
492
00:25:37,444 --> 00:25:40,519
Oh, Doc, what are you doing here?
What's happened?
493
00:25:40,559 --> 00:25:43,079
Some psycho left birds in a box
to attack me.
494
00:25:43,119 --> 00:25:44,918
They didn't attack you.
They scratched you.
495
00:25:44,919 --> 00:25:46,014
The doc's right.
496
00:25:46,015 --> 00:25:49,039
Bit soon to be using
inflammatory language like psycho.
497
00:25:49,079 --> 00:25:52,319
Maybe someone
just wanted to give you a gift.
498
00:25:52,359 --> 00:25:55,359
What, a gift of three chickens?!
And then there's the note.
499
00:25:55,399 --> 00:25:58,439
"This is only the beginning."
That's a threat if ever I heard one.
500
00:25:58,479 --> 00:26:00,319
- Bye.
- Er, no. Wait up, Doc.
501
00:26:00,359 --> 00:26:03,639
Er, Louisa asked me to look after
the kids. I'll be safer there.
502
00:26:03,679 --> 00:26:05,039
Joe, deal with those.
503
00:26:05,079 --> 00:26:07,639
CHICKENS CLUCK
504
00:26:10,097 --> 00:26:13,654
- Oh. Good morning!
- Oh, hello, Agatha.
505
00:26:13,679 --> 00:26:16,959
I'm afraid the surgery isn't open
till after Christmas now.
506
00:26:16,999 --> 00:26:20,719
Oh, no, I've come to see you.
Official Parish Council business.
507
00:26:20,759 --> 00:26:22,759
Oh, right. OK.
508
00:26:22,799 --> 00:26:24,643
Of course. Erm...
509
00:26:24,644 --> 00:26:26,119
She does realise
510
00:26:26,159 --> 00:26:30,150
that that turkey is gonna end up
on someone's dinner table?
511
00:26:30,151 --> 00:26:33,639
- Yeah, course she does.
- Who's a good boy? Yeah, you are.
512
00:26:33,679 --> 00:26:35,954
You know, I've made
almost as much from selling
513
00:26:35,979 --> 00:26:37,379
guess-the-weight raffle tickets
514
00:26:37,419 --> 00:26:39,641
than I have had from selling food
these past few days.
515
00:26:39,642 --> 00:26:42,442
The great thing is, the chances
of someone actually guessing
516
00:26:42,482 --> 00:26:45,682
the weight of that bird
are close to zero. Oh, dear.
517
00:26:45,707 --> 00:26:48,867
It's a shame that Christmas comes
but once a year.
518
00:26:48,922 --> 00:26:51,042
- Here we go.
- Pop it over there.
519
00:26:51,777 --> 00:26:55,824
I got some battery lanterns,
candle ones,
520
00:26:56,042 --> 00:26:58,202
and some of those fancy sky ones.
521
00:26:58,242 --> 00:27:00,551
Here, were they expensive?
522
00:27:00,762 --> 00:27:03,562
It doesn't matter, Bert. It's Christmas.
523
00:27:03,602 --> 00:27:07,082
- We're not gonna charge for them.
- Oh, no, of course not.
524
00:27:08,602 --> 00:27:11,922
TURKEY CLUCKS, GOBBLES
525
00:27:11,962 --> 00:27:15,722
Sorry, Agatha, we had a little bit
of an incident here today.
526
00:27:15,762 --> 00:27:17,476
Oh.
SHE CHUCKLES
527
00:27:18,162 --> 00:27:20,682
- Would you like some tea?
- Oh, no, thank you.
528
00:27:20,722 --> 00:27:23,414
I understand you're planning
a lantern parade this evening?
529
00:27:23,439 --> 00:27:25,485
Yes. Well, it's a bit last-minute,
530
00:27:25,510 --> 00:27:27,768
but it's all coming together,
touch wood.
531
00:27:27,990 --> 00:27:31,270
CHUCKLING: How wonderful.
Although, you know the rules.
532
00:27:31,310 --> 00:27:34,110
You haven't lodged your event
notification form with the council
533
00:27:34,150 --> 00:27:37,246
60 days prior to the event
and had it ratified.
534
00:27:37,247 --> 00:27:41,419
No. I thought as it's just a few
people walking down the street...
535
00:27:41,551 --> 00:27:44,310
Oh... A few people
walking down the street...
536
00:27:44,350 --> 00:27:48,790
It's a bit like saying a rock
concert is a few people in a field.
537
00:27:51,315 --> 00:27:54,310
Agatha, James is really
looking forward to this.
538
00:27:54,350 --> 00:27:55,950
I know the village feels the same.
539
00:27:55,990 --> 00:27:59,384
And it really will just be
a few people with lanterns...
540
00:27:59,385 --> 00:28:00,843
Hi, guys.
541
00:28:01,606 --> 00:28:04,078
Martin, this is Agatha.
She's from the Parish Council.
542
00:28:04,079 --> 00:28:05,398
- Doctor Ellingham.
- Yes.
543
00:28:05,423 --> 00:28:07,445
Apologies if I look a little flustered.
544
00:28:07,446 --> 00:28:09,633
I've just been attacked by some birds.
545
00:28:09,634 --> 00:28:11,188
- Oh, my.
- It was nothing.
546
00:28:11,189 --> 00:28:13,604
Oh, sure! "Lose one eye, get another."
547
00:28:13,605 --> 00:28:15,343
That must have been horrible.
548
00:28:15,344 --> 00:28:17,697
Those awful things
with their mean, little beaks
549
00:28:17,698 --> 00:28:19,390
and lifeless, black eyes.
550
00:28:19,430 --> 00:28:22,110
- I know!
- Thankfully, Janice survived.
551
00:28:22,150 --> 00:28:24,950
I know she's really looking forward
to the parade as well.
552
00:28:24,990 --> 00:28:26,849
I'm not really that bothered...
553
00:28:26,874 --> 00:28:29,670
But, yes, very much so.
554
00:28:29,710 --> 00:28:32,150
Janice, can you check on Mary, please?
555
00:28:32,175 --> 00:28:33,140
Yes.
556
00:28:37,359 --> 00:28:40,870
Is there any way we can get the
event signed off by this evening?
557
00:28:41,520 --> 00:28:43,200
This isn't about paperwork.
558
00:28:43,225 --> 00:28:45,565
This is about the safety of the village
559
00:28:45,566 --> 00:28:48,630
during the most dangerous time
of the year.
560
00:28:48,670 --> 00:28:50,735
Well, I'm not sure
Christmas is that dangerous.
561
00:28:50,736 --> 00:28:51,950
Oh, really?
562
00:28:52,261 --> 00:28:55,950
Over-eating.
People drinking too much alcohol.
563
00:28:55,990 --> 00:28:57,642
Suppose there is
a little bit of that, yeah.
564
00:28:57,643 --> 00:28:59,643
Then there's injuries
from putting up decorations,
565
00:28:59,644 --> 00:29:03,525
injuries from taking them down,
candles, fires, indigestion,
566
00:29:03,946 --> 00:29:08,350
food poisoning, allergies, choking,
slipping on snow, slipping on ice...
567
00:29:08,390 --> 00:29:10,272
Have you ever seen
a Christmas tree catch alight?
568
00:29:10,273 --> 00:29:12,293
I don't know why people have them
in their homes.
569
00:29:12,294 --> 00:29:15,750
They're incendiary devices.
And don't forget batteries,
570
00:29:15,790 --> 00:29:17,510
which children seem to swallow
all day long
571
00:29:17,550 --> 00:29:18,830
during the Christmas holidays,
572
00:29:18,870 --> 00:29:20,510
leaking corrosive acid into the stomach
573
00:29:20,550 --> 00:29:22,347
and destroying its lining.
They're quite lethal.
574
00:29:22,348 --> 00:29:25,394
I did forget them! Thank you, doctor.
575
00:29:25,395 --> 00:29:27,607
Yes, thank you, Martin (!)
576
00:29:27,608 --> 00:29:30,508
You know, we've got a meeting now
about the parade.
577
00:29:30,509 --> 00:29:34,405
Why don't you come along and see
that there's nothing to worry about?
578
00:29:34,406 --> 00:29:36,734
- I suppose I could.
- Great.
579
00:29:36,988 --> 00:29:39,884
Martin, try and speak to James.
Make sure he's OK.
580
00:29:39,909 --> 00:29:40,846
Yes.
581
00:29:40,847 --> 00:29:43,790
- Come along, we should get going.
- Oh. Um...
582
00:29:43,830 --> 00:29:46,950
So, if nobody wins,
do we get to keep Toby?
583
00:29:46,990 --> 00:29:48,768
I don't know.
I hadn't really thought about it.
584
00:29:48,769 --> 00:29:50,839
Chances are
someone's guessed it correctly.
585
00:29:50,840 --> 00:29:53,038
Maybe. Maybe not.
586
00:29:53,924 --> 00:29:56,270
The plan is for people
to start at the school
587
00:29:56,310 --> 00:29:59,507
and make their way down here
to the Christmas tree at The Platt.
588
00:29:59,508 --> 00:30:02,430
- That's relatively straight-forward.
- Yeah, yeah, well, it is.
589
00:30:02,431 --> 00:30:05,110
- So, we all set, Louisa?
- Not quite.
590
00:30:05,150 --> 00:30:08,710
Apparently, we need permission
from Portwenn Parish Council.
591
00:30:08,750 --> 00:30:12,116
Erm, Agatha, you know Joe Penhale
and Bert Large, don't you?
592
00:30:12,141 --> 00:30:14,550
I am aware of them both, yes.
593
00:30:14,590 --> 00:30:17,790
What safety procedures
have you in play for the parade?
594
00:30:17,830 --> 00:30:23,656
Well... they're just walking
from up there to there, so...
595
00:30:23,657 --> 00:30:27,550
I thought I'd use the 1986
Public Order Act as my framework.
596
00:30:27,590 --> 00:30:30,984
Although, for me, the 1936 original
was far more effective.
597
00:30:30,985 --> 00:30:32,830
But then I'm just a police officer
598
00:30:32,870 --> 00:30:34,695
with the lowest crime rate
in Devon and Cornwall
599
00:30:34,696 --> 00:30:36,550
five years running, so what do I know?
600
00:30:36,590 --> 00:30:37,650
That's true.
601
00:30:38,030 --> 00:30:39,470
High-vis jackets?
602
00:30:39,510 --> 00:30:41,790
Please! I don't get out of bed
in the morning
603
00:30:41,830 --> 00:30:43,193
without a high-vis jacket on.
604
00:30:43,194 --> 00:30:45,030
LAUGHTER
605
00:30:45,070 --> 00:30:47,998
Have you got
a health and safety protocol?
606
00:30:47,999 --> 00:30:50,230
Er, no, not as such.
607
00:30:50,493 --> 00:30:53,585
But then, you know,
we-we only had a day and...
608
00:30:54,230 --> 00:30:56,030
- Well, so what?
- So what?!
609
00:30:56,070 --> 00:30:58,910
Yes. So what!
You know, the village needs this.
610
00:30:58,950 --> 00:31:02,302
To be able to come together
and celebrate as a community.
611
00:31:02,303 --> 00:31:04,791
The benefits surely outweigh the risks.
612
00:31:04,792 --> 00:31:07,526
Agatha, you're the only person
that can make it happen.
613
00:31:07,932 --> 00:31:09,285
Or not.
614
00:31:10,460 --> 00:31:13,110
I suppose it's only a short walk.
615
00:31:13,150 --> 00:31:15,203
Great. So we're OK for tonight?
616
00:31:15,204 --> 00:31:17,654
- TURKEY GOBBLES
- Is that a turkey?
617
00:31:17,655 --> 00:31:22,740
Er, excuse me, why have you got
livestock next to a food truck?
618
00:31:22,765 --> 00:31:24,005
It's unhygienic.
619
00:31:24,030 --> 00:31:27,830
He's called Toby and he's not
unhygienic, he's very clean.
620
00:31:27,870 --> 00:31:30,444
- I gave him a bath this morning.
- And we're just weighing him
621
00:31:30,469 --> 00:31:32,164
to see if anyone's won the competition.
622
00:31:32,165 --> 00:31:34,609
- What competition?
- Well, guess its weight correctly
623
00:31:34,610 --> 00:31:36,611
and it could end up on your table
this Christmas.
624
00:31:36,612 --> 00:31:38,560
Unfortunately, nobody got it right.
625
00:31:38,561 --> 00:31:40,585
Here, have a go. On the house.
626
00:31:40,586 --> 00:31:42,088
Oh, I don't know...
627
00:31:42,951 --> 00:31:44,825
Nine pounds, 11 ounces.
628
00:31:47,148 --> 00:31:49,590
That is amazing. How did you do that?
629
00:31:49,630 --> 00:31:51,164
Wait, I won?!
630
00:31:51,165 --> 00:31:53,671
I don't like birds,
and definitely not that one.
631
00:31:53,672 --> 00:31:55,259
He's not asking you to look after it.
632
00:31:55,260 --> 00:31:56,635
It's for Christmas lunch.
633
00:31:56,636 --> 00:31:58,032
Yeah, we'll get the butcher
to deliver it later.
634
00:31:58,033 --> 00:32:01,047
Or you could have the satisfaction
of knowing you were correct
635
00:32:01,048 --> 00:32:02,149
and leave it at that.
636
00:32:02,150 --> 00:32:06,097
Mor, it is a turkey, it's Christmas.
It's had a good, long life.
637
00:32:06,250 --> 00:32:09,499
Not that long. Christmas turkeys
are usually five months old.
638
00:32:09,500 --> 00:32:13,630
Well, we've all learned something
new today. So, the parade...
639
00:32:13,685 --> 00:32:16,255
So, the butcher will kill it
and chop it up for me?
640
00:32:16,256 --> 00:32:17,681
Yeah. All part of the prize.
641
00:32:17,682 --> 00:32:20,198
See what it's like
when a community comes together.
642
00:32:20,199 --> 00:32:21,391
AGATHA CHUCKLES
643
00:32:21,392 --> 00:32:23,488
He does seem like a healthy specimen.
644
00:32:23,760 --> 00:32:26,240
TURKEY GOBBLES
Oh, my! Oh!
645
00:32:33,865 --> 00:32:35,529
Mr Maitland, this is Doctor Ellingham.
646
00:32:35,530 --> 00:32:36,667
I have your test results.
647
00:32:36,668 --> 00:32:39,090
Can you please call me
as soon as you get this? Thank you.
648
00:32:39,091 --> 00:32:40,626
DOG BARKS James...
649
00:32:41,021 --> 00:32:43,102
Can you ask your dog to be quiet,
please?
650
00:32:43,103 --> 00:32:44,551
DOG WHIMPERS
651
00:32:44,552 --> 00:32:45,889
James?
652
00:32:49,571 --> 00:32:50,718
James?!
653
00:32:54,494 --> 00:32:55,407
DOG BARKS
654
00:32:55,432 --> 00:32:56,832
Downstairs, shoo!
655
00:32:59,315 --> 00:33:00,795
Hello, James.
656
00:33:03,349 --> 00:33:05,081
You're upset with me.
657
00:33:07,953 --> 00:33:09,073
Mmm.
658
00:33:14,959 --> 00:33:19,167
When I was your age,
I'd wake up on Christmas morning...
659
00:33:20,483 --> 00:33:23,717
..and at the end of my bed, every year,
660
00:33:24,001 --> 00:33:28,409
was a stocking with an orange
and a pencil set in it.
661
00:33:29,679 --> 00:33:32,287
And I'd run down to
my mother and father's room...
662
00:33:34,159 --> 00:33:35,302
..but...
663
00:33:36,300 --> 00:33:37,768
But what?
664
00:33:38,150 --> 00:33:40,130
MOBILE PHONE RINGS
665
00:33:40,131 --> 00:33:41,670
Excuse me.
666
00:33:42,502 --> 00:33:43,622
Yes.
667
00:33:45,087 --> 00:33:46,167
Right.
668
00:33:47,823 --> 00:33:48,765
Yes.
669
00:33:49,522 --> 00:33:51,990
Oh, I'm sorry, there's an emergency.
I have to go.
670
00:33:52,045 --> 00:33:53,820
Janice is downstairs
if you need anything.
671
00:33:53,821 --> 00:33:57,466
And we'll, erm...
Er, we'll talk again. Well done.
672
00:33:57,467 --> 00:33:59,550
Off, shoo, downstairs!
673
00:33:59,590 --> 00:34:01,823
DOG BARKS,
JAMES SIGHS
674
00:34:03,190 --> 00:34:06,070
OK, Agatha, I need you
to remain still, yeah?
675
00:34:06,110 --> 00:34:07,089
Just try not to move.
676
00:34:07,090 --> 00:34:08,369
SHOUTING: Out of the way,
coming through!
677
00:34:08,370 --> 00:34:11,486
You can probably hear somebody
barking at people. That's the doc.
678
00:34:11,930 --> 00:34:14,778
Er, she's had a fall. She's got
a cut on the back of her head.
679
00:34:14,779 --> 00:34:17,212
I've tried to stem the blood,
but I think she's concussed.
680
00:34:17,213 --> 00:34:18,813
Well done. Anybody called an ambulance?
681
00:34:18,853 --> 00:34:19,943
On its way, Doc.
682
00:34:20,253 --> 00:34:23,041
- Do you know where you are?
- Turkey.
683
00:34:23,066 --> 00:34:25,453
I think she means the bird, Doc,
not the country.
684
00:34:25,687 --> 00:34:27,452
I won it from the food truck.
685
00:34:27,477 --> 00:34:28,813
- Told you.
- Yes, shush.
686
00:34:29,313 --> 00:34:31,233
I never won anything before!
687
00:34:31,258 --> 00:34:32,698
Keep still and stop talking.
688
00:34:34,093 --> 00:34:38,483
Sorry, I hate to do this,
but do we have the Parish go-ahead
689
00:34:38,484 --> 00:34:39,521
for the parade?
690
00:34:39,522 --> 00:34:42,200
- Oh, Louisa, really? Not now, come on.
- Sorry.
691
00:34:42,795 --> 00:34:44,515
SHE MUTTERS
692
00:34:46,075 --> 00:34:47,262
What did that mean?
693
00:34:47,263 --> 00:34:49,062
I'm pretty sure it was a yes.
694
00:34:49,505 --> 00:34:52,030
You're just saying that
cos you wanna be Santa Claus.
695
00:34:52,031 --> 00:34:56,150
Yes, I am. Because you're right, Louisa.
696
00:34:56,151 --> 00:34:58,628
We deserve this. All of us.
697
00:34:59,104 --> 00:35:02,114
Do you really wanna tell James that
this has been cancelled as well?
698
00:35:02,592 --> 00:35:05,138
You're trying
to emotionally manipulate me.
699
00:35:05,163 --> 00:35:08,055
- Is it working?
- Might be, yeah.
700
00:35:08,080 --> 00:35:12,141
Because... technically,
Agatha didn't say no...
701
00:35:12,166 --> 00:35:14,634
- Everyone! The parade's still on.
- Joe, no, that's not what I meant...
702
00:35:14,674 --> 00:35:17,194
- Right, let's get to work. Come on!
- OK, then.
703
00:35:18,954 --> 00:35:21,594
Mor, what are you doing?
704
00:35:21,634 --> 00:35:24,154
Oh, I-I thought I'd drive him
to the butcher's myself.
705
00:35:24,194 --> 00:35:25,874
Well, I-I can do that.
706
00:35:25,914 --> 00:35:27,290
Yeah, erm...
707
00:35:27,634 --> 00:35:29,514
I know it's silly, but I...
708
00:35:29,554 --> 00:35:31,674
I just want a chance to say goodbye.
709
00:35:32,021 --> 00:35:34,298
What, to the...?
710
00:35:34,323 --> 00:35:36,194
Right, OK. I understand.
711
00:35:36,234 --> 00:35:39,194
But, I mean, it is a...
It's a turkey at Christmas.
712
00:35:39,234 --> 00:35:40,314
Yeah, I know.
713
00:35:40,354 --> 00:35:42,474
Just take it easy. Rest up.
714
00:35:42,514 --> 00:35:45,001
Erm, avoid the bumpy roads.
Keep it smooth.
715
00:35:45,026 --> 00:35:46,434
- MOBILE PHONE RINGS
- Yes, Doc.
716
00:35:46,474 --> 00:35:48,389
We know how to drive an ambulance.
717
00:35:49,601 --> 00:35:50,761
Ellingham.
718
00:35:50,801 --> 00:35:54,327
Doc, it's Leonard Maitland.
You left a message?
719
00:35:54,328 --> 00:35:57,025
Ah, Mr Maitland, yes.
Your test results have come back.
720
00:35:57,641 --> 00:35:59,533
It's bad news, isn't it?
721
00:36:00,266 --> 00:36:03,389
To be honest, I've been
having dizzy spells all day.
722
00:36:03,390 --> 00:36:05,946
It's made working in the garage
really tricky.
723
00:36:05,947 --> 00:36:08,303
If you're feeling dizzy,
you shouldn't be up and about.
724
00:36:08,335 --> 00:36:10,023
Yeah, all right...
725
00:36:11,473 --> 00:36:13,633
'I'll go and get a seat.'
726
00:36:17,361 --> 00:36:19,281
CLATTERING
727
00:36:19,321 --> 00:36:20,782
Oh, oh...
728
00:36:21,312 --> 00:36:23,202
Mr Maitland? What's happened?
729
00:36:23,601 --> 00:36:27,214
Just fell over and took
the shelf down with me and...
730
00:36:27,215 --> 00:36:28,587
Oh, no.
731
00:36:34,429 --> 00:36:36,496
Doc, I don't wanna panic here,
732
00:36:36,497 --> 00:36:39,339
but there's a massive cut in my leg
and a lot of blood.
733
00:36:42,681 --> 00:36:45,454
I'll just try and patch myself up.
734
00:36:45,539 --> 00:36:47,364
'Bleeding everywhere here.'
735
00:36:47,365 --> 00:36:49,893
Right, put pressure on the wound
and keep the leg raised.
736
00:36:49,894 --> 00:36:51,033
I'll call an ambulance.
737
00:36:51,034 --> 00:36:52,820
Er, I'm sure it'll be fine.
738
00:36:52,821 --> 00:36:55,295
'Er, no. Your blood test showed
that you're grossly anaemic.
739
00:36:55,296 --> 00:36:56,690
'You can't afford
to lose any more blood.'
740
00:36:56,691 --> 00:36:59,473
It's not like as I could
bleed to death, is it?
741
00:36:59,763 --> 00:37:03,130
Ah, well, in a worst-case scenario,
er, yes. In a few hours.
742
00:37:03,131 --> 00:37:04,769
Then can you please get off the phone
743
00:37:04,770 --> 00:37:06,193
and call me a bloody ambulance!
744
00:37:06,416 --> 00:37:07,502
Yes!
745
00:37:08,441 --> 00:37:10,586
TURKEY CLUCKS
746
00:37:10,587 --> 00:37:14,007
I don't want you to go,
but this is the only way.
747
00:37:16,360 --> 00:37:18,720
And I just wanna say thank you.
748
00:37:18,947 --> 00:37:21,222
I didn't think I was ready, but...
749
00:37:21,852 --> 00:37:24,227
I hadn't actually finished yet, Toby.
750
00:37:24,982 --> 00:37:27,347
It's fine.
TURKEY CHATTERS
751
00:37:28,604 --> 00:37:30,147
Bye, then.
752
00:37:30,187 --> 00:37:32,027
TURKEY GOBBLES
753
00:37:35,359 --> 00:37:37,690
- No, no fireworks.
- And no sky lanterns.
754
00:37:37,691 --> 00:37:40,507
Hang on a minute! I can get
a really good deal on those.
755
00:37:40,547 --> 00:37:43,153
We don't wanna take anyone's
attention away from the parade.
756
00:37:43,154 --> 00:37:45,787
- Louisa, excuse me.
- Martin, I'm in a meeting.
757
00:37:46,574 --> 00:37:47,959
Yes, forgive me.
758
00:37:48,821 --> 00:37:50,018
Sorry.
759
00:37:50,213 --> 00:37:52,111
There's been an accident
at Leonard Maitland's
760
00:37:52,112 --> 00:37:54,707
and the only ambulance in the area
is tied up with, erm...
761
00:37:54,747 --> 00:37:57,162
er, whatshername, so I'm gonna
have to drive up there myself.
762
00:37:57,163 --> 00:37:59,691
- Oh, dear, that sounds serious.
- Yes, it is.
763
00:37:59,987 --> 00:38:01,721
Will you be back in time for the parade?
764
00:38:01,722 --> 00:38:03,684
Erm, yes, I should be.
765
00:38:03,685 --> 00:38:06,187
Er, but if I'm not...
you'll tell James, will you?
766
00:38:06,227 --> 00:38:08,636
It'll be fine. He's fine. Just go.
767
00:38:25,627 --> 00:38:27,277
All OK with the butcher?
768
00:38:27,667 --> 00:38:30,547
You're not gonna believe me.
Toby escaped.
769
00:38:30,587 --> 00:38:31,747
What?
770
00:38:31,787 --> 00:38:34,947
Yeah, so I got to the butcher
and then he just sprung out the cage
771
00:38:34,987 --> 00:38:36,307
and flew away.
772
00:38:36,347 --> 00:38:38,443
You're right, I don't believe you.
773
00:38:38,444 --> 00:38:40,413
SCREAMING Is that Janice?
774
00:38:40,414 --> 00:38:41,787
God.
775
00:38:42,086 --> 00:38:43,563
Come on!
776
00:38:50,368 --> 00:38:51,565
What is it?
777
00:38:51,848 --> 00:38:54,008
Oh, that's really nice.
778
00:38:54,048 --> 00:38:55,168
Nice?
779
00:38:55,208 --> 00:38:57,368
Someone breaks in
and leaves more birds for me
780
00:38:57,408 --> 00:38:59,328
after the last lot almost blinded me?
781
00:38:59,368 --> 00:39:02,808
It was a tiny scratch. On your hand.
782
00:39:02,848 --> 00:39:05,008
Maybe you should speak to Joe.
783
00:39:05,048 --> 00:39:07,715
I already have. But you know
what the police are like.
784
00:39:07,740 --> 00:39:09,808
They've always got
more important things to do.
785
00:39:09,848 --> 00:39:13,088
It's just that doves are a symbol,
aren't they, of, er, of love?
786
00:39:13,128 --> 00:39:14,328
So?
787
00:39:14,368 --> 00:39:16,128
So maybe speak to Joe.
788
00:39:16,168 --> 00:39:19,168
Uh, I just told you, I already have.
789
00:39:19,208 --> 00:39:20,488
Is he feeling OK?
790
00:39:20,528 --> 00:39:22,008
SCREAMING
791
00:39:22,048 --> 00:39:24,208
PHONE RINGING OUT
792
00:39:27,956 --> 00:39:29,196
Mr Maitland?
793
00:39:31,448 --> 00:39:32,930
Can you hear me?
794
00:39:33,448 --> 00:39:35,008
Mr Maitland?
795
00:39:36,368 --> 00:39:39,288
If you can hear me, I'm almost with you.
796
00:39:39,328 --> 00:39:41,288
TURKEY CLUCKS
797
00:39:54,448 --> 00:39:57,208
TURKEY CHATTERS
798
00:40:02,808 --> 00:40:04,928
WIND WHISTLES
799
00:40:06,808 --> 00:40:08,808
HE GROANS
800
00:40:16,528 --> 00:40:18,168
HE MUTTERS
801
00:40:25,768 --> 00:40:28,848
RAGGED BREATHING,
WIND WHISTLES
802
00:40:28,888 --> 00:40:31,768
ENGINE HISSES
803
00:40:33,808 --> 00:40:35,528
HE GROANS
804
00:40:58,088 --> 00:40:59,608
HE YELPS
805
00:40:59,648 --> 00:41:01,768
Argh!
806
00:41:05,883 --> 00:41:08,607
I was just coming to find you.
How's your day been?
807
00:41:08,632 --> 00:41:10,014
- Terrible.
- Really?
808
00:41:10,039 --> 00:41:12,359
What, nothing special happened or...?
809
00:41:12,360 --> 00:41:15,249
Oh, something special happened.
That psycho struck again.
810
00:41:15,250 --> 00:41:17,291
He left two more scary birds
in the salon.
811
00:41:17,292 --> 00:41:20,017
OK. What type of birds?
812
00:41:20,018 --> 00:41:21,555
I don't know, doves or something.
813
00:41:21,556 --> 00:41:23,243
Well, doves are nice.
814
00:41:23,244 --> 00:41:26,666
Doves, pigeons, rats, bats -
they're all the same.
815
00:41:26,667 --> 00:41:28,708
When I find out who did this,
they're dead.
816
00:41:28,733 --> 00:41:31,070
Well, maybe if you just
think about it...
817
00:41:31,071 --> 00:41:34,004
I am thinking about it!
I can't stop, it's driving me nuts.
818
00:41:34,005 --> 00:41:36,986
Look, if you can't be bothered
to find out who's stalking me,
819
00:41:36,987 --> 00:41:38,405
then at least go and get rid of them!
820
00:41:38,406 --> 00:41:41,119
Yeah. I promise. I'll-I'll sort it out.
821
00:41:44,622 --> 00:41:48,693
Ho-ho-ho!
What do you want for Christmas?
822
00:41:48,965 --> 00:41:51,024
How far away
is Leonard Maitland's house?
823
00:41:51,025 --> 00:41:55,296
You do realise I'm Santa Claus,
not the wonderful Joseph Penh...
824
00:41:55,336 --> 00:41:56,542
It's about 20 minutes.
825
00:41:56,543 --> 00:41:58,499
It's just Martin drove up there
a few hours ago.
826
00:41:58,500 --> 00:42:00,294
He's still not back
and I can't get a hold of him.
827
00:42:00,295 --> 00:42:03,141
Well, signal's terrible up there.
The important thing...
828
00:42:03,142 --> 00:42:05,336
Is not to worry. Yes, I know.
829
00:42:05,376 --> 00:42:07,868
The important thing
is that Leonard can't play Santa
830
00:42:07,869 --> 00:42:09,306
because that's my job now.
831
00:42:09,307 --> 00:42:12,198
And, yes, also not to worry.
832
00:42:12,640 --> 00:42:17,256
TURKEY CHATTERS,
WIND WHISTLES
833
00:43:06,336 --> 00:43:11,056
ENGINE SPLUTTERS
THEN CUTS OUT
834
00:43:13,337 --> 00:43:14,863
RAGGED BREATHING
835
00:43:14,864 --> 00:43:17,313
You always were a fragile child.
836
00:43:18,555 --> 00:43:21,936
I'm not one to be critical,
but it was rather embarrassing.
837
00:43:22,964 --> 00:43:24,396
SHAKILY: Hypothermia.
838
00:43:24,397 --> 00:43:25,685
Hmm?
839
00:43:27,805 --> 00:43:30,379
Oh, I've been out in the cold
for nearly two hours
840
00:43:30,380 --> 00:43:32,613
and my body temperature's dropped.
841
00:43:32,614 --> 00:43:34,496
And my pulse rate's decreased.
842
00:43:34,536 --> 00:43:36,578
And my pupils are dilated.
843
00:43:37,208 --> 00:43:39,855
My reflexes seem unaffected, though.
844
00:43:39,856 --> 00:43:41,526
Oh, for goodness' sake.
845
00:43:41,908 --> 00:43:43,936
Can't you even say hello?
846
00:43:43,976 --> 00:43:47,099
Erm.. You're not a person.
You're a symptom.
847
00:43:47,100 --> 00:43:48,219
SHE SCOFFS
848
00:43:48,220 --> 00:43:50,199
That's a dreadful thing to say
to your mother.
849
00:43:50,200 --> 00:43:54,328
Hypothermia can lead to
disorientation and hallucinations.
850
00:43:55,079 --> 00:43:58,830
You always have an excuse for
everything. It's rather tiresome.
851
00:43:58,831 --> 00:44:03,176
Right now, my primary concern
is to get the engine started
852
00:44:03,216 --> 00:44:04,914
and the heat on again.
853
00:44:05,226 --> 00:44:07,364
And if you don't manage that?
854
00:44:07,365 --> 00:44:11,335
My core temperature
could drop to a level
855
00:44:11,336 --> 00:44:14,010
where it's unable
to produce sufficient heat,
856
00:44:14,487 --> 00:44:19,677
which ultimately would lead to
my vital organs failing and then...
857
00:44:20,416 --> 00:44:21,576
Death?
858
00:44:22,862 --> 00:44:23,862
Yes.
859
00:44:23,887 --> 00:44:25,847
How long do you have?
860
00:44:26,841 --> 00:44:28,601
About an hour.
861
00:44:29,971 --> 00:44:31,291
Maybe less.
862
00:44:32,531 --> 00:44:33,731
That's not helpful.
863
00:44:33,771 --> 00:44:37,940
Oh, Martin! What makes you think
I'm here to help?
864
00:44:37,965 --> 00:44:39,765
WIND WHISTLES
865
00:44:47,168 --> 00:44:50,328
Do you think he'll be upset
if you don't make it home?
866
00:44:50,543 --> 00:44:51,688
Who?
867
00:44:52,037 --> 00:44:53,368
James.
868
00:44:53,408 --> 00:44:55,328
I will make it back.
869
00:44:55,503 --> 00:44:58,460
You don't seem that upset
about my passing.
870
00:44:58,485 --> 00:45:01,288
And it's not as if you're
a better parent to James.
871
00:45:01,328 --> 00:45:02,649
That's not true.
872
00:45:02,650 --> 00:45:05,819
He's already begun to resent you,
Martin.
873
00:45:06,368 --> 00:45:08,488
That's a disease that spreads.
874
00:45:08,528 --> 00:45:11,627
One that I doubt
even you know how to cure.
875
00:45:13,582 --> 00:45:16,951
How old were you when you realised
we didn't love you?
876
00:45:18,357 --> 00:45:20,328
Look what Santa brought.
877
00:45:20,368 --> 00:45:23,510
'Was it on one of those
Christmas Day mornings,
878
00:45:23,535 --> 00:45:25,922
'when you woke up and found us gone?
879
00:45:27,676 --> 00:45:29,903
'You can't blame us, Martin.
880
00:45:31,048 --> 00:45:33,926
'We were happy before you arrived.'
881
00:45:34,448 --> 00:45:35,728
Hello?
882
00:45:38,048 --> 00:45:41,237
We just wanted to enjoy
one special day a year,
883
00:45:41,262 --> 00:45:43,608
when we could be free from you.
884
00:45:43,648 --> 00:45:46,128
Be quiet. You're not real.
885
00:45:46,168 --> 00:45:49,727
Which, on the balance of things,
is even more disturbing, isn't it?
886
00:45:49,752 --> 00:45:51,608
ENGINE STARTS
887
00:45:53,048 --> 00:45:54,848
What a clever boy.
888
00:45:54,888 --> 00:45:56,450
CAR BEEPS,
ENGINE STOPS
889
00:45:57,648 --> 00:45:59,074
Well, maybe not.
890
00:46:01,213 --> 00:46:03,004
What are you doing?
891
00:46:03,005 --> 00:46:07,088
My patient is anaemic.
I have to make sure that he's safe.
892
00:46:07,128 --> 00:46:10,408
You can't go out there.
You've already tried and failed.
893
00:46:10,448 --> 00:46:11,482
Then I'll try again.
894
00:46:11,483 --> 00:46:13,149
And you'll freeze to death.
895
00:46:13,488 --> 00:46:17,288
Now, sit back here
and listen with Mother.
896
00:46:17,328 --> 00:46:20,768
Just for the record... I forgive you.
897
00:46:21,068 --> 00:46:23,484
- No, you don't.
- Oh, shut up!
898
00:46:39,568 --> 00:46:41,288
You ready to go to the parade?
899
00:46:41,328 --> 00:46:43,008
Just fixing my beard.
900
00:46:43,048 --> 00:46:44,488
HE CHUCKLES
901
00:46:46,048 --> 00:46:47,269
Do I look OK?
902
00:46:47,270 --> 00:46:49,488
I don't know. I suppose so.
903
00:46:49,700 --> 00:46:52,168
I'm sorry.
It's this whole stalker thing.
904
00:46:52,208 --> 00:46:53,528
It's got me all anxious.
905
00:46:53,568 --> 00:46:55,928
It's over, Janice.
906
00:46:55,968 --> 00:46:57,688
You just have to trust me.
907
00:46:57,952 --> 00:46:59,328
It's all over.
908
00:47:02,535 --> 00:47:05,435
Right, I couldn't get you a partridge.
909
00:47:05,436 --> 00:47:08,889
What I have got you is a pheasant,
which is basically
910
00:47:08,914 --> 00:47:11,040
the Rolls Royce of partridges.
911
00:47:12,021 --> 00:47:13,248
Did you not get my message?
912
00:47:13,288 --> 00:47:16,888
Yeah. No more birds to the salon.
So I've, er, brought it here.
913
00:47:16,928 --> 00:47:18,568
Just "no more birds".
914
00:47:18,608 --> 00:47:21,447
Well, you've paid for them and
you're not getting your money back.
915
00:47:24,488 --> 00:47:25,940
Oh, my God.
916
00:47:26,328 --> 00:47:28,114
You're my stalker.
917
00:47:29,408 --> 00:47:32,288
What's wrong with you? Why would you
want to torture me like this?
918
00:47:32,328 --> 00:47:34,088
It was meant to be romantic.
919
00:47:34,128 --> 00:47:36,448
What's romantic about
being attacked by chickens?
920
00:47:36,488 --> 00:47:38,288
Not chickens. Hens.
921
00:47:38,328 --> 00:47:42,968
Three Cornish hens
because no-one had any French ones.
922
00:47:43,008 --> 00:47:46,168
And then two doves and then a pheasant.
923
00:47:46,208 --> 00:47:49,728
Because, apparently, they're
the Rolls Royce of partridges.
924
00:47:50,961 --> 00:47:53,601
You know, like the song.
925
00:47:54,688 --> 00:47:57,290
Well, then, why didn't you just
tell me, then?
926
00:47:58,168 --> 00:48:01,018
Because you were upset and...
927
00:48:02,341 --> 00:48:05,502
..I didn't want to spoil this...
928
00:48:07,076 --> 00:48:08,568
..this moment.
929
00:48:11,608 --> 00:48:12,864
Oh.
930
00:48:13,608 --> 00:48:18,394
I know we've tried and failed
before, Janice, but...
931
00:48:20,264 --> 00:48:21,608
..I love you.
932
00:48:25,267 --> 00:48:26,907
Joe, I can't.
933
00:48:28,968 --> 00:48:30,648
Oh. OK.
934
00:48:30,969 --> 00:48:33,569
OK. That's fine.
935
00:48:33,969 --> 00:48:36,968
I mean the beard. It has to go.
936
00:48:40,528 --> 00:48:42,008
So...?
937
00:48:42,048 --> 00:48:43,208
Yes!
938
00:48:48,488 --> 00:48:50,608
MOBILE PHONE RINGS
939
00:48:52,208 --> 00:48:53,568
Hello?
940
00:48:53,784 --> 00:48:56,059
Martin, thank goodness.
I was so worried.
941
00:48:56,288 --> 00:48:57,960
BREATHLESSLY: 'I crashed the car.'
942
00:48:58,288 --> 00:48:59,608
Oh, my God. Are you OK?
943
00:48:59,648 --> 00:49:01,308
Er, wait a minute.
944
00:49:01,648 --> 00:49:04,115
- Hello?
- 'I'm here, Martin.'
945
00:49:04,408 --> 00:49:06,648
I think I have hypothermia.
946
00:49:06,688 --> 00:49:08,488
My, er... my mother...
947
00:49:08,528 --> 00:49:10,768
Oh, Martin, I know. I'm so sorry.
948
00:49:11,058 --> 00:49:12,818
No, she came to visit me.
949
00:49:13,763 --> 00:49:15,683
What? What do you mean?
Like, as a ghost?
950
00:49:15,848 --> 00:49:18,666
No, it was a symptom of hypothermia.
951
00:49:19,408 --> 00:49:20,808
She said...
952
00:49:20,848 --> 00:49:22,968
She said I was losing James.
953
00:49:23,008 --> 00:49:24,608
She wasn't real, though.
954
00:49:24,663 --> 00:49:28,903
I know. But it doesn't mean
she wasn't right, though, does it?
955
00:49:28,928 --> 00:49:30,328
Martin, where are you now?
956
00:49:31,553 --> 00:49:34,878
Well, the car wouldn't start
and my mother was being annoying,
957
00:49:35,048 --> 00:49:37,008
so I was trying to find
Leonard Maitland's house,
958
00:49:37,048 --> 00:49:38,408
but I think I'm lost.
959
00:49:38,448 --> 00:49:42,288
OK. You need to go back to the car,
yeah, and I'll come and find you.
960
00:49:42,328 --> 00:49:44,448
I'm not entirely sure where I am...
961
00:49:44,488 --> 00:49:46,924
and I-I don't know where the car is.
962
00:49:48,543 --> 00:49:51,808
'Martin? Martin, I can't hear you.'
963
00:49:52,247 --> 00:49:53,648
I can see light.
964
00:49:53,688 --> 00:49:57,208
No, no, no, that doesn't sound good.
Don't go into the light, Martin.
965
00:49:57,538 --> 00:49:59,448
I think it's Leonard Maitland's house.
966
00:49:59,488 --> 00:50:01,888
All right, in that case,
definitely go towards it
967
00:50:01,928 --> 00:50:03,568
and I'll come collect you now.
968
00:50:03,608 --> 00:50:05,768
No. He needs urgent medical attention.
969
00:50:05,808 --> 00:50:07,088
That's why I'm here.
970
00:50:07,128 --> 00:50:09,928
Martin, you were just in a crash
and you said you had hypothermia.
971
00:50:09,968 --> 00:50:11,905
I just need to warm up.
972
00:50:12,248 --> 00:50:13,648
I'll be fine.
973
00:50:13,841 --> 00:50:15,448
Really, you're sure?
974
00:50:15,488 --> 00:50:18,408
Yeah. You can come and get me
after the parade.
975
00:50:18,448 --> 00:50:20,573
'Right, just, please,
just stay in touch.'
976
00:50:20,968 --> 00:50:22,808
DISCONNECTED TONE
977
00:50:40,888 --> 00:50:42,328
Hold on!
978
00:50:46,128 --> 00:50:48,688
Bloody hell, what happened to you?
Come in.
979
00:50:48,728 --> 00:50:50,888
You shouldn't be walking around.
980
00:50:50,928 --> 00:50:53,279
I had to answer the door, didn't I?
981
00:50:57,768 --> 00:50:59,879
Lie down there and elevate your leg.
982
00:51:06,338 --> 00:51:07,928
You look awful, Doc.
983
00:51:09,408 --> 00:51:11,346
My car came off the road.
984
00:51:11,648 --> 00:51:13,779
I just need to warm up for a bit.
985
00:51:14,517 --> 00:51:16,796
I would make you a hot drink, but...
986
00:51:17,168 --> 00:51:18,928
feel free to help yourself.
987
00:51:18,968 --> 00:51:20,408
Thank you.
988
00:51:21,911 --> 00:51:24,511
I'm a bit worried about
your blood loss, though.
989
00:51:24,848 --> 00:51:26,733
Let me take your pulse.
990
00:51:30,848 --> 00:51:33,181
Yeah, you don't have a radial pulse.
991
00:51:33,552 --> 00:51:35,968
I'll set up a drip
and get some fluids into you,
992
00:51:36,008 --> 00:51:37,988
but first
I'll have a look at that wound.
993
00:51:38,841 --> 00:51:41,208
Sorry to drag you up here, Doc.
994
00:51:41,248 --> 00:51:44,608
It's Christmas Eve.
You should be with your family.
995
00:51:44,648 --> 00:51:45,928
Stop talking.
996
00:51:50,328 --> 00:51:52,088
HE RETCHES
997
00:51:52,747 --> 00:51:54,439
It's bad, right?
998
00:51:55,057 --> 00:51:58,220
Yes, you've, er, torn a varicose vein.
999
00:51:58,248 --> 00:52:00,182
That's why you're bleeding so much.
1000
00:52:01,768 --> 00:52:03,128
HE GASPS
1001
00:52:04,980 --> 00:52:08,025
Well, yeah, luckily, he's OK,
but it could've been a lot worse.
1002
00:52:08,436 --> 00:52:10,160
Well, that's a relief.
1003
00:52:10,848 --> 00:52:13,808
And don't worry about Mary.
I'm more than happy
1004
00:52:13,848 --> 00:52:16,128
to look after her
while you're at the parade.
1005
00:52:16,168 --> 00:52:17,568
Oh, that's wonderful.
1006
00:52:18,362 --> 00:52:20,928
Oh, hello.
I didn't realise you were here.
1007
00:52:20,953 --> 00:52:22,914
Sal dropped in for some of my eggnog.
1008
00:52:22,939 --> 00:52:26,168
- I don't know if the doctor told you?
- He did.
1009
00:52:26,208 --> 00:52:27,269
Oh.
1010
00:52:27,848 --> 00:52:29,488
Sorry.
1011
00:52:29,528 --> 00:52:31,367
Why, what happened?
1012
00:52:31,368 --> 00:52:34,048
Oh, it's nothing. Thank you, Ruth.
1013
00:52:34,088 --> 00:52:36,048
Come on, James. It's almost time.
1014
00:52:36,088 --> 00:52:38,248
I'm going to see Santa.
1015
00:52:38,288 --> 00:52:40,524
Well, tell him I said hello.
1016
00:52:41,294 --> 00:52:42,382
Bye.
1017
00:52:46,509 --> 00:52:48,289
I don't want to pry...
1018
00:52:48,314 --> 00:52:51,608
I may have accidentally tried
to kiss the doctor earlier.
1019
00:52:51,648 --> 00:52:53,288
Oh, Sally.
1020
00:52:53,328 --> 00:52:55,288
Well, there was mistletoe.
1021
00:52:55,328 --> 00:52:56,968
And he'd just helped me.
1022
00:52:57,008 --> 00:53:01,408
I had what I thought was
a malignant lump in my throat
1023
00:53:01,448 --> 00:53:06,368
and it turned out to be
gastroesophageal reflux disease.
1024
00:53:06,408 --> 00:53:10,288
Well, usually, a handshake
or "thank you very much" will do.
1025
00:53:10,328 --> 00:53:12,008
And he also...
1026
00:53:12,048 --> 00:53:14,568
He said that my prolapsed disc
was healed
1027
00:53:14,608 --> 00:53:17,328
and I don't need to wear
my neck brace any more.
1028
00:53:17,368 --> 00:53:19,608
But I don't know. I just...
1029
00:53:19,648 --> 00:53:21,838
I can't seem to take it off.
1030
00:53:22,595 --> 00:53:24,608
Would you like me to do it?
1031
00:53:31,408 --> 00:53:32,448
Sorry.
1032
00:53:32,488 --> 00:53:34,008
Oh, er...
1033
00:53:34,048 --> 00:53:36,168
Oh-oh-oh, sorry...
1034
00:53:36,208 --> 00:53:39,128
I-I know it's stupid
and it's sentimental,
1035
00:53:39,168 --> 00:53:40,712
but, erm...
1036
00:53:42,688 --> 00:53:44,104
..I will miss it.
1037
00:53:45,658 --> 00:53:48,808
It's a permanent symbol
of a medical condition,
1038
00:53:49,012 --> 00:53:53,574
which means it's also
a permanent link to a certain doctor
1039
00:53:53,599 --> 00:53:55,407
you may have feelings for.
1040
00:53:56,568 --> 00:53:58,768
It's not the neck brace
you're giving up...
1041
00:54:00,168 --> 00:54:01,856
..it's Martin.
1042
00:54:13,728 --> 00:54:14,728
Do it.
1043
00:54:16,648 --> 00:54:18,588
- Good girl.
- Yeah.
1044
00:54:18,928 --> 00:54:21,488
- I, no-no...
- Stay still.
1045
00:54:21,528 --> 00:54:23,688
- I-I-I... Oh, oh...
- There.
1046
00:54:41,733 --> 00:54:45,853
You're right, it's time.
1047
00:54:48,027 --> 00:54:49,507
Yeah.
1048
00:54:56,808 --> 00:54:58,648
So, you need to rest up.
1049
00:54:58,688 --> 00:55:02,688
No strenuous activity
for at least two weeks.
1050
00:55:02,868 --> 00:55:05,188
- No more Santa, then.
- No.
1051
00:55:07,048 --> 00:55:09,648
Have you worked out
what this rash is yet?
1052
00:55:09,688 --> 00:55:12,128
Er, no, I haven't had
the results back from your biopsy,
1053
00:55:12,168 --> 00:55:15,388
but I'm fairly certain
that it's dermatitis herpetiformis.
1054
00:55:15,413 --> 00:55:18,048
Is it catching? No.
1055
00:55:18,299 --> 00:55:20,743
So there was no need
to close the grotto down.
1056
00:55:20,768 --> 00:55:22,928
No, no, precautions were necessary.
1057
00:55:22,968 --> 00:55:25,688
Anyway, I think it was just
a symptom of something bigger.
1058
00:55:25,728 --> 00:55:29,354
All indicators point towards
coeliac disease,
1059
00:55:29,379 --> 00:55:31,893
which is a condition
where your immune system
1060
00:55:31,918 --> 00:55:35,118
starts to attack your own tissue
when you eat gluten.
1061
00:55:35,158 --> 00:55:39,158
It would certainly explain
your low blood iron
1062
00:55:39,198 --> 00:55:41,235
and your stomach issues
and your weight loss.
1063
00:55:41,236 --> 00:55:44,524
And your stronger than normal
reaction to wheat-based alcohol.
1064
00:55:44,525 --> 00:55:47,692
My body's attacking itself?
Bloody heck, that sounds serious.
1065
00:55:47,693 --> 00:55:50,391
Yeah, it is. Yeah. Yeah.
Unless you change your diet,
1066
00:55:50,392 --> 00:55:52,992
you run the risk of malabsorption
and malnutrition.
1067
00:55:52,993 --> 00:55:55,678
It can be very serious.
I'll run some tests.
1068
00:55:55,718 --> 00:55:57,158
Urgent tests?
1069
00:55:57,198 --> 00:55:58,758
Not this minute, no.
1070
00:55:58,798 --> 00:56:01,558
Great, so I can drive you
back to the village now,
1071
00:56:01,598 --> 00:56:02,914
seeing as I'm not contagious.
1072
00:56:02,915 --> 00:56:04,210
Ah, no, that won't be necessary.
1073
00:56:04,211 --> 00:56:06,233
Louisa's coming to collect me
after the parade.
1074
00:56:06,234 --> 00:56:07,824
After the parade?
1075
00:56:07,985 --> 00:56:10,146
Doc, it's Christmas Eve.
1076
00:56:10,838 --> 00:56:13,294
I'm more than grateful,
you risking yourself,
1077
00:56:13,295 --> 00:56:16,411
coming up here and stitching me up,
but you should be with your family.
1078
00:56:16,412 --> 00:56:18,958
Yes, now I appreciate that,
but I need to be thorough.
1079
00:56:21,425 --> 00:56:22,669
Doc...
1080
00:56:22,952 --> 00:56:25,402
I hate Christmas. I always have.
1081
00:56:25,819 --> 00:56:27,268
What do you mean?
1082
00:56:27,468 --> 00:56:29,426
See, my wife loved it.
1083
00:56:29,708 --> 00:56:32,028
I was only ever Santa to please her.
1084
00:56:32,299 --> 00:56:34,639
And to be honest,
I still couldn't stand it.
1085
00:56:34,988 --> 00:56:38,231
I'd moan, complain, you know how it is.
1086
00:56:39,322 --> 00:56:44,470
Then, five years ago, she died.
December the 23rd, without warning.
1087
00:56:45,563 --> 00:56:47,717
Yes, I remember, it was very sad.
1088
00:56:47,868 --> 00:56:51,048
After that,
putting on the beard, the suit,
1089
00:56:51,049 --> 00:56:54,325
becoming someone else for a while,
well, it was an escape.
1090
00:56:57,188 --> 00:57:00,836
And once I stopped fighting it,
I started to get it.
1091
00:57:01,571 --> 00:57:05,331
Making toys for the kids,
giving folk some happy memories...
1092
00:57:05,356 --> 00:57:09,110
it's... it's a privilege, Doc.
An honour.
1093
00:57:09,708 --> 00:57:13,188
I just wish I'd understood that
when she was still alive.
1094
00:57:15,468 --> 00:57:19,508
Yes, well, erm... I'm sorry, you'll
have to wait until next year now.
1095
00:57:20,074 --> 00:57:22,148
And is that your plan?
1096
00:57:22,329 --> 00:57:23,908
Wait until next year
1097
00:57:23,948 --> 00:57:26,708
and MAYBE celebrate Christmas
with your family then?
1098
00:57:26,748 --> 00:57:28,868
I had an emergency to attend to.
1099
00:57:28,908 --> 00:57:30,468
And now the emergency's over.
1100
00:57:30,508 --> 00:57:31,828
Er, yeah, well, even if I...
1101
00:57:31,868 --> 00:57:34,548
Even if I... I mean, it's just...
It'll be just too late now.
1102
00:57:34,588 --> 00:57:36,388
It wouldn't be too late
if you left right now.
1103
00:57:36,428 --> 00:57:38,428
I still have to run those tests on you.
1104
00:57:38,468 --> 00:57:39,999
The tests can wait.
1105
00:57:42,724 --> 00:57:44,268
You're avoiding your family
1106
00:57:44,308 --> 00:57:46,828
because you don't want
to ruin things for them.
1107
00:57:50,508 --> 00:57:53,343
Do you wanna know what
the true magic of Christmas is?
1108
00:57:53,595 --> 00:57:55,702
It's being exactly who you are,
1109
00:57:55,736 --> 00:57:57,588
but, still, your family want you around,
1110
00:57:57,628 --> 00:57:59,988
even if you are an irritating bugger.
1111
00:58:01,359 --> 00:58:03,387
That truly is a miracle.
1112
00:58:04,697 --> 00:58:08,148
And sometimes we don't know how
lucky we are until it's too late.
1113
00:58:11,925 --> 00:58:15,636
The only way you can ruin their
Christmas is by not being there.
1114
00:58:17,948 --> 00:58:20,285
Yes, I see what you mean.
1115
00:58:20,788 --> 00:58:23,440
Great. Now,
it's gonna be cold out there,
1116
00:58:23,465 --> 00:58:24,816
so we'll need to wrap up.
1117
00:58:24,841 --> 00:58:27,108
You're not coming. You need
to recuperate and rest that leg.
1118
00:58:27,148 --> 00:58:29,308
Doc, it's Christmas Eve. I have plans.
1119
00:58:29,348 --> 00:58:31,908
- Absolutely not.
- I'm the one with the wheels.
1120
00:58:31,948 --> 00:58:35,068
Either we go together,
or we don't go at all.
1121
00:58:46,588 --> 00:58:49,052
Here we go. I've got some spares.
1122
00:58:49,769 --> 00:58:51,628
As I was saying, it'll be cold,
1123
00:58:51,668 --> 00:58:53,505
on account of there being no windscreen.
1124
00:58:53,868 --> 00:58:54,908
What?
1125
00:58:56,195 --> 00:58:58,755
Maybe better I just show you, Doc.
1126
00:59:04,588 --> 00:59:05,948
Really?!
1127
00:59:05,988 --> 00:59:09,708
Mind out, it's Santa coming through.
It's Santa coming through.
1128
00:59:09,748 --> 00:59:11,717
Attention, please.
1129
00:59:11,718 --> 00:59:15,788
Attention, everyone.
The parade is about to begin.
1130
00:59:15,828 --> 00:59:17,268
CHEERING
1131
00:59:17,308 --> 00:59:20,548
But before we begin,
I'd like to make a little speech.
1132
00:59:20,588 --> 00:59:22,068
- This is boring!
- I'm cold.
1133
00:59:22,108 --> 00:59:23,428
Ten years ago...
1134
00:59:23,468 --> 00:59:25,788
Santa? Maybe we could just,
you know, begin?
1135
00:59:25,828 --> 00:59:28,908
Well, we'll begin when Santa says so.
1136
00:59:28,948 --> 00:59:31,628
All those in favour
of starting the parade, say aye!
1137
00:59:31,668 --> 00:59:33,348
ALL: AYE!
1138
00:59:33,388 --> 00:59:35,708
OK, everybody behind me,
stay in formation!
1139
00:59:35,748 --> 00:59:38,068
What about Daddy?
1140
00:59:38,108 --> 00:59:40,988
Yeah, he said he really wanted
to be here, but...
1141
00:59:41,028 --> 00:59:44,468
Don't worry about Daddy, little man.
Santa's here now.
1142
00:59:44,508 --> 00:59:49,148
Ho-ho-ho! Merry Christmas!
1143
00:59:49,188 --> 00:59:52,828
Merry Christmas, everyone!
1144
00:59:52,868 --> 00:59:55,108
- Ho-ho-ho!
- What the...?
1145
00:59:55,148 --> 00:59:58,354
Sit down! Your leg!
You'll burst the stitches.
1146
00:59:58,379 --> 01:00:00,189
Keep your eyes on the road.
1147
01:00:00,266 --> 01:00:04,658
Merry Christmas, everybody!
1148
01:00:04,979 --> 01:00:07,574
- Presents for everyone!
- Martin?!
1149
01:00:07,575 --> 01:00:08,698
Hello.
1150
01:00:08,699 --> 01:00:13,375
Merry Christmas! Ho-ho-ho!
1151
01:00:13,649 --> 01:00:16,000
- Merry Christmas!
- Put your seatbelt on.
1152
01:00:16,185 --> 01:00:18,742
- Come on, Doc!
- All right.
1153
01:00:19,514 --> 01:00:22,843
CHEERING
1154
01:00:22,844 --> 01:00:26,219
All together now! Ho-ho-ho!
1155
01:00:26,259 --> 01:00:28,259
PARADERS:♪ Jingle all the way
1156
01:00:28,314 --> 01:00:32,659
♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride
In a one-horse open sleigh, hey!
1157
01:00:32,660 --> 01:00:36,848
♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
1158
01:00:36,849 --> 01:00:40,192
♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride
In a one-horse... ♪
1159
01:00:40,245 --> 01:00:43,285
Told you I'd show you
the magic of Christmas, didn't I?
1160
01:00:43,325 --> 01:00:46,805
Er, yes. Yes, you did, yes.
But take it easy. Stay here.
1161
01:00:46,845 --> 01:00:48,212
- Best seat in the house, Doc.
- Yeah.
1162
01:00:48,237 --> 01:00:51,228
- Mummy!
- Did you enjoy that? Did you?
1163
01:00:52,298 --> 01:00:56,258
- Well, that was quite an entrance.
- I wanted to be here on time.
1164
01:00:56,525 --> 01:00:58,205
Daddy!
1165
01:01:01,597 --> 01:01:03,954
- Did you enjoy that?
- Yes!
1166
01:01:09,006 --> 01:01:11,047
There we go, my love, you take care now.
1167
01:01:11,048 --> 01:01:12,876
I thought I said no sky lanterns.
1168
01:01:12,877 --> 01:01:15,621
During the parade, yes.
But the parade's over now.
1169
01:01:15,885 --> 01:01:18,790
Oh, come on. It's Christmas,
everybody's enjoying themselves.
1170
01:01:18,791 --> 01:01:20,405
No means no!
1171
01:01:20,445 --> 01:01:23,405
You know what, you're a great Santa.
1172
01:01:24,634 --> 01:01:26,906
- Really?
- Best we've ever had.
1173
01:01:28,095 --> 01:01:31,139
Well, I suppose you have already
given them out, haven't you?
1174
01:01:31,140 --> 01:01:34,485
- So...
- Here, go on. On the house.
1175
01:01:34,525 --> 01:01:36,915
Thanks. Merry Christmas, Bert.
1176
01:01:36,916 --> 01:01:39,005
And Merry Christmas to you, too.
1177
01:01:40,140 --> 01:01:43,937
OK. I believe you. The turkey escaped.
1178
01:01:44,703 --> 01:01:48,245
- I let it go.
- Oh, I knew it, Mor. I knew it.
1179
01:01:48,285 --> 01:01:49,451
I'm sorry.
1180
01:01:49,802 --> 01:01:54,074
I think I was just feeling
a bit broody and hormonal.
1181
01:01:54,405 --> 01:01:56,111
Right, yeah.
1182
01:01:56,365 --> 01:01:59,085
You know, because of the baby.
1183
01:02:00,588 --> 01:02:02,938
What, the... the baby turkey?
1184
01:02:04,232 --> 01:02:07,165
- No.
- What, er...?
1185
01:02:11,571 --> 01:02:15,171
I was gonna wait till Christmas Day
to tell you, but, erm...
1186
01:02:15,805 --> 01:02:17,645
surprise!
1187
01:02:18,750 --> 01:02:19,708
Baby.
1188
01:02:19,709 --> 01:02:21,619
- Yeah, a baby...
- What?
1189
01:02:21,620 --> 01:02:25,045
- Our baby.
- Oh, Mor! Mor!
1190
01:02:28,165 --> 01:02:29,949
We're getting married. Again.
1191
01:02:29,950 --> 01:02:32,645
- Congratulations, again!
- Can I tell 'em?
1192
01:02:33,940 --> 01:02:37,060
- We're having a baby!
- Oh, it's not a competition, Al.
1193
01:02:37,085 --> 01:02:39,993
- Well...
- Congratulations!
1194
01:02:42,780 --> 01:02:44,331
Here, take this.
1195
01:02:47,718 --> 01:02:49,706
You know, some people,
when they light these lanterns,
1196
01:02:49,707 --> 01:02:51,803
they like to dedicate them to people.
1197
01:02:52,205 --> 01:02:56,228
Absent friends or family...
or maybe someone they've lost.
1198
01:02:57,742 --> 01:03:00,925
I'm not sure if my mother
would appreciate a lantern.
1199
01:03:01,990 --> 01:03:03,950
It's not for her, Martin.
1200
01:03:23,885 --> 01:03:25,125
Thank you.
1201
01:03:28,195 --> 01:03:29,557
I love you.
1202
01:03:30,818 --> 01:03:32,872
I love you, too, Martin.
1203
01:03:38,876 --> 01:03:40,282
Hang on!
1204
01:03:41,314 --> 01:03:42,805
That one, where's it going?
1205
01:03:42,845 --> 01:03:45,212
Is that your lantern burning up?
1206
01:03:46,830 --> 01:03:49,597
Yeah, it looks like it's falling.
1207
01:03:49,886 --> 01:03:53,816
As long as the wind doesn't catch it
and it lands in the sea.
1208
01:03:55,591 --> 01:03:57,577
I think it's coming this way.
1209
01:04:03,335 --> 01:04:05,780
Oh, that's bad. Oh, dear.
1210
01:04:07,236 --> 01:04:10,151
Erm, sorry. Sorry, everybody,
but I, er...
1211
01:04:10,284 --> 01:04:11,524
James!
1212
01:04:11,929 --> 01:04:15,405
Martin! James! James, come here.
1213
01:04:16,453 --> 01:04:19,564
Where's Penhale?
Penhale, call the fire brigade!
1214
01:04:19,565 --> 01:04:22,431
Everybody, stand back. Stand back!
1215
01:04:26,560 --> 01:04:29,939
Subtitle extracted & improved by
Se7enOfNin9 for Addic7ed.com
91423
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
