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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:02:20,349 --> 00:02:22,517 I'm terribly sorry, did I disturb you? 2 00:02:22,726 --> 00:02:23,809 Mrs barrow: I should scream. 3 00:02:23,810 --> 00:02:24,936 I shan't keep you a moment. 4 00:02:26,938 --> 00:02:29,316 Don't do that, you might disturb the neighbours. 5 00:02:31,610 --> 00:02:33,690 I must compliment you on your good taste, by the way. 6 00:02:33,904 --> 00:02:35,614 You have such beautiful objects. 7 00:02:37,157 --> 00:02:40,035 I particularly like the Picasso lithographs in the hall. 8 00:02:41,620 --> 00:02:43,455 However, of all the beautiful objects 9 00:02:44,289 --> 00:02:47,584 I must say, you are by far the most exquisite. 10 00:02:55,717 --> 00:02:56,717 I shall scream. 11 00:02:58,136 --> 00:02:59,136 Later. 12 00:05:08,975 --> 00:05:10,055 Emily barrow: It was awful. 13 00:05:14,773 --> 00:05:16,525 Sorry about that I caught it off the wife. 14 00:05:17,609 --> 00:05:20,695 Nothing more you can think of that might be of any help, mrs barrow? 15 00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:24,699 Oh it was awful, him standing there like that. 16 00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:27,118 If only I'd been here to protect you. 17 00:05:27,536 --> 00:05:29,204 I'm on nights this week you see. 18 00:05:29,621 --> 00:05:32,582 I do voluntary social work looking after inadequates. 19 00:05:33,875 --> 00:05:34,876 Yes, I see. 20 00:05:35,126 --> 00:05:37,170 Now if I can just recap. 21 00:05:38,213 --> 00:05:41,258 "I was awakened at about 2:30 am by a noise. 22 00:05:41,508 --> 00:05:42,843 I got up to investigate. 23 00:05:43,134 --> 00:05:45,345 I went into the dining room and switched on the light. 24 00:05:45,679 --> 00:05:48,473 I saw a man standing there by the window going through the silver." 25 00:05:48,682 --> 00:05:50,100 Yes that's right. 26 00:05:50,267 --> 00:05:53,728 I was so frightened, I didn't know what to do. 27 00:05:53,937 --> 00:05:56,218 Constable: Then we come on to your description of the man. 28 00:05:56,523 --> 00:06:00,860 "He wore a small black velvet mask, ginger hair, height about six feet, four 29 00:06:00,861 --> 00:06:05,657 stocky build, sallow complexion, age somewhere between 40 and 50. 30 00:06:06,032 --> 00:06:07,284 Spoke with a Russian accent." 31 00:06:09,536 --> 00:06:13,080 "He pushed past me, seized my Jewel case and ran out of the flat." 32 00:06:14,624 --> 00:06:18,127 Please, constable, my wife's recovering from a very nasty shock. 33 00:06:19,379 --> 00:06:20,379 Right then. 34 00:06:20,630 --> 00:06:22,716 Your husband's given me a list of yourjewellery. 35 00:06:23,300 --> 00:06:25,510 I daresay you'll be hearing from us pretty quick. 36 00:06:26,219 --> 00:06:29,431 In the meantime, if you do happen to remember anything else 37 00:06:29,764 --> 00:06:30,849 you know where we are. 38 00:06:31,641 --> 00:06:32,641 Good day madam. 39 00:06:59,044 --> 00:07:00,378 Disgusting! 40 00:07:02,756 --> 00:07:04,036 Inspector Smith: Must be a gang. 41 00:07:04,633 --> 00:07:06,843 Absolutely disgusting. 42 00:07:07,177 --> 00:07:08,696 Inspector Smith: Every description different. 43 00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:09,763 These Jewel robberies 44 00:07:10,764 --> 00:07:11,973 it must be a gang operation. 45 00:07:12,891 --> 00:07:14,017 Or a master of disguise. 46 00:07:15,226 --> 00:07:18,270 Well, who could disguise himself as a club footed coloured midget one week 47 00:07:18,271 --> 00:07:20,315 and a six foot six Russian with a hairlip the next? 48 00:07:21,232 --> 00:07:22,317 Out of work actor maybe? 49 00:07:23,485 --> 00:07:25,862 Christ, seven burglaries in three months. 50 00:07:26,154 --> 00:07:28,989 Always the same trademark and yet seven totally different descriptions. 51 00:07:30,492 --> 00:07:31,742 The old man's doing his nut 52 00:07:31,743 --> 00:07:33,783 and the identity kit boys aren't even talking to me. 53 00:07:34,245 --> 00:07:35,445 They think I'm having them on. 54 00:07:35,622 --> 00:07:38,667 So what do you want me to check on, multiracial gangs or out of work actors? 55 00:07:39,459 --> 00:07:40,459 I'll check myself 56 00:07:41,795 --> 00:07:42,921 with the latest victim. 57 00:07:44,297 --> 00:07:45,297 What's her name? 58 00:07:46,132 --> 00:07:47,592 - Mrs barrow? - Yeah. 59 00:07:49,177 --> 00:07:50,177 Well, come on. 60 00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:54,641 I do have this latest consignment of dodgy magazines to check sir. 61 00:07:55,558 --> 00:07:57,101 We're in the middle of a bloody crime wave 62 00:07:57,102 --> 00:07:59,302 and they keep pinching my men for the pornography squad. 63 00:08:00,563 --> 00:08:02,123 Can't you just leave that for a moment? 64 00:08:02,774 --> 00:08:03,774 Plinth?! 65 00:08:05,026 --> 00:08:06,026 Yes sir. 66 00:08:13,743 --> 00:08:17,080 I'll fetch it with me sir, I could always work on it in the car. 67 00:08:19,332 --> 00:08:21,292 Oh, it was awful, awful. 68 00:08:21,710 --> 00:08:23,128 I kept protesting, of course, 69 00:08:23,753 --> 00:08:28,425 but he just kept saying 'nyet nyet' in that dreadful, grating accent. 70 00:08:29,467 --> 00:08:31,347 What makes you think it was Russian, mrs barrow? 71 00:08:32,053 --> 00:08:33,596 Oh, I couldn't be sure, I mean, 72 00:08:34,014 --> 00:08:36,307 he could have been Serbian, croat or something, 73 00:08:36,766 --> 00:08:37,851 or even Icelandic. 74 00:08:38,268 --> 00:08:40,353 But he gave that, well, impression. 75 00:08:41,104 --> 00:08:42,104 Yes. 76 00:08:42,355 --> 00:08:43,773 I do hope I'm being helpful. 77 00:08:44,107 --> 00:08:45,150 Oh, yes, yes. 78 00:08:46,109 --> 00:08:49,320 Tell me you did say it was 2:30 am this happened? 79 00:08:49,571 --> 00:08:52,407 Tell me, why didn't you call the police before six in the morning? 80 00:08:53,408 --> 00:08:54,909 Oh, was it that long? 81 00:08:55,618 --> 00:08:57,871 I mean, I was stressed, I was fraught, uh 82 00:08:58,288 --> 00:08:59,768 and that's when my husband came home. 83 00:08:59,998 --> 00:09:02,459 Yes, I do social work at night you see. 84 00:09:03,043 --> 00:09:04,210 Looking after inadequates. 85 00:09:05,795 --> 00:09:06,795 I see. 86 00:09:07,756 --> 00:09:11,259 And that's when you felt sufficiently recovered from the shock to phone us? 87 00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:12,551 Exactly. 88 00:09:13,470 --> 00:09:15,345 Thank you, mrs barrow, mr barrow. 89 00:09:15,346 --> 00:09:16,746 That's all we need to know for now. 90 00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:19,197 I might need to question you again later. 91 00:09:19,476 --> 00:09:21,811 Yes, of course, I'll do anything I can to help 92 00:09:22,062 --> 00:09:23,855 see that beast put behind bars. 93 00:09:24,522 --> 00:09:27,682 Hmm, well from what you told us, you may be the subject of an extradition order. 94 00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:30,028 - We'll see, sergeant plinth. - Sir? 95 00:09:30,487 --> 00:09:32,298 I don't think we'll get much more from mrs barrow. 96 00:09:32,322 --> 00:09:33,722 Is the insurance investigator here? 97 00:09:33,990 --> 00:09:35,870 Yes sir, left out in the hall with the reporter. 98 00:09:36,034 --> 00:09:37,874 - I think I'll have a word with her. - Yes sir. 99 00:09:41,247 --> 00:09:42,407 Alright, you can come in now. 100 00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:43,625 Inspector Smith's finished. 101 00:09:45,460 --> 00:09:47,420 And the inspector would like a word with you miss. 102 00:09:51,549 --> 00:09:53,510 Not bad for an insurance investigator, eh? 103 00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:55,595 She could settle my claim any time. 104 00:09:55,804 --> 00:09:57,564 You reporters you're all the same aren't you? 105 00:09:57,806 --> 00:09:59,098 Sex mad! 106 00:10:00,183 --> 00:10:01,863 Go on if you want to finish your interview. 107 00:10:02,644 --> 00:10:04,771 Hey, that's not bad either. 108 00:10:05,730 --> 00:10:08,210 Well you couldn't blame anyone for snatching her in, could you? 109 00:10:10,777 --> 00:10:12,377 Sorry for that interruption, mrs barrow. 110 00:10:12,862 --> 00:10:15,582 Must let the guardians of the law get on with their work, mustn't we? 111 00:10:16,074 --> 00:10:17,784 Right, now where were we? 112 00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:21,287 Ah yes, you were saying how you thought pornography and violence on television 113 00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:23,021 was encouraging this sort of thing. 114 00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:25,792 Uh, I thought you said that? 115 00:10:26,126 --> 00:10:28,046 Well, it's the same thing these days, mrs barrow. 116 00:10:28,378 --> 00:10:29,378 It's all violence. 117 00:10:29,504 --> 00:10:31,704 You know, you're very lucky he only took your jewellery. 118 00:10:31,923 --> 00:10:33,123 He didn't harm you in any way. 119 00:10:33,341 --> 00:10:35,260 Well, he was in such a rush, you see. 120 00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:39,638 Uh there was an emerald necklace, for example, valued at over £11,000. 121 00:10:39,639 --> 00:10:41,598 Judy Marvin: Mrs barrow, I really don't think it's wise 122 00:10:41,599 --> 00:10:44,518 to have that sort of information printed in a newspaper. 123 00:10:44,519 --> 00:10:45,645 Guy Hammond: Oh, come on. 124 00:10:46,271 --> 00:10:47,689 I insist it's printed. 125 00:10:47,939 --> 00:10:50,139 I don't want him to think he's got away with everything. 126 00:10:50,483 --> 00:10:53,194 I mean, well, it'll be a comfort to anyone who reads it 127 00:10:53,611 --> 00:10:55,780 to think that burglars don't take everything. 128 00:10:56,156 --> 00:10:58,366 That's the only reason I want it printed, I assure you. 129 00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:01,493 She's asking for trouble, you know, saying things like that to the press, 130 00:11:01,494 --> 00:11:02,787 especially guy Hammond. 131 00:11:03,955 --> 00:11:06,291 Not much I can do if she wants to invite another burglary. 132 00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:08,167 Have you found anything? 133 00:11:08,751 --> 00:11:10,461 Same as all the others, not a single clue. 134 00:11:10,837 --> 00:11:12,422 - No progress at all? - No. 135 00:11:13,423 --> 00:11:14,424 You? 136 00:11:15,466 --> 00:11:16,926 Let's drown our sorrow, shall we? 137 00:11:22,390 --> 00:11:24,910 Judy Marvin: It's costing the insurance company a small fortune. 138 00:11:25,476 --> 00:11:27,937 Five out of the seven burglaries have been our clients. 139 00:11:28,730 --> 00:11:31,191 Yeah, I remember you thinking there might be a connection. 140 00:11:32,775 --> 00:11:34,694 One of my more inspired ideas. 141 00:11:35,445 --> 00:11:38,280 Not that it came to anything other than upsetting half the staff. 142 00:11:39,449 --> 00:11:41,408 Didn't exactly please my boss either. 143 00:11:42,452 --> 00:11:44,494 You know, if I don't come up with something positive soon, 144 00:11:44,495 --> 00:11:45,704 I'm going to be out of a job. 145 00:11:47,248 --> 00:11:48,248 You know, miss Marvin. 146 00:11:48,458 --> 00:11:49,917 Oh please call me Judy. 147 00:11:51,753 --> 00:11:55,172 Judy, if I don't solve this case quickly, I'm going to be in trouble too. 148 00:11:56,466 --> 00:11:57,800 I hear them all whispering now 149 00:11:57,967 --> 00:11:59,087 pratty would have solved it. 150 00:12:00,136 --> 00:12:01,888 I took Pratt's place when he retired. 151 00:12:03,056 --> 00:12:06,017 Inspector Pratt, yes he was quite famous, wasn't he? 152 00:12:06,517 --> 00:12:07,517 Right. 153 00:12:08,102 --> 00:12:10,396 This is my chance to really prove myself 154 00:12:11,105 --> 00:12:12,565 and I can't even find a single clue. 155 00:12:13,399 --> 00:12:14,399 Not one. 156 00:12:14,692 --> 00:12:15,692 Not even half a clue. 157 00:12:16,986 --> 00:12:18,196 Never mind, inspector. 158 00:12:19,530 --> 00:12:20,530 Robert. 159 00:12:21,324 --> 00:12:23,076 No offence but I'm afraid I do mind. 160 00:12:23,952 --> 00:12:25,369 I'm sure something will turn up. 161 00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:32,627 You know, Judy, there's something about you I really admire. 162 00:12:33,419 --> 00:12:34,419 Tits. 163 00:12:35,463 --> 00:12:36,965 I'm a big tit man myself. 164 00:12:37,298 --> 00:12:39,842 No, arses and thighs, that's me. 165 00:12:40,426 --> 00:12:41,844 I have dreams at night about them. 166 00:12:42,095 --> 00:12:44,471 Oh, don't mistake me, I mean I like arses and thighs too 167 00:12:44,472 --> 00:12:47,809 but... tits you know, great big ones. 168 00:12:48,643 --> 00:12:49,643 That's really something. 169 00:12:51,062 --> 00:12:54,124 I tell you, when I firstjoined the force, I asked to go with the vice squad but 170 00:12:54,148 --> 00:12:55,468 there's such a long waiting list. 171 00:12:56,317 --> 00:12:58,860 I suppose you must get access to some pretty hot stuff up the yard. 172 00:12:58,861 --> 00:13:00,780 - Yeah. - You know, photos and things. 173 00:13:02,490 --> 00:13:04,570 Most of it's under lock and key, of course, but um... 174 00:13:05,118 --> 00:13:07,038 Now and again, you manage to get a quick glimpse. 175 00:13:07,704 --> 00:13:08,824 I'll tell you the other day, 176 00:13:10,373 --> 00:13:11,642 a couple of boys from the flying squad, 177 00:13:11,666 --> 00:13:14,127 they seized a bunch of really hard-core porn stuff. 178 00:13:14,919 --> 00:13:16,420 They were trying to smuggle it in through customs. 179 00:13:16,421 --> 00:13:17,922 - Yeah. - Well there was one. 180 00:13:19,007 --> 00:13:21,127 I'll tell you I've never seen anything like it before. 181 00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:22,801 It was this, um 182 00:13:23,636 --> 00:13:27,724 this bird like, beautiful tits, beautiful. 183 00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:30,518 She'd got this stuffed rhinoceros on her... 184 00:14:21,110 --> 00:14:23,237 What you came for is under here with me. 185 00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:36,959 - It's all insured. - Grant Henry: Good. 186 00:14:37,585 --> 00:14:38,785 Then we'll both get something. 187 00:14:39,128 --> 00:14:42,006 But, if you don't mind, I won't stay, I'm very tired. 188 00:14:42,799 --> 00:14:45,550 I do hope you haven't worn yourself out breaking and entering 189 00:14:45,551 --> 00:14:47,386 but if you want them, you've got to take them. 190 00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:49,805 Grant Henry: No really, thank you, I mustn't be too late back 191 00:14:49,806 --> 00:14:52,126 I have to be up early in the morning and... you understand? 192 00:14:52,767 --> 00:14:54,977 I'm sure the police would understand, but of course, 193 00:14:55,520 --> 00:14:56,960 they might not let you sleep either. 194 00:17:21,290 --> 00:17:22,833 Ah good morning. 195 00:17:23,209 --> 00:17:24,460 My usual carnation please? 196 00:17:24,669 --> 00:17:26,337 - Just the one sir. - Ah yes thank you. 197 00:17:26,504 --> 00:17:28,214 Oh that'll be 10p. 198 00:17:28,631 --> 00:17:30,671 - Thank you very much, good day to you. - Thank you. 199 00:17:31,092 --> 00:17:32,092 God bless. 200 00:17:40,101 --> 00:17:42,270 Ah, is he up yet? 201 00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:44,896 Had a late night of it, dead to the world when I arrived. 202 00:17:44,897 --> 00:17:46,524 - Yes, but is he up? - Just about. 203 00:17:46,983 --> 00:17:49,143 - Would you like coffee? - Jacobi: Oh, I wouldn't mind. 204 00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:52,280 Well, I'm glad to hear he's working again. 205 00:17:53,323 --> 00:17:55,043 Grant always writes his best stuff at night. 206 00:17:55,658 --> 00:17:56,659 It's all right for you. 207 00:17:57,076 --> 00:17:59,370 I have to transcribe it while he sleeps all day. 208 00:17:59,787 --> 00:18:02,707 Oh, as long as he brings the work in on time, I don't care when he sleeps. 209 00:18:03,499 --> 00:18:05,459 What about the latest? Has it got a title yet? 210 00:18:05,876 --> 00:18:07,253 The dirty and the dying, I think, 211 00:18:08,170 --> 00:18:09,463 hasn't made his mind up yet. 212 00:18:10,298 --> 00:18:13,178 Um, what about the proof for the new cover design, has that come through? 213 00:18:13,217 --> 00:18:14,468 No, not yet. 214 00:18:15,886 --> 00:18:17,972 Well, it should have done, it was posted on Friday. 215 00:18:18,180 --> 00:18:20,057 Well, as far as I know, it hasn't arrived, 216 00:18:20,224 --> 00:18:22,226 unless Grant's got them and forgot to tell me. 217 00:18:36,198 --> 00:18:37,241 Oh hello jacobi, 218 00:18:38,159 --> 00:18:40,160 I thought I heard your dulcet sweet tones. 219 00:18:40,161 --> 00:18:43,163 Hey listen, did you get those cover designs through for virgin vengeance? 220 00:18:43,164 --> 00:18:44,915 Virgin vengeance? No why? 221 00:18:45,249 --> 00:18:47,489 Oh, bloody Arnold he's supposed to have posted them on... 222 00:18:47,710 --> 00:18:50,379 Hello, mr riddle, jacobi here. 223 00:18:52,089 --> 00:18:53,089 Hello, Arnold? 224 00:18:53,549 --> 00:18:55,669 Where the hell have those bloody cover designs got to? 225 00:18:56,594 --> 00:18:58,971 Yes, I know, you told me you posted them on Friday. 226 00:19:00,890 --> 00:19:03,851 No, well of course, I'm sure I'm sitting right here with him now. 227 00:19:08,856 --> 00:19:10,656 Jacobi: Fire her and get yourself another one. 228 00:19:11,525 --> 00:19:14,195 If you're going to screw them, screw one that's efficient. 229 00:19:21,285 --> 00:19:24,245 They should be round later this afternoon, he's sending them round by hand. 230 00:19:25,373 --> 00:19:27,750 Right, so how many chapters have you got for me? 231 00:19:32,171 --> 00:19:35,466 As your publisher, I'd say that's definitely a best seller. 232 00:19:36,258 --> 00:19:38,594 Worth a nice advance on royalties don't you think? 233 00:19:39,428 --> 00:19:41,430 What it is to be a creative artist. 234 00:20:09,125 --> 00:20:12,336 I tell you, if he'd ever have been allowed to join the club, I'd have resigned. 235 00:20:12,586 --> 00:20:14,839 I had a letter to the secretary written out already. 236 00:20:15,756 --> 00:20:17,425 I say! 237 00:20:18,050 --> 00:20:20,886 Isn't that Grant Henry, the writer fellow? 238 00:20:21,095 --> 00:20:22,138 See you too. 239 00:20:23,597 --> 00:20:24,932 - Scotch? - Uh yes thank you. 240 00:20:27,518 --> 00:20:28,643 Did you know him? 241 00:20:28,644 --> 00:20:31,396 No, I don't go in for reading much 242 00:20:31,397 --> 00:20:33,441 browse of the financial times and that's about all. 243 00:20:33,649 --> 00:20:35,024 - Do you know him Freddy? - Well 244 00:20:35,025 --> 00:20:36,484 - actually yes. - No? 245 00:20:36,485 --> 00:20:37,653 We went to school together. 246 00:20:38,446 --> 00:20:42,074 Can't remember him as very brainy though, I must say for a chap that writes books. 247 00:20:42,533 --> 00:20:46,035 I say does one actually earn money from that kind of thing? 248 00:20:46,036 --> 00:20:47,036 I've no idea. 249 00:20:47,580 --> 00:20:49,081 He always seems to have money. 250 00:20:49,749 --> 00:20:53,127 He probably gets vast sums for film rights that sort of thing. 251 00:20:53,544 --> 00:20:57,131 I got an uncle who writes books, mainly about pigs. 252 00:20:57,882 --> 00:21:00,362 I don't suppose anybody wants to make a film about them though. 253 00:21:02,720 --> 00:21:04,764 He was a jolly good athlete, I remember that. 254 00:21:05,014 --> 00:21:06,014 My uncle? 255 00:21:06,557 --> 00:21:08,350 No, no. Grant Henry. 256 00:21:09,602 --> 00:21:11,145 Grant, how are you? 257 00:21:11,479 --> 00:21:12,879 - Grant Henry: Freddy. - Do join us. 258 00:21:12,980 --> 00:21:14,231 Do you know lord Prescott? 259 00:21:14,440 --> 00:21:16,066 - No I don't think I do. - Porky to us. 260 00:21:16,358 --> 00:21:18,235 - And Ian wesleydale. - Oh how do you do? 261 00:21:19,487 --> 00:21:20,613 I've heard about you. 262 00:21:20,863 --> 00:21:22,063 You write thrillers don't you? 263 00:21:22,406 --> 00:21:24,825 - Grant Henry: Uh yes. - Ah how jolly thrilling! 264 00:21:25,159 --> 00:21:27,703 You know, I once knew a man who knew Ian Fleming. 265 00:21:27,953 --> 00:21:30,122 - Really? - Yes, he was a writer, too. 266 00:21:30,372 --> 00:21:33,876 - Yes so I believe. - Yes and he played golf frightfully well. 267 00:21:34,043 --> 00:21:38,463 At least that's the story I heard from the man I knew who knew him. 268 00:21:39,632 --> 00:21:41,509 - Yes. - Well, my dear chap. 269 00:21:41,759 --> 00:21:43,928 - How's the world treating you? - Oh, can't complain. 270 00:21:44,220 --> 00:21:47,556 You know, I see your paperbacks on railway book stores frequently. 271 00:21:47,765 --> 00:21:48,933 Gathering dust I'm afraid. 272 00:21:49,099 --> 00:21:50,434 Oh, come on 273 00:21:50,643 --> 00:21:53,312 all you writers earn fortunes, it's the film rights. 274 00:21:53,479 --> 00:21:55,399 Wesleydale: I say have you ever met Sophia loren? 275 00:21:55,898 --> 00:21:57,525 - Grant Henry: No. - Or Jane Fonda? 276 00:21:59,527 --> 00:22:00,778 Oh pity. 277 00:22:01,570 --> 00:22:03,730 I'm afraid I haven't sold any of my books to films yet. 278 00:22:03,948 --> 00:22:05,741 When you do, be sure to have them both in it. 279 00:22:06,075 --> 00:22:07,076 Yes, yes, I'll try. 280 00:22:07,284 --> 00:22:09,118 - They're jolly good. - Yes. 281 00:22:10,287 --> 00:22:13,582 My wife florinda reads a lot of books and magazines. 282 00:22:13,874 --> 00:22:16,126 I must tell her I've met you, she'll be thrilled. 283 00:22:16,460 --> 00:22:18,003 She reads, writing you know. 284 00:22:18,712 --> 00:22:20,072 It's the best thing to do with it. 285 00:22:21,048 --> 00:22:22,442 Grant Henry: Are you still living in the country? 286 00:22:22,466 --> 00:22:23,843 Oh, yes, well we all do. 287 00:22:24,093 --> 00:22:26,262 Came up to town tonight with Ian and met porky. 288 00:22:26,679 --> 00:22:27,930 We go wrestling together. 289 00:22:28,848 --> 00:22:29,848 You wrestle? 290 00:22:30,224 --> 00:22:31,559 No no we watch it. 291 00:22:31,767 --> 00:22:33,227 - Ha! - All over the place. 292 00:22:33,435 --> 00:22:35,980 Shoreditch town hall tonight, frightfully amusing spot. 293 00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:37,720 Then Ian and I will drive back. 294 00:22:37,982 --> 00:22:40,817 - But you're staying? - Yes, we have a small place in town. 295 00:22:40,818 --> 00:22:44,530 We don't keep staff or anything like that a 'pied-é-terre.' 296 00:22:44,905 --> 00:22:46,239 you must pop around sometime. 297 00:22:46,240 --> 00:22:48,117 Florinda would love to meet you. 298 00:22:48,492 --> 00:22:51,829 She loves actors and writers and that sort of person. 299 00:22:52,496 --> 00:22:53,496 But not wrestlers. 300 00:22:53,831 --> 00:22:55,916 No, she prefers to watch it on the telly. 301 00:22:56,458 --> 00:22:59,086 Hyde park place, you must pop round. 302 00:22:59,545 --> 00:23:01,338 Penthouse, numbers in the book. 303 00:23:02,298 --> 00:23:03,298 Thanks. 304 00:23:04,008 --> 00:23:05,175 I just might do that. 305 00:23:06,176 --> 00:23:09,263 Porky Prescott: I say we've got a spare ticket if you'd like to come along, 306 00:23:09,430 --> 00:23:10,555 you're more than welcome. 307 00:23:10,556 --> 00:23:12,683 Grant Henry: Thanks again but I have to work tonight. 308 00:23:13,225 --> 00:23:16,186 I promised my publisher I'd have something for him in the morning. 309 00:23:20,941 --> 00:23:24,611 Florinda Prescott: Oh I mean, you don't have to do that kind of thing in public. 310 00:23:24,612 --> 00:23:26,256 Announcement: And now ladies and gentlemen. 311 00:23:26,280 --> 00:23:29,240 Well, quite darling, I certainly won't go down there for the weekend again. 312 00:23:30,743 --> 00:23:31,743 I know! 313 00:23:31,952 --> 00:23:35,413 It's when they start doing it in front of the children that I object 314 00:23:35,414 --> 00:23:37,291 not that the eldest's his anyway. 315 00:23:38,250 --> 00:23:41,420 If he was mine, I certainly wouldn't let him behave like that. 316 00:23:41,629 --> 00:23:43,429 Well, not in front of the guests, at any rate. 317 00:23:44,048 --> 00:23:49,136 You know me, darling, I'm the last one to be fussy about, we” things like that 318 00:23:49,762 --> 00:23:52,597 but when you're at a formal dinner party and suddenly 319 00:23:52,598 --> 00:23:54,600 he gets it out and start stirring the soup with it, 320 00:23:55,184 --> 00:23:58,895 well, darling, I for one, find it most off putting. 321 00:24:00,147 --> 00:24:01,189 What darling? 322 00:24:02,566 --> 00:24:05,861 Oh I never did believe that story anyway. 323 00:24:06,820 --> 00:24:08,489 I mean, he's much too good a swimmer. 324 00:24:10,115 --> 00:24:12,993 Do you remember that weekend down at Harriet's? 325 00:24:14,036 --> 00:24:16,205 No, Rodney's Harriet. 326 00:24:17,498 --> 00:24:21,710 That's the one who ran away with the lesbian waitress from fortnums. 327 00:24:22,711 --> 00:24:23,711 That's right. 328 00:24:24,463 --> 00:24:29,426 They ended up in the south of France just after Stephanie's third abortion. 329 00:24:31,470 --> 00:24:32,470 Fourth was it? 330 00:24:55,661 --> 00:25:00,082 Well, anyway, I was down there for the weekend just after Christmas. 331 00:25:01,834 --> 00:25:02,834 Yes. 332 00:25:03,794 --> 00:25:07,172 Yes well anway, clive, was there. 333 00:25:13,971 --> 00:25:17,057 That is assuming that she is his mother. 334 00:25:19,393 --> 00:25:23,772 Well, darling, after what Cynthia garnet-Lovell told me at Tony's 21st. 335 00:25:26,191 --> 00:25:29,528 No marriage darling, not birthday. 336 00:26:08,776 --> 00:26:10,819 M-My husband's downstairs. 337 00:26:11,779 --> 00:26:15,199 I mean I've only got to make the slightest sound and he'll come running. 338 00:26:17,409 --> 00:26:19,703 I can't believe any husband, 339 00:26:20,370 --> 00:26:22,790 could allow such a beautiful woman, 340 00:26:23,457 --> 00:26:25,709 to go to bed, alone. 341 00:26:28,629 --> 00:26:30,339 Your neck is so beautiful, so white. 342 00:26:31,048 --> 00:26:32,048 So firm. 343 00:26:33,926 --> 00:26:34,968 This is madness. 344 00:26:36,136 --> 00:26:40,432 Your a handsome burglar and I'm an unhappily married woman. 345 00:26:43,811 --> 00:26:45,729 Yes, it is madness. 346 00:26:46,188 --> 00:26:47,981 You, so exquisite. 347 00:26:48,482 --> 00:26:49,608 - Making me mad. - No! 348 00:26:50,150 --> 00:26:51,693 But my husband wouldn't like it. 349 00:26:52,111 --> 00:26:53,904 Your husband's not going to get it. 350 00:27:20,639 --> 00:27:22,891 No please. Please no. 351 00:27:23,767 --> 00:27:24,767 Oh! 352 00:27:27,312 --> 00:27:28,312 Yes. 353 00:29:18,048 --> 00:29:19,508 So what is it she's missing? 354 00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:21,301 About £80,000 worth sir. 355 00:29:22,427 --> 00:29:23,887 What was it lady Prescott said? 356 00:29:24,680 --> 00:29:27,932 Small, about 45, black beard and one arm. 357 00:29:32,354 --> 00:29:33,939 If only I had something to go on. 358 00:29:34,815 --> 00:29:35,815 Anything. 359 00:29:36,900 --> 00:29:39,580 I tell you sergeant this man's harder to catch then Jack the ripper. 360 00:29:39,945 --> 00:29:41,947 Don't worry, sir, he'll make a mistake. 361 00:29:42,489 --> 00:29:43,615 They always do. 362 00:29:46,618 --> 00:29:47,618 It's not right, you know. 363 00:29:48,620 --> 00:29:51,415 There's no pictures, there ought to be pictures. 364 00:29:51,915 --> 00:29:54,315 I mean, how else are you supposed to know what he's on about? 365 00:30:08,974 --> 00:30:10,142 Hello Judy, Marvin here. 366 00:30:10,309 --> 00:30:13,645 Inspector Smith: Hello, I'm afraid our burgling friend struck again last night. 367 00:30:14,146 --> 00:30:16,386 Or one of them, I'm beginning to think it must be a gang. 368 00:30:16,982 --> 00:30:19,401 Uh, does your company have an insurance for lord Prescott? 369 00:30:20,235 --> 00:30:21,320 No, thank god. 370 00:30:22,029 --> 00:30:24,072 I just had a rocket from my boss to. 371 00:30:24,448 --> 00:30:27,528 If I don't come up with something positive soon, I'm going to be out of a job. 372 00:30:28,493 --> 00:30:31,246 Would it help if I gave him a ring, had a word with him? 373 00:30:32,247 --> 00:30:35,247 That's very kind of you, Robert, but I don't think it would have any effect. 374 00:30:35,584 --> 00:30:37,835 He never wanted a woman in the job in the first place. 375 00:30:37,836 --> 00:30:39,087 Now it's proving the point. 376 00:30:39,588 --> 00:30:40,828 We seem to be in the same boat. 377 00:30:42,174 --> 00:30:45,260 Well, don't wear this thief he'll make a mistake, they always do. 378 00:30:46,636 --> 00:30:48,930 Well, I only hope he makes it before the end of next week. 379 00:31:06,865 --> 00:31:08,783 So where's the photographer? 380 00:31:08,784 --> 00:31:11,953 This is London baby not Rome, now come on. 381 00:31:41,191 --> 00:31:44,151 Jezebel will you stop doing that. 382 00:31:44,152 --> 00:31:46,487 Why, they're my clothes, for Christ's sake. 383 00:31:46,488 --> 00:31:49,241 Well, you better start taking better care of them baby. 384 00:31:49,574 --> 00:31:51,618 They may have to last you quite a while. 385 00:31:51,785 --> 00:31:53,912 So I get myself another movie. 386 00:31:54,079 --> 00:31:55,496 I'm a star ain't I? 387 00:31:55,497 --> 00:31:56,915 Sure you're a star. 388 00:31:57,082 --> 00:31:58,750 It's just you can't act. 389 00:31:59,084 --> 00:32:00,252 Listen boot-face, 390 00:32:00,419 --> 00:32:03,213 I got real good notices for hot pants broad. 391 00:32:03,588 --> 00:32:05,632 They said I was a great performer. 392 00:32:05,924 --> 00:32:09,177 Well, they weren't talking about your acting for Christ's sake. 393 00:32:09,511 --> 00:32:10,595 If I can't act 394 00:32:11,012 --> 00:32:13,974 how come I starred in seven first feature movies? 395 00:32:14,266 --> 00:32:18,186 Cause you were being screwed by the head of empire films, that's how. 396 00:32:18,520 --> 00:32:19,938 I told you, baby 397 00:32:20,105 --> 00:32:22,064 you should never have walked out on that guy. 398 00:32:22,065 --> 00:32:24,900 Like I said at the time, who needs him? 399 00:32:24,901 --> 00:32:26,987 You for one and me for another. 400 00:32:27,237 --> 00:32:28,572 Who else will give us work? 401 00:32:28,947 --> 00:32:33,242 Right now, I can't even get you publicity, let alone a god damn movie. 402 00:32:33,243 --> 00:32:36,329 Listen, why were there no photographers when I arrived? 403 00:32:36,538 --> 00:32:38,582 I always had photographers. 404 00:32:38,748 --> 00:32:42,210 Sure you always have photographers, don't I know! 405 00:32:42,502 --> 00:32:43,837 Are you making illusion? 406 00:32:44,045 --> 00:32:45,380 I ain't doing nothing. 407 00:32:45,630 --> 00:32:48,883 All I'm saying is make my life a lot more easy 408 00:32:48,884 --> 00:32:51,553 if you weren't always screwing with photographers. 409 00:32:51,928 --> 00:32:53,597 What good were they for you? 410 00:32:53,805 --> 00:32:55,639 What good did you ever do for me? 411 00:32:55,640 --> 00:32:57,601 And you're supposed to be my agent. 412 00:32:57,893 --> 00:33:01,312 Listen, just because I happen to like one or two photographers, 413 00:33:01,313 --> 00:33:03,106 what call is there for you to bitch? 414 00:33:03,440 --> 00:33:06,066 I got my pictures in the papers, didn't I? 415 00:33:06,067 --> 00:33:10,363 Great but they don't pay for pictures unless they move. 416 00:33:10,697 --> 00:33:13,200 You get movies when you get publicity. 417 00:33:13,408 --> 00:33:16,328 A good agent makes publicity for his clients. 418 00:33:16,578 --> 00:33:20,957 Listen, the only things that are making headlines over here right at this moment 419 00:33:21,291 --> 00:33:23,293 are these god damn Jewel robberies 420 00:33:23,710 --> 00:33:28,215 now maybe if you get yourself burgled or something you might hit the papers. 421 00:33:31,510 --> 00:33:33,011 Guido baby. 422 00:33:33,637 --> 00:33:35,305 I wouldn't have believed it but 423 00:33:35,555 --> 00:33:38,475 you've come up with something at last. 424 00:33:39,476 --> 00:33:40,476 I have? 425 00:33:41,228 --> 00:33:46,441 And there was this sapphire ring that was worth $15,733. 426 00:33:46,691 --> 00:33:49,736 And a diamond brooch with genuine mink all the way around 427 00:33:50,028 --> 00:33:53,490 that was only worth $5,411. 428 00:33:53,698 --> 00:33:55,938 Miss Lorraine could you tell us just how it all happened? 429 00:33:56,409 --> 00:33:57,826 Oh well, it was awful. 430 00:33:57,827 --> 00:33:59,746 My goodness it was awful. 431 00:34:00,330 --> 00:34:02,499 I was in the bathroom taking a bath, 432 00:34:02,916 --> 00:34:06,419 you know, with lots of bubbles, because they make me supple. 433 00:34:07,003 --> 00:34:10,757 Well, suddenly I heard this noise in the other room. 434 00:34:11,091 --> 00:34:12,091 The bedroom. 435 00:34:12,092 --> 00:34:14,344 Well, I thought it was my agent, you know. 436 00:34:14,678 --> 00:34:17,264 Then I remembered he said he was going to have an early night. 437 00:34:17,472 --> 00:34:21,183 So I got out of the bath and went to investigate. 438 00:34:21,184 --> 00:34:22,904 Were you wearing any clothes, miss Lorraine? 439 00:34:23,061 --> 00:34:26,064 Well, sure I was wearing clothes, I had this bathrobe on. 440 00:34:26,690 --> 00:34:30,777 Anyhow, I went into the bedroom and my goodness, there he was. 441 00:34:31,111 --> 00:34:32,571 Well, I nearly fainted. 442 00:34:32,904 --> 00:34:35,699 I mean, he was enormous. 443 00:34:36,449 --> 00:34:38,368 Could you describe him again for us, please? 444 00:34:39,077 --> 00:34:40,829 Tall, very tall, 445 00:34:41,079 --> 00:34:42,496 with black hair all over, 446 00:34:42,497 --> 00:34:45,250 but with ginger streaks in it and he was going a bit bald as well. 447 00:34:45,750 --> 00:34:48,470 But some of the descriptions in the past have said he was very small. 448 00:34:48,628 --> 00:34:50,714 Well, he did slouch a lot. 449 00:34:51,089 --> 00:34:53,550 What I meant was he was very tall when he straightened up 450 00:34:53,842 --> 00:34:56,051 and he had this black mask all over. 451 00:34:56,052 --> 00:34:59,639 And he was just well, he was just unbelievable. 452 00:35:00,181 --> 00:35:04,102 It was just like out of that movie, I did with Tony Anthony, sex o, 453 00:35:04,436 --> 00:35:06,855 where I did the scene in the bath and he suddenly came in 454 00:35:07,272 --> 00:35:10,442 dressed like he was Betty Davis and chopped me up with an icepick. 455 00:35:10,942 --> 00:35:13,777 Well, I mean, you know, I don't know if you remember the scene, 456 00:35:13,778 --> 00:35:15,696 but we had an awful lot of trouble shooting it 457 00:35:15,697 --> 00:35:16,739 - because". - Miss Lorraine. 458 00:35:16,740 --> 00:35:18,491 Did this man threaten you at all? 459 00:35:18,992 --> 00:35:20,242 Well sure he threatened me. 460 00:35:20,243 --> 00:35:22,954 He chopped me up with an ice pick, I already told you. 461 00:35:23,121 --> 00:35:24,456 I meant last night. 462 00:35:25,457 --> 00:35:28,460 Oh, yeah, well, sure, sure he threatened me. 463 00:35:28,793 --> 00:35:31,588 I mean, he was enormous this guy, like I told you, 464 00:35:32,172 --> 00:35:36,843 maybe 190, maybe 200 pounds and I was all on my own. 465 00:35:38,511 --> 00:35:39,763 And he had a gun. 466 00:35:41,306 --> 00:35:43,475 Yeah, he had a gun, this guy. 467 00:35:43,850 --> 00:35:45,018 And he threatened me with it 468 00:35:45,268 --> 00:35:48,480 saying he'd shoot me if I didn't do everything he asked me to. 469 00:35:48,730 --> 00:35:51,066 You know, like give him all my jewellery. 470 00:35:53,068 --> 00:35:54,152 And then... 471 00:35:54,861 --> 00:35:56,153 And then he raped me. 472 00:35:58,657 --> 00:36:02,786 Yeah, it was terrible, it was like a nightmare, you've no idea. 473 00:36:03,203 --> 00:36:06,748 He pointed this gun at me and forced me to undress. 474 00:36:07,123 --> 00:36:09,250 Well, you can imagine how embarrassed I felt. 475 00:36:09,417 --> 00:36:11,920 I mean, it's one thing to do it for a movie camera 476 00:36:12,212 --> 00:36:16,716 and another entirely when you're with some strange burglar wearing a mask, you know? 477 00:36:17,300 --> 00:36:21,012 Anyhow, he looked at my naked body hungrin 478 00:36:21,304 --> 00:36:24,015 and he said how I was his favourite movie star. 479 00:36:24,265 --> 00:36:27,560 And how in hot pants broad I fitted the title perfectly. 480 00:36:28,436 --> 00:36:31,439 Well, then he he got this rope 481 00:36:31,940 --> 00:36:36,486 and he forced me to lie down while he tied me up like a chicken. 482 00:36:36,986 --> 00:36:40,448 He trussed my naked body up like a chicken 483 00:36:40,782 --> 00:36:45,995 and then he raped me, seven times, one for each of my movies. 484 00:36:46,246 --> 00:36:47,246 Jesus! 485 00:36:48,123 --> 00:36:50,290 Yeah, he'd seen every one of my movies. 486 00:36:50,291 --> 00:36:52,171 Wanted to know what my next one was going to be. 487 00:36:52,460 --> 00:36:55,004 Well, I told him I was still looking for the right part. 488 00:36:55,380 --> 00:36:58,133 Of course, empire films desperately wanted me to go back, 489 00:36:58,341 --> 00:37:01,928 but, well, I'm tired of doing these kind of sexy parts. 490 00:37:02,345 --> 00:37:05,472 What I'm looking for now is something that will stretch me. 491 00:37:06,975 --> 00:37:09,227 Have you ever heard such a ridiculous story? 492 00:37:10,019 --> 00:37:11,771 Sounds more like a plot of a film to me. 493 00:37:12,105 --> 00:37:13,898 A pretty lurid plot, too, wasn't it? 494 00:37:16,067 --> 00:37:17,444 Seven times. 495 00:37:18,528 --> 00:37:19,612 That's one hell of a rape. 496 00:37:19,863 --> 00:37:22,741 It's one hell of an insurance claim she's putting in for too. 497 00:37:23,742 --> 00:37:25,542 I don't know what I'm going to say to my boss. 498 00:37:25,994 --> 00:37:28,329 So obviously a put up job for publicity. 499 00:37:29,372 --> 00:37:31,957 Tomorrow I'm going to go back there and go right through that list 500 00:37:31,958 --> 00:37:34,335 and check out everything she claims was stolen. 501 00:37:34,961 --> 00:37:36,796 I must say she's making use of the situation. 502 00:37:37,881 --> 00:37:40,761 That press conference of hers looks like it's due to go on the whole day. 503 00:37:42,886 --> 00:37:43,969 I was thinking 504 00:37:45,346 --> 00:37:47,557 If it is all a put up job for publicity, 505 00:37:48,767 --> 00:37:50,851 I wonder what the burglar's reactions are going to be 506 00:37:50,852 --> 00:37:53,021 tomorrow when he picks up the morning paper 507 00:37:53,772 --> 00:37:58,693 and reads that he's supposed to have raped one of the screen sex symbols seven times. 508 00:38:25,303 --> 00:38:27,263 Hmm, thanks love. 509 00:38:33,144 --> 00:38:34,144 Bloody hell. 510 00:38:40,401 --> 00:38:41,401 Oh! 511 00:38:41,778 --> 00:38:42,987 Good morning. Morning. 512 00:38:43,238 --> 00:38:44,655 How's my little Angie this morning? 513 00:38:44,656 --> 00:38:45,698 World's best secretary. 514 00:38:45,865 --> 00:38:46,950 Morning, mr jacobi. 515 00:38:47,242 --> 00:38:48,493 You're early, how come? 516 00:38:48,743 --> 00:38:50,078 New chapters what else? 517 00:38:50,954 --> 00:38:53,748 Morning Grant, I gather you've got quite a lot for me this morning. 518 00:38:54,249 --> 00:38:55,415 How about some coffee dear? 519 00:39:00,797 --> 00:39:02,590 Seven times? 520 00:39:02,966 --> 00:39:05,509 It's a good job Angie doesn't know about your little hobby at nights. 521 00:39:05,510 --> 00:39:06,510 Or yours. 522 00:39:06,719 --> 00:39:09,573 It's just as well you're a good fence, because you're a lousy bloody publisher. 523 00:39:09,597 --> 00:39:13,184 Well there's no money in books, unless you've got a sensation. 524 00:39:13,351 --> 00:39:15,102 Now you write your memoirs, my boy 525 00:39:15,103 --> 00:39:17,187 and we can all go straight if last night's a fair example. 526 00:39:17,188 --> 00:39:18,548 Grant Henry: Oh don't be an idiot. 527 00:39:19,274 --> 00:39:20,817 It's all a pack of bloody lies. 528 00:39:21,234 --> 00:39:22,861 Oh Grant baby you can tell me. 529 00:39:23,486 --> 00:39:25,822 Look, I told you, I never burgled anybody last night. 530 00:39:26,030 --> 00:39:27,323 I was at the theatre with Angie. 531 00:39:27,991 --> 00:39:28,991 You're joking? 532 00:39:29,909 --> 00:39:33,037 And there was I rushing over thinking you'd have all that lovely stuff for me. 533 00:39:33,204 --> 00:39:36,791 It's all lies, some stupid, bloody publicity stunt. 534 00:39:37,417 --> 00:39:38,417 What a pity. 535 00:39:38,626 --> 00:39:40,506 Reads like there was some nice stuff there, too. 536 00:39:41,129 --> 00:39:43,840 Sapphire rings, diamond necklaces. 537 00:39:44,465 --> 00:39:45,465 Coffee. 538 00:39:53,933 --> 00:39:54,933 Morning. 539 00:39:55,727 --> 00:39:57,447 I'd like to buy a Smith and Wesson revolver. 540 00:39:58,396 --> 00:40:00,690 45 calibre, heavy duty with a spin chamber. 541 00:40:01,524 --> 00:40:03,484 Yes sir, with percussion caps? 542 00:40:04,444 --> 00:40:06,613 Uh, no thank you, I don't want to make a bang. 543 00:40:07,155 --> 00:40:08,197 A water pistol then? 544 00:40:15,622 --> 00:40:18,416 Yes, yes now that would do rather nicely. 545 00:40:21,920 --> 00:40:22,920 Who's for standard? 546 00:40:23,755 --> 00:40:24,756 Who's for standard? 547 00:40:30,845 --> 00:40:31,845 Who's for standard? 548 00:40:37,810 --> 00:40:38,895 Who's for standard? 549 00:40:50,239 --> 00:40:51,599 - Taxi driver: Thank you. - Cheers. 550 00:41:08,549 --> 00:41:10,425 Sorry I'm late, I got held up in the traffic. 551 00:41:10,426 --> 00:41:11,552 That's alright. 552 00:41:12,053 --> 00:41:13,053 Have you um... 553 00:41:13,304 --> 00:41:14,305 Have you got them? 554 00:41:31,406 --> 00:41:32,740 Oh dear! 555 00:41:34,367 --> 00:41:35,951 It's fantastic. 556 00:41:35,952 --> 00:41:37,712 You know the one underneath that's very good. 557 00:41:37,745 --> 00:41:38,663 - Yeah? - Yeah. 558 00:41:38,663 --> 00:41:39,663 No, no, not that one no. 559 00:41:39,789 --> 00:41:41,707 The one where she's uh... yeah, that one. 560 00:41:43,209 --> 00:41:44,793 These are bloody marvellous right. 561 00:41:44,794 --> 00:41:46,920 Listen, you can't get hold of any in colour can you? 562 00:41:46,921 --> 00:41:49,566 I can try, I mean I may have to slip the boys a little something you know? 563 00:41:49,590 --> 00:41:50,633 No that's no problem. 564 00:41:51,467 --> 00:41:52,926 Oh what?! 565 00:41:54,178 --> 00:41:55,346 These are really good 566 00:41:56,389 --> 00:41:58,516 Christ, how did she manage that? 567 00:42:00,018 --> 00:42:01,352 Jesus just look at the size... 568 00:42:08,901 --> 00:42:10,694 Look um, I can't stay long. 569 00:42:10,695 --> 00:42:13,055 I'm supposed to be keeping an eye on miss Lorraine upstairs. 570 00:42:13,448 --> 00:42:14,531 Can't be bad. 571 00:42:14,532 --> 00:42:17,412 Not for me, I don't fancy being the subject of her next press conference. 572 00:42:17,535 --> 00:42:18,535 You're dead right. 573 00:42:19,078 --> 00:42:20,723 Did you hear the story about the guy who got applause 574 00:42:20,747 --> 00:42:21,956 writing a new musical for her. 575 00:42:22,331 --> 00:42:24,751 - No. - Yeah, it's called clap. 576 00:44:06,686 --> 00:44:08,146 Ah I really ought to be going. 577 00:44:10,731 --> 00:44:11,731 Cheers Roy. 578 00:44:52,231 --> 00:44:53,231 Grant Henry: Evening. 579 00:44:54,192 --> 00:44:55,592 Do I seem to have been here before? 580 00:44:58,237 --> 00:45:00,865 This can hardly come to you as a surprise. 581 00:45:03,492 --> 00:45:05,077 Now then first things first, 582 00:45:05,703 --> 00:45:06,746 your jewels. 583 00:45:07,705 --> 00:45:08,831 I ain't got none. 584 00:45:09,290 --> 00:45:10,290 Honest. 585 00:45:12,043 --> 00:45:13,961 Well there's a false back on it 586 00:45:14,128 --> 00:45:15,880 but-but there isn't all I said there was. 587 00:45:16,505 --> 00:45:19,008 I had to sell most of it before I left the states. 588 00:45:21,844 --> 00:45:23,554 Perhaps you should cast your mind back 589 00:45:23,763 --> 00:45:25,431 to what happened last night. 590 00:45:27,141 --> 00:45:28,434 Oh my god! 591 00:45:28,935 --> 00:45:29,935 Please miss Lorraine 592 00:45:30,478 --> 00:45:31,478 your robe. 593 00:45:43,574 --> 00:45:45,493 I don't think we'll really be needing that. 594 00:45:48,037 --> 00:45:49,080 Now for the hard part. 595 00:46:07,556 --> 00:46:09,600 Oh... damn it. 596 00:47:11,245 --> 00:47:12,246 How many does that make? 597 00:47:13,164 --> 00:47:14,164 I think it's my round. 598 00:47:36,479 --> 00:47:37,479 Round one. 599 00:47:48,866 --> 00:47:50,075 [Glasses clink, 600 00:47:54,663 --> 00:47:55,664 Hey what's the time? 601 00:49:36,056 --> 00:49:37,098 One more for the road, eh? 602 00:49:39,351 --> 00:49:40,394 Same again please. 603 00:49:42,313 --> 00:49:43,313 I'm sorry, sir. 604 00:49:44,190 --> 00:49:45,315 It's gone closing time. 605 00:51:03,477 --> 00:51:04,561 Guy Hammond: So drunk! 606 00:51:05,646 --> 00:51:07,230 Oh I can't believe it. 607 00:51:07,231 --> 00:51:08,231 Such good times. 608 00:51:08,524 --> 00:51:12,111 She must have had a plank across his burn or something. 609 00:51:14,572 --> 00:51:15,613 Where are you going? 610 00:51:15,614 --> 00:51:16,614 Oh! 611 00:51:17,491 --> 00:51:18,576 He's one of us. 612 00:51:19,118 --> 00:51:20,286 This is one of us. 613 00:51:21,161 --> 00:51:22,841 Come on, I know this little place we can... 614 00:51:23,664 --> 00:51:24,664 We can go. 615 00:51:27,001 --> 00:51:28,002 Hold on though. 616 00:51:36,427 --> 00:51:37,594 We can drink all night. 617 00:51:42,391 --> 00:51:43,751 Doorman: They're all topless here. 618 00:51:43,809 --> 00:51:46,020 Bottomless, pit-less, everything here. 619 00:51:46,312 --> 00:51:47,980 Everything's less, the price as well. 620 00:51:48,188 --> 00:51:49,607 Come on 18 of them. 621 00:51:49,857 --> 00:51:51,483 They're all naked and they dance. 622 00:51:51,859 --> 00:51:53,151 You can have a look inside. 623 00:51:53,152 --> 00:51:55,272 Come on don't cost you anything 'till you get right in 624 00:51:55,738 --> 00:51:57,656 then it's a nicker and you see 18. 625 00:51:58,866 --> 00:51:59,866 Here y'are 626 00:52:00,117 --> 00:52:02,536 18 beautiful birds here all naked 627 00:52:02,703 --> 00:52:03,704 and they dance. 628 00:52:04,079 --> 00:52:05,873 Non-stop titillation for a nicker. 629 00:52:06,165 --> 00:52:07,485 Come and have a look, here y'are. 630 00:52:07,875 --> 00:52:08,875 Only a nicker. 631 00:52:09,084 --> 00:52:10,502 Non-stop titillation. 632 00:52:11,462 --> 00:52:13,542 Hey, I'll bring smiler in here that'll get him right. 633 00:52:14,173 --> 00:52:15,173 Go on in there. 634 00:52:15,299 --> 00:52:17,843 Here y'are, 18 beautiful birds in here. 635 00:52:43,911 --> 00:52:45,579 Ah look at that! 636 00:52:50,751 --> 00:52:52,169 Oh I like it. 637 00:52:52,544 --> 00:52:53,754 Let's get a seat in here eh? 638 00:52:55,089 --> 00:52:57,758 Oh yes, yes, more, more, more, more, more. 639 00:52:58,342 --> 00:52:59,843 Come on, let's get in. 640 00:53:00,094 --> 00:53:01,135 Oh! 641 00:53:02,513 --> 00:53:03,513 Come on let's sit down. 642 00:53:04,473 --> 00:53:06,433 Oh cheeky! 643 00:53:18,195 --> 00:53:19,655 Oi, pack it in. 644 00:53:19,863 --> 00:53:21,115 Let's have a look. More! 645 00:53:25,786 --> 00:53:27,746 Cheeky! Cheeky! 646 00:53:35,003 --> 00:53:36,088 Oh, I like it. 647 00:53:36,880 --> 00:53:37,880 Yeay! 648 00:53:38,757 --> 00:53:40,259 Come over to my place. 649 00:53:48,058 --> 00:53:49,058 I want tits. 650 00:53:53,647 --> 00:53:54,648 Where's he going? 651 00:54:02,197 --> 00:54:05,451 More, more, more, more! 652 00:54:22,301 --> 00:54:23,969 Go on smiler get home out the cold. 653 00:54:24,470 --> 00:54:26,513 Our 18 beautiful birds. 654 00:54:27,681 --> 00:54:28,682 Seven. 655 00:54:29,850 --> 00:54:31,602 Seven times. 656 00:54:33,061 --> 00:54:36,774 Seven times without a break for a drink even. 657 00:54:37,274 --> 00:54:40,485 Miss Lorraine, I've already heard that story, thank you. 658 00:54:40,486 --> 00:54:42,905 All day yesterday and the day before. 659 00:54:43,071 --> 00:54:44,990 Well, how come when it only happened... 660 00:54:46,366 --> 00:54:47,743 Oh, yeah, I forgot. 661 00:54:48,285 --> 00:54:49,328 Silly of me. 662 00:54:49,787 --> 00:54:52,998 It's the shock it makes me lose all sense of time. 663 00:54:54,166 --> 00:54:57,294 I guess you could call it a delayed reaction, you know? 664 00:54:57,753 --> 00:54:59,671 We were talking about your insurance 665 00:55:00,214 --> 00:55:02,841 and I've already spoken to customs and according to them, 666 00:55:03,467 --> 00:55:06,469 the jewels you claim were stolen never entered the country. 667 00:55:06,470 --> 00:55:09,765 Listen, babe, why don't we leave this 'till some other time? 668 00:55:09,973 --> 00:55:11,934 Jezebel's tired right now. 669 00:55:12,893 --> 00:55:15,979 That business about the jewels, it's all genuine stuff 670 00:55:16,146 --> 00:55:18,607 but she needs time to work it... to recover. 671 00:55:19,441 --> 00:55:21,652 The way he raped me like that. 672 00:55:22,444 --> 00:55:24,947 He just never stopped. 673 00:55:25,614 --> 00:55:27,658 It was awful, you can't imagine. 674 00:55:28,826 --> 00:55:31,537 He was so young and strong. 675 00:55:32,329 --> 00:55:33,789 Oh it was awful. 676 00:55:34,164 --> 00:55:37,834 Call it women's intuition if you like, but it's certainly a possible reason why 677 00:55:37,835 --> 00:55:40,254 all the descriptions of the burglar differ from one another. 678 00:55:42,548 --> 00:55:44,383 Well, it's better than being a gang, isn't it? 679 00:55:46,009 --> 00:55:48,053 Well, all the victims were women, remember? 680 00:55:50,055 --> 00:55:51,974 Yeah, okay, I'll be right over. 681 00:56:01,066 --> 00:56:02,984 Judy Marvin: Guy! What are you doing here? 682 00:56:02,985 --> 00:56:06,028 Oh, hello, I was just looking for something I left here last night. 683 00:56:06,029 --> 00:56:07,780 - Is it important? - Yes, it is. 684 00:56:07,781 --> 00:56:10,450 Listen, I want you to come with me to see inspector Smith. 685 00:56:11,493 --> 00:56:12,493 But I'm innocent. 686 00:56:12,619 --> 00:56:14,013 I didn't know what was in that envelope. 687 00:56:14,037 --> 00:56:15,621 It was handed to me by a complete stranger. 688 00:56:15,622 --> 00:56:17,874 Guy, I don't know what you're talking about, 689 00:56:17,875 --> 00:56:19,435 but the inspector and I need your help. 690 00:56:19,877 --> 00:56:20,669 You do? 691 00:56:20,669 --> 00:56:21,669 What for? 692 00:56:21,753 --> 00:56:22,753 To catch a cat. 693 00:56:23,213 --> 00:56:24,589 - What? - Cat burglar, come on. 694 00:56:24,590 --> 00:56:26,133 A cat burglar? 695 00:56:27,217 --> 00:56:28,737 All right, Judy, assuming you're right 696 00:56:28,802 --> 00:56:31,680 and all his victims deliberately lied because he seduced them. 697 00:56:32,014 --> 00:56:33,557 All we can do is to um 698 00:56:33,891 --> 00:56:36,731 revisit the complainants and try to wring a confession from one of them. 699 00:56:47,404 --> 00:56:50,824 What we need is some kind of plan where we can catch the burglar in the act. 700 00:56:51,116 --> 00:56:52,117 Which act? 701 00:56:52,492 --> 00:56:54,368 Guy we'll need newspaper coverage. 702 00:56:54,369 --> 00:56:55,454 That'il be your department. 703 00:56:55,829 --> 00:56:57,164 As for the bait leave that to me. 704 00:56:57,664 --> 00:56:59,144 You'll come with me, Robert, alright? 705 00:56:59,541 --> 00:57:00,917 Oh, yes, yes, yes, of course. 706 00:57:03,378 --> 00:57:04,379 Where? 707 00:57:07,799 --> 00:57:09,217 It's an unusual request, 708 00:57:09,468 --> 00:57:12,429 but naturally, inspector, I'll only be too pleased to cooperate. 709 00:57:13,180 --> 00:57:16,141 Although I do suggest we take a few special precautions. 710 00:57:16,558 --> 00:57:18,644 After all, we don't want any little mishaps, do we? 711 00:57:19,227 --> 00:57:20,270 Do you have any ideas? 712 00:57:27,110 --> 00:57:28,862 £6,000. 713 00:57:29,988 --> 00:57:31,697 50... 7,000. 714 00:57:31,698 --> 00:57:32,699 8000. 715 00:57:33,116 --> 00:57:35,160 9,000 and 20. 716 00:57:36,036 --> 00:57:37,663 £9,500. 717 00:57:38,288 --> 00:57:39,664 £9,500. 718 00:57:40,791 --> 00:57:42,834 Wilson and Tate and sudlow 719 00:57:45,796 --> 00:57:49,091 And now we come to lot 36, 720 00:57:49,466 --> 00:57:53,595 an emerald and diamond necklace created in 1831 721 00:57:54,179 --> 00:57:57,265 for the diamond jubilee celebration of the crown prince of Poland. 722 00:57:57,808 --> 00:58:00,352 Specially made for his German mistress, 723 00:58:00,602 --> 00:58:03,063 Helga from gotterdammerung. The piece contains 724 00:58:03,480 --> 00:58:08,110 327 smaller emeralds, the centrepiece being the famous 725 00:58:08,485 --> 00:58:14,950 16 carat waleska diamond, which was added to the necklace in 1903. 726 00:58:16,034 --> 00:58:19,746 The bidding will commence at £50,000. 727 00:58:21,873 --> 00:58:23,959 £50,000. 728 00:58:25,419 --> 00:58:27,087 And five, 60, 729 00:58:28,005 --> 00:58:30,966 70, 80, 90, 730 00:58:31,717 --> 00:58:34,428 100, £100,000. 731 00:58:36,847 --> 00:58:37,847 Ten. 732 00:58:40,934 --> 00:58:43,020 30, 40. 733 00:58:43,311 --> 00:58:45,647 £150,000. 734 00:58:45,814 --> 00:58:47,524 £150,000. 735 00:58:50,485 --> 00:58:51,694 And ten, 736 00:58:51,695 --> 00:58:53,488 £160,000. 737 00:58:59,995 --> 00:59:01,038 And five. 738 00:59:09,379 --> 00:59:10,379 And five. 739 00:59:10,964 --> 00:59:12,799 £195,000. 740 00:59:15,927 --> 00:59:17,345 Do I hear any other bids? 741 00:59:19,097 --> 00:59:22,809 £195,000. 742 00:59:24,478 --> 00:59:26,897 The second row, lady in the fur coat. 743 00:59:45,332 --> 00:59:46,416 Can't stay long. 744 00:59:47,042 --> 00:59:50,122 Got to write up a piece about the auction, so it'll make the evening editions. 745 00:59:50,420 --> 00:59:51,980 Everything went according to plan then? 746 00:59:52,422 --> 00:59:54,424 195,000 it ended up at. 747 00:59:54,800 --> 00:59:57,969 That's not bad for a piece of paste or glass or whatever you call it. 748 00:59:58,720 --> 01:00:00,805 Do you know, I could see the auctioneers face 749 01:00:00,806 --> 01:00:02,446 getting worried as the price kept going up 750 01:00:02,641 --> 01:00:04,994 but Judy just kept bidding higher and higher until she got it. 751 01:00:05,018 --> 01:00:06,618 Sergeant plinth: Yeah? Where's Judy now? 752 01:00:06,812 --> 01:00:09,665 Guy Hammond: She's gone on a shopping spree, hoping the thief will follow her. 753 01:00:09,689 --> 01:00:10,649 Christ! 754 01:00:10,650 --> 01:00:12,810 I hope she doesn't lose him and cock-up the whole case. 755 01:00:13,193 --> 01:00:14,193 Which reminds me. 756 01:00:22,911 --> 01:00:24,271 Seized them at customs last night. 757 01:00:24,913 --> 01:00:26,473 Seen a couple of them, they're not bad. 758 01:00:27,207 --> 01:00:28,792 Oh, wow. 759 01:00:29,960 --> 01:00:31,752 Should be able to flog this lot easily enough. 760 01:00:31,753 --> 01:00:34,153 Yeah, well don't lose this little lot like you lost the last. 761 01:00:38,552 --> 01:00:39,594 Have you been served? 762 01:00:40,011 --> 01:00:41,054 Lemon tea, please. 763 01:00:43,265 --> 01:00:45,505 Cor, I wouldn't mind those for breakfast, I can tell you. 764 01:01:14,504 --> 01:01:16,104 I had a friend who was a cameraman once. 765 01:01:16,798 --> 01:01:20,509 I asked him about those shots, you know, those shots when they get right up 766 01:01:21,803 --> 01:01:22,888 Anything else? 767 01:01:26,766 --> 01:01:29,060 Anyway, I'll have no trouble getting rid of that lot. 768 01:01:29,936 --> 01:01:31,056 This Danish stuff, you know, 769 01:01:31,771 --> 01:01:34,232 it's really good, I mean, it's... it's refined. 770 01:01:35,025 --> 01:01:37,819 I mean, they give a minge class, don't they? 771 01:02:19,361 --> 01:02:21,672 I wish you could remember where you left that bloody envelope! 772 01:02:21,696 --> 01:02:24,157 Look I tried the hotel, nobody had handed it in. 773 01:02:24,324 --> 01:02:25,524 Well they wouldn't would they? 774 01:02:25,825 --> 01:02:27,576 I mean supposing someone takes a look inside 775 01:02:27,577 --> 01:02:29,777 and then goes straight to the police, then what happens? 776 01:02:29,829 --> 01:02:31,389 Then we'll get it back again, won't we? 777 01:02:31,665 --> 01:02:33,499 Well, as long as no one recognises it at the yard, 778 01:02:33,500 --> 01:02:35,220 or I'll really be in for it if that happens. 779 01:03:03,697 --> 01:03:05,072 I suppose you realise 780 01:03:05,073 --> 01:03:08,313 you've been parked on a double yellow line for the past three quarters of an hour. 781 01:03:09,619 --> 01:03:10,619 Oh, really? 782 01:03:11,037 --> 01:03:12,038 I've been watching you. 783 01:03:12,497 --> 01:03:13,956 I would have thought a pretty girl like you 784 01:03:13,957 --> 01:03:16,238 would have had something much better to do with your time. 785 01:03:22,257 --> 01:03:23,257 Right then. 786 01:03:23,508 --> 01:03:25,228 I'll get that thing in before it's too late. 787 01:03:25,844 --> 01:03:27,780 Then I'll see about getting rid of that little lot. 788 01:03:27,804 --> 01:03:30,682 You know, if they're good, should get a fair price for them. 789 01:03:59,961 --> 01:04:01,588 Oh, ouch my leg! 790 01:04:35,538 --> 01:04:38,248 Cor blimey, it's someone's prick! 791 01:05:17,539 --> 01:05:18,540 How did it go? Alright? 792 01:05:18,748 --> 01:05:19,748 Perfectly. 793 01:05:20,083 --> 01:05:24,045 Now, as long as guy does his part okay, we should get results and soon. 794 01:05:25,088 --> 01:05:26,631 Judy, I'm... I'm worried. 795 01:05:26,798 --> 01:05:27,798 Why? 796 01:05:28,258 --> 01:05:31,427 Well, the idea of using a bait to attract this thief is one thing 797 01:05:31,428 --> 01:05:35,223 but leaving you alone in this house, well that's too much. 798 01:05:35,932 --> 01:05:37,692 I mean, supposing your assumption is correct. 799 01:05:38,017 --> 01:05:39,457 Supposing he does fall for the bait. 800 01:05:40,437 --> 01:05:41,479 And breaks in tonight 801 01:05:41,896 --> 01:05:43,857 or tomorrow after he's read about the auction. 802 01:05:44,149 --> 01:05:45,775 Well, what can we lose 803 01:05:46,151 --> 01:05:47,318 even if something goes wrong? 804 01:05:47,819 --> 01:05:49,571 A phoney necklace that isn't worth a cent. 805 01:05:50,196 --> 01:05:51,836 It wasn't the necklace I was thinking of. 806 01:05:53,241 --> 01:05:54,242 I was thinking of you. 807 01:05:58,371 --> 01:06:00,414 I know I'm only an inspector at new Scotland yard 808 01:06:00,415 --> 01:06:02,749 and my name isn't anything more than plain Smith, 809 01:06:02,750 --> 01:06:05,003 which isn't much to offer anybody, I must admit, 810 01:06:06,421 --> 01:06:10,508 but I may be just another ordinary kind of person, but I do get very concerned about 811 01:06:11,676 --> 01:06:14,970 you and it worries me because I think you're just about 812 01:06:14,971 --> 01:06:17,974 the most wonderful insurance investigator I've ever met and uh... 813 01:06:18,433 --> 01:06:20,685 If anything happened to you, I-I don't know what I'd do 814 01:06:21,603 --> 01:06:24,898 you know, because I think you're so um... nice and uh 815 01:06:25,815 --> 01:06:27,358 well you're a wonderful girl, Judy. 816 01:06:27,609 --> 01:06:31,196 At least I think you're wonderful and... 817 01:06:31,362 --> 01:06:32,362 Rape me. 818 01:06:33,781 --> 01:06:34,866 I beg your pardon? 819 01:06:35,158 --> 01:06:36,158 Rape me. 820 01:06:37,619 --> 01:06:38,786 Well you know what rape is? 821 01:06:40,371 --> 01:06:41,371 Well yes, it's um... 822 01:06:42,332 --> 01:06:43,708 Rape, uh yes, yes. 823 01:06:43,917 --> 01:06:47,420 Well, if you're so worried about me being raped by this burglar, you do it. 824 01:06:49,380 --> 01:06:51,966 Oh, for god's sake, Robert, will you please rape me? 825 01:06:53,218 --> 01:06:54,968 Look I'm not very good at these sort of things. 826 01:06:54,969 --> 01:06:56,053 Robert! 827 01:06:56,054 --> 01:06:57,137 You know, I was educated 828 01:06:57,138 --> 01:07:00,517 at the kind of school where we didn't get much opportunity to um... 829 01:07:01,392 --> 01:07:03,853 Uh, get much practise at uh... 830 01:07:18,701 --> 01:07:19,861 You shouldn't have done that. 831 01:07:20,453 --> 01:07:22,213 You should never do that to a police officer. 832 01:07:22,330 --> 01:07:23,872 Remember, we're all trained in unarmed combat. 833 01:07:23,873 --> 01:07:25,999 It's a... it's a compete instinct to anyone in the force. 834 01:07:26,000 --> 01:07:27,640 Well, your instincts are a bit slow then. 835 01:07:28,044 --> 01:07:30,837 I may look mild, but when I want to be I can get really rough. 836 01:07:30,838 --> 01:07:31,965 Alright, go for me again. 837 01:07:32,423 --> 01:07:33,675 I don't want to hurt you. 838 01:07:33,841 --> 01:07:34,841 You won't. 839 01:07:35,009 --> 01:07:36,677 I might forget myself and... 840 01:07:36,678 --> 01:07:38,262 Look just go for me again, will you? 841 01:07:38,263 --> 01:07:39,983 Now go for me as if you're going to rape me. 842 01:07:52,235 --> 01:07:53,277 Woah! 843 01:07:56,531 --> 01:07:57,531 Oh my god! 844 01:08:08,293 --> 01:08:09,419 Still worried about tonight? 845 01:08:13,840 --> 01:08:14,840 By the way, 846 01:08:15,091 --> 01:08:18,386 didn't like to mention it at the time, but I'm also a black belt at karate. 847 01:09:55,066 --> 01:09:56,066 You're late back. 848 01:10:05,076 --> 01:10:06,076 Feeling better? 849 01:10:07,245 --> 01:10:08,705 There's something wrong somewhere. 850 01:10:11,541 --> 01:10:12,583 Feels wrong. 851 01:10:13,000 --> 01:10:14,544 Having trouble with one of your plots? 852 01:10:15,670 --> 01:10:16,670 I'm just tired. 853 01:10:17,547 --> 01:10:18,589 Perhaps too tired. 854 01:10:19,048 --> 01:10:20,048 For what? 855 01:10:21,175 --> 01:10:23,010 To make an important decision. 856 01:10:23,803 --> 01:10:24,971 I'll get the stimulator. 857 01:10:25,596 --> 01:10:27,598 - What? - Just relax. 858 01:10:33,271 --> 01:10:34,855 It was really weird this afternoon. 859 01:10:34,856 --> 01:10:36,441 - Hmm? - I was walking along 860 01:10:36,774 --> 01:10:38,817 when suddenly this car hit this man 861 01:10:38,818 --> 01:10:40,737 carrying a suitcase, as he crossed the road. 862 01:10:41,362 --> 01:10:42,488 Well, he went up in the air 863 01:10:42,905 --> 01:10:46,492 and so did the suitcase and all the contents splattered out. 864 01:10:47,118 --> 01:10:48,411 And what do you think they were? 865 01:10:49,495 --> 01:10:50,496 Ladies underwear. 866 01:10:51,289 --> 01:10:52,998 No, blue movies. 867 01:10:55,251 --> 01:10:56,251 How's that? 868 01:10:57,462 --> 01:10:58,880 Mmm better. 869 01:10:59,464 --> 01:11:00,464 Just relax. 870 01:11:00,631 --> 01:11:01,631 Let yourself go limp. 871 01:11:01,966 --> 01:11:03,718 Don't worry I feel limp. 872 01:11:05,386 --> 01:11:07,946 Why don't we go upstairs, I could perform much better on the bed. 873 01:11:08,097 --> 01:11:10,433 Oh too much effort to go up the stairs. 874 01:11:11,434 --> 01:11:12,435 We'll be all right here. 875 01:14:10,821 --> 01:14:12,156 Grant Henry: Yes, who is it? 876 01:14:12,573 --> 01:14:14,867 It's me, jacobi, what the hell's going on in there? 877 01:14:15,117 --> 01:14:16,637 Grant Henry: Turn that damn thing off! 878 01:14:16,661 --> 01:14:18,746 Angie: Grant you can't stop now, let him wait. 879 01:14:19,497 --> 01:14:20,997 - Let who wait? - Grant Henry: Turn it off! 880 01:14:20,998 --> 01:14:22,666 I can't hear myself speak. 881 01:14:22,667 --> 01:14:23,834 I can't hear myself hear. 882 01:14:25,044 --> 01:14:27,128 Grant Henry: Jacobi's waiting on us now put it off. 883 01:14:27,129 --> 01:14:28,880 Angie: Jacobi can you hang on for a few minutes? 884 01:14:28,881 --> 01:14:30,840 - We're just in the middle of something. - Grant Henry: Don't be silly 885 01:14:30,841 --> 01:14:31,925 he can't stand out there when we're in the middle... 886 01:14:31,926 --> 01:14:33,677 Angie: Just a few minutes isn't going to hurt him. 887 01:14:33,678 --> 01:14:35,303 Grant Henry: Angie go and let him in. 888 01:14:35,304 --> 01:14:37,472 Angie: No you let him in, I can't, I'm not... 889 01:14:37,473 --> 01:14:39,368 Grant Henry: Oh for Christ's sake, neither can I, not with... 890 01:14:39,392 --> 01:14:41,310 Look, Grant, what is going on in there? 891 01:14:41,769 --> 01:14:43,104 Let me in, for god's sake. 892 01:14:49,902 --> 01:14:51,569 Jacobi: And about time too. 893 01:14:51,570 --> 01:14:52,904 Angie: What the hell do you want? 894 01:14:52,905 --> 01:14:55,573 Scotch and I'll pour it myself, now get lost Angie. 895 01:14:55,574 --> 01:14:56,616 Charming! 896 01:14:57,994 --> 01:15:00,162 The trouble with women is they're not self-sufficient. 897 01:15:00,871 --> 01:15:02,599 At least none of the ones that I've ever met. 898 01:15:02,623 --> 01:15:04,417 Yes, never mind about your sex life. 899 01:15:04,875 --> 01:15:06,795 Let's talk about your business life for a moment. 900 01:15:07,003 --> 01:15:08,004 Have you read the papers? 901 01:15:08,963 --> 01:15:09,963 Alright, I see you have. 902 01:15:10,172 --> 01:15:11,424 Now this mrs rothfellow 903 01:15:11,674 --> 01:15:12,716 did you see that she's... 904 01:15:12,717 --> 01:15:13,717 I'm ahead of you, jacobi. 905 01:15:14,969 --> 01:15:17,680 She keeps all herjewels in her safe in a house in Kensington. 906 01:15:18,472 --> 01:15:20,725 She goes to bed early and she lives alone. 907 01:15:21,934 --> 01:15:24,054 I found all this out this afternoon after the auction. 908 01:15:24,645 --> 01:15:26,272 The necklace looks very nice. 909 01:15:26,647 --> 01:15:27,773 She looks even better. 910 01:15:28,733 --> 01:15:31,211 The house looks as if it's wide open and waiting for me to go in. 911 01:15:31,235 --> 01:15:32,319 Which is what I don't like. 912 01:15:33,070 --> 01:15:36,073 I don't know it seems too easy, it smells wrong. 913 01:15:37,241 --> 01:15:39,201 What the hell are you talking about? 914 01:15:39,660 --> 01:15:41,078 Money, that's what it smells of. 915 01:15:41,746 --> 01:15:44,331 I can get 100 grand for the waleska diamond alone. 916 01:15:44,874 --> 01:15:47,460 Never mind what else she's got stashed away in that safe of hers. 917 01:15:48,002 --> 01:15:49,642 Well you read what she said in the papers. 918 01:15:49,712 --> 01:15:51,463 She doesn't trust banks. 919 01:15:51,464 --> 01:15:53,257 That means she's got it all there. 920 01:15:54,091 --> 01:15:56,260 Oh, come on, Grant you've got to do her. 921 01:15:56,927 --> 01:15:59,429 Look, we can all leave the country afterwards. 922 01:15:59,430 --> 01:16:00,639 Go away on a long vacation. 923 01:16:01,432 --> 01:16:03,552 What the hell with a hundred grand, we can all retire. 924 01:16:09,774 --> 01:16:12,443 Well, I could certainly do with a holiday. 925 01:16:12,943 --> 01:16:14,111 Right. Right. 926 01:16:14,737 --> 01:16:17,031 And I certainly have been overdoing it recently. 927 01:16:17,364 --> 01:16:18,364 Definitely. 928 01:16:19,075 --> 01:16:20,435 And it's only just after midnight. 929 01:16:22,495 --> 01:16:23,495 Angie love. 930 01:16:24,747 --> 01:16:26,307 I'm afraid I'm going to have to go out. 931 01:16:41,430 --> 01:16:43,056 What are you two doing here? 932 01:16:43,057 --> 01:16:44,516 Supposing the burglar sees you? 933 01:16:44,517 --> 01:16:47,077 The inspector insisted I call round to see if you were all right. 934 01:16:47,770 --> 01:16:50,810 Don't mind me, I'm just going to wire a couple of speakers up in the bedroom. 935 01:16:51,023 --> 01:16:52,816 So the second he touches the combination lock 936 01:16:52,817 --> 01:16:54,567 on the blooming safe, you'll be able to hear. 937 01:16:54,568 --> 01:16:56,728 That's if he hasn't been frightened off already by you. 938 01:16:57,363 --> 01:17:00,074 [Phone receiver clicks, sighs and dials 939 01:17:14,713 --> 01:17:17,925 I told you I'd be perfectly alright on my own, Robert. 940 01:17:18,509 --> 01:17:19,968 Now, will you please stop fussing 941 01:17:19,969 --> 01:17:22,179 and sending a sergeant round to check up on me? 942 01:17:24,515 --> 01:17:27,434 Well, of course he looks like a policeman, he's got those kind of feet. 943 01:17:28,936 --> 01:17:31,564 If I need any help, I'll call you, alright? 944 01:17:34,358 --> 01:17:35,900 Look, it's after midnight. 945 01:17:35,901 --> 01:17:37,694 I don't know what guy's doing upstairs. 946 01:17:37,695 --> 01:17:39,404 Wiring up some speakers, so you'll know when... 947 01:17:39,405 --> 01:17:40,406 Right then. 948 01:17:41,198 --> 01:17:43,176 - We'i| leave you in peace. - All finished up there? 949 01:17:43,200 --> 01:17:44,201 Yeah, don't worry. 950 01:17:44,368 --> 01:17:46,088 The second anything happens, it'll start up. 951 01:17:46,370 --> 01:17:48,010 Of course, I could always disguise myself. 952 01:17:48,038 --> 01:17:49,165 I do a very good postman. 953 01:17:49,456 --> 01:17:51,125 At one o'clock in the morning? 954 01:18:04,597 --> 01:18:05,597 Here. 955 01:18:06,932 --> 01:18:08,252 I know that fella from somewhere. 956 01:18:08,893 --> 01:18:10,853 No one I know and I never forget a face. 957 01:18:11,312 --> 01:18:13,512 Well, we're especially trained to remember them you see. 958 01:18:13,898 --> 01:18:16,107 I could swear I've seen him somewhere and recently too. 959 01:18:16,108 --> 01:18:17,748 Now if he'd got big tits I'd remember him 960 01:18:17,776 --> 01:18:19,136 even if I'd never seen him before. 961 01:18:19,695 --> 01:18:21,071 Thighs mate, that's what's best. 962 01:18:21,488 --> 01:18:24,158 Great big, juicy thighs and lovely squeezy bums. 963 01:18:24,366 --> 01:18:26,243 No, give me a pair of tits any day. 964 01:18:26,410 --> 01:18:27,536 They wouldn't suit you dear! 965 01:18:28,495 --> 01:18:30,206 - Great big ones. - Thighs. 966 01:18:31,123 --> 01:18:32,583 - Tits. - Thighs. 967 01:18:32,791 --> 01:18:34,251 - Tits. - Arses. 968 01:18:34,835 --> 01:18:36,378 - Tits. - Bollocks. 969 01:20:36,790 --> 01:20:38,791 Why don't you try three to the right, 970 01:20:38,792 --> 01:20:40,794 two to the left, and one to the right again? 971 01:21:10,741 --> 01:21:12,618 Sorry, that's all there is in there. 972 01:21:15,079 --> 01:21:16,205 Well now, mrs rothfellow 973 01:21:17,331 --> 01:21:18,411 where do you keep the rest? 974 01:21:21,001 --> 01:21:22,001 In your bedroom? 975 01:21:22,544 --> 01:21:24,588 Oh, there's nothing up there, I assure you. 976 01:21:24,880 --> 01:21:27,161 But you're welcome to have a look while I call the police. 977 01:21:29,510 --> 01:21:31,261 This looks cheap compared to your beauty. 978 01:21:32,262 --> 01:21:34,306 And you are very beautiful. 979 01:21:34,473 --> 01:21:37,642 I know all about your techniques with the ladies, you burgle. 980 01:21:37,643 --> 01:21:38,644 Uh-huh. 981 01:21:39,269 --> 01:21:41,146 So there's really no need. 982 01:21:43,190 --> 01:21:44,190 You needn't bother. 983 01:21:45,275 --> 01:21:46,777 Just to set the record straight 984 01:21:47,277 --> 01:21:48,445 my name's Judy Marvin. 985 01:21:48,612 --> 01:21:50,030 I'm an insurance investigator 986 01:21:50,489 --> 01:21:54,618 and this entire evening has been an elaborate charade in order to bait you. 987 01:21:55,160 --> 01:21:56,619 Because you've nearly cost me my job 988 01:21:56,620 --> 01:21:58,540 the way you've been going on the last few months. 989 01:21:59,623 --> 01:22:03,794 And I sincerely hope that you don't compare me to this little trinket. 990 01:22:04,670 --> 01:22:07,214 It's only a bit of paste and glass run up for the occasion. 991 01:22:17,724 --> 01:22:18,976 Aargh! 992 01:22:22,646 --> 01:22:24,565 Let's go. 993 01:22:33,657 --> 01:22:34,992 Huh, 0h. 994 01:22:35,367 --> 01:22:36,577 Grant Henry! 995 01:22:37,411 --> 01:22:38,411 How do you do? 996 01:22:38,871 --> 01:22:40,664 I was reading one of your books upstairs. 997 01:22:40,831 --> 01:22:41,831 Oh did you like it? 998 01:22:43,417 --> 01:22:45,937 Well now you know why I have to make my living as a Jewel thief. 999 01:22:46,044 --> 01:22:48,297 Yeah not just a Jewel thief, I might add. 1000 01:22:48,505 --> 01:22:51,884 I think it's high time you had a taste of your own medicine. 1001 01:25:44,598 --> 01:25:45,598 Who are you calling? 1002 01:25:46,224 --> 01:25:47,224 Inspector Smith. 1003 01:25:48,310 --> 01:25:49,390 What are you talking about? 1004 01:25:49,978 --> 01:25:51,437 You're not going to turn me in after... of course. 1005 01:25:51,438 --> 01:25:52,480 What did you expect? 1006 01:25:52,481 --> 01:25:54,483 That I was all weak and helpless, like the others. 1007 01:25:54,816 --> 01:25:56,151 Look, just because you screwed me 1008 01:25:56,318 --> 01:25:58,528 doesn't alter the fact that you just tried to burgle me. 1009 01:25:58,695 --> 01:25:59,904 - Bloody hell! - And if you don't 1010 01:25:59,905 --> 01:26:02,783 want to be permanently damaged, you'd better shut up. 1011 01:26:18,840 --> 01:26:19,841 Hello Robert? 1012 01:26:20,967 --> 01:26:21,967 Yes, it's me. 1013 01:26:23,261 --> 01:26:24,262 I'm fine. 1014 01:26:25,722 --> 01:26:26,722 He's right here. 1015 01:26:27,849 --> 01:26:28,850 Yes, right beside me. 1016 01:26:29,184 --> 01:26:30,304 Do you want a word with him? 1017 01:26:30,852 --> 01:26:31,852 Right. 1018 01:26:33,146 --> 01:26:35,565 No I told you I'm fine. 1019 01:26:37,109 --> 01:26:38,192 See you in a bit. 1020 01:26:38,193 --> 01:26:39,903 Oh, by the way, there's no need to hurry. 1021 01:26:40,696 --> 01:26:41,988 I've got him under control. 1022 01:26:47,202 --> 01:26:49,830 I estimate that should give us just enough time. 1023 01:26:50,455 --> 01:26:51,706 But you better make it a good one, 1024 01:26:51,707 --> 01:26:53,947 because it's going to be the last you'll get for a while. 1025 01:27:03,885 --> 01:27:06,304 You know Judy, you really are quite a girl. 1026 01:27:06,847 --> 01:27:08,932 There's plenty to be said in your favour as well. 1027 01:27:09,850 --> 01:27:11,490 God knows how long they'll put me away for 1028 01:27:12,144 --> 01:27:13,145 but when I get out 1029 01:27:13,729 --> 01:27:14,889 how about teaming up with me? 1030 01:27:16,773 --> 01:27:17,773 I mean just think, 1031 01:27:18,525 --> 01:27:21,069 with my skill, your contacts 1032 01:27:21,486 --> 01:27:22,486 we could make a fortune. 1033 01:27:25,490 --> 01:27:28,410 We'd certainly make a pretty formidable team, I must admit. 1034 01:27:30,078 --> 01:27:31,455 I've got a crummy boss anyway. 1035 01:27:33,248 --> 01:27:34,528 Grant Henry: How about it, then? 1036 01:27:35,041 --> 01:27:36,041 Is it a deal? 1037 01:27:37,502 --> 01:27:39,880 I'd even be willing to offer marriage if you were willing. 1038 01:27:40,797 --> 01:27:43,437 And I can assure you, you're the first girl I've ever said that to. 1039 01:27:47,471 --> 01:27:49,306 All right, you're on. 1040 01:27:58,398 --> 01:27:59,983 I told him not to hurry, too. 1041 01:28:01,401 --> 01:28:03,195 I'm going to want to see you again but... 1042 01:28:03,528 --> 01:28:05,405 About six months, I should imagine. 1043 01:28:07,324 --> 01:28:10,075 Well, I don't suppose any of your other victims will dare 1044 01:28:10,076 --> 01:28:12,746 give evidence against you so, that leaves just me. 1045 01:28:14,080 --> 01:28:16,958 And what can they convict you of other than simple house break-in? 1046 01:28:17,751 --> 01:28:18,793 What do you mean? 1047 01:28:18,794 --> 01:28:20,420 Well, you haven't stolen anything. 1048 01:28:20,712 --> 01:28:22,379 Nobody can prove you're the Jewel thief 1049 01:28:22,380 --> 01:28:23,924 without evidence or witnesses. 1050 01:28:24,883 --> 01:28:27,218 And by the time I've said my little piece in court, 1051 01:28:27,219 --> 01:28:29,299 I should think they'll let you off with a small fine. 1052 01:28:44,736 --> 01:28:45,736 Imagine it. 1053 01:28:46,112 --> 01:28:47,781 Grant Henry, the Jewel thief. 1054 01:28:49,157 --> 01:28:51,575 Well, you certainly got yourself a story there, haven't you guy? 1055 01:28:51,576 --> 01:28:52,994 Indeed I have, inspector. 1056 01:28:53,829 --> 01:28:57,040 Listen, I think I'll just whip upstairs and dismantle the equipment, 1057 01:28:57,207 --> 01:28:58,527 you know the speakers and things. 1058 01:28:59,125 --> 01:29:00,765 Oh leave that for a couple of my men to do 1059 01:29:01,419 --> 01:29:02,670 saves bothering you. 1060 01:29:02,671 --> 01:29:04,271 Oh no, it's no bother, no bother at all. 1061 01:29:05,841 --> 01:29:09,052 Of course, they'll still have to prove he's the Jewel thief, won't they? 1062 01:29:10,053 --> 01:29:11,513 I mean, it won't be so easy. 1063 01:29:11,888 --> 01:29:13,368 Well, that's somebody else's problem. 1064 01:29:13,849 --> 01:29:15,099 At least we brought him in 1065 01:29:15,100 --> 01:29:17,260 and as far as I'm concerned, that's all there is to it. 1066 01:29:18,061 --> 01:29:19,729 Whatever happens next, I don't care. 1067 01:29:21,147 --> 01:29:23,147 Looks like everything turned out rather well, then. 1068 01:29:25,068 --> 01:29:27,946 There's just one question of um 1069 01:29:29,155 --> 01:29:31,032 us, j-Judy. 1070 01:29:34,828 --> 01:29:35,828 Sergeant plinth. 1071 01:29:36,746 --> 01:29:37,706 Uh, could you um? 1072 01:29:37,707 --> 01:29:38,987 Yes sir, did you want something? 1073 01:29:40,750 --> 01:29:42,586 Just make sure everything's all right outside. 1074 01:29:51,928 --> 01:29:53,138 - Judy. - Yes Robert? 1075 01:29:54,431 --> 01:29:56,433 Judy, I find you very attractive, you know that? 1076 01:29:57,100 --> 01:29:58,100 Thank you, Robert. 1077 01:29:58,310 --> 01:30:00,353 As for the way you captured the thief, well 1078 01:30:01,187 --> 01:30:02,772 I think you're just wonderful and uh... 1079 01:30:03,982 --> 01:30:05,858 I wondered if it'd be asking too much 1080 01:30:05,859 --> 01:30:10,113 if I were to ask you if you wouldn't mind if I asked you 1081 01:30:13,658 --> 01:30:14,658 to marry me? 1082 01:30:15,452 --> 01:30:16,452 Of course not. 1083 01:30:17,662 --> 01:30:19,581 I'm-I'm sorry I didn't quite get that 1084 01:30:19,789 --> 01:30:21,166 um, what you said. 1085 01:30:21,625 --> 01:30:22,626 I said, of course not. 1086 01:30:24,127 --> 01:30:25,503 And I'm sorry I still, um... 1087 01:30:26,379 --> 01:30:27,523 Am not quite sure whether you... 1088 01:30:27,547 --> 01:30:29,107 I'm not actually sure whether you mean, 1089 01:30:29,466 --> 01:30:31,635 yes uh, or no? 1090 01:30:33,011 --> 01:30:35,679 I mean, of course I don't mind you asking me to marry you 1091 01:30:35,680 --> 01:30:36,848 and I'd love to accept, 1092 01:30:37,682 --> 01:30:40,769 but I've just recently got myself engaged to someone else, actually. 1093 01:30:41,519 --> 01:30:42,896 Very recently, in fact. 1094 01:30:47,233 --> 01:30:48,513 Everything's fine out there sir. 1095 01:30:50,820 --> 01:30:52,864 Right well we'll be on our way then. 1096 01:30:54,532 --> 01:30:57,786 Uh if you should, you know change your mind or 1097 01:30:58,286 --> 01:31:00,371 if he should change his mind, you know, 1098 01:31:00,372 --> 01:31:02,958 whoever he is, then, you know, perhaps you'll give me a call. 1099 01:31:07,212 --> 01:31:09,047 I'll just go and give guy a hand upstairs sir. 1100 01:31:15,887 --> 01:31:17,472 Can't wait to see what he's like. 1101 01:31:17,806 --> 01:31:20,140 I mean, he must have been bloody good to keep all those women quiet. 1102 01:31:20,141 --> 01:31:21,141 Never mind that. 1103 01:31:21,434 --> 01:31:23,914 Just think of the money we're going to get flogging the prints. 1104 01:31:24,145 --> 01:31:26,185 I hope they kept the light on while they were at it. 80656

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