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(whimsical music)
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(lively orchestral music)
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(intense orchestral music)
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(lively orchestral music)
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(ship horn blowing)
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(people cheering)
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(bright orchestral music)
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♪ Lu-lu-lu-lu, lu-lu-lu-lu, lu-lu-lu-lu ♪
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♪ I'm in love ♪
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♪ La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪
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♪ From above ♪
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♪ I hear blue birds sing new words ♪
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♪ So clear and strong ♪
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♪ Enraptured, I'm captured by love's sweet song ♪
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♪ Lu-lu-lu-lu, lu-lu-lu-lu, lu-lu-lu-lu ♪
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♪ I'm in love ♪
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Now then, just dissolve this in an alcoholic drink
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and take it down.
19
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You mean to say that this pill
20
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is going to help me become a father?
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I have every reason to believe it will.
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Wow, what's in it?
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Well, let us just say it will accomplish the purpose.
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Immediately afterwards however,
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a temporary state of amnesia may occur.
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Oh, amnesia?
27
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Oh, there's nothing to worry about.
28
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Oh, thank you, doctor.
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You're very welcome. Bye.
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Patient Jeffery Brooks, professional writer.
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Traveling on world cruise with his wife Sandra.
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Couple married four years, no children.
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Patient has symptoms of extreme tension and anxiety
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caused by a current infertility.
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Normal in all other respects.
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Prescribed five grains of salicylic acid,
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telling patient it would produce great excitement
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accompanied by complete freedom
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from anxiety and inhibitions.
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A simple experiment in the power of suggestion.
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Patient is of course unaware
42
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that the dosage is an aspirin tablet.
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It will be interesting to see what happens.
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Sandy.
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I'll be out in just a minute, Jeff.
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(sultry music)
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Hi, honey.
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Uh, Sandy.
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Do you want something, honey?
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No, it's all right.
51
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(sultry music)
52
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Here I am, honey.
53
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Hi, sweetheart, I was just having a drink. Join me?
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Oh, no thanks, it's not five yet.
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(sultry music)
56
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What are you doing, honey?
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I, uh, just thought it might be a little cozier like this.
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(Jeff humming)
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You know, you know Jeff, you look so strange.
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I do?
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I don't feel strange.
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I don't feel anything.
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(sultry music)
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Sandy, you look gorgeous.
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Oh, honey, thank you.
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What are you doing?
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Jeff.
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You're trying too hard, darling. This isn't necessary.
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Honey?
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(horn blaring)
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(gentle orchestral music)
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(sultry music)
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Ah! Am I gonna die?
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Not just yet.
75
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It's only a hangover.
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Oh, Doc, if I could only unscrew
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this head for a few minutes.
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You know sick as I am, I'm starving.
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Ah, that's all part of it. Here, drink this.
80
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What's in it?
81
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86-proof, 12-year-old scotch,
82
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more commonly called hair of the dog.
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Down the hatch.
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(gasping) Oh, Doc, I feel awful.
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You'll feel better in a minute.
86
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Oh, what was in that pill?
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A few drinks and bam, it's the next day.
88
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Ah, I mentioned amnesia as one of the side effects.
89
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You mean I'll never remember what happened?
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The amnesia is permanent unless an alcoholic drink
91
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is taken within 24 hours.
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But I just had a drink and I still don't remember a...
93
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Wow.
94
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Ah, it's beginning to come back, I see.
95
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Doctor, do you know what I did after I took that pill?
96
00:07:49,220 --> 00:07:52,470
Well, I could make a few shrewd guesses.
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I was standing right in the middle of the room,
98
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right about there, and I turned.
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(lively orchestral music)
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(water lapping)
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(bright orchestral music)
102
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(gentle lullaby music)
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Good morning, Mrs. Brooks.
104
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Would you care for some hot broth?
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Hmm? Oh, oh no, nothing thank you, thank you, Steward.
106
00:09:00,860 --> 00:09:02,880
My husband's in there right now.
107
00:09:02,880 --> 00:09:04,530
We might be going to have a baby.
108
00:09:07,830 --> 00:09:08,723
We're not?
109
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It was apparently a touch of sea sickness.
110
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Of course it might be too early to tell.
111
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I'll make another test next week.
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Oh.
113
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I know it's a shame, what a big disappointment.
114
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Oh, it's not me I'm concerned about,
115
00:09:19,890 --> 00:09:21,820
it's Sandy, it's an obsession with her.
116
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She keeps knitting baby clothes,
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telling everybody she meets she's gonna have a baby.
118
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This is gonna be a big blow to the whole ship.
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Oh, I know, I know.
120
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Never seen a woman so determined to have a baby.
121
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I was counting on that pill you gave me.
122
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You said it was gonna work.
123
00:09:34,100 --> 00:09:36,483
Ah, it's most discouraging, I know, I know.
124
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Too bad we've got to tell her the truth.
125
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What do you mean too bad?
126
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She's got to know the truth.
127
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You think I'd lie to my wife
128
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about something as important as this?
129
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No, no she's got to know the truth.
130
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Oh, Jeff I'm so sorry, I couldn't stand it,
131
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I just couldn't wait another moment.
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I am, I know I am. Say I am.
133
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You am, are.
134
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Oh, oh, oh, I knew it! Oh, darling, I knew it!
135
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Oh, I'm so happy, I knew it, I knew that this time
136
00:10:01,070 --> 00:10:02,990
it just had to be, it had to be true.
137
00:10:02,990 --> 00:10:06,510
Oh, Jeff I'm so, I'm so happy for us, darling.
138
00:10:06,510 --> 00:10:08,280
Oh, my goodness, this dress, I've got to get out of it
139
00:10:08,280 --> 00:10:10,110
right away, it's much too tight.
140
00:10:10,110 --> 00:10:12,119
Let's see, I brought some maternity clothes with me,
141
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so I'll go to my cabin
142
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and get some on right away.
Maternity clothes?
143
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Got so many things to do I don't know where to begin.
144
00:10:16,530 --> 00:10:18,390
I haven't even told Claire yet.
145
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My hair, what am I going to do about my hair?
146
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I know, I know, I'm gonna let it come in natural,
147
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it's much more motherly that way.
148
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Oh, darling, oh!
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Thank you, thank you.
150
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Thank you.
151
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Bye, darling.
152
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Oh!
153
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Well, thanks a lot, Doc, thanks a lot.
154
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What did I do?
155
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What did you do?
156
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You put the whole idea in my head.
157
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I didn't do anything.
158
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You said I am, you are, and you mixed up the whole thing.
159
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When Sandy finds out the truth, we're finished, finished!
160
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Why, don't be ridiculous.
161
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It might not be possible for her to have a baby.
162
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Are you kidding?
163
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Sandy's been checked and double checked.
164
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She can have 100 kids, two at a time one doctor said.
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Aha!
166
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What do you mean, aha?
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Well, let me do a little check and double checking on you.
168
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Oh, well, that won't be necessary, Doctor.
169
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Really?
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You see, Doc, there's,
171
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well, there's something about me you oughta know.
172
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Yes?
173
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I, uh-Yes?
174
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Well, uh-Yes?
175
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Back when I was in military school-
176
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Yes?
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00:11:27,180 --> 00:11:28,510
I, uh-Yes?
178
00:11:29,840 --> 00:11:32,183
Had the mumps.No.
179
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How now brown cow.
180
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How now brown cow.
181
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Grazing in the tall, thick thistle.
182
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Grazing in the tall, thick thistles.
183
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I got it, I got it!
184
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Well, good. Remember it.
185
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You never can tell when that's going to
186
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pop up in a conversation.
187
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An actor has gotta keep in shape.
188
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Beside, it makes me feel well.
189
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You think I want to be the only one
190
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on this entire ship to be seasick?
191
00:12:03,500 --> 00:12:05,157
Oh, I wouldn't worry about that.
192
00:12:05,157 --> 00:12:08,290
Our little friend next door does pretty well at that rail.
193
00:12:08,290 --> 00:12:10,510
Gee, I'd hate to be a fish in this ocean.
194
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Sandy is different. She's expecting.
195
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She's not expecting, she's convinced.
196
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What's wrong with that?
197
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Now look, don't you go gettin' caught up
198
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in that little mother act of hers.
199
00:12:21,990 --> 00:12:25,560
She's no more with child, as she so delicately puts it,
200
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than, than you are.
201
00:12:26,760 --> 00:12:28,040
You're kidding.
202
00:12:28,040 --> 00:12:30,440
Oh, look, here's an ad on our cruise.
203
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Picture yourself on a world cruise
204
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aboard a graceful ocean liner.
205
00:12:34,890 --> 00:12:39,713
You're cruising along at 25 knots over a gently rolling sea.
206
00:12:40,880 --> 00:12:42,710
Yep, it's rolling.
207
00:12:42,710 --> 00:12:45,663
Dining in Japan on succulent octopus.
208
00:12:46,930 --> 00:12:50,470
In Peru, enjoying delicious stuffed oysters.
209
00:12:50,470 --> 00:12:51,820
How do you stuff an oyster?
210
00:12:52,940 --> 00:12:57,563
Then on to glamorous Siam, savoring the exotic iguana.
211
00:12:59,570 --> 00:13:01,368
That's a lizard, isn't it?
212
00:13:01,368 --> 00:13:03,227
I think I'll just lie down.
213
00:13:03,227 --> 00:13:05,800
Oh, King, you're not going to
214
00:13:05,800 --> 00:13:08,210
go through that whole bit again, are you?
215
00:13:08,210 --> 00:13:09,330
I might.
216
00:13:09,330 --> 00:13:12,480
Oh, your fans should see you now.
217
00:13:12,480 --> 00:13:14,574
Go get them and let them look.
218
00:13:14,574 --> 00:13:18,074
(lively orchestral music)
219
00:13:33,910 --> 00:13:34,990
I can see it all now.
220
00:13:34,990 --> 00:13:37,080
Sandy'll find out I lied to her,
221
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she'll realize we can never have a baby,
222
00:13:38,600 --> 00:13:39,433
she'll leave the ship at the next port,
223
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we'll get a divorce, we're finished.
224
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I don't think it's as bad as all that.
225
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Give yourself a chance.
226
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Claire, King, you'll never guess what.
227
00:13:49,440 --> 00:13:50,500
What?
228
00:13:50,500 --> 00:13:51,790
I am.
229
00:13:51,790 --> 00:13:53,082
Are you sure?
230
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Positive, I just got back from the doctor.
231
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Oh, I'm thrilled.
232
00:13:56,520 --> 00:13:57,470
Is the doctor still there?
233
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Oh, poor King.
234
00:13:59,150 --> 00:14:00,210
Who else did you tell?
235
00:14:00,210 --> 00:14:01,820
Well, you know, I came from the radio shack
236
00:14:01,820 --> 00:14:03,790
where I sent cables to everybody.
237
00:14:03,790 --> 00:14:06,240
And you and the radio operator are the first to know.
238
00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:07,440
Well, we're flattered.
239
00:14:08,420 --> 00:14:09,827
Oh, now where are you off to?
240
00:14:09,827 --> 00:14:11,630
I'm going to the beauty parlor. Wanna come along?
241
00:14:11,630 --> 00:14:12,550
All right.
242
00:14:12,550 --> 00:14:14,193
You know what I feel like?
243
00:14:14,193 --> 00:14:16,884
A double dip, hot fudge, marshmallow sundae.
244
00:14:16,884 --> 00:14:19,335
(women laughing)
245
00:14:19,335 --> 00:14:20,168
Oh!
246
00:14:21,730 --> 00:14:23,720
It's no good, I, I can face up to facts,
247
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I'm not good to anybody.
248
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I can never be a father ,I'm no good to my wife,
249
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I might as well be dead.
250
00:14:28,180 --> 00:14:29,830
Nonsense, pure nonsense!
251
00:14:29,830 --> 00:14:31,290
Mr. Brooks, you are a young man,
252
00:14:31,290 --> 00:14:33,560
you have a whole lifetime ahead of you.
253
00:14:33,560 --> 00:14:35,170
I am told you're a very fine writer.
254
00:14:35,170 --> 00:14:36,680
I was, but I'll never write another line
255
00:14:36,680 --> 00:14:37,930
as long as I live.
256
00:14:37,930 --> 00:14:38,763
You wanna laugh?
What?
257
00:14:38,763 --> 00:14:40,277
You know what they called me?
258
00:14:40,277 --> 00:14:41,210
No, what?
259
00:14:41,210 --> 00:14:43,132
Hollywood's most prolific writer.
260
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Huh!
261
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I beg your pardon.
262
00:14:46,793 --> 00:14:49,961
(gentle orchestral music)
263
00:14:49,961 --> 00:14:53,677
Perfect, dear. I'm going to be conservative.
264
00:14:53,677 --> 00:14:55,190
You're a genius.
265
00:14:55,190 --> 00:14:57,180
Oh, thank you so much, my dear.
266
00:14:57,180 --> 00:15:00,640
I mean it, the soft undulating wave,
267
00:15:00,640 --> 00:15:04,117
the contour caressing the skull.
268
00:15:04,117 --> 00:15:06,540
It's fabulously perfect, that's all.
269
00:15:06,540 --> 00:15:08,079
Oh, I'm so glad you like it.
270
00:15:08,079 --> 00:15:10,820
Like it, I adore it. Oh.
271
00:15:10,820 --> 00:15:13,569
Oh, Sheri, please, don't touch, it's still wet.
272
00:15:13,569 --> 00:15:15,157
I'm sorry, love.
273
00:15:15,157 --> 00:15:17,150
(laughing) You're a genius.
274
00:15:17,150 --> 00:15:19,730
Come on, Tulio, dear. We mustn't be late for lunch.
275
00:15:19,730 --> 00:15:20,647
Come, dear.
276
00:15:22,220 --> 00:15:25,050
Oh, Claire, Sandy, hi.Babbette.
277
00:15:25,050 --> 00:15:28,020
You're just in time, you're both a mess.
278
00:15:28,020 --> 00:15:29,330
I'm celebrating.
279
00:15:29,330 --> 00:15:30,163
Oh, really?
280
00:15:30,163 --> 00:15:31,380
She's going to have a baby.
281
00:15:31,380 --> 00:15:33,010
Oh, marvelous, if it's a girl,
282
00:15:33,010 --> 00:15:34,921
the first permanent is on the house.
283
00:15:34,921 --> 00:15:36,960
You're a doll.
284
00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:38,360
Say, is something burning?
285
00:15:40,039 --> 00:15:42,317
Oh, hold the phone, girls.
286
00:15:49,716 --> 00:15:52,299
(can spraying)
287
00:15:54,998 --> 00:15:56,980
There you are, my dear.
288
00:15:56,980 --> 00:15:59,503
My latest creation, burnt almond.
289
00:16:00,555 --> 00:16:03,339
Oh, I love it.
290
00:16:03,339 --> 00:16:04,172
Thank you.
291
00:16:07,840 --> 00:16:09,143
He is heavenly.
292
00:16:17,027 --> 00:16:18,870
And look at it this way, Mr. Brooks.
293
00:16:18,870 --> 00:16:20,920
Sterility is a complex problem.
294
00:16:20,920 --> 00:16:23,140
We don't know a great deal about it, but we do know
295
00:16:23,140 --> 00:16:25,380
that tension can be a contributing factor.
296
00:16:25,380 --> 00:16:27,100
But you already gave me a pill for that.
297
00:16:27,100 --> 00:16:28,300
It was all right as far as it went,
298
00:16:28,300 --> 00:16:30,070
it just didn't go far enough.
299
00:16:30,070 --> 00:16:31,760
Relax, relax.
300
00:16:31,760 --> 00:16:33,770
Sure, relax, that's easy for you to say.
301
00:16:33,770 --> 00:16:35,720
I'm thinking about your wife.
302
00:16:37,250 --> 00:16:38,966
You mean give my wife a pill?
303
00:16:38,966 --> 00:16:39,799
But of course.
304
00:16:45,184 --> 00:16:48,060
Only this time, I'm going to give her
305
00:16:48,060 --> 00:16:50,690
something a little bit more potent.
306
00:16:50,690 --> 00:16:51,753
More potent?
307
00:16:53,440 --> 00:16:56,170
The reaction will be more pronounced than before,
308
00:16:56,170 --> 00:16:58,300
particularly with both of you taking a pill.
309
00:16:58,300 --> 00:17:01,350
I assume of course that you're willing to try it.
310
00:17:01,350 --> 00:17:03,320
Oh, of course, I'm willing to try it.
311
00:17:03,320 --> 00:17:05,094
I mean, more potent, huh?
312
00:17:05,094 --> 00:17:07,070
(pills rattling)
313
00:17:07,070 --> 00:17:09,980
More. (chuckles)
314
00:17:09,980 --> 00:17:11,993
Shall we cut and bleach it?
315
00:17:11,993 --> 00:17:14,984
Mm, no, no, just a wash and set.
316
00:17:14,984 --> 00:17:16,510
I'm gonna let it come in natural.
317
00:17:16,510 --> 00:17:18,360
You'll put on 10 years.
318
00:17:18,360 --> 00:17:20,150
Well, that'll go with the extra 20 pounds
319
00:17:20,150 --> 00:17:21,550
I'm going to put on.
320
00:17:21,550 --> 00:17:23,440
Now that she's going to become a mother,
321
00:17:23,440 --> 00:17:25,040
she wants to look the part.
322
00:17:25,040 --> 00:17:27,200
You mean it's really true this time?
323
00:17:27,200 --> 00:17:29,040
I just came from the doctor.
324
00:17:29,040 --> 00:17:31,010
Well, isn't that a kick in the head.
325
00:17:31,010 --> 00:17:33,605
Ah, no, it's no good, Doc. It won't work.
326
00:17:33,605 --> 00:17:34,640
Why not?
327
00:17:34,640 --> 00:17:36,750
She's not gonna take a pill from me for that.
328
00:17:36,750 --> 00:17:38,950
Use your head, Doc, she thinks the job's done.
329
00:17:38,950 --> 00:17:40,676
Why would she take a pill from me?
330
00:17:40,676 --> 00:17:42,080
(clicking tongue) For a writer,
331
00:17:42,080 --> 00:17:44,490
you use very little imagination.
332
00:17:44,490 --> 00:17:46,584
You don't tell her about the pill.
333
00:17:46,584 --> 00:17:47,550
Don't tell her about the pill?
334
00:17:47,550 --> 00:17:49,150
Of course not.
335
00:17:49,150 --> 00:17:50,820
Arrange for a private dinner party,
336
00:17:50,820 --> 00:17:53,053
just the two of you, be romantic.
337
00:17:53,970 --> 00:17:57,200
You know, candlelight, flower on the table.
338
00:17:57,200 --> 00:18:00,630
Wine for a toast, she can't object to a little wine.
339
00:18:00,630 --> 00:18:02,260
You mean put the pills in the wine?
340
00:18:02,260 --> 00:18:05,191
Bing, bing, one pill in each glass.
341
00:18:05,191 --> 00:18:07,813
A sentimental toast and (popping) oh!
342
00:18:08,720 --> 00:18:11,590
(laughing)
343
00:18:11,590 --> 00:18:14,190
Imagine that, a baby after all this time.
344
00:18:14,190 --> 00:18:16,790
Isn't nature full of screams?
345
00:18:16,790 --> 00:18:19,090
Well, if at first you don't succeed.
346
00:18:19,090 --> 00:18:21,010
Yeah, well I'll tell you one thing,
347
00:18:21,010 --> 00:18:23,240
I'm not gonna have any children.
348
00:18:23,240 --> 00:18:26,163
I should hope not. You're not even married.
349
00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:31,420
Doctor, if these pills work,
350
00:18:31,420 --> 00:18:32,950
my hat's off to medical science.
351
00:18:32,950 --> 00:18:35,790
They will work, I'm sure of it, just follow my directions.
352
00:18:35,790 --> 00:18:37,771
I will. Oh, Doctor, they won't hurt her, will they?
353
00:18:37,771 --> 00:18:39,440
On the contrary.Oh.
354
00:18:39,440 --> 00:18:40,842
Don't you worry about a thing.
355
00:18:40,842 --> 00:18:41,733
I won't, I won't.
356
00:18:45,550 --> 00:18:48,730
Patient is unusually open to suggestions.
357
00:18:48,730 --> 00:18:50,610
Prescribed two aspirin tablets,
358
00:18:50,610 --> 00:18:53,503
telling him they're even more potent than the first.
359
00:18:54,629 --> 00:18:55,462
(chuckling)
360
00:18:55,462 --> 00:18:58,462
(jazzy piano music)
361
00:18:59,910 --> 00:19:01,670
I get such a charge out of her.
362
00:19:01,670 --> 00:19:04,490
She's so excited about the baby.
363
00:19:04,490 --> 00:19:06,298
Isn't she though?
364
00:19:06,298 --> 00:19:08,960
Psst, listen, would you like to go in with me
365
00:19:08,960 --> 00:19:10,403
and we'll give her a shower?
366
00:19:11,538 --> 00:19:14,933
I'll wash her hair, Claire, and that's as far as I go.
367
00:19:15,800 --> 00:19:18,510
The reaction will be more pronounced than before,
368
00:19:18,510 --> 00:19:20,640
particularly with both of you taking a pill.
369
00:19:20,640 --> 00:19:21,500
Oh, Doctor, they won't
370
00:19:21,500 --> 00:19:22,586
hurt her, will they?
371
00:19:22,586 --> 00:19:23,453
On the contrary.
372
00:19:23,453 --> 00:19:26,630
It's almost time for dinner, honey, you ready?
373
00:19:26,630 --> 00:19:29,750
Sweetheart, I have a wonderful idea.
374
00:19:29,750 --> 00:19:32,390
Why don't we not have dinner tonight, hmm?
375
00:19:32,390 --> 00:19:33,593
What's so wonderful about that?
376
00:19:33,593 --> 00:19:35,360
Oh, I mean not go out for dinner.
377
00:19:35,360 --> 00:19:37,220
I was thinking, why don't we have dinner here,
378
00:19:37,220 --> 00:19:40,210
alone in the cabin, just the two of us, hmm?
379
00:19:40,210 --> 00:19:42,820
Oh, you mean because of the baby.
380
00:19:42,820 --> 00:19:46,150
(laughing) Yeah, because of the baby.
381
00:19:46,150 --> 00:19:47,695
I figure we'd have a little candlelight,
382
00:19:47,695 --> 00:19:50,073
a little wine, and us.
383
00:19:51,400 --> 00:19:52,440
That sounds marvelous.
384
00:19:52,440 --> 00:19:54,230
Ooh, then we can do it.
385
00:19:54,230 --> 00:19:56,100
I'd love to do it, let me see.
386
00:19:56,100 --> 00:19:57,237
We can't, we promised King and Claire
387
00:19:57,237 --> 00:19:59,588
that we'd have dinner with them.
388
00:19:59,588 --> 00:20:00,623
Again?
389
00:20:01,520 --> 00:20:02,841
Again?
390
00:20:02,841 --> 00:20:04,900
Honey, you know they expect
391
00:20:04,900 --> 00:20:07,250
to have dinner with us every night.
392
00:20:07,250 --> 00:20:10,210
I'm getting pretty sick of what they expect.
393
00:20:10,210 --> 00:20:13,343
Up to and including their little stranger.
394
00:20:14,930 --> 00:20:16,820
I'm getting sick and tired of sitting opposite
395
00:20:16,820 --> 00:20:18,620
of that stupid actor every night
396
00:20:18,620 --> 00:20:20,870
and watching him sprinkle wheat germ on everything.
397
00:20:20,870 --> 00:20:21,890
Where's my wheat germ?
398
00:20:21,890 --> 00:20:24,120
I don't know, you probably used it all up.
399
00:20:24,120 --> 00:20:26,770
After all, you only brought 15 quarts.
400
00:20:26,770 --> 00:20:29,490
A guy can get pretty aah watching ah-ah-ah
401
00:20:29,490 --> 00:20:31,620
sprinkle wheat germ on his raw meat.
402
00:20:31,620 --> 00:20:34,470
I know, honey, but he means well.
403
00:20:34,470 --> 00:20:36,172
I found it.
404
00:20:36,172 --> 00:20:39,340
Oh, goodie. Here, oh, hook me.
405
00:20:39,340 --> 00:20:41,220
I've got it, I'll tell 'em you're sick,
406
00:20:41,220 --> 00:20:43,426
that way we can have dinner here alone.
407
00:20:43,426 --> 00:20:44,259
(Sandy laughing)
408
00:20:44,259 --> 00:20:45,920
Why don't I tell 'em that you're sick again,
409
00:20:45,920 --> 00:20:47,810
that way we could have dinner alone.
410
00:20:47,810 --> 00:20:49,027
Well, if you think they'd believe it.
411
00:20:49,027 --> 00:20:50,383
They'd never believe it.
412
00:20:50,383 --> 00:20:51,970
It's happened before.
413
00:20:51,970 --> 00:20:53,610
Well, it's happened before.
414
00:20:53,610 --> 00:20:56,493
Nonsense, I am as healthy as an ox.
415
00:20:57,640 --> 00:20:59,220
Well-Good, sweetheart.
416
00:20:59,220 --> 00:21:01,430
It's settled, I'll order some wine right now,
417
00:21:01,430 --> 00:21:04,245
just for us, the two of us, down here alone.
418
00:21:04,245 --> 00:21:06,066
Jeff, I don't know.
419
00:21:06,066 --> 00:21:07,175
You don't know, what do you mean, you don't know?
420
00:21:07,175 --> 00:21:08,430
What's the, what's the matter with you?
421
00:21:08,430 --> 00:21:13,070
I, I, I think I, I've got a, a touch of morning sickness.
422
00:21:13,070 --> 00:21:15,800
Morning sickness, at eight o'clock at night?
423
00:21:15,800 --> 00:21:17,610
Aren't you running a little fast?
424
00:21:17,610 --> 00:21:19,880
Oh, here's your yogurt, strawberry.
425
00:21:19,880 --> 00:21:20,970
Shall we take it along?
426
00:21:20,970 --> 00:21:22,120
Claire, please don't.
427
00:21:23,810 --> 00:21:25,910
When you're expecting, there're just certain things
428
00:21:25,910 --> 00:21:28,050
that you have to expect.
429
00:21:28,050 --> 00:21:29,190
But you always have yogurt
430
00:21:29,190 --> 00:21:31,990
whenever there's pig knuckles and sauerkraut on the menu.
431
00:21:31,990 --> 00:21:34,720
Oh, sweetheart, I hate to see you suffer like this.
432
00:21:34,720 --> 00:21:38,420
No, I don't mind at all, I really love every moment of it.
433
00:21:38,420 --> 00:21:40,260
Oh, really? What about our private dinner?
434
00:21:40,260 --> 00:21:43,670
Oh, I better not. I better take a rain check.
435
00:21:43,670 --> 00:21:45,200
You don't mind, do you, Jeff?
436
00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:48,113
I don't mind, baby, I'm just thinking about us.
437
00:21:49,080 --> 00:21:50,260
Want me to stay in with you?
438
00:21:50,260 --> 00:21:52,750
Oh, no, no, I'd really rather be alone.
439
00:21:52,750 --> 00:21:55,000
But you go out and eat, honey.
440
00:21:55,000 --> 00:21:56,550
Baby, I couldn't eat without you.
441
00:21:56,550 --> 00:21:59,080
I mean, it just wouldn't be right for me to walk,
442
00:21:59,080 --> 00:22:01,730
of course they do have pig's knuckles and sauerkraut.
443
00:22:03,200 --> 00:22:05,645
I could have that with a little beer.
444
00:22:05,645 --> 00:22:08,150
(door slamming)
445
00:22:08,150 --> 00:22:09,890
Oh, what's the matter with me?
446
00:22:09,890 --> 00:22:11,163
I'm sorry, sweetheart.
447
00:22:13,738 --> 00:22:16,988
A little beer, a little pig's knuckles.
448
00:22:18,842 --> 00:22:19,889
Hi.
449
00:22:19,889 --> 00:22:21,997
Hi, I was just going for a bite.
450
00:22:21,997 --> 00:22:23,620
So was I.
451
00:22:23,620 --> 00:22:24,620
Yours down again?
452
00:22:24,620 --> 00:22:25,457
And out.
453
00:22:26,470 --> 00:22:27,333
Mine too.
454
00:22:30,250 --> 00:22:32,040
Well, you know, we've had so many meals together,
455
00:22:32,040 --> 00:22:34,240
the whole ship's beginning to talk about us.
456
00:22:36,880 --> 00:22:37,713
Yeah.
457
00:22:39,510 --> 00:22:41,940
You're taking this news pretty bad, aren't you?
458
00:22:41,940 --> 00:22:42,780
What news?
459
00:22:42,780 --> 00:22:45,010
About the baby I mean.Oh.
460
00:22:45,010 --> 00:22:47,160
You still seem to be in a state of shock.
461
00:22:48,230 --> 00:22:50,880
You just don't recognize happiness when you see it.
462
00:22:52,030 --> 00:22:53,633
I just don't understand.
463
00:22:54,580 --> 00:22:57,120
I don't understand this wild urge to leave your blood
464
00:22:57,120 --> 00:23:01,209
in the veins of some poor, unsuspecting offspring.
465
00:23:01,209 --> 00:23:02,042
(Jeff chuckling)
466
00:23:02,042 --> 00:23:05,080
What is the population of the world anyway, three billion?
467
00:23:05,080 --> 00:23:06,020
Give or take a couple.
468
00:23:06,020 --> 00:23:09,377
Well, I know we were told to be fruitful and multiply,
469
00:23:09,377 --> 00:23:11,627
but how fruity can you get?
470
00:23:14,838 --> 00:23:16,840
You don't understand. You just hate kids.
471
00:23:16,840 --> 00:23:17,673
I do not.
472
00:23:18,696 --> 00:23:21,070
If King and I ever get to the point of where we feel
473
00:23:21,070 --> 00:23:22,690
we're not enough for one another,
474
00:23:22,690 --> 00:23:24,590
well, I'll adopt an orphan.
475
00:23:24,590 --> 00:23:27,310
That way we'll be making the world a little better place
476
00:23:27,310 --> 00:23:29,830
for some kid that's already stuck with it.
477
00:23:29,830 --> 00:23:33,120
Aren't you overlooking a little basic biological urge?
478
00:23:33,120 --> 00:23:34,680
Oh, now we're gonna get the one
479
00:23:34,680 --> 00:23:37,620
about the natural urge for reproduction.
480
00:23:37,620 --> 00:23:39,420
Believe me, there is such a thing.
481
00:23:40,404 --> 00:23:43,000
Well, the dear days before I was married
482
00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:45,260
and in show business, I remember all the guys
483
00:23:45,260 --> 00:23:48,113
were just loaded with that biological urge.
484
00:23:49,010 --> 00:23:50,920
I can remember the sales pitches now.
485
00:23:50,920 --> 00:23:52,710
It was like, look, baby,
486
00:23:52,710 --> 00:23:55,050
I've spent a lot of money on you tonight.
487
00:23:58,886 --> 00:24:00,469
Or, don't say no,
488
00:24:02,697 --> 00:24:04,683
you're the first girl I've ever asked.
489
00:24:08,583 --> 00:24:12,166
Ah, but you can't send me home like this.
490
00:24:13,609 --> 00:24:16,858
(Claire and Jeff laughing)
491
00:24:16,858 --> 00:24:20,140
Ah, and I'll respect you, that'll be our bond.
492
00:24:20,140 --> 00:24:22,761
Don't fight it, this thing is bigger than both of us.
493
00:24:22,761 --> 00:24:25,587
(laughing) Two martinis. That one never worked with me.
494
00:24:25,587 --> 00:24:29,120
You know, not once did I ever hear a guy say to me,
495
00:24:29,120 --> 00:24:31,563
please, I wanna be a daddy.
496
00:24:33,770 --> 00:24:36,620
Urge for reproduction, my eye.
497
00:24:36,620 --> 00:24:39,680
There's a lot more urge around than there is reproduction.
498
00:24:39,680 --> 00:24:40,623
Yeah.Yeah.
499
00:24:42,110 --> 00:24:43,590
You know, with the fatherhood potential I have,
500
00:24:43,590 --> 00:24:45,460
I should've married you.
501
00:24:45,460 --> 00:24:47,370
What's wrong with your fatherhood potential,
502
00:24:47,370 --> 00:24:48,250
you just made it.
503
00:24:48,250 --> 00:24:50,920
Well, yeah, but what a struggle.
504
00:24:50,920 --> 00:24:54,550
Two years ago, I told Sandy I thought we should adopt a kid.
505
00:24:54,550 --> 00:24:55,980
And she wouldn't do it?
506
00:24:55,980 --> 00:24:57,610
No, every time I discussed it,
507
00:24:57,610 --> 00:25:00,553
she'd tell me about the postman's sister-in-law's daughter.
508
00:25:02,030 --> 00:25:04,600
What about the postman's sister-in-law's daughter?
509
00:25:04,600 --> 00:25:06,670
Well, the doctor told her she had a tumor
510
00:25:06,670 --> 00:25:07,870
and could never have children.
511
00:25:07,870 --> 00:25:10,353
The tumor turned out to be a bouncing baby boy.
512
00:25:11,931 --> 00:25:13,410
You know, they thought I was a tumor,
513
00:25:13,410 --> 00:25:16,577
but I fooled 'em, didn't I, didn't I?
514
00:25:16,577 --> 00:25:19,434
(laughing) If you think so, Skoal.
515
00:25:19,434 --> 00:25:20,267
Skoal.
516
00:25:21,274 --> 00:25:22,814
Skoal.
517
00:25:22,814 --> 00:25:27,814
Skoal.
(Jeff laughing)
518
00:25:43,327 --> 00:25:46,323
Look at that moon, they've gotta be kidding.
519
00:25:47,880 --> 00:25:50,070
Yeah, I wonder if they've got one like that
520
00:25:50,070 --> 00:25:51,630
for tourist class.
521
00:25:51,630 --> 00:25:52,600
Just a half moon.
522
00:25:52,600 --> 00:25:57,413
Oh, look at them, aren't they cute?
523
00:26:01,940 --> 00:26:03,983
Do you feel that way about me, dear?
524
00:26:05,260 --> 00:26:07,703
Sure I do, would I be here otherwise?
525
00:26:08,800 --> 00:26:12,183
Oh, dear, Tulio. (giggles) (sighs)
526
00:26:14,485 --> 00:26:17,235
(big band music)
527
00:26:19,350 --> 00:26:20,183
Oh, excuse me.
528
00:26:26,958 --> 00:26:27,791
Uh!
529
00:26:30,740 --> 00:26:31,872
Oh, oh.
530
00:26:31,872 --> 00:26:35,372
(gentle orchestral music)
531
00:26:52,280 --> 00:26:54,620
You know, I surely hope that King and Claire
532
00:26:54,620 --> 00:26:56,370
won't be hurt about this.
533
00:26:56,370 --> 00:26:58,960
Aw, sweetheart, let them be hurt, this is our night.
534
00:26:58,960 --> 00:27:01,439
You know, you're really very thoughtful.
535
00:27:01,439 --> 00:27:02,610
I'm just thinking about us.
536
00:27:02,610 --> 00:27:04,277
Mm, and cute, too.
537
00:27:05,752 --> 00:27:07,504
Oh, honey, I smeared your lipstick, right on your chin.
538
00:27:07,504 --> 00:27:09,245
You did?Mm-hmm.
539
00:27:09,245 --> 00:27:12,745
(mellow orchestral music)
540
00:27:15,373 --> 00:27:18,093
Well, voila.
541
00:27:18,093 --> 00:27:21,050
Oh, uh, Captain, I've ordered a table of two for tonight,
542
00:27:21,050 --> 00:27:22,546
I trust I'm not too early.
543
00:27:22,546 --> 00:27:25,176
It would never be too early for madame.
544
00:27:25,176 --> 00:27:26,906
(speaking foreign language) my love.
545
00:27:26,906 --> 00:27:28,140
(speaking foreign language)
546
00:27:28,140 --> 00:27:30,904
There, you are welcome, I am sure.
547
00:27:30,904 --> 00:27:34,563
(Jeff singing in foreign language)
548
00:27:34,563 --> 00:27:38,550
A toast to the most ravishing creature in this cabin.
549
00:27:38,550 --> 00:27:39,840
You are ravishing, aren't you?
550
00:27:39,840 --> 00:27:41,872
Uh, half ravishing, half Lithuanian.
551
00:27:41,872 --> 00:27:43,470
(both laughing)
552
00:27:43,470 --> 00:27:46,460
Thank you for remembering the old jokes, my love.
553
00:27:46,460 --> 00:27:48,133
To my wife.
554
00:27:48,133 --> 00:27:51,362
Oh, a toast to that, I'll drink to that.
555
00:27:51,362 --> 00:27:52,413
Wait, wait, wait, but just, wait, wait, wait.
556
00:27:52,413 --> 00:27:53,261
What's the matter?
557
00:27:53,261 --> 00:27:55,290
You know the way King and Claire always barge in here.
558
00:27:55,290 --> 00:27:57,670
Oh, by this time they've gone up to dinner.
559
00:27:57,670 --> 00:27:59,032
Why be half safe?
560
00:27:59,032 --> 00:27:59,929
(Sandy laughing)
561
00:27:59,929 --> 00:28:00,793
Happy New Year.
562
00:28:00,793 --> 00:28:03,720
Is this a private ball or can anybody come?
563
00:28:03,720 --> 00:28:05,330
Hi.We're celebrating,
564
00:28:05,330 --> 00:28:08,207
King hasn't been sick for 12 whole hours.
565
00:28:08,207 --> 00:28:09,407
Neither have I.
566
00:28:09,407 --> 00:28:11,058
Let's have a drink to that, hmm?
567
00:28:11,058 --> 00:28:12,597
Sure, why not?
568
00:28:12,597 --> 00:28:13,430
(Jeff yelling)
569
00:28:13,430 --> 00:28:15,960
Oh, is there any more glasses in here?
570
00:28:15,960 --> 00:28:17,310
That was my drink.
571
00:28:17,310 --> 00:28:18,980
And let me tell you, it was delicious.
572
00:28:18,980 --> 00:28:20,180
You had no right to drink my drink.
573
00:28:20,180 --> 00:28:22,400
Come up to the bar, I'll buy you a whole bottle.
574
00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:24,525
Come on, Sandy, we'll all go up to the bar.
575
00:28:24,525 --> 00:28:26,006
I don't want to, and take your hands off my wife.
576
00:28:26,006 --> 00:28:26,839
Say, you're a couple
577
00:28:26,839 --> 00:28:28,140
of rounds ahead of us.
Did she drink,
578
00:28:28,140 --> 00:28:28,973
would you let my wife-
579
00:28:28,973 --> 00:28:30,046
Come on, I wanna dance.
580
00:28:30,046 --> 00:28:31,024
Claire, please, I don't wanna.
581
00:28:31,024 --> 00:28:32,691
Would you bring my wife back?
582
00:28:32,691 --> 00:28:36,114
Sweetheart, would you let go? Honey!
583
00:28:36,114 --> 00:28:37,614
Oh! Sandy, King!
584
00:28:39,260 --> 00:28:41,500
I saw it happen. He's not bleeding, is he?
585
00:28:41,500 --> 00:28:43,200
No, but he's sure knocked out.
586
00:28:43,200 --> 00:28:45,350
Well, that's good, I can't stand the sight of blood.
587
00:28:45,350 --> 00:28:47,890
Come on Claire, let's get him to sickbay.
588
00:28:47,890 --> 00:28:49,536
Oh, that's a good idea.
589
00:28:49,536 --> 00:28:51,203
Oh, he weighs a ton.
590
00:28:52,816 --> 00:28:54,322
(light jazz music)
591
00:28:54,322 --> 00:28:57,570
Well, I wonder what happened to Jeff and Claire.
592
00:28:57,570 --> 00:29:00,550
Probably dancing. Have a drink.
593
00:29:00,550 --> 00:29:02,660
Oh, we'd better wait for them.
594
00:29:02,660 --> 00:29:04,860
Listen to the way my diction has improved.
595
00:29:05,800 --> 00:29:09,963
How now brown cow, grazing in a thick thistle.
596
00:29:11,651 --> 00:29:13,300
It's cute.
597
00:29:13,300 --> 00:29:14,133
Very cute.
598
00:29:15,530 --> 00:29:17,830
It took me a long time to get it just right.
599
00:29:18,768 --> 00:29:20,963
Well, you artists are never satisfied.
600
00:29:22,690 --> 00:29:25,893
Did you know, they thought I was a tumor?
601
00:29:27,177 --> 00:29:30,950
Oh, on second thought, I think I'll have that drink.
602
00:29:30,950 --> 00:29:33,397
Two scotch, make it double.
603
00:29:38,558 --> 00:29:41,225
(both laughing)
604
00:29:58,416 --> 00:29:59,655
Let's have a drink!
605
00:29:59,655 --> 00:30:00,572
Ah, okay.
606
00:30:02,792 --> 00:30:05,375
It's for you, and one for me.
607
00:30:13,656 --> 00:30:16,406
(lid clattering)
608
00:30:22,911 --> 00:30:26,411
(bright orchestral music)
609
00:30:36,190 --> 00:30:37,857
Oh, no, I'm blind.
610
00:30:39,522 --> 00:30:40,355
Oh, oh.
611
00:30:42,871 --> 00:30:44,204
Morning. Oh, no.
612
00:30:48,162 --> 00:30:48,995
Claire.
613
00:30:53,510 --> 00:30:54,343
Claire.
614
00:30:55,663 --> 00:30:56,740
Good morning, sweetheart.
615
00:30:56,740 --> 00:30:58,613
What're you doing here?
616
00:31:01,110 --> 00:31:02,310
What am I doing here?
617
00:31:02,310 --> 00:31:03,870
Oh, it's you. Oh.
618
00:31:05,340 --> 00:31:07,823
We're in sickbay. How'd we get here?
619
00:31:07,823 --> 00:31:08,903
Don't you remember?
620
00:31:08,903 --> 00:31:11,140
I don't remember a thing. Ooh.
621
00:31:13,180 --> 00:31:15,930
Frankly, I was feeling a little high myself last night,
622
00:31:15,930 --> 00:31:18,283
but I'll do my best to fill you in.
623
00:31:19,580 --> 00:31:21,973
I remember you had a pretty nasty fall.
624
00:31:23,820 --> 00:31:25,120
I was worried about a concussion,
625
00:31:25,120 --> 00:31:26,960
that's why I brought you up here.
626
00:31:26,960 --> 00:31:30,640
You mean that, you mean we spent the night here together?
627
00:31:30,640 --> 00:31:33,590
Apparently. And you were babbling something.
628
00:31:33,590 --> 00:31:35,440
I couldn't quite make it out.
629
00:31:35,440 --> 00:31:37,973
Something about pills or-
630
00:31:37,973 --> 00:31:39,773
Ooh.
631
00:31:39,773 --> 00:31:41,170
Yeah, that's what scared me.
632
00:31:41,170 --> 00:31:42,530
That's why I went over there and looked
633
00:31:42,530 --> 00:31:43,930
in that medicine cabinet and I found something
634
00:31:43,930 --> 00:31:46,430
that looked like aspirin.
635
00:31:46,430 --> 00:31:49,913
I gave you one and I took one, too.
636
00:31:51,760 --> 00:31:56,490
You gave me one of these pills, and took one yourself?
637
00:31:56,490 --> 00:31:59,010
Yes, and boy, I must've been loaded last night
638
00:31:59,010 --> 00:32:02,460
because I don't remember a thing after that,
639
00:32:02,460 --> 00:32:04,530
until I woke up a few minutes ago.
640
00:32:04,530 --> 00:32:05,490
Oh, thank goodness.
641
00:32:05,490 --> 00:32:07,730
Now, Claire, now you've gotta promise me,
642
00:32:07,730 --> 00:32:10,500
you mustn't take a drink for 24 hours.
643
00:32:10,500 --> 00:32:13,930
Exactly what I was just telling myself.
644
00:32:13,930 --> 00:32:16,863
Remember now, no drink for 24 hours.
645
00:32:16,863 --> 00:32:18,140
Oh, oh.
646
00:32:18,140 --> 00:32:20,301
Where you going?To see my wife.
647
00:32:20,301 --> 00:32:21,500
What about the doctor?
648
00:32:21,500 --> 00:32:22,850
He's done enough already.
649
00:32:26,050 --> 00:32:27,170
Oh, good morning, Mr. Brooks.
650
00:32:27,170 --> 00:32:28,053
Oh, excuse me, good morning.
651
00:32:28,053 --> 00:32:29,570
Did you by any chance see my wife this morning?
652
00:32:29,570 --> 00:32:31,130
Yes sir, she's in your cabin,
653
00:32:31,130 --> 00:32:32,780
having breakfast with Mr. Banner.
654
00:32:32,780 --> 00:32:33,613
Oh.
655
00:32:33,613 --> 00:32:34,990
I'm glad she's got her sea legs again,
656
00:32:34,990 --> 00:32:36,290
she ordered Coffee Royale.
657
00:32:37,250 --> 00:32:38,850
Oh, Coffee Roy...
658
00:32:38,850 --> 00:32:40,352
That's brandy!
659
00:32:40,352 --> 00:32:42,851
(glass clanking)
660
00:32:42,851 --> 00:32:44,501
Excuse me.
661
00:32:44,501 --> 00:32:45,392
(woman shrieks)
662
00:32:45,392 --> 00:32:47,142
I'm sorry, excuse me.
663
00:32:48,150 --> 00:32:50,440
I never slept so well in my life.
664
00:32:50,440 --> 00:32:52,870
I didn't even hear Claire get up.
665
00:32:52,870 --> 00:32:55,080
Jeff didn't wake me up this morning either.
666
00:32:55,080 --> 00:32:56,420
I think he's getting more considerate
667
00:32:56,420 --> 00:32:58,170
now that he's gonna become a daddy.
668
00:32:59,140 --> 00:33:00,659
Sandy!
669
00:33:00,659 --> 00:33:01,492
Oh, oh thanks for that.
670
00:33:01,492 --> 00:33:04,050
Are you insane, it's boiling hot.
671
00:33:04,050 --> 00:33:05,140
Honey, I am insane, you know I'm insane
672
00:33:05,140 --> 00:33:07,230
about my coffee and brandy.
673
00:33:07,230 --> 00:33:08,480
Well, then you're scalding yourself for nothing.
674
00:33:08,480 --> 00:33:10,660
That's just plain black coffee, here's the brandy.
675
00:33:10,660 --> 00:33:12,050
Oh, yes, thank you, thank you, sweetheart.
676
00:33:12,050 --> 00:33:14,033
I, I love, I love brandy in my coffee.
677
00:33:14,033 --> 00:33:17,350
Oh, what happened to your poor head?
678
00:33:17,350 --> 00:33:18,730
I fell out of a plane.
679
00:33:18,730 --> 00:33:20,580
Well, your mommy'll fix it for you.
680
00:33:22,400 --> 00:33:23,880
Have some coffee with us, old boy.
681
00:33:23,880 --> 00:33:25,140
No thanks, I just had some.
682
00:33:25,140 --> 00:33:27,070
What are you eating?
683
00:33:27,070 --> 00:33:30,250
Finest tonic in the whole world, oatmeal,
684
00:33:30,250 --> 00:33:32,370
black syrup molasses, wheat germ.
685
00:33:32,370 --> 00:33:33,583
I'm sorry I asked.
686
00:33:34,540 --> 00:33:36,365
But you are hungry, huh?
687
00:33:36,365 --> 00:33:37,198
Famished.
688
00:33:37,198 --> 00:33:40,120
Me too, I've never been so hungry in all my life.
689
00:33:40,120 --> 00:33:41,713
Yeah, that's all part of it.
690
00:33:43,070 --> 00:33:44,790
Well-Ow!
691
00:33:44,790 --> 00:33:47,400
Well, I get dressed for a tournament.
692
00:33:47,400 --> 00:33:48,843
Me too, I'll be ready.
693
00:33:51,160 --> 00:33:54,620
Poor baby, how did you hurt your little head?
694
00:33:54,620 --> 00:33:56,950
I tripped chasing you and King last night.
695
00:33:56,950 --> 00:33:59,383
That's funny, I don't remember when it happened.
696
00:33:59,383 --> 00:34:00,660
Do you remember anything about last night?
697
00:34:00,660 --> 00:34:02,170
Anything at all?
698
00:34:02,170 --> 00:34:04,663
Nothing really after I left the cabin except,
699
00:34:05,730 --> 00:34:09,020
except you know that, that, that awful sea sickness feeling
700
00:34:09,020 --> 00:34:11,750
came around again, my goodness, it must've hit me
701
00:34:11,750 --> 00:34:14,490
pretty hard, I don't even remember how I got to bed.
702
00:34:14,490 --> 00:34:15,440
You don't, huh?
703
00:34:16,279 --> 00:34:18,530
But I had a marvelous sleep.
704
00:34:18,530 --> 00:34:21,591
Thank you for not awakening me this morning.
705
00:34:21,591 --> 00:34:22,970
Oh, it's all right.
706
00:34:22,970 --> 00:34:25,220
You know, when I woke up,
707
00:34:25,220 --> 00:34:28,260
I felt like I owned the whole world.
708
00:34:28,260 --> 00:34:30,990
I never remember feeling so good before.
709
00:34:30,990 --> 00:34:33,060
Never?Never.
710
00:34:33,060 --> 00:34:36,180
Say, how about a game of deck tennis?
711
00:34:36,180 --> 00:34:37,520
Deck tennis?
712
00:34:37,520 --> 00:34:40,988
Yes. King entered us in a tournament.
713
00:34:40,988 --> 00:34:43,366
Huh, I wish he'd stop being our social director.
714
00:34:43,366 --> 00:34:44,600
(Sandy giggling)
715
00:34:44,600 --> 00:34:46,390
What are you smiling at?
716
00:34:46,390 --> 00:34:50,410
Oh, nothing, darling. I'm just so very happy.
717
00:34:50,410 --> 00:34:53,100
At last we've got what we always wanted,
718
00:34:53,100 --> 00:34:54,780
what our marriage always needed.
719
00:34:54,780 --> 00:34:56,320
Yeah.
720
00:34:56,320 --> 00:34:57,650
You know, I think it's gonna make
721
00:34:57,650 --> 00:35:00,100
a world of difference in our lives.
722
00:35:00,100 --> 00:35:01,600
It could.
723
00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:04,660
I uh, I suppose King got seasick too, huh?
724
00:35:04,660 --> 00:35:06,893
Yeah, so he said, isn't that funny?
725
00:35:09,270 --> 00:35:11,263
Yeah, it's a riot.
726
00:35:12,250 --> 00:35:13,610
You know, we finally figured it out,
727
00:35:13,610 --> 00:35:16,650
it was all that wine we drank, we drank it so fast.
728
00:35:16,650 --> 00:35:17,970
Yeah, no doubt about it, it was the wine.
729
00:35:17,970 --> 00:35:20,436
Well, it's all over now, thank goodness.
730
00:35:20,436 --> 00:35:21,730
Thank goodness, yeah.
731
00:35:21,730 --> 00:35:24,000
It's amazing how it changes you though.
732
00:35:24,000 --> 00:35:27,250
I can promise you, I've put on a whole inch around the top.
733
00:35:27,250 --> 00:35:28,743
That's impossible.
734
00:35:30,847 --> 00:35:32,760
You like my new scent?
735
00:35:32,760 --> 00:35:33,970
Yeah, what is it?
736
00:35:33,970 --> 00:35:34,893
My Sin.
737
00:35:36,788 --> 00:35:38,988
(Jeff chuckles)
738
00:35:38,988 --> 00:35:40,773
(sighing) Figures.
739
00:35:45,148 --> 00:35:46,940
You know what today is, honey?
740
00:35:46,940 --> 00:35:49,700
Hmm?You know what day this is?
741
00:35:49,700 --> 00:35:51,270
Thursday?
742
00:35:51,270 --> 00:35:53,070
No, it's King's birthday.
743
00:35:53,070 --> 00:35:55,430
The captain's giving him a party.
744
00:35:55,430 --> 00:35:56,743
That's nice.
745
00:35:56,743 --> 00:35:57,576
You know, I just thought
746
00:35:57,576 --> 00:35:59,650
of a wonderful present to give him.
747
00:35:59,650 --> 00:36:01,380
It's something of yours.
748
00:36:01,380 --> 00:36:03,000
Something of mine? What?
749
00:36:03,000 --> 00:36:05,310
You know that pair of binoculars
750
00:36:05,310 --> 00:36:07,200
you picked up in Tokyo?
751
00:36:07,200 --> 00:36:08,543
Oh, those, yeah.
752
00:36:10,530 --> 00:36:13,160
Well, you wanna give him something yourself?
753
00:36:13,160 --> 00:36:14,951
I've given him too much already.
754
00:36:14,951 --> 00:36:16,882
(Sandy giggles)
755
00:36:16,882 --> 00:36:20,210
Oh, darling, I'm so happy right now.
756
00:36:20,210 --> 00:36:21,347
I think this is the most wonderful thing
757
00:36:21,347 --> 00:36:23,850
that's ever happened to us.
758
00:36:23,850 --> 00:36:26,320
I tell you, if another catastrophe had come along,
759
00:36:26,320 --> 00:36:29,183
I don't what really would've happened to our marriage.
760
00:36:30,530 --> 00:36:32,530
Sometimes I, I think of all kinds of terrible things.
761
00:36:32,530 --> 00:36:35,630
Sweetheart, we'd have made out somehow, wouldn't we?
762
00:36:35,630 --> 00:36:37,860
Well, anyway, it's silly to talk about it
763
00:36:37,860 --> 00:36:39,959
'cause we've been so lucky.
764
00:36:39,959 --> 00:36:42,160
Wonder what King'll say when he finds out
765
00:36:42,160 --> 00:36:43,950
we're gonna give him a party.
766
00:36:43,950 --> 00:36:45,245
Oh, he'll say something.
767
00:36:45,245 --> 00:36:48,250
(laughing) I know, you be in charge
768
00:36:48,250 --> 00:36:50,380
of the entertainment committee because you're so cute
769
00:36:50,380 --> 00:36:52,513
at thinking of wonderful things to do.
770
00:36:54,130 --> 00:36:56,580
Yeah, I always think of wonderful things to do.
771
00:36:59,120 --> 00:36:59,953
All ready.
772
00:37:02,110 --> 00:37:04,540
Ready and waiting. Bye, honey.
773
00:37:04,540 --> 00:37:06,120
Bye.
774
00:37:06,120 --> 00:37:07,983
Oh, wonderful things.
775
00:37:09,659 --> 00:37:13,159
(somber orchestral music)
776
00:37:18,843 --> 00:37:22,030
Oh, Captain, I'm so sorry I'm late.
777
00:37:22,030 --> 00:37:23,403
How nice to see you, dear.
778
00:37:27,185 --> 00:37:29,173
Contemporary sociological phenomenon.
779
00:37:30,180 --> 00:37:33,580
Yes, um, ladies and gentlemen, I think you all know
780
00:37:33,580 --> 00:37:36,860
that this little gala is being given in honor
781
00:37:36,860 --> 00:37:40,730
of one of our most famous passengers, Mr. King Banner,
782
00:37:40,730 --> 00:37:42,967
who I'm sure he won't mind if we all call him King.
783
00:37:42,967 --> 00:37:45,950
Now we all know of his ability as an actor,
784
00:37:45,950 --> 00:37:48,440
but few of us know that he is one
785
00:37:48,440 --> 00:37:51,240
of the really great weightlifters.
786
00:37:51,240 --> 00:37:53,070
And I think with a little more encouragement
787
00:37:53,070 --> 00:37:55,670
from all of you, including myself,
788
00:37:55,670 --> 00:37:59,530
we would be able to get him up here to lift a few for us.
789
00:37:59,530 --> 00:38:02,447
(crowd applauding)
790
00:38:05,760 --> 00:38:09,920
Thank you very much.
791
00:38:09,920 --> 00:38:13,370
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
792
00:38:13,370 --> 00:38:15,469
He's lifting a few himself.
793
00:38:15,469 --> 00:38:16,637
Oh.
794
00:38:16,637 --> 00:38:17,470
Would you hold it please?
795
00:38:17,470 --> 00:38:19,107
I'd like to get just one quick picture.
796
00:38:21,510 --> 00:38:23,600
Oh, thank you, you'll love it.
797
00:38:23,600 --> 00:38:26,109
You're not ashamed of me, are you?
798
00:38:26,109 --> 00:38:27,538
How could you possibly think that?
799
00:38:27,538 --> 00:38:29,720
Ah, you dear boy.
800
00:38:29,720 --> 00:38:32,053
(drum roll)
801
00:38:33,909 --> 00:38:36,826
(crowd applauding)
802
00:38:42,187 --> 00:38:44,520
(drum roll)
803
00:38:46,381 --> 00:38:48,233
(crowd applauding)
804
00:38:48,233 --> 00:38:51,233
Hold it. Thank you.
805
00:38:53,373 --> 00:38:55,706
(drum roll)
806
00:38:59,130 --> 00:39:01,913
Look at him up there, fathead.
807
00:39:02,790 --> 00:39:05,213
Fine father my baby's gonna have.
808
00:39:05,213 --> 00:39:08,046
(whimsical music)
809
00:39:15,950 --> 00:39:18,704
(crowd applauding)
810
00:39:18,704 --> 00:39:20,763
Kid'll probably be born with a hernia.
811
00:39:20,763 --> 00:39:24,180
(light orchestral music)
812
00:39:27,970 --> 00:39:31,490
And he doesn't even know how lucky he is.
813
00:39:31,490 --> 00:39:33,110
Suppose he ever found out.
814
00:39:33,110 --> 00:39:36,600
And he will find out when he sees the baby.
815
00:39:36,600 --> 00:39:38,583
Only thing to do is tell him,
816
00:39:38,583 --> 00:39:42,870
come right out and face him like a man and tell him.
817
00:39:42,870 --> 00:39:47,370
He'd understand. We've been friends a long time.
818
00:39:47,370 --> 00:39:49,600
King, we've been friends a long time.
819
00:39:49,600 --> 00:39:52,463
There's something very important I have to discuss with you.
820
00:39:53,420 --> 00:39:54,680
Sure, pal. What?
821
00:39:55,520 --> 00:39:57,910
Uh, you've been around a lot, I mean,
822
00:39:57,910 --> 00:39:59,450
you know what the score is.
823
00:39:59,450 --> 00:40:02,160
Sure, I guess so.
824
00:40:02,160 --> 00:40:03,483
Wow, what a build.
825
00:40:05,509 --> 00:40:07,640
I take very good care of myself, you know.
826
00:40:07,640 --> 00:40:08,473
Yeah.
827
00:40:09,570 --> 00:40:10,563
Wow!
828
00:40:13,547 --> 00:40:15,460
What's eating you?
829
00:40:15,460 --> 00:40:16,930
King, I have a problem.
830
00:40:16,930 --> 00:40:18,920
I mean, it happened when I was in military school.
831
00:40:18,920 --> 00:40:21,640
For four years, Sandy and I, we want, I want desperate,
832
00:40:21,640 --> 00:40:25,210
but we can't, I mean I try but I just can't, I can't.
833
00:40:25,210 --> 00:40:28,313
You mean? Poor Sandy.
834
00:40:29,350 --> 00:40:31,637
How dare you, you married her.
835
00:40:34,690 --> 00:40:37,140
I have a problem and I might as well admit it.
836
00:40:37,140 --> 00:40:39,610
I am just beginning to realize that.
837
00:40:39,610 --> 00:40:41,856
It's not the sort of thing you talk about.
838
00:40:41,856 --> 00:40:43,390
Well, you're sure right.
839
00:40:43,390 --> 00:40:45,710
Like I say, it started when I was in military school.
840
00:40:45,710 --> 00:40:47,410
No excuse.
841
00:40:47,410 --> 00:40:49,560
Look, pal, have you ever thought
842
00:40:49,560 --> 00:40:51,460
of going to a doctor about this?
843
00:40:51,460 --> 00:40:53,510
I did, that's where the whole trouble started.
844
00:40:53,510 --> 00:40:56,490
He gave me these pills, see, I put the pills in the wine,
845
00:40:56,490 --> 00:40:57,530
that's where you came in.
846
00:40:57,530 --> 00:40:58,433
Poor Sandy.
847
00:40:59,696 --> 00:41:00,900
You like Sandy, don't you?
848
00:41:00,900 --> 00:41:03,140
Sandy is a wonderful girl.
849
00:41:03,140 --> 00:41:05,530
Then you can realize how this whole thing started.
850
00:41:05,530 --> 00:41:08,950
Keep away from me or so help me I'll belt you.
851
00:41:08,950 --> 00:41:11,050
You'll belt me, that's a switch.
852
00:41:11,050 --> 00:41:12,770
You wind up with my wife and you hit me?
853
00:41:12,770 --> 00:41:15,863
Me and Sandy? Why you dirty.
854
00:41:18,374 --> 00:41:21,291
(crowd applauding)
855
00:41:27,504 --> 00:41:29,683
♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪
856
00:41:29,683 --> 00:41:32,003
♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪
857
00:41:32,003 --> 00:41:35,533
♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪
858
00:41:35,533 --> 00:41:38,151
♪ Which nobody can deny ♪
859
00:41:38,151 --> 00:41:41,068
(crowd applauding)
860
00:41:43,873 --> 00:41:46,664
Send me a big one. I want it for a calendar.
861
00:41:46,664 --> 00:41:49,864
(group laughing)
862
00:41:49,864 --> 00:41:51,622
Oh, look at that, isn't that-
863
00:41:51,622 --> 00:41:53,160
Oh, don't bother to count them darling,
864
00:41:53,160 --> 00:41:54,710
I'll keep your secret.
865
00:41:54,710 --> 00:41:57,040
I didn't know you were gonna do this, too.
866
00:41:57,040 --> 00:41:58,763
Jeff and I have something for you.
867
00:41:58,763 --> 00:41:59,810
I can't wait.
868
00:41:59,810 --> 00:42:01,460
Happy birthday, to you from us.
869
00:42:02,840 --> 00:42:04,733
Oh, it's marvelous.
870
00:42:06,480 --> 00:42:08,040
You shouldn't have really given me anything.
871
00:42:08,040 --> 00:42:10,570
He's absolutely right.
872
00:42:10,570 --> 00:42:12,660
Oh, Jeff, behave yourself.
873
00:42:12,660 --> 00:42:16,240
He's a perfect physical specimen, isn't he, Claire?
874
00:42:16,240 --> 00:42:18,610
A wife can't testify against her husband.
875
00:42:18,610 --> 00:42:20,670
Next you'll wanna examine my teeth.
876
00:42:20,670 --> 00:42:22,380
Hey that's a good idea, may I?
877
00:42:22,380 --> 00:42:24,870
Oh, Jeff, why are you so interested
878
00:42:24,870 --> 00:42:26,810
in dentistry all of the sudden?
879
00:42:26,810 --> 00:42:28,340
It isn't all of a sudden.
880
00:42:28,340 --> 00:42:32,000
I had an uncle who was a crendly friendly dentist,
881
00:42:32,000 --> 00:42:33,920
he was a friendly credit...
882
00:42:33,920 --> 00:42:36,950
Anyway, I inherited my interest from him.
883
00:42:36,950 --> 00:42:39,470
You believe in heredity, don't you, King?
884
00:42:39,470 --> 00:42:41,470
Of course, very possible.
885
00:42:41,470 --> 00:42:44,073
Good, so do I. Take off your shoe.
886
00:42:45,380 --> 00:42:46,490
Go ahead, I just did.
887
00:42:46,490 --> 00:42:47,980
I'm quite comfortable, thanks.
888
00:42:47,980 --> 00:42:49,130
Come on, take 'em off,
889
00:42:49,130 --> 00:42:51,290
we can learn a lot from the Orientals.
890
00:42:51,290 --> 00:42:54,893
I take mine off every day, solid comfort.
891
00:42:56,190 --> 00:42:59,309
Cut it out, I don't wanna take off my shoes.
892
00:42:59,309 --> 00:43:01,026
He's got a hole in his sock.
893
00:43:01,026 --> 00:43:02,455
I think he's got a hole in his head.
894
00:43:02,455 --> 00:43:04,682
He has no sock.He's got a hole in his sock
895
00:43:04,682 --> 00:43:07,554
and doesn't want anybody to know about it.
896
00:43:07,554 --> 00:43:09,910
For Pete's sake, all right.
897
00:43:09,910 --> 00:43:11,800
He's really smashed.
898
00:43:11,800 --> 00:43:16,260
Liquor like fire, a good servant but a bad master.
899
00:43:16,260 --> 00:43:18,347
King puts things so well.
900
00:43:18,347 --> 00:43:20,980
Oh, yes, he's always thinking.
901
00:43:20,980 --> 00:43:24,060
He's got perfect arches, perfect, that's great.
902
00:43:24,060 --> 00:43:26,300
What's so great about normal feet?
903
00:43:26,300 --> 00:43:28,050
Jeff, Jeff, I think I have something in my eye,
904
00:43:28,050 --> 00:43:29,830
could you aid me?
905
00:43:29,830 --> 00:43:30,990
She wants me to aid her,
906
00:43:30,990 --> 00:43:33,483
that means I'm gonna get something in my eye.
907
00:43:35,210 --> 00:43:36,900
Honey cut it out, you know how sensitive
908
00:43:36,900 --> 00:43:38,360
King is about his looks.
909
00:43:38,360 --> 00:43:40,820
Now you can sit there and talk to him about anything,
910
00:43:40,820 --> 00:43:42,313
anything but his appearance.
911
00:43:45,670 --> 00:43:47,882
She's absolutely right.
912
00:43:47,882 --> 00:43:52,183
King, any insanity in your family?
913
00:43:52,183 --> 00:43:53,016
Jeff!
914
00:43:53,016 --> 00:43:55,543
That's all right, Sandy, he's just joking.
915
00:43:55,543 --> 00:43:57,493
That's right, Sandy, I'm just joking.
916
00:43:58,470 --> 00:43:59,990
Is there?
917
00:43:59,990 --> 00:44:03,853
No, but I've got a friend I'm not too sure of.
918
00:44:03,853 --> 00:44:06,443
I better help you back on with your shoe.
919
00:44:08,858 --> 00:44:10,490
(Jeff groans)
920
00:44:10,490 --> 00:44:12,980
I'm sorry, old boy, I didn't mean to do that.
921
00:44:12,980 --> 00:44:16,123
That's all right. He has perfect reflexes, perfect.
922
00:44:17,383 --> 00:44:18,450
(Jeff laughing)
923
00:44:18,450 --> 00:44:20,850
If you two boys are through playing footsies,
924
00:44:20,850 --> 00:44:22,700
I'd like to dance.
925
00:44:22,700 --> 00:44:24,800
Good idea. I'll dance with you, Claire.
926
00:44:24,800 --> 00:44:26,780
King, would you dance with Sandy?
927
00:44:27,773 --> 00:44:29,521
Come on, Claire, up and at 'em.
928
00:44:29,521 --> 00:44:31,380
I gotta get my shoes.
929
00:44:31,380 --> 00:44:32,280
Never mind your shoes.
930
00:44:32,280 --> 00:44:33,876
I guess you're stuck with me.
931
00:44:33,876 --> 00:44:35,090
Or be bound to sit.
932
00:44:35,090 --> 00:44:36,403
On my birthday?
933
00:44:37,903 --> 00:44:41,403
(gentle orchestral music)
934
00:44:59,720 --> 00:45:01,460
I never saw him act this way before.
935
00:45:01,460 --> 00:45:03,720
Oh, he's just exhilarated. (laughs)
936
00:45:03,720 --> 00:45:05,276
What do you suppose got into him?
937
00:45:05,276 --> 00:45:07,033
I'd say about a quart.
938
00:45:07,033 --> 00:45:10,533
(gentle orchestral music)
939
00:45:18,692 --> 00:45:20,597
Oh, oh, oh.
940
00:45:20,597 --> 00:45:22,664
I'm sorry, I didn't mean that.
941
00:45:22,664 --> 00:45:23,497
Oh, it's all right.
942
00:45:23,497 --> 00:45:25,863
Plenty more toes where that came from.
943
00:45:25,863 --> 00:45:28,780
I'm a clumsy clod and I can't do anything right.
944
00:45:28,780 --> 00:45:30,920
Oh, I don't know about that.
945
00:45:30,920 --> 00:45:32,420
You drink a pretty mean drink.
946
00:45:33,840 --> 00:45:35,393
Thanks, I don't mind if I do.
947
00:45:36,488 --> 00:45:37,988
Excuse me, please.
948
00:45:43,303 --> 00:45:46,290
Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention please?
949
00:45:46,290 --> 00:45:47,990
Ladies and gentlemen, with a little encouragement
950
00:45:47,990 --> 00:45:50,630
from all of us, I think we can persuade Sandy,
951
00:45:50,630 --> 00:45:52,720
who is the wife of King's best friend,
952
00:45:52,720 --> 00:45:53,670
to sing a little song for us.
953
00:45:53,670 --> 00:45:55,128
Now, let's have a hand for Sandy, right?
954
00:45:55,128 --> 00:45:58,045
(crowd applauding)
955
00:45:59,444 --> 00:46:01,388
"Promise Her Anything."
956
00:46:01,388 --> 00:46:04,471
(bright piano music)
957
00:46:05,527 --> 00:46:09,698
♪ Promise her anything ♪
958
00:46:09,698 --> 00:46:13,658
♪ If you're in love ♪
959
00:46:13,658 --> 00:46:17,437
♪ Promise her anything ♪
960
00:46:17,437 --> 00:46:22,068
♪ If you care ♪
961
00:46:22,068 --> 00:46:27,068
♪ True love comes but once so they say ♪
962
00:46:28,698 --> 00:46:33,698
♪ When you find it, don't let it slip away ♪
963
00:46:35,118 --> 00:46:39,348
♪ Oh, promise her everything ♪
964
00:46:39,348 --> 00:46:43,028
♪ Everything grand ♪
965
00:46:43,028 --> 00:46:46,527
♪ And if she's right for you ♪
966
00:46:46,527 --> 00:46:50,666
♪ She'll understand ♪
967
00:46:50,666 --> 00:46:55,666
♪ So go to her, a woman instinctively knows ♪
968
00:46:56,866 --> 00:46:59,897
♪ Yes, promise her anything ♪
969
00:46:59,897 --> 00:47:03,314
♪ In love, anything goes ♪
970
00:47:09,838 --> 00:47:12,755
(crowd applauding)
971
00:47:13,889 --> 00:47:17,306
("Promise Her Anything")
972
00:47:20,577 --> 00:47:23,160
Look at her, she's beautiful.
973
00:47:25,038 --> 00:47:26,297
Right.
974
00:47:26,297 --> 00:47:29,714
("Promise Her Anything")
975
00:47:44,838 --> 00:47:47,457
I'm not good enough for her, that's all.
976
00:47:47,457 --> 00:47:49,089
Right.
977
00:47:49,089 --> 00:47:52,506
("Promise Her Anything")
978
00:47:59,146 --> 00:48:02,297
♪ Oh, promise her anything ♪
979
00:48:02,297 --> 00:48:05,714
♪ In love, anything goes ♪
980
00:48:12,672 --> 00:48:15,589
(crowd applauding)
981
00:48:22,897 --> 00:48:24,206
Mr. Brooks, Mr. Brooks.
982
00:48:24,206 --> 00:48:26,140
I'll, I'll have a double.Mr. Brooks.
983
00:48:26,140 --> 00:48:28,490
I'll have, I didn't mean anything by it.
984
00:48:28,490 --> 00:48:30,049
Now, that's all right.Oh, oh.
985
00:48:30,049 --> 00:48:31,419
Come on.I'm sorry, I was just-
986
00:48:31,419 --> 00:48:32,252
There you go.
987
00:48:32,252 --> 00:48:33,497
Um, it's really not necessary, I'm-
988
00:48:33,497 --> 00:48:34,970
Are you sure you're all right?
989
00:48:34,970 --> 00:48:36,140
I'm fine.Goodnight.
990
00:48:36,140 --> 00:48:39,950
(Jeff thudding on floor)
991
00:48:39,950 --> 00:48:41,586
Sandy doesn't know.
992
00:48:41,586 --> 00:48:43,537
She doesn't know what I did.
993
00:48:43,537 --> 00:48:47,163
But she's gotta know, a marriage has to be based on trust.
994
00:48:48,228 --> 00:48:50,360
I've gotta tell her, I've gotta come right out
995
00:48:50,360 --> 00:48:52,146
like a man and tell her what I did.
996
00:48:52,146 --> 00:48:54,729
(dreamy music)
997
00:48:55,970 --> 00:48:57,170
Do you want something?
998
00:49:01,189 --> 00:49:03,038
See you later.
999
00:49:03,038 --> 00:49:05,470
Sandy, you're gorgeous.
1000
00:49:05,470 --> 00:49:08,027
Oh, Jeff, you're trying too hard, darling.
1001
00:49:08,027 --> 00:49:10,736
Sweetheart, I love you more than life itself.
1002
00:49:10,736 --> 00:49:12,180
Do you really?
1003
00:49:12,180 --> 00:49:13,390
Oh, darling, you wanted a baby,
1004
00:49:13,390 --> 00:49:14,900
I wanted you to have a baby.
1005
00:49:14,900 --> 00:49:17,140
I never intended it to work out like this.
1006
00:49:17,140 --> 00:49:19,330
But King's a healthy guy.
1007
00:49:19,330 --> 00:49:23,030
I look at it like this, we're modern, sophisticated adults,
1008
00:49:23,030 --> 00:49:24,030
whatever happened has happened,
1009
00:49:24,030 --> 00:49:26,464
and there's nothing we can do about it.
1010
00:49:26,464 --> 00:49:29,881
(light orchestral music)
1011
00:49:52,091 --> 00:49:55,008
(people clamoring)
1012
00:50:05,492 --> 00:50:06,575
Look, look.
1013
00:50:07,502 --> 00:50:09,807
Oh, what divine zombie glasses.
1014
00:50:09,807 --> 00:50:11,833
Those are baby bottles.
1015
00:50:12,720 --> 00:50:15,885
Come on now, open mine next, dear heart.
1016
00:50:15,885 --> 00:50:17,350
Come on baby, let me get through there,
1017
00:50:17,350 --> 00:50:18,923
come on girls, clear out.
1018
00:50:20,893 --> 00:50:22,142
There we go.
1019
00:50:22,142 --> 00:50:23,527
Oh, Babbette, you really shouldn't have.
1020
00:50:23,527 --> 00:50:25,178
Oh, I got carried away, you know.
1021
00:50:25,178 --> 00:50:27,018
(women gasping)
1022
00:50:27,018 --> 00:50:28,768
Oh, fun wigs, look!
1023
00:50:31,550 --> 00:50:32,770
What if it's a boy?
1024
00:50:32,770 --> 00:50:34,250
I have a blue one, sweetie.
1025
00:50:34,250 --> 00:50:36,130
(all laughing)
1026
00:50:36,130 --> 00:50:38,370
Now, if you decide to let it come in natural,
1027
00:50:38,370 --> 00:50:39,950
you can always wear one of these.
1028
00:50:39,950 --> 00:50:41,597
I am gonna let it come in natural.
1029
00:50:41,597 --> 00:50:42,981
(all laughing)
1030
00:50:42,981 --> 00:50:44,308
Would you like me to model it?
1031
00:50:44,308 --> 00:50:45,770
Oh, I would love it.Yes.
1032
00:50:45,770 --> 00:50:48,482
Look girls, Babbette's gonna change his coiffure.
1033
00:50:48,482 --> 00:50:50,110
(women laughing)
1034
00:50:50,110 --> 00:50:51,519
Oh, here, darling.
1035
00:50:51,519 --> 00:50:52,860
(women laughing)
1036
00:50:52,860 --> 00:50:54,937
Now remember your condition, honey.
1037
00:50:55,990 --> 00:50:57,852
If it bites me, I'm gonna kill it.
1038
00:50:57,852 --> 00:50:59,500
Okay.
(women laughing)
1039
00:50:59,500 --> 00:51:00,463
She kills me, too.
1040
00:51:01,700 --> 00:51:03,660
Now I'd like to show you girls
1041
00:51:03,660 --> 00:51:07,753
how a wig can completely transform your personality.
1042
00:51:08,993 --> 00:51:10,379
There we go.
1043
00:51:10,379 --> 00:51:11,216
Now, Miss Snavely,
1044
00:51:11,216 --> 00:51:12,656
may I borrow that?
Yes, you certainly may.
1045
00:51:12,656 --> 00:51:13,489
I want it back though.
Oh, thank you.
1046
00:51:13,489 --> 00:51:16,136
(Babbette laughs)
(women laughing)
1047
00:51:16,136 --> 00:51:20,170
Oh, darlings, it's absolutely divine of you
1048
00:51:20,170 --> 00:51:22,543
to invite me on your little soiree.
1049
00:51:23,990 --> 00:51:28,040
I'm adrift you know, I just closed my latest play
1050
00:51:28,040 --> 00:51:31,150
in New York, I thought it would be a tour de force,
1051
00:51:31,150 --> 00:51:32,997
however, I was forced to tour.
1052
00:51:32,997 --> 00:51:34,790
(women laughing)
1053
00:51:34,790 --> 00:51:36,186
Oh, what a bore.
1054
00:51:36,186 --> 00:51:37,706
(women clapping)
1055
00:51:37,706 --> 00:51:41,503
What, now, we have glasses, identification,
1056
00:51:42,420 --> 00:51:45,220
a darling, darling red one this time.
1057
00:51:45,220 --> 00:51:47,567
It's pretty.Ooh, I like that.
1058
00:51:49,140 --> 00:51:52,991
I should like to read a nursery rhyme for you.
1059
00:51:52,991 --> 00:51:55,370
(women clapping)
1060
00:51:55,370 --> 00:51:56,370
Oh, Betty.
1061
00:51:57,397 --> 00:52:01,950
Little Miss Muffett sat on a tuffet,
1062
00:52:01,950 --> 00:52:04,930
eating her curds and whey.
1063
00:52:06,330 --> 00:52:11,330
There came a big spider and sat down beside her,
1064
00:52:11,420 --> 00:52:16,420
and said, I haven't had decent curds and whey
1065
00:52:16,830 --> 00:52:18,752
since they closed Romanoff's.
1066
00:52:18,752 --> 00:52:21,060
(women laughing)
1067
00:52:21,060 --> 00:52:22,477
Was that one fun?
1068
00:52:24,262 --> 00:52:27,540
Now, for this next one I need a little production.
1069
00:52:27,540 --> 00:52:28,373
May I have that over there?
1070
00:52:28,373 --> 00:52:29,920
You may.Thank you, dear.
1071
00:52:29,920 --> 00:52:31,662
Now, will you darlings make a little curtain for me?
1072
00:52:31,662 --> 00:52:33,424
A little curtain.Sure.
1073
00:52:33,424 --> 00:52:34,643
Kind of a puppet theater
1074
00:52:34,643 --> 00:52:35,523
aren't you?
Yes.
1075
00:52:35,523 --> 00:52:37,231
(women laughing)
1076
00:52:37,231 --> 00:52:38,148
Up we go.
1077
00:52:40,160 --> 00:52:43,433
All right, ready, curtain.
1078
00:52:46,040 --> 00:52:47,438
Hello, everybody.
1079
00:52:47,438 --> 00:52:50,462
(woman clamoring)
1080
00:52:50,462 --> 00:52:51,962
Jayne Mansfield.
1081
00:52:53,410 --> 00:52:57,220
Has everyone seen my beautiful new present?
1082
00:52:57,220 --> 00:52:59,203
It's diamond-studded.
1083
00:53:01,290 --> 00:53:04,483
It's a diaper for the baby that has everything.
1084
00:53:05,860 --> 00:53:09,340
Now, let's see if I know how to fold it.
1085
00:53:09,340 --> 00:53:10,527
Oh, there.
1086
00:53:12,200 --> 00:53:14,313
Isn't that just too perfect?
1087
00:53:14,313 --> 00:53:15,593
(women laughing)
1088
00:53:15,593 --> 00:53:16,593
I can do her, too.
1089
00:53:17,560 --> 00:53:20,020
Isn't that just, (gasps) too perfect, it's-
1090
00:53:20,020 --> 00:53:22,301
[Sandy And Babbette] Diamond-studded.
1091
00:53:22,301 --> 00:53:23,990
(women clapping)
1092
00:53:23,990 --> 00:53:25,857
Oh, Sandy, never stop.
1093
00:53:37,834 --> 00:53:40,060
Oh, I've been looking all over for you.
1094
00:53:40,060 --> 00:53:41,157
Five scotch and sodas, please.
1095
00:53:41,157 --> 00:53:42,480
Hiya Doc, have a drink?
1096
00:53:42,480 --> 00:53:44,957
Oh, dear me, it's a little early in the day
1097
00:53:44,957 --> 00:53:46,600
for that, isn't it?
1098
00:53:46,600 --> 00:53:48,480
I hate a clock watcher.
1099
00:53:48,480 --> 00:53:52,070
Mr. Brooks, you are a lucky man.
1100
00:53:52,070 --> 00:53:53,790
How do you figure that out, Doc?
1101
00:53:55,270 --> 00:53:56,770
I examined your wife this morning.
1102
00:53:56,770 --> 00:54:00,630
There's absolutely no doubt about it this time,
1103
00:54:00,630 --> 00:54:02,603
you're going to be a father.
1104
00:54:03,510 --> 00:54:04,370
More or less.
1105
00:54:04,370 --> 00:54:06,990
Of course I didn't let her see that I was surprised.
1106
00:54:06,990 --> 00:54:07,823
I let her go on thinking
1107
00:54:07,823 --> 00:54:10,460
that it was true two weeks ago when you told her.
1108
00:54:10,460 --> 00:54:13,330
Obviously, my pills worked.
1109
00:54:13,330 --> 00:54:14,823
Obviously.
1110
00:54:14,823 --> 00:54:15,670
Quack.
I beg pardon?
1111
00:54:15,670 --> 00:54:17,823
I didn't say anything. Have a drink.
1112
00:54:17,823 --> 00:54:19,180
Oh, no, no thanks.
1113
00:54:19,180 --> 00:54:21,460
I knew you could do it, I knew it!
1114
00:54:21,460 --> 00:54:22,510
Thanks, Doc. Quack.
1115
00:54:23,950 --> 00:54:25,557
Oh, well, merci.
1116
00:54:26,778 --> 00:54:29,900
Quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack.
1117
00:54:29,900 --> 00:54:31,160
Don't worry dear heart,
1118
00:54:31,160 --> 00:54:33,047
I'll reset the wigs for you.
1119
00:54:33,047 --> 00:54:35,028
Oh, just then he was marvelous.
1120
00:54:35,028 --> 00:54:36,155
I'll see you later, honey.Thank you.
1121
00:54:36,155 --> 00:54:37,617
Thank you, everyone.
1122
00:54:37,617 --> 00:54:40,840
Thank you, dear heart.Thank you so much, oh.
1123
00:54:40,840 --> 00:54:43,238
Hope you like the teddy bear I gave you.
1124
00:54:43,238 --> 00:54:46,917
Oh, darling, wasn't that fun?
1125
00:54:46,917 --> 00:54:49,080
Wasn't it fun?Wonderful.
1126
00:54:49,080 --> 00:54:51,383
Did you ever see so many beautiful presents?
1127
00:54:52,220 --> 00:54:53,750
Wonderful.
1128
00:54:53,750 --> 00:54:55,257
Oh, thank you, thank you.
1129
00:54:55,257 --> 00:54:56,090
Now don't forget,
1130
00:54:56,090 --> 00:54:57,988
we've got hair appointments this afternoon.
1131
00:54:57,988 --> 00:54:59,307
I won't forget, and this is yours.
1132
00:54:59,307 --> 00:55:00,938
Oh, yeah, bye.
1133
00:55:00,938 --> 00:55:01,771
Bye.
1134
00:55:06,040 --> 00:55:08,367
How was the shower?
1135
00:55:08,367 --> 00:55:09,908
Wonderful.
1136
00:55:09,908 --> 00:55:11,213
It stank.
1137
00:55:11,213 --> 00:55:13,613
I've never seen so many lovely presents.
1138
00:55:14,550 --> 00:55:16,150
She's up to her ears in junk.
1139
00:55:16,150 --> 00:55:18,113
And you should've seen the girls.
1140
00:55:19,840 --> 00:55:22,960
And those broads, every time she opened a gift,
1141
00:55:22,960 --> 00:55:27,863
it was oohs and aahs and how cute and how divine.
1142
00:55:28,780 --> 00:55:30,460
How nauseating.
1143
00:55:30,460 --> 00:55:31,743
You're getting fat.
1144
00:55:33,123 --> 00:55:33,956
I know it.
1145
00:55:33,956 --> 00:55:35,890
You're jealous.
1146
00:55:35,890 --> 00:55:38,303
I am not, and you shut up.
1147
00:55:44,640 --> 00:55:46,283
You don't love me anymore.
1148
00:55:47,230 --> 00:55:49,420
It's been a month since I've seen you sober enough
1149
00:55:49,420 --> 00:55:50,680
to think about it.
1150
00:55:50,680 --> 00:55:54,453
Ooh, King never gets drunk, does he?
1151
00:55:55,420 --> 00:55:58,270
No, he doesn't.
1152
00:55:58,270 --> 00:56:00,837
You sound just like your mother.
1153
00:56:00,837 --> 00:56:02,608
That's a nasty remark.
1154
00:56:02,608 --> 00:56:04,520
(Jeff laughs)
1155
00:56:04,520 --> 00:56:07,306
And you meant it to be nasty.
1156
00:56:07,306 --> 00:56:09,670
You know something, my own true love,
1157
00:56:09,670 --> 00:56:11,913
you sound just like her, too.
1158
00:56:12,768 --> 00:56:15,630
For your information, my mother is going to meet us
1159
00:56:15,630 --> 00:56:19,230
in New York, are you going to let her see you like this?
1160
00:56:19,230 --> 00:56:20,153
If she's good.
1161
00:56:25,660 --> 00:56:29,200
I'm not supposed to get upset, so don't upset me.
1162
00:56:29,200 --> 00:56:31,080
If you wanna drink yourself silly, go right ahead.
1163
00:56:31,080 --> 00:56:32,376
I do.Leave me alone.
1164
00:56:32,376 --> 00:56:33,793
Oh, oh, toodle.
1165
00:56:44,130 --> 00:56:46,190
Why don't you wear glasses?
1166
00:56:46,190 --> 00:56:47,103
Don't be silly.
1167
00:56:48,968 --> 00:56:50,093
For once, why don't you admit
1168
00:56:50,093 --> 00:56:52,267
that you're not completely perfect?
1169
00:56:52,267 --> 00:56:55,020
We are nasty today, huh?
1170
00:56:55,020 --> 00:56:57,710
No, I'm just fed up with everything.
1171
00:56:57,710 --> 00:57:00,880
Claire, what's getting to you all of the sudden?
1172
00:57:00,880 --> 00:57:03,360
Now look, don't you start defending her.
1173
00:57:03,360 --> 00:57:04,193
Who?
1174
00:57:05,310 --> 00:57:06,840
Don't pull that innocent act with me,
1175
00:57:06,840 --> 00:57:08,680
you know darn well who.
1176
00:57:08,680 --> 00:57:10,320
What did I say?
1177
00:57:10,320 --> 00:57:11,740
You don't have to say anything,
1178
00:57:11,740 --> 00:57:12,960
I know what you're thinking.
1179
00:57:12,960 --> 00:57:14,943
Just how many kids are you expecting?
1180
00:57:14,943 --> 00:57:16,590
What do you mean by that?
1181
00:57:16,590 --> 00:57:19,190
My mind happened to be an absolute blank
1182
00:57:19,190 --> 00:57:20,023
if you wanna know.
1183
00:57:20,023 --> 00:57:21,220
Look at all this junk.
1184
00:57:21,220 --> 00:57:24,720
Your mind's always a blank when it comes to me.
1185
00:57:24,720 --> 00:57:27,790
Maybe it's because I'm not collecting bottle warmers
1186
00:57:27,790 --> 00:57:30,340
like little Mother Machree in there.
1187
00:57:30,340 --> 00:57:32,943
And you oughta see that layette she's collected.
1188
00:57:33,860 --> 00:57:37,660
If it isn't all cashmere, it's yak's hair.
1189
00:57:37,660 --> 00:57:39,180
That kid'll be seven years old
1190
00:57:39,180 --> 00:57:40,650
before it gets over the itch.
1191
00:57:40,650 --> 00:57:42,080
Well, don't climb on me about it,
1192
00:57:42,080 --> 00:57:44,150
I had nothing to do with her baby.
1193
00:57:44,150 --> 00:57:45,260
Flares.
1194
00:57:45,260 --> 00:57:46,093
Look at this.
1195
00:57:46,093 --> 00:57:48,830
The kid's gonna be smothered in all this fuzz.
1196
00:57:48,830 --> 00:57:50,790
I don't know what's the matter with you.
1197
00:57:50,790 --> 00:57:51,623
Give me that.
1198
00:57:51,623 --> 00:57:54,533
Oh, I suppose King would never say anything like that,
1199
00:57:54,533 --> 00:57:55,733
would he, would he?
1200
00:57:55,733 --> 00:57:59,580
I suppose Sandy would never be nasty, would she?
1201
00:57:59,580 --> 00:58:01,550
Stop knocking my friend.
1202
00:58:01,550 --> 00:58:04,370
I think I'll go out and get some fresh air.
1203
00:58:04,370 --> 00:58:05,203
Bring some back.
1204
00:58:05,203 --> 00:58:06,036
Ho, ho, ho.
1205
00:58:09,010 --> 00:58:11,960
It's getting stuffy in here. I'm going out.
1206
00:58:11,960 --> 00:58:14,020
I wish you'd just go away and leave me alone.
1207
00:58:14,020 --> 00:58:16,020
If you're so miserable with me,
1208
00:58:16,020 --> 00:58:18,030
why don't we just call it quits?
1209
00:58:18,030 --> 00:58:18,863
Okay.
1210
00:58:18,863 --> 00:58:21,300
If you wanna divorce, you've got it!
1211
00:58:25,678 --> 00:58:27,580
We were just talking about you.
1212
00:58:27,580 --> 00:58:28,500
So were we.
1213
00:58:40,600 --> 00:58:42,173
Read any good labels lately?
1214
00:58:43,046 --> 00:58:45,498
Mm, hmm, hmm, hmm.
1215
00:58:45,498 --> 00:58:48,998
(gentle orchestral music)
1216
00:58:56,047 --> 00:58:57,800
[Jeff Voiceover] If she only knew.
1217
00:58:57,800 --> 00:59:01,100
But nobody knows, just me.
1218
00:59:01,100 --> 00:59:03,220
Sandy's gotta know, though.
1219
00:59:03,220 --> 00:59:05,630
You can't build a marriage on a lie.
1220
00:59:05,630 --> 00:59:07,123
Not a lie like that.
1221
00:59:08,130 --> 00:59:11,097
Sooner or later, I've got to tell her.
1222
00:59:11,097 --> 00:59:14,514
(light orchestral music)
1223
00:59:24,670 --> 00:59:25,897
Do you want something?
1224
00:59:29,375 --> 00:59:30,542
See you later.
1225
00:59:31,833 --> 00:59:34,057
Darling, the time has come.
1226
00:59:34,057 --> 00:59:37,370
Dinner won't be ready for another 15 minutes.
1227
00:59:37,370 --> 00:59:38,810
Sweetheart, forget dinner.
1228
00:59:38,810 --> 00:59:41,650
I've come to talk to you about our child.
1229
00:59:41,650 --> 00:59:45,973
Oh, isn't he the most precious little baby?
1230
00:59:45,973 --> 00:59:47,830
Yeah, he's precious all right,
1231
00:59:47,830 --> 00:59:49,633
but what would you say if I told you
1232
00:59:49,633 --> 00:59:52,742
that that child isn't mine?
1233
00:59:52,742 --> 00:59:54,470
Well, of course he's yours Jeff,
1234
00:59:54,470 --> 00:59:57,052
it says so right on the birth certificate.
1235
00:59:57,052 --> 00:59:58,840
Forget the birth certificate.
1236
00:59:58,840 --> 01:00:02,607
That child's real father is King, King (yelling) Banner.
1237
01:00:04,989 --> 01:00:07,520
Oh, darling, you're just upset.
1238
01:00:07,520 --> 01:00:11,030
Here, I've prepared for you a little drink.
1239
01:00:11,030 --> 01:00:13,650
Oh, you don't believe me.
1240
01:00:13,650 --> 01:00:16,500
Yes, I do believe you, I've always believed you,
1241
01:00:16,500 --> 01:00:18,960
that's because you've never lied to me.
1242
01:00:18,960 --> 01:00:21,757
You're too good. To us.
1243
01:00:21,757 --> 01:00:23,325
To us.
1244
01:00:23,325 --> 01:00:25,100
(Jeff yelling)
1245
01:00:25,100 --> 01:00:26,953
What did you put in that drink?
1246
01:00:26,953 --> 01:00:29,240
Oh, just a pill, darling.
1247
01:00:29,240 --> 01:00:31,840
You know all about pills and drinks.
1248
01:00:31,840 --> 01:00:34,383
Ah, you couldn't, you didn't, you couldn't!
1249
01:00:36,717 --> 01:00:39,130
(Jeff yelling)
1250
01:00:39,130 --> 01:00:40,213
Couldn't I?
1251
01:00:42,348 --> 01:00:45,637
Poor little baby, as if we didn't know.
1252
01:00:47,676 --> 01:00:48,509
Mm-hmm.
1253
01:00:52,419 --> 01:00:54,479
You look awful.
1254
01:00:54,479 --> 01:00:55,312
I thought we were going to have to
1255
01:00:55,312 --> 01:00:57,740
slide you over the side at daybreak.
1256
01:00:57,740 --> 01:00:59,923
They say it's the only way to go.
1257
01:01:01,055 --> 01:01:01,888
Want a drink?
1258
01:01:01,888 --> 01:01:03,033
No thanks.
1259
01:01:04,110 --> 01:01:06,310
You're mad at me, too.
1260
01:01:06,310 --> 01:01:07,478
No, I'm not.
1261
01:01:07,478 --> 01:01:09,480
(boat horn blaring)
1262
01:01:09,480 --> 01:01:11,030
Wonder where that ship's going.
1263
01:01:15,660 --> 01:01:16,493
Down.
1264
01:01:18,240 --> 01:01:21,493
Enough of this. I'll buy you a cup of black coffee.
1265
01:01:22,530 --> 01:01:24,750
Claire, I wanna talk to you.
1266
01:01:24,750 --> 01:01:28,433
Sure, after a nice cup of black strong coffee.
1267
01:01:28,433 --> 01:01:30,263
What a revolting idea.
1268
01:01:31,675 --> 01:01:33,030
More coffee, sir?
1269
01:01:33,030 --> 01:01:34,063
No, no thanks.
1270
01:01:37,810 --> 01:01:39,670
Now, you were saying?
1271
01:01:39,670 --> 01:01:41,910
Think back to the night I bumped my head.
1272
01:01:41,910 --> 01:01:44,680
Do you remember anything unusual about it?
1273
01:01:44,680 --> 01:01:46,780
Well, it was quite a bump, what about it?
1274
01:01:46,780 --> 01:01:48,825
No, I'm talking about you and me.
1275
01:01:48,825 --> 01:01:50,603
Remember what happened to us.
1276
01:01:51,730 --> 01:01:54,660
Well, as I recall, we spent the night together.
1277
01:01:54,660 --> 01:01:57,310
Right, and I was knocked out.
1278
01:01:57,310 --> 01:01:59,355
But what did we do?
1279
01:01:59,355 --> 01:02:03,103
Well, I just told you, honey, we spent the night together.
1280
01:02:03,103 --> 01:02:05,353
Oh, Claire, come with me.
1281
01:02:08,137 --> 01:02:10,894
Uh, perhaps madame would like mince pie.
1282
01:02:10,894 --> 01:02:13,043
Oh, I'd love it.
1283
01:02:13,043 --> 01:02:16,990
But if I ate anything so rich, it'd probably kill me.
1284
01:02:16,990 --> 01:02:19,000
She'll have the mince pie.
1285
01:02:19,000 --> 01:02:22,193
Oh, Tulio, you're so good to me.
1286
01:02:23,214 --> 01:02:24,663
The doctor said I shouldn't.
1287
01:02:26,486 --> 01:02:27,497
A la mode.
1288
01:02:27,497 --> 01:02:30,080
(jaunty music)
1289
01:02:36,110 --> 01:02:37,063
Now do you remember?
1290
01:02:37,063 --> 01:02:39,540
I remember falling asleep in here.
1291
01:02:39,540 --> 01:02:40,990
But before you fell asleep.
1292
01:02:42,410 --> 01:02:43,940
I remember giving you a pill.
1293
01:02:43,940 --> 01:02:47,527
Right. Now, did you make love to me?
1294
01:02:47,527 --> 01:02:49,610
Did I make love to you?
1295
01:02:49,610 --> 01:02:50,770
I like the way you put that.
1296
01:02:50,770 --> 01:02:51,960
Did you?
1297
01:02:51,960 --> 01:02:53,655
You're out of your mind.
1298
01:02:53,655 --> 01:02:55,620
Claire, really, listen.
1299
01:02:55,620 --> 01:02:58,160
Darling, you are serious.
1300
01:02:58,160 --> 01:03:00,880
It's driving me crazy. At times I almost remember it.
1301
01:03:00,880 --> 01:03:03,890
Then like now it seems like, like a dream.
1302
01:03:03,890 --> 01:03:05,240
Was I fascinating?
1303
01:03:05,240 --> 01:03:06,223
Overwhelming.
1304
01:03:07,170 --> 01:03:08,530
You're an idiot.
1305
01:03:08,530 --> 01:03:11,535
In the first place, I'm not casual with my favors.
1306
01:03:11,535 --> 01:03:14,035
(door clicks)
1307
01:03:20,735 --> 01:03:22,090
And in the second place, the doctor
1308
01:03:22,090 --> 01:03:23,500
was right there with us all night.
1309
01:03:23,500 --> 01:03:25,100
What was he doing, selling tickets?
1310
01:03:25,100 --> 01:03:26,430
He wasn't there.
1311
01:03:26,430 --> 01:03:27,670
He was too there.
1312
01:03:27,670 --> 01:03:29,010
He was not there.
1313
01:03:29,010 --> 01:03:30,710
And what about my wife and your husband?
1314
01:03:30,710 --> 01:03:32,033
They were selling tickets.
1315
01:03:41,100 --> 01:03:43,780
They were off dancing or something somewhere, weren't they?
1316
01:03:43,780 --> 01:03:44,613
All night?
1317
01:03:46,380 --> 01:03:47,213
Come to think of it,
1318
01:03:47,213 --> 01:03:49,970
he never has mentioned that night to me.
1319
01:03:49,970 --> 01:03:51,580
Not once.
1320
01:03:51,580 --> 01:03:53,890
Claire, you oughta know everything.
1321
01:03:53,890 --> 01:03:56,050
Are you putting me on?
1322
01:03:56,050 --> 01:03:57,970
I hope to cut out my tongue after I tell you this,
1323
01:03:57,970 --> 01:03:59,990
so I'll never be able to repeat it.
1324
01:03:59,990 --> 01:04:01,159
King was-
1325
01:04:01,159 --> 01:04:03,992
(whimsical music)
1326
01:04:29,476 --> 01:04:32,790
King? Sandy and King?
1327
01:04:32,790 --> 01:04:35,330
Go ahead, whatever you say, I deserve it.
1328
01:04:35,330 --> 01:04:36,163
What's so funny?
1329
01:04:36,163 --> 01:04:39,223
Oh, oh if you only knew.
1330
01:04:41,530 --> 01:04:44,260
Look, Jeff, why is this so important to you?
1331
01:04:44,260 --> 01:04:46,620
Why? You want your own baby, that's why.
1332
01:04:46,620 --> 01:04:48,183
It's a fundamental instinct.
1333
01:04:49,110 --> 01:04:51,800
Oh, look, if you feed it and clothe it
1334
01:04:51,800 --> 01:04:54,423
and love it, then it's yours.
1335
01:04:54,423 --> 01:04:56,800
I found this out when I was seven years old.
1336
01:04:56,800 --> 01:04:58,290
Seven?
1337
01:04:58,290 --> 01:05:00,500
I had a dog, and this dog had puppies
1338
01:05:00,500 --> 01:05:02,720
right under my bed.
1339
01:05:02,720 --> 01:05:04,270
And when the puppies died, I went out
1340
01:05:04,270 --> 01:05:07,260
and found a litter of kittens to console it.
1341
01:05:07,260 --> 01:05:10,220
Well, she licked them and she fed them,
1342
01:05:10,220 --> 01:05:13,570
and most important of all, she loved them.
1343
01:05:13,570 --> 01:05:15,343
And believe me, they were hers.
1344
01:05:16,210 --> 01:05:17,700
Well, if Sandy has a litter of kittens,
1345
01:05:17,700 --> 01:05:18,773
I'll love 'em, too.
1346
01:05:19,810 --> 01:05:21,430
But just in case she happens to have a baby,
1347
01:05:21,430 --> 01:05:22,553
it'll be King's.
1348
01:05:23,460 --> 01:05:25,610
The baby is yours.
1349
01:05:25,610 --> 01:05:26,510
Oh, sure.
1350
01:05:28,120 --> 01:05:30,960
There's not a doubt in the world.
1351
01:05:30,960 --> 01:05:33,447
I'd give anything in the world to believe that.
1352
01:05:34,513 --> 01:05:38,830
Uh, I guess it's my turn to tell a story.
1353
01:05:38,830 --> 01:05:40,530
I won't promise to cut out my tongue,
1354
01:05:40,530 --> 01:05:44,580
but I would appreciate it if you'd keep the secret.
1355
01:05:44,580 --> 01:05:45,413
Sure.
1356
01:05:45,413 --> 01:05:48,716
(bold orchestral music)
1357
01:05:56,682 --> 01:05:59,871
(deflated whistling)
1358
01:05:59,871 --> 01:06:01,204
No! King Banner?
1359
01:06:02,800 --> 01:06:04,350
Yeah, it gets you right here, doesn't it?
1360
01:06:04,350 --> 01:06:07,812
All these years and he never let on.
1361
01:06:07,812 --> 01:06:08,830
Oh, he doesn't know.
1362
01:06:08,830 --> 01:06:11,040
Can you imagine anyone telling King
1363
01:06:11,040 --> 01:06:12,893
he's anything less than perfect?
1364
01:06:15,840 --> 01:06:17,564
Do you realize what you're saying?
1365
01:06:17,564 --> 01:06:20,397
(whimsical music)
1366
01:06:28,106 --> 01:06:32,636
Precisely my words to the doctor five years ago.
1367
01:06:32,636 --> 01:06:33,703
Good old King.
1368
01:06:35,440 --> 01:06:37,859
Thanks for telling me. Isn't it wonderful?
1369
01:06:37,859 --> 01:06:40,776
(melancholy music)
1370
01:06:43,779 --> 01:06:44,779
Wonderful.
1371
01:06:47,778 --> 01:06:49,048
Oh, excuse me, my wife's having a baby
1372
01:06:49,048 --> 01:06:51,628
and I'm the father, I'm the father.
1373
01:06:51,628 --> 01:06:52,545
Baby, baby.
1374
01:06:53,788 --> 01:06:55,839
Tulio, he flirted with me.
1375
01:06:55,839 --> 01:06:57,245
(Mrs. Snavely groans)
1376
01:06:57,245 --> 01:07:00,745
(lively orchestral music)
1377
01:07:15,809 --> 01:07:18,220
Excuse me, I'm awfully sorry. Excuse me.
1378
01:07:18,220 --> 01:07:19,870
Captain, she's my wife and the baby,
1379
01:07:19,870 --> 01:07:20,890
I'm, I'm gonna be the father of the baby.
1380
01:07:20,890 --> 01:07:23,927
Oh, excuse me, I'm awfully sorry.
1381
01:07:25,690 --> 01:07:26,620
My wife's baby is gonna look like me.
1382
01:07:26,620 --> 01:07:28,220
My wife's baby, like me!
1383
01:07:28,220 --> 01:07:29,830
Well, that's a risk you have to take.
1384
01:07:29,830 --> 01:07:30,663
Thank you.
1385
01:07:34,950 --> 01:07:39,600
Uh, honey, uh, uh, uh, I'm back.
1386
01:07:39,600 --> 01:07:41,093
Hmm. What happened to you?
1387
01:07:42,040 --> 01:07:44,310
I just realized what a lucky guy I am.
1388
01:07:44,310 --> 01:07:46,530
I've been behaving like an awful rat.
1389
01:07:46,530 --> 01:07:49,750
Where have you been just now, to a revival meeting?
1390
01:07:49,750 --> 01:07:54,284
Sweetheart I, I just, I just wanna watch you knit.
1391
01:07:54,284 --> 01:07:56,980
Mm, sorry, the show just broke.
1392
01:07:56,980 --> 01:07:58,610
Claire and I have hair appointments.
1393
01:07:58,610 --> 01:07:59,860
Then I'll knit for you.
1394
01:08:00,950 --> 01:08:02,723
Think I can't? Watch.
1395
01:08:06,505 --> 01:08:09,196
(Sandy chuckling)
1396
01:08:09,196 --> 01:08:10,700
You nut.
1397
01:08:10,700 --> 01:08:13,380
All right, behave yourself, be a good boy.
1398
01:08:13,380 --> 01:08:15,380
I'll be back in a couple of hours, okay?
1399
01:08:25,660 --> 01:08:28,080
There you are. We've got hair appointments.
1400
01:08:28,080 --> 01:08:30,010
Oh, for goodness sakes, I almost forgot.
1401
01:08:30,010 --> 01:08:31,543
And that I couldn't afford.
1402
01:08:34,476 --> 01:08:36,063
(knocking)
Come in.
1403
01:08:38,470 --> 01:08:39,543
Hi.Hi.
1404
01:08:42,960 --> 01:08:44,080
You're sober.
1405
01:08:44,080 --> 01:08:46,570
Just an affectation. (laughs)
1406
01:08:46,570 --> 01:08:48,500
Sit down, King, you look a little peaked.
1407
01:08:48,500 --> 01:08:50,110
I've never felt better in my life.
1408
01:08:50,110 --> 01:08:52,550
That's right, you're right at the peak of your powers.
1409
01:08:52,550 --> 01:08:53,383
Darn right.
1410
01:08:54,220 --> 01:08:55,233
Right at the peak.
1411
01:08:56,160 --> 01:08:57,940
You should've seen him running all over the ship,
1412
01:08:57,940 --> 01:09:01,790
yelling he was a father, I thought he'd finally flipped.
1413
01:09:01,790 --> 01:09:03,440
Oh, he just went on the wagon.
1414
01:09:03,440 --> 01:09:04,273
Oh.
1415
01:09:05,820 --> 01:09:07,530
Ooh, strawberries and cream.
1416
01:09:07,530 --> 01:09:09,250
I think I'll have some of those.
1417
01:09:09,250 --> 01:09:10,160
Yes, ma'am.
1418
01:09:10,160 --> 01:09:13,880
Make mine a watercress sandwich. I'm counting calories.
1419
01:09:13,880 --> 01:09:16,660
Oh, that sounds good. I'll have that.
1420
01:09:16,660 --> 01:09:18,530
Instead of strawberries?
1421
01:09:18,530 --> 01:09:19,810
No, with the strawberries.
1422
01:09:19,810 --> 01:09:23,430
Oh, strawberries and cream and a watercress sandwich.
1423
01:09:23,430 --> 01:09:26,400
Mm, the clam chowder looks yummy. I'll have that.
1424
01:09:26,400 --> 01:09:27,233
Thank you.
1425
01:09:27,233 --> 01:09:28,103
I'll have that, too.
1426
01:09:29,300 --> 01:09:31,820
Strawberries and cream and a watercress sandwich
1427
01:09:31,820 --> 01:09:33,880
and clam chowder.
That's right.
1428
01:09:33,880 --> 01:09:35,600
The olives are nice.
1429
01:09:35,600 --> 01:09:38,670
Of course, oh and would you bring me a side order
1430
01:09:38,670 --> 01:09:40,423
of those little sour pickles?
1431
01:09:46,160 --> 01:09:46,993
Sour pickles.
1432
01:09:48,050 --> 01:09:52,630
I just all of a sudden crave something a little sour.
1433
01:09:52,630 --> 01:09:53,513
Claire, honey,
1434
01:09:55,810 --> 01:09:58,760
by any chance, would you be feeling upset,
1435
01:09:58,760 --> 01:09:59,863
dizzy or something?
1436
01:10:00,840 --> 01:10:03,763
No, I feel fine, I'm just...
1437
01:10:05,610 --> 01:10:08,188
Oh.
Oh, look out below.
1438
01:10:08,188 --> 01:10:10,771
(horn blowing)
1439
01:10:15,890 --> 01:10:19,390
(lively orchestral music)
1440
01:10:25,530 --> 01:10:30,530
Well, business is picking up. (humming a lullaby)
1441
01:10:35,100 --> 01:10:36,370
Where's King?
1442
01:10:36,370 --> 01:10:37,630
Probably in the gym, why?
1443
01:10:37,630 --> 01:10:38,740
He hasn't heard.
1444
01:10:38,740 --> 01:10:40,976
I want a girl, what do you want?
1445
01:10:40,976 --> 01:10:42,330
I wanna throw up.
1446
01:10:42,330 --> 01:10:44,389
Well, naturally, you have to expect that.
1447
01:10:44,389 --> 01:10:45,461
Why?
1448
01:10:45,461 --> 01:10:47,240
Claire's gonna have a baby.
1449
01:10:47,240 --> 01:10:48,461
It happened just like that.
1450
01:10:48,461 --> 01:10:49,878
Isn't that wonderful?
1451
01:10:49,878 --> 01:10:51,498
Wonderful? It's impossible.
1452
01:10:51,498 --> 01:10:53,650
What in the world are you talking about?
1453
01:10:53,650 --> 01:10:55,350
The doctor said you could have some Bonine
1454
01:10:55,350 --> 01:10:56,370
for your nausea.
1455
01:10:56,370 --> 01:10:57,350
I'll try anything.
1456
01:10:57,350 --> 01:10:59,470
I'll go up to the pharmacy and get you something.
1457
01:10:59,470 --> 01:11:00,870
Bring me back a few.
1458
01:11:01,720 --> 01:11:03,620
Claire, I'm happy as anything about you and King.
1459
01:11:03,620 --> 01:11:06,017
Look, dear heart, I gotta get back to the shop.
1460
01:11:06,017 --> 01:11:08,410
Besides, this may be catching.
1461
01:11:08,410 --> 01:11:10,367
Thanks, Babbette. See you later.
1462
01:11:10,367 --> 01:11:11,750
Okay.
1463
01:11:11,750 --> 01:11:14,360
Claire, I behaved like an ass.
1464
01:11:14,360 --> 01:11:16,140
I deserved your story about King.
1465
01:11:16,140 --> 01:11:17,930
That was no story.
1466
01:11:17,930 --> 01:11:18,763
Please.
1467
01:11:19,610 --> 01:11:22,170
That was no story. I didn't make it up, I swear.
1468
01:11:22,170 --> 01:11:23,655
You didn't?
1469
01:11:23,655 --> 01:11:24,660
And I guess you didn't make up
1470
01:11:24,660 --> 01:11:26,400
that story you told me, either.
1471
01:11:26,400 --> 01:11:27,545
Forget the story I told you.
1472
01:11:27,545 --> 01:11:28,820
It couldn't have happened, couldn't have.
1473
01:11:28,820 --> 01:11:30,260
You can't fight facts.
1474
01:11:30,260 --> 01:11:33,200
There's always the postman's sister-in-law's daughter.
1475
01:11:33,200 --> 01:11:34,230
That's right, there is.
1476
01:11:34,230 --> 01:11:36,780
It could be King's, couldn't it, Jeff?
1477
01:11:36,780 --> 01:11:38,950
Could be, it's got to be, it is.
1478
01:11:38,950 --> 01:11:40,230
And if there's any doubts in your mind,
1479
01:11:40,230 --> 01:11:43,070
just remember the dog and the litter of kittens.
1480
01:11:43,070 --> 01:11:43,963
I remember.
1481
01:11:45,300 --> 01:11:47,550
And Jeff, I want you to be the first to know.
1482
01:11:48,440 --> 01:11:51,260
King's been offered a six-picture deal in Europe,
1483
01:11:51,260 --> 01:11:53,200
and we'll be gone for years.
1484
01:11:53,200 --> 01:11:55,010
When did King decide that?
1485
01:11:55,010 --> 01:11:56,240
Oh, don't be silly.
1486
01:11:56,240 --> 01:11:58,563
He doesn't even know he's going to accept it yet.
1487
01:11:58,563 --> 01:11:59,880
(Jeff laughing)
1488
01:11:59,880 --> 01:12:01,310
Here's big daddy.
1489
01:12:01,310 --> 01:12:04,370
Claire, Claire, Sandy just told me.
1490
01:12:04,370 --> 01:12:05,930
That's a mistake, isn't it?
1491
01:12:05,930 --> 01:12:08,310
No, King. Do you mind?
1492
01:12:08,310 --> 01:12:09,440
Mind?
1493
01:12:09,440 --> 01:12:13,030
For your information, I've been told, not by a quack,
1494
01:12:13,030 --> 01:12:15,210
but by two competent doctors,
1495
01:12:15,210 --> 01:12:16,984
that I could never be a father.
1496
01:12:16,984 --> 01:12:17,817
Jeff?
1497
01:12:17,817 --> 01:12:18,880
(Jeff mutters)
1498
01:12:18,880 --> 01:12:21,350
Oh, no.And now this.
1499
01:12:21,350 --> 01:12:22,910
We'll discuss it later.
1500
01:12:22,910 --> 01:12:24,070
We'll discuss it right now.
1501
01:12:24,070 --> 01:12:25,900
My wife and my best friend.
1502
01:12:25,900 --> 01:12:26,940
Sandy, wait in our cabin.
1503
01:12:26,940 --> 01:12:27,773
No, I wanna hear.
1504
01:12:27,773 --> 01:12:29,400
Stay where you are, Sandy.
1505
01:12:29,400 --> 01:12:30,233
I, I-
1506
01:12:30,233 --> 01:12:32,310
King, I love you, remember that.
1507
01:12:32,310 --> 01:12:34,130
No matter what happens, I love you.
1508
01:12:34,130 --> 01:12:35,050
Remember that, King.
1509
01:12:35,050 --> 01:12:37,550
You two didn't fool me for a minute.
1510
01:12:37,550 --> 01:12:39,250
Now wait a minute, I wish somebody
1511
01:12:39,250 --> 01:12:40,920
would tell me what's going on.
1512
01:12:40,920 --> 01:12:43,300
My wife and my best friend laughing at me.
1513
01:12:43,300 --> 01:12:44,133
I wasn't laughing at you,
1514
01:12:44,133 --> 01:12:45,240
we didn't laugh at you, we'd never laugh-
1515
01:12:45,240 --> 01:12:46,440
Go ahead, laugh at me now.
1516
01:12:46,440 --> 01:12:49,513
Laugh at my pills, my health, with my exercises.
1517
01:12:51,020 --> 01:12:52,521
They worked, didn't they?
1518
01:12:52,521 --> 01:12:53,649
Ho, ho.
1519
01:12:53,649 --> 01:12:55,497
(Jeff and Claire laughing)
1520
01:12:55,497 --> 01:12:56,914
Come here, you.
1521
01:12:57,948 --> 01:13:00,060
Oh, Jeff darling, this has been so much fun.
1522
01:13:00,060 --> 01:13:02,313
Let's do the same thing next year.
1523
01:13:05,580 --> 01:13:09,400
And so two childless couples are no longer childless.
1524
01:13:09,400 --> 01:13:12,080
Two men who thought they would never be fathers
1525
01:13:12,080 --> 01:13:14,620
now find their greatest hopes fulfilled.
1526
01:13:14,620 --> 01:13:19,620
In conclusion, the power of suggestion is a marvelous thing.
1527
01:13:19,980 --> 01:13:22,510
It can work at the most unexpected times.
1528
01:13:24,126 --> 01:13:27,418
Doctor.
1529
01:13:27,418 --> 01:13:31,947
Hi. Can I come in?
1530
01:13:31,947 --> 01:13:34,773
Doctor, I have a problem.
1531
01:13:35,758 --> 01:13:36,837
Wait just a minute.
1532
01:13:38,870 --> 01:13:39,703
To be continued.
1533
01:13:41,160 --> 01:13:41,993
As you were saying.
1534
01:13:41,993 --> 01:13:45,620
Oh, yes, as is was saying, I have a problem, Doctor.
1535
01:13:45,620 --> 01:13:48,200
It's this, you see, my husband and I have been on board
1536
01:13:48,200 --> 01:13:51,300
this ship for six weeks now, and it's been six weeks
1537
01:13:51,300 --> 01:13:53,780
of nothing but sick, sick, sick.
1538
01:13:53,780 --> 01:13:55,923
He hasn't been out of that cabin once,
1539
01:13:55,923 --> 01:13:57,786
well maybe once, and that once he just went over
1540
01:13:57,786 --> 01:14:00,226
and looked overboard, and he got sick again.
1541
01:14:00,226 --> 01:14:02,594
(bold orchestral music)
1542
01:14:02,594 --> 01:14:05,594
(boat horn blowing)
1543
01:14:06,533 --> 01:14:10,033
(lively orchestral music)
117313
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