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We're approaching
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insertion target area,
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about a mile from your D.Z.
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You ready, wd-40?
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I never felt more ready
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in my life.
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Oh, damn! What the hell...
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Steele, are you crazy?
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Good afternoon, wd-40.
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We now begin "the free world's"
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"in double jeopardy" round
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of your mission.
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- He's a sadistic
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criminal mastermind
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and international arms dealer
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who has brokered a deal
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- to sell a stolen
- scorpion missile
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to a middle eastern
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terrorist cell.
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The question is:
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Who is Rancor?
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That's right.
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General Derwood Rancor.
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- So why don't you
- begin your mission.
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And good luck to you, wd-40.
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- And don't forget, wd-40,
- as always,
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this tape will self-destruct
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in three seconds.
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- Steele!
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General Rancor,
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your chopper's waiting.
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Fine. Be there in a minute.
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I ain't done with this one yet.
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- Talk to me, boy!
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He doesn't want to talk.
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Take him outside and shoot him.
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And when you shoot him,
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use the silencer.
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Thank you.
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Have a nice flight.
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Have a great flight.
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- Enjoy destroying
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the world, sir.
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- Thank you, ma'am, I will.
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I'm going in there.
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My God!
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Look at you.
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- You are such
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an incredible man.
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It's my job, darling.
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I do it for my country.
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Hmm? Oh. Good luck.
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Luck's got nothing
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to do with it.
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- Nothing can stop me now!
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Not even that sanctimonious
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secret agent boy scout Dick...
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Yoo-hoo!
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Steele?
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- Oh, Dick, don't drop me!
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- Hold on! Whoa! Don't!
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- Grab my wrist!
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- Oh!
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Whoa!
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- Don't drop me, Dick!
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Don't drop me!
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- Honey?
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♪
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♪ A man of intrigue
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he lives for the thrill ♪
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♪ always has places to go
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and people to kill ♪
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♪ danger is the game
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he plays ♪
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♪ and he holds every card ♪
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♪ 'cause if you wanna win ♪
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♪ you gotta spy hard ♪
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♪ a man of the world
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so suave and discreet ♪
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♪ he trips over the women
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piled up at his feet ♪
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♪ but evil's lurking ♪
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♪ so he's always
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on his guard ♪
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♪ 'cause if you're
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gonna spy ♪
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♪ you better spy hard ♪
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♪ he's always there ♪
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♪ when the chips
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are beginning to fall ♪
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♪ he wouldn't care ♪
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♪ if they kicked him
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and grabbed him ♪
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♪ and shot him
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and stabbed him ♪
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♪ and nailed both his ears
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to the wall ♪
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♪ facing death every day ♪
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♪ is a tough job
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for any man ♪
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♪ but his hours
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are flexible ♪
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♪ and he's got
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a great dental plan ♪
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♪ by the way
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if you walked in late ♪
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♪ allow me to reiterate ♪
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♪ the name of this movie ♪
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♪ is spy hard ♪
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♪ they call it spy hard ♪
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♪ you're watching spy hard ♪
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♪ it's the theme
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from spy hard ♪
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♪
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♪ [ Continues holding
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[ Squawking continues,
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Sir, I hate to disturb you,
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- but we're picking up something
- interesting on the compound
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- infrared detection system. -
- Well, what is it?
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Oh, it's this really neat
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security system, sir.
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It picks up the body heat
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on the intruders...
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Fine! What is it detecting?
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Oh, well, it looks like
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agent Barbara Dahl, sir.
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Barbara Dahl?
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Hot damn!
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At last!
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Arm me.
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Yeah.
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Now, bring me the bait.
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Welcome, miss Dahl.
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General Rancor would
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like to see you.
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Don't even think about it!
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Put the gun down!
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Move. Don't try
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anything funny.
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- Oh, you morons!
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Let go!
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Oh! Oh!
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- Well, look at you.
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Barbara Dahl.
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If you ain't the spitting image
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of your mama.
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Don't you talk about my mother,
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you hybrid curiosity.
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- My mother was twice
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the man you are.
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Hey, lady,
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I think you're carrying
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this "spitting image" thing
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a little bit too far.
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Now that I got Barbara Dahl,
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it's just a matter of time
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before Dick Steele
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comes to get her.
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Have you confirmed
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this transmission?
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I have. It's confirmed.
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It's Barbara Dahl.
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Who authorized
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agent Barbara Dahl to go
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on this operation anyway?
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No one.
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She's working on her own.
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This one is personal,
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Coleman.
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Well, this personal mission may
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have cost a good agent her life,
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- and put the entire free world
- in jeopardy.
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- We must inform the director.
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This is the director.
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What is it, Coleman and bishop?
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Sir, we've intercepted
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a very disturbing
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satellite transmission
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from our listening post
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on the rock of Gibraltar.
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- Well, what is it?
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- It's this really big rock
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sticking out of the water
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on the south coast of Spain.
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What is the transmission?
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You will have to see it
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to believe it, sir.
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- You've got to put it
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on channel three.
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- No, four.
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- Switch it to vhs.
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- And take it off of cable.
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Put it on the monitor.
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And now this special message
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from Rancor industries.
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- She makes a pretty
- hood ornament, don't you think?
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- Rancor!
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- Yes, it is I,
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good ol' general Rancor.
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I'm back, big as life
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and twice as ugly.
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- But Steele blew him up!
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- Apparently not.
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You did everything
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except eat me,
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and I'm still alive.
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All Steele did was blow off
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a couple of arms.
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That's no biggie,
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no big thing.
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Now I got plenty of arms!
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- Big arms. Pretty arms.
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I got arms up the wazoo.
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Now let me show you something.
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Your pretty little agent
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is now part
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of the nose cone
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on top of my missile.
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This missile will be launched
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in 36 hours,
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- and nothing will stop me!
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- He's a madman!
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00:12:07,395 --> 00:12:09,229
Only thing is,
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I'm missing one little chip
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that controls my satellite,
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and, daggone, I want it back!
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Now you hand me my chip,
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and I'll give you back
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your agent.
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Good God.
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He must be stopped!
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Dick Steele couldn't
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stop me 15 years ago,
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and all the Dicks you've got
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won't stop me now!
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Apparently,
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he hasn't seen the size
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of some of our newer members!
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♪
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- With the chip,
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he rules the world.
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♪
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- Without the chip,
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he destroys the world and...
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♪
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- Would you practice someplace
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00:12:39,676 --> 00:12:43,887
else? I'm trying to think!
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♪
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00:12:45,996 --> 00:12:48,100
- The world? Ha!
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00:12:48,101 --> 00:12:49,394
We all know what
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general Rancor really wants.
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- Steele.
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00:12:51,814 --> 00:12:52,938
- That's right!
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00:12:52,939 --> 00:12:54,733
- And we're going
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00:12:54,734 --> 00:12:56,526
to give Steele to him.
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- Steele?
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00:12:56,526 --> 00:12:58,403
- Have you forgotten
- what happened
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00:12:58,406 --> 00:12:59,842
the last time Steele was placed
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in the line of fire?
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♪
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00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:06,244
- ♪
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00:13:06,245 --> 00:13:08,538
- [ Crowd cheering,
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♪
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- ♪
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We are stopping here.
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- Traveller
- wants to mingle with the crowd.
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♪
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Oh! Oh, my God! Steele,
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what the hell are you doing?
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Get off me!
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Get him in there! Get him
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in the limo! Cover him!
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Go, go, go! Go! Go, go!
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The bridge is out.
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Do not enter.
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00:14:08,870 --> 00:14:10,390
The bridge is out.
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00:14:12,457 --> 00:14:14,521
The bridge is out, damn it!
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Stop this car!
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Stay away
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from the window, sir.
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Steele, do something!
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Good job, Steele!
283
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Thanks!
284
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It's about time that jerk
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did something right.
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Hang on, Mr. president!
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The bridge is out.
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00:15:23,506 --> 00:15:28,051
Do not enter.
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00:15:28,052 --> 00:15:30,305
Thank God our president
290
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was one hell of a good swimmer.
291
00:15:32,557 --> 00:15:35,018
Nonetheless...
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There's only one man
293
00:15:32,557 --> 00:15:37,477
for this operation.
294
00:15:37,478 --> 00:15:39,272
Agent wd-40.
295
00:15:39,273 --> 00:15:41,064
Steele.
296
00:15:41,065 --> 00:15:43,233
Dick Steele.
297
00:15:45,425 --> 00:15:47,613
Dick, Dick, Dick Steele.
298
00:15:48,970 --> 00:15:50,323
Dick.
299
00:15:50,324 --> 00:15:54,994
Oh, Dick, that was incredible.
300
00:15:54,995 --> 00:15:56,143
- Thank you.
301
00:15:57,290 --> 00:15:59,708
Don't thank me, darling.
302
00:15:59,709 --> 00:16:01,649
The art of lovemaking
303
00:16:01,650 --> 00:16:03,587
takes two.
304
00:16:03,588 --> 00:16:05,861
Sometimes three or four,
305
00:16:05,862 --> 00:16:08,134
depending on how well
306
00:16:03,588 --> 00:16:08,133
you do at the crap tables.
307
00:16:08,134 --> 00:16:10,094
- Fore!
308
00:16:10,095 --> 00:16:12,053
- Well, my putter's up.
309
00:16:13,619 --> 00:16:15,181
- Oh, Dick, I'm exhausted.
310
00:16:15,182 --> 00:16:17,748
- You are insatiable.
311
00:16:17,749 --> 00:16:20,313
- Fifteen minutes
312
00:16:15,182 --> 00:16:20,312
to tee-off time.
313
00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:22,399
I think there's something
314
00:16:22,400 --> 00:16:24,484
you and I should talk about
315
00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:24,483
openly and honestly
316
00:16:24,484 --> 00:16:25,652
before I head off
317
00:16:25,653 --> 00:16:26,819
to my golf game.
318
00:16:26,820 --> 00:16:28,530
- What is it, Dick?
319
00:16:28,531 --> 00:16:30,238
- It's a game.
320
00:16:30,239 --> 00:16:31,887
People dress funny.
321
00:16:31,888 --> 00:16:33,533
Hit a little ball with clubs.
322
00:16:33,534 --> 00:16:35,744
Drinking is involved.
323
00:16:35,745 --> 00:16:37,830
Is something wrong, Dick?
324
00:16:37,831 --> 00:16:38,978
Whatever we've had
325
00:16:38,979 --> 00:16:40,123
between us,
326
00:16:40,124 --> 00:16:41,709
I think it's only fair
327
00:16:41,710 --> 00:16:43,294
that you know my heart
328
00:16:40,124 --> 00:16:43,293
still belongs
329
00:16:43,294 --> 00:16:44,670
to the girl I fell
330
00:16:44,671 --> 00:16:46,045
in love with years ago.
331
00:16:46,046 --> 00:16:47,361
Victoria.
332
00:16:47,362 --> 00:16:48,674
She fell off a cliff.
333
00:16:48,675 --> 00:16:50,218
- She died.
334
00:16:50,219 --> 00:16:51,760
- Yes, I know.
335
00:16:51,761 --> 00:16:53,887
I was just getting to that.
336
00:16:53,888 --> 00:16:55,473
But after Victoria Dahl,
337
00:16:55,474 --> 00:16:57,056
well, I don't think
338
00:16:57,057 --> 00:16:58,497
I'll ever find room
339
00:16:58,498 --> 00:16:59,935
for another woman in this
340
00:16:59,936 --> 00:17:01,688
ripped-apart, torn-up,
341
00:17:01,689 --> 00:17:03,438
scarred, burned-out
342
00:17:03,439 --> 00:17:06,107
lump in my chest
343
00:17:06,108 --> 00:17:07,589
where a human heart
344
00:17:07,590 --> 00:17:09,068
once beat.
345
00:17:09,069 --> 00:17:10,654
I hope you understand
346
00:17:10,655 --> 00:17:12,238
what I'm trying to say to you.
347
00:17:13,825 --> 00:17:15,408
Oh, I'll live, Mr. Steele.
348
00:17:15,409 --> 00:17:17,432
It's your life
349
00:17:17,433 --> 00:17:19,454
I'm worried about.
350
00:17:19,455 --> 00:17:22,081
I'm glad you understand.
351
00:17:24,315 --> 00:17:26,546
- I know how much
352
00:17:22,082 --> 00:17:26,545
these things can hurt.
353
00:17:26,546 --> 00:17:28,506
Mr. Steele.
354
00:17:29,759 --> 00:17:31,009
Hi, Dick.
355
00:17:35,513 --> 00:17:36,535
- Hi, Mr. Steele!
356
00:17:36,536 --> 00:17:37,557
- Good morning,
357
00:17:35,513 --> 00:17:37,556
Mrs. Hudmucker.
358
00:17:37,557 --> 00:17:39,121
- Fore!
359
00:17:39,122 --> 00:17:40,685
- Watch out.
360
00:17:44,772 --> 00:17:46,023
- You all right?
361
00:17:46,024 --> 00:17:47,273
- Thank you.
362
00:17:48,693 --> 00:17:50,110
A little help, please?
363
00:17:47,274 --> 00:17:50,109
Thank you.
364
00:17:54,283 --> 00:17:56,158
Dinatelli foursome
365
00:17:52,405 --> 00:17:56,157
to starter's window.
366
00:17:56,158 --> 00:17:57,450
Mr. Jack Dinatelli.
367
00:17:57,451 --> 00:17:59,620
Duck!
368
00:18:07,129 --> 00:18:08,587
- Dick, wait!
369
00:18:10,841 --> 00:18:13,091
- Well, Steve!
370
00:18:13,092 --> 00:18:14,928
- Steve bishop.
- You look great.
371
00:18:14,931 --> 00:18:17,055
- Thank you.
- We go back a long way, huh?
372
00:18:17,058 --> 00:18:18,931
Yeah.
373
00:18:20,850 --> 00:18:21,893
- Let's have a drink.
374
00:18:21,894 --> 00:18:22,935
- Okay.
375
00:18:22,936 --> 00:18:24,853
Just sit right there, Steve.
376
00:18:24,854 --> 00:18:26,356
- The usual, Mr. Steele?
377
00:18:26,357 --> 00:18:27,856
- You betcha.
378
00:18:27,857 --> 00:18:29,108
- Well, how's everything
379
00:18:29,109 --> 00:18:30,359
at the agency?
380
00:18:27,857 --> 00:18:30,358
- Ah, Dick...
381
00:18:30,359 --> 00:18:32,132
It used to be such fun
382
00:18:32,133 --> 00:18:33,904
killin' a few spies
383
00:18:33,905 --> 00:18:35,177
with gas
384
00:18:35,178 --> 00:18:36,448
from a banana grenade.
385
00:18:36,449 --> 00:18:38,118
But now, huh, it's all
386
00:18:38,119 --> 00:18:39,785
bureaucratic politics.
387
00:18:39,786 --> 00:18:41,329
You gotta fill out 20 forms
388
00:18:41,330 --> 00:18:42,871
in triplicate
389
00:18:42,872 --> 00:18:44,998
just to take a piss!
390
00:18:47,418 --> 00:18:48,586
[ Grunts,
391
00:18:55,051 --> 00:18:56,991
[ Both grunting, groaning,
392
00:18:58,930 --> 00:19:00,223
[ Coins jingling on floor,
393
00:19:02,810 --> 00:19:04,101
- Boy, that was fun.
394
00:19:04,102 --> 00:19:05,728
- Yeah.
395
00:19:05,729 --> 00:19:07,353
- Thank you!
396
00:19:07,354 --> 00:19:08,606
Oh, man, they don't
397
00:19:08,607 --> 00:19:09,857
do stuff like that
398
00:19:07,354 --> 00:19:09,856
at the agency anymore.
399
00:19:09,857 --> 00:19:10,963
I'm sorry to hear that,
400
00:19:10,964 --> 00:19:12,067
Steve.
401
00:19:12,068 --> 00:19:13,403
- Uh, Dickie...
402
00:19:13,404 --> 00:19:14,737
There is something.
403
00:19:12,068 --> 00:19:14,736
- Relax, sugar.
404
00:19:14,737 --> 00:19:15,884
Steve,
405
00:19:15,885 --> 00:19:17,030
I'm out of the service.
406
00:19:17,031 --> 00:19:18,408
There's a plot
407
00:19:18,409 --> 00:19:19,783
to launch a satellite.
408
00:19:19,784 --> 00:19:21,932
- Now, I'm out of the service.
409
00:19:21,933 --> 00:19:24,080
Talk about something else.
410
00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:25,394
- Bishop.
411
00:19:25,395 --> 00:19:26,706
- Bishop here.
412
00:19:26,707 --> 00:19:28,417
- Got a new lead. - Gonna need you here.
- Uh-huh. Yeah.
413
00:19:28,420 --> 00:19:29,669
And get a dozen eggs
414
00:19:29,670 --> 00:19:30,919
and a gallon of milk.
415
00:19:30,920 --> 00:19:31,921
- I'll leave right away.
416
00:19:31,922 --> 00:19:32,922
- Thank you, sir.
417
00:19:32,923 --> 00:19:34,799
No more headsets.
418
00:19:34,802 --> 00:19:35,884
Ear buttons.
419
00:19:35,885 --> 00:19:36,968
They put the receiver
420
00:19:34,799 --> 00:19:36,967
right in your head now.
421
00:19:38,430 --> 00:19:39,658
I gotta get back
422
00:19:39,659 --> 00:19:40,887
to the hotel.
423
00:19:40,888 --> 00:19:42,306
- The director wants
424
00:19:42,307 --> 00:19:43,724
you to see this.
425
00:19:40,888 --> 00:19:43,723
- I'm not interested, Steve.
426
00:19:43,724 --> 00:19:45,059
Please, Dickie.
427
00:19:45,060 --> 00:19:46,392
Take a look at the tape.
428
00:19:46,393 --> 00:19:48,688
It'll change your mind.
429
00:19:52,566 --> 00:19:56,569
♪
430
00:19:56,570 --> 00:20:00,573
♪
431
00:20:00,574 --> 00:20:04,243
♪
432
00:20:04,244 --> 00:20:06,706
Hmm-hmm.
433
00:20:11,210 --> 00:20:14,796
♪
434
00:20:14,797 --> 00:20:18,717
♪
435
00:20:18,718 --> 00:20:20,011
She makes a pretty hood
436
00:20:20,012 --> 00:20:21,302
ornament, don't you think?
437
00:20:21,303 --> 00:20:24,015
Yes, it is I,
438
00:20:24,016 --> 00:20:26,725
good ol' general Rancor.
439
00:20:26,726 --> 00:20:27,998
I'm back, big as life
440
00:20:27,999 --> 00:20:29,268
and twice as ugly.
441
00:20:34,525 --> 00:20:35,943
- All Steele did was blow off
442
00:20:35,944 --> 00:20:37,361
a couple of arms.
443
00:20:34,525 --> 00:20:37,360
- Rancor!
444
00:20:37,361 --> 00:20:38,634
That's no biggie, no big thing.
445
00:20:38,635 --> 00:20:39,905
Now I got plenty of arms.
446
00:20:39,906 --> 00:20:41,656
He can't be alive.
447
00:20:41,657 --> 00:20:43,347
- Your pretty Barbara Dahl...
448
00:20:43,348 --> 00:20:45,035
- My God!
449
00:20:45,036 --> 00:20:47,453
Barbara Dahl.
450
00:20:50,457 --> 00:20:52,542
Victoria.
451
00:20:52,543 --> 00:20:53,711
Why would your daughter
452
00:20:53,712 --> 00:20:54,878
join the agency,
453
00:20:54,879 --> 00:20:57,047
knowing what happened to you?
454
00:20:57,048 --> 00:20:59,258
Why?
455
00:21:00,342 --> 00:21:02,468
Why?
456
00:21:02,469 --> 00:21:05,013
Why, why, why, why?
457
00:21:05,014 --> 00:21:07,892
Victoria Dahl...
458
00:21:07,893 --> 00:21:10,770
You were the only woman
459
00:21:05,014 --> 00:21:10,769
I ever loved.
460
00:21:10,770 --> 00:21:12,939
♪ Raindrops keep fallin'
461
00:21:12,940 --> 00:21:15,107
on my head ♪
462
00:21:15,108 --> 00:21:17,923
♪ and just like the guy
463
00:21:17,924 --> 00:21:20,738
whose feet are too big
464
00:21:15,108 --> 00:21:20,737
for his bed ♪
465
00:21:20,738 --> 00:21:22,177
- ♪ nothin' seems to fit ♪
466
00:21:23,616 --> 00:21:26,411
♪ Those raindrops
467
00:21:26,412 --> 00:21:29,205
are fallin' on my head
468
00:21:23,616 --> 00:21:29,204
they keep fallin' ♪
469
00:21:29,205 --> 00:21:32,083
♪ so I just did me
470
00:21:32,084 --> 00:21:34,960
some talkin' to the sun ♪
471
00:21:34,961 --> 00:21:37,922
♪ and I said I didn't like
472
00:21:37,923 --> 00:21:40,882
the way he got things done ♪
473
00:21:40,883 --> 00:21:43,718
♪ sleepin' on the job ♪
474
00:21:43,719 --> 00:21:45,679
- ♪ those raindrops are fallin'
- on my head ♪
475
00:21:47,723 --> 00:21:50,226
♪ They keep fallin'
476
00:21:50,227 --> 00:21:52,727
but there's one thing ♪
477
00:21:52,728 --> 00:21:54,854
♪ I know ♪
478
00:21:54,855 --> 00:21:56,878
♪ the blues they sent
479
00:21:56,879 --> 00:21:58,900
to meet me ♪
480
00:21:58,901 --> 00:22:01,820
♪ won't defeat me ♪
481
00:22:01,821 --> 00:22:03,927
♪ it won't be long
482
00:22:03,928 --> 00:22:06,032
'til happiness ♪
483
00:22:06,033 --> 00:22:08,494
♪ steps up to greet me ♪
484
00:22:13,166 --> 00:22:14,313
[ Victoria screaming,
485
00:22:15,459 --> 00:22:16,523
♪ Raindrops keep fallin'
486
00:22:16,524 --> 00:22:17,585
on my head ♪
487
00:22:17,586 --> 00:22:19,609
♪ but that doesn't mean my eyes
488
00:22:19,610 --> 00:22:21,631
will soon be turnin' red ♪
489
00:22:23,448 --> 00:22:25,261
For today's top story, we now
490
00:22:21,632 --> 00:22:25,260
join Kelly Lange live downtown.
491
00:22:25,261 --> 00:22:26,658
Kelly Lange here
492
00:22:26,659 --> 00:22:28,054
for channel 3 island news.
493
00:22:28,055 --> 00:22:30,328
A tragic accident has claimed
494
00:22:30,329 --> 00:22:32,601
the life of a businessman
495
00:22:28,055 --> 00:22:32,600
identified as Steven bishop,
496
00:22:32,601 --> 00:22:35,208
when a huge grand piano
497
00:22:35,209 --> 00:22:37,815
fell from the 17th floor
498
00:22:32,601 --> 00:22:37,814
of the Mayan hotel
499
00:22:37,815 --> 00:22:39,067
directly behind me
500
00:22:39,068 --> 00:22:40,317
and landed on his car.
501
00:22:40,318 --> 00:22:41,444
- An accident?
502
00:22:41,445 --> 00:22:42,568
- It seems the man was...
503
00:22:42,569 --> 00:22:43,612
- Having a kid at 60,
504
00:22:43,613 --> 00:22:44,655
that's an accident.
505
00:22:44,655 --> 00:22:46,407
Having a piano fall on you,
506
00:22:46,408 --> 00:22:48,158
that's... bad luck.
507
00:22:48,159 --> 00:22:50,161
We're told that they
508
00:22:50,162 --> 00:22:52,163
had to remove the driver's body
509
00:22:48,159 --> 00:22:52,162
from the oil pan of the car.
510
00:22:52,163 --> 00:22:53,477
Police are ruling this
511
00:22:53,478 --> 00:22:54,789
as an accident.
512
00:22:54,790 --> 00:22:55,958
Operator.
513
00:22:55,959 --> 00:22:57,125
Operator, get me Washington.
514
00:22:57,126 --> 00:22:58,336
- George?
515
00:22:58,337 --> 00:22:59,545
- D.C.
516
00:23:06,553 --> 00:23:08,304
I'll take care of the luggage,
517
00:23:04,800 --> 00:23:08,304
just some overnight things.
518
00:23:17,146 --> 00:23:18,731
The white zone...
519
00:23:18,734 --> 00:23:20,003
[ Brakes screeching,
520
00:23:21,275 --> 00:23:22,798
- Bonjour, monsieur.
521
00:23:22,799 --> 00:23:24,319
- ...no parking.
522
00:23:24,320 --> 00:23:26,030
Do not leave
523
00:23:26,031 --> 00:23:27,739
your baggage unattended.
524
00:23:27,740 --> 00:23:29,346
It looks like
525
00:23:29,347 --> 00:23:30,951
you could use a hand.
526
00:23:33,954 --> 00:23:37,957
I'm afraid I'm pretty clumsy.
527
00:23:37,958 --> 00:23:39,898
- You must be headed
528
00:23:39,899 --> 00:23:41,837
to Los Angeles.
529
00:23:37,958 --> 00:23:41,836
- How do you know that?
530
00:23:41,837 --> 00:23:44,298
- It's written
531
00:23:44,299 --> 00:23:46,759
on your ticket.
532
00:23:41,837 --> 00:23:46,758
- Oh! Thank you.
533
00:23:46,759 --> 00:23:48,927
You are welcome.
534
00:23:48,928 --> 00:23:50,138
Have a nice flight,
535
00:23:50,139 --> 00:23:51,346
and I wish you adieu.
536
00:23:51,347 --> 00:23:53,411
Oh, thank you,
537
00:23:53,412 --> 00:23:55,475
but I'm quite satisfied
538
00:23:51,347 --> 00:23:55,475
with the 'do I have.
539
00:24:02,816 --> 00:24:04,506
If you want to see me again,
540
00:24:04,507 --> 00:24:06,195
turn around now.
541
00:24:15,996 --> 00:24:18,582
Aha.
542
00:24:29,595 --> 00:24:30,760
It's right here on the aisle.
543
00:24:32,764 --> 00:24:34,765
No, no, no.
544
00:24:30,761 --> 00:24:34,764
I asked for a window seat.
545
00:24:34,765 --> 00:24:36,580
I can't be getting up and down
546
00:24:36,581 --> 00:24:38,394
just because somebody wants
547
00:24:34,765 --> 00:24:38,393
to be getting in and out.
548
00:24:38,394 --> 00:24:39,812
I have too much to do.
549
00:24:39,813 --> 00:24:41,229
I always have a window seat.
550
00:24:41,230 --> 00:24:42,440
Excuse me, sir.
551
00:24:42,441 --> 00:24:43,648
I was wondering, do you mind?
552
00:24:43,649 --> 00:24:45,297
No problem.
553
00:24:45,298 --> 00:24:46,943
Please, be my guest.
554
00:24:46,944 --> 00:24:48,112
Actually,
555
00:24:48,113 --> 00:24:49,279
I prefer an aisle seat.
556
00:24:49,280 --> 00:24:51,156
Be my guest.
557
00:24:51,157 --> 00:24:52,262
Here, let me help you
558
00:24:52,263 --> 00:24:53,366
with these.
559
00:24:53,367 --> 00:24:54,765
I hope that this will be
560
00:24:54,766 --> 00:24:56,161
the last of the conversations
561
00:24:56,162 --> 00:24:58,121
on this trip.
562
00:24:58,122 --> 00:25:00,082
Your ticket.
563
00:25:05,587 --> 00:25:06,630
[ Cat yowling,
564
00:25:07,673 --> 00:25:09,549
- Take it easy
- with that luggage!
565
00:25:09,552 --> 00:25:10,738
[ Shattering,
566
00:25:11,927 --> 00:25:13,700
Excuse me, sir. Could you
567
00:25:13,701 --> 00:25:15,473
put your tray table up
568
00:25:11,927 --> 00:25:15,472
for takeoff, please?
569
00:25:15,473 --> 00:25:17,558
No, the tray table
570
00:25:17,559 --> 00:25:19,643
stays down, please.
571
00:25:15,473 --> 00:25:19,642
Thank you very much.
572
00:25:19,643 --> 00:25:21,207
You've made things
573
00:25:21,208 --> 00:25:22,770
inconvenient enough as it is.
574
00:25:22,771 --> 00:25:24,065
- What... what is this?
575
00:25:25,358 --> 00:25:27,318
- Is this yours?
- Do you mind?
576
00:25:27,321 --> 00:25:28,674
It's my briefcase.
577
00:25:28,675 --> 00:25:30,028
Let me make more room for you.
578
00:25:37,203 --> 00:25:39,247
Excuse me.
579
00:25:39,248 --> 00:25:41,289
Is this seat taken?
580
00:25:41,290 --> 00:25:43,249
Please.
581
00:25:43,250 --> 00:25:45,378
Thank you.
582
00:25:48,797 --> 00:25:51,092
Do you always take matters
583
00:25:51,093 --> 00:25:53,385
into your own hands?
584
00:25:53,386 --> 00:25:55,075
Things often end up
585
00:25:55,076 --> 00:25:56,762
in my hands.
586
00:25:56,763 --> 00:25:58,265
And I bet your hands
587
00:25:58,266 --> 00:25:59,765
end up in a lot of things.
588
00:25:59,766 --> 00:26:00,767
Let's just say,
589
00:26:00,768 --> 00:26:01,768
my hands and things
590
00:26:01,769 --> 00:26:03,083
are often in the same place
591
00:26:03,084 --> 00:26:04,397
at the same time.
592
00:26:05,689 --> 00:26:06,690
Could I get you
593
00:26:06,691 --> 00:26:07,691
something to drink?
594
00:26:07,692 --> 00:26:10,173
We'll have dry
595
00:26:10,174 --> 00:26:12,654
Minoli and Russos,
596
00:26:07,691 --> 00:26:12,653
on the rocks,
597
00:26:12,654 --> 00:26:14,614
- stirred, not beaten,
- twist of lemon,
598
00:26:14,617 --> 00:26:15,824
in chilled glasses,
599
00:26:15,825 --> 00:26:17,033
not frozen.
600
00:26:17,034 --> 00:26:18,494
And two of those
601
00:26:18,495 --> 00:26:19,953
curly little straws.
602
00:26:56,763 --> 00:26:58,075
Thirty hours, 11 minutes
603
00:26:55,448 --> 00:26:58,074
and 10 seconds.
604
00:26:58,075 --> 00:26:59,472
Thirty hours, 11 minutes
605
00:26:59,473 --> 00:27:00,868
and 8 seconds.
606
00:27:00,869 --> 00:27:02,016
Thirty hours, 11 minutes
607
00:27:02,017 --> 00:27:03,162
and 5 seconds.
608
00:27:09,338 --> 00:27:11,130
Miss Cheevus, when agent Steele
609
00:27:07,543 --> 00:27:11,129
arrives, send him right in.
610
00:27:11,130 --> 00:27:13,215
Mm-hmm.
611
00:27:20,264 --> 00:27:21,745
Miss Cheevus,
612
00:27:21,746 --> 00:27:23,224
is the director available?
613
00:27:23,225 --> 00:27:24,683
No, he's married.
614
00:27:24,684 --> 00:27:26,624
- Oh, you kidder.
615
00:27:28,564 --> 00:27:31,233
Miss Cheevus,
616
00:27:31,234 --> 00:27:33,902
you wouldn't be trying
617
00:27:28,564 --> 00:27:33,901
to make things hard for me?
618
00:27:33,902 --> 00:27:35,550
Oh, Dick,
619
00:27:35,551 --> 00:27:37,196
if only I could.
620
00:27:37,197 --> 00:27:39,428
But you know you and I
621
00:27:39,429 --> 00:27:41,659
would work so well together
622
00:27:37,197 --> 00:27:41,658
deep undercover.
623
00:27:41,659 --> 00:27:43,141
You know the agency's
624
00:27:43,142 --> 00:27:44,621
rules about secrecy.
625
00:27:44,622 --> 00:27:47,039
They're very... rigid.
626
00:27:47,040 --> 00:27:49,189
- Yes, and we wouldn't want
627
00:27:49,190 --> 00:27:51,337
to blow it, would we?
628
00:27:52,485 --> 00:27:53,631
Why don't you two just
629
00:27:51,337 --> 00:27:53,630
get a motel room?
630
00:27:53,631 --> 00:27:54,820
I need you
631
00:27:54,821 --> 00:27:56,008
in here now, Steele!
632
00:28:26,788 --> 00:28:29,187
Miss Cheevus,
633
00:28:29,188 --> 00:28:31,585
wasn't the director
634
00:28:26,788 --> 00:28:31,584
in the office here?
635
00:28:31,585 --> 00:28:33,546
He just buzzed me from in
636
00:28:33,547 --> 00:28:35,505
there, my little pumpy-whumpy.
637
00:28:35,506 --> 00:28:36,736
I'll just sit down
638
00:28:36,737 --> 00:28:37,966
and wait for him.
639
00:28:56,985 --> 00:28:58,987
Great Scott!
640
00:28:58,988 --> 00:29:00,988
Steele, see a doctor!
641
00:29:02,930 --> 00:29:04,867
- Good show, Steele.
642
00:29:04,868 --> 00:29:06,975
I hid for two weeks
643
00:29:06,976 --> 00:29:09,081
from my ex-wife's attorney
644
00:29:04,868 --> 00:29:09,080
in this outfit.
645
00:29:09,081 --> 00:29:11,832
It's good to see you, wd-40.
646
00:29:11,833 --> 00:29:13,627
- You were always
- my most noble warrior.
647
00:29:13,630 --> 00:29:14,837
- Glad to find you, sir.
648
00:29:14,838 --> 00:29:16,045
- Yes, yes, well,
649
00:29:16,046 --> 00:29:17,485
we have to find someone else
650
00:29:17,486 --> 00:29:18,923
far more important now.
651
00:29:18,924 --> 00:29:20,760
- You saw the tape with Rancor?
652
00:29:20,761 --> 00:29:22,594
- I can't believe he's alive.
653
00:29:22,595 --> 00:29:23,888
He's a madman.
654
00:29:23,889 --> 00:29:25,179
He wants the world.
655
00:29:25,180 --> 00:29:26,994
But I'll be
656
00:29:26,995 --> 00:29:28,808
perfectly frank, Dick.
657
00:29:25,180 --> 00:29:28,807
He wants you first.
658
00:29:28,808 --> 00:29:30,810
He knew I'd send you
659
00:29:30,811 --> 00:29:32,812
the tape, especially
660
00:29:28,808 --> 00:29:32,812
with Barbara Dahl on it.
661
00:29:35,525 --> 00:29:36,733
Barbara Dahl.
662
00:29:36,734 --> 00:29:38,194
Looks just like Victoria
663
00:29:38,195 --> 00:29:39,652
when she was alive.
664
00:29:39,653 --> 00:29:40,675
We don't have time
665
00:29:40,676 --> 00:29:41,696
for flashbacks.
666
00:29:41,697 --> 00:29:43,595
Rancor wants the world.
667
00:29:43,596 --> 00:29:45,492
Fortunately, he wants
668
00:29:41,697 --> 00:29:45,491
to kill you first.
669
00:29:45,492 --> 00:29:47,202
- That may give us
- needed time.
670
00:29:47,205 --> 00:29:49,663
- Barbara Dahl's last transmission
- was from Los Angeles.
671
00:29:49,666 --> 00:29:51,019
We couldn't hold the trace
672
00:29:51,020 --> 00:29:52,373
long enough to pinpoint her.
673
00:29:52,374 --> 00:29:54,772
Find her, you find him,
674
00:29:54,773 --> 00:29:57,169
you find the rocket.
675
00:29:57,170 --> 00:29:58,505
For the rest of it,
676
00:29:58,506 --> 00:29:59,838
your guess is as good as mine.
677
00:29:59,839 --> 00:30:01,841
- Miss Cheevus,
678
00:30:01,842 --> 00:30:03,843
tell noggin we're coming.
679
00:30:03,843 --> 00:30:04,928
- Hello, noggin.
680
00:30:04,929 --> 00:30:06,011
- Steele.
681
00:30:06,012 --> 00:30:07,846
It's good to see you again.
682
00:30:07,847 --> 00:30:09,767
- Oh, do you have a refill of
- that deathray laser watch?
683
00:30:09,770 --> 00:30:11,477
- Ah, a new air freshener?
684
00:30:11,478 --> 00:30:13,185
- Careful!
685
00:30:13,186 --> 00:30:14,313
♪ Whoo-hoo
686
00:30:14,314 --> 00:30:15,438
oooh ♪
687
00:30:15,439 --> 00:30:16,899
- Not again. Oh!
688
00:30:18,358 --> 00:30:20,943
Give me!
689
00:30:20,944 --> 00:30:22,091
Well, this looks like
690
00:30:22,092 --> 00:30:23,237
a clever contraption.
691
00:30:23,238 --> 00:30:24,823
A mini...
692
00:30:24,824 --> 00:30:26,407
A mini mobile crime lab?
693
00:30:26,408 --> 00:30:27,659
- It's a briefcase.
694
00:30:27,660 --> 00:30:28,909
- I know. What does it do?
695
00:30:28,910 --> 00:30:30,808
It holds important papers,
696
00:30:30,809 --> 00:30:32,705
files, pens and a calculator.
697
00:30:32,706 --> 00:30:34,041
I understand, but these
698
00:30:34,042 --> 00:30:35,375
numbers here, are they
699
00:30:32,706 --> 00:30:35,374
in a certain sequence?
700
00:30:35,375 --> 00:30:36,502
The briefcase
701
00:30:36,503 --> 00:30:37,627
is timed to explode?
702
00:30:37,628 --> 00:30:39,568
No, it's a lock
703
00:30:39,569 --> 00:30:41,507
so people other than myself
704
00:30:37,628 --> 00:30:41,506
can't open my briefcase.
705
00:30:41,507 --> 00:30:43,196
Very complex
706
00:30:43,197 --> 00:30:44,883
contemporary technology.
707
00:30:44,884 --> 00:30:46,845
- All right, Steele, this is
- your standard, state-of-the-art
708
00:30:46,848 --> 00:30:48,055
g-7 field kit with
709
00:30:48,056 --> 00:30:49,263
three additions.
710
00:30:49,264 --> 00:30:51,454
This is our latest development:
711
00:30:51,455 --> 00:30:53,643
Microchip z-ray lenses,
712
00:30:53,644 --> 00:30:54,687
capable of penetrating
713
00:30:54,688 --> 00:30:55,728
a layer of clothing.
714
00:30:55,729 --> 00:30:57,085
You'll be able to see if
715
00:30:57,086 --> 00:30:58,439
an enemy is carrying a weapon.
716
00:30:58,440 --> 00:31:00,149
Oh. Director?
717
00:31:00,150 --> 00:31:02,486
Oh, now, Steele... should you
718
00:31:02,487 --> 00:31:04,821
find your hands bound,
719
00:31:04,822 --> 00:31:06,803
what you can do is just
720
00:31:06,804 --> 00:31:08,783
reach down and pull this pin
721
00:31:08,784 --> 00:31:10,619
with your teeth.
722
00:31:12,996 --> 00:31:14,977
Put the tube in your mouth,
723
00:31:14,978 --> 00:31:16,957
and squeeze and it will emit
724
00:31:16,958 --> 00:31:18,481
a laser beam powerful enough
725
00:31:18,482 --> 00:31:20,002
to cut steel.
726
00:31:20,003 --> 00:31:21,046
Fire in the hole,
727
00:31:21,047 --> 00:31:22,087
director.
728
00:31:22,088 --> 00:31:23,590
- Huh? Oh.
729
00:31:23,591 --> 00:31:25,091
- Thank you.
730
00:31:29,346 --> 00:31:31,347
Oh, and one more thing.
731
00:31:31,348 --> 00:31:32,391
This micro-detonator
732
00:31:32,392 --> 00:31:33,432
has a built-in timer
733
00:31:33,433 --> 00:31:34,705
set to explode 30 seconds
734
00:31:34,706 --> 00:31:35,976
after you plant it.
735
00:31:35,977 --> 00:31:37,417
It has enough power
736
00:31:37,418 --> 00:31:38,855
to blow up a two-story building,
737
00:31:38,856 --> 00:31:39,878
- so be careful.
738
00:31:39,879 --> 00:31:40,898
- Fantastic.
739
00:31:40,899 --> 00:31:42,818
- All right. Well,
- here we go and, uh...
740
00:31:42,821 --> 00:31:44,549
- Oh, the glasses.
741
00:31:44,550 --> 00:31:46,278
- Yeah. Thank you.
742
00:31:46,279 --> 00:31:47,468
Good to see you again,
743
00:31:47,469 --> 00:31:48,657
noggin.
744
00:32:00,920 --> 00:32:02,127
Bienvenidos a Los Angeles.
745
00:32:03,360 --> 00:32:04,589
Welcome to Los Angeles.
746
00:32:04,590 --> 00:32:06,758
Ciudad de Los Angeles.
747
00:32:06,759 --> 00:32:08,926
City of the angels.
748
00:32:08,927 --> 00:32:11,178
¿Donde esta Maria?
749
00:32:11,179 --> 00:32:13,055
Where is Maria?
750
00:32:13,056 --> 00:32:14,475
Maria esta
751
00:32:14,476 --> 00:32:15,892
en la biblioteca.
752
00:32:15,893 --> 00:32:16,915
Maria is
753
00:32:16,916 --> 00:32:17,935
in the library.
754
00:32:17,936 --> 00:32:19,646
- Do you have a lighter?
755
00:32:19,647 --> 00:32:21,355
- I use matches.
756
00:32:21,356 --> 00:32:22,712
Does your mother
757
00:32:22,713 --> 00:32:24,066
know you smoke?
758
00:32:24,067 --> 00:32:27,069
Yes, but I don't inhale.
759
00:32:27,070 --> 00:32:28,906
- Kabul.
760
00:32:28,907 --> 00:32:30,740
- Uh...
761
00:32:30,741 --> 00:32:32,243
I'm Kabul.
762
00:32:32,244 --> 00:32:33,743
Agent wd-40?
763
00:32:34,850 --> 00:32:35,953
- Get in, get in.
764
00:32:35,954 --> 00:32:38,080
In the car.
765
00:32:42,963 --> 00:32:44,462
Hello. Excuse me. Ha!
766
00:32:44,463 --> 00:32:46,090
Our operatives believe
767
00:32:46,091 --> 00:32:47,716
you may already be
768
00:32:44,463 --> 00:32:47,715
in grave danger.
769
00:32:47,716 --> 00:32:49,823
Please take a look at this,
770
00:32:49,824 --> 00:32:51,928
Mr. Steele.
771
00:32:51,929 --> 00:32:53,847
- In that file is a photo
- of Desiree more.
772
00:32:53,850 --> 00:32:54,994
She's an expert trained
773
00:32:54,995 --> 00:32:56,140
in karate, kung fu,
774
00:32:56,141 --> 00:32:57,413
and is a crack shot.
775
00:32:57,414 --> 00:32:58,684
Be on your guard.
776
00:32:58,685 --> 00:33:00,083
Rancor may have sent her
777
00:33:00,084 --> 00:33:01,479
to take you out.
778
00:33:01,480 --> 00:33:02,982
She likes easy-listening
779
00:33:02,983 --> 00:33:04,483
and guys who share
780
00:33:01,480 --> 00:33:04,482
their feelings.
781
00:33:04,483 --> 00:33:07,006
Her measurements:
782
00:33:07,007 --> 00:33:09,529
36-24-36-22.
783
00:33:10,948 --> 00:33:12,595
Aye, and for God sakes,
784
00:33:12,596 --> 00:33:14,241
be careful, wd-40.
785
00:33:14,242 --> 00:33:16,203
One time I got two cousins
786
00:33:16,204 --> 00:33:18,163
that got salmonella poisoning
787
00:33:14,242 --> 00:33:18,163
in this hotel.
788
00:33:40,457 --> 00:33:42,186
Ah, sure looked like her.
789
00:33:42,187 --> 00:33:45,606
But you can't be too sure.
790
00:33:45,607 --> 00:33:48,484
Yeah, almost positive.
791
00:33:48,485 --> 00:33:50,570
Mm-hmm.
792
00:33:51,697 --> 00:33:53,656
Drink?
793
00:33:53,657 --> 00:33:55,075
- Only when I'm thirsty.
794
00:33:55,076 --> 00:33:56,492
- Tap water okay?
795
00:33:56,493 --> 00:33:59,036
Poured, not decanted.
796
00:33:59,037 --> 00:34:00,831
Sometimes you see a woman
797
00:34:00,834 --> 00:34:01,978
you'd just love
798
00:34:01,979 --> 00:34:03,123
to have kill ya.
799
00:34:03,124 --> 00:34:05,002
But timing is everything,
800
00:34:05,003 --> 00:34:06,879
so that was not going
801
00:34:03,124 --> 00:34:06,878
to be today.
802
00:34:06,879 --> 00:34:09,087
Says who?
803
00:34:10,570 --> 00:34:12,050
She's pretty smart.
804
00:34:09,088 --> 00:34:12,049
I decided to play it casual.
805
00:34:12,050 --> 00:34:13,844
Casual is overrated.
806
00:34:18,264 --> 00:34:20,183
Oops.
807
00:34:28,817 --> 00:34:29,839
I think the game is over,
808
00:34:29,840 --> 00:34:30,860
Mr. Steele.
809
00:34:30,861 --> 00:34:32,342
You're gonna look like
810
00:34:32,343 --> 00:34:33,821
Swiss cheese when they find you.
811
00:34:33,822 --> 00:34:35,261
Oh.
812
00:34:35,262 --> 00:34:36,700
That's no Gouda.
813
00:34:49,838 --> 00:34:51,986
[ Knocking,
814
00:35:12,069 --> 00:35:15,030
"Coca cabana."
815
00:35:20,243 --> 00:35:21,849
- I'll be back for you.
816
00:35:21,850 --> 00:35:23,454
- Where are you going?
817
00:35:23,455 --> 00:35:24,665
In my country,
818
00:35:24,666 --> 00:35:25,873
we have a saying:
819
00:35:25,874 --> 00:35:26,980
"A man who rides a camel"
820
00:35:26,981 --> 00:35:28,084
is rich,
821
00:35:28,085 --> 00:35:29,753
- but a man who drives
822
00:35:29,754 --> 00:35:31,421
"a Ferrari can get lucky."
823
00:35:31,421 --> 00:35:32,735
[ Tires squealing,
824
00:35:34,049 --> 00:35:36,342
Oh, gee, I am so sorry.
825
00:35:36,345 --> 00:35:38,282
- What's your phone number?
826
00:35:38,283 --> 00:35:40,220
- Loser.
827
00:35:40,221 --> 00:35:41,285
- Oh, thank you.
828
00:35:42,348 --> 00:35:43,725
Oh, like, look
829
00:35:43,726 --> 00:35:45,101
at what you've done.
830
00:35:45,102 --> 00:35:47,895
End of the line, pal.
831
00:35:47,896 --> 00:35:49,773
Uh...
832
00:36:04,913 --> 00:36:07,623
Hey, goombah!
833
00:36:07,624 --> 00:36:08,917
- Huh?
834
00:36:15,715 --> 00:36:17,238
Well, well,
835
00:36:17,239 --> 00:36:18,760
if it isn't agent Steele.
836
00:36:19,845 --> 00:36:21,847
Excuse me.
837
00:36:21,848 --> 00:36:23,849
Uh, do you have a light?
838
00:36:26,225 --> 00:36:27,977
Yeah, sure.
839
00:36:27,978 --> 00:36:29,729
I got a light.
840
00:36:32,816 --> 00:36:36,110
Ow. Ow. Ow.
841
00:36:45,745 --> 00:36:47,830
Very good.
842
00:36:47,831 --> 00:36:49,124
Well, remind me never
843
00:36:49,125 --> 00:36:50,415
to light your cigarette.
844
00:36:50,416 --> 00:36:51,605
You don't lose guys
845
00:36:51,606 --> 00:36:52,793
like that for long.
846
00:36:52,794 --> 00:36:53,941
Let's get the bus.
847
00:36:53,942 --> 00:36:55,088
We'll be safe there.
848
00:36:57,423 --> 00:36:59,029
- Transfer?
849
00:36:57,423 --> 00:37:00,634
Uh, no, thank you.
850
00:37:03,262 --> 00:37:05,161
- Mmm, nice dress.
851
00:37:13,065 --> 00:37:15,524
Sunset boulevard.
852
00:37:15,525 --> 00:37:18,028
I guess it's sunset boulevard.
853
00:37:26,995 --> 00:37:29,580
Pop quiz, hotshot.
854
00:37:29,581 --> 00:37:30,666
Someone on the bus
855
00:37:30,667 --> 00:37:31,749
without a transfer.
856
00:37:31,750 --> 00:37:33,792
He won't pay the fare.
857
00:37:33,793 --> 00:37:34,982
What do you do?
858
00:37:34,983 --> 00:37:36,170
What do you do?
859
00:37:36,171 --> 00:37:38,131
- Stop the bus
- and let him off?
860
00:37:38,134 --> 00:37:40,592
Negatory, honcho,
861
00:37:40,593 --> 00:37:43,053
because he cut the brake line.
862
00:37:56,942 --> 00:37:59,819
Excusez-moi, monsieur.
863
00:39:08,180 --> 00:39:09,888
- That was nice. Nicely done.
864
00:39:09,889 --> 00:39:11,974
Thank you. Thank you.
865
00:39:13,686 --> 00:39:15,394
Melrose.
866
00:39:11,975 --> 00:39:15,393
I think.
867
00:39:15,394 --> 00:39:17,105
Well, you must be "fameeshed."
868
00:39:17,106 --> 00:39:18,814
Let's mangez.
869
00:39:18,815 --> 00:39:20,171
That sounds good,
870
00:39:20,172 --> 00:39:21,525
but I'm hungry.
871
00:39:21,526 --> 00:39:23,653
Let's eat first.
872
00:39:26,364 --> 00:39:28,033
♪
873
00:39:28,034 --> 00:39:29,701
- Here you go.
874
00:39:26,364 --> 00:39:29,700
You both enjoy yourselves.
875
00:39:29,701 --> 00:39:31,578
Brian will be right here
876
00:39:31,579 --> 00:39:33,453
to take your drink order.
877
00:39:33,454 --> 00:39:35,144
We shared an airplane,
878
00:39:35,145 --> 00:39:36,832
a drink.
879
00:39:36,833 --> 00:39:38,418
We've been chased,
880
00:39:38,419 --> 00:39:40,002
bussed, seated, but...
881
00:39:40,003 --> 00:39:41,651
I still don't
882
00:39:41,652 --> 00:39:43,297
really know you.
883
00:39:43,298 --> 00:39:45,238
I'm Bud Fudlacker. I have
884
00:39:45,239 --> 00:39:47,176
a small mail-order business.
885
00:39:47,177 --> 00:39:48,449
I travel with
886
00:39:48,450 --> 00:39:49,720
the American gladiators,
887
00:39:49,721 --> 00:39:51,056
I'm 55,
888
00:39:51,057 --> 00:39:52,389
I like small appliances,
889
00:39:52,390 --> 00:39:54,351
- and I do tax accounting
- on the side.
890
00:39:54,354 --> 00:39:56,040
Let me guess.
891
00:39:56,041 --> 00:39:57,728
You are Dick Steele,
892
00:39:57,729 --> 00:39:59,544
agent wd-40
893
00:39:59,545 --> 00:40:01,357
with the secret service.
894
00:40:01,358 --> 00:40:03,339
You are 52,
895
00:40:03,340 --> 00:40:05,319
you like big screen TVs,
896
00:40:05,320 --> 00:40:06,550
and you want to stop
897
00:40:06,551 --> 00:40:07,779
general Rancor.
898
00:40:07,780 --> 00:40:09,303
That could describe
899
00:40:09,304 --> 00:40:10,824
a thousand guys.
900
00:40:10,825 --> 00:40:12,743
Tell me about you.
901
00:40:12,744 --> 00:40:14,788
I like loose-fitting clothes,
902
00:40:14,789 --> 00:40:16,830
and I drive a '69 pinto.
903
00:40:16,831 --> 00:40:18,729
Hi, I'm Brian. May I take
904
00:40:18,730 --> 00:40:20,625
your drink orders, please?
905
00:40:20,626 --> 00:40:22,420
- I'll have...
906
00:40:22,421 --> 00:40:24,214
- A dry Minoli and Russo
907
00:40:20,626 --> 00:40:24,213
on the rocks.
908
00:40:24,214 --> 00:40:26,798
Stirred, not beaten.
909
00:40:26,799 --> 00:40:28,781
With a twist.
910
00:40:28,782 --> 00:40:30,762
In a chilled glass,
911
00:40:26,799 --> 00:40:30,761
not frozen.
912
00:40:30,762 --> 00:40:32,618
With two of those
913
00:40:32,619 --> 00:40:34,472
curly little straws.
914
00:40:34,473 --> 00:40:36,434
Be right back.
915
00:40:38,061 --> 00:40:40,896
Tell me, who are you?
916
00:40:40,897 --> 00:40:42,711
Why don't you
917
00:40:42,712 --> 00:40:44,524
use your...
918
00:40:44,525 --> 00:40:46,131
Legendary skills,
919
00:40:46,132 --> 00:40:47,736
and guess?
920
00:40:47,737 --> 00:40:49,990
You carry a UB-21 schnauzer
921
00:40:49,991 --> 00:40:52,242
with a Gnab silencer.
922
00:40:47,737 --> 00:40:52,241
That's K.G.B.
923
00:40:52,242 --> 00:40:54,015
You prefer an H&K over an A.K.
924
00:40:54,016 --> 00:40:55,787
Your surveillance technique
925
00:40:52,242 --> 00:40:55,786
is N.S.A.
926
00:40:55,787 --> 00:40:57,372
Your I.D. Is C.I.A.
927
00:40:57,373 --> 00:40:58,956
You received your ph.D. At NYU.
928
00:40:58,957 --> 00:41:00,750
- Traded in your G.T.O.
- For a B.M.W.
929
00:41:00,753 --> 00:41:02,335
You listen to cds
930
00:41:02,336 --> 00:41:03,919
by R.E.M. And S.T.P.
931
00:41:03,920 --> 00:41:05,130
And you'd like
932
00:41:05,131 --> 00:41:06,338
to see J.F.K. In his B.V.D.S,
933
00:41:06,339 --> 00:41:08,006
getting down with O.P.P.
934
00:41:08,007 --> 00:41:09,363
And you probably put the
935
00:41:09,364 --> 00:41:10,717
toilet paper back on the roll
936
00:41:10,718 --> 00:41:11,719
with the paper
937
00:41:11,720 --> 00:41:12,720
on the inside.
938
00:41:12,721 --> 00:41:14,638
Hmm.
939
00:41:14,639 --> 00:41:16,620
Here's to your remarkable
940
00:41:16,621 --> 00:41:18,601
powers of observation,
941
00:41:14,639 --> 00:41:18,600
Mr. Steele.
942
00:41:18,601 --> 00:41:21,083
I am agent 3.14,
943
00:41:21,084 --> 00:41:23,563
Veronique Ukrinsky.
944
00:41:23,564 --> 00:41:24,586
My father
945
00:41:24,587 --> 00:41:25,607
is the professor.
946
00:41:25,608 --> 00:41:27,610
Oh, yes, I know.
947
00:41:27,611 --> 00:41:29,611
The megachip.
948
00:41:29,612 --> 00:41:31,510
When he found out he was
949
00:41:31,511 --> 00:41:33,408
making the chip for Rancor,
950
00:41:29,612 --> 00:41:33,407
and not for the U.S.,
951
00:41:33,408 --> 00:41:34,680
he escaped with it,
952
00:41:34,681 --> 00:41:35,951
and he is in hiding.
953
00:41:35,952 --> 00:41:37,828
In hiding? Where?
954
00:41:37,829 --> 00:41:39,018
He would not take the chance
955
00:41:39,019 --> 00:41:40,206
in telling me where
956
00:41:37,829 --> 00:41:40,205
he was headed,
957
00:41:40,206 --> 00:41:42,125
but he said,
958
00:41:42,126 --> 00:41:44,042
"the pendant..."
959
00:41:44,043 --> 00:41:46,150
Follow the path of your pendant
960
00:41:46,151 --> 00:41:48,256
"to find me."
961
00:41:49,674 --> 00:41:52,093
Hmm... haven't seen
962
00:41:52,094 --> 00:41:54,511
too many like these.
963
00:41:54,512 --> 00:41:56,473
- Pendant.
- Pendant.
964
00:41:56,476 --> 00:41:58,183
- Pendant.
- Pendant.
965
00:41:58,186 --> 00:42:00,018
- Pendant.
966
00:42:00,019 --> 00:42:01,853
- We don't have
967
00:41:58,183 --> 00:42:01,852
much time, wd-40.
968
00:42:01,853 --> 00:42:03,271
Sooner or later,
969
00:42:03,272 --> 00:42:04,688
Rancor will find him.
970
00:42:04,689 --> 00:42:06,648
I'll order our food to go.
971
00:42:06,649 --> 00:42:07,734
Oh, Dick, I am so worried
972
00:42:07,735 --> 00:42:08,817
about my father.
973
00:42:08,818 --> 00:42:10,591
What shall we do, huh?
974
00:42:10,592 --> 00:42:12,363
What shall we do?
975
00:42:12,364 --> 00:42:14,698
♪
976
00:42:14,699 --> 00:42:16,805
♪ It was a teenage wedding
977
00:42:16,806 --> 00:42:18,911
and the old folks
978
00:42:14,699 --> 00:42:18,911
wished them well ♪
979
00:42:20,913 --> 00:42:22,853
♪ you could see that Pierre
980
00:42:22,854 --> 00:42:24,792
did truly love
981
00:42:20,913 --> 00:42:24,792
the mademoiselle ♪
982
00:42:26,919 --> 00:42:29,026
♪ and now the young monsieur
983
00:42:29,027 --> 00:42:31,132
and madam have rung
984
00:42:26,919 --> 00:42:31,132
the chapel bell ♪
985
00:42:32,675 --> 00:42:33,718
♪ "c'est la vie"
986
00:42:33,719 --> 00:42:34,759
said the old folks ♪
987
00:42:34,760 --> 00:42:36,137
♪ it goes to show
988
00:42:36,138 --> 00:42:37,514
you never can tell ♪
989
00:42:41,476 --> 00:42:45,396
♪
990
00:42:47,023 --> 00:42:48,983
Excuse me. - Do you have reser...
991
00:42:50,736 --> 00:42:52,486
- Steele's here somewhere.
992
00:42:52,487 --> 00:42:54,385
Rancor wants him dead.
993
00:42:54,386 --> 00:42:56,281
Find him.
994
00:42:57,827 --> 00:42:59,368
♪
995
00:42:59,369 --> 00:43:01,579
- Dance time is over.
- Cigarettes? Cigars?
996
00:43:01,582 --> 00:43:02,684
- There he goes. Kill him!
997
00:43:02,685 --> 00:43:03,788
- Throwing knife?
998
00:43:03,789 --> 00:43:05,312
Cigarettes? Cigars?
999
00:43:05,313 --> 00:43:06,833
Throwing knife?
1000
00:43:06,834 --> 00:43:08,668
Thanks.
1001
00:43:08,669 --> 00:43:09,942
Cigarettes?
1002
00:43:09,943 --> 00:43:11,213
Cigars?
1003
00:43:13,301 --> 00:43:15,384
- Oops.
1004
00:43:15,385 --> 00:43:17,512
Why?
1005
00:43:23,351 --> 00:43:24,832
Quick. Get this
1006
00:43:24,833 --> 00:43:26,312
up against the door.
1007
00:43:34,028 --> 00:43:36,154
I got an idea.
1008
00:43:36,155 --> 00:43:37,344
This is a picture
1009
00:43:37,345 --> 00:43:38,532
of my father.
1010
00:43:38,533 --> 00:43:40,285
If we get separated,
1011
00:43:40,286 --> 00:43:42,035
find him, save him.
1012
00:43:44,205 --> 00:43:46,623
Why?
1013
00:43:46,624 --> 00:43:48,793
- Go! Go, go, go!
1014
00:43:50,962 --> 00:43:52,777
- Oh, shut up!
1015
00:43:52,778 --> 00:43:54,590
- Ow! I came here to dance!
1016
00:43:54,591 --> 00:43:56,197
- Ow!
1017
00:43:54,591 --> 00:43:57,801
Dick, help me!
1018
00:43:57,802 --> 00:44:00,011
I'll kill you!
1019
00:44:00,012 --> 00:44:01,410
- Get in this...
1020
00:44:01,411 --> 00:44:02,806
- No, let me go!
1021
00:44:04,767 --> 00:44:07,291
[ Groaning,
1022
00:44:16,404 --> 00:44:18,886
- Okay, let's go!
1023
00:44:18,887 --> 00:44:21,367
- Dick, help me!
1024
00:44:29,313 --> 00:44:30,918
"Follow the path of your
1025
00:44:27,706 --> 00:44:30,917
pendant to find me."
1026
00:44:30,918 --> 00:44:32,670
- What is that?
1027
00:44:32,671 --> 00:44:34,421
- It's her pendant.
1028
00:44:34,422 --> 00:44:36,508
- "Follow the path
- of the pendant to find me."
1029
00:44:36,511 --> 00:44:37,738
Have you ever seen
1030
00:44:37,739 --> 00:44:38,967
anything like that?
1031
00:44:38,968 --> 00:44:41,054
- Ah!
1032
00:44:41,055 --> 00:44:43,138
- What? What?
1033
00:44:43,139 --> 00:44:45,432
No.
1034
00:44:45,433 --> 00:44:46,830
Any idea
1035
00:44:46,831 --> 00:44:48,226
where it came from?
1036
00:44:48,227 --> 00:44:50,000
- Museum of natural history.
1037
00:44:50,001 --> 00:44:51,771
- How do you know that?
1038
00:44:51,772 --> 00:44:53,462
It says it really small
1039
00:44:53,463 --> 00:44:55,150
right there at the bottom.
1040
00:44:55,151 --> 00:44:56,694
All right.
1041
00:44:56,695 --> 00:44:58,237
Take me to the museum
1042
00:44:55,151 --> 00:44:58,236
of natural history.
1043
00:44:58,237 --> 00:44:59,572
You know, in my country
1044
00:44:59,573 --> 00:45:00,905
we do have a saying...
1045
00:45:00,906 --> 00:45:02,658
I'm sure you do.
1046
00:45:02,659 --> 00:45:04,035
"The museum"
1047
00:45:04,036 --> 00:45:05,410
is closed at 5:00.
1048
00:45:05,411 --> 00:45:06,600
You go
1049
00:45:06,601 --> 00:45:07,788
"the next morning at 9:00."
1050
00:45:11,397 --> 00:45:12,876
- Excuse me, Mr. pushy!
1051
00:45:12,877 --> 00:45:14,752
Son of a bitch.
1052
00:45:16,716 --> 00:45:18,486
I'm getting sick and tired
1053
00:45:18,487 --> 00:45:20,259
of your...
1054
00:45:31,145 --> 00:45:33,439
Mm-hmm.
1055
00:45:37,193 --> 00:45:38,424
No, he'd never
1056
00:45:38,425 --> 00:45:39,653
fit in there.
1057
00:45:39,654 --> 00:45:41,656
- Ah. Sir...
1058
00:45:45,660 --> 00:45:46,765
I'm sick and tired
1059
00:45:46,766 --> 00:45:47,870
of these games.
1060
00:45:52,584 --> 00:45:55,460
This is stupid. Stupid.
1061
00:45:55,461 --> 00:45:56,567
We're a government agency,
1062
00:45:56,568 --> 00:45:57,672
for God sakes.
1063
00:46:00,799 --> 00:46:03,052
Huh?
1064
00:46:05,054 --> 00:46:06,097
- Aha!
1065
00:46:11,603 --> 00:46:13,187
Good God! You're sicker
1066
00:46:13,188 --> 00:46:14,771
than I thought!
1067
00:46:15,856 --> 00:46:17,150
What is it, Coleman?
1068
00:46:17,151 --> 00:46:18,442
I'm busy!
1069
00:46:18,443 --> 00:46:20,153
- I, uh, can see that.
1070
00:46:20,154 --> 00:46:21,861
- You wouldn't understand.
1071
00:46:21,862 --> 00:46:23,114
It's the ancient art
1072
00:46:23,115 --> 00:46:24,364
of origatsi.
1073
00:46:24,365 --> 00:46:26,430
What I don't understand is
1074
00:46:26,431 --> 00:46:28,494
your insistence in keeping
1075
00:46:24,365 --> 00:46:28,493
Steele on this assignment!
1076
00:46:28,494 --> 00:46:29,662
He still is
1077
00:46:29,663 --> 00:46:30,828
no closer to Rancor,
1078
00:46:30,829 --> 00:46:32,352
and we have who knows
1079
00:46:32,353 --> 00:46:33,874
how little time left before
1080
00:46:30,829 --> 00:46:33,873
Rancor launches this satellite.
1081
00:46:33,874 --> 00:46:36,231
You better let me take over
1082
00:46:36,232 --> 00:46:38,587
this search before I...
1083
00:46:38,588 --> 00:46:40,464
Before you what, Coleman?
1084
00:46:40,465 --> 00:46:41,632
I don't know whose monkey
1085
00:46:41,633 --> 00:46:42,798
you spanked to get this job,
1086
00:46:42,799 --> 00:46:44,301
but as far as I'm concerned,
1087
00:46:44,302 --> 00:46:45,802
you're a disgrace
1088
00:46:42,799 --> 00:46:45,801
to the service.
1089
00:46:45,802 --> 00:46:47,679
How dare you!
1090
00:46:47,680 --> 00:46:48,973
You and your
1091
00:46:48,974 --> 00:46:50,266
one-for-all-and-all-for-one
1092
00:46:47,680 --> 00:46:50,265
bleeding heart nonsense!
1093
00:46:50,266 --> 00:46:51,768
You're too old
1094
00:46:51,769 --> 00:46:53,268
to run this agency!
1095
00:46:53,269 --> 00:46:54,625
And since
1096
00:46:54,626 --> 00:46:55,979
you won't step down,
1097
00:46:55,980 --> 00:46:58,983
you'll, uh, be stepped on!
1098
00:47:02,780 --> 00:47:04,613
- Ha! Loser!
1099
00:47:04,614 --> 00:47:06,490
What you got?
1100
00:47:06,491 --> 00:47:07,826
Is there a jewelry district
1101
00:47:07,827 --> 00:47:09,159
in Los Angeles?
1102
00:47:09,160 --> 00:47:11,078
- Come on, this is Hollywood.
- We have jewelry.
1103
00:47:11,081 --> 00:47:12,163
We have women
1104
00:47:12,164 --> 00:47:13,246
who are willing to sleep...
1105
00:47:13,247 --> 00:47:15,208
- More important, is there
1106
00:47:15,209 --> 00:47:17,168
a Russian jewelry section?
1107
00:47:13,247 --> 00:47:17,167
- Da.
1108
00:47:17,168 --> 00:47:18,440
- Where?
1109
00:47:18,441 --> 00:47:19,711
- I don't know.
1110
00:47:19,712 --> 00:47:21,881
There used to be a bunch
1111
00:47:21,882 --> 00:47:24,049
of Russian jewelers hung out
1112
00:47:19,712 --> 00:47:24,049
at the warehouse at, uh...
1113
00:47:25,134 --> 00:47:27,260
At 31st and phlegm.
1114
00:47:29,014 --> 00:47:30,764
- Ah, damn it!
1115
00:47:30,765 --> 00:47:32,767
- Meet me back at the hotel.
- We'll split up.
1116
00:47:32,770 --> 00:47:33,956
- After you.
1117
00:47:33,957 --> 00:47:35,143
- Thank you.
1118
00:47:36,146 --> 00:47:37,146
Excuse me.
1119
00:47:38,482 --> 00:47:39,815
- Get off!
1120
00:47:55,872 --> 00:47:58,875
Whoa! Whoa! Wh-whoa!
1121
00:48:06,801 --> 00:48:08,219
[ People in foyer yelling,
1122
00:48:12,097 --> 00:48:14,058
Watch it! Watch it!
1123
00:48:27,238 --> 00:48:29,114
Whoa.
1124
00:48:33,725 --> 00:48:34,829
- Cheerio.
1125
00:48:52,764 --> 00:48:53,828
[ Horse snorts,
1126
00:49:02,398 --> 00:49:03,712
You're mine,
1127
00:49:03,713 --> 00:49:05,025
Steele!
1128
00:49:13,076 --> 00:49:14,117
- Whoa!
1129
00:49:14,118 --> 00:49:15,495
[ Continues screaming,
1130
00:49:16,871 --> 00:49:18,289
- Whoa!
1131
00:49:18,290 --> 00:49:19,706
- Whoa!
1132
00:49:27,320 --> 00:49:29,634
- Huh?
1133
00:49:50,028 --> 00:49:52,281
Okay, bring it up!
1134
00:49:52,282 --> 00:49:54,532
Bring it up! Up, up, up!
1135
00:49:54,533 --> 00:49:56,264
Okay, that's where
1136
00:49:56,265 --> 00:49:57,994
the sign goes!
1137
00:50:00,687 --> 00:50:01,790
Ah, 31st and phlegm.
1138
00:50:01,791 --> 00:50:02,834
I'm on the waiting list
1139
00:50:02,835 --> 00:50:03,875
for a co-op.
1140
00:50:10,090 --> 00:50:11,530
You better get outta here.
1141
00:50:11,531 --> 00:50:12,969
I'll see you back
1142
00:50:10,090 --> 00:50:12,968
in half an hour.
1143
00:50:12,969 --> 00:50:14,074
Oh, half hour?
1144
00:50:14,075 --> 00:50:15,179
I can drop off my dog
1145
00:50:12,969 --> 00:50:15,179
at the groomer.
1146
00:50:17,306 --> 00:50:18,412
[ Car backfires,
1147
00:50:44,750 --> 00:50:47,274
- Wha...
1148
00:50:47,275 --> 00:50:49,796
- Mr. Steele, I presume?
1149
00:50:49,797 --> 00:50:52,091
- Professor...
1150
00:50:52,092 --> 00:50:54,385
- Ukrinsky.
1151
00:50:49,797 --> 00:50:54,385
With a "y."
1152
00:51:04,102 --> 00:51:07,982
Ah. Right.
1153
00:51:09,984 --> 00:51:12,694
The pendant.
1154
00:51:12,695 --> 00:51:15,112
And I suppose...
1155
00:51:15,113 --> 00:51:16,991
- This is
- what you need.
1156
00:51:16,994 --> 00:51:18,742
And this is?
1157
00:51:18,743 --> 00:51:20,536
This is the controller chip
1158
00:51:20,537 --> 00:51:22,328
for Rancor's satellite.
1159
00:51:22,329 --> 00:51:23,560
Ah, Rancor finally
1160
00:51:23,561 --> 00:51:24,789
made his megachip.
1161
00:51:24,790 --> 00:51:26,918
- Who'd have thought the fate
- of so many human lives
1162
00:51:26,921 --> 00:51:28,044
would rely
1163
00:51:28,045 --> 00:51:29,168
on something so small?
1164
00:51:29,169 --> 00:51:30,838
Well, there's only one thing
1165
00:51:30,839 --> 00:51:32,506
to do with this.
1166
00:51:37,638 --> 00:51:39,930
- No! No! What are you doing?
1167
00:51:39,931 --> 00:51:41,266
Trying to make the world
1168
00:51:41,267 --> 00:51:42,599
safe from tyranny.
1169
00:51:42,600 --> 00:51:43,975
You mustn't do that!
1170
00:51:43,976 --> 00:51:45,311
This can also be used
1171
00:51:45,312 --> 00:51:46,644
for world peace!
1172
00:51:46,645 --> 00:51:48,980
Oh, I'm sorry.
1173
00:51:48,981 --> 00:51:50,963
You'd better let me get that
1174
00:51:50,964 --> 00:51:52,944
into the proper hands
1175
00:51:48,981 --> 00:51:52,944
and get you to safety.
1176
00:51:54,779 --> 00:51:56,530
- You found me through
- my daughter, the pendant.
1177
00:51:56,533 --> 00:51:57,969
- Right.
1178
00:51:57,970 --> 00:51:59,407
- Veronique is safe?
1179
00:51:59,408 --> 00:52:00,805
Yeah, the Van they
1180
00:52:00,806 --> 00:52:02,202
took her in has dual
1181
00:51:59,408 --> 00:52:02,201
air bags and seat belts.
1182
00:52:04,914 --> 00:52:06,249
- Kabul.
1183
00:52:06,250 --> 00:52:07,582
- Nice new wheels, huh?
1184
00:52:07,583 --> 00:52:09,397
Yeah, quite an improvement.
1185
00:52:09,398 --> 00:52:11,210
In the back, professor.
1186
00:52:11,211 --> 00:52:12,692
We have to find a safe place
1187
00:52:12,693 --> 00:52:14,171
for the professor.
1188
00:52:14,172 --> 00:52:15,194
In my country,
1189
00:52:15,195 --> 00:52:16,215
we have saying:
1190
00:52:16,216 --> 00:52:18,010
"The rabbit hops,"
1191
00:52:18,011 --> 00:52:19,804
the spider crawls,
1192
00:52:16,216 --> 00:52:19,803
"but the camel spits."
1193
00:52:19,804 --> 00:52:20,805
Let's see
1194
00:52:20,806 --> 00:52:21,806
if this charger can run.
1195
00:52:21,807 --> 00:52:23,203
[ Starts engine,
1196
00:52:27,311 --> 00:52:28,333
Now I don't want you
1197
00:52:28,334 --> 00:52:29,353
to be surprised.
1198
00:52:29,354 --> 00:52:31,544
This guy's one of our top
1199
00:52:31,545 --> 00:52:33,734
agents; He's most capable.
1200
00:52:38,864 --> 00:52:39,886
- McCluckey!
1201
00:52:39,887 --> 00:52:40,907
- Kabul!
1202
00:52:45,746 --> 00:52:47,248
- Come on in.
1203
00:52:47,249 --> 00:52:48,748
- All right. Come on.
1204
00:52:48,749 --> 00:52:50,167
McCluckey, we need
1205
00:52:50,168 --> 00:52:51,584
to hide the professor.
1206
00:52:51,585 --> 00:52:53,149
- Professor Ukrinsky,
1207
00:52:53,150 --> 00:52:54,713
it's an honor.
1208
00:52:51,585 --> 00:52:54,712
- How do you do?
1209
00:52:54,713 --> 00:52:56,444
I've read all your work
1210
00:52:56,445 --> 00:52:58,174
and your last paper on
1211
00:52:54,713 --> 00:52:58,173
laboratory loneliness.
1212
00:52:58,174 --> 00:52:59,656
- Superb!
1213
00:52:59,657 --> 00:53:01,136
- Well, thank you.
1214
00:53:01,137 --> 00:53:02,493
- McCluckey, I'd like you
1215
00:53:02,494 --> 00:53:03,848
to meet agent...
1216
00:53:01,137 --> 00:53:03,847
- Dick Steele.
1217
00:53:03,848 --> 00:53:05,725
Agent wd-40. Good to see you
1218
00:53:05,726 --> 00:53:07,600
back in action.
1219
00:53:07,601 --> 00:53:10,166
Your video on deception,
1220
00:53:10,167 --> 00:53:12,731
is it a woman?
1221
00:53:07,601 --> 00:53:12,730
Is the moustache real?
1222
00:53:12,731 --> 00:53:14,565
Beautiful work!
1223
00:53:14,566 --> 00:53:16,401
- Thank you.
1224
00:53:16,402 --> 00:53:18,236
- McCluckey, we need
1225
00:53:14,566 --> 00:53:18,235
to hide this guy.
1226
00:53:18,236 --> 00:53:19,947
Sure, sure. Come this way.
1227
00:53:19,948 --> 00:53:21,657
He'll be safe here.
1228
00:53:22,783 --> 00:53:24,742
Do you have a telephone?
1229
00:53:24,743 --> 00:53:26,744
Right over there.
1230
00:53:26,745 --> 00:53:28,580
- Is it clean?
1231
00:53:28,581 --> 00:53:30,415
- I have a woman that
1232
00:53:26,745 --> 00:53:30,415
comes in once a week.
1233
00:53:34,545 --> 00:53:35,900
- Sir?
1234
00:53:35,901 --> 00:53:37,254
- What?
1235
00:53:37,255 --> 00:53:38,736
I have Dick "luscious lips"
1236
00:53:38,737 --> 00:53:40,215
Steele on the line.
1237
00:53:40,216 --> 00:53:41,802
Put him through.
1238
00:53:43,512 --> 00:53:45,430
Director, is it safe?
1239
00:53:45,433 --> 00:53:47,683
Safe? Just a minute.
1240
00:53:47,684 --> 00:53:49,935
I'll use the cloaking device.
1241
00:54:00,320 --> 00:54:01,551
Go ahead, Dick.
1242
00:54:01,552 --> 00:54:02,780
It's safe.
1243
00:54:02,781 --> 00:54:04,637
I have the chip Rancor needs
1244
00:54:04,638 --> 00:54:06,492
to launch his satellite.
1245
00:54:08,580 --> 00:54:10,664
Good, Dick, good.
1246
00:54:06,493 --> 00:54:10,663
Are you coming in?
1247
00:54:11,938 --> 00:54:13,209
No, Rancor kidnapped
1248
00:54:10,664 --> 00:54:13,208
the professor's daughter.
1249
00:54:13,209 --> 00:54:15,334
I've got to find her.
1250
00:54:15,335 --> 00:54:16,775
- Yes,
1251
00:54:16,776 --> 00:54:18,214
well... good, Dick.
1252
00:54:18,214 --> 00:54:20,048
Good luck.
1253
00:54:20,049 --> 00:54:22,843
Call me if I can help.
1254
00:54:32,249 --> 00:54:33,686
Nineteen hours and 35 minutes.
1255
00:54:33,687 --> 00:54:35,293
That Steele's gonna be sorry
1256
00:54:35,294 --> 00:54:36,898
his mama ever met his papa.
1257
00:54:39,152 --> 00:54:41,403
- We gonna heat up
1258
00:54:36,899 --> 00:54:41,402
the fire! Boys!
1259
00:54:41,403 --> 00:54:43,321
- They always seem to know
- every move we make.
1260
00:54:43,324 --> 00:54:45,365
- It's inside. It's got to be
- somebody inside leaking.
1261
00:54:45,368 --> 00:54:46,763
Well, I'm not leaking.
1262
00:54:46,764 --> 00:54:48,159
I can prove it.
1263
00:54:48,160 --> 00:54:49,537
- You go ahead,
1264
00:54:49,538 --> 00:54:50,913
ask me something.
1265
00:54:48,160 --> 00:54:50,912
- What?
1266
00:54:50,913 --> 00:54:53,082
- Ask me something. Ask me who's
- the director of our agency.
1267
00:54:53,085 --> 00:54:54,855
- Who is the director
1268
00:54:54,856 --> 00:54:56,627
of our agency?
1269
00:54:53,082 --> 00:54:56,626
- I don't know.
1270
00:54:56,627 --> 00:54:57,816
You see, I know
1271
00:54:57,817 --> 00:54:59,003
who it is, you see?
1272
00:54:59,004 --> 00:55:00,881
But I'm not going
1273
00:55:00,882 --> 00:55:02,758
to tell you, you see,
1274
00:54:59,004 --> 00:55:02,757
because I am no leak.
1275
00:55:04,052 --> 00:55:05,343
This place has got to be
1276
00:55:02,758 --> 00:55:05,342
a front for Rancor and his men.
1277
00:55:05,343 --> 00:55:08,013
- There's one of them now.
1278
00:55:08,014 --> 00:55:10,682
Follow him.
1279
00:55:11,893 --> 00:55:13,102
Do you have to keep
1280
00:55:10,682 --> 00:55:13,101
revving the engine?
1281
00:55:15,334 --> 00:55:17,564
Ah, but it's an American V-8.
1282
00:55:13,102 --> 00:55:17,563
It's such a beautiful sound.
1283
00:55:17,564 --> 00:55:19,858
Oh, Steele, listen to this.
1284
00:55:19,861 --> 00:55:21,693
- My cousin's
1285
00:55:21,694 --> 00:55:23,528
a recording star.
1286
00:55:19,858 --> 00:55:23,527
♪
1287
00:55:23,528 --> 00:55:24,884
- Duck!
1288
00:55:24,885 --> 00:55:26,239
- Ow!
1289
00:55:26,240 --> 00:55:31,244
♪
1290
00:55:31,245 --> 00:55:37,625
♪
1291
00:55:37,626 --> 00:55:39,065
- Did he see us?
1292
00:55:39,066 --> 00:55:40,503
- Shh.
1293
00:55:48,720 --> 00:55:49,826
- I'm going in there.
1294
00:55:49,827 --> 00:55:50,930
- Okay.
1295
00:55:50,931 --> 00:55:52,266
- Give me cover.
1296
00:55:52,267 --> 00:55:53,600
- I got to buy
1297
00:55:50,931 --> 00:55:53,600
my lottery ticket.
1298
00:55:59,940 --> 00:56:01,379
- Rancor's guy is here.
1299
00:56:01,380 --> 00:56:02,817
- Right.
1300
00:56:02,818 --> 00:56:05,863
♪ That saved a wretch
1301
00:56:05,864 --> 00:56:08,906
like me ♪
1302
00:56:08,907 --> 00:56:13,828
♪ I once was lost ♪
1303
00:56:13,829 --> 00:56:18,875
♪ but now am found ♪
1304
00:56:18,876 --> 00:56:20,836
♪ was blind... ♪
1305
00:56:24,715 --> 00:56:26,654
- What are you doing here?
1306
00:56:26,655 --> 00:56:28,592
- I am... the new choirmaster.
1307
00:56:28,593 --> 00:56:29,928
- Where did you come from?
1308
00:56:29,929 --> 00:56:31,262
- The humble room.
1309
00:56:31,263 --> 00:56:32,847
I was doing refractories.
1310
00:56:32,848 --> 00:56:34,224
- "Refractories"?
1311
00:56:34,225 --> 00:56:35,599
- A new popal revelate.
1312
00:56:35,600 --> 00:56:37,165
Uh, John,
1313
00:56:37,166 --> 00:56:38,728
chapter 7, verse 2.
1314
00:56:38,729 --> 00:56:40,313
"Popal"?
1315
00:56:40,314 --> 00:56:42,316
Uh, sisters.
1316
00:56:42,317 --> 00:56:44,317
Michael, chapter 7, verse 2.
1317
00:56:44,318 --> 00:56:46,485
"Sing as ye play."
1318
00:56:46,486 --> 00:56:48,405
Yea, unto thee
1319
00:56:48,406 --> 00:56:50,323
"a voice like a blenth."
1320
00:56:50,324 --> 00:56:51,617
And as you approach
1321
00:56:51,618 --> 00:56:52,909
the allo tropo, please,
1322
00:56:52,910 --> 00:56:54,954
tres mucho
1323
00:56:54,955 --> 00:56:56,996
picante abierto.
1324
00:56:56,997 --> 00:56:58,874
♪
1325
00:56:58,875 --> 00:57:00,751
- ♪ You know you make me
1326
00:56:56,997 --> 00:57:00,750
want to shout ♪
1327
00:57:00,751 --> 00:57:02,253
♪ kick my heels up and shout
1328
00:57:02,254 --> 00:57:03,753
throw my hands up and shout ♪
1329
00:57:03,754 --> 00:57:05,214
♪ throw my head back and shout
1330
00:57:05,215 --> 00:57:06,672
come on now ♪
1331
00:57:06,673 --> 00:57:07,862
♪ don't forget
1332
00:57:07,863 --> 00:57:09,050
to say you will ♪
1333
00:57:09,051 --> 00:57:10,574
♪
1334
00:57:10,575 --> 00:57:12,096
- Are you gentlemen
1335
00:57:09,051 --> 00:57:12,095
with Rancor?
1336
00:57:13,890 --> 00:57:15,681
- Steele's here somewhere.
1337
00:57:15,682 --> 00:57:17,038
- ♪ Sing it right now, baby ♪
1338
00:57:17,039 --> 00:57:18,393
- Well, find him!
1339
00:57:18,394 --> 00:57:19,562
- ♪ Say you will ♪
1340
00:57:19,563 --> 00:57:20,728
- ♪ come on come on ♪
1341
00:57:20,729 --> 00:57:23,044
- ♪ say you will ♪
1342
00:57:23,045 --> 00:57:25,358
- ♪ say that you will ♪
1343
00:57:25,359 --> 00:57:26,777
♪ say that you
1344
00:57:26,778 --> 00:57:28,194
love me ♪
1345
00:57:28,195 --> 00:57:29,780
♪ say that you need me
1346
00:57:29,781 --> 00:57:31,364
say that you want me ♪
1347
00:57:31,365 --> 00:57:33,033
- ♪ you want to please me ♪
1348
00:57:33,034 --> 00:57:34,700
- ♪ come on now ♪
1349
00:57:34,701 --> 00:57:36,996
♪ come on now
1350
00:57:36,997 --> 00:57:39,289
come on now ♪
1351
00:57:39,290 --> 00:57:41,772
♪ I still remember when
1352
00:57:41,773 --> 00:57:44,252
I used to be nine years old ♪
1353
00:57:44,253 --> 00:57:46,005
- ♪ hey, yeah
1354
00:57:46,006 --> 00:57:47,756
and I was a fool for you ♪
1355
00:57:44,253 --> 00:57:47,755
- All right, random inspection.
1356
00:57:47,756 --> 00:57:49,341
- ♪ From the bottom of my soul ♪
1357
00:57:49,342 --> 00:57:50,925
- Directive 21, psalm 2.
1358
00:57:50,926 --> 00:57:53,324
♪ Yeah, yeah
1359
00:57:53,325 --> 00:57:55,721
I want you to know ♪
1360
00:57:55,722 --> 00:57:57,829
- ♪ I said I want you
1361
00:57:57,830 --> 00:57:59,935
to know right now ♪
1362
00:57:55,722 --> 00:57:59,934
- Ew!
1363
00:57:59,935 --> 00:58:01,249
♪ You been good to me
1364
00:58:01,250 --> 00:58:02,561
sisters ♪
1365
00:58:02,562 --> 00:58:04,022
♪ much better than
1366
00:58:04,023 --> 00:58:05,481
I've been to myself ♪
1367
00:58:05,482 --> 00:58:07,858
♪ so good, so good ♪
1368
00:58:07,859 --> 00:58:10,425
♪ and if you ever leave me
1369
00:58:10,426 --> 00:58:12,989
I don't want nobody else ♪
1370
00:58:12,990 --> 00:58:15,451
♪ hey, hey
1371
00:58:15,452 --> 00:58:17,910
I said I want you to know ♪
1372
00:58:17,911 --> 00:58:19,308
♪ I said I want you
1373
00:58:19,309 --> 00:58:20,704
to know right now ♪
1374
00:58:20,705 --> 00:58:21,748
- Veronique?
1375
00:58:21,749 --> 00:58:22,790
♪
1376
00:58:22,791 --> 00:58:23,980
- Dick.
1377
00:58:23,981 --> 00:58:25,168
- You all right?
1378
00:58:25,169 --> 00:58:26,483
Get out of here.
1379
00:58:26,484 --> 00:58:27,795
This is a front for Rancor.
1380
00:58:27,796 --> 00:58:29,922
Yes, I know.
1381
00:58:29,923 --> 00:58:31,383
I'll... I'll get
1382
00:58:31,384 --> 00:58:32,842
out of here, all right.
1383
00:58:32,843 --> 00:58:35,845
But you're coming with me.
1384
00:58:35,846 --> 00:58:37,681
- Stat! Code yellow!
- Code yellow!
1385
00:58:37,684 --> 00:58:38,953
- Get me three CCs
1386
00:58:38,954 --> 00:58:40,225
of epinephrinox!
1387
00:58:37,681 --> 00:58:40,224
- Right away.
1388
00:58:40,225 --> 00:58:41,560
- Get me two liters of gasohol
1389
00:58:41,561 --> 00:58:42,894
mixed with neonephicine!
1390
00:58:40,225 --> 00:58:42,893
- On my way.
1391
00:58:42,894 --> 00:58:45,272
- Get the electrostatifyer, now! - I'll warm up
- the generator, sister.
1392
00:58:45,275 --> 00:58:46,649
She's about to go
1393
00:58:46,650 --> 00:58:48,024
into fibrolcanination!
1394
00:58:48,025 --> 00:58:49,297
- Prepare the operating room!
1395
00:58:49,298 --> 00:58:50,568
- Yes, sister.
1396
00:58:48,025 --> 00:58:50,567
I'll get right on it.
1397
00:58:50,568 --> 00:58:53,404
♪
1398
00:58:53,405 --> 00:58:55,428
For God's sake, can anyone
1399
00:58:55,429 --> 00:58:57,450
in this hospital help me?
1400
00:58:59,621 --> 00:59:01,787
- ♪ Say it right now, baby ♪
1401
00:59:01,788 --> 00:59:03,082
- ♪ come on, come on ♪
1402
00:59:05,625 --> 00:59:06,772
- ♪ Say that you will ♪
1403
00:59:09,922 --> 00:59:11,922
- ♪ Now wait a minute ♪
1404
00:59:13,551 --> 00:59:15,176
Oh. Mm-mm. No.
1405
00:59:15,177 --> 00:59:16,303
♪ You know you make me
1406
00:59:16,304 --> 00:59:17,428
want to shout ♪
1407
00:59:17,429 --> 00:59:19,869
[ Screams,
1408
00:59:27,064 --> 00:59:29,107
High blood pressure.
1409
00:59:33,529 --> 00:59:35,969
Here. You'll be safe here.
1410
00:59:35,970 --> 00:59:38,409
I'll be right back.
1411
00:59:40,202 --> 00:59:42,746
[ Veronique gasping,
1412
00:59:49,191 --> 00:59:51,295
- Okay, the coast is clear.
1413
00:59:53,737 --> 00:59:56,175
Oh, Dick, it's so cold.
1414
00:59:56,176 --> 00:59:58,095
What have they done to you?
1415
00:59:58,096 --> 01:00:00,013
They'll pay for this.
1416
01:00:01,390 --> 01:00:02,891
Oh, Dick...
1417
01:00:11,463 --> 01:00:12,900
Move 'em, fat heads!
1418
01:00:12,901 --> 01:00:15,820
Sisters, make 'em holy!
1419
01:00:18,031 --> 01:00:20,657
Oh, Dick, you came for me.
1420
01:00:20,658 --> 01:00:22,431
Tell me,
1421
01:00:22,432 --> 01:00:24,203
what's been happening?
1422
01:00:24,204 --> 01:00:26,165
Well, I've been doing a lot
1423
01:00:26,166 --> 01:00:28,125
of soul-searching, getting
1424
01:00:24,204 --> 01:00:28,124
in touch with my inner child.
1425
01:00:28,125 --> 01:00:30,209
I have decided I love you.
1426
01:00:30,210 --> 01:00:32,628
But what about my father?
1427
01:00:32,629 --> 01:00:34,277
Well, I like him; I just
1428
01:00:34,278 --> 01:00:35,923
have to get to know him better.
1429
01:00:35,924 --> 01:00:37,155
No, is he okay?
1430
01:00:37,156 --> 01:00:38,384
Have you got his chip?
1431
01:00:38,385 --> 01:00:39,657
Oh, no, he's fine,
1432
01:00:39,658 --> 01:00:40,928
and I've got the chip.
1433
01:00:40,929 --> 01:00:42,118
- Oh, I love you too.
1434
01:00:48,396 --> 01:00:49,937
- Look out, you crazy nun!
1435
01:00:56,861 --> 01:00:58,384
Thanks, guys, I stopped you.
1436
01:00:58,385 --> 01:00:59,905
You could have been killed!
1437
01:00:59,906 --> 01:01:01,804
- Quick, let me help.
1438
01:01:03,701 --> 01:01:05,454
You smell nice.
1439
01:01:08,875 --> 01:01:10,291
- Where is my father?
1440
01:01:10,292 --> 01:01:12,335
Is he safe?
1441
01:01:12,336 --> 01:01:14,213
He's safe, Veronique.
1442
01:01:14,214 --> 01:01:16,088
Safe as you and me.
1443
01:01:17,175 --> 01:01:18,257
- So cute.
1444
01:01:18,258 --> 01:01:19,655
- Oh! Oh!
1445
01:01:21,052 --> 01:01:22,137
- Safer.
1446
01:01:25,078 --> 01:01:26,933
In my country, when an irate,
1447
01:01:23,221 --> 01:01:26,932
armless, psychotic weirdo
1448
01:01:26,933 --> 01:01:28,893
- chase your woman,
- you must hide her.
1449
01:01:30,061 --> 01:01:31,855
- Upstairs.
- Apartment 5b.
1450
01:01:31,858 --> 01:01:33,002
I'll wait downstairs.
1451
01:01:33,003 --> 01:01:34,149
I'll keep my eyes open.
1452
01:01:38,028 --> 01:01:39,550
I just put in new carpet.
1453
01:01:39,551 --> 01:01:41,072
Take your shoes off.
1454
01:01:48,913 --> 01:01:51,353
Oh, Dick...
1455
01:01:51,354 --> 01:01:53,792
It is so nice to know
1456
01:01:53,793 --> 01:01:55,378
that everything
1457
01:01:55,379 --> 01:01:56,963
is going to be all right.
1458
01:01:58,423 --> 01:02:01,091
You have the chip.
1459
01:02:01,092 --> 01:02:03,845
My father is safe.
1460
01:02:05,138 --> 01:02:08,098
You love me, Dick.
1461
01:02:08,099 --> 01:02:09,809
Love?
1462
01:02:11,061 --> 01:02:13,167
Let me tell you
1463
01:02:13,168 --> 01:02:15,272
about love, Veronique.
1464
01:02:15,273 --> 01:02:17,108
Love is a dew drop
1465
01:02:17,109 --> 01:02:18,942
on a rose petal.
1466
01:02:20,509 --> 01:02:22,071
- Love is a drop of rain,
1467
01:02:22,072 --> 01:02:23,761
pure and shimmering
1468
01:02:23,762 --> 01:02:25,449
and trembling.
1469
01:02:25,450 --> 01:02:28,536
So moist, so wet.
1470
01:02:31,207 --> 01:02:33,875
- And those tiny
1471
01:02:28,537 --> 01:02:33,874
little drops of love,
1472
01:02:33,875 --> 01:02:35,918
they come together,
1473
01:02:35,919 --> 01:02:38,046
gathering up broken buds
1474
01:02:38,047 --> 01:02:40,172
and fallen flowers,
1475
01:02:40,173 --> 01:02:44,427
and dirt and dung,
1476
01:02:44,428 --> 01:02:45,533
- and deer droppings,
1477
01:02:46,638 --> 01:02:49,037
Flowing faster and faster,
1478
01:02:49,038 --> 01:02:51,434
outward to the sea.
1479
01:02:51,435 --> 01:02:52,770
- Onward and onward...
1480
01:03:17,961 --> 01:03:19,878
Good night.
1481
01:03:19,879 --> 01:03:21,694
We'll talk more
1482
01:03:21,695 --> 01:03:23,508
in the morning.
1483
01:03:52,267 --> 01:03:53,412
- Hey, hotshots.
1484
01:03:53,413 --> 01:03:55,541
- Come and get me.
1485
01:03:55,542 --> 01:03:57,668
- Why, you little, no-good
1486
01:03:53,413 --> 01:03:57,667
juvenile delinquent!
1487
01:03:57,668 --> 01:03:59,503
- Go on! Get him!
- Come on!
1488
01:04:01,338 --> 01:04:02,902
- Cool.
1489
01:04:02,903 --> 01:04:04,466
- Heads up!
1490
01:04:06,009 --> 01:04:07,219
- Nice shot.
1491
01:04:07,220 --> 01:04:08,428
- I'm going.
1492
01:04:06,009 --> 01:04:08,427
- Go on! Go on!
1493
01:04:08,428 --> 01:04:10,242
- We got you now!
1494
01:04:12,056 --> 01:04:14,099
Where's the professor?
1495
01:04:14,100 --> 01:04:16,393
With Gilligan, Dickweed.
1496
01:04:16,394 --> 01:04:18,417
[ Glass shatters,
1497
01:04:20,440 --> 01:04:21,984
- No!
1498
01:04:21,985 --> 01:04:23,527
- This is for
1499
01:04:20,440 --> 01:04:23,526
getting even with dad!
1500
01:04:23,527 --> 01:04:24,841
- And this is for my girl.
1501
01:04:24,842 --> 01:04:26,153
- And this is for my girl 2.
1502
01:04:26,154 --> 01:04:29,239
I wasn't even in my girl 2.
1503
01:04:29,240 --> 01:04:30,638
We don't care!
1504
01:04:30,639 --> 01:04:32,035
We don't care!
1505
01:04:34,663 --> 01:04:36,748
- Last time I'm gonna ask you,
- smart boy.
1506
01:04:36,751 --> 01:04:38,874
Where's the professor?
1507
01:04:38,875 --> 01:04:40,544
Okay, okay,
1508
01:04:40,545 --> 01:04:42,211
down the hall to the right.
1509
01:04:42,212 --> 01:04:44,756
Okay, the left!
1510
01:04:49,638 --> 01:04:50,720
Help! Somebody help me!
1511
01:04:52,620 --> 01:04:54,516
They're taking us
1512
01:04:50,721 --> 01:04:54,516
to kikiree island!
1513
01:04:57,561 --> 01:04:59,146
- They've taken him to Rancor!
1514
01:04:59,147 --> 01:05:00,730
- They won't kill him...
1515
01:05:00,731 --> 01:05:01,815
Not until he's installed
1516
01:05:01,816 --> 01:05:02,898
the chip.
1517
01:05:02,899 --> 01:05:04,672
Probably not even then.
1518
01:05:04,673 --> 01:05:06,443
Maybe just torture him a little.
1519
01:05:06,444 --> 01:05:08,405
- - We'll talk about
- this on the way.
1520
01:05:08,408 --> 01:05:10,615
Let's get to kikiree.
1521
01:05:22,420 --> 01:05:23,836
You like this disguise?
1522
01:05:23,837 --> 01:05:25,755
It's very good.
1523
01:05:25,756 --> 01:05:27,757
I'm proud of this one.
1524
01:05:27,758 --> 01:05:29,551
Like this,
1525
01:05:29,552 --> 01:05:31,343
I can look like anybody.
1526
01:05:33,431 --> 01:05:35,515
- Rancor industries
1527
01:05:31,344 --> 01:05:35,514
owns this little island.
1528
01:05:35,515 --> 01:05:36,642
The natives say there are
1529
01:05:36,643 --> 01:05:37,767
stranger goings-on here
1530
01:05:37,768 --> 01:05:38,977
than at neverland
1531
01:05:38,978 --> 01:05:40,185
valley ranch.
1532
01:05:40,186 --> 01:05:41,771
- Look.
1533
01:05:41,772 --> 01:05:43,356
- Uh-huh. It's nice.
1534
01:05:44,566 --> 01:05:46,610
- Kabul, stay in the boat.
1535
01:05:46,611 --> 01:05:48,652
- Why?
1536
01:05:48,653 --> 01:05:49,821
There's a saying
1537
01:05:49,822 --> 01:05:50,987
in my country:
1538
01:05:50,988 --> 01:05:52,532
"When you hear the words,"
1539
01:05:52,533 --> 01:05:54,075
'stay in the boat, '
1540
01:05:50,988 --> 01:05:54,074
"you stay in the boat."
1541
01:05:55,223 --> 01:05:56,369
- Bye-bye.
1542
01:06:03,960 --> 01:06:06,754
Dick, this is crazy.
1543
01:06:06,755 --> 01:06:08,361
Crazy? Some people think
1544
01:06:08,362 --> 01:06:09,965
walking down the street
1545
01:06:09,966 --> 01:06:11,802
- muttering to yourself
- is crazy.
1546
01:06:11,805 --> 01:06:13,011
I'll tell you
1547
01:06:13,012 --> 01:06:14,219
what crazy is.
1548
01:06:14,220 --> 01:06:15,514
Crazy is walking
1549
01:06:15,515 --> 01:06:16,807
down the street with half
1550
01:06:14,220 --> 01:06:16,806
a cantaloupe on your head,
1551
01:06:16,807 --> 01:06:17,975
saying,
1552
01:06:17,976 --> 01:06:19,141
"I'm a hamster."
1553
01:06:19,142 --> 01:06:20,581
"I'm a hamster."
1554
01:06:20,582 --> 01:06:22,019
That's crazy.
1555
01:06:28,652 --> 01:06:29,737
- Ooh.
1556
01:06:30,821 --> 01:06:32,343
My life's work
1557
01:06:32,344 --> 01:06:33,864
is now complete.
1558
01:06:33,865 --> 01:06:35,283
Your cooperation
1559
01:06:35,284 --> 01:06:36,700
is commendable, professor.
1560
01:06:36,701 --> 01:06:38,829
Thank you.
1561
01:06:41,581 --> 01:06:42,582
Throw him
1562
01:06:42,583 --> 01:06:43,583
in the cell.
1563
01:06:43,584 --> 01:06:45,314
- But you said it was
1564
01:06:45,315 --> 01:06:47,044
for the world peace!
1565
01:06:43,583 --> 01:06:47,044
- Yeah, yeah.
1566
01:06:55,303 --> 01:06:57,514
Hello, general. It's skippy.
1567
01:06:57,515 --> 01:06:59,723
They're on the island.
1568
01:07:00,956 --> 01:07:02,184
- Yeah.
1569
01:07:02,185 --> 01:07:04,041
Well, well, well,
1570
01:07:04,042 --> 01:07:05,896
what perfect timing.
1571
01:07:05,897 --> 01:07:06,940
- It seems we're gonna
1572
01:07:06,941 --> 01:07:07,983
have more guests.
1573
01:07:07,983 --> 01:07:09,067
- Steele's not dead.
1574
01:07:10,151 --> 01:07:12,152
He's on his way here.
1575
01:07:12,153 --> 01:07:13,989
- Throw her in with the others!
1576
01:07:13,990 --> 01:07:15,823
- No! Please! Please!
1577
01:07:15,824 --> 01:07:17,889
- I thought you loved me!
1578
01:07:17,890 --> 01:07:19,952
- Nah, I was just usin' you.
1579
01:07:21,539 --> 01:07:23,122
Seven hours, 59 minutes
1580
01:07:19,953 --> 01:07:23,121
and 41 seconds.
1581
01:07:23,122 --> 01:07:24,791
Seven hours, 59 minutes
1582
01:07:24,792 --> 01:07:26,458
and 38 seconds.
1583
01:07:26,459 --> 01:07:28,419
- Seven hours, 59 minutes
- and 30...
1584
01:07:35,449 --> 01:07:36,844
- Dick, look out!
1585
01:07:38,306 --> 01:07:39,764
- Got you now, Steele.
1586
01:07:41,016 --> 01:07:42,892
Hey, where you goin'?
1587
01:07:44,416 --> 01:07:45,937
- Take that!
1588
01:07:48,147 --> 01:07:50,233
Hey, come back here!
1589
01:07:53,152 --> 01:07:54,738
Nowhere to go, Steele.
1590
01:08:01,288 --> 01:08:02,829
How fast can you run,
1591
01:08:02,830 --> 01:08:04,371
my friend?
1592
01:08:05,770 --> 01:08:07,166
- My God!
1593
01:08:08,793 --> 01:08:09,794
All right, men,
1594
01:08:09,795 --> 01:08:10,795
tie him up.
1595
01:08:12,340 --> 01:08:13,881
- Okay, go ahead, kill me.
1596
01:08:13,882 --> 01:08:15,759
I got a bomb. You touch me,
1597
01:08:15,760 --> 01:08:17,634
and you'll blow up yourself.
1598
01:08:17,635 --> 01:08:19,950
You don't really think
1599
01:08:19,951 --> 01:08:22,265
I'm gonna fall for that old
1600
01:08:17,635 --> 01:08:22,265
tied-to-the-bomb trick, do ya?
1601
01:08:26,458 --> 01:08:28,688
- Well, how about
1602
01:08:24,225 --> 01:08:28,687
the old snake trick?
1603
01:08:30,420 --> 01:08:32,148
- Ahh!
1604
01:08:39,282 --> 01:08:42,222
[ Dinosaur roaring,
1605
01:08:52,378 --> 01:08:53,421
- What is it?
1606
01:08:53,422 --> 01:08:54,463
- Shh.
1607
01:09:04,037 --> 01:09:05,641
- Let's go.
1608
01:09:05,642 --> 01:09:07,915
Two hours, 59 minutes
1609
01:09:07,916 --> 01:09:10,186
and 26 seconds to launch.
1610
01:09:10,187 --> 01:09:12,044
Two hours, 59 minutes
1611
01:09:12,045 --> 01:09:13,899
and 21 seconds to launch.
1612
01:09:13,900 --> 01:09:15,568
Two hours, 59 minutes
1613
01:09:15,569 --> 01:09:17,235
and 19 seconds to launch.
1614
01:09:18,864 --> 01:09:20,490
We've got to find a way
1615
01:09:17,236 --> 01:09:20,489
into Rancor's complex.
1616
01:09:20,490 --> 01:09:21,679
- Are you ready?
1617
01:09:21,680 --> 01:09:22,867
- Ready.
1618
01:10:02,907 --> 01:10:04,783
Here, help me with this.
1619
01:10:04,784 --> 01:10:06,474
- How patriotic, Dick.
1620
01:10:06,475 --> 01:10:08,162
- And deadly.
1621
01:10:08,163 --> 01:10:10,081
Ooh, Dick.
1622
01:10:19,800 --> 01:10:20,841
Bearing 177.5.
1623
01:10:20,842 --> 01:10:22,323
On my mark.
1624
01:10:22,324 --> 01:10:23,802
Hi, mark.
1625
01:10:23,803 --> 01:10:26,680
Get set.
1626
01:10:26,681 --> 01:10:27,953
- Father!
1627
01:10:27,954 --> 01:10:29,224
- My child.
1628
01:10:29,225 --> 01:10:31,665
Well, well.
1629
01:10:31,666 --> 01:10:34,104
Dick Steele.
1630
01:10:34,105 --> 01:10:35,649
I'd shake your hand,
1631
01:10:35,650 --> 01:10:37,192
but I don't remember
1632
01:10:34,105 --> 01:10:37,191
where it landed.
1633
01:10:37,192 --> 01:10:39,090
- Clever! Clever? Clever.
1634
01:10:40,987 --> 01:10:43,406
Take their weapons.
1635
01:10:47,933 --> 01:10:49,037
- Mm-hmm.
1636
01:10:50,830 --> 01:10:52,707
Throw her in with the others.
1637
01:10:52,708 --> 01:10:54,584
Bind him.
1638
01:10:59,841 --> 01:11:01,757
- Oh, papa.
1639
01:11:01,758 --> 01:11:03,406
- Dick Steele?
1640
01:11:03,407 --> 01:11:05,053
- Oh, Ms. Dahl.
1641
01:11:06,721 --> 01:11:08,472
- Barbara Dahl.
- Get your paws off me,
1642
01:11:08,475 --> 01:11:10,433
you damn dirty apes!
1643
01:11:14,854 --> 01:11:16,814
- No! - You remember
- Barbara Dahl.
1644
01:11:16,817 --> 01:11:19,149
Victoria's daughter?
1645
01:11:19,150 --> 01:11:20,255
I'd like to see you watch
1646
01:11:20,256 --> 01:11:21,359
her go up
1647
01:11:21,360 --> 01:11:22,820
like you watched
1648
01:11:22,821 --> 01:11:24,279
her mother go down.
1649
01:11:24,280 --> 01:11:26,700
But I'd rather let you
1650
01:11:26,701 --> 01:11:29,119
just be a dessert
1651
01:11:24,280 --> 01:11:29,118
for my little pet.
1652
01:11:31,082 --> 01:11:32,435
What's left of you will have
1653
01:11:32,436 --> 01:11:33,789
to watch helplessly
1654
01:11:33,790 --> 01:11:36,334
while I play mortal kombat
1655
01:11:36,335 --> 01:11:38,877
with the entire world!
1656
01:12:20,858 --> 01:12:23,338
- Huh?
1657
01:12:32,308 --> 01:12:33,933
- It's gonna blow!
1658
01:12:30,680 --> 01:12:33,933
Hurry up!
1659
01:12:37,937 --> 01:12:39,856
[ Veronique continues
1660
01:12:44,902 --> 01:12:46,529
- Come on!
1661
01:13:31,763 --> 01:13:32,866
You are very immature.
1662
01:13:32,867 --> 01:13:34,098
Bullies tend to have
1663
01:13:34,099 --> 01:13:35,327
very bad self-esteem.
1664
01:13:37,496 --> 01:13:41,167
Aha!
1665
01:13:42,210 --> 01:13:45,129
Oh-ho!
1666
01:13:47,882 --> 01:13:49,238
Leave me alone!
1667
01:13:49,239 --> 01:13:50,593
I'm an unarmed man!
1668
01:14:21,624 --> 01:14:23,689
- Oh, miss Cheevus.
1669
01:14:23,690 --> 01:14:25,752
- Dick, I'm sorry.
1670
01:14:25,753 --> 01:14:27,422
- One minute and 22 seconds.
1671
01:14:27,423 --> 01:14:29,090
One minute and 21 seconds.
1672
01:14:29,090 --> 01:14:30,320
- One minute and 20 seconds.
1673
01:14:30,321 --> 01:14:31,550
- You were under the influence
1674
01:14:29,090 --> 01:14:31,549
of an evil man.
1675
01:14:31,550 --> 01:14:32,718
- One minute and 19 seconds.
1676
01:14:32,719 --> 01:14:33,886
- It was still
1677
01:14:31,550 --> 01:14:33,885
a lousy thing to do.
1678
01:14:33,886 --> 01:14:35,867
One minute and 18 seconds.
1679
01:14:35,868 --> 01:14:37,847
One minute and 17 seconds.
1680
01:14:37,848 --> 01:14:39,975
One minute and 16 seconds.
1681
01:14:39,976 --> 01:14:41,144
Oh-oh.
1682
01:14:41,145 --> 01:14:42,311
General, it's broken.
1683
01:14:42,312 --> 01:14:44,231
Well, you'll like space.
1684
01:14:44,232 --> 01:14:46,148
Lots of elbow room and...
1685
01:14:46,149 --> 01:14:47,421
- One minute and 12 seconds.
1686
01:14:47,422 --> 01:14:48,691
- Oh, whoops. Sorry.
1687
01:14:48,692 --> 01:14:50,632
- One minute and 11 seconds.
1688
01:14:50,633 --> 01:14:52,571
One minute and ten seconds.
1689
01:14:52,571 --> 01:14:55,407
Yeah, you lose, Steele!
1690
01:14:55,408 --> 01:14:57,118
- That countdown
- is irreversible!
1691
01:14:58,788 --> 01:15:00,454
- Really?
1692
01:15:00,455 --> 01:15:01,956
- One minute and five seconds.
- Well...
1693
01:15:01,959 --> 01:15:03,145
- Let's just see how...
1694
01:15:03,146 --> 01:15:04,333
- We need to go!
1695
01:15:04,334 --> 01:15:05,731
- One minute and three seconds.
1696
01:15:05,732 --> 01:15:07,127
- Irreversible that really is.
1697
01:15:07,128 --> 01:15:09,171
It's irreversible,
1698
01:15:09,172 --> 01:15:10,986
and there's nothing
1699
01:15:10,987 --> 01:15:12,800
you patriotic pansies
1700
01:15:09,172 --> 01:15:12,799
can do about it!
1701
01:15:12,800 --> 01:15:15,052
- Let me tell you
- what being patriotic really is,
1702
01:15:15,055 --> 01:15:17,971
you scumbag poop.
1703
01:15:17,972 --> 01:15:19,724
This is a great country
1704
01:15:19,725 --> 01:15:21,476
where a man can sue anyone
1705
01:15:17,972 --> 01:15:21,475
he wants anytime he wants.
1706
01:15:21,476 --> 01:15:23,436
It's a great country
1707
01:15:23,437 --> 01:15:25,396
because thousands of people
1708
01:15:21,476 --> 01:15:25,395
die every year
1709
01:15:25,396 --> 01:15:26,647
from handguns, and,
1710
01:15:26,648 --> 01:15:27,897
yet, at this very moment,
1711
01:15:27,898 --> 01:15:30,380
you can still walk into
1712
01:15:30,381 --> 01:15:32,862
a convenience store anywhere
1713
01:15:27,898 --> 01:15:32,861
and buy one of those guns.
1714
01:15:32,862 --> 01:15:34,155
- That's democracy.
1715
01:15:34,156 --> 01:15:35,448
- It's finally time
1716
01:15:32,862 --> 01:15:35,447
somebody does
1717
01:15:35,448 --> 01:15:36,532
what that fool Steele
1718
01:15:36,533 --> 01:15:37,615
should have done.
1719
01:15:37,616 --> 01:15:38,805
- This is a great country...
1720
01:15:38,806 --> 01:15:39,993
- And it's gonna be me!
1721
01:15:39,994 --> 01:15:41,141
Because anyone who's male
1722
01:15:41,142 --> 01:15:42,287
has the right...
1723
01:15:42,288 --> 01:15:44,580
Let's go!
1724
01:15:44,581 --> 01:15:46,396
- To run for the office
1725
01:15:46,397 --> 01:15:48,211
of the president.
1726
01:15:44,581 --> 01:15:48,210
- Let's go! Move it!
1727
01:15:48,211 --> 01:15:49,713
- This is a great country
1728
01:15:49,714 --> 01:15:51,214
because any moron can...
1729
01:15:52,424 --> 01:15:53,632
All right, everyone,
1730
01:15:51,214 --> 01:15:53,631
drop your guns!
1731
01:15:53,632 --> 01:15:55,885
I'm, uh, taking over!
1732
01:15:58,388 --> 01:16:00,889
Steele... get down from there.
1733
01:16:02,810 --> 01:16:04,726
- Dick, come on. We have to go.
1734
01:16:04,727 --> 01:16:06,187
- Now!
1735
01:16:06,188 --> 01:16:07,645
- Oh!
1736
01:16:07,646 --> 01:16:08,647
- Come on! Come on!
1737
01:16:08,648 --> 01:16:09,648
- I wasn't finished.
1738
01:16:10,692 --> 01:16:11,734
Quick! Hurry up!
1739
01:16:09,648 --> 01:16:11,733
Just move it!
1740
01:16:12,778 --> 01:16:13,818
Twenty seconds.
1741
01:16:16,822 --> 01:16:18,491
Steele, you're always
1742
01:16:18,492 --> 01:16:20,159
doing this to me!
1743
01:16:23,872 --> 01:16:25,121
- You lose, Steele!
1744
01:16:25,122 --> 01:16:26,144
I'm not through!
1745
01:16:26,145 --> 01:16:27,165
I'll be back!
1746
01:16:27,166 --> 01:16:28,355
Maybe just tissue
1747
01:16:28,356 --> 01:16:29,543
or a brain!
1748
01:16:29,544 --> 01:16:31,108
- Open the door!
1749
01:16:31,109 --> 01:16:32,671
I'm stuck in here!
1750
01:16:29,544 --> 01:16:32,670
- I'll be back!
1751
01:16:32,671 --> 01:16:34,549
- I'm going up, but you
1752
01:16:34,550 --> 01:16:36,426
and your whole world...
1753
01:16:36,426 --> 01:16:38,552
Are going down!
1754
01:16:38,553 --> 01:16:39,909
- I'll be back,
1755
01:16:39,910 --> 01:16:41,264
maybe without legs...
1756
01:16:38,553 --> 01:16:41,263
- Open the damn door!
1757
01:16:41,264 --> 01:16:43,287
- Or some other minor organ.
1758
01:16:43,288 --> 01:16:45,309
- Wait! I don't want
1759
01:16:41,264 --> 01:16:45,308
to miss the fireworks!
1760
01:16:57,029 --> 01:16:58,322
How about a hand
1761
01:16:58,323 --> 01:16:59,615
for general Rancor?
1762
01:17:03,433 --> 01:17:05,412
You're not through with me!
1763
01:17:05,413 --> 01:17:06,810
- Ah, well.
1764
01:17:09,397 --> 01:17:10,584
Houston, we have a problem.
1765
01:17:20,010 --> 01:17:25,182
♪
1766
01:17:28,894 --> 01:17:31,626
♪ A man of intrigue
1767
01:17:31,627 --> 01:17:34,358
he lives for the thrill ♪
1768
01:17:37,403 --> 01:17:40,490
♪ always has places to go
1769
01:17:40,491 --> 01:17:43,576
and people to kill ♪
1770
01:17:45,369 --> 01:17:47,163
♪ danger is
1771
01:17:47,164 --> 01:17:48,955
the game he plays ♪
1772
01:17:48,956 --> 01:17:52,959
♪ and he holds every card ♪
1773
01:17:52,960 --> 01:17:56,171
♪ 'cause if you wanna win ♪
1774
01:17:56,172 --> 01:18:00,134
♪ you gotta spy hard ♪
1775
01:18:02,595 --> 01:18:05,327
♪ a man of the world
1776
01:18:05,328 --> 01:18:08,058
so suave and discreet ♪
1777
01:18:10,520 --> 01:18:13,356
♪ he trips over the women
1778
01:18:13,357 --> 01:18:16,192
piled up at his feet ♪
1779
01:18:19,445 --> 01:18:21,904
♪ but evil's lurking ♪
1780
01:18:21,905 --> 01:18:24,304
♪ so he's always
1781
01:18:24,305 --> 01:18:26,701
on his guard ♪
1782
01:18:26,702 --> 01:18:29,912
♪ 'cause if you're gonna spy ♪
1783
01:18:29,913 --> 01:18:35,335
♪ you better spy hard ♪
1784
01:18:35,336 --> 01:18:39,088
♪ he's always there ♪
1785
01:18:39,089 --> 01:18:41,446
♪ when the chips
1786
01:18:41,447 --> 01:18:43,801
are beginning to fall ♪
1787
01:18:43,802 --> 01:18:47,222
♪ he wouldn't care ♪
1788
01:18:47,223 --> 01:18:48,558
♪ if they kicked him
1789
01:18:48,559 --> 01:18:49,891
and grabbed him ♪
1790
01:18:49,892 --> 01:18:50,956
♪ and shot him
1791
01:18:50,957 --> 01:18:52,018
and stabbed him ♪
1792
01:18:52,019 --> 01:18:54,126
♪ and nailed both his ears
1793
01:18:54,127 --> 01:18:56,232
to the wall ♪
1794
01:18:57,692 --> 01:18:59,942
♪ facing death every day ♪
1795
01:18:59,943 --> 01:19:04,947
♪ is a tough job for any man ♪
1796
01:19:04,948 --> 01:19:08,577
♪ but his hours are flexible ♪
1797
01:19:08,578 --> 01:19:10,371
♪ and he's got
1798
01:19:10,372 --> 01:19:12,164
a great dental plan ♪
1799
01:19:13,541 --> 01:19:15,460
♪ by the way
1800
01:19:15,461 --> 01:19:17,377
if you walked in late ♪
1801
01:19:17,378 --> 01:19:21,631
♪ allow me to reiterate ♪
1802
01:19:21,632 --> 01:19:25,176
♪ the name of this movie ♪
1803
01:19:25,177 --> 01:19:29,138
♪ was spy hard ♪
1804
01:19:29,139 --> 01:19:33,059
♪ they called it spy hard ♪
1805
01:19:33,060 --> 01:19:36,979
♪ you just saw spy hard ♪
1806
01:19:36,980 --> 01:19:43,027
♪ it's the end of spy hard ♪
1807
01:19:43,028 --> 01:19:49,118
♪
1808
01:19:52,246 --> 01:19:55,228
♪ [ Continues holding108579
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