Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:17,007 --> 00:00:18,918
They're creepy and they're kooky
2
00:00:19,007 --> 00:00:20,725
Mysterious and spooky
3
00:00:20,807 --> 00:00:22,684
They're altogether ooky
4
00:00:22,767 --> 00:00:24,678
The Addams family
5
00:00:24,767 --> 00:00:26,598
The house is a museum
6
00:00:26,687 --> 00:00:28,564
When people come to see 'em
7
00:00:28,647 --> 00:00:30,478
They really are a scream
8
00:00:30,567 --> 00:00:32,080
The Addams family
9
00:00:33,367 --> 00:00:34,356
MAN: Neat.
10
00:00:35,007 --> 00:00:35,996
Sweet.
11
00:00:38,887 --> 00:00:39,876
Petite.
12
00:00:39,967 --> 00:00:41,798
So get a witch's shawl on
13
00:00:41,887 --> 00:00:43,718
A broomstick you can crawl on
14
00:00:43,807 --> 00:00:45,604
We're gonna pay a call on
15
00:00:45,687 --> 00:00:48,281
The Addams family
16
00:01:02,607 --> 00:01:04,518
Good morning, Cleopatra.
17
00:01:06,447 --> 00:01:07,721
Here you are, darling.
18
00:01:08,967 --> 00:01:10,161
Don't gulp.
19
00:01:14,287 --> 00:01:15,606
Querida.
20
00:01:16,727 --> 00:01:18,922
Darling. Did you enjoy your breakfast?
21
00:01:19,007 --> 00:01:21,601
- Truly delectable.
- I'm glad.
22
00:01:21,807 --> 00:01:25,038
I spent the whole morning gathering
toadstools for your omelette.
23
00:01:26,207 --> 00:01:28,437
Allow me to express my appreciation
24
00:01:28,527 --> 00:01:32,202
with this new policy on my life,
with you as sole beneficiary.
25
00:01:32,487 --> 00:01:34,796
How thoughtful, darling.
26
00:01:34,887 --> 00:01:36,206
A million dollars.
27
00:01:36,367 --> 00:01:38,597
What a nice round figure, bubele.
28
00:01:41,487 --> 00:01:44,559
Tish, you know what you do
when you call me bubele.
29
00:01:44,687 --> 00:01:46,882
Darling, you've just had breakfast.
30
00:01:47,367 --> 00:01:48,925
You're right.
31
00:01:50,687 --> 00:01:53,326
There's a nice round
double indemnity clause in that policy.
32
00:01:53,407 --> 00:01:55,557
Really? Sounds lovely. What does it mean?
33
00:01:55,647 --> 00:01:57,842
In case of accident
you get twice the amount.
34
00:01:58,767 --> 00:02:00,917
I trust that won't put ideas in your head.
35
00:02:01,527 --> 00:02:02,596
Gomez!
36
00:02:03,207 --> 00:02:04,925
Merely a jest, my dear.
37
00:02:05,207 --> 00:02:07,084
I'm afraid I shall favor you
with my presence
38
00:02:07,167 --> 00:02:09,556
for an exasperatingly long time
39
00:02:09,647 --> 00:02:11,956
with my new physical fitness program.
40
00:02:12,047 --> 00:02:14,038
Darling, where did you get
the Indian clubs?
41
00:02:14,127 --> 00:02:16,197
Where does anyone get old Indian clubs?
42
00:02:16,287 --> 00:02:17,163
From an old Indian.
43
00:02:20,207 --> 00:02:21,481
Darling!
44
00:02:28,607 --> 00:02:30,165
Are you hurt?
45
00:02:30,287 --> 00:02:32,198
Gomez, are you all right?
46
00:02:33,167 --> 00:02:35,556
- Who's Gomez?
- You are.
47
00:02:36,727 --> 00:02:39,082
- Bubele.
- What's a bubele?
48
00:02:40,247 --> 00:02:42,920
This is dreadful.
Has your memory been destroyed?
49
00:02:43,527 --> 00:02:45,165
I don't know. I don't remember.
50
00:02:45,607 --> 00:02:47,484
Oh, my poor darling.
51
00:02:48,967 --> 00:02:51,083
Please. I don't believe we've met.
52
00:02:52,687 --> 00:02:55,201
Gomez, I'm Morticia, your wife.
53
00:02:55,887 --> 00:02:57,559
- I'm married?
- Of course.
54
00:02:58,887 --> 00:03:00,764
- To you?
- Yes.
55
00:03:01,167 --> 00:03:02,885
Why are you wearing black?
56
00:03:02,967 --> 00:03:05,037
Darling, I always wear black.
57
00:03:05,327 --> 00:03:07,079
You said it was so becoming.
58
00:03:07,167 --> 00:03:08,236
I did?
59
00:03:10,567 --> 00:03:12,285
Are you sure we're married?
60
00:03:12,367 --> 00:03:13,402
Well, of...
61
00:03:13,487 --> 00:03:16,843
Look, here's the insurance policy
you bought for me, see?
62
00:03:17,287 --> 00:03:18,800
A million dollars.
63
00:03:19,407 --> 00:03:21,238
Well, I'm glad I have money.
64
00:03:21,807 --> 00:03:24,037
Here, darling, let me help you up.
65
00:03:24,727 --> 00:03:25,955
There.
66
00:03:26,047 --> 00:03:29,164
Now, your name is Gomez Addams.
67
00:03:29,567 --> 00:03:31,797
And you've just had your breakfast.
68
00:03:32,047 --> 00:03:34,163
And you're in your very own home.
69
00:03:34,927 --> 00:03:36,360
Very depressing.
70
00:03:36,887 --> 00:03:38,320
You don't like it?
71
00:03:38,647 --> 00:03:40,638
It looks like a museum
that's been condemned.
72
00:03:41,167 --> 00:03:42,122
Oh, dear.
73
00:03:42,207 --> 00:03:44,516
I must do something to restore your mind.
74
00:03:48,047 --> 00:03:50,117
I was right! The house is falling.
75
00:03:50,607 --> 00:03:52,006
You rang?
76
00:03:52,607 --> 00:03:55,075
- What's that?
- That's our butler, Lurch.
77
00:03:55,567 --> 00:03:57,285
Is it real or do you wind it up?
78
00:03:58,047 --> 00:03:59,241
Gomez!
79
00:03:59,927 --> 00:04:02,760
Mr. Addams seems
to have lost his memory, Lurch.
80
00:04:02,847 --> 00:04:05,077
Perhaps a nice, hot cup of henbane?
81
00:04:05,487 --> 00:04:06,681
Henbane!
82
00:04:08,087 --> 00:04:09,918
Just give me a glass of milk.
83
00:04:10,287 --> 00:04:11,436
Milk?
84
00:04:12,447 --> 00:04:13,960
From a cow?
85
00:04:14,767 --> 00:04:16,758
There's no need to go that far.
86
00:04:16,847 --> 00:04:17,996
Moose milk will do.
87
00:04:18,087 --> 00:04:19,566
Never mind.
88
00:04:20,247 --> 00:04:23,239
Just tell your gargoyle to take off.
He makes me nervous.
89
00:04:27,607 --> 00:04:30,405
Gomez, you hurt Lurch's feelings.
90
00:04:30,927 --> 00:04:33,441
Perhaps a nice visit with the children
would soothe you.
91
00:04:34,247 --> 00:04:35,965
Children? What children?
92
00:04:36,047 --> 00:04:37,685
Our children, dear.
93
00:04:38,207 --> 00:04:40,243
Madam, are you suggesting...
94
00:04:41,127 --> 00:04:44,278
- that we've been more than friends?
- Gomez, we're married.
95
00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:45,595
Oh, I forgot.
96
00:04:45,687 --> 00:04:46,961
Come along, dear.
97
00:04:55,767 --> 00:04:57,837
Children, say hello to your father.
98
00:04:57,927 --> 00:04:59,121
- Hello, Father.
- Hello, Father.
99
00:04:59,207 --> 00:05:00,276
How do you do?
100
00:05:00,567 --> 00:05:03,081
Go right ahead with your playing.
We don't want to disturb you.
101
00:05:06,127 --> 00:05:08,038
Surely you recognize your own offspring?
102
00:05:08,127 --> 00:05:10,436
No, but the girl does resemble you.
103
00:05:10,927 --> 00:05:13,202
And Pugsley is the image of you.
104
00:05:13,727 --> 00:05:16,241
- He is?
- Naturally. Look in the mirror.
105
00:05:17,607 --> 00:05:18,881
I'm afraid.
106
00:05:19,607 --> 00:05:21,165
What the devil is that?
107
00:05:21,247 --> 00:05:23,477
That's Lucifer, my pet.
108
00:05:23,567 --> 00:05:25,478
He's nice and slippery.
109
00:05:26,447 --> 00:05:30,281
I'm going to get you a lovely,
golden-haired doll that says "mama."
110
00:05:30,367 --> 00:05:32,164
But what have I done?
111
00:05:32,247 --> 00:05:34,636
- Nothing.
- Then why are you punishing me?
112
00:05:34,927 --> 00:05:36,679
I'm not punishing you.
113
00:05:36,767 --> 00:05:39,235
I just want you
to get rid of that ghastly bug.
114
00:05:39,407 --> 00:05:40,681
Yes, yes, dear.
115
00:05:40,767 --> 00:05:44,521
Pugsley, why don't you show your father
what you can do with the trains.
116
00:05:44,647 --> 00:05:46,285
Watch this, Father.
117
00:05:53,847 --> 00:05:55,485
Swell wreck, wasn't it?
118
00:05:55,567 --> 00:05:57,000
Swell wreck?
119
00:05:58,287 --> 00:05:59,720
The boy needs help.
120
00:06:01,727 --> 00:06:05,037
Until you pay for those trains,
I am cutting off your allowance.
121
00:06:05,127 --> 00:06:07,038
But I don't get any allowance.
122
00:06:07,127 --> 00:06:09,721
Starting today, you'll get an allowance
so I can cut it off.
123
00:06:10,887 --> 00:06:12,923
There's a touch of madness around here.
124
00:06:15,647 --> 00:06:18,161
Children, your father isn't himself.
125
00:06:18,527 --> 00:06:21,200
And until he gets better
we're just going to have to humor him.
126
00:06:21,287 --> 00:06:23,517
- We understand.
- Father's flipped!
127
00:06:24,727 --> 00:06:25,921
Pugsley!
128
00:06:26,447 --> 00:06:27,721
I'm afraid you're right.
129
00:06:30,447 --> 00:06:33,280
- Why do you keep staring at me?
- Doesn't everyone?
130
00:06:35,167 --> 00:06:38,921
I'm so glad to see you and Uncle Fester
having such a nice chat.
131
00:06:39,007 --> 00:06:40,281
Uncle Fester.
132
00:06:41,327 --> 00:06:43,238
From your side of the family, I hope.
133
00:06:43,327 --> 00:06:45,477
You'll have to excuse him, Uncle Fester.
134
00:06:45,647 --> 00:06:48,844
He's had a lapse of memory.
And a bad shock.
135
00:06:48,927 --> 00:06:50,440
Several bad shocks.
136
00:06:50,527 --> 00:06:53,325
What he needs is a good workout
in the playroom.
137
00:06:53,407 --> 00:06:57,002
A half an hour on the bed of nails
and you'll be in as good a shape as I am.
138
00:06:57,087 --> 00:06:58,566
Now I'm worried.
139
00:06:58,647 --> 00:07:01,605
Come along, darling.
It might do you some good. Come along.
140
00:07:06,127 --> 00:07:07,719
This is the playroom?
141
00:07:07,967 --> 00:07:09,286
Of course.
142
00:07:09,367 --> 00:07:11,437
A place of joy and laughter.
143
00:07:20,287 --> 00:07:23,836
- He's not laughing.
- Lurch holds his laughter inside.
144
00:07:24,407 --> 00:07:25,806
Let it out, Lurch.
145
00:07:32,207 --> 00:07:33,799
Put it back, Lurch.
146
00:07:35,807 --> 00:07:37,798
How's your headache, Uncle Fester?
147
00:07:37,887 --> 00:07:40,117
A couple more turns ought to do it.
148
00:07:52,327 --> 00:07:55,717
Darling, you've always loved this room.
149
00:07:56,127 --> 00:07:57,958
Don't you like it now?
150
00:07:59,847 --> 00:08:01,439
It has its points.
151
00:08:07,247 --> 00:08:09,761
Well, this is an interesting
old woodcarving.
152
00:08:09,847 --> 00:08:11,883
- Me, a woodcarving?
- It's alive!
153
00:08:12,487 --> 00:08:14,796
Mama, he's had a lapse of memory.
154
00:08:14,887 --> 00:08:17,196
I'm thinking of putting him on the rack.
155
00:08:17,287 --> 00:08:19,847
Good idea.
A few twists might straighten him out.
156
00:08:20,127 --> 00:08:21,560
A few twists?
157
00:08:21,647 --> 00:08:24,639
Yes, darling. You see,
we tie your hands and your feet
158
00:08:24,727 --> 00:08:26,877
and then Lurch turns the crank.
159
00:08:26,967 --> 00:08:29,959
- And that will make me better?
- And taller, too.
160
00:08:30,567 --> 00:08:32,444
You're trying to kill me.
161
00:08:32,527 --> 00:08:34,404
- Oh, no, darling.
- Get that double indemnity...
162
00:08:34,487 --> 00:08:36,000
No, no, no.
163
00:08:36,327 --> 00:08:40,320
You're dearer to me than all the bats
in all the caves in the world.
164
00:08:40,807 --> 00:08:42,399
Now trust me, Gomez.
165
00:08:44,087 --> 00:08:45,315
All right.
166
00:08:45,407 --> 00:08:46,886
But I'm not going on that rack.
167
00:08:46,967 --> 00:08:48,764
All right, darling, you don't have to.
168
00:08:48,847 --> 00:08:51,759
Perhaps if you took part
in some simple household routine,
169
00:08:51,847 --> 00:08:53,917
it would do more
to bring your memory back.
170
00:08:54,007 --> 00:08:57,124
I have it. Would you like
to help me feed the plants?
171
00:08:58,407 --> 00:09:01,479
- Yes, that sounds harmless enough.
- All right.
172
00:09:01,567 --> 00:09:04,081
- Mama, would you care to join us?
- No, I can't.
173
00:09:04,167 --> 00:09:06,123
I have to stay in the stock another hour.
174
00:09:06,207 --> 00:09:07,925
It's my beauty treatment.
175
00:09:11,087 --> 00:09:12,679
Better make that two hours.
176
00:09:18,007 --> 00:09:20,157
- Go ahead, darling, feed her.
- With hamburgers?
177
00:09:20,247 --> 00:09:22,158
What else? Go on.
178
00:09:28,087 --> 00:09:30,760
- That thing tried to eat me.
- Nonsense.
179
00:09:31,207 --> 00:09:33,084
Humans give her terrible heartburn.
180
00:09:35,007 --> 00:09:37,840
Show Father how much
you love him, Cleopatra.
181
00:09:40,647 --> 00:09:42,000
It's choking me.
182
00:09:42,087 --> 00:09:43,998
Nonsense. She's embracing you.
183
00:09:44,087 --> 00:09:46,806
You're trying to kill me!
To get that insurance money.
184
00:09:50,687 --> 00:09:52,166
Oh, Cleopatra.
185
00:09:52,527 --> 00:09:54,085
I know, darling.
186
00:09:54,527 --> 00:09:56,961
I know how it feels to be scorned.
187
00:10:03,247 --> 00:10:05,283
You must believe me, Gomez.
188
00:10:05,367 --> 00:10:08,359
I would no more harm you
than a vulture in its nest.
189
00:10:08,847 --> 00:10:10,838
Vultures! Are they circling already?
190
00:10:11,047 --> 00:10:12,799
Of course not, bubele.
191
00:10:13,767 --> 00:10:15,962
Don't call me that ridiculous name.
192
00:10:16,047 --> 00:10:17,560
It used to thrill you.
193
00:10:17,647 --> 00:10:20,559
It would turn you
into a fiery furnace of affection.
194
00:10:20,647 --> 00:10:21,796
Impossible.
195
00:10:22,647 --> 00:10:25,002
Let's recapture
those mad moments, Gomez.
196
00:10:25,447 --> 00:10:26,766
Kiss my arm.
197
00:10:27,407 --> 00:10:28,522
Your arm?
198
00:10:28,607 --> 00:10:30,279
Darling, I'm yours.
199
00:10:30,607 --> 00:10:32,677
From shoulder to knuckle.
200
00:10:33,047 --> 00:10:34,560
Isn't that rather unsanitary?
201
00:10:36,167 --> 00:10:38,397
I must awaken you, Gomez. And I will.
202
00:10:38,647 --> 00:10:40,683
Not in that absurd outfit.
203
00:10:40,887 --> 00:10:42,400
- Darling...
- No offense,
204
00:10:42,487 --> 00:10:45,081
but something must be done
about your clothes.
205
00:10:49,327 --> 00:10:51,966
- Just your type.
- Oh, no, Gomez, please.
206
00:10:52,047 --> 00:10:53,560
He's sicker than I thought.
207
00:10:53,647 --> 00:10:55,126
You don't like my presents?
208
00:10:55,207 --> 00:10:58,483
Oh, darling, of course.
I always love your presents.
209
00:10:58,607 --> 00:11:00,484
It's just that they're so...
210
00:11:01,927 --> 00:11:03,076
expensive.
211
00:11:03,167 --> 00:11:05,442
Well, certainly they're expensive.
212
00:11:05,527 --> 00:11:07,836
But it's worth it
to see my wife dressed properly.
213
00:11:12,247 --> 00:11:15,683
Son, why don't you go lie down
for a while? You're not well.
214
00:11:15,807 --> 00:11:17,957
Nonsense! Never felt better in my life.
215
00:11:18,047 --> 00:11:20,322
I shopped like mad. Beautiful, isn't it?
216
00:11:22,047 --> 00:11:24,117
I think I better go lie down.
217
00:11:24,807 --> 00:11:26,718
They're all so lovely.
218
00:11:26,807 --> 00:11:29,162
I don't know which to try on first.
219
00:11:29,687 --> 00:11:32,247
Well, perhaps I have overdone it a bit.
220
00:11:32,687 --> 00:11:36,521
Yes. I need time to absorb
your generosity and to think about it.
221
00:11:36,727 --> 00:11:39,878
Lurch, would you put these... things
upstairs in my room?
222
00:11:39,967 --> 00:11:41,685
I'll try them on later.
223
00:11:41,767 --> 00:11:43,997
Darling, why don't you relax?
224
00:11:44,087 --> 00:11:46,123
It's not very easy to relax around here.
225
00:11:46,207 --> 00:11:48,721
Well, of course it is. Stand on your head.
226
00:12:04,007 --> 00:12:07,716
He's even talking of chopping down
my beautiful African strangler.
227
00:12:07,807 --> 00:12:09,877
Kill Cleopatra?
228
00:12:09,967 --> 00:12:13,084
- That's murder!
- Father wouldn't do that.
229
00:12:13,487 --> 00:12:16,320
Your father's ill, dear.
He doesn't know what he's saying.
230
00:12:19,127 --> 00:12:20,765
I just don't know what to do.
231
00:12:20,847 --> 00:12:23,156
I'd hoped one of you
might have a suggestion.
232
00:12:23,807 --> 00:12:27,516
How about a little heat therapy?
That might snap him out of it.
233
00:12:27,847 --> 00:12:30,725
I could boil some oil and dip his head in it.
234
00:12:31,967 --> 00:12:34,561
No, no, you did that
for his migraine, remember?
235
00:12:35,047 --> 00:12:36,765
It just made him hotheaded.
236
00:12:41,447 --> 00:12:44,803
Yes, Thing. What is it?
Do you have an idea?
237
00:12:51,207 --> 00:12:55,644
Oh, no, no. I read about that, too,
but I couldn't do it, I just couldn't.
238
00:12:56,327 --> 00:12:57,396
Do what?
239
00:12:57,487 --> 00:13:00,206
It's here,
in Grandpa Squint's old medical book.
240
00:13:00,447 --> 00:13:01,641
I marked it.
241
00:13:02,727 --> 00:13:03,762
See?
242
00:13:03,847 --> 00:13:06,600
"When amnesia is caused by a blow
on the head,
243
00:13:06,687 --> 00:13:10,123
"it can sometimes be cured
by giving the victim a similar blow."
244
00:13:11,327 --> 00:13:13,363
But I could never do that to Gomez.
245
00:13:13,447 --> 00:13:16,120
We'll just have to wait
and hope that he comes to his senses
246
00:13:16,207 --> 00:13:18,675
before he destroys
our beautiful way of life.
247
00:13:18,767 --> 00:13:22,123
I never thought anyone
in this family'd go nutty.
248
00:13:22,207 --> 00:13:25,005
Well, maybe he'll be better
when we get back, honey.
249
00:13:25,367 --> 00:13:29,440
I'm taking the children to the movies
to see The Batwoman From Outer Space.
250
00:13:29,647 --> 00:13:33,435
- They love those true-life stories.
- Lovely, Mama.
251
00:13:33,927 --> 00:13:35,440
Children, you run along now.
252
00:13:35,527 --> 00:13:38,724
But take the back door
and don't disturb your dear father.
253
00:13:38,807 --> 00:13:41,196
- Oh, goody, goody.
- Oh, goody, goody.
254
00:13:55,247 --> 00:13:57,283
FESTER: Morticia can't do it, huh?
255
00:13:57,687 --> 00:14:00,645
If it'll make Gomez well, I can do it.
256
00:14:03,327 --> 00:14:06,319
I love that boy but I'll clobber him.
257
00:14:15,447 --> 00:14:17,165
Well, hello there, Fester.
258
00:14:17,487 --> 00:14:20,365
- Didn't hear you come in.
- I sneaked in.
259
00:14:20,447 --> 00:14:22,597
Must have dozed off. Fell out of the chair.
260
00:14:22,687 --> 00:14:25,326
- How do you feel?
- Fine. Never felt better in my life.
261
00:14:25,407 --> 00:14:27,841
You're looking mighty good today.
Handsome as usual.
262
00:14:28,567 --> 00:14:31,559
- Where's Morticia?
- I'll call her.
263
00:14:33,127 --> 00:14:35,402
Morticia! Morticia!
264
00:14:42,247 --> 00:14:45,125
Oh, Gomez, darling,
I was going to try on these dresses
265
00:14:45,207 --> 00:14:47,277
but I didn't know which one
you wanted to see first.
266
00:14:47,367 --> 00:14:49,483
Great jumping catfish!
267
00:14:49,567 --> 00:14:51,797
Where did you find those monstrosities?
268
00:14:51,887 --> 00:14:53,957
- Find them? But...
- Never mind where they came from.
269
00:14:54,047 --> 00:14:56,083
Put them back, cara mia. Please.
270
00:14:58,607 --> 00:15:02,805
Oh, yes, Gomez, darling, yes, I will.
271
00:15:02,887 --> 00:15:05,640
- I'm so happy.
- Querida m�a.
272
00:15:05,727 --> 00:15:08,116
- I'll be right back down.
- Cara.
273
00:15:34,607 --> 00:15:37,599
LURCH: It's for his own good.
274
00:16:11,007 --> 00:16:12,599
Gomez, darling.
275
00:16:14,327 --> 00:16:16,557
I thought I'd bring
these things all downstairs
276
00:16:16,647 --> 00:16:18,683
and then call a junkman
to come and get them.
277
00:16:18,767 --> 00:16:20,803
Junkman? For your new clothes?
278
00:16:20,887 --> 00:16:23,196
Well, since you've told me
to get rid of them, I thought...
279
00:16:23,287 --> 00:16:26,882
No, no, my dear.
I said get rid of that horrible black thing.
280
00:16:26,967 --> 00:16:31,006
- But, bubele?
- Not bubele.
281
00:16:32,567 --> 00:16:34,797
Very well, Mr. Addams.
282
00:16:35,647 --> 00:16:38,081
GOMEZ: I... Perhaps, I'm too strict
with you, my dear.
283
00:16:38,167 --> 00:16:40,078
After all, you are my wife.
284
00:16:40,167 --> 00:16:41,759
Yes, and it isn't easy.
285
00:16:41,847 --> 00:16:44,486
So you may call me "honey bun."
286
00:16:46,047 --> 00:16:47,560
Or "doll boy."
287
00:16:49,967 --> 00:16:53,926
MORTICIA: Doll boy. Oh, he is sick.
288
00:16:54,087 --> 00:16:57,045
Now run upstairs
and get rid of that black thing
289
00:16:57,127 --> 00:16:59,197
and put on some proper clothing.
290
00:16:59,527 --> 00:17:01,358
If this goes on much longer,
291
00:17:01,447 --> 00:17:04,200
the proper clothing for me
will be a straitjacket.
292
00:17:04,647 --> 00:17:05,921
Very well...
293
00:17:07,487 --> 00:17:08,806
doll boy.
294
00:17:12,567 --> 00:17:14,717
(WHISPERS) Doesn't seem a bit better,
does he?
295
00:17:15,487 --> 00:17:18,524
You children go play. I've got things to do.
296
00:17:38,567 --> 00:17:41,286
You mean hit my own father
with an Indian club?
297
00:17:41,367 --> 00:17:44,643
- It's for his own good.
- Then you do it.
298
00:17:44,847 --> 00:17:48,601
- He might get mad at me.
- He might get mad at me, too.
299
00:17:48,807 --> 00:17:52,800
But while Father is ill,
you're the head of the family.
300
00:17:54,247 --> 00:17:55,919
Hand me that club.
301
00:18:00,167 --> 00:18:04,399
Gomez darling, you don't know what
it means to me to have you well again.
302
00:18:04,487 --> 00:18:07,524
Well? I'm always well
when I'm with you, cara mia.
303
00:18:09,687 --> 00:18:11,598
Later, darling, later.
304
00:18:12,607 --> 00:18:15,360
Later. Right now, I'm starved.
305
00:18:16,207 --> 00:18:20,485
Anything your heart desires. How about
some of that nice baked iguana?
306
00:18:20,647 --> 00:18:24,686
Capital! An iguana sandwich
and a steaming cup of pinecone nectar.
307
00:18:25,087 --> 00:18:28,477
Darling, you go right over here
and you sit down
308
00:18:28,887 --> 00:18:31,879
and make yourself comfortable.
I want to fix it myself.
309
00:18:32,007 --> 00:18:33,201
Querida.
310
00:18:40,007 --> 00:18:42,521
There he is. In the chair.
311
00:18:42,807 --> 00:18:45,719
- What if he sees us?
- I'll take care of that.
312
00:18:48,607 --> 00:18:50,916
- Hello, Father.
- Hello there.
313
00:18:51,247 --> 00:18:54,000
- I have a surprise for you.
- Good, I love surprises.
314
00:18:54,087 --> 00:18:56,442
- Close your eyes.
- All right.
315
00:18:57,207 --> 00:19:00,085
- Keep them closed real tight.
- I will.
316
00:19:15,607 --> 00:19:20,283
I'm sorry it took so long, darling.
But I wanted everything to be just so.
317
00:19:20,647 --> 00:19:23,559
- Is there something wrong?
- I just had a dizzy spell or something.
318
00:19:23,647 --> 00:19:25,763
Well, this will fix you up.
319
00:19:26,687 --> 00:19:29,565
- What's that?
- Why, it's your lunch, darling.
320
00:19:29,727 --> 00:19:32,685
Baked iguana and pinecone nectar.
321
00:19:33,087 --> 00:19:36,762
Good heavens!
Of all the nauseating-Iooking concoctions.
322
00:19:38,087 --> 00:19:41,124
- Are you trying to poison me?
- Darling, don't even...
323
00:19:41,647 --> 00:19:43,877
Oh, no, you're sick again.
324
00:19:45,087 --> 00:19:46,645
Now what am I going to do?
325
00:19:46,727 --> 00:19:49,446
Well, for one thing,
you could bring me some decent food.
326
00:19:49,527 --> 00:19:53,315
A hot dog with chili on it,
a bottle of orange pop,
327
00:19:53,407 --> 00:19:55,921
and a slab of apple pie with cheese.
328
00:19:57,127 --> 00:19:58,526
Oh, Gomez!
329
00:20:02,527 --> 00:20:06,236
That's all it says, Uncle Fester.
"A blow on the head."
330
00:20:06,647 --> 00:20:08,603
You must have done it incorrectly.
331
00:20:08,687 --> 00:20:12,600
You know, I thought I did it real good.
He seemed well after I belted him.
332
00:20:13,367 --> 00:20:16,165
He was for a while, but it just didn't last.
333
00:20:20,367 --> 00:20:22,198
There's only one thing left to do.
334
00:20:22,287 --> 00:20:25,165
Oh, boy! Hit him again.
This time I'll belt him...
335
00:20:25,247 --> 00:20:29,286
No, Uncle Fester, this time I'll do it.
But I'll need your help.
336
00:20:29,407 --> 00:20:31,045
I'll hold him for you.
337
00:20:31,647 --> 00:20:35,242
I can't do it. I can't bear the look
on his face when I hit him.
338
00:20:35,727 --> 00:20:40,039
- Should I put a sack over his head?
- No. No, I have a much better idea.
339
00:20:40,207 --> 00:20:42,004
You know those long drapes
in the living room?
340
00:20:42,087 --> 00:20:43,076
Sure.
341
00:20:43,167 --> 00:20:45,362
You tell him that you're playing a game
with the children
342
00:20:45,447 --> 00:20:47,597
and then get him to hide
behind them out of sight.
343
00:20:47,687 --> 00:20:49,439
Oh, boy, this sounds like fun!
344
00:20:49,887 --> 00:20:52,162
That way I can give him
the club treatment
345
00:20:52,247 --> 00:20:54,602
without looking at his dear, sweet face.
346
00:21:06,367 --> 00:21:07,561
There he is.
347
00:21:08,927 --> 00:21:11,600
I'll get him behind the drapes,
then you conk him good.
348
00:21:11,687 --> 00:21:14,121
- I hope it works this time.
- So do I.
349
00:21:14,767 --> 00:21:16,917
His poor head must be getting lumpy.
350
00:21:17,607 --> 00:21:19,518
Yeah, but on him it looks good.
351
00:21:24,487 --> 00:21:27,160
Hi, Gomez. I've been looking
all over for you.
352
00:21:27,247 --> 00:21:29,636
The children and I
are gonna play hide-and-seek.
353
00:21:29,727 --> 00:21:31,922
- Would you care to join us?
- I'm busy.
354
00:21:32,167 --> 00:21:35,239
Come on, Gomez,
you need the relaxation.
355
00:21:35,487 --> 00:21:37,603
- All right, all right.
- Come on. Come on.
356
00:21:37,687 --> 00:21:38,881
- I'll play.
- Good.
357
00:21:38,967 --> 00:21:40,878
Now we'll hide over there
behind the drapes.
358
00:21:40,967 --> 00:21:42,446
They'll never find us.
359
00:21:42,527 --> 00:21:46,918
Come on, now, you take this side.
Over here, like that. And I'll get in here.
360
00:21:48,287 --> 00:21:50,517
- Are you ready, Gomez?
- GOMEZ: Ready.
361
00:21:50,647 --> 00:21:52,000
FESTER: We're ready!
362
00:22:03,367 --> 00:22:05,323
Darling, forgive me.
363
00:22:05,567 --> 00:22:09,196
- What in the world did you do to Fester?
- Gomez! I thought it was you!
364
00:22:09,807 --> 00:22:11,445
Me? You thought...
365
00:22:11,527 --> 00:22:13,802
I was right. You are trying to kill me.
366
00:22:13,887 --> 00:22:16,037
No, darling,
I'm only trying to make you well.
367
00:22:16,127 --> 00:22:17,845
- With a club?
- Yes!
368
00:22:17,927 --> 00:22:19,997
- You want that insurance money.
- No!
369
00:22:26,127 --> 00:22:28,516
You won't get me! I'm getting out of here!
370
00:22:42,167 --> 00:22:45,716
My poor, battered, wounded love.
Speak to me.
371
00:22:46,247 --> 00:22:47,726
Ah, querida.
372
00:22:47,887 --> 00:22:51,562
Darling, you're well at last.
373
00:22:51,727 --> 00:22:52,842
Bubele.
374
00:23:11,767 --> 00:23:13,280
A little harder, Thing.
375
00:23:14,287 --> 00:23:15,436
That's it.
376
00:23:15,767 --> 00:23:18,725
Nothing takes the knots
off a man's head like sandpaper.
377
00:23:18,967 --> 00:23:21,686
Dear Thing. He has such a gentle touch.
378
00:23:22,087 --> 00:23:24,920
That fire smells good.
What are we burning?
379
00:23:25,207 --> 00:23:26,925
Your Indian clubs.
380
00:23:28,967 --> 00:23:32,880
If I did half the things you said I did,
I must have been a sick, sick man.
381
00:23:33,567 --> 00:23:36,240
Thanks to you, cara mia, I'm all well now.
382
00:23:37,167 --> 00:23:39,601
You really should thank Uncle Fester, dear.
383
00:23:40,407 --> 00:23:41,522
Thank you, Fester.
384
00:23:45,447 --> 00:23:46,846
Who's Fester?
385
00:23:48,727 --> 00:23:49,921
Oh, no.
29054
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.