All language subtitles for The Great North s03e09 Bees All That Adventure.eng

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt-PT Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish Download
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,485 --> 00:00:04,670 -♪ Look up there ♪ -♪ What do you see? ♪ 2 00:00:04,903 --> 00:00:06,160 ♪ Nature and stuff ♪ 3 00:00:06,161 --> 00:00:07,743 -♪ Like a rock ♪ -♪ And a tree ♪ 4 00:00:07,744 --> 00:00:10,261 ♪ Oh, the Great North ♪ 5 00:00:10,359 --> 00:00:13,919 ♪ Way up here, you can breathe the air ♪ 6 00:00:13,920 --> 00:00:15,188 ♪ Catch some fish ♪ 7 00:00:15,189 --> 00:00:16,706 ♪ Or gaze at a bear ♪ 8 00:00:16,859 --> 00:00:17,909 ♪ Wow ♪ 9 00:00:18,106 --> 00:00:21,215 ♪ Oh, the Great North ♪ 10 00:00:21,447 --> 00:00:22,947 ♪ Here we live, oh, oh ♪ 11 00:00:22,948 --> 00:00:24,454 ♪ Here we'll stay, oh, whoo ♪ 12 00:00:24,455 --> 00:00:26,050 ♪ From longest night to longest day ♪ 13 00:00:26,051 --> 00:00:30,029 ♪ In the Great North. ♪ 14 00:00:31,733 --> 00:00:33,501 (cheering) 15 00:00:34,926 --> 00:00:37,818 Oh, my God. The vibe in the cafeteria today 16 00:00:37,842 --> 00:00:39,158 is electric. 17 00:00:39,179 --> 00:00:42,164 I can't believe the lower 48 exchange student 18 00:00:42,165 --> 00:00:43,783 from our sister city of Long Grove, Illinois 19 00:00:43,784 --> 00:00:44,834 arrives next week. 20 00:00:44,835 --> 00:00:46,364 Oh, right. You know, as someone 21 00:00:46,365 --> 00:00:48,186 who until this year was homeschooled, 22 00:00:48,187 --> 00:00:50,354 I cannot wait to taste that fresh meat. 23 00:00:50,355 --> 00:00:51,954 Sorry, I know not to call her fresh meat, 24 00:00:51,955 --> 00:00:53,288 but it's just fun to say. 25 00:00:53,351 --> 00:00:55,161 -Fresh meat. -And Long Grove is just 26 00:00:55,162 --> 00:00:57,059 an hour outside of Chicago, so that meat 27 00:00:57,060 --> 00:00:58,731 is gonna be bringing the sophistication 28 00:00:58,732 --> 00:00:59,972 in her meat pockets. 29 00:00:59,973 --> 00:01:01,907 Sorry, I know I should also not say that. 30 00:01:01,908 --> 00:01:03,653 Remember how last year's student-slash-meat had 31 00:01:03,654 --> 00:01:06,397 a fake ID and just casually brought red wine 32 00:01:06,420 --> 00:01:08,830 to the Bon Voyage Bonfire at the end of the week? 33 00:01:08,910 --> 00:01:11,744 It was so cool and also got a lot of people suspended. 34 00:01:11,745 --> 00:01:13,972 It's so rad that my family won the lottery to host. 35 00:01:13,973 --> 00:01:15,198 I know! 36 00:01:15,199 --> 00:01:17,857 Can you imagine rolling into the Bon Voyage Bonfire 37 00:01:17,858 --> 00:01:20,381 with this incredible, big city sophisticate on our arms 38 00:01:20,382 --> 00:01:23,038 after spending a week becoming her closest friends? 39 00:01:23,039 --> 00:01:24,710 I don't want to get ahead of ourselves, 40 00:01:24,711 --> 00:01:26,306 but it might make us cool forever 41 00:01:26,307 --> 00:01:28,624 and finally get Stacy B. to leave us alone. 42 00:01:28,625 --> 00:01:30,409 Look at my former best friend over there 43 00:01:30,410 --> 00:01:33,245 with all her- pfft- already popular friends. 44 00:01:33,401 --> 00:01:34,659 I bet she's furious that 45 00:01:34,660 --> 00:01:36,259 the exchange student will be in our group. 46 00:01:36,260 --> 00:01:37,762 She'll have to stop calling us the... 47 00:01:37,763 --> 00:01:39,267 -The Three Muska-weirds! -(others gasp) 48 00:01:39,268 --> 00:01:40,661 What are you guys even doing? 49 00:01:40,662 --> 00:01:41,941 Probably something super weird. 50 00:01:41,942 --> 00:01:43,516 Eating a bowl of finger nails? 51 00:01:43,517 --> 00:01:45,341 That's what I heard from when I told everyone that. 52 00:01:45,342 --> 00:01:46,842 Ugh, you know what we're doing. 53 00:01:46,843 --> 00:01:48,517 We're eating lunch, which isn't weird. 54 00:01:48,518 --> 00:01:51,109 Yeah, everybody does it, except maybe those who... 55 00:01:51,110 --> 00:01:52,302 had, like, a large breakfast. 56 00:01:52,303 --> 00:01:53,933 But most people, they eat lunch. 57 00:01:53,956 --> 00:01:56,791 -Thanks for the lecture, Dr. Lunch. -You're welcome. 58 00:01:56,792 --> 00:01:58,652 Uh, no, actually not. You don't get to give me 59 00:01:58,653 --> 00:02:00,044 another stupid nickname, 60 00:02:00,045 --> 00:02:02,404 and also stop calling us "The Three Muska-weirds." 61 00:02:02,405 --> 00:02:04,150 I bet you haven't even read the book 62 00:02:04,151 --> 00:02:05,245 that you're basing that insult on. 63 00:02:05,246 --> 00:02:06,996 What are you talking about, Judy? 64 00:02:07,010 --> 00:02:08,918 I based it on a candy bar. Bye... 65 00:02:09,015 --> 00:02:10,330 Ugh, she's so mean. 66 00:02:10,331 --> 00:02:12,080 But pretty soon there will be four of us, 67 00:02:12,081 --> 00:02:14,028 and she can't call us The Four Muska-weirds. 68 00:02:14,029 --> 00:02:15,770 She absolutely can call us that. 69 00:02:15,925 --> 00:02:17,775 But overall things are looking up. 70 00:02:17,930 --> 00:02:19,279 HAM: Did you get "A" 71 00:02:19,435 --> 00:02:20,485 for number four? 72 00:02:20,529 --> 00:02:22,863 Uh, because I'm also feeling "B" and "C." 73 00:02:22,886 --> 00:02:27,037 -And honestly, "D" has a little something going for her. -It's "C." 74 00:02:27,064 --> 00:02:29,956 And that's why you have the highest GPA in our grade 75 00:02:29,980 --> 00:02:32,450 and get to go to Illinois on the exchange program. 76 00:02:32,451 --> 00:02:33,823 -Are you jazzed? -Of course. 77 00:02:33,824 --> 00:02:35,493 Who doesn't want to see Long Grove, 78 00:02:35,494 --> 00:02:36,902 home of the longest grove? 79 00:02:36,999 --> 00:02:38,090 Oop, before I forget. 80 00:02:38,091 --> 00:02:39,337 I wanted to leave you with something 81 00:02:39,338 --> 00:02:40,934 to remember me by while I'm gone, 82 00:02:40,935 --> 00:02:42,420 so I found this handsome little devil 83 00:02:42,421 --> 00:02:44,518 at the garden center, and I was wondering 84 00:02:44,519 --> 00:02:46,841 if you'd like to cactus-sit him while I'm gone. 85 00:02:46,842 --> 00:02:50,453 Oh. He is... so cute and sharp. 86 00:02:50,610 --> 00:02:53,019 I named him Robert. Robert Plant-inson. 87 00:02:53,117 --> 00:02:55,543 You know I am very slightly afraid of cactuses, 88 00:02:55,700 --> 00:02:57,641 but this one is so small, 89 00:02:57,872 --> 00:03:00,482 and I have always thought about having kids, 90 00:03:00,605 --> 00:03:03,435 so cactus-sitting sounds like an easy way to practice, 91 00:03:03,479 --> 00:03:05,980 especially if I have a baby with thorns one day. 92 00:03:06,078 --> 00:03:09,153 Now, what are we thinking on this next one? "A," maybe "C"? 93 00:03:09,253 --> 00:03:10,736 -It's "B." -I knew it! 94 00:03:10,737 --> 00:03:13,355 Thanks again for letting us sleep over all week, Esther. 95 00:03:13,356 --> 00:03:14,507 Of course, girls, we've already got 96 00:03:14,508 --> 00:03:16,250 -Kima's cousin here. -Nasty. 97 00:03:16,251 --> 00:03:18,093 Uh, you mispronounced "extremely cool." 98 00:03:18,094 --> 00:03:20,370 Uh, you mispronounced "My name is Dane, 99 00:03:20,371 --> 00:03:22,789 "and my farts smells like gasoline-soaked Cheetos 100 00:03:22,790 --> 00:03:24,276 "that someone ate and then threw up 101 00:03:24,277 --> 00:03:25,462 "and then someone ate that barf 102 00:03:25,463 --> 00:03:27,059 and then farted again after that." 103 00:03:27,060 --> 00:03:28,560 Kima, stop. Although, Dane, 104 00:03:28,561 --> 00:03:30,643 -your farts really are a mess. -Thank you, Uncle Walt. 105 00:03:30,644 --> 00:03:32,465 So, you dweebs are staying here all week 106 00:03:32,466 --> 00:03:34,227 just to hang out with someone from- 107 00:03:34,228 --> 00:03:35,618 checks notes- Illi-nerd? 108 00:03:35,733 --> 00:03:38,400 (laughs) Why do I hate it when Stacy makes fun of me, 109 00:03:38,401 --> 00:03:40,262 but I love it when Dane makes fun of me? 110 00:03:40,263 --> 00:03:42,338 Because I'm like the guys from Jackass, 111 00:03:42,494 --> 00:03:44,085 a little wild but a lot lovable. 112 00:03:44,181 --> 00:03:45,513 Judy, no, Dane's gross. 113 00:03:45,514 --> 00:03:47,615 And he has a tattoo of Garfield saying "no worries" 114 00:03:47,616 --> 00:03:49,431 -on his calf. -Roasted. 115 00:03:49,432 --> 00:03:51,441 You know who else is getting roasted pretty bad? 116 00:03:51,442 --> 00:03:53,275 Only in not such a fun way? 117 00:03:53,298 --> 00:03:54,522 BOTH: Mother Earth. 118 00:03:54,542 --> 00:03:55,708 Dad, we all get it. 119 00:03:55,709 --> 00:03:57,049 You're a climate scientist, 120 00:03:57,050 --> 00:03:58,795 but also you're preaching to the choir. 121 00:03:58,796 --> 00:04:00,542 We're the ones that are gonna get broiled alive. 122 00:04:00,543 --> 00:04:01,876 It's a bummer. 123 00:04:01,896 --> 00:04:02,970 Oh, sorry. 124 00:04:02,971 --> 00:04:04,568 Is it a bummer that at this pace, 125 00:04:04,569 --> 00:04:06,500 your mother and the other Alaskan smoke jumpers up here 126 00:04:06,501 --> 00:04:08,505 are gonna be fighting wildfires year-round? 127 00:04:08,506 --> 00:04:10,436 Is it a bummer that whole pods of seals 128 00:04:10,437 --> 00:04:11,906 are dying because the sea ice 129 00:04:11,907 --> 00:04:13,242 off Biorka Island is thinner than a... 130 00:04:13,243 --> 00:04:14,667 -Walt, cool it. -Fine. 131 00:04:14,668 --> 00:04:16,601 But you know what's cooling way too fast? 132 00:04:16,602 --> 00:04:18,106 -Oh, my God. -Stop. -Let us eat, Walt. 133 00:04:18,107 --> 00:04:19,440 So guys, for real, 134 00:04:19,441 --> 00:04:20,705 what do we know about the Illi-nerd? 135 00:04:20,706 --> 00:04:21,871 Esther! All we know is 136 00:04:21,872 --> 00:04:23,695 that she's probably very sophisticated 137 00:04:23,696 --> 00:04:25,366 and her shine will get all over us, 138 00:04:25,367 --> 00:04:27,873 and Stacy B. will stop calling us The Three Musk-a-weirds. 139 00:04:27,874 --> 00:04:29,730 What is Stacy B.'s problem with you three, anyway? 140 00:04:29,731 --> 00:04:32,139 It's not Stacy B.'s problem with us three, 141 00:04:32,295 --> 00:04:33,811 it's really just... me. 142 00:04:33,812 --> 00:04:36,138 See, all through childhood, me and Stacy B. were best friends. 143 00:04:36,139 --> 00:04:38,081 We even had matching BFF toe rings. 144 00:04:38,236 --> 00:04:40,569 But then, as we got older, things changed, 145 00:04:40,593 --> 00:04:42,909 and it all came to a head one day at school. 146 00:04:42,910 --> 00:04:44,920 She had already disinvited me from her birthday party, 147 00:04:44,921 --> 00:04:46,758 which was weird because it was happening at my house. 148 00:04:46,759 --> 00:04:49,685 But then I made the fatal error of coming to school 149 00:04:49,686 --> 00:04:51,437 in a very fun airbrushed T-shirt 150 00:04:51,438 --> 00:04:53,795 where the "U" in my name was replaced by a rainbow. 151 00:04:53,796 --> 00:04:58,023 And out of nowhere, Stacy B. turned to me and said... 152 00:04:58,048 --> 00:04:59,188 Are you wearing a shirt 153 00:04:59,369 --> 00:05:00,585 with your own name on it 154 00:05:00,586 --> 00:05:02,376 where the "U" is replaced by a rainbow? 155 00:05:02,377 --> 00:05:03,634 (laughter) 156 00:05:03,635 --> 00:05:05,384 AMELIA: Oof. If there's one thing I've learned 157 00:05:05,385 --> 00:05:06,585 from C.J. on The West Wing, 158 00:05:06,586 --> 00:05:08,743 it's that a well-timed rhetorical question 159 00:05:08,744 --> 00:05:10,319 can cut very deep. 160 00:05:10,398 --> 00:05:13,566 All she did was point out a fact, but a line was drawn. 161 00:05:13,665 --> 00:05:16,075 Stacy left me behind, and I never understood it. 162 00:05:16,081 --> 00:05:19,173 And I couldn't even bring myself to take my BFF toe ring off, 163 00:05:19,198 --> 00:05:21,773 and it really hurts, because it got very tight. 164 00:05:21,774 --> 00:05:23,207 And also, it hurts emotionally 165 00:05:23,208 --> 00:05:24,953 because she didn't want to be my friend anymore. 166 00:05:24,954 --> 00:05:26,107 Both things are unpleasant! 167 00:05:26,108 --> 00:05:27,702 Well, when Chicago Jill gets here, 168 00:05:27,703 --> 00:05:29,784 she's gonna take us from The Three Muska-weirds 169 00:05:29,785 --> 00:05:32,795 to the four muska-cool-girls you respect too much to bully. 170 00:05:32,796 --> 00:05:35,298 Just like Dane's calf-Garfield says: "No worries." 171 00:05:35,299 --> 00:05:36,649 -(grunts) -Ah. Ah. 172 00:05:36,804 --> 00:05:38,987 GIBBONS: Attention, let's kick off 173 00:05:39,144 --> 00:05:40,894 this full week of out-of-town fun 174 00:05:40,906 --> 00:05:44,574 from today Meet-Ya-Monday to Friday's Bon Voyage Bonfire. 175 00:05:44,600 --> 00:05:47,267 It's my honor to present Lone Moose's annual 176 00:05:47,499 --> 00:05:49,590 "Lower 48 Exchange Student." 177 00:05:49,614 --> 00:05:51,839 And now, without further ado... 178 00:05:51,861 --> 00:05:53,344 This is further ado. 179 00:05:53,365 --> 00:05:56,124 What you're doing right now is textbook further ado. 180 00:05:56,281 --> 00:05:59,874 -Oh, well, ado apologize. -Mm-mm. Yuck. 181 00:05:59,976 --> 00:06:03,143 Well, I liked it. Anyway, here's Jill Gerbert-Erble. 182 00:06:03,300 --> 00:06:07,302 Oh, man. Here she comes in her leather jacket and heels. 183 00:06:07,403 --> 00:06:09,144 Uh... Jill? Huh. 184 00:06:09,145 --> 00:06:10,745 She told me she wanted to make a big entran- 185 00:06:10,746 --> 00:06:12,233 -(upbeat music plays) -Oh, here we go. 186 00:06:12,234 --> 00:06:13,491 (imitates fanfare) 187 00:06:13,661 --> 00:06:16,680 Rub your antennas together for the Queen Bee! 188 00:06:16,681 --> 00:06:19,084 Thank you, sir, however, I am not, nor will I ever be, 189 00:06:19,085 --> 00:06:20,513 comfortable sharing the stage. 190 00:06:20,514 --> 00:06:21,679 Please step back. 191 00:06:21,701 --> 00:06:23,759 Now, who's ready to take a Jill Pill? 192 00:06:23,781 --> 00:06:27,099 Side effects include: diah-respect for bees. 193 00:06:27,198 --> 00:06:28,248 Oh, no. 194 00:06:28,249 --> 00:06:29,537 You're probably wondering 195 00:06:29,538 --> 00:06:30,950 what my life is like back home, 196 00:06:30,951 --> 00:06:32,621 on the Gerbert-Erble Family Bee Farm. 197 00:06:32,622 --> 00:06:34,472 So let me tell you: amazing. 198 00:06:34,627 --> 00:06:36,294 Um, what is happening? 199 00:06:36,295 --> 00:06:38,895 The Gerbert-Erble Family Bee Farm is located 45 minutes 200 00:06:38,896 --> 00:06:40,154 outside of Long Grove, 201 00:06:40,155 --> 00:06:42,314 in an unincorporated hamlet called Beesville. 202 00:06:42,315 --> 00:06:44,486 My school is in Long Grove, my online school. 203 00:06:44,487 --> 00:06:45,927 I go twice a year to take exams. 204 00:06:45,992 --> 00:06:47,992 Have you ever even been to Chicago? 205 00:06:47,993 --> 00:06:50,185 (scoffs) Why? So I can get trampled to death 206 00:06:50,186 --> 00:06:52,600 by all the improv actors sprinting to get in line 207 00:06:52,601 --> 00:06:54,196 for deep dish pizzas? No, thank you. 208 00:06:54,197 --> 00:06:56,461 Of course, this absolute bizarro is staying 209 00:06:56,462 --> 00:06:57,902 with The Three Muska-weirds. 210 00:06:57,903 --> 00:06:59,377 I bet they're gonna spend the whole week 211 00:06:59,378 --> 00:07:00,547 holding hands on the toilet. 212 00:07:00,548 --> 00:07:01,622 (laughs) Freaks. 213 00:07:01,718 --> 00:07:03,959 It's like my rainbow T-shirt came to life 214 00:07:03,983 --> 00:07:05,858 and lives on a bee farm. 215 00:07:07,351 --> 00:07:11,911 So, you guys are staying here all week just to be with moi? 216 00:07:11,912 --> 00:07:13,399 It's like a little hive and I'm the queen. 217 00:07:13,400 --> 00:07:14,826 Oh, okay, so, the bee thing is like... 218 00:07:14,827 --> 00:07:16,573 this is, like, your whole personality? 219 00:07:16,574 --> 00:07:18,504 -Cool. -Now, Mrs. Esther and Mr. Walter, 220 00:07:18,505 --> 00:07:20,192 where do you keep your honey carafe? 221 00:07:20,193 --> 00:07:22,918 -Oh, for... what? -(laughs): Okay, Walt. 222 00:07:23,092 --> 00:07:25,382 Like we were gonna have tacos without honey? 223 00:07:25,448 --> 00:07:26,764 -You big clown. -What? 224 00:07:26,786 --> 00:07:29,695 Dad, Jill, um, loves honey and bees, 225 00:07:29,696 --> 00:07:31,798 and actually has a super interesting life 226 00:07:31,799 --> 00:07:34,132 back on her family's bee farm, so... 227 00:07:34,290 --> 00:07:35,547 Wait a second. A farm? 228 00:07:35,548 --> 00:07:38,132 Not Chicago? I thought you were a big-city big shot? 229 00:07:38,133 --> 00:07:39,574 I am something of a big shot. 230 00:07:39,729 --> 00:07:41,239 Not to buzz my own hind wings, 231 00:07:41,240 --> 00:07:43,981 but I'm, uh, in charge of a whole section of the apiary. 232 00:07:43,982 --> 00:07:46,907 Ooh. Oh, no. Mrs. Esther, where is the nearest toilet? 233 00:07:46,908 --> 00:07:48,418 Just down that hallway on the left. 234 00:07:48,419 --> 00:07:50,015 Please do not wait for me to eat the tacos. 235 00:07:50,016 --> 00:07:52,591 The TSA seized my water bottle full of honey, 236 00:07:52,614 --> 00:07:54,096 and, without my daily dose, 237 00:07:54,193 --> 00:07:56,603 oof, my bowels have been thrown for quite a loop. 238 00:07:56,683 --> 00:07:58,517 Okay, go ahead. You can say it. 239 00:07:58,538 --> 00:08:00,855 We're The Four Muska-weirds now. This blows. 240 00:08:00,856 --> 00:08:02,791 Come on, Judy, she's definitely odd, 241 00:08:02,792 --> 00:08:04,550 but she's only here five days. 242 00:08:04,551 --> 00:08:06,208 And we shouldn't make her feel weird. 243 00:08:06,209 --> 00:08:07,769 Yeah, maybe we'll turn her cool. 244 00:08:07,897 --> 00:08:09,730 -You guys? -Dane, I will ground you. 245 00:08:09,886 --> 00:08:11,052 I'm in college. 246 00:08:11,053 --> 00:08:13,169 I mean, she certainly can't get less normal, 247 00:08:13,170 --> 00:08:14,410 so I don't see a downside. 248 00:08:14,411 --> 00:08:15,992 JILL: False alarm, that was actually 249 00:08:15,993 --> 00:08:18,178 just a very significant gas event. 250 00:08:18,179 --> 00:08:20,079 The candle you had lit in there blew right out, ma'am. 251 00:08:20,080 --> 00:08:23,415 (laughs) Now, where are we on that honey carafe? 252 00:08:23,416 --> 00:08:26,538 All right, Robert. I'm just gonna get my homework done, 253 00:08:26,539 --> 00:08:28,614 and you... do that. 254 00:08:28,770 --> 00:08:30,045 Ouch! Ow! 255 00:08:30,275 --> 00:08:34,869 Okay. Just gonna drape this over you carefully and- Ow! 256 00:08:34,870 --> 00:08:36,716 Okay, now you're being unreasonable. 257 00:08:36,717 --> 00:08:37,794 That's enough, young man. 258 00:08:37,795 --> 00:08:38,888 All right, while I have dinner, 259 00:08:38,889 --> 00:08:40,814 you sit in your little book jail 260 00:08:40,912 --> 00:08:43,538 and think about what you've done, Robert. 261 00:08:45,499 --> 00:08:47,866 (snoring) 262 00:08:48,022 --> 00:08:49,322 (gasps) 263 00:08:49,323 --> 00:08:51,440 -Were you watching me sleep? -(singsongy): Only since dawn. 264 00:08:51,441 --> 00:08:54,108 I sleep bee hours, 11:00 p.m. to 4:00 a.m. 265 00:08:54,264 --> 00:08:56,854 Are you ready for a wacky Waco weekend girls' trip? 266 00:08:56,855 --> 00:08:58,200 I read that in my in-flight magazine. 267 00:08:58,201 --> 00:08:59,581 I have no idea what it means, 268 00:08:59,582 --> 00:09:01,041 but I really enjoyed saying it. 269 00:09:01,042 --> 00:09:02,895 Anyway, what do we have planned for after school? 270 00:09:02,896 --> 00:09:05,486 Anything is fine with me, such as and for instance, 271 00:09:05,628 --> 00:09:07,678 there is a very exciting indoor bee farm 272 00:09:07,801 --> 00:09:09,300 in Fairbanks I'd love to see. 273 00:09:09,301 --> 00:09:12,070 It's only a nine-hour drive, but I get sick if the car goes 274 00:09:12,071 --> 00:09:14,404 over 30 miles an hour, so it will take us 18. 275 00:09:14,405 --> 00:09:16,582 Or what if instead we take you to the mall 276 00:09:16,583 --> 00:09:20,085 for new clothes and new hair, and just, like... 277 00:09:20,086 --> 00:09:22,190 -change everything about you. -Oh. -Judy! 278 00:09:22,191 --> 00:09:24,416 (groans) What Judy is trying to say is, uh, 279 00:09:24,417 --> 00:09:26,535 on Friday, there's this event at school, 280 00:09:26,536 --> 00:09:28,035 the Bon Voyage Bonfire, 281 00:09:28,036 --> 00:09:29,935 and there's this fun tradition where you toss things 282 00:09:29,936 --> 00:09:31,565 in the fire you want to let go of, 283 00:09:31,566 --> 00:09:34,130 and maybe you'd like to get a new outfit for it or something. 284 00:09:34,131 --> 00:09:37,449 Wait, are you offering me a human teen makeover? 285 00:09:37,450 --> 00:09:39,236 Offering, suggesting, demanding, 286 00:09:39,237 --> 00:09:40,628 whatever you want to call it. 287 00:09:40,800 --> 00:09:43,075 -We're offering. -And if you happen to say... 288 00:09:43,076 --> 00:09:44,734 turn heads at school, and people wonder, 289 00:09:44,735 --> 00:09:46,163 "Wait, who is that exchange student, 290 00:09:46,164 --> 00:09:47,667 and look at her normal and not weird friends!" 291 00:09:47,668 --> 00:09:50,428 Well, pfft, I don't know, that would be neat. 292 00:09:50,584 --> 00:09:51,750 Oh, my God! I accept! 293 00:09:51,846 --> 00:09:53,512 It'll "bee" my greatest honor. 294 00:09:53,513 --> 00:09:56,115 -You know, like a bee. -Yeah. we got it! We get it. We-we got it. 295 00:09:56,116 --> 00:09:57,861 All right, after school, we'll have 296 00:09:57,862 --> 00:10:00,179 a Lone Moose Makeover Extravaganza. 297 00:10:00,352 --> 00:10:04,204 ♪ You should be your, you should be yourself ♪ 298 00:10:04,363 --> 00:10:06,363 ♪ Unless you're acting like a bee ♪ 299 00:10:06,364 --> 00:10:08,908 ♪ Then you should definitely be somebody else ♪ 300 00:10:08,909 --> 00:10:11,381 Did you know there's a hairstyle named after beehives? 301 00:10:11,382 --> 00:10:14,307 -Jill, no. -♪ Ooh, be yourself ♪ 302 00:10:14,332 --> 00:10:16,815 ♪ Unless other people don't like it ♪ 303 00:10:16,839 --> 00:10:19,840 ♪ Ooh, be yourself. ♪ 304 00:10:19,997 --> 00:10:21,739 Okay, two words: the dump. 305 00:10:21,760 --> 00:10:23,243 Yes. (giggles) The dump. 306 00:10:23,244 --> 00:10:24,859 Have I told you they've reinstated 307 00:10:24,860 --> 00:10:26,180 their early evening hours? 308 00:10:26,181 --> 00:10:27,531 Yes, Dad. Many times. 309 00:10:27,532 --> 00:10:30,283 They haven't had evening hours since I worked there in my 20s. 310 00:10:30,284 --> 00:10:32,525 I did our trash run a whole two days early. 311 00:10:32,549 --> 00:10:34,549 -Your turn, Ham. -Oh, uh, sorry, one sec. 312 00:10:34,550 --> 00:10:36,559 I'm texting Crispin. "How's Robert?" 313 00:10:36,560 --> 00:10:38,451 Who's Robert? You know I like to meet 314 00:10:38,452 --> 00:10:40,795 all your new friends, so I can also befriend them. 315 00:10:40,796 --> 00:10:42,812 Oh, crap, I forgot I'm cactus-sitting. 316 00:10:42,909 --> 00:10:45,319 Skip my turn, I'm gonna go snap a pic for Crispin. 317 00:10:45,475 --> 00:10:46,975 I'm up. All right, babe. 318 00:10:46,995 --> 00:10:49,070 Movie marriage mind meld, here we go. 319 00:10:49,071 --> 00:10:52,343 -Okay, you're eating, a-and it's family style. -Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 320 00:10:52,344 --> 00:10:54,454 -Family is very important to you. -Mm-hmm. 321 00:10:54,455 --> 00:10:55,760 In fact, your car robbing group is 322 00:10:55,761 --> 00:10:57,448 -an awful lot like a family. -Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 323 00:10:57,449 --> 00:10:59,282 -Fast and Furious 7! -Woo-hoo! 324 00:11:00,516 --> 00:11:02,416 Robert? 325 00:11:04,117 --> 00:11:05,525 Robert! 326 00:11:05,526 --> 00:11:08,311 -Dad, did you really go to the dump already? -Why, yes. 327 00:11:08,312 --> 00:11:10,722 They reinstated their early evening hours, so... 328 00:11:10,726 --> 00:11:11,818 How could you?! 329 00:11:11,971 --> 00:11:13,637 Hey, bud. Calm down. What's up? 330 00:11:13,734 --> 00:11:14,975 Oh, I don't know, 331 00:11:14,976 --> 00:11:16,391 my own dad dropped my boyfriend's cactus 332 00:11:16,392 --> 00:11:18,682 that I promised I'd keep an eye on at the dump, 333 00:11:18,899 --> 00:11:20,219 and now it's lost forever! 334 00:11:20,253 --> 00:11:23,179 -How could you do this, Father?! -Ham, don't panic. 335 00:11:23,353 --> 00:11:25,643 The dump's closed for the next couple of days. 336 00:11:25,644 --> 00:11:27,605 Paulie's taking Wednesday and Thursday off 337 00:11:27,606 --> 00:11:30,866 to work on his novel: Jeremy Can, Garbage Detective. 338 00:11:30,867 --> 00:11:33,605 But we can go on Friday and ask to have our trash back. 339 00:11:33,606 --> 00:11:36,290 And in the meantime, maybe send Crispin an emoji. 340 00:11:36,388 --> 00:11:37,588 I think teens love those. 341 00:11:37,708 --> 00:11:39,875 Ooh, try shrimp or the eggplant. 342 00:11:39,898 --> 00:11:41,230 No, Dad, the eggplant is... 343 00:11:41,385 --> 00:11:43,855 Actually, you know what, I will send him that one. 344 00:11:44,819 --> 00:11:46,244 Hello, everyone. 345 00:11:46,398 --> 00:11:49,824 Read us and weep. It's us, The Oresome Foursome. 346 00:11:49,825 --> 00:11:52,339 That's like "awesome" but better, and it rhymes, so... 347 00:11:52,340 --> 00:11:55,174 It does rhyme, but I don't like it. 348 00:11:55,331 --> 00:11:58,107 Hello, Quay, a cool boy in our grade. 349 00:11:58,264 --> 00:12:00,782 Oh, hey, Judy. Kima. Amelia. Bee girl. 350 00:12:01,014 --> 00:12:03,347 Uh, okay, take another look. Not a bee girl. 351 00:12:03,370 --> 00:12:05,111 She's just a regular, human girl 352 00:12:05,208 --> 00:12:07,859 who is friends with us. Oh, hi, Stacy. 353 00:12:07,860 --> 00:12:10,053 -I didn't even see you there. -Oh, hey, Judy. 354 00:12:10,054 --> 00:12:11,462 Hey, Jill. You look nice. 355 00:12:11,484 --> 00:12:12,924 Yeah, that's right, she does. 356 00:12:13,046 --> 00:12:16,063 You might even say she looks, uh, Muska-fierce. 357 00:12:16,238 --> 00:12:17,571 Mm-mm. No. Don't say that. 358 00:12:17,725 --> 00:12:19,483 Uh, excuse us! Excuse us! 359 00:12:19,505 --> 00:12:22,914 (laughs) Lower 48 cool girl and her besties coming through. 360 00:12:23,015 --> 00:12:24,589 -Choo choo. -Or her best bees. 361 00:12:24,744 --> 00:12:25,852 Jill, no. No, no. 362 00:12:26,082 --> 00:12:29,275 And to think, I knew them when they were weird. 363 00:12:30,922 --> 00:12:35,773 ♪ You should be your, you should be yourself ♪ 364 00:12:35,774 --> 00:12:37,628 ♪ Unless you're acting like a bee ♪ 365 00:12:37,629 --> 00:12:40,947 ♪ Then you should definitely be somebody else. ♪ 366 00:12:40,971 --> 00:12:43,713 See you later, Jude, and all Jude's dudes. 367 00:12:43,714 --> 00:12:45,724 I cannot believe the week we're having. 368 00:12:45,725 --> 00:12:47,564 Stacy B. hasn't called me a muska-weird even once 369 00:12:47,565 --> 00:12:49,990 since Jill's makeover, and our lunch table is 370 00:12:50,147 --> 00:12:51,479 absolutely popping off. 371 00:12:51,480 --> 00:12:53,170 Do you guys think we should sell tickets? 372 00:12:53,171 --> 00:12:54,767 To sit with us? No, you're right, not yet, not yet. 373 00:12:54,768 --> 00:12:57,499 Can you even imagine rolling into The Bon Voyage Bonfire 374 00:12:57,500 --> 00:12:59,856 -tonight with this momentum? -I'm gonna go see about getting 375 00:12:59,857 --> 00:13:01,786 more honey packets from the lunch lady. 376 00:13:01,787 --> 00:13:03,178 Buzz right back. 377 00:13:03,198 --> 00:13:06,441 Hey, Jill, big news, you're sitting with us today. 378 00:13:06,524 --> 00:13:08,691 Okay, but I won't share my honey packets. 379 00:13:08,788 --> 00:13:10,213 No, no, no, no, no, no! 380 00:13:10,293 --> 00:13:13,203 Did Stacy B. really just steal Jill away to sit with her? 381 00:13:13,226 --> 00:13:15,059 Well, Jill does love bees, 382 00:13:15,060 --> 00:13:16,492 so this works on a lot of levels. 383 00:13:16,493 --> 00:13:20,069 No, no. She can't have Jill, too. I can fix this. 384 00:13:20,171 --> 00:13:22,153 -I have to. -Let it go, Jude. 385 00:13:22,176 --> 00:13:23,416 -Judy! -Oh, no. 386 00:13:23,570 --> 00:13:26,087 (clears throat) Hello, it's me, Judy Tobin. 387 00:13:26,245 --> 00:13:27,935 -Jill's friend. -Jill's friend? 388 00:13:27,936 --> 00:13:31,090 (chuckles): Anyway, I just wanted to address the elephant in the room. 389 00:13:31,091 --> 00:13:32,348 Yes, the rumors are true. 390 00:13:32,349 --> 00:13:33,931 Jill just sat down with Stacy B. 391 00:13:33,932 --> 00:13:35,360 I can't believe this is happening 392 00:13:35,361 --> 00:13:36,547 during my birthday month. 393 00:13:36,548 --> 00:13:39,532 -What a gift. -But Jill is still our friend. 394 00:13:39,631 --> 00:13:41,948 She's not leaving us for Stacy B. or whatever. 395 00:13:41,949 --> 00:13:43,733 She will be back with us very soon, 396 00:13:43,734 --> 00:13:45,404 and a thank you, and, um, and drive safe. 397 00:13:45,405 --> 00:13:48,298 And, uh, come on back, Jill. 398 00:13:48,299 --> 00:13:49,732 (scoffs) Let's get out of here, Jill. 399 00:13:49,733 --> 00:13:51,254 I have a piece of toast in my locker 400 00:13:51,255 --> 00:13:53,166 that looks exactly like Shawn Mendes. 401 00:13:53,167 --> 00:13:54,411 It's gonna blow your mind. 402 00:13:54,412 --> 00:13:55,766 Okay. Well, she's just gonna go, 403 00:13:55,767 --> 00:13:58,164 and then we'll go, and then we'll all see her later. 404 00:13:58,165 --> 00:13:59,831 (laughs nervously) 405 00:13:59,853 --> 00:14:02,670 -Well, that was probably fine, right? -Judy, no. 406 00:14:02,844 --> 00:14:05,014 It wasn't fine. It was embarrassing and bad. 407 00:14:05,017 --> 00:14:06,959 Yeah, seriously, Judy, let it go. 408 00:14:07,189 --> 00:14:08,355 I'm sorry, but no! 409 00:14:08,356 --> 00:14:10,364 The days of Stacy B. treating me like garbage 410 00:14:10,365 --> 00:14:11,415 have to be over. 411 00:14:11,416 --> 00:14:13,296 I know where she hangs out after school. 412 00:14:13,297 --> 00:14:14,892 Let's just please go there later and get Jill back 413 00:14:14,893 --> 00:14:16,471 in time for the Bon Voyage Bonfire. 414 00:14:16,472 --> 00:14:18,172 We're finally getting cool. 415 00:14:18,177 --> 00:14:19,976 -Please? -Geez, Judy, fine. 416 00:14:19,977 --> 00:14:22,245 Okay, I'll go physically, but mentally I'm gonna be 417 00:14:22,246 --> 00:14:24,903 at my favorite place: the bulk bins in the grocery store, 418 00:14:24,904 --> 00:14:28,348 sticking my hands in the malt balls because it feels great. 419 00:14:28,505 --> 00:14:30,839 Hello, Paulie, how are you today? 420 00:14:30,840 --> 00:14:33,092 In the middle of a particularly riveting episode 421 00:14:33,093 --> 00:14:34,780 of Pretty Little Liars, that's how I am. 422 00:14:34,781 --> 00:14:36,860 -Now, can I help you with something? -I hope so. 423 00:14:36,861 --> 00:14:38,698 I accidentally threw away a cactus, and... 424 00:14:38,699 --> 00:14:41,289 -(gasps) I can't believe it. -Yeah, it's stressful. 425 00:14:41,290 --> 00:14:44,122 One of the Pretty Little Liars just dropped a huge truth bomb. 426 00:14:44,123 --> 00:14:45,885 Don't see that every day. Now, what's going on? 427 00:14:45,886 --> 00:14:48,968 Paulie, we just need to get back some of the trash I dropped off, 428 00:14:48,969 --> 00:14:53,138 -to retrieve something important. -A.D.A.F., bud. 429 00:14:53,238 --> 00:14:54,813 Oh, man. Oh, man. 430 00:14:54,835 --> 00:14:56,334 Hmm. We're not beaten yet. 431 00:14:56,506 --> 00:14:58,247 I happen to know a secret way in. 432 00:14:58,344 --> 00:14:59,769 Let's get that cac back. 433 00:14:59,770 --> 00:15:02,596 You know, bees actually have big hearts, emotionally, 434 00:15:02,597 --> 00:15:04,026 but tiny hearts, physically, 435 00:15:04,027 --> 00:15:05,956 which often explode during times of stress. 436 00:15:05,957 --> 00:15:08,699 Ugh! Like, take a Xanax and get in the hot tub, bees. 437 00:15:08,856 --> 00:15:11,206 Uh, if you ever put a bee in a hot tub, miss lady, 438 00:15:11,207 --> 00:15:13,218 I'll rip your wings off and feed you your own stinger. 439 00:15:13,219 --> 00:15:15,719 Ugh! Stacy B.'s just doing this to get back at me! 440 00:15:15,817 --> 00:15:18,047 She doesn't even like bees! It makes me sick. 441 00:15:18,048 --> 00:15:19,827 You know what makes me sick, Judy? 442 00:15:19,828 --> 00:15:22,408 The thought of missing Kima's mom's tater tot casserole. 443 00:15:22,409 --> 00:15:24,243 So, what exactly is the plan here? 444 00:15:24,244 --> 00:15:26,921 -Well, I'm gonna go out there and tell Jill- -STACY B.: Oh, my God. 445 00:15:26,922 --> 00:15:28,680 Is that The Three Muska-weirds? 446 00:15:28,911 --> 00:15:31,503 Did you follow us here? That is beyond. 447 00:15:31,504 --> 00:15:33,179 Actually, uh, no, we didn't follow you here. 448 00:15:33,180 --> 00:15:34,868 We came here independently to check on... 449 00:15:34,869 --> 00:15:37,261 the wind, and it sure is blowing, so okay. 450 00:15:37,262 --> 00:15:39,439 Anyway, while we're here, Jill, you should know 451 00:15:39,440 --> 00:15:41,887 that Stacy is only hanging out with you to get back at me. 452 00:15:41,888 --> 00:15:43,559 She's trying to make sure I go back 453 00:15:43,560 --> 00:15:45,618 to being a loser who gets called names 454 00:15:45,639 --> 00:15:47,306 and doesn't have friends, so... 455 00:15:47,403 --> 00:15:49,385 Wait, "doesn't have friends"? 456 00:15:49,386 --> 00:15:51,487 Yeah, I thought we were humiliating ourselves 457 00:15:51,488 --> 00:15:52,750 on this freezing cold dock 458 00:15:52,751 --> 00:15:54,993 so our friend could prove some dumb point. 459 00:15:54,994 --> 00:15:56,576 -I guess not. -Wait, no. Come on. 460 00:15:56,577 --> 00:15:58,173 -That's not fair. -Save it, Judy. 461 00:15:58,174 --> 00:15:59,984 We're supposed to be three queens, 462 00:16:00,012 --> 00:16:02,496 but you just treated us like worker drones. 463 00:16:02,497 --> 00:16:04,005 Ugh, I can't believe I accidentally 464 00:16:04,006 --> 00:16:06,340 learned this much about bees! Let's go, Kima. 465 00:16:06,437 --> 00:16:09,027 Uh, there would never be three queen bees, Amelia! 466 00:16:09,028 --> 00:16:10,690 The hatched queen would kill the other two 467 00:16:10,691 --> 00:16:12,540 by stinging them. (burps) Ooh. 468 00:16:12,697 --> 00:16:15,306 This hot chocolate makes me burp. 469 00:16:15,307 --> 00:16:17,241 Aha! Bingo. 470 00:16:17,242 --> 00:16:19,318 I cut this slit in December 1999, 471 00:16:19,549 --> 00:16:20,731 after I lost my keys 472 00:16:20,886 --> 00:16:23,720 at a particularly wild Dump-2-K party. 473 00:16:23,818 --> 00:16:25,818 Crushed a lot of computers that night. 474 00:16:25,899 --> 00:16:26,949 And a lot of Zimas. 475 00:16:26,950 --> 00:16:28,422 (chuckles): We felt so free. 476 00:16:28,423 --> 00:16:30,577 Kind of cool to be at the dump at night, huh? 477 00:16:30,578 --> 00:16:32,858 I wish I had fewer cockroaches in my pant legs, 478 00:16:32,859 --> 00:16:34,341 but overall, not bad. 479 00:16:34,439 --> 00:16:35,604 Put her in park, son. 480 00:16:35,605 --> 00:16:37,688 This is where they dump the newest trash. 481 00:16:37,689 --> 00:16:39,781 Dad, look, that's got to be our stuff! 482 00:16:39,938 --> 00:16:42,788 Yup, glad I bought those hot pink trash bags on sale. 483 00:16:42,789 --> 00:16:44,783 I was a little afraid they would make our garbage 484 00:16:44,784 --> 00:16:47,301 look too flirty but sure paying off. 485 00:16:47,457 --> 00:16:49,140 Robert? Dad, I found Robert! 486 00:16:49,141 --> 00:16:51,058 -Oh, no, he's... -PAULIE: Hey, stop right there! 487 00:16:51,059 --> 00:16:52,487 I'm putting you in dump jail! 488 00:16:52,488 --> 00:16:54,729 Ham, run. Dump jail is awful. 489 00:16:54,827 --> 00:16:56,811 I got an update on the salmon count, 490 00:16:56,812 --> 00:16:58,929 -if anybody is interested. -No, Walt. -No, Dad. 491 00:16:58,930 --> 00:17:00,509 (clears throat) Don't mind me, um, uh, 492 00:17:00,510 --> 00:17:03,252 just gonna grab my stuff for the bonfire and go. 493 00:17:03,276 --> 00:17:04,500 Yeah, good, go. 494 00:17:04,501 --> 00:17:05,948 Okay, I know a fight when I see one. 495 00:17:05,949 --> 00:17:08,029 What's going on here? And where's bee girl? 496 00:17:08,030 --> 00:17:11,773 (crying): We did have a fight, and we lost the bee girl! 497 00:17:11,799 --> 00:17:13,540 Uh-oh, should I call Chief Edna? 498 00:17:13,696 --> 00:17:15,620 We didn't literally lose her. 499 00:17:15,643 --> 00:17:17,217 We lost her to Stacy B. 500 00:17:17,372 --> 00:17:20,373 And then I lost two other friends, 501 00:17:20,397 --> 00:17:21,896 because I, Judy Tobin, 502 00:17:21,993 --> 00:17:25,662 am just in general terrible at friends! 503 00:17:25,819 --> 00:17:27,411 (crying) 504 00:17:27,412 --> 00:17:29,011 Uh, sorry you suck at being a teen girl 505 00:17:29,012 --> 00:17:31,182 and everything, but shotgun on those tots. 506 00:17:35,346 --> 00:17:37,938 -(sobbing) -What in the hell is going on? 507 00:17:38,036 --> 00:17:40,353 What's going on is that Judy is so obsessed 508 00:17:40,354 --> 00:17:42,289 with proving some dumb point to Stacy B. 509 00:17:42,290 --> 00:17:43,776 that she basically forgot we existed 510 00:17:43,777 --> 00:17:45,217 and said she had "no friends." 511 00:17:45,298 --> 00:17:47,373 I did not! I mean, I did, but... 512 00:17:47,374 --> 00:17:49,475 Judy, these two girls would do anything for you 513 00:17:49,476 --> 00:17:50,886 and to take them for granted like that, 514 00:17:50,887 --> 00:17:52,577 well, you're being a real douche. 515 00:17:52,726 --> 00:17:54,726 -Thank you. -Not so fast. You two? 516 00:17:54,749 --> 00:17:57,459 -Also being douches. -Yeah, Kima, stop being a douche. 517 00:17:57,460 --> 00:17:59,762 -Dane, go to your room. -Are you kidding me? I'm 19. 518 00:17:59,763 --> 00:18:01,504 -Room. -(scoffs) Fine. 519 00:18:01,505 --> 00:18:03,922 As I was saying, Judy here is going through some biz, 520 00:18:03,923 --> 00:18:05,853 and when your friends go through biz, 521 00:18:06,004 --> 00:18:07,670 you don't ice them out like this. 522 00:18:07,671 --> 00:18:09,287 Understood? When you have a husband 523 00:18:09,288 --> 00:18:11,292 who pretty much only likes to talk about 524 00:18:11,293 --> 00:18:13,368 -how the world's about to end... -It is. 525 00:18:13,466 --> 00:18:15,396 ...you realize one thing: life is short, 526 00:18:15,530 --> 00:18:17,955 and you got to hang on to your real friends. 527 00:18:17,956 --> 00:18:20,041 What matters is something you girls already have, 528 00:18:20,042 --> 00:18:22,709 -and it's right here in front of you. -I'm sorry. 529 00:18:22,733 --> 00:18:24,474 -Me, too. -Me three. 530 00:18:24,571 --> 00:18:26,071 I just don't understand, Judy. 531 00:18:26,150 --> 00:18:28,743 We usually don't care about being popular or cool, 532 00:18:28,900 --> 00:18:31,083 but suddenly it's all you can talk about. 533 00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:33,573 Ugh! Stacy B. brings that out in me! 534 00:18:33,670 --> 00:18:35,003 She's my Achilles' heel. 535 00:18:35,004 --> 00:18:36,528 Or maybe my Achilles' toe, because that's 536 00:18:36,529 --> 00:18:38,845 where that stupid BFF toe ring still is. 537 00:18:38,943 --> 00:18:41,185 Judy, Stacy B. is a nonsense person. 538 00:18:41,186 --> 00:18:42,586 Let her have her popularity. 539 00:18:42,587 --> 00:18:44,717 For someone like her, high school is their time. 540 00:18:44,718 --> 00:18:47,223 After high school, you know what's waiting for her? 541 00:18:47,224 --> 00:18:49,563 Nothing. She's peaked. It's all downhill after that. 542 00:18:49,564 --> 00:18:51,293 You know who else it's all downhill for? 543 00:18:51,294 --> 00:18:53,299 -Mother Earth. -Absolutely not, Walter. 544 00:18:53,300 --> 00:18:54,649 -Understood. -Now eat up. 545 00:18:54,650 --> 00:18:56,139 And if you go to that party later, 546 00:18:56,140 --> 00:18:57,643 please make sure the bee girl's all right. 547 00:18:57,644 --> 00:18:59,148 I saw her try to sting the neighbor. 548 00:18:59,149 --> 00:19:00,928 She chased him for a good five minutes. 549 00:19:00,929 --> 00:19:02,595 She shouldn't be unsupervised. 550 00:19:02,596 --> 00:19:05,180 (giggles) That's gonna make dropping off our trash 551 00:19:05,181 --> 00:19:07,665 a little awkward but sure was worth it. 552 00:19:07,839 --> 00:19:09,219 Ham? Everything okay, son? 553 00:19:09,284 --> 00:19:11,267 No, I killed Crispin's cactus. 554 00:19:11,365 --> 00:19:14,625 Oh, no, son, are you worried that Crispin will be mad at you? 555 00:19:14,781 --> 00:19:17,967 I mean, yeah, he might be a little for a minute, 556 00:19:18,124 --> 00:19:20,142 but our relationship is super strong. 557 00:19:20,373 --> 00:19:23,465 I'll say I'm sorry, and he'll be okay. 558 00:19:23,489 --> 00:19:26,139 So then, what are you worried about? 559 00:19:26,238 --> 00:19:28,647 I'm worried about this guy, Dad. 560 00:19:28,670 --> 00:19:30,503 Me, your son, Ham. 561 00:19:30,659 --> 00:19:32,829 I know I'm only 16, and it's a little weird, 562 00:19:32,830 --> 00:19:34,410 but I think about wanting kids someday, 563 00:19:34,411 --> 00:19:35,834 as, like, a life goal, but... 564 00:19:35,835 --> 00:19:37,193 but remember when I won that goldfish 565 00:19:37,194 --> 00:19:39,527 at the fish toss and forgot to feed it? 566 00:19:39,528 --> 00:19:41,019 -You were eight. -Uh-huh. 567 00:19:41,020 --> 00:19:42,460 How that time I watched Moon, 568 00:19:42,524 --> 00:19:44,157 and he ate, like, a whole pie. 569 00:19:44,271 --> 00:19:46,120 He's an unstoppable dessert hole, 570 00:19:46,218 --> 00:19:48,960 -consuming all that surrounds him. -Yeah, but... 571 00:19:49,059 --> 00:19:50,633 those things, and now this. 572 00:19:50,634 --> 00:19:52,960 If I'm not responsible enough to keep a cactus alive, 573 00:19:52,961 --> 00:19:55,149 there's no way I should have an actual human baby. 574 00:19:55,150 --> 00:19:57,576 Oh, Ham, just because you killed a cactus 575 00:19:57,577 --> 00:19:59,812 doesn't mean you won't be a good dad someday. 576 00:19:59,813 --> 00:20:02,664 Look at me. I used to lose my keys and use cable cutters 577 00:20:02,763 --> 00:20:04,154 to break into my own job. 578 00:20:04,174 --> 00:20:05,933 But then, eventually I grew up. 579 00:20:06,164 --> 00:20:09,256 And then one day, I was ready to take care of you kids. 580 00:20:09,281 --> 00:20:11,114 I mean, I wasn't, but I had to. 581 00:20:11,268 --> 00:20:13,619 And then I was. That'll happen to you, too, Ham. 582 00:20:13,734 --> 00:20:16,443 -Just give it time. -Thanks, Dad. I love you. 583 00:20:16,542 --> 00:20:18,542 I guess I ought to text Crispin. 584 00:20:18,543 --> 00:20:19,716 "Hi, Crispin. 585 00:20:19,717 --> 00:20:21,884 "I'm sorry to tell you that Robert went 586 00:20:22,040 --> 00:20:23,420 to the big desert in the sky." 587 00:20:23,545 --> 00:20:27,989 Cactus emoji, ghost emoji, shrug emoji, heart emoji. 588 00:20:27,990 --> 00:20:29,167 And an eggplant. 589 00:20:29,168 --> 00:20:31,059 You know, just to keep it fun. Send. 590 00:20:31,081 --> 00:20:34,323 See you in hell, Roger the Friendly Starfish. 591 00:20:34,423 --> 00:20:36,240 Bon voyage, birth certificate. 592 00:20:36,261 --> 00:20:38,491 This will definitely stir things up at home. 593 00:20:38,509 --> 00:20:40,601 -Whose son even am I? -Is that...? 594 00:20:40,757 --> 00:20:43,107 My best friends forever toe ring from Stacy B.? 595 00:20:43,264 --> 00:20:45,355 You bet it is. It took a lot of baby oil, 596 00:20:45,356 --> 00:20:47,365 but I wrestled it off in Kima's bathroom after dinner. 597 00:20:47,366 --> 00:20:49,108 Bon voyage, Stacy B. 598 00:20:49,130 --> 00:20:51,389 Yeah, bon voyage, dumbass. 599 00:20:51,545 --> 00:20:53,287 Bon voyage, Stacy's phone. 600 00:20:53,383 --> 00:20:54,641 What the...? What? 601 00:20:54,642 --> 00:20:56,055 You said you were getting too many texts. 602 00:20:56,056 --> 00:20:57,560 -I was helping you. -(screams) 603 00:20:57,561 --> 00:21:00,729 All right, let's be good friends and go save Jill. 604 00:21:00,730 --> 00:21:02,816 ♪ They don't want us to be together ♪ 605 00:21:02,817 --> 00:21:05,006 ♪ They say we don't work, like wet weather and leather ♪ 606 00:21:05,007 --> 00:21:06,268 ♪ But when I stick my hands in ♪ 607 00:21:06,269 --> 00:21:07,939 ♪ I feel a joy that's all mine ♪ 608 00:21:07,940 --> 00:21:09,276 ♪ The soothing movin' rhythm of malt balls ♪ 609 00:21:09,277 --> 00:21:11,168 ♪ Makes me freeze in time ♪ 610 00:21:11,190 --> 00:21:12,781 ♪ It may be unsanitary ♪ 611 00:21:12,936 --> 00:21:15,436 ♪ And it may technically be a crime ♪ 612 00:21:15,461 --> 00:21:17,961 ♪ Oh, a dip in the mothball bin ♪ 613 00:21:18,116 --> 00:21:20,468 ♪ Sounds absolutely divine ♪ 614 00:21:20,469 --> 00:21:22,461 ♪ A perfect match like Alice Toklas ♪ 615 00:21:22,462 --> 00:21:24,484 ♪ And her sweetie pie Gertrude Stein ♪ 616 00:21:24,485 --> 00:21:26,698 ♪ I feel like I've died and gone to heaven ♪ 617 00:21:26,699 --> 00:21:30,659 ♪ 'Cause, baby, my hands are in the bulk bin. ♪ 618 00:21:30,709 --> 00:21:35,259 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 48417

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.