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00:00:01,697 --> 00:00:03,217
- Warning. The following
program contains really course,
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00:00:03,220 --> 00:00:06,270
language, weed, alcohol
consumption, smoking,
3
00:00:06,267 --> 00:00:08,307
and sexual inferences.
4
00:00:08,312 --> 00:00:11,362
This content may not be
suitable for viewers under 18
5
00:00:11,359 --> 00:00:13,449
To activate parental controls.
6
00:00:13,448 --> 00:00:15,358
Please press the go
[bleep] yourself button
7
00:00:15,363 --> 00:00:16,673
On your remote control.
8
00:00:17,930 --> 00:00:20,590
[calming music]
9
00:00:29,072 --> 00:00:30,682
- You know how I wanna
fight an alligator?
10
00:00:30,682 --> 00:00:34,212
This thing's teaching
me some secret tricks
11
00:00:34,208 --> 00:00:36,378
and I am gonna
fucking fight one.
12
00:00:36,384 --> 00:00:38,214
- You're not fighting
an alligator.
13
00:00:38,212 --> 00:00:41,692
- I can now, cause now I know
how to do it even better.
14
00:00:41,693 --> 00:00:44,393
- As opposed to before where
you knew absolutely nothing
15
00:00:44,392 --> 00:00:45,962
- But you know what?
16
00:00:45,958 --> 00:00:47,868
I've gotta, I do have a
bit of respect for him
17
00:00:47,873 --> 00:00:50,183
Because he's not afraid to
fight a fucking alligator
18
00:00:50,180 --> 00:00:52,660
He's tried to and
it didn't happen.
19
00:00:52,661 --> 00:00:55,271
But he went out there
and tried to do it.
20
00:00:55,272 --> 00:00:56,842
- Ricky, what's the tip?
21
00:00:59,711 --> 00:01:04,461
- If you were on land, you
get on the alligator's back
22
00:01:04,455 --> 00:01:08,195
and put downward
pressure on its neck.
23
00:01:08,198 --> 00:01:09,768
- We already knew that.
24
00:01:09,765 --> 00:01:11,325
- This will force its
head and jaws down.
25
00:01:11,332 --> 00:01:12,902
Cover the alligator's eyes.
26
00:01:12,898 --> 00:01:16,028
This will usually
make it more sedate.
27
00:01:17,077 --> 00:01:18,727
- Yeah, Sedate.
28
00:01:18,730 --> 00:01:20,430
- Go for the eyes and nose.
29
00:01:20,428 --> 00:01:22,868
If you were attacked,
use any weapon you have
30
00:01:22,865 --> 00:01:23,865
Or your fist.
31
00:01:23,866 --> 00:01:25,256
- No shit.
32
00:01:25,259 --> 00:01:26,429
- We know all this.
33
00:01:26,434 --> 00:01:28,004
- I don't need any weapons.
34
00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:29,610
It's gonna be fucking
bare fucking hands.
35
00:01:29,611 --> 00:01:30,961
- You're gonna
punch an alligator.
36
00:01:30,960 --> 00:01:32,310
- Right in the fucking eye.
37
00:01:33,267 --> 00:01:34,877
- Can you choke one out?
38
00:01:34,877 --> 00:01:36,307
Can you choke out an alligator?
39
00:01:36,313 --> 00:01:37,843
- Let's find out.
40
00:01:37,836 --> 00:01:39,356
- Cause if you're
gonna get on his back
41
00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:40,880
to keep him down, you
put him in a chokehold.
42
00:01:40,883 --> 00:01:41,933
- The sleeper.
43
00:01:41,927 --> 00:01:43,797
- Oh, Here you go.
44
00:01:43,799 --> 00:01:45,799
If your jaws, if its jaws
are closed on something
45
00:01:45,801 --> 00:01:49,021
you want to remove, such
as your arm or your leg.
46
00:01:49,021 --> 00:01:51,631
You tap or punch
it on the snout.
47
00:01:51,633 --> 00:01:53,903
- Yeah. Oh yeah.
48
00:01:53,896 --> 00:01:57,246
he's not just gonna be
fucking snaggled onto it.
49
00:01:57,247 --> 00:01:59,287
He's gonna snap it
right off, you know how.
50
00:01:59,293 --> 00:02:00,863
- I see, You know what?
51
00:02:00,859 --> 00:02:02,379
There's no animal on
the fucking planet
52
00:02:02,383 --> 00:02:03,953
that likes getting
hit in the nose.
53
00:02:03,949 --> 00:02:06,209
- If the alligator
gets you in its jaws
54
00:02:06,213 --> 00:02:11,223
you must prevent it from shaking
you or from rolling over.
55
00:02:13,002 --> 00:02:14,482
- Oh. If it roll, got you
in, in death row, your dying.
56
00:02:14,482 --> 00:02:15,872
- Cause it can
cause tissue damage
57
00:02:15,874 --> 00:02:17,444
- Oh it will rip your arm off
58
00:02:17,441 --> 00:02:19,051
- Oh, it will rip
your arm off, man.
59
00:02:19,051 --> 00:02:20,841
- Tissue damage, I think
is a nice way of saying
60
00:02:20,836 --> 00:02:22,316
Rip your fucking arm right off.
61
00:02:22,316 --> 00:02:24,136
- Try to try. Keep
the mouth clamps shut.
62
00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:26,624
So the alligator does
not begin shaking.
63
00:02:26,624 --> 00:02:28,544
- If you can get your
hand on his mouth,
64
00:02:28,539 --> 00:02:29,929
he can't open his mouth.
65
00:02:29,932 --> 00:02:31,762
- No, he's got no muscles
66
00:02:31,760 --> 00:02:32,800
- his muscles to open
are barely enough to open
67
00:02:32,804 --> 00:02:33,984
the fucking thing
68
00:02:33,979 --> 00:02:35,159
- This is important too...
69
00:02:35,155 --> 00:02:36,365
- But his clamp or muscles.
70
00:02:36,373 --> 00:02:37,553
Oh, fuck.
71
00:02:37,548 --> 00:02:38,938
- This could save your life.
72
00:02:38,941 --> 00:02:42,251
Seek medical
attention immediately.
73
00:02:42,249 --> 00:02:44,429
Even for a small cut or bruise.
74
00:02:44,425 --> 00:02:46,335
- You need to read
that out of a book.
75
00:02:48,603 --> 00:02:53,173
- Alligators have a
large number of pathogens
76
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:54,613
in their mouths.
77
00:02:55,784 --> 00:02:56,614
- Yeah.
78
00:02:56,611 --> 00:02:57,441
- Okay.
79
00:02:58,526 --> 00:03:00,346
- Filthy creatures.
80
00:03:00,354 --> 00:03:04,754
- Danger zone is within 15
feet. So how quick there guys.
81
00:03:04,749 --> 00:03:05,579
So don't think your safe.
82
00:03:05,576 --> 00:03:06,746
- They're fast.
83
00:03:06,751 --> 00:03:07,931
- Don't think you're safe.
84
00:03:07,926 --> 00:03:09,836
- Don't think you're safe.
85
00:03:09,841 --> 00:03:11,021
- Ricky? Who thought I was
safe around an alligator?
86
00:03:11,016 --> 00:03:12,016
I don't go near alligators.
87
00:03:12,017 --> 00:03:13,757
- You do at the zoo.
88
00:03:13,758 --> 00:03:15,928
- But they're in a
fucking cage aren't they?
89
00:03:15,934 --> 00:03:17,764
- Did you know they can
jump 15 feet in the air?
90
00:03:17,762 --> 00:03:19,722
- They can't jump 15
feet in the air man.
91
00:03:19,721 --> 00:03:21,511
- Alligators can't jump 15 feet
92
00:03:21,505 --> 00:03:23,725
Their legs are fucking
six inches long.
93
00:03:23,725 --> 00:03:26,285
- Well what the fuck was
that than that can do that?
94
00:03:26,293 --> 00:03:28,163
- Kangaroo?
95
00:03:28,164 --> 00:03:30,654
- Kangaroos can't even
jump 15 feet straight up.
96
00:03:30,645 --> 00:03:33,255
You know how high that
is? Maybe a kangaroo.
97
00:03:33,256 --> 00:03:35,216
- Maybe they can. Okay.
98
00:03:35,215 --> 00:03:39,385
- Oh, suppose you're walking
along and you drop something
99
00:03:39,393 --> 00:03:41,263
and then you forget about it
and then you turn back and go,
100
00:03:41,264 --> 00:03:42,874
Fuck I dropped my phone
101
00:03:42,874 --> 00:03:44,704
and you turn around
there's an alligator
102
00:03:44,702 --> 00:03:45,532
- Yeah
103
00:03:45,529 --> 00:03:46,529
- Right by it.
104
00:03:46,530 --> 00:03:48,100
- Yep
105
00:03:48,097 --> 00:03:49,617
- This is how you
retrieve some shit.
106
00:03:49,620 --> 00:03:50,930
You gotta determine the
size of the alligator
107
00:03:51,927 --> 00:03:53,357
Calculate the distance.
108
00:03:53,363 --> 00:03:54,933
- Get out your measuring tape.
109
00:03:54,930 --> 00:03:56,500
Tell him to hold
it with his teeth
110
00:03:56,497 --> 00:03:58,717
while you fucking get
her back by his tail.
111
00:03:58,716 --> 00:04:01,066
- Make a loud noise.
112
00:04:01,066 --> 00:04:02,676
They don't like
loud noises. See?
113
00:04:02,677 --> 00:04:04,897
- No, fuck you
114
00:04:04,896 --> 00:04:07,246
- When I fucking first
go at it I'm gonna go.
115
00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:09,247
[Screaming]
116
00:04:09,249 --> 00:04:11,339
And then it's gonna
be fucking, ah,
117
00:04:11,338 --> 00:04:13,428
And then I'm gonna get
right around back and start
118
00:04:13,427 --> 00:04:14,597
You know
119
00:04:14,602 --> 00:04:17,342
Fucking cunking around his neck.
120
00:04:17,344 --> 00:04:18,784
- Cunking around his neck.
121
00:04:20,216 --> 00:04:21,736
What? What animal are
you talking about?
122
00:04:21,739 --> 00:04:22,649
- An alligator.
123
00:04:22,653 --> 00:04:23,483
- Yeah.
124
00:04:23,480 --> 00:04:24,660
- Fuck them.
125
00:04:24,655 --> 00:04:25,735
- You're gonna yell at it.
126
00:04:25,743 --> 00:04:27,313
- Scared.
127
00:04:27,310 --> 00:04:28,310
- Yeah that's gonna
fucking scare them.
128
00:04:28,311 --> 00:04:29,271
- It's gonna scare it.
129
00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:30,529
- Six feet.
130
00:04:30,531 --> 00:04:31,361
- Oh fuck.
131
00:04:31,358 --> 00:04:33,268
- 15 feet.
132
00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:35,453
- See they can fucking jump
like 20 feet, 5 feet though.
133
00:04:35,449 --> 00:04:38,149
- Yeah. When they're
boinking along
134
00:04:38,147 --> 00:04:40,757
they can boing
fucking fire that way
135
00:04:40,758 --> 00:04:41,758
straight up.
136
00:04:41,759 --> 00:04:43,239
- So could your mom
137
00:04:43,239 --> 00:04:44,849
I had to throw that in Bubs
138
00:04:46,503 --> 00:04:48,423
- How to escape from a charging
rhino. That would suck.
139
00:04:48,418 --> 00:04:49,418
- Ricky
140
00:04:49,419 --> 00:04:50,289
- what do you do?
141
00:04:50,290 --> 00:04:50,990
- Climb a tree.
142
00:04:52,074 --> 00:04:53,254
- What if there's no trees?
143
00:04:53,249 --> 00:04:54,899
- Stand your ground and shout.
144
00:04:54,903 --> 00:04:55,903
- No
145
00:04:55,904 --> 00:04:56,734
- Yeah, Good luck
146
00:04:56,731 --> 00:04:57,471
- No fucking way
147
00:04:57,471 --> 00:04:59,041
No way
148
00:04:59,037 --> 00:04:59,687
- Good luck, I saw how
that went in Jumanji
149
00:04:59,690 --> 00:05:00,690
- Yeah.
150
00:05:00,691 --> 00:05:01,871
- Fucked oh well.
151
00:05:01,866 --> 00:05:03,346
- If you do that you're fucked
152
00:05:04,869 --> 00:05:06,219
- [Clarence] Come on
Bo lets get me some
153
00:05:06,218 --> 00:05:07,218
different fucking books.
154
00:05:07,219 --> 00:05:08,999
- Clarence, fuck off
155
00:05:09,004 --> 00:05:10,754
Those are the books
you're getting. I'm sorry.
156
00:05:10,745 --> 00:05:13,045
- Please tell me you
got the HTC done.
157
00:05:13,051 --> 00:05:14,271
- I got the cooker made
158
00:05:14,270 --> 00:05:16,580
- Yes thank fuck
159
00:05:16,577 --> 00:05:18,707
- Right? So I can start
pumping out hot dogs
160
00:05:18,709 --> 00:05:19,709
it's all ready to go.
161
00:05:19,710 --> 00:05:21,190
It works? you tested it?
162
00:05:21,190 --> 00:05:23,060
- Yes. It's working
fucking great.
163
00:05:23,061 --> 00:05:25,331
And you can pump out as
many hot dogs as you want.
164
00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:26,325
- Nice job buddy.
165
00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:27,886
Nice job. All right.
166
00:05:27,892 --> 00:05:29,422
We gotta get some better
books going here, man.
167
00:05:30,852 --> 00:05:32,332
What is that? The
Cokesbury party book.
168
00:05:32,332 --> 00:05:33,902
- You didn't enjoy that?
169
00:05:33,898 --> 00:05:36,158
- It sucked, it was
written in like 1940.
170
00:05:36,161 --> 00:05:38,561
They were talking about having
hobo parties and stuff and.
171
00:05:38,555 --> 00:05:40,115
- Yeah, that's hobo parties.
172
00:05:40,122 --> 00:05:41,302
They're fucking hilarious.
173
00:05:41,297 --> 00:05:42,777
- Maybe back in 1940, they were.
174
00:05:42,777 --> 00:05:44,907
- Everybody gets
dressed up as hobos.
175
00:05:44,909 --> 00:05:47,389
- But that's not the kind of
thing I want do on a business.
176
00:05:47,390 --> 00:05:49,960
- I've read this book
3 times cover to cover.
177
00:05:49,958 --> 00:05:51,918
That is a fantastic book.
178
00:05:51,916 --> 00:05:53,526
And I stand by my
recommendation.
179
00:05:53,527 --> 00:05:55,787
- Oh, What about this one than?
180
00:05:55,790 --> 00:05:57,530
A picture book of
Prince of Edward Island.
181
00:05:57,531 --> 00:05:58,751
Are you kidding me?
182
00:05:58,749 --> 00:05:59,919
- That's fantastic, you can
183
00:05:59,924 --> 00:06:01,494
- I wanna learn stuff.
184
00:06:01,491 --> 00:06:03,411
- If you hold just
at the right spot.
185
00:06:03,406 --> 00:06:05,226
You can convince yourself that
you're in prince Edward Hall.
186
00:06:05,234 --> 00:06:07,374
- I don't give a fuck about
being a PEI right now.
187
00:06:07,367 --> 00:06:09,367
The only thing I care about
right now is making money.
188
00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:11,279
I want something that
would teach me something.
189
00:06:11,283 --> 00:06:12,423
I want something
190
00:06:12,415 --> 00:06:13,675
- Oh look, I just got this in
191
00:06:13,677 --> 00:06:15,417
Look at this all gerbils
192
00:06:15,418 --> 00:06:17,118
- What the fuck is that
gonna do for me Bub's?
193
00:06:17,115 --> 00:06:18,115
- There's all kinds.
194
00:06:18,116 --> 00:06:19,936
- You just don't get it.
195
00:06:19,944 --> 00:06:21,864
You have no idea how much
there is to know about gerbils
196
00:06:21,859 --> 00:06:23,029
until you start reading this.
197
00:06:23,034 --> 00:06:24,914
- And how is that gonna help me?
198
00:06:24,906 --> 00:06:27,166
Oh, I can make lots of money
reading a fucking gerbil book.
199
00:06:27,169 --> 00:06:30,779
- Well, I don't, I'm not
talking about money, but I mean,
200
00:06:30,781 --> 00:06:33,261
Gerbils is such a great book.
201
00:06:33,262 --> 00:06:35,182
Look, there's a
book on the brain.
202
00:06:35,177 --> 00:06:36,177
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
203
00:06:36,178 --> 00:06:37,178
That one right there.
204
00:06:37,179 --> 00:06:38,919
- Neuroendocrinology.
205
00:06:38,920 --> 00:06:40,400
- That's the kind of
shit I'm talking about.
206
00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:41,580
That's the shit
you can learn stuff
207
00:06:41,575 --> 00:06:43,785
You know, brains and shit.
208
00:06:43,794 --> 00:06:46,414
- You get one more pick from
just from the front area.
209
00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:47,836
Just this area.
210
00:06:47,842 --> 00:06:48,672
- I know what I
want. I want this one
211
00:06:48,669 --> 00:06:49,499
- No, no, no.
212
00:06:49,496 --> 00:06:50,496
- No, no, no.
213
00:06:50,497 --> 00:06:52,057
- Great pop stars.
214
00:06:52,063 --> 00:06:53,503
- Great pop stars. I'm
renting that one again.
215
00:06:53,500 --> 00:06:54,760
- Bubs you've
rented it every week
216
00:06:54,762 --> 00:06:56,552
Since we've been in here.
217
00:06:56,546 --> 00:06:57,806
- Well I'm not finish.
218
00:06:57,808 --> 00:06:58,808
- You're hogging it
219
00:06:58,809 --> 00:06:59,639
- I'm not hogging it.
220
00:06:59,636 --> 00:07:00,806
I put it back.
221
00:07:00,811 --> 00:07:02,381
- It's mostly a picture book
222
00:07:02,378 --> 00:07:03,378
- I put it back on
the cart every week.
223
00:07:03,379 --> 00:07:04,949
- It's a picture book.
224
00:07:04,946 --> 00:07:06,506
- I put the book on
the cart every week.
225
00:07:06,513 --> 00:07:08,253
- Yes, then you end up
renting it out again.
226
00:07:08,253 --> 00:07:10,343
Oh, I know what you're
doing with that book.
227
00:07:10,342 --> 00:07:11,262
- What?
228
00:07:11,256 --> 00:07:12,476
- Blondie
229
00:07:12,475 --> 00:07:13,685
[chuckles]
230
00:07:13,694 --> 00:07:16,354
Pat Benatar, Madonna.
231
00:07:16,348 --> 00:07:17,918
Yes you were.
232
00:07:17,915 --> 00:07:19,435
- There's pictures
of them in there.
233
00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:21,659
- Yeah okay, So what
are you doing with it?
234
00:07:21,658 --> 00:07:23,178
- I'm reading the...
235
00:07:23,181 --> 00:07:25,791
- Reading, reading
all the long articles.
236
00:07:25,793 --> 00:07:27,323
The description of each picture.
237
00:07:27,316 --> 00:07:28,536
- I'm reading about
Leonard Skinner.
238
00:07:28,535 --> 00:07:30,885
I was and Ozzy Ozbourne.
239
00:07:30,885 --> 00:07:32,315
- [Scoff] Bullshit
240
00:07:32,321 --> 00:07:33,931
That's my book, Great pop star.
241
00:07:33,931 --> 00:07:36,111
- All right go, you can
keep looking at that.
242
00:07:36,107 --> 00:07:37,327
Just gimme another book, man.
243
00:07:37,326 --> 00:07:38,756
I want...
244
00:07:38,762 --> 00:07:40,292
- Hey, just wait.
245
00:07:40,285 --> 00:07:42,065
There's one. This one
looks pretty good.
246
00:07:43,419 --> 00:07:45,069
The Apprentice
Wizard. There you go.
247
00:07:45,073 --> 00:07:47,383
You can pretend
you're Harry Potter
248
00:07:47,379 --> 00:07:48,859
- Apprentice Wizard
249
00:07:48,859 --> 00:07:50,029
Well, there might be
some shit in here, man.
250
00:07:50,034 --> 00:07:51,514
I believe in some of that shit.
251
00:07:51,514 --> 00:07:53,174
- The Apprentice Wizard,
252
00:07:53,168 --> 00:07:56,168
brains and brains
and apprenticeship.
253
00:07:57,738 --> 00:07:58,568
Okay.
254
00:07:58,565 --> 00:07:59,435
Whoa whoa, no
255
00:08:00,349 --> 00:08:02,179
I'm taking that one.
256
00:08:02,177 --> 00:08:04,607
Till five o'clock I'm
gonna be down there.
257
00:08:04,614 --> 00:08:06,794
That's when you can
come get the thing.
258
00:08:06,790 --> 00:08:08,920
- Come get the
thing. What thing?
259
00:08:08,923 --> 00:08:11,883
The fucking hot dog go
get it at five o'clock
260
00:08:11,882 --> 00:08:13,752
- Bubs I'm not trying to
take that thing out of there.
261
00:08:13,754 --> 00:08:15,324
You know what happens
262
00:08:15,320 --> 00:08:16,800
if I get caught with
that fucking thing
263
00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:18,670
trying to take it out
of there, I'll get
264
00:08:18,672 --> 00:08:20,542
- I will get searched.
265
00:08:20,543 --> 00:08:22,333
- Yeah. What happens if
I kick the fucking thing?
266
00:08:22,327 --> 00:08:24,847
I get searched again.
You never been searched
267
00:08:24,852 --> 00:08:26,592
- Bubs you're not
gonna get searched.
268
00:08:26,593 --> 00:08:28,123
- That's what you
said the last time
269
00:08:28,116 --> 00:08:30,116
and I got fingered.
270
00:08:30,118 --> 00:08:31,988
- Bubs you know I'm
sorry that happened
271
00:08:31,989 --> 00:08:33,509
- I listened.
272
00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:35,433
- I know I feel
for you, but Bubs
273
00:08:35,427 --> 00:08:36,467
I've got a plan okay?
274
00:08:36,472 --> 00:08:37,602
You and I are business.
275
00:08:37,604 --> 00:08:39,344
- I am not selling your hot dogs
276
00:08:39,344 --> 00:08:41,704
- You are gonna fucking
sell them please.
277
00:08:41,695 --> 00:08:43,305
Okay. We're business
partners here
278
00:08:43,305 --> 00:08:44,825
- Ill smash the fucking thing
279
00:08:44,828 --> 00:08:46,528
- We are business partners okay?
280
00:08:46,526 --> 00:08:48,436
It's better for me to sit here
281
00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:50,400
Read as much as I can try
to fucking get some kind
282
00:08:50,399 --> 00:08:51,749
Of an idea what
the fuck were doing
283
00:08:51,748 --> 00:08:53,318
we get outta here. Okay.
284
00:08:53,315 --> 00:08:56,135
- Why can't I have
that job. I'd do it.
285
00:08:56,144 --> 00:08:57,934
- I've got it figured out.
286
00:08:57,928 --> 00:09:00,148
- I'd like to be the guy
watching dragon and going, oh,
287
00:09:00,148 --> 00:09:01,018
I'm doing research.
288
00:09:01,018 --> 00:09:02,188
- Exactly.
289
00:09:02,193 --> 00:09:04,073
We're gonna get outta here.
290
00:09:04,065 --> 00:09:05,585
We're gonna open up a bunch
of small businesses. Okay.
291
00:09:05,588 --> 00:09:07,328
I've got, I'm figuring
them out right now.
292
00:09:07,329 --> 00:09:10,419
We're gonna franchise
out the fire burn Jim.
293
00:09:10,419 --> 00:09:11,769
- And I'm a business partner
294
00:09:11,768 --> 00:09:13,728
- And you're a business partner.
295
00:09:13,727 --> 00:09:15,337
We're gonna fucking burn Jim's
296
00:09:15,337 --> 00:09:17,637
right across the fucking
country if we wanted to
297
00:09:17,644 --> 00:09:19,384
- Julian I can't get caught.
298
00:09:19,384 --> 00:09:20,304
- You're not gonna get caught
299
00:09:20,298 --> 00:09:21,468
Listen, Larry's
300
00:09:21,473 --> 00:09:23,563
Larry's in this with us, okay?
301
00:09:23,563 --> 00:09:25,653
He's getting a buck a
hot dog on the deal.
302
00:09:25,652 --> 00:09:27,962
He's in. He doesn't give a fuck.
303
00:09:27,958 --> 00:09:29,348
- You swear? Larry knows.
304
00:09:29,351 --> 00:09:30,401
- I swear Larry knows
305
00:09:30,395 --> 00:09:31,565
- Okay.
306
00:09:31,571 --> 00:09:32,701
- And we're business partners.
307
00:09:32,702 --> 00:09:34,922
- Were business partners.
308
00:09:34,922 --> 00:09:37,102
- No, I want, I
want free hot dogs.
309
00:09:37,098 --> 00:09:38,268
[scoffs]
310
00:09:38,273 --> 00:09:40,283
- You can have one free hot dog.
311
00:09:40,275 --> 00:09:41,615
- Two is what I'm getting
312
00:09:41,624 --> 00:09:42,804
- Two?
313
00:09:42,799 --> 00:09:43,969
- I'll tell you right now.
314
00:09:43,974 --> 00:09:44,984
Not doing it for less than two.
315
00:09:44,975 --> 00:09:46,535
- You can take one.
316
00:09:46,542 --> 00:09:48,152
- Two hot dogs,
business partners.
317
00:09:48,152 --> 00:09:51,372
And Larry knows that's
the fucking deal.
318
00:09:51,373 --> 00:09:53,683
- All right. Just go sell
some fucking hot dogs please.
319
00:09:53,680 --> 00:09:55,510
And please get me
some better books.
320
00:09:56,508 --> 00:09:59,078
- These books are fine.
321
00:09:59,076 --> 00:10:00,726
- No, this one's fine.
322
00:10:00,730 --> 00:10:03,250
- I'll tell you. That's
I'll tell you right now.
323
00:10:03,254 --> 00:10:06,564
If I get fingered, there's
gonna be fucking hell to pay
324
00:10:06,562 --> 00:10:08,562
- You're not gonna
get fingered. Okay.
325
00:10:08,564 --> 00:10:10,044
I swear to fuck.
326
00:10:10,044 --> 00:10:11,614
I promise you. You
will not get fingered.
327
00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:12,961
- Well that's what you
said the first time.
328
00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:14,140
And I got it
329
00:10:14,135 --> 00:10:15,135
- Just sell the fucking hot dogs
330
00:10:16,354 --> 00:10:17,754
Thank you.
331
00:10:17,747 --> 00:10:19,007
All right. Love you, man.
332
00:10:21,011 --> 00:10:23,541
Yeah. I feel bad for bubbles
because he got searched.
333
00:10:23,535 --> 00:10:26,315
Well fingered, but
it wasn't my fault.
334
00:10:26,321 --> 00:10:28,631
I can't be around him 24
hours a day holding his hand.
335
00:10:28,628 --> 00:10:31,108
He's gotta be a little
smarter when he is in here.
336
00:10:31,108 --> 00:10:34,018
It's easy. All you gotta do
is stick to the game plan.
337
00:10:34,024 --> 00:10:35,944
Sell a shit ton of hot dogs.
338
00:10:35,939 --> 00:10:37,769
Don't fuck up.
339
00:10:37,767 --> 00:10:39,507
We make a lot of money along
with the money I've got waiting
340
00:10:39,508 --> 00:10:41,638
for us on the outside
with Jay rock and Tina
341
00:10:41,641 --> 00:10:43,471
That's a nice pile of money.
342
00:10:43,468 --> 00:10:46,118
[Elegant music]
343
00:10:52,521 --> 00:10:53,481
- Oh we're rolling?
344
00:10:56,046 --> 00:10:57,736
Thanks for telling me.
345
00:11:00,442 --> 00:11:03,312
Good afternoon,
ladies and gentleman.
346
00:11:03,314 --> 00:11:05,674
You might have noticed
that I'm sporting my new
347
00:11:05,665 --> 00:11:06,925
Donald Trump look
348
00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:12,280
how do I look?
349
00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:15,280
Today we have a
very exciting story
350
00:11:15,283 --> 00:11:18,033
with Jim Lee and liquor stories.
351
00:11:18,025 --> 00:11:21,375
We're gonna be talking about
the Christian brothers from the
352
00:11:21,376 --> 00:11:23,726
sand junking valley
from California
353
00:11:24,858 --> 00:11:28,208
Way back in 1882.
354
00:11:28,209 --> 00:11:31,129
They blended all these
wonderful things.
355
00:11:31,125 --> 00:11:33,945
This, I think it was from,
I forget what it was,
356
00:11:33,954 --> 00:11:36,044
but they made this
incredible drink.
357
00:11:36,043 --> 00:11:41,053
Ladies and gentlemen, it's a
Brandy and this is wonderful.
358
00:11:42,136 --> 00:11:43,826
Christian brothers brandy
359
00:11:43,833 --> 00:11:45,103
can be sniffed
360
00:11:47,837 --> 00:11:49,267
drunk on the rocks.
361
00:11:52,799 --> 00:11:54,019
You can have a high ball
362
00:11:56,933 --> 00:12:01,203
or you can be blended with
a fruit juices and coffee.
363
00:12:04,462 --> 00:12:05,292
Or
364
00:12:06,769 --> 00:12:08,339
Ah.
365
00:12:08,336 --> 00:12:10,156
You can just enjoy
it just like it is.
366
00:12:19,129 --> 00:12:24,089
This is a story about the
resiliency of mankind.
367
00:12:25,179 --> 00:12:26,959
This is a story of Jim Lee.
368
00:12:26,963 --> 00:12:29,663
And his most creative momentary
369
00:12:31,141 --> 00:12:35,411
way back when Barb, when
Barb was into religion,
370
00:12:35,406 --> 00:12:36,966
she used to go to
church all the time.
371
00:12:36,973 --> 00:12:39,803
She used to make me go
to church all the time
372
00:12:39,802 --> 00:12:42,332
and maybe twice a week sometimes
373
00:12:42,326 --> 00:12:45,456
I used to get pretty bored
and I was searching around
374
00:12:45,460 --> 00:12:47,550
Like I used to try to
do crossword puzzles,
375
00:12:47,549 --> 00:12:49,029
but I wasn't that good at them
376
00:12:50,682 --> 00:12:54,692
You know what I
discovered at a yard sale
377
00:12:54,686 --> 00:12:56,556
the most wonderful thing.
378
00:12:56,558 --> 00:12:58,078
And guess what it was.
379
00:12:58,081 --> 00:13:02,221
It was the Christian
brothers Brandy book,
380
00:13:02,216 --> 00:13:06,256
and it had eight little
bottles of Brandy in it.
381
00:13:06,263 --> 00:13:09,223
Now I, here's one of
the original ones.
382
00:13:09,223 --> 00:13:11,013
I'll tell you more
about that later.
383
00:13:12,443 --> 00:13:14,493
I took this to church with me
384
00:13:15,882 --> 00:13:18,752
And during church when
nobody was looking
385
00:13:18,754 --> 00:13:20,234
I'd take out a little bottle
386
00:13:20,234 --> 00:13:22,024
and I'd have a little drinky poo
387
00:13:22,018 --> 00:13:26,198
And it made the whole
thing very, very wonderful.
388
00:13:26,196 --> 00:13:29,626
But on Christmas
Eve, we were there
389
00:13:29,634 --> 00:13:32,774
and the service was way
fucking longer than usual.
390
00:13:32,768 --> 00:13:34,548
I usually used to
drink three or four,
391
00:13:34,552 --> 00:13:35,822
just sipping away like
392
00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:38,295
[mocking praise]
393
00:13:38,295 --> 00:13:40,075
stuff like that.
394
00:13:40,080 --> 00:13:42,780
But then they got there singing
these Christmas hymns, ah,
395
00:13:42,778 --> 00:13:47,128
Yes, these one on and on and on.
396
00:13:47,130 --> 00:13:51,610
I was into it for about seven
bottles and there was only one
397
00:13:51,613 --> 00:13:56,313
bottle left that's this
one and Barb made me
398
00:13:56,313 --> 00:13:58,793
nudge me, made me
go up for communion.
399
00:13:58,794 --> 00:14:01,014
So when I was going
up to the communion,
400
00:14:01,014 --> 00:14:02,934
I was a little bit tipsy topsy
401
00:14:02,929 --> 00:14:05,629
and I fucking tripped
over the alter rail there,
402
00:14:05,627 --> 00:14:07,537
and whacked me into the priest
403
00:14:07,542 --> 00:14:10,682
Fucking bottle went
up way up in the air.
404
00:14:10,675 --> 00:14:14,235
Seven empty bottles went
flying along in there
405
00:14:14,244 --> 00:14:17,384
came down smashing the
thing, booking down
406
00:14:17,378 --> 00:14:19,638
knocked the priest
out on the thing.
407
00:14:19,641 --> 00:14:22,771
I went, [mocking
praise] didn't work.
408
00:14:22,774 --> 00:14:26,954
Anyway, when the candles
got knocked over,
409
00:14:26,953 --> 00:14:30,573
it was a congregation and
the whole congregation,
410
00:14:30,565 --> 00:14:32,865
it was like, oh, the humanity.
411
00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:35,222
They went screaming
from the church.
412
00:14:35,222 --> 00:14:37,092
And guess what?
413
00:14:37,093 --> 00:14:39,843
I have saved this little
bottle as a commemoration.
414
00:14:39,835 --> 00:14:41,875
This is a magic
bottle and someday
415
00:14:42,969 --> 00:14:44,189
What?
416
00:14:44,187 --> 00:14:45,057
That's not the one
417
00:14:46,146 --> 00:14:48,446
Who the fuck took my bottle?
418
00:14:48,452 --> 00:14:50,152
Where's my bottle?
419
00:14:50,150 --> 00:14:52,980
This is ridiculous for fuck sake
420
00:14:55,111 --> 00:14:58,201
What the hell's going on here?
421
00:14:58,201 --> 00:14:59,811
Give me my God damn bottle
422
00:14:59,811 --> 00:15:02,641
Listen, did you take my bottle?
423
00:15:02,640 --> 00:15:03,820
For fucks sake
424
00:15:04,860 --> 00:15:06,910
Wheres my magic bottle?
425
00:15:06,906 --> 00:15:09,816
Where's my fucking magic bottle?
426
00:15:09,821 --> 00:15:12,961
[Leaf blower blowing]
427
00:15:16,263 --> 00:15:17,263
- Fuck sakes
428
00:15:17,264 --> 00:15:20,444
[Leaf blower blowing]
429
00:15:36,718 --> 00:15:38,588
Starting to look like a nice
Halloween party in here now.
430
00:15:38,589 --> 00:15:40,809
So you can do as many
fucking rolls as you want,
431
00:15:42,289 --> 00:15:43,459
The other thing you
wanna do for people
432
00:15:43,464 --> 00:15:45,294
That really fuck you around
433
00:15:45,292 --> 00:15:47,472
Flaming shit bags, I fucking
love flaming shit bags.
434
00:15:47,468 --> 00:15:50,118
Get some dog shit, stinkiest
dog shit you can find.
435
00:15:50,123 --> 00:15:52,433
kind of mash it up a little
bit so its extra stinky
436
00:15:52,429 --> 00:15:53,739
You start fucking knocking
437
00:15:55,650 --> 00:15:57,910
Light that on fire
and you take off
438
00:15:57,913 --> 00:15:59,613
then they come to the door
and they're like, ah fuck
439
00:15:59,610 --> 00:16:00,610
What's this?
440
00:16:02,265 --> 00:16:03,085
Ah, fuck.
441
00:16:04,615 --> 00:16:06,095
I guess I probably shouldn't
442
00:16:06,095 --> 00:16:07,225
have used real
dog shit for that.
443
00:16:11,361 --> 00:16:12,931
The flaming shit bags
444
00:16:12,928 --> 00:16:14,058
give some one who
fucks you around
445
00:16:14,060 --> 00:16:15,630
a little bit of toilet paper.
446
00:16:15,626 --> 00:16:16,796
I mean, it doesn't
really do much.
447
00:16:16,801 --> 00:16:18,721
It just looks fucked, I guess.
448
00:16:18,716 --> 00:16:19,886
So the one thing that always
works for people that really
449
00:16:19,891 --> 00:16:21,421
Fucking piss you off ,eggs.
450
00:16:21,415 --> 00:16:23,975
Cuz they're a son of
a whore to clean off.
451
00:16:23,983 --> 00:16:25,853
I found over my lives
452
00:16:25,854 --> 00:16:27,294
that the biggest fucking
dicks in the world always
453
00:16:27,290 --> 00:16:28,860
live in these big fancy
richy type houses.
454
00:16:28,857 --> 00:16:30,637
So there's always
lots to aim at.
455
00:16:30,641 --> 00:16:33,471
So I got like a kind of a richy
dicky looking house there,
456
00:16:33,470 --> 00:16:35,430
Fucking dicks and they're
big stupid houses.
457
00:16:35,429 --> 00:16:37,339
So you take your
sling shooter and just
458
00:16:39,563 --> 00:16:41,093
Just disturb them
459
00:16:41,087 --> 00:16:42,087
Pounding them right
off the fucking house.
460
00:16:42,088 --> 00:16:42,868
Till they come outside.
461
00:16:44,916 --> 00:16:47,006
Or you can just
fucking do it by hand.
462
00:16:47,006 --> 00:16:48,136
Pretend you're pitcher.
463
00:16:51,140 --> 00:16:54,450
If you can hit the house,
that'd be really good.
464
00:16:54,448 --> 00:16:56,538
That's why I'm not a pitcher.
465
00:16:56,537 --> 00:16:57,487
There's a nice one.
466
00:16:59,931 --> 00:17:01,021
Fucking bastard.
467
00:17:02,499 --> 00:17:04,109
Fuck I hate dicks
468
00:17:05,633 --> 00:17:07,203
Sometimes we just
get so pissed off.
469
00:17:07,200 --> 00:17:08,900
Take the whole fucking
carton and just go...
470
00:17:10,725 --> 00:17:14,765
Fuck you, rich fucking fuck
471
00:17:14,772 --> 00:17:18,302
Ah, fuck
472
00:17:20,213 --> 00:17:22,353
Try cleaning that up
you fucking asshole.
473
00:17:23,433 --> 00:17:24,433
- I like sake
474
00:17:24,434 --> 00:17:26,184
- Sake's good, man.
475
00:17:26,175 --> 00:17:28,825
- You've never had
fucking sake in your life.
476
00:17:28,830 --> 00:17:29,830
- Yeah, I have man.
477
00:17:29,831 --> 00:17:30,831
- What's it taste like
478
00:17:30,832 --> 00:17:32,752
- Liquor, like strong
479
00:17:32,747 --> 00:17:34,137
- Does not.
480
00:17:34,140 --> 00:17:36,060
- What does it taste like then
481
00:17:36,055 --> 00:17:38,355
[armpit fart]
482
00:17:38,361 --> 00:17:39,751
- Taste like hot monster
483
00:17:40,972 --> 00:17:42,062
Just like your mother.
484
00:17:42,061 --> 00:17:44,281
[laughing]
485
00:17:46,326 --> 00:17:50,156
Get it, get it
mustardy old thing.
486
00:17:51,331 --> 00:17:52,161
Okay.
487
00:17:53,768 --> 00:17:56,548
- That was not nice, man.
488
00:17:56,553 --> 00:17:58,083
- Is mustard made from yeast.
489
00:18:00,166 --> 00:18:02,556
- It's made from mustard seeds.
490
00:18:02,559 --> 00:18:04,079
I believe
491
00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:04,873
- Your mother must
grow them. Does she?
492
00:18:04,866 --> 00:18:06,086
- Yep.
493
00:18:06,085 --> 00:18:07,995
- Cause it smells really bad.
494
00:18:07,999 --> 00:18:09,829
- And they rub flys.
495
00:18:09,827 --> 00:18:12,607
- Okay. I was just trying
to make a light joke.
496
00:18:12,613 --> 00:18:13,883
- Well, you really hit it hard
497
00:18:13,875 --> 00:18:15,785
- Didn't want to get into it
498
00:18:15,790 --> 00:18:16,790
you guys are the ones that
started talking about the
499
00:18:16,791 --> 00:18:18,621
interior.
500
00:18:18,619 --> 00:18:19,789
- Do you got anything
else to talk about besides
501
00:18:19,794 --> 00:18:21,624
Fucking kids dying in rivers?
502
00:18:21,622 --> 00:18:25,062
- Yes, listen to this, this,
fucking I want see this.
503
00:18:25,060 --> 00:18:29,330
They found a bird in
Siberia, a frozen bird.
504
00:18:29,325 --> 00:18:30,325
- Yep.
505
00:18:30,326 --> 00:18:31,886
- 46,000 years old.
506
00:18:31,893 --> 00:18:33,853
- Fuck off, no birds
could live that long.
507
00:18:36,289 --> 00:18:38,549
46,000 is like,
that's fucking old.
508
00:18:38,552 --> 00:18:40,252
- It's not alive. Ricky.
509
00:18:40,249 --> 00:18:41,119
It's frozen.
510
00:18:42,208 --> 00:18:44,078
- Well, how did he get frozen?
511
00:18:44,079 --> 00:18:48,299
- He died 46,000 years ago.
And he just froze into the ice.
512
00:18:48,301 --> 00:18:51,521
And now he's like fully intact
feathers and everything.
513
00:18:51,521 --> 00:18:53,001
46,000 years old.
514
00:18:53,001 --> 00:18:54,131
- You know what if it was.
515
00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:56,003
- He's not 46,000 years old then
516
00:18:56,004 --> 00:18:57,884
he was probably
fucking seven or eight.
517
00:18:57,875 --> 00:18:59,395
And then he just.
518
00:18:59,399 --> 00:19:02,529
- Well his body, his
body's 46,000 years old
519
00:19:02,532 --> 00:19:03,662
- Why didn't they say that?
520
00:19:03,664 --> 00:19:05,454
- It's confusing
521
00:19:05,448 --> 00:19:07,278
- Because people think the
birds fucking 46,000 years old.
522
00:19:07,276 --> 00:19:08,576
He's not old
523
00:19:08,582 --> 00:19:09,932
- No one would ever think a bird
524
00:19:09,931 --> 00:19:11,591
could live 46,000 years, man.
525
00:19:11,585 --> 00:19:12,405
- One person would.
526
00:19:12,412 --> 00:19:13,412
- One. Yeah.
527
00:19:13,413 --> 00:19:14,593
You're the only one.
528
00:19:14,588 --> 00:19:16,198
- What if you were a kid?
529
00:19:16,198 --> 00:19:18,418
- A kid might think that.
530
00:19:20,159 --> 00:19:22,599
if he was, can you
imagine if he was alive
531
00:19:22,596 --> 00:19:24,286
and he was 46,000.
532
00:19:24,293 --> 00:19:26,213
- I was gonna say scorpions.
You could do that.
533
00:19:26,208 --> 00:19:28,468
Like heat them up back to life.
534
00:19:29,516 --> 00:19:30,686
- What?
535
00:19:30,691 --> 00:19:31,781
- Yeah man. Freeze a scorpion.
536
00:19:31,779 --> 00:19:32,949
- Scorpion.
537
00:19:32,954 --> 00:19:34,134
- Yes you can freeze one.
538
00:19:34,129 --> 00:19:35,829
Heat it up. It's it's good.
539
00:19:35,826 --> 00:19:36,866
- Heat it up how? A Microwave
540
00:19:36,871 --> 00:19:38,051
- That's a frog.
541
00:19:38,046 --> 00:19:39,526
- Just let them thaw out man.
542
00:19:39,526 --> 00:19:40,656
And then all of a
suddenly start moving.
543
00:19:40,657 --> 00:19:42,177
- No, that's a frog man.
544
00:19:42,181 --> 00:19:43,311
You freeze frogs and
they come back to life.
545
00:19:43,312 --> 00:19:45,012
- Scorpions are the same thing.
546
00:19:45,009 --> 00:19:46,529
- No scorpions are
547
00:19:46,533 --> 00:19:48,143
- Remember when I
was a little guy
548
00:19:48,143 --> 00:19:50,623
and wanted to change my
name to frog man jackson
549
00:19:50,624 --> 00:19:52,714
- A frog doesn't have
a stinger on its back.
550
00:19:52,713 --> 00:19:53,893
- You guys remember that?
551
00:19:53,888 --> 00:19:55,058
- What?
552
00:19:55,063 --> 00:19:56,893
- Remember? I was a little guy
553
00:19:56,891 --> 00:19:58,281
I wanted to change my
name to frog man jackson.
554
00:19:58,284 --> 00:20:00,244
- Yeah that was fucked
555
00:20:00,242 --> 00:20:01,422
- I forgot about that.
556
00:20:01,417 --> 00:20:02,417
- It would've been beat up, man.
557
00:20:02,418 --> 00:20:04,198
- I wonder why that was.
558
00:20:04,203 --> 00:20:05,203
- It was weird.
559
00:20:05,204 --> 00:20:07,034
- That was weird.
560
00:20:07,031 --> 00:20:10,731
- So what if the bird came back
to life and he could tell us
561
00:20:10,731 --> 00:20:12,561
what it was like then.
562
00:20:12,559 --> 00:20:15,209
- Well if he came back to
life and could speak English,
563
00:20:15,214 --> 00:20:17,434
that would be quite a story.
564
00:20:17,433 --> 00:20:18,743
Quite a story.
565
00:20:19,653 --> 00:20:21,183
Hey, what's going on?
566
00:20:22,743 --> 00:20:25,833
Jesus. Is everything
ever modern?
567
00:20:25,833 --> 00:20:27,273
That's what he'd say.
568
00:20:27,269 --> 00:20:28,879
- He'd be fucking
freaked out wouldn't he?
569
00:20:28,879 --> 00:20:31,319
- Wow. I've never
seen a car before.
570
00:20:31,317 --> 00:20:33,007
- What the fuck
is all this shit?
571
00:20:34,755 --> 00:20:37,575
- Fuck when I died, it
was just snow around here.
572
00:20:39,542 --> 00:20:41,332
- You have to watch
him for shotguns
573
00:20:43,198 --> 00:20:47,028
He would've been a lot happier
back at 20, 26,000 years old.
574
00:20:47,898 --> 00:20:49,728
- 46,000.
575
00:20:49,726 --> 00:20:52,766
- It was not many fucking things
to get hurt with back then.
576
00:20:52,773 --> 00:20:54,563
- Ricky, what are
you talking about?
577
00:20:56,298 --> 00:20:59,478
46,000 years ago. There was all
kinds of things to get hurt.
578
00:20:59,475 --> 00:21:02,295
- Sounds like the most dangerous
thing to him was winter.
579
00:21:05,916 --> 00:21:08,266
- Well maybe you don't
know how he got killed.
580
00:21:08,267 --> 00:21:11,397
He though he might have
got killed by a cave, man.
581
00:21:11,400 --> 00:21:12,400
- What the fuck
is going on here?
582
00:21:12,401 --> 00:21:13,321
- All right.
583
00:21:14,925 --> 00:21:16,615
You and your fucking smart box.
584
00:21:16,623 --> 00:21:18,843
- No they put the, this
guy froze a scorpion.
585
00:21:18,842 --> 00:21:21,022
He's gonna bring
him back to life.
586
00:21:21,018 --> 00:21:22,018
- How do you know?
587
00:21:22,019 --> 00:21:23,589
- In the microwave?
588
00:21:23,586 --> 00:21:25,936
- I don't know why he's
fucking with microwave.
589
00:21:25,936 --> 00:21:28,286
wouldn't think that
would help him out any.
590
00:21:28,287 --> 00:21:29,287
- Well.
591
00:21:29,288 --> 00:21:30,458
- Oh this guys fucked
592
00:21:30,463 --> 00:21:31,993
I can't listen to this guy.
593
00:21:31,986 --> 00:21:34,856
- He's got no pants on,
what did you search?
594
00:21:34,858 --> 00:21:36,598
he's naked from the waist down.
595
00:21:37,644 --> 00:21:39,214
- How do I get.
596
00:21:39,210 --> 00:21:39,860
- Where's he putting
the scorpion now?
597
00:21:39,863 --> 00:21:40,953
- Bubs
598
00:21:40,951 --> 00:21:42,481
- Done, done.
599
00:21:42,475 --> 00:21:44,385
- Jesus, he was putting
it up his up his hoop.
600
00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:47,700
- All right. What's going on.
601
00:21:47,697 --> 00:21:49,177
- More death.
602
00:21:49,177 --> 00:21:50,177
You done with death
603
00:21:50,178 --> 00:21:51,308
- Or are we done?
604
00:21:51,310 --> 00:21:52,490
- Yeah, I was just settled.
605
00:21:52,485 --> 00:21:54,225
We were talking about that bird.
606
00:21:54,225 --> 00:21:56,655
- What's the, what's the
what's so good about it.
607
00:21:58,447 --> 00:22:01,577
- Well, it's just the oldest
bird they have now Ricky.
608
00:22:01,581 --> 00:22:03,321
- What about a pterodactyl?
609
00:22:04,932 --> 00:22:07,242
[laughing]
610
00:22:07,238 --> 00:22:08,588
- Bubs
611
00:22:08,588 --> 00:22:09,588
I can't.
612
00:22:09,589 --> 00:22:11,369
I can't deal with that.
613
00:22:11,373 --> 00:22:14,773
- Whatever. The big, big
winging flying fucking thing.
614
00:22:14,768 --> 00:22:16,898
- That's from Fred
Flintstone, Ricky.
615
00:22:16,900 --> 00:22:18,470
I mean they really did exist.
616
00:22:18,467 --> 00:22:20,077
Pterodactyls
617
00:22:20,077 --> 00:22:21,207
- Pterodactyls
618
00:22:21,209 --> 00:22:22,599
- Pterodactyls
619
00:22:22,602 --> 00:22:24,172
- Yeah.
620
00:22:24,168 --> 00:22:26,428
- Imagine if there was
pterodactyls again.
621
00:22:26,432 --> 00:22:30,002
The cock sucker's
wingspans were like 50 feet
622
00:22:30,000 --> 00:22:30,830
or something crazy.
623
00:22:30,827 --> 00:22:31,697
- 50?
624
00:22:31,698 --> 00:22:33,528
[laughing]
625
00:22:33,526 --> 00:22:35,086
- Maybe not that big.
626
00:22:35,092 --> 00:22:37,662
What was the wingspan
of a pterodactyl please?
627
00:22:39,445 --> 00:22:42,965
I need to know. I think there
was some that were 20 feet.
628
00:22:42,970 --> 00:22:44,490
- Oh, there was some big,
629
00:22:44,493 --> 00:22:46,103
you might be right
with the 50 man.
630
00:22:46,103 --> 00:22:47,543
- They were some big
cock suckers Ricky.
631
00:22:47,540 --> 00:22:48,720
- Yeah fuck that's big
632
00:22:48,715 --> 00:22:50,235
That's bigger than an aircraft.
633
00:22:50,238 --> 00:22:52,108
- Well, no, not bigger
than an aircraft.
634
00:22:52,109 --> 00:22:53,329
They couldn't have
been the size of
635
00:22:53,328 --> 00:22:58,118
Fucking Airbus 319, I suppose.
636
00:22:58,115 --> 00:23:00,935
- Wouldn't want one of those
coming at you, would you?
637
00:23:00,944 --> 00:23:02,124
- Okay.
638
00:23:02,119 --> 00:23:03,119
- Not if it was had teeth.
639
00:23:03,120 --> 00:23:04,340
- Were they meat eaters?
640
00:23:04,339 --> 00:23:06,909
- They were, I don't know.
641
00:23:06,907 --> 00:23:10,387
They were flying around
eating something.
642
00:23:10,389 --> 00:23:12,129
- Planes probably to that big.
643
00:23:13,435 --> 00:23:15,255
- Could a pterodactyl
carry a human?
644
00:23:15,263 --> 00:23:17,183
That's what people
want to know man.
645
00:23:17,178 --> 00:23:18,478
Holy fuck
646
00:23:20,224 --> 00:23:23,314
It says it could lift a
maximum of 500 pounds or more.
647
00:23:23,314 --> 00:23:24,844
- That's a lot.
648
00:23:24,838 --> 00:23:26,228
- So they could
lift your mother.
649
00:23:26,230 --> 00:23:28,020
[laughing]
650
00:23:28,015 --> 00:23:30,495
[bird sounds]
651
00:23:30,545 --> 00:23:35,095
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