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1
00:01:16,276 --> 00:01:18,210
(I got to go.)
2
00:01:18,278 --> 00:01:19,870
(I got to go.)
3
00:01:21,581 --> 00:01:23,572
(I got to catch a plane.)
4
00:02:06,326 --> 00:02:08,590
Two solid hours of staring at material
5
00:02:08,661 --> 00:02:11,425
to decide to reconvene after the holidays
for a fresh look at the lab.
6
00:02:11,498 --> 00:02:14,058
They're selling cosmetics,
not curing cancer.
7
00:02:14,134 --> 00:02:16,103
Why aren't you going to the airport?
8
00:02:16,170 --> 00:02:18,831
What's the point of busting my ass
to catch the 6 o'clock flight?
9
00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:20,331
Why don't you wait and
go out with me on the 8?
10
00:02:20,350 --> 00:02:22,031
You'll never gonna get a cab at this hour.
11
00:02:22,057 --> 00:02:23,742
I told Susan I'd be home by 9:00.
12
00:02:23,810 --> 00:02:25,038
That's you.
13
00:02:26,013 --> 00:02:29,348
Oh, damn it. I left my gloves in Brian's office.
14
00:02:29,616 --> 00:02:32,551
I don't need them. I get in the elevator,
I get on a taxi, I get on a plane and I'm home.
15
00:02:32,619 --> 00:02:35,952
Would you pick them up for me?
I'll drive over tomorrow and get them.
16
00:02:36,022 --> 00:02:37,546
Have a good holiday.
17
00:02:37,624 --> 00:02:39,057
I'll see you in Chicago, John.
18
00:02:39,125 --> 00:02:41,025
You'll never make the 6.
19
00:03:49,495 --> 00:03:50,553
Taxi!
20
00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:20,590
Cab! Cab!
21
00:04:27,599 --> 00:04:28,328
Sir?
22
00:04:29,103 --> 00:04:31,536
Sir, sir. Excuse me.
23
00:04:31,604 --> 00:04:34,539
I know this is your cab, but I am desperately
late for a plane and I was wondering
24
00:04:34,607 --> 00:04:36,973
if I could I appeal to your good nature
and ask you to let me have it.
25
00:04:37,043 --> 00:04:40,012
I don't have a good nature. Excuse me.
26
00:04:40,079 --> 00:04:41,341
Come on!
27
00:04:41,414 --> 00:04:44,042
Could I offer you $10 for it?
28
00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:45,982
20. I'll give you $20 for it.
29
00:04:46,052 --> 00:04:47,713
I'll take 50.
30
00:04:48,955 --> 00:04:49,979
All right.
31
00:04:50,056 --> 00:04:53,025
Anyone who would pay $50 for a cab...
32
00:04:53,092 --> 00:04:55,151
would certainly pay $75.
33
00:04:55,228 --> 00:04:57,287
Not necessarily.
34
00:04:58,364 --> 00:05:00,264
All right, 75.
35
00:05:00,333 --> 00:05:01,595
You're a thief.
36
00:05:01,668 --> 00:05:03,431
Close. I'm an attorney.
37
00:05:05,905 --> 00:05:07,566
Have a happy holiday.
38
00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:08,971
This will help.
39
00:05:16,249 --> 00:05:17,876
Hey! Hey!
40
00:05:17,950 --> 00:05:20,116
Hey! Hey, that's my cab!
41
00:05:20,286 --> 00:05:21,619
That's my cab!
42
00:05:21,988 --> 00:05:23,387
Pull over! Pull over!
43
00:05:23,456 --> 00:05:24,855
All right! Pull over!
44
00:05:24,924 --> 00:05:27,222
That's my cab!
45
00:05:27,293 --> 00:05:28,726
Pull over, buddy!
46
00:05:28,795 --> 00:05:31,029
You're messing with the wrong guy!
47
00:05:37,370 --> 00:05:39,964
All right, you son of a bitch.
This is my cab! Out!
48
00:05:59,992 --> 00:06:01,152
Excuse me.
49
00:06:03,029 --> 00:06:04,062
Excuse me.
50
00:06:04,230 --> 00:06:05,222
Excuse me.
51
00:06:09,836 --> 00:06:10,894
Excuse me.
52
00:06:13,740 --> 00:06:17,540
Your attention please.
Your attention please.
53
00:06:17,610 --> 00:06:22,175
Mid-Central flight 909 to
Chicago O'hare has been delayed.
54
00:06:22,248 --> 00:06:24,614
All passengers wishing further information,
55
00:06:24,684 --> 00:06:26,675
please contact the ticket agent.
56
00:06:26,753 --> 00:06:28,550
When are Grandma and Grandpa
57
00:06:28,621 --> 00:06:30,384
and Grandma and Grandpa gonna come?
58
00:06:30,456 --> 00:06:32,185
They're gonna be here tomorrow, honey.
59
00:06:32,258 --> 00:06:33,850
- Mom?
- Yeah.
60
00:06:33,926 --> 00:06:37,191
Do you think Grandpa Walt's
gonna give me a noogie?
61
00:06:37,263 --> 00:06:39,695
Of course he's gonna give you a noogie.
He loves to give you noogies.
62
00:06:39,865 --> 00:06:41,496
That's how he tells you that he loves you.
63
00:06:41,567 --> 00:06:43,262
Why doesn't he give me noogies?
64
00:06:43,336 --> 00:06:45,304
Because you get Indian burns.
65
00:06:45,471 --> 00:06:47,703
But I prefer noogies.
66
00:06:49,375 --> 00:06:51,809
Keep an eye on your brother.
67
00:06:53,980 --> 00:06:54,947
Hello.
68
00:06:55,014 --> 00:06:56,447
Who is it?
69
00:06:56,516 --> 00:06:57,949
Where are you?
70
00:06:58,017 --> 00:06:59,541
Who is it?
71
00:06:59,619 --> 00:07:01,280
It's Daddy.
72
00:07:01,354 --> 00:07:02,412
Flight delay.
73
00:07:02,488 --> 00:07:04,786
When do you think you'll be in?
74
00:07:04,857 --> 00:07:06,552
Shouldn't be any later than 10.
75
00:07:06,726 --> 00:07:08,594
I'll wait up for you.
76
00:07:43,696 --> 00:07:45,630
I know you, don't I?
77
00:07:45,698 --> 00:07:47,432
I'm usually very good with names,
78
00:07:47,450 --> 00:07:49,167
but I'll be damned if I haven't forgotten yours.
79
00:07:49,435 --> 00:07:51,499
You stole my cab.
80
00:07:52,905 --> 00:07:55,640
I've never stolen anything in my life.
81
00:07:55,708 --> 00:07:58,643
I hailed a cab on Park Avenue this afternoon,
82
00:07:58,711 --> 00:08:01,578
and before I could get in it, you stole it.
83
00:08:04,317 --> 00:08:07,753
You're the guy who tried to get my cab.
84
00:08:07,820 --> 00:08:10,254
I knew I knew you. Yeah.
85
00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:13,058
You scared the bejesus out of me.
86
00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:21,160
Come to think of it, It was awful easy
to get a cab during rush hour.
87
00:08:21,434 --> 00:08:22,926
Forget it.
88
00:08:23,002 --> 00:08:24,993
I can't forget it.
89
00:08:25,071 --> 00:08:26,504
I am sorry.
90
00:08:26,772 --> 00:08:29,336
I had no idea that was your cab.
91
00:08:29,608 --> 00:08:32,275
Let me make it up to you somehow,
huh, please?
92
00:08:32,345 --> 00:08:35,280
How about a nice hot dog and a beer?
93
00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:36,872
No, thanks.
94
00:08:36,949 --> 00:08:38,780
Just a hot dog, then.
95
00:08:38,951 --> 00:08:41,285
I'm kind of picky about what I eat.
96
00:08:41,354 --> 00:08:42,446
Some coffee.
97
00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:43,489
No.
98
00:08:43,556 --> 00:08:44,454
- Milk?
- No.
99
00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:45,216
- Soda?
- No.
100
00:08:45,291 --> 00:08:46,225
- Some tea?
- No.
101
00:08:46,291 --> 00:08:47,525
- Lifesavers?
- No.
102
00:08:47,594 --> 00:08:49,661
- Slurpee?
- Sir, please.
103
00:08:49,729 --> 00:08:52,289
Just let me know. I'm here.
104
00:08:52,565 --> 00:08:54,299
I knew I knew you.
105
00:08:56,068 --> 00:08:59,335
This is something you should have
discussed with the ticket agent.
106
00:08:59,355 --> 00:09:02,303
I couldn't discuss it with the ticket agent,
because I didn't know he put me in coach.
107
00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:04,969
I'm sorry. I can't help you. First class is full.
108
00:09:05,044 --> 00:09:07,376
I have a first class ticket.
109
00:09:07,446 --> 00:09:09,971
You have a coach seat assignment.
110
00:09:10,049 --> 00:09:11,380
Hi, Larry.
111
00:09:11,450 --> 00:09:12,382
Hi, Liz.
112
00:09:14,954 --> 00:09:16,387
Here okay? How about over there?
113
00:09:16,455 --> 00:09:18,389
Oh, here, there. Anywhere's fine.
114
00:09:18,457 --> 00:09:19,549
Pardon me.
115
00:09:23,462 --> 00:09:26,454
Save your boarding pass and
you'll get a refund on the difference.
116
00:09:26,532 --> 00:09:29,399
I don't want a refund.
I want a seat in first class,
117
00:09:29,468 --> 00:09:32,294
where I was booked and ticketed
over a month ago.
118
00:09:32,312 --> 00:09:34,699
Look, I've had just about enough of you.
119
00:09:34,774 --> 00:09:36,207
Now take your seat.
120
00:09:36,275 --> 00:09:38,409
Oh, you've had about enough of me?
121
00:09:38,000 --> 00:09:41,044
First you delay me, then you bump me.
122
00:09:41,113 --> 00:09:42,703
I can't wait to see what happens next?
123
00:09:42,782 --> 00:09:45,512
Is this a coincidence or what?
124
00:09:45,685 --> 00:09:47,143
Have a seat.
125
00:10:08,507 --> 00:10:10,441
I never did introduce myself.
126
00:10:10,509 --> 00:10:11,942
Del Griffith.
127
00:10:12,011 --> 00:10:13,444
American Light and Fixture,
director of sales,
128
00:10:13,512 --> 00:10:15,447
shower curtain ring division.
129
00:10:17,783 --> 00:10:20,045
I sell shower curtain rings.
130
00:10:20,519 --> 00:10:21,952
Best in the world.
131
00:10:25,524 --> 00:10:27,458
And you are?
132
00:10:27,526 --> 00:10:28,959
Neal Page.
133
00:10:29,028 --> 00:10:32,289
Neal Page. Pleased to meet you, Neal Page.
134
00:10:32,665 --> 00:10:36,165
So what do you do for a living, Neal Page?
135
00:10:36,535 --> 00:10:38,795
- Marketing.
- Marketing? Super, super.
136
00:10:38,871 --> 00:10:41,972
Fabulous. Isn't that nice?
137
00:10:42,041 --> 00:10:44,475
Look, I don't want to be rude, but...
138
00:10:44,543 --> 00:10:47,103
I'm not much of a conversationalist,
139
00:10:47,179 --> 00:10:49,277
and I'd pretty like to finish this article.
140
00:10:49,348 --> 00:10:51,082
A friend wrote it, so...
141
00:10:51,120 --> 00:10:53,484
Don't let me stand in your way.
Please, don't let me stand in your way.
142
00:10:53,552 --> 00:10:56,987
The last thing I want to be remembered
is as an annoying blabbermouth.
143
00:10:59,392 --> 00:11:02,058
You know, nothing grinds my gears
worse than some chowderhead,
144
00:11:02,088 --> 00:11:04,558
who doesn't know when
to keep his big trap shut.
145
00:11:04,630 --> 00:11:08,799
You catch me running off at the mouth,
just give me a poke at the chops.
146
00:11:18,911 --> 00:11:20,435
Oh, that feels good.
147
00:11:20,513 --> 00:11:22,447
Oh, God, I'm telling you.
148
00:11:22,515 --> 00:11:24,506
My dogs are barking today.
149
00:11:32,858 --> 00:11:34,291
That feels better.
150
00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:05,422
Six bucks and my right nut says
we're not landing in Chicago.
151
00:12:23,709 --> 00:12:25,442
- Hello.
- Hi.
152
00:12:25,511 --> 00:12:26,978
Where are you?
153
00:12:27,046 --> 00:12:28,445
I'm in Wichita.
154
00:12:28,514 --> 00:12:29,446
Wichita, Kansas?
155
00:12:29,515 --> 00:12:31,881
Are you all right? What happened?
156
00:12:31,951 --> 00:12:34,185
We couldn't land in Chicago.
157
00:12:34,753 --> 00:12:39,390
I don't understand what Wichita has
to do with a snowstorm in Chicago?
158
00:12:39,458 --> 00:12:41,426
What's going on, Neal?
159
00:12:41,494 --> 00:12:43,694
What's going on, is I am in Wichita.
160
00:12:43,713 --> 00:12:46,523
We took off from New York,
they closed Chicago, and we landed here.
161
00:12:48,467 --> 00:12:49,900
Neal.
162
00:12:54,473 --> 00:12:56,566
Trouble on the home front?
163
00:12:56,942 --> 00:12:59,941
I really don't think that's
any of your concern.
164
00:13:00,312 --> 00:13:02,845
You knowm the finest line a man will walk
165
00:13:02,915 --> 00:13:05,850
is between success at work
and success at home.
166
00:13:05,918 --> 00:13:09,513
I got a motto:
"Like your work, love your wife."
167
00:13:09,588 --> 00:13:11,852
Well, I'll remember that.
168
00:13:12,999 --> 00:13:14,688
What's the flight situation?
169
00:13:14,760 --> 00:13:15,852
Simple.
170
00:13:15,928 --> 00:13:18,863
There's no way on earth
we're gonna get out of here tonight.
171
00:13:18,931 --> 00:13:22,000
We'd have more luck playing
pickup sticks with our butt cheeks.
172
00:13:22,021 --> 00:13:24,367
than we have of getting a flight
out of here before daybreak.
173
00:13:24,435 --> 00:13:26,369
I guess we'll find out soon enough.
174
00:13:26,437 --> 00:13:28,497
By the time the airline cancels this flight,
175
00:13:28,574 --> 00:13:30,007
which they will sooner or later,
176
00:13:30,075 --> 00:13:32,772
you'd have more of a better chance
to find a three-legged ballerina
177
00:13:32,796 --> 00:13:34,370
than you would a hotel room.
178
00:13:35,447 --> 00:13:37,642
You're saying I could be stuck in Wichita?
179
00:13:37,716 --> 00:13:40,014
I'm saying you are stuck in Wichita.
180
00:13:42,421 --> 00:13:44,048
Ladies and gentlemen,
181
00:13:44,123 --> 00:13:46,557
may I have your attention, please.?
182
00:13:46,625 --> 00:13:48,058
I'm sorry to announce
183
00:13:48,127 --> 00:13:50,061
that we're canceling flight 909
184
00:13:50,129 --> 00:13:52,757
due to severe weather in Chicago.
185
00:13:53,532 --> 00:13:57,431
Hi, I was wondering if you had
any rooms available for tonight?
186
00:13:57,803 --> 00:13:59,202
Anything. Anything will do.
187
00:13:59,271 --> 00:14:00,397
- No, I'm sorry.
- All right.
188
00:14:00,472 --> 00:14:01,837
Do you know of any other motel...
189
00:14:08,914 --> 00:14:09,846
Neal.
190
00:14:11,316 --> 00:14:12,811
Hi.
191
00:14:12,885 --> 00:14:14,352
Well?
192
00:14:15,421 --> 00:14:17,753
Welcome to Wichita.
193
00:14:18,523 --> 00:14:20,348
Did you book a room yet?
194
00:14:20,426 --> 00:14:23,020
I couldn't get in anywhere.
195
00:14:23,095 --> 00:14:25,959
As soon as we got off the plane,
you called home,
196
00:14:26,000 --> 00:14:27,228
I called the Braidwood Inn.
197
00:14:27,299 --> 00:14:29,130
I missed that one.
198
00:14:29,201 --> 00:14:30,691
I got an idea.
199
00:14:30,769 --> 00:14:33,502
I know the manager pretty well.
I sold him some rings for his curtains.
200
00:14:34,271 --> 00:14:35,240
If you want to pick up the cab fare,
201
00:14:35,307 --> 00:14:38,000
I'll make sure you get a room for the night.
202
00:14:44,450 --> 00:14:47,578
- Yeah. Yeah, sure. Great.
- All right.
203
00:14:47,653 --> 00:14:51,417
Grab an end of this thing, will you?
Thanks, thanks a lot.
204
00:14:55,360 --> 00:14:56,351
This your trunk?
205
00:14:56,428 --> 00:14:59,999
Yeah. You should try lugging this thing
around New York City.
206
00:15:26,925 --> 00:15:29,660
Where the hell is the motel?
207
00:15:31,430 --> 00:15:33,623
Doobie, is it much farther?
208
00:15:33,699 --> 00:15:34,896
Not much.
209
00:15:34,967 --> 00:15:37,367
Why didn't you take the interstate?
210
00:15:37,436 --> 00:15:39,870
You said your friend has never been here,
211
00:15:39,939 --> 00:15:42,840
so I figured he'd like to look around.
212
00:15:42,908 --> 00:15:45,776
There's nothing on the interstate,
but interstate.
213
00:15:45,794 --> 00:15:47,435
It's the middle of the night.
214
00:15:47,513 --> 00:15:50,380
I know, I know, but he's proud of his town.
215
00:15:50,649 --> 00:15:52,917
You know, that's a rare
damn thing these days.
216
00:16:06,899 --> 00:16:09,534
Take care of the luggage, will you, Doobie?
217
00:16:09,602 --> 00:16:11,335
Okay, Del.
218
00:16:13,305 --> 00:16:15,330
Get off of me.
219
00:16:19,912 --> 00:16:21,345
Stick with me.
220
00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:35,688
Evening, Gus.
221
00:16:38,764 --> 00:16:41,733
Del Griffith! How the hell are you?
222
00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:45,001
Well, I'm still a million bucks shy
of being a millionaire.
223
00:16:46,438 --> 00:16:49,203
Gus, I want you to meet an old friend
of mine. This is Neal Page.
224
00:16:49,225 --> 00:16:50,905
- Neal, Gus Mooney.
- Glad to meet you, Nick.
225
00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:52,005
Nice to meet you.
226
00:16:52,077 --> 00:16:55,945
Gus, I told my friend here you'd be able
to fix him up with a room tonight.
227
00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:58,378
Do you have a major credit card?
228
00:17:00,486 --> 00:17:03,250
Do you still honor those discount
credit cards for the rooms?
229
00:17:03,322 --> 00:17:05,120
Well, I'll have to charge you for a double,
230
00:17:05,191 --> 00:17:07,126
but with the discount, it'll come out even.
231
00:17:07,191 --> 00:17:09,326
Oh, there you go. That's pretty good.
We're saving money already.
232
00:17:09,594 --> 00:17:11,162
We're a pretty good team.
233
00:17:13,030 --> 00:17:14,531
We were on our way
to Chicago from New York
234
00:17:14,559 --> 00:17:16,032
and the storm brought us here.
235
00:17:16,052 --> 00:17:20,094
I know all about it. I must have
half your flight booked in already.
236
00:17:20,572 --> 00:17:23,140
Well, I guess you're all fixed.
237
00:17:23,208 --> 00:17:25,802
So... there you are.
238
00:17:25,878 --> 00:17:28,078
Last room in the complex.
239
00:17:28,347 --> 00:17:29,814
You mean share?
240
00:17:30,916 --> 00:17:34,000
- Hey, easy on that.
- Okay.
241
00:18:02,747 --> 00:18:05,114
- Hell of a cab ride, wasn't it?
- Yeah, yeah. It was a great cab ride.
242
00:18:05,183 --> 00:18:08,119
You don't see cabs like that too often,
you know.
243
00:18:16,328 --> 00:18:18,329
- Want to take a shower?
- No!
244
00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:21,333
No, I meant, did you want to go first?
245
00:18:22,201 --> 00:18:23,634
You thought... I wouldn't...
246
00:18:23,702 --> 00:18:26,138
- What do you think I am?
- Yeah, I know.
247
00:18:26,706 --> 00:18:28,468
Gee, that's funny. That's funny.
248
00:18:54,733 --> 00:18:57,759
Oh, come... come on.
249
00:20:26,257 --> 00:20:27,190
Excuse me.
250
00:20:33,264 --> 00:20:36,700
I'd switch pillows with you,
but I'm allergic to sponge.
251
00:20:36,768 --> 00:20:39,703
I've got a bad allergy to it.
I'd be sneezing all night with that thing.
252
00:20:39,771 --> 00:20:43,706
That's why I carry my own pillow.
It's hypoallergenic.
253
00:20:51,882 --> 00:20:55,286
I had no idea those beer cans
were gonna blow like that.
254
00:20:55,354 --> 00:20:59,789
You left them on a vibrating bed.
What did you think was gonna happen?
255
00:21:00,159 --> 00:21:03,225
It's been a long day.
It just didn't occur to me.
256
00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:08,533
It didn't occur to you,
so I have to sleep in a puddle of beer.
257
00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:10,233
You want to switch?
258
00:21:10,302 --> 00:21:11,860
No, I just want to sleep.
259
00:21:12,304 --> 00:21:14,238
Me, too. I am bushed.
260
00:21:14,706 --> 00:21:15,739
Good night.
261
00:21:15,807 --> 00:21:17,240
Good night.
262
00:21:44,005 --> 00:21:46,169
She's sleeping in our house!
263
00:21:47,005 --> 00:21:49,269
I'll have to burn the sheets!
264
00:21:49,341 --> 00:21:50,977
What if it was one of your friends, huh?
265
00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:52,777
What if the shoe was on the other foot?
266
00:21:52,844 --> 00:21:54,607
I'd go barefoot!
267
00:22:21,006 --> 00:22:23,000
Traffic is resuming at O'Hare field,
268
00:22:23,018 --> 00:22:25,071
and flights will be moving
out of there very shortly.
269
00:22:42,828 --> 00:22:44,261
Sorry.
270
00:22:59,111 --> 00:23:00,840
Goddamn!
271
00:23:02,314 --> 00:23:03,781
- What, what?
- That's it!
272
00:23:03,849 --> 00:23:06,716
If I don't clear my sinuses, I'll snore all night.
273
00:23:07,785 --> 00:23:10,744
If your kid spills his milk, what do you do,
slap him in the head?
274
00:23:10,822 --> 00:23:13,256
What, what, what?
What is that supposed to mean?
275
00:23:13,325 --> 00:23:15,793
You're not a very tolerant person.
276
00:23:15,861 --> 00:23:18,295
Look, you've been under my skin
since New York.
277
00:23:18,363 --> 00:23:20,228
Starting with ripping off my cab.
278
00:23:20,298 --> 00:23:21,925
God, you're a tight-ass.
279
00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:24,798
How would you like a mouthful of teeth?
280
00:23:24,870 --> 00:23:26,394
Oh, and hostile, too.
281
00:23:26,471 --> 00:23:27,970
Nice personality combination.
282
00:23:27,999 --> 00:23:29,463
Hostile and intolerant.
283
00:23:29,541 --> 00:23:30,803
That's borderline criminal.
284
00:23:30,876 --> 00:23:31,900
Screw you!
285
00:23:31,977 --> 00:23:33,810
You spilled beer all over the bed,
286
00:23:33,877 --> 00:23:34,810
you smoke,
287
00:23:34,880 --> 00:23:36,414
you mess up the bathroom...
288
00:23:36,582 --> 00:23:38,000
Who let you stay in the room?
289
00:23:38,083 --> 00:23:40,217
I even let you pay for it,
so you wouldn't feel like an intruder,
290
00:23:40,285 --> 00:23:42,081
which you most certainly are.
291
00:23:42,155 --> 00:23:44,087
- Oh, I'm an intruder?
- Yes, you are an intruder.
292
00:23:44,156 --> 00:23:46,681
I was having a prefectly nice trip,
untill you walked into my life.
293
00:23:46,758 --> 00:23:50,393
I walked into your life? Who was that
who talked my ear off on the plane?
294
00:23:50,461 --> 00:23:51,695
Who was that? I'm curious.
295
00:23:51,763 --> 00:23:55,324
Who told you to book a room? I did.
Out of the goodness of my dumb old heart.
296
00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:57,833
Boy, you are an ungrateful jackass.
297
00:23:58,002 --> 00:24:00,000
Well, go ahead, sleep in the lobby,
see if I care.
298
00:24:00,103 --> 00:24:02,562
I hope you wake up so stiff,
you can't even move.
299
00:24:02,641 --> 00:24:06,769
You're no saint. You got a free cab,
you got a free room,
300
00:24:06,999 --> 00:24:09,780
and someone who'll listen
to your boring stories.
301
00:24:09,848 --> 00:24:13,000
I mean, didn't you notice on the plane
when you started talking,
302
00:24:13,025 --> 00:24:16,000
eventualIy I started reading the vomit bag?
303
00:24:16,388 --> 00:24:18,322
Didn't that give you some sort of clue like,
304
00:24:18,390 --> 00:24:20,800
hey, maybe this guy's not enjoying it?
305
00:24:20,893 --> 00:24:22,826
You know, everything's not an anecdote.
306
00:24:22,894 --> 00:24:24,384
You have to discriminate.
307
00:24:24,463 --> 00:24:26,931
You choose things that are funny
308
00:24:26,998 --> 00:24:28,522
or mildly amusing
309
00:24:28,600 --> 00:24:30,033
or interesting.
310
00:24:30,101 --> 00:24:31,227
You're a miracle.
311
00:24:31,303 --> 00:24:33,863
Your stories have none of that.
312
00:24:33,939 --> 00:24:36,464
They're not even amusing accidentally.
313
00:24:37,641 --> 00:24:39,774
Honey, I'd like you to meet Del Griffith.
314
00:24:39,803 --> 00:24:41,977
He's got some amusing anecdotes for you.
315
00:24:42,045 --> 00:24:45,573
Here's a gun so you can blow
your brains out. You'll thank me for it.
316
00:24:47,685 --> 00:24:51,416
I could tolerate any insurance seminar.
317
00:24:51,489 --> 00:24:56,792
For days, I could sit there and listen to them
go on and on with a big smile on my face.
318
00:24:56,960 --> 00:24:58,654
They'd say: "How can you stand it?"
319
00:24:58,729 --> 00:25:01,963
And I'd say:
"Cause I've been with Del Griffith.
320
00:25:02,033 --> 00:25:03,830
"I can take anything."
321
00:25:03,902 --> 00:25:05,836
You know what they'd say? They'd say:
322
00:25:05,904 --> 00:25:07,838
"I know what you mean.
323
00:25:07,906 --> 00:25:09,897
"The shower curtain ring guy."
324
00:25:11,975 --> 00:25:15,212
It's like going on a date
with a Chatty Cathy doll.
325
00:25:15,280 --> 00:25:18,149
I expect you have a little string
on your chest, you know,
326
00:25:18,176 --> 00:25:19,749
that I pull out and have to snap back.
327
00:25:20,418 --> 00:25:22,787
Except I wouldn't pull it out
and snap it back, you would.
328
00:25:25,957 --> 00:25:29,017
By the way, you know,
when you're telling these little stories,
329
00:25:29,094 --> 00:25:30,755
here's a good idea.
330
00:25:30,829 --> 00:25:32,262
Have a point.
331
00:25:32,330 --> 00:25:35,265
It makes it so much more interesting
for the listener.
332
00:25:49,214 --> 00:25:51,000
You want to hurt me?
333
00:25:51,216 --> 00:25:54,000
Go right ahead,
if it makes you feel any better.
334
00:25:54,219 --> 00:25:55,846
I'm an easy target.
335
00:25:58,223 --> 00:25:59,952
Yeah, you're right.
336
00:26:00,025 --> 00:26:01,788
I talk too much.
337
00:26:01,860 --> 00:26:04,090
I also listen too much.
338
00:26:05,162 --> 00:26:08,758
I could be a cold-hearted cynic like you.
339
00:26:09,533 --> 00:26:11,825
But I don't like to hurt people's feelings.
340
00:26:13,703 --> 00:26:15,100
Well, you think what you want about me.
341
00:26:15,173 --> 00:26:16,640
I'm not changing.
342
00:26:16,708 --> 00:26:18,676
I like... I like me.
343
00:26:18,743 --> 00:26:20,802
My wife likes me.
344
00:26:20,879 --> 00:26:23,006
My customers like me.
345
00:26:23,081 --> 00:26:25,140
'Cause I'm the real article.
346
00:26:25,216 --> 00:26:28,044
What you see is what you get.
347
00:28:46,791 --> 00:28:48,117
Del.
348
00:28:48,193 --> 00:28:49,922
Hmm? Yeah.
349
00:28:49,994 --> 00:28:52,428
Why did you kiss my ear?
350
00:28:54,032 --> 00:28:56,660
Why are you holding my hand?
351
00:28:58,369 --> 00:29:00,269
Where's your other hand?
352
00:29:00,338 --> 00:29:02,169
Between two pillows.
353
00:29:03,374 --> 00:29:05,274
Those aren't pillows!
354
00:29:23,895 --> 00:29:26,929
- See that Bears' game last week?
- Yeah, hell of game. Hell of a game.
355
00:29:26,952 --> 00:29:30,227
Bears've got a great team this year.
They're gonna go all the way.
356
00:29:59,030 --> 00:30:04,524
Hey, Neal, take my socks out of the sink
if you're going to brush your teeth, all right?
357
00:30:10,608 --> 00:30:12,041
Where are you?
358
00:30:12,110 --> 00:30:13,543
I'm in Wichita.
359
00:30:13,611 --> 00:30:14,869
You're still at the airport?
360
00:30:14,906 --> 00:30:18,511
No, I'm at a motel. I spent the night
with this guy I met on the plane.
361
00:30:18,583 --> 00:30:22,284
You shared a motel room with a stranger?
Are you crazy?
362
00:30:22,321 --> 00:30:24,149
Not yet, but I'm getting there.
363
00:30:24,222 --> 00:30:26,156
Did you call the airline?
364
00:30:26,224 --> 00:30:29,591
Everything's booked solid, but they said
I have a good chance of getting on standby.
365
00:30:31,162 --> 00:30:33,427
And if they told you wolverines
would make good house pets,
366
00:30:33,457 --> 00:30:34,394
would you believe them?
367
00:30:34,465 --> 00:30:35,899
I'm not spending Thanksgiving in Wichita.
368
00:30:35,968 --> 00:30:38,958
I got a family waiting for me. I'll get home.
369
00:30:40,004 --> 00:30:41,437
Not by airplane.
370
00:30:41,606 --> 00:30:44,942
They got 18 hours of air traffic backed up.
371
00:30:45,009 --> 00:30:49,375
Anyway you slice it, the odds are we're
going to have our turkey roll right here.
372
00:30:49,848 --> 00:30:51,582
If we wait for the flight.
373
00:30:51,600 --> 00:30:54,316
- How the hell else can we get home?
- Thanks.
374
00:30:54,786 --> 00:30:57,721
Burt Dingman. A buddy of mine.
He works for the railroad.
375
00:30:57,989 --> 00:30:59,689
- Train?
- Yeah.
376
00:30:59,789 --> 00:31:01,524
I sold them all their shower curtain rings.
377
00:31:01,592 --> 00:31:02,587
He owes me a favor.
378
00:31:05,429 --> 00:31:07,864
I'll get that. I paid for everything else.
379
00:31:07,932 --> 00:31:09,399
Why break precedent?
380
00:31:09,467 --> 00:31:12,061
You're making me feel like a freeloader.
381
00:31:12,136 --> 00:31:14,800
Get me on the train, we're square.
382
00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:17,869
You got it. That's the easy part.
383
00:31:21,880 --> 00:31:23,848
What?
384
00:31:23,915 --> 00:31:26,748
You know goddamn well what.
385
00:31:27,518 --> 00:31:29,150
I'm sorry. I don't.
386
00:31:29,220 --> 00:31:32,519
I had over $700 in here.
387
00:31:32,790 --> 00:31:36,526
I didn't touch you dough, Neal.
I'm a lot of things, but I'm not a thief.
388
00:31:36,594 --> 00:31:39,063
You went into my stuff last night, right?
389
00:31:39,231 --> 00:31:41,265
I didn't take your money.
390
00:31:41,333 --> 00:31:43,066
And I don't care for the accusation.
391
00:31:43,134 --> 00:31:46,703
Well, I had over $700 in here.
You went into my wallet for pizza.
392
00:31:46,770 --> 00:31:49,071
Just maybe when you went into it,
you had to--
393
00:31:49,140 --> 00:31:50,232
Count it!
394
00:31:50,308 --> 00:31:52,000
Oh, like you'd keep it in there if you stole it.
395
00:31:52,020 --> 00:31:53,443
There's $263 in there.
396
00:31:53,472 --> 00:31:55,770
There's a dollar more,
then you can call me a thief.
397
00:31:56,549 --> 00:31:57,546
Just count it.
398
00:31:57,849 --> 00:31:59,146
Count it!
399
00:31:59,217 --> 00:32:01,185
263, right?
400
00:32:04,355 --> 00:32:06,557
- Empty.
- What?!
401
00:32:13,131 --> 00:32:14,689
We were robbed.
402
00:32:14,766 --> 00:32:16,791
Do you think so?
403
00:32:16,935 --> 00:32:18,562
You know, I've been thinking.
404
00:32:19,636 --> 00:32:21,769
What we're dealing with here
is a small time crook.
405
00:32:21,940 --> 00:32:24,374
He didn't take the credit cards, right?
406
00:32:24,442 --> 00:32:26,376
So we charge our way home.
407
00:32:26,442 --> 00:32:28,076
What kind of plastic do you carry?
408
00:32:28,144 --> 00:32:30,242
I've got a Visa and a gasoline card.
409
00:32:30,264 --> 00:32:34,000
Oh, I've got a Neiman-Marcus card
in case we want to buy a gift for someone.
410
00:32:34,052 --> 00:32:35,000
What have you got?
411
00:32:35,107 --> 00:32:37,000
Chalmer's Big and Tall Men's Shoppe.
412
00:32:37,056 --> 00:32:39,784
It's a seven-outlet chain
in the Pacific Northwest.
413
00:32:39,858 --> 00:32:41,052
Great stuff.
414
00:32:41,358 --> 00:32:43,452
Unfortunately, it does us no good here.
415
00:32:43,528 --> 00:32:45,162
Oh, never mind.
416
00:32:45,330 --> 00:32:48,224
Just get me to the train station
and I'll take care of everything else.
417
00:32:48,400 --> 00:32:51,066
Oh, I got all that covered.
Gus' son is going to pick us up.
418
00:32:55,540 --> 00:32:57,572
This is not him, is it?
419
00:32:57,642 --> 00:32:59,439
Gee, I hope not.
420
00:33:34,412 --> 00:33:35,845
Are you Gus' son?
421
00:33:35,913 --> 00:33:37,505
I'm Owen.
422
00:33:41,284 --> 00:33:42,714
You the shower curtain fella?
423
00:33:42,787 --> 00:33:44,812
Yeah. Yeah. Del Griffith.
424
00:33:44,889 --> 00:33:46,413
How are you?
425
00:33:46,491 --> 00:33:48,857
This is Neal Page from Chicago.
426
00:33:48,926 --> 00:33:49,893
Hi.
427
00:33:49,961 --> 00:33:52,220
Pleased to meet you both.
428
00:33:59,903 --> 00:34:02,737
I'm to drive you to Wichita to catch a train?
429
00:34:02,807 --> 00:34:04,365
Yeah, we'd appreciate it.
430
00:34:04,442 --> 00:34:07,309
Train don't run out of Wichita.
431
00:34:07,378 --> 00:34:10,176
'Lessen you're a hog or cattle.
432
00:34:13,818 --> 00:34:17,219
People train runs out of Stubbville.
433
00:34:17,288 --> 00:34:18,755
That'll be fine.
434
00:34:18,823 --> 00:34:20,381
That'll be just fine.
435
00:34:22,460 --> 00:34:24,394
Leave it be.
436
00:34:24,462 --> 00:34:28,496
Get your lazy behind out here
and put that trunk on the back.
437
00:34:28,966 --> 00:34:30,399
Oh, no, no. We've got it.
438
00:34:30,468 --> 00:34:31,799
It's very heavy.
439
00:34:31,869 --> 00:34:33,097
She don't mind.
440
00:34:33,171 --> 00:34:35,435
She's short and skinny,
441
00:34:35,506 --> 00:34:36,996
but she's strong.
442
00:34:37,975 --> 00:34:39,543
Her first baby
443
00:34:39,610 --> 00:34:41,703
come out sideways.
444
00:34:41,779 --> 00:34:44,043
She didn't scream or nothing.
445
00:34:44,115 --> 00:34:46,208
Isn't that something?
446
00:34:46,284 --> 00:34:47,979
You're a real trooper.
447
00:34:48,052 --> 00:34:50,646
We've got it. We've got it already. It's done.
448
00:34:54,325 --> 00:34:57,226
You know, Stubbville's
a little further than Wichita.
449
00:34:57,295 --> 00:34:58,922
How much further?
450
00:34:58,996 --> 00:35:00,190
30 miles.
451
00:35:01,566 --> 00:35:02,999
Maybe 40.
452
00:35:04,168 --> 00:35:06,659
No more than 45 though.
453
00:35:06,737 --> 00:35:08,271
Depending on which way he goes.
454
00:35:08,339 --> 00:35:11,537
If he goes the back roads,
it could be anywhere up to 70 miles.
455
00:35:15,079 --> 00:35:17,013
Give me the glove.
456
00:35:17,081 --> 00:35:20,141
Ow! Just nipped. Little part.
457
00:35:20,251 --> 00:35:22,719
Give him the goddamn glove!
458
00:35:22,787 --> 00:35:24,414
Are we there yet?
459
00:35:24,489 --> 00:35:27,424
No, a little way to go yet.
460
00:35:28,893 --> 00:35:30,827
Beautiful country though, isn't it?
461
00:35:30,895 --> 00:35:33,523
What do you figure the temperature is?
462
00:35:33,598 --> 00:35:34,530
One.
463
00:36:00,591 --> 00:36:01,558
Thanks.
464
00:36:06,197 --> 00:36:08,165
They didn't have two together.
465
00:36:08,232 --> 00:36:10,029
You got to be kidding me.
466
00:36:10,101 --> 00:36:11,568
Oh, I knew it.
467
00:36:11,636 --> 00:36:14,901
You know, the secretary was new,
and I explained it.
468
00:36:14,972 --> 00:36:16,735
Oh, gee... I'm sorry.
469
00:36:16,807 --> 00:36:18,331
Yeah, I thnik they're just full.
470
00:36:18,409 --> 00:36:20,543
Well, it's the holidays, I guess.
471
00:36:20,611 --> 00:36:23,244
Hey, we're lucky we got a ticket.
472
00:36:23,314 --> 00:36:26,545
Yeah. So, if I don't see you again.
473
00:36:26,617 --> 00:36:28,109
Well, I'll see you on the train.
474
00:36:28,317 --> 00:36:30,109
You want to get together
for a drink in the bar car?
475
00:36:30,188 --> 00:36:31,780
I'm going to get some sleep.
476
00:36:31,856 --> 00:36:33,346
- You sure?
- Yeah.
477
00:36:33,424 --> 00:36:36,154
Anyway, it's been interesting.
478
00:36:36,227 --> 00:36:39,158
That's the understatement of the year.
479
00:36:39,530 --> 00:36:41,464
And thanks for the ticket.
480
00:36:43,401 --> 00:36:45,735
Neal! I need your address.
481
00:36:45,803 --> 00:36:48,065
I got to send you the money
to pay you back for this ticket.
482
00:36:48,139 --> 00:36:49,606
Ticket's a gift.
483
00:36:49,674 --> 00:36:52,666
Oh, no, no, no, no. Come on now.
What's the address?
484
00:36:52,743 --> 00:36:54,142
Del, it's a gift.
485
00:36:54,412 --> 00:36:56,271
Happy holidays.
486
00:36:57,582 --> 00:36:59,311
Same to you.
487
00:37:14,131 --> 00:37:15,120
Hi.
488
00:37:16,567 --> 00:37:18,826
- Going home for Thanksgiving?
- Yeah.
489
00:37:18,903 --> 00:37:19,995
Me, too.
490
00:37:20,071 --> 00:37:22,130
We're just going to make it.
491
00:37:58,342 --> 00:37:59,842
What did you do here?
492
00:37:59,910 --> 00:38:02,105
Is there smoke?
Did you say you smell smoke?
493
00:38:27,505 --> 00:38:30,338
You walk a mile, a mile and-a-half
to the highway up here.
494
00:38:30,408 --> 00:38:33,343
The trucks will meet you and
they'll take you into Jefferson City.
495
00:39:21,292 --> 00:39:23,726
You're in a pretty lousy mood, huh?
496
00:39:23,794 --> 00:39:25,819
To say the least.
497
00:39:27,798 --> 00:39:30,289
You ever travel by bus before?
498
00:39:33,437 --> 00:39:36,429
Your mood's probably
not going to improve much.
499
00:39:59,397 --> 00:40:01,763
Neal, Neal. Check that out.
500
00:40:13,043 --> 00:40:15,339
Beats a movie on a plane, huh?
501
00:40:21,552 --> 00:40:24,020
Why don't you take a picture?
It'll last longer.
502
00:40:27,858 --> 00:40:29,485
You got busted.
503
00:40:32,663 --> 00:40:34,187
Oh, that was good.
504
00:40:37,868 --> 00:40:41,304
I guess this is probably as good
a time as any to tell you this.
505
00:40:41,372 --> 00:40:43,966
Our tickets are only good to St. Louis.
506
00:40:44,041 --> 00:40:47,240
St. Louis to Chi-town is booked
tighter than Tom Thumb's ass.
507
00:40:47,341 --> 00:40:48,740
Look, it's Thanksgiving.
508
00:40:56,554 --> 00:40:57,851
All right!
509
00:40:59,723 --> 00:41:01,816
That was fun, wasn't it?
510
00:41:01,892 --> 00:41:04,659
All right. Who knows a tune here?
Who wants to sing a tune?
511
00:41:04,709 --> 00:41:06,319
Who's got a song?
512
00:41:06,397 --> 00:41:09,830
- I got one...
- You got one? Neal Page has got one.
513
00:41:10,397 --> 00:41:12,930
# Three coins in a fountain #
514
00:41:13,697 --> 00:41:17,330
# Each one seeking hap... #
You know this? # ...seeking happiness #
515
00:41:18,311 --> 00:41:20,471
# Thrown by three hopeful lovers #
No?
516
00:41:23,111 --> 00:41:25,471
# Flintstones. Meet the Flintstones #
517
00:41:25,511 --> 00:41:29,001
# They're the modern stone age family #
518
00:41:29,311 --> 00:41:31,771
# From the town of Bedrock #
519
00:41:31,911 --> 00:41:35,471
# They're a page right out of history #
520
00:41:35,911 --> 00:41:38,471
# When you're with the Flintstones #
521
00:41:38,511 --> 00:41:40,971
# Have a yabba dabba doo time #
522
00:41:41,000 --> 00:41:42,471
# A dabba doo time #
523
00:41:42,511 --> 00:41:45,771
# You'll have a gay old time #
524
00:41:45,836 --> 00:41:47,235
Wilma!
525
00:41:47,471 --> 00:41:49,299
How do you do, ma'am?
My name's Del Griffith.
526
00:41:49,322 --> 00:41:51,039
I'm with the American
Light and Fixture Company,
527
00:41:51,359 --> 00:41:52,542
Jewelry division.
528
00:41:52,710 --> 00:41:55,178
And I've got the deal of a lifetime for you.
Do you have a minute?
529
00:41:55,546 --> 00:41:58,238
This is your Diane Sawyer
autographed earring.
530
00:41:58,715 --> 00:42:00,681
Do you ever watch Sixty Minutes?
531
00:42:02,786 --> 00:42:03,718
Thanks.
532
00:42:03,787 --> 00:42:06,483
This is Czechoslovakian ivory.
533
00:42:06,557 --> 00:42:09,082
That's it. It's $5.
534
00:42:09,159 --> 00:42:10,217
Great.
535
00:42:10,294 --> 00:42:13,730
This is your Walter Cronkite moon ring.
536
00:42:13,997 --> 00:42:15,094
Thank you.
537
00:42:15,165 --> 00:42:17,099
They are filled with helium,
538
00:42:17,167 --> 00:42:18,532
so they're very light.
539
00:42:18,602 --> 00:42:20,194
Thank you.
540
00:42:20,271 --> 00:42:22,865
This is an autographed
Darryl Strawberry earring.
541
00:42:23,240 --> 00:42:24,703
All right!
542
00:42:24,775 --> 00:42:26,766
These are very special earrings,
by the way.
543
00:42:26,844 --> 00:42:29,002
These were originally handcrafted
544
00:42:29,239 --> 00:42:30,913
for the Grand Wizard of China
545
00:42:30,981 --> 00:42:32,915
back in the fourth century.
546
00:42:32,983 --> 00:42:34,216
Now, these, of course, aren't the originals,
547
00:42:34,285 --> 00:42:37,245
but they are replicas.
Very good replicas, too.
548
00:42:37,321 --> 00:42:40,385
They're selling for $5 a pair. Two for $7.
549
00:42:50,401 --> 00:42:52,835
I'm Marti Page, and I'm thankful
550
00:42:52,903 --> 00:42:55,565
that my dad's coming home
for Thanksgiving.
551
00:43:02,413 --> 00:43:03,778
You know something?
552
00:43:03,847 --> 00:43:05,414
It makes you look a little older, too.
553
00:43:05,547 --> 00:43:06,714
I mean not just a little bit.
554
00:43:06,784 --> 00:43:10,049
You could pass for 18 or 19.
555
00:43:12,890 --> 00:43:14,524
Did you call the wife?
556
00:43:15,292 --> 00:43:16,951
No one was home.
557
00:43:17,127 --> 00:43:20,087
Probably at my daughter's
Thanksgiving pageant.
558
00:43:22,333 --> 00:43:24,126
You missed it.
559
00:43:24,535 --> 00:43:26,969
I'm sorry. Those...
560
00:43:27,037 --> 00:43:29,471
Those are the precious moments, too.
561
00:43:31,275 --> 00:43:33,505
They don't come back again.
562
00:43:36,577 --> 00:43:38,708
I've been spending too much time
away from home.
563
00:43:38,782 --> 00:43:41,000
I haven't been home in years.
564
00:43:41,785 --> 00:43:43,378
What, seriously?
565
00:43:43,854 --> 00:43:45,319
No, it's a figure of speech.
566
00:43:45,389 --> 00:43:46,822
You know, I'm on the road so much,
567
00:43:46,890 --> 00:43:48,824
it's like not being there.
568
00:43:48,892 --> 00:43:52,225
By the way, I called a good friend of mine
at Eastern Airlines.
569
00:43:52,296 --> 00:43:53,695
It doesn't look good.
570
00:43:53,764 --> 00:43:56,297
I know. I called all the airlines.
571
00:43:59,103 --> 00:44:04,000
Well, at least we're still sitting on
over 100 beans from my brilliant idea.
572
00:44:04,274 --> 00:44:06,208
You're a terrific salesman.
573
00:44:06,776 --> 00:44:08,574
You know...
574
00:44:08,646 --> 00:44:12,707
I've been thinking that
when we put our heads together,
575
00:44:12,783 --> 00:44:14,011
we really...
576
00:44:14,084 --> 00:44:15,915
we've really gotten nowhere.
577
00:44:15,986 --> 00:44:17,044
And...
578
00:44:17,121 --> 00:44:20,056
you know, I think I'm holding you up.
579
00:44:20,124 --> 00:44:23,923
Oh, no. Don't say that about yourself.
That's not true, Neal. It really isn't true.
580
00:44:23,994 --> 00:44:27,987
No, I really think we'll get to where
we're going a lot faster if...
581
00:44:28,065 --> 00:44:30,499
we were alone.
582
00:44:30,567 --> 00:44:31,625
Okay?
583
00:44:35,239 --> 00:44:36,297
Okay.
584
00:44:36,373 --> 00:44:37,670
I see.
585
00:44:44,714 --> 00:44:48,615
I think I'm just going to take care of this
and I think I'm going to get going.
586
00:44:48,686 --> 00:44:50,308
- I appreciate that.
- Yeah, that's fine.
587
00:44:50,320 --> 00:44:52,784
You know, it's just harder for two people
to travel. You know?
588
00:44:52,856 --> 00:44:54,823
Yeah. Yeah. Sure it is.
589
00:44:54,891 --> 00:44:55,324
And if you've got reservations...
590
00:44:55,392 --> 00:44:56,518
Yeah. Yeah, I know what you're saying.
591
00:44:56,593 --> 00:44:57,992
Thanks for the meal.
592
00:44:58,062 --> 00:44:59,495
Yeah, okay, that's all right.
593
00:44:59,563 --> 00:45:02,430
And I owe you some of this, too.
594
00:45:02,499 --> 00:45:03,932
No, no, no, no. Del.
595
00:45:04,001 --> 00:45:05,434
- Del, I told you it was a gift.
- This is your cut, all right?
596
00:45:05,502 --> 00:45:06,935
- I'm not taking your money.
- Take the money.
597
00:45:07,004 --> 00:45:08,338
- Buy your kids a chocolate turkey or something.
- No, no, you get your kids something.
598
00:45:08,354 --> 00:45:10,438
- You take it. Take it. Take it.
- I don't want the money, okay?
599
00:45:10,506 --> 00:45:12,031
- I don't need anything for my kids.
- I'm just going to leave it there.
600
00:45:12,109 --> 00:45:13,733
Then leave it. If you want to leave it, fine.
601
00:45:13,751 --> 00:45:15,406
That's okay. I'm done, okay?
602
00:45:15,479 --> 00:45:18,573
I've got to get going now,
so if you'll excuse me...
603
00:45:18,649 --> 00:45:21,015
I got things to do.
604
00:45:22,086 --> 00:45:23,280
So...
605
00:45:24,354 --> 00:45:27,889
Good luck to you and
I hope you get home soon.
606
00:45:27,957 --> 00:45:28,722
I'll see you.
607
00:45:28,792 --> 00:45:30,123
Yeah, sure you will.
608
00:45:41,304 --> 00:45:44,638
It's a white Lincoln town car, space V-5.
609
00:46:01,458 --> 00:46:03,085
V-5
610
00:46:03,160 --> 00:46:04,718
V-5.
611
00:46:06,930 --> 00:46:08,659
V-5.
612
00:46:22,279 --> 00:46:23,371
Hey! Hey!
613
00:46:23,447 --> 00:46:25,142
Hey! Hey!
614
00:46:27,417 --> 00:46:30,011
Hey! Hey! Hey!
615
00:46:30,087 --> 00:46:31,520
Hey, the car's not there!
616
00:46:31,588 --> 00:46:34,557
I need a ride back!
617
00:46:41,298 --> 00:46:42,356
You...
618
00:46:43,467 --> 00:46:44,661
God!
619
00:46:45,669 --> 00:46:47,102
Goddamn it!
620
00:46:47,171 --> 00:46:48,604
Goddamn it!
621
00:46:51,171 --> 00:46:53,004
You're messing with the wrong guy!
622
00:47:39,271 --> 00:47:41,004
You're messing with the wrong guy!
623
00:48:00,910 --> 00:48:03,102
Oh, gee, Marie, you're a stitch.
624
00:48:04,514 --> 00:48:06,647
No, mom's going to do the turkey.
625
00:48:06,716 --> 00:48:08,749
Yeah, dad wants ambrosia,
626
00:48:08,817 --> 00:48:11,152
so I guess we're going to get
those miniature marshmallows.
627
00:48:11,220 --> 00:48:13,655
And I'll do the crescent rolls,
and you do the cranberries.
628
00:48:13,724 --> 00:48:15,555
You know I can't cook.
629
00:48:21,265 --> 00:48:23,062
Yeah, Well, I'll see you tomorrow then.
630
00:48:23,133 --> 00:48:24,361
Gobble gobble.
631
00:48:27,504 --> 00:48:28,766
Oh, bye-bye.
632
00:48:37,012 --> 00:48:38,648
Welcome to Marathon. May I help you?
633
00:48:39,215 --> 00:48:40,774
Yes.
634
00:48:40,999 --> 00:48:43,342
How may I help you?
635
00:48:43,420 --> 00:48:47,481
You can start by wiping
that fucking dumb-ass smile
636
00:48:47,557 --> 00:48:50,754
off your rosy fucking cheeks.
637
00:48:50,827 --> 00:48:53,227
Then you can give me
a fucking automobile.
638
00:48:53,297 --> 00:48:54,730
A fucking Datsun,
639
00:48:54,798 --> 00:48:56,231
a fucking Toyota,
640
00:48:56,300 --> 00:48:56,928
a fucking Mustang,
641
00:48:56,950 --> 00:48:57,578
a fucking Buick.
642
00:48:57,601 --> 00:48:59,933
Four fucking wheels and a seat.
643
00:49:00,003 --> 00:49:03,029
I really don't care for the way
you're speaking to me.
644
00:49:03,106 --> 00:49:05,267
And I really don't care for the way
645
00:49:05,342 --> 00:49:08,072
your company left me
in the middle of fucking nowhere
646
00:49:08,145 --> 00:49:11,444
with fucking keys to a fucking car
that isn't fucking there.
647
00:49:11,515 --> 00:49:15,417
And I really didn't care to fucking walk
down a fucking highway
648
00:49:15,485 --> 00:49:17,714
and across a fucking runway
649
00:49:17,787 --> 00:49:21,621
to get back here to have you smile
at my fucking face.
650
00:49:21,692 --> 00:49:25,526
I want a fucking car
651
00:49:25,595 --> 00:49:28,826
right fucking now.
652
00:49:32,302 --> 00:49:34,702
May I see your rental agreement?
653
00:49:34,771 --> 00:49:37,365
I threw it away.
654
00:49:37,441 --> 00:49:40,137
Oh, boy.
655
00:49:41,211 --> 00:49:43,042
Oh, boy, what?
656
00:49:43,113 --> 00:49:45,638
You're fucked.
657
00:50:04,069 --> 00:50:05,805
You're messing with the wrong guy!
658
00:50:05,869 --> 00:50:09,305
Okay, 86, wake up.
You're going to block the line.
659
00:50:09,573 --> 00:50:12,171
- Yeah, where you going?
- Chicago.
660
00:50:12,242 --> 00:50:15,174
- Chicago?
- Chicago.
661
00:50:15,244 --> 00:50:16,474
You know you're in St. Louis?
662
00:50:16,546 --> 00:50:18,878
Yes, I do.
663
00:50:19,950 --> 00:50:23,515
Why don't you try the airlines? They are
a lot faster and you get a free meal.
664
00:50:23,587 --> 00:50:27,422
If I wanted a joke, I'd follow you into
the john and watch you take a leak.
665
00:50:29,226 --> 00:50:30,390
Now, are you going to help me
666
00:50:30,426 --> 00:50:33,390
or are you going to stand there
like a slab of meat with mittens.
667
00:50:46,943 --> 00:50:48,376
What are you doing?
668
00:50:48,445 --> 00:50:51,000
I almost crushed your head like a melon.
669
00:50:52,416 --> 00:50:53,383
Del?
670
00:50:53,450 --> 00:50:54,917
Get your car out of here!
671
00:50:54,985 --> 00:50:56,850
Just a minute, okay?
672
00:50:56,920 --> 00:50:58,581
Get it out of here!
673
00:51:00,090 --> 00:51:01,723
What is your problem?
674
00:51:01,791 --> 00:51:04,116
You insensitive asshole.
675
00:51:04,194 --> 00:51:06,926
Can't you see we've got
an injured man down on the street?
676
00:51:06,997 --> 00:51:08,897
Now, I'll move my car,
677
00:51:08,965 --> 00:51:10,865
but I want you help him up.
678
00:51:10,934 --> 00:51:12,000
No!
679
00:51:12,069 --> 00:51:13,293
My pleasure.
680
00:51:28,418 --> 00:51:31,854
You know, I had a feeling that
when we parted ways,
681
00:51:31,922 --> 00:51:34,686
somehow, someday,
our paths would cross again.
682
00:51:35,759 --> 00:51:37,090
Are you all right?
683
00:51:39,160 --> 00:51:42,162
I've never seen a guy get picked up
by his testicles before.
684
00:51:42,231 --> 00:51:44,962
Lucky thing for you that cop
passed by when he did.
685
00:51:45,035 --> 00:51:48,199
Otherwise, you'd be lifting
your schnutz to tie your shoes.
686
00:51:49,672 --> 00:51:51,698
I'm sorry. That's terrible.
687
00:51:51,775 --> 00:51:54,505
Do you have any idea
how glad I am I didn't kill you?
688
00:51:54,578 --> 00:51:57,376
Do you have any idea
how glad I'd be if you had?
689
00:51:57,447 --> 00:51:59,574
Oh, come on, pal. You don't mean that.
690
00:51:59,649 --> 00:52:02,116
Remember what I said
about going with the flow?
691
00:52:02,186 --> 00:52:05,000
How I am supposed to go with the flow
when the rental car agency
692
00:52:05,049 --> 00:52:08,000
leaves me in a 100-acre parking-lot
with keys to a car that isn't there,
693
00:52:08,025 --> 00:52:12,258
and then I have to hike 3 miles back
to find out they don't have any more cars?
694
00:52:13,329 --> 00:52:15,093
I got a car, no sweat at all.
695
00:52:16,165 --> 00:52:18,265
Well, Del, you're a charmed man.
696
00:52:18,307 --> 00:52:20,593
- Nope.
- Oh, I know.
697
00:52:20,670 --> 00:52:22,504
You just go with the flow.
698
00:52:22,573 --> 00:52:25,339
Like a twig on the shoulders
of a mighty stream.
699
00:53:01,677 --> 00:53:03,840
Would you please stop
doing that with the seat?
700
00:53:03,914 --> 00:53:05,711
Once you start screwing around
with these damn things,
701
00:53:05,782 --> 00:53:07,113
you can never get comfortable.
702
00:53:07,184 --> 00:53:08,742
Then quit screwing around with it.
703
00:53:08,818 --> 00:53:10,746
I got to get comfortable.
704
00:53:11,020 --> 00:53:12,315
Do you have a bad back?
705
00:53:13,089 --> 00:53:14,788
Well, I do and it hurts like a bugger.
706
00:53:14,857 --> 00:53:16,587
There's only a couple good positions.
707
00:53:16,660 --> 00:53:18,218
You're going to break it.
708
00:53:19,963 --> 00:53:21,062
Done.
709
00:53:22,499 --> 00:53:23,625
Ah, lovely.
710
00:53:24,701 --> 00:53:25,998
Lovely, lovely.
711
00:53:32,742 --> 00:53:34,437
Oh, damn it.
712
00:53:34,511 --> 00:53:35,739
What now?
713
00:53:35,812 --> 00:53:37,746
I got the seat right where I want it.
714
00:53:37,814 --> 00:53:39,748
I can't reach my feet to get my shoes off.
715
00:53:39,816 --> 00:53:42,250
That's just fine. Leave your shoes on.
716
00:53:42,319 --> 00:53:44,116
I can't relax if I got my shoes on.
717
00:53:44,187 --> 00:53:47,850
I don't care to breathe your foot odor.
Leave the shoes on!
718
00:53:47,924 --> 00:53:51,724
Gee, it must be swell to be
so perfect and odor-free.
719
00:53:51,795 --> 00:53:53,729
You know, there's plenty of things
about you that bother me,
720
00:53:53,797 --> 00:53:56,000
but I'm decent enough not to bring them up.
721
00:53:56,027 --> 00:53:57,332
- Really, really?
- That's right, yeah.
722
00:53:57,360 --> 00:53:58,529
What do I do that bothers you?
723
00:53:58,602 --> 00:53:59,970
- I'm just curious.
- Well, there's lots of things that you do.
724
00:53:59,993 --> 00:54:02,092
- Name one. Why don't you name one?
- There's quite a few things.
725
00:54:02,121 --> 00:54:03,166
- You want me to name one?
- Yeah.
726
00:54:03,240 --> 00:54:04,400
Fine...
727
00:54:05,575 --> 00:54:08,339
You play with your balls a lot.
728
00:54:12,382 --> 00:54:15,749
I do not play with my balls.
729
00:54:16,819 --> 00:54:21,310
Larry Bird doesn't do as much ball
handling in one night as you do in an hour.
730
00:54:21,424 --> 00:54:22,692
Are you trying to start a fight?
731
00:54:22,759 --> 00:54:24,522
No, I'm simply stating a fact, that's all.
732
00:54:24,594 --> 00:54:26,289
You fidget with your nuts a lot.
733
00:54:26,363 --> 00:54:27,625
You know what would make me happy?
734
00:54:27,697 --> 00:54:29,927
Another couple of balls
and an extra set of fingers?
735
00:54:31,935 --> 00:54:33,000
Oh, that's humor.
736
00:54:33,036 --> 00:54:35,569
Oh, that's real humor.
737
00:54:35,638 --> 00:54:37,873
What would make be happy is
if you give your mouth a rest.
738
00:54:38,341 --> 00:54:39,873
My pleasure.
739
00:54:39,942 --> 00:54:41,876
- I'd like a little silence when I drive.
- No problem.
740
00:54:41,945 --> 00:54:43,946
- Thank you very much.
- You're welcome.
741
00:54:50,320 --> 00:54:51,553
You broke the seat.
742
00:54:51,621 --> 00:54:54,788
You broke the goddamn seat.
I don't believe it.
743
00:54:55,358 --> 00:54:57,052
It wasn't broken when I got out.
744
00:54:57,627 --> 00:54:59,058
You messed around with it
till you broke it.
745
00:54:59,129 --> 00:55:01,122
How can you break a car seat.
It's impossible.
746
00:55:01,198 --> 00:55:02,458
What do you mean it's impossible?
747
00:55:02,532 --> 00:55:03,999
- You want to drive?
- No I don't.
748
00:55:04,067 --> 00:55:06,201
Why did you do this?
749
00:55:08,605 --> 00:55:11,267
Look, I'm not going to be held
responsible for faulty engineering.
750
00:55:11,341 --> 00:55:14,902
Oh, boy, this is comfortable.
This is really comfortable.
751
00:55:16,313 --> 00:55:19,180
I don't want to argue, all right?
Let's not fight.
752
00:55:19,249 --> 00:55:20,682
All right, all right.
753
00:55:21,750 --> 00:55:23,685
Now, I'm gonna go to sleep. All right.
754
00:55:25,753 --> 00:55:28,690
I'm putting my wallet in the glove
compartment. Don't let me forget it.
755
00:55:28,758 --> 00:55:29,747
All right.
756
00:56:55,512 --> 00:56:57,546
That was Ray Charles doing
The Mess Around.
757
00:56:57,614 --> 00:57:00,000
Looking outside,
the weather's beginning to clear up now.
758
00:57:00,016 --> 00:57:01,547
I hope you're enjoying your evening with us.
759
00:57:01,558 --> 00:57:03,750
We're coming up half past the hour...
760
00:57:45,761 --> 00:57:46,953
Oh, come on.
761
00:57:52,968 --> 00:57:53,995
Right.
762
00:58:07,851 --> 00:58:08,875
Oh, shit!
763
00:58:26,836 --> 00:58:27,963
Okay.
764
00:58:28,037 --> 00:58:31,268
Think it out. Just relax.
765
00:58:31,341 --> 00:58:33,866
Let go! Let go!
766
00:59:01,704 --> 00:59:03,365
What's happening?
767
00:59:04,439 --> 00:59:06,602
Oh, we almost hit a deer, that's all.
768
00:59:07,700 --> 00:59:09,236
Are you all right?
769
00:59:10,312 --> 00:59:12,406
Yes, I'm fine. Yes, I'm fine.
770
00:59:12,482 --> 00:59:15,174
It's getting pretty hot in here.
You ought to take your parka off.
771
00:59:15,252 --> 00:59:17,281
Yes. Yes, I will.
772
00:59:47,716 --> 00:59:50,583
Holy shit! Look at that guy
on the wrong side of the highway!
773
00:59:50,602 --> 00:59:52,286
He's going to kill somebody!
774
00:59:52,355 --> 00:59:53,652
Oh, my God!
775
00:59:54,423 --> 00:59:55,486
Hey!
776
00:59:56,793 --> 00:59:57,782
Hey!
777
01:00:00,763 --> 01:00:02,797
Hey, what's going on?
778
01:00:02,865 --> 01:00:04,890
Some joker wants to race.
779
01:00:06,202 --> 01:00:07,260
Turn around!
780
01:00:07,337 --> 01:00:09,897
Don't race. It's ridiculous.
781
01:00:09,973 --> 01:00:12,601
All right, come on. Let's go. Let's go.
782
01:00:12,675 --> 01:00:14,370
Put your window down!
783
01:00:14,444 --> 01:00:15,968
He wants something.
784
01:00:16,545 --> 01:00:17,945
He's probably drunk.
785
01:00:18,014 --> 01:00:20,482
You're going the wrong way!
786
01:00:20,550 --> 01:00:21,676
What?
787
01:00:21,751 --> 01:00:24,515
- You're going the wrong way!
- You're going the wrong way!
788
01:00:26,089 --> 01:00:28,819
He says we're going the wrong way.
789
01:00:28,891 --> 01:00:30,324
Oh, he's drunk.
790
01:00:30,393 --> 01:00:32,793
How would he know where we're going?
791
01:00:32,862 --> 01:00:35,490
Yeah, how would he know?
792
01:00:35,565 --> 01:00:37,829
Thank you. Thanks a lot.
793
01:00:37,900 --> 01:00:39,333
Terrific.
794
01:00:39,402 --> 01:00:40,334
Thank you.
795
01:00:41,738 --> 01:00:43,103
What a moron.
796
01:00:45,041 --> 01:00:47,669
You're going in the wrong direction!
797
01:00:52,181 --> 01:00:55,309
- You're going to kill somebody!
- You're going to kill somebody!
798
01:01:03,593 --> 01:01:05,754
You're going the wrong way!
799
01:01:10,466 --> 01:01:11,865
- Truck. Truck. Truck.
- What?
800
01:01:11,934 --> 01:01:12,901
What?!
801
01:02:15,931 --> 01:02:17,624
Well, this isn't so bad.
802
01:02:19,700 --> 01:02:21,136
I thought it would be a lot worse than this.
803
01:02:21,204 --> 01:02:24,435
They'll be able to buff this out no problem.
804
01:02:24,507 --> 01:02:25,974
Oh, yeah.
805
01:02:33,048 --> 01:02:35,108
I mean, that was close.
806
01:02:35,184 --> 01:02:38,513
We can laugh about it now.
We're all right, you know.
807
01:02:38,888 --> 01:02:41,482
The whole...
808
01:02:42,857 --> 01:02:45,687
Maybe we should just get
my stuff off the road, huh?
809
01:02:45,762 --> 01:02:47,753
What do you think? Yeah.
810
01:02:47,830 --> 01:02:49,764
Yeah, that's a good idea.
811
01:02:51,667 --> 01:02:53,567
Oh, my back!
812
01:02:56,005 --> 01:02:57,063
God.
813
01:03:17,527 --> 01:03:19,620
Come on. Here we go.
814
01:03:20,495 --> 01:03:21,458
Thanks.
815
01:03:21,931 --> 01:03:24,466
Set it down for a second.
816
01:03:32,540 --> 01:03:33,600
What a night.
817
01:04:26,696 --> 01:04:27,663
What?
818
01:04:28,865 --> 01:04:30,127
What?
819
01:04:30,399 --> 01:04:33,635
You finally did it to yourself.
820
01:04:33,703 --> 01:04:34,795
Huh?
821
01:04:38,374 --> 01:04:41,000
I mean, good luck turning the car in.
822
01:04:41,377 --> 01:04:44,513
They're going to be happy
as pigs in shit to see you.
823
01:04:54,857 --> 01:04:58,655
How could you rent the thing anyway
without a credit card?
824
01:04:59,528 --> 01:05:01,822
I mean you couldn't. How could you do it?
825
01:05:01,898 --> 01:05:06,333
I gave this gal behind the counter
a set of shower curtain rings.
826
01:05:14,644 --> 01:05:17,509
You can't rent a car
with shower curtain rings, Del.
827
01:05:28,090 --> 01:05:29,224
Well...
828
01:05:31,092 --> 01:05:32,526
somehow your...
829
01:05:32,795 --> 01:05:36,231
diner's club card wound up in my wallet,
830
01:05:36,298 --> 01:05:38,632
and I just...
831
01:05:38,601 --> 01:05:40,701
- You stole it!
- Not exactly.
832
01:05:40,720 --> 01:05:42,403
- You stole my card!
- No, I swear on my life I didn't.
833
01:05:42,422 --> 01:05:43,334
- I know you stole it.
834
01:05:43,356 --> 01:05:44,373
- You stole my card...
- I did not steal your card!
835
01:05:44,396 --> 01:05:45,773
- ...and then you rented a car,
- I didn't!
836
01:05:45,816 --> 01:05:47,573
- ...and then you burned it up!
- I did not!
837
01:05:47,610 --> 01:05:49,976
- I found it in my wallet!
- I knew you stole it.
838
01:05:50,046 --> 01:05:51,410
I thought you put it there.
839
01:05:52,081 --> 01:05:53,739
Why would I put it there?
840
01:05:54,016 --> 01:05:55,347
Kindness?
841
01:05:55,418 --> 01:05:57,750
Kindness?
842
01:05:57,820 --> 01:05:59,151
Kindness?
843
01:05:59,221 --> 01:06:01,054
You stole it!
844
01:06:01,123 --> 01:06:02,756
He stole it!
845
01:06:02,824 --> 01:06:06,024
No, I didn't. No, I didn't.
I was going to send it back to you
846
01:06:06,095 --> 01:06:09,087
with whatever the rental car
charge was, plus interest.
847
01:06:09,165 --> 01:06:11,565
But you didn't give me your address.
What was I supposed to do?
848
01:06:11,634 --> 01:06:12,999
You just ditched me.
849
01:06:13,069 --> 01:06:15,503
I had no money, I had no cards,
I had nothing.
850
01:06:15,571 --> 01:06:16,731
Give it back!
851
01:06:16,806 --> 01:06:17,738
I can't!
852
01:06:19,875 --> 01:06:20,807
Why not?
853
01:06:20,876 --> 01:06:21,843
Because!
854
01:06:23,245 --> 01:06:24,337
Because why?
855
01:06:24,413 --> 01:06:26,847
Because when we stopped to gas up,
856
01:06:26,916 --> 01:06:29,851
I put the card back in your wallet.
857
01:06:41,931 --> 01:06:43,831
Are you mad at me?
858
01:06:59,815 --> 01:07:04,187
You know, you could've killed me,
slugging me in the gut when I wasn't ready.
859
01:07:05,254 --> 01:07:07,188
That's how Houdini died, you know.
860
01:07:16,732 --> 01:07:18,400
One good thing about it,
861
01:07:18,434 --> 01:07:21,470
with all this fresh air,
we're going to sleep like babies.
862
01:07:22,238 --> 01:07:24,672
Neal? Hey, hey, Neal, wait up.
863
01:07:27,009 --> 01:07:28,499
I need one room.
864
01:07:29,077 --> 01:07:31,912
If you're pissed at me,
maybe we should get separate rooms.
865
01:07:31,980 --> 01:07:33,013
You get your own room.
866
01:07:33,082 --> 01:07:35,516
I'll need a major credit card.
867
01:07:35,684 --> 01:07:37,848
Right. Right.
868
01:07:40,389 --> 01:07:42,050
I have...
869
01:07:43,059 --> 01:07:44,617
Diner's...
870
01:07:46,228 --> 01:07:47,160
Visa...
871
01:07:49,098 --> 01:07:50,690
and a gasoline card.
872
01:07:54,303 --> 01:07:57,101
These aren't credit cards.
873
01:07:57,573 --> 01:08:00,233
All right, I'll pay cash. Cash.
874
01:08:00,309 --> 01:08:01,991
$42.50.
875
01:08:09,618 --> 01:08:12,746
How about... $17?
876
01:08:14,090 --> 01:08:15,819
I can't do that.
877
01:08:15,891 --> 01:08:16,949
Please.
878
01:08:17,226 --> 01:08:18,994
Have mercy.
879
01:08:20,061 --> 01:08:23,694
I've been wearing the same underwear
since Tuesday.
880
01:08:23,766 --> 01:08:25,597
I can vouch for that.
881
01:08:28,237 --> 01:08:31,172
I don't... I don't... I don't own the place.
882
01:08:37,746 --> 01:08:41,512
$17 and a hell of a nice watch.
883
01:08:57,366 --> 01:08:59,025
Would you like a room?
884
01:09:05,608 --> 01:09:07,974
I got a slight problem here.
885
01:09:08,043 --> 01:09:10,307
I don't have the $42.50.
886
01:09:10,579 --> 01:09:13,815
You have $17 and a good watch?
887
01:09:14,883 --> 01:09:16,852
No, I don't. I have...
888
01:09:20,055 --> 01:09:22,819
I have $2.00 and...
889
01:09:25,394 --> 01:09:26,986
and a Casio.
890
01:09:31,333 --> 01:09:34,359
I'm going to have to say goodnight.
891
01:10:22,218 --> 01:10:23,480
Well, Marie...
892
01:10:23,952 --> 01:10:27,488
Once again, my dear,
you were as right as rain.
893
01:10:28,891 --> 01:10:30,825
I am, without a doubt,
894
01:10:30,893 --> 01:10:35,129
the biggest pain in the butt
that ever came down the pike.
895
01:10:37,066 --> 01:10:40,031
I meet someone whose
company I really enjoy,
896
01:10:40,502 --> 01:10:42,336
and what do I do?
897
01:10:43,572 --> 01:10:45,005
I go overboard.
898
01:10:45,074 --> 01:10:47,008
I smother the poor soul.
899
01:10:47,276 --> 01:10:50,445
I cause him more trouble
than he has a right to.
900
01:10:52,881 --> 01:10:55,475
God, I got a big mouth.
901
01:11:01,523 --> 01:11:03,958
When am I ever going to wake up?
902
01:11:23,512 --> 01:11:26,670
I wish you were here with me right now.
903
01:11:30,552 --> 01:11:32,611
But I guess...
904
01:11:32,688 --> 01:11:34,553
that's not going to happen.
905
01:11:36,392 --> 01:11:38,053
Not now, anyway.
906
01:11:40,595 --> 01:11:44,032
What did I do to get hooked up
with this guy?
907
01:12:02,751 --> 01:12:05,286
You're going to freeze to death out there.
908
01:12:12,127 --> 01:12:13,458
How's your drink?
909
01:12:13,529 --> 01:12:14,621
Good.
910
01:12:16,532 --> 01:12:17,965
Go for another one?
911
01:12:18,033 --> 01:12:19,466
Where've you been?
912
01:12:19,535 --> 01:12:20,968
You've been to Italy?
913
01:12:21,036 --> 01:12:22,469
You had amaretto?
914
01:12:22,538 --> 01:12:24,473
I have amaretto, and this is a gin.
915
01:12:24,538 --> 01:12:25,473
Oh, gin.
916
01:12:25,541 --> 01:12:27,475
What is that? Is that a tequila there?
917
01:12:27,743 --> 01:12:29,477
A little Mexican trip.
918
01:12:29,545 --> 01:12:30,477
Tequila?
919
01:12:30,546 --> 01:12:32,343
Here you go. Coming up.
920
01:12:32,814 --> 01:12:34,882
Is this a good combo or what?
921
01:12:35,050 --> 01:12:37,075
No, probably not.
922
01:12:37,452 --> 01:12:42,017
Me, I'm going back to Jamaica.
923
01:12:42,391 --> 01:12:43,585
Jamaica, man.
924
01:12:43,659 --> 01:12:46,594
Go to Jamaica. Have some rum, man.
925
01:12:46,662 --> 01:12:47,788
Dig it.
926
01:12:47,863 --> 01:12:50,024
Iree, iree, man.
927
01:12:52,601 --> 01:12:54,535
Oh, shit.
928
01:12:58,006 --> 01:13:00,041
You know, when I'm dead and buried,
929
01:13:00,109 --> 01:13:03,044
all I'm going to have around
to prove that I was here
930
01:13:03,112 --> 01:13:06,547
was some shower curtain rings
that didn't fall down.
931
01:13:06,615 --> 01:13:08,173
Great legacy, huh?
932
01:13:08,550 --> 01:13:10,047
At the very least,
933
01:13:10,119 --> 01:13:12,053
at the absolute minimum,
934
01:13:12,121 --> 01:13:16,081
you've got a woman you love
to grow old with, right?
935
01:13:17,859 --> 01:13:20,021
You love her, don't you?
936
01:13:25,434 --> 01:13:29,269
Love is not a big enough word.
937
01:13:29,737 --> 01:13:33,699
It's not a big enough word
for how I feel about my wife.
938
01:13:33,776 --> 01:13:35,266
To the wives.
939
01:13:35,344 --> 01:13:36,606
To the wives!
940
01:13:46,155 --> 01:13:49,522
Well, let me just close this conversation
941
01:13:49,591 --> 01:13:52,526
by saying you are one unique individual.
942
01:13:54,596 --> 01:13:56,029
What is unique?
943
01:13:56,198 --> 01:13:58,532
Latin for asshole?
944
01:13:58,600 --> 01:14:01,535
Grab those. I'm going to kick them off.
945
01:14:03,972 --> 01:14:08,033
Well, I'll tell you. As much trouble
as I've had on this little journey,
946
01:14:08,110 --> 01:14:11,146
I'm sure one day I'm going
to look back and laugh.
947
01:14:11,613 --> 01:14:13,012
You think so?
948
01:14:13,381 --> 01:14:15,549
Oh, I'm laughing already.
949
01:14:15,617 --> 01:14:17,149
Oh, God.
950
01:14:17,178 --> 01:14:19,178
Oh, when that car blew up.
951
01:14:19,554 --> 01:14:21,752
Was that seat hot or what?
952
01:14:21,793 --> 01:14:24,786
I feel like a big whopper.
953
01:14:24,860 --> 01:14:27,556
Turn me over. I'm done on this side.
954
01:14:27,629 --> 01:14:30,164
I'm afraid to look at my ass, you know.
955
01:14:30,232 --> 01:14:33,168
I'm going to have those griddle marks
on my ass.
956
01:14:36,406 --> 01:14:37,570
What is that?
957
01:14:37,906 --> 01:14:40,070
Potato chips.
958
01:14:42,144 --> 01:14:43,577
They're everywhere!
959
01:14:47,282 --> 01:14:49,250
Why do I feel like I am in summer camp?
960
01:15:05,167 --> 01:15:08,102
Now how the hell does this thing turn off?
961
01:15:13,375 --> 01:15:14,603
You all set?
962
01:15:14,676 --> 01:15:16,109
Just a minute.
963
01:15:16,178 --> 01:15:18,112
Give it a good push now.
964
01:15:18,180 --> 01:15:20,113
- All right.
- All right.
965
01:15:20,182 --> 01:15:21,615
Oh, geez.
966
01:15:26,686 --> 01:15:28,656
- Push! Put some oomph into it!
- I am! I am!
967
01:15:28,724 --> 01:15:30,248
Push, for Christ sake!
968
01:15:31,493 --> 01:15:33,120
I think we have to rock it a bit.
969
01:15:33,195 --> 01:15:34,753
All right. Okay.
970
01:15:34,990 --> 01:15:37,697
Up and down. Here we go. Ready?
971
01:15:37,766 --> 01:15:38,755
Yeah.
972
01:15:38,834 --> 01:15:40,131
Here we go.
973
01:15:40,202 --> 01:15:41,328
Reverse!
974
01:15:57,786 --> 01:15:58,878
Get in!
975
01:16:03,792 --> 01:16:04,952
Go!
976
01:16:21,392 --> 01:16:25,152
# Blue moon of Kentucky
keep on shining #
977
01:16:25,492 --> 01:16:29,352
# Shine on the one that's gone
and proved untrue #
978
01:16:29,592 --> 01:16:33,752
# Blue moon of Kentucky
keep on shining #
979
01:16:33,992 --> 01:16:37,352
# Shine on the one that's gone
and left me blue #
980
01:16:37,492 --> 01:16:42,352
# It was on a moonlit night
The stars were shining bright #
981
01:16:42,492 --> 01:16:46,552
# They whispered from on high
Your love has said good-bye #
982
01:16:46,792 --> 01:16:50,552
# Blue moon of Kentucky
keep on shining #
983
01:17:03,785 --> 01:17:06,419
Oh, great. Great. A cop.
984
01:17:06,488 --> 01:17:07,420
Watch it!
985
01:17:08,789 --> 01:17:10,223
How fast are you going?
986
01:17:10,291 --> 01:17:12,725
I can't tell. The speedometer's melted.
987
01:17:12,793 --> 01:17:13,717
Pull over.
988
01:17:13,795 --> 01:17:15,226
Top of the morning, officer.
989
01:17:15,297 --> 01:17:16,229
Hi.
990
01:17:16,298 --> 01:17:19,000
Is there something I can help you with?
991
01:17:19,301 --> 01:17:21,235
What the hell are you driving?
992
01:17:21,303 --> 01:17:24,534
We had a small fire last night,
but we caught in the nick of time.
993
01:17:24,606 --> 01:17:28,000
You have any idea how fast
you were going?
994
01:17:28,050 --> 01:17:29,743
Funnily enough, I was just talking
to my friend about that.
995
01:17:29,811 --> 01:17:30,947
Our speedometer's melted
996
01:17:30,991 --> 01:17:33,247
and as a result it's very hard to say
with any degree of accuracy
997
01:17:33,315 --> 01:17:36,079
exactly how fast we were going.
998
01:17:36,151 --> 01:17:38,210
78 miles an hour.
999
01:17:39,388 --> 01:17:40,821
78, huh?
1000
01:17:40,989 --> 01:17:43,824
Well, yeah. I can buy that. Sure. I guess.
1001
01:17:43,892 --> 01:17:45,826
You know, you'd know better than us.
1002
01:17:45,894 --> 01:17:47,759
Especially since we've got
a melted speedometer.
1003
01:17:47,829 --> 01:17:51,265
Do you feel this vehicle is
safe for highway travel?
1004
01:17:51,333 --> 01:17:52,766
Yes, I do.
1005
01:17:52,834 --> 01:17:54,467
Yes, I really do. I believe that...
1006
01:17:54,536 --> 01:17:57,897
I know it's not pretty to look at,
but it'll get you where you want to go.
1007
01:17:57,973 --> 01:17:59,770
You got no outside mirror.
1008
01:17:59,841 --> 01:18:00,899
No, we lost that.
1009
01:18:00,976 --> 01:18:02,573
You have no functioning gauges.
1010
01:18:02,644 --> 01:18:04,000
No, not a one.
1011
01:18:04,613 --> 01:18:06,774
However, the radio still works.
1012
01:18:06,848 --> 01:18:08,782
Funny as that may seem,
with all this mess,
1013
01:18:08,850 --> 01:18:10,686
that the radio is the only thing
that's really working good.
1014
01:18:10,704 --> 01:18:13,287
And it's clear as a bell. Don't ask me how.
1015
01:18:15,891 --> 01:18:18,052
I can't let you go ahead in this vehicle.
1016
01:18:18,126 --> 01:18:19,286
Can't what?
1017
01:18:19,361 --> 01:18:21,095
No. It's not fit for the road.
1018
01:18:21,263 --> 01:18:22,497
The vehicle will be impounded
1019
01:18:22,515 --> 01:18:25,499
until such time as it can be made safe
for travel on state highway.
1020
01:18:25,768 --> 01:18:29,303
Okay, officer, I admit it. I broke the law.
1021
01:18:29,371 --> 01:18:31,805
And for that I'm really sorry.
I am and it'll never happen again.
1022
01:18:31,873 --> 01:18:35,410
You got me there and I won't argue
with you one iota, I swear.
1023
01:18:35,678 --> 01:18:37,345
However...
1024
01:18:37,912 --> 01:18:39,512
If you impound our car,
1025
01:18:39,681 --> 01:18:43,851
I'm going be unable to get my friend here
home in time for his Thanksgiving dinner.
1026
01:19:14,349 --> 01:19:16,943
Well, our ship has come in.
1027
01:19:22,891 --> 01:19:25,116
It's free and it's nonstop.
1028
01:19:25,193 --> 01:19:27,187
I said I'was going to get you home.
1029
01:19:27,223 --> 01:19:29,531
I don't care, just so the heater's working.
1030
01:19:29,898 --> 01:19:34,000
The driver's a little freaky
about people riding up in his cab.
1031
01:19:34,636 --> 01:19:36,297
So, we can't sit there.
1032
01:19:36,371 --> 01:19:39,238
Well, if we can't sit up there,
where are we supposed to ride?
1033
01:19:41,376 --> 01:19:42,809
Beats walking, huh?
1034
01:19:44,379 --> 01:19:47,314
You know, you're going to be in Chicago in...
1035
01:19:47,382 --> 01:19:50,249
less than three hours, around there,
1036
01:19:50,318 --> 01:19:52,252
if we don't hit traffic.
1037
01:19:52,320 --> 01:19:55,756
And I don't think we should,
since it's Thanksgiving.
1038
01:19:56,825 --> 01:19:58,224
We're moving now.
1039
01:20:30,659 --> 01:20:32,286
You believe this?
1040
01:20:32,360 --> 01:20:34,135
It's been a hell of a trip.
1041
01:20:34,160 --> 01:20:35,295
It sure has.
1042
01:20:35,363 --> 01:20:39,299
But... after all is said and done,
1043
01:20:39,367 --> 01:20:41,301
you did get me home
and I really appreciate it.
1044
01:20:41,369 --> 01:20:44,000
Hey, next time, let's go first class, all right?
1045
01:20:44,473 --> 01:20:46,008
God, I hope there isn't a next time.
1046
01:20:46,076 --> 01:20:48,608
I know what you mean. I really do.
1047
01:20:51,813 --> 01:20:53,246
This you?
1048
01:20:55,317 --> 01:20:56,249
Yeah.
1049
01:21:00,555 --> 01:21:02,489
- It's been great meeting you, Neal. It really has.
- Nice to meet you.
1050
01:21:02,557 --> 01:21:04,792
Again, I'm sorry if I caused you any trouble.
1051
01:21:04,860 --> 01:21:06,959
Oh, no, you didn't cause me trouble.
You got me home.
1052
01:21:07,028 --> 01:21:09,053
And... a little late.
1053
01:21:09,130 --> 01:21:10,757
A couple days.
1054
01:21:10,832 --> 01:21:12,265
But...
1055
01:21:12,334 --> 01:21:14,527
I'm a little wiser, too. So...
1056
01:21:14,602 --> 01:21:16,231
Me, too.
1057
01:21:17,339 --> 01:21:18,772
Happy holidays.
1058
01:21:18,840 --> 01:21:20,102
Same to you.
1059
01:21:22,210 --> 01:21:23,768
- Happy Thanksgiving, Neal.
- Okay.
1060
01:21:23,845 --> 01:21:26,279
- Give my love to the family, will you?
- Same to you.
1061
01:21:26,348 --> 01:21:28,407
- Maybe I'll get the chance to meet them someday.
- Okay.
1062
01:21:28,483 --> 01:21:30,781
Say hello to Marie for me.
I feel like I know her.
1063
01:21:30,852 --> 01:21:32,149
Yeah.
1064
01:21:33,355 --> 01:21:35,289
So... Okay.
1065
01:21:35,357 --> 01:21:37,655
And you have a happy Thanksgiving.
1066
01:21:37,726 --> 01:21:39,785
Hey, you know it.
1067
01:21:39,861 --> 01:21:41,522
So long.
1068
01:23:05,146 --> 01:23:07,740
I like... I like me.
1069
01:23:07,816 --> 01:23:09,340
My wife likes me.
1070
01:23:12,153 --> 01:23:15,247
At the very least,
the absolute minimum,
1071
01:23:15,323 --> 01:23:18,757
you've got a woman you love
to grow old with, right?
1072
01:23:24,933 --> 01:23:27,424
I'm spending too much time away from home.
1073
01:23:27,502 --> 01:23:29,766
I haven't been home in years.
1074
01:23:29,838 --> 01:23:32,072
I haven't been home in years.
1075
01:23:32,440 --> 01:23:34,774
I haven't been home in years.
1076
01:23:55,598 --> 01:23:59,728
Del, what are you doing here?
1077
01:24:06,807 --> 01:24:08,241
You said you were going home.
1078
01:24:08,309 --> 01:24:10,300
What are you doing here?
1079
01:24:11,813 --> 01:24:13,246
I...
1080
01:24:16,317 --> 01:24:18,182
I don't have a home.
1081
01:24:24,826 --> 01:24:27,260
Marie's been dead for eight years.
1082
01:25:03,364 --> 01:25:06,800
Boy. You are one lucky guy, Neal.
1083
01:25:08,068 --> 01:25:09,263
I know.
1084
01:25:10,872 --> 01:25:12,706
Look, I won't stay long or anything.
1085
01:25:12,734 --> 01:25:14,908
Maybe I'll just come in and say hi,
and then I'll be on my way, all right?
1086
01:25:14,976 --> 01:25:16,275
Just come on.
1087
01:25:34,395 --> 01:25:35,760
Hiya, kiddo.
1088
01:25:35,830 --> 01:25:37,297
Daddy!
1089
01:25:39,400 --> 01:25:40,765
Neal's home!
1090
01:25:40,835 --> 01:25:43,197
Del Griffith, I want you to meet
my father-in-law, Walt...
1091
01:25:43,271 --> 01:25:44,834
- ...my mother-in-law, Peg...
- Hi.
1092
01:25:44,906 --> 01:25:46,173
- ...my mother, Joy...
- Hello.
1093
01:25:46,206 --> 01:25:48,073
- ...and my dad Martin.
- How are you doing son?
1094
01:25:48,103 --> 01:25:49,000
- Welcome, Del.
- Pleased to meet you, sir.
1095
01:25:49,044 --> 01:25:50,900
- This little guy's Neal Jr...
- Hello.
1096
01:25:50,946 --> 01:25:52,779
- ...my little gem, Marti...
- Hi.
1097
01:25:52,847 --> 01:25:56,000
and somewhere around here
is my little baby boy, Seth.
1098
01:26:10,563 --> 01:26:13,027
Honey, I'd like you to meet a friend of mine.
1099
01:26:17,872 --> 01:26:20,204
Hello, Mr. Griffith.
1100
01:26:21,376 --> 01:26:23,367
Hello, Mrs. Page.
1101
01:32:08,823 --> 01:32:10,256
Here's two.
1102
01:32:20,835 --> 01:32:22,268
You're three.
75305
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