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1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:05,291
Hey, Danny. Ryan a...
Hello!
2
00:00:05,299 --> 00:00:08,302
Oh, hey.
3
00:00:08,309 --> 00:00:09,939
I didn't realize
we'd be interrupting
4
00:00:09,944 --> 00:00:10,901
a romantic evening.
5
00:00:10,904 --> 00:00:12,054
Aren't you gonna
introduce us
6
00:00:12,057 --> 00:00:13,622
to your little balloon friend?
7
00:00:13,627 --> 00:00:16,917
Actually, I'm recreating
the McKenzie murder scene.
8
00:00:16,925 --> 00:00:18,714
I'm trying to prove
it wouldn't have been impossible
9
00:00:18,719 --> 00:00:19,901
from this angle.
10
00:00:19,904 --> 00:00:21,871
[Boom]
11
00:00:22,754 --> 00:00:25,021
I think those breasts
might have been fake.
12
00:00:25,027 --> 00:00:26,401
Yeah.
13
00:00:26,405 --> 00:00:28,993
What are you guys
doing here?
14
00:00:28,999 --> 00:00:31,553
The karaoke competition
is in less than two weeks.
15
00:00:31,560 --> 00:00:33,222
We haven't even rehearsed once!
16
00:00:33,226 --> 00:00:35,622
We can't just hop up on stage
and sing anything, man!
17
00:00:35,628 --> 00:00:37,001
It's karaoke.
18
00:00:37,005 --> 00:00:38,251
I've been swamped with work.
19
00:00:38,255 --> 00:00:39,213
Please!
20
00:00:39,216 --> 00:00:41,451
You're swamped with Kim.
21
00:00:41,457 --> 00:00:43,342
And just remember, bro,
22
00:00:43,347 --> 00:00:45,519
no matter how sexy she is now,
23
00:00:45,524 --> 00:00:49,391
eventually,
that new-car smell wears off.
24
00:00:49,401 --> 00:00:50,678
Or even worse,
25
00:00:50,681 --> 00:00:52,406
a tall handsome man
might steal your car,
26
00:00:52,411 --> 00:00:54,040
after you put it
through med school,
27
00:00:54,045 --> 00:00:55,354
leaving you divorced,
28
00:00:55,357 --> 00:00:56,656
with nothing to drive
on a cold, lonely night.
29
00:00:58,175 --> 00:01:00,348
Hey! Why don't you
get your own analogy?
30
00:01:00,354 --> 00:01:02,622
We're talking about Kim here,
not your ex-wife.
31
00:01:02,628 --> 00:01:03,745
Yeah, I thought
32
00:01:03,748 --> 00:01:05,473
we were talking
about karaoke.
33
00:01:05,478 --> 00:01:06,755
We are!
34
00:01:06,759 --> 00:01:08,421
And we have stiff competition
this year.
35
00:01:08,425 --> 00:01:09,766
Dick gombert,
36
00:01:09,770 --> 00:01:11,814
the 85-year-old
Tony Bennett wanna-be
37
00:01:11,819 --> 00:01:14,312
got a pacemaker put in,
and he's gunning for us.
38
00:01:14,319 --> 00:01:18,535
Very slowly
gunning for us.
39
00:01:18,545 --> 00:01:20,111
We haven't even
picked a song yet.
40
00:01:20,115 --> 00:01:22,127
Now, I'm thinking
anything by Adele.
41
00:01:22,132 --> 00:01:25,133
I don't know who that is
and it sounds gay.
42
00:01:27,001 --> 00:01:28,434
I'm thinkin' queen.
43
00:01:30,459 --> 00:01:32,472
Let me guess, you get
to be Freddie Mercury?
44
00:01:32,477 --> 00:01:35,863
No, I'm gonna be Brian may. Have
we met?
45
00:01:35,871 --> 00:01:37,884
Freddie Mercury wore suspenders
with no shirt.
46
00:01:37,890 --> 00:01:39,456
No one wants to eat
a platter of wings
47
00:01:39,460 --> 00:01:41,121
while looking at your nipples.
48
00:01:41,126 --> 00:01:42,307
Yeah.
Especially the third one.
49
00:01:42,310 --> 00:01:43,972
It looks like it's winking.
50
00:01:43,977 --> 00:01:47,277
That's my belly-button.
I don't know how it got up here.
51
00:01:48,938 --> 00:01:51,591
Look, guys, I would
love to rehearse,
52
00:01:51,598 --> 00:01:53,163
but Kim's coming over.
53
00:01:53,167 --> 00:01:54,476
Well, no, look.
54
00:01:54,480 --> 00:01:55,631
We all have to make
sacrifices here,
55
00:01:55,634 --> 00:01:56,751
Danny, okay?
56
00:01:56,755 --> 00:01:58,488
I'm willing to
reschedule my date.
57
00:01:59,573 --> 00:02:01,363
You're going on a date?
58
00:02:01,368 --> 00:02:02,516
Not yet.
59
00:02:02,519 --> 00:02:04,372
What I meant
to say was,
60
00:02:04,377 --> 00:02:05,809
I joined an online
speed-dating site.
61
00:02:07,099 --> 00:02:08,921
Online speed-dating? Huh.
62
00:02:08,926 --> 00:02:11,993
So now you can get rejected from
the comfort of your own home?
63
00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:13,725
Look, I had no choice.
64
00:02:13,730 --> 00:02:15,072
My shrink
gave me an ultimatum...
65
00:02:15,076 --> 00:02:16,864
either start dating,
or find a new doctor.
66
00:02:16,869 --> 00:02:19,328
Get this...
he thinks I'm hung up on Alison.
67
00:02:19,334 --> 00:02:20,548
Oh, that's ridiculous.
68
00:02:20,551 --> 00:02:22,243
Poppycock!
69
00:02:22,248 --> 00:02:23,494
I know, right?
70
00:02:23,498 --> 00:02:25,767
Anyway, this has nothing
to do with Alison.
71
00:02:25,772 --> 00:02:27,209
It's about getting
a photo on Facebook
72
00:02:27,214 --> 00:02:28,970
with a really hot girl...
73
00:02:28,974 --> 00:02:31,041
That Alison can see.
74
00:02:32,209 --> 00:02:33,869
You know what, Danny?
Forget about it, okay?
75
00:02:33,874 --> 00:02:35,056
Ryan and I have
been working on
76
00:02:35,059 --> 00:02:37,200
this Sonny-and-Cher
thing anyhow.
77
00:02:37,206 --> 00:02:38,939
I'm not gonna be Cher!
78
00:02:41,753 --> 00:02:42,936
Whoa...
79
00:02:42,940 --> 00:02:44,888
Are you saying
I'm out of the fake band?
80
00:02:44,893 --> 00:02:46,490
I'm saying...
81
00:02:46,494 --> 00:02:49,688
You're not taking
our fake band seriously enough.
82
00:02:49,696 --> 00:02:51,549
How can you say that?
[Cell phone rings]
83
00:02:51,554 --> 00:02:54,013
No one is more dedicated
to this than...
84
00:02:54,019 --> 00:02:56,186
Oh! Hey, honey.
Yeah, I'll buzz you in.
85
00:02:59,369 --> 00:03:01,381
All right, tell you what,
we'll rehearse tonight.
86
00:03:01,386 --> 00:03:03,623
Kim was just coming over
to watch a movie anyway.
87
00:03:03,629 --> 00:03:05,066
I'm sure she'll understand.
88
00:03:05,070 --> 00:03:06,442
It's official.
89
00:03:06,446 --> 00:03:07,597
[Door bangs]
90
00:03:07,600 --> 00:03:09,132
I hate everyone.
91
00:03:09,137 --> 00:03:11,404
[Kicks inflatable doll]
92
00:03:14,390 --> 00:03:16,339
Tell her. Tell her.
93
00:03:16,344 --> 00:03:18,311
Uh-uh.
94
00:03:26,596 --> 00:03:29,088
sync and corrections by dreaMaker7
www.addic7ed.com
95
00:03:32,903 --> 00:03:34,467
So what happened?
96
00:03:34,471 --> 00:03:37,059
My best friend,
Linda, dumped me.
97
00:03:37,066 --> 00:03:38,120
Out of the blue?
98
00:03:38,123 --> 00:03:39,561
More or less.
99
00:03:39,565 --> 00:03:40,554
I was helping her
shop for this dress...
100
00:03:40,557 --> 00:03:43,560
I'm riveted.
101
00:03:43,568 --> 00:03:46,795
Anyway... She picks out
102
00:03:46,803 --> 00:03:47,984
this red-striped,
skin-tight dress.
103
00:03:47,987 --> 00:03:51,470
You know Linda, she's... Huge.
104
00:03:51,479 --> 00:03:53,460
And she turns around
105
00:03:53,465 --> 00:03:55,861
and she asks me if it
makes her ass look fat.
106
00:03:55,867 --> 00:03:57,240
Oh, crap.
107
00:03:57,244 --> 00:03:58,074
You didn't!
108
00:03:58,077 --> 00:03:59,510
That's hilarious.
109
00:04:01,214 --> 00:04:03,227
Well, what was I
supposed to say?
110
00:04:03,233 --> 00:04:04,670
You could've just said
it wasn't her colour.
111
00:04:04,674 --> 00:04:06,623
Oh! I never
thought of that.
112
00:04:06,628 --> 00:04:08,224
Or it was last season,
or a knock-off,
113
00:04:08,228 --> 00:04:09,090
or the stitching
looked cheap.
114
00:04:09,093 --> 00:04:10,563
I'm just saying.
115
00:04:10,567 --> 00:04:12,452
You know I can't lie.
116
00:04:12,457 --> 00:04:13,670
You know what I do
117
00:04:13,674 --> 00:04:15,400
when I have a day
like that?
118
00:04:15,404 --> 00:04:17,543
I like to go home,
119
00:04:17,549 --> 00:04:20,233
have a nice,
long hot bath,
120
00:04:20,240 --> 00:04:22,892
and let us rehearse.
121
00:04:22,898 --> 00:04:24,719
What are you talking about?
122
00:04:24,724 --> 00:04:27,119
Ahem. We're competing
in a karaoke competition.
123
00:04:27,125 --> 00:04:28,524
[Cracking up]
124
00:04:29,751 --> 00:04:31,184
Oh, you're serious?
125
00:04:32,922 --> 00:04:34,871
You know, whatever.
You guys go rehearse.
126
00:04:34,876 --> 00:04:37,272
I don't want to
do anything tonight.
127
00:04:37,278 --> 00:04:39,003
Are you sure, honey?
128
00:04:39,008 --> 00:04:40,974
You guys have fun.
129
00:04:42,946 --> 00:04:44,780
You see? I told you
she was understanding.
130
00:04:46,054 --> 00:04:48,228
- Now let's go rehearse.
- Yeah.
131
00:04:48,233 --> 00:04:49,637
[Kim sobbing]
132
00:04:49,641 --> 00:04:50,854
We'll see you later, then?
133
00:04:50,858 --> 00:04:52,057
Yeah, I'll call you tomorrow.
134
00:04:55,052 --> 00:04:56,683
[?]
135
00:04:56,687 --> 00:04:58,572
Okay, one more time
before court.
136
00:04:58,577 --> 00:05:00,142
Let's go over
your testimony.
137
00:05:00,146 --> 00:05:03,022
Relax! I'm just gonna
be telling the truth
138
00:05:03,030 --> 00:05:06,033
exactly the way
I memorized it.
139
00:05:06,040 --> 00:05:07,508
Hey, Mac.
Looking good.
140
00:05:07,512 --> 00:05:10,036
You, uh,
you been working out?
141
00:05:10,042 --> 00:05:11,288
Yeah!
142
00:05:11,292 --> 00:05:12,825
I've been training
with a gang-banger.
143
00:05:12,829 --> 00:05:14,585
I help him
with his portfolio.
144
00:05:14,590 --> 00:05:16,028
You know, for a man
who cheated the Colombians
145
00:05:16,032 --> 00:05:18,428
out of a million dollars
in cocaine,
146
00:05:18,434 --> 00:05:20,835
he's surprisingly
risk-averse.
147
00:05:22,147 --> 00:05:24,097
What are you
doing here, Sheldon?
148
00:05:24,102 --> 00:05:27,425
Well, somebody cancelled
another rehearsal,
149
00:05:27,433 --> 00:05:29,158
and we still haven't
nailed down a song.
150
00:05:29,163 --> 00:05:30,473
Now?
151
00:05:30,477 --> 00:05:33,033
In case you haven't noticed,
I'm working.
152
00:05:33,039 --> 00:05:34,124
Yeah, and when
you're not working,
153
00:05:34,128 --> 00:05:36,684
you're busy being
Kim's fat-ass girlfriend.
154
00:05:36,690 --> 00:05:38,127
No, I'm not.
155
00:05:38,131 --> 00:05:40,496
Okay.
156
00:05:40,502 --> 00:05:42,865
Did you
or did you not
157
00:05:42,871 --> 00:05:45,523
take a hot, steamy
bubble-bath last night?
158
00:05:45,530 --> 00:05:46,935
Yeah...
159
00:05:46,939 --> 00:05:49,706
But that was Kim and me.
So, you know.
160
00:05:51,134 --> 00:05:52,924
So you had sex, then?
161
00:05:52,929 --> 00:05:54,973
We were too tired
from talking.
162
00:05:54,978 --> 00:05:58,365
Ladies and gentlemen
of the jury,
163
00:05:58,373 --> 00:06:00,290
I rest my case.
164
00:06:00,295 --> 00:06:03,042
He's a woman!
165
00:06:03,049 --> 00:06:04,647
He's good.
166
00:06:04,652 --> 00:06:06,408
Sit down.
167
00:06:06,412 --> 00:06:08,551
Listen, Danny.
168
00:06:08,557 --> 00:06:09,867
You gotta grow
a sack, man.
169
00:06:09,871 --> 00:06:13,226
A great, big hairy sack,
just like the kind
170
00:06:13,234 --> 00:06:15,215
that dangles from
the throat of a moose.
171
00:06:15,220 --> 00:06:18,255
Now, I need a little
commitment here.
172
00:06:18,262 --> 00:06:21,010
Even Ryan moved around
his speed-dating for this.
173
00:06:21,017 --> 00:06:22,166
Ryan's dating again?
174
00:06:22,170 --> 00:06:24,182
- Yeah.
- Oh, good for him.
175
00:06:24,187 --> 00:06:26,360
I always got right
back on the horse
176
00:06:26,366 --> 00:06:30,434
after each one of
my wives mysteriously died.
177
00:06:31,554 --> 00:06:33,950
You know what?
178
00:06:33,956 --> 00:06:37,566
I'm not leaving
until we pick out a song.
179
00:06:37,574 --> 00:06:40,674
I don't think you understand.
180
00:06:40,682 --> 00:06:44,325
I am trying to
save a man's life here!
181
00:06:44,334 --> 00:06:47,209
[Whispers] And it's really
not looking very good.
182
00:06:47,216 --> 00:06:50,666
I don't think
you understand! I got...
183
00:06:50,674 --> 00:06:52,559
I got a lot of money
riding on this, okay?
184
00:06:52,564 --> 00:06:54,705
Who bets on karaoke?
185
00:06:54,711 --> 00:06:56,659
I got a local bookie
who covers everything...
186
00:06:56,664 --> 00:06:58,932
student elections,
reality shows, haircuts.
187
00:06:58,938 --> 00:07:01,750
I lost a lot of money
on pee-wee basketball.
188
00:07:01,757 --> 00:07:03,130
You don't think
189
00:07:03,134 --> 00:07:04,634
I would rather be
hanging out with you guys
190
00:07:04,638 --> 00:07:07,162
than going to another
farmers' market with Kim?
191
00:07:07,168 --> 00:07:11,194
[Gasps] Great, a $12 apple. Yay!
192
00:07:11,204 --> 00:07:12,834
Don't listen to me,
193
00:07:12,838 --> 00:07:14,818
I'm just the allegedly-insane
alleged wife-killer,
194
00:07:14,824 --> 00:07:17,827
but, um... Find Kim
a new best friend.
195
00:07:17,834 --> 00:07:19,783
Wait a minute...
196
00:07:19,788 --> 00:07:22,951
You know how
Ryan's speed-dating
197
00:07:22,959 --> 00:07:24,875
to find
a new girlfriend?
198
00:07:24,880 --> 00:07:28,749
What about speed... friending?
199
00:07:30,004 --> 00:07:31,187
What, get a bunch of
women together
200
00:07:31,190 --> 00:07:32,946
and let Kim take her pick?
201
00:07:32,951 --> 00:07:36,337
It's like
a farmers' market for chicks.
202
00:07:36,345 --> 00:07:40,851
Well, we would be...
Helping, right?
203
00:07:40,862 --> 00:07:42,906
And if she did find
a new friend,
204
00:07:42,911 --> 00:07:45,148
I'd finally
have time to rehearse.
205
00:07:45,154 --> 00:07:46,719
Well, let me know
if she's cute.
206
00:07:46,723 --> 00:07:49,490
I could use a new wife.
207
00:07:51,206 --> 00:07:53,443
[?]
208
00:07:53,449 --> 00:07:55,526
All I know is,
I'm glad the marriage is over.
209
00:07:55,531 --> 00:07:57,416
I mean, what did I see
in Alison anyway?
210
00:07:57,421 --> 00:07:59,854
Besides, being single
is way more fun.
211
00:08:03,890 --> 00:08:05,679
Is that your wedding picturebehind you?
212
00:08:05,684 --> 00:08:07,664
Of course not.
213
00:08:07,669 --> 00:08:09,555
That... came with the frame.
214
00:08:09,560 --> 00:08:11,893
They look so happy.
215
00:08:13,594 --> 00:08:16,182
...which brings me
to this point.
216
00:08:16,189 --> 00:08:17,402
I suppose I'm lucky
I don't have to work anymore,
217
00:08:17,406 --> 00:08:19,451
thanks to the divorce
settlement, but still...
218
00:08:19,456 --> 00:08:21,819
I'd much prefer
to be married and in love.
219
00:08:21,825 --> 00:08:23,007
I just think...
220
00:08:23,010 --> 00:08:24,876
Do you wanna have cyber-sex?
221
00:08:28,102 --> 00:08:30,020
Who's the guy
in the background?
222
00:08:30,025 --> 00:08:31,526
Oh, that's Pete.
223
00:08:31,531 --> 00:08:32,363
He likes to watch.
224
00:08:33,900 --> 00:08:35,817
I guess you couldcall me a homebody.
225
00:08:35,822 --> 00:08:38,153
I haven't been outsidein 10 years.
226
00:08:38,159 --> 00:08:39,917
You're an agoraphobic?
227
00:08:39,921 --> 00:08:41,230
Do you want
to come over?
228
00:08:41,234 --> 00:08:42,352
Oh, and could you
pick up some groceries?
229
00:08:42,356 --> 00:08:43,922
I'm really hungry.
230
00:08:47,159 --> 00:08:49,972
I'm a little nervousif you can't tell.
231
00:08:49,979 --> 00:08:52,779
Uh-huh. Yeah. [Blows nail]
232
00:08:53,980 --> 00:08:56,089
Truth is...
233
00:08:56,095 --> 00:08:57,565
I'm stillgetting over my husband.
234
00:08:57,569 --> 00:08:59,645
He cheated on me with a doctor.
235
00:08:59,650 --> 00:09:01,631
Oh, my God! Me too.
236
00:09:01,637 --> 00:09:02,882
Gastroenterologist?
237
00:09:02,885 --> 00:09:04,355
Podiatrist!
238
00:09:04,359 --> 00:09:05,317
Oh!
239
00:09:05,320 --> 00:09:08,642
So... how about dinner?
240
00:09:08,650 --> 00:09:10,918
Well... you do
look photogenic enough
241
00:09:10,924 --> 00:09:12,357
to make someone jealous.
242
00:09:13,581 --> 00:09:15,116
How do you feel
about teeth-whitening?
243
00:09:15,120 --> 00:09:16,748
Excuse me?
244
00:09:16,753 --> 00:09:17,872
You're totally right.
245
00:09:17,875 --> 00:09:20,718
That's what Photoshop is for!
246
00:09:20,725 --> 00:09:23,025
[?]
247
00:09:23,031 --> 00:09:24,339
How do
you know Danny?
248
00:09:24,343 --> 00:09:26,772
I'm a parole officer.
249
00:09:26,778 --> 00:09:29,545
Okay!
250
00:09:30,588 --> 00:09:32,506
Vicki is great.
251
00:09:32,511 --> 00:09:34,363
You guys actually have
a lot in common.
252
00:09:34,368 --> 00:09:36,478
You're both
from California.
253
00:09:36,484 --> 00:09:38,335
Really?
I'm from L.A.
254
00:09:38,340 --> 00:09:40,384
I hate L.A.
255
00:09:40,389 --> 00:09:44,415
Yes. But Kim's a girl,
and you like girls.
256
00:09:44,424 --> 00:09:46,324
Discuss.
257
00:09:49,389 --> 00:09:50,891
She didn't like
the parole officer either?
258
00:09:50,895 --> 00:09:51,948
I don't get it.
259
00:09:51,951 --> 00:09:53,316
Vicki is actually
really funny.
260
00:09:54,737 --> 00:09:56,303
Guys. We got to practice.
261
00:09:56,308 --> 00:09:58,064
Dick gombert
just got a hip replacement.
262
00:09:58,068 --> 00:10:00,469
He's more machine
than man.
263
00:10:01,559 --> 00:10:02,926
Can I talk to you
for a second?
264
00:10:04,665 --> 00:10:06,008
Can we get out of here?
265
00:10:06,012 --> 00:10:07,800
But the party's
just starting.
266
00:10:07,805 --> 00:10:09,371
Lots more women
are coming.
267
00:10:10,111 --> 00:10:11,740
And men!
268
00:10:11,744 --> 00:10:13,085
Are you looking
for a three-way?
269
00:10:13,089 --> 00:10:14,527
What? No!
270
00:10:14,531 --> 00:10:15,744
Are you?
271
00:10:15,748 --> 00:10:18,272
No. It's just that
you keep introducing me
272
00:10:18,278 --> 00:10:20,035
to all these weird women.
273
00:10:20,040 --> 00:10:21,190
Weird? What?
274
00:10:21,194 --> 00:10:22,280
You think
they're all weird?
275
00:10:22,283 --> 00:10:24,048
Even bernice
the court reporter?
276
00:10:29,999 --> 00:10:32,534
I'll be at the bar.
277
00:10:33,684 --> 00:10:36,752
Hey... I gotta tell
ya, Kim's awful picky
278
00:10:36,760 --> 00:10:38,859
for a girl
with no friends.
279
00:10:40,601 --> 00:10:43,349
Hey, guys!
This is Janice.
280
00:10:43,356 --> 00:10:45,529
Oh! Hey.
The Internet chick.
281
00:10:45,534 --> 00:10:46,524
Nice.
282
00:10:46,527 --> 00:10:48,027
Hey, I have an idea.
283
00:10:48,032 --> 00:10:49,165
Sheldon, could you take
a photo of us, please?
284
00:10:50,530 --> 00:10:52,128
Hey, let's do one of
those funny ones,
285
00:10:52,132 --> 00:10:53,346
where you're
nibbling on my ear...
286
00:10:53,350 --> 00:10:55,582
I just think that'd
be so cute for Facebook.
287
00:10:57,607 --> 00:10:59,142
Thanks.
288
00:10:59,146 --> 00:11:00,871
Whoa! You are
rockin' that bag.
289
00:11:00,876 --> 00:11:02,537
Where did you
get that?
290
00:11:02,541 --> 00:11:03,690
It's this
little outlet
291
00:11:03,694 --> 00:11:05,355
next to the yoga
studio on main.
292
00:11:05,359 --> 00:11:06,573
Is that near
"the loose leaf"?
293
00:11:06,577 --> 00:11:08,078
That's my tea shop!
294
00:11:08,082 --> 00:11:09,710
I love that place!
295
00:11:09,715 --> 00:11:11,440
Yeah! You look
really familiar.
296
00:11:11,444 --> 00:11:13,201
Ding! Ding! Ding!
297
00:11:13,206 --> 00:11:15,306
We have a winner!
298
00:11:20,645 --> 00:11:21,732
Morning, Mac.
299
00:11:21,735 --> 00:11:23,363
Morning, Danny.
300
00:11:23,368 --> 00:11:25,381
Boy, I am telling you,
I am loving these workouts.
301
00:11:25,386 --> 00:11:26,632
If I ever make it outta here,
302
00:11:26,636 --> 00:11:29,070
I'm going to be
a real lady-killer.
303
00:11:30,222 --> 00:11:32,746
Rephrase that, please!
304
00:11:32,753 --> 00:11:34,222
How are things
working out
305
00:11:34,226 --> 00:11:35,568
with Kim
and her new friend?
306
00:11:35,572 --> 00:11:37,009
It's great.
307
00:11:37,013 --> 00:11:38,674
Kim's happy again.
308
00:11:38,678 --> 00:11:40,434
I've had time to rehearse
with the guys.
309
00:11:40,439 --> 00:11:41,557
You know,
I even found a way
310
00:11:41,560 --> 00:11:43,285
to get that video of
you hiring a hit man
311
00:11:43,290 --> 00:11:44,503
thrown out.
312
00:11:44,507 --> 00:11:45,657
Hey, I didn't
hire that guy, okay?
313
00:11:45,660 --> 00:11:47,194
It was just a joke.
314
00:11:47,198 --> 00:11:49,880
Well, his rate was a joke.
315
00:11:49,887 --> 00:11:51,037
Yeah, it's nice.
316
00:11:51,040 --> 00:11:52,733
Although, last night,
317
00:11:52,738 --> 00:11:54,366
she did watch "The bachelor"
with Janice, which sort of hurt.
318
00:11:54,371 --> 00:11:56,832
It was
a rose ceremony.
319
00:11:56,838 --> 00:11:59,714
Danny, it's me.
320
00:11:59,721 --> 00:12:01,733
How long have
we been friends?
321
00:12:01,738 --> 00:12:03,558
I guess ever since
322
00:12:03,563 --> 00:12:05,448
you might have
killed your wife.
323
00:12:05,453 --> 00:12:07,465
Oh. Seems longer.
324
00:12:07,470 --> 00:12:10,218
Anyway, I think
I know you well enough
325
00:12:10,225 --> 00:12:12,206
to see that
you're not happy.
326
00:12:12,211 --> 00:12:14,319
Okay, I didn't think
327
00:12:14,325 --> 00:12:15,410
Kim would be spending
this much time with Janice,
328
00:12:15,413 --> 00:12:16,371
but it's fine.
329
00:12:16,374 --> 00:12:17,844
[Phone buzzes]
330
00:12:17,848 --> 00:12:19,892
We're actually having dinner
tonight, so.
331
00:12:19,898 --> 00:12:21,878
Oh. I guess we're not.
332
00:12:21,883 --> 00:12:23,000
She just cancelled.
333
00:12:23,003 --> 00:12:26,710
To spend the night with Janice.
334
00:12:26,719 --> 00:12:29,083
You know, Danny...
335
00:12:29,089 --> 00:12:31,805
I know someone...
might be a little expensive...
336
00:12:31,812 --> 00:12:35,380
who can make this problem...
Go away.
337
00:12:37,064 --> 00:12:39,077
Oh, my God!
What are you saying?
338
00:12:39,083 --> 00:12:41,159
A therapist.
339
00:12:41,164 --> 00:12:43,049
Oh... good.
340
00:12:43,054 --> 00:12:45,769
[Both laughing heartily]
341
00:12:45,776 --> 00:12:48,971
What do you think,
I'm a monster?
342
00:12:48,979 --> 00:12:50,161
Oh, no. You care for Kim!
343
00:12:50,164 --> 00:12:52,847
No! Sheesh.
344
00:12:52,854 --> 00:12:54,356
Now, this Janice woman...
345
00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:56,226
Do you
have an address?
346
00:12:58,618 --> 00:13:00,376
Look, I've been doing
a lot of thinking
347
00:13:00,381 --> 00:13:01,563
about this, okay?
348
00:13:01,566 --> 00:13:02,587
I hear what
you're saying.
349
00:13:02,590 --> 00:13:05,124
But I think
we should do Adele.
350
00:13:06,304 --> 00:13:08,989
We all got
your little emails, Ryan.
351
00:13:08,996 --> 00:13:10,996
Now man up
and put on your wig!
352
00:13:12,998 --> 00:13:14,789
This better not
be human hair.
353
00:13:14,793 --> 00:13:15,782
Or synthetic.
354
00:13:15,786 --> 00:13:17,320
It's not.
355
00:13:17,324 --> 00:13:18,282
Well, what is it, then?
356
00:13:18,285 --> 00:13:21,415
They're 100% pure awesome!
357
00:13:21,422 --> 00:13:23,307
You know,
I still say
358
00:13:23,313 --> 00:13:25,070
the Beatles would
be together
359
00:13:25,074 --> 00:13:28,781
if Paul and Ringo had just found
a little friend for yoko.
360
00:13:28,790 --> 00:13:31,025
About that... we need
to talk about Janice.
361
00:13:31,031 --> 00:13:32,821
Wait a minute.
She doesn't like Kim?
362
00:13:32,826 --> 00:13:34,262
No, she likes her
too much.
363
00:13:34,266 --> 00:13:35,926
Yeah, well,
I'm glad someone does,
364
00:13:35,930 --> 00:13:37,688
'cause, guys,
I cannot stand Janice!
365
00:13:37,693 --> 00:13:38,937
Oh, my God.
366
00:13:38,941 --> 00:13:41,051
She tells the same stories
over and over!
367
00:13:41,056 --> 00:13:42,525
On top of that,
368
00:13:42,529 --> 00:13:43,870
she spits
when she gets excited.
369
00:13:43,874 --> 00:13:45,631
I keep feeding her crackers,
hoping it'll dry her up.
370
00:13:45,636 --> 00:13:46,722
Nothin'!
371
00:13:46,725 --> 00:13:47,683
I gotta
break up with her.
372
00:13:47,686 --> 00:13:49,922
You know,
that is a great idea.
373
00:13:49,928 --> 00:13:51,013
No, no. You can't!
374
00:13:51,016 --> 00:13:53,252
Who's gonna keep an eye on Kim?
375
00:13:53,258 --> 00:13:55,016
I don't know.
Maybe her boyfriend?
376
00:13:55,021 --> 00:13:56,426
Ridiculous!
377
00:13:56,430 --> 00:13:59,591
You've gotta help
win this competition
378
00:13:59,599 --> 00:14:01,804
so I can pay off my bookie.
379
00:14:01,809 --> 00:14:04,813
Am I the only one
thinking about me here?
380
00:14:04,821 --> 00:14:07,344
What if she wants to
have sex with me? Huh?
381
00:14:07,350 --> 00:14:09,518
I can even imagine how much
spitting that'll involve.
382
00:14:10,585 --> 00:14:12,215
[Thumps table]
383
00:14:12,219 --> 00:14:16,253
Let me tell you
what a wise man once said to me.
384
00:14:18,367 --> 00:14:21,978
[Off-key]: ? Risin' up
? back on the street
385
00:14:21,987 --> 00:14:25,693
? did my time
took my chances... ?
386
00:14:25,702 --> 00:14:28,546
[?]
387
00:14:28,553 --> 00:14:29,894
I was an army brat!
388
00:14:29,898 --> 00:14:30,920
Yeah?
389
00:14:30,923 --> 00:14:33,447
First, we lived in spokane...
390
00:14:33,454 --> 00:14:36,617
Then we moved up
to sault-ste. Marie...
391
00:14:36,624 --> 00:14:38,508
Saskatoon...
392
00:14:38,513 --> 00:14:40,494
[Slowing down ominously]:
Sausalito...
393
00:14:40,500 --> 00:14:41,766
[Spittle whooshing]
394
00:14:45,943 --> 00:14:47,604
...and finally, Cleveland.
395
00:14:47,609 --> 00:14:50,517
Oh! Ohio!
396
00:14:50,524 --> 00:14:53,059
No, Mississippi!
397
00:14:54,559 --> 00:14:55,773
[With music, off-key]:
? Risin' up
398
00:14:55,777 --> 00:14:58,525
? straight to the top
399
00:14:58,532 --> 00:15:02,045
? had the guts
had the glory ?
400
00:15:02,053 --> 00:15:04,290
? went the distance
401
00:15:04,296 --> 00:15:06,276
? now I'm not
gonna stop ?
402
00:15:06,281 --> 00:15:10,116
? just a man
and his will to survive ?
403
00:15:10,125 --> 00:15:13,193
? it's the ? eye of the tiger
404
00:15:13,201 --> 00:15:14,669
Ugh! Those are men's!
405
00:15:14,673 --> 00:15:16,572
Ah!
406
00:15:18,964 --> 00:15:21,841
Oh! I haven't
been this turned on
407
00:15:21,848 --> 00:15:23,860
since I had a threesome
with the Foo Fighters.
408
00:15:23,866 --> 00:15:26,262
You had sex
with the Foo Fighters?
409
00:15:26,268 --> 00:15:28,217
Well, actually,
the faux fighters.
410
00:15:28,222 --> 00:15:30,106
These guys sold
insurance or something,
411
00:15:30,111 --> 00:15:32,091
but, man,
they did a hot
412
00:15:32,096 --> 00:15:34,140
"Long road to ruin."
413
00:15:34,145 --> 00:15:36,445
So, a karaoke
groupie, huh?
414
00:15:36,451 --> 00:15:38,685
Sounds, uh,
kind of desperate.
415
00:15:39,750 --> 00:15:41,061
Oh, that's a compliment.
416
00:15:41,065 --> 00:15:41,997
Oh!
417
00:15:48,044 --> 00:15:51,657
Do you feel
what I feel?
418
00:15:51,666 --> 00:15:53,710
Well, if you feel
like watching msnbc,
419
00:15:53,715 --> 00:15:54,737
then yes.
420
00:15:54,740 --> 00:15:56,573
[Spit-laughing]
421
00:16:00,120 --> 00:16:03,388
I want you now!
422
00:16:04,955 --> 00:16:06,202
[Unnerved]: Okay.
423
00:16:06,206 --> 00:16:09,040
Just let me grab
some protection first.
424
00:16:14,116 --> 00:16:16,448
[Tv announcer]: Next upon Lacrosse the Country,"
425
00:16:16,454 --> 00:16:17,763
we're in winnipeg
426
00:16:17,767 --> 00:16:19,301
for the women's amateursemi-finals.
427
00:16:26,944 --> 00:16:30,331
? That face,
that face ?
428
00:16:30,339 --> 00:16:34,960
- ? that wonderful face ?
- Look at him!
429
00:16:35,046 --> 00:16:36,292
He should be
embarrassed,
430
00:16:36,296 --> 00:16:38,963
wearing an outfit
like that, at his age.
431
00:16:40,426 --> 00:16:42,794
Oh, hey!
Uh, Kim's here.
432
00:16:43,885 --> 00:16:45,963
Which means Janice
isn't far behind.
433
00:16:45,968 --> 00:16:47,596
She's not coming.
434
00:16:47,601 --> 00:16:49,359
We had a fight.
435
00:16:49,363 --> 00:16:50,671
You're not gonna believe this.
436
00:16:50,675 --> 00:16:53,679
She asked me
if she spits when she talks.
437
00:16:53,686 --> 00:16:55,794
What was
I supposed to do, lie?
438
00:16:55,800 --> 00:16:58,644
Yeah. That's how
men survive.
439
00:16:58,651 --> 00:17:00,441
You guys know I can't lie.
440
00:17:00,446 --> 00:17:02,010
Now she never wants to
talk to me again.
441
00:17:02,014 --> 00:17:05,144
Oh, yeah! Now can I
break up with her?
442
00:17:05,152 --> 00:17:06,717
Why are you asking them?
443
00:17:06,721 --> 00:17:08,830
Yeah! Why are you asking us?
444
00:17:08,836 --> 00:17:10,497
Yeah, what are you?
Stupid or something?
445
00:17:10,501 --> 00:17:12,386
Right, no, of course.
446
00:17:12,391 --> 00:17:13,732
I mean,
what was I thinking?
447
00:17:13,736 --> 00:17:15,492
I'm the one dating her.
448
00:17:15,497 --> 00:17:17,574
Of my own free will.
449
00:17:17,579 --> 00:17:20,103
What the hell
is going on here?
450
00:17:20,110 --> 00:17:21,514
Okay, here's the thing.
451
00:17:21,518 --> 00:17:24,394
You are gonna laugh
when you hear this.
452
00:17:24,401 --> 00:17:26,383
Eventually.
453
00:17:26,388 --> 00:17:27,983
You had that fight
with Linda.
454
00:17:27,987 --> 00:17:30,257
Right? And we...we
had to rehearse,
455
00:17:30,263 --> 00:17:32,563
and you needed me
to go look at purses with...
456
00:17:32,569 --> 00:17:35,507
you wanted to get rid of me,
so you set me up with Janice?
457
00:17:35,514 --> 00:17:36,631
Look...
no, no, no, no.
458
00:17:36,635 --> 00:17:37,914
We just gave you
the options.
459
00:17:37,917 --> 00:17:40,250
You chose her.
460
00:17:41,534 --> 00:17:42,750
Come on, Ryan.
461
00:17:42,754 --> 00:17:43,743
Let's go do a shot
before we go on.
462
00:17:43,746 --> 00:17:45,151
I don't want a shot.
463
00:17:45,155 --> 00:17:47,555
I need you to pay.
464
00:17:49,318 --> 00:17:51,460
I don't believe this.
465
00:17:51,465 --> 00:17:53,157
You pawned me off
on that-that spitter
466
00:17:53,162 --> 00:17:54,312
just so you could
have more time
467
00:17:54,315 --> 00:17:55,337
with your brothers?
468
00:17:55,340 --> 00:17:56,968
Well, when you say it
like that,
469
00:17:56,973 --> 00:17:58,283
of course, it sounds bad.
470
00:17:58,287 --> 00:18:00,906
Now, why couldn't
you just be honest?
471
00:18:00,912 --> 00:18:02,414
Really? Honesty?
472
00:18:02,419 --> 00:18:04,618
Look how well that's
worked out for you so far.
473
00:18:06,292 --> 00:18:07,411
Let's go, we're on.
474
00:18:07,414 --> 00:18:10,130
Can we just talk
about this after?
475
00:18:10,137 --> 00:18:13,076
You know, you said
you wanted more space?
476
00:18:13,083 --> 00:18:14,489
Kim...
477
00:18:14,493 --> 00:18:16,442
[Host taps mic]:
And now, coming to the stage,
478
00:18:16,447 --> 00:18:18,459
our three-time champions...
479
00:18:18,465 --> 00:18:21,307
Sheldon white
and his little brother band!
480
00:18:21,314 --> 00:18:23,998
"Sheldon white
and his little brother band?"
481
00:18:24,004 --> 00:18:25,921
I thought we agreed on
"White here, white now"?
482
00:18:25,926 --> 00:18:27,525
Come on!
483
00:18:28,809 --> 00:18:30,855
I can't believe
we lost.
484
00:18:30,860 --> 00:18:32,648
How do you forget
the lyrics
485
00:18:32,653 --> 00:18:34,218
to "Eye of the Tiger?"
486
00:18:34,222 --> 00:18:35,887
Those are the lyrics.
487
00:18:37,070 --> 00:18:38,446
I'm sorry, guys. Okay?
488
00:18:38,450 --> 00:18:40,238
I don't know what happened.
489
00:18:40,243 --> 00:18:42,447
It's this whole thing with Kim,
it just threw me off my game.
490
00:18:42,453 --> 00:18:45,617
Look, I will pay off your debt
with the bookie.
491
00:18:45,624 --> 00:18:49,586
It's all right, I already
gave him your credit card.
492
00:18:49,596 --> 00:18:52,343
Come on, let's go crash
dick gombert's victory party.
493
00:18:52,350 --> 00:18:53,819
I hear
his grand-daughter's hot.
494
00:18:53,823 --> 00:18:55,823
Although she's 60.
495
00:18:57,601 --> 00:18:59,998
Nah. I'm good.
496
00:19:00,004 --> 00:19:01,474
Hey, guys.
497
00:19:01,478 --> 00:19:02,911
Yoko.
498
00:19:06,761 --> 00:19:09,029
Oh. You're back.
499
00:19:09,035 --> 00:19:10,121
Okay.
500
00:19:10,124 --> 00:19:11,498
I thought about
what you said,
501
00:19:11,502 --> 00:19:12,874
and I understand why
502
00:19:12,878 --> 00:19:14,156
you set me up
with Janice.
503
00:19:14,160 --> 00:19:16,940
Well, it was still
a pretty crappy thing to do.
504
00:19:16,947 --> 00:19:18,321
From now on...
505
00:19:18,325 --> 00:19:19,890
You'll always
be my boyfriend,
506
00:19:19,894 --> 00:19:21,106
not my girlfriend.
507
00:19:21,110 --> 00:19:22,771
Are those my tights?
508
00:19:22,775 --> 00:19:23,941
Yes.
509
00:19:25,273 --> 00:19:27,126
Come here.
510
00:19:27,130 --> 00:19:28,568
What?
511
00:19:28,573 --> 00:19:30,937
Oh, my G...no!
No, no, no, no.
512
00:19:30,943 --> 00:19:32,764
Oh, come on, it's fun!
513
00:19:32,768 --> 00:19:34,868
["I got you, babe" karaoke track plays]
514
00:19:38,949 --> 00:19:42,689
? They say we're young
and we don't know ?
515
00:19:42,698 --> 00:19:46,533
? we won't find out
until we grow ?
516
00:19:48,237 --> 00:19:50,954
[Horribly off-key]:
? Well, I don't know
517
00:19:50,961 --> 00:19:52,269
? if that is true
518
00:19:52,273 --> 00:19:57,258
? 'cause you got me
and, baby, I got you... ?
519
00:19:57,270 --> 00:19:59,090
[Shuts track off]
520
00:19:59,094 --> 00:20:00,661
You're awful.
521
00:20:05,020 --> 00:20:07,575
Hey... you know I can't lie.
522
00:20:07,576 --> 00:20:10,111
[Laughs]
523
00:20:10,161 --> 00:20:14,711
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
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Afrikaans
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