All language subtitles for Crystal Fairy and the Magical Cactus (2013)

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:02:32,599 --> 00:02:33,861 Hey, how's the party? All good? 2 00:02:33,900 --> 00:02:35,162 lt's good, man. 3 00:02:38,071 --> 00:02:39,038 Hey, Diego. 4 00:02:39,072 --> 00:02:40,903 Good, and you? 5 00:02:50,884 --> 00:02:51,851 You want some? 6 00:03:19,779 --> 00:03:21,542 Yeah, come in! 7 00:03:25,685 --> 00:03:27,585 - Hey, Gepe. - Hey. 8 00:03:27,621 --> 00:03:28,610 Hey, how's it going, Manu? 9 00:03:49,142 --> 00:03:50,507 Here, you want some? 10 00:04:25,645 --> 00:04:26,737 Hey, want some more? 11 00:07:07,140 --> 00:07:08,368 Nice to meet you. 12 00:07:47,914 --> 00:07:49,245 Fuck. 13 00:09:16,436 --> 00:09:17,403 ...ls that l'm carrying my purse. 14 00:09:17,437 --> 00:09:18,734 How can you even say that? 15 00:09:19,639 --> 00:09:20,936 You can't. You just can't. 16 00:09:20,974 --> 00:09:22,339 And how are you going to pee, girl? 17 00:09:22,375 --> 00:09:24,002 Oh, it's easy. 18 00:09:24,043 --> 00:09:26,170 You're just ridiculous. 19 00:09:26,212 --> 00:09:27,440 Oh, you cover me. Oover me. 20 00:09:27,480 --> 00:09:30,210 l bet you didn't even bring toilet paper. 21 00:09:30,250 --> 00:09:33,242 No, l'll just wipe myself with-oh! 22 00:09:33,286 --> 00:09:34,753 Oh, you're ridiculous. 23 00:09:37,924 --> 00:09:39,084 Hurry up, girl. 24 00:09:39,125 --> 00:09:40,183 Wait for me, girl! 25 00:09:41,394 --> 00:09:43,419 You're taking too long. 26 00:09:43,463 --> 00:09:45,260 You're wearing, like, four pairs of underwear. 27 00:09:45,298 --> 00:09:46,731 You're ridiculous. 28 00:09:46,766 --> 00:09:47,733 Shut up! 29 00:09:47,767 --> 00:09:49,064 l want to see how the hell you're going to pee in that. 30 00:09:51,137 --> 00:09:52,695 Look. Someone's coming. 31 00:09:52,739 --> 00:09:54,604 They're American. They're American. 32 00:09:54,641 --> 00:09:56,836 Oh, say hello! Say hi to them for me. 33 00:10:07,020 --> 00:10:08,419 Oan l have a little bite of your apple? 34 00:10:11,591 --> 00:10:12,580 Oh, it's just a bite. 35 00:10:13,793 --> 00:10:15,818 He says, how many dicks have you sucked today? 36 00:10:16,930 --> 00:10:18,295 - Lots. - Lots! 37 00:10:20,934 --> 00:10:21,923 What are your names? 38 00:10:28,942 --> 00:10:30,000 He says he can cook something for you if you want. 39 00:10:30,043 --> 00:10:31,305 To the house! 40 00:11:02,642 --> 00:11:04,041 Bye-bye, girls. Good night. 41 00:11:04,077 --> 00:11:05,044 What? 42 00:11:05,078 --> 00:11:06,045 Nice to meet you. 43 00:11:06,079 --> 00:11:08,104 But what's going on? 44 00:11:21,361 --> 00:11:22,555 Are you going back to work or- 45 00:11:34,941 --> 00:11:37,603 Hmm, bored. 46 00:11:51,824 --> 00:11:53,155 Bye, honey! 47 00:14:47,400 --> 00:14:48,389 There they are. 48 00:14:52,205 --> 00:14:54,196 That's Alvaro's car, isn't it? 49 00:15:07,853 --> 00:15:08,820 What? You did coke? 50 00:15:10,523 --> 00:15:11,490 Fuck, just a little. 51 00:15:18,531 --> 00:15:21,694 This guy said something about some drag queens? 52 00:15:21,734 --> 00:15:23,258 This guy tells them, ''Oh, you're hungry? 53 00:15:23,302 --> 00:15:24,735 l'll make you some rice.'' 54 00:15:24,770 --> 00:15:26,465 Are you kidding me? 55 00:15:27,506 --> 00:15:29,064 What the fuck. The girls knew English? 56 00:15:47,927 --> 00:15:51,624 He says that San Pedro is safe because it's, like, a cactus. 57 00:15:51,664 --> 00:15:54,599 lt's a natural drug, and it's not- 58 00:15:54,634 --> 00:15:56,465 Like, it's been condemned socially because of- 59 00:17:02,268 --> 00:17:03,462 - Hello. - Hello, good afternoon. 60 00:17:03,502 --> 00:17:05,402 Good afternoon. Do you have any empanadas left? 61 00:17:05,438 --> 00:17:06,837 Yes, sir, meat empanadas. 62 00:17:06,872 --> 00:17:07,964 Just meat? 63 00:17:08,007 --> 00:17:09,338 Just meat. 64 00:17:09,375 --> 00:17:10,399 And how much are they? 65 00:17:10,443 --> 00:17:11,569 800 pesos. 66 00:17:11,610 --> 00:17:13,271 l want an empanada. You? 67 00:17:13,312 --> 00:17:14,301 - l'll have one too. - Okay, me too. 68 00:17:21,487 --> 00:17:22,454 Do you have coffee? 69 00:17:24,924 --> 00:17:26,516 ls it, like, from a coffee machine? 70 00:17:26,559 --> 00:17:27,685 No, it's instant. 71 00:17:30,863 --> 00:17:33,661 Yes, one coffee and three empanadas. 72 00:17:33,699 --> 00:17:34,927 Thank you. 73 00:17:49,382 --> 00:17:51,782 He ate a seafood empanada, and, man, 74 00:17:51,817 --> 00:17:54,285 he puked it all back up in the middle of the highway. 75 00:17:54,320 --> 00:17:55,617 lt was disgusting. 76 00:17:55,654 --> 00:17:56,621 Thank you. 77 00:17:58,357 --> 00:18:00,985 - Very unpleasant. - Thank you. 78 00:18:01,026 --> 00:18:02,687 That shit was gross. 79 00:18:04,263 --> 00:18:05,252 Thank you, sir. 80 00:18:06,332 --> 00:18:07,697 You can eat it here if you want. 81 00:18:07,733 --> 00:18:09,667 - All right, thank you. - Thank you. 82 00:18:09,702 --> 00:18:10,691 Thank you. 83 00:20:25,004 --> 00:20:26,562 He invited this chick to the north. 84 00:20:26,605 --> 00:20:27,594 l thought he was kidding. 85 00:20:47,259 --> 00:20:48,726 Hello, excuse me. 86 00:20:48,761 --> 00:20:50,456 Where is the town square? 87 00:20:50,496 --> 00:20:51,793 The town square, where is it? 88 00:20:51,830 --> 00:20:52,797 - The town square? - Yes. 89 00:20:52,831 --> 00:20:53,798 Further up. 90 00:20:53,832 --> 00:20:55,299 Further up? Right, thank you. 91 00:21:21,994 --> 00:21:23,086 Hello. Do you think l can fit here? 92 00:21:23,128 --> 00:21:24,618 Yeah, right here. 93 00:21:43,415 --> 00:21:44,814 How are you boys doing? 94 00:21:44,850 --> 00:21:47,444 Do you have a cigarette for me, honey? 95 00:21:47,486 --> 00:21:48,612 Of course. 96 00:21:48,654 --> 00:21:50,645 Here it says, like l told you before, 97 00:21:50,689 --> 00:21:53,214 that you're going to do well, that you're going to be happy. 98 00:21:53,258 --> 00:21:55,158 Are you in a relationship? Are you working? 99 00:22:05,537 --> 00:22:07,562 No, no, not that, see? 100 00:22:07,606 --> 00:22:08,971 Not that. 101 00:22:09,008 --> 00:22:09,997 No, no, no. 102 00:22:10,042 --> 00:22:11,031 Not that, money. 103 00:22:11,076 --> 00:22:12,634 Money. You can't eat with that. 104 00:22:39,238 --> 00:22:40,205 She has to pay! She has to pay! 105 00:22:40,239 --> 00:22:42,707 You're crazy. You're crazy. 106 00:22:42,741 --> 00:22:44,538 Stop, stop, stop! What happened? 107 00:22:44,576 --> 00:22:45,543 What happened? 108 00:22:45,577 --> 00:22:47,010 Oan you explain to me what happened? 109 00:22:51,417 --> 00:22:53,317 But she gave you a drawing. She's an American. 110 00:22:53,352 --> 00:22:54,614 She doesn't have any Ohilean money. 111 00:22:54,653 --> 00:22:56,553 Don't bother her anymore. 112 00:23:15,774 --> 00:23:16,798 Sorry about the disturbance. 113 00:23:16,842 --> 00:23:19,572 That girl and that blond. 114 00:23:30,923 --> 00:23:33,448 - Are you okay? - Yes, yes. 115 00:23:33,492 --> 00:23:34,481 Yes? 116 00:24:32,451 --> 00:24:34,146 Do you have any fresh lettuce? 117 00:25:28,106 --> 00:25:29,767 On the beach! 118 00:25:57,369 --> 00:25:58,859 Ma'am? 119 00:25:58,904 --> 00:26:00,132 Do you have toilet paper? 120 00:26:12,818 --> 00:26:16,254 What do you prefer? Pisco? 121 00:26:16,288 --> 00:26:17,619 Pisco, whatever, man. 122 00:26:51,590 --> 00:26:52,750 Whose stuff is this? 123 00:26:57,029 --> 00:26:59,224 - Hello. - Hello, good night. 124 00:26:59,264 --> 00:27:00,629 Hello. 125 00:27:00,666 --> 00:27:03,191 There's no problem with us being five, right? 126 00:27:03,235 --> 00:27:05,396 The room is for four people only. 127 00:27:05,437 --> 00:27:07,064 You'll have to figure it out yourselves, all right? 128 00:27:14,646 --> 00:27:16,511 Okay, good night. Sleep well. 129 00:27:16,548 --> 00:27:17,606 Thank you. 130 00:27:17,649 --> 00:27:18,638 - Good night. - Good night. 131 00:27:18,684 --> 00:27:20,549 Good night, thank you. 132 00:27:50,916 --> 00:27:52,213 You're the youngest, 133 00:27:52,250 --> 00:27:54,548 and there's no way l'm giving up my bed. 134 00:27:54,586 --> 00:27:56,144 What is it? 135 00:28:19,311 --> 00:28:20,903 No, give it to her, man. 136 00:31:15,887 --> 00:31:16,854 Out the ear? 137 00:31:19,658 --> 00:31:20,625 A dwarf? 138 00:31:24,829 --> 00:31:25,796 - All of it? - The rest of your life. 139 00:31:25,830 --> 00:31:26,854 All of it. 140 00:31:26,898 --> 00:31:29,458 Or having a midget chase you for the rest of your life. 141 00:31:53,024 --> 00:31:54,013 Thank you. 142 00:32:07,539 --> 00:32:09,370 Oan you hand me the beer? 143 00:35:44,456 --> 00:35:45,855 We're leaving now. 144 00:35:45,890 --> 00:35:46,879 Yes. 145 00:36:37,442 --> 00:36:38,431 Hello! 146 00:36:41,012 --> 00:36:42,001 Hello! 147 00:36:43,548 --> 00:36:45,379 Hello. 148 00:36:45,416 --> 00:36:47,407 - Hello, excuse us. - Hello. 149 00:36:47,452 --> 00:36:49,579 Oan l ask you something? 150 00:36:49,621 --> 00:36:50,588 Okay. 151 00:36:50,622 --> 00:36:53,489 lt's that, we're here with some friends. 152 00:36:53,525 --> 00:36:55,152 We want to drink some San Pedro, 153 00:36:55,193 --> 00:36:56,683 and we wanted to ask you 154 00:36:56,728 --> 00:36:58,628 if you could sell us that one over there or a piece. 155 00:36:58,663 --> 00:36:59,857 No. 156 00:36:59,898 --> 00:37:01,365 Really? Why not? 157 00:37:01,399 --> 00:37:02,627 No, because it's mine. 158 00:37:02,667 --> 00:37:03,691 And... 159 00:37:04,736 --> 00:37:06,294 Are you going to drink it, or what are you going to do? 160 00:37:07,338 --> 00:37:08,305 No, that one is for me. 161 00:37:09,440 --> 00:37:10,429 Yeah, it's for me. 162 00:37:10,475 --> 00:37:11,533 We can pay you good money for it. 163 00:37:15,280 --> 00:37:16,338 Do you know where we can find some? 164 00:37:18,383 --> 00:37:19,350 Not around here. 165 00:37:19,384 --> 00:37:20,612 Almost everyone around here hides them, 166 00:37:20,652 --> 00:37:21,619 at least the few that have them. 167 00:37:27,992 --> 00:37:30,517 No, l'm not selling. l'm not selling my cactus, no. 168 00:37:30,562 --> 00:37:32,587 - Darn. - Nothing. 169 00:37:32,630 --> 00:37:33,961 Nothing, right. Bye. 170 00:37:33,998 --> 00:37:34,987 l'm busy. 171 00:38:00,925 --> 00:38:02,085 Hello! 172 00:38:04,729 --> 00:38:05,696 Hello. 173 00:38:05,730 --> 00:38:07,254 Hello, ma'am. 174 00:38:11,736 --> 00:38:15,968 Ma'am, could you sell us some of your San Pedro? 175 00:38:16,007 --> 00:38:17,998 Not the whole thing. We can pay a good price for it. 176 00:38:18,042 --> 00:38:20,101 My friend has-impossible? 177 00:38:20,144 --> 00:38:21,611 No, there's no chance you might sell us a little piece? 178 00:38:29,621 --> 00:38:30,588 Right, okay. 179 00:38:30,622 --> 00:38:31,611 l'm sorry. Thank you. 180 00:39:00,618 --> 00:39:01,676 What if we leave? 181 00:39:20,905 --> 00:39:21,894 Oan l have the lighter? 182 00:41:11,115 --> 00:41:12,082 Hello! 183 00:41:15,620 --> 00:41:16,780 How are you, ma'am? 184 00:41:16,821 --> 00:41:18,049 Hello. 185 00:41:19,557 --> 00:41:20,524 Good, ma'am, and you? 186 00:41:20,558 --> 00:41:21,547 Good afternoon. 187 00:41:25,163 --> 00:41:26,858 Ma'am, hello. 188 00:41:26,898 --> 00:41:28,263 How are you? 189 00:41:28,299 --> 00:41:29,766 - Hello. - Hello. 190 00:41:33,304 --> 00:41:35,465 Do you think we could buy some of your cactus? 191 00:41:35,506 --> 00:41:37,804 Not the whole thing, but a little piece? 192 00:41:37,842 --> 00:41:39,571 - Please? - Um, no. 193 00:41:41,179 --> 00:41:42,146 Do you think we could, ma'am? 194 00:41:44,148 --> 00:41:45,115 Please. 195 00:41:46,150 --> 00:41:47,117 l'd have to think about it. 196 00:41:48,686 --> 00:41:49,778 Just a little piece? 197 00:41:49,821 --> 00:41:51,652 l'm not sure about this, but come on in. 198 00:41:51,689 --> 00:41:53,384 You're not in a hurry, are you? 199 00:41:53,424 --> 00:41:54,584 Yes, thank you. 200 00:41:55,693 --> 00:41:57,752 Very pretty. Very pretty. 201 00:42:14,145 --> 00:42:15,112 - Very pretty. - Yes, yes. 202 00:42:15,146 --> 00:42:16,170 Your house is very pretty. 203 00:42:25,957 --> 00:42:27,925 There are some chairs if you want to sit down. 204 00:42:27,959 --> 00:42:29,221 All right. Thank you very much, ma'am. 205 00:42:33,364 --> 00:42:35,229 About the cactus, yes. 206 00:42:35,266 --> 00:42:36,893 Oh, l'd have to think about it. 207 00:42:36,934 --> 00:42:37,958 A little. 208 00:42:38,002 --> 00:42:39,435 Okay, there's no rush. 209 00:42:39,470 --> 00:42:41,165 No, yes, yes. 210 00:42:44,308 --> 00:42:45,297 Your house is very pretty. 211 00:42:45,343 --> 00:42:46,435 l like your cat. 212 00:42:46,477 --> 00:42:48,843 - Ah, yes, it's a cat. - Yes. 213 00:42:48,880 --> 00:42:52,372 Yes, l really like teddy bears, 214 00:42:52,416 --> 00:42:53,542 anything like that. 215 00:42:53,584 --> 00:42:54,881 That's why l'm carrying this one around. 216 00:42:56,053 --> 00:43:00,285 He's restless, isn't he? 217 00:43:00,324 --> 00:43:02,554 Yes, don't pay any attention to him. 218 00:43:02,593 --> 00:43:04,220 He'd like to have the cactus, but... 219 00:43:04,262 --> 00:43:07,129 And you like the house and he likes the cactus, no? 220 00:43:07,164 --> 00:43:09,359 Yes. 221 00:43:09,400 --> 00:43:11,334 Oh, can l show you something? 222 00:43:11,369 --> 00:43:12,529 - Sure. - Look. 223 00:44:11,495 --> 00:44:13,326 The mayor gave it to me, 224 00:44:13,364 --> 00:44:15,264 along with everyone else who agreed 225 00:44:15,299 --> 00:44:17,062 to present me with an award, 226 00:44:17,101 --> 00:44:21,902 which is why l take good, good care of it. 227 00:44:50,434 --> 00:44:52,129 - Are you kidding me, man? - Dude, check it out! 228 00:45:27,171 --> 00:45:28,399 What did she say? 229 00:46:42,146 --> 00:46:43,113 l'd stop too. 230 00:47:07,671 --> 00:47:10,435 Pollo, relax. 231 00:48:19,510 --> 00:48:20,704 Where is my sleeping bag, man? 232 00:48:20,744 --> 00:48:21,802 Right there. 233 00:48:21,845 --> 00:48:23,073 No, a green one. 234 00:48:23,113 --> 00:48:24,102 l don't know. 235 00:48:25,783 --> 00:48:28,343 The thing is that it takes, like, 1 2 hours 236 00:48:28,385 --> 00:48:31,115 to cook San Pedro. 237 00:48:31,155 --> 00:48:33,646 Hey, Ohampa, tell him to help up. 238 00:48:39,630 --> 00:48:41,097 Here, hand me one. 239 00:48:41,131 --> 00:48:43,429 Fuck, this guy Jamie is kind of getting on my nerves, man. 240 00:48:43,467 --> 00:48:44,399 Really? 241 00:48:44,435 --> 00:48:46,266 Yeah, you can tell he's really fucking excited, 242 00:48:46,303 --> 00:48:47,463 but whatever, man. 243 00:48:47,504 --> 00:48:48,528 lt's the San Pedro. 244 00:48:48,572 --> 00:48:52,633 Just think that he came all the way to Ohile for that thing. 245 00:49:15,366 --> 00:49:17,231 Hey, these tents are fucking ancient, man. 246 00:49:17,268 --> 00:49:18,929 They don't even have stakes. 247 00:49:25,476 --> 00:49:27,569 Made a mistake, kissed a snake. 248 00:49:27,611 --> 00:49:28,805 How many doctors will it take? 249 00:49:42,660 --> 00:49:45,094 Hey, hand me that stick. 250 00:49:45,129 --> 00:49:47,461 No, man, l know how to pitch a tent. 251 00:52:48,045 --> 00:52:49,012 Lel, come on! 252 00:52:54,384 --> 00:52:55,783 Oome on, Lel! 253 00:55:05,682 --> 00:55:06,649 No, just say it in Spanish. 254 00:55:08,251 --> 00:55:09,912 Um, yeah. 255 00:55:09,953 --> 00:55:11,978 What l'm most scared of are people 256 00:55:12,022 --> 00:55:13,819 that have, like, bad intentions 257 00:55:13,857 --> 00:55:15,916 and not realizing about them. 258 00:55:47,791 --> 00:55:50,385 Thank you. 259 00:57:44,875 --> 00:57:47,275 Man, Ohampa, please translate. 260 00:57:47,310 --> 00:57:48,777 What the fuck is she saying? 261 00:57:52,716 --> 00:57:55,412 That in 201 2, there's going to be a change, 262 00:57:55,452 --> 00:57:57,249 because it's the end of the Mayan calendar, 263 00:57:57,287 --> 00:58:00,415 and that her fear, finally, is that, like, 264 00:58:00,457 --> 00:58:04,223 humanity won't be able to achieve this change, 265 00:58:04,261 --> 00:58:07,822 which is a total transformation of man. 266 01:03:29,085 --> 01:03:30,074 The magic pebbles, do you have them? 267 01:04:02,752 --> 01:04:03,684 Here, Ohampa. Your magic pebble. 268 01:04:35,418 --> 01:04:37,010 Ah, thank you. 269 01:04:58,975 --> 01:04:59,964 Do it, pussy. 270 01:05:46,122 --> 01:05:47,089 ln the throat. 271 01:05:48,358 --> 01:05:50,087 That shit was gross. 272 01:05:50,126 --> 01:05:51,787 Did you drink the whole thing? 273 01:05:51,828 --> 01:05:53,489 But do you feel like puking? 274 01:05:53,529 --> 01:05:54,553 No, not yet. 275 01:05:54,597 --> 01:05:55,689 No. l don't know. 276 01:05:55,732 --> 01:05:57,199 lt was really gross. But whatever. 277 01:05:57,233 --> 01:05:58,325 Just get ready for what's coming later. 278 01:06:08,244 --> 01:06:10,109 Dude, Orystal Hairy is losing it. 279 01:06:10,146 --> 01:06:11,113 Oheck it out. 280 01:06:13,549 --> 01:06:15,312 Yeah, but she's just doing her thing. 281 01:06:15,351 --> 01:06:16,340 lt's not the San Pedro. 282 01:06:24,060 --> 01:06:25,220 lt's two hours, so... 283 01:07:51,681 --> 01:07:52,841 Let's go, man, please. 284 01:09:38,254 --> 01:09:39,744 Hey, Jamie's kind of pale, isn't he? 285 01:09:57,740 --> 01:09:59,833 Don't be an idiot, Pilo. 286 01:10:05,681 --> 01:10:06,773 All right, let's not pay attention to him for a while. 287 01:11:22,692 --> 01:11:23,750 Man, shall we go to the water? 288 01:16:17,620 --> 01:16:19,110 You didn't drink the San Pedro, Pilo. 289 01:16:20,456 --> 01:16:21,514 No. 290 01:16:21,557 --> 01:16:23,286 Fuck, you fat-ass, man. 291 01:16:30,599 --> 01:16:32,260 l think l want a beer, man. 292 01:16:34,670 --> 01:16:35,830 What's Pollo doing? 293 01:20:40,315 --> 01:20:41,509 All right. Let's trap Jamie. 294 01:20:43,285 --> 01:20:44,616 Wrap him up, dude. 295 01:21:14,016 --> 01:21:15,381 She was, like, sad, man. 296 01:21:24,993 --> 01:21:25,982 What, is he going to apologize to her? 297 01:21:26,028 --> 01:21:26,995 Yeah. 298 01:28:00,622 --> 01:28:01,782 What is that shit? 299 01:28:08,863 --> 01:28:09,921 But it's cool, man. A bad experience. 300 01:28:17,906 --> 01:28:19,635 But anyway, you got to talk to those whale guys. 301 01:28:19,674 --> 01:28:20,641 You still had a good time. 19757

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