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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
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2
00:01:18,402 --> 00:01:19,517
Okay, everybody.
3
00:01:19,722 --> 00:01:23,874
It's time for the weekly
Bundy baby progress report.
4
00:01:27,002 --> 00:01:28,754
Well, I can sense your excitement.
5
00:01:28,962 --> 00:01:32,113
So even though one of us is missing,
I think we should still begin.
6
00:01:32,322 --> 00:01:36,235
Let's start with the reading of the
minutes from our last meeting. Kelly?
7
00:01:42,722 --> 00:01:44,519
"At the beginning of the last meeting...
8
00:01:44,722 --> 00:01:47,634
...I suggested we have
no more meetings.
9
00:01:49,522 --> 00:01:52,036
It was seconded by Bud, my brother...
10
00:01:52,242 --> 00:01:54,233
...and Dad, my daddy.
11
00:01:55,682 --> 00:01:57,957
We stared dully at Mom
and then were forced...
12
00:01:58,162 --> 00:02:01,074
...into a chorus of
'We Love the Baby.'
13
00:02:01,282 --> 00:02:02,715
Then Mom left to pee...
14
00:02:02,922 --> 00:02:06,073
...and Dad suggested
that we play a gleeful round...
15
00:02:06,282 --> 00:02:08,557
...of 'How Fat is She? '
16
00:02:11,802 --> 00:02:14,714
Dad guessed 415 pounds.
17
00:02:16,122 --> 00:02:18,238
We all laughed, and Dad said:
18
00:02:18,442 --> 00:02:20,831
'Don't write this down, Pumpkin."'
19
00:02:22,282 --> 00:02:24,557
That concludes my report.
20
00:02:26,362 --> 00:02:29,559
Let the record show
your father is a weenie.
21
00:02:31,042 --> 00:02:34,159
And now, can we have a report
from the treasury?
22
00:02:42,922 --> 00:02:47,120
Let the record show your father
has nothing in his pants.
23
00:02:58,282 --> 00:03:01,035
Oh, my God. Baby meeting!
24
00:03:01,482 --> 00:03:04,394
Get back here, young man!
25
00:03:04,842 --> 00:03:08,357
Yeah, pay your respect to the fetus
just like the rest of us.
26
00:03:16,282 --> 00:03:19,399
Most glorious
inhabitant of the womb...
27
00:03:21,202 --> 00:03:24,433
...please accept the blessing
of this unworthy one.
28
00:03:24,642 --> 00:03:27,554
I love you more than I love myself.
29
00:03:27,762 --> 00:03:29,480
Hail baby.
30
00:03:34,682 --> 00:03:36,798
The baby is pleased.
31
00:03:37,002 --> 00:03:38,435
You may sit.
32
00:03:38,642 --> 00:03:40,951
Listen, I have great news.
33
00:03:41,162 --> 00:03:44,632
As the only intelligent
living male Bundy...
34
00:03:45,602 --> 00:03:47,991
...l'm proud to announce
I've gotten a scholarship...
35
00:03:48,202 --> 00:03:50,033
...and I'm going to junior college.
36
00:03:50,482 --> 00:03:53,679
And just how does that
pertain to the baby?
37
00:03:54,482 --> 00:03:55,517
Thank you.
38
00:03:55,842 --> 00:03:57,833
So I decided to start college
across town...
39
00:03:58,202 --> 00:04:00,591
...instead of this neighbourhood,
where I'm accused...
40
00:04:00,802 --> 00:04:02,713
...of being a total social failure.
41
00:04:03,282 --> 00:04:05,318
Don't be so hard on yourself, Bud.
42
00:04:05,522 --> 00:04:06,955
I'm sure lots of cool guys...
43
00:04:07,162 --> 00:04:09,722
...spend their Friday nights
watching Star Trek reruns...
44
00:04:09,922 --> 00:04:13,631
...hoping to catch a glimpse
of Klingon cleavage.
45
00:04:18,602 --> 00:04:21,912
Let the record show that I was
wetting the screen with my tongue...
46
00:04:22,122 --> 00:04:23,601
...to clean it.
47
00:04:29,882 --> 00:04:31,634
To continue...
48
00:04:31,882 --> 00:04:33,440
Chicks love new blood.
49
00:04:33,682 --> 00:04:35,991
So I'm assuming
a whole new identity.
50
00:04:36,202 --> 00:04:38,591
As of now, my story is
I'm a bad-boy rapper...
51
00:04:38,802 --> 00:04:40,793
...from the streets of New York.
52
00:04:42,602 --> 00:04:44,638
Goodbye, Bud Bundy.
53
00:04:45,162 --> 00:04:47,676
Hello, Grandmaster B.
54
00:04:51,042 --> 00:04:52,794
What does the B stand for?
55
00:04:53,002 --> 00:04:54,674
"Brother of an idiot."
56
00:04:59,322 --> 00:05:00,835
Anyhow, if anyone asks...
57
00:05:01,042 --> 00:05:03,192
...my parents sent me here
to clean up my act...
58
00:05:03,402 --> 00:05:06,917
...because I either killed a guy
or spray-painted a tree or something.
59
00:05:07,202 --> 00:05:11,320
Excuse me, but isn't that the plot
for The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air?
60
00:05:11,802 --> 00:05:14,714
Well, that's an NBC show,
so who would know that?
61
00:05:22,202 --> 00:05:25,319
So if anyone asks,
I'm not related to any of you.
62
00:05:25,762 --> 00:05:28,037
And I'm coolly dangerous.
63
00:05:30,122 --> 00:05:32,682
I am not going
to be dateless this year.
64
00:05:32,882 --> 00:05:35,999
- Now, if you've finished, Bud...
- B.
65
00:05:54,802 --> 00:05:57,396
And just yesterday he was in diapers.
66
00:05:58,522 --> 00:05:59,875
Literally.
67
00:06:01,282 --> 00:06:03,432
I killed a man in New York, you know.
68
00:06:03,642 --> 00:06:06,600
Forgive me, Ghostbuster B.
69
00:06:08,202 --> 00:06:10,352
It's Grandmaster B.
70
00:06:10,562 --> 00:06:11,961
Of course, honey.
71
00:06:12,562 --> 00:06:14,393
Now, let's get back
to the baby meeting.
72
00:06:14,602 --> 00:06:17,116
Given the fact, and I would like
this to go on record...
73
00:06:17,322 --> 00:06:19,472
...that your father earns nothing...
74
00:06:19,682 --> 00:06:22,116
...it seems that we'll be
a little pressed for room...
75
00:06:22,322 --> 00:06:24,153
...when the blessed event comes.
76
00:06:24,722 --> 00:06:26,280
- Hail baby.
- Hail baby.
77
00:06:27,602 --> 00:06:31,914
Who is loved more than all babies
that came before him.
78
00:06:32,162 --> 00:06:33,993
Now, since we have limited space...
79
00:06:34,202 --> 00:06:37,558
...I would like to move that the baby
share a room with Daddy and me.
80
00:06:37,762 --> 00:06:40,196
We'll just put a crib
at the foot of the bed.
81
00:06:43,362 --> 00:06:45,318
I would like the record to show...
82
00:06:45,562 --> 00:06:48,759
...that I would rather sleep
in a bunk bed under Oprah.
83
00:06:53,642 --> 00:06:55,997
I would rather engage
in a frolicking threesome...
84
00:06:56,202 --> 00:06:58,670
...with Roseanne
and her cool husband.
85
00:07:01,442 --> 00:07:04,002
I would rather play naked Twister...
86
00:07:04,202 --> 00:07:07,194
...with every one
of the Golden Girls...
87
00:07:08,482 --> 00:07:12,760
...than have that little screaming
doodie geyser at the foot of my bed.
88
00:07:14,762 --> 00:07:17,560
I've said my piece. Thank you.
89
00:07:20,362 --> 00:07:22,318
Hail baby.
90
00:07:23,762 --> 00:07:25,400
All right then, let's have a vote.
91
00:07:25,602 --> 00:07:29,800
All those in favour of the baby sharing
a room with Mommy and Daddy?
92
00:07:30,002 --> 00:07:32,641
- Opposed?
- I must use my veto power.
93
00:07:32,842 --> 00:07:36,471
- Motion is carried.
- Veto! Veto, I say!
94
00:07:36,842 --> 00:07:39,800
All right, everybody, I'll see you
at the next baby meeting.
95
00:07:40,042 --> 00:07:43,034
But for now, Mommy
must use the bathroom.
96
00:07:43,442 --> 00:07:45,512
Al, if you would be so kind...
97
00:07:45,802 --> 00:07:46,837
I'm warning you, Peg.
98
00:07:47,042 --> 00:07:49,078
You will not make a mockery
of my veto power.
99
00:07:49,282 --> 00:07:52,274
I am the man of the house,
and my will is law!
100
00:07:58,842 --> 00:08:02,596
For the record,
she's now up to 500 pounds.
101
00:08:07,402 --> 00:08:09,836
This is my temporary crib, babe.
102
00:08:13,442 --> 00:08:15,637
Thanks for carrying my books.
103
00:08:18,082 --> 00:08:20,312
Anything to help keep
your gun hand free...
104
00:08:20,522 --> 00:08:22,194
...Mixmaster B.
105
00:08:24,122 --> 00:08:25,953
That's Grandmaster B.
106
00:08:26,642 --> 00:08:28,360
And I don't carry a gun anymore.
107
00:08:28,562 --> 00:08:30,439
Because I have a new life
here in Bel-Air...
108
00:08:30,642 --> 00:08:32,633
I mean, Chicago.
109
00:08:34,402 --> 00:08:36,518
Have I shown you my scar?
110
00:08:37,322 --> 00:08:40,712
You scare and excite me
when you talk like that.
111
00:08:41,762 --> 00:08:43,115
Take me.
112
00:08:45,042 --> 00:08:47,431
First, do it for me, B.
113
00:08:48,722 --> 00:08:50,553
Give me your rap.
114
00:08:51,802 --> 00:08:53,155
All right.
115
00:09:29,762 --> 00:09:31,480
And now...
116
00:09:32,562 --> 00:09:33,961
You may take me.
117
00:09:34,162 --> 00:09:35,595
Thank you.
118
00:09:35,802 --> 00:09:37,201
No problem.
119
00:09:42,682 --> 00:09:44,434
Well, look.
120
00:09:45,162 --> 00:09:48,950
My little man
is getting his first kiss.
121
00:09:51,682 --> 00:09:54,276
You're the coolest, Grandma B.
122
00:09:56,802 --> 00:09:58,952
That's Grandmaster B.
123
00:10:00,122 --> 00:10:01,111
Look, babe...
124
00:10:01,322 --> 00:10:04,200
...I think I'm going to have to rap
my way out of the rent now.
125
00:10:04,402 --> 00:10:05,994
You go on home
and wait by the phone.
126
00:10:06,202 --> 00:10:09,717
If I call and you're not there,
you go to the bottom of the list.
127
00:10:16,682 --> 00:10:18,718
What did I tell you two?!
128
00:10:19,682 --> 00:10:21,161
I am Grandmaster B.
129
00:10:21,362 --> 00:10:23,478
Grand. Master. B.
130
00:10:23,682 --> 00:10:26,958
Mom, I'm cool. You're
ruining it for me! I'm cool.
131
00:10:28,722 --> 00:10:31,919
Gee, I'm really sorry,
Grand Marshal B.
132
00:10:33,802 --> 00:10:36,999
No, Mom, I think it's Bed-Wetter B.
133
00:10:37,962 --> 00:10:40,999
Are you sure? I thought
it was Court Jester B.
134
00:10:42,322 --> 00:10:44,313
Peg! Peg!
135
00:10:44,762 --> 00:10:46,639
Guess what I found in the attic?
136
00:10:46,842 --> 00:10:49,914
It's something of my father's
that served him well for 20 years.
137
00:10:50,402 --> 00:10:53,633
And now, will serve me
for the rest of my life.
138
00:10:53,842 --> 00:10:55,673
A pair of socks?
139
00:10:56,802 --> 00:10:59,157
Bud, what do you think I found?
140
00:10:59,362 --> 00:11:02,240
If it's a rubber woman, Dad,
I can explain.
141
00:11:04,322 --> 00:11:05,994
You send away
for one Archie comic...
142
00:11:06,202 --> 00:11:08,636
...the next thing you know,
they put you on a list...
143
00:11:12,322 --> 00:11:13,755
Pumpkin?
144
00:11:14,522 --> 00:11:16,592
You found a pumpkin, Daddy?
145
00:11:19,242 --> 00:11:20,880
Well, I guess I'll tell you all...
146
00:11:21,082 --> 00:11:23,880
...since none of you
singly deserve to know.
147
00:11:26,362 --> 00:11:28,080
I found my father's hammer.
148
00:11:31,522 --> 00:11:34,639
This hammer has been
in my family for generations.
149
00:11:34,842 --> 00:11:38,755
With this, my father hit
the now-famous Bundy nail.
150
00:11:38,962 --> 00:11:40,953
And upon that nail,
he did hang his hat.
151
00:11:46,002 --> 00:11:47,799
My dad had one great dream...
152
00:11:48,002 --> 00:11:49,913
...and that dream was handed down...
153
00:11:50,122 --> 00:11:52,795
...from generation to generation
of male Bundys:
154
00:11:53,002 --> 00:11:54,401
To build their own room...
155
00:11:54,602 --> 00:11:57,241
...and live separately from their wives.
156
00:11:59,442 --> 00:12:00,716
Sadly, they all failed.
157
00:12:00,922 --> 00:12:03,834
No, genetically they all failed.
158
00:12:04,482 --> 00:12:06,632
Well, not me! I'm going to do it!
159
00:12:07,282 --> 00:12:10,001
Look, Dad. I've got your hammer.
160
00:12:10,202 --> 00:12:13,000
Your little boy's
gonna build his own room.
161
00:12:14,242 --> 00:12:16,312
Mom, who is he talking to?
162
00:12:16,642 --> 00:12:18,519
Grandpa.
163
00:12:18,722 --> 00:12:20,201
Hi, Grandpa.
164
00:12:28,482 --> 00:12:32,270
Look, Dad, I'm building my own room.
165
00:12:33,722 --> 00:12:36,600
I'll dedicate the first nail to you.
166
00:12:42,322 --> 00:12:43,994
Damn cheap Sheetrock!
167
00:12:46,322 --> 00:12:49,314
I can't believe you're gonna let
that moron move out of your room.
168
00:12:49,722 --> 00:12:53,510
Marcie, you're assuming
he can actually do this.
169
00:12:53,722 --> 00:12:55,121
You know the Bundy legacy:
170
00:12:55,322 --> 00:12:59,440
What they don't finish in 30 seconds,
they never finish.
171
00:13:00,762 --> 00:13:02,832
Besides, you know, it's important...
172
00:13:03,042 --> 00:13:05,317
...to let your man fail
in front of your eyes.
173
00:13:05,522 --> 00:13:07,638
It's a great thing to see.
174
00:13:07,882 --> 00:13:10,840
You know the fun we have
watching them fail at sex.
175
00:13:11,042 --> 00:13:12,361
Do I ever.
176
00:13:12,562 --> 00:13:14,234
Like when you say:
177
00:13:14,442 --> 00:13:16,273
"It's okay, honey.
178
00:13:16,482 --> 00:13:19,235
I'm sure it happens to all men.
179
00:13:21,282 --> 00:13:25,833
It doesn't mean there's anything
wrong with you, does it?"
180
00:13:28,882 --> 00:13:30,793
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Or when you say:
181
00:13:31,002 --> 00:13:33,596
"It's okay, honey.
You're probably just tired...
182
00:13:33,802 --> 00:13:36,236
...and unsure of your manhood."
183
00:13:36,442 --> 00:13:38,592
Or, " It's okay.
184
00:13:38,802 --> 00:13:41,714
We can just lay here
and hold each other.
185
00:13:41,922 --> 00:13:44,231
That's just as good."
186
00:13:45,402 --> 00:13:48,235
Then when they lay their head
on you like a child, trembling...
187
00:13:48,442 --> 00:13:51,957
...it is just as good.
God, you just want to laugh.
188
00:13:55,202 --> 00:13:58,990
Well, believe me when I tell you, it is
just as much fun to watch them fail...
189
00:13:59,202 --> 00:14:01,318
...with their clothes on.
190
00:14:02,042 --> 00:14:03,395
Watch.
191
00:14:04,562 --> 00:14:07,122
I can't get the nails
to go in straight.
192
00:14:07,962 --> 00:14:11,079
Gee, honey, it's probably just
because you're tired...
193
00:14:11,282 --> 00:14:13,398
...and unsure of your manhood.
194
00:14:13,602 --> 00:14:16,639
I did not fail.
I'll build that room! I will, it's just...
195
00:14:17,082 --> 00:14:19,801
I've got a lot on my mind right now.
196
00:14:29,042 --> 00:14:31,795
Mom, do you think he's actually
doing something in there?
197
00:14:32,002 --> 00:14:35,039
Honey, must I remind you
of his family tree?
198
00:14:35,242 --> 00:14:37,551
Do we not remember Amadeus Bundy?
199
00:14:37,762 --> 00:14:40,401
Who, when Alexander Graham Bell
patented the telephone...
200
00:14:40,602 --> 00:14:44,311
...tried to patent shouting
as a cheaper alternative?
201
00:14:45,042 --> 00:14:46,634
Or how about Wrong-Way Bundy...
202
00:14:46,842 --> 00:14:48,719
...the original inventor of the shotgun.
203
00:14:48,922 --> 00:14:52,437
Only he never quite perfected
which way to point it.
204
00:14:52,962 --> 00:14:55,476
We later called him Headless Bundy.
205
00:14:56,762 --> 00:14:59,401
But, Mom, Dad's not like the others.
206
00:14:59,602 --> 00:15:01,479
He sells shoes.
207
00:15:04,242 --> 00:15:05,721
It's done!
208
00:15:05,922 --> 00:15:09,198
Now, come in and take your
first and last look.
209
00:15:09,402 --> 00:15:12,360
All right now, kids. Daddy has
worked very, very hard at this.
210
00:15:12,562 --> 00:15:14,200
And it means a lot to him.
211
00:15:14,522 --> 00:15:16,990
So nobody laugh until I do.
212
00:15:32,402 --> 00:15:35,712
Wow, Al. You did all this
with just a hammer?
213
00:15:35,922 --> 00:15:37,992
Not just a hammer, Peg.
214
00:15:39,082 --> 00:15:40,640
Dad's hammer.
215
00:15:46,922 --> 00:15:49,755
Al, you're not really thinking
about moving away...
216
00:15:49,962 --> 00:15:51,315
...from me and the baby.
217
00:15:51,522 --> 00:15:53,433
Thinking of it? I've done it!
218
00:15:56,242 --> 00:15:58,392
Be gone, jackals!
219
00:15:59,242 --> 00:16:00,960
But, Al...
220
00:16:16,682 --> 00:16:18,240
At last...
221
00:16:18,482 --> 00:16:22,555
...I can do what every
male Bundy wants to do.
222
00:16:32,642 --> 00:16:34,121
Well, they're out of sight.
223
00:16:34,322 --> 00:16:37,155
I wonder how long it'll take
till they're out of mind.
224
00:16:38,762 --> 00:16:40,241
Done.
225
00:16:42,762 --> 00:16:44,992
Well, that must be that life I ordered.
226
00:16:51,202 --> 00:16:52,635
Hi, Al.
227
00:16:54,522 --> 00:16:57,161
Please, Al, let me stay with you.
228
00:16:57,402 --> 00:17:01,714
I'm afraid of Marcie.
She wants sex all the time.
229
00:17:02,202 --> 00:17:04,272
I mean, having sex
with your pregnant wife...
230
00:17:04,482 --> 00:17:07,042
...it's like putting gas
in the tank of a car...
231
00:17:07,242 --> 00:17:09,437
...you've already wrecked.
232
00:17:13,922 --> 00:17:16,755
Thank God mine pulls
into self-service.
233
00:17:20,602 --> 00:17:22,320
Al? Al, I'm begging you.
234
00:17:22,522 --> 00:17:25,514
I mean, you remember what it was
like when you first got married?
235
00:17:25,722 --> 00:17:29,112
Sex wasn't enough.
They also want, God help me...
236
00:17:29,322 --> 00:17:30,721
...foreplay.
237
00:17:31,922 --> 00:17:34,152
There, now, now, now. Al's here.
238
00:17:34,882 --> 00:17:37,316
Take it easy, now, big fella.
239
00:17:38,362 --> 00:17:39,954
Save me.
240
00:17:40,682 --> 00:17:43,037
All right, but just one night.
And on one condition:
241
00:17:43,242 --> 00:17:45,392
- What?
- It's just you and me...
242
00:17:45,602 --> 00:17:48,116
...and you don't tell
one single guy about this place.
243
00:17:48,322 --> 00:17:49,880
I swear.
244
00:17:50,282 --> 00:17:52,113
Hey, Bobby, throw me that.
245
00:17:53,562 --> 00:17:55,200
Tater storm.
246
00:17:57,962 --> 00:18:00,556
Maybe I wasn't being clear
when I said tell no one.
247
00:18:00,762 --> 00:18:04,152
Come on, Al. It's okay. We're
just having some good, clean...
248
00:18:04,362 --> 00:18:06,398
...normal, guy fun.
249
00:18:06,602 --> 00:18:08,752
Come on, pull my finger.
250
00:18:15,642 --> 00:18:17,633
Hey, Al, it's my arm.
251
00:18:18,562 --> 00:18:21,235
And I thought I ran with
a cool pack in high school.
252
00:18:21,442 --> 00:18:24,434
Do you mind if we turn out the lights
and tell some scary stories?
253
00:18:24,642 --> 00:18:26,872
Gee, I thought we'd strip
down to our underwear...
254
00:18:27,082 --> 00:18:29,801
...and sing "Puff the Magic Dragon."
255
00:18:31,602 --> 00:18:33,957
My underwear's got a hole in it.
256
00:18:34,482 --> 00:18:36,438
Well, then maybe you
can play the guitar.
257
00:18:38,282 --> 00:18:39,635
What's wrong with you idiots?
258
00:18:39,842 --> 00:18:43,232
Any second, the women are going
to come pouring through that door.
259
00:18:43,482 --> 00:18:46,121
Don't you know they can sense
a man smiling a mile away?
260
00:18:46,322 --> 00:18:47,994
Al, don't worry about it.
261
00:18:48,202 --> 00:18:51,160
I had all the guys promise that
they wouldn't tell anyone. Right?
262
00:18:51,362 --> 00:18:52,636
- We swear!
- We swear!
263
00:18:53,362 --> 00:18:56,832
And so I move that this room
shall be our clubhouse...
264
00:18:57,082 --> 00:18:59,994
...for our newly formed
ladies group W.O.M. B...
265
00:19:00,202 --> 00:19:04,832
...which stands for
"Women Owe Men Bubkes."
266
00:19:05,722 --> 00:19:07,917
- All in favour?
- Aye!
267
00:19:08,122 --> 00:19:10,431
- Opposed?
- Veto.
268
00:19:11,562 --> 00:19:13,439
Motion carried.
269
00:19:14,202 --> 00:19:17,751
Now, ladies, are there any complaints
that we'd like to share?
270
00:19:17,962 --> 00:19:19,873
I got hemorrhoids.
271
00:19:21,122 --> 00:19:23,716
I've got varicose veins.
272
00:19:23,922 --> 00:19:27,392
Well, I've got an itch
my husband refuses to scratch.
273
00:19:29,922 --> 00:19:31,321
Excuse me...
274
00:19:31,562 --> 00:19:34,030
...where do we go when
we're feeling emotional?
275
00:19:35,442 --> 00:19:37,478
We can use Al's bathroom.
276
00:19:40,722 --> 00:19:44,271
Thou shalt not insult my bowl
with pregnant heinies.
277
00:19:47,642 --> 00:19:48,836
Where are you going, Al?
278
00:19:49,042 --> 00:19:51,681
Ladies, and by that
I mean you guys...
279
00:19:54,122 --> 00:19:55,919
...l'm going to tear this room asunder.
280
00:19:56,122 --> 00:19:59,000
It is evil. It has been tainted,
woman-ed!
281
00:19:59,722 --> 00:20:01,997
It must be destroyed.
282
00:20:07,962 --> 00:20:09,839
Keep the gates open, Dad!
283
00:20:10,082 --> 00:20:12,471
I got a busload coming for you!
284
00:20:14,042 --> 00:20:16,351
Go for it, son.
285
00:20:29,322 --> 00:20:31,517
Well, for this special baby meeting...
286
00:20:31,722 --> 00:20:33,917
...we'd like to welcome Daddy back.
287
00:20:34,122 --> 00:20:37,478
A man who kept his garage up
for five hours.
288
00:20:37,682 --> 00:20:40,992
Just four hours longer than he
could keep his zipper up.
289
00:20:42,122 --> 00:20:43,635
Let the record show...
290
00:20:43,842 --> 00:20:46,595
...that the chairperson
shares not only the wit...
291
00:20:46,802 --> 00:20:49,475
...but also the body
of Buddy Hackett.
292
00:20:51,042 --> 00:20:52,191
Duly noted.
293
00:20:52,402 --> 00:20:53,881
Let it further show...
294
00:20:54,122 --> 00:20:57,159
...that Daddy also discovered
an important thing today.
295
00:20:57,722 --> 00:21:01,954
The true legacy of Dad's hammer
is failure.
296
00:21:02,162 --> 00:21:04,596
Dad failed with it, I failed with it...
297
00:21:04,802 --> 00:21:07,555
...and every male Bundy
who comes after me will fail with it.
298
00:21:07,762 --> 00:21:10,959
And speaking of failure,
where's the other male Bundy?
299
00:21:12,522 --> 00:21:14,752
You mean the Bushwhacker?
300
00:21:15,882 --> 00:21:17,952
No, it's the Burgermeister.
301
00:21:19,082 --> 00:21:22,358
No, it's the Buckminster.
What is the difference?
302
00:21:22,762 --> 00:21:23,956
Where is the little boil?
303
00:21:26,642 --> 00:21:28,280
Where'd you get this scar?
304
00:21:28,482 --> 00:21:30,438
Was it in Desert Storm?
305
00:21:31,802 --> 00:21:34,396
Well, I had my own little
Desert Storm, baby...
306
00:21:34,602 --> 00:21:36,558
...in the streets of New York.
307
00:21:36,762 --> 00:21:40,357
Yep. We're the warriors that
don't get the ticker-tape parades.
308
00:21:40,562 --> 00:21:42,553
Oh, Grandflasher.
309
00:21:44,602 --> 00:21:46,194
That's Grandmaster.
310
00:21:47,402 --> 00:21:49,836
Now, kiss me before I do.
311
00:22:01,202 --> 00:22:04,319
Dustbuster?
Dustbuster, are you okay?
312
00:22:05,362 --> 00:22:07,956
Shut up. I'm dying, you buffoon!
313
00:22:08,682 --> 00:22:12,072
Mommy! Mommy!
314
00:22:13,305 --> 00:22:19,851
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