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1
00:00:03,042 --> 00:00:04,944
[child giggling]
2
00:00:05,044 --> 00:00:06,785
Sorry we're late.
3
00:00:06,885 --> 00:00:09,026
Was there a lot of traffic
coming from upstairs?
4
00:00:09,126 --> 00:00:11,948
[chuckles] I blame that fancy
mattress in the guest bedroom.
5
00:00:12,048 --> 00:00:13,429
I swear, we never
used to sleep in.
6
00:00:13,529 --> 00:00:14,562
I know!
7
00:00:14,647 --> 00:00:16,735
To think I went my entire life
without knowing
8
00:00:16,820 --> 00:00:18,471
that I was
an eight medium firm
9
00:00:18,571 --> 00:00:19,912
with a ten-degree leg
elevation.
10
00:00:20,012 --> 00:00:22,274
- [scoffs]
- Go 40 degrees or go home.
11
00:00:22,374 --> 00:00:23,835
Well, I barely slept.
12
00:00:23,935 --> 00:00:25,476
I'm too excited
about my appearance
13
00:00:25,576 --> 00:00:27,557
on "Live with Kelly and Ryan."
14
00:00:27,657 --> 00:00:30,639
Really? You're going to be
on "Live with Kelly and Ryan"?
15
00:00:30,739 --> 00:00:32,520
- I had no idea!
- Seriously?
16
00:00:32,620 --> 00:00:34,057
I've been talking about it
so much...
17
00:00:34,141 --> 00:00:35,417
Oh, you're being mean.
Okay, got it.
18
00:00:35,501 --> 00:00:37,122
Aw, it's like
my dream come true.
19
00:00:37,222 --> 00:00:39,020
I know, all that hard work,
finally paying off.
20
00:00:39,104 --> 00:00:40,564
Right, your thing,
21
00:00:40,664 --> 00:00:41,981
but, also, I'm going
to be in the same room
22
00:00:42,065 --> 00:00:45,007
as Kelly Ripa
and Ryan Sea crest.
23
00:00:45,107 --> 00:00:47,024
When I was a stay-at-home mum,
they were the only adults
24
00:00:47,108 --> 00:00:48,409
that would keep me
company, so...
25
00:00:48,509 --> 00:00:49,786
Yeah, a couple times
I walked in
26
00:00:49,870 --> 00:00:51,251
on her talking back to the TV.
27
00:00:51,351 --> 00:00:52,828
[whispering]
Actually a little creepy.
28
00:00:52,912 --> 00:00:53,892
[cell phone buzzes]
29
00:00:53,992 --> 00:00:55,493
Oh, that's our landlord,
30
00:00:55,593 --> 00:00:57,975
probably calling
to give more excuses
31
00:00:58,075 --> 00:00:59,790
as to why
our apartment's not ready.
32
00:00:59,875 --> 00:01:01,673
I don't know why these
repairs are taking so long.
33
00:01:01,757 --> 00:01:04,539
It's not like the apartment
was nice before.
34
00:01:04,639 --> 00:01:08,741
Hey, don't tell them,
but the suite I booked
35
00:01:08,841 --> 00:01:11,623
at our hotel in New York
is bigger than their apartment.
36
00:01:11,723 --> 00:01:14,825
- "Our hotel"?
- So you're coming with us?
37
00:01:14,925 --> 00:01:16,546
Yeah, Tom,
I'm your publisher.
38
00:01:16,646 --> 00:01:18,403
Got to be there to make sure
the interview goes well.
39
00:01:18,487 --> 00:01:20,028
Right, right, right.
40
00:01:20,128 --> 00:01:22,269
Connor, look,
I'm so appreciative
41
00:01:22,369 --> 00:01:24,030
of everything
you've done for me.
42
00:01:24,130 --> 00:01:26,351
You've been very, very present.
43
00:01:26,451 --> 00:01:28,152
Stop.
44
00:01:28,252 --> 00:01:29,889
But I think I can handle
this one all by myself.
45
00:01:29,973 --> 00:01:32,075
- Oh.
- Yeah, great.
46
00:01:32,175 --> 00:01:34,276
- I'm really proud of you, man.
- Thank you.
47
00:01:34,376 --> 00:01:36,317
Wow.
That means a lot.
48
00:01:36,417 --> 00:01:38,719
[chuckles]
49
00:01:38,819 --> 00:01:40,159
You're still coming,
aren't you?
50
00:01:40,259 --> 00:01:42,081
- Oh, absolutely.
- I thought so.
51
00:01:42,181 --> 00:01:45,743
- So what's the bad news now...
- Another week of repairs, two?
52
00:01:47,144 --> 00:01:48,564
Oh, the apartment's
ready today?
53
00:01:48,664 --> 00:01:50,806
Like, today today?
54
00:01:50,906 --> 00:01:53,607
Wow.
No, that's... yeah.
55
00:01:53,707 --> 00:01:55,709
Uh-huh,
thank you for the update.
56
00:01:57,830 --> 00:02:00,652
- The apartment is ready.
- Oh, good.
57
00:02:00,752 --> 00:02:02,012
- Finally.
- Yeah.
58
00:02:02,112 --> 00:02:03,893
- Right?
- Back to our regular lives.
59
00:02:03,993 --> 00:02:07,215
To our bed
with zero leg elevation.
60
00:02:07,315 --> 00:02:08,976
No Bluetooth toilet.
61
00:02:09,076 --> 00:02:11,058
- Complete lack of sauna.
- Mm-hmm.
62
00:02:11,158 --> 00:02:13,139
- So what's the update?
- So...
63
00:02:13,239 --> 00:02:15,700
- It's not ready yet!
- Oh, wow.
64
00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:18,502
Yeah, I mean, you know how
these things just take forever.
65
00:02:18,602 --> 00:02:20,119
Mm-hmm, yeah,
I hope you don't mind us
66
00:02:20,203 --> 00:02:21,480
sticking around
for a little longer.
67
00:02:21,564 --> 00:02:22,945
Yeah, it's fine by me,
68
00:02:23,045 --> 00:02:24,401
but since I'm going to be
in New York
69
00:02:24,485 --> 00:02:25,906
and Gretchen's
at her mum's place,
70
00:02:26,006 --> 00:02:27,123
I told Lupe she could take
the week off.
71
00:02:27,207 --> 00:02:28,668
I'm going to visit a lover.
72
00:02:28,768 --> 00:02:30,989
Would you guys be okay
to be here all alone?
73
00:02:31,089 --> 00:02:32,790
- Don't worry about us.
- Yeah.
74
00:02:32,890 --> 00:02:34,872
- We'll manage.
- Cool.
75
00:02:34,957 --> 00:02:37,298
- Thank you.
- [chuckles]
76
00:02:37,383 --> 00:02:39,594
- Fire up that sauna.
- Mama's ready to sweat.
77
00:02:39,694 --> 00:02:43,837
- Ooh!
- Mm, mm, mm, mm.
78
00:02:43,937 --> 00:02:46,779
? Hey, hey, hey, hey ?
79
00:02:49,420 --> 00:02:51,161
Okay, uh, the kids
are at my folks'.
80
00:02:51,261 --> 00:02:53,162
I packed my neck pillow,
my back pillow,
81
00:02:53,262 --> 00:02:56,084
my feet pillows,
AKA my slippers.
82
00:02:56,184 --> 00:02:58,165
Oh, hey,
you're here early, man.
83
00:02:58,265 --> 00:03:00,367
Flight doesn't take off
for, like, five hours.
84
00:03:00,467 --> 00:03:02,408
[sighs] Tom, why don't
you have a seat?
85
00:03:02,508 --> 00:03:05,410
- Have a seat, Tom.
- Okay.
86
00:03:05,510 --> 00:03:07,411
If this is about seeing
"Aladdin" on Broadway,
87
00:03:07,511 --> 00:03:09,252
I can do that by myself.
88
00:03:09,352 --> 00:03:11,573
We think it'd be a good idea
to do some media training
89
00:03:11,673 --> 00:03:13,414
before New York.
90
00:03:13,514 --> 00:03:15,191
- What are you talking about?
- I don't need media training.
91
00:03:15,275 --> 00:03:17,056
I've been doing interviews
for weeks.
92
00:03:17,156 --> 00:03:18,393
Yeah, that's
why we're worried.
93
00:03:18,477 --> 00:03:20,378
Yeah.
94
00:03:20,478 --> 00:03:22,596
And when you're taking the
raw material of your own life
95
00:03:22,680 --> 00:03:24,781
and transubstantiating
that into fiction,
96
00:03:24,881 --> 00:03:26,038
you're faced with
the existential question of,
97
00:03:26,122 --> 00:03:27,306
what is truth?
98
00:03:27,391 --> 00:03:29,440
Reminds me of something
that Jonathan Franzen wrote
99
00:03:29,524 --> 00:03:31,241
when he was asked what role
literature plays
100
00:03:31,325 --> 00:03:33,826
in a post-democratic world.
101
00:03:33,926 --> 00:03:35,827
[chuckles]
I don't know if we're watching
102
00:03:35,927 --> 00:03:37,685
the same interview here,
guys, but I am killing it.
103
00:03:37,769 --> 00:03:39,229
Honey, let's be honest.
104
00:03:39,329 --> 00:03:41,087
You're long-winded,
and you come across as...
105
00:03:41,171 --> 00:03:43,432
Don't take this the wrong way...
A total douche.
106
00:03:43,532 --> 00:03:45,433
So what's the right way
to take that?
107
00:03:45,533 --> 00:03:47,314
And what's up with the hand?
108
00:03:47,414 --> 00:03:49,612
You know, you look like you're
working a grill at Benihana.
109
00:03:49,696 --> 00:03:51,557
- People love this.
- Look at the comments.
110
00:03:51,657 --> 00:03:53,798
All right, this person
called me a real cutie.
111
00:03:53,898 --> 00:03:54,935
Check the username
on that one.
112
00:03:55,019 --> 00:03:56,199
"TommysMommyMuriel."
113
00:03:56,299 --> 00:03:57,680
Okay, that could be anybody.
114
00:03:57,780 --> 00:03:58,937
Look, if you want
this book to sell,
115
00:03:59,021 --> 00:04:00,362
you're going to have to appeal
116
00:04:00,462 --> 00:04:01,699
to more than just our mum,
all right?
117
00:04:01,783 --> 00:04:03,124
You're going to be
on national TV.
118
00:04:03,224 --> 00:04:04,420
Let's do
a practice interview.
119
00:04:04,504 --> 00:04:06,125
I can help.
120
00:04:06,225 --> 00:04:07,702
I've seen every single episode
of "Kelly and Ryan."
121
00:04:07,786 --> 00:04:09,647
I know what
a good interview looks like.
122
00:04:09,747 --> 00:04:11,689
You want to be 2016
Jerry O'Connell,
123
00:04:11,789 --> 00:04:14,190
not 2019 Jerry O'Connell.
124
00:04:15,951 --> 00:04:18,012
- Okay, sure, I guess.
- Great.
125
00:04:18,112 --> 00:04:20,314
Let's get some duct tape
for those hands.
126
00:04:22,435 --> 00:04:24,296
You know, every time
I go to the bathroom,
127
00:04:24,396 --> 00:04:26,337
- I discover something new.
- Same!
128
00:04:26,437 --> 00:04:29,339
Did you know the rain shower
has a monsoon setting?
129
00:04:29,439 --> 00:04:32,621
- So does the bidet.
- [laughing] Oh, my God.
130
00:04:32,721 --> 00:04:33,702
Mm.
131
00:04:33,802 --> 00:04:35,342
So what should we do next?
132
00:04:35,442 --> 00:04:36,679
Maybe watch something
in the home theatre?
133
00:04:36,763 --> 00:04:40,666
- Ooh, HGTV in HDTV?
- [laughter]
134
00:04:40,766 --> 00:04:42,347
You know,
there's that new movie
135
00:04:42,447 --> 00:04:44,324
where Laura Dern throws
a glass of wine at the wall.
136
00:04:44,408 --> 00:04:47,269
- I love when she does that.
- I love when she does that.
137
00:04:47,369 --> 00:04:49,751
Hey, uh, since we're off
from school tomorrow,
138
00:04:49,851 --> 00:04:51,752
could I invite a friend
to sleep over?
139
00:04:51,852 --> 00:04:54,210
- Ooh, I don't know, sweetie.
- This is Uncle Connor's house.
140
00:04:54,294 --> 00:04:57,155
- Yeah.
- So invite more than one!
141
00:04:57,255 --> 00:04:59,076
- There's all this room!
- Yeah, go crazy!
142
00:04:59,176 --> 00:05:00,677
- Thanks.
- Yeah.
143
00:05:00,777 --> 00:05:04,720
[upbeat music playing]
144
00:05:04,820 --> 00:05:06,857
And then I come home,
and I find Mark in the kitchen
145
00:05:06,941 --> 00:05:08,442
with nothing on but an apron.
146
00:05:08,542 --> 00:05:10,923
He cooked a four-course meal
from scratch.
147
00:05:11,023 --> 00:05:13,845
And he was the dessert!
[laughter]
148
00:05:13,945 --> 00:05:16,807
I just went antiquing with
the Kardashians last weekend,
149
00:05:16,907 --> 00:05:19,849
and I got to tell you,
Khloe loves a credenza.
150
00:05:19,949 --> 00:05:22,050
- Oh, does she?
- [laughs]
151
00:05:22,150 --> 00:05:23,931
So are you gonna
introduce me or...
152
00:05:24,031 --> 00:05:26,533
I'm getting there, Tom.
153
00:05:26,633 --> 00:05:29,935
So please welcome the author
of the new novel,
154
00:05:30,035 --> 00:05:32,576
"Home Economics," Tom Hayworth!
155
00:05:32,676 --> 00:05:35,138
[light applause]
156
00:05:35,238 --> 00:05:37,259
- Hey!
- Thanks for coming by.
157
00:05:37,359 --> 00:05:38,820
Okay.
158
00:05:38,920 --> 00:05:42,862
So, Tom, I read
and loved your book.
159
00:05:42,962 --> 00:05:46,084
And I got to say,
talk about it.
160
00:05:46,804 --> 00:05:47,705
Sure.
161
00:05:47,805 --> 00:05:49,506
Uh, thank you.
162
00:05:49,606 --> 00:05:51,867
It's a roman � clef,
as the French said...
163
00:05:51,967 --> 00:05:54,085
[imitates buzzer] All right,
Tom, this answer already sucks.
164
00:05:54,169 --> 00:05:55,606
And I'm obviously speaking
as Connor here,
165
00:05:55,690 --> 00:05:57,311
because Ryan
would never be that rude.
166
00:05:57,411 --> 00:05:58,687
Try kicking it off
with a self-deprecating joke.
167
00:05:58,771 --> 00:06:00,673
Kelly will love that.
168
00:06:00,773 --> 00:06:03,314
Yeah, something like, "Are we
sure this isn't a big mistake?
169
00:06:03,414 --> 00:06:05,035
Did you mean to book
Stephen King?"
170
00:06:05,135 --> 00:06:07,156
Or, "Oh, I really stressed
out your makeup team.
171
00:06:07,256 --> 00:06:09,278
They said they'd never seen
someone so pale."
172
00:06:09,378 --> 00:06:10,839
Or like,
"They asked me backstage
173
00:06:10,939 --> 00:06:12,375
"what kind of hairstyle
I wanted, and I said,
174
00:06:12,459 --> 00:06:14,201
'Give me the full Tig Notaro.'"
175
00:06:14,301 --> 00:06:16,042
[laughing] Yes.
176
00:06:16,142 --> 00:06:18,523
- Great.
- Any others?
177
00:06:18,623 --> 00:06:20,180
"The wardrobe team didn't
know what to do with me.
178
00:06:20,264 --> 00:06:21,701
They said it was like
dressing a scarecrow."
179
00:06:21,785 --> 00:06:23,446
- A praying mantis.
- A boy on stilts.
180
00:06:23,546 --> 00:06:25,547
A stale cake pop.
181
00:06:25,987 --> 00:06:27,248
Thanks.
182
00:06:27,348 --> 00:06:29,810
So are
the characters really based
183
00:06:29,910 --> 00:06:32,091
on your actual family members?
184
00:06:32,191 --> 00:06:33,772
Well, they were
a launching point,
185
00:06:33,872 --> 00:06:35,333
but eventually
my imagination...
186
00:06:35,433 --> 00:06:36,854
- [imitates buzzer]
- Boring.
187
00:06:36,954 --> 00:06:38,615
Can I just finish
one answer, please?
188
00:06:38,715 --> 00:06:42,777
So, Tom, is this one
of those books that has themes?
189
00:06:42,877 --> 00:06:44,498
Yes.
190
00:06:44,598 --> 00:06:46,860
Uh, as I see it, the story
is really about fairness...
191
00:06:46,960 --> 00:06:48,116
- [imitates buzzer]
- Stop looking at your feet.
192
00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:50,102
- Tom, eye contact.
- Right.
193
00:06:50,202 --> 00:06:52,143
Why our self-worth
is so tied to money.
194
00:06:52,243 --> 00:06:53,320
Okay, this is
too much eye contact.
195
00:06:53,404 --> 00:06:55,025
You're freaking me out, man.
196
00:06:55,125 --> 00:06:56,882
[voice cracking] Ultimately,
I hope that the readers
197
00:06:56,966 --> 00:06:58,947
see their own families
reflected in these pages.
198
00:06:59,047 --> 00:07:00,348
Now you sound
like Marty McFly.
199
00:07:00,448 --> 00:07:01,388
Oh, my God,
I totally hear it.
200
00:07:01,488 --> 00:07:02,749
- What?
- No, come on!
201
00:07:02,849 --> 00:07:04,006
I do not sound like
Michael J. Fox.
202
00:07:04,090 --> 00:07:05,551
You know what?
Screw this.
203
00:07:05,651 --> 00:07:07,392
- This interview's over!
- Honey, come on!
204
00:07:07,492 --> 00:07:09,169
No! If anything, you guys are
just making me more nervous.
205
00:07:09,253 --> 00:07:10,330
And, yes, I know I'm all
over the place with my hands.
206
00:07:10,414 --> 00:07:11,674
We're just trying to help.
207
00:07:11,774 --> 00:07:13,091
Yeah, Tom,
this is your big moment.
208
00:07:13,175 --> 00:07:14,796
You've worked so hard
to get here.
209
00:07:14,896 --> 00:07:16,573
Okay, let's break it down
to three simple rules...
210
00:07:16,657 --> 00:07:18,638
Relax, don't ramble,
and never look at the camera.
211
00:07:18,738 --> 00:07:20,079
You do those three things,
212
00:07:20,179 --> 00:07:22,321
the books will fly
off the shelves.
213
00:07:22,421 --> 00:07:24,362
- Okay, yeah.
- Let's just keep going.
214
00:07:24,462 --> 00:07:27,664
And we'll be right back
with more Tom Hayworth.
215
00:07:29,585 --> 00:07:30,982
[softly] So, as I said to
Chelsea last week,
216
00:07:31,066 --> 00:07:33,207
I looked at her and said...
217
00:07:33,307 --> 00:07:35,048
Sorry, are we
still doing this?
218
00:07:35,148 --> 00:07:38,170
- We're on break, Tom.
- Save it for the air.
219
00:07:38,270 --> 00:07:41,972
[quirky music]
220
00:07:42,072 --> 00:07:44,013
I know I said sending
Shamiah to Windmount
221
00:07:44,113 --> 00:07:45,894
with all those rich kids
was a bad idea,
222
00:07:45,994 --> 00:07:47,776
but I feel like she's
fitting in really well.
223
00:07:47,876 --> 00:07:50,417
Yeah, looks like that's
another thing I'm right about.
224
00:07:50,517 --> 00:07:52,819
Not that I'm keeping track,
but the score is 17-3.
225
00:07:52,919 --> 00:07:54,219
It's been a bad month.
226
00:07:54,319 --> 00:07:56,060
- [laughing]
- It was so embarrassing!
227
00:07:56,160 --> 00:07:57,677
[whispering] what do you
think they're talking about...
228
00:07:57,761 --> 00:07:59,502
Their crushes?
[gasps]
229
00:07:59,602 --> 00:08:01,904
I saw you talking to Xander
in the hallway.
230
00:08:02,004 --> 00:08:04,225
- Is that a thing?
- He's cute.
231
00:08:04,325 --> 00:08:05,586
We'll see.
232
00:08:05,686 --> 00:08:06,923
He lives
in this neighbourhood.
233
00:08:07,007 --> 00:08:09,068
- Have you guys hung out?
- Uh, no.
234
00:08:09,168 --> 00:08:10,829
Um...
235
00:08:10,929 --> 00:08:12,590
we're new here.
236
00:08:12,690 --> 00:08:14,992
My mums only bought this place
a few months ago.
237
00:08:15,092 --> 00:08:16,312
[mouths word]
238
00:08:16,412 --> 00:08:17,873
They bought it
from Matt Damon...
239
00:08:17,973 --> 00:08:20,435
You know,
from the crypto commercial.
240
00:08:20,535 --> 00:08:21,836
It's not as big
as our old house,
241
00:08:21,936 --> 00:08:23,957
but we're making it work.
242
00:08:24,057 --> 00:08:25,134
[whispering] I told you
sending her to that school
243
00:08:25,218 --> 00:08:26,118
was a bad idea.
244
00:08:26,218 --> 00:08:27,639
- 16-4!
- Yeah.
245
00:08:27,739 --> 00:08:30,641
[upbeat music]
246
00:08:30,741 --> 00:08:38,685
[? ?]
247
00:08:38,785 --> 00:08:40,623
- No, that really happened.
- That really happened.
248
00:08:40,707 --> 00:08:42,608
So, anyway, if you think
your family is crazy,
249
00:08:42,708 --> 00:08:43,985
then you're going to love
reading my book.
250
00:08:44,069 --> 00:08:45,770
Oh, good stuff!
251
00:08:45,870 --> 00:08:47,747
Just say all that out there,
and you'll be great.
252
00:08:47,831 --> 00:08:49,212
[inhales deeply] Okay.
253
00:08:49,312 --> 00:08:50,468
Why don't you hop on over
to makeup?
254
00:08:50,552 --> 00:08:52,334
- You're on in 15.
- All right.
255
00:08:52,434 --> 00:08:54,551
So, um, how many of these
mugs do you think we can take?
256
00:08:54,635 --> 00:08:56,432
I'd say it's probably
a one-mug limit, yeah.
257
00:08:56,516 --> 00:08:57,817
- Aw.
- Hey.
258
00:08:57,917 --> 00:08:58,817
Hey, how was
the pre-interview?
259
00:08:58,917 --> 00:09:00,298
Great.
260
00:09:00,398 --> 00:09:01,915
She said for a novelist,
I'm surprisingly normal.
261
00:09:01,999 --> 00:09:02,940
- Ah!
- Okay.
262
00:09:03,040 --> 00:09:04,581
Okay, just remember...
263
00:09:04,681 --> 00:09:05,757
Relax, don't ramble,
don't look at the camera.
264
00:09:05,841 --> 00:09:07,502
Honey, I'm going to be fine.
265
00:09:07,602 --> 00:09:09,079
I know this is my big moment.
Not going to blow it.
266
00:09:09,163 --> 00:09:10,640
- No, of course you're not.
- I'm not worried.
267
00:09:10,724 --> 00:09:11,841
Okay, I'm going to go
get some makeup on.
268
00:09:11,925 --> 00:09:13,866
I'm going to be a star.
[laughs]
269
00:09:13,966 --> 00:09:15,667
- Oh, no.
- I'm worried.
270
00:09:15,767 --> 00:09:17,404
Yeah, I'm going to go
talk to that producer.
271
00:09:17,488 --> 00:09:19,109
Yeah, and I'm going
to see how much
272
00:09:19,209 --> 00:09:20,366
of this "Kelly and Ryan" swag
I can stuff in my purse.
273
00:09:20,450 --> 00:09:22,451
Okay.
274
00:09:23,972 --> 00:09:26,994
Hey, you guys are going
to take it easy on Tom, right?
275
00:09:27,094 --> 00:09:28,395
I don't want this turning
276
00:09:28,495 --> 00:09:30,636
into one
of those "gotcha" interviews.
277
00:09:30,736 --> 00:09:33,198
- This is daytime television.
- We don't do that.
278
00:09:33,298 --> 00:09:34,798
- Oh, good to know.
- Good to know.
279
00:09:34,898 --> 00:09:36,359
Just looking out
for my big brother.
280
00:09:36,459 --> 00:09:39,001
"Brother"? I thought
you were the publisher.
281
00:09:39,101 --> 00:09:40,682
Oh, I'm both.
282
00:09:40,782 --> 00:09:42,259
Yeah, the publishing company
was going bankrupt,
283
00:09:42,343 --> 00:09:44,524
so I bought it
so the book would come out.
284
00:09:44,624 --> 00:09:47,326
Wow, that's... impressive.
285
00:09:47,426 --> 00:09:51,008
Yeah, well, you know,
I'm a pretty generous guy.
286
00:09:51,108 --> 00:09:53,529
Thought about adopting
a dog once, actually.
287
00:09:53,629 --> 00:09:54,650
[both chuckle]
288
00:09:54,750 --> 00:09:58,292
[? ?]
289
00:09:58,392 --> 00:10:00,133
There's
our pretty little liar,
290
00:10:00,233 --> 00:10:01,934
acting like everything's fine.
291
00:10:02,034 --> 00:10:04,032
I was tossing and turning
about it all last night...
292
00:10:04,116 --> 00:10:05,577
well, for, like, five minutes.
293
00:10:05,677 --> 00:10:07,234
That mattress
really rocks you to sleep.
294
00:10:07,318 --> 00:10:08,618
It cradles you
into submission.
295
00:10:08,718 --> 00:10:10,099
Mm-hmm.
296
00:10:10,199 --> 00:10:11,556
I know it's intimidating
going to Windmount
297
00:10:11,640 --> 00:10:13,061
with all those rich kids,
298
00:10:13,161 --> 00:10:14,416
but I do not like the idea
of her lying.
299
00:10:14,500 --> 00:10:15,807
We should talk
to her about it, now,
300
00:10:15,891 --> 00:10:17,158
before Tom's interview.
301
00:10:17,243 --> 00:10:18,283
Good idea.
302
00:10:19,405 --> 00:10:20,826
Hey, Shamiah?
303
00:10:20,926 --> 00:10:22,082
Can you come out here
for a second?
304
00:10:22,166 --> 00:10:23,267
Yeah.
305
00:10:23,367 --> 00:10:25,108
This coffee's really good.
306
00:10:25,208 --> 00:10:27,710
Yeah, Connor has the beans
shipped directly from Honduras.
307
00:10:27,810 --> 00:10:29,030
You can taste it.
308
00:10:29,130 --> 00:10:31,032
- Uh, what's up?
- Oh, nothing.
309
00:10:31,132 --> 00:10:33,433
Just drinking our coffee
in front of our house
310
00:10:33,533 --> 00:10:34,954
that we bought with our money.
311
00:10:35,054 --> 00:10:36,875
[sighs] You heard me?
312
00:10:36,975 --> 00:10:38,716
Yeah.
313
00:10:38,816 --> 00:10:40,933
Look, we know that there are
not a lot of families like us
314
00:10:41,017 --> 00:10:43,519
at Windmount, but you should
be proud of who you are.
315
00:10:43,619 --> 00:10:46,280
And this could be a real
teachable moment, you know,
316
00:10:46,380 --> 00:10:47,961
for your friends.
317
00:10:48,061 --> 00:10:50,060
We can talk about income
inequality and the wage gap.
318
00:10:50,144 --> 00:10:51,983
And we can all sit down
together and talk about it.
319
00:10:52,067 --> 00:10:54,288
You don't have
to do this alone.
320
00:10:54,388 --> 00:10:56,570
- Yeah.
- You're right.
321
00:10:56,670 --> 00:10:58,571
I should come clean.
322
00:10:58,671 --> 00:11:00,952
- Thanks for having my back.
- Of course, sweetie.
323
00:11:01,312 --> 00:11:03,254
- Okay.
- Okay.
324
00:11:03,354 --> 00:11:04,734
- There's our girl.
- Yeah.
325
00:11:04,834 --> 00:11:06,576
- I knew she'd get it.
- Yeah.
326
00:11:06,676 --> 00:11:07,952
Also, did we just totally
nail that parenting moment?
327
00:11:08,036 --> 00:11:10,098
- We really did.
- [laughing] We did.
328
00:11:10,198 --> 00:11:11,779
Oh, whoops.
329
00:11:11,879 --> 00:11:14,020
Okay, I think she
must have locked by accident.
330
00:11:14,120 --> 00:11:15,781
Shamiah?
331
00:11:15,881 --> 00:11:18,262
Sweetie, I think the door
locked behind you.
332
00:11:18,362 --> 00:11:20,264
- The door.
- The door.
333
00:11:20,364 --> 00:11:21,704
- Shamiah?
- The door.
334
00:11:21,804 --> 00:11:23,666
Do you...
335
00:11:23,766 --> 00:11:25,427
- [gasps]
- Did she just...
336
00:11:25,527 --> 00:11:27,028
- Lock us out?
- She sure did.
337
00:11:27,128 --> 00:11:29,129
Both: Shamiah!
338
00:11:31,114 --> 00:11:33,178
Well, that was fun,
wasn't it?
339
00:11:33,263 --> 00:11:34,711
I mean, you never know
what's going to happen
340
00:11:34,795 --> 00:11:35,911
when Jerry O'Connell stops by.
341
00:11:35,995 --> 00:11:37,576
All right, our next guest
342
00:11:37,676 --> 00:11:40,240
is the author
of my new favourite novel,
343
00:11:40,325 --> 00:11:43,787
"Home Economics,"
which hits stores today.
344
00:11:43,872 --> 00:11:45,661
Please welcome Tom Hayworth.
345
00:11:45,761 --> 00:11:48,523
[cheers and applause]
346
00:11:50,684 --> 00:11:52,145
- So nice to meet you.
- Welcome!
347
00:11:52,245 --> 00:11:53,946
- Hi, Tom, good to have you.
- Thanks.
348
00:11:54,046 --> 00:11:56,342
I've got to tell you,
I'm so happy you're here.
349
00:11:56,427 --> 00:11:58,829
I have been raving
about your book.
350
00:11:58,929 --> 00:12:01,711
- [voice cracking]
- Wow. This is... that's heavy.
351
00:12:01,811 --> 00:12:03,498
- Oh, no.
- Full McFly.
352
00:12:03,583 --> 00:12:04,482
We're dead.
353
00:12:04,567 --> 00:12:05,729
- Sorry, I'm like...
- [clears throat]
354
00:12:05,813 --> 00:12:06,771
I'm really nervous.
355
00:12:06,856 --> 00:12:08,197
I need this interview
to go well.
356
00:12:08,302 --> 00:12:10,163
My last book bombed so hard,
357
00:12:10,616 --> 00:12:12,686
they couldn't give away
free copies to libraries.
358
00:12:12,771 --> 00:12:14,133
[laughter]
359
00:12:14,218 --> 00:12:15,959
Well, this one's
going to be a hit.
360
00:12:16,059 --> 00:12:18,396
I promise you,
I could not put it down.
361
00:12:18,481 --> 00:12:20,178
Yeah, she's been ignoring me
for days.
362
00:12:20,263 --> 00:12:22,146
[laughs] That is true.
363
00:12:22,231 --> 00:12:25,709
I especially loved
the wife character.
364
00:12:25,794 --> 00:12:28,055
She was so sharp
and so relatable.
365
00:12:28,140 --> 00:12:30,041
I wanted to be friends
with her.
366
00:12:30,216 --> 00:12:32,398
- That's me.
- She's talking about me.
367
00:12:32,491 --> 00:12:35,072
That's actually based
on my wife, Marina.
368
00:12:35,172 --> 00:12:36,689
She's here today.
[cheers and applause]
369
00:12:36,773 --> 00:12:38,354
- Oh!
- No way!
370
00:12:38,454 --> 00:12:40,115
Hi!
Hi, Marina!
371
00:12:40,215 --> 00:12:42,116
Hi!
372
00:12:42,216 --> 00:12:44,838
[panting, squeaky voice]
I'm Kelly.
373
00:12:44,938 --> 00:12:47,519
You're Mari...
Don't look at the camera.
374
00:12:47,619 --> 00:12:49,040
Mm!
375
00:12:49,140 --> 00:12:50,377
What are you doing
after the show?
376
00:12:50,461 --> 00:12:52,402
You want to brunch?
[laughter]
377
00:12:52,502 --> 00:12:53,923
I love you.
378
00:12:54,023 --> 00:12:56,245
- [awkward laughter]
- Okay. All right.
379
00:12:56,345 --> 00:12:58,646
So you clearly took
some dramatic liberties
380
00:12:58,746 --> 00:13:00,047
with the character.
381
00:13:00,147 --> 00:13:02,408
Yeah, well,
she's normally...
382
00:13:02,508 --> 00:13:05,005
better.
383
00:13:05,090 --> 00:13:07,631
Now, our producers
tell us that your brother
384
00:13:07,922 --> 00:13:10,664
is the reason your book
actually got published.
385
00:13:10,810 --> 00:13:14,911
Oh, well, uh, yeah,
I wouldn't say the reason.
386
00:13:14,996 --> 00:13:16,030
And he's here
with us right now.
387
00:13:16,114 --> 00:13:19,310
Connor Hayworth, is it true
that you saved the book?
388
00:13:19,555 --> 00:13:21,016
Oh, it was nothing.
389
00:13:21,187 --> 00:13:23,689
Just a little bro looking out
for his big bro.
390
00:13:23,953 --> 00:13:25,233
He would've done
the same for me.
391
00:13:25,362 --> 00:13:27,103
- All: Aw.
- That is so sweet!
392
00:13:27,203 --> 00:13:28,646
- Adorable.
- Come on up here.
393
00:13:28,731 --> 00:13:30,788
I'm sure our audience would
love to hear the whole story.
394
00:13:30,872 --> 00:13:32,147
- Come on up.
- Oh, I don't know.
395
00:13:32,231 --> 00:13:34,572
- Yeah, I don't know.
- Both: Oh, come on.
396
00:13:34,866 --> 00:13:37,008
Let's give it up for him,
everybody!
397
00:13:37,249 --> 00:13:38,605
You sure you want
someone onstage
398
00:13:38,689 --> 00:13:40,110
better-looking than Ryan?
[laughter]
399
00:13:40,210 --> 00:13:42,071
This guy's a charmer!
400
00:13:42,156 --> 00:13:43,898
- Come on, have a seat.
- Adorable.
401
00:13:44,013 --> 00:13:45,554
- Hi!
- Oh.
402
00:13:45,654 --> 00:13:47,521
All right.
403
00:13:47,606 --> 00:13:49,067
Wait a minute.
404
00:13:49,152 --> 00:13:51,333
Aren't you the guy
behind Drawer D'Oeuvres?
405
00:13:51,436 --> 00:13:52,737
- That's me.
- [chuckles]
406
00:13:53,018 --> 00:13:54,399
Dude, he knows
Drawer D'Oeuvres.
407
00:13:54,499 --> 00:13:55,519
Great.
408
00:13:55,619 --> 00:13:58,641
[upbeat music]
409
00:13:58,741 --> 00:14:00,402
The guy has 50 windows.
410
00:14:00,502 --> 00:14:02,083
How does not a single
one of them open?
411
00:14:02,183 --> 00:14:03,844
- Oh, I see Kelvin!
- Ooh, ooh!
412
00:14:03,936 --> 00:14:06,038
- Kelvin!
- Kelvin!
413
00:14:06,146 --> 00:14:07,246
Die, zombie!
414
00:14:07,346 --> 00:14:08,887
Die!
415
00:14:08,987 --> 00:14:10,824
Okay, he's not allowed
to play that game anymore.
416
00:14:10,908 --> 00:14:11,985
Tom's interview just started.
417
00:14:12,069 --> 00:14:13,730
Wait, why is Connor onstage?
418
00:14:13,830 --> 00:14:15,971
- Oh, no, this can't be good.
- And we're missing it.
419
00:14:16,071 --> 00:14:18,413
Both: Kelvin!
420
00:14:18,513 --> 00:14:21,054
I can't believe you spent
all that money to save Tom.
421
00:14:21,154 --> 00:14:23,136
I don't even send my sister
a Christmas card.
422
00:14:23,236 --> 00:14:24,576
- Facts.
- [laughter]
423
00:14:24,676 --> 00:14:26,097
I mean, what was
your reaction, Tom?
424
00:14:26,197 --> 00:14:27,578
It had to make you feel good
425
00:14:27,678 --> 00:14:29,115
to know that your brother
was willing
426
00:14:29,199 --> 00:14:31,020
to give you
such a generous gift.
427
00:14:31,127 --> 00:14:33,349
Oh, yeah, well, obviously,
I was very grateful,
428
00:14:33,442 --> 00:14:34,878
which actually ties
to the theme of the book,
429
00:14:34,962 --> 00:14:36,583
which is that siblings can...
430
00:14:36,683 --> 00:14:38,280
Well, actually, when he found
out, he got mad at me
431
00:14:38,364 --> 00:14:39,865
and picked a fight
on our family trip
432
00:14:39,965 --> 00:14:42,067
to Disneyland,
which I also paid for.
433
00:14:42,167 --> 00:14:43,600
- Mm.
- [laughter]
434
00:14:43,685 --> 00:14:44,998
In my defence, I didn't know
435
00:14:45,092 --> 00:14:46,834
Connor was going to venture
into publishing,
436
00:14:47,084 --> 00:14:48,375
especially since I've never
seen him crack open a book,
437
00:14:48,459 --> 00:14:50,121
- so...
- [laughter]
438
00:14:50,717 --> 00:14:52,051
Well, who has time to read
439
00:14:52,136 --> 00:14:54,133
when you're busy bailing out
your brother all the time,
440
00:14:54,217 --> 00:14:55,638
right?
[laughter]
441
00:14:55,738 --> 00:14:57,599
What was your excuse
in high school?
442
00:14:57,699 --> 00:14:59,880
I did all his homework for him.
[laughter]
443
00:14:59,980 --> 00:15:02,362
Can I... Give me the mug.
No, come on.
444
00:15:02,462 --> 00:15:04,083
You took the chair.
I get the mug.
445
00:15:04,183 --> 00:15:06,060
Guys, can we get another mug
out here, please?
446
00:15:06,144 --> 00:15:07,541
Am I going to have to put you
in a time-out
447
00:15:07,625 --> 00:15:09,126
like I do Sea crest?
448
00:15:09,226 --> 00:15:10,503
- Because I'll do it.
- She will.
449
00:15:10,587 --> 00:15:12,288
- It's my interview.
- It's my mug.
450
00:15:12,388 --> 00:15:14,769
No, no, no.
Ah!
451
00:15:14,869 --> 00:15:16,930
He wet the bed
until he was ten!
452
00:15:17,030 --> 00:15:19,212
- [audience gasps]
- Oh.
453
00:15:19,312 --> 00:15:20,773
- Guys.
- Uh...
454
00:15:20,873 --> 00:15:23,414
Well, I'm no longer
the embarrassing one.
455
00:15:23,522 --> 00:15:24,642
So, about the book...
456
00:15:24,727 --> 00:15:26,428
Yeah, it's
about three siblings
457
00:15:26,513 --> 00:15:27,951
at three different levels
of financial success.
458
00:15:28,035 --> 00:15:29,856
What are you doing, man?
We're on live TV!
459
00:15:30,198 --> 00:15:31,955
I can't believe you
told everyone I P'd the B!
460
00:15:32,039 --> 00:15:34,141
- Guys, come on!
- Stop!
461
00:15:34,241 --> 00:15:35,862
I'm so sor...
462
00:15:35,962 --> 00:15:39,264
[gasps] Oh, you're even
prettier up close, your hair.
463
00:15:39,364 --> 00:15:41,665
Hey, can we get her off set?
464
00:15:41,765 --> 00:15:43,426
Yeah, let's take a break.
465
00:15:43,526 --> 00:15:44,787
We'll be right back.
466
00:15:44,887 --> 00:15:45,988
You smell amazing.
467
00:15:46,088 --> 00:15:48,229
[? ?]
468
00:15:48,329 --> 00:15:50,430
[panting] Did it really
just take us an hour
469
00:15:50,530 --> 00:15:52,311
to circle Connor's house?
470
00:15:52,411 --> 00:15:53,952
When did he
install a hedge maze?
471
00:15:54,052 --> 00:15:55,729
I told you we should
have taken that left.
472
00:15:55,813 --> 00:15:57,554
I can't believe Shamiah!
473
00:15:57,654 --> 00:15:59,812
We always taught her that
material things don't matter.
474
00:15:59,896 --> 00:16:01,517
Why would she suddenly think
475
00:16:01,617 --> 00:16:03,438
that our life
wasn't good enough?
476
00:16:03,538 --> 00:16:05,879
I don't know, but I'm too
thirsty for this conversation.
477
00:16:05,979 --> 00:16:07,920
I could really use
that cucumber water.
478
00:16:08,020 --> 00:16:09,882
Yeah, and maybe a bubble bath
in the Jacuzzi,
479
00:16:09,982 --> 00:16:11,843
just, like,
turn the jets all the way up.
480
00:16:11,943 --> 00:16:13,944
- That sounds so nice.
- [laughing] Yeah.
481
00:16:15,985 --> 00:16:17,606
- We're the problem.
- Oh, it's us.
482
00:16:17,706 --> 00:16:19,127
- It's definitely us.
- Yeah.
483
00:16:19,227 --> 00:16:20,648
I mean,
we did delay going home
484
00:16:20,748 --> 00:16:22,129
so we could live it up here.
485
00:16:22,229 --> 00:16:23,730
What kind of message
is that sending?
486
00:16:23,830 --> 00:16:25,651
It's so much harder
to be mad at her now.
487
00:16:25,751 --> 00:16:28,533
Ladies, could you back away
from the residence, please?
488
00:16:28,633 --> 00:16:30,013
A neighbour called
489
00:16:30,113 --> 00:16:32,015
about trespassers
peeking through windows.
490
00:16:32,115 --> 00:16:34,296
- Oh.
- Yeah, well, that was us.
491
00:16:34,396 --> 00:16:35,697
But we weren't peeking.
492
00:16:35,797 --> 00:16:37,538
We were trying to open
the windows.
493
00:16:37,638 --> 00:16:38,715
- And we're not trespassing.
- Yeah, this is our residence.
494
00:16:38,799 --> 00:16:39,875
I mean, it's not our residence.
495
00:16:39,959 --> 00:16:41,700
It's our brother's residence.
496
00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:43,637
Well, it's not my brother.
It's her brother's residence.
497
00:16:43,721 --> 00:16:45,679
Right, but right now he is
on "Live with Kelly and Ryan."
498
00:16:45,763 --> 00:16:47,464
I'm not totally sure why.
499
00:16:47,564 --> 00:16:49,521
The point is, we're not
pretending this is our home.
500
00:16:49,605 --> 00:16:51,386
We know it's not our home.
501
00:16:51,486 --> 00:16:53,948
But we are trying
to get into the home, so...
502
00:16:54,048 --> 00:16:56,709
[dramatic music]
503
00:16:56,809 --> 00:16:58,510
I'm gonna need some backup.
504
00:16:58,610 --> 00:16:59,911
- Okay, come with me.
- Oh, no.
505
00:17:00,011 --> 00:17:01,872
- No, no.
- Wait!
506
00:17:01,972 --> 00:17:03,973
They're telling the truth.
507
00:17:05,534 --> 00:17:08,316
We actually live
in a tiny apartment in Oakland
508
00:17:08,416 --> 00:17:10,717
with a view of a fire escape.
509
00:17:10,817 --> 00:17:13,719
But I didn't lie
about everything.
510
00:17:13,819 --> 00:17:15,880
I do think Xander is cute.
511
00:17:15,980 --> 00:17:18,082
So you're poor?
512
00:17:18,182 --> 00:17:20,643
I mean, we're not poor,
513
00:17:20,743 --> 00:17:23,325
but compared to you, yes.
514
00:17:23,425 --> 00:17:24,926
That...
515
00:17:25,026 --> 00:17:27,007
absolutely...
516
00:17:27,107 --> 00:17:28,248
slaps.
517
00:17:28,348 --> 00:17:29,929
Wait, it slaps?
518
00:17:30,029 --> 00:17:31,586
Everyone else in our
school is, like, super rich.
519
00:17:31,670 --> 00:17:33,371
It's so boring.
520
00:17:33,471 --> 00:17:35,252
- Yeah.
- Yeah, totally.
521
00:17:35,352 --> 00:17:37,213
Oh, really?
522
00:17:37,313 --> 00:17:40,255
Well, did I mention
that we only have one bathroom?
523
00:17:40,355 --> 00:17:41,335
Like, on each floor?
524
00:17:41,435 --> 00:17:42,736
We only have one floor.
525
00:17:42,836 --> 00:17:44,097
- Shut up!
- What?
526
00:17:44,197 --> 00:17:46,418
- So you all share?
- I would die!
527
00:17:46,518 --> 00:17:47,979
Yeah, and there's
no dishwasher,
528
00:17:48,079 --> 00:17:49,740
and the windows don't open.
529
00:17:49,840 --> 00:17:51,197
And one time we found a rat
that was decapitated...
530
00:17:51,281 --> 00:17:53,983
Okay, I think
they've heard enough.
531
00:17:54,083 --> 00:17:55,544
Girls, why don't
you grab your stuff?
532
00:17:55,644 --> 00:17:57,081
Your parents will be here
any minute.
533
00:17:57,165 --> 00:17:59,166
Okay.
534
00:18:00,887 --> 00:18:02,548
Sorry for locking
you guys out.
535
00:18:02,648 --> 00:18:04,029
It's okay.
536
00:18:04,129 --> 00:18:05,766
I think we all got seduced
by this fantasy.
537
00:18:05,850 --> 00:18:07,991
Mm-hmm, but you're still
super grounded
538
00:18:08,091 --> 00:18:09,648
because you can't lock
your mums outside.
539
00:18:09,732 --> 00:18:11,873
- I get it.
- But can I...
540
00:18:11,973 --> 00:18:14,755
No, you cannot
be grounded here.
541
00:18:14,855 --> 00:18:16,196
It's time for us to go home.
542
00:18:16,296 --> 00:18:18,497
Well, I killed
all those zombies.
543
00:18:20,538 --> 00:18:22,540
What?
544
00:18:23,900 --> 00:18:25,161
Brunch.
545
00:18:25,261 --> 00:18:26,922
Kelly wanted to grab brunch
with me,
546
00:18:27,022 --> 00:18:28,363
and I completely blew it.
547
00:18:28,471 --> 00:18:30,332
Well, I was
absolutely crushing it
548
00:18:30,424 --> 00:18:32,421
until someone decided to rush
the stage and ruin everything.
549
00:18:32,505 --> 00:18:34,206
- I didn't rush the stage.
- I was invited.
550
00:18:34,306 --> 00:18:35,727
After all that talk
551
00:18:35,827 --> 00:18:37,344
about how this was going
to be my big moment,
552
00:18:37,428 --> 00:18:39,025
you just couldn't help
yourself, could you?
553
00:18:39,109 --> 00:18:40,586
You had to make it
all about you, like always.
554
00:18:40,670 --> 00:18:42,131
I was being a good sport.
555
00:18:42,231 --> 00:18:43,868
It's your fault for not
playing along with it.
556
00:18:43,952 --> 00:18:45,413
I never should let you come.
557
00:18:45,513 --> 00:18:46,710
I never should have
bought this company.
558
00:18:46,794 --> 00:18:48,795
- Hey, hey, dummies.
- Look.
559
00:18:52,117 --> 00:18:54,438
- Oh, my God.
- It's out.
560
00:18:56,840 --> 00:19:00,582
[chuckles]
It's beautiful.
561
00:19:00,682 --> 00:19:02,303
Wow.
562
00:19:02,403 --> 00:19:05,665
Is this what giving birth
feels like?
563
00:19:05,765 --> 00:19:08,947
Yeah. Sure.
564
00:19:09,047 --> 00:19:12,749
[uplifting music]
565
00:19:12,849 --> 00:19:14,750
Hey, you know what, man?
566
00:19:14,850 --> 00:19:17,752
- It was all worth it.
- Yeah.
567
00:19:17,852 --> 00:19:20,073
Sorry I ruined
the launch, though.
568
00:19:20,173 --> 00:19:22,675
No, come on.
569
00:19:22,775 --> 00:19:24,476
- We ruined it together.
- [chuckles]
570
00:19:24,576 --> 00:19:27,478
- Hey, look, look, look.
- Someone's about to buy it.
571
00:19:27,578 --> 00:19:28,818
I saw the author
and his brother
572
00:19:29,014 --> 00:19:30,394
fighting on TV this morning.
573
00:19:30,479 --> 00:19:31,920
[laughs] It was hilarious.
574
00:19:32,020 --> 00:19:33,962
Maybe you didn't mess
things up after all.
575
00:19:34,062 --> 00:19:35,643
No such thing
as bad press, right?
576
00:19:35,743 --> 00:19:37,724
I mean,
they were such idiots.
577
00:19:37,839 --> 00:19:39,730
I mean, it was maybe
the most embarrassing thing
578
00:19:39,815 --> 00:19:40,485
I've ever seen.
579
00:19:40,651 --> 00:19:42,166
Okay, pump the brakes, man.
580
00:19:42,266 --> 00:19:43,703
You know, I'd like
to see you on network TV.
581
00:19:43,787 --> 00:19:45,288
That was good content!
582
00:19:45,388 --> 00:19:47,089
- You know what?
- Give him his money back.
583
00:19:47,181 --> 00:19:48,802
- You don't get the book.
- Oh...
584
00:19:48,910 --> 00:19:50,507
- Give the book back.
- You give him his money back.
585
00:19:50,591 --> 00:19:51,812
Get the money, but...
586
00:19:51,912 --> 00:19:53,333
- Buy the book...
- No, no, don't...
587
00:19:53,433 --> 00:19:55,434
- Get the money.
- But just shut up about us.
588
00:19:56,116 --> 00:19:57,536
- [chuckles]
- Just give me the mug.
589
00:19:57,675 --> 00:19:58,912
- No, it's my interview.
- It's my mug.
590
00:19:58,996 --> 00:20:00,937
No, no, no.
591
00:20:01,037 --> 00:20:02,658
He wet the bed
until he was ten!
592
00:20:02,758 --> 00:20:04,253
It's up to 200,000 views.
593
00:20:04,338 --> 00:20:05,987
Wow, Dad.
You're famous.
594
00:20:06,072 --> 00:20:09,774
Oh, well, as long as it
helps book sales.
595
00:20:10,151 --> 00:20:14,206
- Have you read the comments?
- People are obsessed with you.
596
00:20:14,482 --> 00:20:16,183
Really?
597
00:20:16,268 --> 00:20:19,957
Okay, Camilla, "obsessed"
might be a little strong.
598
00:20:20,042 --> 00:20:21,280
Yeah, it's
about three siblings
599
00:20:21,365 --> 00:20:22,802
at three different levels
of financial success.
600
00:20:22,886 --> 00:20:24,792
What the...
What are you doing, man?
601
00:20:24,877 --> 00:20:25,628
We're on live TV!
602
00:20:25,728 --> 00:20:27,542
I can't believe you
told everyone I P'd the B!
603
00:20:27,627 --> 00:20:30,761
- Guys, come on, stop!
- I'm so...
604
00:20:30,846 --> 00:20:32,886
I have been raving
about your book.
605
00:20:32,971 --> 00:20:33,722
I'm really nervous.
606
00:20:33,807 --> 00:20:34,689
I need this interview
to go well.
607
00:20:34,773 --> 00:20:36,394
This one's gonna be a hit.
608
00:20:36,494 --> 00:20:37,761
Well, I don't know
how many fans I have,
609
00:20:37,845 --> 00:20:39,426
but, yeah, I'll be doing
some readings.
610
00:20:39,525 --> 00:20:40,899
[echoing] I'd be excited
to meet some fans.
611
00:20:40,983 --> 00:20:44,825
[suspenseful music]
612
00:20:44,875 --> 00:20:49,425
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