All language subtitles for Everything I Know About Love s01e03

[music playing]

- In every love story there
are unavoidable junctions

of change.

It could be the moment
something begins.

Hello, again.

Hi.

- It might be when everything's
been on an even keel for years.

Something happens that
takes the relationship

in a new direction.

It may be exactly
what you planned.

This change may be a surprise.

[vocalizing]

Wait.

Do I need a condom?

I've gone on the pill.

Since when?

Since last week.

Slow down.

Can you pass me that thing
from under my pillow?

Fuck, that's hot.

That's the brioche.

It's fine.

They'll leave outside.

- I didn't specify
the safe space.

Safe place.

Safe place.

Why not?

I forgot.

They'll leave it there.

[vocalizing]

- I'm just worried--

Fine.

Fine.

Go get them.

Thank you.

You're a filthy girl.

Yeah.

Yeah, I am.

- You're so desperate
for my cock we have

to fuck in a filthy toilet.

Oh, yeah, I'm disgusting.

- Sometimes only one
person in the love story

can see these crossroads.

Because sometimes it just
takes a handful of words.

- I'll give you
drinks on the house.

They forgot the guacamole.

Oh, you dirty slut.

Oh, oh, you big, posh ca--

Birdy.

What?

I love you.

Huh?

I love you too.

- Not unnoticed
that it was not--

- Do you spell cum
with an O or a U?

Different schools of thought.

Personally, I always use
come with an O as the verb,

but cum with a U as the noun.

Thanks.

Unbelievable.

You sexting that barman?

Yeah, Reggie.

- Are you going to go
on a date with him?

No.

No dates, just hookups.

Oh, he's so fit.

Yeah, but you know my plan.

I'm not falling in
love until I'm 31.

And he's going to be a
6 foot 4 libra who owns

a multimillion-pound startup.

And we're having twin
daughters.

Until then, I'm busy.

I can't be losing
my mind over men.

- Honestly, Amara, I think
you should run, like,

weekend workshops in
Cornwall for desperate women.

I've thought this before.

I'd so go.

- Because you have chosen not--

I've never sexted Neil.

What?

- I wouldn't even
know what to say.

- It is all about
finding your own voice.

You start with archetypes, and
then you build your own style

from there.

- Oh, send a sext
to Neil, please.

All right.

All right.

What do I say?

- I can't stop thinking
about your big hard cock.

Classic.

An absolute classic.

Fine.

- Maybe you should
go play some pinball.

No, I think you should leave.

Done.

Oh, my God.

I'm so excited.

- Birdy, you're
doing this as well.

No.

Why not?

We're all sending them.

What'd he say?

You flatter me.

That's that then.

Oh, that's so disappointing.

I was so hoping
he'd take the bait.

- I would just love for Neil
to have a kink, you know?

Like be into being gagged.

I love that for him.

- Totally, but
you just know he's

someone who thinks wild sex is
like a position no one enjoys

like reverse cowgirl.

Stop.

We always do this.

We turn my boyfriend
into a joke.

And then I'd still have
to have sex with him.

- You never talk
about sex with Nathan.

- No, I don't want to
be disrespectful to him.

Oh, mate.

What?

- I didn't realized that
you lost your virginities

to each other in a teen romcom.

OK, fine.

I'll tell you one thing.

Last night when we
were having sex--

Yeah.

- --he told me he loved
me for the first time.

Birdy.

Did you say it back?

Yeah.

That is so great, Birdy.

Thanks.

It was really special.

Good luck, everyone.

Right, [inaudible].

[MUSIC - NICK DRAKE, "TIME HAS
TOLD ME"]

Rare find.

A toubled cure for
a troubled mind.

And time has told me
not to ask for more.

Someday our ocean
will find its shore.

So I'll leave the ways that
are making me be what I really

don't--

Hey.

So how did Kyle's first
date with the new girl go?

What's the name again?

Bohemia.

Bohemia.

Jesus.

One of these days,
I'll make a TV show

about people called
Sharon and Claire.

It went well.

Lots of chemistry.

- Jade may have found out
they'd gone on a date.

How?

- We think Bella might
have told her last night.

Oh, fuck.

So that's off camera now.

- I think we need to get a crew
to Jade's flat this afternoon

for her reaction.

I'll write it in
the money order.

Good call.

Ribena, we need
to be in the edit.

We can get lunch there.

Maggie, I'll see you later.

Hi.

You had a tough one today?

Yeah.

Year nine?

- I totally lost
control of the class.

Yeah.

Year nines are
always the toughest.

Wait until halfway
through the year

when they choose their GCSEs.

The ones that are dropping your
subject, completely clock out.

Don't say that.

You can handle it.

- You know, I
shouldn't say this,

but I don't want to
manage their behavior.

I don't want inspire them.

I just want them to pass exams.

That's what all NQTs say.

But they'll get you in the end.

They always do.

Pub?

A few of us are clocking off.

Can't.

Too much marking, Simon.

As your boss, I approve.

As a piss-head looking
for another piss-head,

I disapprove.

And how would you know?

- Permanent thirsty
look in your eyes.

Trouble.

[music playing]

Amara?

Hi.

Shoes.

Where have you been?

Drinks with the work lot.

Ah, nice.

Do you want a tea?

No, I'm good.

I'm going to go to bed.

Night.

Night night.

Night.

Shall I mark one?

Go on then.

Listen to this guitar solo.

And the producer wants
to get rid of it.

- Did your parents ever worry
about calling you Street?

No.

Why?

It's such a risk.

Kind of name only works
if your kid ends up hot.

They're iconoclasts.

They don't care about
that sort of stuff.

And I'm not an iconoclast?

- If you make reality TV
and your family home's

got a conservatory, then no.

- How do you know anything
about my family home or my
work?

You barely ask me about my job.

- Yeah, because it's not
what you really want to do.

I don't know that yet.

I've only been doing
it a couple of months.

Sorry.

I just assumed you
didn't want to build

a career from something that
is violently tearing apart

the fabrics of
humanity at the seams.

Cheers.

Oh, unless you do.

You evil, horrible goddess.

Is this Nick Drake?

- You've been
listening to the CD.

- Mm-hmm.

I like him.

You have to make me a
greatest hits compilation.

- No, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no.

Greatest hits are
for melts.

You need to listen to an
album chronologically--

every song, even
the weaker ones.

Albums are like humans,
and those wonky bits

are what make it weirdly
perfect and completely
beautiful.

Street.

Maggie.

I love you.

No, you don't.

Shut up.

I'm sorry, Maggie.

But why would you say that?

Shut up.

- Oh, you really are so,
so bored, aren't you?

Where are you going?

I need to piss.

Hey.

- Nell, I'm having
a nervy-b.

What's happened?

Where are you?

- I just told Street I love
him.

And what did he say?

- He laughed and
told me I don't.

Right.

I'm so upset.

You're not upset.

You're embarrassed.

- I can't believe he
didn't say it back.

I'm going to have to leave.

I can't even see him again.

- Maggie, listen,
you don't love him.

I think I do.

- No, you thought you love
that creepy club promoter.

You thought you love the head
of the anarchist society at uni

with the Mohawk.

What do these men
have in common?

You.

You're the romance.

You make everything
magic, not them.

OK.

- So just be chill
and laugh off.

OK.

I love you.

Bye.

Nell?

Yes?

- Please don't tell Amara
and Birdy about this.

I won't.

I love you.

Stop saying that.

[MUSIC - MYSTERY JETS, "TAKE ME
WHERE THE ROSES GROW"]

- You pick me up in the
evening.

I wear a new disguise.

I've been hiding
out through the days

so I don't get caught
in this web of lies.

When I first saw you, you
were cool as lemon eyes.

You could make my blood run
cold and warm me up before
sunrise.

But I can't understand what
it takes to keep my mind.

Ohh.

That's new.

Yeah.

When did you get that?

Nathan bought it for me.

Oh, why didn't you tell me?

Did I have to tell you?

- You hate it when
I buy new clothes

and don't show them to you.

And you act so betrayed when I
come downstairs in a new vest

top.

What well even is it?

It's a charm bracelet.

It's funky.

It's not funky.

It's really special
and personal.

What's that?

An owl.

Why an owl?

Because I'm called Birdy.

- Yeah, but not because
you look like an owl.

It's because you look like a
little sparrow or a budgie.

- Well, he doesn't
see me as a budgie.

He sees me as an owl.

Anyway, it's woodland themed.

- I think it's nice he
buys you so many presents.

It's like you're in a game
show.

What will be next month's
prize?

[phone ringing]

- Are you not
going to answer him?

No.

What's going on with you two?

Nothing.

[MUSIC - S CLUB 7,
"DON'T STOP MOVING"]

Yeah, come on.

Oh, oh.

DJ got the party started.

There's no end in sight.

Everybody's moving.

Hi, girls.

Hi, Mummy.

- How are things
going at the salon?

Good, thank you.

I have to tell
you, my clients are

absolutely obsessed with
that TV program of yours.

It's all they talk about.

Oh, thank you.

- Bet your mom and dad
are proud and relieved

that you're all sorted.

All right, Mum.

- I just thought that
the meaning of temping

was that it was meant
to be temporary.

Birdy's got big news though.

Have you?

No, I haven't.

Yes, you do.

Birdy's got a boyfriend.

What?

Yeah, and his name's Nathan.

Nathan?

Well, I cannot wait to meet
him.

Smith.

Nathan Smith.

- Mum, I--

Smith.

Nathan Smith.

I was going to say something.

Oh, when?

When you send me the
invite to your wedding

where you roast a
big pig on a lawn

and I have to wear a pastel
dress with a matching hat?

- This is why I didn't
tell you because I

knew you'd overreact like this.

Oh, oh, I'm overreacting.

Well I cannot wait to tell
grandma who was smuggled out

of Austria as a baby with every
piece of family jewelry in her

nappy.

- Jesus, every time
you tell this story,

there's another
item in the nappy.

It's like Mary Poppins'
handbag.

What else was in there?

The Hala plate?

The Kiddush cup?

- I don't want to talk
about this right now.

- Breaking news
[inaudible] news at 12:00.

Thanks.

- All the latest hits--

Stanmore FM.

Thanks, Jo.

All right.

See you.

Thanks, Jo.

Darling girl.

Hello.

Oh, you look exhausted.

Doesn't she look
exhausted, Graham?

- Burning both
ends of the candle.

- Have you been sleeping
enough?

- She can catch up
on her sleep here.

It is so hot in this house.

It's like hotter than Thailand.

- No, I don't think that's
true.

It must be 30 degrees.

Wait.

Wait till you see this.

Graham, not again.

- What is the
temperature in Thailand?

- It's about 29 degrees
in Bangkok, Thailand.

Isn't that amazing?

And you can do it for anything.

What is the name of
Billy Joel's wife?

[inaudible].

Final answer.

- It's May, and the piglets
are starting to explore.

- To expose a dodgy beauty
salon that's got himself

into a little bit of
hot water or should that

be hot wax because their
customers have the third degree

burns to prove it.

This is Dodgy Dealers and thi--

- I've put four sugars
in to give you energy.

I do feel very weak.

- Get that down you, then
you can have a nice bath

and get changed.

Do we have to go?

Why are we all playing for
Nigel and Nicky to go on
holiday?

Not going on holiday.

They're doing charity
work out there.

We're helping them raise
money to build a dam.

- Fine, fine, I'll go to
your white savior party.

Exactly, yes.

We'll have fun.

Do you really have to wear
that?

You said smart casual.

- You were stuffing yourself
with ham from the fridge

this afternoon.

- Well, why is Dad
allowed with that then?

No, he's not wearing it out.

Where did you even get it?

The online gift shop.

I thought it was quite smart.

Take it off.

Everyone's already seen it.

- Douglas and Lynn
haven't seen it.

Great Britain might not host
again in your lifetime, Maggie.

I can't understand why you
wouldn't volunteer with all

those other young people.

I know you're bored
of me saying it,

but you're going to miss a
once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

- Remember, Graham, don't
offer Mike a drink tonight.

- Why can't you
offer him a drink?

- Well, he's been having
a bit of a tough time.

Six months sober on
one of those programs.

- But of course
now they're saying

that actually a glass
of red wine a day

can halve your
chances of cancer.

Could I have three?

10, Graham.

Oh, make that 10.

Ah, yes, that's more like it.

Come on.

Everybody get over
here [inaudible]..

[music - psy, "gangnam style"]

The Gangnam Style.

Here we go.

To the right.

And the left.

Gangnam [inaudible].

Here we go.

Yes.

I want to hear you.

Hands in the air.

Come on, sweetheart.

Gangnam Style.

Gangnam Style.

Hey, sexy lady.

Oh, don't see those.

They're burnt.

So?

It's carcinogenic.

- You and dad are
obsessed with cancer.

It's like it's
your favorite band.

Mike.

Oh.

Have you met my brilliant
daughter, Maggie?

Hello, Maggie.

- She's the TV producer for
a hugely successful show.

- It's really not
that successful.

And I'm barely a TV producer.

I mostly just feel like
a woman with a computer.

That's not true.

- Well, your mom
and dad are very

proud of you and your brother
and your computer of course.

- Mike, sweetheart, have
you bought your tickets

for the raffle?

- Darling, darling,
this is Cormac.

Cormac, this is my
daughter, Maggie.

She's a TV producer.

Really?

- She could have been
anything she wanted to be.

Could have gone to Oxford.

Didn't want to.

Could have been prime minister.

Didn't want to.

You got the right idea.

Mike.

You're not leaving, are you?

No, no, no.

Just having a smoke.

Double parked.

Do you want one?

Fuck.

Sorry, I forgot.

- So your parents told you
then?

They did.

How you doing?

Feel fine.

Like a debutante,
divorced man in suburbia

like flies around
a big hot turd.

Do you mind me drinking this?

Please.

I live in the gin belt,
I'm used to it.

No problem at all.

Mind you, it'd be better
if you had any gear.

I swear it's in here.

I'm sure it's in this handbag.

Leftover from a party.

- Are you an angel
that was sent here?

- Ah-huh!

I love you.

What the fuck, Mike?

What?

That was quite only one.

We were going to split it.

Oh, shit.

I'm so sorry.

I'm so sorry.

I just got excited.

It reminds me of going to all
those raves in the fields

off the M-25.

- You were in your
40s in the '90s, Mike.

Grow up.

Have you got any Malibu?

[music playing]

[inaudible].

Head over heels and toe to toe.

[MUSIC - CALVIN
- HARRIS,"ACCEPTABLE IN THE 80
- S"]

- I've do things for you if you
were born in the 80s, the 80s.

I've got hugs for you if
you were born in the 80s.

Yeah.

It was acceptable in the 80s.

It was acceptable at the time.

It was acceptable in the 80s.

It was acceptable at the time.

- It's raffle time,
ladies and gentlemen.

And we have the ear wax removal
session goes to ticket number

521.

That's 521.

Oh, there you are.

We've been looking for you.

We want you to talk to Alan.

He's writing a sitcom about
his time as a dentist,

and we said you'd know someone
at your production company.

- No offense, Alan, but I don't
give a fuck about your sitcom.

And I would hazard a guess,
no one else will either.

Maggie.

- Would you both stop being
so proud of me all the time.

I don't know when you're going
to realize I'm not that great.

And your endless
love for me has left

me completely
unprepared for the world

and the millions
of people who think

I'm ugly and stupid and shit.

She's overtired.

- And I'm probably going
to need loads of therapy

to sort it all out
because you two encouraged

me to follow my
idiotic dreams instead

of getting a proper job.

- All you lovers in the
house, it's slow dance time.

[inaudible]

Sorry, sweetheart.

It's our song.

Fine, I'm going home.

[MUSIC - ROXY MUSIC, "MORE THAN
THIS"]

- I could feel at the time
there was no way of knowing.

Fallen leaves in the night.

Who can say where
they're blowing?

As free as the wind,
hopefully learning.

Why the sea--

Look, I'm sorry, Alan.

If you want to be a writer,
you have to toughen up.

Yeah.

More than this.

You know there's nothing.

More than this.

Hi, it's Maggie.

Leave a message.

- You're ignoring me,
and I don't know why.

But I was just ringing
to say you really do have

the best tits I've ever seen.

They're like the
kind you see when

you go around your mates
house as a teenager

and you find photographs of
his hot mum sunbathing topless

on a Greek island in the '70s.

So yeah.

That's what you are.

Absolutely timeless.

Call me back.

[music playing]

[inaudible].

- I don't know exactly what
happened with you and Mike

last night.

And for the sake of the book
club we're both in, frankly,

I don't want to know.

The guy's lost everything.

And now he has to start at
square one with his sobriety.

He asked me for drugs.

- I don't want to
know the details.

You were drunk as well.

- I just want you to know
that your actions have

repercussions.

Life can't be fun all the time.

You can't do whatever you
want because you're bored

or because you find it
funny or whatever it is.

What is it?

Maybe you're right.

Maybe we haven't been
hard enough on you.

I didn't say that.

I said you overloved me, which
is a totally different thing

and is arguably--

Stop making excuses!

Whatever you think
about parenting,

we certainly did
not bring up a brat.

You are 24.

You have to take
some responsibility.

I'm Sorry.

I'm really, really sorry.

And I won't do anything
like that ever again.

[music - lucy rose, "shiver"]

- A member of the cruciferous
vegetables family,

eight letters, begins with a K.

A K.

- And we sewed all the
holes we had to breathe.

Kohlrabi.

To make the other one leave.

You clever girl.

The way you looked at me.

And I miss the way you made
me feel when we were alone.

When we were alone.

He's logged on.

Shut up.

What do I say?

- Say I'm with my
friend, Maggie.

Do you have any friends for
her?

Where's he from again?

Milton Keynes.

He's with his friend, Charlie.

Oh, my God.

What does that mean?

- Rub your nunu on
this piece of paper.

Hello.

Hi, Joan.

It's Maggie.

I was just wondering--

Belinda, it's for you.

Thanks.

Hello.

Hi.

Oh, hi.

How are you?

Fine.

- I'm sorry I told
your mum about Nathan.

- She's barely spoken
to me all weekend.

Isn't it a relief in a way?

Like it's not a secret anymore.

- No, don't pretend like you
were trying to do me a favor.

You're right.

I knew exactly
what would happen.

And I don't know why I did it.

It was your thing to
tell in your own time.

How was your weekend?

Uh, mixed.

I sort of got off
with my parents friend

who's a recovering alcoholic.

And I sort of gave him a
pinger.

- What's up with
you at the moment?

I feel like you're not
really talking to me.

- My mum lost her lig at me and
gave me a proper telling off.

Good.

Someone has to.

- I think I'm jealous,
and I'm finding it hard

that you're going ahead
and doing something

I've never done before because
we normally do everything

together.

Nothing will change, Maggie.

- That's only a thing people
say when everything's changing.

I'm sorry.

I'm going to be
more of an adult.

It's OK.

- Do you remember when we
used to sit on your mom's

computer together
for hours having

cyber sex with random boys?

Yeah, unfortunately.

God.

We're such randy little freaks.

Can you imagine telling
your 14-year-old self

that one day a boy would
tell you he loved you.

- I still can't get over the
fact we lost our virginities.

- It's really, really
great that you're in love.

It's a hard thing to
find when it's real.

Thank you.

I love you.

I love you too.

[knock on door]

Come in.

- The thing is--

the thing that you have to
understand, we're survivors.

And you can't just skip over
this huge part of who you are.

You can't just
throw it all away.

He's my first boyfriend.

We're only three months in.

I just don't
understand why there

has to be so much drama just
because he's not Jewish.

No, I know.

And I am sorry that I
reacted the way that I did.

And I really do look
forward to meeting him.

Thanks, mum.

- But not on a Friday,
and not with grandma.

You know, and as you said,
it probably won't last.

I didn't say that.

Hey.

Where's Nathan?

Gym.

A convention for board
short enthusiasts.

God knows.

Where have you been?

You disappeared.

I went to my mum and dad's.

Come here.

I missed you.

- I don't think we should
see each other anymore.

Why?

- Because I think we've got
the end of whatever this was.

- But-- but I really like you.

- You're only saying
that because I told you

I loved you and then
ignored you for 48 hours.

And I really can't
believe you have

to act that mad to make
a man obsessed with you.

It's not that.

I love hanging out with you.

Do you?

Because you never
come to my house.

- I made a decision in 2008
to never go to Camden again.

- And you've never
listened to any

of the songs I've sent you
or read any of the articles.

I don't think you care about my
taste in things or my thoughts

on things.

And you don't know anything
about my work or my friends.

- I didn't know you
were so annoyed with me.

I'm not.

Honestly, I'm not.

I thought I was having fun.

- I think I just feel
things in real time.

I'm not so in my head
about us like you are.

I don't know what
I'm trying to say.

I just don't want
to stop seeing you.

- I think I left some
things in your room.

[MUSIC - BILLIE MARTEN, "MORE
THAN THIS"]

- I could feel at the time
there was no way of knowing.

Fallen leaves in the night.

Who can say where
they're blowing?

- Sometimes the
change in a love story

happens when you can no
longer ignore reality.

So you say goodbye
to the person,

accepting that
they may have been

the work of your imagination.

More than this.

There's nothing more than this.

Tell me one thing.

More than this.

Bye.

There is nothing.

It was fun.

It was fun for a while.

There was no way of knowing.

Like a dream in the night.

Who can say where we're going?

No care in the world.

Maybe I'm learning why
the sea on the low tide

has no way of turning.

More than this.

There's nothing.

More than this.

Tell me one thing.

More than this.

There is nothing.