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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:04,000 "" 2 00:00:05,506 --> 00:00:07,090 Pete, beer me 3 00:00:13,555 --> 00:00:14,681 Sharon... 4 00:00:29,696 --> 00:00:31,031 YOU'RE WELCOME! 5 00:00:31,532 --> 00:00:33,075 THANK YOU! 6 00:00:45,754 --> 00:00:49,091 Lets go guys, I'm double-parked, and the ambulance driver's gettin' ticked! 7 00:00:51,426 --> 00:00:54,054 Shhh! Just wait This is important 8 00:00:54,847 --> 00:00:55,931 It's Xena 9 00:00:57,516 --> 00:01:03,564 - The Warrior Princess. She's unbelievable - Yeah, I'll say. It's 1603 and she's got implants 10 00:01:04,106 --> 00:01:06,441 And right now they're in peril 11 00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:13,031 Which is why the Celtics are the single greatest franchise in NBA history! 12 00:01:13,323 --> 00:01:17,744 Hey, now we have something to celebrate That is the one thousandth time you've told me that! 13 00:01:19,580 --> 00:01:21,456 Come on, Berg, let's go, let's go, let's go! 14 00:01:21,707 --> 00:01:25,794 - Pete, the game doesn't start for over two hours! - Yeah, I know, but you need to be there for warm-ups! 15 00:01:25,919 --> 00:01:27,629 - Why?! - 'Cause, we're playing the Bulls! 16 00:01:28,046 --> 00:01:30,174 The Celtics...are playing the Bulls 17 00:01:31,717 --> 00:01:34,261 You...didn't make the team 18 00:01:34,970 --> 00:01:36,096 Okay, can we please go?? 19 00:01:36,471 --> 00:01:41,226 - You watch the Celtics, I'll watch Xena, and we'll meet up later - Berg, what are you talking about? You have to go! 20 00:01:42,186 --> 00:01:44,479 Double-parked!! Ambulance still blocked!! 21 00:01:45,772 --> 00:01:47,107 They're sliding in the gurney!! 22 00:01:47,482 --> 00:01:49,568 Berg, you have to go 23 00:01:50,110 --> 00:01:54,740 And believe me, I'd love to, but...Xena really needs me 24 00:01:55,032 --> 00:01:57,659 Look, Berg, I promise This time you'll have fun! 25 00:01:58,327 --> 00:01:59,786 That's what you said last time 26 00:02:00,162 --> 00:02:03,290 Well, I'm sorry, you just weren't showing enough Celtic pride! 27 00:02:04,291 --> 00:02:08,504 It was an exhibition game! Against the Globetrotters! 28 00:02:08,879 --> 00:02:10,422 They were supposed to lose!! 29 00:02:10,756 --> 00:02:14,426 - Still, I think that the team needed your support -- - Pete, let's face it 30 00:02:16,011 --> 00:02:28,440 You suck the fun right out of it! I mean, when the Celtics win, you're an obnoxious, babbling fool -- and if they lose, you pout for three hours and listen to...Air Supply!! 31 00:02:29,191 --> 00:02:30,108 We're not gonna lose!! 32 00:02:31,151 --> 00:02:32,986 ♪We♪...are not playing 33 00:02:33,737 --> 00:02:39,826 We're just sitting there, eating and drinking, for two hours, while you pretend you're the coach from seventy-five rows back 34 00:02:39,952 --> 00:02:43,038 Ha ha! Atta boy Berg, keep that fire up!! Okay, team! 35 00:02:44,039 --> 00:02:46,416 - Let's get 'em!! - Woooo! Celtics! 36 00:02:46,625 --> 00:02:48,043 Green fingernail polish, that's a start 37 00:02:48,752 --> 00:02:50,379 Okay, I'm wearing green panties! 38 00:02:53,131 --> 00:02:55,676 Oh, c'mon, Berg, Berg, Berg... 39 00:02:56,969 --> 00:02:58,095 I need you there... 40 00:02:59,304 --> 00:03:03,141 All right, just stop giving me this 'Spanky forgot to feed Petey' look 41 00:03:04,726 --> 00:03:05,602 I'll be there for tip-off 44 00:03:19,491 --> 00:03:21,660 Well, today...we learned all about the letter 'B' 45 00:03:22,119 --> 00:03:26,999 We baked bread, we studied butterflies, the student of the day was Billy Bumstead 46 00:03:28,083 --> 00:03:30,460 Oh? Well, I learned all about the letter 'S' today 47 00:03:30,878 --> 00:03:37,467 That I'm a self-serving sellout who's giving our environment a super slaughtering All, for a sports car and a salary! 48 00:03:37,759 --> 00:03:39,303 That was excellent! 49 00:03:40,470 --> 00:03:42,931 - You know, I envy you - Yeah, right... 50 00:03:43,182 --> 00:03:46,810 No, I'm serious. I mean, you wake up every morning looking forward to your job 51 00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:50,689 - Yeah, for the most part - You come home everyday feeling good about yourself 52 00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:53,150 - I try - You make a difference in kids' lives! 53 00:03:53,442 --> 00:03:55,694 - I make $18,000 a year - Ewwww! 54 00:03:56,904 --> 00:03:57,696 Hey! Snacks! 55 00:03:58,197 --> 00:04:00,532 C'mon, c'mon, DEFENSE! 56 00:04:01,366 --> 00:04:02,910 Thanks -- Come on, pick it up! 57 00:04:03,410 --> 00:04:09,458 - Lanes! Lanes! Why aren't they staying in the lanes?! - I don't know, I'm sorry! 58 00:04:10,083 --> 00:04:11,335 - Oh, hey Pete look! - What, what, what, what?? 59 00:04:11,668 --> 00:04:16,298 There, there, there! Way, way down there! I think it's a basketball game!! 60 00:04:17,633 --> 00:04:21,470 All right, look, there is no such thing as a bad seat at a Celtic game 61 00:04:21,720 --> 00:04:26,391 Yeah, sure -- because two miles below us is the single greatest franchise in NBA history 62 00:04:26,642 --> 00:04:27,768 Yeah, the Bulls 63 00:04:28,727 --> 00:04:30,187 Come on, come on -- slow it up! 64 00:04:30,562 --> 00:04:32,314 SLOW IT UP!! 65 00:04:41,073 --> 00:04:41,949 Yeah, see, see? 66 00:04:42,074 --> 00:04:50,040 This is why these are the best seats in the house! Up near the rafters, next to the Celtic championship banners *this* is where the real diehards are 67 00:04:50,290 --> 00:04:51,166 Isn't he cute?? 68 00:04:52,417 --> 00:04:54,503 Come on -- Murphy was all over him!! 69 00:04:55,796 --> 00:04:58,841 - DEFENSE!! DEFENSE!! - Not now 70 00:04:59,466 --> 00:05:01,176 We have the ball 71 00:05:10,727 --> 00:05:13,522 Man, I can't believe Berg is missing this! 72 00:05:15,524 --> 00:05:19,528 One...more time, and the Tooth Fairy's gonna owe you 24 bucks! 73 00:05:21,029 --> 00:05:28,996 Ladies and gentlemen, please give a welcome to this evening's lucky ticket holder, who will watch tonight's game from the Celtic bench.. 74 00:05:29,454 --> 00:05:32,166 Mr. Michael Bergen! 75 00:05:34,001 --> 00:05:37,462 No, no, no, no! No! He didn't even want to come! 76 00:05:39,089 --> 00:05:42,009 Hi Pete! I made it! 77 00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:55,355 - Worst game I ever saw in my life - What, are you kidding?! They won with a three-pointer at the buzzer 78 00:05:55,731 --> 00:05:56,773 Listen to me! 79 00:05:59,318 --> 00:06:02,863 Hey, hey! 80 00:06:03,989 --> 00:06:08,869 There he is! My man, Berg -- the Celtics' sixth man out of Beacon Street Pizza!! 81 00:06:09,494 --> 00:06:13,081 Bill...BILL! It's okay...let's not make it a big thing 82 00:06:13,707 --> 00:06:20,297 Do you believe it? You, the biggest Celtic fan in the world, and Berg winds up on the bench Heh-heh! 83 00:06:22,257 --> 00:06:24,593 Bill, you have a keen sense of irony 84 00:06:25,302 --> 00:06:26,637 All right, what's with him? 85 00:06:26,970 --> 00:06:31,225 I think he's still a little miffed at Berg's big ol' Mardi Gras head on the scoreboard 86 00:06:32,434 --> 00:06:35,145 The Jumbotron adds four hundred pounds to your face! 87 00:06:39,149 --> 00:06:42,694 Oh, I think it's past somebody's bedtime... 88 00:06:44,321 --> 00:06:50,035 Look, Pete...I tried to get you down there with me I begged the PR guy, only I didn't know where you were sitting 89 00:06:51,370 --> 00:06:53,413 Did you ever think of looking at the ticket? 90 00:06:54,164 --> 00:06:59,211 He took the ticket once he knew that I was...well, the lucky one 91 00:07:00,671 --> 00:07:04,800 - Honey, you can't blame him for being the lucky one! - Yeah, but I can hate him for it 92 00:07:06,134 --> 00:07:12,808 This behavior right here is *exactly* why I wanted to stay home Pete, look me in the eye and tell me you're really upset 93 00:07:16,895 --> 00:07:20,190 - I think I see a smile coming on! - Nooo! 94 00:07:21,775 --> 00:07:25,529 Heh, heh, heh and you sat right next to Larry Bird! 95 00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:28,031 Your favorite player 96 00:07:29,324 --> 00:07:32,578 Bill, do you have some kind of stake in pissing Pete off? 97 00:07:33,328 --> 00:07:37,791 Heh, heh... LARRY BIRD! Heh, heh, heh... 98 00:07:38,500 --> 00:07:43,463 Well, Larry now coaches another team, but...they had the night off 99 00:07:43,964 --> 00:07:45,465 Really? I wasn't aware of that 100 00:07:47,342 --> 00:07:48,594 Go on, Berg! Go on! 101 00:07:49,136 --> 00:07:54,349 Tell him! Tell him what you talked to Larry Bird about for two hours! Tell him! 102 00:07:54,808 --> 00:07:56,935 Well, strangest thing 103 00:07:57,352 --> 00:07:59,438 Larry and I both went to Camp Pomahack 104 00:08:00,689 --> 00:08:04,526 But get this The Camp Pomahack Larry went to was in Indiana 105 00:08:04,902 --> 00:08:07,446 Mine...was in Albany! 106 00:08:10,324 --> 00:08:12,201 Two Camp Pomahacks! 107 00:08:13,785 --> 00:08:15,078 I don't care! Anybody? 108 00:08:16,413 --> 00:08:19,708 Pete, I found you that photo of Larry Bird on the Mike Douglas show... 109 00:08:21,460 --> 00:08:23,337 My life is now complete 110 00:08:24,546 --> 00:08:27,216 Hey, wait! Charo! And Gabe Kaplan! 111 00:08:29,092 --> 00:08:35,015 I can't believe you got to sit on the bench Man, you had thousands of Celtics fans cheering you on 112 00:08:36,642 --> 00:08:40,229 It meant *nothing* to you. Berg, I've been dreaming of that my whole life 113 00:08:40,896 --> 00:08:42,272 I had a dream once... 114 00:08:44,650 --> 00:08:50,405 to dance. I wanted so badly to join in this one company I could taste it. 115 00:08:50,822 --> 00:08:53,992 Sure enough, one thing led to another I got the audition of a lifetime 116 00:08:57,246 --> 00:08:58,914 It didn't end there, did it? 117 00:09:01,542 --> 00:09:02,626 Why, no 118 00:09:03,877 --> 00:09:08,674 With my unique blend of classical ballet and raw stripper moves 119 00:09:10,050 --> 00:09:16,014 I got them dancing on their chairs Best of all, I never had to go back to that damn welding job! 120 00:09:20,269 --> 00:09:20,978 What a feeling! 121 00:09:23,939 --> 00:09:25,607 Okay, that's it 122 00:09:25,983 --> 00:09:28,861 - Look, we're staying at your place tonight - Okay, sweetie, that's fine 123 00:09:29,069 --> 00:09:31,488 Uh, night, you guys...it was...really fun 124 00:09:34,533 --> 00:09:38,161 Okay...can you believe the fart she cut in the car?! 125 00:09:41,832 --> 00:09:45,377 Forget her...is Pete acting out or what? 126 00:09:46,003 --> 00:09:48,505 Oh, come on Berg Whether you mean to or not you ruined it for him! 127 00:09:48,922 --> 00:09:53,260 - I didn't even want to go! - Well...maybe you can figure out some way to make it up to him 128 00:09:55,929 --> 00:09:57,181 What would Xena do? 129 00:10:02,477 --> 00:10:09,318 Now...is it just me, or is he dancin'...like he's never...danced before? 130 00:10:18,785 --> 00:10:20,204 Berg? 131 00:10:25,626 --> 00:10:28,462 Berg! Huh 132 00:10:36,386 --> 00:10:38,639 BERG!!!!! 133 00:10:40,891 --> 00:10:42,392 This is great 134 00:10:42,851 --> 00:10:44,144 I knew you'd love it 135 00:10:44,811 --> 00:10:50,484 Berg, this is, without a doubt, the best gift I have ever gotten 136 00:10:51,693 --> 00:10:53,070 Naaah... 137 00:10:54,029 --> 00:10:55,614 How on earth did you get it? 138 00:10:56,198 --> 00:10:59,826 Remember the MacGyver when he had to get into that federal vault using only a stapler and a Q-Tip? 139 00:11:02,746 --> 00:11:04,206 YES! 140 00:11:05,666 --> 00:11:08,836 This is amazing! It's fantastic! 141 00:11:09,837 --> 00:11:11,588 It's a felony! 142 00:11:11,922 --> 00:11:13,382 Only if they find out 143 00:11:13,882 --> 00:11:16,176 Berg, this has to go back It belongs to the Celtics! 144 00:11:16,552 --> 00:11:19,054 - Says who? - Says the banner 145 00:11:21,390 --> 00:11:23,559 Berg, look, they earned it, not me 146 00:11:24,142 --> 00:11:28,564 Oh, I get it. So all of a sudden you're...*not* on the team 147 00:11:30,941 --> 00:11:32,192 C'mon Berg, get real 148 00:11:32,860 --> 00:11:35,988 Think of all the aggravation you've been through watching their games 149 00:11:36,321 --> 00:11:37,281 You're telling me 150 00:11:37,614 --> 00:11:41,660 Think of the hours you've spent...in line, waitin' for tickets in the snow 151 00:11:42,286 --> 00:11:46,290 Yeah.. One time, I got home, and my body temperature was seventy 152 00:11:49,459 --> 00:11:54,256 Pete, you deserve this as much as anyone... 153 00:11:54,756 --> 00:12:02,014 ..and on behalf of the Boston Celtics organization, I hereby...want you to have this 154 00:12:06,518 --> 00:12:07,686 Berg, I don't know... 155 00:12:08,687 --> 00:12:12,900 Pete, come on, it's just a glorified bedspread! 156 00:12:13,650 --> 00:12:15,068 They'll never know it's gone! 157 00:12:15,986 --> 00:12:23,493 More on the outrage sweeping Boston over the championship banner stolen last night. We go now to Jeff Colly with tonight's top sports story. Jeff? 158 00:12:23,911 --> 00:12:31,418 A city violated -- legions of Celtic faithful are carrying signs, pleading for the return of the 1981 championship banner 159 00:12:31,835 --> 00:12:36,757 Some offer forgiveness for its safe return, but threats of retaliation can also be heard 160 00:12:38,675 --> 00:12:39,551 Do you believe this? 161 00:12:39,635 --> 00:12:40,761 What? 162 00:12:40,928 --> 00:12:45,432 Some lunatic broke into the Fleet Center last night and stole the '81 championship banner 163 00:12:46,517 --> 00:12:47,726 From the Celtics? 164 00:12:49,853 --> 00:12:51,772 No, from Cirque De Soleil 165 00:12:54,149 --> 00:12:57,569 - Bill, I'm sure it was just a prank - Yeah, I'll give you a prank 166 00:12:57,819 --> 00:13:05,327 When they catch this clown, his face goes right up on my dart board, which means banned from Beacon Street Pizza. This boy will *never* get a slice of pie, anywhere! 167 00:13:06,370 --> 00:13:08,288 Bill, there's other pizza joints in Boston 168 00:13:08,664 --> 00:13:10,874 Oh, what, you don't think I talk to Little Caesar's? 169 00:13:12,084 --> 00:13:13,126 Or Domino's? 170 00:13:14,211 --> 00:13:15,254 Or The Hut? 171 00:13:16,213 --> 00:13:21,176 Hey, we're all connected -- www.atsatastypizza.com 172 00:13:23,262 --> 00:13:26,473 So, Bill What's the uh, big reward? 173 00:13:26,640 --> 00:13:28,141 Small pizza and a medium beverage! 174 00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:31,854 I'm sure they'll just make a new one 175 00:13:32,646 --> 00:13:37,276 Make a new one...you just don't make a new one! That's like Xeroxing the Mona Lisa! 176 00:13:37,776 --> 00:13:40,946 No, these people should be caught and strung up by their go-betweens! 177 00:13:43,991 --> 00:13:45,951 Maybe we should keep this to ourselves? 178 00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:53,083 All right, which one of you boneheads took my hair dryer?! 179 00:13:56,461 --> 00:14:01,675 Oh...my...God...BERG!!!!! 180 00:14:02,217 --> 00:14:04,720 What kind of *creep* would steal a Celtic banner? 181 00:14:05,262 --> 00:14:07,556 I don't know about you, but I can't go to work today... 182 00:14:14,771 --> 00:14:16,273 Can I talk to you guys for a sec?! 183 00:14:17,983 --> 00:14:19,026 She knows 184 00:14:20,402 --> 00:14:21,486 - She does? - Play dumb 185 00:14:21,695 --> 00:14:22,905 We are dumb 186 00:14:24,615 --> 00:14:26,033 Are you guys nuts?! 187 00:14:26,658 --> 00:14:27,618 I'm Nuts... 188 00:14:28,410 --> 00:14:29,870 This is my partner, Pretzels 189 00:14:32,873 --> 00:14:34,124 What seems to be the problem, ma'am? 190 00:14:34,208 --> 00:14:36,627 You know what's gonna happen when you get caught?! 191 00:14:37,669 --> 00:14:38,504 Caught for what? 192 00:14:38,795 --> 00:14:44,051 Oh, cut the crap! You are not dealing with normal people here! These people are sports fans 193 00:14:44,551 --> 00:14:46,345 These people barbecue in their cars! 194 00:14:48,096 --> 00:14:51,683 - Okay, well that's why we're not going to tell anyone! - You have to give it back! 195 00:14:51,934 --> 00:14:54,394 But Sharon, it's in poor taste to return a gift 196 00:14:54,603 --> 00:14:56,939 Thanks to you guys, I'm now an accomplice! 197 00:14:57,189 --> 00:14:59,650 - Why are you an accomplice?? - Because, I now know who stole it! 198 00:14:59,983 --> 00:15:02,486 - Who asked you to go to our apartment? - Who asked you to steal my hair dryer?! 199 00:15:02,736 --> 00:15:03,529 Who asked you to take it back! 200 00:15:03,695 --> 00:15:05,072 I WASHED MY HAIR! 201 00:15:05,322 --> 00:15:06,740 And that's *our* fault?! 202 00:15:09,535 --> 00:15:11,787 Don't *ever* do that again! 203 00:15:12,037 --> 00:15:12,996 I stole something once 204 00:15:13,705 --> 00:15:18,418 - Mr. Bauer, nobody stole anything - It was me and the Nazis, in a race against time 205 00:15:20,003 --> 00:15:23,966 The future of mankind depended on me retrieving the Ark of the Covenant 206 00:15:25,926 --> 00:15:27,427 Excuse us... 207 00:15:29,471 --> 00:15:31,139 Get back here! 208 00:15:34,977 --> 00:15:35,644 You were saying? 209 00:15:35,894 --> 00:15:39,940 A word of advice: Do not open that chest 210 00:15:40,315 --> 00:15:43,735 It has unspeakable powers that no man was meant to possess 211 00:15:48,532 --> 00:15:50,951 What do you think of the hat? 212 00:15:54,913 --> 00:15:56,665 Berg, why can't we just drop it and run? 213 00:15:57,583 --> 00:15:59,334 Because, then we won't get a reward 214 00:16:01,753 --> 00:16:04,339 Wait...I have a bad feeling about this 215 00:16:04,715 --> 00:16:07,217 You had a bad feeling about Shopping Cart Polo 216 00:16:09,219 --> 00:16:10,846 Yeah, and I broke my wrist! 217 00:16:11,180 --> 00:16:13,056 Yeah, and you met a nurse! 218 00:16:14,766 --> 00:16:15,642 We're gonna get caught 219 00:16:16,894 --> 00:16:21,398 - Trust me, okay? - Berg..I like my go betweens 220 00:16:24,818 --> 00:16:25,652 You're forgetting 221 00:16:26,445 --> 00:16:28,780 We're the guys who recovered the Ark of the Covenant! 222 00:16:35,579 --> 00:16:36,914 Okay, we're going to go to jail! 223 00:16:37,789 --> 00:16:41,960 No, no, no... I'll go to jail, you'll wind up with the lucky prison number and they'll send you on a cruise 224 00:16:45,797 --> 00:16:50,969 - Just relax - Berg, I don't think you realize how cute we look to larger men! 225 00:16:54,932 --> 00:16:57,434 And from the fans! Hell, you'd think I stole the damn thing! 226 00:16:59,394 --> 00:17:05,192 No, how 'bout *you* come up with a positive spin to put on this thing, and when you do I'll name a candy bar after you? 227 00:17:05,901 --> 00:17:10,030 I don't know, nuts, nougat...look, leave me alone! 228 00:17:10,656 --> 00:17:11,657 Whaddya want? 229 00:17:12,407 --> 00:17:16,662 - Remember me? You walked me down to the bench? - Oh, yeah -- the lucky ticket guy 230 00:17:16,995 --> 00:17:18,997 What's that, a four thousand calorie thank you note? 231 00:17:20,290 --> 00:17:22,793 Perfect, I'll die tonight and won't have to come in tomorrow 232 00:17:23,418 --> 00:17:25,087 You're gonna love this... 233 00:17:29,591 --> 00:17:33,303 Thank God!! Where'd you get it?! 234 00:17:33,679 --> 00:17:34,596 We found it! 235 00:17:35,305 --> 00:17:37,182 -You *found* it?! - Yes we did! 236 00:17:37,558 --> 00:17:40,310 Well, listen, it was really nice meeting you. Take care 237 00:17:40,561 --> 00:17:43,647 - And wait 'til you hear how we got it! - Oh, God... 238 00:17:45,065 --> 00:17:46,149 Go ahead, tell me... 239 00:17:46,525 --> 00:17:48,652 Berg, it's such a boring story... 240 00:17:49,361 --> 00:17:50,654 This man is too modest 241 00:17:54,992 --> 00:17:59,037 After the game, we ran into a group of Bulls fans in a bar 242 00:17:59,454 --> 00:18:02,749 And they were bragging about how they stole the banner 243 00:18:03,709 --> 00:18:07,754 So we followed them out to a car and there they were, tying it around a big rock 244 00:18:08,088 --> 00:18:09,631 And they were taunting it 245 00:18:12,968 --> 00:18:14,511 Sure ! 246 00:18:16,180 --> 00:18:21,351 So we tailed them over to the BU bridge, where they stopped, and hurled it into the Charles River 247 00:18:21,518 --> 00:18:23,270 SPLASH! 248 00:18:27,357 --> 00:18:35,699 Pete here...overcoming his childhood fear of water, dove into the river, and saved the banner 249 00:18:37,743 --> 00:18:38,243 Soo... 250 00:18:40,037 --> 00:18:41,288 What do we get? 251 00:18:43,707 --> 00:18:46,001 What a great story! 252 00:18:46,835 --> 00:18:48,670 Now, uh, let me get this straight 253 00:18:49,880 --> 00:18:52,132 You stole the banner, got scared, and brought it back 254 00:18:56,386 --> 00:18:57,596 Yes, sir 255 00:18:59,473 --> 00:18:59,973 Security! 256 00:19:00,224 --> 00:19:02,601 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, okay? 257 00:19:03,977 --> 00:19:05,062 We didn't steal it 258 00:19:07,189 --> 00:19:09,358 I...stole it 259 00:19:10,108 --> 00:19:10,734 For him 260 00:19:12,402 --> 00:19:16,865 You see this guy here? This *is* a Celtics fan 261 00:19:17,574 --> 00:19:22,746 This guy sits in the seventy-fifth row he can barely make out the players, much less the court but he is there 262 00:19:23,789 --> 00:19:25,666 Two hours early, for warm-ups 263 00:19:26,583 --> 00:19:28,961 Well, you know they play the way they practice... 264 00:19:31,588 --> 00:19:38,220 And he turned a guy who couldn't care less about the Celtics into a real fan 265 00:19:39,096 --> 00:19:40,013 Really? 266 00:19:40,347 --> 00:19:43,267 Oh, Pete, when you see a game from the bench like that... 267 00:19:44,810 --> 00:19:45,686 Where the hell's security? 268 00:19:45,853 --> 00:19:50,774 - Okay, look! Look, I don't want to tell you your job, but you're a PR guy, right? - Yeah.. 269 00:19:52,401 --> 00:19:57,656 And you can either vilify the most dedicated fan in history, 270 00:19:58,282 --> 00:20:01,493 or you can turn him into a hero 271 00:20:02,995 --> 00:20:09,126 After all, I mean, isn't that what Celtic tradition's all about, making heroes? 272 00:20:11,253 --> 00:20:14,298 That...is the biggest crock I've ever heard 273 00:20:16,300 --> 00:20:18,468 But I think I can sell it and save all our asses! 274 00:20:25,767 --> 00:20:27,644 How come you can never find the organ player? 275 00:20:29,271 --> 00:20:34,234 This is -- this is unbelievable! Look, the parquet floor! 276 00:20:34,401 --> 00:20:35,194 Butter 277 00:20:37,196 --> 00:20:41,992 - Hey, Pete. I thought you said the best seats are up there? - Up there are the best seats... 278 00:20:42,784 --> 00:20:46,663 If you're up there. But, down here this is heaven 279 00:20:47,122 --> 00:20:50,375 Only you can commit larceny and wind up with floor seats 280 00:20:52,294 --> 00:20:53,795 Look, we're up by twelve 281 00:20:54,296 --> 00:20:55,672 We? 282 00:20:56,298 --> 00:21:09,937 Ladies and Gentlemen, your attention please. The Boston Celtics would like to give a warm welcome to the young man who recovered the 1981 Celtic championship banner, Mr. Pete Dunville! 283 00:21:25,369 --> 00:21:27,287 Hello? Oh hey Lar 284 00:21:27,788 --> 00:21:28,914 - Who's that? - Larry Bird 285 00:21:29,581 --> 00:21:32,334 Larry, Larry, Larry. Larry let it go 286 00:21:32,881 --> 00:21:35,534 OK.. So Camp Pomahack had a lake But we had tetherball 287 00:21:35,794 --> 00:21:37,506 - We had archery, Larry - Berg, give me the phone! 288 00:21:37,631 --> 00:21:38,715 Give me the phone!! 289 00:21:39,132 --> 00:21:40,050 Well, so what? 290 00:21:40,050 --> 00:21:41,677 - Berg! - Field hockey is for sissies! 291 00:21:42,302 --> 00:21:43,929 Berg, give me the phone! I want to talk to him! 24850

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