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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,088 --> 00:00:03,960 [funky music] 2 00:00:04,047 --> 00:00:11,011 ♪ ♪ 3 00:00:24,589 --> 00:00:28,158 [tires squealing] 4 00:00:28,245 --> 00:00:30,856 Get your skanky ass away from me. 5 00:00:30,943 --> 00:00:32,641 Hit the bricks. 6 00:00:35,774 --> 00:00:37,950 Easy! 7 00:00:38,038 --> 00:00:40,257 [siren wailing in distance] 8 00:00:43,434 --> 00:00:44,957 Dumb bitch. 9 00:00:46,611 --> 00:00:48,135 [whooshes] 10 00:00:48,222 --> 00:00:50,180 ♪ ♪ 11 00:00:50,267 --> 00:00:51,921 How you doin'? 12 00:00:52,008 --> 00:00:53,618 Nice night. 13 00:00:53,705 --> 00:00:54,793 Cool breeze. 14 00:00:54,880 --> 00:00:56,752 [laughs] 15 00:00:56,839 --> 00:00:59,363 Man, you know you didn't have to treat her like that. 16 00:00:59,450 --> 00:01:03,106 I mean, sure, yeah, sometimes love can be cruel, 17 00:01:03,193 --> 00:01:05,891 but it's an unnecessary byproduct. 18 00:01:05,978 --> 00:01:07,589 It's not the point of the damn thing. 19 00:01:07,676 --> 00:01:09,591 I'm gonna count to ten. 20 00:01:09,678 --> 00:01:12,855 Then I'm gonna bounce you off the damn asphalt. 21 00:01:12,942 --> 00:01:16,206 One, two, three-- 22 00:01:16,293 --> 00:01:18,078 You a meat eater? 23 00:01:18,165 --> 00:01:19,862 I'm keeping a close eye on my cholesterol. 24 00:01:19,949 --> 00:01:22,169 I heard carnivores had a higher load in their blood. 25 00:01:22,256 --> 00:01:24,171 What the hell does my blood gotta do with anything? 26 00:01:24,258 --> 00:01:26,564 I'm just trying to watch what I eat. 27 00:01:26,651 --> 00:01:29,001 What? 28 00:01:29,089 --> 00:01:31,830 [screams] [engine revving] 29 00:01:31,917 --> 00:01:33,615 [slurping] 30 00:01:33,702 --> 00:01:36,618 [mysterious music] 31 00:01:36,705 --> 00:01:38,446 ♪ ♪ 32 00:01:38,533 --> 00:01:39,621 [cheers and applause] 33 00:01:39,708 --> 00:01:41,884 Thank you, everyone! 34 00:01:41,971 --> 00:01:45,583 Thank you, everyone, thank you very much. 35 00:01:45,670 --> 00:01:49,587 Hello, Akron, Ohio! 36 00:01:49,674 --> 00:01:51,154 I can't hear you! 37 00:01:51,241 --> 00:01:52,982 [cheers and applause] 38 00:01:53,069 --> 00:01:54,940 There we go. 39 00:01:55,027 --> 00:01:58,770 Today is not only the first day of the rest of your lives, 40 00:01:58,857 --> 00:02:02,426 but it is the best day, because today, 41 00:02:02,513 --> 00:02:05,777 we are going to learn how to get what you want 42 00:02:05,864 --> 00:02:07,562 out of the life that you are living. 43 00:02:07,649 --> 00:02:10,652 [applause] But you can't get what you want 44 00:02:10,739 --> 00:02:12,436 if you don't know what it is, can you? 45 00:02:12,523 --> 00:02:14,003 crowd: No, you can't! 46 00:02:14,090 --> 00:02:15,396 Tell me what I want. 47 00:02:15,483 --> 00:02:17,398 You want Sarah to love you back! 48 00:02:17,485 --> 00:02:19,530 Yes, exactly. [cheering] 49 00:02:19,617 --> 00:02:21,532 But it is not easy. 50 00:02:21,619 --> 00:02:22,968 It's a journey. 51 00:02:23,055 --> 00:02:25,188 And before I reach my destination, 52 00:02:25,275 --> 00:02:27,408 there's a secret that I have to learn. 53 00:02:27,495 --> 00:02:29,584 crowd: What's the secret, Reginald? 54 00:02:29,671 --> 00:02:31,455 Tell us! 55 00:02:31,542 --> 00:02:33,849 If you always do what you've always done, 56 00:02:33,936 --> 00:02:35,807 you'll always get what you've always got. 57 00:02:35,894 --> 00:02:37,722 [cheers and applause] If you always do 58 00:02:37,809 --> 00:02:39,202 what you've always done, 59 00:02:39,289 --> 00:02:41,639 you'll always get what you've always got. 60 00:02:41,726 --> 00:02:45,208 If you always do what you've always done, 61 00:02:45,295 --> 00:02:48,037 you'll always get what you've always got. 62 00:02:48,124 --> 00:02:50,170 [quirky music] 63 00:02:50,257 --> 00:02:51,345 [sighs] 64 00:02:51,432 --> 00:02:58,395 ♪ ♪ 65 00:03:05,750 --> 00:03:07,709 Hey, Regi-world. 66 00:03:07,796 --> 00:03:10,364 Regi-round. 67 00:03:10,451 --> 00:03:13,367 ♪ ♪ 68 00:03:13,454 --> 00:03:15,586 Regi-wide, comin' through. 69 00:03:17,197 --> 00:03:18,720 You know eventually fat-shaming 70 00:03:18,807 --> 00:03:20,243 will lose its punch, right? 71 00:03:22,114 --> 00:03:23,986 I'm so fat, I have my own zip code. 72 00:03:24,073 --> 00:03:26,336 I'm so fat that my favorite necklace is the food chain. 73 00:03:26,423 --> 00:03:28,295 I'm so fat that when I step on the scale, 74 00:03:28,382 --> 00:03:29,774 it says "To be continued." 75 00:03:29,861 --> 00:03:32,560 I'm so fat that when I go to the beach, 76 00:03:32,647 --> 00:03:35,519 Greenpeace shows up to shove me in the ocean. 77 00:03:38,305 --> 00:03:40,045 I'm so fat-- - Yeah, I got it. 78 00:03:40,132 --> 00:03:41,656 Super funny. 79 00:03:41,743 --> 00:03:44,049 I'm about to die laughing from how funny you are 80 00:03:44,136 --> 00:03:45,529 about being obese. [door opens, shuts] 81 00:03:45,616 --> 00:03:47,139 I'm so fat, that when I-- 82 00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:48,880 [soft dreamy music] 83 00:03:48,967 --> 00:03:51,753 Hi, Sarah. - Hey, Reginald. [giggles] 84 00:03:51,840 --> 00:03:58,716 ♪ ♪ 85 00:04:02,503 --> 00:04:04,331 [snickers] 86 00:04:04,418 --> 00:04:06,768 Never. No chance. 87 00:04:06,855 --> 00:04:08,596 "Um, no, thank you, Reginald. 88 00:04:08,683 --> 00:04:10,250 I don't like you like that." 89 00:04:11,947 --> 00:04:13,992 Forever. 90 00:04:14,079 --> 00:04:17,126 [light music playing] 91 00:04:17,213 --> 00:04:18,606 Welcome to Slushy Shack. How can I help you? 92 00:04:18,693 --> 00:04:21,130 ♪ ♪ 93 00:04:21,217 --> 00:04:23,350 Welcome to Slushy Shack. How may I help you? 94 00:04:23,437 --> 00:04:24,829 You don't have to say that every time, you know. 95 00:04:24,916 --> 00:04:26,135 [register whirs, dings] 96 00:04:26,222 --> 00:04:27,745 Crazy thing. 97 00:04:29,138 --> 00:04:31,401 Actually, I--I do. It's in the manual. 98 00:04:31,488 --> 00:04:33,534 There is no manual, and we both know it. 99 00:04:33,621 --> 00:04:35,449 I'll get a Chocoholic Blast, 100 00:04:35,536 --> 00:04:37,668 but I want you to add just a pinch of Tropical Coconut 101 00:04:37,755 --> 00:04:39,191 in there with it, but not too much 102 00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:40,715 or I get a weird aftertaste in my mouth. 103 00:04:40,802 --> 00:04:42,543 - An exact pinch. - It's just an expression. 104 00:04:42,630 --> 00:04:45,067 But imagine taking a pinch of slushy with your fingers 105 00:04:45,154 --> 00:04:47,156 and adding it into my slushy, but use a spoon 106 00:04:47,243 --> 00:04:48,636 to add the same amount instead. 107 00:04:48,723 --> 00:04:50,420 Got it. Right away, Claire. 108 00:04:50,507 --> 00:04:54,468 ♪ ♪ 109 00:04:54,555 --> 00:04:55,860 [register dings] - See you tomorrow night, 110 00:04:55,947 --> 00:04:58,036 like always. 111 00:04:58,123 --> 00:05:01,692 ♪ ♪ 112 00:05:01,779 --> 00:05:03,651 "What's the Story, Morning Glory?" 113 00:05:03,738 --> 00:05:05,870 Oasis, nice. 114 00:05:08,569 --> 00:05:11,528 - "What's the Story"-- - "Work Bitch." Britney. 115 00:05:11,615 --> 00:05:14,270 "I'm So Bored in the USA." The Clash. 116 00:05:14,357 --> 00:05:15,619 "We're Gonna Have to Get Out of This Place." 117 00:05:15,706 --> 00:05:17,142 Ooh, in my "Little Red Corvette"? 118 00:05:17,229 --> 00:05:18,753 "Shut Up and Drive." 119 00:05:18,840 --> 00:05:20,450 Ooh, "Bad Together." 120 00:05:20,537 --> 00:05:21,799 "Drunk in Love." 121 00:05:22,974 --> 00:05:24,715 [laughs] Because Queen Bey is-- 122 00:05:24,802 --> 00:05:26,848 - Awesome. - Yeah. [laughs] 123 00:05:26,935 --> 00:05:28,502 Sorry to interrupt. 124 00:05:28,589 --> 00:05:29,720 Can I get a Sour Apple Scream? 125 00:05:29,807 --> 00:05:30,895 Sorry, we were just-- 126 00:05:30,982 --> 00:05:33,463 Talking in song titles. 127 00:05:33,550 --> 00:05:35,030 "I Like That." 128 00:05:35,117 --> 00:05:36,640 Janelle Monáe, yeah. - Janelle Monáe. Nice. 129 00:05:36,727 --> 00:05:39,904 - [laughs] - All right, I'm on break. 130 00:05:39,991 --> 00:05:42,037 Uh, we're all out of Sour Apple Scream, actually. 131 00:05:42,124 --> 00:05:44,256 It's quite popular. 132 00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:45,736 Pineapple Surprise? 133 00:05:45,823 --> 00:05:47,303 Oh, it's my favorite. 134 00:05:47,390 --> 00:05:50,828 Have we met before? 135 00:05:50,915 --> 00:05:52,569 Nah. 136 00:05:52,656 --> 00:05:55,224 No, it's, uh-- it's my first time. 137 00:05:56,791 --> 00:05:57,835 Welcome to the Slushy Shack. 138 00:05:57,922 --> 00:05:59,054 How may I help you? 139 00:05:59,141 --> 00:06:01,056 Give me a minute. 140 00:06:01,143 --> 00:06:03,232 I'll think of something. 141 00:06:03,319 --> 00:06:05,495 [slurping] 142 00:06:05,582 --> 00:06:07,279 Mmm. 143 00:06:07,367 --> 00:06:10,413 Yeah, so the executive training program is, uh, designed 144 00:06:10,500 --> 00:06:14,069 to give candidates like me hands-on experience 145 00:06:14,156 --> 00:06:17,246 with day-to-day franchise operations. 146 00:06:17,333 --> 00:06:19,379 - Right. - [chuckles] 147 00:06:19,466 --> 00:06:21,468 Hey, Reginald. 148 00:06:21,555 --> 00:06:23,383 Third snack already? - Oh. 149 00:06:23,470 --> 00:06:26,386 Give it a rest, Todd. 150 00:06:31,956 --> 00:06:34,785 [melancholy music] 151 00:06:34,872 --> 00:06:37,484 [sighs] 152 00:06:37,571 --> 00:06:44,491 ♪ ♪ 153 00:06:47,581 --> 00:06:49,670 Dear God, 154 00:06:49,757 --> 00:06:52,673 and/or grown-up baby Jesus... 155 00:06:52,760 --> 00:06:54,718 [sighs] 156 00:06:54,805 --> 00:06:57,460 whatever down payment was made before I was born, 157 00:06:57,547 --> 00:07:00,376 whatever was promised, 158 00:07:00,463 --> 00:07:02,378 I want a refund. 159 00:07:02,465 --> 00:07:05,860 Every cent, or I will report you 160 00:07:05,947 --> 00:07:07,427 to the Better Business Bureau 161 00:07:07,514 --> 00:07:09,516 or the Pope 162 00:07:09,603 --> 00:07:11,213 and possibly the Mormons, 163 00:07:11,300 --> 00:07:14,434 if they turn out to be relevant. 164 00:07:14,521 --> 00:07:15,870 [sighs] 165 00:07:17,611 --> 00:07:22,224 I was promised so much that I did not receive. 166 00:07:22,311 --> 00:07:24,269 The marketing was deceptive. 167 00:07:24,356 --> 00:07:30,667 And, sure, I may not exactly know how it all works-- 168 00:07:30,754 --> 00:07:34,584 like, what life is handed out to who and why, 169 00:07:34,671 --> 00:07:37,413 but I'm beginning to think a mistake was made 170 00:07:37,500 --> 00:07:40,372 pretty obviously not in my favor. 171 00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:44,333 And as a result, I'm not satisfied. 172 00:07:44,420 --> 00:07:46,944 And you know what? 173 00:07:47,031 --> 00:07:49,381 in addition to a refund, 174 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:52,689 I'd like a personal apology. 175 00:07:52,776 --> 00:07:55,562 I would also like bugless summers 176 00:07:55,649 --> 00:07:58,739 and less active sweat glands 177 00:07:58,826 --> 00:08:03,134 and someone to talk to outside of the Slushy Shack. 178 00:08:03,221 --> 00:08:07,312 And, like, maybe, 179 00:08:07,399 --> 00:08:11,839 just one time, once... 180 00:08:11,926 --> 00:08:13,493 a lucky break. 181 00:08:13,580 --> 00:08:18,149 ♪ ♪ 182 00:08:18,236 --> 00:08:20,935 Whoa! 183 00:08:21,022 --> 00:08:22,371 You scared me half to death. 184 00:08:22,458 --> 00:08:23,938 Where did you even come from? 185 00:08:24,025 --> 00:08:25,461 I didn't even hear you coming. 186 00:08:25,548 --> 00:08:27,985 What's your name? 187 00:08:28,072 --> 00:08:30,684 Reginald Andres. 188 00:08:30,771 --> 00:08:33,817 Call me Maurice. 189 00:08:33,904 --> 00:08:35,950 Hi, Maurice. 190 00:08:37,647 --> 00:08:39,475 You know, I read once that self-directed talk 191 00:08:39,562 --> 00:08:41,042 is a healthy instinct. 192 00:08:41,129 --> 00:08:42,826 It assists in stimulating, 193 00:08:42,913 --> 00:08:46,221 directing, and evaluating actions. 194 00:08:46,308 --> 00:08:50,181 I--I was asking for things that I don't have. 195 00:08:50,268 --> 00:08:52,749 Yeah, like a prayer. 196 00:08:52,836 --> 00:08:54,446 I'm an atheist, actually. 197 00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:56,318 I'm not. 198 00:08:56,405 --> 00:09:00,540 How much did you hear? 199 00:09:00,627 --> 00:09:03,934 I believe everyone deserves a refund, 200 00:09:04,021 --> 00:09:05,936 someone to talk to, 201 00:09:06,023 --> 00:09:08,156 bugless summers, too. 202 00:09:09,897 --> 00:09:12,900 Closing time. Grab a mop! 203 00:09:16,730 --> 00:09:19,515 You really like her, don't you? 204 00:09:19,602 --> 00:09:21,125 Her name is Sarah. 205 00:09:21,212 --> 00:09:23,171 Maybe you should do something about that. 206 00:09:23,258 --> 00:09:24,433 Ask her out. 207 00:09:24,520 --> 00:09:26,000 Take her to dinner and a movie. 208 00:09:26,087 --> 00:09:28,089 Funny. You know, you'd like Todd. 209 00:09:28,176 --> 00:09:29,264 He has the same kind of jokes. 210 00:09:29,351 --> 00:09:32,223 You're afraid. 211 00:09:32,310 --> 00:09:35,270 Unlike most men, I know my limitations. 212 00:09:35,357 --> 00:09:37,577 Truth, Reggie? 213 00:09:37,664 --> 00:09:40,057 Everybody gets to write their own story. 214 00:09:40,144 --> 00:09:41,798 Okay, I like a good fortune cookie 215 00:09:41,885 --> 00:09:43,017 as much as the next guy, but-- 216 00:09:43,104 --> 00:09:44,975 [voice echoes] Listen to me. 217 00:09:45,062 --> 00:09:46,629 Go back in there. 218 00:09:46,716 --> 00:09:48,326 Do not be afraid. 219 00:09:48,413 --> 00:09:50,851 Ask Sarah if she has plans Friday night, 220 00:09:50,938 --> 00:09:52,809 because if she doesn't, 221 00:09:52,896 --> 00:09:54,811 you think it'd be fun if the two of you went out. 222 00:09:54,898 --> 00:09:57,640 Maybe to dinner and a movie. 223 00:09:57,727 --> 00:10:00,600 If she says no, that's okay. 224 00:10:00,687 --> 00:10:03,211 Just say, "Cool. Maybe next time." 225 00:10:03,298 --> 00:10:05,605 But if she says yes, 226 00:10:05,692 --> 00:10:08,303 you smile like you mean it, 227 00:10:08,390 --> 00:10:10,131 totally comfortable with your good luck, 228 00:10:10,218 --> 00:10:14,004 and you say, "Great. Friday. You and me." 229 00:10:14,091 --> 00:10:16,441 "You and me" is a promise, not a description. 230 00:10:16,528 --> 00:10:19,488 You need to communicate that to her. 231 00:10:19,575 --> 00:10:23,361 And then you walk away, 232 00:10:23,448 --> 00:10:26,364 like you just did the one thing you were always meant to do. 233 00:10:26,451 --> 00:10:29,280 [eerie synth music] 234 00:10:29,367 --> 00:10:36,331 ♪ ♪ 235 00:10:37,724 --> 00:10:40,509 [sighs] 236 00:10:40,596 --> 00:10:42,990 Good luck, kid. 237 00:10:47,734 --> 00:10:49,997 About time. 238 00:10:50,084 --> 00:10:51,738 - Hey, Sarah. - Hey. 239 00:10:51,825 --> 00:10:53,043 Are you busy Friday night? 240 00:10:53,130 --> 00:10:54,479 Uh, Friday? 241 00:10:54,566 --> 00:10:56,612 No. No, I'm not busy. 242 00:10:56,699 --> 00:10:57,831 I think it would be fun if we went out. 243 00:10:57,918 --> 00:11:00,877 Maybe dinner and a movie. 244 00:11:00,964 --> 00:11:03,837 Sure. I--I would like that. 245 00:11:03,924 --> 00:11:06,578 Great. Friday. 246 00:11:06,666 --> 00:11:09,494 You and me. 247 00:11:15,849 --> 00:11:17,546 You busy Saturday night? 248 00:11:17,633 --> 00:11:19,069 'Cause I think it'd be even more fun if-- 249 00:11:19,156 --> 00:11:21,245 Not a chance, Todd. 250 00:11:21,332 --> 00:11:25,162 Cool. Completely understand. 251 00:11:25,249 --> 00:11:28,035 [dreamy music] 252 00:11:28,122 --> 00:11:35,085 ♪ ♪ 253 00:11:48,272 --> 00:11:50,405 [laughs] 254 00:11:52,581 --> 00:11:55,236 [upbeat synth music] 255 00:11:55,323 --> 00:11:56,672 Yes! 256 00:11:56,759 --> 00:11:57,891 Ah! 257 00:11:57,978 --> 00:12:04,506 ♪ ♪ 258 00:12:04,593 --> 00:12:05,725 Ooh! 259 00:12:08,510 --> 00:12:11,121 If you always do what you've always done, 260 00:12:11,208 --> 00:12:12,644 you'll always get what you've always got. 261 00:12:12,732 --> 00:12:15,082 If you always do what you've always done, 262 00:12:15,169 --> 00:12:17,388 you'll always get what you've always got. 263 00:12:17,475 --> 00:12:19,347 [percussive music] 264 00:12:19,434 --> 00:12:20,827 If you always do what you've always done, 265 00:12:20,914 --> 00:12:22,872 you'll always get what you've always got. 266 00:12:22,959 --> 00:12:24,526 I was hoping you'd show up again. 267 00:12:24,613 --> 00:12:26,397 Hey, Reggie. What's up? 268 00:12:26,484 --> 00:12:29,096 We need to have a very serious talk right now. 269 00:12:29,183 --> 00:12:30,706 How's that? 270 00:12:30,793 --> 00:12:32,708 I have a date with Sarah Kinney tomorrow. 271 00:12:32,795 --> 00:12:34,144 [chuckles] 272 00:12:34,231 --> 00:12:35,842 Well, that's a positive development. 273 00:12:35,929 --> 00:12:37,974 You asked her out, and she said yes. 274 00:12:38,061 --> 00:12:39,846 That's the thing I don't understand. 275 00:12:39,933 --> 00:12:41,282 That she said yes? 276 00:12:41,369 --> 00:12:43,719 It's like I was there, 277 00:12:43,806 --> 00:12:46,243 and not there at the same time. 278 00:12:46,330 --> 00:12:48,942 Like, there was a physical barrier 279 00:12:49,029 --> 00:12:50,421 between my perception of the moment 280 00:12:50,508 --> 00:12:52,206 and the moment itself. 281 00:12:52,293 --> 00:12:54,599 Like I was Reginald and not Reginald 282 00:12:54,686 --> 00:12:55,775 at the same time. 283 00:12:55,862 --> 00:12:57,385 Okay, okay. Yeah. 284 00:12:57,472 --> 00:12:58,821 You might be overthinking things. 285 00:12:58,908 --> 00:13:00,736 It's just dinner and a movie. 286 00:13:00,823 --> 00:13:02,042 Which, under normal circumstances, 287 00:13:02,129 --> 00:13:03,826 is no big deal, right? 288 00:13:03,913 --> 00:13:06,089 But seeing as how I've never been on a date, 289 00:13:06,176 --> 00:13:07,221 it's a very big deal! 290 00:13:07,308 --> 00:13:08,439 Hang on. 291 00:13:08,526 --> 00:13:09,789 Not even once? 292 00:13:09,876 --> 00:13:12,226 [sighs] 293 00:13:13,531 --> 00:13:15,011 [exhales] 294 00:13:15,098 --> 00:13:16,708 Okay, okay. 295 00:13:16,796 --> 00:13:20,060 Uh, where does Sarah live? 296 00:13:20,147 --> 00:13:22,627 Uh, Magnolia and 40th? 297 00:13:22,714 --> 00:13:26,153 All right, um, meet me at Saint Franks 298 00:13:26,240 --> 00:13:27,807 an hour before your date. 299 00:13:27,894 --> 00:13:29,721 Do you think an hour's long enough to prepare me? 300 00:13:29,809 --> 00:13:31,419 I--I mean, I'm a quick study, sure, 301 00:13:31,506 --> 00:13:33,290 but, I mean, we're talking about an arena 302 00:13:33,377 --> 00:13:34,726 in which I have zero experience. 303 00:13:34,814 --> 00:13:36,511 Hey, do you trust me? 304 00:13:36,598 --> 00:13:39,253 Completely, but I have no idea why. 305 00:13:39,340 --> 00:13:40,994 I'll tell you what to do, 306 00:13:41,081 --> 00:13:43,953 every step, and then you'll do it. 307 00:13:45,650 --> 00:13:47,783 I'ma get a slushy now. 308 00:13:47,870 --> 00:13:49,089 Cool. 309 00:13:49,176 --> 00:13:51,308 Cool, cool, cool. Yeah. 310 00:13:51,395 --> 00:13:54,268 [mysterious music] 311 00:13:54,355 --> 00:14:01,014 ♪ ♪ 312 00:14:02,885 --> 00:14:05,627 You're a good-looking guy. I mean, tell me, 313 00:14:05,714 --> 00:14:08,848 how have you never been on a date before? 314 00:14:08,935 --> 00:14:10,501 Are you serious right now? 315 00:14:10,588 --> 00:14:12,416 All right, I get it. You're a big guy, but-- 316 00:14:12,503 --> 00:14:13,765 Size matters. 317 00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:15,245 [laughs] That's pretty funny. 318 00:14:15,332 --> 00:14:16,725 It does. I mean, I've never really had 319 00:14:16,812 --> 00:14:17,944 the chance to work on my dating skills 320 00:14:18,031 --> 00:14:20,076 'cause I never really had dates. 321 00:14:20,163 --> 00:14:24,211 And loneliness was sort of my natural habitat. 322 00:14:24,298 --> 00:14:27,475 And girls aren't exactly... 323 00:14:27,562 --> 00:14:28,955 attracted to guys like me. 324 00:14:29,042 --> 00:14:30,521 Maybe they don't know the real you. 325 00:14:30,608 --> 00:14:31,566 [laughs] It feels like they have 326 00:14:31,653 --> 00:14:32,741 a pretty good idea. 327 00:14:32,828 --> 00:14:35,700 [soft music playing] 328 00:14:35,787 --> 00:14:39,008 Hey, 47 minutes till your first date. 329 00:14:39,095 --> 00:14:40,967 Yeah, I'm gonna need about ten more of these. 330 00:14:42,664 --> 00:14:44,535 [echoing] Listen. 331 00:14:44,622 --> 00:14:47,451 [synth-pop music] 332 00:14:47,538 --> 00:14:51,978 ♪ ♪ 333 00:14:52,065 --> 00:14:53,066 Shit. 334 00:14:53,153 --> 00:14:54,589 As you wish. 335 00:14:54,676 --> 00:14:56,852 No, no, no. Not you, Reggie. 336 00:15:00,073 --> 00:15:03,076 - Are they friends of yours? - Not even a little bit. 337 00:15:03,163 --> 00:15:04,947 Look, I need to handle this real quick. 338 00:15:05,034 --> 00:15:06,296 It shouldn't take long. 339 00:15:06,383 --> 00:15:07,602 46 minutes till my first date. 340 00:15:07,689 --> 00:15:09,952 [laughs nervously] 341 00:15:10,039 --> 00:15:12,085 On the clock. Got it. 342 00:15:15,827 --> 00:15:16,872 They seem nice. 343 00:15:16,959 --> 00:15:17,917 [whooshes] 344 00:15:19,440 --> 00:15:21,268 What's your name? 345 00:15:21,355 --> 00:15:23,357 Re--Reginald Andres. 346 00:15:23,444 --> 00:15:25,663 Nice to meet you, Reginald. 347 00:15:25,750 --> 00:15:26,838 I'm Moira. 348 00:15:26,926 --> 00:15:29,493 Moira, stop that shit, now. 349 00:15:31,191 --> 00:15:32,366 Is he yours? 350 00:15:32,453 --> 00:15:34,585 Reggie, meet Moira, Penelope, 351 00:15:34,672 --> 00:15:36,109 LeBron, and Isaac. 352 00:15:36,196 --> 00:15:37,719 They need a couple minutes of my time. 353 00:15:37,806 --> 00:15:40,026 Oh, more than a couple, I think. 354 00:15:40,113 --> 00:15:42,985 Maurice has been bad. 355 00:15:43,072 --> 00:15:45,945 LeBron and Isaac need to chat with me out back. 356 00:15:46,032 --> 00:15:47,337 How's that sound with you, Reggie? 357 00:15:47,424 --> 00:15:49,296 I--I'll be right here. [chuckles] 358 00:15:49,383 --> 00:15:51,602 Moira and Penelope will remain here. 359 00:15:51,689 --> 00:15:54,040 Oh, that's--that's not a problem for me. 360 00:15:54,127 --> 00:15:56,433 Reggie, it's best if you come with us. 361 00:15:56,520 --> 00:15:57,521 Okay. 362 00:15:57,608 --> 00:16:00,307 [eerie music] 363 00:16:00,394 --> 00:16:07,314 ♪ ♪ 364 00:16:16,062 --> 00:16:18,455 I'll miss you. 365 00:16:19,935 --> 00:16:21,806 Reggie, let's go. 366 00:16:21,893 --> 00:16:25,810 ♪ ♪ 367 00:16:31,512 --> 00:16:34,863 Maurice Miller, for your defiance, 368 00:16:34,950 --> 00:16:38,432 for your impertinence, look. 369 00:16:38,519 --> 00:16:39,955 - [scoffs] - Look. 370 00:16:40,042 --> 00:16:40,825 Get that shit outta here. [whooshing] 371 00:16:40,912 --> 00:16:43,567 Reggie. Reginald. 372 00:16:43,654 --> 00:16:47,441 Reggie. Reginald. Reginaldo. 373 00:16:47,528 --> 00:16:50,183 Bonsoir, ma petit bouchée. 374 00:16:50,270 --> 00:16:52,837 You smell amazing. 375 00:16:52,924 --> 00:16:54,535 Do you wanna be ours? 376 00:16:54,622 --> 00:16:57,016 We're happy to share. 377 00:16:57,103 --> 00:16:59,496 When you say share, what do you mean? 378 00:16:59,583 --> 00:17:00,845 [hisses] 379 00:17:00,932 --> 00:17:02,412 [both slurping] - [screaming] 380 00:17:02,499 --> 00:17:03,500 [dramatic music] 381 00:17:03,587 --> 00:17:05,024 Leave him alone! 382 00:17:05,111 --> 00:17:06,199 [hisses] 383 00:17:06,286 --> 00:17:11,030 ♪ ♪ 384 00:17:11,117 --> 00:17:12,683 [whimpering] 385 00:17:12,770 --> 00:17:15,164 [struggling efforts] 386 00:17:15,251 --> 00:17:16,339 Damn it, Reggie. 387 00:17:16,426 --> 00:17:18,472 [whooshing] 388 00:17:18,559 --> 00:17:19,995 Go away! 389 00:17:20,082 --> 00:17:21,736 Maybe just a taste before we depart. 390 00:17:21,823 --> 00:17:22,998 [whooshing] 391 00:17:23,085 --> 00:17:24,391 [grunts] [crashing] 392 00:17:24,478 --> 00:17:27,611 ♪ ♪ 393 00:17:27,698 --> 00:17:28,830 [stabs] 394 00:17:28,917 --> 00:17:31,615 [screaming] 395 00:17:31,702 --> 00:17:33,052 [intense music] 396 00:17:33,139 --> 00:17:34,879 [whooshing] 397 00:17:34,966 --> 00:17:37,186 ♪ ♪ 398 00:17:37,273 --> 00:17:40,929 [gurgling] How--how did you... 399 00:17:41,016 --> 00:17:42,322 Pick's wooden. 400 00:17:42,409 --> 00:17:43,932 Do you think you can tell Sarah 401 00:17:44,019 --> 00:17:45,716 I'm gonna be late for the date? 402 00:17:45,803 --> 00:17:47,501 You can use my cell. 403 00:17:47,588 --> 00:17:49,285 No, I can fix this, Reggie. 404 00:17:49,372 --> 00:17:51,679 Okay, but I--I can't do it without your say-so. 405 00:17:51,766 --> 00:17:53,724 The decision has to be yours. 406 00:17:53,811 --> 00:17:55,030 Decide? 407 00:17:55,117 --> 00:17:56,510 That's right. 408 00:17:56,597 --> 00:17:59,426 Decide to die now, a few moments early. 409 00:17:59,513 --> 00:18:01,123 [sirens wailing in distance] 410 00:18:01,210 --> 00:18:02,864 Why would I do that? 411 00:18:02,951 --> 00:18:05,171 So I can save you. 412 00:18:06,737 --> 00:18:08,087 - Okay. - Okay. 413 00:18:08,174 --> 00:18:11,438 Okay. Okay. 414 00:18:11,525 --> 00:18:14,571 ♪ ♪ 415 00:18:14,658 --> 00:18:16,617 [groaning] 416 00:18:16,704 --> 00:18:23,406 ♪ ♪ 417 00:18:23,493 --> 00:18:25,626 [swallowing] 418 00:18:25,713 --> 00:18:32,589 ♪ ♪ 419 00:18:40,162 --> 00:18:43,122 [whooshing] - [gasps] 420 00:18:43,209 --> 00:18:45,994 [panting] 421 00:18:48,605 --> 00:18:50,738 I had the weirdest dream last night. 422 00:18:50,825 --> 00:18:52,305 - No, you're not dreaming. - Right. 423 00:18:52,392 --> 00:18:54,307 [laughs] Right, right. 424 00:18:54,394 --> 00:18:56,613 I get it. I know what's happening here. 425 00:18:56,700 --> 00:18:58,267 I'm still dreaming. 426 00:18:58,354 --> 00:19:00,226 Like, this is the first dream I woke up from, 427 00:19:00,313 --> 00:19:02,315 and now I'm in the second one, like it's a sequel, right? 428 00:19:02,402 --> 00:19:04,360 [laughs] Nah, it's not a sequel. 429 00:19:04,447 --> 00:19:05,492 Of course you'd say that. You're a projection 430 00:19:05,579 --> 00:19:07,494 of my unconscious mind. 431 00:19:07,581 --> 00:19:10,627 Whoa, wait a minute. 432 00:19:10,714 --> 00:19:12,107 I'm not dreaming. 433 00:19:14,022 --> 00:19:15,893 I'm lucid dreaming. 434 00:19:18,635 --> 00:19:20,985 This can't be my blood. 435 00:19:21,072 --> 00:19:22,900 I'd be dead. - Yeah, you would be. 436 00:19:22,987 --> 00:19:25,729 - You brought me here. - Couldn't stay at the bar. 437 00:19:25,816 --> 00:19:27,601 Cops were on their way. 438 00:19:30,081 --> 00:19:31,474 I'm not dreaming, am I? 439 00:19:31,561 --> 00:19:33,955 No. 440 00:19:34,042 --> 00:19:36,000 Saint Franks. 441 00:19:36,087 --> 00:19:39,090 In the alley. 442 00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:43,356 Moira, Penelope, LeBron, Isaac. 443 00:19:43,443 --> 00:19:46,576 I mean, Isaac is ashes now, but... 444 00:19:46,663 --> 00:19:49,362 while I was dealing with that, Moira and Penelope got to you. 445 00:19:53,061 --> 00:19:55,150 Look, Reggie, 446 00:19:55,237 --> 00:19:58,240 you were gonna die, man. 447 00:19:58,327 --> 00:19:59,807 I asked you if you wanted to live and you said-- 448 00:19:59,894 --> 00:20:01,635 Okay. 449 00:20:01,722 --> 00:20:03,245 Ooh. 450 00:20:03,332 --> 00:20:05,160 But what did they want from you? 451 00:20:05,247 --> 00:20:08,511 A Regional Director sent them with a list of complaints. 452 00:20:08,598 --> 00:20:09,991 Possible sanctions. 453 00:20:10,078 --> 00:20:13,212 Are--are you in sales? 454 00:20:13,299 --> 00:20:15,039 Reggie, you know what I am, man. 455 00:20:16,867 --> 00:20:19,043 But what did they want from me? 456 00:20:19,130 --> 00:20:21,045 Moira and Penelope like to play with their food. 457 00:20:21,132 --> 00:20:22,917 Oh, no. 458 00:20:23,004 --> 00:20:25,398 [breathing heavily] 459 00:20:25,485 --> 00:20:27,791 No. 460 00:20:27,878 --> 00:20:30,968 Vampires are not real. 461 00:20:31,055 --> 00:20:32,622 They're just a story. - Look, 462 00:20:32,709 --> 00:20:34,450 you're a mother------- vampire, man. 463 00:20:34,537 --> 00:20:36,800 You're undead. 464 00:20:36,887 --> 00:20:38,759 You can never die. 465 00:20:38,846 --> 00:20:40,326 Never grow old. 466 00:20:40,413 --> 00:20:41,718 I mean, you can't die 467 00:20:41,805 --> 00:20:43,807 unless someone stakes you in the heart 468 00:20:43,894 --> 00:20:47,942 or you get stranded in the sun, but that's very, very unlikely. 469 00:20:48,029 --> 00:20:49,639 Can I still eat pizza? 470 00:20:49,726 --> 00:20:51,946 Yeah, go for it. You can eat pizza. 471 00:20:52,033 --> 00:20:54,122 - What about ice cream? - Ice cream, too. 472 00:20:56,777 --> 00:20:58,344 So my taste buds still taste? 473 00:20:58,431 --> 00:20:59,823 I think you're putting a little too much emphasis 474 00:20:59,910 --> 00:21:01,738 on the pizza and the ice cream right now. 475 00:21:01,825 --> 00:21:03,784 But if my digestive system works the way it did before-- 476 00:21:03,871 --> 00:21:05,916 Your taste buds still taste. 477 00:21:06,003 --> 00:21:08,136 But what they wanna taste most of all is blood. 478 00:21:08,223 --> 00:21:09,529 It's the only thing that nourishes you. 479 00:21:09,616 --> 00:21:12,793 Every day? 480 00:21:12,880 --> 00:21:14,403 No, your body will tell you what it needs. 481 00:21:14,490 --> 00:21:17,363 [moody music] 482 00:21:17,450 --> 00:21:20,191 ♪ ♪ 483 00:21:20,279 --> 00:21:22,846 I'm a mother------- vampire. 484 00:21:22,933 --> 00:21:24,370 - Yes. - [laughs] 485 00:21:24,457 --> 00:21:26,633 Yes, that's the spirit. 486 00:21:26,720 --> 00:21:29,200 - Undead. - Completely. 487 00:21:29,288 --> 00:21:33,944 I will never age and never grow old. 488 00:21:34,031 --> 00:21:36,425 All right, now you're just repeating what I said. 489 00:21:36,512 --> 00:21:38,775 Superspeed. Vampires have that, right? 490 00:21:38,862 --> 00:21:42,126 Yeah, I mean, some cases, but it-- 491 00:21:42,213 --> 00:21:45,173 I'm a mother------- vampire. [laughs] 492 00:21:45,260 --> 00:21:46,653 We're gonna have to workshop that catchphrase. 493 00:21:46,740 --> 00:21:47,871 Superspeed! 494 00:21:47,958 --> 00:21:49,743 Whoo! 495 00:21:49,830 --> 00:21:51,745 I'm a mother------- vamp-- 496 00:21:51,832 --> 00:21:54,225 [groans] 497 00:21:54,313 --> 00:21:55,270 [laughs] 498 00:21:55,357 --> 00:21:57,359 [dramatic beat] 499 00:22:01,189 --> 00:22:02,321 [text sending] 500 00:22:06,629 --> 00:22:08,892 [thudding] 501 00:22:10,590 --> 00:22:12,418 [groans] 502 00:22:14,724 --> 00:22:17,031 [grunts] 503 00:22:17,118 --> 00:22:19,860 - Do not try that again, man. - Yeah, no shit. 504 00:22:19,947 --> 00:22:21,644 Why am I breathing? Why am I sweating? 505 00:22:21,731 --> 00:22:23,951 I'm supposed to be dead. 506 00:22:24,038 --> 00:22:25,866 Well, the thing that makes us vampires, 507 00:22:25,953 --> 00:22:28,695 it alters the functions of every system. 508 00:22:28,782 --> 00:22:31,045 All right, that's how we can heal so fast. 509 00:22:31,132 --> 00:22:33,917 But our organs, they still work the same. 510 00:22:34,004 --> 00:22:35,615 It's basically just an acceleration 511 00:22:35,702 --> 00:22:38,357 of your essential nature. 512 00:22:38,444 --> 00:22:40,533 Okay, I was fast before. 513 00:22:40,620 --> 00:22:42,796 Now I'm, like, fast-fast. 514 00:22:42,883 --> 00:22:45,059 And I was strongish, and now I'm crazy strong. 515 00:22:45,146 --> 00:22:46,539 You get it. - Wait. 516 00:22:46,626 --> 00:22:48,584 Did you say superfast healing? 517 00:22:48,671 --> 00:22:51,195 I have that, so that's cool. 518 00:22:51,282 --> 00:22:53,676 Yeah, that's cool, but, um... 519 00:22:53,763 --> 00:22:56,375 look, the, uh... 520 00:22:56,462 --> 00:22:58,594 the enhancements of every vampire 521 00:22:58,681 --> 00:23:00,814 are relative to the condition they're in 522 00:23:00,901 --> 00:23:03,643 at the time of their change. 523 00:23:03,730 --> 00:23:06,776 Because the body they die with... 524 00:23:06,863 --> 00:23:08,082 is the body they'll have forever. 525 00:23:08,169 --> 00:23:11,390 Whoa, wait. 526 00:23:11,477 --> 00:23:13,740 What? 527 00:23:13,827 --> 00:23:15,132 I'm like this forever, 528 00:23:15,219 --> 00:23:16,612 and I can't do anything about it, 529 00:23:16,699 --> 00:23:17,831 and you didn't say anything until now? 530 00:23:17,918 --> 00:23:19,223 Yeah. 531 00:23:19,310 --> 00:23:21,487 [sighs] 532 00:23:21,574 --> 00:23:23,271 Dieting isn't an option. 533 00:23:23,358 --> 00:23:24,315 But was it ever? 534 00:23:24,403 --> 00:23:26,405 You know what I mean. 535 00:23:26,492 --> 00:23:27,754 No dieting, all right, but look, 536 00:23:27,841 --> 00:23:29,320 we got other problems, okay? 537 00:23:29,408 --> 00:23:30,365 Given your shape and size-- 538 00:23:30,452 --> 00:23:31,671 You can say "fat." 539 00:23:31,758 --> 00:23:32,889 I'm not afraid of the word. 540 00:23:32,976 --> 00:23:35,109 Okay, fat. Yeah. 541 00:23:35,196 --> 00:23:36,806 Being a fat vampire, 542 00:23:36,893 --> 00:23:38,112 that's gonna cause some problems 543 00:23:38,199 --> 00:23:40,027 within the vampire community. 544 00:23:40,114 --> 00:23:41,985 Oh, like with your friends that I met in the parking lot? 545 00:23:42,072 --> 00:23:43,509 Yeah. 546 00:23:43,596 --> 00:23:45,641 Yeah, they were assholes before they died. 547 00:23:45,728 --> 00:23:49,340 Vain, bigoted, fat-shaming bullies. 548 00:23:49,428 --> 00:23:50,951 I'm not unfamiliar with the attitude. 549 00:23:51,038 --> 00:23:53,519 Okay. Okay. 550 00:23:53,606 --> 00:23:56,652 So then you understand why we gotta keep this all low-key 551 00:23:56,739 --> 00:23:59,307 until I can figure out the consequences. 552 00:23:59,394 --> 00:24:01,962 Are you saying that I may not be welcome 553 00:24:02,049 --> 00:24:03,442 in the vampire community? 554 00:24:03,529 --> 00:24:05,835 That they pose a threat to me? 555 00:24:05,922 --> 00:24:08,490 [melancholic music] 556 00:24:08,577 --> 00:24:11,101 Some things never change. 557 00:24:11,188 --> 00:24:12,973 I'm gonna be like this forever. 558 00:24:13,060 --> 00:24:17,543 ♪ ♪ 559 00:24:17,630 --> 00:24:19,893 If you always do what you've always done, 560 00:24:19,980 --> 00:24:22,809 you'll always get what you've always got. 561 00:24:22,896 --> 00:24:25,159 That's a mouthful. 562 00:24:25,246 --> 00:24:26,682 Henry Ford said it. 563 00:24:26,769 --> 00:24:28,858 [scoffs] Yeah? 564 00:24:28,945 --> 00:24:30,686 Well, Henry Ford believed 565 00:24:30,773 --> 00:24:34,647 Jews invented jazz to corrupt America, so-- 566 00:24:34,734 --> 00:24:37,301 Point taken. 567 00:24:37,388 --> 00:24:39,129 Sun's coming. 568 00:24:39,216 --> 00:24:41,044 Time to go home. 569 00:24:41,131 --> 00:24:43,612 ♪ ♪ 570 00:24:49,444 --> 00:24:50,880 [children playing in distance] 571 00:24:50,967 --> 00:24:53,840 [peaceful music] 572 00:24:53,927 --> 00:25:00,890 ♪ ♪ 573 00:25:31,399 --> 00:25:34,010 [phone chimes] 574 00:25:42,323 --> 00:25:44,194 I'm okay. 575 00:25:44,281 --> 00:25:46,936 I'm okay. 576 00:25:47,023 --> 00:25:48,416 I'm okay. 577 00:25:56,119 --> 00:25:58,731 I'm okay. 578 00:25:58,818 --> 00:26:00,036 I'm okay. 579 00:26:05,346 --> 00:26:08,262 [sizzling] [screaming] 580 00:26:08,349 --> 00:26:11,570 [intense music] 581 00:26:22,668 --> 00:26:25,627 [gasps] 582 00:26:25,714 --> 00:26:28,587 [light quirky music] 583 00:26:28,674 --> 00:26:35,594 ♪ ♪ 584 00:26:39,075 --> 00:26:41,425 [sizzles] Ow. 585 00:26:41,512 --> 00:26:46,213 ♪ ♪ 586 00:26:49,129 --> 00:26:51,174 [sighs] 587 00:26:54,613 --> 00:26:57,441 Long story-- 588 00:26:57,528 --> 00:26:59,661 [message sending] 589 00:27:01,968 --> 00:27:08,888 ♪ ♪ 590 00:27:15,677 --> 00:27:17,287 [sighs] 591 00:27:17,374 --> 00:27:21,161 [pop music playing] 592 00:27:21,248 --> 00:27:25,687 So, Reginald, how was the big date? 593 00:27:27,776 --> 00:27:30,431 Sarah's got the late shift tonight, right? 594 00:27:30,518 --> 00:27:31,650 Dinner and a movie. 595 00:27:31,737 --> 00:27:33,216 That was the deal, right? 596 00:27:33,303 --> 00:27:35,828 You and... 597 00:27:35,915 --> 00:27:37,351 Sarah. 598 00:27:37,438 --> 00:27:40,441 God, you know what I can't figure out is 599 00:27:40,528 --> 00:27:45,315 why would she waste her time on an obvious loser like you? 600 00:27:45,402 --> 00:27:47,753 ♪ ♪ 601 00:27:47,840 --> 00:27:49,232 I mean, unless this is like [laughing] 602 00:27:49,319 --> 00:27:53,497 one of those Make-A-Wish pity parties. 603 00:27:53,584 --> 00:27:57,588 Or maybe Sarah's just a loser like you. 604 00:27:57,676 --> 00:27:59,416 Keep her name out of your mouth. 605 00:27:59,503 --> 00:28:01,375 I don't care what you think about me, 606 00:28:01,462 --> 00:28:04,247 but if you ever talk shit about Sarah again-- 607 00:28:04,334 --> 00:28:06,336 Take it easy, Reg. 608 00:28:06,423 --> 00:28:07,990 Just kidding around. 609 00:28:10,558 --> 00:28:13,430 [heartbeat thumping] 610 00:28:13,517 --> 00:28:15,084 Didn't mean any of it. 611 00:28:15,171 --> 00:28:16,651 [thumping continues] 612 00:28:16,738 --> 00:28:19,654 [tense music] 613 00:28:21,787 --> 00:28:24,137 Freak! 614 00:28:24,224 --> 00:28:27,009 [panting] 615 00:28:30,447 --> 00:28:33,015 ♪ ♪ 616 00:28:33,102 --> 00:28:36,497 Mmm. 617 00:28:36,584 --> 00:28:38,368 Mmm, mmm. - Oh, my. 618 00:28:38,455 --> 00:28:40,719 What am I seeing here? - [retches] 619 00:28:43,678 --> 00:28:46,289 Binge eating disorder, also known as BED, 620 00:28:46,376 --> 00:28:48,639 is a life-threatening condition usually accompanied 621 00:28:48,727 --> 00:28:51,338 by debilitating guilt and shame. 622 00:28:51,425 --> 00:28:53,122 The good news is that there are effective treatments, 623 00:28:53,209 --> 00:28:55,298 starting with psychotherapy. 624 00:28:55,385 --> 00:28:56,386 [burps] My Aunt Joyce 625 00:28:56,473 --> 00:28:58,562 suffered from BED. 626 00:28:58,649 --> 00:29:01,740 Therapy helped her to address the physical, biological, 627 00:29:01,827 --> 00:29:03,959 interpersonal, and cultural forces 628 00:29:04,046 --> 00:29:05,874 attributing to her condition. [heartbeat pounding] 629 00:29:05,961 --> 00:29:07,920 I'm gonna give you the name of her therapist. 630 00:29:08,007 --> 00:29:11,706 Now, insurance is going to be a nightmare, 631 00:29:11,793 --> 00:29:14,448 and too bad you don't live in the Netherlands. 632 00:29:14,535 --> 00:29:16,406 [whirring] But the important thing is 633 00:29:16,493 --> 00:29:18,234 that you get the help that you-- 634 00:29:18,321 --> 00:29:20,106 [whooshing] 635 00:29:21,847 --> 00:29:23,326 Reginald? 636 00:29:23,413 --> 00:29:26,286 So on a scale of one to "what the----," 637 00:29:26,373 --> 00:29:28,114 good or bad day? 638 00:29:28,201 --> 00:29:29,855 Does it look like I'm having a good day right now? 639 00:29:29,942 --> 00:29:31,726 - Well, hope springs-- - Eternal? 640 00:29:31,813 --> 00:29:33,293 [laughs] I get it. 641 00:29:33,380 --> 00:29:36,513 Like the eternal hunger burning me inside. 642 00:29:36,600 --> 00:29:39,255 I can't look at people without seeing their veins 643 00:29:39,342 --> 00:29:41,910 or smelling their blood. 644 00:29:41,997 --> 00:29:44,957 - Well, they're food. - They are not food to me. 645 00:29:45,044 --> 00:29:46,567 What made you think coming into work tonight 646 00:29:46,654 --> 00:29:48,438 was a good idea? 647 00:29:48,525 --> 00:29:50,527 I missed my date with Sarah because I was being turned 648 00:29:50,614 --> 00:29:52,225 into an undead creature of the night. 649 00:29:52,312 --> 00:29:54,923 I wanted to say I'm sorry. - You need to feed, man. 650 00:29:55,010 --> 00:29:56,403 Or else everyone you see 651 00:29:56,490 --> 00:29:57,621 is gonna look like a damn blood bag. 652 00:29:57,708 --> 00:29:59,014 You understand me? 653 00:29:59,101 --> 00:30:00,494 But I don't wanna kill anyone. 654 00:30:00,581 --> 00:30:02,191 You don't have to. 655 00:30:02,278 --> 00:30:04,585 All right? Drink what you need. 656 00:30:04,672 --> 00:30:06,717 Make them forget you drank. 657 00:30:06,805 --> 00:30:08,241 Just glamour yourself some dinner. 658 00:30:10,721 --> 00:30:12,419 Listen to me. 659 00:30:15,814 --> 00:30:18,077 - Sorry, not feeling it. - [laughs] 660 00:30:18,164 --> 00:30:20,557 Dude, this was just for demonstration purposes. 661 00:30:20,644 --> 00:30:23,256 Vampires can't glamour other vampires, all right? 662 00:30:23,343 --> 00:30:25,824 Now you try. 663 00:30:25,911 --> 00:30:28,435 [hesitantly] Listen to me. 664 00:30:28,522 --> 00:30:30,263 Nah. 665 00:30:30,350 --> 00:30:31,481 No, you gotta lean into it more. 666 00:30:31,568 --> 00:30:32,526 Say it like you mean it. 667 00:30:34,267 --> 00:30:36,182 - Listen to me. - Mm. 668 00:30:36,269 --> 00:30:37,618 There you go. 669 00:30:37,705 --> 00:30:39,011 Look, you got this, man. 670 00:30:39,098 --> 00:30:40,664 Just tap into that big brain of yours. 671 00:30:40,751 --> 00:30:42,231 How do you know I have a big brain? 672 00:30:42,318 --> 00:30:43,754 Dude, I'm your maker. 673 00:30:43,842 --> 00:30:46,322 I know everything about you. 674 00:30:46,409 --> 00:30:47,497 One more thing. 675 00:30:47,584 --> 00:30:49,369 Until you feed, 676 00:30:49,456 --> 00:30:50,674 everyone you know is at risk. 677 00:30:50,761 --> 00:30:52,720 Sarah is at risk, 678 00:30:52,807 --> 00:30:54,809 and I know you don't want that. 679 00:30:54,896 --> 00:30:56,463 I'd rather step into the sun. 680 00:30:56,550 --> 00:30:59,205 So you owe her more than an apology. 681 00:30:59,292 --> 00:31:01,337 We both know it. 682 00:31:01,424 --> 00:31:03,818 [sighs] 683 00:31:05,602 --> 00:31:08,083 [door shuts] 684 00:31:08,170 --> 00:31:10,303 What happened to you? 685 00:31:10,390 --> 00:31:12,566 I thought you were working tonight. 686 00:31:16,483 --> 00:31:19,965 We need to break up. 687 00:31:20,052 --> 00:31:23,533 I didn't know we were together. 688 00:31:23,620 --> 00:31:25,274 I mean, 689 00:31:25,361 --> 00:31:28,538 we can't see each other anymore. 690 00:31:28,625 --> 00:31:31,715 We never did see each other, though. 691 00:31:31,802 --> 00:31:34,240 I don't wanna go on a date with you anymore. 692 00:31:34,327 --> 00:31:36,677 And it was a mistake to ask you in the first place. 693 00:31:36,764 --> 00:31:38,374 Okay. 694 00:31:38,461 --> 00:31:41,203 Sure. Whatever. 695 00:31:41,290 --> 00:31:44,076 [eerie music] 696 00:31:44,163 --> 00:31:50,734 ♪ ♪ 697 00:31:53,563 --> 00:31:55,478 [crying] 698 00:31:55,565 --> 00:31:58,438 [somber guitar music] 699 00:31:58,525 --> 00:32:05,401 ♪ ♪ 700 00:32:24,899 --> 00:32:27,162 I knew it was you without even looking. 701 00:32:29,251 --> 00:32:32,515 I'm your maker, man. 702 00:32:32,602 --> 00:32:34,300 We share blood. 703 00:32:34,387 --> 00:32:37,477 That's a powerful connection. 704 00:32:37,564 --> 00:32:40,480 Look, wherever you are... 705 00:32:40,567 --> 00:32:43,613 I know where you are. 706 00:32:43,700 --> 00:32:46,138 Whatever you're feeling, 707 00:32:46,225 --> 00:32:50,316 I feel it too, Reggie. 708 00:32:50,403 --> 00:32:52,535 [somber music] 709 00:32:52,622 --> 00:32:55,930 My mom and dad moved to Hawaii. 710 00:32:56,017 --> 00:32:57,540 They love the sun. 711 00:33:00,456 --> 00:33:02,502 I'm never gonna see them again, am I? 712 00:33:02,589 --> 00:33:06,680 ♪ ♪ 713 00:33:06,767 --> 00:33:08,073 Probably not. 714 00:33:08,160 --> 00:33:14,557 ♪ ♪ 715 00:33:14,644 --> 00:33:16,124 Did you ever see your parents? 716 00:33:16,211 --> 00:33:18,083 Yeah. 717 00:33:18,170 --> 00:33:19,432 Just once. 718 00:33:19,519 --> 00:33:23,523 My mom's this force of nature. 719 00:33:23,610 --> 00:33:25,786 She's the reason I got my bachelor of science degree 720 00:33:25,873 --> 00:33:28,093 in business administration. 721 00:33:30,834 --> 00:33:33,576 She thought it could open any door for me. 722 00:33:33,663 --> 00:33:38,190 And the Slushy Shack was just-- 723 00:33:38,277 --> 00:33:41,976 was just supposed to be research for a term paper. 724 00:33:42,063 --> 00:33:44,761 Two years later, I'm still here. 725 00:33:44,848 --> 00:33:46,415 But you stayed, huh? 726 00:33:46,502 --> 00:33:49,984 Student loans are the undead loans of loans. 727 00:33:50,071 --> 00:33:51,594 They're eternal. 728 00:33:51,681 --> 00:33:55,207 Yeah. 729 00:33:55,294 --> 00:33:57,296 I didn't like my life much. 730 00:33:58,775 --> 00:34:01,561 ♪ ♪ 731 00:34:01,648 --> 00:34:06,696 It was problematic in a lot of ways, but... 732 00:34:06,783 --> 00:34:08,307 I think I'm gonna miss it, and I don't think 733 00:34:08,394 --> 00:34:11,397 that feeling's ever gonna go away. 734 00:34:11,484 --> 00:34:14,487 It will, Reggie. 735 00:34:14,574 --> 00:34:16,402 [sighs] 736 00:34:16,489 --> 00:34:19,231 Trust me. 737 00:34:19,318 --> 00:34:23,191 One day, your old life, it's just gonna seem like... 738 00:34:26,107 --> 00:34:29,763 Like a dream you had. 739 00:34:29,850 --> 00:34:32,809 One of those lucid ones. 740 00:34:32,896 --> 00:34:35,421 Are you 100% sure about that? 741 00:34:37,597 --> 00:34:39,642 Yeah. 742 00:34:39,729 --> 00:34:41,383 100%. 743 00:34:41,470 --> 00:34:44,343 [funky music] 744 00:34:44,430 --> 00:34:51,350 ♪ ♪ 745 00:34:56,659 --> 00:34:58,618 Look, a lot of these kids never had breakfast 746 00:34:58,705 --> 00:35:01,142 before we started the program. 747 00:35:01,229 --> 00:35:03,405 Every grocer in the neighborhood donates. 748 00:35:03,492 --> 00:35:05,799 You need to donate. 749 00:35:05,886 --> 00:35:08,584 - Angela. - Yeah, let me call you back. 750 00:35:11,021 --> 00:35:13,328 What happened there, young soldier? 751 00:35:13,415 --> 00:35:17,550 Kids wrenched open a hydrant, playing in the water. 752 00:35:17,637 --> 00:35:21,206 Cop roughed 'em up for no good reason at all. 753 00:35:21,293 --> 00:35:23,991 Guess I took exception to that. 754 00:35:24,078 --> 00:35:25,601 Looks like it. 755 00:35:25,688 --> 00:35:27,777 [laughs] Yeah. 756 00:35:27,864 --> 00:35:30,128 Yeah, wrong end of a nightstick, what I get. 757 00:35:34,741 --> 00:35:36,699 Why don't you and I go out tonight? 758 00:35:36,786 --> 00:35:39,311 Talk about what it is that you get. 759 00:35:44,142 --> 00:35:47,232 Hey, what were those, uh-- the cocktails we had? 760 00:35:49,103 --> 00:35:52,193 - Mai tais. - Yeah, yeah. 761 00:35:52,280 --> 00:35:54,674 Yeah, they got cool little umbrellas. 762 00:35:54,761 --> 00:35:56,284 [laughs] 763 00:35:58,547 --> 00:36:01,159 What is it that you want, Maurice, 764 00:36:01,246 --> 00:36:03,987 out there in the world? 765 00:36:04,074 --> 00:36:06,816 What is it that you want? 766 00:36:06,903 --> 00:36:08,427 [tense music] 767 00:36:08,514 --> 00:36:09,819 Justice. 768 00:36:09,906 --> 00:36:13,519 ♪ ♪ 769 00:36:13,606 --> 00:36:16,609 And how's that going for you? 770 00:36:16,696 --> 00:36:20,003 Well, how do you think? 771 00:36:20,090 --> 00:36:24,094 What if I told you there was another way to fight? 772 00:36:24,182 --> 00:36:27,968 A way to break those mother-------. 773 00:36:28,055 --> 00:36:32,059 I'd want you to tell me exactly what it was. 774 00:36:32,146 --> 00:36:34,540 And then I'd break 'em. 775 00:36:34,627 --> 00:36:36,194 [chuckles] 776 00:36:38,805 --> 00:36:41,329 It's a change, Maurice. 777 00:36:43,636 --> 00:36:47,683 And I can do that for you. 778 00:36:47,770 --> 00:36:50,860 If you give me your permission. 779 00:36:50,947 --> 00:36:54,299 ♪ ♪ 780 00:36:54,386 --> 00:36:56,126 Is this change something you did? 781 00:36:57,954 --> 00:36:59,347 It is. 782 00:37:01,871 --> 00:37:03,873 And when'd you do that? 783 00:37:03,960 --> 00:37:05,005 Huh? 784 00:37:07,050 --> 00:37:08,487 [sighs] Let's just say 785 00:37:08,574 --> 00:37:11,185 this isn't my first revolution. 786 00:37:11,272 --> 00:37:13,318 Wait, what? 787 00:37:13,405 --> 00:37:14,754 Angie. 788 00:37:14,841 --> 00:37:17,800 [hisses, sniffs deeply] 789 00:37:17,887 --> 00:37:20,586 Look, Angie, you didn't need to tell me some story 790 00:37:20,673 --> 00:37:21,804 if all you wanted was sex. 791 00:37:21,891 --> 00:37:23,980 I'm not asking for sex, Maurice. 792 00:37:24,067 --> 00:37:25,982 Well, I'm getting some seriously mixed vibes 793 00:37:26,069 --> 00:37:27,854 right now. - Do you want to fight? 794 00:37:27,941 --> 00:37:29,943 I said that. Clearly. 795 00:37:30,030 --> 00:37:33,599 Do I have your permission? 796 00:37:33,686 --> 00:37:35,644 Look, do what you gotta do, but I think you're confused 797 00:37:35,731 --> 00:37:36,732 what's happening here. 798 00:37:36,819 --> 00:37:38,865 [hisses] 799 00:37:38,952 --> 00:37:42,825 Do I have your permission? 800 00:37:42,912 --> 00:37:45,785 [tense percussive music] 801 00:37:45,872 --> 00:37:49,615 ♪ ♪ 802 00:37:49,702 --> 00:37:52,531 - [screaming] - [slurping] 803 00:37:52,618 --> 00:37:55,577 ♪ ♪ 804 00:37:55,664 --> 00:37:57,231 Ahh. 805 00:37:57,318 --> 00:38:00,713 [grunts] 806 00:38:00,800 --> 00:38:07,197 ♪ ♪ 807 00:38:08,373 --> 00:38:09,809 I think I like your origin story 808 00:38:09,896 --> 00:38:11,767 better than my origin story. 809 00:38:13,769 --> 00:38:15,293 What happened to Angela? 810 00:38:17,207 --> 00:38:19,035 I don't wanna talk about Angela. 811 00:38:21,690 --> 00:38:24,389 Did she teach you how to live like this? 812 00:38:24,476 --> 00:38:26,521 Nah. 813 00:38:26,608 --> 00:38:28,218 No, I had to learn that on my own. 814 00:38:30,003 --> 00:38:31,613 Is that a rule? 815 00:38:33,354 --> 00:38:34,660 - Why? - Well, I'm hoping 816 00:38:34,747 --> 00:38:35,922 you'll teach me. 817 00:38:36,009 --> 00:38:37,837 Yeah. 818 00:38:37,924 --> 00:38:39,273 I can do that. 819 00:38:39,360 --> 00:38:41,754 I'm also hoping you'll be my friend. 820 00:38:41,841 --> 00:38:45,453 Look, Reggie, I got rules about friends. 821 00:38:45,540 --> 00:38:47,237 Sooner or later, you know-- - Please. 822 00:38:47,325 --> 00:38:49,239 [laughs] 823 00:38:51,198 --> 00:38:53,853 Yeah. Yeah, I can do that, too. 824 00:38:58,118 --> 00:39:01,469 That night behind the Slushy Shack... 825 00:39:01,556 --> 00:39:03,341 were you going to feed on me? 826 00:39:05,734 --> 00:39:07,823 Yup. [laughs] 827 00:39:07,910 --> 00:39:09,782 Why didn't you? 828 00:39:12,915 --> 00:39:14,787 I don't know, man. 829 00:39:16,615 --> 00:39:21,533 I guess I'm a-- a sucker for true romance. 830 00:39:21,620 --> 00:39:24,187 [laughs] 831 00:39:27,800 --> 00:39:29,628 We should have told her last night. 832 00:39:29,715 --> 00:39:32,326 She will not be pleased. 833 00:39:32,413 --> 00:39:33,719 It's not our fault. 834 00:39:33,806 --> 00:39:35,024 Maurice killed Isaac. 835 00:39:35,111 --> 00:39:37,375 Off with his head. 836 00:39:40,639 --> 00:39:42,728 She will understand. 837 00:39:42,815 --> 00:39:46,384 And she will make him suffer. 838 00:39:49,648 --> 00:39:52,172 We summoned Maurice, as you requested. 839 00:39:52,259 --> 00:39:53,826 But he ignored your command. 840 00:39:53,913 --> 00:39:57,395 So I ate his companion. 841 00:39:57,482 --> 00:40:00,876 - Maurice killed Isaac. - Isaac is very much dust. 842 00:40:00,963 --> 00:40:03,879 His companion tasted of Cornish pasty. 843 00:40:03,966 --> 00:40:06,839 [foreboding music] 844 00:40:06,926 --> 00:40:13,106 ♪ ♪ 845 00:40:13,193 --> 00:40:17,545 You ate his companion? 846 00:40:17,632 --> 00:40:18,981 I was hungry. 847 00:40:19,068 --> 00:40:22,115 Well, did you dispose of the body? 848 00:40:22,202 --> 00:40:23,725 Maurice chased us away. 849 00:40:25,640 --> 00:40:27,207 There was no time. 850 00:40:27,294 --> 00:40:30,602 So you just left evidence of your hunger 851 00:40:30,689 --> 00:40:33,431 for others to find. 852 00:40:33,518 --> 00:40:36,738 I fear no living man or woman. 853 00:40:39,611 --> 00:40:41,134 [gasping] [sloshing] 854 00:40:41,221 --> 00:40:43,571 [dramatic music] 855 00:40:43,658 --> 00:40:45,443 [both gasp] 856 00:40:45,530 --> 00:40:47,053 Do you fear me? 857 00:40:49,708 --> 00:40:51,100 Justice dispensed. 858 00:40:51,187 --> 00:40:53,015 Justice deserved. 859 00:40:53,102 --> 00:40:54,364 - Spare us. - Please. 860 00:40:54,452 --> 00:40:56,192 Please. 861 00:40:58,281 --> 00:41:00,980 Tell me about Maurice's companion. 862 00:41:07,682 --> 00:41:09,205 [exhales heavily] 863 00:41:09,292 --> 00:41:11,077 [light percussive music] 864 00:41:11,164 --> 00:41:12,687 Page 44. "Post-Grammy win, 865 00:41:12,774 --> 00:41:14,646 a new world is opening up for Megan Thee Stallion." 866 00:41:14,733 --> 00:41:17,257 ♪ ♪ 867 00:41:17,344 --> 00:41:19,999 [laughs] Oh. 868 00:41:20,086 --> 00:41:22,218 ♪ ♪ 869 00:41:22,305 --> 00:41:24,046 Page 62. 870 00:41:24,133 --> 00:41:27,267 "By late 1979, Prince and the Revolution 871 00:41:27,354 --> 00:41:29,312 start to play their first club showcases." 872 00:41:29,399 --> 00:41:32,968 ♪ ♪ 873 00:41:33,055 --> 00:41:36,015 [laughs] 874 00:41:38,757 --> 00:41:44,110 ♪ ♪ 875 00:41:44,197 --> 00:41:46,460 Page 377. [knocking at door] 876 00:41:46,547 --> 00:41:48,636 Maurice. 877 00:41:48,723 --> 00:41:50,595 You won't believe what I can do. 878 00:41:52,248 --> 00:41:53,815 Hi. 879 00:41:53,902 --> 00:41:55,643 This may come as a surprise to you, 880 00:41:55,730 --> 00:41:57,471 and it probably interferes with your plan 881 00:41:57,558 --> 00:41:58,907 to break up with me, 882 00:41:58,994 --> 00:42:00,430 even though we were never together. 883 00:42:00,518 --> 00:42:02,258 But I gave it some thought, 884 00:42:02,345 --> 00:42:05,348 and I reject your imaginary breakup 885 00:42:05,435 --> 00:42:07,525 and think that you and I need to have 886 00:42:07,612 --> 00:42:09,135 an open and honest conversation 887 00:42:09,222 --> 00:42:11,441 about what's going on between us. 888 00:42:11,529 --> 00:42:14,314 Because I know how you look at me 889 00:42:14,401 --> 00:42:16,577 when you think I'm not looking. 890 00:42:16,664 --> 00:42:20,929 But what you don't know is how I sometimes... 891 00:42:21,016 --> 00:42:22,801 look at you. 892 00:42:22,888 --> 00:42:25,630 [soft sentimental music] 893 00:42:25,717 --> 00:42:27,545 [gulps] 894 00:42:28,807 --> 00:42:31,984 Can I come in now, please? 895 00:42:32,071 --> 00:42:34,334 - Okay. - Okay. 896 00:42:34,421 --> 00:42:35,683 [tense music] 897 00:42:35,770 --> 00:42:37,598 [breathing shakily] 898 00:42:37,685 --> 00:42:39,992 [music intensifies] 899 00:42:40,079 --> 00:42:42,298 [hisses] 900 00:42:46,389 --> 00:42:49,305 [moody guitar music] 901 00:42:49,392 --> 00:42:56,312 ♪ ♪ 902 00:42:56,362 --> 00:43:00,912 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 59870

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