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1
00:00:01,267 --> 00:00:04,170
(I Love Lucy theme music plays)
2
00:00:25,558 --> 00:00:26,559
ETHEL: Yoo-hoo!
3
00:00:26,559 --> 00:00:28,028
Yoo-hoo!
4
00:00:28,528 --> 00:00:30,814
Morning, Lucy, I brought up your
mail.
5
00:00:30,814 --> 00:00:33,316
Thanks, Ethel.
6
00:00:34,818 --> 00:00:37,821
A bill, a bill, a letter for Ricky,
an ad...
7
00:00:37,821 --> 00:00:40,323
Oh, a postcard, isn't that pretty.
8
00:00:40,323 --> 00:00:41,825
Oh, it's from the Bishers.
9
00:00:41,825 --> 00:00:43,326
"Dear Ricky and Lucy:
10
00:00:43,326 --> 00:00:46,329
"Having a wonderful time here in
Miami.
11
00:00:46,329 --> 00:00:48,548
"Leaving tomorrow for the uh, uh...
12
00:00:48,548 --> 00:00:49,749
Everglades.
13
00:00:49,749 --> 00:00:52,218
"The Everglades.
14
00:00:52,218 --> 00:00:53,820
"Ben has been fishing
15
00:00:53,820 --> 00:00:56,623
"and last week caught a 115-pound,
uh...
16
00:00:56,623 --> 00:00:57,974
Sailfish.
17
00:00:57,974 --> 00:00:59,359
"Sa..."
18
00:00:59,359 --> 00:01:02,062
Well, go ahead, tell me what the rest
of the card says.
19
00:01:02,062 --> 00:01:03,296
Getting a wonderful tan.
20
00:01:03,296 --> 00:01:05,698
We'll call you when we get home next
week.
21
00:01:05,698 --> 00:01:06,933
Love, Edna and Ben.
22
00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:10,904
What time was it postmarked?
23
00:01:10,904 --> 00:01:12,939
4:30.
24
00:01:12,939 --> 00:01:14,641
A.M. or P.M.?
25
00:01:14,641 --> 00:01:15,859
Really, Ethel, I'm surprised at you!
26
00:01:15,859 --> 00:01:17,861
You know, this is a federal offense.
27
00:01:17,861 --> 00:01:19,362
If it wasn't for our friendship,
28
00:01:19,362 --> 00:01:21,364
I'd turn you over to the FBI.
29
00:01:21,364 --> 00:01:22,866
Thanks, terribly.
30
00:01:22,866 --> 00:01:23,867
No, really, I mean it.
31
00:01:23,867 --> 00:01:25,869
Reading another person's mail is just
awful.
32
00:01:25,869 --> 00:01:28,171
A person's mail is something sacred.
33
00:01:28,171 --> 00:01:29,672
It's like, like a diary.
34
00:01:29,672 --> 00:01:31,174
Why, Ricky and I wouldn't think
35
00:01:31,174 --> 00:01:32,675
of reading each other's mail.
36
00:01:32,675 --> 00:01:34,527
Now, take this letter, for instance.
37
00:01:34,527 --> 00:01:35,728
It's addressed to Ricky
38
00:01:35,728 --> 00:01:37,464
and it's from the War Department.
39
00:01:37,464 --> 00:01:39,599
Now, I'm curious, but I'm certainly
not going to...
40
00:01:39,599 --> 00:01:40,884
War Department?!
41
00:01:40,884 --> 00:01:44,888
Gee, you don't think Ricky's been...
42
00:01:44,888 --> 00:01:45,889
been...
43
00:01:45,889 --> 00:01:47,107
Drafted!
44
00:01:47,107 --> 00:01:48,475
Oh, please, Ethel.
45
00:01:48,475 --> 00:01:50,977
I, I wasn't going to say it out loud.
46
00:01:50,977 --> 00:01:53,980
Oh, look!
47
00:01:56,049 --> 00:01:57,283
Cheap glue.
48
00:02:00,570 --> 00:02:02,522
"You are hereby ordered to report
49
00:02:02,922 --> 00:02:05,325
to Fort Dix, New Jersey, Monday at
3:00."
50
00:02:05,325 --> 00:02:07,760
And it's signed, "Maurice Thompson,
51
00:02:07,760 --> 00:02:09,879
Colonel Infantry Commanding Officer."
52
00:02:09,879 --> 00:02:11,331
It's true!
53
00:02:11,831 --> 00:02:13,833
Ricky's been drafted!
54
00:02:13,833 --> 00:02:16,336
Now, Lucy, you've got to be brave.
55
00:02:16,803 --> 00:02:18,805
I'll be brave.
56
00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:22,642
(wailing)
57
00:02:22,642 --> 00:02:24,310
Is that being brave?
58
00:02:24,310 --> 00:02:27,564
It is for a coward like me.
59
00:02:27,564 --> 00:02:29,065
Oh, now, Lucy, pull yourself
together.
60
00:02:29,065 --> 00:02:31,067
You know what you ought to do?
61
00:02:31,067 --> 00:02:32,569
What?
62
00:02:32,569 --> 00:02:33,570
Go downtown and buy a new hat.
63
00:02:33,570 --> 00:02:36,072
Oh, Ethel, please don't make jokes.
64
00:02:36,072 --> 00:02:37,574
I'm not joking.
65
00:02:37,574 --> 00:02:39,576
It'll take your mind off your
troubles.
66
00:02:39,576 --> 00:02:41,578
No use sitting around here moping.
67
00:02:41,578 --> 00:02:43,580
Well, maybe shopping would help,
68
00:02:43,580 --> 00:02:45,081
and while I'm downtown, I'll buy some
yarn
69
00:02:45,081 --> 00:02:48,585
so I can knit Ricky some socks to
wear with his uniform.
70
00:02:48,585 --> 00:02:50,587
That's a good idea!
Now, get your coat.
71
00:02:50,587 --> 00:02:51,588
All right.
72
00:02:51,588 --> 00:02:54,090
Oh, I got to glue this back together
again..
73
00:02:54,090 --> 00:02:55,592
I'll fix it.
74
00:02:55,592 --> 00:02:57,093
I've had lots of practice at this.
75
00:02:57,093 --> 00:02:58,094
Oh, all right.
76
00:02:58,094 --> 00:02:59,596
Oh, you know, I know where
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00:02:59,596 --> 00:03:01,297
there's a dilly of a hat!
78
00:03:01,297 --> 00:03:03,716
To take my mind off my troubles, you
know.
79
00:03:03,716 --> 00:03:05,051
Yes.
80
00:03:05,051 --> 00:03:06,052
Yes.
81
00:03:24,537 --> 00:03:26,139
FRED: Ethel!
82
00:03:26,139 --> 00:03:27,740
Hiya, Fred.
83
00:03:30,159 --> 00:03:31,828
Hi, Rick, is Ethel up here?
84
00:03:31,828 --> 00:03:33,329
No, I haven't seen her.
85
00:03:33,329 --> 00:03:36,082
She and Lucy must be out shopping
someplace.
86
00:03:36,082 --> 00:03:39,085
Uh-oh, that'll cost me.
87
00:03:39,085 --> 00:03:40,753
Hey, we got a card from the Bishers.
88
00:03:40,753 --> 00:03:41,955
They're in Florida.
89
00:03:41,955 --> 00:03:45,158
Yeah, how do you like that guy
catching a 115-pound sailfish?
90
00:03:46,793 --> 00:03:49,195
How did you know that he caught a
hundred and...
91
00:03:49,195 --> 00:03:50,847
Oh, Ethel.
92
00:03:50,847 --> 00:03:54,350
Some people build model airplanes.
93
00:03:54,350 --> 00:03:56,603
Ethel reads postcards.
94
00:03:56,603 --> 00:04:00,773
Oh, good, I got my orders to go to
Fort Dix Monday.
95
00:04:01,174 --> 00:04:02,609
Orders! Fort Dix!
96
00:04:02,609 --> 00:04:04,110
Hold on, Fred, hold on.
97
00:04:04,110 --> 00:04:05,612
I haven't been drafted.
98
00:04:05,612 --> 00:04:07,113
Take it easy.
99
00:04:07,113 --> 00:04:09,616
No, I'm just taking a show down there
to entertain the boys,
100
00:04:10,116 --> 00:04:11,117
and you know how the Army is.
101
00:04:11,117 --> 00:04:13,620
You can't even scratch yourself
without orders.
102
00:04:13,620 --> 00:04:16,122
A show! Hey, that ought to be a lot
of fun.
103
00:04:16,122 --> 00:04:17,624
Well, why don't you come along?
104
00:04:17,624 --> 00:04:20,326
You can do one of your old Vaudeville
routines?
105
00:04:20,326 --> 00:04:24,097
Great! You know, I used to do a Civil
War act in Vaudeville.
106
00:04:24,097 --> 00:04:27,884
I played the North, and my partner
played the South.
107
00:04:27,884 --> 00:04:29,168
I still got the costumes.
108
00:04:29,168 --> 00:04:29,969
Really?
109
00:04:30,436 --> 00:04:31,437
Want to do it with me?
110
00:04:31,437 --> 00:04:33,539
Why sure, I'll be perfect for it--
111
00:04:33,539 --> 00:04:34,524
Stonewall Ricardo
112
00:04:34,524 --> 00:04:36,025
from south Havana.
113
00:04:37,527 --> 00:04:39,028
I'll show you how the thing goes.
114
00:04:39,028 --> 00:04:39,529
All right, Fred.
115
00:04:40,029 --> 00:04:41,030
Hey, I can use that broom there
116
00:04:41,030 --> 00:04:42,031
for the musket.
117
00:04:42,031 --> 00:04:43,683
Ta da...
118
00:04:43,683 --> 00:04:46,619
(humming "Dixie")
119
00:04:46,619 --> 00:04:49,122
Uh-oh, we're supposed to go out to
dinner Monday night,
120
00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:51,858
but I'll just tell Ethel I'd rather
do this.
121
00:04:51,858 --> 00:04:53,076
Look, whatever you do
122
00:04:53,576 --> 00:04:55,578
don't tell Ethel where you're going
123
00:04:55,578 --> 00:04:58,381
because if you tell Ethel, she'll
tell Lucy,
124
00:04:58,381 --> 00:05:00,883
and Lucy will want to get into the
act.
125
00:05:00,883 --> 00:05:02,735
Well, why don't you let her sing a
song or something?
126
00:05:03,136 --> 00:05:04,637
It wouldn't be patriotic.
127
00:05:04,637 --> 00:05:05,938
Patriotic?
128
00:05:05,938 --> 00:05:07,757
Have you ever heard Lucy sing?
129
00:05:08,257 --> 00:05:09,609
No.
130
00:05:09,609 --> 00:05:14,063
Our fighting men have been through
enough.
131
00:05:14,063 --> 00:05:15,448
Okay, not a word to Ethel.
132
00:05:15,848 --> 00:05:18,217
I'll just tell her I'm not available
Monday night,
133
00:05:18,217 --> 00:05:19,819
and I won't tell her why.
134
00:05:19,819 --> 00:05:22,021
And boy, that'll drive her crazy.
135
00:05:22,021 --> 00:05:22,855
(both chuckling)
136
00:05:22,855 --> 00:05:25,658
Now, spread out and I'll show you how
this thing...
137
00:05:25,658 --> 00:05:26,659
Okay.
Spread out.
138
00:05:26,659 --> 00:05:28,161
(singing)
139
00:05:28,161 --> 00:05:29,162
Hi.
140
00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:30,163
Hi.
141
00:05:49,966 --> 00:05:51,968
Ricky, did you read the mail, dear?
142
00:05:51,968 --> 00:05:53,469
Mm-hmm.
143
00:05:53,469 --> 00:05:54,921
Well?
144
00:05:54,921 --> 00:05:56,122
Well what?
145
00:05:56,122 --> 00:05:59,058
Well, was there anything interesting
or different?
146
00:05:59,058 --> 00:06:00,309
No...
147
00:06:00,309 --> 00:06:02,478
Oh, yes, there was something.
148
00:06:02,478 --> 00:06:04,831
Oh? What?
149
00:06:04,831 --> 00:06:07,367
Ben Bisher caught a 115-pound
sailfish.
150
00:06:07,367 --> 00:06:11,337
Oh. Don't you have anything else to
tell me, Ricky?
151
00:06:11,337 --> 00:06:12,939
About what?
152
00:06:12,939 --> 00:06:16,142
About, about, about...
153
00:06:16,142 --> 00:06:19,495
(wailing)
154
00:06:19,495 --> 00:06:22,348
What's new.
155
00:06:22,348 --> 00:06:24,300
Lucy, are you all right?
156
00:06:24,300 --> 00:06:25,802
I'm fine.
157
00:06:25,802 --> 00:06:27,804
Well, honey, what are you crying
about?
158
00:06:27,804 --> 00:06:28,805
Did something happen?
159
00:06:28,805 --> 00:06:30,740
Yes, yes, that's it, something
happened.
160
00:06:30,740 --> 00:06:32,175
Well, what?
161
00:06:32,175 --> 00:06:33,976
Well, I bought a new hat
162
00:06:33,976 --> 00:06:36,229
and I don't know if you'll like it.
163
00:06:36,229 --> 00:06:37,730
Oh, honey, is that all?
164
00:06:37,730 --> 00:06:39,232
Well, let me see it.
165
00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:41,234
Oh, all right.
166
00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:48,508
Why, honey, I like it.
167
00:06:48,908 --> 00:06:50,626
It's real cute.
168
00:06:50,626 --> 00:06:53,362
I'm glad.
169
00:07:08,678 --> 00:07:10,179
Hi, Ethel.
170
00:07:10,179 --> 00:07:11,464
Hi.
171
00:07:19,472 --> 00:07:21,274
It's all true, Ethel.
172
00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:25,228
Ricky's been drafted and he's trying
to spare me
173
00:07:25,228 --> 00:07:27,280
by not telling me about it.
174
00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:30,983
(wailing)
175
00:07:30,983 --> 00:07:33,386
Oh, Ethel, you're such a good friend
176
00:07:33,386 --> 00:07:35,388
to take my troubles so hard.
177
00:07:35,388 --> 00:07:38,224
Thanks, but I've got troubles of my
own.
178
00:07:38,224 --> 00:07:41,027
Fred just told me he's going with
Ricky Monday.
179
00:07:41,027 --> 00:07:42,628
What?
180
00:07:42,628 --> 00:07:48,718
He wouldn't tell me where, bless his
fat little heart.
181
00:07:48,718 --> 00:07:51,888
You mean, he's been drafted?
182
00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:55,341
No, they're not that hard up.
183
00:07:55,341 --> 00:07:58,211
He must have enlisted.
184
00:07:58,611 --> 00:08:01,414
(wailing)
185
00:08:09,455 --> 00:08:11,858
Ethel, we got to pull ourselves
together.
186
00:08:11,858 --> 00:08:13,693
If our men are going to be
187
00:08:13,693 --> 00:08:15,178
so brave and so wonderful,
188
00:08:15,178 --> 00:08:16,963
the least we can do is make it
189
00:08:16,963 --> 00:08:19,081
as easy as possible for them.
190
00:08:19,081 --> 00:08:20,583
Yes.
191
00:08:22,869 --> 00:08:25,922
I'm knitting some socks for Fred,
too.
192
00:08:25,922 --> 00:08:28,508
That's nice.
193
00:08:28,508 --> 00:08:30,643
We got to be brave, Lucy.
194
00:08:30,643 --> 00:08:32,678
Brave.
195
00:08:32,678 --> 00:08:36,282
We've got to keep a stiff upper lip.
196
00:08:38,284 --> 00:08:40,786
Stiff.
197
00:08:40,786 --> 00:08:46,809
(wailing)
198
00:08:52,949 --> 00:08:57,770
Halt! Parade rest!
199
00:08:57,770 --> 00:09:07,964
(humming "Dixie")
200
00:09:07,964 --> 00:09:09,615
Right shoulder, arms!
201
00:09:09,615 --> 00:09:12,001
One, two, three!
202
00:09:14,003 --> 00:09:15,004
No, no, no!
203
00:09:15,004 --> 00:09:17,506
Who told you to throw your gun away?
204
00:09:17,506 --> 00:09:18,507
I'm sorry, Fred.
205
00:09:18,507 --> 00:09:19,508
Oh, you're sorry.
206
00:09:19,508 --> 00:09:21,010
What good does that do me?
207
00:09:21,010 --> 00:09:22,511
Come on, now, try it again.
208
00:09:22,511 --> 00:09:24,013
All right.
209
00:09:24,013 --> 00:09:25,514
Left face!
210
00:09:25,514 --> 00:09:27,016
Forward march!
211
00:09:27,016 --> 00:09:29,018
Hut!
212
00:09:29,018 --> 00:09:30,519
Hut!
213
00:09:30,519 --> 00:09:32,738
Hut!
214
00:09:33,139 --> 00:09:34,106
Hut!
215
00:09:34,106 --> 00:09:34,941
(coughing)
216
00:09:37,910 --> 00:09:38,911
What's the matter with you, Ricky?
217
00:09:39,412 --> 00:09:40,413
Why did you hut it?
218
00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:42,415
I didn't hut it, I was coughing!
219
00:09:42,415 --> 00:09:44,417
Well, how can I know whether you're
coughing or hutting?
220
00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:45,918
I don't know where you're going.
221
00:09:45,918 --> 00:09:47,420
I'm going this way, and you hut, hut,
hut.
222
00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:49,422
You've been doing it all afternoon.
223
00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:50,423
Now, what's the matter with you?
224
00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:52,425
Well, I'm sorry, Fred.
225
00:09:52,425 --> 00:09:54,427
I just don't seem to be able to
concentrate.
226
00:09:54,427 --> 00:09:55,928
I'm worried.
227
00:09:55,928 --> 00:09:56,929
About what?
228
00:09:56,929 --> 00:09:58,431
Well, maybe you can help me.
229
00:09:58,431 --> 00:10:01,350
You've been married for a long while,
haven't you?
230
00:10:01,350 --> 00:10:04,303
Now, why bring that up when we're
having such a good time?
231
00:10:05,554 --> 00:10:08,557
Well, maybe you know women better
than I do.
232
00:10:08,557 --> 00:10:10,776
Lucy's been acting strange lately.
233
00:10:10,776 --> 00:10:13,579
Strange?
How can you tell?
234
00:10:13,579 --> 00:10:14,780
Look, I'm serious.
235
00:10:14,780 --> 00:10:18,534
I mean, for one thing, she breaks
into tears
236
00:10:18,534 --> 00:10:20,036
for no reason at all,
237
00:10:20,036 --> 00:10:21,537
and she seems terribly nervous.
238
00:10:21,537 --> 00:10:23,923
And the other day, I walked into the
room
239
00:10:23,923 --> 00:10:26,392
and she hid whatever she was doing
behind her back.
240
00:10:26,392 --> 00:10:27,660
It looked like knitting.
241
00:10:28,060 --> 00:10:29,011
Knitting?!
242
00:10:29,011 --> 00:10:29,996
Yeah.
243
00:10:29,996 --> 00:10:35,301
Well, Ricky, my boy, congratulations!
244
00:10:35,301 --> 00:10:36,802
Congratulations?
245
00:10:36,802 --> 00:10:39,472
Why, it's as plain as the nose on
your face.
246
00:10:39,472 --> 00:10:41,073
You're going to be a father.
247
00:10:41,073 --> 00:10:43,876
Me? Father?
248
00:10:43,876 --> 00:10:45,978
When a woman cries for no reason,
249
00:10:45,978 --> 00:10:48,397
sits down and knits tiny little
things,
250
00:10:48,898 --> 00:10:50,116
what else?
251
00:10:50,116 --> 00:10:51,717
Me? Father?
252
00:10:51,717 --> 00:10:52,568
Of course!
253
00:10:52,568 --> 00:10:55,087
Me? Father?
254
00:10:55,087 --> 00:10:57,990
Yeah, you father, Lucy mother,
255
00:10:57,990 --> 00:10:59,992
me Tarzan!
256
00:11:04,747 --> 00:11:05,998
Oh, gosh.
257
00:11:05,998 --> 00:11:07,867
Well, now that we've straightened out
258
00:11:07,867 --> 00:11:10,336
your paternal status, let's go on
with the routine.
259
00:11:10,336 --> 00:11:11,671
Okay.
260
00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:14,173
Of course, it could be something
else.
261
00:11:14,173 --> 00:11:16,676
When are you going to take facts like
I do, Ricky?
262
00:11:17,076 --> 00:11:18,778
Ethel is nervous and weepy lately,
too.
263
00:11:18,778 --> 00:11:20,379
She's been knitting little things
264
00:11:20,379 --> 00:11:21,847
and hiding them from me.
265
00:11:21,847 --> 00:11:24,967
But you don't think that I...
266
00:11:24,967 --> 00:11:25,968
that I...
267
00:11:27,970 --> 00:11:30,973
No! Oh, no!
268
00:11:31,390 --> 00:11:32,591
Fred!
269
00:11:32,591 --> 00:11:36,228
Congratulations, old boy!
270
00:11:36,228 --> 00:11:39,532
Imagine that, both of them!
271
00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:41,534
I can't imagine it.
272
00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:43,536
Isn't that wonderful!
273
00:11:43,536 --> 00:11:45,538
Let's give them a shower.
274
00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:47,039
What for?
275
00:11:47,039 --> 00:11:49,041
I mean a surprise party shower.
276
00:11:49,041 --> 00:11:52,545
And we can try our act out on the
crowd.
277
00:11:52,545 --> 00:11:54,547
All right, we'll give them a surprise
party Sunday night
278
00:11:54,547 --> 00:11:56,048
before we leave for Fort Dix.
279
00:11:56,048 --> 00:11:57,049
Good deal!
280
00:11:57,049 --> 00:12:00,052
Gee whiz, Lucy's going to be a mother
281
00:12:00,052 --> 00:12:02,488
and I'm going to be a father.
282
00:12:02,488 --> 00:12:05,341
I know just how you feel, son.
283
00:12:05,341 --> 00:12:08,344
Ethel's going to be a mother
284
00:12:08,344 --> 00:12:11,347
and I'm going to be a f... f... f...
285
00:12:32,218 --> 00:12:34,220
Ethel, does this look right?
286
00:12:38,224 --> 00:12:39,692
Right for what?
287
00:12:39,692 --> 00:12:41,193
Well, you don't have to get nasty
about it.
288
00:12:41,193 --> 00:12:43,696
I suppose yours is going to win a
prize.
289
00:12:43,696 --> 00:12:45,197
It's better than yours.
290
00:12:45,197 --> 00:12:46,198
Let's see.
291
00:12:47,700 --> 00:12:49,702
Yeah, I guess you're right.
292
00:12:49,702 --> 00:12:52,204
Gee, I guess I'm past the sock stage.
293
00:12:52,204 --> 00:12:54,206
I better try for a blanket.
294
00:12:56,208 --> 00:12:58,210
I think you're past the blanket
stage.
295
00:12:58,210 --> 00:13:00,212
You'd better try for a tent.
296
00:13:00,212 --> 00:13:01,714
Oh, well, I'm surprised we can knit
at all,
297
00:13:01,714 --> 00:13:04,216
what with our husbands going into the
Army.
298
00:13:04,216 --> 00:13:06,719
Our two wonderful little boys.
299
00:13:06,719 --> 00:13:10,055
Yeah. Gee, they're so anxious to be
good soldiers.
300
00:13:10,055 --> 00:13:11,323
You know what they were doing
301
00:13:11,323 --> 00:13:12,925
when I went up to the apartment a
little while ago?
302
00:13:12,925 --> 00:13:14,126
What?
303
00:13:14,126 --> 00:13:14,927
Drilling.
304
00:13:14,927 --> 00:13:16,128
Drilling.
Yeah.
305
00:13:16,128 --> 00:13:18,531
Marching up and down with a broom and
a mop.
306
00:13:18,531 --> 00:13:22,601
Oh, I wish there was something more
we could do for them
307
00:13:22,601 --> 00:13:25,037
besides just knitting socks and
tents.
308
00:13:27,039 --> 00:13:30,342
I know, let's give them a going-away
party.
309
00:13:30,342 --> 00:13:32,011
A surprise party!
310
00:13:32,011 --> 00:13:34,296
Yeah, we'll give it Sunday night just
before they leave.
311
00:13:34,296 --> 00:13:35,114
That's a wonderful idea.
312
00:13:35,514 --> 00:13:36,515
Who will we ask?
313
00:13:36,515 --> 00:13:38,517
Well, let's see now, there's the
Sedgewicks,
314
00:13:38,517 --> 00:13:41,487
the Orsattis, the Bezelles, Billy
Josefi...
315
00:13:44,990 --> 00:13:47,910
Ethel, do you think the boys found
out about the party tonight?
316
00:13:47,910 --> 00:13:50,913
No. They can't think about anything
but going into the Army.
317
00:13:50,913 --> 00:13:53,415
Yeah. Gee, this is their last night
as civilians.
318
00:13:53,415 --> 00:13:55,201
Now, remember, we're not going to
argue with them,
319
00:13:55,201 --> 00:13:56,702
no matter what happens.
320
00:13:56,702 --> 00:13:59,205
I wouldn't think of it.
321
00:13:59,205 --> 00:14:00,706
Where are they now?
322
00:14:00,706 --> 00:14:02,508
They're downstairs drilling.
323
00:14:02,508 --> 00:14:04,577
Bless their little britches.
324
00:14:04,577 --> 00:14:05,878
Now, here's the plan for the party:
325
00:14:05,878 --> 00:14:08,380
I told everybody that I'd leave the
front door unlocked.
326
00:14:08,380 --> 00:14:09,682
Unlocked.
Yeah.
327
00:14:09,682 --> 00:14:12,484
And that they should tiptoe in and
hide someplace.
328
00:14:12,484 --> 00:14:14,720
How we gonna keep the boys occupied
so they won't notice?
329
00:14:14,720 --> 00:14:16,388
Oh, now, don't worry.
330
00:14:16,388 --> 00:14:17,690
We'll manage some way.
331
00:14:22,194 --> 00:14:23,696
Who left this door unlocked?
332
00:14:23,696 --> 00:14:25,197
I don't know.
333
00:14:25,197 --> 00:14:28,000
Listen, do you think the girls
suspect anything
334
00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:29,485
about the party tonight?
335
00:14:29,985 --> 00:14:30,986
No, with all that knitting
336
00:14:30,986 --> 00:14:32,872
and acting like little mothers,
337
00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:34,707
they don't know anything else is
going on.
338
00:14:37,209 --> 00:14:38,210
Listen, I told everybody
339
00:14:38,210 --> 00:14:40,212
that I was going to leave the back
door unlocked,
340
00:14:40,212 --> 00:14:43,499
and that they should sneak in through
the kitchen.
341
00:14:43,499 --> 00:14:45,751
So I want you to keep your eye on the
kitchen door.
342
00:14:45,751 --> 00:14:47,353
Well, how we gonna hide them from the
girls?
343
00:14:47,353 --> 00:14:49,171
Well, look, whenever the people start
coming in,
344
00:14:49,171 --> 00:14:50,673
we'll just have to figure out some
way
345
00:14:51,173 --> 00:14:53,175
to get the girls back into the
bedroom.
346
00:14:53,175 --> 00:14:55,177
Watch it now, here they come.
347
00:14:55,177 --> 00:14:56,178
I don't know.
348
00:14:56,178 --> 00:14:57,680
Oh, hi, fellas.
349
00:14:57,680 --> 00:14:59,665
Hi.
Hi, girls.
350
00:15:09,992 --> 00:15:13,245
(chuckling nervously)
351
00:15:13,746 --> 00:15:16,248
(all start speaking at once)
352
00:15:18,250 --> 00:15:21,253
(knocking)
353
00:15:21,253 --> 00:15:22,488
Did you hear anything?
354
00:15:22,488 --> 00:15:24,206
I thought I did.
355
00:15:24,206 --> 00:15:25,424
(knocking)
356
00:15:25,424 --> 00:15:27,376
I think someone's at the door.
357
00:15:27,376 --> 00:15:28,377
I'll get it.
358
00:15:28,377 --> 00:15:29,878
No, no, I'll get it!
359
00:15:29,878 --> 00:15:30,879
I'll get it!
360
00:15:30,879 --> 00:15:32,381
Oh, all right.
361
00:15:37,386 --> 00:15:38,837
No, there's no one here.
362
00:15:38,837 --> 00:15:42,608
Ricky, would you get me a drink of
water, please, dear?
363
00:15:42,608 --> 00:15:43,609
Oh, all right.
364
00:15:43,609 --> 00:15:45,110
I'd like a glass of water, too, Fred.
365
00:15:45,110 --> 00:15:46,111
Well, I'll get them both.
366
00:15:46,111 --> 00:15:47,613
No!
No!
367
00:15:49,114 --> 00:15:51,066
I can't drink a glass of water
368
00:15:51,066 --> 00:15:52,568
unless Fred brings it to me
369
00:15:52,568 --> 00:15:54,036
with his own little hands.
370
00:15:54,036 --> 00:15:55,037
Okay, I'll get 'em both.
371
00:15:55,037 --> 00:15:56,538
No!
No!
372
00:15:56,538 --> 00:15:59,041
Ricky... Ricky, honey, you wouldn't
want me to have anything
373
00:15:59,541 --> 00:16:01,543
that you didn't bring me your little
ole self,
374
00:16:01,543 --> 00:16:03,045
now, would you, baby?
375
00:16:03,045 --> 00:16:05,047
Well, honey, what difference would it
make...
376
00:16:05,047 --> 00:16:06,548
Well, it does make a difference,
though, honey.
377
00:16:06,548 --> 00:16:08,550
I can't tell you exactly what it is,
378
00:16:08,550 --> 00:16:10,052
but there is a difference.
379
00:16:10,052 --> 00:16:11,553
All right, all right.
380
00:16:11,553 --> 00:16:13,055
Well, we'll both go.
381
00:16:13,055 --> 00:16:14,056
LUCY: Okay.
382
00:16:18,644 --> 00:16:19,545
Shh!
383
00:16:19,545 --> 00:16:20,746
Where?
384
00:16:20,746 --> 00:16:21,947
The closet!
385
00:16:26,185 --> 00:16:27,686
Who locked that door?
386
00:16:27,686 --> 00:16:28,988
Well, unlock it.
387
00:16:35,944 --> 00:16:37,446
We brought you milk.
388
00:16:37,446 --> 00:16:38,447
Milk?
389
00:16:38,447 --> 00:16:39,948
It's better for you.
390
00:16:39,948 --> 00:16:41,450
Oh, thanks.
391
00:16:48,040 --> 00:16:50,042
How's the milk, girls?
392
00:16:50,042 --> 00:16:52,044
ETHEL: Fine.
393
00:16:52,044 --> 00:16:55,047
LUCY: It's all right if you like
milk.
394
00:16:55,047 --> 00:16:56,048
Uh, Lucy...
395
00:16:56,548 --> 00:16:57,549
Hmm?
396
00:16:57,549 --> 00:16:58,550
Your nose is shiny.
397
00:16:58,550 --> 00:17:00,552
It is? I just powdered it.
398
00:17:00,552 --> 00:17:02,054
Well, stand still a minute, will you?
399
00:17:02,054 --> 00:17:04,056
I want to see how my hair looks.
400
00:17:04,056 --> 00:17:05,557
Oh, you!
401
00:17:05,557 --> 00:17:08,193
Okay, I'll go powder it.
402
00:17:08,193 --> 00:17:10,729
Ethel's nose is shiny, too.
403
00:17:10,729 --> 00:17:12,147
It is not, is it, Fred?
404
00:17:12,147 --> 00:17:13,148
Well, I can't tell,
405
00:17:13,148 --> 00:17:15,150
there's such a bright reflection
coming off...
406
00:17:15,150 --> 00:17:18,654
Now, listen, Fred Mertz, it...
407
00:17:18,654 --> 00:17:19,655
Oh, all right.
408
00:17:19,655 --> 00:17:21,657
I'll go powder my nose.
409
00:17:26,161 --> 00:17:27,162
Where?
410
00:17:27,162 --> 00:17:28,163
The closet!
411
00:17:28,163 --> 00:17:29,164
Shh!
412
00:17:37,172 --> 00:17:38,590
Well, here we are.
413
00:17:38,590 --> 00:17:39,425
Do we look any better?
414
00:17:39,425 --> 00:17:40,926
Oh, yes, fine.
Look great now.
415
00:17:49,935 --> 00:17:51,437
Uh, Ricky, I'm thirsty again.
416
00:17:51,437 --> 00:17:53,939
Would you get me a drink of water,
dear?
417
00:17:53,939 --> 00:17:57,743
Well, honey, you haven't finished
this one yet.
418
00:17:57,743 --> 00:17:59,244
Oh.
419
00:18:01,246 --> 00:18:02,531
More milk.
420
00:18:02,531 --> 00:18:05,484
Ethel, you just had a full glass of
milk.
421
00:18:05,484 --> 00:18:07,836
I don't know why I seem to be so
thirsty tonight.
422
00:18:07,836 --> 00:18:10,839
I must have had something salty for
dinner.
423
00:18:10,839 --> 00:18:13,342
All right, all right, more milk.
424
00:18:13,342 --> 00:18:14,843
I'll get you some more, too, honey.
425
00:18:14,843 --> 00:18:16,345
All right.
426
00:18:19,848 --> 00:18:20,699
Shh!
427
00:18:20,699 --> 00:18:21,967
The closet?
428
00:18:21,967 --> 00:18:23,469
The closet.
429
00:18:39,735 --> 00:18:41,236
Here you are, girls.
430
00:18:49,244 --> 00:18:50,746
Uh, Lucy?
431
00:18:50,746 --> 00:18:51,747
What?
432
00:18:51,747 --> 00:18:53,248
Your nose is shiny again.
433
00:18:53,248 --> 00:18:56,752
Oh, now, Ricky, really, it couldn't
be shiny...
434
00:18:56,752 --> 00:18:58,253
Oh, all right, dear.
435
00:18:58,253 --> 00:18:59,755
And Ethel...
436
00:18:59,755 --> 00:19:01,256
I know, I'm going.
437
00:19:05,761 --> 00:19:06,762
Where?
438
00:19:06,762 --> 00:19:07,763
The closet!
439
00:19:17,573 --> 00:19:20,359
Hey, Fred, come on, I got a wonderful
idea.
440
00:19:20,359 --> 00:19:21,860
Good.
441
00:19:33,372 --> 00:19:36,375
(guffawing)
442
00:19:38,377 --> 00:19:40,379
Oh, Lucy, you're crazy!
443
00:19:40,379 --> 00:19:43,882
I'm glad you kids didn't lose your
sense of humor.
444
00:19:43,882 --> 00:19:45,551
Why should we lose our sense of
humor?
445
00:19:45,551 --> 00:19:46,802
Yeah.
446
00:19:46,802 --> 00:19:48,303
Well, you know how women act
447
00:19:48,303 --> 00:19:50,305
when they're in your condition.
448
00:19:50,305 --> 00:19:52,791
My condition?
What's my condition?
449
00:19:52,791 --> 00:19:53,609
Well, honey...
450
00:19:54,109 --> 00:19:54,927
The same as Ethel's.
451
00:19:54,927 --> 00:19:56,195
Ethel's?
452
00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:57,696
Sure, we know all about it.
453
00:19:57,696 --> 00:19:58,964
Come on, honey, sit down.
454
00:19:58,964 --> 00:20:00,866
You have to take it real easy, you
know,
455
00:20:00,866 --> 00:20:01,867
and have a good rest,
456
00:20:01,867 --> 00:20:03,368
be real comfortable all the time.
457
00:20:03,368 --> 00:20:05,037
Fred, what are you talking about?
458
00:20:05,037 --> 00:20:06,455
Come on, darling, sit down now.
459
00:20:06,455 --> 00:20:08,140
Why?
460
00:20:08,140 --> 00:20:11,543
(humming)
461
00:20:11,543 --> 00:20:13,328
Coochie, coochie, coochie.
462
00:20:13,328 --> 00:20:14,830
Now, wait a minute.
463
00:20:14,830 --> 00:20:17,132
You guys act like somebody's going to
have a baby.
464
00:20:17,132 --> 00:20:18,634
Well, someone is.
465
00:20:18,634 --> 00:20:20,652
(gasps)
466
00:20:22,287 --> 00:20:23,889
Well, don't look at me!
467
00:20:24,756 --> 00:20:26,758
(gasps)
468
00:20:26,758 --> 00:20:28,360
Well, don't look at me!
469
00:20:29,962 --> 00:20:34,650
Well, don't look at us!
470
00:20:34,650 --> 00:20:35,901
Well, what made you think
471
00:20:35,901 --> 00:20:38,387
anybody was going to have a baby?
472
00:20:38,387 --> 00:20:41,356
Well what were all those little
things that you were knitting?
473
00:20:41,356 --> 00:20:42,858
Knitting!
474
00:20:42,858 --> 00:20:44,860
Oh, honey, we were knitting socks
475
00:20:44,860 --> 00:20:47,613
for you and Fred to take to Fort Dix
tomorrow.
476
00:20:47,613 --> 00:20:49,915
(laughing)
477
00:20:49,915 --> 00:20:50,916
You knew about that?
478
00:20:50,916 --> 00:20:53,919
Yes, and we're just dying to see you
in your uniforms.
479
00:20:53,919 --> 00:20:55,687
Well, come on, Rick, let's put them
on.
480
00:20:55,687 --> 00:20:56,955
Yeah, we'll put them on!
481
00:20:56,955 --> 00:20:57,456
Let's go, Fred!
482
00:20:57,456 --> 00:20:58,957
We'll put them right on.
483
00:20:59,958 --> 00:21:02,527
Oh, imagine them thinking we were
going to have babies!
484
00:21:02,527 --> 00:21:05,797
Yeah, they certainly can jump at some
wrong conclusions.
485
00:21:05,797 --> 00:21:07,683
Yeah. Gee, I wish there were
486
00:21:07,683 --> 00:21:10,302
some wrong conclusions that we could
jump to.
487
00:21:10,302 --> 00:21:11,503
RICKY: Are you ready, girls?!
488
00:21:11,903 --> 00:21:13,855
Yes!
Yeah, we're ready.
489
00:21:13,855 --> 00:21:17,359
Ooh, we're going to get to see our
soldier boys!
490
00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:19,861
RICKY: Are you ready, Colonel Mertz?
491
00:21:19,861 --> 00:21:21,113
Colonel?
492
00:21:21,113 --> 00:21:23,148
FRED: Ready, General Ricardo!
493
00:21:23,148 --> 00:21:24,950
General?
494
00:21:24,950 --> 00:21:27,452
(humming "Dixie")
495
00:21:33,458 --> 00:21:38,463
Ethel, they're fighting on opposite
sides!
496
00:21:42,100 --> 00:21:44,002
(all laughing)
497
00:21:45,504 --> 00:21:48,006
Oh, Ricky, you should have seen
498
00:21:48,006 --> 00:21:50,008
the expression on your face!
499
00:21:50,008 --> 00:21:52,010
Well, honey, how was I supposed to
know?
500
00:21:52,010 --> 00:21:55,180
Well, we all did some pretty fancy
jumping to conclusions!
501
00:21:55,180 --> 00:21:56,565
You know what?
What?
502
00:21:56,565 --> 00:21:58,033
We invited everyone here
503
00:21:58,033 --> 00:21:59,685
for a going-away party!
504
00:21:59,685 --> 00:22:00,686
No kidding!
505
00:22:00,686 --> 00:22:02,187
Well, you know something?
506
00:22:02,187 --> 00:22:04,056
We invited them over here for a
shower.
507
00:22:04,056 --> 00:22:05,440
A shower?
508
00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:06,942
(laughter)
509
00:22:06,942 --> 00:22:08,894
ALL: The closet!
510
00:22:13,198 --> 00:22:14,700
Oh, look at these poor people!
511
00:22:14,700 --> 00:22:15,701
Easy!
512
00:22:15,701 --> 00:22:17,703
Easy!
513
00:22:17,703 --> 00:22:18,704
Easy!
514
00:22:28,714 --> 00:22:30,215
Pull them apart!
Pull them apart!
515
00:22:30,716 --> 00:22:31,717
Unglue, unglue.
516
00:22:31,717 --> 00:22:33,719
Unglue them there, pull them apart!
517
00:22:36,855 --> 00:22:40,225
ANNOUNCER: Lucy and Ricky will be
back with a little surprise.
518
00:22:40,225 --> 00:22:41,426
Stand by.
519
00:22:42,227 --> 00:22:48,166
(clock chiming)
520
00:22:58,226 --> 00:22:59,227
(screaming)
521
00:22:59,227 --> 00:23:01,229
(all laughing)
522
00:23:01,229 --> 00:23:02,731
Oh, look!
523
00:23:02,731 --> 00:23:04,232
Fred!
Ethel!
Lucy!
524
00:23:05,233 --> 00:23:06,234
Fred!
525
00:23:06,234 --> 00:23:07,736
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas!
526
00:23:07,736 --> 00:23:09,237
(all laughing)
527
00:23:09,237 --> 00:23:11,239
Merry Christmas, Fred.
528
00:23:11,239 --> 00:23:13,742
We're all Santa Clauses.
529
00:23:13,742 --> 00:23:14,743
Yeah.
530
00:23:14,743 --> 00:23:16,244
How about that.
531
00:23:16,244 --> 00:23:17,746
Let's put our presents under the
tree.
532
00:23:18,246 --> 00:23:19,748
Okay, okay, here we go.
533
00:23:19,748 --> 00:23:20,749
Oh, that's nice.
534
00:23:20,749 --> 00:23:21,750
(laughter)
535
00:23:21,750 --> 00:23:23,251
Gee!
536
00:23:23,251 --> 00:23:26,254
Hey, Santa, you put on
537
00:23:26,254 --> 00:23:27,756
a little weight, didn't you?
538
00:23:27,756 --> 00:23:29,257
How about you?
539
00:23:29,257 --> 00:23:30,258
Yeah.
540
00:23:30,258 --> 00:23:32,260
How about you, Ethel?
541
00:23:32,761 --> 00:23:35,764
Fred, where'd you ever find such a
big pillow?
542
00:23:35,764 --> 00:23:37,265
Huh? Why aren't you answering me?
543
00:23:37,265 --> 00:23:38,767
I'm not wearing a pillow.
544
00:23:38,767 --> 00:23:40,268
Oh!
545
00:23:40,268 --> 00:23:41,770
Come on, let's open all our presents.
546
00:23:41,770 --> 00:23:42,270
All right.
547
00:23:42,270 --> 00:23:43,271
Okay.
548
00:23:43,271 --> 00:23:44,773
Oh, no, no, let's sing first.
549
00:23:44,773 --> 00:23:45,774
Sing?
Sing?
Sing?
550
00:23:45,774 --> 00:23:46,274
Well, yeah.
551
00:23:46,775 --> 00:23:48,276
Everything is so wonderful,
552
00:23:48,276 --> 00:23:51,780
and spending Christmas with our good
friends...
553
00:23:51,780 --> 00:23:53,782
I just feel like serenading the
world.
554
00:23:53,782 --> 00:23:54,900
Okay.
555
00:23:54,900 --> 00:23:56,318
I know a wonderful Cuban melody.
556
00:23:56,318 --> 00:23:57,319
It's called "Cascabeles."
557
00:23:57,319 --> 00:23:58,320
FRED: Well, let's hear it.
558
00:23:58,320 --> 00:23:59,321
Go ahead, sing it.
All right.
559
00:23:59,321 --> 00:24:01,823
Cascabeles, cascabeles
560
00:24:01,823 --> 00:24:03,325
Cantan todo el día
561
00:24:03,325 --> 00:24:05,327
Cascabeles, cascabeles
562
00:24:05,327 --> 00:24:06,828
Traen la alegria
563
00:24:06,828 --> 00:24:07,829
Hey!
564
00:24:07,829 --> 00:24:09,331
That's "Jingle Bells."
565
00:24:09,331 --> 00:24:10,332
"Jingle Bells"?
566
00:24:10,332 --> 00:24:11,633
Sure.
567
00:24:11,633 --> 00:24:12,634
Well, how about that.
568
00:24:12,634 --> 00:24:14,636
You Americans steal all our good
songs.
569
00:24:14,636 --> 00:24:15,637
(laughing)
570
00:24:15,637 --> 00:24:18,140
Hey, let's all sing it, huh, Santa
Clauses?
571
00:24:18,140 --> 00:24:19,141
All right.
All right.
All right.
572
00:24:19,141 --> 00:24:24,146
Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle
all the way
573
00:24:24,146 --> 00:24:27,149
Oh, what fun it is to ride in a
one-horse open sleigh
574
00:24:27,149 --> 00:24:31,153
Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle
all the way
575
00:24:31,153 --> 00:24:35,157
Oh, what fun it is to ride in a
one-horse open sleigh
576
00:24:35,157 --> 00:24:38,643
Dashing through the snow, in a
one-horse open sleigh
577
00:24:38,643 --> 00:24:42,247
O'er the fields we go, laughing all
the way
578
00:24:42,681 --> 00:24:46,001
Bells on bobtail ring, making spirits
bright
579
00:24:46,001 --> 00:24:48,003
What fun it is to ride and sing
580
00:24:48,003 --> 00:24:49,504
A sleighing song tonight
581
00:24:49,504 --> 00:24:53,508
Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells,
jingle all the way
582
00:24:53,508 --> 00:24:57,012
Oh, what fun it is to ride in a
one-horse open sleigh
583
00:24:57,012 --> 00:25:01,016
Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle
all the way
584
00:25:01,016 --> 00:25:04,519
Oh, what fun it is to ride in a
one-horse open sleigh.
585
00:25:04,519 --> 00:25:08,023
(laughing merrily)
586
00:25:20,035 --> 00:25:21,536
Ow!
587
00:25:40,906 --> 00:25:44,109
ALL: Merry Christmas, everybody!
588
00:25:46,244 --> 00:25:48,246
(I Love Lucy theme music plays)
589
00:25:48,246 --> 00:25:52,334
Captioned by Media Access Group at
WGBH access.wgbh.org
38895
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